June Bride (1948) - full transcript

Foreign correspondent Carey Jackson is offered a job on Home Life, a "women's" magazine; he accepts when he finds the editor is his old flame Linda Gilman. Verbal pyrotechnics fly between Carey and Linda as they go to Indiana to cover the Brinker family's "typical American wedding." But triangles lurk beneath the surface of the impending nuptials. Can Carey rescue a story (and his job) out of the wreckage? Can all the sundered hearts be re-united?


He isn't in.

Want to make a bet?

Oh, you are Cary Jackson?
- So I am.

Yeah. I thought so.

That is, you look like you.

I mean, you look like the
picture in the column.

Mr Jackson, I read everything you write.

So do I.
- Yeah?

Mr Towne wants to see you right away.
- Does he?

There is somebody in with him right now.
- Oh.

Hi, genius.
- Hi.

I thought you were in Vienna.
- Just got back.

How are things here at the factory?
- The big axe is swinging.

Any casualties?

Me. I just got bounced from Home Life.

I am sorry.
- I'm not.

The toughest editor I ever met.

Mr Jackson, Mr Towne will see you now.

He will?

See you around.

Cary. Come in, dear boy.

It is wonderful to see you.

Did you have a good trip?
- Very pleasant thanks.

Fine.

Pretty "luxe".

It cost a fortune. It's real leather.

It must be like living in a wallet.

Sit down, Carey.

Thank you.

Will you have a cigar?

Thank you.

My, you are being nice to me.

Why not?
- It's not like you. That's why not.

Either you are softening with
old age or I am being fired.

You got my cable about coming back?

Obviously. I hopped the first plane.

Well, we are closing the Vienna office.

So I gathered when they
took out the carpets.

With censorship so tight not enough news
came through to make it worthwhile.

So we are closing the office.
- Ah, yes.

Where do I go next?

London again?

Charlie Morrison has been doing a good
job in London. He has three children.

So he has.

What about Paris?

Ira Young has been with us a long time.

Carey, I wonder if I
could speak frankly.

Try.

You were one of the best foreign
correspondents we've ever had.

One of the very best.
- "Were".

Past tense.

Meaning I no longer "am".

I am fired.

I just don't have an
assignment for you right now.

Things have changed, Carey.

During the war our readers
went for personality news.

I did this. I did that.

That's all over.

First-person news is out.

Okay. I'm out.

Now don't get sore, Carey.

You could have given me the
heave-ho a little more gracefully.

Well, you are an institution.
It's pretty hard to fire an institution.

Got any plans? A book maybe?

At the last count there were 1,412 books
explaining Europe to American readers.

Radio then?

I am no good at crystal ball reporting.

It sounds pretty barren.

Not much doing in the states.
How are you fixed for money?

As usual I am un-loaded.

Well of course, there is always ..

No. You wouldn't go for that.

It's not good enough for you.
It's a job of course.

You wouldn't be interested. Forget it.

I have a feeling you are trying to
manoeuvre me into something.

You won't like it.

I know that or you wouldn't go to all
this trouble. What is on your mind?

I have a job open. Feature stuff
on our biggest magazine.

Home Life?

What would I do on that
woman's magazine?

Write about the new look?

"Read Carey Jackson's
sensational new series."

"I was a woman for six weeks."

It's not that bad.

How bad is it?

We need someone with talent for our
new 'Home Life In America' series.

You know the kind of stuff it is.

Yes, I know.

"This month Home Life visits the Calcack
family in Upper Calcack county."

"See how they build their dear
little home and swimming pool."

"With a hatchet, soup-spoon and a cookie
cutter for three dollars and 12 cents."

Corn. Rich, luscious, nauseating corn.

I only wish it were.

Right now, the feature is as reverent
as a Sunday School pamphlet.

You want me to hoke it up?

Exactly. You've a talent for digging up
exciting human stories. How about it?

No thank you.

I would be lost.
It is not my dish of tea.

Old boy.
- Now look.

Ordinarily, I'd never think to offer a
writer of your ability this kind of job.

That makes us even.
I wouldn't dream of accepting it.

I'm in a jam.

I need somebody like you.

Now, you are good-looking.

Charming. A good sense
of humor. Intelligent.

And an attractive personality.

Are you offering me a
job or proposing to me?

What is the score around here?
And don't soap me.

You gave Stafford the gate.
I saw him outside.

He muttered something
about a tough editor.

Tough? That is the
understatement of the year.

You are the only writer I know
who can get along with her.

Her?

Who is her?

Linda Gilman.

Linda?

So, she is an editor?

She finally made it.
- About two years ago.

She's doing a first-class job
but she beats writers' brains in.

I haven't found anybody who
could take it for very long.

But I had to get you back. I remembered
there was something between you once.

Hmm.

No comment.

That's what I thought.

I knew you could work
with her if anybody could.

What does she think of the idea?

She doesn't know about it yet.

There are reasons why she might not be
violently enamoured of having me around.

You will do it?

That settles it.
- Not quite.

Who's going to tell her?

When I was thinking about it I said to
myself I had better let you tell her.

As you're in a jam you might have said
words to yourself about a raise for me.

Blackmailer.

I hate myself.

How much?
- A hundred a month.

I can't hear you.

Two hundred.

I can hear you.
- Good. It is a deal.

With Linda in the picture you
could have gotten me cheaper.

Ha! With Linda in the
picture it is worth it.

Oh.

When do I start?
- Right away.

She leaves for Indiana in a few
days and I want you to go with her.

Now Remember, Carey.
I want a little life in this feature.

Laughter, romance.

S-e-x?

R-i-g-h-t.

Another thing, Carey.

I wouldn't mention this chat
to Linda if I were you.

Yes, I know what you mean.
I've always been scared of her too.

Have you finished the layout, Rosemary?

Certainly, Madam Editor.

Oh, it's you.

I have never denied it.

You are back.

A good guess.

Hello.

And a great big enthusiastic
hello to you too.

How have you been, Linda?

Reasonably well considering I haven't
had you around for the last three years.

Three years? My, my.
Has it been that long?

Yes.

The last time I saw you
we had lunch at Marcel's.

That was August 12th 1945.

We were supposed to dine at Caesar's.

Only you went to Berlin instead.

I might have known you would remember.

By the way, our date is off, isn't it?

When I didn't hear from you for three
years I leaped to that conclusion.

You heel.

Oh, now don't be like that.

You are right. It is ancient history.

Anyway.

You are not really a heel.
You just give that impression.

That's better.

A nice office you've got here.

I understand you are an editor now.

Congratulations.

What do you want?

Can't I stop in and say hello
without being suspected?

You are being charming,
reasonable and very boyish.

Unless you have changed that means you
are about to drink someone's blood.

Probably mine.

I've just been up to see Towne.

He fired me.

Really?

And here was I thinking
he couldn't read.

You are sweet. Anyhow,
he hired me back again.

What as?

A writer.
- He can't read.

Do you .. know who my new boss is?

No.

Who?

You.

Oh no.

He wouldn't do that to me.
- He has already done it.

I'm assigned to the 'Home
Life in America' series.

Over my dead.

It's not flattering you, know. After all
I am still very handy with a typewriter.

Answer the phone.

I don't see why you are boiling over.

What's the matter with me?

I am gay, I am loveable
and I've got nice teeth.

What more do you want?

Hello?

Mr Towne, please. Linda Gilman speaking.

He is where?

Out of the city unexpectedly.

Tell him he is a liar.

It's a little embarrassing.

Editors don't usually try to jump out
of windows at the idea of hiring me.

Being as tactful as possible,
let me put it this way.

I don't want you around.
- Ha.

A grudge-nurser.

Nothing personal. You are a fine fellow.

And I have long since stopped resenting
the way you walked out on me.

But I won't have you on my magazine.

Not while I am editor.

Why not? I could do a good job for you.

You are used to big news,
exciting stories.

The most exciting thing that happens
to the people we write about ..

Is a five-dollar raise for Pa.

You will be utterly bored.

And start making fun of them.

It wouldn't work out.

Well, at least couldn't
we talk about it?

Where are you headed for?

Dinner.
- Date?

Have dinner with me then.

The one we missed three years ago.
- I am glad I didn't wait.

We can have dinner at Caesar's.
They don't know my credit is no good.

It has gotten frightfully expensive.

Sherwins, then.

It will only be about five
bucks for the two of us.

You can afford that much.

I had a lovely time. Lovely, thank you.

It was ..

Lovely.

Lovely?

Yes.

Well, I have to get up
early in the morning.

Goodnight.
- Goodnight.

I can only stay for a minute.

You are so right.

How do you want your drink?

In a glass.

Water?

Uhuh.

This is friendly.

I like it.

What?

Getting acquainted again.

Picking up where we left off.

Not one single bygone is going to be
a bygone as far as I am concerned.

Look, if you are sore about
me walking out on us ..

I can explain.

I am definitely not interested.

Much.

You were pretty ambitious in those days.

Very sure of yourself.

I still am.

You know exactly what you wanted.

Where you were going
and how to get there.

I sound like a subway.

Stop creeping up on me.

That day that I left after
we had lunch together.

I started walking down Madison Avenue.

Looking store windows
and feeling wonderful.

Because I had been with you.

Then suddenly, I had
a terrible realization.

That you had forgotten to
borrow cab fare from me?

No. No, I remembered that.

I found myself looking at furniture.

To buy.

Household stuff.

Parlor suites, bedroom suites.

Two dollars down and two dollars a week.

One thousand five hundred
and sixty-seven weeks to pay.

For the first time in my life
I wanted to get married.

You bowled me over.

No other woman had ever
affected me that way.

I wanted to marry you. I wanted to
settle down. I wanted to have ..

Oh.

I must have stood there for half an hour
thinking how wonderful it would be.

Then what?

Well, I went right down ..

And hopped the first plane for Germany.

I couldn't live the way you do.

Tied down. Everything all planned out.

You always were that way.

Even when I was made love to you I had
a feeling you wondered what time it was.

That is not the sweetest thing
anyone has ever said to me.

Well, I guess I am allergic
to career women.

I had enough of that when I was a kid.

My mother was president
of a lumber company.

She used to nurse me by appointment.

So.

You ran away from me because
your mother gave you splinters.

Something like that.

But it wasn't you I was running
away from. It was the way I felt.

I suppose you were terribly angry.

Not exactly.

I simply couldn't understand it.
No explanations, no letters. No nothing.

It became pretty obvious
I had been given the air.

But it wasn't like that.

Oh yes it was.

It hurt.

Very much.

Oh.

Oh, I am sorry.

Oh, I got over it.

Completely?

I hate to shatter that ..

Supremely male certainty of yours
that you have ruined my life but ..

I am extremely happy the way things are.

Well, how are things?

I'm successful.

I have a certain stature in my work.

A considerable amount
of money in the bank.

And I do pretty well as I please.

For male companionship.

A miserable existence to be sure.

The kind of misery worth
being miserable for.

Well.

All the same, if I had stayed ..

That furniture would have
almost been paid for by now.

There is one thing that has
obviously never occurred to you.

I don't think I would have married you.

You wouldn't?

Why should I? Give me one good reason.

Linda, I am amazed.

You returned ..

Expecting to find a broken butterfly
quivering in the void of your absence.

Didn't you?

Yes.

Yes. You are right.

I expected you to stare
at me in hurt reproach.

And I would explain to you in simple but
brotherly terms it was better this way.

Much to my amazement, it is.

Kinda like old times, isn't it.

I wouldn't be too sure.

No, I mean talking.
We always did talk a lot.

Too much, maybe.

What do you mean by that?

I don't know.

Sometimes I think we talked away ..

Everything that ever
meant anything to us.

Oh.

Not everything.

Ouch!

You are smooth.

And charming.

You turn it on like hot
water from a faucet.

But I have had measles once.
Now I am immune.

I always know what
time it is now, Carey.

It is 11:20.

I have to be up early.

Carey, you dear gullible boy,
you just struck out.

Look, Linda.

We know each other
too well for all this.

We still go for each other.
It will always be that way with us.

You know that too.

Well then, why?

Because you are very causal
about these things, Carey.

I'm not.

It gives you an advantage.

I would wake up one
morning and find you were ..

In Afghanistan.

Oh, Linda.

If we ever ..

Mean anything to each
other again which I doubt.

It will have to be on ..

My terms.

Not yours.

Don't you call me.

I'll call you.

Alright.

I'll go quietly.

Quietly and sadly into the night.

One fun-loving Carey Jackson.

Shmoe of the week.

I almost forgot. I must have been
thinking of something else.

How about that job?

Do I get it?

Yes.

Goody, goody.
- On several conditions.

I am editor. I am running the magazine.

Tom gave you the assignment but
you will have to take orders from me.

A pleasure, boss.

And, you will have to
forget I am a woman.

I will try.

Linda Gilman is not a woman.
Linda Gilman is not a woman.

Have a cigar.

Thanks.

I'll smoke it after breakfast.

Morning.

Morning, Paula.

Well.

It looks like you had
a nice time last night.

I hope so. I'd hate to
feel like this for nothing.

I hate to intrude on your misery
but if we are going to Indiana ..

You had better fill
us in with the details.

Get the staff together.
- They're waiting outside.

Carey Jackson is here too.

He is our new writer.

How did that happen?

I have influence.

Paula darling, would you be a dear sweet
girl and get my notes out of the drawer.

I have a distinct impression.

If I lean any further my
left eye will fall out.

Thank you.

Herd them in.

Stout fellow.

Upward and onward for Home Life.

Gay mad Linda Gilman carries on.

This is it.

Where is it this time?
- Indiana somewhere.

I hope they have plumbing.
- They won't.

How can a nice boy like you get
mixed up in a business like this?

Just lucky, I guess.

Come close.

Morning, Carey.

Morning, sir.

Have you met everybody?

Yeah.

We can get started then.

Sit down somewhere, Joe.

I'll make this short.

Joe and Woody.

You will stay in New York and plate
up the copy as fast as it comes in.

The rest of us are going
to Crestville Indiana.

The family's name is Brinker.

Two young girls.

The usual number of parents.

Mr Brinker owns a hardware store.

The house is a museum piece.
So is Mrs Brinker.

Paula, you must put her on a diet.

Don't I always?

Just to satisfy my curiosity.

How did you happen to pick
on this particular family?

Mrs Brinker has been corresponding
with us for years about the feature.

Her daughter is being married and
she happens to fit into our schedule.

Which one of the children is
making this dreadful mistake?

Jean. The oldest.

She understands we have a deadline and
are working on the June issue right now.

She is willing to be
married right way for us.

Paula.

You'll see that their clothes
are brought up to date.

Here are the dimensions of the Brinkers.

Use light summery material.

Have they heard of the
"new look" in Indiana?

You would be surprised.

I saw some clothes in
Indianapolis last week ..

That had necklines all the
way down to Kentucky.

Rosemary.

You'll make up the usual household
budget and weekly menus.

Keep them simple.

Scott, you'd better take all the
before pictures right away.

Exterior and interior.

And please this time try
to resist the cheesecake.

These people have faces too you know.

And Carey, this will be 19-page feature.

About 5,000 words.

Here are my background notes.

We'll call it "June Bride".

Isn't that a little daring?

Now.

Don't go overboard. Remember
this is an average small-town family.

And they must live with the house, the
clothes and the neighbors after we go.

Watch your language.
They don't understand it in Indiana.

Don't they speak English?

Not that kind.

I went out and saw
Mrs Brinker last week.

She expects all of you tomorrow.

She is going to bake a cake.

Oh no!

Well, it is winter and we have to do
a June wedding in less than a week.

I'm depending on you. Any questions?

That's all then.

Carey, you and I are
flying out this afternoon.

Four feet of snow.
Better wear your longies.

Would you like your lunch now?

Well, at least I'm getting a rough idea
of what I am going to do to the house.

I wish I had a rough idea of what
I was going to use for a story.

You have your story already.

"19-year-old Indiana girl
marries boy next door".

It's America at its best.

You are really getting
folksy, aren't you.

Next thing I know you'll be crocheting.

Or putting up pickled cucumber pits.

Stop sneering in that superior way of
yours at the important things in life.

Who is sneering?

I just want something to write about.

What have I got?

Crestville Indiana, USA.
Home of the Brinker family.

The Brinkers are happily married.
No mortgage on the house.

So far, the excitement of this
assignment is not exactly intense.

Cheer up. Dear mother will buy you a
kiddie car when you return to New York.

Two Brinker children.

Jean, age 19.

And ..

Boo .. aged 17.

Boo?
- Short for Barbara.

Jean couldn't pronounce
Barbara when they were babies.

She called her Boo and it stuck.

That ought to make a
nice zippy paragraph.

What are these harpies like?
- Jean is very pretty.

Very.

Uhuh.

Wipe off your chin, dear.
The groom plays football.

Oh.

There is a taxi.

Cold?

That is Mr Brinker's store.

It might be a good idea for you
to go through it if you get a chance.

And see what a typical
small-town store is like.

You can work it into the story.
- What story?

The only I will get story out of this ..

Is for typical Mr Brinker take typical
Mrs Brinker out and beat her to death.

With a typical meat ax.

Let me help you. Sir.

How much further is it?

Huh?

I said, how far is it?

I never measured it.

Nice country.

Hmm.

Must be wonderful here
in the summertime.

Hmm.

They ..

They call this the Hoosier
State, don't they?

Hmm.

Does that mean yes?

I don't like to chew my cabbage twice.

If that's an answer in Indiana I'm
going to be a little short on material.

I wish I had a gimmick.

Say, maybe there is insanity
in the Brinker family?

Every family has an uncle
who is missing a few buttons.

I'm beginning to think that
massive intellect of yours is ..

Toying with the idea
of angling this story.

What else?

I'm very serious about this, Carey.

I won't stand for any hokum.

These are respectable dignified people.

And we are not going to make them
ridiculous in their own community by ..

Puffing their personal history
into a dramatic tour-de-force.

You are going to write a
straight young love story.

No twists, no angles and no drama.

I am?

And you are going to
be nice to the Brinkers.

No little jokes at their expense.
- Hmm.

Carey, please be ..

Be charming.
- Alright.

I'll be charming.

I solemnly swear that I will
be like one of the family.

So charming that the Brinkers will cry
all the way to the station when I leave.

Hmm.

One thing you'll have to
learn about Indiana people.

They don't talk a great
deal unless it is important.

Yeah. I know why.

They are afraid if they open their
mouths they'll freeze their teeth.

Someone is coming.
- I hope it is a St Bernard.

It is.
- Carey.

My dear Mrs Brinker.

I would know you anywhere.

It is so very nice to see you and how
are all the children, Mrs Brinker?

Wasn't hat charming enough?
- Yes dear.

There was only one
little thing the matter.

That wasn't Mrs Brinker.

Did somebody come in?

Hello.

I'll be right down.
Don't steal anything.

We'll try not to.

Who is that?

It sounds like Boo.

I quit.

It's a purple horror alright but
we can do something with it.

Yeah. You can set fire
to it in several places.

It won't be half bad.

When we get rid of some
of the knick-knacks.

We are going to cut away
all this scroll work.

But I am going to keep this.

Gay, don't you think?
- Hilarious.

Don't look now but it seems
to me the wallpaper is a little ..

Busy.

We'll paint over it.

Well, this is where we are
going to have the wedding.

Making this look like June
isn't going to be easy.

Unless a thaw sets in.

Personally, I feel a kind-of a
nervous breakdown coming on.

You don't mean to tell you think you can
do something with this funeral parlor?

Wait. You will be surprised.

Why the sardonic smirk?

No, I wasn't smirking.

If you must know I was
looking at you with ..

New respect.

Why?

Because I know my business?

No.

I thought you would be
out of place in Indiana.

Now I can even imagine
you churning a tub of butter.

How did I make out?

Your hair got in your eyes
but you looked wonderful.

Linda.

This is the kitchen.

Oh, that of course explains
why it looks like a kitchen.

It is supposed to be bad luck.
Ghosts come and sit in it.

I beg your pardon.

I dream about this
plate rack every night.

I can't take it out of the wall
without ruining the plaster.

I haven't the slightest
idea what to do with it.

Well, don't look at me. I'm lost.

Do you go through this every month?

No. It is not ..

Usually so complicated.

Well, this is all there is downstairs.
The upstairs is easier.

You are really interested in
this kind of work aren't you.

Of course.

A forty coupon.

A what?

They used to give away these
masterpieces with soap coupons.

How can you talk about soap ..

When I am feeling so affectionate?

You must be thawing out.

Linda, we're going to be
here for a whole week ..

And I have what I think
is a wonderful idea.

Why don't you go over to the
hotel and take a nice cold shower?

I give up.
- Oh no. Don't.

Give up, that is.

Very interesting. Nobody
makes love like that in Indiana.

Or anywhere else.

Hello, Boo dear.

How nice to see you again.

This is Carey Jackson,
our feature writer.

Don't go too near him.

He wants did ju-jitsu.

Mother and Jean will be right down.

We didn't expect you so soon and
they are getting dressed up like crazy.

Who is the ..

The lady who let us in?

It must have been
Mrs Lace from next door.

She is helping us get
ready for the wedding.

Everything all set?

Well, yes and no.

Nothing wrong I hope?

Mother is in a tizz now that
the moment has almost arrived.

Well Bud's aunt Grace ..
- Bud?

The groom. Go on, dear.
What about aunt Grace?

She wrote from Indianapolis and
they do say she is plenty wild.

What about?

I don't know all the
details, Miss Gilman.

It's something about aunt Grace thinking
it awful to be written up in a magazine.

Has aunt Grace much
influence with the family?

Aunt Grace is loaded with dough.

Aunt Grace has influence.

It looks like we are in trouble.

My father says,
what with taxes and all ..

It won't make a heck of a lot of
difference what aunt Grace thinks.

I think your father is a darling.

Oh, he is solid.
The best father I ever had.

What else did they confide
in you about aunt Grace?

That is all they confided in me.

After that, they closed the door.

There is father.

Hello Daddy.
- Hello Boo, dear.

They are here.
- Oh, they are?

Hello folks.
- This is my father.

We've met before. Very nice
to see you again, Mr Brinker.

Likewise. Sorry I couldn't meet you.
I've been awful busy at the store.

This is Mr Jackson, father.
He's awfully nice for an older man.

Just call me Gramps.

Glad to know you Mr Jackson, I'm sure.

How are things shaping up
for the wedding, Mr Brinker?

Well.

To tell you the truth Miss Gilman I
guess Mrs Brinker is losing her nerve.

Mrs Brinker.

Hello, Miss Gilman.

And Jean.

I want you to meet Carey
Jackson, our feature writer.

Mrs Brinker and Jean.

Mrs Brinker. It's so nice to see you.
I would know you anywhere.

I've heard so much about you.

And this is Jean, of course.
You certainly are.

Well, why don't we all relax
and just get terribly friendly?.

Especially us.

Mr Jackson is getting
material for his story.

You will find he is extremely
curious about all of you.

Extremely.

I think it is all terribly exciting.

All you people should come
all the way to Indiana.

For just my little old wedding.

We wouldn't have missed your little old
wedding for a little old million bucks.

I wish you would tell us more about
how you go about this kind of a story.

You told me a lot the last time
you were here but since then ..

The relatives.

I was wondering if we
should go through with it.

But of course, Mrs Brinker.

You will be famous. Absolutely famous.

That is just the point.
We have always lived so quietly.

Next year at this time you will
have five million new friends.

That is how many people
subscribe to our magazine.

And some of them even read
what it says under the pictures.

Let's go upstairs and have a chat.

I'd like to wash up.

We're all invited out to supper.

Some of the neighbors are giving a
barn dance and a sleigh ride for us.

How thoughtful. Now you go ahead.

Carey dear.

Could I speak to you for a moment?
- Yes. Of course. Excuse me, will you.

Ouch!

Ha-ha.

A swell girl.

A wonderful sense of humor.

This is sort-of an occasion I reckon.

Are you a ..

A temperance man, Mr Jackson?

Temper ..?

Are you by any chance
asking me if I'll have a drink?

Yep.

Do you think you could stand one?
- Yep.

Good. I'll go and get it.

I have to keep it hid like
I saw in the movies once.

Mrs Brinker is temperance.

Tut-tut.

Boo.

Yes?

You are a very attractive young lady.

You shouldn't let Jean push you
out of sight the way she does.

You're smart.

Well, who am I to oppose
the opinion of thousands?

Family?
- Most of them.

Tell me.

How are all your uncles?

Fine. All except uncle Henry.

We don't talk about him.

What's the matter with uncle Henry?

A little soft in the head maybe?

Oh no. He is a democrat.

Oh.

Who is the ..

Who is the boy in the
photograph with you?

Oh, that is Bud.

A happy bridegroom, eh.

A nice guy?
- Wonderful.

When I was little he always
made the other kids wait for me.

Later he used to let me ride
on the handlebars of his bike.

Like in the picture.
- Hmm.

I gather Boo likes Bud?

Hmm.

Does he know?

It wouldn't make any difference.

Now you mustn't underestimate yourself.

No. I haven't got sock.
- What is "sock"?

Bounce.

Oh yes, I see.
- I haven't got any.

Jean has.

Yes indeedy.

Your sister flutters a mean eyelash.

It used to make Jim awfully mad.

Jim?
- Bud's brother.

Why should he care?

He and Jean were engaged once.

They were?

Well.

What happened?

Well.

Jim stayed in the army after the war.

Stationed at Chicago.

He didn't get home very often and ..

Jean likes attention.

I see.

So Jean took up with Bud?

Leaving Jim out in the cold and you too?

And the wedding is only a few days off
and you all live unhappily ever after.

Boy, what an angle.

Long noted for its uneven
course, love came to Indiana.

No exception. It.

Is that good?

What would happen if Jim came
home before the wedding?

It would likely cause
an awful lot of trouble.

Yes.

But I'd like it.

And I'd have something to write about.

Let me see, I could call the public
relations officer in Chicago.

And use the hallowed name of Home
Life to get Jim ordered back here.

Who is the public relations
officer there now?

Lind. Major Lind. Howard Lind.
He would do it alright.

That is wonderful.
Let's do it right now.

It's got everything.
A good twist, real drama.

And Jim would be home tomorrow morning.

And I would be out of a
job tomorrow afternoon.

Psst.

Excuse me.

Your father and I are going
to make beautiful music.

Long distance, please.

I want to speak to Major Howard Lind.

At the army base in Chicago.

Yes. Person to person.

Tell him ..

Tell him it is Carey Jackson calling.

I am his secretary.

I am to interview you and ..

This will probably help
loosen my tongue.

I have to keep the jug hid outside.

Mrs Brinker is very temperance.

She keeps putting the cork back in.
- Oh.

I gather it makes a difference?

It don't ferment if
you keep the cork in.

What is it?
- Cider.

Apple cider.

Oh. I see.

For a wild moment I felt you were going
to force a sip of brandy down my throat.

What is that clunking noise?

Ice.

Inside.

I not only keep the cork out.

I let it freeze a little too.

Yes, sir.

You devil.

Here.

This will put hair on your chest.

I don't suppose there's a place downtown
where they haven't heard of temperance?

I had hoped.

I guess it is a little strong.

That freezing don't
leave much but alcohol.

Don't light any matches.

Apples.

Just plain apples.

I have bitten into many
an apple but that is ..

The first time I've ever
had one snap back at me.

Tell me .. are you happy?

I don't know. I guess so.

A bride is too busy to be happy.

Why did you ask that?

It is one of my best questions.

Well.

Anyway, I am not lonely anymore.

And I am glad that I am
going to get married.

What is this about being lonely?
I wouldn't think you were the type.

I was last summer.

There was nobody left in town.

There was nothing to do.

Golly, I was lonely.

Then Bud came along?

And I grabbed him.

Well I suppose that is the best
way to get what you want.

Oh, it is the only way with men.

But I don't have to tell you that.

No.

You don't have to tell me that.

Jean.

As a person I hope you are not
making a mistake marrying Bud.

But, as a cold-blooded editor
with a deadline to meet.

I wouldn't be inclined to care if
it were Frankenstein's monster.

Why haven't you ever married?

Surely, there were men
who interested you?

Only one.

And that was a long time ago.

Why didn't you marry him?
- Mostly because I wasn't asked.

Why didn't you ask him?

Boo, really.

You were listening again.

It's the only way I ever hear anything.

Anything I can get you?

Thank you no, dear.
- I think I will change.

Did you press my red dress?

Yes, it is on my bed. And remember you
promised to do my hair in exchange.

Was it Mr Jackson?

Who is interviewing who around here?

I am supposed to ask the questions.

Boo, may I leave my things here?

Certainly. I'll hang
them up in the closet.

Thank you.

Well, are you excited about the wedding?

I think it stinks.

You do? Why?

I don't think I will tell you.

You are being very cryptic, Boo.

Don't you like me?

Oh yes. Very much.

You are what I want to be.

You are so sure of yourself.

I am?

And you are chick. But deff.

You look like one of those
ads in the magazines.

You know .. chick.

Me? I send away for the patterns and ..

Make the dresses exactly
the way they say but ..

Something happens when I get though.

I guess it is me.

Not chick?

Carey and your father seem
to be getting along famously.

Daddy froze it again.

Hmm?

Nothing.

Miss Gilman.

Linda.

Linda.

If you wanted a man, what would you do?

I think I would grab him.

Just like your sister.

You would?

But deff.

Boo. I will do your hair now.

Thanks, Linda.

We had a very interesting conversation.

Did we? I didn't understand
it all but I'm glad you did.

[ Doorbell ]

Hello Mrs Mitchell.

Hello Brian.
- Hiya Boo.

Mummy.

They're here.

Yes, dear.

Hello, Mrs Brinker.
- Hiya, Bud.

Hello dear.

Miss Gilman.
- Hello Bud.

Evening, Mrs Mitchell.

Hiya, bride.

Stop that. It is nearly Sunday.

Where is your father?

He's in the kitchen with Mr Jackson.

Whitman.

Whitman!

Yes, dear. We'll be right there.

Now Mr Jackson, speak to me.

Say something.

A man's best friend is the apple.

Very good.

Now listen very carefully.

Can you hear me?
- Hmm.

We are going to a barn dance and
we are going to meet some people.

And we are going to be as sober as
an Indianapolis lawyer, aren't we.

Whitman!

Yes, dear.

Or else Mrs Brinker will nail
my hide to the barn door.

Darn right she will.

Now, can you walk?

The other way.

Carey, this is Bud Mitchell
and his mother.

I have been thrown away.

Feeling better?

Oh.

It is you.

I think.

Yes it is I, your employer.

What is all this?

We're on our way home
from the barn dance.

Dead?

Far from it.

Where are we going?

We are their chaperones.

They get off at 3-Mile Creek.

Then we can go home.

Who is my little friend?

You were in the hog-calling contest.

Me?

What did I do with a
hog when it got there?

I never called a hog in my life.

You won.

First prize.

Hey, what's the matter with you?
What do you want?

I think somehow he's got the
impression you are his mother.

3-Mile Creek.

Whoa.

Don't forget. You promised, Carey.

No.

I did?

Sure.

Hey.

Who's that?

Sally.

Goodnight, honey.

Goodnight, Sally.

See here, Jackson.
- What?

Words fail me.
- Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

I have got something for you.

Do something with that, will you.

Giddy-up.

Giddy-up.

I ..

I must have had a wonderful time.

Wonderful.

Just what kind of a
wonderful time did I have?

Wonderful.

One by one you promised every girl in
Crestville High to help do her homework.

Oh.

It seems you are an
expert on multiplication.

And then?

And then you .. went to sleep.

Not a moment too soon.

I am sorry.

You needn't be.

You are very nice when you are asleep.

Very young and very innocent.

It is astonishing.

You know, I think you are mellowing.

Never let it be said that I didn't
take advantage of an opportunity.

Can I hope you with your homework?

Have you ever walked
home from a sleigh ride?

Well, I advise against it.

It is cold out there and the
woods are teeming with wolves.

And so is the sleigh.

Not like out there.
Huge slavering monsters.

Slavering?

About twelve feet high.

Each.

That settles it then.
I am too young to die.

You are very comfortable.

Like an old shoe.

In certain quarters I am referred
to exclusively as "old shoe Jackson".

You know, I'm beginning
to like Crestville.

And the Brinkers.

Especially the Brinkers.

They are a nice family.

Permanent.

They make you feel that they are
still going to be there tomorrow.

You know.

I could settle down.

I could work in New York. I can trade in
my portable typewriter for a desk model.

I could even grow roses on
Sunday if that's what you want.

Could you ..

Really?

No.

As for me.

I guess I'd look pretty silly.

Following you all over
Europe carrying the suitcases.

A respectful two paces behind and ..

Speaking only when spoken to.

We have what I believe is
referred to as a problem.

Let's nor make it a problem.
Let's not even talk about it.

Why not?

You would be heading for Berlin again.

And I would miss you so.

Linda.

Linda Gilman is not a woman.

Ha!

Morning.

Are you alright?

Uhuh.

You are just in time.
How do you spell "idyllic"?

Do you want me to measure
these curtains now?

Why don't you do the
living-room first, Mrs Lace.

I did.

We are .. making new drapes.

That's nice.

This is the material we're going to use.

Do you like it?

Oh yes, I like it. It is ..

Nice and soft.

Maybe you would like it a little gayer?

No, no. I like that. It's great.

I am glad you like it.
- I am glad you are glad.

Thank you.

How is the story going?

Alright.

Too many characters I think.

Do you mind if I read
over your shoulder?

Not at all.

I beg your pardon.
- No harm done.

That is a nice story.

Real nice.

I like it.

Isn't it almost lunchtime?
I'm getting kind-of hungry.

Mrs Lace, are you sure you got the right
dimensions for the living room curtains?

Alight, Miss Gilman.
I will measure them again.

But I have got to finish in here.

So I wish you would call me as soon
as you are through smooching.

[ Doorbell ]

It is the gang.

[ Doorbell ]

Greetings everybody.
- Greetings, madam manager.

Have a good trip?
- No. We all had issues.

Linda, you are trying us to the very
bottom of our eager little souls.

Why didn't I keep on
with my violin lessons.

This is a real McKinley stinker.

Come on. Let's get started.
We have lots to do.

Paula and Rosemary.
This is Boo, the bride's sister.

I am sure she won't mind if you
leave your things in her room.

I'll show you.

And Paula. Better get started with
Mrs Brinker. I'll be right up.

Now Scott, take down the icicles ..

Before you take your "before" pictures
in the bay window in the solarium.

It is June.
- Ha.

Now we need some Hollyhocks.

Mr Porter, we need a florist.

Hmm.

And I don't see why you can't start to
get the living room ready to be painted.

Hmm.

If you can find a free moment.

We might have a Taffy Pull.

Another five-day massage.

I will have muscles like a stevedore.

Have you ever been massaged, Mrs B?

Well, brace yourself.

We have work to do.

Linda.

Hi.

Want some jasmine tea?

What kind of jasmine tea?

Rum.

No thanks. I am temperance.

I am supposed to teach Mrs Brinker
how to make a cheese souffl? ..

And other goodies on this?

A locomotive boiler.

This is not ..

This is no place for a cook.
What you need is Casey Jones.

One false move and we'll all be
chuffing back to Indianapolis.

Do the best you can.

When you finish here, come in the living
room and help me cut the sofa in half.

Hello.

Could I borrow Jean for an interview?
I need some vital statistics.

You know.
- I know.

Paula will do all the
necessary measuring.

Okay, I am no good. I'll kill myself.

Are you satisfied?

I will see if she has finished her bath.

Tell her not to fuss for little old me.
She can come down just as she is.

Just for that, you stay
after school today.

Yes, teacher.

[ Doorbell ]

Yep? Who are you?

Who are you?

No. I asked first.

I am Jim Mitchell. I've got orders
to report here to a mister ..

You said your name was?

Jim Mitchell. I've orders to come here.
It is about my brother's wedding.

We are not at home.

There is nobody at home. Everybody has
moved. They've gone. Years ago. Hoboken.

Hoboken. Hoboken, New Jersey.

Go there. Go anywhere.

Boo.

Boo!

Boo.

Come down where you are ready, Jean.

Ouch!

Ouch!

Ow!

Oh.

Really, Mrs B.

If we're going to get any place in five
days you've simply got to stop rippling.

Go away.

Go away. Smallpox.

Bubonic plague.

They are all dead here.

Leave us with our sorrow.

Ouch!

Ouch!

Paula is taking some
weight off Mrs Brinker.

What with, a hacksaw?

Who is that?

A peddler. A persistent type.

I told him we didn't want any.

He looks like an army man.
What is he selling?

Surplus airplanes.

Well, who are you?

I have got orders to report here to a
Mr Jackson of Home Life magazine.

This is Mr Jackson.
- How do you do.

I am Jim Mitchell. I have been
ordered here for the wedding.

You must be Bud's brother.
How do you do? I am Linda Gilman.

Why, this is wonderful.
- Yes.

The wedding would not be
complete without you. - Linda.

The family wouldn't be complete without
you. Your family and the Brinkers.

Miss Gilman, I've been deliberately
trying to avoid being home.

Linda.

It is about .. Jim and Jean.

What about them, Carey?
- Jean.

Hello, Jim.

What are you doing here?

I am home.

You are?
- Yeah.

But I thought you were still in Chicago.
- No, no. I am home.

They were engaged once.

Carey.

Well, it seemed like a good
idea at the time but I ..

I dropped it I thought.

I knew you'd think of
something like this.

I'm complaining about
that hob. I need a saw.

Have you seen a saw?
I'll look in the kitchen again.

It's new.
- What?

The uniform.

I like it.

It is so nice you could get
here in time for the wedding.

They make such a charming couple.

Who?

Your brother. And Jean.

There's going to be a wedding. Remember?

They're in love and they
are going to be married.

Or I will be buried where I fall.

Oh. Sure.

I almost forgot.

Only I've thought about it enough.

Well, I hope you'll be very happy.

I am already.

I'm delighted to see that you are both
civilised intelligent young people.

You needn't worry, Miss Gilman.

I'm going to be very happy with Bud.

He appreciates me.
He wouldn't go off and leave me.

If I told you once I've told
you a thousand times.

I stayed in the army to finish
my engineering course.

That's all.
- So finish it!

If you think I'll wait until I'm
an old maid to get married ..

You're very much mistaken.

That's the kind of nasty
talk we like to hear.

Listen Mr Jackson, this is pretty rough.

If you don't mind I will visit my family
and stay away until the wedding is over.

Anything, old man. Anything you say.

So long, Miss Gilman.

Goodbye, Jean.

For a moment there I ..

I thought we were in trouble.
About our story, I mean.

My whole life flashed before my eyes.

I can see myself lying
prostrate at your feet.

Struck down by a blunt
instrument in your lovely hand.

However, it's all over now.
No harm done.

Jim! Jim, wait for me.

No harm done?

The whole June issue of Home Life
just went flying out that door.

Well, what do you want me to do? Throw
myself off the top of a brandy bottle?

You had no right to bring him here.

Everything was going so well.
- Now wait a minute.

Before you flip your lid there
is another angle to this.

Angle?

That's all you think about.

I have five million readers waiting
for the wedding of Jean and Bud.

Suddenly, all I have left is an angle.

What will you do?

Try and persuade those
two to be sensible.

And I had better succeed.

If you know what I mean.

I know what you mean.

Sir.

Boo.

Boo!

I know you are around here someplace.

You are around here somewhere.

It will be too good to miss.

Hello.

Come here, Boo.

The room looks bigger with the furniture
moved doesn't it, Mr Jackson.

Uhuh.

I am sorry, Mr Jackson.

It was me who called Major Lind.

I mean it was I.
- I didn't think it was your mother.

I didn't know it was
going to be this bad.

You don't know how bad it really is.

Stop it!

Found it.

Found it.

Obviously this is hurting you a great
deal more than it is hurting me.

The florist couldn't get any hollyhocks.

Will cornstalks do?
- Thank you.

I could have sworn this was my house.

[ Doorbell ]

Carey?
- No.

Well, I got these things down.
What do you want to do with 'em?

Oh, we'll think of something later.

Why haven't we heard from Carey?

He is probably dead.

Why don't you turn your motor
off for a while, Madam Editor?

You've been going like this for two days
now. Ever since the kids walked out.

I never should have sent Carey. I should
have kept on looking for them myself.

No word from Mr Brinker either?

Doesn't he know the wedding is tomorrow?

He's not nearly finished
with the painting.

And no word from the children?

Nobody has seen hide nor hair of either
of them since the day before yesterday.

Looks like they just
upped and disappeared.

You wouldn't think it
was possible in Indiana.

[ Telephone ]

Brinker residence.

Wrong number.

Work and worry have
taken their toll on me.

Everybody in town was in the store
today to find out what was going on.

Come on out to the kitchen. I'll give
you some of my special jasmine tea.

Rosemary.

Darling, if you think I can
do without my jasmine ..

While we convert from McKinley to
Truman you are out of your socket.

You haven't said anything to your
mother about Jean, have you?

Well, please don't until
we hear from Carey.

My lips are sealed.

Come in.

My, how thin we are getting.

If only I could have a cup of
tea or even a glass of water.

Now darling, we spent
all day drying you out.

You don't want to spoil
everything, do you?

Well let me get down at least.

I had better take some
of the pins out first.

Is everything going
alright, Miss Gilman?

We've nearly finished with the house.

I heard them sawing and pounding.

They didn't really take off
the front porch, did they?

It's not as bad as that.

We just took away some
of the scroll work.

I'm glad.

There is only thing I
wouldn't want touched.

Ouch!
- Sorry.

I lost my head.

Mrs Brinker, if there is anything you're
particular about we'll be careful of it.

It's that marble bust in the
living room. Thank you, dear.

Oh? The bust of Julius Caesar.

Yes.

It was a wedding present.

Miss Gilman.

You didn't throw it out did you?

I don't think so, Mrs Brinker.

But I will make sure.

Try one of these.

What are they?
- Shrimp.

Oh.

I didn't recognise them
with their pants on.

Good.

I think I will have some jasmine myself.

Madam Editor is turning out to be human.

Your wife looks very chic, Mr Brinker.

Very.

I don't care if she looks chic or not.
I'm just happy she's stopped screaming.

By the way, Rosemary. Mrs Brinker
wanted me to ask you something.

She is a little worried about her bust.

You didn't throw it out, did you?

I don't think so.

What did I do with it?

I know. I put it out in the garage.

Do you think it is safe?

Who would steal it?

What is it doing out on the garage?

I am going to paint it.

You are?

I thought I would paint it black.
It will be very effective that way.

Yes. I can see where it would be.

I might even drape a rich gold
turban on it. What do you think?

No. Perhaps you had better not.

It is pretty battered but it seems to
have a certain sentimental value.

[ Doorbell ]

Did you find them?

They are in Indianapolis.

What are they doing there?

Well, the last time I saw
them they were necking.

All my children are passionate.

Did they come back with you?

Why didn't you stay with them?

I felt out of place on a honeymoon.

Honeymoon?

They're married.

That does it.

Mr Brinker.

Jean wanted me to tell you that
she was sorry it was this way but ..

She said you would understand.

It has always been Jim.

I'd better tell Mrs Brinker.

She wanted you to tell Bud.

We will be leaving tomorrow afternoon.

I want the house finished by then.

We are not going through with the story?

There isn't any story now. Obviously.

We'll do quickie in New York but
we can't leave this place in a mess.

Wait a minute before you give up.
- Scott, pack all our things.

And Paula.

Tell Mrs Brinker she can relax.

May I speak to Bud please?

I'd like to talk to you.

Yes. I thought you would.

Ah.

If you can work it into
the conversation ..

Find out what I am
supposed to do with these.

Linda, don't give up your story yet.
I started this for a particular reason.

I will try to be very
patient with you, Carey.

There's no reason for us ..
- I'm not angry.

Will you please stop interrupting me.

Don't you think you're taking
this a little too seriously?

Seriously? I am two days
away from my deadline.

We have plated up six pages of
pictures, a thousand words of copy.

Yet here I am without a story.

You've the best story of your life right
here. A real story about human beings.

And it isn't finished yet.
- It is as far as I am concerned.

The only story I wanted was
young love, simple and pleasant.

What you really wanted was
another Never-never land epic.

What is wrong with telling
the truth occasionally?

Things don't always
turn out for the best.

Take us for example.

I refuse to discuss the
situation on a personal basis.

Since there is a personal basis I think
it's the only way we can discuss it.

I will not argue with you, Carey.
- Alright.

If you're girding up your loins to fire
me go ahead and get it over with.

That is your usual reaction
to a crisis, isn't it.

Simply walk away and let someone
else clean up the mess you've made.

I'm just want to get out of this labor
versus management relationship of ours.

Every time I get
affectionate with you ..

I feel as though I were snuggling
up to the Taft?Hartley bill.

Well, you won't be
troubled by it any longer.

You are fired.

Okay.

Now that the job is out of
the way we can get personal.

What about us?

Everything is finished here, Carey.

Including us.

Very easy for you, isn't it.

A little soft music, a kiss or two.

A wave of the hand and ..

Exit Carey Jackson.

I feel so sorry for you.

You are so sweet and so patient
and so utterly dependable.

And here I am being cruel to
you under the flimsy pretext ..

That you have just ruined
everything we've done here.

Don't give me that.

You're not firing me because Jean ..

Ran off with a man she should
have married in the first place.

But because you're madly in love with
me. To you that's a sign of weakness.

You're incredible. Utterly incredible!
First up on a pinnacle of masculine ego.

Looking down at poor, weak
defenceless females and pitying them.

Because they don't have beards.
- With a beard, I wouldn't look at you.

Very amusing, very amusing and a typical
male reaction to intellectual defeat.

Me, intellectually defeated?
- I've run in to the attitude before.

Every woman does the minute she
starts to make a career for herself.

"Get back to the kitchen,
mother. It is a man's world."

All I want to do is find out
where I stand with you ..

And all of a sudden I'm knee deep in
the battle of the sexes. What is this?

Right from the beginning you've
refused to follow instructions ..

Because I'm a woman and
not to be taken seriously.

This whole trip has been one
big hilarious joke to you.

Laughing gaily while you deliberately
ruined the story we set out to do.

Yes? You are wrong.

You're wrong all the way down the line.

You've got a darned good story here
only you are so mad you can't see it.

Maybe I have been a little bit
flippant but that is the way I am.

I can't go round bleeding from every
pore because things don't go just right.

There's always Berlin, isn't there?

Linda, if I'd wanted to run out I could
have done it the first day I came back.

I only took this job because,
poor deluded man that I am ..

It meant a great deal to
me to be near you again.

You have changed.

Whatever else is wrong with
you, you used to be honest.

I came back looking for you.

The next time you will look for me.

Don't wait too long.

I'll be leaving tomorrow.

Why not leave today?

Do me a favor, Boo.

Don't ever be a woman.

Mr Jackson.
- What?

Are you still mad at me?

Don't worry about me.

I'm not worried about you.

It's what I have done to Bud.

Did you call him?

He is coming over.

Did you tell him about Jean?

What did he say?

He said:

Ha!

It evidently wasn't
much of a blow to him.

Oh, it was.

I can tell from the way he said it.

He is going to kill himself.

I doubt it.

You are really in love
with Bud, aren't you.

How does he feel about it?
- He doesn't like me.

What makes you so sure?

I can tell.
- How?

The way he breathes.

I don't get it.

When he is around Jean.

He always breathes like this.

When he is around me ..

As far as I can tell ..

He doesn't breathe at all.

Well .. that is because he doesn't ..

Really think of you as
an attractive woman.

Why not?

I haven't the faintest idea.

If we could only make him jealous.

If we could make him
think that somebody ..

Me for instance, was
madly in love with you.

You know, that might work.

If only you had ..

What, Mr Jackson?
- Sock.

Those sweaters are ruining your life.

Haven't you got something more .. more?

Look, I'll you what we'll do.

You go upstairs and tell Paula ..

To give you that honeymoon dress
that you were making for Jean.

Tell her to fit it to you.

But I can't. Bud is coming over.
- That is the point.

Get going.

Well, well, well, it's you, so it is.

Come in, come in. Sit down.

Here.

That's it. Have a cigar.

No thanks.
- No?

I am sorry about all that has happened.

But you are a man of
the world, aren't you?

Who me?

Sure.
- I thought so.

The minute I saw you I said there ..

Is a man, of the world.

You did?

And naturally, when all this happened,
I knew you would take it well.

I am trying, Mr Jackson.

Stout fellow.

I ..

I am glad we could get
together this way .. Mitchell.

I wanted to ask your
advice about something.

Yeah?

It is about Boo.

Who?

Boo.

Do you think she could be
interested in a man like me?

Huh?

I refer to marriage of course.

Boo?

Since I have been here I have
become very fond of her.

Boo?

I must say I admire your ability
to carry on a conversation ..

With just a few simple words.

Well, a lot has happened
to me today, Mr Jackson.

Whenever I get used to the idea of
something, then something else happens.

I just can't seem to catch up.

I've been twenty minutes late all day.

Let me get this straight.

You want to marry Boo?

If she will have me.

But you are too old for her.

I am?

She is just a kid.
- Oh.

But Boo is blossoming.

She has become a very attractive woman.

I don't know whether you've noticed.

That isn't the point.
You don't think of boo as a wife.

I do. I can see her in a
wedding dress right now.

The vision is fading a trifle.

Boo getting married.
That I would like to see.

I am trying to arrange it.

Boo. How nice you look.

Thank you.

Yes. Swell.

Bud, I can't you how sorry I am ..

About Jean.

Well, forget it.

You have such a noble character.

Hasn't he, Mr Jackson?

He is absolutely crawling with nobility.

That dress is exquisite.

And so are you.

Well, Mr Jackson ..

You are the only man I know
that treats me like a woman.

That is because I think you have
the makings of a first-class wife.

Hey!

You'll be growing up soon.

Perhaps by then I'll be grown up myself.
You and I ought to get together.

Enough of that, Jackson.
- What's on your mind, Mitchell?

Get your hands off her.
She's not your kind of girl, Jackson.

So interesting.
Whose kind of girl is she?

I watched out for her ever since she
could walk. She doesn't need you.

It's still a free country, isn't it?
Any boy can grow up to be president.

I'm warning you, Jackson.

It's all yours, Brinker.

What has been going on
with you and him anyhow?

Does your father know a man practically
old enough to be your mother ..

Is making passes at you?

Mr Jackson is awfully nice.

He says the most exciting things.

I love to hear him talk.

You can get into an awful lot of
trouble listening to a guy talk.

There is something about
the way he treats me.

He makes me feel .. beautiful.

Well.

How do I treat you?

You are nice to me, Bud.
But it isn't the same.

You act more like .. like a brother.

Than Mr Jackson does.

Yeah. I'll bet I do.

You listen to me Book Brinker.

I don't like what's happened around here
and I don't the folk from the magazine.

Except maybe that lady that
keeps handing you things to eat.

What have you been doing to your house?

Fixing it.

Yeah, I'll say they fixed it.
But what for?

It is a McKinley stinker.

It is?

I thought it was kinda nice.

Can I sit down?

If you desire.

You know, you talk funny.

And you look different.

I do?

I mean .. do I?

Yeah. A little bit as though you ..

Kind of ..

You sure do.

You are sweet.

I don't know what it is.

I think you're blossoming.

That's it. You are blossoming.

You are becoming a very attractive girl.

I am?

Excuse me.

There is something in the
garage I have got to see.

Were you going to say something?

No.

I suppose ..?
- Is there something ..?

What were you going to say?

You know that old red jalopy I fixed
up to give Jean for a wedding present?

Yes.

I sure fixed it, didn't I?

You always were clever
about things like that.

I don't know what I'd do
without you to depend on.

What is the matter, your back tired?

Boo, about that jalopy.

Would you like it?

You mean you would give it to me?
- Do you want it?

Well, of course I do.
More than anything in the world.

It is yours.

How am I treating you now?
- Very much better.

Do you like me as much as Mr Jackson?

More.

Huh?

I guess I always have.

You are so strong.

I love strong men. They are so ..

So strong.

Boo.

Would you take me along with the jalopy?

Huh?

I mean would you marry me, Boo?
Now. Right away.

Please don't turn me down. I know
I am not much but I'm all I've got.

We've always gotten on so
well together and everything.

You probably wouldn't even
think of it after Jean and all.

I don't blame you for saying no.
- Who said "no"?

You mean ..?

Of course I'll marry you. I've been
trying to say so for five minutes.

Swell.

Swell.

Aren't you going to do anything?

What?

Well .. kiss me?

Are you sure you wouldn't mind?

Well if I do, overpower me.

What goes on here?

We are going to get married.

Sure, right away. If other people
can get married so can other people.

Married?

Married.

You are?

You are sure?

You won't change your minds?

Stay here. Don't go away.

For heaven sakes don't .. don't move.

Paula!

Scott.

Rosemary, come here quickly.

Yes?

Scott, unpack everything.

Paula and Rosemary, you'll
help me tell Mrs Brinker.

What's up?

The wedding will take place right on
schedule except that the bride is Boo.

Who is the luck man?
Not that it matters.

Behold. The bridegroom cometh.

Huh?

It was Julius.

Oh, was it?

Quite a relief.

What is going on?

I think there is going to be another
wedding in your family, Mr Brinker.

Bud just proposed to Boo.

Carey, we are going
through with our plans.

There is going to be
a wedding after all.

Bud is going to marry Boo.

Hmm.

A good idea.

Surprised?

"Astounded" is the word
I am searching for.

We can go back to work then.

But you fired me.

I am un-firing you.
- Why?

For heaven's sakes Carey.

We have a wedding to run off and
not very much time to do it in.

I can't get another
writer at this late date.

Here is some fresh copy for you.
Maybe you will find it interesting.

None of that is any good now.
We must have completely new material.

Now .. how Bud and Boo
grew up together. How they ..

They discovered each other only
because we came into their lives.

That is the lead. Sound alright?

Yes, very good.
- Get started on it right away.

It will be here when you want it.

Would you mind stepping aside please?
- Surely.

Now.

Give us about five more minutes.

You haven't seen Mr Jackson have you?

Last time I saw him he wasn't
feeling very good I reckon.

When I talked to him
all he said was: "hmm".

This must be a very happy
day for you, Mrs Mitchell.

Young man, please.

Everything set up for when
they come down the stairs?

Yes, I have got the graphic out there.
- Good.

They are ready upstairs.
- I am going right up.

I am so nervous.

Do I look alright?

Nellie, you haven't looked
as good since 1920.

You can tell I have lost weight.

You look like a new girl.

I feel kind of wicked having
you in my bedroom.

You.

[ Door knocks ]

Come in.

We are all ready downstairs.

Paula, would you bring Boo in.

I want to be sure that
you all know what to do.

We will take pictures all during the
ceremony but don't let that bother you.

Just .. be natural.

I feel weak.

I am so excited.

Now, Mrs Brinker.

When the music starts you go downstairs
slowly and take a seat near the piano.

And then you follow with Boo and
after the ceremony you join your wife.

Do I look alright?

Oh Boo, you look lovely.

I hope you will be very happy.

Thank you.

Paula, what is the matter?

Nothing that being eighteen
again wouldn't cure.

There is the music.

Your cue, Mrs Brinker.

Come along, darling.

Turn around, Boo.

When you and Bud are in the reception
line speak the names loudly and clearly.

So Carey can take them
down for the captions.

Mr Jackson? But he isn't here.

What do you mean?

He called me from New York this
morning to wish me good luck.

New York?

He left last night. Didn't you know?

But he can't have left.

Well this is hardly your problem.

Good luck, Boo.

Hold it, Madam Editor.

What is the matter?
- Carey has left.

He walked out.

Without finishing the story.
- Where did he go?

New York.

Let's face it.

We haven't any story.
- Oh, he left the copy.

That is the old stuff on Jean.

It is all about Boo.

He knew.

All the time.

Before I did.

This is the whole story.

He must have been finishing
it when I came in to tell him.

I don't get it.

Oh, it is very simple.

Terribly simple.

I have been an absolute idiot.

If you are looking for an argument
you had better pick another subject.

Well, I don't want to miss Boo's
wedding. I missed so many of my own.

Linda, you are crying.

I am not crying.

It is not dignified.

By all means, keep your
dignity, Madam Editor.

Personally, on these
cold wintry nights ..

I like a nice warm
back to put my feet on.

Barbara.

Wilt thou have this man
to be thy husband?

And wilt thou pledge thy troth to him.

In all love and honor.

In all duty and service.

In all faith and tenderness.

To live with him.

And cherish him.

According to the ordinance of God.

In the Holy bond of marriage?

I do.

Repeat after me.

I Bud, take thee Barbara.

I Bud, take thee Barbara.

To be my wedded wife.

To be my wedded wife.

And I do promise and covenant.

And I do promise and covenant.

Before God and these witnesses ..

To be thy loving ..

There.

That finishes it.

I hate wedding issues.

Especially this one.

You kids punch out.
I'll take it up to the boss.

Any idea what we'll
do for the July issue?

Something rare, rich and novel.

Probably with firecrackers in it.

The same writer?

Ha!

By the way, have you heard from him?

He called my office this afternoon.

What was he calling about?

His check.

Goodnight.

Goodnight.

He is in I presume?
- Yeah, but he ..

I don't know why they
call this a private office.

And what is untidy object?

The dummy for the June issue.

Carlton, you have three months
to find a new editor for Home Life.

Resigning?

Well .. if you have had a better offer.

No, nothing like that.
It is just that I am ..

I am tired of being a brick
wall covered with roses.

From now on it's lavender and
old lace for Linda Gilman.

With slippers and a pipe
for Carey Jackson?

Hmm.

If I can find him.

I take it he is not aware of
the bliss in store for him?

No.

Have you seen him?
- Uhuh.

Has he been in?
- Constantly.

Personally, I think he's just been
waiting for you to come back.

Why don't you ask him?

Why, you ..

You moldering Machiavelli.
- Now, Linda.

You malicious, scabrous ..
- You can't talk to me that way.

Your contract forbids this kind of talk.

Well. I have to run now.

I have a dinner engagement.
I know you will understand.

Well.

I am terribly sorry
Carey about everything.

I was all wrong about you.

You always have been.

I only have two more
issues to get out. I'll be ..

I will be free after that.

You need a rest.

I was thinking maybe next month we
could do the story of Jean and Jim.

The newlyweds in Chicago.

Have a good time.

No, I meant all of us.
- No. Not me.

You don't like Chicago?

Sure.

A great little town, Chicago.

Big.

Then you will stay with us?

I will be doing something else.
I am .. I am leaving.

As a matter of fact I just stopped
in to say goodbye to Carlton.

Oh.

It was a beautiful wedding.

Everyone was very happy.

Except me.

I cried.

I cried for a long time.

I hadn't done that in years.

Hay fever?

0h Carey, don't.

Don't what?

Don't make jokes.

Don't shut me out.
- Well, what do you expect?

You've been dangling me
like a yo-yo all week.

Go away Carey. Come back, Carey.

I never know whether you are
going to kiss me or kick me.

You want me to tell you?

Now don't get provocative.
We've been through all that.

Carey, you know very well
we are perfectly mated.

After all we are opposite sexes.

Perhaps you remember a conversation
we had about growing roses on Sunday ..

Versus carrying suitcases
all over Europe.

It has become a simple old-fashioned
question of who wears the pants.

And I would look pretty
silly without them.

Carey.

Berlin?

Afghanistan?

Baluchistan?

Madagascar?

-(t-g)-