"Это файл не формата srt. - /app/storage/subs/4/4/2/5/1957485244.gz" // resources/functions.php:79
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Вот содержимое файла - WEBVTT - Jönssonligan på Mallorca EngSubs\n\nSTYLE\n::cue {\nbackground-image: linear-gradient(to bottom, dimgray, lightgray);\ncolor: yellow;\n}\n\nNOTE\nTranslated by: JojoVV on opensubtitles.org\nThis translation is partially based on Maria Lindgren & Lena Winberg's Swedish subtitles;\nthat said I have adjusted the timing and added some lines that they omitted.\nSpeaking of timing, these subs should be fine if the audio and video starts 1.150 seconds in.\nAnyway: happy watching!\n\n00:00:01.080 --> 00:00:06.000\n- You think it'll work?\n- Sure, it’ll be a hit!\n\n00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:11.000\nThat'll be ten thousand pesetas.\nHarry, bring the sign up.\n\n00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:15.000\nIt's a splendid deal. All the\nSwedes'll wanna come here.\n\n00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:19.320\n- I'm the one who painted it!\n- Yeah, and it looks real snazzy. Now get down.\n\n00:00:19.320 --> 00:00:24.000\n- Hasta la vista, señor!\n- Adiós!\n\n00:00:25.380 --> 00:00:28.000\nRight, Harry, now let's go to the Playa…\n\n00:00:28.700 --> 00:00:30.000 line:70%\n[BAR(E) UPPER BODY]\n\n00:00:29.960 --> 00:00:34.512\nBuy some cactus spirits!\n\n00:00:34.680 --> 00:00:41.280\n"Harry's life elixir"! 30 crowns a flask,\nor somewhere around a thousand pesetas.\n\nNOTE For whatever reason Vanheden keeps using a made-up nickname for pesetas in this movie. The translation ignores this for simplicity.\nAlso, for the curious, he and Harry have just written out "SUN STROKE" repeatedly on their parasol.\n\n00:00:41.440 --> 00:00:46.993\nOne sip for breakfast, fifteen for lunch,\nand you'll never forget Mallorca…\n\n00:00:47.160 --> 00:00:51.916\nOr remember it! The cactus seed extract\nalso improves your blood circulation!\n\n00:00:52.080 --> 00:00:56.996\nHarry! What are you two up to?\n\n00:00:57.160 --> 00:01:01.552\n- We're selling-\n- Selling us this perfume, are you?\n\n00:01:01.720 --> 00:01:05.600\n- Pérdon?\n- Oh, it's Pardon-perfume, you know.\n\n00:01:05.760 --> 00:01:09.879\n- It's got real cactus in it, you want some?\n- Ugh!\n\n00:01:10.040 --> 00:01:16.037\n- What kind of witch brew are you selling around here?\n- Come on, Doris, we're out of here.\n\n00:01:19.680 --> 00:01:22.750\nHaven’t you paid yet?\n\n00:01:22.750 --> 00:01:29.115\nWe can't - the waiter's offered a double-or-nothing bet.\nHe'll guess which cup the olive is hidden under.\n\n00:01:38.200 --> 00:01:41.200\nAh, I'll take this one.\n\n00:01:45.920 --> 00:01:49.596\n- Bravo!\n- {Thank you so much. Goodbye!}\n\n00:01:53.760 --> 00:01:57.900\n- Wow, it sure is refreshing to be here with everyone!\n- Well, <i>almost</i> everyone.\n\n00:01:57.900 --> 00:01:59.250\nWhy, what do you mean?\n\n00:01:59.250 --> 00:02:03.480\n- Well, Sickan…\n- Yeah! Wonder how he's doing in Sweden.\n\n00:02:03.640 --> 00:02:08.795\n- Ah, he- he's probably doing well, too.\n- As long as he takes care of my flat and waters the flowers.\n\n00:02:08.960 --> 00:02:12.636\nYes, he probably does. Don't you think so, Ragnar?\n\n00:02:24.080 --> 00:02:26.914\nWell, then…\n\n00:02:27.080 --> 00:02:35.352\nEverything's timed… And prepared,\ndown to the… Last detail.\n\n00:02:35.520 --> 00:02:42.869\nIt's an absolutely… <b>Perfect</b> heist.\n\n00:02:42.200 --> 00:02:47.912\nWe'll strike against the Ericsson Globe…\n\n00:02:49.480 --> 00:02:56.114\nThe night before Wednesday,\nexactly at 24:35 o'clock.\n\n00:02:57.400 --> 00:03:03.200\n<c.magenta>- That's brilliant, Sickan!</c>\n- "Charles-Ingvar"! … Thank you.\n\n00:03:03.200 --> 00:03:10.000\nI'll need a trapeze, four kittens,\none dried orange, and 16 suction cups.\n\n00:03:37.160 --> 00:03:41.473\nI'll answer it… It’s for me!\n\n00:03:43.040 --> 00:03:47.592\nNo way… CEO Wall-Enberg?\n\n00:03:51.120 --> 00:03:58.835\n- Er… May I come in?\n- Yes… Of course. Of course!\n\n00:03:59.000 --> 00:04:03.836\nIt was for me; you keep on working!\n\n00:04:10.480 --> 00:04:14.793\nSo… What is on your mind, Wall-Enberg?\n\n00:04:14.960 --> 00:04:18.795\nI wanted to discuss a mission.\n\n00:04:18.960 --> 00:04:23.193\n- I see… That’s unfortunate.\n- How so?\n\n00:04:23.360 --> 00:04:33.272\nWell, my schedule <i>is</i> packed for half a year. At least. Not a minute to spare…!\n\n00:04:35.600 --> 00:04:38.720\n- That's a shame.\n- "D'hommage."\n\n00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:42.797\nOtherwise I could have offered you\na task at a very high level, internationally speaking…\n\n00:04:42.960 --> 00:04:47.830\n- … And out of the country.\n- Where you believe <i>I</i> would be particularly helpful.\n\n00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:51.311\n- Precisely!\n- How unfortunate!\n\n00:04:52.920 --> 00:04:58.040\n… Well, while I'm here,\nmay I offer you some refreshments?\n\n00:04:58.200 --> 00:05:02.433\nOf course! Feel free. Sit! <i>No hard feelings</i>!\n\n00:05:03.600 --> 00:05:08.153\n<i>Faites vos jeux. Jolly Bob…</i>\n\n00:05:14.360 --> 00:05:17.353\nWould you like some caviar?\n\n00:05:18.920 --> 00:05:22.436\nEh-hem… Here you go.\n\n00:05:42.200 --> 00:05:45.910\nOut of the country, you said?\n\n00:05:46.080 --> 00:05:53.317\nRight… You see, I have some issues\nwith the police stationed by the borders…\n\n00:05:53.480 --> 00:05:57.269\nI'm not exactly unknown!\n\n00:06:05.840 --> 00:06:09.629\n- "Georg Billgren"?\n- Passed away ten years ago.\n\n00:06:09.800 --> 00:06:13.077\nThat's convenient.\n\n00:06:13.240 --> 00:06:17.154\n… And running reimbursements for you.\n\n00:06:19.280 --> 00:06:21.749\nCheers!\n\n00:06:43.160 --> 00:06:49.873\n- Mallorca…?\n- Yes. It's a shame that you're so busy, Mr. Jönsson-\n\n00:06:50.040 --> 00:06:57.755\nWELL, busy and busy… It’s a matter of priorities,\nin my business as well as yours!\n\n00:06:57.920 --> 00:07:00.754\nNaturally.\n\n00:07:02.680 --> 00:07:07.471\nAfter all, Mallorca is always Mallorca!\n\n00:07:07.640 --> 00:07:14.399\nA Moric dance! … However,\nwith some… British additions…\n\n00:07:17.920 --> 00:07:24.440\n- Anyway! What is the issue?\n- A Franz Jäger-safe in Palma.\n\n00:07:51.400 --> 00:07:55.679\n- Billgren?\n- But of course!\n\n00:08:03.750 --> 00:08:05.000\nThis way.\n\n00:08:30.200 --> 00:08:33.272\nThis safe belongs to\na Spanish-Polish cardinal…\n\n00:08:33.440 --> 00:08:36.035\n- … Bulka.\n- It's "Billgren".\n\n00:08:36.200 --> 00:08:41.450\nCardinal Bulka always participates in the daily ceremony at 22:00.\n\n00:08:41.450 --> 00:08:43.000\nThat’s when we strike!\n\n00:08:56.620 --> 00:09:00.430\n… And that's 18,7 in pesetas.\nDamn, you know how much that'll be?\n\n00:09:00.430 --> 00:09:03.500\n- Sickan!!\n- You seem out of it… You know he isn't here.\n\n00:09:03.500 --> 00:09:07.000\n- There, in that black car!\n- Where?\n\n00:09:45.480 --> 00:09:49.679\nStethoscope, talcum powder, gloves…\n\n00:09:49.840 --> 00:09:53.754\nChamois leather… Finnish.\n\n00:09:53.920 --> 00:10:01.874\nChamois leather from Finland…\nSo <i>sheep</i> it can't <i>finn</i>ish the job.\n\nNOTE The original pun was arguably even worse (said affectionately, of course), as they had to make up a conjugation for it to work.\n\n00:10:02.040 --> 00:10:07.638\n- 'sup Sickan, how's it going?\n- Hi, Sickan.\n\n00:10:07.800 --> 00:10:11.953\n- … Pardon?\n- ~Vamos a la Playa~ … You got a plan?\n\n00:10:12.120 --> 00:10:18.310\n- Do I know you gentlemen? Are we acquainted?\n- Look… It's me, Vanheden.\n\n00:10:18.480 --> 00:10:25.114\nAnd Harry! Dynamite-Harry!\n\n00:10:26.120 --> 00:10:34.673\nOh <b>right</b>, now it's all coming back to me…\nIt's the cousins… <i>Ragnar</i>! How are you?!\n\n00:10:34.840 --> 00:10:36.869\n- I'm doing well-\n- <b>So</b> glad to hear that.\n\n00:10:37.040 --> 00:10:41.593\nAnd your little girlfriend, what was her name again…?\n- Well, Doris has-\n\n00:10:41.600 --> 00:10:45.820\nRight, that's what she's called.\nAnd you're… Getting along?\n\n00:10:45.820 --> 00:10:49.830\n- Yeah, things are going real smooth, we're pushing signs-\n- "Pushing signs"…\n\n00:10:49.830 --> 00:10:54.749\n- Yes, I paint them and Ragn-\n- Oh that's <b>so</b> interesting. How <b>fascinating</b>.\n\n00:10:54.950 --> 00:10:58.680\nAnd it's going… Well?\n<b>So</b> glad to hear that.\n\n00:10:58.680 --> 00:11:01.832\n- Hey, Sickan…\n- Eh-hem, "Billgren".\n\n00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:07.632\n- Pillgren?\n- <u>B</u>illgren. My name is Georg Billgren.\n\n00:11:07.510 --> 00:11:09.350\nHe's working in Cognito, y'know.\n\n00:11:09.350 --> 00:11:11.320\n- It's called "Incognito".\n- Yeah, yeah.\n\n00:11:11.320 --> 00:11:14.392\n- Anyways, what's going on, Sickan?\n- Pardon?\n\n00:11:14.550 --> 00:11:17.450\nYeah - I mean, when do <i>we</i> get into the picture?\n\n00:11:17.900 --> 00:11:19.000\n<b><i>You?</i></b>\n\n00:11:22.300 --> 00:11:26.100\nI mean… When do we strike? You've got a plan, right?\n\n00:11:26.100 --> 00:11:28.650\nYou wouldn't be in Palma for a holiday, if I know you well enough…\n\n00:11:28.650 --> 00:11:32.300\nYou do not. You gentlemen must have misunderstood something.\n\n00:11:32.290 --> 00:11:34.780\n- We just want to help out!\n- "Help out"?!\n\n00:11:35.900 --> 00:11:38.850\nLast time you gentlemen wanted to "help out"…\n\n00:11:38.850 --> 00:11:49.760\n… Was when this little "stock market expert" put all of our winnings\nfrom our IKEA-heist in 22 000 Fermenta-stocks, then sold them for exactly-\n\n00:11:49.760 --> 00:11:53.000\n- nothing!\n- 58… Thing!\n\n00:11:53.000 --> 00:11:57.500\nI prefer working without any "help"… Have a good afternoon.\n\n00:13:45.800 --> 00:13:48.315\nTalc.\n\n00:13:52.200 --> 00:13:55.079\nGloves.\n\n00:14:06.640 --> 00:14:09.838\nStethoscope.\n\n00:14:14.560 --> 00:14:18.156\nChamois leather…\n\n00:15:27.680 --> 00:15:33.278\nCurare.\nAnaesthetic. Fast-acting.\n\n00:16:08.920 --> 00:16:11.355\nNext!\n\n00:16:12.200 --> 00:16:14.635\nNext!\n\n00:16:15.640 --> 00:16:17.791\nDone!\n\n00:16:17.960 --> 00:16:22.000\nSwap the passports and call the police.\n\n00:16:35.820 --> 00:16:41.300\n{Is this the police? \nCardinal Bulka! Get here quickly, please!}\n\n00:16:58.560 --> 00:17:02.000\nCome on, then, hurry up and get the key!\n\n00:17:04.300 --> 00:17:08.350\n- Uh, maybe he hasn't brought it?\n- That's right, maybe he forgot it in Stockholm.\n\n00:17:08.350 --> 00:17:11.200\nIt's pretty obvious he hasn't…\n\n00:17:11.200 --> 00:17:14.100\nJust hurry up, alright?\n\n00:17:17.500 --> 00:17:20.000\nAnd tell the "genius" I said hi!\n\n00:17:29.500 --> 00:17:31.500\n[Two minutes.}\n\n00:18:04.800 --> 00:18:08.500 \nHey, Billgren. How ya doin'?\n\n\n00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:14.356\n's nice and cool in here.\nThink they've got any nice champaigne?\n\n00:18:15.300 --> 00:18:16.500\n… What do you want?\n\n00:18:16.500 --> 00:18:21.000\nY'know, Doris would like the key to her block back. Those flowers need water and stuff…\n\n00:18:21.000 --> 00:18:24.520\nAnd if I got it right, you'll be tied up for a couple of yonks... Or more.\n\n00:18:27.150 --> 00:18:28.500\nUh-huh…\n\n00:18:29.800 --> 00:18:33.500\nYou should have stuck with your friends…\n\n00:18:34.200 --> 00:18:35.150\nUh-huh…\n\n00:18:35.150 --> 00:18:38.600\nShould've worked a bit closer to our level, you know what I mean?\n\n00:18:38.600 --> 00:18:40.800\nYes, I know…\n\n00:18:40.800 --> 00:18:44.350\n- I'm worthless without you.\n- Yup.\n\n00:18:44.520 --> 00:18:47.877\n- A twit.\n- Yeah.\n\n00:18:50.120 --> 00:18:54.000\nI fail at everything I do!\n\n00:18:54.500 --> 00.18:55.750\nYes.\n\n00:18:57.480 --> 00:19:01.713\n… Nooo… Not <i>everything,</i> right?\n\n00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:08.313\n- You're not completely worthless, Sickan.\n- Yes, I am!\n\n00:19:08.600 --> 00:19:11.000\nNo, you're not.\n\n00:19:11.750 --> 00:19:16.000\n- You're pretty good at plans, Sickan…\n- Yes. Very good, even.\n\n00:19:17.000 --> 00:19:18.250\nYou think so?\n\n00:19:19.200 --> 00:19:21.200\nYeah!\n\n00:19:20.750 --> 00:19:23.900\n- You're also very good!\n- We sure are.\n\n00:19:23.900 --> 00:19:28.000\nAnd Doris! Want us to tell her anything for you?\n\n00:19:29.260 --> 00:19:31.391\n- Doris?\n- Yeah…\n\n00:19:31.560 --> 00:19:37.477\nShould we tell her she's a wonderful\nhuman being? Would you like that?\n\n00:19:37.640 --> 00:19:41.793\n- Absolutely.\n- Then we will, Ragnar.\n\n00:19:44.680 --> 00:19:47.195\n- {Time's up.}\n- Right… Bye.\n\n00:19:48.360 --> 00:19:50.716\nGoodbye.\n\n00:19:58.800 --> 00:20:04.398\n- This ain't any good, Harry…\n- No…\n\n00:20:04.560 --> 00:20:08.759\n- He sure is useless sometimes, huh?\n- Yup…\n\n00:20:08.920 --> 00:20:12.857\n- But Sickan's always Sickan…!\n- Yeah…\n\n00:20:14.280 --> 00:20:19.435\nHey… I have an idea. Follow me!\n\n00:20:26.240 --> 00:20:28.039\nHi!\n\n00:20:31.400 --> 00:20:36.555\nJönsson is on Mallorca… But behind bars!\n\n00:20:48.080 --> 00:20:52.313\nBe careful now, Harry.\n\n00:20:53.760 --> 00:20:58.596\n- But do you think this'll work?\n- Sure thing! Sickan likes bread, y'know. Right?\n\n00:20:58.760 --> 00:21:01.673\nCome on!\n\n00:21:34.320 --> 00:21:39.475\n- Get that photo! It could be something for <i>Expressen</i>.\n- Or maybe KU.\n\nNOTE\nThe Express being one of the magazines with the highest readership in Sweden to this day.\nKU is an acronym for… A lot of different organisations, so I'm not sure which one he meant to bring up.\n\n00:21:43.720 --> 00:21:47.873\nGet on with it!\n\n00:21:48.040 --> 00:21:53.274\n- Oh, do you <i>really</i> need to use both of them?\nYes, when dealing with you!\n\n00:21:56.600 --> 00:22:00.150\n- {Thanks, colleagues.}\n- {Thank you.}\n\n00:22:16.040 --> 00:22:19.351\n- It's a special transfer.\n- Understood.\n\n00:22:24.880 --> 00:22:27.590\n"Detective Green, detective Green, to the information please…"\n\n00:22:27.760 --> 00:22:32.152\nDetective Green? Wait, that's me!\n\n00:22:33.880 --> 00:22:37.032\nWe'll grab a beer at the bar! … Follow me.\n\n00:22:42.200 --> 00:22:47.830\n{Thank you.} Cheers, Jönsson.\n\n00:23:26.720 --> 00:23:29.110\nAah - Lissabon, Lissabon!\n\n00:24:24.800 --> 00:24:28.714\nRight - here we've got Doris' empire: zone-therapy and burns!\n\n00:24:28.850 --> 00:24:31.500\n- Burns?!\n- Yeah, it's a solarium!\n\nNOTE Originally this was a pun that relied on the word "hembränt";\nwhile this usually refers to illegally brewed alcohol, it is a compound meaning "burned at home" - and Swedish uses the same words for a tan and an actual sun burn...\nIf only the solarium had been open by night the term "moonshine" would have worked perfectly as a replacement for the actual joke!\n\n00:24:31.500 --> 00:24:36.500\n- She's set for life here, y'know.\n- It's a real gold mine… And I painted the sign over there!\n\n00:24:37.000 --> 00:24:40.200\n- And where are you two staying?\n- Here…\n\n00:24:40.200 --> 00:24:43.000\n- … Right around the corner, that is.\n- This way!\n\n00:24:43.000 --> 00:24:46.000\nDoris doesn't want us to take up the clients' route.\n\n00:24:46.000 --> 00:24:49.000\n… And I've painted this wall, too!\n\n00:24:51.080 --> 00:24:55.879\nHere's the entrance! There you go.\n\n00:24:57.200 --> 00:24:59.000\nCome on, take a look…\n\n00:24:59.150 --> 00:25:04.150\nHere's a little invention of mine that belongs to the plant kingdom!\n\n00:25:04.580 --> 00:25:09.100\nThe cactus drops drip down - just like this…\n\n00:25:09.100 --> 00:25:14.000\nAnd then, <i>sim sala bim</i>…\nThat's how to brew "Harry's Sunstroke". Here you go!\n\n00:25:14.600 --> 00:25:16.910\nHave a taste!\n\n00:25:20.270 --> 00:25:28.200\nIt's strong!\n\n00:25:28.200 --> 00:25:31.000\n… Very!\n\n00:25:32.480 --> 00:25:37.953\nWhat, isn't that lad supposed to be serving time?\nD- did he escape?\n\n00:25:38.120 --> 00:25:42.478\n- Oh, not at all, the other way around!\n- How so?\n\n00:25:42.640 --> 00:25:45.633\n- They'd made a mistake.\n- That's a pity.\n\n00:25:46.530 --> 00:25:48.750\nThey thought he was someone else.\n\n00:25:48.750 --> 00:25:52.780\nAnd so he decided to come back here and mess things up. Right?\n\n00:25:52.780 --> 00:25:55.700\n- Even though everything was nice and quiet, Harry…\n- Yes…\n\n00:25:55.700 --> 00:25:59.800\nAnd now you'll be faffing about with all these maps and torches and God knows what…\n\n00:25:59.800 --> 00:26:03.370\n- And the flowers! Harry, who will water them?\n- Harry…\n\n00:26:03.370 --> 00:26:05.700\nWho'll take care of <i>my</i> apartment?\n\n00:26:05.700 --> 00:26:09.100\nHey, we've got some stuff to talk about with him. Y'know, we haven't seen him in friggin' ages.\n\n00:26:09.150 --> 00:26:14.076\n- Check it out, a client’s coming in!\n- There you go again…\n\n00:26:14.440 --> 00:26:20.077\n- Doris Karloff…\n- Uh-huh…\n\n00:26:20.240 --> 00:26:24.553\nC'mon, Sickan. Have a seat.\n\n00:26:29.440 --> 00:26:33.878\nI have been tricked. Kept in the dark.\n\n00:26:34.040 --> 00:26:41.152\nBeen treated like a seventh-grade twit.\nThey have exploited Charles-Ingvar Jönsson!\n\n00:26:41.320 --> 00:26:43.800\nAnd pulled me by the nose.\n\n00:26:43.800 --> 00:26:46.400\nYeah, that's not the first time…\n\n00:26:46.400 --> 00:26:49.500\nNo, but it'll be the last.\n\n00:26:49.500 --> 00:26:53.950\nThe police claims that nothing was stolen from Cardinal Bulka.\n\n00:26:53.950 --> 00:26:57.500\nBut I know that something is missing, and I know who took it!\n\n00:26:57.500 --> 00:26:58.760\nAnd who are they?\n\n00:26:58.760 --> 00:27:03.960\nTwo Swedes…\nOne is incredibly tall, and the other fairly short.\n\n00:27:04.420 --> 00:27:08.940\n- The tall one is… He- he is…\n- Muscly!\n\n00:27:08.940 --> 00:27:18.500\nYes. But the- the small… H- He, he has a bright hat.\nIt seems like they are working together.\n\n00:27:18.500 --> 00:27:21.500\n- The Lizard and Bro!\n- What?\n\n00:27:21.500 --> 00:27:23.900\n… Your brother?!\n\n00:27:24.250 --> 00:27:27.600\nN-… No, the Lizard's…\n\n00:27:27.600 --> 00:27:32.350\nYeah, I've seen them at the framer's, where they frame my paintings…\n\n00:27:32.350 --> 00:27:35.250\n- The Lizard and "Bro"?\n- Yes, and the framer's is over there.\n\n00:27:35.250 --> 00:27:39.000\nHarry! Would you help me out with something?\n\n00:27:47.000 --> 00:27:49.000\nHarry, sweetheart~?\n\n00:27:58.720 --> 00:28:01.394\nHarry, hang this up…\n\n00:28:01.560 --> 00:28:05.918\n- {I don’t recognise him.}\n- {Thank you.}\n\n00:28:12.760 --> 00:28:19.678\nYeah, I’ve spoken to them!\nNo, we won’t have any issues! Goodbye!\n\n00:28:19.840 --> 00:28:23.150\n- What'd they say?\n- Yeah, what would they have said?\n\n00:28:23.150 --> 00:28:26.120\nI told them it would take the Spaniard bureocrats a week to get the details sorted.\n\n00:28:26.120 --> 00:28:30.034\n- So we have one week to find him.\n- Let's grab that one-armed bandit!\n\n00:28:30.200 --> 00:28:35.514\nIt’s not like he can go anywhere without his passport…\nOK… Where do we begin?\n\n00:28:35.680 --> 00:28:42.120\nIf I know Jönsson well enough, he won’t settle for anything less than the most luxurious of hotels. And the French kitchen. The taxi's waiting!\n\n00:28:53.800 --> 00:28:57.032\nHere it is.\n\n00:28:59.600 --> 00:29:02.957\nThe lights are on.\n\n00:29:05.960 --> 00:29:09.431\nCome!\n\n00:29:40.680 --> 00:29:44.913\n- There they are.\n- Yeah: the Lizard and his brother.\n\n00:29:45.080 --> 00:29:47.800\nThe snitches…\n\n00:29:57.120 --> 00:30:00.477\nWhat are they doing?\n\n00:30:03.320 --> 00:30:05.551\nFollow me.\n\n00:30:15.800 --> 00:30:18.634\nThe torch!\n\n00:30:23.600 --> 00:30:28.959\n"Gertrud Germann, antiques…"\n\n00:30:29.120 --> 00:30:34.195\n- Vanheden, you'll have to pick this.\n- Y'know, that's a Spanish lock; not my area.\n\n00:30:34.360 --> 00:30:38.354\n- Let's blow it up!\n- Quiet!\n\n00:30:38.800 --> 00:30:46.389\nI have a plan…\nWe need to get the key.\n\n00:31:02.200 --> 00:31:06.274\n- That's Germann's antiques shop.\n- I'll get this done, Sickan!\n\n00:31:06.440 --> 00:31:10.957\n- The card?\n- No problem. It's all under control!\n\n00:31:39.360 --> 00:31:43.559\n- Exquisite pieces.\n- Thank you!\n\n00:31:43.720 --> 00:31:49.352\n- You speak Swedish?\n- Swedish, English, French…\n\n00:31:49.520 --> 00:31:55.869\n- My name is von Oben.\n- "Beauty expert"?\n\n00:31:56.040 --> 00:31:59.397\nMy salons lie in Paris and Rome…\n\n00:31:59.560 --> 00:32:04.316\nCurrently I am building a <i>petit salon</i> in Palma.\n\n00:32:04.480 --> 00:32:12.479\nFor that exclusive handful that\nunderstands that extra something.\n\n00:32:12.640 --> 00:32:18.511\nAnd I would belong to\nthat exclusive handful?\n\n00:32:18.680 --> 00:32:21.400\nDefinitely, Madame, according to my judgement.\n\n00:32:21.560 --> 00:32:28.911\nIt would be a great pleasure to give you a treatment for free.\nPurely as an introduction.\n\n00:32:29.080 --> 00:32:32.391\nAh, I don't know about that…\nBut <i>I</i> know, Madame.\n\n00:32:32.560 --> 00:32:38.158\n2 o'clock tomorrow, sharp.\nI don't think either of us will be disappointed.\n\n00:32:38.320 --> 00:32:44.669\n- That would be terribly exciting!\n- {See you soon, Madame…}\n\n00:32:47.320 --> 00:32:50.392\nNow we’ve gotta hurry.\n\n00:32:54.480 --> 00:32:58.759\n- Same price as usual?\n- Yes!\n\n00:32:58.920 --> 00:33:03.870\nThank you very much. See you on Thursday!\n\n00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:12.110\nWould you like a little help with the door?\nDon’t be sad, we’ll meet again soon.\n\n00:33:12.550 --> 00:33:15.000\nWould you look at that one! You just gotta fasten the bib a little and-\n\n00:33:15.000 --> 00:33:19.392\n- oh hi Doris! How's it going?\n- Just great. I'll take a break now!\n\n00:33:19.560 --> 00:33:24.840\n- Weren't you supposed to leave?\n- Yeah, it's 2 o'clock!\n\n00:33:25.000 --> 00:33:30.439\n- What about the exhibit?\n- Where they show the newest swimsuits at Playa Blanca?\n\n00:33:30.600 --> 00:33:36.756\n- Thanks Harry, I almost forgot about that!\n- That's what I thought…\n\n00:33:36.920 --> 00:33:43.554\n- Harry, knock it off. You could take the car.\n- I will!\n\n00:34:29.480 --> 00:34:33.269\nPick me up in half an hour.\n\n00:34:53.120 --> 00:34:56.033\nPoint B here. Over.\n\n00:34:56.200 --> 00:34:59.557\nPoint A here, over!\n\n00:34:59.720 --> 00:35:04.158\nThere's a Swedish yellow car with a sun on it,\ndriven by a good-looking woman. Trace it.\n\n00:35:04.320 --> 00:35:07.836\n- Understood!\n- Over and out.\n\n00:35:13.000 --> 00:35:16.600\n- What a tiny place!\n- <i>Oui, oui,</i> Palma is very small…\n\n00:35:16.600 --> 00:35:19.920\n… Not like Rome, that's big!\nThere the salon is like a great hall.\n\n00:35:19.920 --> 00:35:27.436\nThis is more of a- a small bedroom, if Miss Germann understands…\n\n00:35:33.600 --> 00:35:38.391\nMiss Germann… If you'd allow me?\n\n00:35:41.120 --> 00:35:46.514\nHenri, take out the ultrasound-massage.\n\n00:35:46.680 --> 00:35:53.996\n<i>Terribly</i> hard to find qualified personnel around here,\nbut you have to start somewhere!\n\n00:36:01.400 --> 00:36:07.158\n- Then we've started. Does that feel good, Miss Germann?\n- No…\n\n00:36:08.160 --> 00:36:11.073\n<i>Trés bien!</i> Then we’re on the right track.\n\n00:36:11.240 --> 00:36:17.191\n"One must suffer a little before the country is ours,"\nas Napoleon said.\n\n00:36:18.880 --> 00:36:24.638\n- The bag…\n- Pardon? You want a rag?\n\n00:36:24.800 --> 00:36:32.037\nNo! Where's my bag? It's so hot, I need a handkerchief…\n\n00:36:33.680 --> 00:36:38.672\n- Here you go!\n- Oh… Thanks.\n\n00:36:43.560 --> 00:36:47.918\nHarry? Open the windows.\n\n00:36:50.000 --> 00:36:55.758\nWell, Germann, let us continue.\nYou seem slightly tense here, I believe…\n\n00:37:11.320 --> 00:37:14.472\n{Very good!} That's it.\n\n00:37:14.640 --> 00:37:18.554\nIt’s going well!\n\n00:37:28.880 --> 00:37:34.319\nThere wasn’t much to choose from here. Let's see, uh...\n\n00:37:34.480 --> 00:37:39.635\nThat's enough. They've got French entrecotes <i>and</i> it's cheap! Let's get in.\n\n00:38:17.400 --> 00:38:20.438\nFollow me.\n\n00:38:56.940 --> 00:39:01.237\nI'll fix it.\n\n00:40:35.640 --> 00:40:39.429\nPerfect images.\n\n00:40:42.640 --> 00:40:47.112\nThis would be possible to accomplish.\n\n00:40:48.920 --> 00:40:53.517\n- Two millions for Bulka.\n- Two?!\n\n00:40:53.680 --> 00:40:58.630\n- The other 8 millions?\n- You'll receive them once phase 2 is over.\n\n00:40:58.800 --> 00:41:03.272\n- There is much left to do, isn't there?\n- But we thought-\n\n00:41:03.440 --> 00:41:08.993\n<b>Once phase 2 is over.</b>\nThat is all for tonight.\n\n00:41:09.160 --> 00:41:12.278\nThis way, gentlemen.\n\n00:41:27.480 --> 00:41:33.716\n- Now what do we do?\n- Phase 2.\n\n00:41:49.880 --> 00:41:55.877\nIt’s outside! You know, the yellow car with the sun?\n\n00:41:58.720 --> 00:42:03.317\nThere! Wh- what? It was right there…\n\n00:42:03.480 --> 00:42:08.874\nHeh, it’s the sangrian.\nI remember when I was your age…\n\n00:42:09.040 --> 00:42:12.078\n- PM 165 370.\n- Which one?\n\n00:42:12.240 --> 00:42:16.996\n- The car's number.\n- Good! Then we've got him.\n\n00:42:18.720 --> 00:42:23.875\nNo way! Seems like there’ll be another party in the Swedish colony, boys.\n\n00:42:24.040 --> 00:42:26.953\nThe finer parts, that is.\n\n00:42:27.120 --> 00:42:33.913\n"On Sunday we’ll celebrate \none of Palma’s better known international profiles.\n\n00:42:34.080 --> 00:42:39.872\n- "The Swedish antiques dealer, Gertrud Germán…"\n- "Germann"!\n\n00:42:40.040 --> 00:42:44.319\n"… Germann, who turns 60 years old.\n\n00:42:44.480 --> 00:42:51.910\n"Miss Germann is, among other things,\na conservator who studied\n\n00:42:52.080 --> 00:42:56.950\nat the famous institute… Pontager de Vernon-"\n\n00:42:57.120 --> 00:43:00.511\n- That's perfect!\n- How so?\n\n00:43:00.680 --> 00:43:06.391\nYeah, uh… Sickan bought a beret. A new one.\n\n00:43:06.560 --> 00:43:10.840\n- It's perfect for him!\n- You've sure picked a lively colour this time… "Coffee"?\n\n00:43:11.000 --> 00:43:14.630\n- No, not right now.\n- Yes please, gladly!\n\n00:43:15.960 --> 00:43:19.715\nYes please… Gladly.\n\n00:43:25.440 --> 00:43:29.195\nWe'll need a gift\nfor Miss Germann…\n\n00:43:48.880 --> 00:43:51.998\n- Hi! Congratulations!\n- Thank you so much!\n\n00:43:55.400 --> 00:44:00.794\n- Isn't it wonderful?\n- … What <i>is</i> it?\n\n00:44:00.960 --> 00:44:03.236\n{Welcome.}\n\n00:44:14.160 --> 00:44:18.154\n- Cheers!\n- Don't push it, Harriet!\n\n00:44:18.320 --> 00:44:21.392\n- You have to stay hydrated in this heat…\n- I'm tellin' ya, don't push it!\n\n00:44:21.560 --> 00:44:24.280\n- Darling!\n- Thank you for having us!\n\n00:44:27.440 --> 00:44:29.159\nDavid! You're sweet as li-\n\n00:44:34.360 --> 00:44:40.596\n- Dude, it's like an eagle's nest, y'know.\n- Yes… But it's nice!\n\n00:45:18.550 --> 00:45:20.500\n- We're done here now.\n- 'Aight.\n\n00:45:24.800 --> 00:45:26.600\n- Morgan!\n- Gertrud!\n\n00:45:26.600 --> 00:45:28.250\nYou <i>could</i> make it, after all!\n\n00:45:28.250 --> 00:45:29.830\n- All the best, Gertrud.\n- Thank you.\n\n00:45:32.460 --> 00:45:36.360\nAnd I have a little something for you that you may find very interesting…\n\n00:45:36.360 --> 00:45:39.000\nHow nice!\n\n00:45:48.940 --> 00:45:53.900\n- So you still feel right at home here in Palma?\n- Absolutely, it's a charming place.\n\n00:45:53.900 --> 00:45:57.650\n- … However, Morgan, this is actually Santa Ponza.\n- Ah, I see.\n\n\n00:45:57.680 --> 00:46:01.674\n- And you had no trouble getting here?\n- Everything went perfectly, thanks.\n\n00:46:06.160 --> 00:46:08.152\nWell, what do you think?\n\n00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:12.989\nGood… Very good.\n\n00:46:50.520 --> 00:46:53.957\nGood pictures…\n\n00:46:54.120 --> 00:46:58.512\nThey are professionals.\n\n00:46:58.680 --> 00:47:03.596\nMy client has already\nsecured 50 million dollars…\n\n00:47:03.760 --> 00:47:07.674\nProvided the operation goes off without a hitch.\n\n00:47:07.840 --> 00:47:11.516\nIt will.\n\n00:47:16.080 --> 00:47:20.757\n- Champagne?\n- Yes please.\n\n00:47:58.080 --> 00:48:03.519\n- Um, the ladies' room?\n- No, outside.\n\n00:48:22.440 --> 00:48:26.719\n- Hiya, Sickan.\n- Keep watch!\n\n00:48:38.720 --> 00:48:41.189\nShh!\n\n00:48:55.000 --> 00:48:58.994\n- Where'd he go?\n- Sickan?\n\n00:49:12.800 --> 00:49:15.290\n- Where'd he go?\n- He just disappeared!\n\n00:49:15.290 --> 00:49:16.500\nFollow me.\n\n00:49:17.930 --> 00:49:21.300\n- {Goodbye}.\n- <i>Paljon lunta mutta ei taskulamppua!</i>\n\n00:49:21.300 --> 00:49:24.250\n- The hell are you saying?\n- "A lot of snow, but no torch" in Finnish!\n\n00:49:24.250 --> 00:49:27.000\nYou're an idiot, just get outta here!\n\n00:49:32.420 --> 00:49:35.712\n{Swedes...}\n\n00:49:49.900 --> 00:49:53.000\n- Where's Sickan gone, huh?\n- Beats me.\n\n00:49:54.500 --> 00:49:56.370\nMaybe he's become Billgren.\n\n00:49:56.370 --> 00:49:59.400\nWhat, and gone behind our backs? He would never, fucking hell.\n\n00:49:59.400 --> 00:50:02.000\nNo. But maybe Billgren…\n\n00:50:02.750 --> 00:50:08.270\n… Yeah, we know exactly what he'd fucking do, that little rat. You know how he is… Right?\n\n00:50:08.270 --> 00:50:10.200\nThat little shitstain!!\n\n00:50:10.200 --> 00:50:12.400\nYeah, he's goddamn tiny. Ant-sized!\n\n00:50:12.400 --> 00:50:17.000\nThose guys are all following the same pattern: Napoleon, Hitler, Lenin… Feldt.\n\nNOTE Presumably referring to former Minister of Finance and Trade, Kjell-Olof Feldt.\n\n00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:21.200\nSmall Sickan-like runts, all of them. Despots, that's what they are!\n\n00:50:21.200 --> 00:50:24.730\n… He's shortsighted, too. And he wears a beret! Disgusting guy!\n\n00:50:24.730 --> 00:50:29.270\n- That's the last time-\n- What?\n\n00:50:29.440 --> 00:50:33.514\n- Sickan! \n- Ragnar, there he is!\n\n00:50:33.680 --> 00:50:37.620\nYeah, as we were saying, that's the last time we're ditching you.\n\n00:50:37.620 --> 00:50:40.000\nWe thought you'd left in advance, y'know.\n\n00:50:40.000 --> 00:50:42.250\n- We lack the brains!\n- And the genius.\n\n00:50:42.250 --> 00:50:48.000\nTwits… That's what you are.\n<b>Utterly worthless twits!</b>\n\n00:50:48.750 --> 00:50:52.480\nThe second I have my back turned to you, you start flinging shit at me!\n\n00:50:52.480 --> 00:50:56.633\nWho do you think you are?!\nI… Could have <b>died!</b>\n\n00:50:56.800 --> 00:51:02.398\nWhat on Earth has happened?\nWho is this?\n\n00:51:02.560 --> 00:51:04.597\nOw!\n\n00:51:04.760 --> 00:51:09.471\nYeah, we almost… hit that old lady\nwith our car… That's all.\n\n00:51:09.640 --> 00:51:13.000\n- Are you out of your minds?!\n- Scumbags!!\n\n00:51:13.000 --> 00:51:15.760\n- Come on, have a seat…\n- Alright… Oww…\n\n00:51:15.760 --> 00:51:20.551\n- There we go! Can I do anything for you?\n- Coffee…\n\n00:51:20.720 --> 00:51:24.873\n- Yes, I can get you that. That'll help!\n- Please, coffee!!\n\n00:51:25.040 --> 00:51:29.557\nAnd you… Running this old lady over. Who would do that?\n\n00:51:29.720 --> 00:51:33.680\nAnd it’s all that "genius"'s fault, getting you tangled up in who knows what… Sheesh!\n\n00:51:34.000 --> 00:51:37.250\nUtterly worthless…!\n\n00:51:40.750 --> 00:51:42.250\nWhat happened, Sickan?\n\n00:51:42.250 --> 00:51:45.900\nNow let's drink some coffee… Wait, where'd she go?\n\n00:51:45.900 --> 00:51:47.600\n- She poofed.\n- What?\n\n00:51:47.600 --> 00:51:53.000\n- She poofed!\n- What a peculiar person… Forgot her hat, too!\n\n00:51:53.000 --> 00:51:56.000\n- She gave it to us!\n- What, her hat?\n\n00:51:56.850 --> 00:51:58.850\nYes…\n\n00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:02.650\nWhat a peculiar person!\n\n00:52:02.650 --> 00:52:06.500\n- Didn't you have a client?\n- Oh, that's right!\n\n00:52:12.240 --> 00:52:14.550\nSickan! Tell us already!\n\n00:52:21.800 --> 00:52:27.239\nNow let’s see…\nYes! It’s registered at Dorisol.\n\n00:52:27.400 --> 00:52:31.997\n- What is it? {Where is it?}\n- We have to get a map!\n\n00:52:32.160 --> 00:52:37.110\n- We've got one at the hotel.\n- There's no time for that, we need a map now!\n\n00:52:37.280 --> 00:52:43.311\n- <i>Por favor...</i>\n- Favor? They have maps as a favour!\n\n00:52:45.500 --> 00:52:47.880\nThe lipstick.\n\n00:52:48.340 --> 00:52:56.634\nGermann has a specially constructed safe,\nwhich is connected to an electrical trap door.\n\n00:52:56.800 --> 00:53:03.070\nThis trap door opens automatically,\nexactly ten seconds after you touch the lock,\n\n00:53:03.240 --> 00:53:08.750\nprovided you entered the wrong code…\nAnd then it closes automatically again.\n\n00:53:08.750 --> 00:53:12.250\n- Clever!\n- It <i>is</i> Franz Jäger.\n\n00:53:12.250 --> 00:53:16.530\nThis safe contains the key to the whole mission,\n\n00:53:16.080 --> 00:53:21.553\nas well as 8 million dollars to be paid to The Lizard\nand Bro when the mission is complete.\n\n00:53:21.720 --> 00:53:26.192\n- We'll take the safe.\n- Wasn't it stuck in the wall?\n\n00:53:28.200 --> 00:53:33.070\n… Every inch of Germann's house is closely monitored due to her antiquities:\n\n00:53:33.240 --> 00:53:39.840\nIt is surrounded by electrical barbed wire on all sides,\nthere are security cameras and TVs, and nearly every window has a heat detector;\n\n00:53:40.000 --> 00:53:45.997\nnobody could ever breach this security system…\nApart from us, that is.\n\n00:53:47.040 --> 00:53:52.638\nBeneath the trap door I fell through,\nthere is a well which is five meters deep.\n\n00:53:52.800 --> 00:54:01.717\nAt the bottom there is a hole covered by a large stone.\nRemove the stone and you'll find caverns and tunnels reaching out to the sea.\n\n00:54:01.717 --> 00:54:05.878\nWe'll get in that way... And then up.\n\n00:54:08.440 --> 00:54:13.913\nIt says "Calle" here,\nbut it says so on several places…\n\n00:54:18.320 --> 00:54:22.109\nWhat’d I tell you? This isn’t it!\n\n00:54:27.360 --> 00:54:29.550\nLook!!\n\n00:54:29.550 --> 00:54:31.720\n- Ragnar?\n- Yeah, what's up?\n\n00:54:31.720 --> 00:54:39.355\n- Why don't we just lay down to measure it?\n- 'Cause we need to measure the height, not the length or width!\n\n00:54:39.520 --> 00:54:43.673\nGoddamn, what a tiny geezer!\n\n00:54:46.680 --> 00:54:51.357\nTalk about a climbing plant.\n\n00:54:51.357 --> 00:54:53.320\nNo… No-!\n\n00:54:53.320 --> 00:54:55.880\nWe've gotta go.\n\n00:54:55.880 --> 00:54:58.320\n<i>Creepis vulgaris</i>…\n\n00:54:58.320 --> 00:55:04.278\nWell well well, what do we have here? Perhaps\nthere's enough room for a little work-out?\n\n00:55:04.440 --> 00:55:10.710\nGod, what a mess! How southern:\nbeautiful facades, but gardens full of junk.\n\n00:55:10.880 --> 00:55:14.794\nYes… But we like living like that!\n\n00:55:14.960 --> 00:55:18.954\nOh… What's that hanging over there?\n\n00:55:22.560 --> 00:55:28.477\n- A grape bush?\n- Exactly - <i>frutti di casa</i>! Try one!\n\n00:55:28.640 --> 00:55:34.238\n- Anytime!\n- Right, we've seen what we came for.\n\n00:55:34.400 --> 00:55:36.869\nWhat?\n\n00:55:42.920 --> 00:55:49.110\n- We'll find our way out.\n- They were here just a moment ago…\n\n00:55:55.960 --> 00:56:02.480\nI have a plan, timed and prepared down to the last detail.\nWe'll strike in the morning - exactly 5 o'clock.\n\n00:56:02.640 --> 00:56:08.557\nWe need a rubber floatie with a solid bottom\nand a diameter of 80 centimetres. A watch…\n\n00:56:08.720 --> 00:56:13.000\nUh, a rubber hose, two meters long…\n\n00:56:13.000 --> 00:56:15.500\n- Circumference?\n- 41 centimetres.\n\n00:56:15.500 --> 00:56:18.500\nWe need a beach ball - and a watch, too.\n\n00:56:21.100 --> 00:56:25.400\nOh, no… You can't trick Harry.\nNot going out in the waters.\n\n00:56:27.560 --> 00:56:32.396\nNo... You'll never get <i>me</i>\nto step on that "pelledon"!\n\n00:56:32.560 --> 00:56:37.919\n- Get a grip already, Harry!\n- No! You need some style…\n\n00:56:38.080 --> 00:56:44.077\n- There it is!\n- No, you can’t trick Harry however you want…\n\n00:56:47.960 --> 00:56:52.989\n- Get here!\n- Come on, Harry!\n\n00:56:53.160 --> 00:56:58.838\nNo… not out in the ocean,\nyou'll never get <i>me</i> out on the ocean!\n\n00:56:59.000 --> 00:57:01.993\nGet here, now!\n\n00:57:03.160 --> 00:57:11.397\n- Get your watch! … It's exactly 07:16.\n- Exactly, Sickan.\n\n00:57:12.130 --> 00:57:14.000\nRight… You have 17 minutes.\n\n00:57:14.000 --> 00:57:19.300\nThe water level is supposed to sink by exactly\n180 centimetres, no more or less. Understood?\n\n00:57:19.300 --> 00:57:22.050\n- Sure thing, Sickan.\n- The pool is up there.\n\n00:57:23.500 --> 00:57:28.236\n- … Hey, I think it'd be better if Harry-\n- No way! Never mountains, and never out in the sea…\n\n00:57:28.400 --> 00:57:32.394\nHarry is needed <b>here</b>. Now hurry up.\n\n00:57:39.080 --> 00:57:43.074\nGet the torch.\n\n00:58:06.360 --> 00:58:08.317\nWait!\n\n00:58:21.920 --> 00:58:24.550\nFloatie. Beach ball.\n\n00:58:25.720 --> 00:58:29.794\nFloatie. Beach ball.\n\n00:58:29.960 --> 00:58:36.719\nThe pool is drained through here.\nThe well is over there.\n\n00:58:36.880 --> 00:58:41.238\nI’ll take a look at it.\n\n00:58:45.280 --> 00:58:49.354\nOh, so that’s how it is… Yep.\n\n00:58:58.240 --> 00:59:04.838\nYep... I’ll put a fella here,\nthen the water comes in that way.\n\n00:59:14.960 --> 00:59:19.477\nThere. No, let me think…\n\n00:59:21.160 --> 00:59:28.715\nThere. One second,\ntwo, three…\n\n00:59:28.880 --> 00:59:33.352\nAnd we’ll do this… There…\n\n00:59:37.520 --> 00:59:39.989\nRight!\n\n00:59:48.400 --> 00:59:52.189\nFire in the hole!\n\n00:59:56.200 --> 00:59:59.238\nSickan? Hello?\n\n01:00:00.360 --> 01:00:05.754\nIt’s dangerous now… Sickan!\n\n01:00:14.160 --> 01:00:18.154\n- The tube!\n- Yes…\n\n01:00:31.280 --> 01:00:34.751\nWhat a fucking mountain!\n\n01:00:37.880 --> 01:00:41.351\nWhat a friggin' blast!\n\n01:01:14.000 --> 01:01:16.879\nBe careful, now!\n\n01:01:19.600 --> 01:01:22.718\nNow's the time. Come on, Ragnar!\n\n01:01:27.520 --> 01:01:32.549\nHarry! Keep blowing it up!\n\n01:01:32.720 --> 01:01:39.513\n- Let the air out in exactly six minutes!\n- Got it!\n\n01:02:11.360 --> 01:02:14.831\nNow we’ll stop.\n\n01:02:17.640 --> 01:02:24.433\nNow let’s see… Six minutes past… Recently.\n\n01:02:33.640 --> 01:02:37.600\n- Harry!\n- Then the time is…\n\n01:02:37.760 --> 01:02:43.711\n- It's tight. No worries.\n- Harry!\n\n01:02:43.880 --> 01:02:46.918\nIt’s all under control!\n\n01:02:47.080 --> 01:02:50.756\nStop…\n\n01:02:52.920 --> 01:02:56.914\n- Stop!\n- Float on!\n\n01:03:13.160 --> 01:03:19.400\n- It's us.\n- The gates and door are handled automatically.\n\n01:03:19.440 --> 01:03:25.037\nTwo stairs down, the first door to the left.\nI'll be waiting.\n\n01:03:50.480 --> 01:03:54.474\nThere’s… There’s a lot left.\n\n01:03:58.560 --> 01:04:01.917\nWhat’s going on?! Oh dear…\n\n01:04:02.080 --> 01:04:07.553\nNo worries, it’s all fine.\nThe clock is moving…\n\n01:04:09.040 --> 01:04:12.954\nThat was a friggin’… Great start.\n\n01:04:17.680 --> 01:04:21.196\nIt's going well. No!\n\n01:04:21.360 --> 01:04:26.037\nNo. No! Harry!\n\n01:04:30.120 --> 01:04:33.591\nOh, it’s leaking!\n\n01:04:35.240 --> 01:04:39.712\nHarry! More water! More!\n\n01:04:41.560 --> 01:04:46.999\nMore water, Harry!\n\n01:04:50.360 --> 01:04:52.875\nWhat a slip-up!\n\n01:04:53.500 --> 1:04:56.000\n<c.magenta>- Brilliant…</c>\n- Of course!\n\n01:04:58.600 --> 01:05:00.592\nNo…!\n\n01:05:04.400 --> 01:05:07.120\nDamned duck!\n\n01:05:07.280 --> 01:05:12.753\nThat’s beautiful, you know…\nHalfway there. Brilliant!\n\n01:05:14.320 --> 01:05:21.352\nWall-Enberg and I will be waiting on the terrace.\nYou should be here by 10:30.\n\n01:05:23.480 --> 01:05:28.475\nOh bother… Would you look at that.\n\n01:05:32.720 --> 01:05:35.713\nCome on, you…!\n\n01:05:39.960 --> 01:05:43.112\nUh-huh. Just as I thought.\n\n01:05:44.720 --> 01:05:48.077\nThat's more or less exactly it, y'know.\n\n01:06:22.280 --> 01:06:27.036\nThis is a crisis… Now the clock is… Now…\n\n01:06:27.200 --> 01:06:32.275\nNow it’s late.\n\n01:06:32.440 --> 01:06:35.911\nNow those six minutes have gone.\n\n01:07:19.520 --> 01:07:24.390\n57… 58… 59…\n\n01:07:24.560 --> 01:07:32.275\n… 60! Now’s the time!\nDarn, that’s one spray!\n\n01:07:33.400 --> 01:07:35.869\nHarry!\n\n01:07:39.240 --> 01:07:43.917\n- Not yet!\n- Sickan?\n\n01:07:44.080 --> 01:07:48.916\nHarry, it’s too early!\n\n01:07:49.080 --> 01:07:53.438\n- When do you want the copy?\n- Now!\n\n01:07:53.600 --> 01:07:59.597\nIt is inside the safe…\nJust a moment, gentlemen.\n\n01:08:41.920 --> 01:08:47.439\nThis way, gentlemen.\n\n01:10:26.840 --> 01:10:32.040\n- And you controlled the equipment?\n- It works perfectly.\n\n01:10:32.200 --> 01:10:37.514\n- You got the best designer.\n- The most expensive.\n\n01:10:37.680 --> 01:10:40.718\nQuality has its price.\n\n01:10:51.320 --> 01:10:57.032\nCurious… The floor is wet.\nMust be the cat.\n\n01:10:57.200 --> 01:11:03.674\n- But you don’t have a cat!\n- That's the curious part.\n\n01:11:07.120 --> 01:11:10.716\n- Oh, now what?\n- A stray pissed on this safe?!\n\n01:11:10.880 --> 01:11:13.998\nIt’s unlocked…\n\n01:11:19.040 --> 01:11:22.192\n- What is this?\n- Billgren.\n\n01:11:22.360 --> 01:11:28.118\n- Charles-Ingvar Jönsson!\n- That is utterly fucked up.\n\n01:11:28.280 --> 01:11:32.672\nThat… Should be liquidated\nwithin two hours.\n\n01:11:32.840 --> 01:11:35.309\nOur pleasure.\n\n01:12:00.350 --> 01:12:03.390\n- Where's Sickan?\n- <b>You</b> should know, you went with him!\n\n01:12:03.390 --> 01:12:09.600\nYeah, I shoved the knife in at just the right time,\nand then there was a friggin' torrent…\n\n01:12:09.600 --> 01:12:11.913\nI thought he washed out here!\n\n01:12:12.080 --> 01:12:18.520\n- Something's gone wack… We're outta here!\n- No… Not the ocean, never the ocean!!\n\n01:12:18.680 --> 01:12:21.673\nGet here, now!\n\n01:12:22.480 --> 01:12:28.477\n- But what about Sickan?\n- I'm outta here, at least! Now get here!\n\n01:12:30.720 --> 01:12:33.713\n… Got any beer?\n\n01:13:01.960 --> 01:13:05.590\nWhat a light bastard!\n\n01:13:22.080 --> 01:13:27.394\nThat guy won't be wetting\nGermann's safe anymore…\n\n01:13:27.560 --> 01:13:31.474\nScarcely!\n\n01:13:41.920 --> 01:13:49.396\n- Maybe he's still up by the house?\n- Let's go there and check!\n\n01:14:52.840 --> 01:14:58.154\nI've cracked Wall-Enberg and Germann's plans.\nPossibly the grandest operation in criminal history…\n\n01:14:58.320 --> 01:15:03.679\n… A bold, unlikely heist\nat the Cathedral of Palma itself!\n\n01:15:03.840 --> 01:15:10.917\n- What, they're gonna steal the whole cathedral?\n- No… its most valuable item beyond compare!\n\n01:15:11.080 --> 01:15:14.994\n- What's that?\n- The King's Cross. A relic…\n\n01:15:15.160 --> 01:15:20.599\nGold and silver, decorated with gems and diamonds,\nestimated value: a quarter of a billion.\n\n01:15:20.760 --> 01:15:25.789\nIt is forbidden to take photos of it,\nand the only images available are kept in Cardinal Bulka's safe.\n\n01:15:25.960 --> 01:15:32.958\n- And that's why they needed you!\n- Exactly. Germann used them to create a copy of the cross.\n\n01:15:35.720 --> 01:15:38.500\nHow do you know all that?\n\n01:15:38.500 --> 01:15:43.750\n… The copy is located in Germann's safe.\nThey're going to swap it out with the real one.\n\n01:15:43.750 --> 01:15:45.400\nHow?\n\n01:15:45.700 --> 01:15:46.950\nI don't know.\n\n01:15:46.950 --> 01:15:49.720\n- When do they strike, then?\n- I don't know!\n\n01:15:49.720 --> 01:15:53.880\n- Yeah, that's really promising.\n- Oi!! Don't you talk to Charles-Ingvar like that!\n\n01:15:53.880 --> 01:15:59.000\nThat's not what he wants to hear…\nNot when he’s about to say: "I have a plan"!\n\n01:16:01.320 --> 01:16:07.510\n"I… Have… A plan!"\n\n01:16:07.680 --> 01:16:11.674\nI… Don't have a plan… Yet.\n\n01:16:11.680 --> 01:16:14.000\nNope!\n\n01:16:15.160 --> 01:16:19.154\nPlease move aside, there's no time!\n\n01:16:23.440 --> 01:16:27.912\n- There are public toilets at Plaza Gomilla!\n- Quickly!\n\n01:16:31.080 --> 01:16:39.238\n- No: up the hill, then to the right!\n- Goddamnit, he left again! It's all pointless…\n\n01:16:39.400 --> 01:16:44.156\n- Now what?\n- We'll just have to keep searching!\n\n01:16:49.560 --> 01:16:52.553\nI have a plan.\n\n01:17:21.640 --> 01:17:24.633\nThat’s them!\n\n01:17:45.120 --> 01:17:48.955\n- They're gone…\n- Around the corner, yes.\n\n01:17:49.120 --> 01:17:52.909\nKeep calm. They'll return.\n\n01:18:04.760 --> 01:18:10.000\n- Yes, there they are!\n- Arabs?\n\n01:18:10.000 --> 01:18:14.352\n- No, it's them.\n- But they're the same height…\n\n01:18:28.260 --> 01:18:35.680\nThe world’s most valuable artistic relic\nis stored within this room…\n\n01:18:35.680 --> 01:18:39.872\nThe invaluable King’s Cross.\n\n01:18:40.040 --> 01:18:45.240\nI must ask all of you\nto put your cameras away.\n\n01:18:45.400 --> 01:18:50.680\nIt is strictly forbidden\nto take photos in here.\n\n01:18:50.840 --> 01:18:54.277\nAny recorded footage will be destroyed automatically.\n\n01:18:54.440 --> 01:18:59.515\nFor security reasons, you may only enter the treasury in pairs of two.\n\n01:18:59.680 --> 01:19:06.154\nIf you would like to take a look,\nleave the cameras here and form a queue…\n\n01:19:39.800 --> 01:19:42.599\n{Goodbye.}\n\n01:19:48.260 --> 01:19:51.832\n- They didn't do anything.\n- Did they change their minds?\n\n01:19:52.500 --> 01:19:58.395\nWe'll will return tomorrow, immediately after the cathedral opens.\nI have a plan.\n\n01:19:58.560 --> 01:20:05.558\nWe will need ten metres of sheets,\nblack rope, and a mannequin.\n\n01:20:07.680 --> 01:20:21.791\nHarry!\n\n01:20:21.960 --> 01:20:27.957\nWhere have they gone this time?\nThey’ve left with their torches again…\n\n01:20:29.240 --> 01:20:36.716\nTook the car, too. If it’s not this thing, it’s the other…\n\n01:20:45.400 --> 01:20:49.394\nNow they’re here… Don’t look!\n\n01:21:19.840 --> 01:21:24.790\n- Do you have any camera?\n- No.\n\n01:21:48.600 --> 01:21:51.593\nMove.\n\n01:22:57.160 --> 01:23:00.153\nGive me the cross.\n\n01:23:16.920 --> 01:23:19.913\nWe’re heading to the car.\n\n01:23:43.680 --> 01:23:46.879\nBro! Where’d you go?\n\n01:23:50.680 --> 01:23:54.393\nDrive the exact route I laid out to you.\nNot a single car could follow.\n\n01:23:54.400 --> 01:23:58.000\n- That's brilliant, Sickan!\n- Of course!\n\n01:24:12.600 --> 01:24:15.230\nHoly shit!\n\n01:24:17.240 --> 01:24:21.234\n- Fuck! Now what?\n- The wheel!\n\n01:24:24.000 --> 01:24:26.469\nTempo!\n\n01:24:26.520 --> 01:24:29.194\nDrive!\n\n01:24:52.320 --> 01:24:55.314\n- Drive!\n- I'm already driving!\n\n01:24:57.680 --> 01:25:01.118\nLook!\n\n01:25:01.280 --> 01:25:05.240\nTurn that way!\n\n01:25:13.720 --> 01:25:16.712\nDammit!\n\n01:25:47.800 --> 01:25:53.194\nYou do the ropes, I’ll handle the burner!\nHarry’s done this before!\n\n01:25:55.440 --> 01:25:57.239\nThat’s right! Come on!\n\n01:25:57.400 --> 01:26:01.360\nSickan, follow up!\n\n01:26:06.480 --> 01:26:11.590\n- Come on, Sickan!\n- Don't give up!\n\n01:26:14.240 --> 01:26:18.599\nNo problem, Bro…\nThe wind’s coming our way.\n\n01:26:17.960 --> 01:26:22.514\n- Go to the side!\n- We can't! It’s either up or down!\n\n01:26:25.320 --> 01:26:28.757\nHigher!\n\n01:26:28.920 --> 01:26:32.199\nWhat about Sickan? … I’ll hit the gas!\n\n01:26:32.360 --> 01:26:35.956\nWe’re lifting!\n\n01:26:39.640 --> 01:26:44.032\n- Higher!\n- I'm doing all I can!\n\n01:26:46.920 --> 01:26:52.154\n- Get him up!\n- Help out, then!\n\n01:26:52.154 --> 01:26:57.520\nHe's stuck, you've gotta get rid of him, Sickan!\n\n01:26:57.520 --> 01:27:00.592\nShake him off!\n\n01:27:00.592 --> 01:27:02.600\nThere we go!\n\n01:27:08.120 --> 01:27:11.797\nThat was a close one… Look!!\n\n01:27:11.960 --> 01:27:16.000\n- At what?\n- Mallorca!\n\n01:27:16.000 --> 01:27:19.000\n- It's so calm…\n- And quiet!\n\n01:27:20.950 --> 01:27:22.900\nHow does one make this vessel land?\n\n01:27:22.900 --> 01:27:27.071\nWell, you pull on this,\nand then a hatch opens near the top,\n\n01:27:27.240 --> 01:27:31.598\nand then the warm air goes out,\nand then the balloon sinks.\n\n01:27:31.760 --> 01:27:36.357\n- Oh, that's convenient…\n- Yep, sure is!\n\n01:27:36.520 --> 01:27:39.797\nSparklin' wine, Sickan!\n\nNOTE "Sprattelvatten" is slang for champaigne or sparkling wine in general; it literally translates to "flouncing/rattling water".\n\n01:27:39.950 --> 01:27:42.000\nLook!\n\n01:27:42.600 --> 01:27:46.913\n- Hunker down!\n- Now I'm the one making the rules!\n\n01:27:53.500 --> 01:27:58.650\n- What a friggin' bang!\n- Brilliant, Sickan! \n\n01:27:59.000 --> 01:28:01.471\n- Of course… Cheers!\n- Woah!!\n\n01:28:06.840 --> 01:28:10.470\n- The hole!\n- Wait… What?\n\n01:28:10.640 --> 01:28:15.113\n- Harry, we're sinking!\n- Keep calm, we'll just have to light it up!\n\n01:28:15.280 --> 01:28:17.950\n- Wait, what's this? Oh!\n- Just do something!\n\n01:28:17.950 --> 01:28:21.560\nHe took the gas slang with him. That's no good.\n\n01:28:21.560 --> 01:28:25.351\n- <b>Then <i>do something!</i></b>\n- Such as… What?\n\n01:28:25.700 --> 01:28:28.000\nHey… He's still hanging on under the wicker!\n\n01:28:28.000 --> 01:28:29.650\nNo no no no, ow ow ow ow!\n\n01:28:29.650 --> 01:28:33.950\n- <b>We're <i>CRASHING,</i> Harry!</b>\n- No… How about we land now, guys?\n\n01:28:33.960 --> 01:28:35.516\n- Just keep squatting!\n- … What?\n\n01:28:35.680 --> 01:28:38.150\n- Yeah, just do this.\n\n01:28:38.150 --> 01:28:43.360\n- Harry?!\n- Soften up your knees and follow my lead!\n\n01:28:43.360 --> 01:28:48.512\nWe're landing now!\nThat went pretty well!\n\n01:28:51.120 --> 01:28:54.033\n- Get moving!\n- Wait… W-wait for me!\n\n01:29:20.720 --> 01:29:23.838\nNo, no, not again!\n\n01:29:31.000 --> 01:29:33.437\n- Brilliant, Sickan!\n- Of course!\n\n01:29:34.600 --> 01:29:36.991\n<i>La banda de Jönsson!</i>\n\n01:29:41.000 --> 01:29:44.914\nThis is a non-smoking train…\n\n01:29:48.280 --> 01:29:53.354\nFinally! What a coincidence…\n\n01:29:53.440 --> 01:29:58.596\nWell, gentlemen…\nThat’s the end of this little affair.\n\n01:30:01.440 --> 01:30:05.593\n- Not quite.\n- Not quite?\n\n01:30:05.760 --> 01:30:10.596\nOne little detail remains.\n\n01:30:10.760 --> 01:30:14.754\nGentlemen, would you be interested in…\n\n01:30:14.920 --> 01:30:20.712\n… Cracking the greatest antiquity heist\nin all of criminal history?\n\n01:30:24.360 --> 01:30:30.630\n- What are you referring to, Jönsson?\n- The heist that took place in Palma's cathedral, just a few hours ago.\n\n01:30:30.800 --> 01:30:34.260\n- We haven't heard of any heist.\n- No, and you probably won't!\n\n01:30:34.260 --> 01:30:43.920\nUnless you would like to negotiate… Let’s call it <i>nolle hosequi</i>.\n\n01:30:44.080 --> 01:30:49.030\n- Horsetrading?\n- That would be another term for it, yes.\n\n01:30:49.200 --> 01:30:52.910\nYou gentlemen ought to be used to such things.\n\n01:30:52.080 --> 01:30:58.553\n- So, what would the deal be?\n- The following:\n\n01:30:58.720 --> 01:31:04.512\nI can tell you exactly,\ndown to the last detail…\n\n01:31:04.520 --> 01:31:10.260\nHow it happened, what was stolen,\nwhere the goods are, and who did it.\n\n01:31:10.260 --> 01:31:17.634\n- Like, it wasn't us!\n- And what would we do for you?\n\n01:31:18.800 --> 01:31:21.520\nRelease us!\n\n01:31:24.520 --> 01:31:28.514\nWhat was stolen?\n\n01:31:32.880 --> 01:31:40.913\nThis… The King's Cross.\n\n01:31:54.560 --> 01:32:01.034\nThey ought to be here by now.\nCalm down, they'll come… They are pros, after all.\n\n01:32:02.400 --> 01:32:05.711\nLook!\n\n01:32:10.800 --> 01:32:13.395\nIt's a bust!\n\n01:32:15.160 --> 01:32:17.277\n"Pros"?\n\n01:32:19.000 --> 01:32:22.800\nPersson has handed the King’s cross\nback to the Cathedral now…\n\n01:32:25.200 --> 01:32:30.195\nBetcha he'll fucking get\nthe reward for finding it, too.\n\n01:32:37.400 --> 01:32:43.670\n… Guess that's that. "Much ado 'bout nothing,"\nas they say when you go off chasing wild geese!\n\nNOTE\nThe original line was Vanheden trying to say an old idiom and only getting three words or so right.\n(The meaning didn’t get lost though: it was an elaborate way to call something a worthless effort.)\n\n01:32:43.840 --> 01:32:49.154\n- Yes… At least we're free?\n- Sure, but dirt poor.\n\n01:32:49.320 --> 01:32:51.350\nDamn, guess we've gotta get back to work…\n\n01:32:51.350 --> 01:32:55.550\nWhy don't you go to town, steal a horse cart\nand start ferrying tourists around, <i>Billgren</i>?\n\n01:32:55.550 --> 01:32:59.514\nNow now, boys, that's enough!\n\n01:32:59.680 --> 01:33:07.440\nLet's see what Harry can come up with\nto lighten up the mood!\n\n01:33:07.600 --> 01:33:11.720\n- A little surprise…\n- I don't want any sunstrokes today!\n\n01:33:11.880 --> 01:33:18.000\nYes, I get that… After all,\nwhen we celebrate we usually go for champaigne!\n\n01:33:21.960 --> 01:33:25.920\n- From the cave!\n- What's that?\n\n01:33:26.080 --> 01:33:29.869\nEight millions!!\n\n01:33:30.040 --> 01:33:34.115\n- In pesetas?\n- Dollars, Ragnar… Dollars!\n\n01:33:34.280 --> 01:33:40.595\n- Harry! Damn, we're millionaires- look!!\n- Doris?\n\n01:33:46.800 --> 01:33:50.192\nYou see, if we divide this by four\nit will be an insane amount of money-\n\n01:33:50.360 --> 01:33:55.516\nWoah! That's how much you get in compensation?!\n\n01:33:55.750 --> 01:34:00.560\n- Compensation?\n- For jailing you by accident!\n\n01:34:00.560 --> 01:34:05.600\n- Of course… "Compensation"!\n- Here's the champaigne!\n\n01:34:05.600 --> 01:34:08.100\n[<i>Goodbye!</i>]
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Jönssonligan på Mallorca (1989) Movie Script | Subs like Script
Vanheden and Dynamit-Harry, together with Harry's fiancée Doris, are in Mallorca while Sickan is still in Stockholm. However, Wall-Enberg talks him into doing a break-in at Las Palmas cathedral in Mallorca. Once persuaded, he can't resist the temptation and travels to Mallorca as well. However, Wall-Enberg obviously can't be trusted. Sickan is framed, caught and put in jail. While being escorted home to Sweden again, Vanheden and Harry sets up a plan to break him free. Sickan, once free, wants payback. The gang discover that an antiques dealer called Germann has something to do with the whole thing and that she's also collaborating with Wall-Enberg. The gang then decide to take a closer look at her and her antiques and they discover that there's a heist being planned against the cathedral in Palma.