Into the Sun (1991) - full transcript
Pilot Paul Watkins is stationed in the Mediterranean area to fly patrol and to protect the air space from the expansion tendencies of an Arabian country. But then he's withdrawn from the patrol and gets the order to lead the actor Tom Slade around on their base and explain him everything: The popular star wants to get "the feeling" for his next movie. Paul is less than thrilled with this task, although he's impressed by Slade's talent. During a sample flight they get right into an air combat and into the enemy's land. Now they can show who's more of a fighter...
Request you correct
to Two-Niner-Nancy
at Checkpoint Alpha.
SHOTGUN: I copy, Katiana.
Correct to Two-Niner-Nancy
at Checkpoint Alpha.
DECARLO: Uh, Shotgun,
pardon my thinking,
but that's not exactly
our neighborhood.
SHOTGUN: Bird-Zero-One
to Bird-Zero-Two,
DECARLO:
Spoken like a true milkman,
Captain Shotgun.
Bird-Zero-One,
Bird-Zero-Two,
approaching checkpoint Alpha.
Execute 40-degree turn.
Roger, Shotgun.
Executing 4-0 degree turn.
Radar's clear.
No aircraft in sector.
Now you're talking
my language, Shotgun.
Yo! Ah!
DECARLO: Highly suggest
you get out of autopilot
and start pulling some Gs here.
I think I know my way
around the cockpit, Decarlo.
Wahoo!
[CHUCKLING]
Come on, Decarlo,
that all you've got?
See if the Great Boy
can hit a moving target.
DECARLO: Any time.
There isn't
a barn big enough
that you can hide behind.
DECARLO: Oh, very smart.
Ho ho.
I'm on your six, buddy.
You want regular
or premium?
[LAUGHING]
Hold still.
You're mine.
You're mine, buddy.
Just take it like a man.
Come on.
Hah!
Hold still.
Hold still.
That's a negative.
Where the hell did you go?
Better check
your six, Decarlo.
I got you.
SHOTGUN: Smile.
Smile.
Guns! Guns!
Guns! Guns! Guns!
You're dead, Decarlo.
Yeah.
You got lucky, that's all.
Yeah. Right.
The harder I work,
the luckier I get.
[RADAR BEEPING]
What the hell's going on?
Well, well, well.
Get out the cards.
Looks like we got enough
for a poker game.
Katiana Control,
Bird-Zero-One.
SHOTGUN: Katiana Control,
Bird-Zero-One. Over.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Read you, Bird-Zero-One.
We're being pursued
by hostile aircraft.
Request orders. Over.
KATIANA CONTROL: Do not engage.
Repeat. Do not engage.
Maintain course.
Roger.
[RAPID BEEPING]
Man, I hate that noise.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Bird-Zero-One, Bird-Zero-Two,
hold your course,
Bearing 2-3
off Checkpoint Baker.
Come on, Shotgun,
let's do something.
We have a good signature on it.
Continue to maintain.
Roger.
Doesn't look like these guys
are screwing around,
does it?
Shotgun, I don't like
the feel of this.
These guys are serious.
They're getting close.
SHOTGUN: Steady.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Bird-Zero-One, do not engage.
Repeat. Do not engage.
Maintain--
SHOTGUN:
That's a negative, Decarlo!
Come on, Shotgun, let's fire
some ordnance on these guys.
Maintain wing to wing!
We're over
international waters.
They won't attack.
Shotgun, you better be right,
'cause there's one coming
up on our six.
Whoa!
Jeez!
Look at that crazy
son of a bitch!
[LAUGHING]
Let's go home, Snake.
I know you'd like
nothing more
than to blow
those assholes out of the sky.
They would like nothing more
than to provoke
an international incident.
I mean, anything to fuel
their propaganda war.
Our job is to deny them
that opportunity.
That mirage came
six inches from shearing
off my wing tip.
Decarlo, I don't care
if the guy came,
knocked on your door,
and asked
to take your sister
to a convention
of Hell's Angels.
Until he actually opens fire,
we're to avoid
any provocative action
or reaction.
Captain Watkins,
would you please explain
to Captain Decarlo
how we do things here.
By the book, sir.
By the book.
Are we on
the same frequency?
Yes, sir.
That's good.
Now get your sorry face
out of my sight.
This needs your attention.
Not you, Captain Watkins.
Sir?
Convention of Hell's Angels.
to serve as
the technical adviser
on a movie.
Look, you're the only flier
I've got on this base
that I know won't
embarrass the squadron.
Sounds like
a ground assignment, sir.
Report to Major Goode
in the PA's office.
Major?
Anything wrong, Captain?
No, sir.
Dismissed.
All right, sweetheart--
excuse me-- Major.
This is authorization
from the highest level.
Whoa! You've got
a lot of legs there.
[LAUGHS]
Go ahead.
Read it. Read it.
All right.
Paul Watkins?
Good old Paul Watkins.
Who the hell is he?
I don't know,
but you help us
on this,
it could be big for you.
I'm serious about that.
Really, really big.
Okay?
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
-Come in.
-Come in.
-Sorry.
-Major?
You wanted to see me?
Yes, Captain Watkins.
I'd like you to meet
Mitchell Burton.
How you doing, kid?
I'm Tom Slade's
personal manager.
How you doing?
-Fine.
-Good.
Tom Slade?
Tom Slade, the actor.
Well, let's not push it.
But, I mean,
it's Tom Slade, the star.
The sensation.
Hello?
Are you, uh--
Silent but Deadly?
"D" for Danger?
Lightning Strikes?
Lightning Strikes Again?
-Oh, these are movies.
-Movies. Right.
I've seen that one,
I think.
You think?
That's good.
Yes.
There's-- wait.
Let me--
Let me tell you.
He is perfect.
Yes, it's a cute haircut.
You know,
he's absolutely perfect.
Because Tom wants
somebody that's not
a Hollywood type.
See? Look at him
standing there.
I mean, come on.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
Hold it.
Ever see one
of these things?
Yowee!
Hello.
Tommy! Tom.
Oh, whoa, whoa.
Let me talk to you.
Can you hold on
one second?
We got dinner
tonight at 6:00?
1800, 1900?
What? I never can--
Military things.
It's so--
Yeah? No!
Let me tell you something.
No. I mean, this--
I'm talking--
you're going
to love this
'cause I'm talking
serious reality here.
Yeah. Okay. Sure.
Let me explain it
to you, all right?
Uh-huh.
Tom Slade's starring
as a fighter pilot
in his movie.
You're going to show him
the ropes.
I'm not a babysitter, Lauren.
What's this
really about?
I thought
you'd be thrilled.
You seem thrilled enough
for both of us.
Can I get out of this?
It's just two weeks.
Yeah, but I should be
flying for those weeks.
Please don't make me
pull rank.
I would never do that...
Actually I'm very flattered
that you, uh,
chose me
for this assignment.
Hold it, Mister.
I didn't ask for you
to be assigned
to this detail.
As usual,
someone upstairs
is under the
false impression
that you're qualified.
-Yeah?
-As a pilot.
You'll meet Slade
at dinner tonight.
And after dinner?
Paul...
We've been all over this.
We had fun
back at Subic,
but I can't
do that anymore.
I've got
to be realistic.
All right, Captain?
Is that an order?
Let's just say
it's against regulations.
My regulations.
Yes, sir.
Major.
Lauren, I hate this already.
Read it this afternoon.
We have dinner with Slade
in the mess hall at 1800.
Dismissed.
-[DOOR CLOSES]
-[EXHALES]
Luckily, the truck
that hit him
was a bloodmobile.
He's late, isn't he?
Maybe he won't show.
Hey! Hey, Shotgun.
Heard you guys had
a close call today.
Missed us
by at least six inches.
Yeah? That means
your dick had
five inches to spare.
[CHUCKLES]
[LAUGHING]
Oh!
That's Tom Slade.
[PLATES CRASHING]
Can't believe it.
Hah... that's him.
How you doing?
Oh, I'm a big fan
of yours.
That's good.
Oh, hi...
No, no.
That's all right, honey.
That's, uh--
[CHUCKLES]
He's a good kid,
isn't he?
All right.
We'll be glad
to sign autographs.
Bring them
over to the table
after dinner, all right?
All right.
Here we go.
How you doing,
my friend?
Tom, this is the man
I was telling you about--
Captain Paul Watkins.
Captain, meet Tom Slade.
I don't believe
we've met, have we?
Tom Slade.
Captain Paul Watkins.
Nice to meet you.
Eddie Decarlo.
They call me
the Snake.
I want to say
I'm a big fan of yours.
That one,
Silent but Deadly,
that's one of the all-time--
Hang on a second.
Watch this.
Your lunch
is ready, sir.
[IMITATES GUNSHOTS]
Pfft!
How do you guys
come up with
scenes like that?
We pay screenwriters.
Does everyone
want to sit down?
Come on, honey.
Everybody sit.
Sit down.
Could I get you
something to eat?
What do you want?
I'll surprise you.
That's a good idea.
I need a chair.
Honey, can I use this?
Do you mind?
Nice haircut.
All right. Here we go.
We're all sitting down.
This is good.
This is real good.
It's good.
Captain Watkins
was top of his class
at the academy,
then fighter weapons
school at Nellis,
then Edwards, where he--
Paul-- can I call you Paul?
Of course. He's Paul.
Paul.
I'm very excited
about this part.
You see, I want to get
under the skin
of the fighter jock
mentality.
You know,
the machismo,
the war ethos,
mixing it up
in a dogfight
at 20,000 feet,
putting your life
on the line every day.
You know what I mean.
I'm thinking
it must require
such incredible dedication,
such intense concentration.
That's what I need to get
a handle on.
You know, acting
involves a lot
of self-sacrfice, too.
You have to triumph
over your own ego
to do the job right.
-There's lots--
-Mr. Slade.
Tom.
you're not allowed
to smoke indoors.
Regulations.
Mitch...
Uh...
Uh...
Uh, listen.
Do you have that script?
Have you had
a chance to--
Have you had a chance
to read it at all?
Yes. Yes, I have.
So what'd you think?
Well, there are a few
technical inaccuracies,
little problems, really.
But overall,
what did you think overall?
Um, who cares
what I think?
I'm not a critic, really.
Mitch, correct me
if I'm wrong,
but everyone is a critic.
Everyone--
Everyone.
Okay.
Well, you know,
in the last scene,
a MiG is hit.
Your hero plays with
a heat-seeker, right?
His body's riddled
with bullets,
the plane is going down,
and, you know,
the eject lever
isn't working.
Listen to what
this guy says.
"I'm not going
to make it.
I'm going down.
Tell the boys
not to worry about me.
I'll be flying higher
than I ever flew before...
[IMPERSONATING JOHN WAYNE]
straight into the sun."
That's John Wayne.
Are you suggesting
it's not that realistic?
It's supposed
to have a, you know,
mythic quality.
I don't think
Captain Watkins
is suggesting--
What would you say then?
I guess--
I guess it's okay
for your movie.
No, what would you say?
If I was going to die,
and my jet's going down?
Something more like, uh...
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
Right.
Captain...
Pardon me, Major.
[ALL LAUGHING]
No. I like that.
I like that.
Pencil that in, Mitch.
Shit, shit, shit?
You want me to
pencil in "Shit, shit, shit"?
-Yeah.
-Okay. Got it.
Excuse me.
Wasn't sure
what you wanted.
I got a little
of everything.
Thank you, Captain.
Yeah. Sure.
Well...
Where was I?
Uh, Tommy...
When he prepared
for Flames of Fury,
he rode the fire truck
for how long?
Three months.
See, I deal
in experiences.
I find that
thorough research
and finding the right
role model is the key.
Oh, yeah.
Do you know what?
We should get going.
Shall we go, General?
Mm-hmm.
I'll lead the way.
Here we go.
Paul, it's going
to be great
working with you.
Oh...
Regulations.
Should be an experience.
Three months.
WOMAN: I've seen
all his movies.
I like him.
Low-key but with
quiet intensity.
He's a lot younger
than I expected.
It's exactly
what I expected.
MITCHELL: Fuck him.
Fuck him.
Just fuck him!
Right. Hold on.
-Morning, Captain.
-Morning, sir.
I just want to say
what he's going
to say to you.
No. No.
Let that little prick
do what he wants.
Hold on.
We really should
be going, sir.
I'm going to have
to call you back.
No, you're right.
Fuck him!
Right. Bye, Mom.
Kiss, kiss.
My mom.
Ah, dear.
You know...
I got to ask you
a favor
about, uh, Tommy.
I know he's hard
to take at times.
But he can be
a real sweetheart.
I don't want him to do
anything too stupid.
Know what I mean?
I understand.
You're beautiful!
I love you.
Hey, come on.
It's a figure of speech,
all right?
Hey, coming
to our party tonight?
Got anything
else to wear
besides this stuff?
I mean something
alive, bright.
Ah...
You look... Oh.
Allow me.
Get up!
The only thing
that works.
Good morning.
What time is it?
0800.
0800? You guys really
talk like that?
Yes.
Give me a sec.
Yeah, but--
We fly cover
for the whole
Mediterranean from here.
That's South Europe,
North Africa,
and the Persian Gulf.
[JET ROARING]
We fly the F-16 Falcon,
which faded out
the old F-4 Phantom.
Morning, sir!
Wait. Wait. Hold it.
-How'd you do that?
-What?
The salute-- is there
something special
about the number
like air force versus army?
-Salute.
-Just salute.
Okay. I'm getting it.
I'm feeling it.
-Congratulations.
-Thanks.
What's it like
sitting in an F-14?
16-- whatever.
I'm not good
with numbers.
Can we do this?
Tom, that's not so easy.
[BEEPING]
Here it comes.
All right, baby.
Come on.
Let's go.
I got you.
Come on here.
[BEEP]
[WHOOPING]
Not bad.
Not bad?
He's doing great.
I've never seen anybody
get the hang of this
so quickly.
Don't get carried away.
Lucky shot.
Yeah? Let's see
what he can do.
Come on.
Come on, baby.
Got to bring some
to get some.
Throw me a curve now, huh?
All right. Got it!
[LAUGHING]
I don't believe it.
Whoo!
I've always had
extremely good
hand-eye coordination.
Flying these airplanes
is a lot like
a video game.
There's more to it
than that.
What I need to do
is fly,
get up there and see
what it's really like.
They'll never give
you authorization
to do that.
Right.
We're about to see
the debriefing room
and flight control.
That's the F-14.
F-18.
Stealth...
Fighter.
Good morning,
Mr. Slade.
[WHISTLING]
You guys
going up today?
Uh, just
a routine milk run.
We'll miss you up there,
Captain Shotgun.
Keep your hand
on the stick.
Hey, your collar, Wolf.
Fix your collar, Wolf.
Gentlemen, don't forget
the fighter pilot's code--
When in doubt,
whip it out.
Take it easy
up there, men.
Take it easy
up there, men.
Easy up there, men.
Shotgun.
That was good,
but we don't salute
indoors.
The patter,
that's pretty common
among pilots?
It must release tension,
stand on defense like that,
locking horns all the time.
The manly banter,
the double entendres.
All the stuff
about penises.
I can use it.
I can use it.
Let's look at this.
It's called
the altitude chamber.
Good morning, Sergeant.
Well, hello.
The sergeant can lower
the air pressure
and oxygen content
to simulate
the environment
while flying.
You're a powerful
young lady.
You have no idea.
Uh, the danger
is hypoxia.
Oxygen deprivation,
lightheadedness,
disorientation.
Sounds, uh, exciting.
It can be.
It kills pilots.
Well, can we
give it a shot?
You sure you want
to do this, now?
Yeah. Be good
experience for the role.
Okay. She's lowering
the oxygen level
to what we'd
be breathing
at 35,000 feet.
What's this?
It's called
a hypoxia worksheet.
Simple questions.
If you can't answer them,
it indicates
you're starting
to be affected.
Take a hit
off the oxygen mask.
Most people can't last
a minute over 20,000 feet.
Besides lightheadedness,
the other symptoms
are giddiness, euphoria,
visual fixations.
It's like being drunk.
Be careful.
They come up fast.
Uh, Sergeant, uh...
You starting
to feel it yet?
No.
The body
starts to release
pent-up gases
at this pressure.
[SNIFFING]
I'll say.
Who squeezed cheese?
All right.
"What's your
mother's name?"
Myra. That's a simple one.
"How many two-cent stamps
in a dozen?"
Twelve.
No fair.
You've done this before.
"If a rooster
lays three eggs
in an hour,
how many
does it lay in a day?"
48. 72.
Roosters don't
lay eggs, dummy.
[LAUGHING]
That's funny, Slade.
You're not feeling
anything?
Nothing? Nothing, huh?
Is it supposed
to have started?
Hmm. Mmm...
Mmm...
What are you humming?
[HUMMING]
Captain. Captain,
take the oxygen.
[SHOTGUN PANTING]
Excuse me.
Mr. Slade,
must you watch everything?
This is fabulous.
The amazing thing is,
these are the kennels.
You're acrobats
in a circus. Really?
You've got
beautiful tents.
Oh, I like
your tents.
Cocktails.
Did I tell you that
I fly jets for a living?
Why did he
invite us here?
Maybe he's
just a nice guy.
Oh, so you
like him now.
Who wouldn't?
Besides,
what do you care?
What do you mean,
Lauren?
Nothing's changed, Paul.
What needs to change?
Your priorities.
There are only
three things
that are important
to you.
Your planes,
your buddies, your planes.
I don't play
third string.
Lauren. Paul.
-So glad you could
make it.
-Hi.
Didn't think I was
going to kiss you,
did you, Paul?
Let me get a look
at you two, huh?
You look great.
I guess
all this merrymaking
must seem like
a big waste of time.
I'm sure you got
more important things
on your mind.
She looks ready to dance.
Shall we?
Absolutely.
You're too uptight.
You need to learn
how to relax.
I mean, remember
the fighter pilot's code.
Screw the rules.
There are more
important things in life.
You know what it is
that really gets me
about Slade?
He's good at everything.
He doesn't even
have to try.
I'm so pissed.
Hey, what do you say
we get out of here, huh?
Uh...
Hey, have you
seen Lauren?
That was
a wonderful party.
-Thank you.
-I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Grazie. Buona sera.
Prego.
People like Slade
should be set on fire.
because he doesn't
know how much of
an asshole he is.
I'd love to see him
lose once.
How do you say, uh...
thank you?
Grazie.
Thanks.
So, how are you
and Paul getting along?
Great. I mean, uh...
The guy's
no intellectual heavyweight,
but I'm learning a lot.
It's so refreshing
to be with someone
who's obviously
never been in therapy.
Maybe I'd better go.
I have to get
some sleep.
Well, it's late,
and I...
Oh, Tom,
this is not
a good idea.
I...
I've really got to go.
I have to go.
Oh, boy.
[ALARM BLARING]
Hey, what's
going on here?
What is this?
Turn it off, man.
All right, everybody out.
Come on.
Take it easy.
I think I know
what the problem is.
Hey, what's going on,
Shotgun?
Relax. I got it.
I got it.
Oh. Actor boy.
Probably smoking in bed.
Mr. Slade. You've been
smoking in bed--
I got it. Oh!
Sorry about that.
Don't go yet.
I have to.
[CHUCKLES] Oh, boy.
Just a little smoke.
No problem.
Getting hot in here.
Good night.
Yeah, it was
a false alarm.
[BANGING]
Oh, Paul.
You're early,
aren't you?
0800 already?
Okay. Give me a sec.
Hey, Shotgun.
Check it out.
Got my silver bars.
What's that mean?
Promotion to lieutenant.
You put them on me.
-Now?
-For luck.
Okay.
Congratulations, Lieutenant.
Thanks, Shotgun.
This nickname
of yours--
Call sign.
Right. Shotgun.
What does that mean?
Nothing. Just, uh,
all pilots have them.
What I mean is,
does it have
a sexual connotation?
Are you just
a really good shot?
Do you have
a bad temper?
What is it?
No. It's nothing
like that.
Well, Paul,
I think I'm starting
to feel my way
into this character.
When he's
in his plane,
he's king
of the mountain,
top dog.
But on the ground,
he's repressed,
a lame-o.
Listen, Mr. Slade--
Tom.
I set up some
combat films for you.
You'll find them
very interesting.
Actually, I thought
I ought to experience
more of the routine.
You know,
pilot for a day.
I want the reality,
the existential qualities.
I think that
can be arranged, Tom.
No, no, no.
Marine-style, Tom.
What does that mean?
Clap your hands
between each push-up.
All right.
Behind your head.
It's the way pilots
do it, Tom.
Make the effort.
Give it a try.
Go ahead.
You want
to be a pilot.
Captain Watkins!
Give me a moment,
Tom, okay?
Keep trying.
What is this, Captain?
Next I'll show him
how to endure
interrogation
behind enemy lines.
-You know,
the electrodes--
-What are you doing?
What were you doing, Lauren?
I don't have
to explain myself to you.
Of course not.
How often will you
get a chance
to sleep
with a movie star?
I'm not going
to talk about this.
I came to tell you
Slade somehow got
authorization to fly.
Slade in a jet
isn't a good idea.
Well, I think
I'm getting it.
Hey, Lauren.
How you doing?
Good news,
Tom, old pal.
Looks like
we're going flying.
That's what I've
been waiting for!
I just have to work out
a few things.
Look, Lauren,
I can count on you,
right, honey?
I'll check with
flight operations.
She's a beautiful
individual.
What a pleasure
to work with, huh?
Hey, Paul,
I'm picking up
negative vibes today.
Is something
bothering you?
What gave you
that idea, Tom?
I'm good
at reading people.
I wish you'd
level with me,
share some things.
Tom,
I think we're sharing
plenty, okay?
Come on, Snake.
Let's go.
You're in for a hell
of a ride today.
Let me ask you--
why do they call him
Shotgun?
[CHUCKLES]
You about ready
there, Tom?
10:30. Let's do it, Snake.
Don't puke
in your oxygen mask.
That's the fighter
pilot's code.
[CLICK]
What's that for?
Never know, Tom.
Don't worry.
I'll bring him back
in one piece.
I was out of line.
Your life
is your business.
I probably would've
done the same thing.
Paul, nothing happened.
Hey, leave it
to Shotgun,
huh, Mr. Slade?
It's okay, Major.
It's a beauty, huh?
Oh, boy.
You're going to
love this, Mr. Slade.
SHOTGUN:
Back seat. Back seat.
Forgot your helmet,
Mr. Slade.
G-suit on the left,
oxygen on the right.
Gum?
Sugarless?
Keeps your ears
from exploding.
Cool.
Strap in.
TOWER:
Bird-Zero-One,
taxi into position
on 2-3 right.
Maintain position
B-number-one for takeoff.
Climb and maintain
2-5,000 feet.
Do not exceed 550 knots,
1-2-1-2-5 after localizing.
Be advised
you have traffic
five miles north of you
at 3-0,000.
You have flown before,
Mr. Slade?
Hundreds of times.
Good. Then takeoff
won't bother you.
Check.
Whoa!
There's an afterburn
in takeoff.
It burns a buttload
of fuel,
but it feels
great, huh?
Uhh.
Mr. Slade,
how you feeling
back there?
Fine! Fine!
Just fine!
Feel that?
We're weightless now.
Yeah.
Get ready.
Negative Gs.
Feel the blood
rushing to your head?
Uh-huh. Uh.
Hey, Tom...
Feel like a pilot yet?
Actually, I think
I'm about to puke.
No.
Aah!
Hey, Slade,
want to try
flying this thing?
Oh!
-Nah.
-Just kidding.
[TOM YELLING]
Hey, Slade, I've been
playing with you,
but you survived
the worst of it.
Want to give it
a try?
It's the best cure
for air sickness.
Are you kidding?
There's nothing to it.
We got dual controls.
I won't let you
get us killed.
It's just
like the simulator,
Mr. Slade.
I'll activate
your controls.
Go easy.
Little moves, okay?
-Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry!
-[BEEPING]
I'm sorry!
Easy, Slade.
I got it.
Don't worry.
[BEEPING STOPS]
It's fun, but not
as easy as it looks.
Base, come in.
This is Blue-two-leader.
Our patrol is
under attack!
-Snake?
Repeat, we're being
fired upon!
We're taking
serious heat here.
I mean
some serious heat!
Bearing 1-3-3
from Checkpoint Bravo.
I have four bad guys.
They're not letting go.
[BEEPING]
Come on, Wolf,
stay with me on this.
We can handle it.
I don't know, Snake.
These guys are good.
I must return fire.
Repeat, I must
return fire. Over.
SHOTGUN: Tower control,
Bird-Zero-One.
I'm approaching
Checkpoint Bravo.
Request permission
to assist.
Negative, Shotgun,
negative.
You are not authorized
to approach the sector.
You have
a civilian aboard.
Return to base.
Base, this is
Bird-Zero-One.
Cannot copy.
I know you can hear me.
Return to base immediately.
SNAKE:
I need help fast!
They're shooting at us!
I'm going ballistic.
Are we at war
or something?
TOWER: Bird-Zero-One,
Bird-Zero-One, acknowledge.
Acknowledge, Shotgun.
Confirm!
Shotgun!
Bird-Zero-One,
confirm!
Aren't you going
to answer them?
I just did.
[BEEPING]
Hey, Paul,
what is this?
It's the real thing.
You kidding?
That's a negative.
My god.
You can't do this.
You can't take me
into combat.
I'll tell them
you followed me.
Put on your mask.
[BEEPING]
Damn it!
This is insane!
The insurance company
will freak out!
You can't do this!
Incoming!
Incoming?
I can't believe this!
You ever been in combat?
No, but it's what
I'm trained for.
[BEEPING]
Slade, what the hell
are you doing?
Let go of the stick!
I'm getting out of here.
It's my life, too!
Let go. You'll kill us.
Let go!
That's it.
When my lawyer
gets through with you,
you'll be lucky
to fly a kite.
SHOTGUN:
Snake, look,
I'm with you. 2:00.
Welcome to the party,
Shotgun.
Why don't you take
one of my friends
for a dance?
I'll lock and load
on number two.
You take number one
for a ride. Over.
Chicken bastards.
[GROANING]
Tom, are you all right?
Damn it!
I swallowed my gum.
I don't believe this.
[BEEPING]
On command,
load one each,
sidewinder
heat-seeking missile.
Arrivederci, paisan.
Mayday, mayday!
I can't get
this guy off me!
Wolf, keep it together.
I'm on the way!
I can't.
I'm taking heat.
I'm hit!
I've been hit!
Hold on.
Stay calm.
Wolf, I'm drawing
on the bad guy.
On my count,
you roll down left.
Three... two...
one... Now!
Whoa! Scratch one!
[LAUGHING]
Whoo! Whoo!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Got another one on me!
He fired!
Oh, no! Aah!
Wolf!
Aah! Aah!
Wolf!
Oh, my god.
Watkins, Watkins!
There's one behind us!
We're going to die!
[BEEPING]
Oh, shit!
Oh.
[BEEPING]
[BEEPING]
Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit!
-Shit! Shit! Shit!
-Shit! Shit! Shit!
-Shit!
-Shit!
[BEEPING]
Slade, we have
to bail out.
Do you remember
the procedure?
I can't remember
my damn name!
[BEEPING]
There's no way
I'm jumping out.
You have to.
No, no, no!
The plane is
going to crash,
and you'll die,
you idiot!
Okay.
[BEEPING]
Bail out. Bail out.
Oh, jeez, Paul, no.
Oh!
Yes!
Don't worry
about it, buddy.
We're going
to get you out.
Oh!
[LAUGHING]
We made contact
with Bogies
and Papa Juliette
right here
and went down
right here.
Now, you said
you saw chutes.
Two of them.
And one's a civilian?
A god-damn movie star.
Sergeant, let her in.
Major, I want
a total media blackout.
If this leaks out,
the Pentagon's gonna
go ape-shit.
Watkins better hope
to hell the pirates
get to him before I do.
Tom Slade should never
have been in that plane.
This is all my fault.
Major Goode, remember,
if Shotgun didn't show up,
I wouldn't be here right now.
MAN: DeCarlo!
Sir.
[HUMMING]
Slade!
What the hell are you doing?
Man, this place is hotter
than palm springs.
If I don't get some sunscreen,
my skin is definitely
going to turn to leather.
Come on.
We got to get moving.
The friendlies should be
over that hill.
Wow. Such a nice plane.
Plenty more where
that came from,
tax dollars at work and all.
TOM: Man, I could use a beer.
A nice, tall, cold,
frosty, icy...
Slade, listen to me!
Try and concentrate.
Ommm.
We've been shot down.
We're in the middle of a desert
in a hostile country.
We have no radio,
maybe 24 hours
worth of water.
We got to focus all our efforts
on survival. Okay?
Damn it!
My hairline's receding!
We got to get started.
What about a rescue?
I mean, if we move,
how will they find us?
I'm not really counting
on a rescue.
This government
has been openly hostile.
Last month they declared
their airspace extended
200 miles.
That's what the dogfight
was all about.
You ought to figure
we're pretty much
on our own, Slade.
Beautiful! We're stranded here
because of some stupid
international piss war!
This is so juvenile!
Hey! My friend is dead.
Look, don't blame yourself.
You did all you could.
Did I?
I don't think so.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
TOM: How far is the border?
SHOTGUN:
Sixty, maybe seventy miles.
Sixty, maybe seventy miles?
Oh, that's great.
That is just great!
I make more a week
than you'll see in your life,
but that's beside the point.
The point is I was making
an effort to ignore
all the crap you did.
I Knew what you were doing.
I tried being nice,
to go along with it.
So what happens? You treat me
like I'm in boot camp,
you fly me into a war.
And now, I'm going to
die like an extra
Lawrence of Arabia!
[SCREAMS]
Let's just walk, okay?
No! I've gotten the strong,
silent treatment from you.
You don't want to know
what I'm thinking!
I hate your guts, Slade, okay?
Okay. That's a start.
You and your
touchy-feely crap.
You are so completely
full of shit.
You want to get inside my head,
understand me, be my friend.
People like you...
Thank you! I mean it!
Thank you. Come here.
Get away from me!
That wall of armor you've built
around your feelings...
You're finally letting in
a little light,
but don't let go now.
Get in touch
with the inner child.
You're really weird, Slade.
You walk into a person's life,
screw everything up,
and then you...
You hug them!
Oh! This has to do
with Lauren.
Okay, I see now. I didn't know
you two were an item.
We're not an item.
-You're an item!
-We're not!
We just get stationed
together, that's all.
She wants to make it more.
But I'm a pilot.
I've got to make flying
my priority!
Why am I talking to you
about this? This is insane.
No, this is good.
This is good!
Because I feel
like we're finally
starting to communicate!
It's beautiful!
Hey! Over here! Hey!
Slade, no!
Hey, over here!
Slade, no!
Let me go!
They were the enemy!
They're your enemy!
They look fine to me.
Stay down.
Let me go!
Hey!
You'd rather die
than ask for help
from this "enemy."
I don't have any enemies.
You're not taking me with you!
Those guys torture people
to death for a living, Slade.
You're the one who's
full of shit, buddy!
-Where you going?
-Away from you!
Yeah? That's the wrong way.
Oh, yeah? Drop dead!
Slade, wait!
Take some water
So I can say
I tried to keep you alive.
Oh, that's beautiful!
I'm touched!
Damn it.
The real thing.
♪ Oh, give me a home ♪
♪ Where the buffalo roam ♪
♪ And the deer
And the antelope play ♪
♪ Where seldom is heard ♪
♪ A discouraging word ♪
♪ And the deer
And the antelope play... ♪
Shit.
[FLIES BUZZING]
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey!
Hey! Over here.
Hey.
Hey! Over here!
Oh, am I glad
to see you.
Do you speak English?
I'm Tom Slade.
Hey, take it easy.
[MEN SPEAKING ARABIC]
Why you doing this?
I got nothing against you.
I'm not a soldier.
I'm an actor.
Very rich. I'll pay you.
Oh, no.
Oh, no?
Please!
MAN: Please!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Go!
I can go?
Go! Thank you!
Thank you.
Thank you.
[GUNSHOTS]
[SCREAMING]
Let's go!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Keep on, let's go!
Who are you people?
We are Bedouin. You American?
That's right. We had trouble
with our plane.
If you'll take us to the border,
we'll make sure you're rewarded
for your kindness.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Yes, we can do that.
MAN: Come.
[COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS]
♪ Well, I like my lovin'
done country-style ♪
♪ And this little girl
will walk a country mile ♪
♪ To find her a good ol'
slow-talkin' country boy ♪
♪ I said a country boy ♪
American cowboy!
♪ I'm about as old-fashioned
As I can be ♪
♪ And I hope you like
What you see ♪
[SINGS ALONG]
If you're lookin' at me
You're lookin' at country
[LAUGHS]
♪ You don't see no city
when you look at me ♪
♪ 'Cause country is all I am ♪
I don't know about you,
but these guys make me nervous.
By the way...
My real name's Greenbaum.
No one's supposed
to know that.
Don't worry, slade.
I'll take it to my grave.
You mind if I bum
one of those?
Tastes like crap.
Thank you.
I don't think I like
where they're taking us.
It doesn't look
like the U.S. Embassy.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Thank you.
[MEN LAUGHING]
Their lunch is ready, sir.
[GASPS]
Your lunch is ready, sir!
Commandant!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Lightning strikes,
Flames of Fury!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Oh, my gosh!
Tom Slade.
COMMANDANT:
But this is absurd.
An American film star.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
I need a shower,
and I need to call my manager.
Shut up, slade.
You mind if I use your phone?
You and your pilot friend
are in very serious trouble.
[GROANS]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[COUGHING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
SHOTGUN:
Who the hell are you?
I'm a pilot.
Just like you.
Call sign Dragon.
You're American.
Can you help me
get out of here?
Perhaps if you record
a statement for them.
You're a god-damn mercenary,
You son of a bitch!
[MOANING]
You killed Wolf.
Yeah. I guess I did.
Hey, you're good,
you know that?
That air force training
really paid off, right?
But that Himmelman move, man.
That went out with disco.
I saw that coming
way before I shot you.
You got lucky, you bastard.
Lucky?
Luck is just the lack of fear.
You seem like, um,
the kind of guy
who flies with one hand
on the ejection lever.
MAN: You can never win
if you're afraid to die.
How can you fly for them?
Everyone's got to
make a living.
Pays a lot better
than Uncle Sam,
I can tell you that.
No urine tests,
no one gives you a hassle
for buzzing the tower.
And they...
...don't have this bug up
their ass about this
20-20 vision thing.
Please. You got to get over
this flag-waving business.
To me, it's all one world.
I just want to fly, man.
I'm genuinely sorry
about they way
they're treating you in here.
A pilot should die
in the air, right?
But this torture shit,
it's...
[DOOR OPENS]
Sorry, pal.
I'm out of here.
Peace.
I don't know about this.
It's simple.
You speak the words.
This is what you do
for a living, isn't it?
Yeah, but come on.
"I see now
that the American
imperialist regime
"must desist crushing innocent
struggling nations
under its iron shoe."
Who writes this shit?
It's not working for me.
Mind if I go with "boot"
instead of "shoe"?
Okay, I can take direction.
Speak the words.
[SHOUTING IN ARABIC]
"This is Tom Slade."
Don't do it, Slade!
Once again.
"This is Tom Slade.
"I'm here
of my own free will.
"I have an important message
for the leaders of the U.S.,
and the peoples of the world."
You guys ought to nuke
this fucking place
off the map!
[ELECTRIC CURRENT BUZZES]
Please, Mr. Slade, I suggest
you take this seriously.
For the sake of your friend.
Slade, don't!
"I see now
that the American
imperialist regime
"must desist crushing innocent
struggling nations
under its iron shoe."
This is terrible.
This is really terrible.
This will kill his career.
Don't worry about that,
everyone will know it's fake.
I'm talking about his reading.
I begged him don't give up
acting lessons.
What does he do?
He wants to trust
his instincts.
Did you see his hair,
the lighting, that shirt?
How did they coerce Tom Slade?
Threatening to take away
his gold card works for me.
You're thinking Shotgun.
TOM: "The aggression
against freedom-loving peoples
is deplorable and must cease.
"America must pay
for its crimes against this
and other sovereign states.
If necessary,
it must pay in blood."
REPORTER: We're going live now
to Casey Farrah, who's outside
the American Embassy.
They're going to blow
your little base off the map.
Cable news.
What would we do without it?
So...
What do you figure?
A couple squadrons
of f-16s for cover,
take out the runway...
Maybe some f-111s drop
a few 1,000-pounders
just for good measure,
you know?
It's going to be
a hell of a party.
I can't wait.
I don't know quite
how to tell you this, but...
They're gonna
execute you at dawn.
As soon as
they get more tape
for their camera.
Listen.
I did all I could do.
It ain't over till it's over.
Very poetic.
But if you're thinking
about a rescue mission,
It won't work.
See, there's only one approach,
and that's through
the Northern Valley.
And they just put
some brand-new SAMs
in their path.
The fine young Nellis graduates
will get their stupid asses
blown right out of the sky.
Capisce?
Kiss my ass.
Want a chip?
DeCarlo guarantees you
heavy triple "A"
in quadrants four and five.
The only safe way in
is through the Northern Valley.
If you encounter hostiles
in this area, you will engage.
Good luck.
Goode.
It's happening, isn't it?
Don't worry, major.
We're going to bring him back.
Come, please.
We are here to rescue you.
[SPEAK INDISTINCTLY]
[SHUSHING]
Quiet. Down.
Wait. My friend Watkins is
in the prison that way.
What about my friend?
He's worth nothing.
Where are you taking me?
The commandant is not fair.
We sell you again
to American movie company.
They pay top dollar.
What?
Hey, you're making a mistake.
Watkins comes
from a very important family.
Wait a second. Wait.
[ENGINE ACCELERATING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Shit.
Shit! Shit!
[ALL LAUGHING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[MEN SCREAMING]
[GUNSHOTS]
Die, infidel!
I'm kidding!
I was kidding! It's a joke!
[SCREAMING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Thanks.
Let's go.
Go!
Do you know what you do?
Of course not.
Go! Go!
The cigarette king!
Give us the cigarette king!
[WATKINS] What are you doing?
No!
Look out! Look out!
Stop, cigarette king!
Hello, my friends.
[SCREAMING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Just go! Keep going!
Look out!
TOM: Shit!
Hey, what the hell is
this cigarette king?
I told them you're heir
to a tobacco fortune.
Improvisation.
If they catch us,
you owe them 50 million.
At least you didn't promise
them anything stupid.
Hold on to me.
Give me a bear hug!
Now!
Last time I hug you.
Katiana control, this is
Black Flag Leader turning
to heading one-zero-niner.
SHOTGUN:
I'm losing my grip.
Come on.
I'm not getting
into another plane with you.
It's the only way out, Slade.
It's because of your flying
that I'm here.
-Okay, fine. Stay.
-What?
-Fine.
-Fine.
Yes.
Fine.
I can handle it. I'm fine.
Just fine. Don't worry about me.
I'm fine.
[GUNSHOTS]
DECARLO: Control, this is
Black Flag Leader.
We are crossing the county line
at Checkpoint Delta.
I see no welcoming committee.
Prepare to arm, gentlemen.
[GUNSHOTS AND EXPLOSIONS]
I changed my mind. Let me in.
It's a single-seater.
Jesus Christ.
I'm real sorry for violating
your personal space.
These stupid French planes!
You can fly this thing,
can't you?
Move your damn leg!
Thanks, slade.
Have you tried
that button over there?
[ENGINES START]
Just shut up.
They are getting away.
I thought we'd give them
a little head start.
More sporting that way,
don't you think?
[LAUGHING]
♪ Off we go ♪
What are you doing?
Going back
to take out the runway.
TOM: What, are you crazy?
They'll shoot us down.
SHOTGUN:
Not if we blow them up first.
[SCREAMING]
-Move your leg.
-What?
Are you sitting on anything
that might be a bomb release?
I think so.
SHOTGUN: Is that it?
SHOTGUN: Is that it?
Whoa!
-Let me do it.
-Fine. Do it!
Your upper lip really perspires
when you're nervous.
SHOTGUN: Get ready.
Okay, I'm ready.
-When? Now?
-No!
-What?
-Not now!
[SCREAMING]
Now!
Now! Now!
Yeah!
Whoo-hoo!
Nice work, Tom.
Thanks.
DECARLO: Katiana control,
this is Black Flag Leader.
Nearing valley approach
at Checkpoint Fox Trot.
Oh, shit. Damn it!
What are you talking about?
Our F-16s are heading
for their missile bases.
Let's hope
they're not ready for us.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
We're coming in. Get ready.
[SLADE YELLS]
What? What?
Charley horse.
Forget about your foot.
No, we're out of bombs.
[ALARM BEEPING]
Shit.
What the...
Hey, Watkins,
it's me, Dragon.
Happy to help you out, Ace.
Now it's just you and me.
An equal match for a change.
So, let's see what you got.
What's going on?
Asshole patrol.
Whoo-hoo!
DRAGON: Come on!
You're playing
with the big boys now.
DRAGON: Come on.
Come on!
Dragon?
Dragon, I know
you can hear me.
SHOTGUN:
Listen, we're both good.
We can play this game
till we run out of gas.
What do you say
we just get it over with?
What do you suggest?
Let's see who's lucky
and who's afraid.
DRAGON: A game of chicken?
Rather crude, but...
Hey, why not?
[SCREAMING]
Whoo-hoo!
Should have had your hand
on eject, Dragon.
DECARLO: Well, looks like
we finally got company.
Could be decoys.
Two and three, stay on target.
DECARLO: Snake is in pursuit!
Damn it.
SHOTGUN: We're friendly.
He doesn't recognize us.
We're being chased
by our own guys?
Yes.
Wouldn't it be ironic
to get killed...
Shut up, Slade!
Time to face mecca, pilgrim.
DECARLO: Himmelman!
Oldest trick in the book.
Hang on!
DECARLO:
Oldest trick in the book!
[ALARM BEEPING]
Shit!
Damn it!
Shit.
Where are the parachute straps?
Katiana control,
this is Black Flag Leader.
DECARLO: I see he hostages
going down in the gulf.
Pull your gun levers, Slade.
It didn't work!
[ALARM CONTINUES BEEPING]
What are we going to do?
Bail out.
We'll free fall.
What?
It's the only way, slade.
We've been pretty
close up here,
so it's a good time to tell you
that you've gone
completely insane!
Paul!
Shotgun!
TOM: Shotgun!
Oh, no.
All right, get a grip.
Get a grip.
[SLADE SCREAMS]
Damn you, Shotgun!
Tell me what to do!
Paul!
TOM: I can't reach the belt!
TOM: I can't believe
I'm doing this.
[SCREAMING]
DECARLO:
What bothers me most...
...is that I didn't have
a chance to say I'm sorry.
That I was the one
who shot down my best friend.
So now, Shotgun...
I am sorry...
...that I was the one
that shot you down.
But it was me
and it was an enemy aircraft.
So if you'd just sign right here
as an observer,
I'll get credit for the kill.
You bastard.
Nice.
Oh, God.
One more, and I'm an Ace.
You two are lucky
to be alive.
Luck had none to do with this.
I knew what I was doing
the whole time.
Burning an aircraft
and blowing the canopy,
although dangerous,
is a proven ejection technique.
You're lucky
we were over the water.
Lucky he didn't just fall out
and leave you strapped in.
I'm just glad to be here.
Where were we?
Very nice.
Useless.
I'm going out
on the flight deck.
Ow!
You kids, don't forget
the fighter pilot's code.
And if you do forget,
name him after me.
Good luck.
Oh, I love this.
Oh, this is a beautiful moment.
I can use this.
Thank you both.
-Tom, shut up.
-Tom, shut up.
A bunch of beautiful moments
strung together, isn't it?
What I mean to say is,
it's about intimacy. Love.
Two people who want
to be together and touch.
It's about
pitching a tent and...
Kids?
TOM: Kids?
It's getting hot in here.
Nurse? Cold shower!
Cold shower!
Nurse!
to Two-Niner-Nancy
at Checkpoint Alpha.
SHOTGUN: I copy, Katiana.
Correct to Two-Niner-Nancy
at Checkpoint Alpha.
DECARLO: Uh, Shotgun,
pardon my thinking,
but that's not exactly
our neighborhood.
SHOTGUN: Bird-Zero-One
to Bird-Zero-Two,
DECARLO:
Spoken like a true milkman,
Captain Shotgun.
Bird-Zero-One,
Bird-Zero-Two,
approaching checkpoint Alpha.
Execute 40-degree turn.
Roger, Shotgun.
Executing 4-0 degree turn.
Radar's clear.
No aircraft in sector.
Now you're talking
my language, Shotgun.
Yo! Ah!
DECARLO: Highly suggest
you get out of autopilot
and start pulling some Gs here.
I think I know my way
around the cockpit, Decarlo.
Wahoo!
[CHUCKLING]
Come on, Decarlo,
that all you've got?
See if the Great Boy
can hit a moving target.
DECARLO: Any time.
There isn't
a barn big enough
that you can hide behind.
DECARLO: Oh, very smart.
Ho ho.
I'm on your six, buddy.
You want regular
or premium?
[LAUGHING]
Hold still.
You're mine.
You're mine, buddy.
Just take it like a man.
Come on.
Hah!
Hold still.
Hold still.
That's a negative.
Where the hell did you go?
Better check
your six, Decarlo.
I got you.
SHOTGUN: Smile.
Smile.
Guns! Guns!
Guns! Guns! Guns!
You're dead, Decarlo.
Yeah.
You got lucky, that's all.
Yeah. Right.
The harder I work,
the luckier I get.
[RADAR BEEPING]
What the hell's going on?
Well, well, well.
Get out the cards.
Looks like we got enough
for a poker game.
Katiana Control,
Bird-Zero-One.
SHOTGUN: Katiana Control,
Bird-Zero-One. Over.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Read you, Bird-Zero-One.
We're being pursued
by hostile aircraft.
Request orders. Over.
KATIANA CONTROL: Do not engage.
Repeat. Do not engage.
Maintain course.
Roger.
[RAPID BEEPING]
Man, I hate that noise.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Bird-Zero-One, Bird-Zero-Two,
hold your course,
Bearing 2-3
off Checkpoint Baker.
Come on, Shotgun,
let's do something.
We have a good signature on it.
Continue to maintain.
Roger.
Doesn't look like these guys
are screwing around,
does it?
Shotgun, I don't like
the feel of this.
These guys are serious.
They're getting close.
SHOTGUN: Steady.
KATIANA CONTROL:
Bird-Zero-One, do not engage.
Repeat. Do not engage.
Maintain--
SHOTGUN:
That's a negative, Decarlo!
Come on, Shotgun, let's fire
some ordnance on these guys.
Maintain wing to wing!
We're over
international waters.
They won't attack.
Shotgun, you better be right,
'cause there's one coming
up on our six.
Whoa!
Jeez!
Look at that crazy
son of a bitch!
[LAUGHING]
Let's go home, Snake.
I know you'd like
nothing more
than to blow
those assholes out of the sky.
They would like nothing more
than to provoke
an international incident.
I mean, anything to fuel
their propaganda war.
Our job is to deny them
that opportunity.
That mirage came
six inches from shearing
off my wing tip.
Decarlo, I don't care
if the guy came,
knocked on your door,
and asked
to take your sister
to a convention
of Hell's Angels.
Until he actually opens fire,
we're to avoid
any provocative action
or reaction.
Captain Watkins,
would you please explain
to Captain Decarlo
how we do things here.
By the book, sir.
By the book.
Are we on
the same frequency?
Yes, sir.
That's good.
Now get your sorry face
out of my sight.
This needs your attention.
Not you, Captain Watkins.
Sir?
Convention of Hell's Angels.
to serve as
the technical adviser
on a movie.
Look, you're the only flier
I've got on this base
that I know won't
embarrass the squadron.
Sounds like
a ground assignment, sir.
Report to Major Goode
in the PA's office.
Major?
Anything wrong, Captain?
No, sir.
Dismissed.
All right, sweetheart--
excuse me-- Major.
This is authorization
from the highest level.
Whoa! You've got
a lot of legs there.
[LAUGHS]
Go ahead.
Read it. Read it.
All right.
Paul Watkins?
Good old Paul Watkins.
Who the hell is he?
I don't know,
but you help us
on this,
it could be big for you.
I'm serious about that.
Really, really big.
Okay?
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
-Come in.
-Come in.
-Sorry.
-Major?
You wanted to see me?
Yes, Captain Watkins.
I'd like you to meet
Mitchell Burton.
How you doing, kid?
I'm Tom Slade's
personal manager.
How you doing?
-Fine.
-Good.
Tom Slade?
Tom Slade, the actor.
Well, let's not push it.
But, I mean,
it's Tom Slade, the star.
The sensation.
Hello?
Are you, uh--
Silent but Deadly?
"D" for Danger?
Lightning Strikes?
Lightning Strikes Again?
-Oh, these are movies.
-Movies. Right.
I've seen that one,
I think.
You think?
That's good.
Yes.
There's-- wait.
Let me--
Let me tell you.
He is perfect.
Yes, it's a cute haircut.
You know,
he's absolutely perfect.
Because Tom wants
somebody that's not
a Hollywood type.
See? Look at him
standing there.
I mean, come on.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
Hold it.
Ever see one
of these things?
Yowee!
Hello.
Tommy! Tom.
Oh, whoa, whoa.
Let me talk to you.
Can you hold on
one second?
We got dinner
tonight at 6:00?
1800, 1900?
What? I never can--
Military things.
It's so--
Yeah? No!
Let me tell you something.
No. I mean, this--
I'm talking--
you're going
to love this
'cause I'm talking
serious reality here.
Yeah. Okay. Sure.
Let me explain it
to you, all right?
Uh-huh.
Tom Slade's starring
as a fighter pilot
in his movie.
You're going to show him
the ropes.
I'm not a babysitter, Lauren.
What's this
really about?
I thought
you'd be thrilled.
You seem thrilled enough
for both of us.
Can I get out of this?
It's just two weeks.
Yeah, but I should be
flying for those weeks.
Please don't make me
pull rank.
I would never do that...
Actually I'm very flattered
that you, uh,
chose me
for this assignment.
Hold it, Mister.
I didn't ask for you
to be assigned
to this detail.
As usual,
someone upstairs
is under the
false impression
that you're qualified.
-Yeah?
-As a pilot.
You'll meet Slade
at dinner tonight.
And after dinner?
Paul...
We've been all over this.
We had fun
back at Subic,
but I can't
do that anymore.
I've got
to be realistic.
All right, Captain?
Is that an order?
Let's just say
it's against regulations.
My regulations.
Yes, sir.
Major.
Lauren, I hate this already.
Read it this afternoon.
We have dinner with Slade
in the mess hall at 1800.
Dismissed.
-[DOOR CLOSES]
-[EXHALES]
Luckily, the truck
that hit him
was a bloodmobile.
He's late, isn't he?
Maybe he won't show.
Hey! Hey, Shotgun.
Heard you guys had
a close call today.
Missed us
by at least six inches.
Yeah? That means
your dick had
five inches to spare.
[CHUCKLES]
[LAUGHING]
Oh!
That's Tom Slade.
[PLATES CRASHING]
Can't believe it.
Hah... that's him.
How you doing?
Oh, I'm a big fan
of yours.
That's good.
Oh, hi...
No, no.
That's all right, honey.
That's, uh--
[CHUCKLES]
He's a good kid,
isn't he?
All right.
We'll be glad
to sign autographs.
Bring them
over to the table
after dinner, all right?
All right.
Here we go.
How you doing,
my friend?
Tom, this is the man
I was telling you about--
Captain Paul Watkins.
Captain, meet Tom Slade.
I don't believe
we've met, have we?
Tom Slade.
Captain Paul Watkins.
Nice to meet you.
Eddie Decarlo.
They call me
the Snake.
I want to say
I'm a big fan of yours.
That one,
Silent but Deadly,
that's one of the all-time--
Hang on a second.
Watch this.
Your lunch
is ready, sir.
[IMITATES GUNSHOTS]
Pfft!
How do you guys
come up with
scenes like that?
We pay screenwriters.
Does everyone
want to sit down?
Come on, honey.
Everybody sit.
Sit down.
Could I get you
something to eat?
What do you want?
I'll surprise you.
That's a good idea.
I need a chair.
Honey, can I use this?
Do you mind?
Nice haircut.
All right. Here we go.
We're all sitting down.
This is good.
This is real good.
It's good.
Captain Watkins
was top of his class
at the academy,
then fighter weapons
school at Nellis,
then Edwards, where he--
Paul-- can I call you Paul?
Of course. He's Paul.
Paul.
I'm very excited
about this part.
You see, I want to get
under the skin
of the fighter jock
mentality.
You know,
the machismo,
the war ethos,
mixing it up
in a dogfight
at 20,000 feet,
putting your life
on the line every day.
You know what I mean.
I'm thinking
it must require
such incredible dedication,
such intense concentration.
That's what I need to get
a handle on.
You know, acting
involves a lot
of self-sacrfice, too.
You have to triumph
over your own ego
to do the job right.
-There's lots--
-Mr. Slade.
Tom.
you're not allowed
to smoke indoors.
Regulations.
Mitch...
Uh...
Uh...
Uh, listen.
Do you have that script?
Have you had
a chance to--
Have you had a chance
to read it at all?
Yes. Yes, I have.
So what'd you think?
Well, there are a few
technical inaccuracies,
little problems, really.
But overall,
what did you think overall?
Um, who cares
what I think?
I'm not a critic, really.
Mitch, correct me
if I'm wrong,
but everyone is a critic.
Everyone--
Everyone.
Okay.
Well, you know,
in the last scene,
a MiG is hit.
Your hero plays with
a heat-seeker, right?
His body's riddled
with bullets,
the plane is going down,
and, you know,
the eject lever
isn't working.
Listen to what
this guy says.
"I'm not going
to make it.
I'm going down.
Tell the boys
not to worry about me.
I'll be flying higher
than I ever flew before...
[IMPERSONATING JOHN WAYNE]
straight into the sun."
That's John Wayne.
Are you suggesting
it's not that realistic?
It's supposed
to have a, you know,
mythic quality.
I don't think
Captain Watkins
is suggesting--
What would you say then?
I guess--
I guess it's okay
for your movie.
No, what would you say?
If I was going to die,
and my jet's going down?
Something more like, uh...
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
Right.
Captain...
Pardon me, Major.
[ALL LAUGHING]
No. I like that.
I like that.
Pencil that in, Mitch.
Shit, shit, shit?
You want me to
pencil in "Shit, shit, shit"?
-Yeah.
-Okay. Got it.
Excuse me.
Wasn't sure
what you wanted.
I got a little
of everything.
Thank you, Captain.
Yeah. Sure.
Well...
Where was I?
Uh, Tommy...
When he prepared
for Flames of Fury,
he rode the fire truck
for how long?
Three months.
See, I deal
in experiences.
I find that
thorough research
and finding the right
role model is the key.
Oh, yeah.
Do you know what?
We should get going.
Shall we go, General?
Mm-hmm.
I'll lead the way.
Here we go.
Paul, it's going
to be great
working with you.
Oh...
Regulations.
Should be an experience.
Three months.
WOMAN: I've seen
all his movies.
I like him.
Low-key but with
quiet intensity.
He's a lot younger
than I expected.
It's exactly
what I expected.
MITCHELL: Fuck him.
Fuck him.
Just fuck him!
Right. Hold on.
-Morning, Captain.
-Morning, sir.
I just want to say
what he's going
to say to you.
No. No.
Let that little prick
do what he wants.
Hold on.
We really should
be going, sir.
I'm going to have
to call you back.
No, you're right.
Fuck him!
Right. Bye, Mom.
Kiss, kiss.
My mom.
Ah, dear.
You know...
I got to ask you
a favor
about, uh, Tommy.
I know he's hard
to take at times.
But he can be
a real sweetheart.
I don't want him to do
anything too stupid.
Know what I mean?
I understand.
You're beautiful!
I love you.
Hey, come on.
It's a figure of speech,
all right?
Hey, coming
to our party tonight?
Got anything
else to wear
besides this stuff?
I mean something
alive, bright.
Ah...
You look... Oh.
Allow me.
Get up!
The only thing
that works.
Good morning.
What time is it?
0800.
0800? You guys really
talk like that?
Yes.
Give me a sec.
Yeah, but--
We fly cover
for the whole
Mediterranean from here.
That's South Europe,
North Africa,
and the Persian Gulf.
[JET ROARING]
We fly the F-16 Falcon,
which faded out
the old F-4 Phantom.
Morning, sir!
Wait. Wait. Hold it.
-How'd you do that?
-What?
The salute-- is there
something special
about the number
like air force versus army?
-Salute.
-Just salute.
Okay. I'm getting it.
I'm feeling it.
-Congratulations.
-Thanks.
What's it like
sitting in an F-14?
16-- whatever.
I'm not good
with numbers.
Can we do this?
Tom, that's not so easy.
[BEEPING]
Here it comes.
All right, baby.
Come on.
Let's go.
I got you.
Come on here.
[BEEP]
[WHOOPING]
Not bad.
Not bad?
He's doing great.
I've never seen anybody
get the hang of this
so quickly.
Don't get carried away.
Lucky shot.
Yeah? Let's see
what he can do.
Come on.
Come on, baby.
Got to bring some
to get some.
Throw me a curve now, huh?
All right. Got it!
[LAUGHING]
I don't believe it.
Whoo!
I've always had
extremely good
hand-eye coordination.
Flying these airplanes
is a lot like
a video game.
There's more to it
than that.
What I need to do
is fly,
get up there and see
what it's really like.
They'll never give
you authorization
to do that.
Right.
We're about to see
the debriefing room
and flight control.
That's the F-14.
F-18.
Stealth...
Fighter.
Good morning,
Mr. Slade.
[WHISTLING]
You guys
going up today?
Uh, just
a routine milk run.
We'll miss you up there,
Captain Shotgun.
Keep your hand
on the stick.
Hey, your collar, Wolf.
Fix your collar, Wolf.
Gentlemen, don't forget
the fighter pilot's code--
When in doubt,
whip it out.
Take it easy
up there, men.
Take it easy
up there, men.
Easy up there, men.
Shotgun.
That was good,
but we don't salute
indoors.
The patter,
that's pretty common
among pilots?
It must release tension,
stand on defense like that,
locking horns all the time.
The manly banter,
the double entendres.
All the stuff
about penises.
I can use it.
I can use it.
Let's look at this.
It's called
the altitude chamber.
Good morning, Sergeant.
Well, hello.
The sergeant can lower
the air pressure
and oxygen content
to simulate
the environment
while flying.
You're a powerful
young lady.
You have no idea.
Uh, the danger
is hypoxia.
Oxygen deprivation,
lightheadedness,
disorientation.
Sounds, uh, exciting.
It can be.
It kills pilots.
Well, can we
give it a shot?
You sure you want
to do this, now?
Yeah. Be good
experience for the role.
Okay. She's lowering
the oxygen level
to what we'd
be breathing
at 35,000 feet.
What's this?
It's called
a hypoxia worksheet.
Simple questions.
If you can't answer them,
it indicates
you're starting
to be affected.
Take a hit
off the oxygen mask.
Most people can't last
a minute over 20,000 feet.
Besides lightheadedness,
the other symptoms
are giddiness, euphoria,
visual fixations.
It's like being drunk.
Be careful.
They come up fast.
Uh, Sergeant, uh...
You starting
to feel it yet?
No.
The body
starts to release
pent-up gases
at this pressure.
[SNIFFING]
I'll say.
Who squeezed cheese?
All right.
"What's your
mother's name?"
Myra. That's a simple one.
"How many two-cent stamps
in a dozen?"
Twelve.
No fair.
You've done this before.
"If a rooster
lays three eggs
in an hour,
how many
does it lay in a day?"
48. 72.
Roosters don't
lay eggs, dummy.
[LAUGHING]
That's funny, Slade.
You're not feeling
anything?
Nothing? Nothing, huh?
Is it supposed
to have started?
Hmm. Mmm...
Mmm...
What are you humming?
[HUMMING]
Captain. Captain,
take the oxygen.
[SHOTGUN PANTING]
Excuse me.
Mr. Slade,
must you watch everything?
This is fabulous.
The amazing thing is,
these are the kennels.
You're acrobats
in a circus. Really?
You've got
beautiful tents.
Oh, I like
your tents.
Cocktails.
Did I tell you that
I fly jets for a living?
Why did he
invite us here?
Maybe he's
just a nice guy.
Oh, so you
like him now.
Who wouldn't?
Besides,
what do you care?
What do you mean,
Lauren?
Nothing's changed, Paul.
What needs to change?
Your priorities.
There are only
three things
that are important
to you.
Your planes,
your buddies, your planes.
I don't play
third string.
Lauren. Paul.
-So glad you could
make it.
-Hi.
Didn't think I was
going to kiss you,
did you, Paul?
Let me get a look
at you two, huh?
You look great.
I guess
all this merrymaking
must seem like
a big waste of time.
I'm sure you got
more important things
on your mind.
She looks ready to dance.
Shall we?
Absolutely.
You're too uptight.
You need to learn
how to relax.
I mean, remember
the fighter pilot's code.
Screw the rules.
There are more
important things in life.
You know what it is
that really gets me
about Slade?
He's good at everything.
He doesn't even
have to try.
I'm so pissed.
Hey, what do you say
we get out of here, huh?
Uh...
Hey, have you
seen Lauren?
That was
a wonderful party.
-Thank you.
-I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Grazie. Buona sera.
Prego.
People like Slade
should be set on fire.
because he doesn't
know how much of
an asshole he is.
I'd love to see him
lose once.
How do you say, uh...
thank you?
Grazie.
Thanks.
So, how are you
and Paul getting along?
Great. I mean, uh...
The guy's
no intellectual heavyweight,
but I'm learning a lot.
It's so refreshing
to be with someone
who's obviously
never been in therapy.
Maybe I'd better go.
I have to get
some sleep.
Well, it's late,
and I...
Oh, Tom,
this is not
a good idea.
I...
I've really got to go.
I have to go.
Oh, boy.
[ALARM BLARING]
Hey, what's
going on here?
What is this?
Turn it off, man.
All right, everybody out.
Come on.
Take it easy.
I think I know
what the problem is.
Hey, what's going on,
Shotgun?
Relax. I got it.
I got it.
Oh. Actor boy.
Probably smoking in bed.
Mr. Slade. You've been
smoking in bed--
I got it. Oh!
Sorry about that.
Don't go yet.
I have to.
[CHUCKLES] Oh, boy.
Just a little smoke.
No problem.
Getting hot in here.
Good night.
Yeah, it was
a false alarm.
[BANGING]
Oh, Paul.
You're early,
aren't you?
0800 already?
Okay. Give me a sec.
Hey, Shotgun.
Check it out.
Got my silver bars.
What's that mean?
Promotion to lieutenant.
You put them on me.
-Now?
-For luck.
Okay.
Congratulations, Lieutenant.
Thanks, Shotgun.
This nickname
of yours--
Call sign.
Right. Shotgun.
What does that mean?
Nothing. Just, uh,
all pilots have them.
What I mean is,
does it have
a sexual connotation?
Are you just
a really good shot?
Do you have
a bad temper?
What is it?
No. It's nothing
like that.
Well, Paul,
I think I'm starting
to feel my way
into this character.
When he's
in his plane,
he's king
of the mountain,
top dog.
But on the ground,
he's repressed,
a lame-o.
Listen, Mr. Slade--
Tom.
I set up some
combat films for you.
You'll find them
very interesting.
Actually, I thought
I ought to experience
more of the routine.
You know,
pilot for a day.
I want the reality,
the existential qualities.
I think that
can be arranged, Tom.
No, no, no.
Marine-style, Tom.
What does that mean?
Clap your hands
between each push-up.
All right.
Behind your head.
It's the way pilots
do it, Tom.
Make the effort.
Give it a try.
Go ahead.
You want
to be a pilot.
Captain Watkins!
Give me a moment,
Tom, okay?
Keep trying.
What is this, Captain?
Next I'll show him
how to endure
interrogation
behind enemy lines.
-You know,
the electrodes--
-What are you doing?
What were you doing, Lauren?
I don't have
to explain myself to you.
Of course not.
How often will you
get a chance
to sleep
with a movie star?
I'm not going
to talk about this.
I came to tell you
Slade somehow got
authorization to fly.
Slade in a jet
isn't a good idea.
Well, I think
I'm getting it.
Hey, Lauren.
How you doing?
Good news,
Tom, old pal.
Looks like
we're going flying.
That's what I've
been waiting for!
I just have to work out
a few things.
Look, Lauren,
I can count on you,
right, honey?
I'll check with
flight operations.
She's a beautiful
individual.
What a pleasure
to work with, huh?
Hey, Paul,
I'm picking up
negative vibes today.
Is something
bothering you?
What gave you
that idea, Tom?
I'm good
at reading people.
I wish you'd
level with me,
share some things.
Tom,
I think we're sharing
plenty, okay?
Come on, Snake.
Let's go.
You're in for a hell
of a ride today.
Let me ask you--
why do they call him
Shotgun?
[CHUCKLES]
You about ready
there, Tom?
10:30. Let's do it, Snake.
Don't puke
in your oxygen mask.
That's the fighter
pilot's code.
[CLICK]
What's that for?
Never know, Tom.
Don't worry.
I'll bring him back
in one piece.
I was out of line.
Your life
is your business.
I probably would've
done the same thing.
Paul, nothing happened.
Hey, leave it
to Shotgun,
huh, Mr. Slade?
It's okay, Major.
It's a beauty, huh?
Oh, boy.
You're going to
love this, Mr. Slade.
SHOTGUN:
Back seat. Back seat.
Forgot your helmet,
Mr. Slade.
G-suit on the left,
oxygen on the right.
Gum?
Sugarless?
Keeps your ears
from exploding.
Cool.
Strap in.
TOWER:
Bird-Zero-One,
taxi into position
on 2-3 right.
Maintain position
B-number-one for takeoff.
Climb and maintain
2-5,000 feet.
Do not exceed 550 knots,
1-2-1-2-5 after localizing.
Be advised
you have traffic
five miles north of you
at 3-0,000.
You have flown before,
Mr. Slade?
Hundreds of times.
Good. Then takeoff
won't bother you.
Check.
Whoa!
There's an afterburn
in takeoff.
It burns a buttload
of fuel,
but it feels
great, huh?
Uhh.
Mr. Slade,
how you feeling
back there?
Fine! Fine!
Just fine!
Feel that?
We're weightless now.
Yeah.
Get ready.
Negative Gs.
Feel the blood
rushing to your head?
Uh-huh. Uh.
Hey, Tom...
Feel like a pilot yet?
Actually, I think
I'm about to puke.
No.
Aah!
Hey, Slade,
want to try
flying this thing?
Oh!
-Nah.
-Just kidding.
[TOM YELLING]
Hey, Slade, I've been
playing with you,
but you survived
the worst of it.
Want to give it
a try?
It's the best cure
for air sickness.
Are you kidding?
There's nothing to it.
We got dual controls.
I won't let you
get us killed.
It's just
like the simulator,
Mr. Slade.
I'll activate
your controls.
Go easy.
Little moves, okay?
-Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry!
-[BEEPING]
I'm sorry!
Easy, Slade.
I got it.
Don't worry.
[BEEPING STOPS]
It's fun, but not
as easy as it looks.
Base, come in.
This is Blue-two-leader.
Our patrol is
under attack!
-Snake?
Repeat, we're being
fired upon!
We're taking
serious heat here.
I mean
some serious heat!
Bearing 1-3-3
from Checkpoint Bravo.
I have four bad guys.
They're not letting go.
[BEEPING]
Come on, Wolf,
stay with me on this.
We can handle it.
I don't know, Snake.
These guys are good.
I must return fire.
Repeat, I must
return fire. Over.
SHOTGUN: Tower control,
Bird-Zero-One.
I'm approaching
Checkpoint Bravo.
Request permission
to assist.
Negative, Shotgun,
negative.
You are not authorized
to approach the sector.
You have
a civilian aboard.
Return to base.
Base, this is
Bird-Zero-One.
Cannot copy.
I know you can hear me.
Return to base immediately.
SNAKE:
I need help fast!
They're shooting at us!
I'm going ballistic.
Are we at war
or something?
TOWER: Bird-Zero-One,
Bird-Zero-One, acknowledge.
Acknowledge, Shotgun.
Confirm!
Shotgun!
Bird-Zero-One,
confirm!
Aren't you going
to answer them?
I just did.
[BEEPING]
Hey, Paul,
what is this?
It's the real thing.
You kidding?
That's a negative.
My god.
You can't do this.
You can't take me
into combat.
I'll tell them
you followed me.
Put on your mask.
[BEEPING]
Damn it!
This is insane!
The insurance company
will freak out!
You can't do this!
Incoming!
Incoming?
I can't believe this!
You ever been in combat?
No, but it's what
I'm trained for.
[BEEPING]
Slade, what the hell
are you doing?
Let go of the stick!
I'm getting out of here.
It's my life, too!
Let go. You'll kill us.
Let go!
That's it.
When my lawyer
gets through with you,
you'll be lucky
to fly a kite.
SHOTGUN:
Snake, look,
I'm with you. 2:00.
Welcome to the party,
Shotgun.
Why don't you take
one of my friends
for a dance?
I'll lock and load
on number two.
You take number one
for a ride. Over.
Chicken bastards.
[GROANING]
Tom, are you all right?
Damn it!
I swallowed my gum.
I don't believe this.
[BEEPING]
On command,
load one each,
sidewinder
heat-seeking missile.
Arrivederci, paisan.
Mayday, mayday!
I can't get
this guy off me!
Wolf, keep it together.
I'm on the way!
I can't.
I'm taking heat.
I'm hit!
I've been hit!
Hold on.
Stay calm.
Wolf, I'm drawing
on the bad guy.
On my count,
you roll down left.
Three... two...
one... Now!
Whoa! Scratch one!
[LAUGHING]
Whoo! Whoo!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Got another one on me!
He fired!
Oh, no! Aah!
Wolf!
Aah! Aah!
Wolf!
Oh, my god.
Watkins, Watkins!
There's one behind us!
We're going to die!
[BEEPING]
Oh, shit!
Oh.
[BEEPING]
[BEEPING]
Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit!
Shit! Shit!
-Shit! Shit! Shit!
-Shit! Shit! Shit!
-Shit!
-Shit!
[BEEPING]
Slade, we have
to bail out.
Do you remember
the procedure?
I can't remember
my damn name!
[BEEPING]
There's no way
I'm jumping out.
You have to.
No, no, no!
The plane is
going to crash,
and you'll die,
you idiot!
Okay.
[BEEPING]
Bail out. Bail out.
Oh, jeez, Paul, no.
Oh!
Yes!
Don't worry
about it, buddy.
We're going
to get you out.
Oh!
[LAUGHING]
We made contact
with Bogies
and Papa Juliette
right here
and went down
right here.
Now, you said
you saw chutes.
Two of them.
And one's a civilian?
A god-damn movie star.
Sergeant, let her in.
Major, I want
a total media blackout.
If this leaks out,
the Pentagon's gonna
go ape-shit.
Watkins better hope
to hell the pirates
get to him before I do.
Tom Slade should never
have been in that plane.
This is all my fault.
Major Goode, remember,
if Shotgun didn't show up,
I wouldn't be here right now.
MAN: DeCarlo!
Sir.
[HUMMING]
Slade!
What the hell are you doing?
Man, this place is hotter
than palm springs.
If I don't get some sunscreen,
my skin is definitely
going to turn to leather.
Come on.
We got to get moving.
The friendlies should be
over that hill.
Wow. Such a nice plane.
Plenty more where
that came from,
tax dollars at work and all.
TOM: Man, I could use a beer.
A nice, tall, cold,
frosty, icy...
Slade, listen to me!
Try and concentrate.
Ommm.
We've been shot down.
We're in the middle of a desert
in a hostile country.
We have no radio,
maybe 24 hours
worth of water.
We got to focus all our efforts
on survival. Okay?
Damn it!
My hairline's receding!
We got to get started.
What about a rescue?
I mean, if we move,
how will they find us?
I'm not really counting
on a rescue.
This government
has been openly hostile.
Last month they declared
their airspace extended
200 miles.
That's what the dogfight
was all about.
You ought to figure
we're pretty much
on our own, Slade.
Beautiful! We're stranded here
because of some stupid
international piss war!
This is so juvenile!
Hey! My friend is dead.
Look, don't blame yourself.
You did all you could.
Did I?
I don't think so.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
TOM: How far is the border?
SHOTGUN:
Sixty, maybe seventy miles.
Sixty, maybe seventy miles?
Oh, that's great.
That is just great!
I make more a week
than you'll see in your life,
but that's beside the point.
The point is I was making
an effort to ignore
all the crap you did.
I Knew what you were doing.
I tried being nice,
to go along with it.
So what happens? You treat me
like I'm in boot camp,
you fly me into a war.
And now, I'm going to
die like an extra
Lawrence of Arabia!
[SCREAMS]
Let's just walk, okay?
No! I've gotten the strong,
silent treatment from you.
You don't want to know
what I'm thinking!
I hate your guts, Slade, okay?
Okay. That's a start.
You and your
touchy-feely crap.
You are so completely
full of shit.
You want to get inside my head,
understand me, be my friend.
People like you...
Thank you! I mean it!
Thank you. Come here.
Get away from me!
That wall of armor you've built
around your feelings...
You're finally letting in
a little light,
but don't let go now.
Get in touch
with the inner child.
You're really weird, Slade.
You walk into a person's life,
screw everything up,
and then you...
You hug them!
Oh! This has to do
with Lauren.
Okay, I see now. I didn't know
you two were an item.
We're not an item.
-You're an item!
-We're not!
We just get stationed
together, that's all.
She wants to make it more.
But I'm a pilot.
I've got to make flying
my priority!
Why am I talking to you
about this? This is insane.
No, this is good.
This is good!
Because I feel
like we're finally
starting to communicate!
It's beautiful!
Hey! Over here! Hey!
Slade, no!
Hey, over here!
Slade, no!
Let me go!
They were the enemy!
They're your enemy!
They look fine to me.
Stay down.
Let me go!
Hey!
You'd rather die
than ask for help
from this "enemy."
I don't have any enemies.
You're not taking me with you!
Those guys torture people
to death for a living, Slade.
You're the one who's
full of shit, buddy!
-Where you going?
-Away from you!
Yeah? That's the wrong way.
Oh, yeah? Drop dead!
Slade, wait!
Take some water
So I can say
I tried to keep you alive.
Oh, that's beautiful!
I'm touched!
Damn it.
The real thing.
♪ Oh, give me a home ♪
♪ Where the buffalo roam ♪
♪ And the deer
And the antelope play ♪
♪ Where seldom is heard ♪
♪ A discouraging word ♪
♪ And the deer
And the antelope play... ♪
Shit.
[FLIES BUZZING]
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey!
Hey! Over here.
Hey.
Hey! Over here!
Oh, am I glad
to see you.
Do you speak English?
I'm Tom Slade.
Hey, take it easy.
[MEN SPEAKING ARABIC]
Why you doing this?
I got nothing against you.
I'm not a soldier.
I'm an actor.
Very rich. I'll pay you.
Oh, no.
Oh, no?
Please!
MAN: Please!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Go!
I can go?
Go! Thank you!
Thank you.
Thank you.
[GUNSHOTS]
[SCREAMING]
Let's go!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Keep on, let's go!
Who are you people?
We are Bedouin. You American?
That's right. We had trouble
with our plane.
If you'll take us to the border,
we'll make sure you're rewarded
for your kindness.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Yes, we can do that.
MAN: Come.
[COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS]
♪ Well, I like my lovin'
done country-style ♪
♪ And this little girl
will walk a country mile ♪
♪ To find her a good ol'
slow-talkin' country boy ♪
♪ I said a country boy ♪
American cowboy!
♪ I'm about as old-fashioned
As I can be ♪
♪ And I hope you like
What you see ♪
[SINGS ALONG]
If you're lookin' at me
You're lookin' at country
[LAUGHS]
♪ You don't see no city
when you look at me ♪
♪ 'Cause country is all I am ♪
I don't know about you,
but these guys make me nervous.
By the way...
My real name's Greenbaum.
No one's supposed
to know that.
Don't worry, slade.
I'll take it to my grave.
You mind if I bum
one of those?
Tastes like crap.
Thank you.
I don't think I like
where they're taking us.
It doesn't look
like the U.S. Embassy.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Thank you.
[MEN LAUGHING]
Their lunch is ready, sir.
[GASPS]
Your lunch is ready, sir!
Commandant!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Lightning strikes,
Flames of Fury!
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
MAN: Oh, my gosh!
Tom Slade.
COMMANDANT:
But this is absurd.
An American film star.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
I need a shower,
and I need to call my manager.
Shut up, slade.
You mind if I use your phone?
You and your pilot friend
are in very serious trouble.
[GROANS]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[COUGHING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
SHOTGUN:
Who the hell are you?
I'm a pilot.
Just like you.
Call sign Dragon.
You're American.
Can you help me
get out of here?
Perhaps if you record
a statement for them.
You're a god-damn mercenary,
You son of a bitch!
[MOANING]
You killed Wolf.
Yeah. I guess I did.
Hey, you're good,
you know that?
That air force training
really paid off, right?
But that Himmelman move, man.
That went out with disco.
I saw that coming
way before I shot you.
You got lucky, you bastard.
Lucky?
Luck is just the lack of fear.
You seem like, um,
the kind of guy
who flies with one hand
on the ejection lever.
MAN: You can never win
if you're afraid to die.
How can you fly for them?
Everyone's got to
make a living.
Pays a lot better
than Uncle Sam,
I can tell you that.
No urine tests,
no one gives you a hassle
for buzzing the tower.
And they...
...don't have this bug up
their ass about this
20-20 vision thing.
Please. You got to get over
this flag-waving business.
To me, it's all one world.
I just want to fly, man.
I'm genuinely sorry
about they way
they're treating you in here.
A pilot should die
in the air, right?
But this torture shit,
it's...
[DOOR OPENS]
Sorry, pal.
I'm out of here.
Peace.
I don't know about this.
It's simple.
You speak the words.
This is what you do
for a living, isn't it?
Yeah, but come on.
"I see now
that the American
imperialist regime
"must desist crushing innocent
struggling nations
under its iron shoe."
Who writes this shit?
It's not working for me.
Mind if I go with "boot"
instead of "shoe"?
Okay, I can take direction.
Speak the words.
[SHOUTING IN ARABIC]
"This is Tom Slade."
Don't do it, Slade!
Once again.
"This is Tom Slade.
"I'm here
of my own free will.
"I have an important message
for the leaders of the U.S.,
and the peoples of the world."
You guys ought to nuke
this fucking place
off the map!
[ELECTRIC CURRENT BUZZES]
Please, Mr. Slade, I suggest
you take this seriously.
For the sake of your friend.
Slade, don't!
"I see now
that the American
imperialist regime
"must desist crushing innocent
struggling nations
under its iron shoe."
This is terrible.
This is really terrible.
This will kill his career.
Don't worry about that,
everyone will know it's fake.
I'm talking about his reading.
I begged him don't give up
acting lessons.
What does he do?
He wants to trust
his instincts.
Did you see his hair,
the lighting, that shirt?
How did they coerce Tom Slade?
Threatening to take away
his gold card works for me.
You're thinking Shotgun.
TOM: "The aggression
against freedom-loving peoples
is deplorable and must cease.
"America must pay
for its crimes against this
and other sovereign states.
If necessary,
it must pay in blood."
REPORTER: We're going live now
to Casey Farrah, who's outside
the American Embassy.
They're going to blow
your little base off the map.
Cable news.
What would we do without it?
So...
What do you figure?
A couple squadrons
of f-16s for cover,
take out the runway...
Maybe some f-111s drop
a few 1,000-pounders
just for good measure,
you know?
It's going to be
a hell of a party.
I can't wait.
I don't know quite
how to tell you this, but...
They're gonna
execute you at dawn.
As soon as
they get more tape
for their camera.
Listen.
I did all I could do.
It ain't over till it's over.
Very poetic.
But if you're thinking
about a rescue mission,
It won't work.
See, there's only one approach,
and that's through
the Northern Valley.
And they just put
some brand-new SAMs
in their path.
The fine young Nellis graduates
will get their stupid asses
blown right out of the sky.
Capisce?
Kiss my ass.
Want a chip?
DeCarlo guarantees you
heavy triple "A"
in quadrants four and five.
The only safe way in
is through the Northern Valley.
If you encounter hostiles
in this area, you will engage.
Good luck.
Goode.
It's happening, isn't it?
Don't worry, major.
We're going to bring him back.
Come, please.
We are here to rescue you.
[SPEAK INDISTINCTLY]
[SHUSHING]
Quiet. Down.
Wait. My friend Watkins is
in the prison that way.
What about my friend?
He's worth nothing.
Where are you taking me?
The commandant is not fair.
We sell you again
to American movie company.
They pay top dollar.
What?
Hey, you're making a mistake.
Watkins comes
from a very important family.
Wait a second. Wait.
[ENGINE ACCELERATING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Shit.
Shit! Shit!
[ALL LAUGHING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
[MEN SCREAMING]
[GUNSHOTS]
Die, infidel!
I'm kidding!
I was kidding! It's a joke!
[SCREAMING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Thanks.
Let's go.
Go!
Do you know what you do?
Of course not.
Go! Go!
The cigarette king!
Give us the cigarette king!
[WATKINS] What are you doing?
No!
Look out! Look out!
Stop, cigarette king!
Hello, my friends.
[SCREAMING]
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
Just go! Keep going!
Look out!
TOM: Shit!
Hey, what the hell is
this cigarette king?
I told them you're heir
to a tobacco fortune.
Improvisation.
If they catch us,
you owe them 50 million.
At least you didn't promise
them anything stupid.
Hold on to me.
Give me a bear hug!
Now!
Last time I hug you.
Katiana control, this is
Black Flag Leader turning
to heading one-zero-niner.
SHOTGUN:
I'm losing my grip.
Come on.
I'm not getting
into another plane with you.
It's the only way out, Slade.
It's because of your flying
that I'm here.
-Okay, fine. Stay.
-What?
-Fine.
-Fine.
Yes.
Fine.
I can handle it. I'm fine.
Just fine. Don't worry about me.
I'm fine.
[GUNSHOTS]
DECARLO: Control, this is
Black Flag Leader.
We are crossing the county line
at Checkpoint Delta.
I see no welcoming committee.
Prepare to arm, gentlemen.
[GUNSHOTS AND EXPLOSIONS]
I changed my mind. Let me in.
It's a single-seater.
Jesus Christ.
I'm real sorry for violating
your personal space.
These stupid French planes!
You can fly this thing,
can't you?
Move your damn leg!
Thanks, slade.
Have you tried
that button over there?
[ENGINES START]
Just shut up.
They are getting away.
I thought we'd give them
a little head start.
More sporting that way,
don't you think?
[LAUGHING]
♪ Off we go ♪
What are you doing?
Going back
to take out the runway.
TOM: What, are you crazy?
They'll shoot us down.
SHOTGUN:
Not if we blow them up first.
[SCREAMING]
-Move your leg.
-What?
Are you sitting on anything
that might be a bomb release?
I think so.
SHOTGUN: Is that it?
SHOTGUN: Is that it?
Whoa!
-Let me do it.
-Fine. Do it!
Your upper lip really perspires
when you're nervous.
SHOTGUN: Get ready.
Okay, I'm ready.
-When? Now?
-No!
-What?
-Not now!
[SCREAMING]
Now!
Now! Now!
Yeah!
Whoo-hoo!
Nice work, Tom.
Thanks.
DECARLO: Katiana control,
this is Black Flag Leader.
Nearing valley approach
at Checkpoint Fox Trot.
Oh, shit. Damn it!
What are you talking about?
Our F-16s are heading
for their missile bases.
Let's hope
they're not ready for us.
[SPEAKING ARABIC]
We're coming in. Get ready.
[SLADE YELLS]
What? What?
Charley horse.
Forget about your foot.
No, we're out of bombs.
[ALARM BEEPING]
Shit.
What the...
Hey, Watkins,
it's me, Dragon.
Happy to help you out, Ace.
Now it's just you and me.
An equal match for a change.
So, let's see what you got.
What's going on?
Asshole patrol.
Whoo-hoo!
DRAGON: Come on!
You're playing
with the big boys now.
DRAGON: Come on.
Come on!
Dragon?
Dragon, I know
you can hear me.
SHOTGUN:
Listen, we're both good.
We can play this game
till we run out of gas.
What do you say
we just get it over with?
What do you suggest?
Let's see who's lucky
and who's afraid.
DRAGON: A game of chicken?
Rather crude, but...
Hey, why not?
[SCREAMING]
Whoo-hoo!
Should have had your hand
on eject, Dragon.
DECARLO: Well, looks like
we finally got company.
Could be decoys.
Two and three, stay on target.
DECARLO: Snake is in pursuit!
Damn it.
SHOTGUN: We're friendly.
He doesn't recognize us.
We're being chased
by our own guys?
Yes.
Wouldn't it be ironic
to get killed...
Shut up, Slade!
Time to face mecca, pilgrim.
DECARLO: Himmelman!
Oldest trick in the book.
Hang on!
DECARLO:
Oldest trick in the book!
[ALARM BEEPING]
Shit!
Damn it!
Shit.
Where are the parachute straps?
Katiana control,
this is Black Flag Leader.
DECARLO: I see he hostages
going down in the gulf.
Pull your gun levers, Slade.
It didn't work!
[ALARM CONTINUES BEEPING]
What are we going to do?
Bail out.
We'll free fall.
What?
It's the only way, slade.
We've been pretty
close up here,
so it's a good time to tell you
that you've gone
completely insane!
Paul!
Shotgun!
TOM: Shotgun!
Oh, no.
All right, get a grip.
Get a grip.
[SLADE SCREAMS]
Damn you, Shotgun!
Tell me what to do!
Paul!
TOM: I can't reach the belt!
TOM: I can't believe
I'm doing this.
[SCREAMING]
DECARLO:
What bothers me most...
...is that I didn't have
a chance to say I'm sorry.
That I was the one
who shot down my best friend.
So now, Shotgun...
I am sorry...
...that I was the one
that shot you down.
But it was me
and it was an enemy aircraft.
So if you'd just sign right here
as an observer,
I'll get credit for the kill.
You bastard.
Nice.
Oh, God.
One more, and I'm an Ace.
You two are lucky
to be alive.
Luck had none to do with this.
I knew what I was doing
the whole time.
Burning an aircraft
and blowing the canopy,
although dangerous,
is a proven ejection technique.
You're lucky
we were over the water.
Lucky he didn't just fall out
and leave you strapped in.
I'm just glad to be here.
Where were we?
Very nice.
Useless.
I'm going out
on the flight deck.
Ow!
You kids, don't forget
the fighter pilot's code.
And if you do forget,
name him after me.
Good luck.
Oh, I love this.
Oh, this is a beautiful moment.
I can use this.
Thank you both.
-Tom, shut up.
-Tom, shut up.
A bunch of beautiful moments
strung together, isn't it?
What I mean to say is,
it's about intimacy. Love.
Two people who want
to be together and touch.
It's about
pitching a tent and...
Kids?
TOM: Kids?
It's getting hot in here.
Nurse? Cold shower!
Cold shower!
Nurse!