Holidays in the Sun (2014) - full transcript
MLADEN (44) Belgrade born, is a timeshare salesman at Croatian Holiday resort. He is having an affair with his colleague, SONJA (40), who is married to METOD (50) the chief sales manager who learns about his wife's infidelity. He assigns Mladen the toughest client - Omer, a Bosnian war veteran, who doesn't try to hide his aversion to Mladen. Everything becomes hopeless when Omer's three year old son Svendy falls over the edge of the hotel terrace and ends up in a hospital. Grim mood that prevails among the potential buyers is about to ruin the sales. Sonja and Metod blackmail Mladen to continue the sales at the hospital while Omer and his wife are waiting for their son's operation.
In Socialist Yugoslavia,
the law guaranteed to every working
man two weeks of cost-free vacation.
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Careful with that shit,
you'll cut my throat!
Not just yet.
I need you.
I cum faster... than you shave.
Drunk bastard.
Oh, by the way
Metod knows about us.
I don't think he's happy about it.
- Hi, Mom!
- Hi!
You're pale.
Do you eat anything at all?
Sure, Mom.
Almost every day.
- How are you?
- Never felt better. Alive.
Mom, I gotta go to work.
I'll call you.
Wait.
Have you really bought
this flat for me?
Sure. I took a loan.
That's how it's done these days.
This is your flat, Mom.
A nice lady from the bank
called me.
She mentioned some foreclosure.
Don't worry, Mom
I'll call that... nice lady.
Maybe I'm a little late
with my payment.
How's your foot?
- Kiss, I really gotta go now.
- Wait!
I can go to
an old people's home.
Like everybody else.
I'll have company.
If you want information
about client rights,
press the asterisk button,
the pound button,
then type in your PIN.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
You are number
14 in the queue.
Please, call later.
HOLIDAYS IN THE SUN
Do they really think
that I'm such a dork?
To listen to their bullshit
for three hours?!
Go there alone.
We gave our word
and signed the paper...
You signed it, not me!
You and your “free” vacation!
You go to the seaside
only with a loads of money!
What did you put in the form?
Five thousand Marks a month?
Why did you lie?
Why...
Oh my God, Svendy.
Stop that! Fuck, all wet!
I'm swimming
with the Action Man.
What do we have in mind
when we sell timeshare?
That we are not
just salespeople!
We are doctors!
We save lives!
Vacationing is
good for health!
You don't go on a vacation -
you get a heart attack!
It's not only lives
that we're saving.
We save marriages, too.
We save families.
That makes us doctors, firemen.
And lifeguards
on the, shit, beach.
We save, shit, lives!
- Because timeshare...
- What's wrong? Had a rough night?
It is a stronger bond than
the holy sacrament of marriage.
Want some... first aid?
What is marriage
in the modern society?
Marriage lasts
for couple of years.
You don't care about
saving lives?
- But a week in our apartments...
- I've got a killing hangover.
They'll have it until the rest
of the lives of their kids!
Grandchildren!
Great-grandchildren!
I fuck you over.
Batric!
I'll fuck both of you.
...but our clients are ungrateful.
That's why we
call them fly-bys!
They want to use
the free vacation and fly away!
Bur we're here to not let them!
My God, we're late!
Come on!
Another 100 meters,
and I'd get a heart attack.
You paid 800 Euros
for silver fiber pillows.
And 1300 Euros
for a set of fucking pots.
It was 1200,
watch your language.
You went for a free
blood pressure check-up.
They sold you
a massage chair for 2000 Euros.
- I got my eye pressure checked, too.
- On both eyes.
Mother, they rip you off
every time!
All those thing I bought
will someday belong to you...
To your family.
Your children. To enjoy.
My hypothetical wife would have
an abortion in a massage chair,
and I would choke my hypothetical
children with a fiber pillow.
I'll get it!
I'll get it.
To get ownership over
a condo for 99 years.
One week per year.
An excellent investment!
Mother, there are
hidden costs here.
It's almost impossible to resell it
on the real estate market!
What if it's really a bargain?
Fuck this life.
I could've unpacked you first!
Take it easy, Slobo.
I want to use every second
of this vacation.
We can fuck at home anytime.
My God, how nice of them!
It's like in celebrity magazines,
honeymoon report.
- Should I make a photo?
- Not when I'm like this.
My God, my milk is everywhere.
Oh, man... we're busted.
Don't be such a pessimist.
That's why you're still just
an elementary school teacher.
Right...
A hairdresser and a teacher,
celebrity magazine newlyweds.
Like, you're the only one
who misses Sladjana?
Like, only her father is in pain?
We'd never get a free vacation
if we reported the baby,
our income would be too low.
Never!
Saint Petka, please. May this vacation
turn out to be good,
may Sladjana be in good health,
and that we get a bank loan
for the apartment and the car.
Stop it, will you?!
We create a bond!
Today we've got
newlyweds from...
From the charming Serbian
town of... Nis.
- They got special treatment.
- That's right. Olga.
Today, they belong
to God and...
- Me, me!
- And...
To you.
Let's shake these old
Macedonian bones, shall we?
- Thank you, boss.
- Old whore.
But usually guys
get the newlyweds.
The statistics say...
You can do that when you
open your own business!
You should thank Savic for this.
Sex with the bride on her honeymoon
is not our policy.
Anything for the client, boss.
They bought two weeks.
In prime season.
You can be the best and still
follow business ethics, shit!
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The presentation will start now.
- Do we get something to eat?
- It's everything ON-clusive.
Get your hands up!
Come on!
Put them back down.
You're not taking that with you!
You won't embarrass me!
- It's upside down.
- You're upside down.
Okay. I won't
embarrass you... there.
Be nice!
- You're just like your father.
- Let's go.
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I will do the Warming Up today.
My lovely wife
will confirm this.
My foreplay is unbeatable.
Don't let these people
go away from us
to enjoy six days of
free vacation. That's not fair!
In Socialism, every piece of shit
could go to the seaside.
Nothing in this world is free.
- But the cheese in the mousetrap.
- That's right.
Today, we've got
a special guest.
Mister Dietrich Pfizer,
from the head office
honored us with his visit.
Stop it, junkie.
He's got exciting news.
Anyone who makes a sale today
gonna get double commission!
Besides...
Today's margin is not 13000,
but 12000 Euros!
Allowing you
to lower the price!
However...
Old merits do not apply today.
Anyone who doesn't manage
to make a sale today
is free to go.
Without severance pay.
Today, we'll forget about
the past achievements.
We'll forget everything, shit!
We'll forget who was
the salesperson of the year.
How about the salesperson
of the month?
- You're completely safe.
- Really?
This applies even
to my lovely wife.
This applies to me, too.
If you fuck up,
we're all going down!
We feel much better now.
For your information, Savic..
Mr. Pfizer said that
even the Greeks are better than us!
- That's how they see us!
- Danke.
I got a truck driver!
Who let a truck driver
in here, anyway?
A retired truck driver?!
Somebody's fucking
with Batric here!
No fucking around with me!
You got lucky again,
you little cunt? Let me see.
Two hundred Euros to swap.
Anybody? 200 Euros,
to swap. Come on!
You've reached
SOS Rank Call center.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
One, two, is this on, shit?
Good morning everybody.
Welcome to the exclusive
Flamingo Resort,
this pearl of the Adriatic!
- Poor man.
- An invalid, and he has to work.
Tragic life story.
Flamingo used to be
a West Europeans-only resort.
Today, Flamingo is free!
Fuck this.
- After our presentation...
- Like I'm back to school.
Can I get a beer around here?
You will say this is our
pearl of the Adriatic!
In the old times,
everybody went to the seaside.
- No way, today!
- Svendy...
You want a beer? A small one?
Want it? Here's what you get!
You had a bunch of worker's
holiday camps all over the coast!
Where are these holiday
camps now, if I may ask?
Follow me, please.
Sorry, catch you later.
In free Croatia only. Even an
invalid can earn his daily bread.
Let's go. Get up.
Go ahead.
I want a waiter.
Everybody's gone!
You've reached
SOS Bank Call center.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
You are currently no. 14
in the queue.
That is why those
“holiday camps”
today look... like this!
Vacation is not, shit,
just for everyone!
One has to earn it!
Vacation is
for people like you!
You broke free from Communism!
You took control
of your destiny!
You are the true winners!
Congratulations! Follow me!
This guy's full of bullshit.
- He's full of bullshit.
- Shut up, both of you.
Before you make this
major step in your life,
let's make a toast
to our newlyweds,
a couple from
the friendly city of Nis!
- We're busted.
- Lovely Dragana and hefty Slobodan.
Flammy... one big hug
for our dear guests!
That's a good one!
- You really shouldn't have...
- Look at him!
It's a stark.
Waiter!
You are currently no. 9
in the queue.
Good morning.
My name is Mladen,
I will be your host today.
- If you have any question at all...
- I've got one.
- Who said you can sit here?
- Come on!
Guy over there.
The Slovenian, my boss.
- The invalid?
- Seriously disabled.
- From the war?
- You hear the man. Slovenian.
Nobody can understand them,
why would anybody fight
against them?
Although... they fuck
you Serbs over.
You speak our language?
Bosnian?
A little...
But I understand everything.
- The pushy guy, huh?!
- Go ahead, draw.
I go for a beer,
you're here for my kidney.
You want my kidney?
Where do I sign?
- He's joking.
- I know.
Joking, my ass.
- Where are you from, buddy?
- Belgrade.
- Where are you going?
- To fetch the waiter.
Or to get these papers
for the kidney.
Do your stuff.
I'll manage alone.
Your fucking free vacation.
Domestic or German beer?
German.
They've got German.
Easy to please...
Bosnian prick.
We get only scumbags from there.
That's what you get
when you fuck the boss's wife.
Maybe he thinks that
I've fallen in love with you.
A man who sold a 99 years deal
to a person dying of cancer?
He an fall in love?
I was coked-up. I thought
we are all immortal.
I gave him comfort.
At least half of these poor fuckers
are dead meat.
Too bad I didn't get
the Croatian war veteran.
I would've wrapped him up
in half an hour.
The Macedonian hag is dead,
only she doesn't know it yet.
Check out fatso's tits.
She left a suckling baby at home.
Typical fly-by.
You're not a buyer if you're
wasting money on baby shit.
Tuzla. Video rental
store owner. Proletarian.
Look here!
Bosnian war veteran.
The hillbilly carries
some serious cash though.
Last ice cream, kid.
The rest of the money goes to
uncle Mladen, for the deposit.
I don't want the kid
to catch cold.
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How many of you have already
been on a vacation?
Don't lie, we've never been
on a vacation.
We are now.
You, you, you..
Almost everyone!
Does a field trip count?
Vacationing is important!
But, once you go back home,
what do you have from it?
A couple of color photos
that end up in a drawer.
Some won't have even that.
So I forgot the fucking
camera. Kill me now!
Don't worry, Dad,
I'll draw you.
Where is all the money
spent for vacation?
Gone! Vanished!
Lost forever!
That's not real money, right?
That's all false values,
my Svendy.
Who cares?
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Salesman of the month
is on his knees!
- Oh my God!
- Hey, Serb...
Repent with me,
Pedro, a servant of God.
- No, thanks.
- Great. I mean...
I'd feel great if Metod
gave me Southern hillbillies.
The old hag got the newlyweds?
He's fucking over his best salesman,
torturing him
like they tortured Jesus.
What about your clients?
Nice people. Father
and daughter. Intellectuals.
Now, just a line of good old...
H, to relax.
And that's it.
The best Flamingo salesman
having troubles with his prostate?
Shaking off is a problem, too.
Wanna help?
Of course!
Out of respect!
Get away from me,
you crazy bitch!
Just go ahead and shag, shag.
Batric loves faggots.
More faggots,
more pussy for Batric.
Batric likes to bang women.
Because women
make shopping decisions.
That's why I'd fuck the fat lady.
I'd fuck her husband, too,
if they sign.
Homey Pedro... homo Pedro,
you look pale.
Hundred Euro says,
that this little prick
is packing his bags tomorrow.
I'm in.
You little cunt.
You take care of it.
Thanks, man.
How come you're so cool?
I got my lucky pen.
Check this out.
Montblanc, 5000 Kunas.
For your lucky pen.
You'll be okay.
Come here.
Can I just touch it?
Can I kiss it?
I'm good now.
Our mascot and our agents
will take you inside
to continue with
individual presentations.
These who do not attend
lose the right to a free vacation!
My dear agents, please show
our dear guests inside!
Let's go. Come on.
- Paying in installments is an option?
- Let's go.
- Some real food inside?
- Of course, anything you want!
- This is regular procedure.
- Sit!
You're from Vienna,
you obey the rules.
Go.
Marital status?
Active.
Years of marriage?
Six, or seven?
Let's say, seven.
Education qualifications?
Annual income?
Rascals...
Look at this... real bliss.
- Are we going to swim?
- When we pluck up courage.
- I already plucked it.
- Really? Give me five.
Annual income?
Do I lie again?
Lie if you
plucked up your courage.
Have you?
- Let's see if Mom has the courage.
- Omer! Don't!
Let's see it!
You two!
This is exactly the same form
we already filled in Nis,
when we got the... voucher.
Why do I have to do it
all over again?
It seems that your husband
doesn't mind. Right. Slobodan?
Teachers are used to
filling up things.
- They're really good at filling up.
- Come on...
Lady...
we are on our honeymoon.
Forms and romance don't match.
Wipe your tears, my dear
Wipe your tears,
Your whole life lies ahead of you
Don't let the...
This one's even crazier
than our guy.
My husband sang this to me
on our honeymoon.
We were young,
just like you are now.
A week in Dubrovnik.
A dream come true... romance!
I'm so happy for you.
Six months later, he was dead.
Pancreas cancer.
We're sorry, truly.
Extremely.
No smoking here.
We care about your health.
We hoped I'd get pregnant
in Opatija.
It wasn't meant to be.
And you?
Do you plan any children?
I have to go to the toilet.
He'll finish this.
She's sick?
Bitch lies like a dog.
She keeps telling the same story.
She never had a husband.
- You should know that.
- Really?
She's a lesbian.
You better watch yourself.
Sugar, you can ask
for another agent.
I'd be really good to you. I'll be
good to your man, if I need to.
I can see that I turn you on.
It's only natural.
Type in your PIN.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
Estimated hold time
is... 14 minutes.
- Maybe she's pregnant?
- No way!
- Too much in the sun, maybe.
- Maybe.
And maybe
an ownership over a condo
is the right thing
for newlyweds.
Let me finish this first.
What about this?
Education qualifications?
Airport tower?
Put down, "Croat war veteran”.
Got anything
against this college?
No! I say it's worth
more than a PhD.
Why do I get the feeling
that you're fucking with me?
Who, me?
You've got my deepest respect.
I got you by the balls now.
Do I put income
in Kunas or Euros?
Even if I thought of buying
something from you, now I won't.
Call the manager. Now!
What's up, boys?
Can't wait to hear our
special VIP offer?
This sissy here
never said a thing about it.
You don't like me?
I like you so much...
I've got the brains,
he's got the legs.
We, defenders...
We can easily
work something out.
- Where did you fight?
- You name it.
That's a real man,
you sleazebag.
I couldn't agree with you more.
- Where is your agent?
- I sent him to get a beer.
German beer!
No alcohol in this stage
of presentation!
Only a sober man
can change his life!
Maybe in your fucking Europe,
you sober cunt!
You can leave this
to your children.
We've got no children.
Don't fuck with me,
it says here "one son”.
Milena!
You put Bora in these.
How could I not put him in?
He is dead, you stupid woman.
14 years now.
Dead!
Love is the most beautiful
thing in life.
When you've got a summer house
you can use it for 52 weeks per year.
52 weeks to use it...
you've got 52 weeks
available to use it...
- to use it...
- But how much do you really use it?
You spend there
a week or two in the summer.
A week or two,
in the summer...
- A week or...
- You just keep on with your bullshit.
- For the summer...
- a week or two.
- And the maintenance, you pay...
- ..for all 52 weeks.
For the maintenance,
you pay all 52 weeks.
You can't use my account!
I'll lose my veteran pension!
How can that be profitable?
- How can that be profitable?
- No way.
How can that be profitable?
- Suck my dick!
- No way.
Fifty two weeks!
How can that be profitable?
I maintain the grave
of my Bora.
Fifty two weeks... every day.
In the summer, you use one
or two weeks out of fifty two...
Don't move.
I'll just go to...
Can you repeat that?
When you use..
From zero to hero,
from zero to hero...
- What's this? A cult?
- Like you would know.
You threaten an 80-year-old woman
with eviction? A shot of rakia.
- What?
- Rakia.
Contract? Do you really think that
I carry the contract with me?
Another shot.
It says that the place goes to auction
if you are three months overdue?
I don't care if it's fucking four,
I've been paying regularly
for five years now!
You'll get your money
by the end of the week!
I saw what you got
from that asshole.
If you were screwing my wife,
I'd simply kill you.
Without such a nasty revenge!
But I'm a man. I'll help you.
I got a great deal for you.
Come here.
You give me that Bosnian guy,
and I give you
the Viennese couple.
Viennese?
Sanitation manager?
Public toilet cleaner?
Try to fool one of the new guys.
- The dwarf, maybe.
- I'm begging you.
Half of your commission.
- You've got no heart, Savic.
- Thanks.
You can kiss
self-management goodbye!
Back to work, shit, now!
Good luck, Savic.
- Thank you.
- Coffee...
You shouldn't have...
We filled everything in.
- Bravo.
- Wait!
Where's my beer?
The Slovenian guy is strict
about it. Real asshole.
But...
I've got these.
- Anything for the client.
- This is good.
- Dad, you're boozing again?
- Omer, don't.
Leave me alone.
Shame on you.
Spilling the booze, while
children in Africa stay sober.
Omer...
Take mine. I'll lose my job.
Look, now...
We answered all your questions.
I've got a question for you now.
- Okay?
- Okay.
May 25th, 1995.
Does this date tell you anything?
- Omer, please, we're on a holiday...
- Zip it.
The Youth Day?
Fifteen years since
the death of Comrade Tito.
- Bravo. That's right...
- Mladen.
- You did military service?
- Back in 1988.
Bravo. I served in 1980.
The very year Comrade Tito died.
- You watched the funeral?
- Yes.
During the funeral, we stood
six hours in front of the TV.
The whole company.
Six hours.
- Like this!
- Take it easy.
Like this... 'Ten-hut!
The captain shouts:
"Salute to the TV!"
And for six hours,
we salute the TV.
Six hours,
during the whole funeral.
The whole company!
But the soldiers
start to fall.
They pass out and fall.
Belgrade boys, like you.
You don't give a fuck
the whole world came to pay
respects to our Marshall!
They went down already
when Brezhnev was there.
Before Todor Zhivkov.
Nicolae Ceausescu.
Erich Honecker, Sekou Toure,
Hua Guofeng.
Margaret Thatcher,
Anwar El Sadat
Saddam Hussein,
God rest his soul,
Indira Gandhi,
and that Kraut...
The German guy, Genscher,
Helmut Schmidt.
- Kenneth Kaundal.
- Sit down, people stare.
Great army story!
I had a guy from Bosnia
in my company, he was just like you.
He could say "Long live the Communist
party" while burping!
At Kim Il-Sung,
half of the company was down.
The captain is almost gone..
But he is still on his feet.
While I stand there...
like a rock.
Like a rock!
Vacationing is not
for such fools.
Like a rock!
Only a couple of us made it
to the end of broadcast.
Congratulations.
The captain says it too,
after the broadcast.
He, himself soaked in sweat.
But he says,
- Baslagic... congratulations.
- Are you done with this?
- And I sit down.
- Thank God.
- He'll fuck up our business.
- Wait!
A fool like him
is a real buyer.
How about you, kid?
Where did you serve?
I skipped the Yugoslav Army
because of the Croatian war.
It's like you haven't lived at all.
- I agree.
- I sit down.
But then... A rerun!
I stand in attention,
right away.
I salute. The captain
has no other option, he shouts,
- Salute to...
- To the TV!
Bravo.
You really fucked them up.
Fucked them up?
I fucked them up?
That's how you see it?
I was the last man standing
at the end of the rerun.
That's a joke for you?
Belgrade boy... everything
in life is just a joke for you.
Everything.
That is why you don't know
what happened on May 25th, 1995.
Be still!
Be nice, hear me?
I don't know.
A shell, 130...
a 130 mm shell.
Straight at the town square.
Full of young people.
Your people fired it
from the hills.
My people?
Seventy one killed,
150 wounded.
Between 18 to 23 old.
Don't be a mood killer.
This one here, nagging
about me killing the mood,
on a fucking free holiday.
She lost two of her cousins
that day.
Almost kids.
Kids.
Unlike you and me,
they didn't know the drill command.
“Atomic from the right”, means you
have to jump for cover ta your left,
and there was
no one there to shout!
Who would shout, anyway?
Who would shout at
the town square, like a fool?
“Atomic from the right!”
At the town square.
You can't shout like that.
Makes no sense.
Scram, boy, go play.
Stay in my sight, hear me?
Makes no sense.
Omer, please, we're on a holiday.
Nothing will bring back
my Saliha and Selima.
- That's all Muslim propaganda...
- Quiet down. Mother.
Grown men always end up
with army stories.
How pathetic.
But we, women, like to live
in the real world. Right?
There's something odd here.
What's odd?
Income.
It doesn't match the number
you gave at home.
Come on, Sonja.
Let me do my job.
Sometimes,
when people are on holiday,
they get more relaxed,
more... honest.
Have some water.
It will do you good.
Lying about income could
result in holiday cancellation.
Our local field agents
were clear about that.
And you signed.
I signed it.
Take me, father.
I want to draw some more.
Fuck the vacation and everything.
A perfect place
for children, isn't it?
Does it really have
to be that way?
It has to be!
But then again, not.
For some reason,
this Serbian loser likes you.
No one has to see this.
Is this okay, Baslagic?
Draw something.
You want me to draw you?
When you grow up.
That's for big boys, only.
Now sit here
and think about it.
I need your salesman
for consultation.
I'm sorry, urgent business.
The bad cop role
turns you on?
No.
I owed you this.
Can we talk?
This part really suits you.
Well done!
You've got a flat tire!
Fucking whore!
What does the lady boss say?
Is she canceling us?
No, she won't.
I managed to reason with her.
That's good.
You've got two options, Omer.
You can listen carefully
to what I have to say
about this special offer
for a week in the VIP condo.
- We will...
- Or...
I can tell you now
what happened or.
October 8th, 1991.
What happened to me.
I don't give a fuck about
what happened to you.
- Omer, please!
- No F words, Daddy.
I swear on my mother's grave.
Scram now,
bother someone else.
Who can afford a house
on the coast these days?
- Only the crooks.
- Only the crooks.
Stupid stork.
What are you drawing?
Look at him... and that
stupid haircut! Scram!
Someday, my son will
e grateful for this.
I'm already grateful.
You should be.
Mothers are sacred.
Skip the kiss.
Die, you little brat!
This is a full discount
for two weeks.
An honest, hard working man
deserves even better than
a house at the seaside.
Thanks to... this,
It's got air conditioning!
Vacation in a resort
that used to be reserved for
foreign guests only.
Do the nudist still come here?
- Milena!
- They used to come before the war.
No, madam.
We killed them all!
I killed at least three of them!
Just kidding.
Maybe the monthly payment
seems too large for you, but...
You won't have to pay
a single cent for a whole year.
- Isn't that really...
- We get what you're saying.
Bur every couple has some
priorities at the beginning.
Maybe in a couple of years...
A couple of years?!
I'm sorry.
I'm awfully sorry.
Here... you have an option...
To take a week
every other year.
That's not too much, is it?
Do it for me.
Please, take it.
You'll save my life.
Please... I'm begging you!
On your fuckin' knees,
crazy bitch.
Losing a job at my age is...
Aunt Olga, please don't.
Still a lot of cash.
How much is your commission?
Ten percent?
I can pay this, no problem.
But to fuck you up
a little is fun.
Now you're going to
suck my dick.
He can't get it up, anyway.
Is 2% enough for you?
Shut up.
I'm talking business!
We're having a chat.
- Sweets for them, too?
- No, they're bad boys.
So, how much does
this week of yours cost?
Your week. Maja. Ownership
As long as you are alive.
As long as your children are alive.
Grandchildren
and great-grandchildren.
For the next 99 years.
Man... if anyone in this country
thought 99 years ahead,
we'd never fought
against each other.
- Is this in Marks?
- No, in peanuts.
This kind of money you make
only during the war.
If you are a scumbag.
Okay.
But, if another war
breaks out between us
and this time you get rich,
you'll look for me first
about this deal, okay?
I'll look for you anyway,
Belgrade boy.
Omer, stop it, will you?
Can't you see we're kidding?
Toasting with fucking water.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
In Bosnia, you'd call it
a price for suckers.
That's the right word.
Would you be more interested
if the price suits you?
Well, it always
comes down to money.
- It's nice here. Right, Maja?
- Yes, it is.
Have you seen Svendy?
He's here somewhere.
Do you hear him?
I do, but I have
to find Svendy.
Go, it's a man's job anyway.
Have you seen my
title boy? Small, chubby.
Now, the best offer
for a poor guy like me?
- Free.
- Free?
That's a good one.
Svendy, when I get hold of you...
These Bosnians
are fucking up our deal.
I can't find him.
I'll go look outside.
Let me see it. Come on.
Negotiations between Serbia
and Bosnia are going well.
Brotherhood and unity
in business.
That's what I call democracy.
Bravo, Savic.
Bravo!
Twelve thousand?
That's our secret.
Savic is giving up
the lion's share of his commission.
A generous, good man.
I know, but this is not
a trifle, either.
Not for a used car.
But for a luxurious VIP condo?
In Bosnia, you have
a word for a respectable man?
- The Chief.
- Right. VIP, Chief.
- Just like our Mladen, here.
- Svendy!
Who else in Tuzla owns
a condo at an Adriatic resort?
Not the one you stayed in.
A much better condo!
Do you know what VIP means?
Fuck you and fuck VIP!
He threw up!
- I'll give my life for his!
- Let them do their job!
My son, my son.
Our dear guests...
Your attention, please!
Everything will be just fine
with the little boy
and the Baslagic family
will join us in no-time.
What are you talking about?!
The child just tumbled down
four meters!
To fall and bleed
is nothing to a child!
We've got important business to do!
Business? The ambulance just took
a child, you heartless prick!
The kid was a real
pain in the ass, still...
Assholes make children,
but they can't take care of them.
Why haven't you
taken security measures...
To express our care
for your well-being,
we're serving right now a buffet
with Adriatic cuisine.
Just keep it coming. Come on.
Barbarians!
They will never learn manners.
Uncivilized pricks!
You simply have to try this.
Get away from me!
All of you, get away from me!
I'm sorry!
I'm so sorry, please...
Jesus Christ...
Of all the fly-bys,
getting screwed by a fly-boy.
Has anyone made a deal yet?
A week, with a discount.
- Beginner's luck.
- I'll drink to that.
Two weeks. VIP.
No discount.
How about our salesman
of the year?
Two things set so far.
You... and him.
Fuck these long faces!
We still got a job.
Today!
Back to work!
Move!
Olga...
From zero to hero, don't forget that.
Look... he drew us all.
How much do you owe the bank?
Three grand,
for the past three months.
You bought your mother
a place in Beverly Hills?
A small flat.
In downtown Belgrade.
The Communists threw
her family out of the building.
I knew she'd like to die
in the place where she was born.
Four grand per square meter.
You can't expect an ex-junkie
to act rationally.
I'll go check on the kid.
This is yours.
You're the best salesman
I've ever met.
On your feet.
May I have
your attention, please?
Our friend
is going to the hospital,
from there, he will inform us
about little Svendy
and about his dear parents.
Way to go, young man!
He will have
some great news for us very soon!
From those 100 Euros
buy some fruit for the kid.
Dude, I have to work.
- Hey, say hello from me.
- Good luck, Savic.
If I said something wrong..
It's for your own good!
I am a mother!
I had to lie because of you!
- I have a baby!
- I have a discount.
Discount!
I'm a lousy mother,
wasting my time here!
Walking down the beach,
gathering shells!
Rubbing myself with oil!
I should rub shit on me!
Go ahead, throw me out of here!
I want to go home.
Right.
Okay...
Fuck, dude, the old hag
totally lost it!
We're totally fucked up!
Just give me that stuff
you've got.
Dude, I can't
Can't you see I'm fucked up?
I gotta pull myself together!
Dude, you fucking got me now!
Here, a bonus...
Montblanc.
We're going home.
- They gave him a CAT scan.
- Yes, scan.
He didn't even get
to swim in the sea.
All the time he drew the sea.
And these bloody birds.
What do the doctors say?
Badly bruised, but thank God,
nothing broken.
Good.
I mean... that's good.
That's good.
Thanks for coming.
Excuse me.
What the fuck...
Hi, Mom.
I'm not working, go ahead.
Let them call. Don't talk to them.
Tell them to call me.
Yes... and, Mom...
If those people come there,
don't let them in.
Even if they look
like nice people.
There are no nice people
in the bank.
I gotta go now.
Bye.
Problems?
Yes... sort of.
I hope you don't mind.
I'm just...
Trying to take
my mind off this...
What was the story you wanted to tell
me? When I bored you to death?
You bored him, alright,
That thing, in 1991.
What was that? Where?
Vukovar, Croatian war.
When I look at you,
I'd say that
all your life
you just chase pussy.
Well, that was
the original plan, but...
It seems the Army
had other plans for me.
The military police picked us up
in the middle of the night.
Me and my brother.
You don't look like
a volunteer, anyway.
Fuck man, I don't.
Half of Belgrade boys slept
every night at a different place.
Hiding from the mobilization.
When they finally caught us and put us
on a truck for the war zone,
he told me that he actually knew
they were coming for us,
Moron.
He didn't want to tell me.
He knew I'd run.
What can I tell you?
He wasn't the only one
who acted like that.
It was like... we lost it.
So? How long did you fight?
Eleven days.
- Wow, a true warrior.
- We got information...
that they were forming
a firing squad out of recruits.
To shoot the prisoners...
and civilians.
I didn't plan it to be
this way, but
I got drunk as a skunk.
My hand shook a little
when I fired.
I aimed at the pinky toe.
Fuck...
I almost lost my foot.
A real, fine wound.
But the pinky toe
made it through the war.
That's not funny.
- Well, it is.
- Here it is... like new.
How about your brother?
Let's forget these
silly army stories.
Baslagic.
It's still critical.
Critical? You said
nothing's broken.
The CT showed something
we call cerebral edema.
You said bruises and...
The fall caused a blood vessel rupture
and swelling of the tissue.
Blood vessel... in his head?
He'll get corticosteroids
for the swelling,
but we have to open the skull
to give the tissue some space.
Please, don't open my child's brain.
I don't want that...
You have to sign
this consent form.
- Do you understand me?
- Wait a minute.
You said nothing's broken,
just bruises.
Fuck this!
I'll go get him!
Mr. Baslagic!
If we don't do this,
you'll lose your child.
Omer...
Sign it. Trust him.
I'll sign it.
Let it be.
Just save him, please.
We are wired to the PA,
our thoughts are with you
and the Baslagic family.
How is our little Svendy?
Sonja, the kid is...
He'll be alright... we hope.
Little Svendy is alright!
That's not what I said,
that's not... Sonja!
There's more!
Our lovely Baslagic couple
have decided to buy
a week right here, in Flamingo,
because little Svendy
deserves this.
Little Svendy...
will have here
a safe place to stay!
I hope that all of you
will join this brave family.
From zero to hero... discount.
From zero to hero... discount.
From zero to hero...
I have to go now.
See you at the hotel.
Mladen?
Sit with us.
Please.
Come here.
You heard what the doctor said.
If everything turns out fine,
Svendy would like to come here
for the summer, wouldn't he?
You said it yourself.
It's perfect for kids.
We'd like to have
another look at the contract.
To think about it.
It must be in your briefcase.
Why would you think
I'd have the contract?
Because you have
the briefcase.
- Sonja, the kid is not alright!
- Is he alive?
- Yes, but they will open his...
- Great!
People just sign,
no questions asked.
This is the best
presentation ever!
You've done a miracle.
For you, for me.
For all of us.
And we've made it through this
fucking day just because of you.
For how much did you
rip off those Bosnians?
You can tell me.
Two weeks, at least?
Why do you go on vacation?
Because...
Because you want to relax.
Right?
- Right.
- Yes.
Bravo!
After ten years of vacationing,
what can you show? What?
A bunch of old photos
in a shoe box.
And memories...
ever fading memories.
There's nothing
you can do about it.
What about the money
you've spent in those places?
What about the money?
Where is the money?
It's gone.
You left it at all those
fucking places that you've been in.
- Right?
- Right.
So, it's gone.
It's spent. Gone.
This... you've got this at home.
Condos for ordinary people.
But this!
You've seen something like this
only on TV and
celebrity magazines. Right?
But why Omer and Maja wouldn't
go on the same vacation as...
Bono Vox, or...
- Angelina Jolie.
- Right!
And a couple of others, too.
Are Omer and Maja any worse than
those people in the magazines?
Are they?
The answer is... no!
They're not.
You can take
your friends with you.
You can have a good time with them,
have a barbecue.
You can even charge them!
- To charge our friends?!
- Of course!
It looks exciting...
it looks appealing.
But... "it's too expensive”,
you say to yourself.
"Can I afford this?”
Probably not.
Forget it
This is not just for anyone.
- But we didn't say anything.
- Yes, you did. I heard you. Here,
But 'can I afford this'
is not the real question here.
Because money's got
nothing to do with this!
This is the real question.
"Will I settle for petty things
for the rest of my life?"
"Will I pick leftovers
for the rest of my life?”
"Do these leftovers
define my whole life?"
And the mother
of all questions.
"Do I have the guts to take the
responsibility for my own life?"
That is the real question here.
Today, you have the chance to step
into a new period of your lives.
Recognize that chance.
Grab it.
Give me the pen.
I gave away my lucky pen.
Omer, wait.
Before you sign...
Take a look at this.
It says that you have to pay
the annual maintenance fee.
It's 350 Euros.
Do I have to pay now, in cash?
Wait. Take a look at this.
You can lose the right of ownership
if one year you miss to pay
the annual maintenance fee.
- Do you have 350 Euros on you?
- Here.
Here it is.
But you tell them
to paint the walls right now.
I want my Svendy
to stay in a neat room.
Painted in yellow! He loves
yellow, draws it everywhere.
The Sun should shine on everything,
he says. My clever boy.
Here.
Omer, don't buy this.
This is not for you, man.
We're not
good enough for this?!
For my Svendy, anything!
My Svendy is not
good enough for this?!
Do you hear me?!
You said, what can you show after
all those years of vacations?
Just a bunch of family photos!
I don't want to show just
a bunch of photos! I don't!
- Give me that pen!
- Give it.
Look at this, a fountain pen.
You managers are well off.
I haven't seen this
since the elementary school.
I learned to write
with a fountain pen.
With a ballpoint pen
you just spoil the handwriting.
- Where do I sign?
- Here.
Come here.
Here we are
In the jaws of changing times
You are turning into "You"
While we are turning
into a bunch of old jerks
Etiquette, conscience and solidarity
Stilt turn us on
Better a natural balcony
Than plastic popularity
The comic books generation
Drinking cold beer
Happy for no reason
We are still alive
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
We used to be the New Wave
Furious friends making music
Dancing the last ball
Playing the sharp guitar
We wanted a better world
Then the money ran out
And the good bunny
Turned into a fierce hunter
The comic books generation
Drinking cold beer
Happy for no reason
We are still alive
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
Hardsub extraction, correction, resyncing: bruno321
Additional translation: Rambo1983
the law guaranteed to every working
man two weeks of cost-free vacation.
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Careful with that shit,
you'll cut my throat!
Not just yet.
I need you.
I cum faster... than you shave.
Drunk bastard.
Oh, by the way
Metod knows about us.
I don't think he's happy about it.
- Hi, Mom!
- Hi!
You're pale.
Do you eat anything at all?
Sure, Mom.
Almost every day.
- How are you?
- Never felt better. Alive.
Mom, I gotta go to work.
I'll call you.
Wait.
Have you really bought
this flat for me?
Sure. I took a loan.
That's how it's done these days.
This is your flat, Mom.
A nice lady from the bank
called me.
She mentioned some foreclosure.
Don't worry, Mom
I'll call that... nice lady.
Maybe I'm a little late
with my payment.
How's your foot?
- Kiss, I really gotta go now.
- Wait!
I can go to
an old people's home.
Like everybody else.
I'll have company.
If you want information
about client rights,
press the asterisk button,
the pound button,
then type in your PIN.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
You are number
14 in the queue.
Please, call later.
HOLIDAYS IN THE SUN
Do they really think
that I'm such a dork?
To listen to their bullshit
for three hours?!
Go there alone.
We gave our word
and signed the paper...
You signed it, not me!
You and your “free” vacation!
You go to the seaside
only with a loads of money!
What did you put in the form?
Five thousand Marks a month?
Why did you lie?
Why...
Oh my God, Svendy.
Stop that! Fuck, all wet!
I'm swimming
with the Action Man.
What do we have in mind
when we sell timeshare?
That we are not
just salespeople!
We are doctors!
We save lives!
Vacationing is
good for health!
You don't go on a vacation -
you get a heart attack!
It's not only lives
that we're saving.
We save marriages, too.
We save families.
That makes us doctors, firemen.
And lifeguards
on the, shit, beach.
We save, shit, lives!
- Because timeshare...
- What's wrong? Had a rough night?
It is a stronger bond than
the holy sacrament of marriage.
Want some... first aid?
What is marriage
in the modern society?
Marriage lasts
for couple of years.
You don't care about
saving lives?
- But a week in our apartments...
- I've got a killing hangover.
They'll have it until the rest
of the lives of their kids!
Grandchildren!
Great-grandchildren!
I fuck you over.
Batric!
I'll fuck both of you.
...but our clients are ungrateful.
That's why we
call them fly-bys!
They want to use
the free vacation and fly away!
Bur we're here to not let them!
My God, we're late!
Come on!
Another 100 meters,
and I'd get a heart attack.
You paid 800 Euros
for silver fiber pillows.
And 1300 Euros
for a set of fucking pots.
It was 1200,
watch your language.
You went for a free
blood pressure check-up.
They sold you
a massage chair for 2000 Euros.
- I got my eye pressure checked, too.
- On both eyes.
Mother, they rip you off
every time!
All those thing I bought
will someday belong to you...
To your family.
Your children. To enjoy.
My hypothetical wife would have
an abortion in a massage chair,
and I would choke my hypothetical
children with a fiber pillow.
I'll get it!
I'll get it.
To get ownership over
a condo for 99 years.
One week per year.
An excellent investment!
Mother, there are
hidden costs here.
It's almost impossible to resell it
on the real estate market!
What if it's really a bargain?
Fuck this life.
I could've unpacked you first!
Take it easy, Slobo.
I want to use every second
of this vacation.
We can fuck at home anytime.
My God, how nice of them!
It's like in celebrity magazines,
honeymoon report.
- Should I make a photo?
- Not when I'm like this.
My God, my milk is everywhere.
Oh, man... we're busted.
Don't be such a pessimist.
That's why you're still just
an elementary school teacher.
Right...
A hairdresser and a teacher,
celebrity magazine newlyweds.
Like, you're the only one
who misses Sladjana?
Like, only her father is in pain?
We'd never get a free vacation
if we reported the baby,
our income would be too low.
Never!
Saint Petka, please. May this vacation
turn out to be good,
may Sladjana be in good health,
and that we get a bank loan
for the apartment and the car.
Stop it, will you?!
We create a bond!
Today we've got
newlyweds from...
From the charming Serbian
town of... Nis.
- They got special treatment.
- That's right. Olga.
Today, they belong
to God and...
- Me, me!
- And...
To you.
Let's shake these old
Macedonian bones, shall we?
- Thank you, boss.
- Old whore.
But usually guys
get the newlyweds.
The statistics say...
You can do that when you
open your own business!
You should thank Savic for this.
Sex with the bride on her honeymoon
is not our policy.
Anything for the client, boss.
They bought two weeks.
In prime season.
You can be the best and still
follow business ethics, shit!
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The presentation will start now.
- Do we get something to eat?
- It's everything ON-clusive.
Get your hands up!
Come on!
Put them back down.
You're not taking that with you!
You won't embarrass me!
- It's upside down.
- You're upside down.
Okay. I won't
embarrass you... there.
Be nice!
- You're just like your father.
- Let's go.
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I will do the Warming Up today.
My lovely wife
will confirm this.
My foreplay is unbeatable.
Don't let these people
go away from us
to enjoy six days of
free vacation. That's not fair!
In Socialism, every piece of shit
could go to the seaside.
Nothing in this world is free.
- But the cheese in the mousetrap.
- That's right.
Today, we've got
a special guest.
Mister Dietrich Pfizer,
from the head office
honored us with his visit.
Stop it, junkie.
He's got exciting news.
Anyone who makes a sale today
gonna get double commission!
Besides...
Today's margin is not 13000,
but 12000 Euros!
Allowing you
to lower the price!
However...
Old merits do not apply today.
Anyone who doesn't manage
to make a sale today
is free to go.
Without severance pay.
Today, we'll forget about
the past achievements.
We'll forget everything, shit!
We'll forget who was
the salesperson of the year.
How about the salesperson
of the month?
- You're completely safe.
- Really?
This applies even
to my lovely wife.
This applies to me, too.
If you fuck up,
we're all going down!
We feel much better now.
For your information, Savic..
Mr. Pfizer said that
even the Greeks are better than us!
- That's how they see us!
- Danke.
I got a truck driver!
Who let a truck driver
in here, anyway?
A retired truck driver?!
Somebody's fucking
with Batric here!
No fucking around with me!
You got lucky again,
you little cunt? Let me see.
Two hundred Euros to swap.
Anybody? 200 Euros,
to swap. Come on!
You've reached
SOS Rank Call center.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
One, two, is this on, shit?
Good morning everybody.
Welcome to the exclusive
Flamingo Resort,
this pearl of the Adriatic!
- Poor man.
- An invalid, and he has to work.
Tragic life story.
Flamingo used to be
a West Europeans-only resort.
Today, Flamingo is free!
Fuck this.
- After our presentation...
- Like I'm back to school.
Can I get a beer around here?
You will say this is our
pearl of the Adriatic!
In the old times,
everybody went to the seaside.
- No way, today!
- Svendy...
You want a beer? A small one?
Want it? Here's what you get!
You had a bunch of worker's
holiday camps all over the coast!
Where are these holiday
camps now, if I may ask?
Follow me, please.
Sorry, catch you later.
In free Croatia only. Even an
invalid can earn his daily bread.
Let's go. Get up.
Go ahead.
I want a waiter.
Everybody's gone!
You've reached
SOS Bank Call center.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
You are currently no. 14
in the queue.
That is why those
“holiday camps”
today look... like this!
Vacation is not, shit,
just for everyone!
One has to earn it!
Vacation is
for people like you!
You broke free from Communism!
You took control
of your destiny!
You are the true winners!
Congratulations! Follow me!
This guy's full of bullshit.
- He's full of bullshit.
- Shut up, both of you.
Before you make this
major step in your life,
let's make a toast
to our newlyweds,
a couple from
the friendly city of Nis!
- We're busted.
- Lovely Dragana and hefty Slobodan.
Flammy... one big hug
for our dear guests!
That's a good one!
- You really shouldn't have...
- Look at him!
It's a stark.
Waiter!
You are currently no. 9
in the queue.
Good morning.
My name is Mladen,
I will be your host today.
- If you have any question at all...
- I've got one.
- Who said you can sit here?
- Come on!
Guy over there.
The Slovenian, my boss.
- The invalid?
- Seriously disabled.
- From the war?
- You hear the man. Slovenian.
Nobody can understand them,
why would anybody fight
against them?
Although... they fuck
you Serbs over.
You speak our language?
Bosnian?
A little...
But I understand everything.
- The pushy guy, huh?!
- Go ahead, draw.
I go for a beer,
you're here for my kidney.
You want my kidney?
Where do I sign?
- He's joking.
- I know.
Joking, my ass.
- Where are you from, buddy?
- Belgrade.
- Where are you going?
- To fetch the waiter.
Or to get these papers
for the kidney.
Do your stuff.
I'll manage alone.
Your fucking free vacation.
Domestic or German beer?
German.
They've got German.
Easy to please...
Bosnian prick.
We get only scumbags from there.
That's what you get
when you fuck the boss's wife.
Maybe he thinks that
I've fallen in love with you.
A man who sold a 99 years deal
to a person dying of cancer?
He an fall in love?
I was coked-up. I thought
we are all immortal.
I gave him comfort.
At least half of these poor fuckers
are dead meat.
Too bad I didn't get
the Croatian war veteran.
I would've wrapped him up
in half an hour.
The Macedonian hag is dead,
only she doesn't know it yet.
Check out fatso's tits.
She left a suckling baby at home.
Typical fly-by.
You're not a buyer if you're
wasting money on baby shit.
Tuzla. Video rental
store owner. Proletarian.
Look here!
Bosnian war veteran.
The hillbilly carries
some serious cash though.
Last ice cream, kid.
The rest of the money goes to
uncle Mladen, for the deposit.
I don't want the kid
to catch cold.
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How many of you have already
been on a vacation?
Don't lie, we've never been
on a vacation.
We are now.
You, you, you..
Almost everyone!
Does a field trip count?
Vacationing is important!
But, once you go back home,
what do you have from it?
A couple of color photos
that end up in a drawer.
Some won't have even that.
So I forgot the fucking
camera. Kill me now!
Don't worry, Dad,
I'll draw you.
Where is all the money
spent for vacation?
Gone! Vanished!
Lost forever!
That's not real money, right?
That's all false values,
my Svendy.
Who cares?
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Salesman of the month
is on his knees!
- Oh my God!
- Hey, Serb...
Repent with me,
Pedro, a servant of God.
- No, thanks.
- Great. I mean...
I'd feel great if Metod
gave me Southern hillbillies.
The old hag got the newlyweds?
He's fucking over his best salesman,
torturing him
like they tortured Jesus.
What about your clients?
Nice people. Father
and daughter. Intellectuals.
Now, just a line of good old...
H, to relax.
And that's it.
The best Flamingo salesman
having troubles with his prostate?
Shaking off is a problem, too.
Wanna help?
Of course!
Out of respect!
Get away from me,
you crazy bitch!
Just go ahead and shag, shag.
Batric loves faggots.
More faggots,
more pussy for Batric.
Batric likes to bang women.
Because women
make shopping decisions.
That's why I'd fuck the fat lady.
I'd fuck her husband, too,
if they sign.
Homey Pedro... homo Pedro,
you look pale.
Hundred Euro says,
that this little prick
is packing his bags tomorrow.
I'm in.
You little cunt.
You take care of it.
Thanks, man.
How come you're so cool?
I got my lucky pen.
Check this out.
Montblanc, 5000 Kunas.
For your lucky pen.
You'll be okay.
Come here.
Can I just touch it?
Can I kiss it?
I'm good now.
Our mascot and our agents
will take you inside
to continue with
individual presentations.
These who do not attend
lose the right to a free vacation!
My dear agents, please show
our dear guests inside!
Let's go. Come on.
- Paying in installments is an option?
- Let's go.
- Some real food inside?
- Of course, anything you want!
- This is regular procedure.
- Sit!
You're from Vienna,
you obey the rules.
Go.
Marital status?
Active.
Years of marriage?
Six, or seven?
Let's say, seven.
Education qualifications?
Annual income?
Rascals...
Look at this... real bliss.
- Are we going to swim?
- When we pluck up courage.
- I already plucked it.
- Really? Give me five.
Annual income?
Do I lie again?
Lie if you
plucked up your courage.
Have you?
- Let's see if Mom has the courage.
- Omer! Don't!
Let's see it!
You two!
This is exactly the same form
we already filled in Nis,
when we got the... voucher.
Why do I have to do it
all over again?
It seems that your husband
doesn't mind. Right. Slobodan?
Teachers are used to
filling up things.
- They're really good at filling up.
- Come on...
Lady...
we are on our honeymoon.
Forms and romance don't match.
Wipe your tears, my dear
Wipe your tears,
Your whole life lies ahead of you
Don't let the...
This one's even crazier
than our guy.
My husband sang this to me
on our honeymoon.
We were young,
just like you are now.
A week in Dubrovnik.
A dream come true... romance!
I'm so happy for you.
Six months later, he was dead.
Pancreas cancer.
We're sorry, truly.
Extremely.
No smoking here.
We care about your health.
We hoped I'd get pregnant
in Opatija.
It wasn't meant to be.
And you?
Do you plan any children?
I have to go to the toilet.
He'll finish this.
She's sick?
Bitch lies like a dog.
She keeps telling the same story.
She never had a husband.
- You should know that.
- Really?
She's a lesbian.
You better watch yourself.
Sugar, you can ask
for another agent.
I'd be really good to you. I'll be
good to your man, if I need to.
I can see that I turn you on.
It's only natural.
Type in your PIN.
All our operators
are busy at the moment.
Estimated hold time
is... 14 minutes.
- Maybe she's pregnant?
- No way!
- Too much in the sun, maybe.
- Maybe.
And maybe
an ownership over a condo
is the right thing
for newlyweds.
Let me finish this first.
What about this?
Education qualifications?
Airport tower?
Put down, "Croat war veteran”.
Got anything
against this college?
No! I say it's worth
more than a PhD.
Why do I get the feeling
that you're fucking with me?
Who, me?
You've got my deepest respect.
I got you by the balls now.
Do I put income
in Kunas or Euros?
Even if I thought of buying
something from you, now I won't.
Call the manager. Now!
What's up, boys?
Can't wait to hear our
special VIP offer?
This sissy here
never said a thing about it.
You don't like me?
I like you so much...
I've got the brains,
he's got the legs.
We, defenders...
We can easily
work something out.
- Where did you fight?
- You name it.
That's a real man,
you sleazebag.
I couldn't agree with you more.
- Where is your agent?
- I sent him to get a beer.
German beer!
No alcohol in this stage
of presentation!
Only a sober man
can change his life!
Maybe in your fucking Europe,
you sober cunt!
You can leave this
to your children.
We've got no children.
Don't fuck with me,
it says here "one son”.
Milena!
You put Bora in these.
How could I not put him in?
He is dead, you stupid woman.
14 years now.
Dead!
Love is the most beautiful
thing in life.
When you've got a summer house
you can use it for 52 weeks per year.
52 weeks to use it...
you've got 52 weeks
available to use it...
- to use it...
- But how much do you really use it?
You spend there
a week or two in the summer.
A week or two,
in the summer...
- A week or...
- You just keep on with your bullshit.
- For the summer...
- a week or two.
- And the maintenance, you pay...
- ..for all 52 weeks.
For the maintenance,
you pay all 52 weeks.
You can't use my account!
I'll lose my veteran pension!
How can that be profitable?
- How can that be profitable?
- No way.
How can that be profitable?
- Suck my dick!
- No way.
Fifty two weeks!
How can that be profitable?
I maintain the grave
of my Bora.
Fifty two weeks... every day.
In the summer, you use one
or two weeks out of fifty two...
Don't move.
I'll just go to...
Can you repeat that?
When you use..
From zero to hero,
from zero to hero...
- What's this? A cult?
- Like you would know.
You threaten an 80-year-old woman
with eviction? A shot of rakia.
- What?
- Rakia.
Contract? Do you really think that
I carry the contract with me?
Another shot.
It says that the place goes to auction
if you are three months overdue?
I don't care if it's fucking four,
I've been paying regularly
for five years now!
You'll get your money
by the end of the week!
I saw what you got
from that asshole.
If you were screwing my wife,
I'd simply kill you.
Without such a nasty revenge!
But I'm a man. I'll help you.
I got a great deal for you.
Come here.
You give me that Bosnian guy,
and I give you
the Viennese couple.
Viennese?
Sanitation manager?
Public toilet cleaner?
Try to fool one of the new guys.
- The dwarf, maybe.
- I'm begging you.
Half of your commission.
- You've got no heart, Savic.
- Thanks.
You can kiss
self-management goodbye!
Back to work, shit, now!
Good luck, Savic.
- Thank you.
- Coffee...
You shouldn't have...
We filled everything in.
- Bravo.
- Wait!
Where's my beer?
The Slovenian guy is strict
about it. Real asshole.
But...
I've got these.
- Anything for the client.
- This is good.
- Dad, you're boozing again?
- Omer, don't.
Leave me alone.
Shame on you.
Spilling the booze, while
children in Africa stay sober.
Omer...
Take mine. I'll lose my job.
Look, now...
We answered all your questions.
I've got a question for you now.
- Okay?
- Okay.
May 25th, 1995.
Does this date tell you anything?
- Omer, please, we're on a holiday...
- Zip it.
The Youth Day?
Fifteen years since
the death of Comrade Tito.
- Bravo. That's right...
- Mladen.
- You did military service?
- Back in 1988.
Bravo. I served in 1980.
The very year Comrade Tito died.
- You watched the funeral?
- Yes.
During the funeral, we stood
six hours in front of the TV.
The whole company.
Six hours.
- Like this!
- Take it easy.
Like this... 'Ten-hut!
The captain shouts:
"Salute to the TV!"
And for six hours,
we salute the TV.
Six hours,
during the whole funeral.
The whole company!
But the soldiers
start to fall.
They pass out and fall.
Belgrade boys, like you.
You don't give a fuck
the whole world came to pay
respects to our Marshall!
They went down already
when Brezhnev was there.
Before Todor Zhivkov.
Nicolae Ceausescu.
Erich Honecker, Sekou Toure,
Hua Guofeng.
Margaret Thatcher,
Anwar El Sadat
Saddam Hussein,
God rest his soul,
Indira Gandhi,
and that Kraut...
The German guy, Genscher,
Helmut Schmidt.
- Kenneth Kaundal.
- Sit down, people stare.
Great army story!
I had a guy from Bosnia
in my company, he was just like you.
He could say "Long live the Communist
party" while burping!
At Kim Il-Sung,
half of the company was down.
The captain is almost gone..
But he is still on his feet.
While I stand there...
like a rock.
Like a rock!
Vacationing is not
for such fools.
Like a rock!
Only a couple of us made it
to the end of broadcast.
Congratulations.
The captain says it too,
after the broadcast.
He, himself soaked in sweat.
But he says,
- Baslagic... congratulations.
- Are you done with this?
- And I sit down.
- Thank God.
- He'll fuck up our business.
- Wait!
A fool like him
is a real buyer.
How about you, kid?
Where did you serve?
I skipped the Yugoslav Army
because of the Croatian war.
It's like you haven't lived at all.
- I agree.
- I sit down.
But then... A rerun!
I stand in attention,
right away.
I salute. The captain
has no other option, he shouts,
- Salute to...
- To the TV!
Bravo.
You really fucked them up.
Fucked them up?
I fucked them up?
That's how you see it?
I was the last man standing
at the end of the rerun.
That's a joke for you?
Belgrade boy... everything
in life is just a joke for you.
Everything.
That is why you don't know
what happened on May 25th, 1995.
Be still!
Be nice, hear me?
I don't know.
A shell, 130...
a 130 mm shell.
Straight at the town square.
Full of young people.
Your people fired it
from the hills.
My people?
Seventy one killed,
150 wounded.
Between 18 to 23 old.
Don't be a mood killer.
This one here, nagging
about me killing the mood,
on a fucking free holiday.
She lost two of her cousins
that day.
Almost kids.
Kids.
Unlike you and me,
they didn't know the drill command.
“Atomic from the right”, means you
have to jump for cover ta your left,
and there was
no one there to shout!
Who would shout, anyway?
Who would shout at
the town square, like a fool?
“Atomic from the right!”
At the town square.
You can't shout like that.
Makes no sense.
Scram, boy, go play.
Stay in my sight, hear me?
Makes no sense.
Omer, please, we're on a holiday.
Nothing will bring back
my Saliha and Selima.
- That's all Muslim propaganda...
- Quiet down. Mother.
Grown men always end up
with army stories.
How pathetic.
But we, women, like to live
in the real world. Right?
There's something odd here.
What's odd?
Income.
It doesn't match the number
you gave at home.
Come on, Sonja.
Let me do my job.
Sometimes,
when people are on holiday,
they get more relaxed,
more... honest.
Have some water.
It will do you good.
Lying about income could
result in holiday cancellation.
Our local field agents
were clear about that.
And you signed.
I signed it.
Take me, father.
I want to draw some more.
Fuck the vacation and everything.
A perfect place
for children, isn't it?
Does it really have
to be that way?
It has to be!
But then again, not.
For some reason,
this Serbian loser likes you.
No one has to see this.
Is this okay, Baslagic?
Draw something.
You want me to draw you?
When you grow up.
That's for big boys, only.
Now sit here
and think about it.
I need your salesman
for consultation.
I'm sorry, urgent business.
The bad cop role
turns you on?
No.
I owed you this.
Can we talk?
This part really suits you.
Well done!
You've got a flat tire!
Fucking whore!
What does the lady boss say?
Is she canceling us?
No, she won't.
I managed to reason with her.
That's good.
You've got two options, Omer.
You can listen carefully
to what I have to say
about this special offer
for a week in the VIP condo.
- We will...
- Or...
I can tell you now
what happened or.
October 8th, 1991.
What happened to me.
I don't give a fuck about
what happened to you.
- Omer, please!
- No F words, Daddy.
I swear on my mother's grave.
Scram now,
bother someone else.
Who can afford a house
on the coast these days?
- Only the crooks.
- Only the crooks.
Stupid stork.
What are you drawing?
Look at him... and that
stupid haircut! Scram!
Someday, my son will
e grateful for this.
I'm already grateful.
You should be.
Mothers are sacred.
Skip the kiss.
Die, you little brat!
This is a full discount
for two weeks.
An honest, hard working man
deserves even better than
a house at the seaside.
Thanks to... this,
It's got air conditioning!
Vacation in a resort
that used to be reserved for
foreign guests only.
Do the nudist still come here?
- Milena!
- They used to come before the war.
No, madam.
We killed them all!
I killed at least three of them!
Just kidding.
Maybe the monthly payment
seems too large for you, but...
You won't have to pay
a single cent for a whole year.
- Isn't that really...
- We get what you're saying.
Bur every couple has some
priorities at the beginning.
Maybe in a couple of years...
A couple of years?!
I'm sorry.
I'm awfully sorry.
Here... you have an option...
To take a week
every other year.
That's not too much, is it?
Do it for me.
Please, take it.
You'll save my life.
Please... I'm begging you!
On your fuckin' knees,
crazy bitch.
Losing a job at my age is...
Aunt Olga, please don't.
Still a lot of cash.
How much is your commission?
Ten percent?
I can pay this, no problem.
But to fuck you up
a little is fun.
Now you're going to
suck my dick.
He can't get it up, anyway.
Is 2% enough for you?
Shut up.
I'm talking business!
We're having a chat.
- Sweets for them, too?
- No, they're bad boys.
So, how much does
this week of yours cost?
Your week. Maja. Ownership
As long as you are alive.
As long as your children are alive.
Grandchildren
and great-grandchildren.
For the next 99 years.
Man... if anyone in this country
thought 99 years ahead,
we'd never fought
against each other.
- Is this in Marks?
- No, in peanuts.
This kind of money you make
only during the war.
If you are a scumbag.
Okay.
But, if another war
breaks out between us
and this time you get rich,
you'll look for me first
about this deal, okay?
I'll look for you anyway,
Belgrade boy.
Omer, stop it, will you?
Can't you see we're kidding?
Toasting with fucking water.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
In Bosnia, you'd call it
a price for suckers.
That's the right word.
Would you be more interested
if the price suits you?
Well, it always
comes down to money.
- It's nice here. Right, Maja?
- Yes, it is.
Have you seen Svendy?
He's here somewhere.
Do you hear him?
I do, but I have
to find Svendy.
Go, it's a man's job anyway.
Have you seen my
title boy? Small, chubby.
Now, the best offer
for a poor guy like me?
- Free.
- Free?
That's a good one.
Svendy, when I get hold of you...
These Bosnians
are fucking up our deal.
I can't find him.
I'll go look outside.
Let me see it. Come on.
Negotiations between Serbia
and Bosnia are going well.
Brotherhood and unity
in business.
That's what I call democracy.
Bravo, Savic.
Bravo!
Twelve thousand?
That's our secret.
Savic is giving up
the lion's share of his commission.
A generous, good man.
I know, but this is not
a trifle, either.
Not for a used car.
But for a luxurious VIP condo?
In Bosnia, you have
a word for a respectable man?
- The Chief.
- Right. VIP, Chief.
- Just like our Mladen, here.
- Svendy!
Who else in Tuzla owns
a condo at an Adriatic resort?
Not the one you stayed in.
A much better condo!
Do you know what VIP means?
Fuck you and fuck VIP!
He threw up!
- I'll give my life for his!
- Let them do their job!
My son, my son.
Our dear guests...
Your attention, please!
Everything will be just fine
with the little boy
and the Baslagic family
will join us in no-time.
What are you talking about?!
The child just tumbled down
four meters!
To fall and bleed
is nothing to a child!
We've got important business to do!
Business? The ambulance just took
a child, you heartless prick!
The kid was a real
pain in the ass, still...
Assholes make children,
but they can't take care of them.
Why haven't you
taken security measures...
To express our care
for your well-being,
we're serving right now a buffet
with Adriatic cuisine.
Just keep it coming. Come on.
Barbarians!
They will never learn manners.
Uncivilized pricks!
You simply have to try this.
Get away from me!
All of you, get away from me!
I'm sorry!
I'm so sorry, please...
Jesus Christ...
Of all the fly-bys,
getting screwed by a fly-boy.
Has anyone made a deal yet?
A week, with a discount.
- Beginner's luck.
- I'll drink to that.
Two weeks. VIP.
No discount.
How about our salesman
of the year?
Two things set so far.
You... and him.
Fuck these long faces!
We still got a job.
Today!
Back to work!
Move!
Olga...
From zero to hero, don't forget that.
Look... he drew us all.
How much do you owe the bank?
Three grand,
for the past three months.
You bought your mother
a place in Beverly Hills?
A small flat.
In downtown Belgrade.
The Communists threw
her family out of the building.
I knew she'd like to die
in the place where she was born.
Four grand per square meter.
You can't expect an ex-junkie
to act rationally.
I'll go check on the kid.
This is yours.
You're the best salesman
I've ever met.
On your feet.
May I have
your attention, please?
Our friend
is going to the hospital,
from there, he will inform us
about little Svendy
and about his dear parents.
Way to go, young man!
He will have
some great news for us very soon!
From those 100 Euros
buy some fruit for the kid.
Dude, I have to work.
- Hey, say hello from me.
- Good luck, Savic.
If I said something wrong..
It's for your own good!
I am a mother!
I had to lie because of you!
- I have a baby!
- I have a discount.
Discount!
I'm a lousy mother,
wasting my time here!
Walking down the beach,
gathering shells!
Rubbing myself with oil!
I should rub shit on me!
Go ahead, throw me out of here!
I want to go home.
Right.
Okay...
Fuck, dude, the old hag
totally lost it!
We're totally fucked up!
Just give me that stuff
you've got.
Dude, I can't
Can't you see I'm fucked up?
I gotta pull myself together!
Dude, you fucking got me now!
Here, a bonus...
Montblanc.
We're going home.
- They gave him a CAT scan.
- Yes, scan.
He didn't even get
to swim in the sea.
All the time he drew the sea.
And these bloody birds.
What do the doctors say?
Badly bruised, but thank God,
nothing broken.
Good.
I mean... that's good.
That's good.
Thanks for coming.
Excuse me.
What the fuck...
Hi, Mom.
I'm not working, go ahead.
Let them call. Don't talk to them.
Tell them to call me.
Yes... and, Mom...
If those people come there,
don't let them in.
Even if they look
like nice people.
There are no nice people
in the bank.
I gotta go now.
Bye.
Problems?
Yes... sort of.
I hope you don't mind.
I'm just...
Trying to take
my mind off this...
What was the story you wanted to tell
me? When I bored you to death?
You bored him, alright,
That thing, in 1991.
What was that? Where?
Vukovar, Croatian war.
When I look at you,
I'd say that
all your life
you just chase pussy.
Well, that was
the original plan, but...
It seems the Army
had other plans for me.
The military police picked us up
in the middle of the night.
Me and my brother.
You don't look like
a volunteer, anyway.
Fuck man, I don't.
Half of Belgrade boys slept
every night at a different place.
Hiding from the mobilization.
When they finally caught us and put us
on a truck for the war zone,
he told me that he actually knew
they were coming for us,
Moron.
He didn't want to tell me.
He knew I'd run.
What can I tell you?
He wasn't the only one
who acted like that.
It was like... we lost it.
So? How long did you fight?
Eleven days.
- Wow, a true warrior.
- We got information...
that they were forming
a firing squad out of recruits.
To shoot the prisoners...
and civilians.
I didn't plan it to be
this way, but
I got drunk as a skunk.
My hand shook a little
when I fired.
I aimed at the pinky toe.
Fuck...
I almost lost my foot.
A real, fine wound.
But the pinky toe
made it through the war.
That's not funny.
- Well, it is.
- Here it is... like new.
How about your brother?
Let's forget these
silly army stories.
Baslagic.
It's still critical.
Critical? You said
nothing's broken.
The CT showed something
we call cerebral edema.
You said bruises and...
The fall caused a blood vessel rupture
and swelling of the tissue.
Blood vessel... in his head?
He'll get corticosteroids
for the swelling,
but we have to open the skull
to give the tissue some space.
Please, don't open my child's brain.
I don't want that...
You have to sign
this consent form.
- Do you understand me?
- Wait a minute.
You said nothing's broken,
just bruises.
Fuck this!
I'll go get him!
Mr. Baslagic!
If we don't do this,
you'll lose your child.
Omer...
Sign it. Trust him.
I'll sign it.
Let it be.
Just save him, please.
We are wired to the PA,
our thoughts are with you
and the Baslagic family.
How is our little Svendy?
Sonja, the kid is...
He'll be alright... we hope.
Little Svendy is alright!
That's not what I said,
that's not... Sonja!
There's more!
Our lovely Baslagic couple
have decided to buy
a week right here, in Flamingo,
because little Svendy
deserves this.
Little Svendy...
will have here
a safe place to stay!
I hope that all of you
will join this brave family.
From zero to hero... discount.
From zero to hero... discount.
From zero to hero...
I have to go now.
See you at the hotel.
Mladen?
Sit with us.
Please.
Come here.
You heard what the doctor said.
If everything turns out fine,
Svendy would like to come here
for the summer, wouldn't he?
You said it yourself.
It's perfect for kids.
We'd like to have
another look at the contract.
To think about it.
It must be in your briefcase.
Why would you think
I'd have the contract?
Because you have
the briefcase.
- Sonja, the kid is not alright!
- Is he alive?
- Yes, but they will open his...
- Great!
People just sign,
no questions asked.
This is the best
presentation ever!
You've done a miracle.
For you, for me.
For all of us.
And we've made it through this
fucking day just because of you.
For how much did you
rip off those Bosnians?
You can tell me.
Two weeks, at least?
Why do you go on vacation?
Because...
Because you want to relax.
Right?
- Right.
- Yes.
Bravo!
After ten years of vacationing,
what can you show? What?
A bunch of old photos
in a shoe box.
And memories...
ever fading memories.
There's nothing
you can do about it.
What about the money
you've spent in those places?
What about the money?
Where is the money?
It's gone.
You left it at all those
fucking places that you've been in.
- Right?
- Right.
So, it's gone.
It's spent. Gone.
This... you've got this at home.
Condos for ordinary people.
But this!
You've seen something like this
only on TV and
celebrity magazines. Right?
But why Omer and Maja wouldn't
go on the same vacation as...
Bono Vox, or...
- Angelina Jolie.
- Right!
And a couple of others, too.
Are Omer and Maja any worse than
those people in the magazines?
Are they?
The answer is... no!
They're not.
You can take
your friends with you.
You can have a good time with them,
have a barbecue.
You can even charge them!
- To charge our friends?!
- Of course!
It looks exciting...
it looks appealing.
But... "it's too expensive”,
you say to yourself.
"Can I afford this?”
Probably not.
Forget it
This is not just for anyone.
- But we didn't say anything.
- Yes, you did. I heard you. Here,
But 'can I afford this'
is not the real question here.
Because money's got
nothing to do with this!
This is the real question.
"Will I settle for petty things
for the rest of my life?"
"Will I pick leftovers
for the rest of my life?”
"Do these leftovers
define my whole life?"
And the mother
of all questions.
"Do I have the guts to take the
responsibility for my own life?"
That is the real question here.
Today, you have the chance to step
into a new period of your lives.
Recognize that chance.
Grab it.
Give me the pen.
I gave away my lucky pen.
Omer, wait.
Before you sign...
Take a look at this.
It says that you have to pay
the annual maintenance fee.
It's 350 Euros.
Do I have to pay now, in cash?
Wait. Take a look at this.
You can lose the right of ownership
if one year you miss to pay
the annual maintenance fee.
- Do you have 350 Euros on you?
- Here.
Here it is.
But you tell them
to paint the walls right now.
I want my Svendy
to stay in a neat room.
Painted in yellow! He loves
yellow, draws it everywhere.
The Sun should shine on everything,
he says. My clever boy.
Here.
Omer, don't buy this.
This is not for you, man.
We're not
good enough for this?!
For my Svendy, anything!
My Svendy is not
good enough for this?!
Do you hear me?!
You said, what can you show after
all those years of vacations?
Just a bunch of family photos!
I don't want to show just
a bunch of photos! I don't!
- Give me that pen!
- Give it.
Look at this, a fountain pen.
You managers are well off.
I haven't seen this
since the elementary school.
I learned to write
with a fountain pen.
With a ballpoint pen
you just spoil the handwriting.
- Where do I sign?
- Here.
Come here.
Here we are
In the jaws of changing times
You are turning into "You"
While we are turning
into a bunch of old jerks
Etiquette, conscience and solidarity
Stilt turn us on
Better a natural balcony
Than plastic popularity
The comic books generation
Drinking cold beer
Happy for no reason
We are still alive
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
We used to be the New Wave
Furious friends making music
Dancing the last ball
Playing the sharp guitar
We wanted a better world
Then the money ran out
And the good bunny
Turned into a fierce hunter
The comic books generation
Drinking cold beer
Happy for no reason
We are still alive
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
What would we do without dreams?
Without our voice?
What would we do without love?
What would we do without us?
Hardsub extraction, correction, resyncing: bruno321
Additional translation: Rambo1983