'Herra ja ylhäisyys' (1944) - full transcript

SUOMI-FILMI PRESENTS

AN ADVENTURE COMEDY
BY SIMO PENTTILÄ

LORD AND MASTER

As you can see, General,

your journey won't be a picnic.

And I wouldn't even send you there,

but I have to.

There's no one in
the United Mexican States I can trust -

the way I trust you.

Marshal.

Your mission is extremely classified.



You'll realize that from
these instructions,

which you'll be allowed to read
in Tehuantepec.

I tell it to you straight:

The future of this country,
which we both serve,

depends largely on -

how you carry out this mission.

You'll leave today. -Yes, sir.

My companions?
- No more than two men.

My Adjutant
Silvio Spottorno Ciudád Arguëlles -

and my soldier-servant Tlaca.

As you wish.

Farewell, General.
- Goodbye, Marshal.

My mother doña Brinida said
you're going to leave for Europe.

Is it true, General?



Señorita, I'm afraid it is true.

But I'll remember you forever,
even in Europe.

General, I love you.

I've loved you from
the first time we met,

when you came to stay with us.

I love you too, doña Carita.

No one can love you
the way I do.

Now it's too late, General!

My Lord, the carriage awaits.

Farewell, doña Carita.

Farewell, doña Brinida.
- I'll walk you to your carriage.

I love you. I've loved you
from the first time we met,

when you came to stay with us.

Doña Brinida, I have admired you too.

Farewell. -Farewell.

I fell asleep a little, My Lord.

El capitán has often
been falling asleep. A little.

During our journey.

But not anymore.

Except to eternal slumber
in Sierranueva -

where we'll arrive tomorrow.

You see, it's possible that
we'll be hanged there.

Understand? -No, My Lord.

Two pretty bodies hanging
from a rope, Silvio.

Tlaca makes three.
Although he's not that pretty.

I'm not afraid of dying.
It would just be nice to know -

if there's a way to avoid the noose.

I've just read
Marshal Juanaro's instructions.

The chance is one of a hundred
that we'll survive.

One? -Two at most.

Not more than that.

Dead? -I never shoot women.

I just dropped her pistol.
Poor thing got startled and fainted.

Hand me that whiskey.

You have small and beautiful hands.

And big, beautiful eyes.

Señor, I'll tell you everything.

Get Tlaca.

Now you may tell me, señorita.

My father, don Carlos Calvado,
the innkeeper...

Posadero may wind up dead himself.

He received a threatening letter.
If he doesn't...

They threatened you?
- Yes, señor.

That's why you...
- Yes, but I couldn't shoot.

Why?
- Do you even have to ask?

Who sent the letter?

Don Rodrigo Cortez.

Who is he?

Leader of one of Juanaro's juntas
in Sierranueva.

You'll meet him there.

He knows you're coming and hates you.
- And you, señorita?

You probably too...

...hate me?

Señor!

I have a fiancé.

This is a joyous time for you, señorita.

A month before and
a month after the wedding -

is the most blissful time of our lives.

Don't let me disturb your wedding joy.

Farewell, señorita.

Tell Tlaca to saddle the horses.

Tlaca, saddle the horses!

So? -Nicely put.

You know, no roughing up.
- You mean...

Like usual, someone's out to get us.
- What else is new?

So we'll turn ourselves
into archaeologists.

PROFESSOR HARLOW'S EXPEDITION

Attach a mosquito net to your hat.

My Lord,
I apologize for my laughter.

I am a man of principle, Silvio.

And mosquito nets are essential
for scientific expeditions.

Gentlemen, you're in luck:
you'll be getting our finest rooms.

This is the professor's room,
and this is the doctor's.

What was your name?
- Conchito, sir.

Now we're in the center of it all.

I don't understand, My Lord...
- Professor!

...the purpose of our expedition.
- The idea is to meet the president.

His name is Guillermo Vietano,
and he's a doctor.

But why did we come as scientists?
I have a feeling...

That President Dr Vietano,
former muleteer,

realizes immediately that Dr Simons
knows nothing about archeology.

Neither does Professor Harlow.
- Not as much as he's supposed to.

When the president finds that out,
he'll liquidate us.

Doctor!
- Professor?

Bring water!

What got into you? Sunstroke?

Gringo Americano! Por Dios!
Caraja de mierda! Sacramento!

Seems like your feelings are hurt.

Can you say...
- Where can we get some food?

Downstair restaurant.

I think that Concho guy
was spying on us.

You're quite the genius, Silvio.

Not an hour in Borona,
and already someone's spying on us.

Nevertheless,
we'll stay here for two weeks -

so that everyone will believe
we are archeologists.

Then we'll ask for a permit
from Vietano -

to travel to the seaside,
to San Bartolo,

where we'll begin
our scientific work.

We'll dig up roots, rummage the earth
and become more educated.

Do we have to dig?
Couldn't Tlaca do it?

Tlaca is not an archaeologist.
Archeology is important science.

And its roots...
- Couldn't we take canned food with us?

Miserable idea to get by
with mere roots.

Making a captain of you
must have been a mistake.

Mazo! -Señores?

I'd like to pay. -16 bolivas.

Is that the sum of full board
for two for a month -

in this damned hotel?

For this price you'll tell us does
the president have an audience today?

If he does, who do we need to turn to
to get an audience?

There must be a mistake.
I meant 6 bolivas.

It's this heat...

Colonel Bronza, Vietano's adjutant,
will help you get an audience.

Excellent!

The president will be glad
to meet you, Professor.

Colonel, the feeling is mutual.

That's why I'd like to know
when will this joy be granted to me?

Tonight. The president is having
a fiesta in his palace.

You'll get to meet
Borona's high society.

Cultured people.

Women, Professor.

The women of Borona.

Goodbye, Professor.
- See you tonight, Colonel.

Well?

He seemed harmless, General.
- Bien.

We'd better keep an eye on them anyway.

We'll give Conchito
specific instructions? -Agreed.

We'll ask the university to
send us information about them.

Tonight we'll go to
the president's fiesta.

We'll get to know His Excellency
and figure out what to do next.

I'll tell Tlaca that those creeps
are making my bowels cramp.

No.

Although medical examiners
wouldn't find any trace of Tlaca.

It's too early to begin open battle.

Live and learn, and I'll make you
a major when we return home.

If we return.

At least we can go to San Bartolo
to dig up roots.

A ship called Sweetheart arrives there.

An English scientist is on board.
He'll help us.

He's called Dr Cameron.

Cameron will bring us
scientific instruments.

They are extremely
important and valuable...

...for cultural history studies.

And their scientific name is perhaps
Madsen rifle.

And Marshal Juanaro has takes them
from his army to help us.

Then we'll...

The marshal's plan to bring
guns from Sierranueva -

by disguising them as
scientific instruments is so sordid -

that it could actually work.

Is the Cameron fellow really English?

I don't know yet.
He could be a crook.

Then we'd have a chance
to get out of this alive.

Gentlemen, I'm Goodwin,
the consul general of America.

I'm here about your interview
published in La Nación.

Please, take a seat.

Whiskey? -Naturally.

Camarera! A glass!

I've been in this Gehenna
for three years.

The word is not enough
to describe Sierranueva.

Everything here is filth.

And you're studying the archaeology
of this filth. Impossible!

An honest man won't survive here.

Even crooks have to be
very clever to get by.

No one can make deals here.
The president handles everything.

The secretary of trade is a zero.
The foreign secretary is also a zero.

Two zeros.
It's not easy to represent your country.

If you get in trouble,
you can come to me.

I take it your university will send
your obituaries to your families.

I assume we'll meet again tonight
in the president's fiesta.

What an act!

What do you mean?

The president is pretending to have fun,
but he's afraid of something.

Armed bodyguards in a fiesta
are new even in Sierranueva.

Señorita, His Excellency
expects to see you -

after the festivities.

Professor, His Excellency
wants to speak to you soon.

I'll come get you soon.
- Thank you, Colonel.

The word soon is foreign here,
except when tying a noose.

The president may sometimes
bend the rules.

He may hang you right away.

Apologies, but His Excellency
cannot see you tonight after all.

He had to leave for an additional
governmental meeting.

Tomorrow night
the president will see you -

and is happy to dine with you.

Goodbye, señores.
- Goodbye, Colonel.

Simons, let's go admire
the views of the palace.

I'm happy with this view.

If Vietano finds out that
the Croone University doesn't know...

Any Professor Harlow. -...and the name
Simons is also suspicious,

they'll embalm us before sunrise.

It's peaceful here
to make old age plans.

Making old age plans...

We“, I think...

Put that gun away!
Where have you been?

I've been waiting for you
for nearly an hour.

Close the door!

So you're Boone?
And he's Moonshine-Ted?

You know us, but...
- I'm Rodrigo Cortez.

Oh. -Is that so?

Did Hackett give you any instructions?
- No, nothing.

Told us to come here.

Did he get you those fine clothes?
- He did.

Go outside and wait for me
behind the president's palace.

I'll come right away. -Okay.

What's going to happen to us now?

Let's just find out
what Cortez is up to.

Who is this Cortez fellow?

He sent that girl to murder us
in Tehuantepec.

Carlos Calvado Fondaz.

Now he treated us as friends.
- Wavering character.

I think I'll take the safety off.

Let's head to Félipe's inn.

Sit down. Buenas tardes, señores.

Do these guys know the plan yet?

No. We'll go over it here.

I'm the head of Juanaro's junta,
Rodrigo Cortez.

You don't want to mess with me.

Do you know what Juanaro's junta is?

It will seize power from Vietano.

But because Juanaro is an old man -

and works in Mexico,
he made me the head of the junta.

With Hackett's help
I've put the ball rolling.

Marshal sent two Americans here,

who may be of help
because no one will suspect them.

But when they have finished
their mission...

...they will die.

The junta will take care of that.

Did you see them
in the president's fiesta?

Sure. Two dumb-looking fellows.

Especially that Dr Simons.

Professor Harlow didn't
look like a genius either.

Bueno.
You have to keep an eye on them.

We'll gun them down,
and you will take their place.

The intention was to kill them
in Tehuantepec,

but there was a malfunction
in the trusted girl's pistol.

Yes, indeed.

Ouch, my corns!
- Hackett told us.

Moonshine-Ted,
you'll be the professor.

Even though you don't
look very civilized, Boone,

you'll do as a doctor.

Now you can go,
but come back here in the evening.

Okay.

Madre de Dias.

It seems our role as scientists
turns out to be a brief one.

It's because you don't
look very civilized!

I'm not petty.

And Juanaro's politics
doesn't make me nervous.

After all,
I am lord and master.

Silencioso! Venir coma
pedrada en ojo de beticario.

Why at the right moment?
- Two crooks are in the general's room.

And one is snoring
in the captain's room.

Can I poke them a little?
- We're not in Mexico, Tlaca.

Take your pistol, Silvio.
But don't shoot right away.

A moral reminder of a quick death
will have enough effect.

Now!

Hands up!

Show yourself!

Now would be a good time
to poke a little.

Which one is Boone and which is Ted?

I'm Boone. And I am Ted.

Go on! -We're sailors.

The captain of Sweetheart, Cameron,
arranges work for us.

This job was for Hackett.
- We don't kill from behind.

We would've just captured you
and taken to Félipe's inn.

Hackett thought you'd be safer there.

What kind of man is this Cameron?

These fellows don't know
who Bill Cameron is!

He's not afraid of even the devil,
but the devil is afraid of Bill.

Tlaca! -Which one first?

Neither. Go see the third one.

If he tries to wake up,
take care of him.

Without your machete!

So Doctor, now we should decide -

where these fellows
could quietly disappear to.

You don't mean to kills us, do you?
- Quiet! They're civilized people!

But that redskin looked
so playful with his knife!

That redskin may get to take
your scalps as souvenirs -

if you don't tell. us about Hackett.

We don't know him that well.

President Vietano is the reason
why he turned from rich to poor.

That's why he hates Vietano.

As he can't hate him enough alone,
he's joined Cortez's gang.

His junta, as it's called here.
- And...

That's all we know.
- When he hired us,

we said it's a nasty job
to target Americans.

They can be nasty right back at you.

Hackett laughed and said
that the professors just dig up dirt.

Hackett won't be laughing very long.

What should we do about you two?

The third one is awake and drunk
out of his mind. I should poke him.

If you have to leave, we'll give you
our word we won't escape.

Yes, our word!
- And we keep our word!

All right, you'll stay here.

This job seems pretty wretched.

Bad hangover? -No joke.

I'm Torkka. Toivo Taavetti Torkka.

More or less honorable citizen
of the Republic of Finland.

Former medical school graduate -

whom destiny has thrown
into this cursed hole.

Is that so?

I've been around,
and I know how vast the world is.

There aren't many Finns in the world,
but wherever I go,

I run into an honest Finn.

However, enlighten me:
what are you doing in my friends room?

In your friends room? Well, well.

I put all the blame on cognac.

I drink only cognac.

Mistakes happen, even to Finns.

No joke. I'm staying at this hotel too.

Happen to have any cigarettes?

Thank you.

Now if you'll excuse me,
I'll go sleep in my own room.

Later we'll have a drink to our
new friendship, Mr...

Professor Harlow.

Drinks with Mr Professor.
I recommend myself to you!

No joke.

Did El capitán stay behind?
- He left after the señorita.

Caramba! Mind the prisoners!

What if they try to escape?
- Poke them.

At last! Gracias!

My apologies, señorita,
for my amazement.

I see that I've been gravely lied to.
- What ever do you mean?

I've been lead to believe that
Goddesses don't exist.

Señor, you're quite the don Juan, but...

...even so or maybe
because of it... Sit.

I hear you're a foreigner.
- I am.

Are you staying for long in
Sierranueva? -I don't know.

For you,
I'd stay for the rest of my life.

I wish you would stay for a long time.

Señorita, you're like
an indescribable flower.

The depth of your eyes
cannot be measured.

No one has spoken to me like
you're speaking to me now.

I'm not talking about love.

If I'd now say that I love you,
it would sound ridiculous.

I have never kissed you.

Still know how wonderful it would be.

Is it love?

And that I'm talking to you like this
after a minute's friendship, tell me...

What is it?

I would never laugh at love

Señorita, I swear it's true

I feel a fiery ardor

From under your veil of lace

Eternal wonder is a woman

She's a saint and a devil

She could take my soul

I'll sell it for one kiss

In your small seashell ear

I'll swear whispering

Close to you, señorita

I would never laugh at love

Life is wonderful.

And night. And your soul, señorita.

Be the grace of a beautiful story.

And guide this traveller
with a soiled soul to a place -

that is like your eyes.
As indescribable and true.

To a place
where there's always moonlight.

Where hibiscuses bloom.

Let me kiss you once more.
Because time goes by,

and happiness doesn't know time.

Señor has kindly been talking with me
while you were gone, Ramiro.

The carriage awaits. It's time to leave.

Goodbye, señor.
- Goodbye, señorita.

Well?

We sat here awake the whole night.
We didn't know -

if our word denied sleep as well.
- It didn't.

When the doctor gets back,
we'll decide where to hide you.

Maybe you have relatives
who could give us full board?

The kind who don't talk about poking
like that barbarian.

Where were you?
- I wasn't looking for a funeral home -

but a safe place for our prisoners.
- My, my. On your own initiative!

I found one in Boca, in the outskirts.

The owner, Juliana, looks like
a snake worshipper.

For a few bolivas she'll take care of
Boone and Ted.

Like a mother sees after her sons,
even to the grave.

What is that?

Let's find out.

You realize... -Of course.

We keep our word.

All hell is let loose!
- What a vile bloodbath!

Vietano's gendarmes ran.
You should go before they return.

Thank you for the crucial shot.

What was this all about?

We made sure the señorita
whom you sat with could escape.

Vietano's gendarmes are looking for her.

I see you're a caballero, not a vaquero
whose suit you're wearing.

Perhaps I can repay you somehow.

I hope to meet you tonight
at Félipe's inn.

Goodbye, señores.

Félipe's inn.

The señorita, on whose behalf
many men just died,

will also be there.

You've learned to guess
what I'm thinking, Silvio.

It's odd that we're supposed to meet
Cortez in the same inn.

First we'll take the prisoners
to a safe place.

And then we're having dinner
with the president.

Explain how we're going to
manage all this.

First you tell me
what that yelling is all about.

I think now is the time
to poke a little.

Have the prisoners been troublesome?
- Not at all.

But the new prisoner screamed a lot.
- New prisoner?

Are you starting a prison camp?
- Who is it?

Conchita. He tried to sneak into
the general's room.

I stopped him, and he screamed.
But not anymore.

You didn't... -No.

The third crook came to help.
He woke up from the screaming.

Come in! There's room yet.

We had some disagreements,
but not anymore.

If I lift up that blanket, he dies,
according to my calculations.

We can take him along with
our prisoners to the same place.

Your prisoners? Is this about revenge,
mutiny or just a desire to be hanged?

I guess hanging. But we can call it...

...politics. -Sure.

That racket is probably politics too.
Be quiet!

A lot of politics is done
in Sierranueva.

Sounds like the criminal law.
Probably Borona's gendarmes.

Come in!

Two gendarmes entered your room.
One said:

In the name of law, I arrest you!
- Boone and Ted.

No, Professor Harlow and Doctor Simons.
- Right.

They were easy to get rid of.
Go back to listen, Tlaca.

This fellow is
the root of all crookedness.

Life is only a mere moment.

Drink up, you drat!

How long will it take?
Where do we put the body?

In this heat who would want to
start digging up a grave?

He just fell asleep for a few hours.

Now he'll be easier to handle.

Now it's time to introduce myself.

I am... -Toivo Taavetti Torkka.

Right, no joke.

Right, I already...
- Yes, but we didn't.

May I introduce: Lord and Master
Lieutenant General-

T. J. A. Heikkilä,
commander of Mexico's 3. corps -

and the governor
of Sonora's military district.

And his adjutant, Staff Captain
Silvio Spottorno Ciudád Arguëlles.

Both by chance in Sierranueva.

So you're not a professor
like I remembered?

No joke. It's not my business anyway.

Judging by your name,
you're an honest Finn.

Now Adjutant, go get us
a mule or a donkey,

so we can drag that guy
to Félipe's inn.

Félipe's inn? -No joke.

Félipe will understand. Besides,
he's one of president's cronies,

and Félipe isn't too fond of them.
Neither are we.

Except if they're girls! No joke!

It's good that you caught that crook.

You saved Juanaro's men
from the trouble.

Cortez will probably have him killed.

Welcome, señores.

Our friend will assist you
if needed, señor.

I need your help.
What I'm about to do is daring.

As daring as you?
- What do you mean?

Haven't you read the newspaper today?

La Nación has your picture
on the front page.

Don Ramiro, the marquis of Vistahermosa.

Madre de Dias.

Madre de Dias.

How do you know don Ramiro?
- Why?

Boone, don't you get it?

If Cortez walked in,
everything would backfire.

We met don Ramiro here.

Cameron will vouch for the third guy.

Never mind him!

Cortez's plan is falling through.

You and Ted were supposed to
play Americans.

You would've waited for Cameron's ship,
and all would've been well.

But now! -Now what?

Aren't we good enough in these clothes
to pass off as Americans?

Ay, caramba!

Vietano has imprisoned
the real. Americans.

You can't pass off as
Harlow and Simons anymore.

Where did you snatch Conchito?
- He was lurking outside.

Spying, of course.
He'll be dead soon enough.

Earth rest lightly.

What does Cortez
have against us meeting...

...Don Ramiro?

Don Ramiro is the only man
who Cortez respects.

But then...
- You're a fool, Boone!

If Cortez respects him,
he's also afraid of him.

And Cortez's fear is hatred!

The marquises of Vistahermosa
used to be the viceroys of our country.

People have always loved them.

That's why Vietano hasn't dared
to hound don Ramiro until now -

that don Ramiro has announced -

he's running for president
in the next election.

Caramba!

Now I get it!

It said in La Nación that
20,000 bolivas would be given -

to whoever hands don Ramiro
to Vietallo's gendarmes.

Today when I met Cortez,
I foolishly told him -

that don Ramiro is hiding at my inn.

Cortez read La Nación and laughed
as he told me to make sure -

that don Ramiro would be here tonight.

Madonna mia! I told you!

I bet it's the gendarmes.

We better scram.
There's a backyard?

Open up, in the name of law!
Resistance means death!

Yes, it does.

We'll escape through the back door.
Don Ramiro, get the señorita.

Silvio, make sure the road
through the patio is clear.

I guess we're not having dinner
with the president anymore.

Señorita,
unfortunately we must escape.

You're not afraid, are you, señor?
- Yes, señorita.

Now I'm afraid. Of your loveliness.

That's the only thing
that makes me weak.

You know why they came here!
- No!

If the inn is surrounded...
- Walk in front and stop whining!

Torkka, caramba! Come on!

Who fired in the empty tavern?
- I did. Like this.

Can you run, señorita?
- Where to?

The outskirts of Boca.
The gendarmes won't go there.

Caraja!
I can't find the way in this darkness.

I can.
- Why, Tlaca. Guide us!

They're going to Boca.
Hurry if you want to catch them.

Remember: half of the bolivas are mine!
- Of course.

Get going!

Obey]!

Yesterday you said two men.
Now there's more!

I can't hide all of you.
Not for the same fee.

We'll agree upon your fee indoors.

Just give me the bolivas first!

Excelencia, don Ramiro!
-Juliana, what a lucky coincidence!

Get us a horse and a carriage!
- Si, excelencia.

We can trust Juliana.

But we shouldn't have trusted Félipe.
He stayed behind.

If he hadn't, we would have left him.
- No joke.

That deceitful Félipe probably knew
the gendarmes were coming.

Where do we go next?

El Moncayo mountains.
Doña Camilla has a hacienda there.

May I introduce: señorita Escajadillo
doña Camilla Maria Teresa.

T. J. A. Heikkilä, lieutenant general.

The commander of Mexico's 5. corps.

The governor
of Sonora's military district.

Your humble servant, doña Camilla.

The Lord's adjutant,
Staff Captain -

Silvio Spottorno Ciudád Arguëlles.

Your humble servant, doña Camilla.

Toivo Taavetti Torkka.
Drunk and a rascal.

In everyone's service. No joke!

General, your good reputation
precedes you here in Mexico.

Now we'll surely get to Moncayo safely,
doña Camilla and I.

No joke! The general and
the captain should suffice.

I'll stay here with Tlaca
to figure out the situation.

The carriage awaits, excelencia.
- Gracias.

The captain and I ought to
change our appearance.

Juliana, can you get them disguises?
- Si, excelencia.

Señores.

Tlaca, close the shutters!

We've been waiting for you, padres.

Malpico's souls have been waiting for
the blessing hand of the church,

which your bishop promised to send
for the market fair.

You have been mistaken.
The bishop didn't send us.

We're just poor monks on our way
to the monastery in Encarnación.

The bishop has forgotten
his promise then.

But saints haven't forgotten us
since they lead you here.

It's your holy duty to hold the mass,
baptize our children -

and bless our livestock.
- Deus ex macllina.

Thank you señorita and señor -

for letting us travel in your carriage.

I hope we'll soon meet again, padre.

May saints protect you on your journey.

Please,
step into my humble abode, padres.

Do you think they will get back
to Borona safely, Ramiro?

I'm sure of it, Camilla.

What are you thinking, Camilla?
- I...

I'm thirsty. The road has been dusty
and the day hot.

I know a small cantina near the town.
I'll buy you some wine.

Ride forth so we don't attract
attention. I'll follow behind.

Vietano's dragoons!

Stop!

In the name of the president I take
you prisoner, señorita Escajadillo.

Madre de Dias.

Posadero! Whiskey, pronto!

How was your mass?
- I'm going mad!

Here you are, padres.

Where does the bishop live?

I feel like booting that geezer.

Not that l couldn't handle a mass.
I've been to taverns before and...

The collection bag
is full of bolivas.

But today I should still bless
pigs, oxen, sheep...

and caramba!
- Your words offend the honor of my robe.

Whiskey, pronto!

Si, señor! Si, Si, Si!

He looks familiar.

We better scram. When the people
of Malpico get more drunk,

they're going to make us
marry someone.

The evening mass is
also tedious business.

We should pay first.

Mansedumbre monks
never pay for anything.

Your blessing, padre?
- I apologize for Pinestrello.

He didn't mean to offend you.
We could really use some help.

Please join us, and I'll explain.

I'm don Sandro.

Nomen est omen.
- Thank you, padre.

We've been waiting
all day for a priest,

but he's nowhere to be seen.

So I ask you to perform an important
ecclesiastical ceremony,

which you have the power
and duty to perform.

Vestigia terrent.

What is your name, padre?

Toribio.
And my brother here is Tomés.

My ranch is an hour from here, and
a wedding is about to take place there.

The groom and the bride are waiting.

Let's go!

Muchos gracias, señores.

You may rest a while.
Then we'll begin the ceremony.

Lola! Bring the fathers
a bottle of our best wine.

See you soon, padres.

We're doomed!
- Do you know how weddings proceed?

I'm a bachelor!
You'll do a better job.

Mumble something and
shriek a few words in Latin.

Then the I do's, and you're done.
A bag of bolivas is ours.

Will the padres stay for the night?
- I think we have to.

Be careful, padres.
- What do you mean, my daughter?

The spirit of don Malpico,
the builder of this place, is restless -

in his unblessed grave
because of his sins.

That's why during new moon,
on Thursdays, at midnight -

this place is haunted by his ghost.
- Saints will protect us.

Who is don Sandro?

Sandro de Sagasta y Zurnaman
y Fuentes Rios y Balsamilla!

You haven't heard of him?

He's known as don Sandro
only in this region.

Elsewhere he goes by the name of
General Cabeza.

I told you he looked familiar.
If...

Of course he'll find out who we are.
Otherwise all this would be a lie.

I'm my mother's only son.
I'm removing the safety on my pistol.

Relax. He isn't aware of
the secularity of our robes yet.

Maybe he never will be
unless you mess up the wedding ceremony.

Padres,
the bride and the groom are waiting.

Anemone nemorosa.

Which one carries out the ceremony?
- My brother, Toribio.

And Tomás will play the organ.

I don't play well, don Sandro,
but I'll do my best.

Don Sandro, the ceremony may begin.

Alea iacta est.
O sancta simplicitas.

O tempora, o mores.
My son, do you take...

It's Harlow, General,
and the other one is Doctor Simons!

Caramba, Conchita!

You've been sleeping for a long time.
- What happened?

You were hit in the head when
they realized you weren't a padre...

What about padre Toribio?
- I don't know.

I doubt he's a padre either.
He's so skilled with a pistol.

He's disappeared,
and no one can find him.

I'm afraid they'll hang you.
Cabeza is in an awful mood.

It saddens me to know that no one
has ever escaped his estate.

Until now.

Mister Staff Captain!

Have the thugs tormented you?
- And you?

When you were hit with a branch,
I escaped and got lost in this cellar.

I saw the bars on these windows
and thought -

that no one will think to
look for me here.

I went to the cell next to this one,
and no one came there.

I came here and... the end.
I don't have to repeat myself, do I?

No, My Lord. -I know
where doña Camilla's bedroom is.

I heard Cabeza and Lola talking
when you were dragged here.

Right.

We'll free doña Camilla
from the clutches of those thugs.

I have a plan how everything will go...
-...wrong.

Horribly wrong.

No one can think of a plan
that would work here.

Today is Thursday and new moon.
- So it seems.

It's almost midnight.
- Do you mean...

That's right.
Don Malpico's spirit is restless -

in his unblessed grave because of
his sins. Remember Lola's babble?

I remember.
- There are sheets in the other cell.

I came up with the idea from the sheets.
- I want to do some haunting too.

I saw a ghost!
- A ghost and a bogeyman and caramba!

Let's hear her out.

I was bringing the guards some wine,
and then it appeared!

There must be more ghosts!

Maybe ghosts are having
a club meeting tonight.

What appeared?
Talk and don't stammer!

Don Malpico's ghost, Master.

That damned ghost will ruin our chance.

Where did it come from?
- Who knows.

I felt the horrible reek of death
and heard a dead man laughing.

The laughter was cut short.
That's a sign of death, they say.

Don Malpico may haunt
as much as he pleases.

What are you planning to do with Simons?

We'll torture him in the morning,
Excelencia.

Maybe he'll share information
when we cram resinous sticks -

under his nails and light them on fire.

He ruined my whole day!

The bishop arrives in the morning.
At ten doña Camilla will be yours.

What is one more day?

After all,
we're talking about 12 million bolivas.

But one more night!

This must be Doña Camilla's room.

Quien es?

It's me, doña Camilla,
Lieutenant General T. J. A. Heikkilä.

Lord and master!
- We've come to your rescue!

Put the safety on.

Please, save me!
If Vietano marries me,

the remaining resistance will crumble.
- Why?

Marriage is sacred, and don Ramiro
would have to stop fighting for me.

Don Ramiro...
-...is my cousin.

I'll save you, doña Camilla.

My Lord, I...

...like you.

I didn't mean it like that.
- Neither did I.

But why should we always mean it
like that or...

...like this?

Finally! And now
I'll be don Malpico's ghost.

I'll walk in front
since I'm the one with the pistol.

That door probably leads to the patio.

I'll open the door,
and you'll jump up.

If someone's there,
we better act very ghostly.

Don Rodrigo Cortez!
- Get off of me!

I heard what the president
was scheming, doña Camilla.

I came to rescue you!
- Too late!

You have already been married?
- No, but we were here to help her first.

We'll walk across the patio
as ghosts.

Caramba! Why are you howling?

Malpico's laughter means death
when it's cut short.

Remember Lola's babble!

The horses are there and no guards!
My laughter did the trick.

Why didn't you come meet me at the inn?
- We did.

But so did a million gendarmes.
- So?

We aren't too fond of them.
- They are looking for don Ramiro.

Señores, they followed us!

There must be quite a bunch.

I'll stay behind,
so you'll be able to escape.

I'll never leave you behind.

Giddyup!

Stop!

Give me the pistol!

Quien es?
-Just open!

Soon some horsemen will ride here.
Don't open the door for them!

Si, señor. -When they ask you
have you seen or heard anything,

you'll say that someone just rode past.
- Si, señor.

Lie so that they believe you.

Otherwise, your family will become
very sad. -Si, señor.

They're coming!

We're Cabeza's men.
We're after dangerous rebels.

Have you seen them? -No.

But I heard them riding
on the road to the monastery.

You did well, Boone.
How did you think of this place?

An old sailor can find a jail
even in the dark.

Did you say a jail, señor?

Isn't this the area's godforsaken jail?

And you're the police.
- I'm a gravedigger.

And this is
an epidemic diseases hospital.

Cabeza's men wouldn't have come in
even if I'd invited them.

I have three yellow fever patients
in the back room.

People are afraid of yellow fever.
They think it's infectious.

That means we're safe.
Bring us some food and wine.

Yellow fever!

What a dishonorable death
to the brave officers of Mexico!

Your fear of yellow fever
has gone too far.

Señores!

One move and our friend,
the gravedigger, gets work.

So you're not Cameron's men?

We're no one's men.

We're ourselves.
- Us.

Shall I give the horses some water?
- Go!

Señorita, lower your hands.

Did you know the identity of these men?

Of course, and you should too.

Or maybe you're not the leader
of Juanaro's junta? -I am!

But they know secrets
for which they have to die.

From this distance
even you'll hit your target!

What kind of organization
has such a fool as their leader?

You offend me, señorita!

I'll forgive you on the day
of our wedding.

Marriage! You're not only a fool,
but also a parading clown!

And you would save Sierranueva?

Juanaro may be an old man,
but I still question his poor judgement!

So do I. -Me too.

Right. He won't bother us anymore.

Tlaca should be here to poke him.

Gravedigger will take care of him.

I think he'll catch yellow fever
and move someplace else.

He'll catch yellow fever.
- Why did you help us?

I couldn't watch that dishonorable
civilian disrespect monks.

Festina lente. -Padres.

You better hurry up to Borona.
- But Cabeza would find us there.

Cabeza and Vietano have lost
all their power in Borona.

People have started
a rebellion in Borona. -Bueno!

Viva la revolución!

Viva la libertad!

Seems like this station
doesn't follow a schedule.

Let's find out. Surely there's still
a stationmaster here.

Are there any trains
leaving for Borona today?

No. People are rebelling in Borona.

Cameron, the foreign dog,
has joined the rebellion with his men.

They mean to overthrow Vietano.

You mean Captain Cameron?
- Si, padre.

The president is traveling by
an additional train to defeat them.

Sorry, duty calls.

The president's train just arrived
at the station.

At least the president's train
leaves today.

Bueno! We'll take it.

Señorita y padres, not here!
This is the president's train!

It's also our train, got it?

Hands up,
or you wife will become a happy widow.

Have a seat, señorita.

Does the train stop somewhere
before Borona?

No. The president is in a hurry to
stop the rebellion.

How many thugs are on the train?
- About 300.

General Cabeza and Colonel Bronza.

We need to get this train off track.

Doña Camilla, do you know Cameron?

No.
He's probably Cortez's henchman.

Ready to sell out to the highest bidder.

I'm not so sure.

Remember Boone and Moonshine-Ted's
devoted words about Cameron, Silvio?

He's not your most regular thug.

The train has gone off the track!

Stop driveling!

The train must have simply
switched tracks.

There's no other track.
One track goes straight to Borona.

I can't see much,
but we're clearly on tracks.

It must have been built by diablazo!

Bien! So the train is going to...

Get out quickly!

Conchito didn't feel any pain
when he died.

Caramba!

I hear bubbling,
but I can't see anyone!

Wrong station.
The reception isn't too welcoming.

Let's climb up to see
how many there are.

Torkka!
- Heikkilä! Lord and master!

When did you become
one of Vietano's gendarmes?

A few hours ago.
I was waiting for the president.

But the damned train drowned
the president before I could do it.

We built this track with
Cameron and his men,

but it couldn't withstand the train.
A few bolts came loose.

The track you built?

Not entirely.

The groundwork was
done a long time ago.

Vietano took the funding for himself,
and the railroad was never finished.

We finished the track and
rebelled a little -

so that Vietano would come
by train to defeat us.

Of course he tried to come!
No joke! just like we thought!

Who is we?
- Come meet them!

There's an old station nearby.
It's our headquarters for now.

Captain Cameron, may I introduce:

señorita Escajadillo,

señor General Heikkilä,
señor Captain Arguélles.

And... Who's this? -No one.

Scram! And tell your wife
about your miraculous rescue!

I'm glad you're here, señorita
and señores. -My love!

Vietano had disgustingly bad luck.

Fell in the water! Please sit down.

Captain Cameron,
we would like to know a few things.

Maybe you could...

I came to Banana yesterday
and found Torkka and don Ramiro -

who had started a rebellion.

I didn't want anything to do with
Juanaro's junta. -Why?

It's just a club for thugs.

Cortez plotted only
for his own advantage.

He wanted to destroy Vietano,

but he plotted against Hackett
and Juanaro as well.

He even stole Sweetheart's weapons load.

He sold it for a good price
to someone in South America.

Dirtbag from birth.
-Just like Juanaro.

General, he send you here
so that he could seize power in Mexico.

He knew you were a supporter
of the current government.

He hoped you would die
in the rebellion -

and believed he could
take over this country.

Hackett is a thug as well.

He hid until we got the rebellion
off to a good start.

Now he's plotting something
by pretending to be Cameron.

His plotting ends here!
No joke, Mr Hackett!

You're mad! I am Cameron!
- That's a damned lie!

Because I'm Captain Cameron!
- You?

No joke! And I can prove it.

I got Boone and Ted to vouch for me.
Come here!

They can confirm that I am Cameron.

It's clear as day.
- We'll give you our word.

And we keep our word!
- Now everything's in order. No joke!

I think we should hold
a drumhead court-martial.

Mr Hackett is accused of
the murder of President Vietano.

He loosened the rail bolts.
- We are witnesses.

We give you our word.
- And we keep our word!

No joke! Move it!

Now I declare you, don Ramiro,
the new ruler! -Good!

Señor General, señorita Escajadillo
wants to speak with you.

Bueno.

Señor General, this way.

My Lord, at don Sandro's
hacienda I told you...

Remember? ...that l like you.

Doña Camilla, I'll remember it forever.

My Lord, now I'll say it again:

I love you!

Don Ramiro knows my feelings.

Although it's been decided
that we are to be married,

and our union would bring people
together to support us,

he doesn't want to be
in the way of love.

And I have, have you!

I love you too, Camilla.

More than you know.

And that's why... -That's why.

I'll travel away.

Why are you so pale?

You're like a white flower
when you turn pale.

You're lovely.

But your loveliness is not for me,
but for Sierranueva.

I don't understand. -I leave you
with eternal longing.

Farewell, my love.
I'll remember you forever...

...even in Mexico.

Welcome, My Lord.

You talked with doña Camilla?
- Yes, Your Excellency.

I congratulate you on your marriage,

which the whole Sierranueva
is eagerly waiting for.

Your Excellency,
I've come to say farewell.

The country I serve is calling.

I'm traveling to Mexico
today with my adjutant.

I thank you for the service
you have done for my country.

To show my appreciation, I give you
the highest honor of my country.

Our nation will
respect and appreciate us.

We'll begin the rebellion next week.
Everything is ready.

Nothing stands in our way.

Except Lieutenant General
T. J. A. Heikkilä.

Lord and master.

Marshal, you told me
when I left for Sierranueva -

that the future of this country
depends on -

how I carry out the mission.

Bueno! I've survived!

But you won't survive!

You do understand that, don't you?

Now!

English subtitles: Marja Kauppila
Saga Vera Oy