Happy Death Day 2U (2019) - full transcript

Tree Gelbman discovers that dying over and over was surprisingly easier than the dangers that lie ahead.

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Resynced by bozxphd. Enjoy The Flick.

Shut up!

Oh, hey. You're up.

Yeah, I wasn't sure if you,

you know, wanted to...

sleep in or not, so...

Am I in a dorm room?

Uh... yeah.

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone. ♪

Where are my clothes?

O-On the dresser.

I... folded your pants

last night,

and I wasn't sure

if that... material

- gets wrinkled.

- Great.

Uh...

don't know if you remember

my name or not.

- Uh, pretty wasted last night.

- Got Tylenol?

What?

My head is killing me.

Do you have any Tylenol?

Yes.

I do.

Uh, sorry.

Thanks.

I'm Carter, by the way.

Not a word of this

to anyone. Got it?

Yeah. Sure.

Dude, did you hit

that fine vagine or wha...

Nice one, dickhead.

Yeah, that'd be fine.

Hey.

Stop global warming? I...

- Oh.

- Oh!

- Come on!

- ♪ On the wall, 63 bottles of beer ♪

♪ On the wall, 63 bottles of beer... ♪

26 hours, that's all you've got?

♪ Bottles of beer on the wall ♪

- I can't hear you!

- ♪ 62 bottles of beer on the wall ♪

♪ 62 bottles of beer ♪

♪ You take one down,

pass it around ♪

- Keep going!

- ♪ 61 bottles of beer on the wall... ♪

Hey.

Hi.

You haven't...

returned any of my texts.

Yeah. Sorry, I've been busy.

Yeah. I can see that.

Okay, Tim, we went on a date.

One.

I don't have to text you back.

We're not, like, a thing.

Okay. I just...

you know, I figured

we had a nice time...

You had a nice time.

I was miserable.

I mean, who takes

their first date to Subway?

It's not like you have

a footlong.

Does this look infected to you?

Ew!

Someone drank my kombucha.

Oh, my God.

You sneaky little beyatch.

Who was it?

Nobody.

Sisters don't keep secrets.

- Seriously, it was nobody.

- Well,

I hope "nobody" used a condom.

We don't want "somebody"

- looking like a whore.

- Thanks, Danielle.

Super helpful.

What are sisters for? Oh.

And don't forget,

- house meeting at lunch.

- Living for it.

Hmm.

She finally rolls in.

Did I totally embarrass myself

last night?

Not at all.

Unless you consider dancing on

a table, starting two fights,

and barfing pretzel chunks

all over the bar embarrassing.

Please tell me you're kidding.

Oh, and you also rammed your

tongue down Nick Sims' throat

right in front of Danielle.

Oh, God,

but she was so nice to me

this morning.

Yeah, I think she was

as drunk as you last night,

so consider it

collective amnesia.

Oh, thank God for that.

Oh... crap,

I'm so late for class.

Can't find my damn book.

Ha!

Did you really think you

could keep it a secret from me?

- How did you find out?

- Driver's license.

Not the best picture,

I might add.

- I assume you changed my ringer, too.

- Who, me?

Never.

What'd you wish for?

- A new roommate.

- Wench.

Uh... I made that from scratch.

Sorry. Too many carbs. Toodles.

Locomotive response

in the subject shows

an acceleration

across the quantum plane.

This creates

great orbital overlap

between the partially positive

beta carbon...

and the partially negative

hydrogen alkali group.

♪ ♪- Thanks.

Get your school spirit on

before the big game.

Ten percent off

with your student ID.

And we still need to pick

this year's charity.

I can say right now,

there's no way we're doing

the Special Needs

Art Fair again.

Totally freaked my shit out.

Thoughts.

What's wrong?

Oh, I don't know.

What's wrong, Tree?

Nothing. Except

for that cat lady buffet

you just dumped at our table.

And is that

chocolate milk I see?

I missed breakfast.

What is breakfast, Becky?

- Oh! I'm sorry.

- Oh, asshole!

- I'm sorry, Tree.

- Wait,

you two know each other?

- Yeah, I...

- No.

We had a...

a class together last year.

Look, I was...

bringing you this back.

Sorry, I didn't know

where you lived, you know?

I...

Yeah.

I'm sorry again

about the... the mess.

What a douchebag.

Dr.

Lawrence to outpatient services.

Dr. Lawrence

to outpatient services.

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone ♪

♪ Yeah, it's my birth... ♪

Lori. Hi.

Hi.

Um... so, I thought

you only worked nights.

Doing a double for Jen.

She has the flu.

- That's nice of you.

- So, I guess I don't need to ask

what you're doing here.

Gotta go.

Look, Tree...

it's none of my business,

but... I think

something like this

is bound to have some

pretty serious consequences.

You're right.

It is none of your business.

Dr. Surd

and Dr. Margolan, 2476.

Dr. Surd

and Dr. Margolan, 2476.

We can't do this today...

there's too much

going on in the building.

I have patients.

And I'm losing mine.

Gregory?

- Hey.

- Hey, sweetie.

What's with the door?

Oh, stupid thing got jammed.

Oh, just wrapping up here.

Have you met my student, Teresa?

No. I haven't.

Hi. It's nice to meet you.

Thank you so much

for helping me out.

This is a nice surprise.

Nathan's been acting

really strange

since our big fight,

and this morning

he drove to Atlanta

for a last-minute

business meeting

- about opening a new gym.

- - Enter.

Which is weird, because

I've never heard anything

about it before.

But I'm trying

not to let that bring me down.

- Is that my top?

- How cute is it on me?

Whatever. Just don't get

anything on it, please.

You mean like

Nick's Nutter Butter?

Wow. How's he, Danielle?

What time you going

to the party tonight?

I don't know. Later.

Our tuition dollars at work.

Anyhoo...

don't be too late, or all the

cute Sigma boys will be taken.

Okay. Bye-ee.

- Bye-ee.

- Who took my hairdryer?

Crazy bitch.

Teresa, it's Dad.

I sat in that restaurant

waiting for you

for over an hour.

I can't believe

you would do this to me,

today of all days.

- Whoo!

- Oh, yeah!

How you feel, baby!

Hey, come on!

Okay, you guys are hilarious.

You can come out now.

Losers.

Yo, I think your friends

went the other way.

Can I help you?

Look, weirdo,

I'm not scared.

Why don't you go try this

with one of the heifers

at Delta Gamma?

They're into cosplay.

Okay, I'm calling the cops.

Shut up!

Oh, hey. You're up.

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday... ♪

Yeah, I wasn't sure if you,

you know, wanted

to sleep in or not, so...

Oh.

Right. Yeah.

I folded your pants...

for you last night,

and I wasn't sure if...

the material gets... wrinkled.

Uh...

I don't know if you remember

my name or not.

You know, you were...

pretty wasted last night.

But, uh...

- I'm... I'm...

- Carter.

You remembered.

- Uh, Tylenol?

- What?

Oh, my head is killing me...

do you have any Tylenol?

Oh, uh... yes.

Um...

It's over there.

Right.

It's under your clothes,

on... on the...

- Okay.

- Right. Right.

Ah, thanks.

And...

It's like

you've been here before.

Are you okay?

Tree?

Are you okay?

Dude, did you hit

that fine vagine or wha...

Ooh.

I'm... I'm sorry.

Nice one, dickhead.

Hey.

Stop global warming? I...

Um, sorry, no, thanks.

- Oh.

- Oh!

Come on!

♪ 64 bottles

of beer on the wall ♪

- Please! I'm soaked!

- ♪ 64 bottles of beer ♪

♪ You take one down, pass it

around, 63 bottles of beer ♪

♪ On the wall, 63 bottles of beer... ♪

- ♪ 63 bottles of beer ♪

- 26 hours, that's all you've got?

- Keep going!

- ♪ 62 bottles of beer on the wall ♪

- Faster!

- ♪ 62 bottles of beer on the wall ♪

♪ 62 bottles of beer ♪

- Keep going!

- ♪ You take one down ♪

- I can't hear you!

- ♪ Pass it around ♪

♪ 61 bottles of beer

on the wall... ♪

Hey.

You... haven't returned

any of my texts.

Tim, what day is it?

Uh... Monday the 18th.

You're sure?

I'm pretty sure.

I, um...

I gotta go.

Call me?

Oh, my God.

You sneaky little beyatch.

Who was it?

Sisters don't keep secrets.

- I'm totally having déjà vu right now.

- Oh.

I have it all the time.

It's supposed to mean, like,

someone's thinking about you

while they're masturbating.

I have it at least

five times a day.

Seriously, I've been having it

all day, it's so weird.

Maybe you should switch

to water next time, hon.

Uh, yeah, thanks.

I'll keep that in mind.

What are sisters for? Oh!

And don't forget,

house meeting at lunch.

Hello?

It's been on the board

since last Thursday, Tree.

Yeah, I remember. I...

Um...

She finally rolls in.

That's so weird.

You okay?

You were kind of a mess

last night.

Uh...

Oh, shit, I'm so late for class.

Did you really think you could

keep it a secret from me?

Don't you want to know

how I found out?

Driver's license?

Clever girl.

That picture, though?

I got to go.

But...

you-you didn't even

blow out the...

candle.

We really need

to step up our game

at these frat parties, okay?

And...

we still need to pick

this year's charity.

I can say right now

there's no way

we're doing the Special Needs

Art Fair again.

Get your school spirit on

before the big game.

Ten percent off

with your student ID.

T-shirts.

What's wrong, Tree?

Um, I'm just a little tired

I guess.

No, dumbass.

What's wrong with that?

So not Kappa cuisine.

And is that

chocolate milk I see?

I missed breakfast.

We all miss breakfast, Becky.

Becky.

Becky, look out.

I'm...

- so sorry. I'm sorry, Tree.

- Wait.

You two know each other?

- No.

- Yeah. I mean...

we had a...

a class together last year.

That's all.

I'm sorry about all this.

Hey.

What?

My bracelet.

Oh.

You know, I'm sorry again

about... you know, the mess.

What a douchebag.

Hey, we can't do this today.

There's too much going on

in the building.

I need to talk to you.

Tree, I...

I know what you're gonna say.

You do?

Look, it's normal

for a young girl to have

feelings for an older man,

but you can't fall in love.

I'm not falling in love

with you.

You're not?

No. I've been having

the weirdest day and... mmm.

Your wife.

Uh, that's kind of a buzzkill.

Gregory.

Are you in there?

Thank God you locked the door.

Hey, sweetie.

Uh, I didn't realize

I'd locked the door, um...

uh, just wrapping up here.

Have you met my student, Teresa?

No.

I haven't.

Nice to meet you.

♪ Happy birthday to us ♪

♪ Happy birthday to us. ♪

My favorite girls.

Blow it out.

There you go.

- Dad, what's up?

- You guys,

I think I just spotted a bug.

- Where? - Right there. See?

- Take a look. Mm-hmm.

- Mom...

- And Mom goes in for the kill!

- Oh, my God!

- Oh, no.

- Oh, no!

- Do you know...

Don't look at me.

Oh, I guess I'm

not having leftovers.

Last minute

business meeting about opening

- a new gym.

- I know.

I'm just borrowing it

for tonight.

What time you going

to the party?

To let that

bring me down, because...

Hello?

- Earth to space bitch.

- What?

What time

are you going to the party?

Uh, f... I don't know. Later.

Our tuition dollars at work.

Okay, whoa.

Chill out. It's just another

rolling blackout, sweetie.

- It happened before?

- Yeah.

Like, two weeks ago.

Anyhoo...

don't be too late

or all the cute Sigma boys

will be taken.

Who took my hairdryer?

Teresa, it's Dad.

I sat in that restaurant

waiting for you for over an...

Yo, Mike.

Come on, hurry up, man.

Hold up.

I'm coming.

Here we come!

No way.

Uh...

Surprise?

What the hell, Tree?

Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

I thought that you...

I am so, so sorry. I...

Don't mess with a Kappa bitch.

♪ Don't fail me now ♪

♪ Feet, don't fail me now ♪

♪ Don't fail me now ♪

♪ Feet, don't fail me now ♪

♪ Fresh suit, alligator shoes ♪

♪ Did you get the news

about me? ♪

- Are you serious?

- Yes.

That slut.

- Who?

- Lori.

She said she'd be here.

She's so out of the house

next year.

I think she said she had,

like, a double shift.

Whatevs. She's been boning

some mystery guy.

There's your stalker.

He's so hot.

- Danielle!

- What?

That is so gross.

Oh, okay.

♪ I'll get you dancin' ♪

Cheers?

Hi.

Why were you wearing

that stupid mask anyway?

The big game's on Friday,

I just thought I'd show

a little school spirit.

Never thought

I'd get clocked for it.

I really am sorry.

Did you ice it?

It's fine.

You can make it up to me later.

What?

Don't "what" me.

You know exactly

what you're doing, Tree.

What am I doing, Danielle?

Danielle.

♪ Now, now,

how am I gonna lose ♪

♪ I been movin' like this

since I was two ♪

♪ Down town

I'm fadin' into you... ♪

Nick?

Wow.

Je...

Oh, shit, Nick, you scared me.

You want me to punch you

in the face again?

Welcome...

to the Pleasure Dome.

It's a little loud,

don't you think?

Okay!

I'm officially over this.

Have fun in the Sahara Tent.

Come on, Nick, seriously,

Danielle's, like, freaking out.

Oh!

Help me!

Help me!

Oh...!

You asshole!

No!

What, is everything okay?

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone. ♪

What's...

I mean, I don't know if you

remember my name or not.

- You were...

- Pretty wasted?

Yeah.

Uh...

- And your name's Carter.

- Yeah.

And we've never met before.

I mean, no,

not until last night.

Oh, my God, this is a nightmare.

I'm sorry.

You were the one that

wanted to come home with me.

Dude, did you hit that fine vagi...

Nice one, dickhead.

Stop global warming?

A simple "no thanks" would do!

26 hours, that's all you got?

Keep going!

♪ 62 bottles of beer... ♪

I can't hear you!

Hey.

You okay?

You haven't returned

any of my texts.

She finally rolls in.

Hey, you okay?

Tree?

Tree, what's wrong?

Say something.

Lori, I...

I feel like I'm losing my mind.

I don't know

what's happening to me.

Okay.

Just calm down.

Tell me what's going on.

Look, I know this isn't gonna

make any sense,

but I have already lived

through this day.

Twice.

- Tree, I, um...

- No, no, no,

believe me; I know

it sounds totally crazy,

but this is happening to me,

I swear to God.

Tree, I'm sure it feels

like you're living through...

O-Okay, okay,

you made me a cupcake.

For my birthday, right?

You're about to give it to me

and then later on tonight,

there's a surprise party.

Who told you?

- Was it Becky?

- No, no, nobody told me.

That's what I mean.

Don't you see?

I know what is going to happen

before it happens.

- Just...

- Lori.

Lori, somebody's

gonna kill me tonight.

Oh.

Okay.

Okay, I get it.

Who put you up to this?

- Was it Danielle?

- No, no,

no, this isn't some stupid joke.

This is actually happening

to me.

I don't know

who's going to kill me,

but someone is, I just don't

know who it is yet.

- I...

- Tree, you're starting to freak me out.

Well, how do you think I feel?

Tree, look at me.

Nobody is trying to kill you.

- Yes, they are, Lori.

- Tree, look at me.

I know that today's hard

with your mom and all.

Why don't you skip class?

Just... take the day off

and get some rest.

I promise you,

you'll feel better tomorrow.

Okay?

Let's see you

get in here now, asshole.

Tree?

Why is the door locked?

Um, I-I just need

some alone time.

What time you going

to the party tonight?

I don't know.

Our tuition dollars at work.

Anyhoo...

don't be too late

or all the cute Sigma boys

will be taken.

Okay, see you soon.

Who took my hairdryer?

Opening a new gym.

Which is weird, because

I've never heard anything

about it before.

But I'm trying not

to let that bring me down,

because I'm on my way

to pick up Jace.

I'm just happy

you're gonna

see Jace this morning.

- I know.

- It's been, like, almost a month.

He's gonna be

so excited to see you.

Where'd Lori put

the frickin' remote?

- Hi, Jace!

- Hey, Jace!

Hey!

- Hi.

- Hi.

I'm Barbara.

- I am Crystal.

- Hi.

Nice to meet you.

- Can you say bye to Mamey?

- Bye.

Stay buckled and have a good time...

G-48!

Ain't that great!

- G-48!

- G-48!

I don't know what's going on

with you and that

other guy, okay?

Is being treated for a gunshot wound

following a deadly shootout

this morning

that left one officer dead.

Tombs was the subject of...

Do you go through

a can of hairspray

trying to get that full,

volumized look?

Then bump it up

with Bumpits...

and get that salon-style look,

flat to fabulous, instantly.

Imagine being able

to create today's hottest...

Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

Oh, my...

Aah! Aah!

What's wrong?

What's going on?

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta... ♪

- Ow.

- Tree? Are you okay? Are you sick?

- ♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

- Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

- ♪ And I ain't gotta... ♪

- Shut up!

Oh, my God, make it stop,

- make it stop, make it stop.

- Are you okay?

- Get away from me!

- All right.

Come on, just...

- Oh.

- Oh!

♪ Bottles of beer ♪

♪ You take one down,

pass it around ♪

- ♪ 61 bottles of beer on the wall ♪

- Louder!

♪ 61 bottles of beer

on the wall ♪

- ♪ You take one down, pass it around ♪

- I can't hear you!

I'm sorry.

You... forgot your stuff.

♪ You take one down,

pass it around ♪

- ♪ 60 bottles of beer on the wall... ♪

- Help me.

Will you please stop

staring at me

like I took a dump

on your mom's head?

I'm sorry.

I'm... just trying to...

wrap my brain around this.

How's that going for you?

Assuming that I believe any of

this is even remotely possible,

there has to be a reason

you're stuck in this day, okay?

Out of all the days

of your life,

what makes this day special?

What gives this day meaning?

- Nothing.

- ♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone. ♪

It's your birthday?

Yeah.

- Hello?

- So? Birthdays are just excuses

to, like, eat cake

and open presents and shit.

There's no real meaning

behind a birthday.

No, it's symbolic, okay?

Whoever's killing you

knows it's your birthday.

All right, look.

Give me a list of names

of everybody who knows

it's your birthday

and whoever's trying

to kill you.

Well, thanks to my sorority,

pretty much the entire school

knows it's my birthday.

They're throwing me this stupid

surprise party tonight.

I mean, it literally

could be anyone.

I mean, who has motive?

Okay, maybe it's Danielle.

- All right.

- Apparently, I made out with some guy she liked

right in front of her

last night.

Oh.

Oh. Must have been

before we met.

Busy night?

Okay, Mr. I'm Gonna Take

This Drunk Girl Home

and Take Advantage of Her,

don't judge.

For the record, I didn't take

advantage of you last night.

Okay? I slept on Ryan's bed.

So, w... we didn't...

- have s...

- No.

You were wasted last night.

And I was afraid

you were gonna fall

or choke on your own vomit,

like Janis Joplin.

Uh, wh... what were we...

- Suspects.

- Right, suspects.

Um, okay, so Danielle.

There's... Gregory.

Um, his wife.

Creepy Tim.

Oh. Um, that tiny girl from

T.J. Maxx that I got fired.

And maybe the Uber driver

that I spit on last week.

I think his name was...

What? Nobody's perfect.

Okay, this isn't helping.

This is pointless, isn't it?

All right, look,

the way I see it is-is...

you have unlimited amount

of lives,

so you have unlimited

opportunities to solve

- your own murder.

- So I'm just supposed to keep dying

until I figure out

who my killer is?

- That's your genius plan?

- Do you have a better idea?

♪ Are you ready? ♪

♪ Ha ♪

♪ It's time for me to take it ♪

♪ I'm the boss right now ♪

♪ Not gonna fake it ♪

♪ Not when you go down,

'cause this is my game ♪

♪ And you better come to play ♪

♪ I used to hold

my freak back ♪

- Yo, Tim! You coming out?

- ♪ Now I'm letting go ♪

♪ I make my own choice,

bitch, I run this show ♪

♪ So leave the lights on,

no, you can't make me ♪

♪ Behave ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ So you say ♪

♪ I'm complicated ♪

♪ That I must be ♪

♪ Outta my mind, but you've ♪

♪ Had me underrated ♪

♪ Rated, rated ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ha,

what's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong

with being confident? ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ha ♪

♪ What's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong with being,

what's wrong with being ♪

♪ Confident? ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ha ♪

♪ It's time

to get the chains out ♪

♪ Is your tongue tied up? ♪

♪ 'Cause this is my ground ♪

♪ And I'm dangerous ♪

♪ And you can get out,

but it's all ♪

♪ About me tonight ♪

Hey!

♪ So you say I'm complicated ♪

It's so exhausting.

Asshole!

♪ But you've ♪

♪ Had me underrated ♪

♪ Rated, rated ♪

- You bitch!

- Ow!

I knew it was you!

♪ What's wrong

with being confident? ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ha ♪

I'm gonna kill you!

♪ Ah, ah, ha ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ So you say ♪

♪ I'm complicated ♪

♪ But you've had me

underrated ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah,

what's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong

with being confident? ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ha,

what's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong with being ♪

♪ What's wrong

with being confident? ♪

- ♪ Yeah ♪

- ♪ Ah, ah, ha ♪

Oh, my God. Becky?

Becky.

Becky! Becky?

- Shut up!

- Ow.

♪ Yeah, it's my

birthday, and I ain't ♪

- ♪ Gotta pick up the phone... ♪

- Oh, hey. You're up.

Yeah, I wasn't sure if you

wanted to... sleep in or not.

Your plan totally sucks.

What?

I don't know if you remember

my name or not.

You know, you were...

pretty wasted last night.

Um... but I'm Carter.

Are you okay?

Never better.

- Are you sure you're okay?

- Yeah, I'm-I'm fine.

Dude, did you hit

that fine vagine or wha...

'Sup? Hey, um...

I'm sorry to bother

you guys, uh...

Uh... Carter?

Please? A little help? Carter?

Tree.

Hey, hey, hey. Calm down.

It's-it's just me.

How you doing?

What... what happened?

You... you collapsed

this morning.

What day is it?

Uh, it's Monday.

What's the date?

Uh, it's... the 18th.

Oh, we've been trying to get

in contact with your parents,

but for some reason...

- Geez!

- Can I help you?

Uh, I'm just...

- I'm checking on her.

- It's okay.

- He's a friend.

- Sorry. Visiting hours are over.

Got it.

Thanks, Carter.

Feel better.

When can I get out of here?

Uh, I'm having a hard time

pulling your medical records.

Why?

We just got these back

from imaging,

and these are signs of...

major trauma.

I mean, given the severity

of the scar tissue

and the size of the lesions...

This is gonna sound

crazy, but...

technically...

you should be dead.

Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

What are you doing?

- I need to get out of here.

- No way.

No, you need to stay here

for observation.

If I don't get out of here,

I'm gonna die.

- I need to go...

- Tree, Tree, shh, shh.

Listen to me.

You are absolutely safe here.

Okay.

I won't let anything

happen to you.

I'm really thirsty.

Could you get me a soda?

Sure.

Thank you.

Special delivery.

Keys, keys, keys.

Shit.

Oh, Gregory, where are

the car keys? Come on.

Tree, Tree, it's okay.

It's okay.

It's just me.

Gregory, look out!

No.

No!

Oh, my God. Come on.

Come on, no.

Oh...

No.

I did it.

I did it!

Yeah!

Catch me now, bitch!

What?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Come on!

No!

Oh, sh... shit!

Shit, shit, shit.

I know I was speeding, Officer.

- I just...

- Turn off the engine, please.

Yes, Officer.

License and registration.

I, um...

I don't have it.

Pardon me?

He's trying to kill me again.

- Again?

- Yes.

I mean, no, I me...

he was trying before,

but this time I got away.

But I-I-I didn't have time

to grab my clothes

and my driver's license

is in my pocket.

Ma'am, are you under

the influence of alcohol

or any other

controlled substance?

No!

That is what I'm trying to...

Wait.

If I am, does that mean that

you're going to arrest me

and lock me in a jail cell?

That's how it usually works.

I'm drunk.

You are?

Wasted.

And I'm high.

You know, pills, weed.

You name it, man, I'm on it.

Uh, well...

then I'm gonna put you

under arrest.

That's a good idea.

Let me help you.

Um, all right.

You know,

never been arrested before.

Uh-huh.

- Thank you!

- All units,

we got a 187

at University Hospital.

Suspect is believed...

No!

Shit. Oh, God, get me out!

Get me out, get me out!

What do you want?!

Why are you doing this to me?!

Who are you?

Show your face, you pussy!

Where are you going?!

Oh, shit!

Oh, fuck.

Oh, hey.

- You're up.

- Silence!

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone. ♪

Wait, you been here before?

Hey, uh, you know,

I don't think you should be

taking that many.

I mean, you could...

you could die.

If only it were that easy.

Water, por favor.

Come on.

- Here you go.

- Mm.

Ah.

Dude, did you hit that...

Hi.

I'm the so-called fine vagine.

And if that's the way

that you refer to girls,

you and your hand

are going to have

a very lasting relationship.

Have a nice day.

What?

I mean, are you...

you always this charming

in the morning?

Mm. Just this one.

So were you having a bad dream

or something?

Sorry?

You were just... screaming

- before you woke up.

- Oh.

Well...

I was dying.

Again.

What?

Uh, it's a long story.

Well, I mean,

I-I've got, you know, time.

I'm not doing anything today,

if-if you want to...

Seriously?

I hate this sticker.

Hey, wait!

Why are you following me?

I... I want to hear your story.

Look, no offense,

but the last time

I explained it to you,

it got me nowhere.

So...

"The last time"?

Hey.

So you're-you're having

bad dreams.

I took an elective course

on neurocognition

- in dream content.

- Mm. Hooray for you.

I'm just saying, I-I...

I might be able to help, you know?

Can you help me stop reliving

the same day over and over,

only to be murdered by someone

I may or may not know?

Yeah. Thought so.

- Stop global warming?

- Mm.

So, wait, you literally think

you're reliving the same day?

Yep.

And somebody kills you?

Yep again.

♪ ...bottles of beer ♪

All right, come on. You're

just messing with me, right?

Sprinklers.

Oh!

Car alarm.

Run!

Now, see that pledge over there,

the one in the baseball hat?

He's going to fall

right... now.

- Keep going!

- Hmm.

Any questions?

♪ ...bottles of beer

on the wall... ♪

How are your fries?

- Yeah, they're good.

- Mm.

Mm.

- That's... impressive.

- Mm.

That was nothing.

- Did you get it all out?

- Whatever.

You won't remember it anyway.

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone ♪

- It's your birthday?

- ♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ Can't you just leave... ♪

It's your dad. Do you want

to... want to get that?

I was never close with my dad.

Can't even remember

the last time he called me

on my birthday.

Kind of always forgets.

Yeah. I'm supposed

to be with mine.

I don't know.

I couldn't bear the thought

of sitting through another

uncomfortable celebration

while we both pretend

that everything is awesome.

Are you closer with your mom?

Was.

What happened?

Oh. She...

Yeah. Three years ago.

I'm sorry. That...

that-that sucks.

Yeah.

We actually share

the same birthday, though.

Seriously?

That's crazy.

Yeah, when I was a kid,

I always got to skip school.

We'd go to the beach.

My dad would buy us

this, like, huge birthday cake

and put just one candle on it.

We'd blow it out together.

I bet you miss her.

Yeah.

You know what's funny?

You relive the same day over

and over again,

you kind of start to see

who you really are.

If my mom saw me now,

you know, who I've become,

I don't think

she'd be very proud.

Don't say that.

It's true.

I'm not a good person, Carter.

Maybe this is karma.

Maybe I deserve it.

Well, look, I don't...

know you all that well,

but it's never too late

to change.

I mean, especially

if what you're saying is true.

Each new day is...

it's a chance

to be somebody better.

See, that's just it.

I don't think

I have that many chances left.

I keep on getting weaker

every time I come back.

You know, maybe I'm like

that cat with nine lives.

Eventually, I'm gonna run out.

Let's go live now to

Bayfield University Hospital,

where Jennifer Tran

has the latest

on this developing situation.

I'm standing outside the

Bayfield University Hospital,

where suspected murderer

John Tombs is being treated

for a gunshot wound,

following a...

Can you turn that up, please?

That left one officer dead.

Tombs was the subject of

a nationwide manhunt that ended

- after a five-month pursuit across four

- What's going on?

- State lines that left six female victims.

- Tree.

Authorities are still not sure

if Tombs is responsible

- for the murder of more than a dozen

- Oh, my God.

Other victims he's claimed

to have buried across

- the vast desert of Arizona...

- He's been here the whole time.

What? Tree!

Hey...

Tree!

He's going to escape!

Call the police!

- Who?

- John Tombs. Just call the police.

- What?!

- Wait, don't go in there!

Shit.

Excuse me, what are you doing?

He has a gun!

He has a gun, run!

Come on, come on.

Hey!

Carter!

Stop!

Stop it right now!

Hey!

No.

No.

Carter!

Ah!

No!

There's nowhere to hide,

little girl!

Ow...

Carter.

If I don't reset this day,

he's gone forever.

Should've killed me

when you had the chance.

Come on.

Olly, olly, oxen free.

Hey!

See you soon, asshole.

- ♪ It's my birthday... ♪

- - Oh.

Oh, hey. You're up.

Hey, I wasn't sure

if you wanted...

I can't believe

you tried to save my life!

Thank you so much!

Yeah.

Yeah, no biggie.

I just, you know,

brought you home.

Uh, I don't know if you

remember my name.

Carter.

Yeah.

You...

- I...

- Oh!

Do you mind if I borrow this?

Uh...

Yeah, yeah.

Sure.

See you at lunch.

Dude, did you hit

that fine vagine or what?

You naughty, naughty boy!

Fine vagine out!

What just happened?

♪ I've got my love stuck

in my throat ♪

♪ In my throat ♪

♪ I left my love

out in the cold ♪

- Hey. Stop global warming?

- Sure.

♪ I've got to give my love ♪

You save that planet, girl.

♪ I've got to give my love ♪

- ♪ To my soul ♪

- Yo!

Sprinklers are about to go off!

- Oh.

- ♪ My angel flew away ♪

You're welcome!

♪ I didn't know how

to keep her ♪

♪ Heaven knows

I needed her to stay ♪

I can't hear you!

♪ Take one down,

pass it around ♪

♪ 62 bottles of beer

on the wall... ♪

♪ To a song I couldn't sing ♪

♪ But if I saw her

on the street ♪

♪ I'd say, my baby ♪

♪ Fly back to me... ♪

Oh, Tim!

I know you're back there.

Hi, Tim.

- Hey.

- Hi.

Uh, you haven't returned

any of my texts.

Look, Tim, let's get real.

I know you don't like girls.

Stop trying to be

someone you're not.

Love is love, right?

Now you go out there

and get yourself

a fine piece of man ass.

♪ 'Cause I've got my love stuck

in my head ♪

♪ In my head ♪

♪ I've got to give my love ♪

♪ To my soul ♪

♪ And let go ♪

♪ Oh... ♪

Good morning.

♪ And let go. ♪

Oh, my God.

You sneaky little beyatch.

His name's Carter.

No, we did not have sex,

but if I finally make it

through this day somehow,

I'm gonna have his babies.

Lots to do; gotta go.

She finally rolls in.

What's wrong? Ugh...

Um, nothing.

No, it's...

Look, Lori,

I have been the worst roommate.

You've always been there for me,

but I've been way too selfish

to even appreciate it.

Can we start over?

I promise not to be

such a loser.

Are you high?

On life.

Oh! By the way,

I want to hear about

this mystery guy.

When extreme agitation occurs,

locomotive response

in the subject shows

- an acceleration...

- Dr. Butler.

Can I have a word, please?

What the hell do...

What the hell

do you think you're doing?

I'm ending this.

Wait, what?

I never should've

started seeing you.

It was wrong,

and I...

Anyway, I can't change

what I've done,

but I can start trying

to be a better person today.

What lame little self-help book

did you get that from?

You know what?

You have a wife

who loves you so much.

So if you can't

be faithful to her,

at least have the balls

to leave.

Don't expect me to let you

coast by in my class now.

Already dropped it.

I just have to say

how totally sad

and disappointing it is

when certain people

can't be bothered to make it

to a mandatory house meeting.

We were supposed to be picking

this year's charity.

Becky?

Is that chocolate milk I see?

I skipped breakfast...

Oh!

Mmm. Mmm.

Mmm!

Oh, my God! That is so good.

What's up with the fat fest?

We're Kappas.

Come on, hon, live a little.

Few calories won't kill ya.

No.

It'll just turn me

into a chunker.

Like Becky here.

Okay.

Oh, my God!

You'll be okay!

Hey, Tree?

Hey.

Just, uh, coming by to...

What was that for?

I have to run, but what are you

doing later tonight?

Nothing.

Do you want to take me out

for my birthday?

What's the punch line?

Look, I know it's really random,

but I promise I'll explain

everything tomorrow.

Assuming there is one.

Just say yes.

All right. Yeah.

Yeah.

Great.

Excuse me.

Can I pay for my coffee, please?

You're not gonna eat?

No, just the check, please.

I'll be right back.

Hi, Daddy. Sorry I'm late.

Like your tie.

Thanks.

How's school?

Fine.

Like your classes?

They're fine, Dad.

I don't want to do that anymore.

Do what?

Small talk.

It's just that...

this day...

this day is really...

hard for me.

And, um...

I miss Mom.

You know?

I miss her so much.

I miss the way that she smells.

I miss that crazy horse laugh

she has.

Yeah.

Me, too.

And I...

I guess I thought that if

I avoided all of it...

if I avoided you...

that somehow it would be easier.

But it's not.

It's been so much worse.

All of this running and hiding

has made me so miserable.

And I think

I finally figured it out.

For me, it took something,

like, totally crazy, but...

but I'm here.

And I love you.

And I am so, so sorry

that I hurt you.

Happy birthday, baby.

Stay calm.

I need you to stand up.

Slowly.

Slowly.

Okay, good.

Okay, this-this is

a really bad idea.

Okay, well, so is dying

for the 16th time.

Okay.

Now turn around.

I need you to listen to me.

He's going to escape.

We can talk about this.

Just put the gun down.

He's going to escape.

Go get help.

- Go!

- Okay.

I know you're not asleep.

Open your eyes.

Safety's on, little girl.

Ah, ah, what do we have here?

Hmm?

You know, real nice surprise,

you coming to visit me

like this.

Whew. I like you.

Damn shame.

But you're a feisty

little shit, ain't you?

That's right.

Crawl, little girl, crawl.

Or...

I'll just make this one

real quick for you, okay?

Hey!

Safety's off.

Thanks for the tip.

Who took my hairdryer?

So, this has got to be, like,

the strangest birthday

you've ever had, huh?

You have no idea.

Did you ever figure out

how Tombs got free?

No.

No one knows.

It's kind of like Houdini.

Yeah.

I guess.

What are you gonna wish for?

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow?

That's...

I mean,

isn't that kind of a given?

You want to aim

for anything higher?

No.

Tomorrow's good enough for me.

Shut up!

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

♪ And I ain't gotta

pick up the phone ♪

Oh, hey. You're up.

- ♪ It's my birthday... ♪

- Carter?

Yeah.

I'm surprised

you remember my name.

You were pretty wasted

last night.

This can't be happening.

This can't be happening.

- What?

- I killed him!

I stopped it!

Who?

What are you talking about?

What's going on?

I mean, look, you were probably

just having a bad dream

or something.

That happens to me all the time

when I'm drinking.

You know, I...

Nice one. Dickhead.

She finally rolls in.

Going somewhere?

Yes.

As far away as possible.

Tree, what's wrong?

Me. I was wrong.

I thought if I stopped running,

that I could beat it.

But it's never gonna stop!

Tree, you're freaking me out.

Oh, well!

That's me, a freak!

Tree...

Tree, look.

Happy birthday.

Thanks, but I already ate it

last night.

Oh, my God.

I died in my sleep.

What?

You killed me.

What?

You poisoned it.

But I never ate it before.

So you had to find another way.

Then Tombs fell

right into your lap.

Perfect scapegoat.

You had access to him.

Did you drug him first?

You knew that if he escaped,

everyone would assume

that he killed me.

But it was always you.

Tree, are...

is this a joke?

You think I would

actually try to poison you

with a freakin' cupcake?

Okay, then.

Prove it.

Go on, Lori.

Take a bite.

Go on, Lori.

You really are crazy.

Okay, then.

I'll take it down to the police.

I'm sure they can tell us

what your little

birthday treat is made of.

You stupid little whore.

I know I've been a bad roommate,

but isn't this a bit much?

What the hell?!

Oh, I don't know,

maybe because you wouldn't stop

sleeping with him.

What?

Gregory?

But he just kept choosing you.

Over me.

Guess all he wanted

was a cheap slut like you!

Wait.

You've been killing me

over some stupid guy?

Oh, that's not the only reason.

You're a dumb bitch, too!

But what I really want

to know is...

how did you figure it out?

Because you've killed me before.

Then I guess I'm just gonna

have to do it again.

Ow.

Ow! Ah!

No! Bitch!

No!

What the hell

is going on in there?

Nothing.

Tree just fell.

Everything's fine.

Whatever. Clumsy hoes.

I better see you

at the meeting today.

We'll be there.

Eat it, bitch!

What are you losers

doing in there?

Lori...

ate...

my cupcake.

I just knew there

was something wrong with Lori.

She never wore makeup,

never posted any cute selfies,

and she literally

owned a pair of Crocs.

All the signs

of a psycho killer were th...

Hello?

I'm trying to

get interviewed here.

Oh, my God, she is such a tool.

Anyhoo... Lori's little plot

was super lame.

Poisoning a cupcake?

Really?

We're Kappas.

We don't eat cupcakes.

- Is this local or national?

- ♪ It's my birthday ♪

- Local.

- ♪ And I ain't gotta... ♪

- Tree, honey, are you okay?

- Hey, Dad.

- Dad.

- Are you hurt?

Dad, no, Dad, I'm fine.

I promise.

- Are you sure?

- Yeah.

I'm just a little scratched up.

All right.

Okay.

I'll see you soon.

- I love you.

- I love you, too. Bye.

So, uh, now that your...

bedroom is officially

a crime scene and all,

uh, where you planning on

crashing tonight?

Is that an invitation?

You sure you want to wake up

in a dorm room again?

Only if it's yours.

Well, I mean, of course,

you'll have to

sleep in Ryan's bed.

- Of course.

- Yeah.

We can, yeah...

Oh, uh...

almost forgot.

You left this little guy.

Thanks.

You know what your little

scenario reminds me of?

What?

- Uh...

- What's that?

Groundhog Day.

The movie, Groundhog Day?

I don't know.

With Bill Murray?

Who's Bill Murray?

Are you kidding me?

Ghostbusters.

Sorry.

- I...

- How...

- I don't know.

- How do you sleep at night?

- You've never seen Groundhog Day?

- No.

♪ In walked old misery. ♪

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday ♪

- ♪ And I ain't gotta pick up the phone ♪

- Oh, hey.

You're up.

♪ Yeah, it's my birthday... ♪

I wasn't sure if you wanted to,

uh, you know,

sleep in or not.

Oh, my...

I'm kidding.

It was, it was me.

I just called your phone.

What?

It's Tuesday the 19th.

You made it.

Oh, my God.

You are such a jerk!

- I'm gonna kill you!

- Hey. That's not...

- What is wrong with you?

- H-Hey, hey. Hey.

That was not funny!

You are such a punk!

I hate you.

- She's back?

- Out.

I'm not sleeping

in my car again.

It smells like Hot Pockets

and feet.

Get out.

I just want clean underwear!

Yeah.

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Resynced by bozxphd. Enjoy The Flick.

♪ I was smoking

on a peace pipe ♪

♪ I've been wondering just what

would peace be like ♪

♪ I've been staring

into headlights ♪

♪ Swallow me whole ♪

♪ Finding my peace of mind ♪

♪ I'm just trying

to seize the moment ♪

♪ Trying to love

the little things ♪

♪ Even if they're

hard to love ♪

♪ A monument to love unspoken ♪

♪ Carved into stone,

"Unwilling to come undone" ♪

♪ It feels good to be running

from the devil ♪

♪ Another breath

and I'm up another level ♪

♪ It feels good to be up

above the clouds ♪

♪ It feels good for the

first time in a long time now ♪

♪ It feels good for the first

time in a long time with me ♪

♪ It feels good for the

first time in a while, too ♪

♪ Staring at the ceiling ♪

♪ Sending my love,

what a wonderful feeling ♪

♪ What comes next ♪

♪ I see a light ♪

♪ I'm along for the ride

as I'm taking flight. ♪