Hangin' with the Homeboys (1991) - full transcript
Two African-Americans and two Puerto-Ricans (though one pretends to be Italian) go out on the town on a Friday night. They will be forced to get to know each other, and even worst, learn to like each other as friends.
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Yo.
Man, what's up with that?
You know me? You talking to me?
Homey, you getting bad with me?
You want me to fuck you up?
- Fuck him up, man.
- Jump on him.
You couldn't fuck up
your own mother.
For that, motherfucker,
you die.
Come here, man.
Come here, man.
I'm hurting.
Get off the floor, man.
Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you for attending...
another performance
of Ghetto Theatre.
Return with us next week
as we perform our rendition...
of "Romeo and Latoya."
Thank you.
Did the mailman come?
Maria
to the front counter, please.
Maria to the front counter.
Johnny, Monday's the deadline...
on that Hispanic scholarship
I've been telling you about.
Yeah, right.
I forgot about that.
My son got his in
two weeks already...
so you better get moving.
Yeah, OK, I will.
OK.
Hey, how you doing, Daria?
Hi, Johnny.
How you doing?
I don't know.
I'm doing alright.
Haven't seen you in the store
in a long time.
Yeah. I've been feeling
kind of lazy.
You know?
Just not wanting to shop.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know that feeling.
Hey, I was wondering,
you know...
if you're not doing
anything tomorrow night...
would you like to go out
or something?
No, sorry. I've got plans.
Well, I'll be seeing you.
Alright, I'll be seeing you.
Maybe next week. OK?
Yeah, next week.
That sounds terrific.
OK. Bye.
Alright, bye.
God bless you.
I'll get her.
Look, Mr Stevens, we're fed up
with your behaviour.
We've sent you out
to several work programs...
and you never show up.
If you don't want your welfare
checks terminated...
you'd better straighten up.
This is because I'm black,
right?
What are you talking about?
You can be honest with me.
You're doing this to me
because I'm black, right?
Fine. I'll be honest.
I'm doing this because
I think you're a bum.
I'm a bum.
You calling me a bum
because I'm black, right?
If I was a white guy,
I'd be eccentric...
but now I got to be a bum?
No, if you were a white guy,
you'd be a white bum.
I don't think that's funny.
It wasn't meant to be.
I think you're not showing up
to our work programs...
because you don't want
to be involved in them...
which would simply lead to
a termination of your checks.
Oh, no.
Whatever gave you that idea?
I love your work programs.
Especially the one
you sent me on last week.
The one where I'm supposed
to clean the toilets.
I love that type of stuff.
I do that stuff
all the time at home.
That's what you'd expect
a black man to do, right?
This conversation is over.
I'm sending you
to one last program.
It's in Brooklyn.
Brooklyn? That's on
the other side of the world!
If you don't go,
your case will be terminated.
You're doing this
because I'm black, right?
We have several kinds of
magazines to choose from, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
By the way, sir,
what is your occupation?
We have several
kinds of magazines, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
May I ask
what your occupation is?
Oh, that's wonderful.
Yes, we have all kinds
of magazines, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
What is your occupation, sir?
You're an agent. Really?
You mean like in movies?
Well, my name
is Thomas McNeal...
and I'm an actor.
Yeah, really.
What have I done?
Well, did you see "Rain Man"?
I was up to play a part
of a waiter in "Rain Man"...
but they wrote out the scene.
Yeah, that happens sometimes.
Listen. Look, forget
about the magazines.
They suck.
Just take my word for it.
Do you think I could get
your name or address--
Yes, we have
excellent magazines, sir.
All sorts of magazines.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation, sir.
Hello.
Hey! Candy, how you doing?
Yeah. I'm fine.
No, I'm fine.
When, tonight?
I can't. I'm hanging out
with the fellas.
No.
When?
When did I promise that?
Come on, baby.
You can't count on anything
I say when I'm doing that.
Hello?
Hello.
Hey! Wendy, how you doing?
I'm OK. What?
No, I can't, not tonight.
I'm hanging out
with the fellas.
No. I know, Wendy, but--
When did I promise that?
It figures.
I'm sorry, Wendy, but I can't.
I told you--
But, Wendy, listen--
But, Wendy, but listen--
But, Wendy, but--
Alright, forget it.
So I lied, OK? So forget--
Oh, shit.
What the fuck happened to you?
Oh, shit!
Oh, shit!
Damn.
It's me, man.
Thank God.
I thought white people
moved in the neighbourhood.
Man, I'm a little short
on cash tonight.
I was hoping you could lend me
a couple of bucks.
Come on, man, a few dollars.
How much you owe me already?
I don't know. $20, $30.
$137.86.
Come on, man.
What do you care anyway?
You don't work for it.
You get it
from your girlfriends.
What difference does it make
where I get it from, man?
That's how much you owe me.
Look, you be honest with me.
You're doing this
because I'm black, right?
I'm doing this because
you're an ugly motherfucker.
Do me a favour,
could you get the door, please?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Please.
This is because I'm black.
Because I'm a black man
in a white land.
I'm answering doors for you.
Next thing you know...
I'll be driving motherfucking
Miss Daisy. What?
I'm looking for Vinny.
Who?
Vinny.
The guy who lives here.
Vinny?
You must be
talking about Fernando.
No, man, she means Vinny.
Come on in, baby.
How are you doing?
Good. I brought you dinner.
It's pork chops
with yellow rice.
I made it myself.
That's beautiful.
Baby, that's so nice.
That's so sweet.
I wish everybody
was so nice to me.
Come on in.
I wanted to ask you something,
sweetie.
If it's possible,
you think you could give me...
a couple of dollars tonight?
I'm running a little short.
I thought we were
staying in tonight.
Well, what happened was this.
You know, Willie's--Willie's...
Willie's father
ran into a little problem...
and he's really, really sick.
And so, all the fellas
are all gonna get together...
and go visit him.
Right, Willie?
- Huh?
- Right, Willie?
Oh, yeah. He's gonna die.
And if we don't visit him,
he's gonna die.
And death hurts.
You see,
Willie has been so taken...
he's so stunned
with what's been going on...
that he says crazy things
sometimes, right, Willie?
That's right, Fernan--Vinny.
See what I mean?
You're so sweet.
How much do you need?
Damn, man, what are you...
dumb, stupid, retarded,
or all of the above?
I didn't do anything.
You did enough, bro.
Do me a favour.
From now on, if ever
I ask you a question...
don't say anything, man.
Just nod, alright?
I was just trying to help you.
Don't help, bro.
If I need help from you,
I know I'm in big trouble.
- Do me a favour, just nod.
- OK, OK.
So cut the shit.
Where are we going, bro?
We're going to pick up Johnny.
Johnny? Johnny?
We just hung out with
that sad-sack motherfucker.
We're gonna hang out
with him again?
Johnny's my best friend.
I know that, man, but...
that guy gets so depressing
and shit, man.
He's like fucking
Mr Spock and shit.
Look, Johnny ain't going,
I ain't going.
That's my boy, alright?
That's cool, man.
Tell the guy to lighten up,
that's all.
OK, Fernando.
Do me a favour, man.
I can't believe
you're calling me Fernando.
From now on, do me a favour...
please, especially
in front of a woman...
you got to call me Vinny.
Do me a favour, man.
Promise me.
Call me Vinny, alright?
I'll call you Vinny Pantagalini
if you want me to.
If I hear one of you fuckers
call me Fernando...
I swear to God,
I'll die of a heart attack.
What's up, John?
Willie, how you doing, man?
What's up?
- Yo, man.
- Hey, Fernando.
It's Vinny.
My name's Vinny.
Yeah, right. Vinny.
I forgot. I'm sorry.
It's alright.
So, what are you guys
doing here tonight, man?
Yo, man, it's Friday night.
Time to have some fun.
Yeah. I don't know.
I feel kind of depressed
tonight, man.
You see that, man.
The guy's depressed.
You don't want to take a chance
on ruining the guy's state.
I'm serious and shit.
Can you do me a favour,
Vincente, and stay out of this?
- I'm talking to my friend.
- That's fine.
The only thing I'm saying is,
the guy's not feeling--
Maybe we should
just not twist his arm.
Could you do me a favour
and go over there?
I'm talking to my friend,
alright?
No, I'm gonna go.
I'm just saying...
That's it.
I'm not saying any more.
Don't worry about it, Willie.
Man, it's not gonna be
the same without you.
I don't know, man.
I gotta wake up early tomorrow.
I gotta open up the store.
I don't know.
If you're not gonna do it
for yourself, do it for me.
Please don't let me hang out
with that clown all night.
I don't know.
Oh, man, I don't know.
Alright, you got me.
I'll go check out.
Give me a minute.
- Alright.
- OK, man? You owe me.
He's not going, right?
He's going.
- He's gonna go?
- He's going.
Alright.
Pay attention to me, OK?
Do I have your attention?
You wanted him to come, right?
Understand what I just said?
You wanted him to come.
You. Nobody else.
The magic word is you.
Get to the point.
You wanted him to come.
You are responsible for him.
- What?
- That's right.
If I should have
a boring, depressing evening...
because of him,
you are responsible.
You. Nobody else.
You, alright? You.
You.
Jesus. I wear
this stupid outfit so much...
one morning it's going
to jump out of this locker...
and meet me at my front door.
Hello.
I know what
you're talking about, man.
I got five of these ugly suckers
myself at home.
Here's the scholarship form.
You better take it
because Monday's the deadline.
Ah, Pedro.
What?
I don't know, man.
I'm not the college type,
alright?
No, what type are you?
The supermarket type?
Don't be stupid.
You got a good shot at this.
You got excellent grades
in high school. You did.
I can't understand
how you wasted two years...
hanging around this joint.
Because I...
Man, I'll do it next year,
alright?
No. Next year
will be too late...
because you'll be too old
to qualify.
Take it.
What are you afraid of?
Take it.
Why Johnny, man? Why him?
Would you shut up?
Here he comes.
What's up, guys?
Where we going? Come on.
We're going to pick up Tommy.
OK. Let's go, Willie.
Vamanos, Fernando.
It's you. You.
Alright,
would you just shut up?
Did you call Tommy to let him
know you were coming?
Nah, man. I'm sure it's cool.
You can't go barging into
people's houses like that.
That's ridiculous, man.
That's not right.
Watch this.
Open up! It's the police.
Open up! I know you got
that 9-year-old girl in there.
Oh, man!
You big imitation
Italian motherfucker.
Come on in, y'all.
What y'all doing here?
It's Friday night.
Hang out night, man.
Y'all should call somebody
before you come to their house.
Why, man? What's up?
I made plans
with my lady for tonight.
See, I told you, man.
Come on, bro!
You don't want to hang out
with the fellas?
Y'all should call me.
You'd have called earlier,
maybe I could change my plans.
It's too late now.
I told you.
Didn't I tell you, guys?
You shouldn't be barging into
people's houses like that.
If he ain't going,
he ain't going. That's it.
What do you mean, "If he's
not going, he's not going"?
That's bullshit!
What's the matter?
It's like you said.
You shouldn't force somebody...
to do something
they don't want to do.
Twist their arm and all that.
This is different, OK?
Tommy's got to go.
Oh, yeah? Why?
Because Tommy's got something
that you and me and Willie...
ain't got all put together.
- What's that?
- Tom has a car!
Come on! We need you
and your second-hand cop car.
You got to come.
What's the matter with you?
There's my lady.
You gonna give up
a night on the town...
to hang out with some girl?
She ain't some girl, man.
She's an incredibly beautiful
and wonderful girl, alright?
This time,
I think it's really love.
Alright, man.
Come on, man!
When did Cupid shoot you
in your ass?
You gonna give up a night of
hangin' with your homeboys...
your bestest friends
for years and years...
just to hang out
with some ugly girl?
She ain't ugly, man.
She's incredibly beautiful.
Come on, man.
I know your taste in women.
She probably looks like a duck.
That's what you think.
This girl's so fine...
you be begging to drink
her bath water, motherfucker.
Right here, I got $10
that says your girl is ugly.
I'm talkin' "ug"-fucking-"ly".
- Can you back it up?
- Yeah, I'll back it up.
Who here's with me?
Come on! You guys know
Tommy's taste in women.
Alright, alright,
I got a $10 food stamp...
that says this girl's ugly
with a capital "Ug."
I got $10 right here
on that ugly person, man.
That's $30 I got to back up.
That's not fair.
You're the one
that says she's so fine.
Are you afraid she's ugly,
and you gonna lose?
I ain't afraid she's ugly, man.
I know the girl's fine.
People have different opinions
what fine is.
How we gonna handle this?
I got it, man.
Why don't we judge it like
a Miss America pageant?
We vote on
a scale of 1 to 10, bro.
Your girlfriend's
got to be at least a nine.
Nine? Come on, man.
Nine's too high.
If we vote,
she gotta be at least a five.
Five? My grandmother's a five,
and she's dead.
I don't care, man.
Nine is just too high.
She's gotta be at least a seven.
There you go, man.
Seven is cool.
I could do that.
How about you?
Fine.
You want to know what fine is?
I'll show you fine.
This girl is fine.
F-i-n-e. Fine.
That should be her last name.
Vanessa Fine.
And another thing, y'all,
don't be so obvious.
Don't be staring at her
like she's an eye chart...
'cause she's not only beautiful,
but she's smart...
and she'll pick up on that.
- Who is it?
- It's Tommy.
Hi, baby. How you doing?
Honey, what you doing?
How come you ain't dressed?
I thought
we was going out tonight.
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm really sick.
It just came over me
this morning.
How come you ain't call me?
I'm sorry.
I've been asleep all day.
I just forgot.
I guess that means
tonight is off.
Yeah. I'm really sorry.
OK. Alright,
I hope you feel better.
- Thanks, babe.
- OK.
Bye-bye.
She's beautiful, ain't she?
She looks like a duck.
Where's my money, man?
She's gorgeous.
Willie, tell him, man.
I give the ho a two.
Where do you keep your eyes?
In your ass?
That's how I feel.
Come on, man.
Y'all got to be fair now.
Cough up the dillies, bro.
Wait a second.
That's two for your side.
I think she's gorgeous.
That means Johnny here
has the deciding vote.
No, man. I don't want
to be deciding vote.
What are you afraid of, bro?
I'm not afraid, man.
I'm not afraid.
I didn't get a good look at her.
That's what happened.
He didn't get a good look,
so we're even.
Even?
Bring the girl back out, bro.
What? That's stupid.
I ain't bringing her back out.
Then I guess that means we won.
It's still
two against one, right?
$30 is $30.
Hi, sweetie.
What are you still doing here?
I was worried about you, baby.
You want me to get you
some aspirin from the store?
- What are you doing?
- Admiring your beautiful skin.
You know
I always liked your skin.
You're such a romantic.
I don't need anything.
I just need
to get back to sleep, OK?
OK. You go get
your beauty rest, darlin'.
- OK.
- Alright.
- Bye, lover.
- Bye-bye.
Oh, no, guys. No, no.
I don't want to be
the deciding vote, OK?
Just be honest.
Alright. OK? Alright.
She was sort of like...
I don't know. She was...
'Cause she had...
You know...Hell, man...
She was an eight.
- Alright! An eight!
- Damn!
Make out all checks to
Mr Thomas McNeal. Thank you.
You told me to be honest, man.
You was honest, Johnny.
Actually, you weren't.
She's really a nine.
You know who's responsible
for this, right?
You're responsible for this.
Where's the first stop, y'all?
Wherever the girlies are, bro.
You're crazy, Vinny, man.
You keep messing with
them girls like that...
and one day, you'll come down
with something strange.
Nah, not me.
Let me show you something, man.
You see this here?
Do you know what this is?
- What?
- What is this?
- What is this?
- I know what it is.
- What is this?
- I know.
- What is this?
- It's a condom, man.
Wrong. It's a super-condom.
This thing has an ingredient
in it called Nonoxynol-9.
You hear what I said?
Nonoxynol-9.
Alright. With that,
no matter who you're with...
no matter what they got,
with this...
knock that shit right out.
You can fuck an elephant
with this condom.
I'm sure you have, Vinny.
Oh, man, please.
Don't bring your girlfriend
into the conversation.
Johnny, I didn't know
you liked fat women.
Oh, shit! Look at that.
The perfect opportunity for me
to use my super-condom, man.
Slow the car down, man.
Yo, yo, yo! Yo, baby!
Yo, Vinny! Get your ass
out of my face, man.
What's your name, man?
My name is Vinny.
I'm from Italy.
I'm trying to drive here.
Get your hairy,
pimply anus in here, man.
Damn. This is hazardous
to my driving, man.
Come on, baby,
why don't you come for a ride?
What are you doing, man?
You trying to pick up
my daughters?
Oh, shit.
Shit, man.
Let's get the fuck out of here.
You don't pick up my daughters!
You're a puto!
I'll kill you, man!
Come on, Tommy.
Move the car, man!
Oh, shit!
Look, man,
if them bottles hit my car...
I'd get out
and kick your ass, man.
It wasn't my fault.
It was your fault.
You're the one who made...
that crazy Puerto Rican
come over here.
Hey, hey, hey. Come on.
Watch it with that
"crazy Puerto Rican" stuff.
Don't say stuff about my people.
What stuff? I just said
"crazy Puerto Rican."
You said it again.
I told you not to say it, man.
Don't talk about
my people like that.
Yo, Vinny, man.
Did you hear the way
he's talking about our people?
Yo, Vinny, man.
Don't you care?
Man, what am I supposed
to say to that shit?
Come on, man. Say anything.
You don't even think
you're Puerto Rican, do you?
Yo, he's Italian.
No, man.
I can't believe you said that.
It's not true, man.
I don't think I'm Italian.
Any more brews back there?
No, Tommy, you had the last one.
Damn. We got to stop.
I'm going to get some more.
Yo, Johnny,
put another dollar in, man.
- Here's my two.
- Thanks.
Hey, man.
You ain't got nothing?
You can't put in 50 cents?
Damn, Willie, you're pitiful.
Come on, put me down.
I'll put you down, man.
You're an ugly motherfucker.
How's that?
Shit, man. I'm sorry.
Don't worry about it.
We all got your way.
No, no, no,
don't count me in that.
No more, man. I've had it.
Come on, Vinny.
Willie would do it for you.
That's the point, man.
That boy never has any money,
and I'm tired of it.
That's a black thing, you see?
The white man oppressing me,
keeping me down.
What is this, man?
The Gettysburg Address?
Forget it.
I'll put in the difference.
I just want some brew.
You're being brainwashed
by the white man...
into thinking that
all minorities got to be poor.
Willie, please shut the fuck up.
Boy's always got to be
coming up with something.
"Put me down."
White man, black man.
Shit.
Do yourself a favour, man.
Get a job.
Stop bothering people.
Do you have a job, Vinny?
Yeah!
We're talking about him, not me.
I know, man. Do you have a job?
There it is.
Ain't none of your business
if I got a job or not.
That's because
you don't have a job, man.
It's because all the money
you've gotten...
and all the food
you've ever gotten...
everything you've ever gotten
in your life...
you've gotten
from poor innocent women.
That's why, man.
You're a leech and a parasite.
You know who's responsible
for this, right?
Look at me.
You know
who's responsible for this?
Yo! Let's hit the road.
Yo, man. That looks like
Louie-Louie over there.
Oh, shit. That's him.
Louie!
- Lou-Lou.
- He's dope.
What's up, man?
What's up?
What's going on, man?
What you doing around here?
Just chillin', workin'.
Doing the same old.
Tell me something, any parties?
Anything going out tonight?
Not in the boogie down
Bronx, homeboy.
Bronx is dead.
But y'all should
check out Manny-hatty.
Yeah? Manhattan's
what's happening tonight?
I don't feel like going
to Manhattan tonight.
Manhattan is where it's at.
That's why I won't even be
hangin' in the Bronx, chief.
Manhattan is the life, B.
Let's just hang out
in the Bronx tonight, alright?
Whatever, home piece.
I got to tip.
Take care, man.
Lou-Lou is bad, bro.
He's dope and all that.
That boy's got dollars
on his dollars.
Alright.
Here we go all around.
One for Johnny.
Can I check your ID, please?
One for Willie...
who didn't put in
a fucking dime as usual.
- And one for Tommy here.
- Thank you, brother.
Excuse me, Tommy.
How many beers did you have?
I don't know. Two or three.
Two or three, man?
You shouldn't have another beer
if you're driving. I'm sorry.
Please, man.
Give me that goddamn--
I'm serious. You can't be
drinking and driving.
Man, you're going to
be drinking and walking...
if you don't give me
that fucking beer.
Come on, man.
We got six of them here.
- Don't give it to him.
- Get the fuck out of here.
What's the matter with you?
Grow up, Johnny, man.
- Acting like a little kid.
- You are.
I don't know
what you're afraid of, man.
What the fuck
are you afraid of?
Oh, shit. Look at that.
Louie-Louie said there ain't
nothing happening in the Bronx.
Oh, my God!
Make sure there ain't no big,
fat, hairy motherfuckers...
with beer bottles
out there, man.
Whoo! Baby! Whoo!
- Pull the car over.
- Chill out, man. Shit.
Come here!
Mama!
Come on, man. Pull over.
The last motherfucker
was throwing shit at my car.
- Just calm down.
- Pull over, man.
Why the fuck are you talking
to little girls, man?
- Pull over.
- I'm pulling over.
You're an asshole, man.
Damn!
Come on out here, Tommy.
Where'd them women go, man?
You hear that?
Where's that coming from, man?
Where's that music coming from?
Look right there. The window.
Shit. There's a party
up there. Let's go.
No, man.
Nobody knows you up there.
I'll just knock on the door
and say, "Jose sent us."
Jose? You don't know
no Jose, Vinny, man.
It's a Puerto Rican party.
There's got to be
one Jose up there, right?
Vinny, man,
it's not going to work.
Damn! Quiet.
What's the matter with you?
It's coming from over there.
It's right here.
It's not going to work, man.
Stop it, will you?
This is going to work.
Let me do the talking.
I'll get us in.
Act natural.
How you doing?
Can I help you?
Jose sent us.
Yeah, well, OK. Come in.
Thank you.
Man, I hate house parties.
I always feel like
I'm locked in a closet.
You're the last guy
who should say anything...
'cause you ain't got no money.
You got in here for free,
so shut the fuck up.
Where's the food?
You can get some food, man.
I'm going to get me a woman.
Damn, I love Latin music.
Yeah, Tommy?
I didn't know that, man.
Great. Why don't
you go ahead and dance?
I love the music,
but I could never dance to it.
Sure you could, man.
It's real easy.
Anybody can dance.
Here, I'll show you.
Watch this.
Nah. That's OK.
Come on. Try it, man.
No, man, I'm afraid to.
- Why, man?
- Because that's how it starts.
That's how what starts?
You know, Johnny.
That's how it starts.
No, I don't know, man.
How what starts?
It starts with the dancing, man.
Next thing you know, I'll be
wearing polyester suits...
with bell-bottom pants,
eating rice and beans.
It's alright.
Tommy, I take that as
a racist statement, man.
That ain't no racist statement.
It's just a fact. I don't
look good in bell-bottoms.
Hi, baby, come here.
You're very, very attractive.
I just want
to tell you something.
Come here for a second.
Ugly bitch.
Who invited you here, man?
Jose.
Jose?
Jose.
Which Jose? Point him out.
He's probably not here.
He's late or something.
What's his last name, this Jose?
That's it, Tommy.
You're getting it, man.
Oh, my God, man.
I feel my pants expanding
at the bottom already.
Cut the shit, man,
and just keep dancing.
Am I rocking it?
Yeah, you're rocking it, man.
Just keep it loose.
Keep it flowing.
You're pretty good at this, man.
You should get
on that dance floor...
and find you
one of those hot Spanish mamas.
You might find
your future wife tonight.
Not me, man.
I'm not going to go that far.
I've already got my mind
on a special girl.
Yeah? Who is he?
Tommy, this girl,
she's innocent and virginal.
This the same girl you've been
talking about for weeks?
You still
ain't got that booty yet?
This girl's not about booty.
She's a shy and sensitive thing.
She's innocent, virginal,
shy, and sensitive.
I don't know about you,
but she sounds like a drag.
Yeah, so after
I finished law school...
I decided I didn't want
to devote my life to one thing.
So I was trying to find
something in my life...
that I could do
on those dull spaces...
like on the weekends
and on holidays.
That's when I decided
to become an astronaut.
Mendez. It was Mendez.
No, no, it wasn't Mendez.
It wasn't Mendez. It was...
Perez. Perez?
No, it wasn't Perez.
Couldn't have been Perez.
Vasquez. Jose Vasquez.
You know what I think, bro?
I think you're
full of shit, black boy.
Is that what you think I am?
I'm not black. I'm Dominican.
You're a Dominican?
Get the fuck out of here!
Let's go!
Nobody invited you!
You guys come back here again,
I'm going to get my gun.
Fucking pendejo.
Goddamn! What the fuck's
the matter with you guys?
What the hell did you guys do?
- What?
- Who?
What? Who?
Come on, you guys know.
You must have done something
to get our asses kicked out.
You want to know
what the fuck I did?
I was born black, motherfucker!
That's what I did!
Stop with that black shit.
They threw me out of that party
because I was black!
Hold up, man.
They said that to you in there?
That's right.
That's your people for you.
Wait a second, Willie.
I was in that party, man.
I was in there,
fighting for you.
You going to say that shit now?
That wasn't right, man.
I didn't do shit.
Yo, Willie.
Are you OK, man?
Yeah, man.
Y'all just stop thinking
about it, man.
Those guys were assholes,
alright?
Wait a second.
Where you going?
I'm driving into Manhattan.
Louie-Louie was right.
The Bronx is wack tonight.
When you get to Harlem,
let me out.
What you got against Manhattan?
I wait all week
to hang out with you guys.
I'm usually
in my damn, funky apartment...
sitting there doing nothing,
bored to death.
I die for these Fridays.
I want to hang out
with my homeboys...
not some white people
from Manhattan.
I'm driving into Manhattan
and that's that, man...
so just grow up
and deal with it.
Alright! Manhattan!
Let's get some rich white women.
That's what you need,
a white woman.
That'll make you feel
just great, won't it?
Yo, fellas.
See that building right there?
I auditioned for a part
in a TV movie there last week.
Seriously, Tommy?
What happened, man?
They loved me, man.
I was the best thing that
they've seen in a long time.
- They told you that?
- When I was in college...
I was the best actor
in my acting class.
They all looked up to me
like I was William Shatner.
College? Tommy, I didn't know
you went to college.
Yeah, I went to college.
I got a degree, man.
Did you like it?
To tell you the truth,
it sucked.
It's like a big stall, you know?
Big nothing.
I'll tell you, man,
I agree with Tommy.
I went to college.
What? You?
You went to college?
What? Hey, man.
I'm a college man.
What? I'm serious, man.
And I'll tell you something.
It was the most miserable,
frustrating...
humiliating two weeks
of my life. Yeah.
Yo, Tommy, man...
if somebody came up to you
and said...
"I'm interested
in going to college"...
and all that,
blah, blah, blah...
what would you tell him?
I'd tell them
not to waste their time, man.
You go to school for four years,
get that stupid degree...
then you get out
and get the same lousy jobs...
for the same lousy pay, man.
It ain't worth it, man.
Yeah.
I see what you're saying.
Look where we're at!
Yeah! Manny-hanny!
This is the life! Yes!
Come on in. It ain't no sin.
You got a quarter?
Yeah, I got a quarter.
You got a quarter?
Yeah, I got a quarter.
Man, watch it!
Damn, they got a little TV.
That's cool, man.
Shut the fuck up.
Put the quarter in.
Cool it, man.
Watch your leg.
I'm trying to get
the quarter in, alright?
Somebody's rubbing against me.
I don't like that shit.
You want to borrow my
super-condom with Nonoxynol-9?
That shit ain't funny, man.
Hey, man! Watch it!
Great, man. Just great, Tommy.
What happened?
Tommy knocked the quarter
out of my hand.
It's lying there
right by his foot.
Why don't you bend down
and pick up the quarter?
Yo, man, fuck you.
Come on, man.
I ain't bending down
in this fucking place.
You're crazy.
I'll get it, man.
I can reach it.
- Oh, man!
- Whoa! Take it easy!
Watch your hand, man!
This is stupid, man!
Everybody out
of the fucking booth!
Get out of the fucking booth.
Come on. Let's go.
Out of the fucking booth.
Johnny?
Johnny, did you
get the quarter, man?
- I got the quarter.
- Good.
Let's go.
In the fucking booth.
You in yet, man?
Lock the door.
Put it in.
- Shit!
- That's bad!
Wish those men would move
so I could see these women!
That girl looks familiar.
Damn. She's working it.
Wait a minute!
What a gyp! Gyp!
Come on. What the fuck?
We'll get another quarter.
What's the matter?
Yo, Johnny.
Yo, man, what's up?
Damn, man. I knew that boy
was scared of pussy...
but this is ridiculous.
You want to talk about it?
Whatever it is,
it can't be that bad.
What happened?
Did Vinny fart in the booth?
That's funny.
I'll tell you what happened.
The boy saw a pussy
and went into stitches.
He ain't never
going to recover, either.
Come on, Vinny.
Everybody's seen a pussy
by the time they're 18.
Nah, man. I'm serious.
There's a lot of
real late bloomers out there.
Watch this.
Hey, Johnny.
Which way do a pussy go, man?
Like this or like this?
What are you afraid of?
Fucking asshole!
You could've got us killed!
Fuck!
Shit.
Man. Fuck.
Fuck!
You really fucked it up
this time, man.
Fuck you, Vinny, alright?
Fuck you!
Find a phone
so I can call a towing place.
You see that, huh?
He's gonna start
with that depression shit.
I give him five minutes
before he starts talking...
about people starving
in China and shit. Watch.
Would you leave him alone?
Watch.
You alright, man?
He's a fucking asshole, man!
He could've got us
all fucking killed, man!
Alright, man. Take it easy.
It's OK. We're all alive.
It's cool.
I just feel stupid.
I'm just over here caught up
in my own problems...
when, hell, there's people
in China who are starving.
I'm over here
feeling sorry for myself.
Willie, tell me, man.
Did you ever know somebody
that you thought...
was better than
the rest of the world...
you know, different...
then you came to find out
that they're not...
that they're actually
even worse?
Who you talking about?
Fernando?
Hey, Vinny, man.
It's Vinny, alright?
Come on!
Alright, alright.
We got it, we got it.
Now would you
shut the fuck up?
I'm not worried
about that clown.
I'm talking about a girl...
a girl that I was once
really crazy about.
That's what I'm talking about.
What made you think of her?
'Cause I saw her tonight.
She was in that X-rated movie
we saw at the peep show.
Was that the innocent
and virginal girl...
you've been telling us
about for weeks?
Yeah. That's her. That's Daria.
What made you think
she was innocent and virginal?
I don't know. What do you mean?
What are you talking about?
Did she come tell you
she was innocent and virginal?
No, man. Come on.
Who's gonna come up to you
and say shit like that?
That's what I'm trying to say.
You can't hate this girl...
'cause she's not
what you want her to be.
Yeah, but you don't
understand, man.
The way she was acting,
I just thought she was--
Yeah, but that's
what you're thinking.
You can't blame her
for what you're thinking.
Stop trying to turn this girl
into something she's not.
She's probably
still a good person.
I mean, if I was a girl
and I hated working...
I could see myself
up on that screen...
you know, naked, shaking my ass.
Fuck that. You make a lot
of money doing that shit.
Sure beats cleaning toilets.
You're crazy, man.
You're crazy.
Come on.
Tommy.
This is gonna
cost me a fortune, man.
I know it.
Alright.
So who's Thomas McNeal?
Right here.
Here you go.
We're open 24 hours.
You call me later,
I'll give you an estimate.
Alright.
So where are the keys?
- I left them in the ignition.
- Alright.
So what's the move?
We're going to the subway
or what?
Hey! Pay the fare!
You over there!
The fare ain't fair, Uncle Tom!
Help me! Help me!
Help me! Help me! Help me!
OK, fellas,
let's see some I.D.
What a night.
Is there something funny?
You guys, cut it out!
You find this amusing?
Thomas McNeal.
Yeah.
What's your profession?
I'm an actor.
Can't you tell?
He's acting like he's terrified.
Yo, Vinny, man.
Stop that shit. Damn!
I have in my hand an I.D. card
with your picture on it...
but it says Fernando Cuevas.
So?
So your friend over here
just called you Vinny.
So that's a nickname,
that's all.
What's your nationality?
I'm Puerto Rican, man.
Oh, my God!
I can't believe it!
I never thought I'd live
to hear you say that.
Why your friends call you Vinny?
It's a nickname, that's all.
From Fernando to Vinny?
Why isn't it something
like Furman or fur ball?
It's Vinny, that's all.
Is he telling the truth?
I ain't say nothin'.
I don't know nothin'.
I asked you a question!
Why do you call him Vinny
if his name is Fernando?
He thinks he's Italian.
Thinks he's Italian?
So, you think you're Italian?
Let me tell you something.
I'm Italian, OK?
You see that name? Saninelli?
I'm Italian...
and I'm gonna tell you
something.
No matter what you do,
no matter what you say...
you will never be Italian.
Scum like you could never be
in the same company as me.
Now I'm gonna write you
a summons.
I got to tell you.
It's so easy
to be a tough guy...
when you got a gun on one side
and a badge on the other.
But I'm gonna tell you
something, and I mean this.
They're nothing
but a bunch of punks to me.
I tell you what.
They're nothing
but a bunch of thugs...
with a license, and I hate 'em.
I swear to God, I hate cops.
I fucking hate cops.
Me, too.
Could you pass me the ketchup
there, Fernando Cuevas?
You think you're funny?
You penniless motherfucker.
Come on, y'all.
Let's leave fur ball alone.
You gonna gang up on me
and shit?
Anybody want to donate
to the United Negro--
Would you mind--
Don't encourage him.
The guy needs some money.
What'd I tell you about
letting your father out?
Please. Let's go.
I just wanted something to eat.
See that there?
That there is your future.
What?
That's right. You keep up with
that putting me down thing...
and then your white man,
black man thing...
and they oppress me.
You keep that up, that's exactly
the way you're gonna wind up.
You think that shit's funny?
Come on.
He's just goofing on you
'cause you goofed on him.
I can't laugh that shit off.
You think that shit is funny?
You think I like being this way?
You think I like being scared...
not knowing if I'm gonna make it
through the week?
That's not funny.
Don't play like that.
What is it with you?
What is it? Huh?
What?
What? What is it with you?
You feel like
there's this beam of light...
that shines on you from God,
and then the rest of us...
we're all just fucked up?
Is that what you feel?
I feel that way sometimes.
You're an asshole.
Your mother's an asshole.
You're the fucking asshole.
Your whole family's
a fucking asshole!
Menu?
No, thanks. Two coffees.
I'm so tired.
I've been working all day.
I know. I'm so glad it's over.
We should go play pool.
I love watching you play.
You're really good at it.
I just like to show off.
That's why.
Hey, how you doing?
So, being that...
you're the most beautiful woman
sitting at this table...
you know what
I'm gonna do for you?
I'm gonna devote all my time
and attention just to you.
Hey, hey.
Now that I got rid of her,
you and I can talk...
because you're the one
I was really eyeing anyway.
No, thanks.
I have herpes.
Wait!
Nonoxynol-9...
knock that shit right out.
He a friend of yours?
Not really.
That's good to know,
'cause he's a real asshole.
You know what?
I just tried telling him that
a few minutes ago...
but he wouldn't believe me.
I guess we think alike.
Maybe...
or just maybe the whole world
thinks he's an asshole.
What's your name?
- What?
- Do you have a name?
My name is Johnny.
I'm Luna.
It's nice to meet you.
You look kind of familiar to me.
Haven't I seen you
in here before?
I doubt that.
Didn't I see you come in here
once with your girlfriend?
I doubt that, too.
So you don't have a girlfriend.
No, not really.
Look...
Lila and I are gonna go
shoot some pool down the street.
Want to come?
I gotta ask my friends--
just talk to my friends.
Look, Johnny...
I don't want to marry you.
I just want to play pool
with you.
Come on.
So, tell me your life story,
Johnny.
You want to know my life story?
My life story.
There's actually not much
to tell at all, actually.
Do you like girls?
I like girls.
I like girls a lot.
I like girls.
Why do you got to ask that for?
It's a start.
You're really good at this.
I didn't invite you to play
so you could watch me lose.
I paid for half
my college tuition...
by beating the pants off guys
who thought they were hot shit.
I see. You're a college girl.
That's right.
I know a lot of people
who said that college...
really isn't all
that it's hyped up to be.
They even actually said it's
a big waste of time--serious.
What idiots told you that?
Well...
those idiots over there.
You know you're
perpetrating a fraud, right?
Excuse me?
You're perpetrating a fraud.
You are what I call a sad excuse
for a fine African sister.
And what's that
supposed to mean?
What I mean is you're dressing
like a white girl...
you're hanging out
with this white girl...
and you even smell
like a white person.
You trying to call me
an Uncle Tom?
I'm calling you Aunt Tomini.
You got a lot of balls.
You're saying that
'cause I'm black, right?
If I was a white guy,
I'd be speaking my mind.
Because I'm black,
got to have big balls.
I want you to realise...
that there's something
very, very strange...
going on here tonight--
something very strange.
Fucking telling me.
Look at the situation.
Out of this whole damn
stuck-up place...
you got two girls
who could speak English.
One of them
is talking to Johnny...
and the other one's
talking to Willie.
There's something strange
going on here.
Fuck these people.
Where are you from?
All over.
I'm an army brat.
My dad was in the service,
so we travelled around a lot.
Where?
Germany, France...
Hawaii.
Wow!
That's great.
Teaches you there's this big
beautiful world out there...
just waiting for you
to take a bite out of it.
You know what I mean?
No, I don't know.
Tell me.
You got a lot of nerve
coming up to me...
someone you don't even know,
pointing your damn finger...
and you ain't done shit to help
yourself and nobody else.
Wait a minute!
Have you gone
to any demonstrations?
- No, but--
- Have you signed any petitions?
I didn't have a pen,
so I didn't--
Have you even bothered
to get off your lazy ass...
and join any organisations?
Never did. But--
Tell me. Do you vote?
No. I missed this year
'cause Dinkins wasn't running.
I'll catch--
And you're gonna tell me
I'm perpetrating a fraud?
You're the one
that's perpetrating a fraud.
I know what this place needs,
a jammie.
Do a jammie?
Right here?
- Right now?
- Yeah.
As usual, I'm winning.
Must feel great to always win.
Yeah, it feels great.
I need something like that.
I need something that
every time I did it, I won.
You know what I think?
I think everybody's got that.
You just got to open up
and allow yourself to find it.
Go ahead.
What are you afraid of?
You fucked my wife!
You son of a bitch!
You fucked my wife.
How dare you speak to me
in such an outrageous--
Don't fucking point at me!
Come on, you motherfucker!
- Come on. Come on!
- You bastard!
What is going on?
Let's go out for a little bit.
What?
Get the fuck out of here!
What? What?
That's the guy!
He fucked your wife!
I was there!
And when he was done,
I fucked her.
Well, I guess I'll have
to give you my number...
or else
we'll never finish the game.
You would've won anyway.
You were just very good at it.
Never know.
Your luck might change.
Here.
Why don't we...be friends?
How's that sound?
Sounds nice.
Sounds very, very nice.
Please make sure
you call the right number.
Oh, yeah.
I won't call the wrong number,
I promise you.
I will never forgive you
for leaving me in there...
with those idiots--never!
I'm sorry!
There's no excuse for this--
none.
Hey, hey...
did you ever figure out
where you saw me before?
Huh?
Remember you said
that I looked familiar to you?
What am I? A piece of gum?
I've never seen you before.
See, forget it. Now you still...
Lala, come on! Don't go home.
Oh, shit!
Did you see me in there?
I was brilliant, man.
Excellent.
What? You sucked. What was all
that Shakespeare shit?
All that wither, hither,
yonder bullshit?
You sucked!
You wouldn't know the difference
between a good or bad actor.
But I know the difference
between a bad actor...
and an actor that sucked.
Hey, Johnny...
what happened with that chick?
She's gonna be my friend.
She gonna be a what?
She's gonna be my friend.
Get out of here!
Friend?
Fucking...
You see, a good actor
reacts to a situation.
Did you see my eyes
when we were in there?
The way they kind of twitched
around when I was in the moment?
Your actin' sucks.
Your shit is fake.
Fuck you. Your mama's fake.
I almost had a part
in "Rain Man."
Did you almost have a part
in "Rain Man?" No.
I almost played a waiter
in "Rain Man."
By now I'd be famous.
People'd be stoppin' me
in the streets going...
"Oh, shit.
Ain't that the brother...
who played the waiter
in 'Rain Man'?"
Vanessa.
Vanessa!
Yo, relax. Be cool.
- Tommy!
- Don't do it!
Be mature about it, man.
Tommy?
Yo, who the hell
is this guy, baby?
Baby? Baby?
Tommy, stop it!
You're supposed to be sick.
You look really sick.
Yo, what is it?
Just leave her alone, alright?
I'm alright.
Y'all can let me go.
Vanessa...
Can we go somewhere
and talk about this?
Look, let me have a minute
with him.
You know this guy?
Yeah.
If there's something going on,
why don't you just tell me?
Come on, please?
Just let me talk to him.
Go ahead.
If you want me,
I'll be on the corner.
Vanessa, I just--
I mean, I don't understand.
I come out...
Guys, me and Vanessa
would like to talk.
Absolutely.
- Sorry, man.
- Sorry about that.
Look, Vanessa, I mean,
make me understand, alright?
Guys, can we have some privacy?
Let's go in this building
over here.
Vanessa, I don't understand.
I mean,
I know I cared about you.
I don't know what's happened.
You're not being fair.
Man, I've been
totally faithful to you.
Look, Tommy,
I'm not trying to be a bitch.
She's a bitch.
I really like Frederick.
Frederick?
I'm sorry.
Really.
Oh, shit!
It'll take some time,
but you'll get over it.
We always do.
Don't worry about it.
All you gotta do
is just go home, you relax...
you chill out
for a little while.
Home? Wait a second, man.
That's the last thing
he needs to do.
He's gotta do
the exact opposite.
You gotta get out there,
see there's more women...
pretty women, too, man...
because that Vanessa
was nothing to scream at.
That's not what he needs.
What you need, man, is--
Look, if anybody knows
about depression, it's me.
How do you know what he needs?
You don't know what he needs.
You ain't never been through
what he's been through.
'Cause you ain't never
had a girl in your life!
So why you gonna go back
into that shit again?
That's right, man.
Look at you tonight...
over there in that pool hall
with that girl.
She looked like she was
ready to sit on your face.
You talkin' about
she's gonna be your friend.
Get the fuck outta here.
You wouldn't know
what to do with a girl...
if she was standin'
in front of you naked.
See, now,
I know all about women.
I've been that route...
and I know what Tommy's
goin' through.
Right.
You think you know
what Tommy's going through...
but you never cared
for any of them...
so you have no idea
what Tommy's going though.
You think I've always
been like this, bro?
Yeah.
No way, bro.
I used to fall head over heels
over women...
every time.
You know what I got in return?
Hurt...every time.
No more of that shit.
Those days are over.
Shit. I used to end up
lookin' all pitiful...
like Tommy over here and shit.
Bartender,
get my pitiful ass another beer.
You don't need all that.
Come on. Let me take you home.
Let's get out of here.
Why don't you let the guy
finish his drink?
What are you worried about?
Let the boy finish his drink.
- Let's go home, man.
- Let him finish his beer.
We going dancin'.
It's 3:00 in the morning.
Fuck dancing.
Let's just go home.
Dude, Willie's right.
Come on, let's go.
Let's get out of here.
Shut up! If you guys
wanna go home, then go home!
This is my moment!
I'm the one that's upset here.
My girlfriend leaves me,
my car gets wrecked.
I'm the one that needs
my friends to console me.
This is my moment. Mine.
Would y'all
give me my fuckin' moment...
without one stupid fight?
He's right. He's right.
This is Tommy's moment.
We forgot about that.
He's the guy
who's feelin' all depressed.
He's the guy who's feelin'
all bad and shit...
and we're over here thinkin'
about what we wanted.
We should want to do
whatever Tommy wants to do.
I guess so.
Sure, man.
Tommy, Tommy...
Come here.
What?
You're right.
This is your moment.
Whatever you want to do.
What do you want to do?
You want to go home
to an empty bed...
feelin' sorry for yourself,
all miserable...
depressed?
Or you wanna go out to a club,
meet a new girl...
fuck the shit out of her...
and forget about Vanessa's
stink hole ass?
What do you wanna do?
I wanna get me some pussy.
What's happening?
What's the cover charge tonight?
- All of you guys are together?
- We're together.
I wanna see three pieces of I.D.
from everybody.
Three pieces of I.D.?
Who carries 3 pieces of I.D.?
Word, man.
We got busted by the cops.
We didn't need
but one piece of I.D.
Alright, look, fellas.
You're blockin' the door.
Now please leave.
This is racist bullshit!
I might have three pieces
of I.D. What do you guys have?
You can have a signed statement
from God.
You're not gettin'
in this place tonight.
Let's see. I got three pieces
of I.D. right here.
You want to check 'em out?
None of those are valid I.D.
What are you talkin' about,
they're not valid?
They're valid.
This is racist fuckin' bullshit.
- Come on. Let's go.
- I'm not gonna stand for this.
I'm not going for this no more.
This is fuckin' racist bullshit!
You better put this dog back
on his leash before I hurt him.
Fuck you and your fuckin' club!
I'm organising a rally...
and I'm fuckin' callin'
Al Sharpton tomorrow!
Get the hell outta here.
Get him outta here, will you?
I'm organising a rally!
I'm marchin'!
I'm marchin' all over
your fuckin' head!
- Get off me, man!
- Take it easy, bro!
I'm serious. I'm calling
Fat-ass Al right now.
- Where's the phone?
- Yo, chill out, man.
Somebody give me a quarter.
I ain't got no money.
Psst!
Come here, man.
Come on.
You guys want to get
into the club tonight?
Yeah.
I can get you in.
I know a way.
Oh, yeah? How?
It'll cost you $5.00 apiece.
Come on, guys. Let's go.
It'll cost you eighteen
at the door, my brother.
And that's
if they let you in at all.
But how can we be sure
that your way's gonna work?
I give back your money.
I'm not a crook.
Just a businessman.
Everybody, give up five.
Fellas...
I hear you. I got it.
Let's go party.
Come on.
Now, what is this?
You guys want to get in or not?
Yeah.
Damn. Look at all this rust.
Man.
Go ahead.
- In there?
- Go ahead in there.
Where's the Rasta man?
I don't know.
I hear some music. Hold on.
You hear it?
Come on.
Alright!
Word, man.
Let's have a good time.
Fuck a good time.
I want some pussy.
Let's have fun this time.
Yo, man, fuck fun.
I want some pussy.
That's my boy.
Come on. Let's go.
Excuse me.
I was just standing
right over there.
I took one look at you...
and I thought,
"What a beautiful woman"...
but it was more than that.
It was style.
You're looking
quite lovely tonight.
Would you care to dance?
No, thank you.
And I'm thinking
you're the only person...
that I'd even waste my time
talking to.
Because beauty is anybody,
but style is--
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I was just standing
right over there...
and I took one look at you,
and I...
Would you like to join me
in a dance, sweetheart?
No, thank you.
A screwdriver,
and I want a Tom Collins.
Fifteen dollars.
Excuse me?
Fifteen dollars.
Fifteen dollars for two drinks?
Damn. What do they put in there?
Diamonds and shit?
You want the drinks or not?
How do you expect a poor man
to pay for drinks like this?
That's class discrimination.
That's appropriate.
You look like you have no class.
I guess you think
I want to dance with you.
Guess what, big head,
I wouldn't dance with you...
even if you didn't look like
a sabre-toothed tiger, bitch!
What do you think about that?
Shit. Fuckin' movie star.
Now you know
you gotta give me a dance.
Sure. Love to.
Come on.
OK, bye.
Rasta man.
What's happenin'?
How you doin', man?
Not too good. I was hoping
I could get my car back...
so I could drive
the fellows home tonight.
Well, where you live?
Go!
Get 'em! Yeah!
Get it, Vinny!
Motherfucker!
- Get off her.
- Get out of here.
What the fuck you doing?
What the fuck
is the matter with you?
You want me to kick your ass
or what?
Come on! Kick my fuckin' ass!
What are you doing?
What the fuck am I doing?
What the fuck are you doing?
What are you talking about?
You don't own me!
What the fuck
is the matter with you?
You want me to kick your ass,
motherfucker?
Fuck you, man! Fuck all of you!
You motherfucker!
Come on. Get off me, man!
You know who's responsible
for this?
I said get the fuck off me!
- Cool out!
- Get off me!
I ain't lettin' you go
till you calm the fuck down.
- Chill out!
- Alright. I'm OK.
You alright?
I'm fine. Let me go.
I'm OK. Thanks a lot.
I'm alright. Thanks.
Johnny, come here.
Hey, come here.
Stay away from me.
I'm not playin' with you.
What was that shit all about?
I'm talkin' to you, bro!
What was that all about?
I'm talkin' to you!
The girl you were dancing with?
That's the girl I'm crazy about!
She's the girl I cared about.
Leave me the fuck alone.
I'm really angry.
Leave me the fuck alone.
That's the girl
you were crazy about?
Fuckin' girl
works for X-rated movies.
You can see her fuckin' guys
for twenty-five cents.
Least she could do
is charge a full dollar!
Why don't you go back
and dance with her?
I don't need her.
You can have her.
Leave me the fuck alone!
Now you saying that shit after
you fucked up my whole night!
Why don't we just take
the whole fuckin' night...
and keep recycling that shit
over and over again!
Don't mean nothin' to you.
'Cause I deserve
a lot fuckin' better...
but you don't, motherfucker!
I'll tell you what you deserve,
motherfucker.
Get off me, man!
What you deserve
is a fuckin' kick in the ass.
Who the fuck
do you think you are?
What? Do you think
you're better than me?
You're just
a fuckin' piece of shit!
You're just like
the fuckin' rest of us, man.
You're just
a fuckin' piece of shit!
- What are you afraid of?
- Not you, Fernando!
You motherfucker. Come here!
Ten dollars, my brother.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can't believe
Johnny and Vinny...
just left us in that club
all by ourselves.
- What's happenin'?
- What's up?
Yo, fellas, what'll it be?
Let me get a ham and egg
on a roll.
Make that to go.
I'll have a...
Yo, Tom, man...
You know.
I don't know. What?
You not gonna put me down?
Didn't you just see me
give the Rasta ten dollars?
You didn't put nothing in that.
I've been paying
for shit for you all night.
You got it, you got it.
How do you think I get it?
I work for it!
So what you saying?
You want me to go work
for the white man?
You think the white man's
the only man hiring?
You give me no consideration.
I gotta pay rent.
I gotta get my damn car fixed.
I'm an actor.
I gotta get my head shots.
I can't afford to be
paying for you every week.
I suggest you forget
about that actin' shit...
'cause you ain't got
no real talent anyway.
With that money you could
buy me an egg sandwich.
What kind of shit
is that to say?
What kind of friend are you?
You hang out with me
just to bum money...
then you tell me I can't act?
You and Vinny are nothing
but a bunch of users.
Who needs this shit?
Fuck all y'all.
Who needs a friend like you?
You need a friend like me...
so I can teach you
how to be a real black man.
'Cause I knew your name
was Tom for a reason.
You are just a bum,
a fuckin' bum.
I'm sick and tired
of your phoney militant ass.
I'm sick of Vinny's
fuckin' put-downs.
And if Johnny wants to be
my friend, that's fine.
But if he doesn't,
then fuck him, too.
'Cause I'm a grown man.
I can stand on my own two feet.
Fuckin' bum!
I'm a bum? Fuck you
and your fake actor bullshit!
Let me tell you something.
I'm gonna fuckin' make it.
You hear me?
I'm gonna make it.
And if by some small chance
I don't make it...
then I'm gonna die trying.
Which is more than I can say
about anything...
you've ever done
in your life, motherfucker.
Fuck you!
You ain't gonna make shit!
Just a piece of shit
like the rest of us!
Shit!
Excuse me.
Yo, yo, baby, come here.
I want to talk to you
for a second.
You're lookin'
mighty good this morning...
but it's more than that.
You know what you got?
You got style. Really.
I mean,
even your dog's got style.
See, that's why
I wouldn't bother to talk...
Captioning made possible by
New Line Home Entertainment
---
Yo.
Man, what's up with that?
You know me? You talking to me?
Homey, you getting bad with me?
You want me to fuck you up?
- Fuck him up, man.
- Jump on him.
You couldn't fuck up
your own mother.
For that, motherfucker,
you die.
Come here, man.
Come here, man.
I'm hurting.
Get off the floor, man.
Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you for attending...
another performance
of Ghetto Theatre.
Return with us next week
as we perform our rendition...
of "Romeo and Latoya."
Thank you.
Did the mailman come?
Maria
to the front counter, please.
Maria to the front counter.
Johnny, Monday's the deadline...
on that Hispanic scholarship
I've been telling you about.
Yeah, right.
I forgot about that.
My son got his in
two weeks already...
so you better get moving.
Yeah, OK, I will.
OK.
Hey, how you doing, Daria?
Hi, Johnny.
How you doing?
I don't know.
I'm doing alright.
Haven't seen you in the store
in a long time.
Yeah. I've been feeling
kind of lazy.
You know?
Just not wanting to shop.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know that feeling.
Hey, I was wondering,
you know...
if you're not doing
anything tomorrow night...
would you like to go out
or something?
No, sorry. I've got plans.
Well, I'll be seeing you.
Alright, I'll be seeing you.
Maybe next week. OK?
Yeah, next week.
That sounds terrific.
OK. Bye.
Alright, bye.
God bless you.
I'll get her.
Look, Mr Stevens, we're fed up
with your behaviour.
We've sent you out
to several work programs...
and you never show up.
If you don't want your welfare
checks terminated...
you'd better straighten up.
This is because I'm black,
right?
What are you talking about?
You can be honest with me.
You're doing this to me
because I'm black, right?
Fine. I'll be honest.
I'm doing this because
I think you're a bum.
I'm a bum.
You calling me a bum
because I'm black, right?
If I was a white guy,
I'd be eccentric...
but now I got to be a bum?
No, if you were a white guy,
you'd be a white bum.
I don't think that's funny.
It wasn't meant to be.
I think you're not showing up
to our work programs...
because you don't want
to be involved in them...
which would simply lead to
a termination of your checks.
Oh, no.
Whatever gave you that idea?
I love your work programs.
Especially the one
you sent me on last week.
The one where I'm supposed
to clean the toilets.
I love that type of stuff.
I do that stuff
all the time at home.
That's what you'd expect
a black man to do, right?
This conversation is over.
I'm sending you
to one last program.
It's in Brooklyn.
Brooklyn? That's on
the other side of the world!
If you don't go,
your case will be terminated.
You're doing this
because I'm black, right?
We have several kinds of
magazines to choose from, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
By the way, sir,
what is your occupation?
We have several
kinds of magazines, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
May I ask
what your occupation is?
Oh, that's wonderful.
Yes, we have all kinds
of magazines, sir.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation.
What is your occupation, sir?
You're an agent. Really?
You mean like in movies?
Well, my name
is Thomas McNeal...
and I'm an actor.
Yeah, really.
What have I done?
Well, did you see "Rain Man"?
I was up to play a part
of a waiter in "Rain Man"...
but they wrote out the scene.
Yeah, that happens sometimes.
Listen. Look, forget
about the magazines.
They suck.
Just take my word for it.
Do you think I could get
your name or address--
Yes, we have
excellent magazines, sir.
All sorts of magazines.
Even magazines specific
to your occupation, sir.
Hello.
Hey! Candy, how you doing?
Yeah. I'm fine.
No, I'm fine.
When, tonight?
I can't. I'm hanging out
with the fellas.
No.
When?
When did I promise that?
Come on, baby.
You can't count on anything
I say when I'm doing that.
Hello?
Hello.
Hey! Wendy, how you doing?
I'm OK. What?
No, I can't, not tonight.
I'm hanging out
with the fellas.
No. I know, Wendy, but--
When did I promise that?
It figures.
I'm sorry, Wendy, but I can't.
I told you--
But, Wendy, listen--
But, Wendy, but listen--
But, Wendy, but--
Alright, forget it.
So I lied, OK? So forget--
Oh, shit.
What the fuck happened to you?
Oh, shit!
Oh, shit!
Damn.
It's me, man.
Thank God.
I thought white people
moved in the neighbourhood.
Man, I'm a little short
on cash tonight.
I was hoping you could lend me
a couple of bucks.
Come on, man, a few dollars.
How much you owe me already?
I don't know. $20, $30.
$137.86.
Come on, man.
What do you care anyway?
You don't work for it.
You get it
from your girlfriends.
What difference does it make
where I get it from, man?
That's how much you owe me.
Look, you be honest with me.
You're doing this
because I'm black, right?
I'm doing this because
you're an ugly motherfucker.
Do me a favour,
could you get the door, please?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Please.
This is because I'm black.
Because I'm a black man
in a white land.
I'm answering doors for you.
Next thing you know...
I'll be driving motherfucking
Miss Daisy. What?
I'm looking for Vinny.
Who?
Vinny.
The guy who lives here.
Vinny?
You must be
talking about Fernando.
No, man, she means Vinny.
Come on in, baby.
How are you doing?
Good. I brought you dinner.
It's pork chops
with yellow rice.
I made it myself.
That's beautiful.
Baby, that's so nice.
That's so sweet.
I wish everybody
was so nice to me.
Come on in.
I wanted to ask you something,
sweetie.
If it's possible,
you think you could give me...
a couple of dollars tonight?
I'm running a little short.
I thought we were
staying in tonight.
Well, what happened was this.
You know, Willie's--Willie's...
Willie's father
ran into a little problem...
and he's really, really sick.
And so, all the fellas
are all gonna get together...
and go visit him.
Right, Willie?
- Huh?
- Right, Willie?
Oh, yeah. He's gonna die.
And if we don't visit him,
he's gonna die.
And death hurts.
You see,
Willie has been so taken...
he's so stunned
with what's been going on...
that he says crazy things
sometimes, right, Willie?
That's right, Fernan--Vinny.
See what I mean?
You're so sweet.
How much do you need?
Damn, man, what are you...
dumb, stupid, retarded,
or all of the above?
I didn't do anything.
You did enough, bro.
Do me a favour.
From now on, if ever
I ask you a question...
don't say anything, man.
Just nod, alright?
I was just trying to help you.
Don't help, bro.
If I need help from you,
I know I'm in big trouble.
- Do me a favour, just nod.
- OK, OK.
So cut the shit.
Where are we going, bro?
We're going to pick up Johnny.
Johnny? Johnny?
We just hung out with
that sad-sack motherfucker.
We're gonna hang out
with him again?
Johnny's my best friend.
I know that, man, but...
that guy gets so depressing
and shit, man.
He's like fucking
Mr Spock and shit.
Look, Johnny ain't going,
I ain't going.
That's my boy, alright?
That's cool, man.
Tell the guy to lighten up,
that's all.
OK, Fernando.
Do me a favour, man.
I can't believe
you're calling me Fernando.
From now on, do me a favour...
please, especially
in front of a woman...
you got to call me Vinny.
Do me a favour, man.
Promise me.
Call me Vinny, alright?
I'll call you Vinny Pantagalini
if you want me to.
If I hear one of you fuckers
call me Fernando...
I swear to God,
I'll die of a heart attack.
What's up, John?
Willie, how you doing, man?
What's up?
- Yo, man.
- Hey, Fernando.
It's Vinny.
My name's Vinny.
Yeah, right. Vinny.
I forgot. I'm sorry.
It's alright.
So, what are you guys
doing here tonight, man?
Yo, man, it's Friday night.
Time to have some fun.
Yeah. I don't know.
I feel kind of depressed
tonight, man.
You see that, man.
The guy's depressed.
You don't want to take a chance
on ruining the guy's state.
I'm serious and shit.
Can you do me a favour,
Vincente, and stay out of this?
- I'm talking to my friend.
- That's fine.
The only thing I'm saying is,
the guy's not feeling--
Maybe we should
just not twist his arm.
Could you do me a favour
and go over there?
I'm talking to my friend,
alright?
No, I'm gonna go.
I'm just saying...
That's it.
I'm not saying any more.
Don't worry about it, Willie.
Man, it's not gonna be
the same without you.
I don't know, man.
I gotta wake up early tomorrow.
I gotta open up the store.
I don't know.
If you're not gonna do it
for yourself, do it for me.
Please don't let me hang out
with that clown all night.
I don't know.
Oh, man, I don't know.
Alright, you got me.
I'll go check out.
Give me a minute.
- Alright.
- OK, man? You owe me.
He's not going, right?
He's going.
- He's gonna go?
- He's going.
Alright.
Pay attention to me, OK?
Do I have your attention?
You wanted him to come, right?
Understand what I just said?
You wanted him to come.
You. Nobody else.
The magic word is you.
Get to the point.
You wanted him to come.
You are responsible for him.
- What?
- That's right.
If I should have
a boring, depressing evening...
because of him,
you are responsible.
You. Nobody else.
You, alright? You.
You.
Jesus. I wear
this stupid outfit so much...
one morning it's going
to jump out of this locker...
and meet me at my front door.
Hello.
I know what
you're talking about, man.
I got five of these ugly suckers
myself at home.
Here's the scholarship form.
You better take it
because Monday's the deadline.
Ah, Pedro.
What?
I don't know, man.
I'm not the college type,
alright?
No, what type are you?
The supermarket type?
Don't be stupid.
You got a good shot at this.
You got excellent grades
in high school. You did.
I can't understand
how you wasted two years...
hanging around this joint.
Because I...
Man, I'll do it next year,
alright?
No. Next year
will be too late...
because you'll be too old
to qualify.
Take it.
What are you afraid of?
Take it.
Why Johnny, man? Why him?
Would you shut up?
Here he comes.
What's up, guys?
Where we going? Come on.
We're going to pick up Tommy.
OK. Let's go, Willie.
Vamanos, Fernando.
It's you. You.
Alright,
would you just shut up?
Did you call Tommy to let him
know you were coming?
Nah, man. I'm sure it's cool.
You can't go barging into
people's houses like that.
That's ridiculous, man.
That's not right.
Watch this.
Open up! It's the police.
Open up! I know you got
that 9-year-old girl in there.
Oh, man!
You big imitation
Italian motherfucker.
Come on in, y'all.
What y'all doing here?
It's Friday night.
Hang out night, man.
Y'all should call somebody
before you come to their house.
Why, man? What's up?
I made plans
with my lady for tonight.
See, I told you, man.
Come on, bro!
You don't want to hang out
with the fellas?
Y'all should call me.
You'd have called earlier,
maybe I could change my plans.
It's too late now.
I told you.
Didn't I tell you, guys?
You shouldn't be barging into
people's houses like that.
If he ain't going,
he ain't going. That's it.
What do you mean, "If he's
not going, he's not going"?
That's bullshit!
What's the matter?
It's like you said.
You shouldn't force somebody...
to do something
they don't want to do.
Twist their arm and all that.
This is different, OK?
Tommy's got to go.
Oh, yeah? Why?
Because Tommy's got something
that you and me and Willie...
ain't got all put together.
- What's that?
- Tom has a car!
Come on! We need you
and your second-hand cop car.
You got to come.
What's the matter with you?
There's my lady.
You gonna give up
a night on the town...
to hang out with some girl?
She ain't some girl, man.
She's an incredibly beautiful
and wonderful girl, alright?
This time,
I think it's really love.
Alright, man.
Come on, man!
When did Cupid shoot you
in your ass?
You gonna give up a night of
hangin' with your homeboys...
your bestest friends
for years and years...
just to hang out
with some ugly girl?
She ain't ugly, man.
She's incredibly beautiful.
Come on, man.
I know your taste in women.
She probably looks like a duck.
That's what you think.
This girl's so fine...
you be begging to drink
her bath water, motherfucker.
Right here, I got $10
that says your girl is ugly.
I'm talkin' "ug"-fucking-"ly".
- Can you back it up?
- Yeah, I'll back it up.
Who here's with me?
Come on! You guys know
Tommy's taste in women.
Alright, alright,
I got a $10 food stamp...
that says this girl's ugly
with a capital "Ug."
I got $10 right here
on that ugly person, man.
That's $30 I got to back up.
That's not fair.
You're the one
that says she's so fine.
Are you afraid she's ugly,
and you gonna lose?
I ain't afraid she's ugly, man.
I know the girl's fine.
People have different opinions
what fine is.
How we gonna handle this?
I got it, man.
Why don't we judge it like
a Miss America pageant?
We vote on
a scale of 1 to 10, bro.
Your girlfriend's
got to be at least a nine.
Nine? Come on, man.
Nine's too high.
If we vote,
she gotta be at least a five.
Five? My grandmother's a five,
and she's dead.
I don't care, man.
Nine is just too high.
She's gotta be at least a seven.
There you go, man.
Seven is cool.
I could do that.
How about you?
Fine.
You want to know what fine is?
I'll show you fine.
This girl is fine.
F-i-n-e. Fine.
That should be her last name.
Vanessa Fine.
And another thing, y'all,
don't be so obvious.
Don't be staring at her
like she's an eye chart...
'cause she's not only beautiful,
but she's smart...
and she'll pick up on that.
- Who is it?
- It's Tommy.
Hi, baby. How you doing?
Honey, what you doing?
How come you ain't dressed?
I thought
we was going out tonight.
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm really sick.
It just came over me
this morning.
How come you ain't call me?
I'm sorry.
I've been asleep all day.
I just forgot.
I guess that means
tonight is off.
Yeah. I'm really sorry.
OK. Alright,
I hope you feel better.
- Thanks, babe.
- OK.
Bye-bye.
She's beautiful, ain't she?
She looks like a duck.
Where's my money, man?
She's gorgeous.
Willie, tell him, man.
I give the ho a two.
Where do you keep your eyes?
In your ass?
That's how I feel.
Come on, man.
Y'all got to be fair now.
Cough up the dillies, bro.
Wait a second.
That's two for your side.
I think she's gorgeous.
That means Johnny here
has the deciding vote.
No, man. I don't want
to be deciding vote.
What are you afraid of, bro?
I'm not afraid, man.
I'm not afraid.
I didn't get a good look at her.
That's what happened.
He didn't get a good look,
so we're even.
Even?
Bring the girl back out, bro.
What? That's stupid.
I ain't bringing her back out.
Then I guess that means we won.
It's still
two against one, right?
$30 is $30.
Hi, sweetie.
What are you still doing here?
I was worried about you, baby.
You want me to get you
some aspirin from the store?
- What are you doing?
- Admiring your beautiful skin.
You know
I always liked your skin.
You're such a romantic.
I don't need anything.
I just need
to get back to sleep, OK?
OK. You go get
your beauty rest, darlin'.
- OK.
- Alright.
- Bye, lover.
- Bye-bye.
Oh, no, guys. No, no.
I don't want to be
the deciding vote, OK?
Just be honest.
Alright. OK? Alright.
She was sort of like...
I don't know. She was...
'Cause she had...
You know...Hell, man...
She was an eight.
- Alright! An eight!
- Damn!
Make out all checks to
Mr Thomas McNeal. Thank you.
You told me to be honest, man.
You was honest, Johnny.
Actually, you weren't.
She's really a nine.
You know who's responsible
for this, right?
You're responsible for this.
Where's the first stop, y'all?
Wherever the girlies are, bro.
You're crazy, Vinny, man.
You keep messing with
them girls like that...
and one day, you'll come down
with something strange.
Nah, not me.
Let me show you something, man.
You see this here?
Do you know what this is?
- What?
- What is this?
- What is this?
- I know what it is.
- What is this?
- I know.
- What is this?
- It's a condom, man.
Wrong. It's a super-condom.
This thing has an ingredient
in it called Nonoxynol-9.
You hear what I said?
Nonoxynol-9.
Alright. With that,
no matter who you're with...
no matter what they got,
with this...
knock that shit right out.
You can fuck an elephant
with this condom.
I'm sure you have, Vinny.
Oh, man, please.
Don't bring your girlfriend
into the conversation.
Johnny, I didn't know
you liked fat women.
Oh, shit! Look at that.
The perfect opportunity for me
to use my super-condom, man.
Slow the car down, man.
Yo, yo, yo! Yo, baby!
Yo, Vinny! Get your ass
out of my face, man.
What's your name, man?
My name is Vinny.
I'm from Italy.
I'm trying to drive here.
Get your hairy,
pimply anus in here, man.
Damn. This is hazardous
to my driving, man.
Come on, baby,
why don't you come for a ride?
What are you doing, man?
You trying to pick up
my daughters?
Oh, shit.
Shit, man.
Let's get the fuck out of here.
You don't pick up my daughters!
You're a puto!
I'll kill you, man!
Come on, Tommy.
Move the car, man!
Oh, shit!
Look, man,
if them bottles hit my car...
I'd get out
and kick your ass, man.
It wasn't my fault.
It was your fault.
You're the one who made...
that crazy Puerto Rican
come over here.
Hey, hey, hey. Come on.
Watch it with that
"crazy Puerto Rican" stuff.
Don't say stuff about my people.
What stuff? I just said
"crazy Puerto Rican."
You said it again.
I told you not to say it, man.
Don't talk about
my people like that.
Yo, Vinny, man.
Did you hear the way
he's talking about our people?
Yo, Vinny, man.
Don't you care?
Man, what am I supposed
to say to that shit?
Come on, man. Say anything.
You don't even think
you're Puerto Rican, do you?
Yo, he's Italian.
No, man.
I can't believe you said that.
It's not true, man.
I don't think I'm Italian.
Any more brews back there?
No, Tommy, you had the last one.
Damn. We got to stop.
I'm going to get some more.
Yo, Johnny,
put another dollar in, man.
- Here's my two.
- Thanks.
Hey, man.
You ain't got nothing?
You can't put in 50 cents?
Damn, Willie, you're pitiful.
Come on, put me down.
I'll put you down, man.
You're an ugly motherfucker.
How's that?
Shit, man. I'm sorry.
Don't worry about it.
We all got your way.
No, no, no,
don't count me in that.
No more, man. I've had it.
Come on, Vinny.
Willie would do it for you.
That's the point, man.
That boy never has any money,
and I'm tired of it.
That's a black thing, you see?
The white man oppressing me,
keeping me down.
What is this, man?
The Gettysburg Address?
Forget it.
I'll put in the difference.
I just want some brew.
You're being brainwashed
by the white man...
into thinking that
all minorities got to be poor.
Willie, please shut the fuck up.
Boy's always got to be
coming up with something.
"Put me down."
White man, black man.
Shit.
Do yourself a favour, man.
Get a job.
Stop bothering people.
Do you have a job, Vinny?
Yeah!
We're talking about him, not me.
I know, man. Do you have a job?
There it is.
Ain't none of your business
if I got a job or not.
That's because
you don't have a job, man.
It's because all the money
you've gotten...
and all the food
you've ever gotten...
everything you've ever gotten
in your life...
you've gotten
from poor innocent women.
That's why, man.
You're a leech and a parasite.
You know who's responsible
for this, right?
Look at me.
You know
who's responsible for this?
Yo! Let's hit the road.
Yo, man. That looks like
Louie-Louie over there.
Oh, shit. That's him.
Louie!
- Lou-Lou.
- He's dope.
What's up, man?
What's up?
What's going on, man?
What you doing around here?
Just chillin', workin'.
Doing the same old.
Tell me something, any parties?
Anything going out tonight?
Not in the boogie down
Bronx, homeboy.
Bronx is dead.
But y'all should
check out Manny-hatty.
Yeah? Manhattan's
what's happening tonight?
I don't feel like going
to Manhattan tonight.
Manhattan is where it's at.
That's why I won't even be
hangin' in the Bronx, chief.
Manhattan is the life, B.
Let's just hang out
in the Bronx tonight, alright?
Whatever, home piece.
I got to tip.
Take care, man.
Lou-Lou is bad, bro.
He's dope and all that.
That boy's got dollars
on his dollars.
Alright.
Here we go all around.
One for Johnny.
Can I check your ID, please?
One for Willie...
who didn't put in
a fucking dime as usual.
- And one for Tommy here.
- Thank you, brother.
Excuse me, Tommy.
How many beers did you have?
I don't know. Two or three.
Two or three, man?
You shouldn't have another beer
if you're driving. I'm sorry.
Please, man.
Give me that goddamn--
I'm serious. You can't be
drinking and driving.
Man, you're going to
be drinking and walking...
if you don't give me
that fucking beer.
Come on, man.
We got six of them here.
- Don't give it to him.
- Get the fuck out of here.
What's the matter with you?
Grow up, Johnny, man.
- Acting like a little kid.
- You are.
I don't know
what you're afraid of, man.
What the fuck
are you afraid of?
Oh, shit. Look at that.
Louie-Louie said there ain't
nothing happening in the Bronx.
Oh, my God!
Make sure there ain't no big,
fat, hairy motherfuckers...
with beer bottles
out there, man.
Whoo! Baby! Whoo!
- Pull the car over.
- Chill out, man. Shit.
Come here!
Mama!
Come on, man. Pull over.
The last motherfucker
was throwing shit at my car.
- Just calm down.
- Pull over, man.
Why the fuck are you talking
to little girls, man?
- Pull over.
- I'm pulling over.
You're an asshole, man.
Damn!
Come on out here, Tommy.
Where'd them women go, man?
You hear that?
Where's that coming from, man?
Where's that music coming from?
Look right there. The window.
Shit. There's a party
up there. Let's go.
No, man.
Nobody knows you up there.
I'll just knock on the door
and say, "Jose sent us."
Jose? You don't know
no Jose, Vinny, man.
It's a Puerto Rican party.
There's got to be
one Jose up there, right?
Vinny, man,
it's not going to work.
Damn! Quiet.
What's the matter with you?
It's coming from over there.
It's right here.
It's not going to work, man.
Stop it, will you?
This is going to work.
Let me do the talking.
I'll get us in.
Act natural.
How you doing?
Can I help you?
Jose sent us.
Yeah, well, OK. Come in.
Thank you.
Man, I hate house parties.
I always feel like
I'm locked in a closet.
You're the last guy
who should say anything...
'cause you ain't got no money.
You got in here for free,
so shut the fuck up.
Where's the food?
You can get some food, man.
I'm going to get me a woman.
Damn, I love Latin music.
Yeah, Tommy?
I didn't know that, man.
Great. Why don't
you go ahead and dance?
I love the music,
but I could never dance to it.
Sure you could, man.
It's real easy.
Anybody can dance.
Here, I'll show you.
Watch this.
Nah. That's OK.
Come on. Try it, man.
No, man, I'm afraid to.
- Why, man?
- Because that's how it starts.
That's how what starts?
You know, Johnny.
That's how it starts.
No, I don't know, man.
How what starts?
It starts with the dancing, man.
Next thing you know, I'll be
wearing polyester suits...
with bell-bottom pants,
eating rice and beans.
It's alright.
Tommy, I take that as
a racist statement, man.
That ain't no racist statement.
It's just a fact. I don't
look good in bell-bottoms.
Hi, baby, come here.
You're very, very attractive.
I just want
to tell you something.
Come here for a second.
Ugly bitch.
Who invited you here, man?
Jose.
Jose?
Jose.
Which Jose? Point him out.
He's probably not here.
He's late or something.
What's his last name, this Jose?
That's it, Tommy.
You're getting it, man.
Oh, my God, man.
I feel my pants expanding
at the bottom already.
Cut the shit, man,
and just keep dancing.
Am I rocking it?
Yeah, you're rocking it, man.
Just keep it loose.
Keep it flowing.
You're pretty good at this, man.
You should get
on that dance floor...
and find you
one of those hot Spanish mamas.
You might find
your future wife tonight.
Not me, man.
I'm not going to go that far.
I've already got my mind
on a special girl.
Yeah? Who is he?
Tommy, this girl,
she's innocent and virginal.
This the same girl you've been
talking about for weeks?
You still
ain't got that booty yet?
This girl's not about booty.
She's a shy and sensitive thing.
She's innocent, virginal,
shy, and sensitive.
I don't know about you,
but she sounds like a drag.
Yeah, so after
I finished law school...
I decided I didn't want
to devote my life to one thing.
So I was trying to find
something in my life...
that I could do
on those dull spaces...
like on the weekends
and on holidays.
That's when I decided
to become an astronaut.
Mendez. It was Mendez.
No, no, it wasn't Mendez.
It wasn't Mendez. It was...
Perez. Perez?
No, it wasn't Perez.
Couldn't have been Perez.
Vasquez. Jose Vasquez.
You know what I think, bro?
I think you're
full of shit, black boy.
Is that what you think I am?
I'm not black. I'm Dominican.
You're a Dominican?
Get the fuck out of here!
Let's go!
Nobody invited you!
You guys come back here again,
I'm going to get my gun.
Fucking pendejo.
Goddamn! What the fuck's
the matter with you guys?
What the hell did you guys do?
- What?
- Who?
What? Who?
Come on, you guys know.
You must have done something
to get our asses kicked out.
You want to know
what the fuck I did?
I was born black, motherfucker!
That's what I did!
Stop with that black shit.
They threw me out of that party
because I was black!
Hold up, man.
They said that to you in there?
That's right.
That's your people for you.
Wait a second, Willie.
I was in that party, man.
I was in there,
fighting for you.
You going to say that shit now?
That wasn't right, man.
I didn't do shit.
Yo, Willie.
Are you OK, man?
Yeah, man.
Y'all just stop thinking
about it, man.
Those guys were assholes,
alright?
Wait a second.
Where you going?
I'm driving into Manhattan.
Louie-Louie was right.
The Bronx is wack tonight.
When you get to Harlem,
let me out.
What you got against Manhattan?
I wait all week
to hang out with you guys.
I'm usually
in my damn, funky apartment...
sitting there doing nothing,
bored to death.
I die for these Fridays.
I want to hang out
with my homeboys...
not some white people
from Manhattan.
I'm driving into Manhattan
and that's that, man...
so just grow up
and deal with it.
Alright! Manhattan!
Let's get some rich white women.
That's what you need,
a white woman.
That'll make you feel
just great, won't it?
Yo, fellas.
See that building right there?
I auditioned for a part
in a TV movie there last week.
Seriously, Tommy?
What happened, man?
They loved me, man.
I was the best thing that
they've seen in a long time.
- They told you that?
- When I was in college...
I was the best actor
in my acting class.
They all looked up to me
like I was William Shatner.
College? Tommy, I didn't know
you went to college.
Yeah, I went to college.
I got a degree, man.
Did you like it?
To tell you the truth,
it sucked.
It's like a big stall, you know?
Big nothing.
I'll tell you, man,
I agree with Tommy.
I went to college.
What? You?
You went to college?
What? Hey, man.
I'm a college man.
What? I'm serious, man.
And I'll tell you something.
It was the most miserable,
frustrating...
humiliating two weeks
of my life. Yeah.
Yo, Tommy, man...
if somebody came up to you
and said...
"I'm interested
in going to college"...
and all that,
blah, blah, blah...
what would you tell him?
I'd tell them
not to waste their time, man.
You go to school for four years,
get that stupid degree...
then you get out
and get the same lousy jobs...
for the same lousy pay, man.
It ain't worth it, man.
Yeah.
I see what you're saying.
Look where we're at!
Yeah! Manny-hanny!
This is the life! Yes!
Come on in. It ain't no sin.
You got a quarter?
Yeah, I got a quarter.
You got a quarter?
Yeah, I got a quarter.
Man, watch it!
Damn, they got a little TV.
That's cool, man.
Shut the fuck up.
Put the quarter in.
Cool it, man.
Watch your leg.
I'm trying to get
the quarter in, alright?
Somebody's rubbing against me.
I don't like that shit.
You want to borrow my
super-condom with Nonoxynol-9?
That shit ain't funny, man.
Hey, man! Watch it!
Great, man. Just great, Tommy.
What happened?
Tommy knocked the quarter
out of my hand.
It's lying there
right by his foot.
Why don't you bend down
and pick up the quarter?
Yo, man, fuck you.
Come on, man.
I ain't bending down
in this fucking place.
You're crazy.
I'll get it, man.
I can reach it.
- Oh, man!
- Whoa! Take it easy!
Watch your hand, man!
This is stupid, man!
Everybody out
of the fucking booth!
Get out of the fucking booth.
Come on. Let's go.
Out of the fucking booth.
Johnny?
Johnny, did you
get the quarter, man?
- I got the quarter.
- Good.
Let's go.
In the fucking booth.
You in yet, man?
Lock the door.
Put it in.
- Shit!
- That's bad!
Wish those men would move
so I could see these women!
That girl looks familiar.
Damn. She's working it.
Wait a minute!
What a gyp! Gyp!
Come on. What the fuck?
We'll get another quarter.
What's the matter?
Yo, Johnny.
Yo, man, what's up?
Damn, man. I knew that boy
was scared of pussy...
but this is ridiculous.
You want to talk about it?
Whatever it is,
it can't be that bad.
What happened?
Did Vinny fart in the booth?
That's funny.
I'll tell you what happened.
The boy saw a pussy
and went into stitches.
He ain't never
going to recover, either.
Come on, Vinny.
Everybody's seen a pussy
by the time they're 18.
Nah, man. I'm serious.
There's a lot of
real late bloomers out there.
Watch this.
Hey, Johnny.
Which way do a pussy go, man?
Like this or like this?
What are you afraid of?
Fucking asshole!
You could've got us killed!
Fuck!
Shit.
Man. Fuck.
Fuck!
You really fucked it up
this time, man.
Fuck you, Vinny, alright?
Fuck you!
Find a phone
so I can call a towing place.
You see that, huh?
He's gonna start
with that depression shit.
I give him five minutes
before he starts talking...
about people starving
in China and shit. Watch.
Would you leave him alone?
Watch.
You alright, man?
He's a fucking asshole, man!
He could've got us
all fucking killed, man!
Alright, man. Take it easy.
It's OK. We're all alive.
It's cool.
I just feel stupid.
I'm just over here caught up
in my own problems...
when, hell, there's people
in China who are starving.
I'm over here
feeling sorry for myself.
Willie, tell me, man.
Did you ever know somebody
that you thought...
was better than
the rest of the world...
you know, different...
then you came to find out
that they're not...
that they're actually
even worse?
Who you talking about?
Fernando?
Hey, Vinny, man.
It's Vinny, alright?
Come on!
Alright, alright.
We got it, we got it.
Now would you
shut the fuck up?
I'm not worried
about that clown.
I'm talking about a girl...
a girl that I was once
really crazy about.
That's what I'm talking about.
What made you think of her?
'Cause I saw her tonight.
She was in that X-rated movie
we saw at the peep show.
Was that the innocent
and virginal girl...
you've been telling us
about for weeks?
Yeah. That's her. That's Daria.
What made you think
she was innocent and virginal?
I don't know. What do you mean?
What are you talking about?
Did she come tell you
she was innocent and virginal?
No, man. Come on.
Who's gonna come up to you
and say shit like that?
That's what I'm trying to say.
You can't hate this girl...
'cause she's not
what you want her to be.
Yeah, but you don't
understand, man.
The way she was acting,
I just thought she was--
Yeah, but that's
what you're thinking.
You can't blame her
for what you're thinking.
Stop trying to turn this girl
into something she's not.
She's probably
still a good person.
I mean, if I was a girl
and I hated working...
I could see myself
up on that screen...
you know, naked, shaking my ass.
Fuck that. You make a lot
of money doing that shit.
Sure beats cleaning toilets.
You're crazy, man.
You're crazy.
Come on.
Tommy.
This is gonna
cost me a fortune, man.
I know it.
Alright.
So who's Thomas McNeal?
Right here.
Here you go.
We're open 24 hours.
You call me later,
I'll give you an estimate.
Alright.
So where are the keys?
- I left them in the ignition.
- Alright.
So what's the move?
We're going to the subway
or what?
Hey! Pay the fare!
You over there!
The fare ain't fair, Uncle Tom!
Help me! Help me!
Help me! Help me! Help me!
OK, fellas,
let's see some I.D.
What a night.
Is there something funny?
You guys, cut it out!
You find this amusing?
Thomas McNeal.
Yeah.
What's your profession?
I'm an actor.
Can't you tell?
He's acting like he's terrified.
Yo, Vinny, man.
Stop that shit. Damn!
I have in my hand an I.D. card
with your picture on it...
but it says Fernando Cuevas.
So?
So your friend over here
just called you Vinny.
So that's a nickname,
that's all.
What's your nationality?
I'm Puerto Rican, man.
Oh, my God!
I can't believe it!
I never thought I'd live
to hear you say that.
Why your friends call you Vinny?
It's a nickname, that's all.
From Fernando to Vinny?
Why isn't it something
like Furman or fur ball?
It's Vinny, that's all.
Is he telling the truth?
I ain't say nothin'.
I don't know nothin'.
I asked you a question!
Why do you call him Vinny
if his name is Fernando?
He thinks he's Italian.
Thinks he's Italian?
So, you think you're Italian?
Let me tell you something.
I'm Italian, OK?
You see that name? Saninelli?
I'm Italian...
and I'm gonna tell you
something.
No matter what you do,
no matter what you say...
you will never be Italian.
Scum like you could never be
in the same company as me.
Now I'm gonna write you
a summons.
I got to tell you.
It's so easy
to be a tough guy...
when you got a gun on one side
and a badge on the other.
But I'm gonna tell you
something, and I mean this.
They're nothing
but a bunch of punks to me.
I tell you what.
They're nothing
but a bunch of thugs...
with a license, and I hate 'em.
I swear to God, I hate cops.
I fucking hate cops.
Me, too.
Could you pass me the ketchup
there, Fernando Cuevas?
You think you're funny?
You penniless motherfucker.
Come on, y'all.
Let's leave fur ball alone.
You gonna gang up on me
and shit?
Anybody want to donate
to the United Negro--
Would you mind--
Don't encourage him.
The guy needs some money.
What'd I tell you about
letting your father out?
Please. Let's go.
I just wanted something to eat.
See that there?
That there is your future.
What?
That's right. You keep up with
that putting me down thing...
and then your white man,
black man thing...
and they oppress me.
You keep that up, that's exactly
the way you're gonna wind up.
You think that shit's funny?
Come on.
He's just goofing on you
'cause you goofed on him.
I can't laugh that shit off.
You think that shit is funny?
You think I like being this way?
You think I like being scared...
not knowing if I'm gonna make it
through the week?
That's not funny.
Don't play like that.
What is it with you?
What is it? Huh?
What?
What? What is it with you?
You feel like
there's this beam of light...
that shines on you from God,
and then the rest of us...
we're all just fucked up?
Is that what you feel?
I feel that way sometimes.
You're an asshole.
Your mother's an asshole.
You're the fucking asshole.
Your whole family's
a fucking asshole!
Menu?
No, thanks. Two coffees.
I'm so tired.
I've been working all day.
I know. I'm so glad it's over.
We should go play pool.
I love watching you play.
You're really good at it.
I just like to show off.
That's why.
Hey, how you doing?
So, being that...
you're the most beautiful woman
sitting at this table...
you know what
I'm gonna do for you?
I'm gonna devote all my time
and attention just to you.
Hey, hey.
Now that I got rid of her,
you and I can talk...
because you're the one
I was really eyeing anyway.
No, thanks.
I have herpes.
Wait!
Nonoxynol-9...
knock that shit right out.
He a friend of yours?
Not really.
That's good to know,
'cause he's a real asshole.
You know what?
I just tried telling him that
a few minutes ago...
but he wouldn't believe me.
I guess we think alike.
Maybe...
or just maybe the whole world
thinks he's an asshole.
What's your name?
- What?
- Do you have a name?
My name is Johnny.
I'm Luna.
It's nice to meet you.
You look kind of familiar to me.
Haven't I seen you
in here before?
I doubt that.
Didn't I see you come in here
once with your girlfriend?
I doubt that, too.
So you don't have a girlfriend.
No, not really.
Look...
Lila and I are gonna go
shoot some pool down the street.
Want to come?
I gotta ask my friends--
just talk to my friends.
Look, Johnny...
I don't want to marry you.
I just want to play pool
with you.
Come on.
So, tell me your life story,
Johnny.
You want to know my life story?
My life story.
There's actually not much
to tell at all, actually.
Do you like girls?
I like girls.
I like girls a lot.
I like girls.
Why do you got to ask that for?
It's a start.
You're really good at this.
I didn't invite you to play
so you could watch me lose.
I paid for half
my college tuition...
by beating the pants off guys
who thought they were hot shit.
I see. You're a college girl.
That's right.
I know a lot of people
who said that college...
really isn't all
that it's hyped up to be.
They even actually said it's
a big waste of time--serious.
What idiots told you that?
Well...
those idiots over there.
You know you're
perpetrating a fraud, right?
Excuse me?
You're perpetrating a fraud.
You are what I call a sad excuse
for a fine African sister.
And what's that
supposed to mean?
What I mean is you're dressing
like a white girl...
you're hanging out
with this white girl...
and you even smell
like a white person.
You trying to call me
an Uncle Tom?
I'm calling you Aunt Tomini.
You got a lot of balls.
You're saying that
'cause I'm black, right?
If I was a white guy,
I'd be speaking my mind.
Because I'm black,
got to have big balls.
I want you to realise...
that there's something
very, very strange...
going on here tonight--
something very strange.
Fucking telling me.
Look at the situation.
Out of this whole damn
stuck-up place...
you got two girls
who could speak English.
One of them
is talking to Johnny...
and the other one's
talking to Willie.
There's something strange
going on here.
Fuck these people.
Where are you from?
All over.
I'm an army brat.
My dad was in the service,
so we travelled around a lot.
Where?
Germany, France...
Hawaii.
Wow!
That's great.
Teaches you there's this big
beautiful world out there...
just waiting for you
to take a bite out of it.
You know what I mean?
No, I don't know.
Tell me.
You got a lot of nerve
coming up to me...
someone you don't even know,
pointing your damn finger...
and you ain't done shit to help
yourself and nobody else.
Wait a minute!
Have you gone
to any demonstrations?
- No, but--
- Have you signed any petitions?
I didn't have a pen,
so I didn't--
Have you even bothered
to get off your lazy ass...
and join any organisations?
Never did. But--
Tell me. Do you vote?
No. I missed this year
'cause Dinkins wasn't running.
I'll catch--
And you're gonna tell me
I'm perpetrating a fraud?
You're the one
that's perpetrating a fraud.
I know what this place needs,
a jammie.
Do a jammie?
Right here?
- Right now?
- Yeah.
As usual, I'm winning.
Must feel great to always win.
Yeah, it feels great.
I need something like that.
I need something that
every time I did it, I won.
You know what I think?
I think everybody's got that.
You just got to open up
and allow yourself to find it.
Go ahead.
What are you afraid of?
You fucked my wife!
You son of a bitch!
You fucked my wife.
How dare you speak to me
in such an outrageous--
Don't fucking point at me!
Come on, you motherfucker!
- Come on. Come on!
- You bastard!
What is going on?
Let's go out for a little bit.
What?
Get the fuck out of here!
What? What?
That's the guy!
He fucked your wife!
I was there!
And when he was done,
I fucked her.
Well, I guess I'll have
to give you my number...
or else
we'll never finish the game.
You would've won anyway.
You were just very good at it.
Never know.
Your luck might change.
Here.
Why don't we...be friends?
How's that sound?
Sounds nice.
Sounds very, very nice.
Please make sure
you call the right number.
Oh, yeah.
I won't call the wrong number,
I promise you.
I will never forgive you
for leaving me in there...
with those idiots--never!
I'm sorry!
There's no excuse for this--
none.
Hey, hey...
did you ever figure out
where you saw me before?
Huh?
Remember you said
that I looked familiar to you?
What am I? A piece of gum?
I've never seen you before.
See, forget it. Now you still...
Lala, come on! Don't go home.
Oh, shit!
Did you see me in there?
I was brilliant, man.
Excellent.
What? You sucked. What was all
that Shakespeare shit?
All that wither, hither,
yonder bullshit?
You sucked!
You wouldn't know the difference
between a good or bad actor.
But I know the difference
between a bad actor...
and an actor that sucked.
Hey, Johnny...
what happened with that chick?
She's gonna be my friend.
She gonna be a what?
She's gonna be my friend.
Get out of here!
Friend?
Fucking...
You see, a good actor
reacts to a situation.
Did you see my eyes
when we were in there?
The way they kind of twitched
around when I was in the moment?
Your actin' sucks.
Your shit is fake.
Fuck you. Your mama's fake.
I almost had a part
in "Rain Man."
Did you almost have a part
in "Rain Man?" No.
I almost played a waiter
in "Rain Man."
By now I'd be famous.
People'd be stoppin' me
in the streets going...
"Oh, shit.
Ain't that the brother...
who played the waiter
in 'Rain Man'?"
Vanessa.
Vanessa!
Yo, relax. Be cool.
- Tommy!
- Don't do it!
Be mature about it, man.
Tommy?
Yo, who the hell
is this guy, baby?
Baby? Baby?
Tommy, stop it!
You're supposed to be sick.
You look really sick.
Yo, what is it?
Just leave her alone, alright?
I'm alright.
Y'all can let me go.
Vanessa...
Can we go somewhere
and talk about this?
Look, let me have a minute
with him.
You know this guy?
Yeah.
If there's something going on,
why don't you just tell me?
Come on, please?
Just let me talk to him.
Go ahead.
If you want me,
I'll be on the corner.
Vanessa, I just--
I mean, I don't understand.
I come out...
Guys, me and Vanessa
would like to talk.
Absolutely.
- Sorry, man.
- Sorry about that.
Look, Vanessa, I mean,
make me understand, alright?
Guys, can we have some privacy?
Let's go in this building
over here.
Vanessa, I don't understand.
I mean,
I know I cared about you.
I don't know what's happened.
You're not being fair.
Man, I've been
totally faithful to you.
Look, Tommy,
I'm not trying to be a bitch.
She's a bitch.
I really like Frederick.
Frederick?
I'm sorry.
Really.
Oh, shit!
It'll take some time,
but you'll get over it.
We always do.
Don't worry about it.
All you gotta do
is just go home, you relax...
you chill out
for a little while.
Home? Wait a second, man.
That's the last thing
he needs to do.
He's gotta do
the exact opposite.
You gotta get out there,
see there's more women...
pretty women, too, man...
because that Vanessa
was nothing to scream at.
That's not what he needs.
What you need, man, is--
Look, if anybody knows
about depression, it's me.
How do you know what he needs?
You don't know what he needs.
You ain't never been through
what he's been through.
'Cause you ain't never
had a girl in your life!
So why you gonna go back
into that shit again?
That's right, man.
Look at you tonight...
over there in that pool hall
with that girl.
She looked like she was
ready to sit on your face.
You talkin' about
she's gonna be your friend.
Get the fuck outta here.
You wouldn't know
what to do with a girl...
if she was standin'
in front of you naked.
See, now,
I know all about women.
I've been that route...
and I know what Tommy's
goin' through.
Right.
You think you know
what Tommy's going through...
but you never cared
for any of them...
so you have no idea
what Tommy's going though.
You think I've always
been like this, bro?
Yeah.
No way, bro.
I used to fall head over heels
over women...
every time.
You know what I got in return?
Hurt...every time.
No more of that shit.
Those days are over.
Shit. I used to end up
lookin' all pitiful...
like Tommy over here and shit.
Bartender,
get my pitiful ass another beer.
You don't need all that.
Come on. Let me take you home.
Let's get out of here.
Why don't you let the guy
finish his drink?
What are you worried about?
Let the boy finish his drink.
- Let's go home, man.
- Let him finish his beer.
We going dancin'.
It's 3:00 in the morning.
Fuck dancing.
Let's just go home.
Dude, Willie's right.
Come on, let's go.
Let's get out of here.
Shut up! If you guys
wanna go home, then go home!
This is my moment!
I'm the one that's upset here.
My girlfriend leaves me,
my car gets wrecked.
I'm the one that needs
my friends to console me.
This is my moment. Mine.
Would y'all
give me my fuckin' moment...
without one stupid fight?
He's right. He's right.
This is Tommy's moment.
We forgot about that.
He's the guy
who's feelin' all depressed.
He's the guy who's feelin'
all bad and shit...
and we're over here thinkin'
about what we wanted.
We should want to do
whatever Tommy wants to do.
I guess so.
Sure, man.
Tommy, Tommy...
Come here.
What?
You're right.
This is your moment.
Whatever you want to do.
What do you want to do?
You want to go home
to an empty bed...
feelin' sorry for yourself,
all miserable...
depressed?
Or you wanna go out to a club,
meet a new girl...
fuck the shit out of her...
and forget about Vanessa's
stink hole ass?
What do you wanna do?
I wanna get me some pussy.
What's happening?
What's the cover charge tonight?
- All of you guys are together?
- We're together.
I wanna see three pieces of I.D.
from everybody.
Three pieces of I.D.?
Who carries 3 pieces of I.D.?
Word, man.
We got busted by the cops.
We didn't need
but one piece of I.D.
Alright, look, fellas.
You're blockin' the door.
Now please leave.
This is racist bullshit!
I might have three pieces
of I.D. What do you guys have?
You can have a signed statement
from God.
You're not gettin'
in this place tonight.
Let's see. I got three pieces
of I.D. right here.
You want to check 'em out?
None of those are valid I.D.
What are you talkin' about,
they're not valid?
They're valid.
This is racist fuckin' bullshit.
- Come on. Let's go.
- I'm not gonna stand for this.
I'm not going for this no more.
This is fuckin' racist bullshit!
You better put this dog back
on his leash before I hurt him.
Fuck you and your fuckin' club!
I'm organising a rally...
and I'm fuckin' callin'
Al Sharpton tomorrow!
Get the hell outta here.
Get him outta here, will you?
I'm organising a rally!
I'm marchin'!
I'm marchin' all over
your fuckin' head!
- Get off me, man!
- Take it easy, bro!
I'm serious. I'm calling
Fat-ass Al right now.
- Where's the phone?
- Yo, chill out, man.
Somebody give me a quarter.
I ain't got no money.
Psst!
Come here, man.
Come on.
You guys want to get
into the club tonight?
Yeah.
I can get you in.
I know a way.
Oh, yeah? How?
It'll cost you $5.00 apiece.
Come on, guys. Let's go.
It'll cost you eighteen
at the door, my brother.
And that's
if they let you in at all.
But how can we be sure
that your way's gonna work?
I give back your money.
I'm not a crook.
Just a businessman.
Everybody, give up five.
Fellas...
I hear you. I got it.
Let's go party.
Come on.
Now, what is this?
You guys want to get in or not?
Yeah.
Damn. Look at all this rust.
Man.
Go ahead.
- In there?
- Go ahead in there.
Where's the Rasta man?
I don't know.
I hear some music. Hold on.
You hear it?
Come on.
Alright!
Word, man.
Let's have a good time.
Fuck a good time.
I want some pussy.
Let's have fun this time.
Yo, man, fuck fun.
I want some pussy.
That's my boy.
Come on. Let's go.
Excuse me.
I was just standing
right over there.
I took one look at you...
and I thought,
"What a beautiful woman"...
but it was more than that.
It was style.
You're looking
quite lovely tonight.
Would you care to dance?
No, thank you.
And I'm thinking
you're the only person...
that I'd even waste my time
talking to.
Because beauty is anybody,
but style is--
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I was just standing
right over there...
and I took one look at you,
and I...
Would you like to join me
in a dance, sweetheart?
No, thank you.
A screwdriver,
and I want a Tom Collins.
Fifteen dollars.
Excuse me?
Fifteen dollars.
Fifteen dollars for two drinks?
Damn. What do they put in there?
Diamonds and shit?
You want the drinks or not?
How do you expect a poor man
to pay for drinks like this?
That's class discrimination.
That's appropriate.
You look like you have no class.
I guess you think
I want to dance with you.
Guess what, big head,
I wouldn't dance with you...
even if you didn't look like
a sabre-toothed tiger, bitch!
What do you think about that?
Shit. Fuckin' movie star.
Now you know
you gotta give me a dance.
Sure. Love to.
Come on.
OK, bye.
Rasta man.
What's happenin'?
How you doin', man?
Not too good. I was hoping
I could get my car back...
so I could drive
the fellows home tonight.
Well, where you live?
Go!
Get 'em! Yeah!
Get it, Vinny!
Motherfucker!
- Get off her.
- Get out of here.
What the fuck you doing?
What the fuck
is the matter with you?
You want me to kick your ass
or what?
Come on! Kick my fuckin' ass!
What are you doing?
What the fuck am I doing?
What the fuck are you doing?
What are you talking about?
You don't own me!
What the fuck
is the matter with you?
You want me to kick your ass,
motherfucker?
Fuck you, man! Fuck all of you!
You motherfucker!
Come on. Get off me, man!
You know who's responsible
for this?
I said get the fuck off me!
- Cool out!
- Get off me!
I ain't lettin' you go
till you calm the fuck down.
- Chill out!
- Alright. I'm OK.
You alright?
I'm fine. Let me go.
I'm OK. Thanks a lot.
I'm alright. Thanks.
Johnny, come here.
Hey, come here.
Stay away from me.
I'm not playin' with you.
What was that shit all about?
I'm talkin' to you, bro!
What was that all about?
I'm talkin' to you!
The girl you were dancing with?
That's the girl I'm crazy about!
She's the girl I cared about.
Leave me the fuck alone.
I'm really angry.
Leave me the fuck alone.
That's the girl
you were crazy about?
Fuckin' girl
works for X-rated movies.
You can see her fuckin' guys
for twenty-five cents.
Least she could do
is charge a full dollar!
Why don't you go back
and dance with her?
I don't need her.
You can have her.
Leave me the fuck alone!
Now you saying that shit after
you fucked up my whole night!
Why don't we just take
the whole fuckin' night...
and keep recycling that shit
over and over again!
Don't mean nothin' to you.
'Cause I deserve
a lot fuckin' better...
but you don't, motherfucker!
I'll tell you what you deserve,
motherfucker.
Get off me, man!
What you deserve
is a fuckin' kick in the ass.
Who the fuck
do you think you are?
What? Do you think
you're better than me?
You're just
a fuckin' piece of shit!
You're just like
the fuckin' rest of us, man.
You're just
a fuckin' piece of shit!
- What are you afraid of?
- Not you, Fernando!
You motherfucker. Come here!
Ten dollars, my brother.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can't believe
Johnny and Vinny...
just left us in that club
all by ourselves.
- What's happenin'?
- What's up?
Yo, fellas, what'll it be?
Let me get a ham and egg
on a roll.
Make that to go.
I'll have a...
Yo, Tom, man...
You know.
I don't know. What?
You not gonna put me down?
Didn't you just see me
give the Rasta ten dollars?
You didn't put nothing in that.
I've been paying
for shit for you all night.
You got it, you got it.
How do you think I get it?
I work for it!
So what you saying?
You want me to go work
for the white man?
You think the white man's
the only man hiring?
You give me no consideration.
I gotta pay rent.
I gotta get my damn car fixed.
I'm an actor.
I gotta get my head shots.
I can't afford to be
paying for you every week.
I suggest you forget
about that actin' shit...
'cause you ain't got
no real talent anyway.
With that money you could
buy me an egg sandwich.
What kind of shit
is that to say?
What kind of friend are you?
You hang out with me
just to bum money...
then you tell me I can't act?
You and Vinny are nothing
but a bunch of users.
Who needs this shit?
Fuck all y'all.
Who needs a friend like you?
You need a friend like me...
so I can teach you
how to be a real black man.
'Cause I knew your name
was Tom for a reason.
You are just a bum,
a fuckin' bum.
I'm sick and tired
of your phoney militant ass.
I'm sick of Vinny's
fuckin' put-downs.
And if Johnny wants to be
my friend, that's fine.
But if he doesn't,
then fuck him, too.
'Cause I'm a grown man.
I can stand on my own two feet.
Fuckin' bum!
I'm a bum? Fuck you
and your fake actor bullshit!
Let me tell you something.
I'm gonna fuckin' make it.
You hear me?
I'm gonna make it.
And if by some small chance
I don't make it...
then I'm gonna die trying.
Which is more than I can say
about anything...
you've ever done
in your life, motherfucker.
Fuck you!
You ain't gonna make shit!
Just a piece of shit
like the rest of us!
Shit!
Excuse me.
Yo, yo, baby, come here.
I want to talk to you
for a second.
You're lookin'
mighty good this morning...
but it's more than that.
You know what you got?
You got style. Really.
I mean,
even your dog's got style.
See, that's why
I wouldn't bother to talk...
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