HOUBA! On the Trail of the Marsupilami (2012) - full transcript

♪Translated by♪ XQ2☻♥

[HOUBA! On the Trail of the Marsupilami]

- Kiki, down!
- Wait, wait.

Help!

Argh.

Help!

What's wrong sweety?

My parrot is sick, he's gonna die.

I'm, not at all, well.

Did you bring him there?

I don't have any money.



Arghh... Oh...

- We're here about the
girl's parrot. - Hmm!

Pulse is at 15.

He has a dry throat,

and stiff wings.
It's rhinopharyngitis.

- What nonsense! - I'll give him
beak to mouth. - No!

Easy, I'm a bird!☻

We're losing him!

Con man!

- (Stop that, now)
- Impostor!

The reflex-o is not bad-o.

It's an attack of asthma!

Souffling! Again, again!
We are en train de losing the flight! [FRENGLISH]

Souffling!



Not in there...

(Up your butt) Voila!

(Get up)

Animals adore me!

- 5,000 palombos.
- How much?

5,000, that's 50 1,000 bills.

80, 90, 100!

100 Cassandra, good job!

When will you buy me notebooks,
papa? - Soon, sweety.

You said, two more tourists

- and then you'd buy them.
- Anything you need, I'll buy.

So, now, will you buy me notebooks?

Patchoulito, stop coloring
your brother, I told you before!

So, when will you buy them?

Stop, el ninos.
Stop running around, stoppado!

will you buy me notebooks, papa?

Papa, when will you buy
my notebooks?

Cassandra, stop!

I have to pay back that son of a pollo
(chicken), Mateo. - You're just a liar!

I'm not a liar!

Yes, you lie all the time.

You lie about the Marsupilami.

About my notebooks.
You lie all the time!

It exists!

I have proof, you wanna see?

Well, yeah!

THAT, is its bitemark.

Look.

My ball signed by
Andreo Franquino,

greatest baseball player
in all Chiquito!

My ball which tha son-of-a-pollo
Mateo threw in the forest,

on a tiny little branch.

That day the river was
infested with piranhas.

To get it, I had to move
delicately, step by step.

Then, I lose my balance I slip and...

The Marsupilami saved your life,
we know, papa.

Mythomaniac!

Go play.

I've never seen this in my life.

In 16 years of journalism, never.

I've been around,
I've interviewed the greatest

I was in all the war fronts
and I've never seen this.

I'm in my office
working on my Best-of,

guys burst in, and start
hauling out all my stuff,

my archived footage.
16 years' worth of journalism.

Do you know who you're talking to?
Hello, Dan Geraldo!

So, Clarisse, may I know why

I must work in such conditions?

Dan, let's not lie to each other.

We evaluate the least profitable
programs on our network,

and you're in the top 5.
So we're a bit concerned.

So?

So, either you react,
or we stop.

Stop? Meaning?

Either next Tuesday's broadcast
is a hit, or you hit the road.

I can't be any clearer.

Here's what I propose for
next Tuesday's live show.

Because you're the most
beautiful flower,

Loreins presents...

On next Tuesday's 'V8', Dan Geraldo
goes back out in the field.

16 years ago, he risked his life in Palombia.

Dan Geraldo, in the heart of
Palombia's tropical forest.

War is on the rampage.

Today, he's off again.
His weapon: a V8 camera.

His mission:
penetrate the secret of the Payas.

Legends tell of the Payas
living over 200 years:

myth or reality?

What was the secret
of their longevity?

Can one live eternally?

Next Tuesday's 'V8',
live from Chiquito.

Dan Geraldo faces the Payas:

the tribe which defies time.

With Loreins.

Loreins, to be 16 years old,
all your life.

The 'Loreins' logo, should be bigger,
they need to see it's our sponsor.

But, it's in the right sprit, OK.

So, what you're saying is,
I'm going to Palombia?

You have a rendez-vous with
Pablito Camaron, your guide.

Specialist of the jungle
and of Paya culture.

Which one is he? Left or right?

Very amusing, Dan. Meanwhile,
I advise you to do as he says.

He's in contact with the Paya chief
and better yet,

he got us an interview.

Fine, it'll be your scoop.
My son did it once, he can do it again.

And since you won't be back
by next Tuesday,

you'll broadcast, direct from
Palombian TV.

Plane ticket, roadmap,
you leave tomorrow morning.

But... That means?...

I'll call you back.

Hey, Mateo!

- Wanna drink something?
- Cafe con leche. - All right!

Watch the shirt!

Is that a new tattoo?
Aren't there 2 l's in Kill?

*K-I-L-L, no?

What does he owe, so far?

160,000 palombos.

That's quite a few thousands
of palombos.

No! No! No!

- My Kiki!
- Leave him alone,

he's got nothing to do with this!

- Why me?
- Listen...

I'll pay you back,
I swear, Mateo, I'll pay you.

Give me some time, I have a plan.

What? The Marsupilami?

Lemme go, you're hurting me!

- The'll kill my Kiki!
- No one'll kill Kiki.

- Mateo!
- 160,000 palombos!

- When? - Tuesday!
- Tuesday?

Raccalo? Are you screwing me around?

I've been waiting an hour
for your call.

I don't care.
I need that money.

What time will the 'pigeon' land?

Voila! Back to Chiquito.

Has it changed a lot
since you were here last?

A bit. Not too much.

OK, I'll find our contact,
you'll get the baggage?

Full of himself, isn't he!

General Pochero wants to see you.

No, in fact, 'cause... So

I have a rendez-vous
with Pablito Camaron.

He bored me with his
explanations. Allez.

Naranja de tu madre!
(Your mother's orange!)

- Petunia!
- Yes?

- Petunia, wait for me!
- I'm waiting.

You won't go to your grave sooner.
- I'm here, professor, waiting.

Meanwhile I have 40 extra kilos
on my back.

We'll see when you have
40 extra YEARS.

Fine. We'll see.

What was the level
of iridium last time?

It was...

It was, precisely here,

at the same time,
between 6.2 et 6.3, professor.

Very good.

Petunia, a good botanist
needs to be precise.

It's enraging to go on retirement

without knowing which plant
releases so much iridium.

That's tomorrow, you'll find out
tonight, professor.

The solution won't drop
out of the sky.

- I'd say a maxillaria.
- No.

No, Petunia!

Petunia, I've studied all the orchids.

I've never seen this species.

Me, Hermoso,

I've discovered an unknown
orchid!

Hugs 'n kisses!

Easy... watch where you
put your hands!

♪ If you discovered a new orchid,
say "Yes we did"

♪ Yes we did!

♪ If you discovered a new orchid,
say "Yes we did"

♪ Yes we did!

♪ If you discovered a new orchid,
♪ You discovered a new orchid,

- What's that sound?
- The sound of victory, Petunia!

The sound of victory.

General, General!

I made a stunning discovery,
look.

Ah yes...
Enchante, Mademoiselle.

Not her. This!

Ah, I envy you, Hermoso.
It's lovely being a gardener.

A few flowers and you're in
seventh heaven.

I'm a botanist.

This, General, is a
new species of orchid.

- I call it Orchidus Hermorroidus.
- You're sure about that name?

Yes. Anyway, to continue
my research,

I'll need a bit of money,
because...

Ah no, I won't release any funds,
now that you're retired.

What about my experience, what?

Experience is a comb, which life
gives us after we've lost our hair.

May I remind you, General, at 20
I was a Blue Belt in Austrian Savate.

Like this.

Hermoso, I assure you.
It's time.

Garden for pleasure.

- I'm a botanist.
- Yes, but, retired.

No, Caporal,
stop it with your Dzzzt!

He made a suspect gesture, General.
I had to intervene.

But your Dzzzt, costs us a ton
of electricity.

- I never pay it but, still...
- OK, General.

I am General Pochero.
Welcome to Palombia.

Ooh! That thing gives you the jitters!

That's what I wanted to do,
TV host. But, well...

- we don't always get a choice.
- I'm a journalist, actually.

We've been dictators from father
to son. Well, I say dictator...

Elected by 99% of voters!

Look, My crew's waiting for me
at the airport and...

They can wait.
First I want to show you

a secret little spot in the palace.

It's dark in there.

I believe you like Celine?

The writer? Well, I don't really
have the time to read.

No.

Not the writer.

Wow! Ah yes, it's...

I know.

I saw your interview with
Celine in 2006. Magnifique!

Thanks. Thanks.

Her most beautiful stage dresses.

Amsterdam, 1996.

Montreal, 1999.

Sydney, 2008.

And Las Vegas, the gold and silver dress.

She's never worn it.

Beautiful, very lovely.

Say, about the handcuffs,
could you... - Hold this.

My jewel.

There's only one in the world,
it's as simple as that.

- OK Celine, take one.
- Take one.

♪ M-hmm, mmm...

♪ M-hmm, mmm...

♪ I can't wait to fly.

♪ Oh...

♪ I'm alive.

Ah, vinyl!

They sure screwed us with digital.
- Clearly.

You think it's possible for me

to meet her? Eventually.

Ah yes. I think it might be best,

to go through her manager,
or Rene.

Or Rene, yes.

♪ I'm alive.

Respect. Really.

♪ When you look at me.

Respect...

♪ I can turn.

Do something!

What are you doing?

Stop them!

That's it!

♪ I'm on fire...

Ohhh...

If it comes to that,
I can call Rene directly.

Hola.

OK, off to work. Allez.

No, no!

♪ Happy birthday, professor!

♪ Happy bir...

For 3 hours, I've been stuck here.

I'm fed up with being
old and feeble.

I'd give anything to regain
my vigor of yesteryear.

Don't take avantage of this,
to cop a feel.

- I'm not copping a feel, I'm hanging on.
- Well, hang onto something else.

Super... Voila.

♪ Ta-daa!
Happy 82nd, professor.

Go on, let's blow out the
candles and make a wish.

Well, half of it will come true.

Pretty good, already.

Petunia?

Raccalo! It's always half-assed
plans with you.

Always. Yes! ... Yes!
Where's your journalist?

That too, is a half-assed plan.

Naranja de madre mia!
Where is he?

In the palace prison?
And that's not a half-assed plan?!

Listen here grande *speculoos...

Gimme, gimme the bag!

Gimme! Call the policia!

Policia!

Policia! Policia!

Te encontro la super-viejita

Sorry. Should'a never done that.
It's ridiculous. - Eh...

Go on, scram!

You won't arrest me?
No arresta mi?

I attacked the old dame.
Yo agress-ado la dam-o!

- Arrest me!
- Beat it, go!

I know my rights. Without proof
I'm presumed guilty!

Alor-a!

Where's that son-of-a-pollo,
Pochero?

Look, up there!

Hang on!

Go get Chounino. Chounino!

Oh no, not the palace prison!

I don't wanna go in the palace prison!

- Imbecill-ito! Idiot-os!
- Shut your boca.

Nobody tells me to shut my boca.
I won't shut it!

Well, I'm telling you to
shut your boca!

Y'know what, Sneezy?

This is not your day.

You were saying?

This IS your day.

Guard, guardia-nos! Gardenia!

Dan Geraldo!

I'm Pablito Camaron,
your guide to the Payas!

Oh, yes! I recognize you
from the airport...

Well do something!

That was lame!

I regret this gesture.

I khregret ze gest.

You hit Bolo?!

- I imagine, Bolo is you?
- Yes.

What's the rest of your plan?

Aaaaahh!

Hmm?!

Fine.

Let's see how my youth serum
is coming along.

Monsieur?

This area is closed
to the public, monsieur.

Petunia.

What? Don't recognize me
with my hep look?

One: you've no right to be here,
and two: we don't say 'hep' anymore.

(What nonsense) Now, look,
monsieur, you must leave!

You smell of Encyclia.

It's nice,
my favorite orchid.

Do you know why they emit
this perfume?

To attract insects...

which pollinize the flower.

It's a *perennial epiphyte.

Which needs light shade

and high humidity.

Lots of light,

but never direct sunlight.

No, it's not right!

If we limit ourselves, only
to what's right, what then?

Hermoso might come.

Hermoso is so far,

- and yet so near.
- Yes I know, but...

That's impossible!

The effect is already dissipating.
- What effect?

Of this serum
I made from the orchid.

Why? It's not possible!

Is that you, professor?

This is disgusting.
I don't feel well!

Professor you're a genius!

You disgust me,
but you're a genius.

But you disgust me.

I need more orchids. Let's go.
- What, now?

Yes, now, in 2 hours
I might be 20 years older!

-All night, if need be. Off we go!
- You're really not cool.

Not coo?! My mother was
Hitler's cleaning lady.

You wanna talk about
an uncool boss?

Professor, in 82 years
you found ONE orchid.

- How do you intend...
- I don't know HOW!

I know WHO.

He's staring at us...

He's very fixedly staring.
Look how he fixes us.

- Lemme go.
- He's fixing us.

He's fixing you.

- Ah no... us.
- He's fixing us.

- It's us, he's fixing.
- Shh!

You're talking too loud,
you'll make him mad.

Louder, I can't hear a thing.

I've got a live show next Tuesday,
get me outta here.

- Forget it. You'll be here, Tuesday.
- I'll make it worth your while.

- 160,000 palombos.
- How much in euros?

- I dunno how much it is.
- OK, OK!

What's your plan?

Chounino.

On the desk, Chounino.

The drawer.

What're you doing?
In the drawer.

Look in the drawer.
The drawer! No.

Chounino, above!
No, under!

Chounino!

The key with little balloons.
Bravo, Chounino!

Bravo, Chounino!

Give me the key! Chounino.

Da-me la key-tos.
Chounino, the key-tos.

Gimme the key, Chounino. Stop.

I owe you two smwicks?

I'll give you four if you
gimme the key-tos.

Ok, 5! 5 smwicks.
I'll give you 5.

You're negociating
with an otter, is that it?

It's not an otter,
It's a coati.

Chounino, listen to me.

I'll give you 6 smwicks,
and no more.

Voila, good, little coati!

Animals adore me.

We can't stay here!

- Hello? - Attaboy, the crew
thinks you're real classy,

with that limousine stunt
at the airport!

Do you call that reporting
without theatrics?

Not at all,
I just got outta jail!

Papa, I've almost no coins left.

I have a new contact
for the Payas.

I simply need 160,000 palombos.

Ask Clarisse. For 20 years,
I've pulled strings,

and you strut around in a limousine?

Here's what you'll get: ZERO!

OK, super.

OK, it's done. They'll deposit
it in your account.

That's my account.

I want cash, right away,
or I won't budge.

No, when I get the interview
with the Paya.

I want an advance.

- I want an invoice.
- Invoice?

Shall I put Value Added Tax
on your invoice, or what?

Aah!

- It was a cat.
- I know.

I'm leery of squeaky voices, now.

Vamonos.

I'm sailing on a makeshift pirogue,

towards the frightening
territory of the Payas.

My guide: Pablito Camaron.

Puny, malnourished,
probably illiterate...

I can hear you at this distance.

From Palombia, I'm Dan Geraldo
for V8, in the hell of the Payas.

I did it all with this,
including my first report from Palombia.

- Which region? Couchombakita?
- Couchombakita, yes.

Are you married? Any kids?

No, it's difficult enough
in Chiquito to feed one mouth.

True, you're rather far from
our western standards. - Shh!

- They're approaching.
- Yes, and?

You've heard of the
Paya rituals? - Yes.

You know what they did to prisoners?

They buried them alive
and ate their tongues.

You look pretty relaxed
for a guy who knows.

Let's arrange a signal.

An animal sound
if we get separated.

Ok. I can do a good duck.

Quack! Quack, quack!

No, wait...

Quack, quack!

Qurrrk! Voila.

You try. Qurrrk!

A duck, in a jungle?!
Nothing odd about that?

The best way to get spotted
is to do a duck in the jungle.

We need an animal that melts into
the background. The yaki, for example.

Couic! Bwkouic!

Mbwouic! Mbrrrwic!

Your mouth's fine,
The jerkiness, is fine.

As if you're swallowing your tongue.
Bwkouic! Bwkouic!

Bwrr... khh!

My tongue! My tongue.

Spit it out!

I don't see why we don't
keep the duck, it was fine.

It's OK, OK.

There's some kind of animals in here!

I'm fine!

Always walk behind me.

I've been around the block.
Don't worry,

I know my way around a jungle.

Watch the branch.

Do you know the legend of
the Parsley-ami? - Marsupilami.

- Marble-salami.
- Marsupilami.

Say it right, or I'll get mad.

- Mercy-pull-on-me.
- Marsupilami.

Keep the MAR, remove the PULL,
and add SUPILAMI at the end.

The Payas.

Wh.. what...

I need to go alone, to scout around.

Any problem...
you know the signal.

- Can you see me?
- No... Hey?!

Just to be sure.

This guy's sick in the head.

Count to eight thousand.

Eight thousand?

One, two, three...

24, 25, 26,

27, 28, 29

60, 61, 62

126, 127,

128, 129

130, 131

426, 427,

428, 429,

602, 603, 604,

605, 606, 607

4,226,

4,227...

- Twnety-seven!
- What?

Quack, quack?

Houba!

Great Paya chief.

'Mustache' gracias.

Thanks for granting me this interview.

How much time do I have?

What? ... My watch?

My watch scares you?
Voila, voila, look...

Voila.

(♪ If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya.)

♪ If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya.

♪ If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya.

♪ If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya.

♪ If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya.

When it's red, it's running,

I ask questions, you answer.

You can ask three questions.

- Only three questions?
- Yes. Two questions, left.

Your immense experience
is an inspiration to us all.

Do you have a message to transmit,
to everyone listening to us?

Life is a toucan.

- Life is a toucan?
- Yes. That was your last question.

Papa, what's burning in there?

Don't touch the magic incense.

I'm going to ask you,
one last question.

How come you speak
our language so well?

I have friends in Grenoble.

How does it feel to lose
160,000 palombos?

Impostor!

Con man!

Did you think I'd fall
for your masquerade?

♪ "If you don't hop about
you're not a Paya"

Stoppado. Stoppado. Allez!

All right... a joke.

I thought you said
you had no kids.

I don't. Well, I have these kids,
but they're abandoned children.

I collect them. It's complicated.
It's like...

That's the problem with lies.

You make up one thing, then
you have to invent another,

and it gets more and more complicated!
Filthy liar!

I'm not a liar.

Life in Chiquito is complicated,
you need palombos.

OK, don't speak.

Voila. Stand like this.

This might be doable.

Go on, be a Paya.
Say something menacing.

There's a *blowpipe
aimed at your nape.

Not bad. Again, but more menacing.

There's, really, a blowpipe
aimed at your nape.

Just adding 'really'
isn't more menacing.

Ah, who's he, a cousin?

- He's a Paya. A real Paya!
- A real Paya?

You overdid his make up.
Too much paint, I think.

Me, I... Wait.

Can you hear me?
Test, test, one, two...

Me think, you: too much paint.

That stings.

Me think, you: very nice paint.

No, but seriously!

Too much paint!
Seriously?! Too much paint?

What idiot would say
such a thing?

What did you get us into?

What did YOU, you get us into?

Don't use the possessive pronoun.

No, you got us into this!

YOU got us in this mess!

If you'd taken us to the
Payas directly, we wouldn't be here!

- Actually, yes. And sooner.
- St-stop, look here...

Be quiet, quiet, that's enough.

Please save your saliva
for your next lies.

My saliva?

Take that, my saliva!

- You can't even spit.
- Oh yeah?

You can lie real good, though.
Voila; world champ.

You filthy liar.

I'm not a filthy liar!

Bonjour.

Animals adore me.

Can't deny, he digs me.

Titi!

Tchoom ooni yakchunil, affa, affa!

Lo makchuluntu loopp chikaboom pai-yaa!

Arrrh!

Chief? Mademoiselle?

Excuse me, I'm Dan Geraldo,

I'm a journalist,
and in my tribe,

I'm a very important person.
May I...

Very impressive.

As suave as John Steed
of The Avengers, I say...

What are the gonna do to us?

I don't want them to eat
my tongue.

Stop bawling! We're not on TV!

We're in the jungle, bro!

What's he up to?

No, please. Stop... Aah, ooh!

- Dan! Do something.
- Anybody?? - Daaan!

Calm down!

See, the way you move
excites him!

Stop, I don't feel well!

Try to do something!

I'll mess him up!

I'll mess you up,
you shitty little chihuahua!

Take that! Aah...

Stop, little chihuahua.

I understand completely if you
don't wanna talk about it.

Once, I had an aunt who got
stung in the ear by a wasp.

OK, I know it doesn't compare, but...

I'm simply trying to say

if you want to talk,
I'm there for you.

What are they gonna do?

Aaaahh!

Thanks.

Lole kebole.

What's happening?

- C'mere.
- Ah, no.

I'll walk, if I may.

Moxupila kotuke Chicxulub.

- Chicxulub!
- Chicxulub!

Kifelek.

We're inside a volcano?

SILENCE!

I can't breathe.

Let the prophecy commence!

For all time,

the orchid of Chicxulub
has given strength and youth

to the Paya people.

For all time, the orchid has given
life to the Marsupilami.

♪ Hou-ba, hou-ba! ...&c...

-I saw one but, surely...
- Shhh!

The Marsupilami, guardian
of the world's equilibrium.

But today, the Marsupilami
is threatened.

Because Double-face has arrived.

Double-face will steal the orchid.

and kill the forest
then our people will die.

Like in Avatar.

Only, two non-Payas can
confront Double-face.

The man with the square hand,

and the weasel with yellow feet.

Tiny Voice will recognize them,

and reveal them as the
chosen ones of the prophecy.

I don't get any of this.

The man with the square hand
and the weasel with yellow feet.

must both,
render strength and power

to the 3rd non-Paya.

The Gold and Silver Woman.

They must let the truth
burst forth,

to save the 3 treasures
in the forest.

But if they fail,

then the world will topple
into chaos.

Birds will sing off-key.

The jaguar will be eaten
by the rabbit.

- And the tree will fell the axeman.
- (axeman!)

Everything will taste of
passion fruit.

Everyone will wear their
sweater around their shoulders.

Turtles will have shoulders.

At 12 past 10,
it'll be 25 to 4.

At 20 minutes past noon,
it'll be 5:43.

At 4:15 it'll...
'K, it' not important.

(Scroll, scroll, scroll...)

Ah voila!

The volcano, El Sombrero,
will belch fire,

devasting the earth for
1,000 years and 2½ weeks.

(It's the end of the world!)

You are the chosen ones
of the Chicxulub prophecy.

CHICXULUB!

We're gods, bro!

- Chicxulub!
- CHICXULUB!

My pleasure!

Oh, a Marsupilami!
- Shh!

- Why isn't it eating?
- I dunno.

You said you'd get the same cake
as on my birthday!

- They only had passion fruit.
- Nobody likes passion fruit!

- OK...
- Shh, quiet!

Look, we can track him
with the CGPS.

That yellow dot,
is the Marsupilami.

- Crazy gizmo you got there!
- I even have the Beastly-Planet App.

To see which species are
disappearing, in real time.

- Oh, yeah! Super! - There, look at that,
the Brasilian Blue Ant, for example.

1587, 1266,

122, 8.
Poof, gone!

- No more Brasilian Blue Ant.
- Damn fine gadget!

Ah, the pandas, there are
still quite a few left!

They're going like hotcakes.

What exactly do you intend to do
with the Marsupilami?

Capture it to gather orchids.
For my serum.

Professor, I put up with your
quirks and lewd comments

because you're a brilliant botanist,
and I chose to learn from you,

not a bimbo who powders
his face every 5 minutes,

or worse, with a vulgar poacher
who captures animals

- in danger of disappearing.
- Oh-la! What a long phrase.

The Marsupilami
has yet to appear, Petunia.

Whether it disappears or not,
changes nothing.

I don't know you anymore, professor.

This squirrel will lead us
to his cache of nuts.

Negative, General, it's not
a squirrel, it's a Marsupilami.

- That was a metaphor.
- What's that, a female?

Caporal, who is this man?

Start the clock! I was born
82 years ago in Bredzelburg, Austria,

I arrived en Palombia
at the age of 5, botanist,

treated like a dog by Pochero jr.
and senior, for years!

All if a sudden I'm 50 years younger
so I'm no longer retiring,

mmy name means "Beautiful" in Spanish.

- I am?
- (Hermoso.)

Hermoso, it was an easy one, c'mon!

Hermoso, the gardener?

Botanist!

No. General.

♪ Houba, houba, houba ...&c...

Crazy thing is, I originally
came because of you.

To interview the Payas.
I said to myself: Gilles...

Hang on, my name's not Gilles!
I said to myself: Dan!

How are you gonna manage it,
you don't speak Paya?

And paf! You speak our language.

I speak all languages.

In 249 years, I've had
the time to learn them.

You don't look it, at all.

- What's your name?
- Payette. - Payette!

- We're gods, what!
- Taste.

Me-dammit, Me-dammit!

- Eat.
- Oh, really, last one.

Hello, hand!

Hey... Hey!

Go ahead, knock yourself out.

♪ Aaaa..

♪ ...

Dan, don't eat it, the Payas
are trying to drug us!

Pardon, my mistake.

Dan, don't eat it, the Payas
are trying to drug us!

They're gonna *... Dan!

♪ Tacali ke bil Xulub tebila

♪ Houba te so ne houba

♪ tien dale ti hafta buli

♪ hamma bayil ne so ne houba

♪ Tacali ke bil Xulub tebila

♪ Houba te so ne houba

♪ tien dale ti hafta buli

♪ hamma bayil ne so ne houba

Houba kisen Paya Chicxulub!

Oh, it's all so clear!

The creation of the world,
the cosmos...

The world must absolutely know that...

Houba.

- Ah?...
- Stop shouting.

They drugged us, those Payas.

Feels like a tooth is
growing into my palate.

Where are we?

C'mon, where?

I don't know this part
of the jungle.

Waddaya mean, you don't know?

We're lost, is that what
you're saying, huh?

We're lost, we're lost.
Is that it? We're lost?

Stop speaking.

I'm trying to remember
what the prophecy said.

- The non-Payas...
- The prophecy?

Who gives a damn about the prophecy!
I wanna go home.

I'm a celebrity.
Get me out of here!

"Get me out of here?!"
Who fulfilled his part of the contract?

You wanted to see the Payas,
You SAW the Payas.

My 160,000 palombos!

Your 160,000 palombos?

Your 160,000 palombos were to get me
an interview with the Paya chief.

There was no interview.

So, I'll never give you
160,000 palombos!

If you don't pay me,
I swear, I'll massacre you.

- NEVER!
- OK. Terminado, basta!

Yeah, see ya! I prefer being alone
to being with a filthy liar!

I'm not a filthy...

liar!

You're lucky I have no strength.

- Hey!
- Dang you devil.

That's right. Go on, go!

I'll do just fine without...

Aaaaahh!...

When the volcano spills out
all its guts,

he won't be so cocky.

We're in the prophecy,
that's for sure.

The weasel with yellow feet, is me.
I have yellow feet, I'm a weasel.

The man with the square hand is him,
can't he see it, or what?

Houba!

No!

Wait, wait.

Wait!

These things happen...

Get him!

Where is he?

Carlos, Carlos,, Carlos!

No, the other Carlos!

Gimme that!

- Sorry, Carlos.
- No, it' OK,it's nothing.

No, the other one!

- Yes!
- Guys, there's moles.

- There!
- I say, 'there'.

There!

I don't see a thing.

- What?
- No, no, nothing.

Double-face.

Restrain that vermin!

I want my orchids.

The prophecy.

Is the rifle broken?

Let me do it.

Game over!

(No!)

Voila!

Put him there.

- An orchid, is that all?
- No, it's not all.

That's why you need this.

Finally we have something
in common.

With orchid... Without orchid.

Since without these flowers,
your eggs die, let me propose a deal.

If I keep this,

you'll need to get more
of these for that.

And if I keep all those others

you'll need to go get
even more of those.

Not these, but those, for you.

Well, for me. That's that.

Interested in the job?

I'll take that for a yes.

Nobody move!
Put down the carabine!

Easy! Easy!
Easy-amente!

There, you see, I'm unarmed.

The egg! Put down the egg!

- Don't listen to him General.
- Put this egg now!

- Back off!
- Leave him to me, General.

Stop! - You're afraid!
- I'm not afraid!

You fart fear!

- You fart fear!
- I'm a crazy man!

- You won't shoot!
- I'll shoot!

You'll shoot? - Yes!
- Shoot me right here!

He's credible. He's credible.

- Stand beside him!
- Do as he says. - Move!

Piggyback each other!

No, that's not even close. Voila.

Hands against the wall!

- There's no wall...
- I don't give a damn!

Hands behind your head!
Elbows in tight!

Do the bobsleigh!

Full speed schushh!

We're gonna die, my life's
passing before my eyes.

What did you do to him?

Nothing.

From now on, you do exactly as I say.

Aaaahh...

I know him. He's the journalist.

Problem?

Solution.

I'm split on that

Because your skin's youth
begins in infancy,

Loreins has created "Baby Skin".

The first facial care
for nursing infants.

Loreins, to be 16 months old,
all your life.

Clarisse, I found this
while moving Dan's files.

I think you should take a look.

Lemme go!

*Not to catch-os! Not to catch-os!
Not to catch-os!

You'll need more than a racoon
to get outta here.

- It's a coati.
- A racoon.

- It's a coati. - No, a racoon.
- It's a coati. - No, a racoon.

- It's a coati.
- No, I told you, it's a racoon.

- It's a coati.
- No, racoon.

- I swiped this from the guard.
- What for?

You're General Pochero,
leader of Palombia.

You must know a way to get us
outta here?

I'm no longer General Pochero.
There's no General Pochero!

I don't even know the Palace
phone number!

I just wanted to listen quietly
to Celine Dion.

I didn't want any of this,
piss off, lemme alone!

And gimme my 'iPoud'!

Ingrate!

My 'iPoud'!

Myon 'iPoud', it's broken!

Leave it to the press.

Clarisse. Thank god!

Ok, listen carefully because
I have very little time.

I'm stuck in prison
in Pochero's Palace.

Liar. Filth!

Fraud! Mythomaniac! Impostor!

- Are you nuts? calling me that!
- Open wide your ears.

This is Chiquito, for V8.

Dan Geraldo in the heart of
Palombia's tropical forest.

Here, in this
inextricable jungle... whoops!

Danny-pooh, come and eat.
We're having meatballs!

Dan Geraldo: media hero,

in the heart of Palombia's
tropical forest.

Here, war is on the rampage.

Watch out aunty,
it's gonna get a bit noisy!

What is all that noise?

- You OK, aunty?
- What're you doing?

Everything OK?

That was the 5th take.
There are twelve.

Clarisse, I can explain.

Dan, I advise you to be
on time for the live show.

With a scoop.
If not, I have one

which I won't hesitate
to broadcast. Is that clear?

See you in 19 minutes.

- Oh, no.
- What?

If I'm not on air in 19 minutes
with a scoop,

she'll broadcast my report.

What report?

I made a fake report.

I've never been to Palombia
nor Couchombakita!

I know, Couchombakita
is a soccer player.

Right away, I saw you were
a mythomaniac.

I'm gonna do something which
annoys me profoundly.

But, I'm gonna save your neck.

I your washing machine,
'camera',

I have... Listen carefully.

Better than that!

I filmed the Marsupilami.

Hmm.

Is that all you have to say? Hmm?

I'm talking about the discovery
of a new species.

An animal no one thought existed
but it does exist!

An egg-laying mammal. Yellow and black
half leopard, half koala,

with a cute gerbil face,
and 8 metre tail!

That's a scoop!

What, you need a cool drink?

You have, in this camera,
the means to show the whole world,

that I'm not a liar,
and you're a real journalist!

A real journalist.

- A scoop.
- A scoop!

In my camera.

Yes, OK, let's go!

Yes! Yes! You're right,
Pablito, we can get out of this mess.

Ok, let's get organised.

My live show is in...
My watch is broken.

Ok, let's get organised.

There, a wall.

Here, bars. There, guards.

You... you're of no use.

Voila. It is possible.
It's crazy but it could work.

Pablito, I have an idea.
Hey, gringos! Aaahh!

What's the rest of your plan?

- Did it work?
- As you can see. What now?

- Are we outside?
- Practically.

General. Shake it off.

You're our only way out of here.

I beg you, make an effort.
We have very little time.

Think, there must be a way.

Your ancestors must have left,
I dunno,

a secret passage,
a tunnel and stuff...

- General, may I ask a question?
- Yes.

- Forget him, he's out of it.
- What would Celine do?

Always defended animal rights,
hasn't she, Celine? - Yes.

She sleeps with her labrador.

- And her rat.
- with her rat.

Would she have left a
Marsupilami in the lurch?

Let him get massacred
and do nothing? - No.

- Is the Marsupilami cute?
- Very... Very cute.

What would Celine have done?

Celine...

Why didn't you say there's
a secret passage?

Because it's secret.

I like it.

What about me, how do I look?

- Young.
- Young.

Perfect. Put them up, all over.

How are you doing in there?

If I can make plants grow faster,

it'll work with animals too.

Maybe even with humans.

OK, one thing at a time.

- What're you doing, Petunia?
- What am I doing?

I'm leaving you to your new life.

- Exploiter of the Marsu.
- Exploiter of the Marsu?!

Such big words all of a sudden.

Nowadays, who succeeds
without exploiting nature?

You... Before.

That's all over!
I gave my whole life to flowers.

What did I get in exchange?
Nothing!

Time for the flowers
to give me something, now.

And, Loreins is giving me
a pile of dough for the

Hermorrhoid Anti-wrinkle Cream
with my serum!

I may not have legs up to my armpits,
but I have a conscience.

- Petunia, come back here.
- Never!

So, Caporal, all set?

Have you trained the Marsupilami
to fetch orchids?

No, General, he won't do a thing.
He's a real savage beast.

He was always a savage beast,
but now, even more.

I'm sure these three
will be easier to train.

- For the moment, they're not ready.
- Well, they're eggs.

Go put them in a safe place.

General, what do we do about
the Marsupilami?

Do whatever you want.

Fine, I will do what I want.

Shall we take a shower, huh girls?

I have neutral PH soap.

Young!

The Marsupilami's eggs!

- With tiny Marsupilamis inside?
- Exactamente.

And there's my camera.

What do we do? If we recover it
we have a scoop. So... well?

OK, how many soldiers?

No idea. A hundred or so.

A hundred?
I propose a siesta.

No, we must absolutely
save those eggs.

I'll cause a diversion.
You hurry.

You won't have much time
after my signal. - How long?

3 minutes 31, maximum.

What signal?

♪ Hmm-mmm, mmm

♪ Hmm-mmm, mmm

♪ I get wings to fly,

♪ oh,

♪ I'm alive

♪ Yeah, yeah.

♪ When you call for me

♪ When I hear your breathe

♪ I get wings to fly

♪ I feel that I'm alive

♪ When you look at me

♪ I can touch the sky

♪ I know that I'm alive

Oh!

C'mon guys! This is huge!

Go in, I'll cover you. - OK.
(♪ When you bless the day)

♪ I just drift away

Think of pleasant colors.
- You covering me? - Aahh!

♪ All my worries die

♪ I'm glad that I'm alive

♪ You've set my heart on fire

♪ Filled me with love

♪ Made me a woman

♪ on clouds above

♪ I couldn't get much higher

♪ My spirit takes flight

♪ 'Cause I'm alive

♪ Oh owoah

♪ When you call on me

♪ When I hear you breathe

The camera!

No, it's mine, it's mine!

♪ I'm alive
♪ I am alive

The eggs!

(♪ When you reach for me)

Easy! Easy.

♪ Loves knows that

Hurry, hurry!

♪ That I'll be the one standing by

♪ Through good and through
trying times

♪ And it’s only begun

♪ I can't wait for the
rest of my life

The Gold and Silver Woman!

The third non-Paya.
We're in the prophecy.

He's saying exactly the
same thing, at the same time.

Go ahead... No, you.

♪ When you blessed, you blessed the day

♪ I just drift away

♪ I know that I am alive, yeah

♪ I get wings to fly
- (I get wings to fly)

♪ God knows that

♪ I'm alive.

So, little Marsu...

You're so cute, with your
yellow and black fur.

Huh? Too cute!

You're all so cute,
you little animals!

You wreck the lives of couples
but it's not your fault.

Because you're cute,
little animals.

Well, you can keep your cat!

Go on, leave with Fluffles!

Because Fluffles is cuter
than me!

Well, YOU'RE gonna pay for it.

You have a drool stain.

A spit spot!

It doesn't usually do this.

Nice monkey...

Should we do something?

You're adorable.

I really must go and change. Merci.

Later. Merci, Merci.

Rest, now!

Rest!

- On air in 2 minutes.
- Go on, keep at it!

Chiquito, for live feed.

♪ (Yodeladi yodeli)

Hello?

The metaphor has escaped.

With my eggs?
With my eggs!

My eggs...

Man this is crazy!
The Paya lady was right.

General Pochero is
The Gold and Silver Woman

The man with the square hand
is you.

How far are we from TV Palombia?

Do you realize we're in
the prophecy, or not?

If we fail, El Sombrero
will belch fire for 1000 years!

Talk about hot water!
1000 years of fire. Hello!

We're in the prophecy,
I dunno if you realize!

Don't scoff at the prophecy!

When El Sombrero belches its fire on you,
you won't be so cocky.

- How far?
- 5 minutes.

Let's go get the kids,
its not far.

- No! Out of the question!
- Out of the question?

I want my kids to see that!

For 25 years they've called me a liar.
How much longer? Enough!

The eldest is 12.
What're you talking about?

Chiquito, here. Are you
receiving me, control room? Hello?

Control room for Chiquito.
Hello?

Are you receiving me,
control room?

Yes, we're receiving you, Chiquito.
Hold it there!

- Drop me off there.
- Where? - There, there!

Where is it?
Where is it?

Back on the right,
and straight left all the way!

- Fascist.
- He can say a lot of things!

Watch the knife.

You're cowards for picking on
guys smaller than you.

Bwaarrkk!

You got the money, papa?

No... yes... No, soon!

You'll never get it.
They're gonna kill Kiki!

No one will kill Kiki,
because of me. Trust me.

On this cassette,
we filmed the Marsupilami.

When Dan broadcasts it on TV,
everyone'll see, I'm not a li...

Ya, Ganja!

This triple concentrated serum

will give me absolute power.

I'm a *... ayy

"Calle de naranja"
(Orange street)

"Calle de naranja"...

I love driving.

I really must get my license.

You're not moving at all, Ganja.

I never told you '10 smwicks'!

I'm not a liar!

Dan can't have disappeared!

We're covered, I have another
scoop just in case.

- What scoop?
- Live in 24 seconds.

Good evening and welcome to
this special edition of V8.

Dan Geraldo won't be long, I hope,

in joining us live
from Chiquito, Palombia.

Dan's not here yet.

Meanwhile, I suggest you watch
this first scoop,

a report he made

exactly 16 years ago.

Dan Geraldo was in Palombia...

Wait! I'm here!

- This way?
- Wait, wait, he's coming!

- This way? Where?
- It's fine, he's here.

It's OK, I'm here!

- Do we have sound?
- You'll have it in 2 seconds.

Dan, good evening.

Good evening.

Could you explain the state you're in?
- Is he injured?

Clarisse, I must say a word
to my father, first.

Papa, all I've done
up to the present,

was so you'd be proud of me.

But, I must confess,

I faked my first report
in Palombia.

I never went to Palombia.

I filmed it in aunt Gaby's garden.

Alone, with my V8.

- I... you...as expl...sth...
- The sound.

The sound!

...Bolo, who caught us.

(Russian)

Can I get the sound which
corresponds with the image?

(The beavers will build a dam.)

(See how they fidget.)

(Little fidgety beavers!)

I just wanna tell you, papa,
today I'm really in Palombia.

- Above all I have a real scoop.
- (communication is back)

My first scoop
as a real journalist.

Can I get a plug for my V8?

At the foot of the volcano,
El Sombrero,

in Paya territory,
is an immense...

Palombian forest.

And here, this extraordinary,
little creature has chosen to live.

An animal which everyone
thought did not exist,

but it does exist.

I'm talking about the discovery
of a new species,

the Marsupilami.

Why 'No tape'?

Where's the cassette? Why is there
no cassette? Where's the cassette?

There was a cassette. Wait, huh?
- We're waiting.

Wait. We were captured
by the Payas...

Excuse me, I knocked it down.

Who's this guy?

- The scoop!
- The cassette, here's the cassette.

Dan, you are joined by?...
- Yes. - By?... - Pablito.

Hey kids, we're on live.
Watch what's coming up!

An exclusive for V8,

the one and only,
'Images of the Marsupilami'.

Watch.

- That's me when I...
- No, wait! (You be a Paya.)

(Say something menacing.)

- That's when the...
- No! Wait.

Clarisse, Clarisse, it's...

A fake interview with
a Paya chief. - No, Clarisse.

It's not cued at the right spot.
Gimme 2 seconds.

Skip forward, Fast forward-skip.

No, not the red!
Not the red!

Why did you press the red!
You've just...

I didn't press red,
I pressed REC.

He erased the scoop.

If I press REC, how can I
erase the scoop?

- REC, is erase!
- How annoying.

Clarisse, yes... he filmed
a Marsupilami. Look.

Voila! These are Marsupilami eggs.
It's an oviparous mammal.

- Like a platypus, except yellow.
- Voila! - Like that! - Voila!

With extraordinary strength!

Ok, that's a plush toy animal.

We saw a real-lush animal.

He lives with a Marsupilamette

She makes little strident noises.

- Houba, houba, houba...
- Gni, gni, gni...&c...

- Houba, houba, houba...
- Gni, gni, gni...

OK, control booth, can we run...
- No!

If we don't save the Marsu,
we'll all die! All die!

- The Payas said...
- Stop it! Stop it!

- El Sombero, the volcano will belch fire
- You've shamed us!

- devastate the earth for 1000 years.
- Stop, you!

- Then it'll be all over!
- Stop it, you hear?

STOOOOPP!

It's the Chicxulub prophecy.

Houba.

He wasn't lying!
My son didn't lie!

We're living a historic moment,

the discovery of a new species,

a mammal, they thought
did not exist,

but which does exist, the Marsupilami!

(You've arrived at your destination)

What's all this?

So! Where is he?

Gimme my eggs!

Cassandra

Control booth, a psychopath
just came onstage.

He's throwing live *carrots.

Gimme my eggs!

"It wasn't my war"!

No! You're not going...

We have a break in the
live feed with Chiquito.

Our control booth, is doing its best

to rapidly fix this technical problem.

- Yes!
- Yeah!

Don't move.

The eggs...

Papa, is he dead?

I like this,
it's a bit like Easter.

His pulse, his pulse!

Oh, an egg!

Ah no, it's a six.

No... don't come near.

I warn you, I took karate.
- So?...

*Austrian Savate.

Polombia, its currency is the palombo.

It's motto
which you may know is:

"Pa-lump-it or like it."

Our site: www dot...

OK, it's over. Back to papa.

Papa...

Save him, papa.

Hasta luego! (See-ya later)

What's dragging?

No! I detest you!
- Yes!

- Yes!
- I saved him, Cassandra!

They're my eggs!
They'll never be your eggs!

- Come here.
- Leggo! Leggo my jeep!

That's enough, now!

My serum...

Ha ha!
I'm in top forme!

- You OK?
- *No way dude!

- I'm having a *bad trip, man!
- OK, we got an image.

This place is *gnarly!

Petunia, hold my head up.

Support my head!

Not so cocky in diapers, huh?
- Well, yeah.

That's a scoop.

Houba!

Commercial!

- Papa!
- Papa!

- We saw the Marsupilami!
- Ah yes, you saw it?

- You're not a liar.
- You're not a liar.

It's true...

Told-ya, I'm not a liar.

Bravo, sonny, I'm proud of you!

I never doubted you, *kiddo.
- Thanks, papa.

I've been a bit stifling, at times,
you know how parents are.

But now, you're flying
on your own wings!

- OK? - Yes.
- Want me to come there?

Papa, I swear it's all right.

- You'd tell me, huh?
- Yes, papa, everything's fine.

- Pablito!
- Everything's great.

You were pretty ridiculous on TV!

Excited like a loco
with your plush toy, huh?

I'll call you back.

Houba! Houba! Houba!

Get back, ninos.

Our 160,000 palombos.

My Kiki.

Houba!

Nice to see ya.

Up, up... Get in,
watch your fingers!

- Bye!
- See ya!

Pablito?

You sure the nest is this way?
- Yes.

- Pablito, you're sure AND certain?
- Yes, I'm sure the nest is this way.

Still, I get the impression
I've seen this tree, before

Now you recognize trees?!
You've become a tree-ologist?

Yeah, well maybe!

It so happens that by dint of
trudging through th...

Dan!

Aw, this guy's nuts!

Yow!

(You have a message.)

Hello General Pochero. It's Celine.♥

Dan Geraldo told me

what you did for the Marsupilami.

Bravo, it was very courageous
and genereous.

So, this little message
is just to tell you

that I'd be delighted, someday,
to come and sing

in Chiquito, at your home in Palombia.

And if you want to come
onstage for a duo,

I think I've got a song
that you know well.

See you soon, General.

(Message erased.)

Huh? Huh?

- (Erased)
- No! No! - (eeeee)

(Stop. Turn left)

♪Translated by♪ XQ2☻♥