Gulyay, Vasya! (2017) - full transcript
Contemporary Russia. Mitya and Alisa are set to get married. The problem is that Mitya is still married to Vasya, who refuses to grant him a divorce. Can Mitya and his friends convince Vasya to change her mind?
Darling
Wake up
Darling
Darling wake up, wake up
Wake up
Have I slept too long, right?
Everyone is already waiting us
Who await, where?
Guests
Which guests?
Today is my father’s birthday. Did you forget?
So?
Listen, I didn’t buy a present
It’s not scary, go, take a shower, and we will wait you down there.
Come on.
Alysa, Alysa. Wait, maybe I won’t go?
Why?
Will I sit there like idiot? Eating for free?
Don’t worry, father doesn’t think about it, come on
Soo, It’s time for gifts now.
Alice, can I go out?
What? No, it will offend father.
I gift to you, Volodya, small accessory with jewels, with all my heart.
We need to drink for it.
I gift to you, fishing… in Spain
Oooh
I love this day
35 meters long boat
Take it
Vanya
And use
Mommy and I prepared for you… a gift!
Is it what I think it is?
Yes, it’s collectible coins
Wow
We found them (inaudible)
A new young person in our company here, let’s listen to him
Very much was said and gifted
It’s my boyfriend
I want to… gift as well. I want to gift you…
A hand?
And… honesty and sincerity, your daughter and I want to gift you, and I
Is he doing a marriage proposal?
I agree
You have our blessing!
You didn’t get it
Alice, I need to talk with you
Don’t worry, my father takes care of everything by himself
The wedding will be in 2 weeks, just in time before his fishing trip
Just a few small things left, a dress and everything will be in 2 weeks
2 weeks?
Yes. Why hold up?
Listen, I need to go home.
Why?
What do you mean? I need to tell my mother
You can call her
I could call but...
...we don’t do things like this. She is a very sensitive person and you know, what if she get hurt form happiness?
I need to be close. I need to support her
Hello
Hello, It’s been a long time, right?
Time flies.
How is Moscow?
Still in the same place
I heard you have a high salary
Vasya, here is a deal… I need a divorce
Why?
What do you mean? We are not together, you have your own life, I have my own
This ring thinks otherwise.
Remove it. I removed it, it’s possible
Why? I liked it a lot, why did you take it off? I want you to wear it.
Vasya, I know like 10 people who doesn’t stop before it.
You spend a good time with them. Let me go
Did you find someone?
No
Then you don’t need a divorce
I do, I need to make a deal, my wife’s signature is required.
I can come over
I found someone, but it’s irrelevant
Who is she?
Won’t say
Until you tell me I won’t give you a divorce
You don’t know her anyway
What the difference? I want to know who is taking my beloved husband.
Should I show her to you?
Bring her to me
I won’t do this
Let me guess, she is a curly blonde with stupid voice?
At first, she is not blonde, but brunette, and third she is awesome.
Awesome, then bring her to me, I become acquainted. But until I don’t see the bride, I won’t give divorce
Hello
What do you want?
I need help
Aaaaah, Mitya
What have you done with grandma’s apartment?
It’s a loft
What loft? What is wrong with you? Who are these people?
Where?
Here. Who count money
It's my accountants, all with higher education, all legal
Are you planning something?
Noo, we are just closing company.
Dump it all?
Dump it, except the blue bag
Got it
Listen, Ilya, Ilya, Ilya.
Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes
I’m Garik, right now I’m Garik
Listen, I need a bride… for the evening
Girl for a night?
Not exactly.
I need someone who can act like my bride. She must be nice, clean, good, untainted.
We will clean her, comb out, whatever you want. This here is not a bad variant
Hey…
Hey…
Hey, hey.
Listen, she’s kinda sleepy, let’s find someone livelier.
Let’s check out the hunter’s hut.
What? There are prostitutes.
No, they found new girls.
Pimp will bring them now.
lynx yeah? Awesome. Nice interior. It’s a hunter-souteneur-collector-hunter.
Now, now, Oh, I got horny. Here, look.
Hello, hello, choose.
Should I bring more?
You have more?
Yes, but it’s the best. Need more?
No
Choose, Choose, Choose.
Seriously?
Listen, Why are you even choosing, come on, take any, they are all good. Take two of them, small and big.
How I will go with this snow white? Vasya won’t believe me.
What? I don’t understand.
What’s the problem?
No, no hard feelings, nothing…
A bit worn out, do you know how talented she is? She’s young inside.
It's exquisite! Jeanne, don’t listen to him.
All our girls are popular, you know, we don’t have all day.
Raid!
What’s going on? Garik, Garik, Garik.
Quickly, quickly
All move out through back door
Garik, Garik!
We need to jump out of window.
What? Where? It’s a bad idea.
It’s an awesome idea. I don’t want to go in jail second time!
Don’t follow me.
Run the other way.
What about bride?
What about bride?
Will find her next time!
Will find her next time!
Ok, thank you for help!
Yeah
Hello, hello
How is my future husband?
Sitting here.
Resting somewhere?
Yeah, on a feast with my relatives.
Who is laughing there?
Mom with grannie celebrating.
Did you speak with mom?
How can I? They are stuck to each other, can’t help it, for a long time.
Well OK then, say hello for me.
OK, kissing you, bye-bye
Your long drinks
That was quick
As always
Good evening
Careful.
Look, you still remember that i like Long Island
It’s not for you
But for who? For a girlfriend of yours? Where she is?
Won’t come. She’s ill.
Mitya, enough imagining, you’re...
Just seeking an excuse to see me again, you want me.
Firstly: I have a bride, Second: I don’t want you, and third:
What’s wrong? I’ve loved you, haven’t I?
Brought you to Thailand, bought you clothes, gifted a car, let me go, give me the divorce.
No
Why?
I had a vision
What vision?
Very strong.
Didn’t experience it before.
There was a stream and I stood in it knee-deep, it was very cold, then I entered it the second time and it became warm.
It was our marriage, everything will change
Nothing will change
It’s the other way around, you can’t step into the same river twice.
Are you interpreting my own dreams?
It’s obviously about you, aquarius, it’s about us. Will we go to your place or mine?
Can I borrow you for a second?
Can I borrow you for a second?
Yes of course, something wrong?
Yes of course, something wrong?
I know it sounds stupid
but
my ex-wife is sitting in the next hall.
We are together 3 years.
In short: she doesn’t give me divorce, and I need to prove her that I have someone, OK?
Can you be my bride for a while?
I guess you need a good lawyer, divorce can be done without
Can, can be done without agreement, but it’s long, I have only 2 weeks.
Really, you can save your time, I’m not allowed to enter the hall.
Why?
Do you see Yuri? If he notices that I’m moving there, then…
I’ll buy all long islands
Asya, nice to meet you.
Full name?
No, my full name is Anastasia.
So, we love each other, everything is good and nice. Can we divorce now?
What’s the rush?
He is always rusing it.
Especially sex.
I didn’t even manage to finish a thought, and he’s already standing up and putting on his pants.
We don’t have such problem. He is like: yo-ho-ho.
It will change, believe me.
I can say a lot about him. Do you know how many diseases he has?
What diseases? Stop imagining.
You are allergic to fish.
You have one foot in the grave.
We went to a resort.
He just sniffed fish, and his body started swelling, gums itching, he had to pierce trachea, blood everywhere.
I laughed so hard.
Are you ok?
Yeah, yeah I’m fine, thanks.
Where did she go?
You speak nonsense, so she got offended.
So? Can we divorce?
Yeah, since you have someone, I need to find someone as well.
Do seek.
Who will you offer?
What do you mean offer?
From your friends
You want me to seek you a husband?
I know what you want, you know what I want, who I want.
You need a psychiatrist, Vasya.
No, I need someone who will love me very much...
...someone who will love me...
...like Pasha.
So, let’s celebrate our divorce and invite him there, and there...
I will catch him, and he will be mine.
What is this?
5 minutes ago, you wanted to get me back. I was your stream.
All still remains, you are stream, you must bring me a fish. And he is a fish by the sign of zodiac.
He swam to me in my dreams, hugged my feet and warmed me up.
Your fish.
O? Signs are everywhere, you see? Thanks.
Who are you?
Call Pasha please
But who are you?
I’m his old friend
Which one?
Surprise
Pasha
Ah?
Here is one of your dumbass friends
Which one?
I don’t know which one, tell me
Pasha
Yes?
Hello
Hello, who are you?
It’s Mitya
Ah Mitya, hello
So, how are you?
Nice, standing here, breathing air
Yeah, the weather is awesome, we had +20 on last week, ?
Are you sane?
Me? Yes
Pasha
Hello?
Open the door
I can’t open now, I’ll better step outside to you.
What will you do?
I’ll open the door to Miya.
No
What if something is up
It’s 11 o’clock you need to drink herbal tea
I’ll drink it on the way.
Hello
What, how are you?
I’m fine, how are you?
Fine
In short, I have a deal to you
Speak
I have problems with Vasya
Have you had a fight?
We still can’t divorce
And, how I can help?
Remember you had affair in school?
Affair?
She still can’t forget it.
Yeah?
She lost her mind, says you are the man of her dreams
Why do you think so? I affect women in a certain way.
Can you hit on her with her for me?
I can’t, Kira will kill me.
I’m not asking you to have sex with her, just pretend, and I will slip the papers for divorce.
What are we supposed to speak of?
Don’t you know how it’s done? Just drink and you will figure it out.
I’d drink but I quit drinking. I do yoga.
Pavel
Yes?
Pavel, what’s going on?
Your wife?
Yes
Hello, Kristina, how are you?
Yes
Kira
Hello, Kristina, how are you?
Kira
Kira
Kira
It’s my classmate, also he is leaving right how
No, I don’t, I just got here. Came to you, to know how do you do. How?
Is he sick?
No, he isn’t, it’s his stress from train.
Go home quickly, your legs are bare.
Ok, fine.
You are wearing pants.
And? Let’s go. When do you want my help?
The day after tomorrow.
I can’t after tomorrow, we are going to the theatre
What? Which theatre?
Ok, let’s go.
Where is meat?
We don’t eat it
How don’t you eat meat? In the past you ate dung with bare hands
Quiet, Kira may hear us
That’s all dude, enough, this weekend we will take off properly: vodka, bathhouse, stuff like this
Yeah I want to take off as well, but Kira will kill me first.
Listen, you will call taxi and their car will knock me.
Agree
Agree
Why do you whispering like girls?
Nothing, I wanted to go out and show…
Taxi can’t find me, circling around
I know where the entrance is, so I can show
Show from the balcony, you don’t need to go anywhere. OK?
Yes, yes you right.
Where is your taxi, did you call it?
Maybe it’s around the corner. Maybe you jump from balcony?
Agree
Don’t even think about it, I won’t let you go anywhere
I didn’t want
What are you afraid of? That he will run away from you?
Shouldn’t have said it
It’s ok, I figure it out. Listen, you act like a Hitler, I swear to god.
Pasha, your wife is being insulted in her own house.
It’s my home.
Pasha
But don’t insult her.
Ok. Tell to your fuhrer then, to slow down.
That’s it Pasha, him, or me, right now
Do you even think?
I didn’t even a second
Enough! I will take my friend to the theatre, understand?
And will show you how to party, and you can, do whatever you want.
Asya, Asya Listen I need your help, just for one night.
Why do you look at me me? Like you saw a dead man.
I guess I just did
Who is it?
This? It is, sort of , boyfriend… of mine.
Sort of boyfriend?
Listen, It’s not important what will come next, you need to understand that nothing happened between us.
You didn’t tell him anything, yes?
I was a boxer for 10 years, trained to hit painfully and without traces, get it?
How?
I can show you.
Dude, think about it, what if you will regret this? Or maybe
I’m sorry, did you want to tell me something?
Ow, it hurts.
I’m sorry, did you want to tell me something?
Ow, it hurts.
Dude if you touch me again, I am warning you.
You have smashed my face.
Not a scratch. How?
Two years in police.
Shall we continue?
Dude, I didn’t want to hit on your girlfriend, why you can’t get it?
Yes? Than what do you want to do?
Simply business. If she will play the role of my girlfriend I will pay big money.
What?
Repeating: I need to divorce my ex-wife, money is not a problem
You want to buy me? Huh? Me and my girlfriend?
Kind of yes
She would be just playing a role
Yes
Not for real
Yes
I will be nearby
Yes? I mean no. I am her boyfriend. How you will be nearby
I am her boyfriend.
But my ex thinks that it’s me
Ah, yeah. Then I will observe you from a distance
What do you say?
That you both are crazy
What do you mean?
What if.
You will be her brother, you looks similar. Like dog and it’s owner.
So it’s true, years living together makes people closer.
Similar, yeah, if I will play her brother, you will pay me as well.
No, you are the brother, so brotherly help.
Hey, enough.
Stop, stop. stop, wait, don’t you think it went too far? You pay him for me?
Like.
Yes.
Nastya, don’t worry. It’s funny. We will receive money and solve all our financial problems.
Maybe not all, partially.
Solve all financial problems, it doesn’t matter to you what to spend the money on, right?
Either to patch your mug or doing the thing.
Ok, ok, don’t punch him, ok? I agree
Thank you
Does your face hurt? He touched you?
No... yes
Hurt you with non-contact technique?
No
Hurt?
Yes
I see that it hurts
Pay the deposit
You asked for place for a party? Here is it. Mitya, Marusya.
Hello
Don’t know, man, cook, maybe was hired recently. Huge main hall… we have.
Ah, bathroom, in a comfy distance. I am showing…
We will have a banquet here.
It’s a nice place for a party.
Yeah guys? You can do here whatever you like, look.
Take undersheet, it just doesn’t tear, get it? It tears, but even when it tears, you can continue to tear it.
Take, chair, it’s reusable…
Marusya doesn’t even blink, stone-woman, you can go in intelligence with her.
So think, think about it, not long, we don’t like to wait.
Hello?
What’s there? Did you find a place for company party?
Looking for it
Sea fish
Stop looking, I have a grand idea, go to our place, it’s nice here.
In some sort of shack?
Hello?
I don’t want a shack
Hello?
I want a civilized environment
What shack? WTF?
I live in the house my grandad left us, can party here, invite the whole village
Put the speakers and the table outside, the whole village will celebrate.
And what are you planning? Tell me where will you go?
Uhh, thought about restaurant.
Are you dumb, ah?
You what? Did you see from what they are cooking?
All is genetically-modified.
Potato, did you see it?
Like watermelon, growing it half of my life, watering it, fertilising it, I never had such potato in my life, get it?
And the carrot? Israeli, doesn’t fit in mouth, you tried it? No?
No
And don’t even attempt, because I tried.
In short, here’s the deal, want it or no, get to ours.
We’ll organize everything, you only need to drop the money and all will be fine
That’s all bye.
So?
Is there anything else except fish?
Ah… What else you need? It says mirror carp.
Nothing except fish, river, sea all fresh, transported by train, phosphor, calcium.
I am allergic to fish.
Then, it’s sad. Yeah
Now, wait, one second. You both look great.
Here.
Ok, watch him to get there safe.
Uh, uh, uh, wait, wait… Careful… Ok, bye.
Are you ready?
Now I will finish this and we’ll sit…
What is this?
Flowers
Why?
For you to better fit in role. There was a granny that sold flowers, wool socks on the street, so I bought flowers.
Socks could be useful too.
Ok. How did we met?
On a bus stop.
A bus stop?
I carried pies to grandma… And…
Met on a bus stop on the street and…
And understood everything
I was driving by, you stood
Yes, freezing
Warmed you up in the car. It’s important to listen each other, if I will start lying, you join.
Physical disadvantages
?
And advantages… Uh ok. Personal touch.
I have a scar from appendicitis
Scar? Classic, but it was minor scar, but here is a super scar.
Why?
Because there is a love story behind it.
He punched you?
No. He carried me on sled.
Oh
Do you record it?
Uh yes.
Uh we rode from a hill that was in the yard and crushed into house and my foot just impaled on razor…
So, he left the sled, grabbed me and carried me home…
Yeah, was a hero.
I thought, a real man, worthy to marry.
Then he carried me, put down before door, rang and hid away, cause was afraid that my parents will punish him.
Also I have a tattoo.
Show it
It is necessary? Yes?
But don’t tell anyone what you saw.
What’s going on here?
I showed, tattoo...
...to become better acquainted
To know facts
Preparing
To catch each other, to pass all normally
Recording.
We need to play lovers after all. I totally don’t like here
I don’t like him
I don’t like him too, let’s go
Maybe I order you a taxi?
No, not needed
But you are drunk
You care? I managed to get here, I will return back, I can go anywhere
Max, calm down
Ok, Universe,
Forget about him, we don’t need it, all what I have asked, all prayers...
...we recallocate on this young person.
In short, why I even explain it? We talked about it pretty long time.
I want a man with money and status, you get it? Yes? Yes. Thank you universe
Kira, Kirochka.
I have learned how to do your pose, do you remember it? Shvan… Shvansman… san.
Something like this. Look, do I stand straight? Kira.
Kirochka, you really don’t want to go with us?
I. Go. To the theatre.
Cuts like a knife, my love.
Did I tell you?
Told
Did I warn you?
Warned
Did I tell you, that it’s Petrus Brancelcaltus himself. The best underground director in Europe?
And it’s not just my opinion, It’s an Afisha (website)’s opinion.
Uh, yes...
Do you get that this person creates plays once in 5 years?
Yes
But you want something else
You want to eat bread with garlic, you want to swim in goo with pigs, here, degrade, but I will go to theatre
What a sorrow!
What?
I say, enjoy, my love.
Sector clear.
Don’t forget the product
Pash
Hey
Pasha
I usually dress to match her. Is it fine for you?
Hey, don’t touch this picture
Is it her, yes?
Yes it is, yes, please don’t touch it, she wouldn’t like it. Don’t polish it, simply stay away
Hello, what do you do?
Decided to visit my friends.
Tell to them about wedding
Ah, you have a bachelor party?
Kind of
Ah, who are your friends?
Aaah. one of them banker, other a businessman.
Mmm, that’s ok. Listen, invite them on our wedding
I don’t know if they can make it.
I will come if you will.
What the rush?
Can’t wait till the evening?
Now, will drink a shot and then go
Ok, sunshine bye. Maybe you hold up till the party?
What? When the party starts. I need to be ready. Pour it.
I didn’t flirt with...
...strangers
Was all the time with Kira, with her is easy, she tells me yes and I do it… Why you poured so little? More.
To get going.
Come on. Why so little.
Aren’t you gonna get wasted, sir?
Guy, I know my limits.
I’m immortal!
Everything is fine guys
Why did you drive this fast?
I just was in hurry, I had an call, honestly, It wasn’t on purpose.
Pasha, how are you?
Suddenly fell down.
You were smashed by a car.
My god, is it ok?
It is, but look at your leg.
It points to wrong direction.
Whatever, I’m flexible. I’m yogi.
It points to wrong direction.
Whatever, I’m flexible. I’m yogi.
Let’s go to hospital Pasha
Boys, I am fine.
Please don’t call the police, they will send me home. I can’t be at home right now.
Watch where you drive.
Small family 35 people
35, you will go to jail for sure
Listen, what did you expect, you came to Russia - you need to learn the rules, laws, understand?
I learn, learn, look there in the glove box, look. See, book, russian culture, love it, learning poems
Wait, he is passing out
Pasha
Guys he left somewhere
Smirnov, where did you do? What happened to you?
Nothing, I, got cut.
By yourself?
Yes
Move your finger
It’s fine
Attempted suicide Smirnov
What attempt?
Decided to cut vein
What attempted suicide?
I can see it
If I do attempt, I finish it… I, eeh, slipped, was going and got cut
Let looney-house take care of you, added you to a watch list
No no no no, no it can’t be.
What do you mean can’t be? Cutting veins is ok, but being in watch list - is not?
No, no, I can’t be on the watch list, because…
Enough
I have cut him
What does this mean?
He broke our friend’s leg and I cut him for this
Ok, Smirnov, sit and wait. You will be summoned
Sit down
Calm down
Where are you always going
It’s fine
No, isn’t
Calm down, calm down
Show me your hand
Here she is, here. I cut myself because of her
Guys, guys look it’s again on the right place, like new, points forward
What did they say?
Said, that it have multiple fractures and shard injuries
Doesn’t matter, can you walk?
They said to wait hospitalisation.
What are you doing?
We don’t have the time. Come on
Wait, wait
We are late to the party, come on, it will heal itself later
Start a car, quickly
Wait, I’m thirsty
Let’s go
Not bad here, authentic
How grandad left it, it still stands, we didn’t change anything important, saving traditions, yes?
Family
Grandad was not a designer
He was a miner
That’s how it is. Underground style in everything. Did you heard about feng shui?
If your ex will continue it, Max wont handle
Max will handle if he want to get money
Max, what are you doing?
Chopping wood, according feng shui
Listen, what if you feed the pigs?
Oh, good idea, feeding pigs with her, set a pig tour for her
Pig-tour? Are you serious?
That’s all, bye
Here it is. Farm.
Quails. They produce small eggs, when they lay, it slides.
Smells gross
Uh yeah, smells. Here is hen with chickens, look how small they are, like furry keyfob
What is it? Is it mini-pig?
Eeh no, it’s just pigs, which, listen, maybe you won’t grab it?
My friend have one of these. Will you move to my place?
He will start to worry. Don’t.
Max, didn’t you feed the pigs?
Nothing, they are biting
Again?
She stuck her nose there, but it bit.
Why did she have to go around, poking here?
I don’t know, she thought that it’s a mini-pig, but it teared half of her nose.
Give her plantain.
What plantain, she’s bleeding.
Noone has asked her to touch anything
Why are you starting
Fool
We have arrived!
That’s all, you can go
Let me help, Mitya, get it
Fatty
Guys, is the toilet outside?
Kinda yes
What will happen to me? Won’t I infect with rabies?
No you won’t. They’re all vaccinated. Aren’t they Max?
Yes, some of them. Didn’t you see the mark behind pig’s ear?
What mark?!
Quiet, quiet, relax, alright, ready, you are beautiful
You have losses as well?
What about you?
Come here
Hey, hey Vasya, what happened?
I was bitten by a snake, that’s what happened
Wife’s brother, I mean bride’s, husband
Do you have something?
Starting?
Of course we are starting, I’ve noticed quickly that you are fine fellows, aren’t you?
How is he without me?
He is fine, but because of you, because of your water, we will stand in this queue all evening.
Maybe I had to go with him?
You did it right, men must be educated.
Yes
Otherwise they will start to rule you. Do you need it?
No
Feeling surround? We made a visor here specifically to direct sound inside.
Pour it in glass and force him to drink
Vasya, this person came from hospital
And?
He took medicine, antibiotics. Mixing antibiotics with alcohol is forbidden.
Listen here. If you won’t keep our terms, you won’t get the divorce. Never
Give me this. Guys, let’s drink it pure.
I offered the same. Suggested it before. Here, for what we will drink?
For true man’s friendship
Stop guys, stand still, for men need to drink like men. While standing
While standing
Can I drink without standing?
While standing
Let him stand
So… Let us be, guys
For manly friendship
Cool, bad, you drink like a girl. Ok, since it’s all like this - look…
Come on, darling, hold the cucumber.
Like a tear it’s pure.
Oh
Bravo
Here, check it out
Well done
Take it please, s'il vous plaît. Ok, let’s do sauna?
Oh! It’s nice
I want there too
And me
You can’t go with your leg.
Then I don’t want
Sister, what kind of man did you find? He can’t drink vodka, he doesn’t want to soar in sauna, not a man but woman
But I earn like a man
Seriously?
So what?
What does it give you? Making you a man?
Another thing makes a man, get it?
So like this
Progress equalized us all. What did a rich person have in the past? Mirror, salt, mobile phone came after.
You are wearing a shirt for 300 dollars, yeah, but I wear a shirt for 300 rubles.
But in fact we are both dressed, get it?
What car you have, BMW perhaps? I have out native.
But anyway 90 km/h is law of Russian Federation equalized us all and faster than 90 you can’t drive, get it?
What else do you have? What, tell me? I have a house, farm, fine girl…
Had
Had, she died 4 years ago.
Horrible
What about travelling? For example, I like to travel around the world. You need money for this.
It’s fine to travel in Russia for me, have you traveled on a yacht? Nastya and I, we like collecting mushrooms.
Quitting area of comfort, it’s good.
Keep yourself in tonus, it will be useful for you taking into account the circumstances.
What circumstances?
You will have to work in garden alone.
What you say?
Nastya will go with me to the city, didn’t you think she will hang out in this hovel.
Enough, you have carried him on your back, no longer.
Let’s drink for the family
Yes, let’s drink for it.
I love my brother-in-law can’t handle myself.
Call me brother
My little brother
Brother
Little brother, let’s have a Bruderschaft drink, yes?
Forgot to clink glasses.
Your face is so familiar, we need to soar in sauna, yes, soar, ah?
I’ll better go with Nastya.
Better with me.
I mean, I’ve installed new furnace and you won’t figure out.
Now I will show it, oh, and will soar your eyes, come on.
I’ll show furnace, and after he will return
Wait
Remember we are family
Come here
We are family, we are family
Wait
With who you’ll come in bath? Ah?
Come here!
Slowly, slowly
Wait
I won’t give you money, you hear?
Whom will you go to sauna with again?
With her, not you. We had an agreement?
I need to be there.
I need to be there, I need to nudge Pasha, he is like a panda, understand? Not capable of reproduction
I don’t give a shit about you or your panda, sucker.
I’m too shy to ask, but what am I paying you for?
Whom?
You
Me? You aren’t paying me anything, you are paying to my girlfriend. For the table, my house, but not me.
Come on.
Did you think about getting a job?
Why do I need it? I am earning enough, look.
You’re almost like a golden hoof. I punch you and you give me money.
Come on, come on, ooo, you have more here, al
All
Well done
Like the smell? Fine?
Alisa hello
Hello honey, how are you? Going to sleep
So early?
I am in province. Here, when alcohol market closes everyone goes to sleep.
Did you talk to mom?
Mom was in a rush today, I didn’t catch her.
I mean, not much time left and we gotta prepare.
Talk to her.
Tomorrow, I’ll talk tomorrow
Fine, kiss you, love you, bye
Yeah, yeah, till tomorrow, kiss
Hot guy, you are a king
Spanish dances. It’s yours
Elemental dances
It’s tequila
Where a salt?
Salt we don’t need
Harick, Harick, you wanted to soar, go, Max is waiting you, go and soar! Do you hear me? Go away
Get back
What are you doing?
Listen, let me go. it’s my new strategy, understand? Make him envy.
Are you sure?
Of course, look at him, his feelings burn, passion and love, get it?
Let’s make out with you as well, to make him envy because of us, will you dance?
No Vasya, I don’t dance
What do you mean? You liked it before
My Nastya just don’t like it
What honey?
I told about dances
I love dances very much. What we will dance?
Yes
What?
Sweating good
Let me pour more water
Nice muscle
Apparently, I didn’t exercise a long time, but the muscles still remember, here is the bicep, very hard, touch it
Feeling it?
Just like stone
Trained it in the garden
Who is beating first, huh?
Are you sure? Is buying it? Can it be believed?
I think yes, let’s continue
Isn’t it too much? Isn’t it, Mitya?
Carry on dancing
Bravo!
It’s incredible
Just awesome, main thing is how director with simple interactions showed the essence of person’s soul-searching.
He didn’t call
Why does he need to call, he is with girls already, maybe having fun there.
No, Pasha isn’t like this
Oh, they all not like this. You have a tracker. Look, look where he is
Now
Uff, nice
What are you planting in this garden?
What? What’s your interest?
I am agronomist, a bit, just an amature.
Seriously? Planting what?
One idea, it just requires special care.
Tomato?
Something like this. Just more profitable, very profitable
What is more profitable than tomato?
What are you dancing? Like not a family. Kiss her husband. Come on, come on.
Are they kissing? Is it passion for you?
I’ll show you what is passion. Pasha.
Pasha
We need to make a coffee for him.
Now, I will do it now.
I’ll help
Instant?
Do you have ground?
Now
Let me help
Nooo
It’s fine
What is it?
I distributed leaflets for “mirror carp”.
Mirror carp, cool place
Yes, don’t you think she suspected something?
Of course, not a surprise with acting like yours
I did my best, you just can’t imagine how hard it is to fall in love with you
I managed...
I mean, acted like I did
You’re rushing it.
Mh?
You can’t put coffee on that much fire, it needs to progress slowly
Your money - my money, your bank - my bank, your card - with my name on it
What is it?
Nothing
Why is it so cold here?
Where is Mitya?
Making coffee, everyone went home
What about you?
Me? Nothin’
Why are you waving hands?
I’m guarding you, keeping mosquitos away
Ok
Did you get drunk?
I didn’t, just fresh air mellowed me
Mellowed?
Yeah, I got tired
Let’s go lay down, I’m tired too
Where we will lay?
Do you even think what you are saying? Lay, you have a husband, I have a wife. And your husband is my best friend.
Mitya
It’s just a formality
At first, get rid of this formality, get all paperwork done, then do whatever you want… don’t do it.
Let’s go then in hay barn, I will sign everything.
Yeah?
Yes
Sign all today?
Of course, right after.
Ok, let’s go
Go
Go, will you sign right now? And everything right, each document?
Let’s go, I just slip to the toilet, and be right back.
I’ll wait you here.
You think I won’t return?
But I will
Will see
I’m going
Why did you break up with Vasya?
She cheated
Well …
Locals...
Sad that we met so late
Why late?
Just I…
What’s up?
What’s up with you?
We are making ... coffee… for everyone.
Where is Vasya?
She went crazy. She’s pulling me to the hay barn
We don’t have a hay barn
Good you don’t have it. But do you have a toilet?
Yes
Show it
I’ll show it
Planting will be on immigrants, I have samples.
We only need to set a contact, we don’t need to do anything.
We need to inject a business idea, if you have connections in the club.
Yeah, I have all the connections in the club
Hello, where are you going?
Where are you going?
We are going to the toilet
We are going to do some stuff
What stuff?
Different stuff there, Harick needs it. Continue the party without us, we will handle some deals
I want to pee
Ok, we going
Shit, almost got caught
Wait, I’ll just take product
The light?
The lock got stuck, wait a sec.
Is it something illegal?
What? No, the opposite. Yes?
Legal
All legal and fine
Are you sure?
Sure
Put the bag on the back seat
Where are you going? To the club?
Even if so, so what?
They have betrayed you, you owe them money
How? Betrayed?
Calm down… don’t be nervous. Nobody have betrayed me, here chew this gum.
What are you talking about? I’m trying to restruct the debt.
Maybe you don’t need to do stuff that you can’t even spell?
What are you talking about? I’m trying to restruct the debt.
Maybe you don’t need to do stuff that you can’t even spell?
How to flush?
You are my little. Decided to hide away? Yes? Now I will wash you
You always ruin my business ideas. Yes, business and I was chosen to be the co-founder.
Who choose you?
Who choose you. He. And now we are going toward to success
Why you don’t want to get a normal job, like everyone?
Like who? Like who of everyone? Pouring drinks to alcoholics? Flirt with them?
Actually it’s our only source of income. Also pigs and the garden, which is on me as well.
What? Go away, did you just money shamed me? I will return everything to you till the last penny.
And since we’re here, we are breaking up, got it? Divorce. Because I don’t need…
Divorce?
And since we’re here, we are breaking up, got it? Divorce. Because I don’t need…
Divorce?
Yes, yes. I don’t need a girl that doesn’t believe in my economy. That’s all, pack your stuff and make conclusions.
Nastya, where is Pasha?
Please look at my back, am I dirty?
No, clean
Oh, so hot.
Mitya, Mitya!
Mitya isn’t here, he is busy. Why?
He couldn’t just fall down. Actually could
Yes?
Yes. It happened, just not with this toilet
Mitya, Mitya!
Did you hear it?
It's from there?
So good, can I get warm here?
It’s occupied. I think I’ll go.
Don’t!
Vasya,
Calm down, seriously, enough, no, stop, stop
Shit, we are late, they are probably having sex already, even windows fogged up.
It is a sauna, it must be this way
Ah, really?
Vasilisa! Vasya. Pasha.
Where are you going?
Why you didn’t move closer?
If they notice us on this car they won’t even start to talk.
Shut the windows.
Hey, put the product back, listen. On the first meeting better not to flash it.
My palms itch - we’ll get money for sure.
I like bath
Good, warm
Distracts me
Mitya knocking again, maybe he is cold? We need to…
Forget
It rubs better
Yes
What’s this?
Moving to plan B
Should I catch the rhythm?
What rhythm?
Rhythm
Play to remove his boner.
Vasya, everything is fine for me, really. I have a family.
I’m a happy person, do you understand Vasya?
I don’t need all this.
Don’t do it, don’t do it
Otherwise will have to pull the worms out of a bush
What is it?
Dark night
I love my wife, understand?My Kira
Relax, please
Remember Kira
Her head torn away
Vasya, no, please.
Vasya, let me go, jesus, why they are screaming so loud?!
I’ll fucking shoot them!
Oh, they shut up?
What is this trash?
Wife
Not knife
Take it you bastard
Kira, Kira
Take it stupid
Enough, enough, calm down. Get away.
What are you doing? Did you punch me? You saw, he punched me.
Calm down, I’m helping my friend.
What are you doing? Did you punch me? You saw, he punched me.
Calm down, I’m helping my friend.
Nothing has happened
Yes?
Yes
Yes?
Yes
Something went wrong I need to be…
Vasya, let’s go home
Something went wrong I need to be…
Vasya, let’s go home
I need to be alone
Vasya, let’s go home
I need to be alone
Wait, wait.
She need to reset.
Oh, stream.
Tell me how to be.
Hello, they are here?
Who?
Head of it
No
Come on, reschedule next meeting, and we will wait here
500 rubles. From each
What? Your name?
Vladislav
Vladislav who? Who?
Vladislav Vladislav
So, Vladislav, now you should escort us to the VIP, and start searching a new job
See how much money? Smell it? Ah?
To earn some money, you need to spend it.
Now we should order the most costly drinks.
And manifesting girls, not those bitches.
Girls, just in case, we are there.
Yes, I am there, looking at you
What are you doing?
Nothing
Listen
Is it goulash? Hm? Yes?
Yes
M, goulash
But you are vegetarian
Don’t move closer
Don’t eat this crap, I’m begging you
Shut up and speak what you want to
Nothing happened
Nothing? Them answer to me on one question, why she was naked?
It’s a sauna... Because she wanted
And you didn’t want!
And I didn’t
And because she was naked. Fucking liar
I don’t lie, seriously
Dirty animal
I’m telling you there was nothing.
Maybe just one kiss
Bastard!
It was purely historical. I have kissed he, thought, what if it is love. Stop, enough, enough!
Onion
Listen, what are you doing, don’t eat onion. We won’t be able to kiss during whole week
I will never kiss you in my life!
Very tasty onion!
Enough, enough I’m telling you! Calm down!
I am a man here!
You are ugly
Maybe we’ll better wash first?
No, with her you were clean, with me will be dirty
It’s my day?
It’s my day?
I have asked a fine day at the morning!
I have asked a fine day
Because, it doesn’t matter how much you have asked, if you act like a bitch - you won’t get anything
Fishy? My fishy
I’m a carp
Sorry I don’t see so well
In short.
Stop acting like a bitch. Stop making fun of everyone. Give him a divorce. And everything will be ok.
Where you came from, carp?
From there
And why now?
Because... because I’m sending you teachers, prophets but you are getting nothing, and because of it I came personally.
Sorry
And I has come, but I don’t have much time, listen here. Leave your ex and leave Pasha.
But Pasha is just..
What with Pasha
We are a perfect pair with Pasha, understand? I have checked the horoscope, calendar, got it?
And?
We are compatible for 83%, It is love
Horoscopes are bullshit
No
I am a fish, I won’t advice a bad thing
Yes
That’s all
Thanks.
Seems like it worked, go and sign your papers, you are free
Nastya, Nastya
Yes?
Nastya, Nastya
Yes?
I need to tell you something
What happened?
I wanted this divorce so badly because in 2 weeks I will marry in Moscow
Marriage?
Cool.
Your marriage?
Yes
Congratulations… with it…
So if marriage then - cool, cool, super.
Excuse me that I didn’t tell you before, just…
Mitya, don’t, whatever, said now or before, give me the fish, and I will go.
I need to go, Max with his business, I need to go there
Nastya
Don’t think it is a dramatic farewell with fish, I really need to go
Nastya!
Universe! Take me!
Nastya!
Yes! I’m yours!
Hello
Hello Alisa, I am not ready to marry
What?
I am not prepared for marriage
You want to delay it? Is it because father hurried?
No, I want to cancel it.
Sorry
Didn’t two guys come here? One in a suit, second with a cap on.
Ah, got it.
Here came again this…
Fine one in this time
I don’t get it?
You are the call girl, for this one, wearing the cap
Yeah, I will go work
Sure
Nastya, stop. Wait, enough, guys, let me out.
Wait, stop, enough, why you.
It was on purpose, it was conceived, it was for work, we called the girls to lift the status of this deal.
Lifted?
Yes, now is fine, money will come. No need to hitchhike
Max what are you telling me?
Come on, enough
Half an hour ago you told me...
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
Move along
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
What is it with you? Why you so angry? I can’t get it
It’s all because of
Stop it, all and nothing. Stop, enough, why? Huh? Just stop
Are you really so stupid, Max? Do you not understand?
I understand. I understand that can’t be without you, without your eyes, without your nose.
Nastya.
Max what are you doing? What are you doing?
I hang.
I am down see? I fall off, you dropped me down
Get up
Step on me, right on my chest, like on poop
It’s nonsense
Help me, you hear?
Not convinced
Stop!
Go grab someone’s ass, maybe your “status” will get up.
Stop it.
Hide your phone, put this phone away! You didn’t get it?
I, Dimon, will come back and break your legs and slam your car.
Wait, really, enough
Get lost
Enough!
Do I need to lay before you half of my life, yes?
What’s with you, bitch, what?
Now you will sit in car and drive home, you get it?
Because I’m not going to seek you this night, sit in car, in the car I said.
You’ve lost your mind.
Whom you leave our house with?
Do you want to say that right now there are other people at home?
I am asking you!
You…
Happy? Huh?
Do you think you will find a good man here?
Hell no, there are no good guys.
And after me you don’t get anyone. I will gossip such stuff about you.
Why are you laughing?
Do you understand that this is it, Max?
Go to hell
What?
Dimon just wanna to race
Max, please enough.
Max.
Where are you going? Come on, come on, let’s race
Max, what are you doing?
Where are you going?
Asshole.
How are you?
Now.
How to call the ambulance? Don’t touch her, you here? Let professionals to do it
If we leave her here she will bleed out
Now
Hold it
She is bleeding
Easy, easy
I will call the ambulance, police, insurance
What a starry sky
Yeah
Will you fly with me?
Where will you go now without me?
Are you insane? Where did you bring us?
Entrance from the other side
Ah
Ole
Calm down
Ole ole ole, Russia, is the champion
Sit here
Yes
BP
You again, hello
Hello
How do you do?
Complicated
Very?
To marry one girl.
I broke with the other.
Meanwhile falling in love with a third. .
And additionally almost broke my friend’s marriage.
Best friend’s.
Something like this.
Today I pushed one person and he broke a bottle on my head, check it out?
Smirnov
Me
Let’s go
Hello
So
I am a relative
Wait for the doctor
I will sit there
Yeah…
How are you?
Yes, a hard situation.
Such...
...a set of circumstances happened.
You know what I understood?
That relationships is work.
Work on yourself.
That’s all, I have grabbed someone, that’s enough.
You’re doing it right dude, right, in any uneasy situation, you marry and the girl is yours.
Dude, I need to do it like you.
In short, she will exit and I will do a marriage proposal.
Flowers are here, you will be a witness.
What will you say, agree?
Hey old man, you have mistook me for someone man
Let my friend go
Listen, I’m boxer, I hit without a trace at all
And I am a paratrooper, you hear? Choking with traces
Who is a related to Naumova?
He is
You can walk in
And we will go with my colleague to wander
Just don’t hit him very hard
Me?
It’s over
I will do it only educational purposes
It’s over
Very softly
You know Bakunin?
Ah?
Do you know Bakunin?
Bakunin? Is he a paratrooper?
It will be better they said.
Close your eyes, close. I’m doing it not like with a corpse, just, whatever you want.
I had...
...a thing in the past.
When someone bullied me, I closed my eyes and thought that all the light faded,
So I will close eyes now and you’re all left without light
You’re back?
Brought socks to you. This time. Imagine, that granny still trades them. Also, seems like her business is getting better
What is your real reason?
Came to do marriage proposal to a girl.
M, so fluffy
Warm
Yeah, thought better this time?
Yes, sure, 100%
Good
Happy for you
Don’t forget socks
Flies are low.
The rain will fall.
What, let’s plant?
Come on, do second dowl
Throw, throw
I’m throwing
A bit, a bit, one drop, by one.
My great grandmother always asked help from earth. To make it more fertile
Head.
My Rus, homeland, looking on you like on my second half.
With you black mother, been everywhere, why you don’t do anything? Plants aren’t raising
Harick, stop it.
I’m not Harick, I am Ilia
Harick, stop it.
I’m not Harick, I am Ilia
Ilia, doesn’t-grow-shit-for-ya!
Come on, come on.
Ilia, doesn’t-grow-shit-for-ya!
Come on, come on.
Now, pal. Dig for now
Smells like shit
Shit. Maybe they gave us bad shit?
What’s wrong with you?
Listen, what with me? I just came and bought
Why are you laughing? You also wanted to build a greenhouse
And we will build it, I will build
Fuck you, you won’t get it
Listen, they will raise the third time, I feel it
Come here
Wait
Come here!
Running on pricy product
Wake up
Darling
Darling wake up, wake up
Wake up
Have I slept too long, right?
Everyone is already waiting us
Who await, where?
Guests
Which guests?
Today is my father’s birthday. Did you forget?
So?
Listen, I didn’t buy a present
It’s not scary, go, take a shower, and we will wait you down there.
Come on.
Alysa, Alysa. Wait, maybe I won’t go?
Why?
Will I sit there like idiot? Eating for free?
Don’t worry, father doesn’t think about it, come on
Soo, It’s time for gifts now.
Alice, can I go out?
What? No, it will offend father.
I gift to you, Volodya, small accessory with jewels, with all my heart.
We need to drink for it.
I gift to you, fishing… in Spain
Oooh
I love this day
35 meters long boat
Take it
Vanya
And use
Mommy and I prepared for you… a gift!
Is it what I think it is?
Yes, it’s collectible coins
Wow
We found them (inaudible)
A new young person in our company here, let’s listen to him
Very much was said and gifted
It’s my boyfriend
I want to… gift as well. I want to gift you…
A hand?
And… honesty and sincerity, your daughter and I want to gift you, and I
Is he doing a marriage proposal?
I agree
You have our blessing!
You didn’t get it
Alice, I need to talk with you
Don’t worry, my father takes care of everything by himself
The wedding will be in 2 weeks, just in time before his fishing trip
Just a few small things left, a dress and everything will be in 2 weeks
2 weeks?
Yes. Why hold up?
Listen, I need to go home.
Why?
What do you mean? I need to tell my mother
You can call her
I could call but...
...we don’t do things like this. She is a very sensitive person and you know, what if she get hurt form happiness?
I need to be close. I need to support her
Hello
Hello, It’s been a long time, right?
Time flies.
How is Moscow?
Still in the same place
I heard you have a high salary
Vasya, here is a deal… I need a divorce
Why?
What do you mean? We are not together, you have your own life, I have my own
This ring thinks otherwise.
Remove it. I removed it, it’s possible
Why? I liked it a lot, why did you take it off? I want you to wear it.
Vasya, I know like 10 people who doesn’t stop before it.
You spend a good time with them. Let me go
Did you find someone?
No
Then you don’t need a divorce
I do, I need to make a deal, my wife’s signature is required.
I can come over
I found someone, but it’s irrelevant
Who is she?
Won’t say
Until you tell me I won’t give you a divorce
You don’t know her anyway
What the difference? I want to know who is taking my beloved husband.
Should I show her to you?
Bring her to me
I won’t do this
Let me guess, she is a curly blonde with stupid voice?
At first, she is not blonde, but brunette, and third she is awesome.
Awesome, then bring her to me, I become acquainted. But until I don’t see the bride, I won’t give divorce
Hello
What do you want?
I need help
Aaaaah, Mitya
What have you done with grandma’s apartment?
It’s a loft
What loft? What is wrong with you? Who are these people?
Where?
Here. Who count money
It's my accountants, all with higher education, all legal
Are you planning something?
Noo, we are just closing company.
Dump it all?
Dump it, except the blue bag
Got it
Listen, Ilya, Ilya, Ilya.
Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes-Yes
I’m Garik, right now I’m Garik
Listen, I need a bride… for the evening
Girl for a night?
Not exactly.
I need someone who can act like my bride. She must be nice, clean, good, untainted.
We will clean her, comb out, whatever you want. This here is not a bad variant
Hey…
Hey…
Hey, hey.
Listen, she’s kinda sleepy, let’s find someone livelier.
Let’s check out the hunter’s hut.
What? There are prostitutes.
No, they found new girls.
Pimp will bring them now.
lynx yeah? Awesome. Nice interior. It’s a hunter-souteneur-collector-hunter.
Now, now, Oh, I got horny. Here, look.
Hello, hello, choose.
Should I bring more?
You have more?
Yes, but it’s the best. Need more?
No
Choose, Choose, Choose.
Seriously?
Listen, Why are you even choosing, come on, take any, they are all good. Take two of them, small and big.
How I will go with this snow white? Vasya won’t believe me.
What? I don’t understand.
What’s the problem?
No, no hard feelings, nothing…
A bit worn out, do you know how talented she is? She’s young inside.
It's exquisite! Jeanne, don’t listen to him.
All our girls are popular, you know, we don’t have all day.
Raid!
What’s going on? Garik, Garik, Garik.
Quickly, quickly
All move out through back door
Garik, Garik!
We need to jump out of window.
What? Where? It’s a bad idea.
It’s an awesome idea. I don’t want to go in jail second time!
Don’t follow me.
Run the other way.
What about bride?
What about bride?
Will find her next time!
Will find her next time!
Ok, thank you for help!
Yeah
Hello, hello
How is my future husband?
Sitting here.
Resting somewhere?
Yeah, on a feast with my relatives.
Who is laughing there?
Mom with grannie celebrating.
Did you speak with mom?
How can I? They are stuck to each other, can’t help it, for a long time.
Well OK then, say hello for me.
OK, kissing you, bye-bye
Your long drinks
That was quick
As always
Good evening
Careful.
Look, you still remember that i like Long Island
It’s not for you
But for who? For a girlfriend of yours? Where she is?
Won’t come. She’s ill.
Mitya, enough imagining, you’re...
Just seeking an excuse to see me again, you want me.
Firstly: I have a bride, Second: I don’t want you, and third:
What’s wrong? I’ve loved you, haven’t I?
Brought you to Thailand, bought you clothes, gifted a car, let me go, give me the divorce.
No
Why?
I had a vision
What vision?
Very strong.
Didn’t experience it before.
There was a stream and I stood in it knee-deep, it was very cold, then I entered it the second time and it became warm.
It was our marriage, everything will change
Nothing will change
It’s the other way around, you can’t step into the same river twice.
Are you interpreting my own dreams?
It’s obviously about you, aquarius, it’s about us. Will we go to your place or mine?
Can I borrow you for a second?
Can I borrow you for a second?
Yes of course, something wrong?
Yes of course, something wrong?
I know it sounds stupid
but
my ex-wife is sitting in the next hall.
We are together 3 years.
In short: she doesn’t give me divorce, and I need to prove her that I have someone, OK?
Can you be my bride for a while?
I guess you need a good lawyer, divorce can be done without
Can, can be done without agreement, but it’s long, I have only 2 weeks.
Really, you can save your time, I’m not allowed to enter the hall.
Why?
Do you see Yuri? If he notices that I’m moving there, then…
I’ll buy all long islands
Asya, nice to meet you.
Full name?
No, my full name is Anastasia.
So, we love each other, everything is good and nice. Can we divorce now?
What’s the rush?
He is always rusing it.
Especially sex.
I didn’t even manage to finish a thought, and he’s already standing up and putting on his pants.
We don’t have such problem. He is like: yo-ho-ho.
It will change, believe me.
I can say a lot about him. Do you know how many diseases he has?
What diseases? Stop imagining.
You are allergic to fish.
You have one foot in the grave.
We went to a resort.
He just sniffed fish, and his body started swelling, gums itching, he had to pierce trachea, blood everywhere.
I laughed so hard.
Are you ok?
Yeah, yeah I’m fine, thanks.
Where did she go?
You speak nonsense, so she got offended.
So? Can we divorce?
Yeah, since you have someone, I need to find someone as well.
Do seek.
Who will you offer?
What do you mean offer?
From your friends
You want me to seek you a husband?
I know what you want, you know what I want, who I want.
You need a psychiatrist, Vasya.
No, I need someone who will love me very much...
...someone who will love me...
...like Pasha.
So, let’s celebrate our divorce and invite him there, and there...
I will catch him, and he will be mine.
What is this?
5 minutes ago, you wanted to get me back. I was your stream.
All still remains, you are stream, you must bring me a fish. And he is a fish by the sign of zodiac.
He swam to me in my dreams, hugged my feet and warmed me up.
Your fish.
O? Signs are everywhere, you see? Thanks.
Who are you?
Call Pasha please
But who are you?
I’m his old friend
Which one?
Surprise
Pasha
Ah?
Here is one of your dumbass friends
Which one?
I don’t know which one, tell me
Pasha
Yes?
Hello
Hello, who are you?
It’s Mitya
Ah Mitya, hello
So, how are you?
Nice, standing here, breathing air
Yeah, the weather is awesome, we had +20 on last week, ?
Are you sane?
Me? Yes
Pasha
Hello?
Open the door
I can’t open now, I’ll better step outside to you.
What will you do?
I’ll open the door to Miya.
No
What if something is up
It’s 11 o’clock you need to drink herbal tea
I’ll drink it on the way.
Hello
What, how are you?
I’m fine, how are you?
Fine
In short, I have a deal to you
Speak
I have problems with Vasya
Have you had a fight?
We still can’t divorce
And, how I can help?
Remember you had affair in school?
Affair?
She still can’t forget it.
Yeah?
She lost her mind, says you are the man of her dreams
Why do you think so? I affect women in a certain way.
Can you hit on her with her for me?
I can’t, Kira will kill me.
I’m not asking you to have sex with her, just pretend, and I will slip the papers for divorce.
What are we supposed to speak of?
Don’t you know how it’s done? Just drink and you will figure it out.
I’d drink but I quit drinking. I do yoga.
Pavel
Yes?
Pavel, what’s going on?
Your wife?
Yes
Hello, Kristina, how are you?
Yes
Kira
Hello, Kristina, how are you?
Kira
Kira
Kira
It’s my classmate, also he is leaving right how
No, I don’t, I just got here. Came to you, to know how do you do. How?
Is he sick?
No, he isn’t, it’s his stress from train.
Go home quickly, your legs are bare.
Ok, fine.
You are wearing pants.
And? Let’s go. When do you want my help?
The day after tomorrow.
I can’t after tomorrow, we are going to the theatre
What? Which theatre?
Ok, let’s go.
Where is meat?
We don’t eat it
How don’t you eat meat? In the past you ate dung with bare hands
Quiet, Kira may hear us
That’s all dude, enough, this weekend we will take off properly: vodka, bathhouse, stuff like this
Yeah I want to take off as well, but Kira will kill me first.
Listen, you will call taxi and their car will knock me.
Agree
Agree
Why do you whispering like girls?
Nothing, I wanted to go out and show…
Taxi can’t find me, circling around
I know where the entrance is, so I can show
Show from the balcony, you don’t need to go anywhere. OK?
Yes, yes you right.
Where is your taxi, did you call it?
Maybe it’s around the corner. Maybe you jump from balcony?
Agree
Don’t even think about it, I won’t let you go anywhere
I didn’t want
What are you afraid of? That he will run away from you?
Shouldn’t have said it
It’s ok, I figure it out. Listen, you act like a Hitler, I swear to god.
Pasha, your wife is being insulted in her own house.
It’s my home.
Pasha
But don’t insult her.
Ok. Tell to your fuhrer then, to slow down.
That’s it Pasha, him, or me, right now
Do you even think?
I didn’t even a second
Enough! I will take my friend to the theatre, understand?
And will show you how to party, and you can, do whatever you want.
Asya, Asya Listen I need your help, just for one night.
Why do you look at me me? Like you saw a dead man.
I guess I just did
Who is it?
This? It is, sort of , boyfriend… of mine.
Sort of boyfriend?
Listen, It’s not important what will come next, you need to understand that nothing happened between us.
You didn’t tell him anything, yes?
I was a boxer for 10 years, trained to hit painfully and without traces, get it?
How?
I can show you.
Dude, think about it, what if you will regret this? Or maybe
I’m sorry, did you want to tell me something?
Ow, it hurts.
I’m sorry, did you want to tell me something?
Ow, it hurts.
Dude if you touch me again, I am warning you.
You have smashed my face.
Not a scratch. How?
Two years in police.
Shall we continue?
Dude, I didn’t want to hit on your girlfriend, why you can’t get it?
Yes? Than what do you want to do?
Simply business. If she will play the role of my girlfriend I will pay big money.
What?
Repeating: I need to divorce my ex-wife, money is not a problem
You want to buy me? Huh? Me and my girlfriend?
Kind of yes
She would be just playing a role
Yes
Not for real
Yes
I will be nearby
Yes? I mean no. I am her boyfriend. How you will be nearby
I am her boyfriend.
But my ex thinks that it’s me
Ah, yeah. Then I will observe you from a distance
What do you say?
That you both are crazy
What do you mean?
What if.
You will be her brother, you looks similar. Like dog and it’s owner.
So it’s true, years living together makes people closer.
Similar, yeah, if I will play her brother, you will pay me as well.
No, you are the brother, so brotherly help.
Hey, enough.
Stop, stop. stop, wait, don’t you think it went too far? You pay him for me?
Like.
Yes.
Nastya, don’t worry. It’s funny. We will receive money and solve all our financial problems.
Maybe not all, partially.
Solve all financial problems, it doesn’t matter to you what to spend the money on, right?
Either to patch your mug or doing the thing.
Ok, ok, don’t punch him, ok? I agree
Thank you
Does your face hurt? He touched you?
No... yes
Hurt you with non-contact technique?
No
Hurt?
Yes
I see that it hurts
Pay the deposit
You asked for place for a party? Here is it. Mitya, Marusya.
Hello
Don’t know, man, cook, maybe was hired recently. Huge main hall… we have.
Ah, bathroom, in a comfy distance. I am showing…
We will have a banquet here.
It’s a nice place for a party.
Yeah guys? You can do here whatever you like, look.
Take undersheet, it just doesn’t tear, get it? It tears, but even when it tears, you can continue to tear it.
Take, chair, it’s reusable…
Marusya doesn’t even blink, stone-woman, you can go in intelligence with her.
So think, think about it, not long, we don’t like to wait.
Hello?
What’s there? Did you find a place for company party?
Looking for it
Sea fish
Stop looking, I have a grand idea, go to our place, it’s nice here.
In some sort of shack?
Hello?
I don’t want a shack
Hello?
I want a civilized environment
What shack? WTF?
I live in the house my grandad left us, can party here, invite the whole village
Put the speakers and the table outside, the whole village will celebrate.
And what are you planning? Tell me where will you go?
Uhh, thought about restaurant.
Are you dumb, ah?
You what? Did you see from what they are cooking?
All is genetically-modified.
Potato, did you see it?
Like watermelon, growing it half of my life, watering it, fertilising it, I never had such potato in my life, get it?
And the carrot? Israeli, doesn’t fit in mouth, you tried it? No?
No
And don’t even attempt, because I tried.
In short, here’s the deal, want it or no, get to ours.
We’ll organize everything, you only need to drop the money and all will be fine
That’s all bye.
So?
Is there anything else except fish?
Ah… What else you need? It says mirror carp.
Nothing except fish, river, sea all fresh, transported by train, phosphor, calcium.
I am allergic to fish.
Then, it’s sad. Yeah
Now, wait, one second. You both look great.
Here.
Ok, watch him to get there safe.
Uh, uh, uh, wait, wait… Careful… Ok, bye.
Are you ready?
Now I will finish this and we’ll sit…
What is this?
Flowers
Why?
For you to better fit in role. There was a granny that sold flowers, wool socks on the street, so I bought flowers.
Socks could be useful too.
Ok. How did we met?
On a bus stop.
A bus stop?
I carried pies to grandma… And…
Met on a bus stop on the street and…
And understood everything
I was driving by, you stood
Yes, freezing
Warmed you up in the car. It’s important to listen each other, if I will start lying, you join.
Physical disadvantages
?
And advantages… Uh ok. Personal touch.
I have a scar from appendicitis
Scar? Classic, but it was minor scar, but here is a super scar.
Why?
Because there is a love story behind it.
He punched you?
No. He carried me on sled.
Oh
Do you record it?
Uh yes.
Uh we rode from a hill that was in the yard and crushed into house and my foot just impaled on razor…
So, he left the sled, grabbed me and carried me home…
Yeah, was a hero.
I thought, a real man, worthy to marry.
Then he carried me, put down before door, rang and hid away, cause was afraid that my parents will punish him.
Also I have a tattoo.
Show it
It is necessary? Yes?
But don’t tell anyone what you saw.
What’s going on here?
I showed, tattoo...
...to become better acquainted
To know facts
Preparing
To catch each other, to pass all normally
Recording.
We need to play lovers after all. I totally don’t like here
I don’t like him
I don’t like him too, let’s go
Maybe I order you a taxi?
No, not needed
But you are drunk
You care? I managed to get here, I will return back, I can go anywhere
Max, calm down
Ok, Universe,
Forget about him, we don’t need it, all what I have asked, all prayers...
...we recallocate on this young person.
In short, why I even explain it? We talked about it pretty long time.
I want a man with money and status, you get it? Yes? Yes. Thank you universe
Kira, Kirochka.
I have learned how to do your pose, do you remember it? Shvan… Shvansman… san.
Something like this. Look, do I stand straight? Kira.
Kirochka, you really don’t want to go with us?
I. Go. To the theatre.
Cuts like a knife, my love.
Did I tell you?
Told
Did I warn you?
Warned
Did I tell you, that it’s Petrus Brancelcaltus himself. The best underground director in Europe?
And it’s not just my opinion, It’s an Afisha (website)’s opinion.
Uh, yes...
Do you get that this person creates plays once in 5 years?
Yes
But you want something else
You want to eat bread with garlic, you want to swim in goo with pigs, here, degrade, but I will go to theatre
What a sorrow!
What?
I say, enjoy, my love.
Sector clear.
Don’t forget the product
Pash
Hey
Pasha
I usually dress to match her. Is it fine for you?
Hey, don’t touch this picture
Is it her, yes?
Yes it is, yes, please don’t touch it, she wouldn’t like it. Don’t polish it, simply stay away
Hello, what do you do?
Decided to visit my friends.
Tell to them about wedding
Ah, you have a bachelor party?
Kind of
Ah, who are your friends?
Aaah. one of them banker, other a businessman.
Mmm, that’s ok. Listen, invite them on our wedding
I don’t know if they can make it.
I will come if you will.
What the rush?
Can’t wait till the evening?
Now, will drink a shot and then go
Ok, sunshine bye. Maybe you hold up till the party?
What? When the party starts. I need to be ready. Pour it.
I didn’t flirt with...
...strangers
Was all the time with Kira, with her is easy, she tells me yes and I do it… Why you poured so little? More.
To get going.
Come on. Why so little.
Aren’t you gonna get wasted, sir?
Guy, I know my limits.
I’m immortal!
Everything is fine guys
Why did you drive this fast?
I just was in hurry, I had an call, honestly, It wasn’t on purpose.
Pasha, how are you?
Suddenly fell down.
You were smashed by a car.
My god, is it ok?
It is, but look at your leg.
It points to wrong direction.
Whatever, I’m flexible. I’m yogi.
It points to wrong direction.
Whatever, I’m flexible. I’m yogi.
Let’s go to hospital Pasha
Boys, I am fine.
Please don’t call the police, they will send me home. I can’t be at home right now.
Watch where you drive.
Small family 35 people
35, you will go to jail for sure
Listen, what did you expect, you came to Russia - you need to learn the rules, laws, understand?
I learn, learn, look there in the glove box, look. See, book, russian culture, love it, learning poems
Wait, he is passing out
Pasha
Guys he left somewhere
Smirnov, where did you do? What happened to you?
Nothing, I, got cut.
By yourself?
Yes
Move your finger
It’s fine
Attempted suicide Smirnov
What attempt?
Decided to cut vein
What attempted suicide?
I can see it
If I do attempt, I finish it… I, eeh, slipped, was going and got cut
Let looney-house take care of you, added you to a watch list
No no no no, no it can’t be.
What do you mean can’t be? Cutting veins is ok, but being in watch list - is not?
No, no, I can’t be on the watch list, because…
Enough
I have cut him
What does this mean?
He broke our friend’s leg and I cut him for this
Ok, Smirnov, sit and wait. You will be summoned
Sit down
Calm down
Where are you always going
It’s fine
No, isn’t
Calm down, calm down
Show me your hand
Here she is, here. I cut myself because of her
Guys, guys look it’s again on the right place, like new, points forward
What did they say?
Said, that it have multiple fractures and shard injuries
Doesn’t matter, can you walk?
They said to wait hospitalisation.
What are you doing?
We don’t have the time. Come on
Wait, wait
We are late to the party, come on, it will heal itself later
Start a car, quickly
Wait, I’m thirsty
Let’s go
Not bad here, authentic
How grandad left it, it still stands, we didn’t change anything important, saving traditions, yes?
Family
Grandad was not a designer
He was a miner
That’s how it is. Underground style in everything. Did you heard about feng shui?
If your ex will continue it, Max wont handle
Max will handle if he want to get money
Max, what are you doing?
Chopping wood, according feng shui
Listen, what if you feed the pigs?
Oh, good idea, feeding pigs with her, set a pig tour for her
Pig-tour? Are you serious?
That’s all, bye
Here it is. Farm.
Quails. They produce small eggs, when they lay, it slides.
Smells gross
Uh yeah, smells. Here is hen with chickens, look how small they are, like furry keyfob
What is it? Is it mini-pig?
Eeh no, it’s just pigs, which, listen, maybe you won’t grab it?
My friend have one of these. Will you move to my place?
He will start to worry. Don’t.
Max, didn’t you feed the pigs?
Nothing, they are biting
Again?
She stuck her nose there, but it bit.
Why did she have to go around, poking here?
I don’t know, she thought that it’s a mini-pig, but it teared half of her nose.
Give her plantain.
What plantain, she’s bleeding.
Noone has asked her to touch anything
Why are you starting
Fool
We have arrived!
That’s all, you can go
Let me help, Mitya, get it
Fatty
Guys, is the toilet outside?
Kinda yes
What will happen to me? Won’t I infect with rabies?
No you won’t. They’re all vaccinated. Aren’t they Max?
Yes, some of them. Didn’t you see the mark behind pig’s ear?
What mark?!
Quiet, quiet, relax, alright, ready, you are beautiful
You have losses as well?
What about you?
Come here
Hey, hey Vasya, what happened?
I was bitten by a snake, that’s what happened
Wife’s brother, I mean bride’s, husband
Do you have something?
Starting?
Of course we are starting, I’ve noticed quickly that you are fine fellows, aren’t you?
How is he without me?
He is fine, but because of you, because of your water, we will stand in this queue all evening.
Maybe I had to go with him?
You did it right, men must be educated.
Yes
Otherwise they will start to rule you. Do you need it?
No
Feeling surround? We made a visor here specifically to direct sound inside.
Pour it in glass and force him to drink
Vasya, this person came from hospital
And?
He took medicine, antibiotics. Mixing antibiotics with alcohol is forbidden.
Listen here. If you won’t keep our terms, you won’t get the divorce. Never
Give me this. Guys, let’s drink it pure.
I offered the same. Suggested it before. Here, for what we will drink?
For true man’s friendship
Stop guys, stand still, for men need to drink like men. While standing
While standing
Can I drink without standing?
While standing
Let him stand
So… Let us be, guys
For manly friendship
Cool, bad, you drink like a girl. Ok, since it’s all like this - look…
Come on, darling, hold the cucumber.
Like a tear it’s pure.
Oh
Bravo
Here, check it out
Well done
Take it please, s'il vous plaît. Ok, let’s do sauna?
Oh! It’s nice
I want there too
And me
You can’t go with your leg.
Then I don’t want
Sister, what kind of man did you find? He can’t drink vodka, he doesn’t want to soar in sauna, not a man but woman
But I earn like a man
Seriously?
So what?
What does it give you? Making you a man?
Another thing makes a man, get it?
So like this
Progress equalized us all. What did a rich person have in the past? Mirror, salt, mobile phone came after.
You are wearing a shirt for 300 dollars, yeah, but I wear a shirt for 300 rubles.
But in fact we are both dressed, get it?
What car you have, BMW perhaps? I have out native.
But anyway 90 km/h is law of Russian Federation equalized us all and faster than 90 you can’t drive, get it?
What else do you have? What, tell me? I have a house, farm, fine girl…
Had
Had, she died 4 years ago.
Horrible
What about travelling? For example, I like to travel around the world. You need money for this.
It’s fine to travel in Russia for me, have you traveled on a yacht? Nastya and I, we like collecting mushrooms.
Quitting area of comfort, it’s good.
Keep yourself in tonus, it will be useful for you taking into account the circumstances.
What circumstances?
You will have to work in garden alone.
What you say?
Nastya will go with me to the city, didn’t you think she will hang out in this hovel.
Enough, you have carried him on your back, no longer.
Let’s drink for the family
Yes, let’s drink for it.
I love my brother-in-law can’t handle myself.
Call me brother
My little brother
Brother
Little brother, let’s have a Bruderschaft drink, yes?
Forgot to clink glasses.
Your face is so familiar, we need to soar in sauna, yes, soar, ah?
I’ll better go with Nastya.
Better with me.
I mean, I’ve installed new furnace and you won’t figure out.
Now I will show it, oh, and will soar your eyes, come on.
I’ll show furnace, and after he will return
Wait
Remember we are family
Come here
We are family, we are family
Wait
With who you’ll come in bath? Ah?
Come here!
Slowly, slowly
Wait
I won’t give you money, you hear?
Whom will you go to sauna with again?
With her, not you. We had an agreement?
I need to be there.
I need to be there, I need to nudge Pasha, he is like a panda, understand? Not capable of reproduction
I don’t give a shit about you or your panda, sucker.
I’m too shy to ask, but what am I paying you for?
Whom?
You
Me? You aren’t paying me anything, you are paying to my girlfriend. For the table, my house, but not me.
Come on.
Did you think about getting a job?
Why do I need it? I am earning enough, look.
You’re almost like a golden hoof. I punch you and you give me money.
Come on, come on, ooo, you have more here, al
All
Well done
Like the smell? Fine?
Alisa hello
Hello honey, how are you? Going to sleep
So early?
I am in province. Here, when alcohol market closes everyone goes to sleep.
Did you talk to mom?
Mom was in a rush today, I didn’t catch her.
I mean, not much time left and we gotta prepare.
Talk to her.
Tomorrow, I’ll talk tomorrow
Fine, kiss you, love you, bye
Yeah, yeah, till tomorrow, kiss
Hot guy, you are a king
Spanish dances. It’s yours
Elemental dances
It’s tequila
Where a salt?
Salt we don’t need
Harick, Harick, you wanted to soar, go, Max is waiting you, go and soar! Do you hear me? Go away
Get back
What are you doing?
Listen, let me go. it’s my new strategy, understand? Make him envy.
Are you sure?
Of course, look at him, his feelings burn, passion and love, get it?
Let’s make out with you as well, to make him envy because of us, will you dance?
No Vasya, I don’t dance
What do you mean? You liked it before
My Nastya just don’t like it
What honey?
I told about dances
I love dances very much. What we will dance?
Yes
What?
Sweating good
Let me pour more water
Nice muscle
Apparently, I didn’t exercise a long time, but the muscles still remember, here is the bicep, very hard, touch it
Feeling it?
Just like stone
Trained it in the garden
Who is beating first, huh?
Are you sure? Is buying it? Can it be believed?
I think yes, let’s continue
Isn’t it too much? Isn’t it, Mitya?
Carry on dancing
Bravo!
It’s incredible
Just awesome, main thing is how director with simple interactions showed the essence of person’s soul-searching.
He didn’t call
Why does he need to call, he is with girls already, maybe having fun there.
No, Pasha isn’t like this
Oh, they all not like this. You have a tracker. Look, look where he is
Now
Uff, nice
What are you planting in this garden?
What? What’s your interest?
I am agronomist, a bit, just an amature.
Seriously? Planting what?
One idea, it just requires special care.
Tomato?
Something like this. Just more profitable, very profitable
What is more profitable than tomato?
What are you dancing? Like not a family. Kiss her husband. Come on, come on.
Are they kissing? Is it passion for you?
I’ll show you what is passion. Pasha.
Pasha
We need to make a coffee for him.
Now, I will do it now.
I’ll help
Instant?
Do you have ground?
Now
Let me help
Nooo
It’s fine
What is it?
I distributed leaflets for “mirror carp”.
Mirror carp, cool place
Yes, don’t you think she suspected something?
Of course, not a surprise with acting like yours
I did my best, you just can’t imagine how hard it is to fall in love with you
I managed...
I mean, acted like I did
You’re rushing it.
Mh?
You can’t put coffee on that much fire, it needs to progress slowly
Your money - my money, your bank - my bank, your card - with my name on it
What is it?
Nothing
Why is it so cold here?
Where is Mitya?
Making coffee, everyone went home
What about you?
Me? Nothin’
Why are you waving hands?
I’m guarding you, keeping mosquitos away
Ok
Did you get drunk?
I didn’t, just fresh air mellowed me
Mellowed?
Yeah, I got tired
Let’s go lay down, I’m tired too
Where we will lay?
Do you even think what you are saying? Lay, you have a husband, I have a wife. And your husband is my best friend.
Mitya
It’s just a formality
At first, get rid of this formality, get all paperwork done, then do whatever you want… don’t do it.
Let’s go then in hay barn, I will sign everything.
Yeah?
Yes
Sign all today?
Of course, right after.
Ok, let’s go
Go
Go, will you sign right now? And everything right, each document?
Let’s go, I just slip to the toilet, and be right back.
I’ll wait you here.
You think I won’t return?
But I will
Will see
I’m going
Why did you break up with Vasya?
She cheated
Well …
Locals...
Sad that we met so late
Why late?
Just I…
What’s up?
What’s up with you?
We are making ... coffee… for everyone.
Where is Vasya?
She went crazy. She’s pulling me to the hay barn
We don’t have a hay barn
Good you don’t have it. But do you have a toilet?
Yes
Show it
I’ll show it
Planting will be on immigrants, I have samples.
We only need to set a contact, we don’t need to do anything.
We need to inject a business idea, if you have connections in the club.
Yeah, I have all the connections in the club
Hello, where are you going?
Where are you going?
We are going to the toilet
We are going to do some stuff
What stuff?
Different stuff there, Harick needs it. Continue the party without us, we will handle some deals
I want to pee
Ok, we going
Shit, almost got caught
Wait, I’ll just take product
The light?
The lock got stuck, wait a sec.
Is it something illegal?
What? No, the opposite. Yes?
Legal
All legal and fine
Are you sure?
Sure
Put the bag on the back seat
Where are you going? To the club?
Even if so, so what?
They have betrayed you, you owe them money
How? Betrayed?
Calm down… don’t be nervous. Nobody have betrayed me, here chew this gum.
What are you talking about? I’m trying to restruct the debt.
Maybe you don’t need to do stuff that you can’t even spell?
What are you talking about? I’m trying to restruct the debt.
Maybe you don’t need to do stuff that you can’t even spell?
How to flush?
You are my little. Decided to hide away? Yes? Now I will wash you
You always ruin my business ideas. Yes, business and I was chosen to be the co-founder.
Who choose you?
Who choose you. He. And now we are going toward to success
Why you don’t want to get a normal job, like everyone?
Like who? Like who of everyone? Pouring drinks to alcoholics? Flirt with them?
Actually it’s our only source of income. Also pigs and the garden, which is on me as well.
What? Go away, did you just money shamed me? I will return everything to you till the last penny.
And since we’re here, we are breaking up, got it? Divorce. Because I don’t need…
Divorce?
And since we’re here, we are breaking up, got it? Divorce. Because I don’t need…
Divorce?
Yes, yes. I don’t need a girl that doesn’t believe in my economy. That’s all, pack your stuff and make conclusions.
Nastya, where is Pasha?
Please look at my back, am I dirty?
No, clean
Oh, so hot.
Mitya, Mitya!
Mitya isn’t here, he is busy. Why?
He couldn’t just fall down. Actually could
Yes?
Yes. It happened, just not with this toilet
Mitya, Mitya!
Did you hear it?
It's from there?
So good, can I get warm here?
It’s occupied. I think I’ll go.
Don’t!
Vasya,
Calm down, seriously, enough, no, stop, stop
Shit, we are late, they are probably having sex already, even windows fogged up.
It is a sauna, it must be this way
Ah, really?
Vasilisa! Vasya. Pasha.
Where are you going?
Why you didn’t move closer?
If they notice us on this car they won’t even start to talk.
Shut the windows.
Hey, put the product back, listen. On the first meeting better not to flash it.
My palms itch - we’ll get money for sure.
I like bath
Good, warm
Distracts me
Mitya knocking again, maybe he is cold? We need to…
Forget
It rubs better
Yes
What’s this?
Moving to plan B
Should I catch the rhythm?
What rhythm?
Rhythm
Play to remove his boner.
Vasya, everything is fine for me, really. I have a family.
I’m a happy person, do you understand Vasya?
I don’t need all this.
Don’t do it, don’t do it
Otherwise will have to pull the worms out of a bush
What is it?
Dark night
I love my wife, understand?My Kira
Relax, please
Remember Kira
Her head torn away
Vasya, no, please.
Vasya, let me go, jesus, why they are screaming so loud?!
I’ll fucking shoot them!
Oh, they shut up?
What is this trash?
Wife
Not knife
Take it you bastard
Kira, Kira
Take it stupid
Enough, enough, calm down. Get away.
What are you doing? Did you punch me? You saw, he punched me.
Calm down, I’m helping my friend.
What are you doing? Did you punch me? You saw, he punched me.
Calm down, I’m helping my friend.
Nothing has happened
Yes?
Yes
Yes?
Yes
Something went wrong I need to be…
Vasya, let’s go home
Something went wrong I need to be…
Vasya, let’s go home
I need to be alone
Vasya, let’s go home
I need to be alone
Wait, wait.
She need to reset.
Oh, stream.
Tell me how to be.
Hello, they are here?
Who?
Head of it
No
Come on, reschedule next meeting, and we will wait here
500 rubles. From each
What? Your name?
Vladislav
Vladislav who? Who?
Vladislav Vladislav
So, Vladislav, now you should escort us to the VIP, and start searching a new job
See how much money? Smell it? Ah?
To earn some money, you need to spend it.
Now we should order the most costly drinks.
And manifesting girls, not those bitches.
Girls, just in case, we are there.
Yes, I am there, looking at you
What are you doing?
Nothing
Listen
Is it goulash? Hm? Yes?
Yes
M, goulash
But you are vegetarian
Don’t move closer
Don’t eat this crap, I’m begging you
Shut up and speak what you want to
Nothing happened
Nothing? Them answer to me on one question, why she was naked?
It’s a sauna... Because she wanted
And you didn’t want!
And I didn’t
And because she was naked. Fucking liar
I don’t lie, seriously
Dirty animal
I’m telling you there was nothing.
Maybe just one kiss
Bastard!
It was purely historical. I have kissed he, thought, what if it is love. Stop, enough, enough!
Onion
Listen, what are you doing, don’t eat onion. We won’t be able to kiss during whole week
I will never kiss you in my life!
Very tasty onion!
Enough, enough I’m telling you! Calm down!
I am a man here!
You are ugly
Maybe we’ll better wash first?
No, with her you were clean, with me will be dirty
It’s my day?
It’s my day?
I have asked a fine day at the morning!
I have asked a fine day
Because, it doesn’t matter how much you have asked, if you act like a bitch - you won’t get anything
Fishy? My fishy
I’m a carp
Sorry I don’t see so well
In short.
Stop acting like a bitch. Stop making fun of everyone. Give him a divorce. And everything will be ok.
Where you came from, carp?
From there
And why now?
Because... because I’m sending you teachers, prophets but you are getting nothing, and because of it I came personally.
Sorry
And I has come, but I don’t have much time, listen here. Leave your ex and leave Pasha.
But Pasha is just..
What with Pasha
We are a perfect pair with Pasha, understand? I have checked the horoscope, calendar, got it?
And?
We are compatible for 83%, It is love
Horoscopes are bullshit
No
I am a fish, I won’t advice a bad thing
Yes
That’s all
Thanks.
Seems like it worked, go and sign your papers, you are free
Nastya, Nastya
Yes?
Nastya, Nastya
Yes?
I need to tell you something
What happened?
I wanted this divorce so badly because in 2 weeks I will marry in Moscow
Marriage?
Cool.
Your marriage?
Yes
Congratulations… with it…
So if marriage then - cool, cool, super.
Excuse me that I didn’t tell you before, just…
Mitya, don’t, whatever, said now or before, give me the fish, and I will go.
I need to go, Max with his business, I need to go there
Nastya
Don’t think it is a dramatic farewell with fish, I really need to go
Nastya!
Universe! Take me!
Nastya!
Yes! I’m yours!
Hello
Hello Alisa, I am not ready to marry
What?
I am not prepared for marriage
You want to delay it? Is it because father hurried?
No, I want to cancel it.
Sorry
Didn’t two guys come here? One in a suit, second with a cap on.
Ah, got it.
Here came again this…
Fine one in this time
I don’t get it?
You are the call girl, for this one, wearing the cap
Yeah, I will go work
Sure
Nastya, stop. Wait, enough, guys, let me out.
Wait, stop, enough, why you.
It was on purpose, it was conceived, it was for work, we called the girls to lift the status of this deal.
Lifted?
Yes, now is fine, money will come. No need to hitchhike
Max what are you telling me?
Come on, enough
Half an hour ago you told me...
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
Move along
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
...that we are parting our ways, your dream came true.
What is it with you? Why you so angry? I can’t get it
It’s all because of
Stop it, all and nothing. Stop, enough, why? Huh? Just stop
Are you really so stupid, Max? Do you not understand?
I understand. I understand that can’t be without you, without your eyes, without your nose.
Nastya.
Max what are you doing? What are you doing?
I hang.
I am down see? I fall off, you dropped me down
Get up
Step on me, right on my chest, like on poop
It’s nonsense
Help me, you hear?
Not convinced
Stop!
Go grab someone’s ass, maybe your “status” will get up.
Stop it.
Hide your phone, put this phone away! You didn’t get it?
I, Dimon, will come back and break your legs and slam your car.
Wait, really, enough
Get lost
Enough!
Do I need to lay before you half of my life, yes?
What’s with you, bitch, what?
Now you will sit in car and drive home, you get it?
Because I’m not going to seek you this night, sit in car, in the car I said.
You’ve lost your mind.
Whom you leave our house with?
Do you want to say that right now there are other people at home?
I am asking you!
You…
Happy? Huh?
Do you think you will find a good man here?
Hell no, there are no good guys.
And after me you don’t get anyone. I will gossip such stuff about you.
Why are you laughing?
Do you understand that this is it, Max?
Go to hell
What?
Dimon just wanna to race
Max, please enough.
Max.
Where are you going? Come on, come on, let’s race
Max, what are you doing?
Where are you going?
Asshole.
How are you?
Now.
How to call the ambulance? Don’t touch her, you here? Let professionals to do it
If we leave her here she will bleed out
Now
Hold it
She is bleeding
Easy, easy
I will call the ambulance, police, insurance
What a starry sky
Yeah
Will you fly with me?
Where will you go now without me?
Are you insane? Where did you bring us?
Entrance from the other side
Ah
Ole
Calm down
Ole ole ole, Russia, is the champion
Sit here
Yes
BP
You again, hello
Hello
How do you do?
Complicated
Very?
To marry one girl.
I broke with the other.
Meanwhile falling in love with a third. .
And additionally almost broke my friend’s marriage.
Best friend’s.
Something like this.
Today I pushed one person and he broke a bottle on my head, check it out?
Smirnov
Me
Let’s go
Hello
So
I am a relative
Wait for the doctor
I will sit there
Yeah…
How are you?
Yes, a hard situation.
Such...
...a set of circumstances happened.
You know what I understood?
That relationships is work.
Work on yourself.
That’s all, I have grabbed someone, that’s enough.
You’re doing it right dude, right, in any uneasy situation, you marry and the girl is yours.
Dude, I need to do it like you.
In short, she will exit and I will do a marriage proposal.
Flowers are here, you will be a witness.
What will you say, agree?
Hey old man, you have mistook me for someone man
Let my friend go
Listen, I’m boxer, I hit without a trace at all
And I am a paratrooper, you hear? Choking with traces
Who is a related to Naumova?
He is
You can walk in
And we will go with my colleague to wander
Just don’t hit him very hard
Me?
It’s over
I will do it only educational purposes
It’s over
Very softly
You know Bakunin?
Ah?
Do you know Bakunin?
Bakunin? Is he a paratrooper?
It will be better they said.
Close your eyes, close. I’m doing it not like with a corpse, just, whatever you want.
I had...
...a thing in the past.
When someone bullied me, I closed my eyes and thought that all the light faded,
So I will close eyes now and you’re all left without light
You’re back?
Brought socks to you. This time. Imagine, that granny still trades them. Also, seems like her business is getting better
What is your real reason?
Came to do marriage proposal to a girl.
M, so fluffy
Warm
Yeah, thought better this time?
Yes, sure, 100%
Good
Happy for you
Don’t forget socks
Flies are low.
The rain will fall.
What, let’s plant?
Come on, do second dowl
Throw, throw
I’m throwing
A bit, a bit, one drop, by one.
My great grandmother always asked help from earth. To make it more fertile
Head.
My Rus, homeland, looking on you like on my second half.
With you black mother, been everywhere, why you don’t do anything? Plants aren’t raising
Harick, stop it.
I’m not Harick, I am Ilia
Harick, stop it.
I’m not Harick, I am Ilia
Ilia, doesn’t-grow-shit-for-ya!
Come on, come on.
Ilia, doesn’t-grow-shit-for-ya!
Come on, come on.
Now, pal. Dig for now
Smells like shit
Shit. Maybe they gave us bad shit?
What’s wrong with you?
Listen, what with me? I just came and bought
Why are you laughing? You also wanted to build a greenhouse
And we will build it, I will build
Fuck you, you won’t get it
Listen, they will raise the third time, I feel it
Come here
Wait
Come here!
Running on pricy product