Gui che (2021) - full transcript

During a police raid led by the bent cop Feng and his men, Feng's buddy Chiang gets another idea after seeing the offenders' prized possession. He takes the diamonds, skipping town to a distant village to lie low. Feng has no choice but brings his men Monk and Yang to retrieve the diamonds in 48 hours. Oddly enough, Chiang's cell phone signal suggests that he is in the village, but Feng cannot find him anywhere. Feng can only begin dealing with the seemingly innocent yet weird villagers, entailing everyone playing mind games on one another. Amidst this chaotic situation, a female ghost shows up, making it even worse - Can Feng eventually discover the truth and get his buddy back? Good or evil, the uncertainty leaves everyone unsettling and suspicious.

This unlucky brat is Chiang.

He's my buddy.

I don't know what I did to him
in my last life.

But whenever he starts
running out of luck,

I'm the one who gets all stressed out.

001.

This is 002.

We have a civilian
calling on the suspect's location.

Go and check it out.

Copy that.

Everyone calls me Feng.



I'm a police officer.

They say police are scumbags with a badge.

So instead of saying I'm a police officer,

I would prefer to be a trickster.

For me,

I'm a police officer
not because I want to do justice.

It's just that I get to do things

more conveniently.

Boss!

Police investigation.

Stay where you are.

The one who pulled the trigger
out of the blue is Psycho.

I'd love to chop his hand off.

Just stay right where you are.



Did I say it right, Boss?

How many times have I told you?

What did you say, Boss?

What did you say, Boss?

Why are you talking so loud?

You need to speak up!

He can't hear you!

And the Buddha head here.

His name is Monk.

He likes to go on and on
about ghost nonsense all day.

Darn it.

I can barely understand him.

You stupid.

Fight me!

Which one of you is in charge here?

- Me. Darn!
- Me!

- Okay.
- Shut up!

So all eight of you are leaders?

There are only seven of us.

God darn it.

Let me do a headcount.

One, two,

three, four,

five, six,

seven, eight...

God darn it!

Where the heck did you come from?

What are you doing?

- Boss, don't worry.
- Don't do anything stupid.

My bullet is faster than his knife.

You freaking turncoat.

- Feng!
- Let's fight!

- No one is bleeding.
- Are you blind?

- Darn you!
- Get lost!

Stop running!

Jump.

Jump!

Jump!

Jump!

Duck!

Duck!

Duck!

Don't do that!

My boss is going to be pissed!

Stop running!

Stop running!

Stop running!

Stop running!

My gun...

Sorry.

Like I said,

I'm a trickster.

Daren

For god's sake.

Next time, just play it casually.

Why were you acting so hard?

Look.

Sorry, man.

Of course I needed to act hard.

There were cameras all over the place.

Now, come on. Just unlock this.

Come on, my hand is hurting.

Hurry up! Give me the keys.

Darn you.

- Give me!
- Darn you.

You have the keys!

It's on you.

You sure have a lot of tricks.

I'd never lie to you.

Nice trick.

How about you make my finger grow back?

Mr. Lin, these are the guys.

So it's good police and bad police.

What am I? A pushover?

Do you think you can come down here

and get whatever you want?

Fine.

Since you're ballsy enough to extort me,

which one of you is going to pay for it?

I'll do it.

Darn!

Chiang!

Chiang!

Slow down.

Slow down.

Feng...

You were too slow.

How are we going to split the money now?

Darn it!

Awesome!

Look at your poop face.

Screw you.

I need a nap.

You're too weak.

Screw you.

Are you up for it?

Once we make the delivery to Mr. Lin,

then we'll be even.

Darn you! What the heck?

How long are you going to sleep? Get up!

Both of you, quiet!

Boss!

Boss!

Now what?

- Mr. Lin...
- Mr. Lin.

Why is there no elevator?

Sorry, traffic jam.

Is everybody here?

It must be pretty uncomfortable
tied up like this.

Cut him loose.

Such a good-looking guy.

It would be quite wasteful to cut here

and quite a pity to cut here.

Psycho!

Psycho!

Psycho!

I know you.

I heard you're quite a marksman.

If I get a gun, you're as good as dead.

Mr. Lin!

I'll take full responsibility.

Take full responsibility,

you say.

So you know something went wrong then.

I need a nap.

You're too weak.

Your call will be directed to voice mail.

To leave a quick message,

press the hash key after the beep.

Hey, Sheng!

Did you get the boat ready?

I need to skip town now.
Don't mess with me.

Call me!

Drive faster!

Son of a...

Shoot! God darn it!

Hey, Siri!

Taiwan Heavy Hitter Feng.

What can I help you with?

Call Chiang.

I don't see Chiang in your contacts.

- Who would you like to call?
- Love you to death Chiang.

Taiwan Jerk Feng

Chiang!

Stop fooling around. It's hot.

Get over here.

Where are you?

Sorry.

I was chosen as Mr. Lin's scapegoat.

I have to do this.

My buddy is in trouble.

He needs help.

For those of you who have families,

I'll help provide a proper burial.

If you get out of prison after 20 years

and become disabled,

I'll find someone

to help push the wheelchair.

- There's nothing I can do but run.
- Darn it.

Why didn't you talk to me first?

Anyway, I took the diamonds.

You can just blame it all on me.

I don't know when I'll be back.

I'll try to find a way to reach you.

Take care of yourself.

Darn.
You can't take those diamonds, Chiang...

If I don't run,
the rest of my life would be ruined.

Shoot!

Shoot!

Boss, I've asked around.

No one knows where Chiang is.

What are you doing?

Psycho!

Psycho!

Psycho!

What are you doing?

Psycho!

I'll try this finger
and see if it will be more spot on.

Spot on?

Spot, my foot!

Hey, I'm a police officer!

Look here.

Would it work?

Darn.

I wonder if it's going to aim well.

Come at me! I'm here!

Darn.

- What's that?
- What?

Do you have something to say now?

Let him go.

What is it?

You can have this.

Get me the diamonds. Get rid of Chiang.

I'm taking this guy with me.

I'll release him when I get the diamonds.

Mr. Lin!

With just the two of us left,

it will be hard to handle things.

Just call that guy downstairs.

What's his name?

Get him to help out.

Clean this up.

Darn.

- Psycho!
- Psycho!

Monk!

Put some ice on my finger.

I'll be back!

Darn it!

Hey!

Get me something to bag it up.

Hurry up!

Monk, hurry up!

The finger!

The finger...

Hurry.

Is it icy enough?

What's the best time to reattach it?

How would I know?

It's 48 hours.

Mr. Lin said he wants the diamonds

in front of him in 48 hours.

Who is this jerk?

Darn.

Excuse me!

What do you want?

Excuse me.

My car crashed in the mountains.

Is there a train station
around here somewhere?

You crashed your car?

Train station...

Around here,

the nearest one
is two to three hours away.

Besides,

the sun will be setting soon.

What are you going to do now?

Can I stay at your place for one night?

What?

Please, just one night.

Well...

I'll make it up to you.

I have some cash here.

That should do it.

- For my accommodation.
- No.

- Please don't...
- I mean it.

I'll pay. I won't take advantage of you.

I'll leave tomorrow.

First thing in the morning.

Come on, don't be rude.

Our place is pretty worn down.

But at least
there's water and electricity.

You'll have to make do for a night.

Handsome, what's your name?

We rarely get visitors here.

We're home.

Tsung, come help.

We're home.

Wait!

I'll take it myself.

Okay.

Boss.

That guy keeps tapping back there.

Is he trying to send signals to Mr. Lin?

I know Mr. Lin sent you to spy on us.

If you don't play by our rules,

I'll screw you up.

Mr. Feng.

You've got the wrong idea.

I'm not sending signals.

They found a mole
in the company last week.

We couldn't find the guy.

So we decided to vote

to see who was most likely the mole.

As it turned out,

I got all the votes.

Mr. Yang cut my finger right there.

- Mr. Yang?
- But as soon as he cut off my finger,

- the real mole's phone started ringing.
- I thought he worked for Mr. Lin?

- It's beyond me.
- Darn.

It blew my cover.

I just got my finger reattached.

It still has some nerve issues.

God darn it.

That's impossible!

You got all the votes?
What about your own vote?

Stop talking nonsense.

Of course I voted for myself.

You lunatic.

Mr. Feng!

- God darn it!
- God darn it!

Did you plant spyware
on your buddy's phone?

Such good friends.

I want to be a police officer.

It's all right.

Just treat me
like one of your errand boys.

By the way,
what's the code for this operation?

Actually, I've always wanted
to be a good guy.

I didn't have a chance before,

but I can make my own decision now.

So I've decided

to be a good guy.

Who's that?

Do you know what he does?

It's all right.

He's called Mr. Feng.

He's only staying for the night.

Don't worry about it.

Dinner is ready.

Okay.

Don't mess with his stuff.

Fine.

Just ignore him.

Hao Chiang.

His name is not Mr. Feng.

Go and check the bathroom.

He has been there for quite some time now.

Tell him to come and have dinner.

Okay.

Mr. Feng.

Is everything all right?

I'm almost done here.

It's time for dinner.

Okay.

Knock it off.

It's none of our business.

Come.

Mr. Feng.

There's a police officer outside

saying he spotted a crashed car

on the side of the road.

You need to hurry.

I'm afraid I can't hold him off for long.

By the way,

what are you here for?

He's still in there.
Just a moment, please.

Sir.

I'm Officer Chen.

Is that your crashed car in the woods?

Yes!

Can you step outside
and show me your papers?

Yes, I'm coming right out.

Sir, I've checked the license plate.

It's registered under the name Hao Chiang.

You said he's Mr. Feng?

That's right.

Officer.

Just a moment. He'll be out soon.

Sir.

I'm going to count to three.

If you refuse to cooperate,
I will bust down the door.

Wait, I'm coming out!

Officer, take it easy. He'll be out soon.

One...

Two...

Coming!

Three!

I told you to invite our guest to dinner.

If he doesn't want to eat,

you don't have to force it.

He's probably just asleep.

And he's bleeding while asleep?

Should we call an ambulance?

He won't die so easily.

He smells terrible.

Did he just eat poop or what?

Why is he not up yet?

Do you mean he is not up yet

or not dead yet?

Up.

Right.

Is this

the real deal?

It looks pretty authentic.

I've never seen a diamond up close before.

Look at the size of it.

It must be worth a lot.

That is his belongings.

Don't touch it.

Finish dinner

and clean it up.

Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara

Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara

Bodhisattva Impreza

Bodhisattva Impreza

I want to be with you forever.

I-Primo, I do.

The tenth anniversary of love.
From "I" to "us."

Dear God of Love.

What should I do to get a pretty wife?

- Girls
- Girls

- like rich people.
- Like rich people.

I'm just making sure

if he's dead or not.

I know.

Let's keep this between the three of us.

Keep it down. Don't wake Tsung up.

What's up?

One.

Two.

Three!

We really killed him.

I only helped carry him.

Wait.

If we keep going on with this,

it will drag on to dawn.

I have a bold idea.

That's really bold.

Should we do it like him?

We're here.

Darn. He certainly ran a long way.

Check the house.

Okay.

Captain, there's no one here.

It stinks.

Darn it.

Sorry, it's a police investigation.

We need your assistance.

We're in search of a suspect,

named Chiang.

Have you seen this person before?

Crap, how is this man so heavy?

What's the matter?

It's a police investigation.

We need your assistance.

This sack you're carrying

looks kind of suspicious.

Open it up for inspection!

Sir.

It says corn.

You can read, right?

Officers?

Sorry about that.

My colleague is a bit of a hothead.

Who's in charge here?

You guys carry on.

We're in search of a suspect.

Have you seen this person before?

Sir.

This is a remote place.

People rarely come by.

What did he do?

Is he a criminal?

Junior.

Aren't you having a stomachache?

Me?

Yes.

Sheng.

Take these officers to the toilet.

Don't bother!

They can find it themselves.

I'm not done yet.

Please work with the investigation.

Who's that woman?

Who?

Me?

You certainly have a lot of tools here.

Sir.

This place is too small and crowded.

Why don't we step outside to talk?

What are you guys up to?

Nothing. We're just
collecting harvested corn.

We feed it to the hens
after sun drying it.

I knew it was corn.

We already told you.

Hey, junior.

Are you done yet?

Let the pro show you how it's done.

Stay right here and don't move.

Don't move!

Monk, what's the situation over there?

So far so good.

Everything is under control.

What are you cooking?

Corn.

It tastes pretty sweet.

We grow them ourselves.

You can taste it if you like.

Excuse me.

Clean it up.

Why don't you show me around?

We'll leave once I make sure
everything is all right.

Okay.

"The temple of Qidu District."

That's a long way from here.

Where are your IDs?

The person that you're looking for

is probably being abducted

by ghosts.

Yes, ghosts.

Ghosts?

I'm done talking.

Your turn.

Ghosts.

Your turn.

Did you notice that big curve
on your way here?

Yes.

Someone died there.

A woman got hit by a car a few years ago.

It was a hit-and-run.

Since then,

her ghost would often show up

looking for the person
responsible for her death.

But as you know,
she never found the person.

That was when we started to hear
the weird noises.

Right.

In this warehouse, in particular.

Therefore,

we put some wooden figures

in here

as companions for her ghost to chat with.

As weird as it may sound,

after we put the wooden figures here,

the weird noises stopped.

However...

What?

Keep going.

However,

when we come here every morning to work,

these wooden figures

would all be

facing the same direction

as if they were talking to someone.

That's all.

Right.

Senior.

How do you spell "accident"?

Why is there no signal around here?

Keep going that way
and you'll get a signal.

Lead the way.

Junior.

I got a bit too excited just then.

I need to use the bathroom

to freshen up.

Keep an eye on these guys for me.

Make sure they stay put.

The same goes for you.

Okay.

Hold this.

Keep the channel open.

- Sir...
- Don't move!

- Nothing.
- What were you saying?

Sir.

Keep going.

Sir,

we still have a lot of work to do.

Can we go out and finish them first?

Afterwards, you can ask us what you want.

How does that sound?

Get back here once you're done.

Okay.

By the way,

sir,

if I were you,

I wouldn't dare stay here by myself.

That would be all.

Then let's all stay here!

In this warehouse, in particular.

We started to hear some weird noises.

We put some wooden figures in here

as companions for the ghost to chat with.

However...

Every morning,

we'd find those wooden figures

all facing the same direction

as if they were talking to someone.

Senior, come in!

Please come in, over!

Senior, come in!

What's wrong?

Talk to me.

Senior, the wall painting!

It fell to the ground. What should I do?

God darn it!

Can't you just hang it back?

But you ordered me to stay put!

Senior!

You're charged with attempting to
terrorize a future law enforcement agent.

You have the right to remain silent.

Anything you say will be used in court.

Don't move and don't talk to me!

Don't talk to each other!

I'll put you back.

Don't talk to me.

The hammer.

Help.

Help...

Taiwan Jerk Feng

Hello?

Chiang!

Where have you been?

Feng.

Speak up.

Feng!

Wall!

I'm... A wall!

Chiang?

I know it's you.

Hello?

Where did you go exactly?

Help!

It's occupied.

Senior, I'm not using the toilet.

- Senior!
- What is it?

What did you say?

- The wall is crying out for help, senior.
- You found Chiang?

No, I didn't find Chiang.

No!

Not Chiang, I mean the wall!

- What are you talking about?
- Senior, open up!

- Stop banging on the door.
- Senior.

Stop it!

Senior!

- Senior!
- The door is going to break.

Stop banging on it! Are you deaf?

Stop banging!

- Senior!
- Stop...

What's that noise?

Senior?

Are you all right, senior?

What did you say about walls?

The wall here is down.
That wall there is crying for help.

I haven't found Chiang yet.

Fine. Let's go and check out the walls.

Hey!

Watch out for the traps on the road.

Why are there traps?

Sometimes, there are boars
and hares around.

We can make a fortune catching those.

That's poaching and it's illegal.

Sir.

If we came across a protected species,
we'd let it go.

Right.

Sorry. That's the trap.

Don't use these traps ever again!

What are you doing?

Darn you!

Is that how you treat your buddy?

Boss, are you okay?

Boss is up.

The officer is waking up.

Come on.

Have some food.

Boss, are you all right?

Sir, here you go.

Sir.

Monk.

How did I get back here?

That elder carried you back here.

He has quite some strength.

I don't think our target is here.

And you? Did you find anything?

Right, Mr. Feng.

The company
has been looking for you all day.

They said your phone is off.

They've sent over a video.

I'd like to show it to you.

Hello, sir!

Mr. Lin is afraid that

your boy
isn't being taken care of properly.

Don't worry.

Your boy is having a good time here.

You just focus on doing
what you have to do.

It's really tasty!

It's tasty, right?

Have some more.

Drink some spices too.

It will quench your thirst.

Darn those people!

My phone!

It is broken.

Boss, what should we do now?

Darn.

It's time to leave.

I need to use the toilet first.

Sir.

You haven't eaten anything.

Why don't you grab something for the road?

- What do you say?
- No, thank you.

Grab something.

Boss.

I thought we were leaving.

Monk.

How about we stay here for the night?

Sure.

But sir.

We don't have a guest room.

It's okay.

We'll just take the warehouse.

What?

You found Chiang?

If I had found him,

why would we still be here?

This thing just turned up in my pocket.

I have no idea who put it there and when.

You said the old man
carried me back today.

Yes.

By the way,

one more thing.

After I saw this today,

something weird happened.

I passed out soon after.

There's something going on here.

They've been acting weird from the start.

We just don't have any proof yet.

From my years of experience
in working cases,

there's only one possibility.

After Chiang had a car crash,

he found these farmers and asked for help.

Somehow, he died of a certain accident.

Unexpectedly, the farmers found out

he was carrying diamonds.

They wanted to keep the diamonds,

so they decided
to dispose of Chiang's body.

It's as if he had never even been here.

Then we happened to arrive

at this crucial moment.

In order to conceal the truth,

they had to hide Chiang's body...

inside the wall.

There.

I killed someone.

If it really is that simple,

Boss would have already figured it out.

I do hope my deduction is wrong.

Other than those farmers,

have you seen any other people here today?

Like a woman.

What are you looking at?

What did they tell you?

I didn't tell them anything.

I only said

the person they're looking for

might have been taken away by ghosts.

Now what?

That body could be discovered
at any moment.

Why don't we just slay them all?

What are you looking at?

Just speak your mind.

Are you all mute?

If we go to the police now

and lay it all out,

then there are no more diamonds.

They are not the real police.

Jesus loves you. God loves everyone.

Think about it.

If they knew
the suspect was here all along,

why haven't they called for backup?

How can three police
cover the entire wood?

They must be working for both sides.

I've only known Hao Chiang for so long.

He must have gotten desperate,

taken the diamond for himself, and bailed.

Hey, Sheng!

So the three police...

No, I mean...

Only the two leading officers
are the police.

They must have someone
on their side taken hostage.

The third guy is sent
to keep an eye on them.

I don't know about the first two brats.

But that third guy

is definitely not a police officer.

Why am I back here again?

They have no idea I'm not a real police.

Right?

Boss, even you've seen it.

Chiang must have been taken

by the ghost to that house.

We'll go and check the house tomorrow.

I need to smoke.

Don't come with me.

Senior.

Don't leave me here alone again.

I'm scared.

Now guys, don't panic.

Tomorrow,

after they go out,

Chi Ming and I

will move the body out

to the empty house
on the other side of the mountain.

What are you afraid of?

We have Chi Ming with us.

That woman has been sealed away.

You'll go to work in the field as usual.

If they ask,

just say we're out selling goods.

All right.

Dismiss.

Wait.

I have a question.

You have the diamond.

Will you still come back?

Darn it.

I wouldn't come back if I could just go.

Or maybe you two want to go instead?

You're the ones who started this mess
and you're now questioning me?

Your call will be directed to voice mail.

The call will be charged after the beep.

Please hang up
if you're not leaving a message.

Get rid of Chiang.

I'm taking this guy with me.

I'll release him when I get the diamonds.

May the gods bless your disciple,
Chen Chi Ming,

and that everything goes well tomorrow.

Monk.

You should get your piece ready.

I barely see you cleaning it.
It might not be able to fire at all.

Boss.

I'm only packing it for show.

I've never used it before.

Don't worry.

Senior.

Since you're not going to use it,

maybe I can borrow it.

Junior.

This is our first time working together.

I think I'll take the first gun
I've ever had

and give it to you.

Make sure to put it to good use.

Protect us

and protect yourself.

Gosh.

I can't take it. It's too precious.

Have you seen the villagers?

They are probably working in the field.

Go and have a look.

Okay.

Here's the ammo.

Hold it for me.

Sure.

This gun is a bit pointy.

Where are the other two?

Do you mean Mr. Hsu and Chi Ming?

They went down the mountains

to the farmer's market.

They are selling feather dusters.

Do you need them for something, sir?

Is that so?

They're selling feather dusters

or diamonds?

Diamonds?

I've never actually...

Just say what you want to say.

Ask what you want to ask.

Stop lying to us with that nonsense.

We're farmers.

But don't take us as fools.

Boss.

What did you say you are?

Come again?

I didn't hear it clearly.

Sir!

It's nothing.

My husband is having trouble sleeping.

So he's a bit grumpy.

Please don't mind him. I'm so sorry.

- Sheng!
- Sheng!

No wonder your breath smells so bad.

Just kidding!

Officers aren't allowed
to shoot without legit reasons.

Don't you know about that?

Don't be afraid!

Don't be afraid.

Yes, we're just joking around!

Relax.

Shoot.

Sorry, can you hold it for me?

What the...

Why?

It wasn't me.

Don't do it here.

Let's move the body first.

Did something happen?

We still have to move it anyway. Come on.

Now the gun has your fingerprints.

I can fire however I want to.

What are you talking about?
That was obviously...

Stay right there!

Assaulting a police officer
and robbing his gun.

I can shoot you on sight!

You told us Chiang was never here.

What's this then?

Sir!

We really have no idea!

I only know the person you're looking for
could be abducted by ghosts.

We got really spooked,
but we really don't have a clue.

Think carefully before you speak!

I'm going to count to three.

One!

We really don't have a clue!

Two!

Screw you!

You're putting words in our mouths!

How can I tell you something I don't know?

Three!

Darn it, who said you can get up?

I can't do it anymore.

It's too painful.

It feels like my ribs are going to crack.

Darn.

Can you hold it for me?

Monk!

Sorry about that.

I was just trying to see

if you guys were lying.

I know it went a bit too far.

If you'd like to issue a complaint,

you're welcome to do so.

Monk!

Give him your number.

My number is 35 cm.

Sorry.

Sorry, you can carry on.

- Jung...
- I'm fine.

You jerk.

Boss, your gun.

What's the matter with you?
Who told you to get up?

Just give me another chance.

Please. I'll act better next time.

Sure, just take off the bulletproof vest
next time.

I'll make you the Best Actor.
What do you say?

No vest?

I'll die.

No, you won't.

It has to be a powerful sage

who wrote these scriptures here

to suppress the evil spirits.

The scripture on the right

is already worn out.

That's bad.

Some evil spirits must have escaped.

Senior got scared
the heck out of him yesterday.

Boss!

Did you and the female ghost

have any unusual encounters?

The house is real.

Help!

We've moved the body here. What's next?

Hide it here first.

We'll deal with it later
when the police are gone.

Will it rot and stench?

Hey, man.

Can you do me a favor?

Can you untie me, please?

Just a moment.

Where are you guys going?

- Where are you guys going?
- Darn it.

How is he still alive?

I have no idea.

Should we hand him over to the police?

Don't bother.

Let's just bury him now.

Wait! Don't kill me!

I have nothing against you!

I can give you some diamonds!

I have ten diamonds!

Ten!

Boss!

Boss.

A place like this

must have a ton of ghosts.

I don't think Chiang would be here.

The images you received

were sent by the female ghost.

She wants to be with you forever.

Junior.

You'll take the lead.

I have faith in you.

How many diamonds did he say he has?

I think he said ten diamonds.

The police are here.

Let's move him back first.

What the heck is Tsung doing?

Monk!

Do you see anything?

Nothing, I got a good look.

There's nothing in here.

Boss, it's nothing. Come on in.

I'll cover for you.

Maybe there's really something urgent.

- Why don't you answer it then?
- Yes, get over here!

Senior.

I'll cover for you.

Hurry up.

Boss.

In my temple,

everyone knows one thing.

Do you know what the evil spirits
are most afraid of?

What's that?

The masculine energy of men.

You're the most masculine among us!

You should take it

and scare the heck out of them.

I don't want my masculine energy
to be covered by my clothes,

so I'm letting it out in the air.

That's a terrible sight.

Cover it up.

My god.

Boss, chant the Diamond Sutra now!

Diamond Sutra!

Diamond Sutra!

Boss.

Boss!

Boss!

Stop!

- I'm going to shoot you with this!
- Stop shooting rubber bands!

Get your hands off me!

It's not working! Boss!

Boss...

Where is everybody?

Hurry, get rid of all your clothes!

Get out of the way!

Boss, why didn't you cover me?

Are you having feelings for him now?

Are you in love with the body?

Why did you move him back here?

Tell me.

Why would the police go there?

What happened to Sheng's nose?

What's the matter?

Is he losing his mind?

Just for one diamond?

Look at all of you.

Don't you find it ridiculous?

There are ten diamonds.

Where?

I don't know.

They're not on him. We've checked.

Hide him.

Where do we hide him?

I have a bold idea.

Here's some corn for you.

They're all free.

Take it with you on the road.

More!

More!

Hold on.

Darn, where did you get that phone?

Attention!

Left on one, right on two.

One, two, one, two.

And go!

- One, two.
- One, two.

What's our motto?

- Be strong!
- Be strong!

- Be fierce.
- Be fierce.

- Be serious.
- Be serious.

- Be righteous.
- Be righteous.

They're not looking at us anymore.
Let's go now.

Let's go.

Let's get him out of here now.

Excuse me, I'm Officer Chen.

The guardrail on the road got wrecked,

so the station sent me to check it out.

There really is an Officer Chen?

There are more people
than what is registered.

Do you have all your IDs on you?

I'll need to run over the names.

Calling for backup!

Do you copy?

Boss, what now?

Let's head back.

Boss.

But we haven't found him and the diamonds.

Do you have any better ideas?

I sure don't.

Darn it. Chiang's finger is here.

These people
definitely have something to hide.

And you're just going to walk away now?

I will get Psycho back.

Or maybe you want to be the boss?

Darn it!

Maybe we can exchange numbers.

We can still hang out together
in the future.

Or maybe I can send you the photos I took.

Are you messing with me?

Darn!

Do you think it's safe
to keep those photos?

Should I beat some sense into you?

Be careful. The screen could scratch you.

Darn!

Turn back!

076.

Please inform your current whereabouts.

God, help me!

Jesus.

Boss.

Boss.

Where are you going?

Gosh.

Why is there popcorn?

It's still warm.

The one who did this must still be around.

Chiang!

Untie him!

Give us a hand. Hurry.

Boss.

Chiang has pooped out

all the diamonds.

They are very important.

Collect them all and keep them safe.

Thank you.

Sorry, Chiang.

Please give your blessings

to me, Psycho, and Boss.

Bless us all to be safe and sound,

especially Psycho.

Make him come back in one piece.

Junior, you get in first.

Chiang.

We're getting in the car now.

It will be all right.

Quick, slay him!

Freeze!

Who are you people?

- Who are you really?
- Start talking!

And who are you people?

Take this!

Put it down!

Let's have a duel!

You, get out!
I promise not to rip you apart.

You crazy woman!

So chilly!

- Where's my gun?
- He just...

I can't believe she's your type.

Get over here!

Hold him down!

Senior!

Let's fight!

Hold him!

Come and get me!

Where is my gun?

- Right here.
- Come on!

Everyone, freeze!

I believe in you.

Junior, fire all you want.

Come on!

I'm bleeding.

I'm bleeding!

- Mr. Feng.
- Don't move!

Stay back!

Stay back!

I'm already bleeding.

Get in the car!

You freaking trash!

Why did I get shot instead of you guys?

Go!

You piece of s♪♪♪.

Darn this.

A bunch of lunatics.

We're running from a fight with farmers.

How embarrassing.

- Let's get back first and talk later.
- I shot someone.

It's fine.
There's a first time for everything.

Senior, are you going to arrest me?

Of course not.

Why are you sitting here?

I've been sitting here all along.

Then who's driving now?

Why are you the one driving?

Diamond Sutra!

Watch the road!

Diamond Sutra!

Don't strip my pants.

The car is going to crash!

Hsu!

Sheng, Tsung,

and Chi Ming.

You all got out?

What brings you to the mountains?

I'm paying our classmates a visit.

Come on in.

Stay for a few more days.

We can catch up.

- What do you say?
- Sure.

You have a cozy place here.

Not at all.

Let me introduce you.

So after all,

you weren't released from prison.

You broke out and escaped!

Once the heat is over, we'll leave, okay?

Just be a pal and do us a solid.

Like heck I'd do it.

Li, come here.

I need to talk to you.

You can't trust a darn word
from any of them.

We'll leave first thing in the morning.

If anyone asks,
just act like nothing has happened.

I never said I'd report you.

What are you so freaking afraid of?

Darn you!

No!

I got you now.

Stop running.

Don't move!

I see.

You were murdered by these people.

That other murder victim

was your dad.

You kept following us...

Who's that woman?

Hoping that we'd help you.

I had no idea

you couldn't speak.

I misunderstood you.

I can still talk.

I'm not trying to spook you.

I'm just trying to help.

What would you like us to do?

You should get going.

Darn it.

It's on fire! Let's go!

The car rolled over.

- Hurry.
- Darn.

Chiang is still in the car!

Chiang!

Chiang!

Chiang!

Go!

It's burning!

Hurry!

- Chiang!
- Stomp on it.

Wait, stop stomping on him!

He's still alive.

Chiang!

Chiang!

It's so hot.

Feng...

You're here...

I'm sorry
that it got out of hand like this.

Hey.

Don't die on me yet.

Chiang!

You're grabbing me too tight. It hurts.

Sorry about that.

Even if I survived,

I'd be disabled anyway.

Can I ask you for a favor?

Feng.

Put me out of my misery, okay?

I beg of you.

If I have to go,

I'd like you to do it.

That bullet for Mr. Lin,

I'll return it in the next life.

What are you talking about?

What next life?

You're still in this life!

Let's get you to the hospital!

Come on! Give me a hand!

Hurry up!

Get down!

Chiang!

Chiang!

Chiang!

Boss, more incoming!

Chiang!

Chiang.

All four shots in the vital spots.

He's a goner.

Boss.

You've sort of given Chiang

what he wished for in the end.

Now we've got such a flame here.

Those guys will find us here in no time.

Boss, should we leave now?

The flame?

I'm the one who's burning inside!

Why should police be afraid
of the outlaws?

I'm not running!

I'll leave the diamonds in your care.

As for my buddy,

help me carry him down the mountains.

Mr. Feng.

Your buddy is my buddy.

Monk!

Where are the diamonds?

That jerk got the diamonds!

Boss.

What now?

We've set the bait.

But those guys aren't fools either.

They won't believe that
only one person has all the diamonds.

I'm trying to separate them.

Once they split up,

we'll stand a chance.

I don't have the diamonds.

It's all the same.

None of you are going to get away.

I'm the Third Prince.

The Third Prince, Nezha

What kind of monster are you?

I'm tired of beating people.

Today, I'm going to beat up a deity.

Grumpy old fool.

Where did he put it?

Darn it!

That's a bold idea.

Buddy.

I'll go and draw their attention.

I might not make it back. Take care.

I'm over here! Come and get me!

Where do you think you're going?

Guan Gong, Guan Yunchang

I got you now!

Darn you...

Monkey King, Sun Wukong

That was awesome!

Do I have more deities to fight?

Great.

Darn.

Let's keep going!

I was thinking to myself.

Should I get the goon or the boss first?

I didn't expect the boss
to slay the goon himself.

Looks like I've got a freebie.

So many people
are going after one diamond.

How are you going to split it?

I was wondering too.

The diamond is so darn hard.

How are we going to split it?

Sir.

I'm just a farmer.

You're more like a butcher.

I got him.

Chiang is here.

Cut him open and get the diamonds.

Don't lay a finger on my buddy!

I have the diamonds.

What did you say?

I knew that was a wig!

Darn it.

Why didn't you hand us the diamonds?

Sheng.

Look what I just found.

Where did you get that?

You could've told me.

I got you now.

Sir.

Don't go any further.

It's really dark and dangerous there.

Come on out!

Come out.

Don't go any further!

- Why would you come to the mountains?
- Darn.

Monk!

Monk, where are you?

Monk!

Darn it.

Monk!

Handsome.

This time,

I'm really going to pull the trigger.

Buddy.

I'm coming with you.

Wait!

My hair!

You filthy monkey.

I'm the God of Love.

God of Love, Chai Tao-huang

What kind of relationship
are you wishing for?

I don't wish for any darn encounter.

I'll count on myself, instead of the gods!

Hey, stop it, young man!

You don't know the way. Stop walking.

Come on!

You've been bleeding a lot.

Monk!

Monk!

Monk!

Monk!

Monk!

Monk!

Where are you?

Monk!

Monk!

Monk!

Where are you?

Monk!

Where are you?

Monk!

Relax.

When I catch a protected species,

I'll let it go.

Sir.

I'm turning myself in.

Do you want to turn yourself in?

I'm pretty happy about it.

But you have a personal vendetta
to deal with first.

Don't go.

Don't leave me here by myself!

Don't go!

Junior.

Are you serious?

By the way,
you can check out this statement I wrote.

How do you spell "accident"?

Can't you talk?

Wait.

What on earth is wrong with you?

Boss.

It's nothing.

You have no idea.

I rocked the temple of heaven.

Good job.

Senior.

What brings you to our small country?

What's the matter? Are you on a mission?

Nothing. I'm just killing some time,
wandering around.

I had no idea I'd run into poop like this.

You solved a cold case
by wandering around.

I have one.

You're going on a hot streak.

Not really.

Senior, can you tell me something?

You said the fugitives hid here

and killed Chou and his daughter, right?

But according to my file,

after Chou Tsai Hsing got out of prison,

he had been living alone.

He was never married

and had no daughter.

The only photo I have here

is the one when he was still in jail.

Look.

That is Chou Tsai Hsing.

The Eighth Skills Training Course
of the Corrections Department

Who is this woman?

This woman...

Let me check.

This woman is Lin Li.

A psychiatrist.

She'd visit the prison
to do counseling every week.

Hold on a second.

It says that after the fugitives got away,

she went missing too.

Now, she's listed as a missing person.

That other murder victim

was your dad.

Also, it's reported
that Lin Li was deeply in debt.

She's listed as an accomplice
who helped the fugitives.

Senior, this case
seems pretty complicated.

Senior.

There's something here
I'd like to show you.

Okay. Later then.

You weren't released from prison.

You broke out and escaped!

This woman is Lin Li.

- We'll leave first thing in the morning.
- A psychiatrist.

Now she's listed as a missing person.

I'm not trying to spook you.

I'm just trying to help.

You can't trust a darn word
from any of them.

She's listed as an accomplice
who helped the fugitives.

Darn.

I really got fooled by a ghost.

Senior.

I don't want to go back.

I want to join you guys.

Or maybe you don't think I'm good enough?

Junior.

For Mr. Lin

It's not that you're not good enough.

You're just not cut out to be one.

Do you get what I'm saying?

Let's go.

Something is wrong.

Darn!

Guard here.

Okay.

Junior. Are you all right?

You bloody turncoat.

Junior.

I'll destroy you!

Why don't you do it?

I'm a police officer.

Let me go.

Shut up.

Psycho!

The bullet for Mr. Lin,
I'll return it in the next life.

That's it?

Is it all done now?

Psycho.

Sorry.

You might not be able
to reattach your finger.

It wasn't icy enough back then.

Don't worry.

My left hand has a better aim.

It's no big deal.

My finger was cut too.

Like it's such a big deal.

Screw you.

Come out and fight!

Sure, why not?
I've killed someone, you know.

All right, knock it off.

You idiots.

Don't act like little brats.

Boss.

Those diamonds...

What are you going to do with them?

Let me see.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Six.

Feng.

How are we going to split it?