Guardians of Oz (2015) Movie Script

[Groans]

[Both laugh]

[Gasps]

[Screaming]

[Screeching]

[Ozzy] Flying monkeys.

So scary and mean,

they've given children nightmares

for generations.

And some grownups.

Flying monkeys scare the winkies.

[Screaming]

Flying monkeys scare the munchkins.

[Screaming]

And they scare me, too.

[Ozzy] This is me.

Oh, sorry.

That's not me.

That's me.

Ozzy! Keep up!

Yes, dad.

I-- I mean, sir.

That is my dad, Goliath.

See the resemblance?

Neither does he.

Ozzy, do you have to wear that?

Yeah, dad.

I keep trying, but I really can't fly.

The word "can't"

is not in the winged monkey vocabulary.

Neither are a lot of words.

Like "excuse me," "thank you,"

or "sorry, I burped."

[Grumbles]

[Goliath] Now, move on.

Eveline is waiting.

[Grunting]

[Eveline cackling]

[Ozzy] This is eveline,

the wicked witch of the west.

[Thunder crashes]

Tonight, all of oz will fear me once more.

[Cackling]

[Ozzy] She was supposed to be dead.

Let me go back,

give you a little background.

Some time ago,

a young warrior came to oz.

-[Shrieks]

-[Gasps]

Her name was Dorothy.

She discovered eveline's weakness.

I--

I'm melting.

Melting!

[Ozzy] After she defeated eveline...

Glinda the good witch

helped Dorothy find her way back home.

Dorothy's friends became the kings of oz.

Then, because glinda's so... good,

she gave eveline a second chance.

I'm unmelting.

I'm unmelting!

[Cackling]

Welcome back, eveline.

My handle is wicked witch of the west,

glindy.

Oh, but you won't be a witch anymore.

No. No!

[Screaming]

[Ozzy] And that's how eveline

lost her magic powers.

They were locked in her broom,

and it was given to the three kings

to guard it.

[Thunder crashes]

And I'm sure it all seemed

like a good idea at the time...

But a wicked witch is a wicked witch,

even without their magic powers.

[Chattering and shouting]

Goliath.

Listen up, you monkeys!

[Growls]

Good. Here's the plan.

The sleepy ribs were delivered,

those fools eat the ribs, get sleepy.

Meanwhile, I'll be outside

wearing a big mustache--

a big mustache?

Yes, your evilness.

Who did this?

Send him to the dungeon!

Okay. No interruptions.

When these fools get sleepy,

Goliath will break through the wall--

[Goliath] Err, eveline?

Uh... don't mean to bother you, but--

[scoffs]

-What?

-I thought you agreed to my plan.

We let someone small

sneak in through the vent,

open the window, let US charge in.

-You know? Uh...

-When did I agree to that?

A week ago.

Uh, I don't remember that.

-Uh...

-Ugh, whatever.

Goliath will do blah, blah, blah,

we break in to the palace,

and get me my broom back.

[Laughing maniacally]

-Got it?

-Yes, my witch!

Good. And remember this:

I will not tolerate failure.

[Both chuckle]

Now, let's go. Let's just go.

You're gonna mess it up.

[Both laughing]

You heard her, everyone out!

Do I have to do this?

Winged monkeys

have served wicked witches for centuries.

That's the point,

she's so cruel and mean--

I am a winged monkey,

you're a winged monkey, so, act like one.

[Groans]

[Growls]

Mm-hm.

That's more like it.

Hmm. Get on my back, it'll be faster.

I can't think of a better present

than this.

You said somebody brought it?

Oh, yes.

There was this funny-looking guy

at the door.

So, get ready, kings,

as we are going to eat like...

Well... kings. [Chuckles]

Remember, tonight is your chance

to show all the winged monkeys

you are a worthy warrior.

Don't disappoint me.

I will.

I mean... I will show all.

Not that I will disappoint you. [Chuckles]

[Yawns]

Manners, lion.

What?

[Yawns]

Excuse me.

[Yawns]

Me, too.

I-- I don't know why I'm so tired.

-[Laughing]

-Shh!

[Dishes clattering]

[Grunting]

Oh. Hi-- aah!

Ooh!

[Yells]

[Lion grumbles]

Sound the alarm!

[Goliath groans]

Well, attack anyway!

[Alarm blaring]

[Lion growls]

What are you doing?

It worked with crows.

[Monkey growls and scarecrow whimpers]

Get it.

[All gasp]

[Grunts]

Dad!

[Laughs]

[Scarecrow yelling]

[Chuckles]

[Scarecrow yells]

[Chuckles]

[Eveline cackling]

I hope you three enjoyed being kings...

Because it's my turn to rule again.

[Cackles]

[Grunting]

You wanted bravery?

Your desire to fight

will be your undoing...

As bravery turns to rage.

Angry at the world,

it traps you in a cage.

You wanted to be brainy

and feel like you were smart...

Now the thoughts you thought you'd want

will keep you apart.

You said that you didn't have a heart

and that you couldn't feel...

Well, by tomorrow

you will feel all sadness,

all pain and all sorrow.

I still got it.

I still got it! Whoo!

[Whimpering]

You nearly ruined everything.

Look around.

Look how many monkeys were wasted

because of this battle.

I'm actually not that bad.

Yeah, i--

I just need to get a better helmet is all.

Silence!

[Both shriek, then grunt]

I have my broom back, no thanks to you.

Where is my chief of security?

Uh, here, your evilness.

Send this one to the dungeon.

I do not tolerate failure.

Did I say that one already?

Like one, two, three...

That time in the toilet...

Fourteen times already, my witch.

[Goliath] Dungeon?

Eveline...

Uh, ozzy, that's my boy's name,

I can't send him to the dungeon.

-[All gasp]

-[Eveline scoffs]

-Dungeon!

[All chanting] Dungeon! Dungeon! Dungeon!

Dungeon! Dungeon! Dungeon!

[Goliath] No!

It was my idea!

He wasn't ready.

He just got a little... chicken.

No! Dad!

That's not what happened.

A chicken, eh?

How sad for you.

Especially since you were the one

I trusted, Goliath.

I'm sorry, eveline.

You have failed.

Yes, my witch.

It will never happen again.

I know.

[Eveline cackles and Goliath grunts]

[Clucking]

[All gasp, then laugh]

-I'm sorry, dad.

-[Clucks]

Derp, take them away.

Derp.

[Clucking]

[Shrieks]

[All gasp]

[Clucks]

Dad!

What are you doing?

I don't know.

My broom.

[Monkeys growling]

Give me that.

If I give it back...

Would you turn my dad back to normal?

-No!

-No?

I can't...

Because my magic

is still inside the broom.

-Give it back to me, you little--

-but you're gonna blast me.

Right.

Here... let me show you.

[Whimpering]

[Growling]

[Yelling]

My broom!

[Monkeys laughing]

Hey! How many times

do I have to say "get him"

for you guys to get him?

[Glass shatters]

Oh, he's gone.

[Goliath clucks and eveline grumbles]

Throw them in the dungeon!

Wait, me?

Are you kidding?

Oh, no, wait, come on! Please.

The rest of you, go!

Everyone...

Find him.

That broom is mine.

That magic is mine.

I must have it back!

[Yelling]

[Ozzy] Hey, hey!

Hey! Hey!

Hey, hey, hey. Ow! Whoa!

Ah.

[Whimpering and yelling]

Help!

No. No.

No!

Stop! Stop!

Stop!

[Yells]

[Grunts]

[Groaning]

[Yawns]

-[Frog] Get off of me!

-[Gasps]

I don't believe this.

This was the worst night of my life.

-Watch it.

-Sorry, i--

the disrespect that big people have

for small slimy things.

Don't you look at me like that.

-What?

-Don't you look at me like that.

Honestly, people are so rude.

Rude! If somebody looked at you

like you're looking at me--

I don't have time to talk, okay?

The wicked witch is after me.

This is you, right?

"Complain, complain, complain.

Me, me, me."

-I'm sorry, dad.

-You want problems?

The pond I live in tastes like mud.

Well, that's a problem.

I tried to get glinda to do something,

but no avail.

Glinda? Where is she?

I can't believe you don't know.

Everybody knows. Ribbit.

I don't. I'm a flying monkey, okay?

Oh, it's far.

Yep, it's pretty far.

Like 4000 hops far.

-Which way?

-That way.

That's it?

-It's far if you're a frog.

-Thank you.

Yeah, whatever.

People would respect me

if I were a prince.

Glinda.

Glinda, I know you don't normally help

winged monkeys...

But you've gotta help me.

It's eveline,

she got ahold of her magic broom

and turned my dad into a chicken.

But I got it from her

and ran away with it.

-[Gabby] Don't touch her!

-[Yells]

Who are you?

What are you doing here?

Flying monkeys are not welcome here.

I'm ozzy. I need help from glinda.

She, um-- she didn't hear you.

Glinda is sleeping right now.

Come back, um, never.

Go away.

That doesn't look like sleeping.

Yeah, it's sleeping.

I have seen people sleeping and she isn't.

Yes, she is sleeping.

Some people sleep in their bed,

wearing pajamas, holding their Teddy bear.

She likes to sleep sitting, dressed up,

eyes opened, and a cup of tea.

-You're lying.

-Go away.

Get down.

No, I need glinda's help.

She won't help you.

Glinda, you've gotta help me.

-She can't.

-Why?

Oh.

Why?

[Sighs]

Okay.

See... what happened was...

I was working on my potions.

I was really busy and trying to keep

everything straight in my head, you know?

It's a lot to learn.

But meanwhile,

my aunt glinda's all like:

[Glinda] Oh, Gabby,

please make me a cup of tea.

[Gabby] But I was all like:

I'm busy.

And she was all like:

Now please.

[Gabby] And so I was all:

Okay, now.

[Gasps]

Ah.

[Gagging]

What did you put in this?

You don't like it?

Glinda?

Oops.

Unfortunately, whatever I made,

it wasn't tea.

But-- but I mean, she's just--

she's not, like, dead or anything.

She's just... on pause.

[Chuckles] She'll be fine.

You seem so confident.

I'm going to make an antidote.

[Yicky] You better stop croaking

and start talking.

Have you seen a small stupid monkey?

Oh, yeah, very stupid.

Where?

Hmm?

[Yelling]

-A-ha.

-Hmm.

No reading.

Okay. All right. Um...

[Grumbles]

Go away.

Gross. Put that down.

You have to let me help. You need it.

I don't. Everything is perfect.

Perfectly perfect.

Okay?

I need glinda's help.

How long will this take?

Shh. Okay, okay, okay.

Hmm. Rattlesnake rattle, invisible thread,

vibes from a backwards rock song...

Cotton candy flavoring.

Okay, uh, pass me that red bottle there.

"Juice of mangosteen"?

What's that do?

Ah. It tastes good.

What are you looking for?

Tell me if you find splinter of frogwood.

Oh, don't tell me we're out.

[Grumbles]

It's a magical thing.

It goes in, like, everything.

Everything?

This isn't happening.

Can't you get some more?

Uh, frogwood trees are extremely scarce

and difficult to find.

Glinda is going to have to stay like that

until I find one.

What?

How long will that be?

I do not know that answer exactly.

Really? Aw.

There's no hope.

What am I gonna do?

What's the problem?

Eveline.

I ran away with the broom

that holds her magic power.

You did?

Impressive.

If a bit criminal.

She is going to kill me.

And my father is a chicken.

Somebody's got to do something.

Somebody's got to find a frogwood tree,

and it's obviously not going to be you.

Obviously.

You're a tiny little monkey

with strangely small wings.

I am.

You're not strong, smart or brave, or--

how do you know?

Am I wrong?

I-- I, uh...

The kings.

They're brave, smart and goodhearted.

They could help me.

How do I find them?

I don't know.

You're not brave, not smart, not--

heard you the first time.

But... you do have the broom.

I need to find those guys.

They'll help me.

You're just going to go out

and find the kings?

Well... yes.

And how are you going to find them?

I have no idea.

So, you're just walking this way

hoping to find one of them?

I can't wait for you to undo

your magic tea trick on glinda, can I?

[Sighs]

Okay.

I'm going to go find

some frogwood splinters,

bring them back, finish my potion,

and then she can take care of eveline.

I don't have that much time.

Eveline is looking for me.

Can you fly that thing?

I did once, but I don't know how.

Hmm. Wait right here.

Hmm?

[Gasps]

Don't worry, auntie,

I'll bring back your

never-to-be-touched-by-Gabby crystal ball

safe and sound, okay?

I'll take that as a yes.

And, um... next time,

try not to give wicked witches

a second chance.

Just saying.

Okay, bye.

Look what I got.

Hey!

I told you to wait for me.

You look strange.

[Sniffs]

And, ew, you stink.

Huh?

Sorry, I thought you were somebody else.

-Uh, I have to go.

-Hey. Where do you think you're going?

-Yeah.

-We're looking for a monkey.

A flying monkey.

Except one that doesn't fly...

Because he's got wings like a bird.

But not like a hawk or an eagle.

More like a Robin or a little Finch.

[Both laugh]

Sorry, freaks,

I don't know what you're talking about.

Haven't seen him.

Maybe this will remind you.

[Chuckles]

Oh. So, this winged monkey is pink?

Pink?

Have you seen him or not?

Nope. Sorry.

Okay, have you seen this? [Chuckles]

It's supposed to be a broom.

Have you seen a broom?

Nope. No brooms here.

A-ha. What's that there, then?

Oh, this? It's a broom,

but it doesn't look anything

like the one in your picture.

I'm, um... i'm... i'm-- i'm...

I'm a maid

and I'm just going to my sweeping job.

I'll let you know if it turns up.

Hmm. Really?

Mm-hm.

Okay.

That was close. Thanks.

I'm coming with you.

You're coming with me?

-Why?

-You've gotta find the kings,

I've gotta wake up glinda.

Two heads are better than one.

Which heads?

Ugh. Never mind.

Look, I brought glinda's crystal ball.

-It'll show the way.

-It will?

-How?

-Magic.

Check it out.

[Takes deep breath, then exhales]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Speaking magic words]

That way?

You sure?

Okay.

We go... that way.

Well, how could that be wrong?

[Chattering]

Whose bright idea was this?

I give you one guess.

[Cackles]

Closer.

Come on, come on. Keep it coming.

Lower. Left, yes.

Lower. Lower...

-Lower...

-[Grumbles]

Lower...

-[Grumbles] Put it down!

-Lower...

[Eveline cackling]

[Grunts]

[Gasps] No.

[Gibbering]

[Squeaking]

[Gabby sighs]

[Roars]

[Screaming]

[Whimpers]

[Squeaks, then growls]

[Yells]

[Gabby] I've just never known

a winged monkey that was smart.

Or nice.

I mean,

I've never really known one actually.

I mean, no one. But, well,

you know what I'm talking about, right?

[Screaming nearby]

Listen.

That guy is crazy.

[Both screaming and whimpering]

He is mad!

[Growling nearby]

[Whimpers]

It's really him.

It's lion.

-[Tree 1] Come on.

-[Tree 2] Get him.

[Tree 3] Hold him, hold him.

-[Tree 4] Hey...

-What? What?

[Trees shouting indistinctly]

[Tree yelling]

[Lion growling]

[Tree 5] Come on, take him down.

Go. Go, go.

Go get him.

[Grunting]

[Yells]

[Thuds, then all gasp]

Run!

I'm serious.

Get out of here.

He'll kill you.

What's wrong with him?

Why is he fighting?

He's mad.

It's like he is filled with anger

at everyone and everything.

He's been like this since he got here.

We're not going to get him back

to the emerald city if he's like that.

Oh. You're here to take him away?

Lion! Your ride's here!

No! Wait. Wait, wait.

Over here!

[Growling]

[Branches cracking]

[Trees whimpering]

Where are you going?

Are you afraid of me...

Coward?

[Growling]

Uh, this ain't gonna work.

We better look for tin woodman first.

[Speaking magic words]

Get up, lion.

I'm not through with you.

[Grunting]

He's gotta get out of there.

Yes.

Winkie town.

[Grunts]

[Groans]

Hey, move on. I know where tin is.

[Grunting and growling continues]

[Gabby panting]

[Yells]

Lion needs help.

What? We need help, not him.

That tree is going to kill him.

[Grunting]

Hey, lion!

You're nothing more than a...

A pussycat!

-What are you doing?

-I don't know.

You're going to get US killed.

I need to get him out of the fight.

Lion, catch me if you can!

[Groans]

Hey, lion!

[Both] Huh?

You're a chicken!

No offense to your dad.

[Growling]

Uh, we got his attention. Now what?

I though you said you didn't know

how to fly this thing.

I don't.

I just got so scared, it took off.

[Roars]

[Both] Whoa!

[Laughs] You did it.

[Ozzy chuckles]

-[Yells]

-Watch out!

Look at you.

You're really flying this thing.

No!

-My crystal ball!

-Ow!

[Laughs]

You think you can catch US?

What are you doing?

[Ozzy] As long as he thinks he can get US,

he's going to follow US.

Hmm. I can't decide if that's

really clever or really stupid.

Me neither. We better get tin.

Um, which way?

Any news of my broom?

Your evilness...

Oh, come on.

The emerald city council

needs your signatures on these papers.

Oh, honestly,

who knew running the emerald city

would be so much work?

After you sign these, uh...

You have a meeting with a representative

of the lollipop guild...

Plus a photo op with Jack pumpkinhead.

[Eveline grunting]

Oh, come on!

I finally rule oz,

and I can't find one pen that works?

[Sighs] Has anyone found my broom

or the monkey?

Half of your army is looking for them.

Good.

I want my broom and that monkey back.

He has to be punished.

Punished.

By the way, the emerald senate

is asking for the length of your mandate

and if you're calling for elections

after it.

What?

If I had my broom

those fools wouldn't dare to question me.

I'm the queen of oz!

So...

-What do I tell them?

-Don't tell them anything.

I want my best men looking for the broom.

My very best men.

Derp.

[Humming]

[Growls]

Derp.

Uh-uh.

Lion! Catch me if you can!

There it is, winkie town.

Let's go.

[Growling]

[Sniffs]

[Man snoring]

Excuse me, sir.

We're looking for--

[yells]

Attack!

Flying monkey attack!

Attack!

Flying monkey attack!

[Townspeople clamoring]

Attack!

[Laughing]

[Dog barking]

Hey. Go away.

[Giggles] Come on, it's just a doggy.

Come here, doggy.

I won't hurt you.

[Growls]

[Sniffs]

Alarm!

Let me handle this.

Are you a messenger from the wicked witch?

Take US to the tin woodman now.

Uh, either you bring word

from the wicked witch

and we throw you in prison...

Or-- or you-- you're here to attack US,

and we throw you in prison.

Hey!

You can hurt somebody with that.

[Screams]

Sir?

Could you please take US to tin woodman?

We need to talk to him.

Hmm? [Grumbles]

Mm-hm.

I don't think that tin woodman

will talk to you.

Why?

Follow me.

[Crying]

He's been like this since we found him

and brought him back to town.

Mr. Tin woodman?

So much pain!

Floods, tornadoes.

Everywhere!

Earthquakes, stubbed toes.

I can't stop it!

[Continues crying]

But, Mr. Woodman,

nobody can save the whole world.

Uh-oh. You shouldn't have said that.

There is no hope.

This guy is pathetic.

Yes, I am.

You're wrong.

There is always hope.

You can't just sit there and cry.

You're a king.

I am?

-Mm-hm.

-[Guard] Attack!

Flying monkey attack!

It was a trap.

No. No, it wasn't.

[Screaming]

[Monkey chuckles]

Hello.

Hope you don't mind

if we brought a... friend.

[Derp] Derp.

Wait, he's your friend?

I thought I was your friend?

No, I mean like:

"We brought along a friend,"

like it's scary. Come on.

-Oh.

-Derp.

[Lion growling]

Derp.

Uh-oh.

[Growling]

[Screaming]

Derp.

Please, Mr. Woodman... we have to go.

Where could we go?

Let's report to eveline what's happening.

Huh?

Please, lion is coming.

Lion?

Lion!

[Gabby & ozzy] Duck!

[Growls]

Lion, no!

[Electrical buzzing]

Look.

Oh, my head.

Where am I?

You are in winkie town, sir.

You.

Why did you do it?

What? Do what?

Why did you help eveline steal the broom?

I had to.

My dad said I had to.

Eveline said I had to.

If I said to you to jump off the bridge,

would you?

Yes.

I mean, no.

But you don't know what it's like

to be a winged monkey.

They do whatever eveline says.

All of them.

Hey, he saved your life.

You were about to get killed by that tree.

I was just so... angry.

You were under a curse.

I'm better now.

[Ozzy] Please, Mr. Lion...

I need your help,

along with the other kings.

Someone has to stop eveline

and help my father.

Oh, he is a chicken.

I mean, his father is a chicken.

Thanks for saving me.

You're a brave little monkey.

The people of this city

have to accept the authority

and legitimacy of my administration.

[Door opens]

Hey!

Eveline! We have news!

No interviews.

I currently have my best men

looking for my broom.

Your best men?

I thought you sent US.

I thought you sent my best men.

All your men are sort of the same.

[Sighs] Okay. Report.

The broom-stealing monkey

is gathering the kings of oz.

-What?

-He said that the broom-stealing monkey--

I heard you already.

If that monkey is using my magic

to bring the kings...

Then I am going to need some help

of my own.

The tinsmiths say they'll have tin woodman

repaired in two weeks.

Uh, he doesn't have that kind of time.

I don't have that kind of time.

Glinda doesn't have that kind of time.

Hmm. I know one guy who's smart enough

to put him back together in a quick.

Scarecrow.

-Which way, Gabby?

-How would I know?

Glinda's ball crashed in the forest.

Maybe you could use something else.

[Speaking magic words]

We go...

That way.

All right, kids, let's go.

Uh, anybody need to go

to the bathroom first?

-Uh, mm-mm.

-Mm-mm.

We've got a long trip ahead of US.

I should really go to the bathroom, too.

[Clucks]

[Gibbering and babbling]

[Clucking]

[Screeching]

Could we stop for a while?

[Groans]

[Gasps] Look, I see something.

Hello?

Shh. It's a library.

It's the archive of oz.

It's where they put everything

when it gets really, really old.

[Murmuring]

That's him. He's here.

Where?

Which way do we go?

It's like a maze.

[Lion] The labyrinth of knowledge.

Let's stick together.

Heh. Or not.

[Snoring]

[Grumbles]

[Gasps]

[Grunting]

[Grumbles]

Wingo.

Wake up, my lovely.

[Sniffs]

Ooh.

My, my. Somebody needs their cage

cleaned up, don't they?

You! Clean this room.

Me?

[Sobbing]

No. No.

-Hey. Ah?

-Hmm?

[Gak shrieks]

[Whimpers]

Wingo.

Mommy's got a little surprise for you.

[Wingo growls, then eveline gasps]

[Wingo snarling]

[Roars]

[Gasps]

[Both whimpering]

[Roars]

[Eveline chuckles]

Mommy's got to go back to her office

to make a call,

but your little friends here

are taking you out to play.

[Whimpering]

Take him and find that monkey.

[Wingo roaring]

[Gasps] I see him.

I don't see him.

[Grunting]

[Gasps, then whimpers]

Hmm. There might be

a solution in this book.

[Lion] I found him.

He's over here!

The distance, g,

where the set f has true/false value...

-Scarecrow.

-...In musical terms,

transposed to algebraic terms...

One must first determine

not only the syntax, lexicon,

cultural bias of the equation...

Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Hmm.

-But if we reduce the degree...

-Scarecrow.

-Buddy, look at me.

-...By x over the cosine of y.

Compensating for the degradation

over z time...

[Groans] How did you break my curse?

I don't know. I just hit you in the head.

...an increase in the atomic weight...

Lion.

What?

The mind must be constantly challenged.

Constantly challenged, I'm telling you,

or it withers and shrivels and wrinkles

and puckers up and--

-then where are you?

-Stop talking

-for one second.

-Wait!

He might be useful like this.

-...everyone else solved the problems.

-Professor scarecrow!

We bring you a great challenge,

a puzzle nobody has ever solved.

-Puzzle?

-Yes.

The greatest minds in all of oz

have been unable

to put this puzzle together again.

[Gasps]

I present unto you...

The puzzle of a thousand parts.

Poppydooddles.

Every riddle has its solution.

And every solution has its riddle

that leads directly to it.

[Squeaks]

Oh, yeah?

Then prove it.

-[Squeaking]

-[Chuckles] Huh?

He's finished.

Great.

He looks...

Asleep.

The mechanical shell

has been reassembled,

ah, but we must consider the fluids.

Hmm. Two parts oil of acorn nut,

oil of mushroom...

You're making a potion?

He's making a potion.

What do you have in here?

Do you have frogwood?

I need some.

Fantastic!

I'm back to life!

Welcome back, you bucket of bolts, you.

I'm back to life.

[Crying]

Yes, of course. The deeper issue,

of course, is the chemical properties

of each element.

-And the degree of...

-Oh, come on.

-Hit him.

-Hit him?

Just like that?

If you don't, I will.

It's not working.

Stop it, you guys.

There's got to be a way.

Think. What else did you do?

I don't know.

I can't remember, I was scared.

[Wingo roaring nearby]

Uh-oh.

What is that?

You try to cure them.

-I'll take care of the beast.

-You will?

I'm king of the beasts.

[Roaring]

[Groans]

[Roars]

[Gulps]

[Scarecrow] The square root of--

times three...

-Hit him again.

-What?

Are you scared?

No.

Hurry up.

Just do what I say.

-But--

-do it!

[Yells]

[Electrical buzzing]

What? Who? Where?

It worked!

-How?

-Eveline runs on fear.

Her broom has only worked

when you're scared.

Tin?

Scarecrow?

[Lion growls]

-Lion?

[Grunts]

-What's happening?

-The broom.

No, wait. You don't understand.

I need your help.

-[Monkeys laugh]

-Flying monkeys!

[Tin woodman yells]

-Ozzy!

-[Wails]

Beaten by the power of knowledge.

[Ozzy yelling, gak laughing]

[Gak] You're in trouble.

-[Ozzy] Look out!

-I'm not that stupid--

[yells]

-[Tin woodman] We have to stop that beast.

-We'll have to use our minds

instead of our strength.

-What are you making?

-Anything.

Hey, here! This is what you want!

[Roars]

[Whimpers]

Mice tails, hurricane eye,

frogwood, dragon breath...

Frogwood?

Wait.

-Is nothing left?

-What?

Frogwood.

You need frogwood?

That kid has plenty of it.

-Ozzy?

-Yes.

-Eveline's broom is made of frogwood.

-What?

I made something.

What does it do?

I don't know.

[Roars]

[Gabby] Stop right there, beast!

[Gasps]

We need more potions.

But it didn't work.

I have a plan.

Get more potions.

Ozzy!

[Roaring]

[All laughing]

[Rumbling]

[Gasping]

[All yelling]

Here's what we'll do.

You get ozzy, I'll get the broom.

Uh-huh.

[Whimpering]

I got him.

Let's go.

Ozzy!

Gabby!

Do you have an appointment?

-Yes.

-No.

If you don't, then get in line.

This is important.

It's about the broom.

Oh. And the monkey.

[Mumbling indistinctly]

[Crowd clamoring]

[Yicky laughs]

Eveline!

[Yells]

Did you bring my broom?

No, not exactly.

Where is wingo?

He isn't coming back.

But we captured the monkey.

[Gabby] Okay!

That does it.

That's not respectful

is what that is, and--

this is not the monkey!

I can't believe monkeys are so stupid.

I should start using winged dogs.

Ozzy isn't stupid.

He reunited the kings.

And when they get here,

everything will be over for you.

Take her to the dungeon.

And the stupid monkey, too.

Take them away!

Don't touch me.

I don't like being treated

like I'm just some kind of flying monkey.

Gather all my army.

I'll have to fix this on my own.

[Grunts]

-[Ozzy] Gabby?

-Ah?

Where's Gabby? Gabby?

Monkeys. [Sniffs] Gabby...

They went that way.

-Yessiree. He can smell all that.

-Weird.

To the emerald city!

Wait.

Um, anyone want to go to the bathroom?

Uh...

-[Ozzy] Mm-mm.

-It's a long trip.

You know what?

I'm going. Better safe than sorry.

[Monkeys laughing and chattering]

[Gasps]

Seriously? You're leaving me here?

[Goliath clucking]

[Tin woodman chuckles]

[Eveline] Buttons, levers...

Ugh! Honestly, how do you make this work?

The problem is

I'm just not techie enough.

[Electricity crackling]

[All gasp]

[Whimpering]

[Eveline] Is this on?

Hello?

Okay, I got that part working.

Attention, oz.

One of my loyal idiot monkeys

has stolen my broom,

and I want it back.

Ozzy?

Listen up now, dear.

I'll speak slowly...

Because I know you monkeys

aren't the brightest.

If you do not return my broom to me

in one hour...

I will have a lovely chicken soup.

Do you understand me?

Bring me my broom!

Meet me on top of the tower!

Don't worry, we won't let anything

happen to your father.

Maybe if I give her the broom...

Now, logically speaking, you see,

if eveline gets her broom back...

She'll have her magic back, but--

and it won't matter

if we've rescued your dad, you see?

She'll just use magic again.

We have to go face her.

Listen, she expects ozzy in one hour.

We'll take her by surprise.

You can't see the witch.

Nobody gets to see the--

um, hello-- hello?

[Ozzy] Down here.

Who are you?

I'm a winged monkey.

One of the witches' loyal staff.

I live only to do

whatever stupid thing she says--

I mean-- i--

I know what you mean. [Chuckles]

Well, why don't you just fly

like everybody else, hmm?

I-- well-- i-- because i--

you can fly with those puny little wings,

can't you? [Laughing]

This is no laughing matter.

Don't laugh.

Quit your laughing, Mr. Door guy.

Don't you know who I am?

-I am somebody you don't know.

-What?

-Shoo! Shoo!

Get away!

Shoo! Shoo! Get away! Shoo! Shoo!

[Both grumble]

-Huh?

-[Growls]

[Groans]

[Meows]

-Uh-oh.

-Open the door.

Uh, yeah-- yes, sir.

[Sighs]

Look, ozzy, it's time you forget

you're the littlest anything.

It doesn't matter. Do you understand?

Easy for you to say,

you're a big powerful lion.

I wasn't always.

Once I was very cowardly.

-Everything scared me.

-Everything?

Everything.

He wouldn't ever roar. He moaned.

He was afraid of his own tail.

Of his own fleas.

-Of his own--

-okay, okay! He gets it!

I can't do this.

I'm weak, I'm scared.

You have been brave enough.

We'll fight for you.

We'll outsmart eveline.

And bring your father back.

-Thanks.

-Stay here.

Keep an eye on that broom.

I will, trust me.

Is the trap ready?

Yes, your evilness.

Is my army in position?

Yes, waiting for your orders.

Are my lashes long enough?

[Moans]

Yes. I guess.

Perfect!

Bring the prisoners.

-Meh! [Growls]

-[Goliath clucks]

[Lion] Release them!

You arrived earlier than I expected.

Where is the monkey?

He's not going to face you. Hmmph.

Come on, eveline, he's just a kid.

Release the chicken and the girl.

How dare you give orders to me?

[Scoffs]

[All] Hmm?

Get them!

[Monkeys gibbering]

[Lion growls]

[Yells]

[Grunting]

[Tin woodman screaming]

[Cackling]

I told you... no one can beat my army.

-[Ozzy] Eveline!

-[Goliath clucks and lion gasps]

[All gasp]

Ozzy!

[Eveline] Well, well, well.

Somebody has been a bad little monkey.

Give me the broom.

You are a coward, little monkey.

[Clucks]

-[Ozzy] Dad.

-The broom.

I can turn him back into a monkey,

but you have to give me the broom.

[Laughs]

I'm not going to do what you say.

And neither should any of you.

[Stammers] Get him, derp.

Oh! Can somebody please stop this--? Ah!

[Ozzy] Monkeys...

The only reason

eveline has any power at all

is because you do what she says.

[Chattering]

Arrest that monkey.

You're all so afraid of her,

but pour water on her, and what is she?

Yeah. That is true, you know.

She doesn't even have her magic power.

I have it right here.

Let go of the broom.

Your dad's a chicken.

I'll make soup out of him.

Without your broom you can't do anything.

Give it.

Give it here, boy.

[Grunts]

[Groans]

Dad, I'm awfully sorry about this.

[Gasps] No!

It's over.

No. No!

No!

He broke the broom?

[Eveline sobbing, Goliath clucks]

That had her magic in it.

She won't get her magic back?

He broke the broom.

I really can't believe it,

but he really broke that broom.

[Monkey 1] Yeah! Ho-ho-ho!

[Growls]

Don't just stand there applauding,

get him!

[Monkey 2] No.

[All laughing]

[Whines] Who said "no"?

Did somebody say "no"?

No.

No!

Yes!

I mean... no.

-[Monkeys] No!

-[Whimpering]

You are nothing more than sheep.

[Bleating]

[Cackles]

[Grumbles]

[Eveline shrieking]

Whoa!

Give it to me.

[Eveline yells]

[Eveline cackles]

[Laughs]

[Grunting]

[Yells, then grunts]

[Grunting]

No! Not again!

I'm remelting!

[Grunting]

[Gasps]

I did it.

[Monkeys cheering]

Ugh. Looks like I need

to find another job.

[Murmuring]

[Crowd chattering and Gabby panting]

-Ozzy!

-Gabby!

Ozzy, you did it.

Gabby, I seriously couldn't have done this

without you.

[Chuckles] I do know that.

[Goliath clucks]

Dad!

Aw.

[Clucking]

Oh, dad.

[All sigh]

Don't worry, glinda will help.

But we didn't find the frogwood.

We've had the frogwood the whole time.

-We have?

-Eveline's broom, it's made of frogwood.

-Ah.

-[Clucks]

[Clucks]

[Glinda giggles]

[Clucking]

[Clears throat] Hey. Hey. Uh.

Hey, I'm back

[Ozzy] Life will go on here in oz.

Glinda got rid of eveline's tower

hanging over the emerald city.

[Cheering]

Lion, tin and scarecrow

went back to emerald city.

And Gabby, well...

She keeps improving every time.

[Clucking]

Oops.

[Ozzy] Best of all, winged monkeys

are now free.

[Chattering and laughing]

Don't be afraid,

flap your wings as fast as you can.

[Goliath gasps, then laughs]

[Both laughing]

[Ozzy] With a little heart,

courage and brains...

You can make your world

a little more... nice.

Guardians of Oz (2015) - full transcript