Gidget's Summer Reunion (1985) - full transcript

Former beach bunny/girl surfer Francine "Gidget" Lawrence is an adult and married to her long-term beau Jeff "Moondoggie" Griffin. She deals with a variety of marital spats, as well as running her own travel agency, running interferences with her teenage niece, and trying to arrange a reunion of her husband's old surfing friends. Meanwhile, Jeff works as an architect and must fend off romantic advances from his beautiful and lascivious boss. Gidget's niece wants to learn how to surf and gets too much when she sneaks out to see a suave, self-serving beach bum behind the back of her nerdy boyfriend.

MAN [ON RADIO]: Wake up, L.A. It's a good-looking Sunday mornin'.

It's gonna be sunny and 85 today, and surf's up.

Simon Terrain coming at you today and all summer long.

["EVERYBODY'S DOWN AT THE BEACH"]

♪ All the guys are surfin' now that summer's here ♪

♪ They know they're getting two girls each ♪

♪ And with the sun in their hair ♪

♪ And their toes in the sand ♪

♪ Everybody's down at the beach ♪

♪ The boards are getting their waxing ♪

♪ The water's 80 degrees ♪



♪ And with the radio blasting ♪

♪ We'll all be down at the beach ♪

[CHEERING]

♪ Summertime is here We'll be having a ball ♪

♪ Surfin' every day of the week ♪

♪ The guys are shooting the curls and showing off for the girls ♪

♪ 'Cause everybody's down at the beach ♪

♪ Load up your surf boards, start your car and drive ♪

♪ There's lots of fun for every girl and guy ♪

GIDGET: Hi. My name's Gidget,

and I love Southern California,

especially the beach.

In some ways, I'm the original little surfer girl.

I... Oh, that's not me.



Now, God was a little bit more conservative with me.

He was saving my body for something more important,

like boyhood maybe.

Well, you won't find me at the beach today, or any day lately.

Not since I started my travel agency about a year ago.

Why?

I'm an overachiever, obsessive-compulsive, and I'm short.

But here's the real reason.

Just one look and you know

there is no way we can afford this house.

But you know me,

I'm always in over my head,

even with heels on.

MAN: One hamburger, one hot dog.

GIRL: Great. MAN: Hot dog. Well done.

GIDGET: Here he is. The man I love.

My husband, my Moondoggie.

How about you guys? Russ, Johnny, what'll you have?

Hot dog, lots of relish.

Sukiyaki. No relish.

JEFF: Larue? Make me a hot dog, will ya, huh?

GIDGET: I picked out everything Jeff's wearing,

except that gold watch.

Anne gave him that.

Anne is his boss.

Anne is rich,

Anne is gorgeous,

Anne is single.

Why go on? It's too beautiful a day.

That distinguished older gentlemen is my dad.

And until Jeff came along, he was the best thing that ever happened to me.

[CHUCKLES] Oh, and that cute little man with him is Johnny Soon,

my number one tour guide,

and amateur firefighter.

There's my best girlfriend on Earth,

Larue.

Without drinking she says what everybody else thinks.

Pretty scary. [CHUCKLES]

Albert, honey,

you are something less than a natural at this game.

Give me a try, okay?

GIDGET: That beautiful young lady

is my 15-and-a-half year old niece, Kim.

She's going to stay with us for the summer.

She's from Bakersfield.

She's never been surfing.

I don't know which is worse.

[ALBERT GASPS]

[SPEAKING LATIN]

GIDGET: That's Latin,

and that's Albert Winslow who works for me.

He's an 18-year-old language genius,

and he's going to help take care of Kim this summer.

I wonder what the Latin word is for "klutz".

And that's me.

Why am I smiling?

Well, at 27 it's fun to be told I can't see certain movies

unless accompanied by an adult.

Hey, I'm thirsty, too.

Do I know you?

Jeff, this is Francine Griffin.

Otherwise, known as Gidget, your wife.

Underneath this tiny exterior

lies a tremendous lack of stature.

Larue. [CHUCKLES]

What's your pleasure?

You.

Oh, my dear! Young lady,

this is a very respectable bar...

Oh, please. Why don't you just shut up

and kiss this woman on the mouth?

I am shocked!

Shocked that you could expect me

to kiss this woman right...

Mmm.

There go the drinks.

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Do you realize this is the first time we've kissed each other?

I mean, really kissed each other in almost a week.

Lousy schedules is what it is.

I'm gone at dawn and you're not getting home till late.

Who would have thought one little travel agency would keep me so busy?

Gidget, it's not just the travel agency. I...

[PAGER BEEPING]

Oh. It's my beeper.

Sweetheart, I'm sorry.

I'll be right back. Okay?

Dad, don't eat too much relish.

You can't eat too much relish.

You can.

Where's Aunt Gidget going?

Probably another reservation for our Hawaiian trip.

I think they must have heard that I am the tour guide.

Well, now that she is a travel agency tycoon, she has her own phone service.

Phone rings night and day. Doesn't it, Jeff?

Yeah, and in between.

Except, she's no tycoon. Neither am I.

Having fun, Kim?

[GIGGLES] It's really great here, Uncle Jeff.

When do I get to go surfing?

Well, I'll tell you what.

Now, tomorrow morning, I'll call the lifeguard station.

If they say the beach is still there, you and Albert can go.

KIM: All right.

Do you mind, Albert?

Oh, no. It'll be my pleasure.

I've often thought of going to the beach.

How long have you lived here?

How about, uh, what, 14 months?

Are you serious? I've been here two days and I can't wait.

Where do you get all the patience?

Zen, mostly.

Zen? What's that?

ALBERT: Well, Zen is the art of self-realization through meditation.

So...

Are you going to tell your wife's best friend or what?

Hmm?

Oh, okay. Fine.

It's none of my business. I'll just keep my big mouth shut.

When's the divorce?

Oh, Larue. Come on!

GIDGET: Larue! Get up here.

They got me on hold, this long distance's for you.

It's your Chicago tour.

All the air conditioners went out and the whole group is melting.

Let 'em. Their check's cleared.

Larue!

Oh, all right. I am coming.

Yeah.

[STUTTERS] No, no... I know, I know...

Here, Gidge, I'll talk to 'em.

She's right here.

I'll get you a pencil.

Hi, Mr. Haymaker...

What?

Oh, they've all gone back on.

Oh, everybody's not melting anymore.

That's so nice. I am very pleased.

Well, thank you very much for calling.

Have a good time in Chicago. [CHUCKLES]

Goodbye, Mr. Haymaker.

Ugh.

Hey, what you got?

Mmm.

Well...

We got one of two possibilities here.

Either Jeff's collecting business cards,

or he's having an affair with this doctor broad.

Larue!

[ENGINE STARTS]

GIDGET: I want you to know that I am not doing this because of what Larue said.

Or that I don't trust my husband.

It's just a matter of basic human curiosity.

That's all.

[UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS] Boy.

One little discovery like your marriage may be in trouble

can ruin your whole morning.

I just hope Kim and Albert are having a good time.

I mean, you've got to salvage something on a beautiful day like this.

[MUSIC CONTINUES]

Wow, I've never seen so much of water.

I'm so jazzed! Isn't it great?

Very impressive.

This is where Aunt Gidget told me she first met Uncle Jeff.

Isn't it gorgeous?

[ALBERT SPEAKING FRENCH]

Huh?

Oh, it's a beautiful beach.

Uh...

Come on, let's go down there. I want to get closer to the action.

[THE BEACH BOYS: "SURFER GIRL"]

♪ Little surfer, little one ♪

♪ Made my heart come all undone ♪

♪ Do you love me? ♪

♪ Do you, surfer girl? ♪

♪ Surfer girl My little surfer girl ♪

[GUESTS CHEERING]

♪ I have watched you on the shore ♪

♪ Standing by the ocean's roar ♪

♪ Do you love me... ♪

GIDGET [LAUGHING]: Moondoggie, put me down.

JEFF: No, it's about time people looked up to you.

[GIDGET LAUGHS]

GIDGET: Jeff, take off The Kahoona's hat.

JEFF: No muscle-bound guy is taking off my hat.

GIDGET: Oh, The Great Kahoona. He was the best.

JEFF: You're now a member of the club, Gidget.

GIDGET: What's a Gidget?

Girl midget. What else?

KAHOONA: Hey, let's get Gidget in this picture.

JEFF: No question about it.

GIDGET: Why am I always ending up on people's shoulders?

JEFF: We keep telling you, Gidge,

we want people to look up to you.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER AND LAUGHTER]

[CLOCK STRIKES]

Hi, honey. Hi, Daddy.

You forgot the honey.

Now, how do you expect me to win the marathon without honey, honey?

Because you're the best.

Francine... I'm fine.

No, you're not. Of course, I am.

Oh.

Is that why you told me you were fine before I ever asked

if there was anything the matter?

Did you teach logic or English all those years?

I raised you all those years.

Now, come on.

All right. I just found out that Jeff...

Daddy, I wished I never started the agency.

It's getting in the way of everything.

Oh, honey, that's what being in business is all about.

Well, then maybe it's just not worth it.

Not if it's going to cause problems for me and Jeff.

What problems?

Dad, we have two jobs and we can't even pay our bills.

I mean, we can, but not on time.

I mean, it just seems like... I'll tell you what I think.

Before you let that famous imagination of yours run wild,

why not the two of you grab a couple of boards, go to the beach,

and watch your problems fade away on the first five-footer, hmm?

That's great. That's a great idea!

I know. [EXCLAIMS] Yes!

Tonight, after work, Jeff and me. Jeff and I.

I know.

Nominative case. Nominative case.

Mwah! Thank you, Daddy.

Sure.

Oh, Francine, there's something else. I meant to talk to you

about it yesterday at the barbeque.

I can't now, Dad. I've got to go find our surf boards

and call Jeff and get to work.

You know, and save my marriage!

Morning! Oh, excuse me.

When is it proper to straighten up?

Proper?

We're looking for his contact lens.

Oh.

Ah! It's there.

Great.

Larue, I got to talk to you.

What? Come here.

Come here, I got a great idea.

Well, tell me. Okay, listen.

Jeff and I are going surfing tonight,

and I was thinking how great it would be

if the whole gang could be there to meet us.

I'm talkin' everybody, Larue.

The Great Kahoona, Hot Dog, Scooter Boy,

Slim, Malibu Mac. [GIGGLES]

Honey, that's impossible.

They're scattered all over the world.

Kahoona's probably surfing Venus by now.

They got surfing in Venus?

No. I'm not talking about tonight.

A reunion?

A reunion birthday party for Jeff.

Oh! Oh, I love it.

It's been 12 years since all of us were together.

Oh, Gidget, you're a genius.

When is Jeff's birthday? It's a week from Saturday.

He's gonna be 30.

And it'll be a surprise?

Of course. Oh.

Larue, this will give us a chance to get back to where it all started.

I love it.

I hate it.

What?

I'll be doing the tour in Hawaii.

Oh, Johnny, I know, but...

This tour can make or break our agency.

Right.

It'll either get us over the hump or under it.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Look. Look over there.

Wow!

Look at him.

He's the best!

Oh, I'm so excited. Isn't this great?

Look at him go. Look! Look! Look!

He made it!

Look at him ride.

Pretty good.

Doesn't the sun feel great?

All right. I'm going.

Good ride. Yeah. It was all right.

Hey, check this out. What?

KIM: Ooh.

[EXHALES]

Hey, you want me to, uh... No, no, no.

I'll take care of it.

[CHUCKLES] Oh, Mick's going to take care of it.

[SCOFFS] Yeah. Third time this week.

[GRUNTS]

How you doing?

Great. Hi.

Yeah? Terrific.

KIM: It really looks fantastic out there.

Yeah.

You surf?

No. I've never had the opportunity.

You never had the opportunity?

Oh, would you like to learn?

Are you kidding?

Look, you come out here about seven o'clock tomorrow morning,

and I'll show you a few things.

Would you like that? Would I?

Oh, do I need to bring a board?

No. We can use mine.

Great.

All right.

Who's your friend?

Oh. I'm sorry. This is Albert.

And I'm Kim.

Hi. Albert Winslow.

I'm Micky.

Nice to meet you.

MICK: Hey, look, uh... Albert.

If it's a little early for you tomorrow, I can pick her up. No problem.

Oh, no. It's no problem at all. I get up way before 7:00.

Whatever.

I'll see you in the morning, okay?

Okay.

I don't believe it.

I'm so excited. And he's such an awesome hunk.

He does exude athletic confidence.

Well...

Piece of cake.

All right. All right.

Come on, let's go. I've got to get a new bathing suit.

I wouldn't know where to take you.

Come on. Don't worry. I'll find a place. Oh, fine.

Oh, by the way, what's an awesome hunk?

You know, an incredible looking guy.

ALBERT: You know, this is like learning a whole new language.

[MACHINERY WHIRRING]

GIDGET: This is yet another project of Bedford Construction.

They keep building these condos.

If you happen to see a beautiful, shapely blonde woman hanging around,

it's probably Jeff's boss, Anne Bedford herself.

She likes to keep a watchful eye on... things.

Hey, Bobby, do me a favor.

Make sure the 12 bys are heat treated.

Check it out yourself.

Will do. I appreciate it.

Seems like you're in a pretty good mood.

Yeah, I am.

My wife called and we're going surfing.

Ah, just like old times, huh?

I hope so.

Are we going to finish this thing on schedule or not?

Well, it looks like we might bring it in ahead of schedule.

That would please me.

We've been very lucky with the weather and the crew and it's all coming together.

I want you to come with me to my car for a minute.

I want to show you something.

Oh, sure. Come on.

I don't mind telling you, Jeff,

that if it does come in early and everybody's happy with it,

there's a nice bonus due for you.

Well, that would please me and the two banks that currently own my home.

[LAUGHS] It would please me very much.

It's looking very good.

Watch out!

ANNE: Oh!

Oh!

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS IN RELIEF]

Sorry, I didn't see you. Oh, it's okay.

Are you all right, Mrs. Bedford?

Fine. I'm fine.

What the hell are you doing, man?

You could have run over and killed somebody. Mike, Mike. It's all right.

Will you just try and be little more careful, please?

I'm real sorry about that, Jeff. That's all right.

MIKE: Okay. Come on, guys. Somebody pick this up.

Are you okay?

Yes.

Thank you, Jeff.

[CHUCKLES] Well...

No problem. I...

I just hope I didn't wrinkle the big "S" on my undershirt.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

You sure you're all right? I'm fine, yes. Thank you.

Excuse me while I exercise an old executive privilege.

Oh, you're more upset than I thought.

[SIGHS]

It will pass just as soon as my heart gets started again.

Here.

What do you think?

Solar heating. I like it.

Notice that I'm coming to depend on you more and more?

Well, I get the feeling you've done all right without me.

Jeff, I want you to know that this company has been greatly enhanced by your work.

Our bid was the same as Welman's,

but they went with us based on your reputation.

If my head gets any bigger, I'm not gonna be able to get out of the car.

[CHUCKLES]

Then I guess we'll just have to stay in here.

[KNOCKING ON CAR WINDOW]

Excuse me, Mrs. Bedford. Mmm-hmm?

Jeff, we might have a problem with the overhangs on those first six units.

Yeah. I'll be right there. Thank you.

Jeff. Wait, wait, wait.

This is all new to you, isn't it?

What's that?

Being a life saver.

Yeah, I guess so.

Well...

There's a first time for everything.

GIDGET: Larue? LARUE: Hmm?

I found out who Jane Wagner PhD is.

You did?

She's a marriage counselor.

[SIGHS] I've been so stupid. How could I not see this coming?

You did, didn't you?

Did Jeff talk to you?

Yeah.

But it wasn't so much what he said,

it's what he didn't say.

You guys really moved apart, haven't you?

Oh, is the house really worth it, Gidget?

I mean, it seems like a heck of a sacrifice to be making.

Two jobs and everything.

Larue, it's what we always dreamed of,

what we always wanted.

I know.

Besides,

this agency will start to make a profit soon.

[SCOFFS] You really do believe that, don't you?

Well, we've got to.

And when Johnny takes off, it's gonna give me a chance

to get reacquainted with my husband again.

That's my girl.

It's about time I got my priorities straight.

That's terrific, kiddo.

Listen. Speaking of priorities,

do you want me to go ahead and comfirm these reservations

for the Turtle Bay Hilton?

Whatever.

I got to go find our surfboards, get some wax, and hit the waves.

What about priorities?

GIDGET: Yeah. Priorities.

Like why haven't Jeff and I been surfing in almost two years?

When did this board get so heavy?

Well, all that is going to change

as soon as I get down to the beach and meet Jeff and...

[SIGHS] Ironing board, of course.

Now, where's Jeff's board?

There it is.

Right between Christmas and... [GROANS]

Halloween.

[BEACH BOYS: "SURFIN' SAFARI"]

MAN [ON RADIO]: If you're on your way home from the beach

and know you had a great day, we got more on the scene while on the way tomorrow.

Here's another Californian classic to get you home.

♪ At Huntington and Malibu They're shooting the pier ♪

♪ At Rincon they're walking the nose... ♪

GIDGET: I don't want to tell you the kind of day I've had.

I'm sure you've got your own problems.

The real problem is, I'm a little late for the beach.

There's always the chance Jeff is a little late, too.

Isn't there?

♪ I'm going to take you surfing with me ♪ ♪ Surfin' safari ♪

♪ Let's go surfin' now ♪

GIDGET: This is the longest light in the city. [SIGHS]

I could read War and Peace before it turned.

[SIGHS IN FRUSTRATION] Gidget. Relax.

You'll get there in plenty of time.

There's not all that much at stake here,

except for a little surfing and any chance at happiness for the rest of my life.

Come on, for God's sake!

That was very dumb.

I'm over reacting as usual.

[TIRE HISSING]

♪ Come on, baby, wait and see now ♪

♪ I'm gonna take you surfin' with me ♪

♪ Come along now, baby, wait and see now ♪

♪ I'm gonna take you surfin' with me ♪

♪ Let's go surfin' now Everybody's learning how ♪

♪ Come on and safari with me ♪

♪ Come on and safari with me ♪

♪ With me ♪ ♪ Surfin' safari ♪

♪ Surfin' safari ♪

[YELLS] Jeff!

GIDGET: Hi. Hi. Hi.

Are you okay? Yes. I'm sorry.

I got a flat tire right in the middle of San Fernando

and I couldn't find a spare. I think the Germans hid it or something,

Then I couldn't find the jack,

and when I finally found the jack I had no idea how to use it.

In my entire life, I've never seen a jack like that.

Well, we better get home and have some dinner.

Are you kidding?

What about surfing? I found the boards and everything.

Well, if they come with headlights maybe,

but otherwise, I think it's going to be too dark.

Oh, come on. We've got plenty of time. No. No.

Gidge, Gidge. Let's just forget it, okay?

Let's go on home and have a nice evening.

I don't think you're being very fair. Fair?

Now, wait a minute. Instead of wasting time talking about it

we could be out there doing it.

Wasting time?

I've been sitting here for almost two hours.

Now, I left work early, which I shouldn't have done,

and I end up sitting here staring at the water.

So, I'm gonna ask you to just drop it.

Is that what Dr. Wagner told you to say?

Dr. Wagner?

How do you know about Dr. Wagner?

Her card fell out of your wallet. I...

I followed you to her office.

Well, I never should have gotten you that collection of Nancy Drew stories.

Jeff...

Why didn't you come to me? Why didn't you talk to me?

I was embarrassed to tell you, Gidge.

I was embarrassed to tell you that I am jealous of the fact

that you are spending so much time on your career and away from me.

That lady shrink is even telling me

I'm jealous of the fact that you're your own boss

and run your own business.

Did you tell her that I'm barely breaking even?

Well, that's another thing.

We're both working our tails off,

and we're barely making it from pay check to pay check.

What if one of us should get sick? We're not gonna get sick.

We shouldn't have to live that way.

I mean, I make damn good money, Gidge.

I mean, what the hell is the point?

The point is that we both always wanted the big house with a white picket fence.

Yeah? Well, now we got the house and we can't afford the fence.

All right, now just listen to me. Listen to me for a minute.

We'll make the payments and we'll get ahead, you'll see.

But the most important thing is that we spend time together.

Time alone.

Jeff, it feels like we haven't spent time alone forever.

[CHUCKLES]

But when that tour leaves,

we'll have so much time to spend together. [CHUCKLES]

[PAGER BEEPING]

[SIGHS] Oh.

Go ahead and get that.

No, I don't want to get it.

No, no. It could be important. Money call.

You want the fence, the paint, and the nails?

You know how expensive a good nail is today?

[CHUCKLES]

Moondoggie, I love you.

I'll be right back.

It's Larue.

Oh, this better be important, like she's dying or I'm going to kill her.

I love you, too.

It's me.

Don't correct my English, I have Dad for that. Just tell me what it is.

Johnny's sick. He's got the Philippine flu

and a doctor said he might be laid up as much as three weeks.

I think we better start looking for a replacement for the Hawaii tour.

Like, tonight.

Thanks.

Any problems? Oh, no. Not really.

Hey, you know what? You did a nice thing.

I did. Uh-huh.

You went out and found Jane Wagner, PhD, marriage counselor,

and tried to make things better for us.

Well, I didn't exactly find her, Anne helped.

Anne?

Anne Bedford?

Yeah. She and Jane went to school together.

They were sorority sisters.

[LAUGHS] Well...

Boola-boola!

Isn't that terrific?

Are you telling me that you discussed us with Anne Bedford?

You discussed private,

personal, intimate, with Anne "can't be too rich or too thin" Bedford?

Gidget, wait a minute. Anne is a friend.

Who else is in this sorority? Maybe we should call them and see how we're doing.

Anne cares about us.

About you. Anne does not care about me, she cares about you.

What's she gonna buy you next? A gold leash?

I'll see you at home.

Well, you better check in with Anne first!

You might already tell her I'll be late, because I'm going surfing!

[GASPS]

[SOBBING]

[MELLOW INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

KIM: Aunt Gidget?

Yeah?

Good morning, sweetheart.

I don't wanna live.

You, too?

What's... What's the matter?

Albert was suppose to pick me up at 7:00 and it's almost 8:00.

I had the most fantastic date for surfing

than I'll ever have in my entire life.

And now, it's all down the drain.

I don't wanna live.

You know that when you talk like that,

you sound like somebody I used to be.

Don't worry about being late.

If the surf's up, he's going to be there all day.

I'll take you to the beach.

Oh, Aunt Gidget. Thank you, thank you.

[CHUCKLES] I'm the happiest person in the world.

GIDGET: From "I don't wanna live"

to one of the happiest person in the world in 15 seconds.

At my age that's called manic depressive.

At her age, normal.

Sometimes, adulthood really stinks.

KIM: How come you didn't have dinner with Uncle Jeff and me last night?

GIDGET: Oh, I was at the agency trying to find a replacement

for Johnny till after midnight.

Why, what did you eat? Beef Wellington.

At our house? Who cooked?

In a restaurant, it was really neat.

Anne, let me have a sip of her wine. Anne?

Anne was there?

Yeah. She's so pretty.

I love the way she does her hair. Don't you think she's pretty?

Wait, wait a second. How did you happen to get together with Anne?

It was just a coincidence, we sat right down across. We were lucky, huh?

Yeah.

Lucky.

Anne is after my husband.

I can't find a tour guide for Hawaii.

And I can't locate the old gang for the reunion.

How lucky can you get?

[CAR HONKING]

Hi, honey. Hi, Daddy.

What's this? Uh, sorry, it's the best I could do on short notice.

Where you've been? Had to take Kimmy to the beach.

Ah.

Good morning, Mr. Hover.

Uh, Gidget, my car broke down.

Did Kim get... No problem, Albert.

I took her. You can meet her out there.

Oh, that's very nice of you. Thank you. Sure.

Dad, listen, I'll talk to you later.

I've got to get to work and see if I can find a replacement for Johnny,

which I probably can't do.

Oh, I have an idea about that.

Well, great. We'll talk later. I love you.

Toodles! Francine!

Uh... Albert, you know, I may have a solution to...

Sorry, Mr. Hover, I have to get out to Malibu,

but I'll be happy to talk to you later.

But... But, Albert!

Doesn't anybody want to listen to me?

I will.

[UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

Albert!

Hey!

Hey.

What's your name?

Albert Winslow.

Yeah, well, Albert Winslow, I'm Kirk, this is Darryl.

We're friends of the Mick.

How nice for you.

Yeah, well, Mick wanted you to know that he can take it from here.

He can take the lady home.

Locals only! Get it?

I don't understand.

Don't you speak English, man?

Yes, old, middle and modern.

So long, un-local.

ALBERT: Just a moment. This is a public area.

Can we talk about this here?

Now, just a moment...

All right, all right. I can do it myself. I can walk.

Thank you.

Watch out, Mickey. [GIGGLES]

Whoa!

Okay, Frank.

Thanks for trying.

[GROANS] I can't do it.

While everybody's at Jeff's birthday yelling "Surprise,"

I'm gonna be at Hawaii, saying, "On your left is a pineapple field."

Every tour guide in California is working, Gidget.

We'll never make it.

Yes, we will.

Now, we have four whole days left

and Jeff will never hear me say the words...

Jeff.

I have to go to Hawaii.

I've been trying to find a replacement for Johnny all weekend,

and the last possibility fell through about two hours ago.

Well, how soon do you have to go?

I have a 1:30 out of LAX.

Well, you're really in a rush. How long you're gonna be gone?

It's a nine-day tour.

[SIGHS]

Hawaii is really beautiful.

Be careful.

And don't get too close to the edge of the Pali cliffs.

It could be a heck of a fall.

Jeff, don't.

Listen. I don't want to go any place without you, especially now.

I know.

Something is pulling us apart.

I don't know what it is. It's not like it used to be. I wish...

Did you see what Christie did to these window... Oh!

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

Excuse me. GIDGET: Oh. No, no. Anne.

I was just leaving.

How are you, Anne? Very well. Thank you. And you?

Fine, thank you.

Don't you look cute?

Thank you.

I'll walk you to the elevator.

No, don't.

You have to work.

I'll call you when I get there.

Mmm-hmm.

Where's she going in such a hurry?

A tour to Hawaii.

Really? For how long? Nine days.

Oh! What a shame. She'll miss the party.

What party? Next Friday.

You're invited.

I guess you'll just have to come alone.

I guess so.

Let's look at this one. Uh-huh.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

GIDGET: Hawaii!

I think God comes here when he wants to get away from it all.

All I wanted was to get back to it all.

All meaning Jeff,

and the reunion party.

There is one good thing, though.

My tour group.

[TOURISTS SINGING]

Welcome to Hawaii. [CHUCKLES]

Don't forget your things, okay?

Is this paradise?

All right, now.

I think the first thing that we're going to do...

First, we're gonna unpack our things and we're going to get over...

Look! Shops.

[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]

[UKULELE MUSIC PLAYING]

MEN: ♪ Oh, we're goin' to a hukilau ♪

♪ Huki-huki-huki huki-huki-hukilau ♪

♪ Everybody loves the hukilau ♪

What's with the music?

It's Hawaiian. It's nice.

Oh, I want a boogie.

Gidget dear, this is a beautiful luau.

We are all very pleased. Mary Jane, you make it so easy.

You're all so much fun, and full of energy.

This doesn't feel like a job. It's much more like a vacation.

BOY: Hang on, Bridget!

BOY: Okay. BRIDGET: Oh, oh. Slipping.

BRIDGET: Catch me! [LAUGHS]

This is a beautiful place, isn't it?

Incredible.

But you'd rather be back in California with that husband of yours.

How did you know?

I may be old, but I still have good hearing.

You've been on the phone since you've got here.

[UKULELE MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, where did you get those?

I borrowed them from a kid up the street.

Really? They look brand-new. Must be a nice guy.

Oh, yeah. He's a great guy.

And if we don't mess up his boards,

he promised to return my pink slip.

[WAVES SPLASHING]

All right!

Whoo!

How you doing, Kim?

[EXCLAIMS] Good fun, huh, guys?

Hey, how's it going?

He's a wipe-out artist.

KIM: That's my Uncle Jeff.

Your Uncle Jeff? Mmm-hmm.

I'm sorry, but you sounded like a kid when you said that.

You sure you're 18 or what?

I've always called him Uncle Jeff,

even though our ages are very close.

It's just something my mother asked me to do.

Kirk, come on, let's go meet Uncle Jeff.

All right.

Hey, want a beer? Oh, no.

Uh... Sure.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

Uncle Jeff.

Quite the beach man.

Nobody owns the ocean, kid.

We're just out for a ride.

Fine. We'll join you.

Hey, man.

You're all right?

We were real worried about you there for a second.

Kind of early for that, isn't it?

Normally you don't drink till after 9:00.

Let's go.

I can take her home, Uncle Jeff.

Normally, I'd let you, kid, but if you drive the way you surf,

she's never gonna get there.

Hey, man, what did you say?

I have to go. You know, shopping and everything.

I'll see you later?

You're not really mad at me, are you, Uncle Jeff?

Grounded? Are you serious?

[ENGINE STARTS]

GIDGET: When we got to the Turtle Bay Hilton,

everybody went water crafting, which gave me a chance to call Johnny in Los Angeles.

His fever's down, all the way to a 101.

Oh, boy!

Our next stop was Kauai,

the most beautiful island of them all.

And now, we're going to see the rest of the island on this.

It's the famous helicopter ride around Kauai.

I should be excited, I should be thrilled.

I should be home.

Jeff's birthday is tomorrow.

You comin'?

Are you the pilot? If that's all right with you.

Yes, it is.

I'm also the owner.

Ron Levering. Oh.

You must be Gidget. Yes, I am.

I spoke to you on the phone. I just didn't expect you to be so...

I didn't expect you to be quite so beautiful.

MARY JANE: Come on, Gidget.

Let's get this big beater off the ground.

Thank you.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

Do you fly all the time?

Yeah, when I'm in the island.

I travel quite a bit, however.

Matter of fact, I just came back from China.

You've ever been there?

Only vicariously.

Every time I eat chop suey or read fortune cookies.

[CHUCKLES]

Gidget, you're terrific.

Hey, Mr. Pilot. Keep your eyes on the road, not her.

Yes, ma'am.

Although, I'd rather be looking at her.

She was drinking a beer with these kids, huh?

Oh, yeah. Probably just trying to impress them.

Punks have taken over the beach.

Time sure changes, Russ.

Well, do you think Kim is really safe with that bunch?

Oh, sure.

All the surf bums are acting more territorial these days.

Yeah, I remember some surf bums who wouldn't let

a little shrimp of a 15-year-old girl join their esteemed group.

Yeah, I remember that.

Whatever happened to that kid?

Do, uh, you feel like talking about it?

[GRUNTING]

Uh... Not now, Russ.

I've got to get ready to go to Anne's party.

Thank you.

GIDGET: There's the rest of my tour group waiting for us.

They are the non-flyers.

RON: Buddy, out.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Thank you, Ron. That was really beautiful.

Yeah. It was a pleasure. Oh!

Gidget, I'd like you to come visit my home.

Gidget!

What is it, Harry?

Oh!

WOMAN: This place is paradise...

This came for you when we were aboard the ship. It's a radiogram.

When I read it, I almost jumped overboard

and swam here! Oh, it's Johnny!

[EXCLAIMS] He's gonna be here today.

This is wonderful. I know.

Let's get to the hotel. That's where he is meeting us.

Come on. Okay.

Oh! Ron! Uh... I have to go. But, thank you.

And I'd love to see your home one day.

China, too.

Come on, Bob. Let's go.

Take us to the Kaoli hotel.

I've never been to this part of the island before

and I don't know what the hotel looks like.

Do you?

I don't know. This is my first tour.

Perfect.

[STAMMERING] Straight ahead, on your left

is the Plantation Cucoli.

A more traditional type of Hawaiian hotel.

We're going to be staying here tonight

and then tomorrow it's onto Waimea,

where Captain James Cook landed to become

the discoverer of the Hawaiian Islands.

[TOURISTS CHATTERING]

I don't understand.

Where is everybody?

[ALL CHATTERING]

Um, they must have gotten the dates mixed up

and they didn't know how to fly the staff.

But I'm going to figure out right this second,

if you'll just be a little patient with me. Okay?

Good. Excuse me. [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

Bob...

How long will it take us to get to Kapaa?

BOB: I don't know. I can't read this lousy map.

Oh...

It's a map of Maui. Sorry.

Get with it.

Gidget has a 5:30 flight from Honolulu.

Everyone knows your predicament, dear,

and we're all rooting for you. You betcha!

We can take care of ourselves till this Johnny fellow gets here.

I couldn't do that.

My responsibility is right here.

Look! Somebody's coming up.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

What's going on here?

Who are you people?

GIDGET [STAMMERING]: We're here on tour.

I'm Gidget from Gidget Travel.

Uh...

Are you the manager of the hotel?

Are you crazy? This is a private home.

You mean this isn't the Plantation Cucoli near Princeville?

Princeville is on the other side of the island.

Maybe you could show us how to get there.

The police will show you how to get there.

TOURISTS: Police?

That won't be necessary, George. Thank you.

Hello, Gidget.

Welcome to my home.

Small island, isn't it?

Kim? I'm back. You're hungry, yet?

No, thank you. I'm never eating again.

A-ha. The death diet.

Well, when you change your mind. I've got cheeseburgers,

French fries, and lots of hidden junk food.

[CHUCKLES]

[UPBEAT UKULELE MUSIC PLAYING]

ALL: ♪ I want to go back to my little grass shack ♪

♪ In Kealakekua, Hawaii ♪

♪ Hawaii ♪

♪ I want to be with all the kanes and wahines that I used to know ♪

♪ I can hear the old guitars playing ♪

♪ On the beach at Hoonaunau ♪

♪ I can hear the Hawaiians saying ♪

[SINGING IN HAWAIIAN]

What a shame.

What?

I thought we were gonna be in on the middle of a bust.

Breaking and entering, cuffs, mugshots.

You know, the whole nine yards.

[CHUCKLES]

Now, don't you worry.

You left the message at Plantation Cucoli.

I'm sure Johnny's got it and is on his way.

Thanks for trying to cheer me up.

Everything's gonna be fine.

You have to believe that.

♪ Where the Humuhumu, Nukunuku a puaa goes swimming by ♪

♪ Where the Humuhumu, Nukunuku a puaa goes swimming by ♪

[ALL CHEERING]

Bravo! You're all wonderful.

Thank you.

Champagne? Oh... No. Thank you.

Maybe later? Maybe.

Well, I'm glad you could all stop by this afternoon.

Mistakenly or otherwise.

Thank you for having us.

I would imagine running your own travel agency must keep you very busy, huh?

You have no idea.

Well, hang in there.

As tough as it may get sometimes,

there is nothing more gratifying

than having a business of your own.

I got my start that way.

But you didn't have a travel agency, did you? No.

Just one little oil well in Alaska.

Gidget, would you like to see the rest of my home?

Say yes.

Is this the tour of... [SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE] in Maui?

Oh! It's Johnny! You're not sick anymore.

No! Oriental penicillin, duck soup.

Boy, this is way off the beaten path.

Hello, folks.

I'm Johnny Soon, here late.

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

I'm so glad to see you. Mwah!

Oh, I hate to say, hello-goodbye, Gidge,

but you better run, or you'll never make it.

Where is it that you need to go, Gidget?

I have a plane waiting at Lihue to take me to Honolulu.

Lihue is an hour away. You'll never make it.

I just said that. Well, I've got to make it.

All right. Then you will.

I'll take you.

You have a fast car?

Fast helicopter. Get your stuff.

Okay. Uh... Bob, will you please get my things out of the bus?

Yes, ma'am.

I'm going home, everybody!

[ALL CHEERING]

MARY JANE: Have a wonderful party, dear.

HARRY: Yes. Say hello to that doggie moon of yours.

MARY JANE: Moondoggie.

GIDGET: I will. I will.

I'll call Jeff tomorrow from Princeville,

after the surprise.

Terrific.

Goodbye, everybody.

ALL: Goodbye.

MARY JANE: Thank you so much.

Thanks.

WOMAN: Say "Hi" to Moondoggie.

[SIGHS]

Okay. On to Lihue.

Nope. Honolulu.

What?

Ron...

That's very nice of you.

Not nice at all. Just sensible.

I want to see you again.

Well,

if things don't work out in Los Angeles, you just might.

[CHUCKLES]

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[ENGINE REVVING]

JEFF: Hi, Anne. ANNE: Come on in.

I don't understand. Where is everybody?

Everybody just arrived.

[CHUCKLES] You mean, I'm it? You certainly are.

Whatever you say.

Champagne all right? Fine.

For you.

KIM: Dear uncle Jeff,

I have a date with Mickey that cannot be broken.

I know I'm disobeying you, but my crazy teenage chemistry

shoved logic right out the window. Kim.

[CLOCK TICKING]

[COUGHS]

[DOG BARKING]

[CAR APPROACHING]

What you got there? Hamburgers?

Yeah. Good.

We don't have to waste anytime with dinner.

Come on. I wanna show you something.

All right.

[SOFT ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Oh, Anne. This is just beautiful out here.

Just beautiful.

I'm glad you like it.

You live right over there.

Yeah.

Looks very small from up here. I know.

Sometimes, I wish I could just reach down, pick it up and shake it.

Just like a miniature little house.

Then out you'd fall and I'd have you right in the palm of my hand.

[CHUCKLES]

Why not? You have everything else.

Not quite.

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

You're not trying very hard.

Anne? Hmm?

I'm not so sure this is so wise.

Why not?

You're a very beautiful woman,

and if I weren't married...

How married are you, Jeff?

KIM: This is an interesting picture.

Yeah? Let me see. Here.

This one.

Oh, yeah.

That's me shooting the Pier at Manhattan.

All right. Fantastic.

Hey, you want a beer? No, thanks.

Not right now.

Yes, so what's your story?

I don't understand.

What's your story?

I mean, I like you, you like me. Right?

Yeah.

So, we've been here for over two hours.

And we've gone through my records,

we've looked through my books.

Only four.

We didn't say a thing about the last one.

We didn't come here to talk books.

But I've never read Pumping Iron.

I'll let you borrow it sometime!

Why are you yelling at me? I don't like that.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

I'm sorry. You know something?

When you're right, you're right.

I shouldn't have yelled at you. I'm really sorry, Kim.

That's okay.

You seem a little tense.

Maybe we should try it again, huh? What...

Better? I mean, for a second time?

A little better.

But I still feel that little bit of that tension.

I got the answer, though.

What?

A hot tub.

A hot tub? You have one here?

No, no. Guy out back has one. He's out of town. He left me the keys.

But I didn't bring my bathing suit.

You don't need a suit.

Let's go.

GIDGET: Los Angeles, here I am.

Made it. I'm home.

Now, the only question is...

Do I slip into bed next to Jeff without waking him?

Or do the surprises start tonight?

Francine?

[CHUCKLES] Daddy.

What... What are you doing here?

I live here. [LAUGHS]

I know, but what are you doing here?

Johnny took over the tour,

and I wanted to surprise Jeff.

So, that means that you can be here

for the surprise party and all?

Yeah. That's wonderful.

[SIGHS]

I didn't think I was gonna make it, Daddy.

What are you doing here?

Oh... Uh...

Well, Jeff had a business meeting,

and, um, I, uh,

I had to stand in as a chaperone for, um... for Kim.

You mean, Jeff isn't home yet?

Well, no. Uh, at least I don't think he is.

Of course, you know, it's possible that he just slipped passed me

and went right up to bed.

You know, so he wouldn't disturb me when I was sleeping.

That doesn't sound like Jeff.

[SIGHS]

Business meeting?

That's what he told me, honey.

Francine,

I know how late it is, I know we're both tired.

So, I'll make this as fast as I can. Now look.

[SIGHS] You and Jeff are doing everything you can to hold on to this house.

I think both of you would have been here tonight

if it weren't for the financial burden

of maintaining this home and the problems it creates.

[SIGHS]

I don't know why I sound so formal about this.

All I'm trying to say is if you need any help...

Dad, we can handle it.

Just don't worry, okay?

I'm not worried, honey.

I just want you to be sure that it's worth it.

I know.

Okay.

Thanks, Dad.

[SIGHS]

Anytime, kiddo. [CHUCKLES]

Good night. Good night, Daddy.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

Kim?

Albert. Hi, it's Gidget.

I'm sorry to wake you. I have a big favor to ask you.

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS]

What are you doing in there? The water's great.

Come on in!

Here I am.

Well, I hope you're not going to wear that towel in here.

[CHUCKLES] Of course not.

Where did you get the suit?

Found it. In the bathroom.

You think the owner won't mind?

Well...

Nah.

[SIGHS]

Isn't this great?

It's incredible!

I know where he lives. I've been following the little budala.

That's Yugoslavian for awesome jerk.

Albert, I'm beginning to like your style.

Do you feel like the tension going away?

I think so.

I'm not so sure.

I think I better give you the old hands-on test.

Come on. Slide on over.

I think it's gonna work.

[TIRES SCREECHES]

ALBERT: It's that one right there. GIDGET: Where?

ALBERT: With the light on.

Um, this one? Yeah.

[DOORBELL RINGING]

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

KIM [YELLS]: No, Mickey! Stop it! Get out of my way!

GIDGET: Come on!

Oh. Hi.

Good morning is more like it. Are you okay? [BOTH PANTING]

Yeah, sure. A little... A little wet, but otherwise... I can't believe this.

What the hell's your story Kim, huh?

Kim, go change. Go! But...

[KIM SIGHS]

Her story is that she is 15-and-a-half years old.

Short story.

She told me she was 18.

Well, she looks like she's 18.

Hey, look. You people don't know where I'm coming from.

Yeah, but I know where you're going if you see her again.

Oh, yeah?

I left the bathing suit soaking in the sink.

I'm sure Mickey appreciates your thoughtfulness.

Come on. We're going home.

[SIGHS] Women.

[GROANS] Ow!

[SIGHS]

Would you like to talk about it?

I was going to come back. I just needed time to think.

Kimmy...

He kissed me.

I've really never been kissed before.

Everyone thinks that I'm so experienced.

That I've done everything, because I look older.

I haven't.

I haven't even really been on a real date my whole life.

Let's face it. I'm a social nerd.

I know what you're feeling.

I went through the same thing.

All right, the dates have changed, but the needs are still the same.

There's time, Kimmy.

You're 15.

15-and-half

isn't the closing date.

As a matter of fact, it's just the beginning.

Tell you what?

Why don't we sleep on it, and we'll talk about it in the morning?

Okay?

Okay.

You have sweet dreams. [SIGHS]

Aunt Gidget...

Yeah?

Thanks for saving me.

I'm not the hero.

Albert is.

He's the one who knew where to find you.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[SIGHS]

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Hi!

Hi.

You look nice.

[SIGHS]

Hey.

Gidge...

Must have been a very formal business meeting.

Oh, come on. It was a dinner at Anne's.

The point is you're home.

Well, I've been home.

I got in about an hour and half ago.

Well, if you've been home for an hour and half,

how come you're just now unpacking?

Well, I had a few things to do first.

Like say good night to my father and go find Kim.

[STAMMERS] What you talking about?

While you were at your business meeting,

Kim was being attacked in a hot tub by your surfer friend Mickey!

No, I thought your father was going to watch Kim.

[SHOUTS] Till three o'clock in the morning?

[SIGHS]

[WHISPERING] I am not going to yell here.

If you would like to join me,

I am going to the garage to yell.

[GRUNTS] Oh, I can't believe you'd leave my father out on a limb like that!

And I wanted my homecoming to be special.

It was special.

I am very glad to see you.

Well, great.

Because I just had to talk with Kim to get her over her little trauma,

and I told her that I went through the same thing

when I was her age.

I never attacked you in a hot tub.

We didn't have hot tubs then.

Oh! Just shut up and listen to me for a second.

Because what I didn't tell her,

was that all the pain, and the anger

and the embarassment was worth it, because I found you.

Now,

What I need to know is, am I going to have to go through that pain all over again?

Or can you be trusted?

Well, if you're gonna make some crazy, stupid suggestion about tonight,

I'm not even going to dignify that.

'Cause I love you, you numb skull.

Do you mean that?

No, I've been faking it for the last 12 years.

Talk about missing a point.

Hyah! [GROANING] [GASPS]

Jeff, honey?

Are you all right?

[GROANING]

[EXCLAIMS CONCERNEDLY]

Ow. You all right?

I'm fine.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Okay.

I missed the point,

you missed the bag.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

The only reason I went over to Anne's tonight

was to stay in her good graces.

And because she signs the pay checks

that almost keep this roof over our heads.

And you know what?

To hell with her.

To hell with the roof.

Let's sell the house.

[CHUCKLES] What? I mean, it isn't worth anything

if we can't enjoy it, right?

Do you remember how happy we were

in that dinky little apartment in Florida?

Oh, sure baby, but...

We were kids then.

We're not kids anymore. We have responsibilities.

What do you mean we're not kids?

I'm 27. You're 29.

Wrong. I have been 30 for over three hours now.

I bet you forgot all about that, didn't you?

No, I didn't forget.

Well, let's do something about it.

I say we grab the boards, and we go to Rincon.

GIDGET: But the boards were stolen.

Well, we can body surf.

Still float, don't ya, Gidge?

I only have to go to the office for a few minutes tomorrow.

Albert can take care of Kim. It's going to be perfect.

You got to work, don't you?

Just... Just for half a day.

I'll be home by one o'clock.

I'm going to open a home for abused husbands and workaholics.

Jeff...

It's okay.

But I'm 30, and I'm feeling self-indulgent as hell,

and I need to get away. So right after work tomorrow,

I am gone.

Jeff, wait.

[DOOR CLOSES]

GIDGET: Okay,

I just have to find a way to get Jeff home in time for the party.

All I need is a few hours sleep,

then I'll be fresh enough to handle everything.

Jeff!

Jeff!

[EXCLAIMS] Oh, no!

Hey, Gidget, what's the matter? I over slept.

I forgot to tell Jeff to be home.

He's going to miss the whole party.

Good morning! What time is your dad running by?

Oh! Dad's not running this morning.

Maybe tomorrow.

I hope dad's a fast runner.

Come on.

Oh...

[SIGHS]

[SIGHS]

Anne?

Yes?

Hi. This is Gidget. How are you?

Fine. Fine, thanks.

Gidget, are you home?

I sure I am. To stay.

Listen, I have a big favor to ask you.

It's Jeff's birthday today, and...

I know. I got him a fabulous present.

Isn't that nice?

Could I trouble you to ask Jeff to come home right after work today?

I have a semi-fabulous present for him myself.

Of course.

After all, I am still the boss.

You sure are.

Bye.

And I'm still the wife.

Is everything okay?

[SIGHS] You bet. Great. Now what can I do to help?

Oh, honey, you don't have to hang around here today.

It's just gonna be a bunch of old friends.

I want to. Okay.

Is Albert gonna be here? Uh-huh.

Great. I mean he'll need someone to talk to.

Someone closer to his own age.

I think I'm getting the message.

What? [GIGGLES]

Jeff, it's brilliant.

Well, it's pretty damn complete.

I think we should have a glass of wine to celebrate.

Oh, no, thanks. It's a little early for me.

All right.

Fine.

Jeff.

Happy birthday.

[SIGHS]

Promotion. [SIGHS]

You deserve it.

As of now, you are the senior engineer of Bedford Construction.

Anne, I'm, um...

I am very pleased.

Well, show it! Be happy!

Nobody under 40, has ever held that title before.

You're only 32. I'm 30.

Well, whatever.

Are you sure you don't wanna have that drink?

It's Saturday.

Nobody here, but the three of us.

Just you, me and the rest of the day.

[CHUCKLING]

I have to go.

Where?

Well, I was going to go to Rincon, but...

I think I'm going to take a drive-up to Malibu.

Oh.

You've changed.

I thought last night was the beginning for us.

The beginning ended after a few kisses.

[SOMBER INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Don't feel bad.

I promised my first affair to Gidget.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[CHATTERING]

Albert!

Honey, maybe he misunderstood the message.

Eight to five, our Ms. Rodeo Drive never gave him the message.

That woman is not interested in helping anybody but herself.

Probably.

The guy's probably in a bar tying one on.

Turning 30 is no easy deal, Gidge, you know. I know.

SLIM: I think traumatic is a better word.

He's probably at some newsstand, goofing off, reading Architectural Digest.

Remember when he used to do that, guys? Yeah.

He'll be here any minute.

I don't think so. [SIGHS]

Listen. I have a confession to make.

Jeff and I... What's going on here?

What's this? A party or a wake?

[ALL CHEERING]

Scooter Boy!

Oh! Slim, is that you or that's two of you, huh?

How are you, brother? All right.

Malibu Mac. What are you hiding under all that foliage? Hey, man.

What's going on, huh? Everything's great.

Where's the Hot Dog? HOT DOG: Hey, man!

Looking good and young! How you doing? Yeah.

Your hair got a little older. My hair's gotten old. Yes.

Really good, huh? Hey, heart breaker.

Larue, Larue...

Are you still making those kamikaze margaritas, huh?

You bet, sweetie. [CHUCKLES]

Where's the Midget? Where... Where's the Midget?

Anybody seen the Midget?

[ALL LAUGHING]

You're all right? I didn't think you'd make it.

Are you kidding? Miss the Moondoggie's birthday party?

Not a chance. How you doing? Great.

[MOCKS] Great?

You don't look so great.

Where's the birthday boy anyway, huh?

Well, you know how Jeff is. Hi, Russ. How you doing?

He was always missing that outside wave,

and now it looks like he's done the same thing with the party. [CHUCKLES]

What a punk, huh?

Missed his own birthday party. [LAUGHTER]

[PHONE RINGING] Not exactly.

See, I've been missing him, and he's been missing me.

And this is all sort of symptomatic.

I just feel badly that you guys have come all this way for nothing.

Hey, wait a minute.

We should have all gotten together a long time ago.

MEN: That's right. Besides,

we wouldn't miss seeing you for the world, doll.

Thank you. KIM: Hey, Gidget.

Yeah? That was Anne.

She called to apologize for not reminding Uncle Jeff to come home.

She said he was thinking of going to Malibu.

It's worth a try.

If he's not there, you can always come home, you know.

We still have 800 cans of beer here,

Go get your husband.

Yeah, go on.

[ALL CLAMORING CHEERFULLY]

All right! Yes!

[ALL CLAMORING]

I am going!

Poor kid.

Let's party! [ALL EXCLAIMING]

[CHEERFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[SEAGULLS CAWING]

[WAVES CRASHING]

[CAR APPROACHING]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

Happy birthday.

[GASPS] [CHUCKLES]

Hi.

How did you know I was going to be out here?

Anne called.

Thought you were going to Rincon.

I changed my mind.

I needed to come here.

You finished up early?

Jeff.

I didn't work today.

I lied to you, because I arranged

a surprise birthday party for you.

A surprise party? Everybody.

Malibu Mac, Scooter Boy, Slim, The Kahoona...

[EXCLAIMING] The Kahoona? Yup.

Where are they?

The last I knew, they were back at the house.

I've got to get back there. If I miss those guys,

I'm never going to forgive myself.

[SERENE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Wait a minute.

That's why you got home in the middle of the night, is it?

And why you pretended to go to work today?

And why you didn't want to go to Hawaii in the first place.

Paradise isn't paradise without you.

Oh, Gidget.

Jeff, I don't want to lose you.

Take it easy, slugger.

I ain't going any place.

[CROWD CHEERING]

[EXCLAIMS] What?

I left you 12 years ago, and you're still doing the same thing!

I don't believe! Oh, my God!

Hello, brother. How are you?

You look sensational. Well, no responsibilities.

Plus, I got my cousins here.

And a supply of Tahitian turtle oil, which reverses the aging process,

which old Scooter Boy here could use on his head.

Scooter Boy! Yes!

Time warp! No, you're not!

If we were, I'd still have my hair.

Hey, hey. I got my hair.

That's right. What're you going to do?

Hot Dog! Prematurely distinguished.

[ALL WHOOPING]

Slim!

Nobody's called me that since '73.

That sounds terrific!

[ALL CHEERING]

And here, a fine example of your basic lunar canine.

Or better known as Moondoggie, ladies and gentleman.

Malibu Mac, is it really you?

Uh, Dr. McColly, if you please?

[ALL EXCLAIMING PLAYFULLY]

I can't believe that we're all here together.

ALL: Aw!

It feels like we're all back in Boone

waiting for the big one on the outside!

Hey! It's your birthday! What do you wanna do?

I say, "Let's hit it!"

[ALL CHEERING]

Aw.

What a wonderful birthday, Gidget. Happy birthday.

BOY: Looks like the group of some city just arrived.

Let's go.

You people got the wrong beach.

Locals only.

Uh-huh.

Well, we thought you might make an exception today, because it's my birthday.

Oh, happy birthday.

Now take off.

Wait.

You guys got a nice beach here.

No sense fighting over it.

Why don't we, uh, ride for it?

Ride?

Ride? You mean to shootout?

Oh, is that what it's called?

Yeah. Your best guy,

against our best guy.

Winner makes beach rules. What do you say?

[CHUCKLES] It's no contest pal.

But I'm a fair guy, who you got?

Try me.

[KIDS LAUGHING]

You?

[LAUGHS]

You got to be kidding, man.

No, I'm serious.

Let's go.

Come on, bro. Let's go.

[ALL CHATTERING]

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

I got this one, old timer. Try to match me.

I'll do my best, kid.

[UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[KIDS CHEERING]

[GROUP CHEERING]

[KIDS GROAN]

[GROUP CHEERS]

Yeah.

[GROUP CHEERING]

Had enough, kid? Yeah, like hell, man.

You surf real good.

Just work on your attitude a little bit.

[BOTH GROUPS CHEERING]

Come on.

[KIDS GROAN]

Wow! He's the best I've ever seen!

I'd go anywhere to see him surf.

Yes, except perhaps Death Valley. [CHUCKLES]

[WHISTLING]

GIDGET: You are better than ever, Kahoona!

Like wine.

Happy birthday.

Hey, you couldn't have given Jeff a better birthday present, Kahoona!

Hey, you set me up with a Kahoona.

Thank a lot, man.

You're welcome, man.

Duck Jeff.

[ALL CLAMORING]

[GRUNTS]

[GASPS]

[EXCLAIMS]

MAN: See ya! Locals only, man!

[LAUGHTER, WHOOPING]

Have you been giving Albert lessons?

Yeah.

Next to you, he's the best student I've ever had. [EXCLAIMS]

Way to go. Congratulations. Thank you.

Well, the beach is open again, everybody.

It's time to hit it! All right!

Yeah!

Wow. Cowabunga, man!

Cowabunga. Sounds Zulu. It's Malibu.

Means you are sensational.

Come on!

[CHEERFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[LAUGHS]

Come on in! Jeff, Gidge!

Oh. No. We're not really dressed for it.

So what? Cowabunga, man! Whoo!

No. We're all grown up now, Slim.

We're too old for that kind of stuff.

We'll just stand here and wave from time to time.

Mrs. Griffin.

Mr. Griffin.

[BOTH CLEAR THROAT]

Shall we?

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[ALL CHEERING]

That was the best semi-surprise party I've ever had.

You know, everyone looks just great.

The Kahoona, Scooter Boy.

[CHUCKLES] Not bad for old folks, huh? Old?

How do you figure?

We have nine cases of beer left.

We are slowing down. [LAUGHS]

[KNOCKS ON DOOR] Yes?

I've decided I'm in love with Albert.

And now he tells me he's going to Paris for linguistic studies.

If I can't have him, I swear to God, I'll move to South America

for the rest of my life.

[DOOR SHUTS]

Anyway... Yeah.

I spoke to dad today and he says he wants to come work at the agency.

He says he's bored.

That's what he's been trying to tell us all this time.

God bless, Russ. [CHUCKLES]

That means I'm going to have an awful lot of free time.

So, you want to take a vacation?

No.

It feels too good to be home again.

Besides, there aren't any good travel agencies.

Oh, I know. [CHUCKLES]

Well, I guess we could stay home and

surf, jog, skate.

Have children.

Mmm.

Read.

Lots and lots of reading.

[SERENE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[CHUCKLES]

[UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]