Ghinionistul (2017) - full transcript

An unpredictable comedy set in modern-day Romania, Ghinionistul follows a down on his luck protagonist who tries to be in time for an audition but obstacle after obstacle gets in his way.

Hello.

- Hi.
- Hi.

What's she doing? She's not up?

Hey, get up! You've got school.

In the afternoon.

Leave out the phone.
We don't have enough for rent.

We don't have enough, anyway.

With Dad's pension?

There's something else.

He got to the postwoman this morning
and took the money before I could.

There's nothing left?



Half...

I think he drank the other half.

Let me see.

Wait... So...

You've got 300 and...

with what I'll make today...

We've got enough for the rent!

Now, go to school! Scram!

You're gonna get some rest, right?

Have you ever seen a devil sleep?

What are you doing, Mr. Pavel?
Been sleeping here again?

No... I was...

But I remembered something
and I came back.

Come on, go home and get some rest
'cause you're tired. Come on!



I'm going, the girls
are leaving for school.

Denisa! Your phone.

Thanks! Bye!

Did you give her something to eat?

- Or did you send her hungry to...
- Yes!

...to school?

What's up, neighbor? What you lookin' for?

- I lost something.
- Wow! Maybe it's the rent money!

Mrs. Zizi,
I swear I'll bring the money today.

Dear, please don't swear.

I understand your situation
so, please, understand mine.

I've got a new tenant coming today,
who wants to move in your place.

So, please tell me by five o'clock
if you're staying or not.

Yes...

The man wants to know
if he can bring his baggage.

Yes, I will! I promise by five o'clock
I'll be here with the money.

It's the 15th today and I'll get some
money. I swear I'll be here with it.

Whatever you say! I've informed you.

If you're not here by five with the money,

I'm sorry, I'll throw your stuff out.

Easy there, Rocky. Take it easy.

Go and get the rubbing alcohol.

I told you! By five, you're here
with the money. Or you're out!

- Hello!
- Howdy, Robert!

Hello!

How are you, Madam Nuti?

Fine!

See you at the inspection.

Here! This one you take now
and the red one for this evening. OK?

Will you remember or should I call you?

Of course I'll remember.

I'll give you a call to remind you.

Are you coming? I'm at the pier.

OK, I'll wait here.

Mr. Tony, it's done.
I've got her bananas, I gave her pills.

Well done!

Well... I'm leaving now.

Bye!

Today is the 15th,
you know that, don't you?

What am I, a calendar?

Give me the money.

- What, today is the 15th?
- Yes.

Fantastic!

Come on, Mr. Tony! Really, I need it!
I wouldn't have come if it wasn't urgent.

- I need to pay the rent.
- Hey, son, what's got into you all today?

Where can I get the money?

Where can I get you your money?

Now get lost. Go!

- At least give me the money for bananas!
- What bananas?

- I've bought her bananas with my money!
- What bananas?

- She ate bananas!
- God bless, thank you very much!

- God bless?
- God bless! Listen, boy...

If she asked you for a limo,

for a convertible car,
would you have done it?

- Really?
- Get lost!

Looky here...

A shot... What do you think
is a shot for me?

You're saying I'm stealing from you?

No, man.

I'm not saying you're stealing.

I'm just saying you're human, too.

You can make errors.

Really?

Am I a fool for selling on credit?

Get out.

What's up, teacher?

Problems?

- No!
- Listen to this one!

You know something? Get out, both!

Listen here, nobody.
Why are you talking to me like that?

What would your daddy say
to hear you talk like that?

He'd say to get your friend
and get the hell out.

I'd argue that.

You can argue as much as you want,
but I'm not serving you on credit.

Who said anything about credit?

That's the trouble. Nobody said anything
about their debts for a month.

Let's do a check.

Let's.

Good.

We've got...

Two hundred first...

add another two...

add another four...

add another six...

and two bottles...

- And another hundred.
- A hundred?

I couldn't do it.

OK.

Here you go.

One hundred, two, three...

Well, that's only your part.

And the teacher's part?

One hundred...

two hundred.

I'll write you down in my notebook.

- Good.
- Are we square?

- We are.
- Give me 200ml brandy.

- Fourteen lei!
- Write me down.

- Do you have something against me?
- Absolutely nothing. You?

I know you don't care about me,
but what about the girls?

We'll talk later, if you insist.

Ninu, please give me the money!
I'm begging you!

I need it, I have to pay the rent
or me and the girls will be on the street!

Please, understand!

I don't like the way
you talk to your daddy.

Ninu, please, I'm begging you!
Give me the money!

I'll give it back someday!

I don't want to hear it! It's unheard of.

How can you talk to your daddy like that?

Man, please! I need the money!

- I'll get it back later!
- I'm not having it.

I'm not even having it.

With us, it's unheard of.

You owe me!

Put it down, 'cause I...

made him angry.

- And this one?
- It's not my business.

It's on me for my Dad...

- So, I put this finger...
- Yes, here.

Yes, here, in this tab.
And this one, here.

- Yes.
- Try now.

- Wow, I'm a big guitar player!
- Wait, Miruna.

Once again. You touch
only with these two fingers, OK?

- Yes.
- Only these two and not the others.

And now, try...

I brought the coffee.

- How's it going, Miruna?
- Fine.

How much longer?

We're kinda done.

Miruna, go do your homework.

I did it!

Then go play with Miti in the yard.
Come on!

I'm not in the mood!

Miruna...

She's so bad!

- What did you say?
- Nothing.

Sugar?

No, thank you. I'll leave.

Are you upset?

Yes, I kinda am.

Why?

I need some money. Fast.

How much?

Plenty.

About 1,000 lei.

About 1,000 or 1,000?

Whatever you can.
I'll give it back the next week.

Yes...

Here you go.

I promise to give it back.

You don't have to.

What the fuck are you doing?

We're smoking!

- What the fuck are you doing at home?
- Smoking?

- Get your hands... Get your hands off me!
- Smoking?

- Smoking?
- Get your hands off...

Wait, I'll kill you!

Motherfucker!

Look at the price of the euro, man!

- What's up, man? You got home?
- Fuck you!

Give me some clothes!

- What the fuck happened?
- She kicked us out.

Check this out!
I've got a haircut like Cristiano Ronaldo.

Only it's the other way.

Yo! You want in on a deal?

No, I don't.

Yo!

You'll get a thousand.

What do you want me to do?

Drive.

Money up front.

Hey, motherfucker,
since when are you a wise-ass?

Since I've got nothing to lose.

You said a thousand.

Is the job done?

OK. Five minutes and I'm back.

What if he doesn't return in five minutes?

He'll be back.

Watch it with...

Get the door for me...

Hey, sonny!

Wait up.

So, did you see it?

Did I see what?

That I'm not playing.

If you're not... you're not playing.

Please, be here with the rest
of the money by 11 o'clock. Otherwise...

- Out with you all!
- Yes, relax. I'll be back with the money.

Rocky, come on. Abort mission.

What are you guys doing?
Where are you taking these clothes?

Why are you so upset?

- All the motherfuckers die...
- Speedy!

At least, sing something else.

Oh, how I miss your eyes...

- Your eyes...
- Speedy!

Hold her tight, man!

Legs, first! Get the legs.

Go, man!

- Go, man!
- Go!

Come on! Go, man! Come on!

Come on, man, go!

Come on! Get behind the wheel!

Move over!

- Move!
- Come on, go!

Am I a fool? We got away, yo!

What the fuck did you get me into?
Are you idiots?

I'll tell you, after I take a leak.

He'll tell you, after he takes a leak.

After...

All the motherfuckers die...

What are you doing?

Throw a rock!

Calm down!

Relax, I'm not with them!
I'm on your side!

I'll take you to the police
and you'll sort everything out.

Calm down! Why are you so nervous?

Are you fucking crazy?

What the fuck is wrong with you?
Cut it! Are you crazy?

Are you crazy? Want to get us killed?

Tell me! What if I hit a tree?
And we both died...

Stop it!

Really! Calm down!

Don't you understand... Stop! Calm down!

Calm down!

I said calm down. I won't hurt you.

- Stop it!
- Hey, what are you doing?

Come on, people! You had
to fuck on my seedling?

Good evening!

Sorry... we were...
Sorry, it was a mistake!

Come on, scram! No excuses.

Stop!

Fuck! Stop! I told you, I won't hurt you!

I didn't know! I'm not with them!
Got it? They paid me to be a driver.

But I didn't know it involved
a kidnapping! I won't hurt you, OK?

I'll get the tape off...
Please, don't scream.

After that you'll go to the police
and sort things out.

Are you a fuckin' moron?

What?

Are you a moron? Get off me!

Get off!

Really?

Really! You thought that's what
I wanted to do? Really?!

I save you and...

Take me this instant to Speedy and Nero.

- You know them?
- Yes!

I hired them to kidnap me.

You hired them to do what?

Kidnap me, didn't you hear?

Close the door!

If I kick your ass inside, I cool off
faster and I'll beat you less.

If I do it outside,
I don't know when I'll finish.

So, what'll it be?

Outside, but please let the girls go.

You fuckin' son of a bitch!
You've got some nerve!

Yours are well. Where's mine?

In the car.

OK, leave!

- Get the fuck lost!
- Come on, girls. Go!

- Get lost!
- Move, girls.

Move!

Come on, go! Go home, go!

Come on!

Come on, man!

- Motherfucker...
- Hey, what are you doing?

- My Dad's on the phone! Talk to him!
- Here!

And put some effort into it!

...just a pinch, you're dead!

Come on, get out of here!

Hello? Hi...

Sorry for waking you up,
but I woke you up because I had to.

- Scream!
- Daddy, don't leave me! Come get me!

Like you just heard, she's safe
and unharmed, but not for long.

That is, if you cooperate.

- Collaborate.
- Collaborate, yes... Collaborate.

OK, fine. How much?

Well, we were thinking of 50,000.

- Euros... 50,000 euros.
- Not a cent more.

Fifty thousand euros...
So, how do you want to do it?

Well, it's very simple.
You take the 50,000 euros,

you put it in a bag, you tie it well,

and you leave it by the mulberry tree,
near the ferry across the Danube.

- And, after you leave, on the way...
- Say...

I have a much simpler solution.

Don't you want it now?

- No.
- You're making her nervous.

- Well, what can I say?
- It's no use.

How many self-kidnappings now? Six...

- Forty-six?
- Leave me alone.

Wouldn't it have been easier to call?

To call? But you're very busy.

I can't get past your assistants.

For whom...

do you think I'm so busy?

I mean, everything you see around me
is mine, right? To take to the grave?

For you, daddy's girl, I'm busy.

So your ass can travel around the world.
So you can have everything.

- So you can buy anything...
- She's your daughter! Not your mistress!

What did he say?

That she's your daughter...

not your mistress.

Get in the car.

- Come on, get in the car.
- No! I'm staying here.

Let's leave...

Can we leave?

Excuse me!

How old is your daughter?

Twelve.

- Twelve...
- Yes.

Time passes.

It does.

What do we have to do tomorrow?

We gotta go to Timisoara, to Moldova Noua,

and Oravita, to meet the Italians.

I wish they'd leave me alone.

What's this?

Take your daughter...

to a fine place.

Hey, what's up?

- Why the hard knocking?
- I wanted to thank you.

Thank you!

You're welcome.

Hey, neighbor!

It's 11 o'clock, neighbor!
What about the money?

Fuckin' shit!

Madam Zizi...

Madam Zizi, please...

My sister is sleeping, don't yell.
I'll bring the money, please. I will.

Please, get your stuff together and leave!

- Leave!
- Please.

Leave!

What the fuck? Stop it!

Get out, I've had it with you.

- How much do you need?
- Five hundred.

Here!

Here you go!

- Are you kidding?
- No.

Thank you.

I feel so bad. I'll give it back.

I don't know when or how,
but I'll give it back. I promise.

Madam Zizi!

Madam Zizi!

Madam Zizi!

What the fuck are you doing
at my window, at this hour?

I brought you the money.

Have a good night, neighbor! Sweet dreams!

Check this out!

Anyway,
I'm sorry I got you into this mess.

It's not your fault.

- I'm in a mess myself.
- What do you mean?

You know people... that character
from the cartoons

that walks with a cloud above his head?

And wherever he goes,
that cloud follows him

and rains on him,
thunders on him, strikes him?

That's me.

No, really. That's me.

At least you haven't lost
your sense of humor.

Hold on.

Dad, what are you doing?

I'm going fishing.

Really... Are you crazy? Fishing...

We're waist deep in debts
and you're going fishing?

It's pike time. What can I do?

It's a limited time.

- Where did you get the money?
- I got them.

And something else...

Take care of yourselves.

OK, let's go.

Look! Look at that sky. Look...

At least yours gets to see you.

Yeah, he sees me... double.

Double, but he sees me.

I'm a bit hungry.

You're hungry?

Wanna go get something to eat?

There's no place to eat.
They close everything at nine here.

Only...

Come with me. Give me your hand! Come on!

Hey, give me the blouse.

What are you doing?

- You knew it was broken, right?
- Yeah, I knew.

But I didn't break it.

I use it from time to time.

How, in God's name, was this?

Are you testing them?

I have to close this.

Well, at least like that.

What's this place?

A pub.

Please wait here for a bit.

No! Please! Please, no! It's a surprise!

Go ahead, I'll be behind you.

- OK?
- Fine!

Don't look!

Please, don't look!

Sit on the chair...

What's this?

- I think it's a mic.
- Isn't it too small to be a mic?

It's the smallest mic.

But he'll grow big.

It doesn't stay small.

We water it and it grows big.

And with this small, small mic...

do we have some music?

- No.
- No.

Wait a second.

And you...

don't have rent money?

And you play like that?

Well, why don't you play in a band
or an orchestra? I don't know...

Jazz... There's the Garana festival.

I don't know... Didn't get any offers?

I did. But I'm not interested.

Why?

I like...

the acoustic guitar.

Classical.

It's different...

I feel it different.

OK, but...

Classical guitar, here...

Yes, I know.

So you prefer kidnapping people
so Zizi doesn't kick you out?

I didn't kidnap anyone.

- I didn't kidnap anyone.
- No.

No, someone else came by herself.

Why so much struggle?

My moment will come.

It's coming, I feel it.

G major, please.

Hey, neighbor!

- Yes?
- I want to ask you something.

- What?
- Would you...

Play some of your music
and turn it up really loud?

- Play what?
- Music.

That fine music of yours.

Why?

I'm starting to like it.
Don't know? Haven't I told you?

- Really.
- Get the hell out of here!

I play the music and you call the police?

Really, now! I won't call the police,
neighbor. What's wrong with you?

Play some of that music
and turn it up. Really!

I like it! Your last disc
was amazing! Really!

- Really?
- Really!

Come on! But hurry! OK?

- Wait just a sec.
- OK, I believe you.

- But turn it up loud, yes?
- Check it out!

Oh, couldn't the day start better?

Was it too much to ask for birds singing?

The world would have ended
if it was birds.

- I'll go...
- Please do.

Leave him alone!

I made him do it.

Why?

Why? Because that agent
keeps on ringing you.

She texted you a lot.

You have to go now to Soho,
because she wants to talk to you.

What Soho?

- Soho, that bar downtown.
- Is that the name now?

Didn't you know?

- You've started going in bars?
- Of course.

Well done, sister!
I was kidding.

Yo!

What are you doing?

- Morning!
- Morning!

Sorry, I have to go to Resita.

There's an agent there
that's been bugging me to meet her.

Can I come with you?

Come on.

But put some clothes on.

- Hey! Hello!
- Hello!

- Hi.
- Hello!

Sorry! Claudia, Sonia.

His girlfriend. Nice to meet you.

His girlfriend...

Got plans for tonight?

- Sorry?
- More precisely, four o'clock.

I don't know what I'll be doing later,
more precisely at four.

Have you heard of Heidelberg?

Charles, of course.
He's my favorite guitar player.

Lately, he's also an agent.

He's on his way to Moscow now.

He's assembling a quartet.

And I got him to stop over at Timisoara.

I sent a car for him and by four o'clock
he'll be at Dacia Cinema.

To see you.

- Are you joking or what...
- Does it look like I'm joking?

- You want me to say that again?
- No.

This time, I hope you're coming!

Yes, I am. I'll be there.
At four I'll be at Dacia.

Good. Perfect.

Well, go and get ready.

Yes, I'm going.

- You know you're still in the chair?
- Yes, but I was going.

- Hey, thank you very, very much.
- Hello! Can I get you anything?

Yes, a new guitar.

I'm sorry, but we don't have that here.

- Come on! We'll be back.
- Thank you!

You know what we'll do?

We'll go buy you a suit.

No! We'll go buy you a tuxedo.

What do you say?

Sonia, he's coming to listen to me,
not to see me.

Come on, I know what I'm saying.
The way you look is important to him.

You'll see. It matters.

- Shit!
- What?

My Dad closed my card!

He's incredible in his revenge!

You know what?

I'll go home and make up with him
and I'll see you at your place.

OK.

- Robert!
- Yes?

Come here a bit, 'cause I've got
something we need to talk about.

Sure, Ninu.

- Little Robert...
- Little Robert?

I've got something to tell you.

It's about your Dad.

He's in the hospital, in Anina.

It's bad.

He died.

Now... If you want to go see him...

I say it's the proper thing.

But you do it your way.

Please give me some money.

I'll return it when I come back.

Yes...

Let me see how much I've got on me. Wait.

One million eight hundred here.

One eight hundred, yes?

Do the girls know?

No. I haven't told them.

Please don't tell them.

I'll tell them.

Hey, Robert!

You know, he's got some debt.

But, you'll pay it. Yes? Forget it.

God rest his soul.

- Hello!
- No!

- I'm looking for...
- I'm not the person to talk to.

Hello!

Just a second, please.

Mariana! Come with me,
we've got work in ward five.

- Hello, there!
- Hello!

It's a bit complicated these days,
'cause...

She does her on-call time, then she runs.

It's a celebration around...

Her sister gave birth

and we're all happy. I mean, it's...

She put in a lot of effort. She lost three
pregnancies. She's been to Bucharest...

And now she did it, finally, and...
Of course it's a little commotion.

The baby weighed 8.3 pounds.

The doctors gave it a ten.

If there's something I can do for you...

- I'm here to take my Dad home.
- What ward?

I don't think he's in a ward, he died.

The drunk?

Well, yes... He's the only dead.

I know. I can take you.

- Please.
- Yes?

Well, this way.

We, we're doing very well... Look out!

We're doing very well in that matter.
I mean, we have no dead people.

Now, he came here, he ruined
our statistics. But, it's OK.

Good thing we could help. Come!

Just a second.

Here you go.

This way.

Is this him?

Yes.

It's very hot in here.

Why didn't you keep him somewhere else?

Well, no... I don't think it is..
You don't have to worry.

The amount of alcohol in his blood,
he can sit in the sun.

It's not... I think...

he looks very well. He's fresh!

That's what I think... But...

He needs a suit, something,
to look more like a person.

I don't know, whatever you think.

I know, but I'm short on money.

- How much do you have?
- One million eight hundred.

Well, that's it.
Whatever you want... I mean...

But...

Is there an ambulance,
something, to carry him home?

- Where do you need to take him?
- To Garana.

Jesus... Where is that?

- Near Resita.
- That's near.

Yes, we can do that. I'll take care of it.

Here, this is...

His stuff... Whatever's left of it...

- And about the paper, where...
- I'll take care of everything.

I mean, from this moment, you don't have
to do anything. I'll take care of it.

You don't have to be here, you know.

I mean, we have to...

We've got very tight rules
in our hospital.

Hygiene rules, other rules...

You can clearly see... In our hospital...

Hello! Mugurel, where are you, man?

What wedding, man?

Jesus! Hey, man... Listen to this,
I've got something, man.

Can you get out of there?

Yes, you have to bring the car...

Yes, there's money involved.
Are you crazy?

Yes. I've got a man that came for his
dead father. He needs to get him out.

Come on, I'm not telling you everything
on the phone. Can you come?

Of course he's paying.
He's got money, man. No...

He gave Viorica...

Viorica said "Hello!"
and he gave her 100 lei.

The man is... He's loaded.

Come on... He's Becali's nephew,
listen to me. He's not...

OK! Come here! Are you coming?
OK, good... Come on.

OK, I'll wait for you. Bye.

I'm sorry.

No, I won't say anything.
I wouldn't tell them, anyway.

You have to...

- Something wrong?
- No.

- Nothing.
- Are you sure?

I know that...

I know you can't think
about this now, but...

I think you should
make it to the audition.

I'm not in the mood for auditions.

Sonia, there'll be more auditions.

I have to get Dad home.

I'm sorry for saying this... Forgive me...

But I think you have time to get your Dad
home and to get to the audition.

Sonia, we'll talk later.

My respects!

Wishes of health and condolences!

Look out!

Move out of the way! That's it!

That's it! Move out of the way!

Come on, man, you don't plan
on sending me in a wedding car!

Come on, sir! What is this, a joke?

I won't leave it like this.
There's a God above watching us!

I'll... take care of it right away...

That's it... Check this out!

No, 'cause you have to start
believing in this stuff at a certain age.

Come on, man, get the dead inside.
I want to get back to the wedding.

Come on! Come here. Come and help me.

Is everything all right?
I say he looks pretty decent.

- Come on, help me.
- Wait! That's it!

Man, bring me my sheet back,
'cause I took it from the doctor's room!

Relax, man, I'm not leaving the country.

Yes, I said I'll go wash it.

What the hell is that crate there?
Is that the hope chest?

No, man, it's my toolbox.
I need it on the road.

Yes, but, don't you see
the stretcher doesn't fit?

Excuse me, but, didn't we talk
about an ambulance?

Well, what do you need an ambulance for?

That fuckin' toolbox! Fuck it!

I'll find the spot. Just wait!

- Give it to me.
- Pull that one. That's it!

Stop, stop! That's it! Put him
in position. That's good.

That's it. No, it's good.
Leave it, leave it there.

That's it!

Everything's OK!

One thing I noticed.

The boots don't match the suit.

We'd better take them off.

Or I can hold on to them...

I was thinking like a charity.
It's good for the dead.

I mean, I'll take them and wear them.
I'll take them fishing.

I'll water the garden... I'll...
The dead will be happy...

- Yes, you can have them.
- I can?

That's good.

Come on, man. Wait.
Move out. I gotta get them!

Fuckin' piece of shit toolbox!

- Wait, man...
- Come on, man, you're pissing me off!

- Wait!
- The man said to get the boots...

Wait. I'll pull it.

- That's it.
- Easy!

I'll get them gently.

Done!

We're OK. It's good.

Done, it's fixed.

Well, have a safe journey.

Wishes of health!

Do you mind?

No.

You know, I'm a big Steaua fan.

My daughter, too. She watches all
the games with me. What if she's a girl?

She knows all the teams by heart.

And she's very beautiful.

Not that I'm saying, everybody says it.

My mother, my cousin and...

Don't you think she's beautiful?

- Who...
- No.

Here.

- Yes, she's beautiful.
- Thanks, you're kind.

You know who her favorite player is?

Who is her favorite player?

Adi Popa.

The Moped.

Listen...

I'll be straight with you.

If you can get Adi Popa's autograph
for my daughter,

I'll only ask you for 300 lei.

I won't even ask for gas money.

What money?

The transport money.

Wait a second... I don't have money.

Not now... When we get there.

I don't have any money. Not now,
not when we get there. I don't.

Come on, man, Gigi Becali's nephew
doesn't have money?

Whose nephew?

Gigi's nephew!

Becali?

Gigi Becali's nephew?

Wait, we'll sort it out now... Just wait.

Wait, we'll sort it out right now.
Wait just a sec.

We'll sort it out.

Wait.

Yes, Mugurel.

Hey, Mister Petrica...

Hey, I don't know what's in it for you,
but you've done it again.

What did I do?

Good for you! May you
rot in hell for this scam!

- What happened?
- Man, are you playing me like kids?

You tell me he's the son
of Gigi Becali, his nephew...

and he's a loser that doesn't
even have money for water?

Hey...

Hey, Mr. Petrica, he can be
Carla's Drinks, you got it?

He's gotta pay.

Yes, man... Go get him.
Talk to him, he'll pay.

Yes? OK, hold one second.

Say, go get some water, at least.
For the windshield.

Come on.

Lamb faced motherfucker!
You're foolin' me?

Hey, hey, no! Wait, wait!

Stop, you motherfucker...

Hey! Hey...

Stop! Hey... you motherfucker...

Leave me, the fuck alone!
I can't stand you anymore!

- What's wrong with you? Are you crazy?
- Yes, I am! I've gone crazy!

What's wrong with you? What?
Fooling that woman?

Yes, Sonia.

This is how I react! From now on!

And are you jealous now, or what?

Yes, I'm jealous! Like I have
a reason to be jealous.

- Then why this scandal?
- Yes, I'm making a scandal!

- I'm making a scandal!
- Since when do you act like this?

- From now on this is how I react!
- From when?

From now!

Stupid motherfucker!

Leave me the fuck alone!

Get lost!

I should have listened to my mother.

Yes.

Mommy...

Mommy...

Say, mister, are you having a good time?

Need help?

Check this one out!

What the fuck are you doing?

Are you hitting on my wife, motherfucker?

You fuckin' whore!

No, no... Sonia, please,
don't mess in this affair with Dad.

It's my business.

Mister...

Hello!

Come on, get up now!

- Hey, come get him up!
- Come on, get up. I didn't hurt you.

What? I slapped him.

- What...
- Wasted!

Come on, get up!

Get up, man!

Hey, I hit him once... but I killed him.

No, he's not dead. He's drunk.

What do we do know?

Move, bitch...

What the fuck do we do now?

Come on, please!

Yes, I'm on the train.
I'll come... as fast as I can.

No, we'll sort it out.

I'll call you... Yes, I'll call you and...

Excuse me...

- Yes.
- Where's my Dad?

Who?

My father... The man that was here.

He got off.

How did he get off...

Robert...

Hey, son...
wasn't I supposed to be fishing?

- You're confused.
- What's going on there?

- Dad is alive...
- What?

Well, yes... How should I be?

You know what? I'll go there
and try to keep him busy

and you do your best to come as fast
as you can to Resita. Yes?

OK. Yes, OK, OK. Bye.

Hey, son!

Hey, stop! Are you crazy? It hurts!

Hey, where are you going?

- Excuse me... Hello!
- Hello!

- When's the first train to Resita?
- In five hours.

- So, did you cry?
- Do you think I cried?

Did the girls cry?

- They didn't get the chance.
- Better.

Perhaps Ninu is the only one
who was happy.

I won't ask about the teacher.

Anyway, I have his notebook.

You'll laugh, but the teacher did cry.

- That's good.
- Nu, he cried for the notebook.

Maybe he'll take us.

I'm not taking this one. No.

- I'm not getting in a hearse.
- Come on, man, I'm in a hurry!

- I've got to get to Resita.
- No, man. Believe me.

I'm not getting in a hearse!

I've just got past that difficult moment!

Consider it a sign.

- To Resita, yes?
- Yes. Get in.

That's great! Thank you.

It's sinister, Robert!

Hey, Robert...

I don't have my boots.
Where are my boots?

On the other side.
St. Peter will give them to you.

You're funny...

Like father, like son.

- But I am, too.
- Yes you are.

Jesus! Police.

Fucking piece of shit!
There he goes, he's stopping me.

Listen...

I've got an idea.

Get in the coffin.

- It's the only you've got?
- Yes.

Hey, tell your father that,
if he doesn't get in the coffin,

you both get out. Got it?

- Get in the coffin. Please!
- I'm not, man.

Please. Just for a minute,
until we get rid of him.

- My respects.
- Hello!

I know! I did something wrong.

Yes, I went over the speed limit.

Here, in the bend, it's 40,
I've been on this road for 30 years.

But please believe me

I wouldn't be rushing if I didn't have
a problem. Come, let me show you.

I have a dead guy in my car.

He's been dead for four days.

I took him from Anina
and I'm taking him to Resita. His son.

That's not why I've stopped you.

I want you to take my colleague to Resita.

- You do?
- Could you?

- Yes. But where is he?
- In the car, I'll get him.

Sorin...

Come on!

Come on, move faster!

Come, I've found you a car.

I've sorted it with the boys.
You're going with them.

They'll take you to Resita,
to the valley of Doman.

In a hearse?

- You're not scared, are you?
- I'm not scared.

How could I be scared?
I'm not scared, but...

- It's a hearse, man...
- In, you go.

Hello!

Have a seat...

Good bye!

DACIA CINEMA

- Do you want a coffee?
- Yes, please. With milk.

- Hello.
- Hello!

- Looking for someone?
- Yes, I'm here for the audition.

Well, the audition was for a man,
as far as I know.

I know, for Robert.
I brought him his guitar.

- OK. That way.
- Thank you.

It's like that with dead people...

Some sneeze, some cough...

Some of them whistle, yes...

Yes...

Come on, step on it, you're with me...

- Is the sound good here?
- Yes.

Shall we sit here?

Boys, I'm sorry, I can't do it...
I can't lay here anymore!

I can't hold my breath anymore!

I'm suffocating!

And it's too tight.

I've come back from the dead.

I'm a miracle.

Pull over... Pull over!

Pull the car over right now!

You're all under arrest. Nobody move!

Mates...

First sergeant Sorin Savu
to all units nearby...

Wait just a second, sir...

I've identified a suspect car
with the license number...

CS-06-VHS...

- VHO!
- What...

- VHO!
- Sorry, mates... VHO!

Send somebody... Nobody move, I said!

- Do you have a gun?
- No!

Then leave me alone...

Yes, Sonia.

- What Sonia, man? It's Ninu?
- Hello, Ninu!

- The hospital called me!
- Yes...

There's been a mix-up...

Your Dad, Pavel Ion, who was,
actually, in an alcoholic coma...

was mistaken for a Ion Pavel,
who was dead as a doornail.

The thing is you have
to take him back urgently.

- I can't.
- Well, I've told you... Now...

I can't... I'll do it the following day.

You know something?
You do as you please.

- I've told you, I've done my part. OK.
- Yes, OK.

- Yes, fine.
- Thanks.

- OK, bye.
- Bye.

I want a chance, too.

Sonia, you're not helping.

I don't want to help. I want a chance.

This is not a public audition.

Charles, has come to listen to Robert.

I know, I got that.

He comes in our country,
we treat him like a king,

we bring him with the best car from
the airport, we give him the best food...

We welcome him like we know him,
with open arms. So...

I think the man could, at least,
offer me a chance.

It's not me who you have to convince.

And if you spoke for him until now,
he didn't understand a thing. He's French.

Delighted!

Sonia.

Delighted. Charles.

What's going on?

Sonia is the lover of the man
you have come to see.

She wants to sing, too.

Thank you!

Come on, boys!

I know another one.

Could you translate, please, Claudia?

She wants to sing another one.

Stop!

That's good, you don't have to continue.
We'll hire her.

As an assistant. It's well paid.

You don't see too often someone
doing that effort for another person.

So, I want her on my team.
You can sign her.

- What did he say?
- He said he has to leave.

- He's got a plane.
- Is that what he said?

Not now, earlier.

Please, go call Robert and see
if he's coming.

I can't hold him any longer,
ten minutes tops.

- Yes, Sonia.
- Robert, where the hell are you?

On my way.

- What, are you coming with the hearse?
- How'd you guess?

- Come on. I'm not kidding!
- Me neither.

The police have stopped us, for neither
more nor less, drug possession.

What?

- Find anything?
- Nothing.

What made you think
there are drugs in the car?

Why lie about a dead man in the car
if there wasn't anything suspect?

And you make requests
on the basis of a suspicion?

Well, why not?

That's it, boys! We're going home.

But let's not forget to thank
the colleague that made us work today.

It's OK, you can lower your hand.

Thanks, mates!

I'm leaving to the airport right away. OK?

Goodbye!

Damn it! Just a minute.

I'm really sorry for your friend.

Maybe we can leave it for another time.

Another time, like never?

- Have a safe trip! I'm sorry.
- Forgive me! I'm sorry, too.

- I'll call you, right?
- Yes!

- Bye.
- Bye!

Thanks, Gabi.

Do you speak French?

Yes!

And what good is that?

Hey, boy!

The one in socks is your Dad?

Yes!

Come on, both of you get in the car.
Come on, fast!

Hey! Yo!

I'm not sure you noticed,
but I didn't get in the car.