Garfield's Thanksgiving (1989) - full transcript

♪ ♪

Morning, Jon. Sorry to disturb you.

I know you have a busy social calendar,

but if you will be so kind as to go to the

kitchen and fix me a huge breakfast,

I will allow you to come back
to bed and finish your sleep.

Rise and shine, Jon Arbuckle.

It's time to serve your nation
and serve your fellow man.

Yes, it's time to serve 'em pancakes.

Pancakes the size of Australia.

And coffee. Yes, Jon, coffee.



We wouldn't be the great nation

we are today if it weren't for coffee.

So do your patriotic duty,

Jon Arbuckle, and fix me breakfast.

I wonder if people with goldfish have this problem.

I trust breakfast met with your satisfaction.

It was filling.

But about those pancakes, ooh,

next time a little less pan,
a little more cake, okay?

Well, stomach, ahh.

Guess it's time for our
early mid-morning nap.

[ barks and whines ]

Check that.

It's time to abuse the dog.



Kids, don't try this at home.

Hello, what's this?

Take Garfield to vets today.

Oh no! Not the vet!

Jon can't take me to the vet!

That's inhumane.

That vet thinks she knows
what's good for me.

Good for her, but that's bad for me,

because what's bad is good for me,

but if I go to the vet and that's bad,

she'll prescribe what's good for me

and that's not good.

Maybe if the date disappeared,

Jon'll forget about his little note.

Here, Odie, Wednesdays are good
and good for ya.

[ snare drum ]
ODIE: [ whines ] Oh no.

Hello, what's this?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

Do you see that Odie?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

That's the day people celebrate having
food by eating as much of it as possible.

Yes, that's the day people
try to eat every turkey,

pumpkin and cranberry
on the face of the earth.

It's a tradition.

And you know how I love tradition.

Oh, Jon?

Nice calendar.

Thanksgiving! Food! Eat! Tradition!

Yes, I know. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

Which reminds me, we had better go to the

grocery store to get lots of good things to eat.

I'm with you.

♪ Do the mashed potato ♪

♪ Do the candied yam ♪

♪ Do the funky turkey ♪

♪ 'Cause it's time to jam ♪

♪ If you don’t want to dance ♪

♪ Baby, that's alright ♪

♪ Do some non-stop shoppin' ♪

♪ To work up an appetite ♪

♪ Make your Thanksgivin' one long meal ♪

♪ 'Cause the more you eat ♪

♪ The more grateful ♪

♪ You are gonna feel ♪

♪ ♪

Now this is what Thanksgiving is all about.

Thanksgiving is cookies.

Thanksgiving is pie filling.

Thanksgiving is cole slaw!

Drive carefully Jon,

don't wanna bruise my kumquats.

Wait a minute... Where are we going Jon?

This, this isn't the way home.

We're going to the vet, Garfield.

GARFIELD: Ahhh! Nooo!
[ car swerving and crashing ]

[ upbeat synth music ]

Now just relax.

You want me to relax, take me to Hawaii.

I'm only bringing you to the vet for a checkup.

Check out Jon, you're only bringing
me here to check out the vet.

Why don't you marry her?

Then, she could make house calls.

Next!

- Hi Liz, how have you been?
- That's Doctor Wilson to you.

Put the cat here.

[ whistling nervously ]

So, Liz.

That's Doctor to you.

So, Doctor Liz.

How about that weather?

That's a rather personal

question, don't you think,

Mr. Arbuckle?

I can see this relationship

is off to a roaring stop.

- How about a date?
- I'd sooner die.

- Well, don't do that.
- Mr. Arbuckle, please.

You can call me, Jon.

I can call out for pizza, too,

but I'm not gonna call you that.

- Call me what?
- Jon.

Ah, made you say it, made you say it.

[ laughs nervously ]

Don't blame Jon.

Snappy repartee does not
come easily to a dip.

Okay, I'm giving you one last chance, Liz.

- Doctor.
- Doctor!

Uh, will you go out with me?

No!

Okay, uh, one more chance.

- Never!
- Okay.

I can take a hint.

I'll just stand here, quietly.

I'll just stand here and hold my breath

until you say you'll go out with me.

[ inhales deeply ]

Oh, that'll impress her.

Well, Mr. Arbuckle, I've examined your cat.

I have some good news and some bad news.

I hate this part.

The good news is your cat is healthy as a horse.

Hear that, Jon?

The woman is a great physician, a specialist.

The bad news is he's also big as a horse.

You'll have to go on a diet.

Quack! She's a quack! Get me outta here!

DR LIZ: I'm gonna put your cat on
GARFIELD: This can't be happening to me!

- a low carbohydrate, low fat diet.
- I won't do it! Low fat?!

- He must avoid sugar and starches and it
- Fat is some of my best... Sugar?!

DR LIZ: wouldn't hurt him to get a little exercise.
GARFIELD: And starch?! Without them, I'll be lonely

DR LIZ: And, feed him a lot of high fiber foods.
Exercise is for hamsters and fiber's for sweaters!

DR LIZ: And, plenty of water.
GARFIELD: Water's in the bird bath!

DR LIZ: Mr. Arbuckle, cats needs a quality of life.
GARFIELD: Quality? Talk to me about quality.

DR LIZ: If you love your pet, you'll take good care
Without food there's no life as we know it.

of him, and he'll be around
for a long, long time.

Ahhhhh!
[ cymbal crash ]

Okay!

I'll go out with you.

Really?

I can't stand to see a dumb animal suffer.

Great. Ah, uh, tomorrow. My place.

I'll fix a big Thanksgiving dinner.

You're gonna love it.

Well, at least we won't be seen in public together.

And then, this weekend...

Don't push it, buster.

Okay.

Mr. Arbuckle!

Yes?

You forgot your cat.

My cat. Ooh, my cat

A date with my dream chick,

gonna impress her and make her my girl.

Oh, woe is me.

I'm being put on a diet and I'm gonna die.

Here Garfield, have some food.

According to your diet, you get this.

That's it.

That's all, just one scraggly piece of lettuce.

Oh, I'm sorry Garfield.

That's not what you get.

Well, I should hope not.

You get half a leaf of lettuce.

That's better.

Gee, I've been on this diet
only ten minutes and

I can tell I've already lost something...

my sense of humor.

[ upbeat rock music ]

♪ ♪

[ whistle blowing ]

Ah ha! Caught you.

Yeah, well, what did you do?

Booby trap the refrigerator or somethin'?

Garfield, I'd like you to meet

my new diet monitor, Odie the Fierce.

[ growl marching ]

Grrrrr, Rah!

Odie will be watching your every move,

and every time you go off your diet,

he'll blow his whistle and I will come running.

Grrrr!

That is the dumbest thing
I've ever heard of in my life.

I'm gonna put an end
to this charade right now.

Someday you're going to
thank me for this, Garfield.

[ laughs ]

You're in desperate trouble, mister.

Well, might as well see
how the old diet's going.

Hello, I'm RX2, your talking scale.

I can tell you your weight, your fortune or

just about anything else you would like to know.

Okay, smarty pants, what's my name?

Judging by your weight, you are Orson Welles.

Great. A voice chip with a cruel streak.

May I have your autograph, please?

Oh, shut up.

Why is everybody picking on me?

What's wrong with being large boned, anyway?

I've seen all your movies.

Hey, how would you like
to have your battery removed?

I wouldn't like that, Mr. Welles.

It's not like I'm all that overweight.

I can still see my feet.

I've seen Citizen Kane eight times.

Alright, that's it, you're history.

[ heart monitor sounds fading ]

Rosebud!

[ heart monitor sounds fade out ]

[ upbeat music ]

Odie! Oh Odie, yoo hoo!

Are you anywhere around here boy?

It's snack time!

[ whistles ]

[ music tempo increasing ]

[ whistle higher in pitch ]

[ music tempo increasing ]

[ whistle higher in pitch ]

[ music tempo increasing ]

[ whistle at highest pitch ]

[ music tempo changing ]

[ whistle pitch changes with movement ]

The lack of food must be
making me hallucinate.

Good morning Garfield, sleep well?

Well, aren't we nasty today.

Save your energy, Garfield.

Nothing you do can spoil my good mood.

It's Thanksgiving and I have
a dinner date with a dream boat.

Oh ho, which reminds me,
she'll be here in about three hours,

so I better get the old
turkey out of the freezer.

♪ Gonna fix dinner for the girl ♪

♪ I love, hoo hoo ♪
[ scatting ]

Okay, first we start with the bird.

Let's see here, remove bird from

freezer at least 24 hours before cooking.

Oop, well, I'm sure that's
just a minor technicality.

[ thud ]

Yum, yum, turkey on a stick.

Remove giblets from cavity and

stuff with one cup of prepared stuffing.

Oh well, you can't believe everything you read.

I can hardly bear to watch.

Place in roasting pan, breast side up.

Rub skin with butter.

Hmm, well, I don't see what
good that'll do, but okay.

Cover with foil and roast at 325 degrees
for five and a half hours.

I guess I'll just have to speed things up a bit.

500 degrees, that was easy.

Okay, now for the vegetables.

Let's see corn, broccoli,

brussel sprouts, turnips, squash.

Be still my beating heart.

Add water and done.

Hmm, to hear Mom and Grandma talk,

I always thought preparing a
Thanksgiving meal was tough. Ha!

I'll get back to this later.

I'd better spruce myself up a bit.

Thanksgiving... humbug!

What good is it if you're on a diet?

If I can't enjoy Thanksgiving, nobody will.

You know old buddy,

if you want something in this world,

you just gotta reach out and grab it.

Know what I mean?

I mean, I'm a man, right?

Well, you're a wimpy man,
but yeah, you're a man.

And Liz, she's a woman, right?

No Jon, she's a Veterinarian

and a cruel one, at that.

It's time this relationship
with Liz got off the ground.

She's the one I want,

and by golly, I intend to get her.

Careful, you're starting to
sweat off your shaving cream.

I'm going to win her heart Garfield, you'll see.

I'm in control of my own destiny.

Ahh!

Ever considered putting someone

else in charge of your destiny?

Garfield, I need help.

Ha, understatement of the year.

As you know, clothes make the man,

I need your frank opinion

on what to wear for dinner.

How about the formal look?

[ raspberries ]

Semi formal.

[ raspberries continue ]

Informal.

High roller.

The sporty look.

Disco Jon.

Peace!

The rugged individualist.

[ ♪ jaunty sea shanty ♪ ]

[ raspberries continue ]

I'm running out of clothes, Garfield.

You got any suggestions?

Yeah, try dressing as yourself.

Maybe if I just dressed as myself.

The guy has a shaky grasp of the obvious.

How's this?

Bingo!

With one teeny, tiny, little exception.

[ doorbell rings ]

Oh, boy, she's here Garfield, she actually came!

When it comes to insecurity,
Jon's a heavyweight.

Liz, nice to see ya.

Nice polka dot boxer shorts.

Oops.

[ slams door ]

Thanks for telling me I wasn't
wearing any pants, Garfield.

Oh sure, blame it on the pet.

Come on.
I want you to be nice to my dinner guest.

First, I have to be fashion consultant

and now I have to be an actor.

[ zipping up pants ]

Come in, come in, my dear.

Welcome to my humble abode.

It's not much, but we like to call it home.

Yeah, come in, Doc.

Tell me, are you fond of indigestion?

Hmm. Something smells.

Oh, that's just a little Thanksgiving
dinner I whipped up.

I was afraid of that.

Make yourself comfortable, Liz.

I need to slip into the kitchen to take
care of a few last minute details.

Yeah, like finding something to eat.

So, Garfield how's the diet?

I see you're still the size
of an aircraft carrier.

Well, as long as you're here, I might as
well check you for any deficiencies.

don't want you to become anemic.

Don't forget beriberi, rickets
and scurvy too, Doc.

Sometimes people who suffer
from vitamin deficiencies

as a result of dieting can become listless.

[ Garfield starts making ailment noises ]

DR LIZ: They can also be irritable.

DR LIZ: or nervous.

DR LIZ: Sometimes they suffer
from an uncontrollable twitch.

DR LIZ: or even dementia.

DR LIZ: They may even have
difficulty in breathing.

[ gasping ]

You know, Garfield, maybe this

diet has been too hard on you.

I'd rather see you fat and
healthy than like this.

Maybe, I could let you skip
the diet for right now

and start you with some
mild exercise instead.

Would you like that?

I'm free. I'm free. I can eat.

Oh, joy. Oh, rapture.

Oh no!

[ thud ]

Hey Jon, another frozen dinner?

[ thud ]

Everything is ruined, Garfield.

What can I do? I'm doomed.

Liz will never speak to me again.

[ chime ]

[ clunk ]

Very funny, Garfield. I can't feed Liz this.

Jon, you nitwit.

Now, this is Grandma's favorite record.

Should I play it for Liz?

This old pillow grandma

crocheted is comforting Garfield,

but it still doesn't solve
the problem with dinner!

I'm not cold Garfield.

Why did you drag out the sweater

grandma made for me last Christmas?

Last chance!

I know!

I'll call grandma! She'll know what to do!

Jon, you're a genius!

If he had a brain he'd be dangerous.

Thanks Grandma, you're a life saver.

See you in a few.

[ loud motorcycle engine then braking ]

[ door slams ]

Have cooking utensils, will travel!
[ laughs heartily ]

Well, what are you just
standing for there, boy?

Get in there and spark your young lady friend,

and leave the kitchen to grandma.

Shoo, shoo!

Now, where's the patient?

How's dinner coming?

Great! Uh, just great.

It's uh, simmering or whatever food does.

Mmm-hmm. Can I give you a hand?

No, uh, thanks! You know,

one of the things I always like to do for

Thanksgiving right before
the meal is to reminisce

on the real meaning of Thanksgiving.

Are you serious?

Just what is Thanksgiving?

Is it a day just like any other day? No.

Is it an object like my
old trusty chair here?

No! Thanksgiving is a holiday,
a harvest festival, really.

A day for giving thanks for our blessings.

You are serious.

How's my favorite kittiecat today?

Better now that you're here, Grandma.

Oh you're looking a little thin.

Isn't that grandson of mine feeding you?

Grandma, I love you. Don't ever leave us.

My, my, my, my, my what have we here?

Looks like something the cat dragged in

if you'll pardon the expression, Garfield.

Well, I love a challenge and

this sure as heck looks like one.

Stand back Garfield, this is war.

Now the first Thanksgiving was in 1621,

the Pilgrims had had a good harvest,

so Governor Bradford declared
a three day feast, you see.

They invited their Indian friends to

join them and everyone brought food.

There was venison, turkey, duck, fish.

[ chainsaw at full throttle ]

What's that?

Sounds like, uh, the dishwasher.

So there was hot corn meal,
bread and Indian pudding.

You ever had grandma's famous
Turkey Croquettes, Garfield?

- Nothing finer.
- Go grandma, go.

There, we'll just put together
a little white sauce.

A bit of parsley, a dash of lemon juice,
some grated onion.

Now we'll add a little turkey
to the white sauce,

make some bread and roll the mixture
in the breadin' and deep fat fry.

Deep fat fry, deep fat fry.

Music to my ears.

Interestingly enough,
it was Abraham Lincoln who

officially proclaimed the last Thursday

in November as Thanksgiving
in 1863, you see.

- Mm-hm.
- Now get this, in Canada,

they celebrate Thanksgiving, too.

But it's not on the fourth
Thursday of November.

>> Mm-hm.
They celebrate it on the

second Monday in October. Isn't that wild?

[ yawns ]
I had no idea.

How about some sweet potatoes?

[ raspberries ]

Aw now, come on Garfield.

You never had Grandma's sweet potatoes.

This is true.

A cup a butter. A cup of brown sugar.

And some marshmallows.

I'm starting to like 'em already.

Now guess where it'd be
if you were to bow before

a shrine of candles and
offer a bowl of rice.

Any guesses?

It'd be in Japan, and they
call it Labor Thanksgiving Day.

Have you ever seen my
split-second cranberry sauce?

Too late, you blinked, Garfield.

[ laughs heartily ]

And now, for the Pièce de résistance!

Pumpkin pie!

Skip the Pièce de résistance,

just give me a piece a pie.

Nice touch.

Now, I'll just slip quietly out the door, Garfield.

You tell that young lady of his that she

couldn't find a better man than Jon and she better

not blow it or she'll have to answer to me

Oh, and Garfield, eat a piece of pie for me.

They just don't make 'em like that anymore.

And in England, their Thanksgiving is called

Harvest Home Day. Now, in Bolivia...

Oh, I think things should
just about be ready.

Where am I?

Dinner is serv-ed, madam.

Oh, Jon, I'm so impressed.

So am I.

♪ It's a quiet celebration ♪

♪ With family and friends ♪

♪ A time for counting blessings ♪

♪ a time to make amends ♪

♪ There's a feeling all around you ♪

♪ you can hold it in your hands ♪

♪ And pass it round the table for ♪

♪ all to understand ♪

♪ Though tomorrow may take us far away ♪

♪ Let's stick together now ♪

♪ Let's find a way some how ♪

♪ to feel Thanksgiving ♪

♪ every day ♪

That was a wonderful meal.

- Thanks for inviting me, Jon.
- Same time next year?

Mmm-hmm, that'd be nice.

I'll be here before the meal,

but after the history lesson.

Well, it was a great day!

And judging by the looks

of you two and your bellies,

I'd say you had a great day, too.

I know one thing I'm thankful for today,

- Grandma!
- Grandma!

Well, let's take a little walk and

try to work off some of this food, boys.

Come on, boy. Come on, Odie.

Oh no.

Not you, too.

I suppose we'll have to put you

on a diet as of right now.

Alright, Odie, give me ten.

And wipe that stupid smile off your face.

Come on, soldier, I said down and ten.

One, and two, and one, and two.

Are we having fun yet?

One, and two, and one, and two.

♪ Do the mashed potato ♪

♪ Do the candied yam ♪

♪ Do the funky turkey ♪

♪ 'Cause it's time to jam ♪

♪ If you don’t want to dance ♪

♪ Baby, that's alright ♪

♪ Do some non-stop shoppin' ♪

♪ To work up an appetite ♪

♪ Make your Thanksgivin' one long meal ♪

♪ 'Cause the more you eat ♪

♪ The more grateful ♪

♪ You are gonna feel ♪

♪ ♪