Gagman (1989) - full transcript

Lee Jong-se is a third-rate comedian who believes himself to be a creative genius. He desires nothing more than to be a movie director. When he befriends barber, Mun Do-seok who has hopes to become an actor, it seems like a match made in heaven and the two set off to make a film

Taehung Pictures


Produced by Lee Tee-won

Written by Lee Myung-Se
and Bae Chang-ho

Ahn Sung-ki

Hwang Cine

Bae Chang-ho

Chan Moo-song

Guest starring Kim Se-jun
and Son Chang-min

Cho Ju-mi, Ju Ho-sung, Choi Jong-won,
Chu Bong, Cho Chul-nam, Cho Sun-muk

Park Bu-yang, Jeong Young-guk, Cho Yun-jin,
Na Kap-sung, Park Yong-pal, Kim Kyung-ran

Lee Hae-ryong, Shin Chan-il,
Ahn Jin-su, Yu Min-suk

Film Processing: Korean Film Council,
Mixing: Hanyang Studio

Special thanks to

Andre Kim Design Atelier,
Seoul Bank Euljiro 3-ga Branch

Chowon House, the workers of Su-saek Station,
the residents of Imgye-myeon, Gangwon-do

Music credits


Props assistant: Jang Suk-bum,
Special effects assistant: Kim Baek-jin

Recording assistants: Kim Won-yong, Kim Dong-ui,
Negative cutting: Kwon Mi-suk

Lighting assistants: Ham Hyung-suk, Lee Suk-hwan,
Kim Chang-sun, Chon Sang-hyuk

Camera assistants: Kim Myung-su, Kim Sung-bok,
Kim Hyung-gu, Lee Byung-ho

Assistant directors: Gu Im-seo, Oh Seuk-keun,
Continuity: Choi Eun-sil

Props: Kim Tae-uk,
Special effects: Kim Chol-seok

Production design: Do Yong-u,
Stills: Yang Ki-ju

Dresser: Chae Hoon, Hair and Makeup: Cho Kyung-bok,
Photography: Koo Bon-chang

Production manager: Chon Yung-haeng,
Assistant production manager: No Pyung-cheol

Editing: Kim Hyun

Recording: Lee Young-gil

Music: Kim Soo-chul

Lighting: Cha Jeong-nam

Cinematography: You Young-gil

Directed by Lee Myung-Se

Real hot today, isn't it?

Never cared for summer myself

We'd only have spring, fall, and winter
if it were up to me

Say, mister

Are you fond of dog meat?

It's the only thing that keeps my energy
up in summer

It's not fattening, so you can eat as much
as you want

But I can't eat the stuff they serve
at restaurants these days

They get all these poodles and spitzes,
any kind, really

and just feed them water

so the meat's all tough and
there's nothing to eat on them

When it comes to dog meat

nothing beats a good old Korean mutt

I was looking through the weeklies
and I saw that

Lee Ju-il paid over
a hundred million won in taxes

I guess they make big bucks
in the entertainment business

He wasn't born into money either

I guess some people are just touched
by a lucky star

You must have always had
something special, too, mister

Making your way in show business and all

Mind you, I've been going to the movies
since I was in the womb

They say my mother loved them

So maybe that's why
I've always wanted to be an actor

I used to watch movies all the time

You remember Kirk Douglas in
'The Vikings'?

That was a great movie

Remember when the Vikings come back
and have a feast

That scene where Kirk Douglas is eating
a roasted chicken

Mmm, mmm.
He really goes for that chicken

Poor guy

Give him a rose and he would boil it
and eat it like dog meat

Poor guy

That guy at the back, third from the right,
with the glasses

Could be a bank teller

How he can afford to drink here?

Somebody greased his palm for a loan,

Poor guy

Spends his days counting money and
trying to get girls in bed

Poor guy

Number 17 over there, she's laughing
on the outside

But on the inside, all she cares about
is her tips

I see that lady came again tonight

With a younger guy this time

Poor woman

Play her Beethoven and
she would dance the jitterbug

When did dreams give way to bread

When did cash take the place of romance

When did this world turn into a desert

where not a single blade of grass would grow?

What should Lee Jong-sae,
genius of this age

do in such a world?

This has been your twittering skylark,
your lovable buffoon

The always humble and always available

Comedian Lee Jong-sae

I look forward to seeing you at the
Mammoth again very soon

Good night to you all

Hello Yeah, it's me

What's up? Oh, I'm fine

How's my Michelle?

I'm worried she's getting fat,
she's gained one kilo this past month

She's such a picky eater

She won't touch cheese or milk

I should put her on a diet

Speaking of which, where is she?
Just a sec

Michelle, Michelle?


Sorry, sorry

How's my husband?
He's coming back today

You know he was in the States on a
business trip

No, I'm not the lonely type

He works and I go shopping with my friends

I go to the movies, I enjoy my life

Oh, you switched to golf, too?

I agree.
Aerobics is so tiring and not even fun

I switched to golf, too

You're hitting bogeys already?

Look at you, the pro

Sorry, I have to go now, he's home

Sure, let's play a round sometime
next week

Bye then

Is that you, honey?

It's Lee, ma'am

I'm sorry, ma'am,
but the chief had an accident

on the way home from the airport

He's in surgery now and
we don't have a prognosis yet


- Miss You, are you crazy?
- Oh, I'm sorry

I can't stop laughing at his face


You're the director, aren't you?

My compliments, sir

- You have, what, ten scenes left?
- Oh, yes

Can I ask you about the theme
of the movie you're shooting?

Don't you agree that it's rather passé?

We should start filming next month
at the latest, don't you think?

Summer would be best for setting the mood

For the dreamy, haunting, languid quality
I'm going for

And I know it's taking a risk but
I'd like to cast newcomers

I don't see anyone fresh enough
for this film

Sorry, but who are you?

I see you've forgotten my name

It's easy to remember
if you think of skylarks

My name is Jong-sae, Lee Jong-sae

I sent you a script at your office
some time ago

I wrote that script

- Oh, I see.
- You have a break in filming tomorrow, yes?

I need my sleep in the morning so

what do you say about meeting at
three o'clock in the afternoon?

We could meet then to discuss the
filming schedule

Sir, your TV interview is ready to go


Modern women are going through a crisis,
in my opinion

This film takes a serious look at the
sex life of modern couples

as sex becomes commodified in
modern society

Miss You

You're known for being good at love scenes

- Does that come from experience?
- Well, I...

I'm sorry

Sorry about that, let's take this again

Just a minute, I need a fresh tape

You know the Won Cafe', in front of the
Secret Garden

right across from Shinwon Wedding Hall?

I'll see you there at three o'clock

Excuse me

- Look here, Cho
- Yes, sir

Can't you do your job properly? Hmm?


That guy with the mustache

Why are you letting riffraff like that
on set?

I thought you knew him

- Because he was always around you
- No, no!

Do I look like someone who knows
someone like that? Hmm?

In this movie you play a character

who's slightly hysterical, yes?

Let's go to tape here

What is your name, sir?

Your twittering skylark, your beloved

The always humble and always available

- Comedian Lee Jong-sae at your service, sir
- Ah, yes

And you play a comedian in this movie?

Oh, I'm not an actor
I'm a new director

Oh, I see

I have a project coming up with
Mr Jeong's company

Is that so?

Soon the film will be ready for
all 40 million of Korea's people to see


I advise you to ask all the questions
you want now

as it will be very hard to interview me
once the movie is out

Hey, you!

This man is nobody, an onlooker

- Excuse me?
- Oh, my

Come over here, I said

What are you gawking at?
Back to work!

- Who are you?
- Excuse me?

The always humble and always available

comedian Lee Jong-sae at your service, sir

Get out

Before I throw you out, OK?

Three o'clock at the Won Café,
in front of the Secret Garden

Please remind the director so
he doesn't forget

I told you to get out of here!

Ladies and Gentlemen

It is my pleasure to address
this distinguished gathering

of those who truly love and understand

as the medium of dreams and romance

Thank you for being here to share
this moment with me

And, and...

And, and...

I would like to offer my profound thanks

to our staff and cast, who worked tirelessly
to make this film

This award I have been honored with today

is not merely a personal honor for
Lee Jong-sae the individual

but a victory for the great art of film itself

That great medium that shoots through
the darkness of this world and mankind

like an unstoppable midnight express

Oh that's hot!


Got any new Lee Hyun-se comics?

No, the only new ones we have are
Huh Young-man

Why, sir!

What are you doing
in a place like this, sir?

- Looking for material
- Oh, of course

I saw the movie version of this in
the late-night theater

but the comic was so much better

Hey mister, you finished with these?

I want that one too
when you're finished, OK?

Comics these days are
such a bad influence on children

It's all sports or robot stuff

It was better in our day, sir

Um Hee-ja's 'Glass Castle,'
Kim Jong-re's 'Searching for Mama'

Park Ki-jeong's 'To Go There,'
masterpieces all of them

Then there was science fiction

Sanho's 'Lifi,' 'Tetsujin 28-go'

Park Bu-seong's 'Magic Wand'

They really blew my mind

And Kim Kyung-in's 'Kabuli the Doctor'
or Chu Dong-seong's 'Dr. Jjanggu'

Oh, Chu Dong-seong is what Go U-young
used to go by

- I know
- Of course, sir

Or take Im Chang's 'Ttaingi'
or Park Ki-jun's 'Dutongi'

Great character studies, don't you think?


- You said you wanted be an actor, right?
- Who, me?

Aw, that was when I was young

I know I'm not cut out to be an actor

If only people really understood comics

they would understand me

- Moon
- Yes?

You're the first person I've met who really
understands me

You'd make a wonderful character actor,

I've written a script

that I'm supposed to direct soon

I was worried because I couldn't find
an actor to play the lead

I think I've finally found him

Wait for me to contact you

Thank you for giving me this chance

Thank you, I won't let me down

- How many?
- Five

You can't fool me
I saw you sneaking two more

I'll do my best. Thank you

Get a room!

- Come on, let's go
- She must have skipped somewhere else

Isn't dancing enough for them?

They buy you a few drinks and think
they can jump all over you

Thanks, mister


Um... cup of coffee?

You've got a really funny face, mister

I feel like I've seen you before somewhere

Are you in showbiz?


Did I see you on TV?
Are you on TV, mister?

I'm a director

Are you really a director?

What movies did you direct?

None, yet

You think I could be a movie star or what?


You mind if I come home with you?

Two-faced con artist

You pretend you're doing me a favor

but you're nothing but a wolf
in sheep's clothing

Oh, you'll take me home
and ply me with whiskey

and when I fall into a drunken stupor

you'll put me on the bed

and take off my clothes

I never asked you to come home with me

It was you that asked to c-come

It's getting late, take a cab with this

What do you think?

How was my acting? Mister?

I always wanted to be a singer

But I think from today I'd rather be
an actress

The time?
Oh, it must be 2:30 or so

- You're home late, sir
- Now, where was building 902

It's the building right next to yours, sir

Now if you go this way and take that way

you come right up to... my house

The moment I saw you, I, I...

Words are such empty things

How could I express the fire in my heart
for you

with a few trifling words?

Mister, can I use your toothbrush?

I am your toothbrush

Let me be your toothbrush forever

so I may brush every inch of your body

Oh, tonight I must get drunk

Your face is too dazzling to gaze upon

I could not bear it without liquid courage

Here I go on like some love-struck girl

What's happening to me?

Oh, I feel like my heart is going to stop

Please, have a seat

Is this you, mister?

- What? Do you mind?
- No, not at all

Why did you make this so weak?

I take mine straight

The moment I saw you, my heart went...

It's so hot this year

Where are you going on holiday this year?

- I... you...
- Have you been to Hwajinpo?

I was there last year

The beach isn't bad

but the hotel wasn't up to standard

Have you been to Haeundae, mister?

I haven't been there yet

That's where I'm going on holiday this year

They've got lots of discotheques and
dumb rich guys

I wish I had just one hundred million won

I don't know why I can't win the lottery

I... I feel like getting drunk tonight

Have a drink, then

Where do I sleep?


And a pillow

I really need my beauty sleep or I get

so don't wake me up even if
you get up early

The mercury's hitting 2,000 degrees
out there today

so thank you for forsaking your families
on 'Family Day'

to grace the Mammoth with your presence

It is my pleasure to open the Mammoth's
famous variety show

with laughs, songs, and dancing by
very pretty girls

Now, for our first act

Our special singer, Rambo!

Hands up

Hands up

Hands up, I said!


I repeat, warning

Don't move or make a sound

Or you will be killed instantly

This is an order

A soldier does not give orders twice

Turn on the lights

Turn on the lights!

Turn on the lights!

Mister, do you have a smoke?

No, sorry

I never took up smoking

What sort of work do you do?

The always humble and always available

Your twittering skylark,
Lee Jong-sae at your service

What are you doing here?

The club is closed today

so I'm rehearsing on my own

Hey, mister

do you know where the bathroom is?

An armed deserter, regiment unknown,

is currently on the run in the direction of
old Chunho-dong crossing

Police and military authorities are
working together in pursuit

Further updates will be available
on the regular news

as soon as the authorities have more

This has been breaking news

They should round up ungrateful pigs
like that

Give 'em the firing squad
right in the middle of Gwanghwamun

What's wrong with these jokers?

We feed 'em, clothe 'em, learn 'em skills

All with taxpayers' money

Kids these days

No upbringing whatsoever

Addressing their elders with the familiar

And the gals!
All those little gals smoking

and kissing all over the place

soon as they get in a car

I don't know what this world is coming to

Know what I mean? Sir

P-please, let me go

I didn't see anything

I've got a wife and five kids

I would never turn you in

Please let me go

This is all the fare I made today

Please, just spare my life

Don't move, or I'll shoot

Bond, my name is Bond

James Bond

Shanghai Park

For 20 years I've been waiting
for this day

Living on cold boiled barley
in my freezing cell

Whetting my blade, counting the days
to take my revenge

I forgave you for stealing my beloved
Jeong-nim away from me

I forgave you for selling Ok-hee,
my only sister,

to a brothel



I could never forgive you

for betraying a man's sacred promise

Shanghai Park

Take out your sword

Show me what you're made of

Oh, sir, it's you

I've been waiting for you to contact me

I've been going for a Jack Nicholson look

There's no one like Jack Nicholson

when it comes to character actors

Draw the curtains


I've sold the barber shop

I got an offer yesterday

so I let it go on the cheap

I've had my eyes done

They were too small, so I got an operation
to make them bigger

I know I shouldn't mention this

but I'm happy to work without a salary

seeing that I'm a newcomer and all


There's a new bar right next door called
Million Dollar Salon

If you have the time I'd like to invite
you there tonight

as my guest

- Do you know how to shoot a gun?
- Huh? No, not a revolver

I'm so sorry, I wasn't in active service
in the army


This looks exactly like a real gun

Is it for the movie?

I know how to use this one, it was part of
our training

If you need me to shoot a revolver
I can learn how to do that, too

- What's this?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, it's the buttstock, sir

- This?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, the front sight, sir

- This?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, the pistol grip, sir

- This?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, the trigger, sir

- This?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, the magazine, sir

- This?
- Sir, Private Moon Do-suk, the barrel, sir


I take it we're making an action movie?

- Yes
- Oh, that's a relief

I was worried it was going to be a drama

I'm more comfortable with action than
drama, you see

- Lock and load
- Yes, sir

Sir, there's this bit I've been practicing

Would you like me to do it for you now?

- Sure, get ready!
- Yes, sir

Sound, lights, camera

Standby, ready, go!

Shanghai Park

Just a sec, sir

Shanghai Park

For 20 years I've been waiting
for this day

Living on cold boiled barley
in my freezing cell

Whetting my blade, counting the days
to take my revenge

I forgave you for stealing my beloved
Jeong-nim away from me

I forgave you for selling Ok-hee,
my only sister,

to a brothel

However I could never forgive you

for betraying a man's sacred promise

Shanghai Park

Take out your gun!



Scene 20, cut 1, take 2

Let's go



I hear that when a wife leaves her
husband's house

that husband has no legal responsibility

to her anymore

Anyway, I absolve you of all
responsibility now

You're no longer tied down by me

We are both free now


What are you doing here again?

Sir, this is your last chance

You'll regret it for the rest of your life
if you let me slip away

Dammit, stop laughing!

Cho! Where's that Cho?

He went to the bathroom

Sir, everything's ready to go now

I've found some
really good new actors, too

I'm sure you'll like them
when you meet them

- Look here, Cho
- Sir?

What did I tell you about keeping order
on set?

You! You're back?

- Get me a cup of coffee
- You come with me

Where's that coffee?

I could kill you

Do you understand? Huh?

I said cut it out!

Of all the stupid...

Shanghai Park

For 20 years I've been waiting
for this day

Living on cold boiled barley
in my freezing cell

Whetting my blade, counting the days
to take my revenge

I forgave you for stealing my beloved
Jeong-nim away from me

I forgave you for selling Ok-hee,
my only sister,

to a brothel


However I could never forgive you

for betraying a man's sacred promise

Shanghai Park!

Take out your gun!

- Hello, this is a pleasant surprise
- Don't talk to me

What a loser, can you believe
the nerve of this guy

He wants me to go on holiday with him
and he doesn't even have a credit card

Who's taking the slow train to Busan
in this heat?

It's so hot in here

I thought you were on TV, mister,
don't you have air conditioning?

Get away from me, what's your problem?

You're a handsy one, aren't you?

- Is your shower broken?
- Yes

I got a call from maintenance saying
the water's off until five


Can you pass me my bag over there?

Who are you, for real?

I'm a director, this is a prop

Cut it out

P-please don't shoot

It's loaded, it's a real gun

Where did you get a real gun?

It was a gift

You're wanted, aren't you?

What did you do?

Fraud? Robbery-murder? Rape?

I'll shoot if you don't tell me

Wait, I'm not really a director

My name is Lee Jong-sae, the comedian

I'm going for a nap

Wake me up when the water comes back on

Aren't there any adult comics in this?

I wish something exciting would happen

Like a war

Hey, mister

You said this was a real gun, right?

Let's make a movie

I'll play the lead

You just need a hundred million won or so

You can't let your genius rot for that
puny sum, can you?

- Huh?
- Huh


Why don't we rob a bank?

Like in a Hollywood movie

Good afternoon


I'm looking for fresh faces

Wanna be a movie star?

So you've got one security guard

and twelve employees

Am I right?

The panic button's under your foot, right?

Isn't that right?

How many minutes for the cops to show up
when you press that?

Just a minute, sir

Now that's some quality air conditioning


I'm looking for fresh faces

Wanna be a movie star?

- Is something the matter?
- Good afternoon, sir

How many minutes does it take for the cops
to arrive after the bell?

About three minutes is it?

How much cash do you have there?

Who are you?

I'm Moon, the actor

Could you speak up, please

I'm Moon, the actor

How can we help you today?

My director asked me

to make some discreet inquiries
for the movie we're making

So that's what I'm doing

- What kind of film is it?
- It's an action movie

What's it called?

You know what,
let me go ask and come back

Thank you


I made the inquiries you asked me to

There's one security guard and
12 employees

And it takes about three minutes
for the police to arrive

after the panic alarm goes off

But I wasn't able to find out
the other stuff

What is our title? It's a gang movie,
isn't it?

Settle down, fellas, you're like bulls
in a china shop

Oh, it's hot

- Sir
- You like dog-meat soup, don't you?

Let me order a bowl for you

One bowl of dog-meat soup, please!

What? Who orders dog-meat soup in a
snack restaurant?

What a joke

Sir, am I supposed to be playing a robb...

Oh, did I drop that?


Am I playing a bank robber in the movie?

You like steamed dumplings, don't you?

I used to eat fifty in one sitting

Now thirty is all I can manage


I know it's not my place, so don't
take this to heart

but, when I look at other movies

bank robbers use revolvers, not rifles

Why are there so many flies in this shop?

It's summer, show me a restaurant that
doesn't have flies

- How much do I owe you?
- Two thousand won

Oh, you came all the way here?

The title is still a secret!

Shanghai Park, bang bang!

You, fatty, get out

Do you have any brain cells at all?


Do you think this is a game? Huh?

You can't talk to me like that, even if
you're the main actress

I'm older than you

Then act your age, dumb-ass

Stuffing your face all the time and
dumb as a sack of rocks


I can't take this any longer


What are you going to do, then?

I'm the one who can't take it any longer!

Who told you to bring the police back with
you, dumb-ass?

I didn't know what the title was!

I can't work with fatty over there

He's going to be the ruin of us

Call it off now or let the fatty go,
you decide

Sir, I was just doing what you asked me to

Didn't you ask me to find out things
for the movie?

It's not for the movie, stupid, it's for real

For real

We're going to rob a bank, for real?

You're pulling my leg, sir

Do I look like someone who would pull
your leg?

There are no more masterpieces
in this age in which we live

No 'Gone with the Wind,'
no 'Ben Hur'

No 'Sorrow up in Heaven,'
everything gone with the wind

We live in a whirlwind racing towards
the 21st century

Who will make the pièce de résistance
of this era?

Who has the vision for mankind to follow?

Many are the days that Lee Jong-sae toiled

and tortured himself to solve this riddle

Finally he gave birth to his masterpiece

A stroke of light in this desert of



When I met you, Sun-young, a pure lily,

and you, Do-suk, a strong character actor,

When I found my two leads

my heart burst with joy

and I felt certain that
this would be the making of

a masterpiece that every one of the
40 million Koreans could see


However, the masses, in thrall to
the gods of consumerism

failed to recognize this work of genius
for what it was

Do you want Lee Jong-sae
to lay his dreams away forever?

N-n-no, sir

Do you want to see Lee Jong-sae defeated
for want of one hundred million won?

Forgive me, sir

Hello, is there something wrong
with your car?

- You're trembling
- N-no sir

It's just s-so h-hot in the car

Stay cool

Don't worry, I'm a man of my word

I'm falling asleep here, get a move on

Are you ready?

Yes, sir

Sir, can I have a minute?


I need to go for a number two

You can go in ten minutes

Hands up! Freeze, or I'll shoot!

Hands up! Hands up!

This is a real bank robbery!

You over there, don't move!

We know where the panic button is!

- Where's the safe?
- Th-the safe...

Open the safe!

Open it!

We don't have the key

The manager went out and took the key
with him

Don't lie to me!

It's true

He went out to the Buho Café with a guest

Shall I go bring him back?


Sir, don't let them trick you!

Wait a minute

Don't move or I'll shoot!

Hey, you

Put your hands up!

Where do you come from?


Namdaemun or Dongdaemun?

You ever heard of Ssangcal?

You're speaking to Ssangcal of Seodaemun

Back in the day we used axes or
sushi knives

We didn't fool around with toy guns
like this

You think you're the Mafia or what?
Shut up!

Pipe down, fatty

You want to attract the cops again?

What are you doing? Chop chop!

Freeze, or I'll shoot!

Ladies and gentlemen

This is your host, your twittering skylark
your beloved buffoon

The always humble
and always available Jong-sae

Comedian Lee Jong-sae

The mercury's hitting 2,000 degrees
out there today

so thank you for forsaking your families
on 'Family Day'

to grace the Mammoth with your presence

Before we open the Mammoth's famous
variety show

with a barrel of laughs, songs, and dancing
by very pretty girls

let me order a round for the house

You think I'm joking?

Two bottles of our coldest beer
for every table, please!

Why am I buying drinks for the house?

Has the heat gone to my head, you ask?

Not at all

Is it my birthday? Wrong again

Have I won the lottery?
No, I have not

Did I make a killing on a vacant lot
I bought with my savings?

No, not that either

This is top secret

but the bank robbery in Munsan today

That was me, Lee Jong-sae

The real reason why I'm buying you a drink

is because I'm finally making
my feature film debut

I couldn't have done it without you

Now, it so happens that my two lead actors

have decided to honor us
with a visit today

Will you please welcome them to the stage!

My, my, I can see why Brooke Shields
decided to retire

Will you feast your eyes on this
beauty's curves...

...under her clothes, I'm afraid.
What are your measurements?

36, 24, 36

Mr. Moon, how do you feel about
your first feature film role?

It's an honor

An honor I have our director,
Mr. Lee Jong-sae, to thank for

I wouldn't be standing here today
without you!

Thank you, thank you

Now, what song are you two
going to sing for us tonight?

Susie Q!

Oh, yeah! Susie Q!

- Hands up!
- Freeze, or I'll shoot!


What's going on here?

Scoot along there

The main actress always gets paid more

Answer the door

Who is it?

It's the cops, say I'm not here, alright?

I didn't do anything wrong

I did what I was told, that's all

I'm not responsible, I'm going home

Shut up, fatty

You'll be shot if you go out now,
do you hear?

Open up at once!

If you don't come out
I'm going to shoot you myself

Come on and open this door

There's nothing to be afraid of,
we've come this far

We don't have any details yet

Go on and answer it

If you don't I'm really going to shoot

Be brave for us, sir

We'll cover you


Whatever you do, act naturally

I'm officer Kim from the city police

Hello, hello

My respected officer

Please let me thank you
for all your tireless work

protecting the well-being
and property of our families

when it's 2,000 degrees out there

Thank you

May I come in and take a look around?

Excuse me? Oh, of course

You live alone?


My mother just came up from the country
for a visit

- Did I say my mother? I meant my sister-in-law
- Oh, I see

- What is your profession?
- Yes?

Your profession, sir

The always humble and always available

Moon Do-suk at your service, sir

You must make a mint,
working in show business

You know it's all over the news that
there have been a lot of armed robberies lately

- Banks have been robbed in full daylight
- My goodness

Corner shops, clothing boutiques,
these guys stop at nothing

They even threatened kids for money,
you know

- They've been at it every day
- They wouldn't really threaten kids, would they?

So there's a special directive in effect
now for officers to make rounds

visiting homes to check everything is fine

I see

Is this the bedroom?

That's a painting
Are you alright?

I'm fine

You should never leave cash or valuables
in prominent places

Oh, I wouldn't leave anything there

- What about here?
- Take a look?

- Is it here?
- Still cold

Where is it?

I don't remember

It's here, isn't it?

Where did you put it?

Don't worry

It's somewhere very safe

Where is it!

Where's the stuff?

Where's the rest?

The rest?

Take them off

Maybe I should get married

take up flower arranging, cook dinner

wash my husband's feet for him
when he gets back early

make tea for him

I think I'll have just two kids

One can be a movie star, the other
a singer

Know any eligible bachelors
around here, mister?

I'm not very demanding

I just need someone with two cars

and a house with a pool

You know the first scene of our movie

where the main character is attempting
suicide with gas

but the chair falls over and they fail?

That's life

Life always throws disappointment at you
at the crucial moment

I think that scene will really
crack the audience up

They'll be rolling in the aisles

I bet a million more people come to see it
because of that scene


do you know what my nickname was as a boy?

It was Genius, Boy Genius

I could read comic books when I was
two years old

When the neighborhood kids
were playing milk caps or tag

I was drawing comics

My uncle said that when I grew up

I should paint billboards for movie theaters

I guess billboard painters
made a lot of money in those days

When I was in the 9th grade,
we had a really cold winter

That winter I had a lot of very serious
thoughts on my mind

What is the meaning of life?

How are we supposed to live life,
doing what?

That was when I decided
I would be a film director

I thought that it was
such a glamourous job

From reading Lim Chang's
'Ttaengi and the Film Director'


The day has come

The day the dark, interminable winter
gives way to spring

and countless people come to watch
the film we made

We'll celebrate our wedding
inside the theater

Sun-young, I love you

Sir, you have to try some of these
sticky rice cakes

Real estate boom

Housing prices soar

Comedian Lee Jong-sae revealed
to be leader of armed robbery trio

Comedian Lee Jong-sae revealed
to be leader of armed robbery trio
I knew I shouldn't have sold the barber shop

Police agencies on nationwide
cooperative investigation alert
I knew I shouldn't have sold the barber shop

At this point

we pretend we've been in a car accident

Do-suk, you put some ketchup on
to look like blood

and lie in front of the car

Sun-young, you shout "Help" three times

in a very urgent voice

Everybody got that?

We get up at 8 tomorrow

- Yes, sir
- Hey, fatty

lay off the breakfast in the morning

We don't want you running to the
bathroom again

- Fine
- Let's have a toast

To one billion won

Comedian Lee Jong-sae has been revealed
to be the leader

of a trio that has committed a string of
armed robberies this past month

Police have arrested a
habitual police impersonator

who stole cash and cameras from
Lee Jong-sae's apartment

The goods have been confirmed a match
to those stolen in the robberies

giving the police a fresh lead
in the investigation

Now, in a special segment
we will hear from those

who knew the criminal Lee Jong-sae

Him? Let's see...
what can I say about him...

He had such a funny face

You get a lot of onlookers
when you're making a movie

I thought he was one of them,
so I let him off easy

but then he appeared again
a few days later

with this big guitar case

and he kept tapping it, like this

If I had only known there was a gun
in that case

I would have socked him then and there

I really don't know

He was always such a polite man

So pleasant and well-mannered

You would never think he would do
something like that

He used to come here almost every day

but I never saw him do anything wrong

except for sneaking a read now and then
without paying

All of these answers leave us demanding

who is Lee Jong-sae,
leader of the trio of desperate robbers?

Is he a megalomaniac
suffering from a Cinderella complex

increasingly common in young people
these days?

Or is he a friendly neighbor,
the polite man next door?

Let us now hear from Lee Jong-sae
in his own words

Your twittering skylark, your beloved
buffoon, the always humble

And always available Jong-sae,
comedian Lee Jong-sae at your service, sir

Soon the film will be ready for all
40 million of Korea's people to see

I advise you to ask all the questions
you want now

as it will be very hard to interview me
once the movie is out

Interview my ass, what a nutjob

How could someone who looks like that
do all that stuff?

Now for the weather forecast

The heat continues with highs of
30 degrees Celsius nationwide

and a discomfort index of 80

Be quiet

If you open your mouth, we'll shoot


Smile naturally


Is my face really that funny?

I never missed a single
reserves training session in my life

I even have a plaque from the
district office saying "Best Barber"

I haven't done anything wrong

Is it a crime to want to become an actor?

Hey, fatty!

How many times do you have to go
to the bathroom?

You must have been ten times at least

Look here, Do-suk

About that comic book shop owner

Did he have to tell about my reading
comics without paying?

Why are you sitting around
like two sad sacks?

Aren't you going to run for it?

Run? Why should I run?
I haven't done anything wrong!

I just did what I was told because
I wanted to be an actor

I was just taking orders, I'm innocent,
why would I run?

You fool

Didn't you hear what they were saying on TV?

You're an accomplice, didn't you hear?


You can stay here moping around

and go to jail for life or
face the firing squad or whatever

Are you going to go out looking like that?

Get rid of that stupid mustache now

or they'll get us
before we've gone one meter

- Let me do it for you, sir
- Come on

I'd rather die before I shave off my

Do-suk, come down

Stand over here

Give me "lonely"

Come down

Now, raise your head


Really let go, like Jack Nicholson

Like you're almost crying at the same time


That's it, this is it

The brook laps gently
under the brilliant moon

while the birds have gone quiet

A lone man stands on the bridge,
laughing to ease his broken heart

Then a woman appears

Hey, fatty

Have you gone completely nuts or what?


Scene 28 is going to be very romantic,
very moving

I'm so lucky, this is the perfect spot

What are you yammering about?
The car's broken

We need to get someone to fix the car

I have a terrible sense of direction at night

Fatty, you gotta go

I can't find my way at night, either

You want to stay here and get caught, then?


Now, those are some tasty-looking
ramen noodles

I see you're a ramen purist, no egg

You're right, putting eggs and scallions
in just ruins the flavor

Can I help you?

- My car broke down
- Oh, I see

Ramen noodles are best plain

Mister, you look familiar somehow

I'm a film actor

I knew it

You're in 'Bestseller Theater,' right?


It's an honor to meet you, sir

What are you doing in these parts?

Shooting a movie?


- We're shooting nearby
- Yes

And the car broke
down in front of the bridge

There must be a lot of
other actors, too, then

Who's the actress?

She's an unknown

Have you seen the news, mister?

With all these armed robberies

I don't take night calls these days

But this is a special case

You're a special guest here

Hey, mister

can I get your autograph?

What movies did your director make?

- He's a new director
- Oh

You know, I always thought that
when you made a movie

You needed people for the lights
and cameras and so on

Where'd they all go?

- Huh? Uh... They went for dinner.
- Oh, OK

Do you think I could become an actor?

Being an actor looks glamourous
from the outside

but it comes with a lot of hard work

Trust me, you're better off doing
what you do now

Yes, sir

You know that barber,
one of the three armed robbers?

Who? Moon Do-suk?
They haven't proved that yet

They found out about him just a while ago

They're saying that this barber fellow

liked actors so much

he went around telling everyone
he was an actor

What a tool, am I right?

Yeah, sounds like one

Try to start it

There you go

- Thank you
- It's fine

It's an honor just meeting you, sir

Goodbye, drive safe

Oh, sir

could I have your autograph, please?

Thank you



Stop! Stop!




Stop! Stop!

He's dead

The train is coming in 30 minutes

So I'm finally going to Haeundae

Hey, fatty

how many eggs have you had?

Look at all these shells

You must have eaten twenty of them

Give me a cigarette

Can I get a cigarette?

Huh? Huh...

You've really lost it, haven't you?

You dumb-ass.
Who told you to shoot a man dead?

If they catch you,
it's the death penalty for you now

What are we going to do now
when we get to Busan?

We'll stow away on a boat to Japan

get forged passports and go to Mexico

Then we'll cross the border and go to
Hollywood, the mecca of film

where genius director Lee Jong-sae
will realize all of his dreams

That's it

Look, Do-suk

We're going to Hollywood

We'll be there in three days or so

Boys, be ambitious!

We'll make movies
that amaze the whole world

Jong-sae Lee, world-famous director

World-famous actors Sun-young Oh,
Do-suk Moon

Good luck with that

I'm going to lay low in Haeundae
for a few days and go home

If you get caught, mister

say that your accomplice Oh Sun-young died

She was so overcome by guilt

she hurled herself into the sea, alright?

You got that too, fatty?


Got it?

Yeah, yeah

Hey fatty, when you become a superstar

don't forget me


Where are you going?


Is this the police?
I have a question for you

Oh, it's the fire department? Sorry

Hello, is this the police?

I have a question for you

Do you really get the death penalty
if you kill someone?

I really didn't mean to

but he just went and died

No, I didn't do it

Yes, it was an accomplice

Where am I?

I'm in front of the station

I'm going to Busan


I can't confess now

I'll call you in three days

We have reached our final destination,
Busan Station

Thank you for using the Saemaul train

Please make sure you have all your
belongings with you

before you get off the train

Whew, it's hot

It's perfect weather for swimming

I wonder if I should stop by Jagalchi
to have some whale meat or not

Look, Do-suk, do you speak English?


When we get to Hollywood, everything
will be in English

When you eat, even when you go to the

Hello, give me Kentucky chicken

I love you, I go WC, OK?

Sir, we're really going to America,
aren't we?

In 3 days we'll be eating real Western
food in Beverly Hills

The game's up, it's the cops

What, the cops?

Sir, what do we do now?

Don't lose your cool

We surrender, right?

Give me thirty seconds

Are you mad? Scram!

Lee Jong-sae, you are surrounded

Abandon your weapons and surrender

Surrender now and you will be treated
leniently within the limits of the law

I repeat, surrender

Surrender now and you will be treated
leniently within the limits of the law


Resist and we cannot guarantee your life

It is not too late, abandon your weapons
and surrender

We repeat, we repeat,

Hey, Do-suk

Slap me in the face, not too hard

This must be a dream,
that didn't hurt at all

Lee Jong-sae, genius, cannot go down
this way

I can't be eliminated in a third-class
railroad car

without anybody seeing the masterpiece

over which I labored so many sleepless

All geniuses die young,
but I cannot die yet

No, I cannot die

Do-suk, I want you
to break through the siege

I'll cover you from behind

Let's meet at Dock 33 at 10pm

- Good luck
- No, I'm going to surrender

Don't you want to become
a world-famous star?


I'd rather be a barber

I'm going to give myself up

You know you're going to get killed,

Do you think they'll let you live
if you give yourself up?

You're a robber and a murderer

No! They said they would let me go
if I turned myself in

It's you who turned us in!
Didn't you, fatty?

Stop calling me fatty!

Lee Jong-sae, this is all your fault,
you creep

Lying about making me an actor
when I was just minding my own business

I got my eyes done because of you,
it really hurt

I sold my shop because of you

I've never missed a single
reserves training session

I even have a plaque from the district
office saying "Best Barber"

I'm going to turn myself in

Moon Do-suk

I can forgive you for turning yourself in

I can forgive you for calling me a creep


However I cannot forgive you for betraying
a man's promise

The only thing we can do now is duel

When I say "Go," each of us takes ten steps

and then we turn around and shoot

A duel must have a judge

so Sun-young, you be the judge

Count from one to ten


Now, go










He's crazy

They're all crazy

Stark raving mad

Oh, if only this was a dream

If only this was a dream

Ah... Is everything we see
but a wakingdream

or does it merely appear
like a waking dream?

These flies

There was a story on the world news
a while ago

Some pilot on a light aircraft in Paris

was threatening to fly
into a control tower

When they asked what his reason was

he said it was for personal reasons

I know, right

It takes all sorts to make a world

Produced by Lee Tae-won

Directed by Lee Myung-Se

Written by Lee Myung-Se
and Bae Chang-ho

Ahn Sung-ki

Hwang Cine

Bae Chang-ho

Chon Moo-song

Guest starring Kim Se-jun
and Son Chang-min

Cinematography by You Young-gil

Lighting by Cha Jeong-nam

Music by Kim Soo-chul

Recording by Lee Young-gil

Editing by Kim Hyun

Dresser: Chae Hoon

Hair and Makeup: Cho Kyung-bok

Stills: Yang Ki-ju

Photography: Koo Bon-chang

Props: Kim Tae-uk,

Special effects: Kim Chol-seok

Production design: Do Yong-u

Recording assistants:
Kim Won-yong, Kim Dong-ui

Negative cutting: Kwon Mi-suk

Props assistant: Jang Suk-bum

Special effects assistant: Kim Baek-jin

Lighting assistants: Ham Hyung-suk, Lee Suk-hwan,
Kim Chang-sun, Chon Sang-hyuk

Camera assistants: Kim Myung-su, Kim Sung-bok,
Kim Hyung-gu, Lee Byung-ho

Assistant directors:
Gu Im-seo, Oh Seuk-keun

Continuity: Choi Eun-sil

Production manager: Chon Yung-haeng

Assistant production manager:
No Pyung-cheol

Cho Ju-mi, Ju Ho-sung, Choi Jong-won, Chu Bong,
Cho Chul-nam, Cho Sun-muk, Lee Hae-ryong, Park Bu-yang

Yang Il-min, Jeong Young-guk, Cho Yun-jin, Na Kap-sung,
Park Yong-pal, Kim Kyung-ran, Shin Chan-il, Park Ye-suk

Ahn Jin-su, Yu Min-suk

Mixing: Hanyang Studio

Film Processing: Korean Film Council