Fearless (2020) - full transcript

A teen gamer is forced to level up to full-time babysitter when his favorite video game drops three superpowered infants from space into his backyard.


Alpha Base, still no sign of the creature.

Captain Lightspeed, our trackers show
that Cruncher is right behind you.

Negative Alpha Base. Believe me,
if it was right on top of me, I'd know.

It's right on top of me!

I prepared you a light lunch.

Here you go, chubby.

Is that a muffin-top I see?

Ugh! Forget weapons.
I should've brought some breath mints.

But you can start flossing with this.

Or not.

Ooh! Ugh!

Time to wake up the babies.

Wake up the babies?

Oh, cool.

Whenever they refer to weapons as babies,
you know it's gonna be sick.

Dude, are you kidding me?

You're at the second to last level
of Planet Master.

Nobody's ever made it this far.

That's why my screen name is Fearless
and not Buckethead.

You've gotta come up with a better name
than Buckethead.

Why?
His head is an empty bucket.

- Shut your face.
- Watch the tail.

- Watch it.
- The spikes are poisonous.

Let the man concentrate.

Yeah, you're talking to the guy who jumped
a rocket cycle over Apocalypse Canyon.

Okay, let's wake up the babies.
What could they be?

Sonic blast cannons?
Plasma laser disintegrators?

Molten molecule melters?

Welcome to Bring Your Children
to Work Day.

- Real... babies?
- This has gotta be a joke.

What do these babies have,
superpower puke?

I climbed to the top
of the toughest video game ever made

just to change diapers and sing lullabies?

All right, kids, let's see if you remember
what Daddy's been teaching you

after nap time.

Bah! Ah!

- Little bigger than a salad fork, buddy.
- Ah!

Ah, you'll get there.

Mm-ah! I...

Trust me, kids, when you get bigger,
so will your powers.

Watch Daddy.

Ah!

Can we blow something up?
These babies are boring.

They'll cost me the mission. Isn't there
a space stroller I can put these kids in?

You hit that final level.
You're a gamer god!

Call me Fearless.

Nothing can stop me now.

Nothing!

Oh, except her.

- Hey, Mom.
- Hi, sweetie. Just checkin' in.

I wanna make sure you're not playing
video games while we're gone all weekend.

- That's ridiculous.
- And I'm reminding you

that your science project is due
in two weeks.

- Your partner still coming over tonight?
- Yup.

- This guy's a monster.
- What?

Uh, it's a monster homework assignment,
and I'm on it.

Make sure he fills out
the college application!

I will, I just have to, uh, finish,
a couple more things.

- Like another video game!
- I'm... That's not what I'm doing at all.

We should go.
Dad's giving the keynote in a few minutes,

and you know how he gets gassy

- when he gets nervous.
- Okay, TMI.

- Enjoy the weekend. Don't worry about me.
- Okay. Bye, sweetie.

- Honey?
- Yup, me too, bye.

Okay, let's finish this beast.

Death by geyser? It's a rough way to go.

And cue the music,
that sweet sound.

Ooh, there we go. I'm victor.

Captain Lightspeed.
In my way once again.

Dr. Arcannis.

Aha. Arcannis.

- This is the guy I wanna take out.
- Shoot him, man.

He looks like asparagus.

So pathetic, using your children
to fight your battles for you.

They'll probably grow up
just like their father.

I bet you wonder what that's like.

This is far from over, Captain.

I will never stop until I obliterate you
from the universe

and conquer every planet in my path.

You can make
all the deadly threats you want.

But you don't have superpowers,
and you never will.

This isn't over, Lightspeed.

Wherever heroes are needed,
we'll be there.

I'll have all your powers and more

when I take it to the next level.

You're about to get
to the final level.

- That's crazy!
- Insane!

This is big.

Fearless is about
to become a household name.

But first,
I gotta get rid of these babies.

They're just gonna slow me down.

Let me see if I... Oh, here we go, Daycare.

Okay. Looks like I can drop them off
while they grow their powers.

And fill their diapers.

Let a babysitter change 'em,
not me.

Their powers are weak right now.

I'm hoping they can rest up
and grow them here.

I hate to let them out of my sight,

but I have a debriefing
with the Galactic Council.

- Mm-hmm.
- Their mother's at a weekend seminar:

"The Dos and Don'ts
of Battling Black Hole Scorpions."

- You got all of their snacks, right?
- Yes, Captain.

In case of emergency,
you can reach me using this.

- Got it.
- My interplanetary communicator.

- I've seen one before.
- Oh.

All right.

- There you... go.
- You can let go.

Ah.

Daddy loves you, baby.

Just remember that I'll always...
Okay, she's gone.

How do we get from
babysitting to winning this game?

Let's get back to blasting stuff.

I say skip all the cut
scenes and get to the action.

On second thought,
I don't wanna miss anything.

One of these babies might lay
an Easter egg. I don't know.

Good point. Smart move.
That's why you're number one and I'm...

- Two thousandth and ninety-eighth.
- Ouch. That hurt.

As their powers increase, we make sure
each baby gets a palladium pacifier.

This neutralizes their power,
so they don't use them, accidentally.

Of course, yes, I remember.

All of our playrooms are reinforced steel,
laser-repellent, flame-retardant,

earthquake-proof, radiation-proof.

Oh, and tinkle-proof.

- Fleech.
- Ah!

Focus.

It's time to steal some babies.

And no, you may not eat them.

Aw.

Come on.

Ah.

Huh.

Eh?

Here.

Titus.

I can only hope
you're as strong as your father.

Umm.

Ugh!

Xander.

Creates anything he imagines.

Just imagine.

Mmm.

Kira. The girl child
of Captain Lightspeed.

- You may be the most powerful of all.
- Mmm.

You fool!

I love you. You're my best fri...

Shhh.

He just stole the babies.
Wow, this is heating up.

- Watch out for traps.
- I gotta wrap this up soon.

Melanie is coming over.
We gotta work on our science project.

- Melanie. She's fire.
- You're lucky.

She's really smart too.
I got Lunch Room Louise. Ugh!

With any luck Melanie will
do the project for me.

- Sorry, I'm out. Dinner time.
- Me too.

- {\an8}Text me when it gets good.
- Later guys.

I'm with you.
No way I'm missing this.

Finally. Back to TheObsidian.

Yes. This is gonna be tight!

Ah.

Hmm.

Fleech.

Hook up the subjects to The Extrapolator.

This chair's all sweaty
and... moist.

Captain Lightspeed. You look distraught.

Arcannis. You filth!

You took my children!
If you touch one hair...

Please. Spare me
your needless declarations and warnings.

I just called to thank you
for giving me the idea, Captain.

"You don't have superpowers,
and you never will."

But what if I found a way?

You see,
with my new Extrapolator, I have.

And who better to give them to me
than your defenseless offspring?

You've always been jealous of my powers.
Daddy issues?

- What?
- Your dad took over 20

or 30 planets before I locked him up.

And you? Hang on,
let me do the math. Zero.

I'll conquer all of my father's planets
and more.

Somebody's a little obsessed.

Obsessed? Obsessed? How dare you!

You sit on your golden throne

high above the rest of us.

I wasn't born with a silver spoon
in my mouth. Huh.

But now I will make my own spoon.

A spoon that will crush you all.

- That's a pretty big spoon.
- It's not a real spoon, Lightspeed!

Wee.

Oh, but how the tide has turned.

I will harvest your babies' powers,

and then nothing can stop me
from conquering any planet I wish.

Ooh.

My master plan is in motion,

every piece is in place

as your angelic children,
peacefully slumbering,

unaware of their contribution
to my unstoppable, diabolical powers.

Ah.

Yeah.

I have anticipated
even the slightest error,

every detail, every precise calculation
in my favor.

Eh!

Ta ta.

Oh.

I'd love to exchange more deadly threats,
but I must get the little ones to my lair.

- So much power to consume, so little time.
- No...!

Wow.

Welcome aboard.

Wow.

Launch code accepted.

Please hang on.

Uh-oh. Warning.

Final level.

Do you accept the consequences?
That's the weirdest thing I've ever seen.

That's freaky.

Ah, it's all hype.

They just put that in there to scare me.
Nice try.

Time for Fearless to become a legend.

Cool. There's nothing like flying
through a wormhole.

Worm hole.

This calls for more caffeine.

Hear that.
I'm gonna go eat a pie.

Okay.

Oh, not now.

Hang on.

Okay, you don't have to knock so hard.
I heard the bell the first time.

Jeez Louise.

- General Blazerhatch.
- I'll take a coffee, black.

What's the skinny on our UFO?

The object came from outside
Earth's atmosphere at 1900 hours.

We're picking up vital signs
from inside the object.

Sweet God in heaven.

I guess I'll take that coffee... to go.

No! No!

Imbecile.

You pile of worthless skin cells.

You only had to get them
into The Extrapolator.

Let's go hunting.

Melanie. Hey. Hi. Uh, come on in.

I'm not interrupting anything, am I?

No. I was just saving the world.

You know, uh, Planet Master?

I don't really play video games.

Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal online.
Fearless, that's my gamer tag.

Hmm. Yeah. I spend my time studying.
Really focused on graduating right now.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Me too.

I figure if we work on this 3 hours
a night for 2 nights,

we'll have this project done this weekend.

Or 2 hours a night over the next week.
I have both schedules here.

Wh... Whoa, that's a lot of scheduling.
Did you schedule any bathroom breaks?

Of course. Twice an hour.

This is 30 percent of our grade, Reid.
I'm taking it seriously.

So let's get to brainstorming.

- I'm sure you have some ideas.
- Sure.

Like...

There's solar power.

Uh, the electricity of light.

Uhhh. Arcannis effect on light speed.

Space travel!

I was thinking
advanced geometric telecommunications.

Or rocket boots.

You wanna make rocket boots?

These are just rough ideas. Oh.

Ah.

Wow.

Mmm.

Uh-huh.

See, this... this is why
I'm not a fan of partner projects.

I'm usually the only one
who does any work.

I... I... Um...

This is gonna be a long night.
Might as well take our first break now.

- Where's your bathroom?
- First door down the hall.

Can you at least crack a notebook
while I'm gone?

Write down one idea.

I guess she's not gonna
do the whole project for me.

What?

Huh.

That was weird.

Oh! Whoa! Whoa! Oh-huh!

Oh.

Baby. Here from the game. Okay…

Uh, well,
this can't be actually happening.

Ah!

Huh.

Another one? Did they all come here?

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bu... Just stay.

- Ahh.
- Whoa. Oh, baby.

Whoa. Don't eat...

Um. Oh.

No, no, no, no. You can't be here.
This doesn't make sense.

Just put you back in the game. Uh.
Come on. Come on!

What is this? I found a baby in here.

What?

There are more?
When did you start babysitting?

They're not really... Here's the thing.

These babies are from Planet Master.

Stop with the jokes, Reid.
Whose kids are these?

It might be hard to believe,

but these are actually the children of…
Captain Lightspeed.

And he's in the video game.
They have super powers.

If you're trying to bail
on the science project, just say so.

I will figure this out.

Until I do, we can still work
on the project.

- I just have to keep them busy.
- And how are you gonna do that?

Okay, toys. You want toys. Here you go.

This is a shoe, and here is a ball.

Uh...

Uh, and this is a mouse.

Oh, what is... What's happening?

{\an8}What's this? Don't make that sound.
Noooo, no, no, no.

Oh, here, these usually work.

I'm gonna go find them something
more appropriate to play with.

Fine, great.

There's gotta be a cheat code
to delete you, or...

Where's the third one?

Oh, no, no, no, no, where'd he go? Okay.

Here. Uh, play with this.

Yup, that's a ball.

Yeah, you got it.

Look, I get it, you wanna... Oh!

And now your powers are getting stronger?
Please, not here.

Uh.

Oh. Hey, not the bookshelf. Get down.

Ah!

You do not throw a book at me, okay?
That's not a toy.

And you are a bad baby.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Oh!

Oh! No, no!

Ah!

What happened? Anybody hurt?

Just you. You gotta be more careful
around little kids.

- They're not just kids...
- You figure out what to do

with these babies. I'm gonna go work
in the kitchen and get something done.

Oh!

Laugh it up, you little space gremlins.

If I got you here, I'm gonna figure out
how to send you back.

Oh, shrimp. Okay...

Everything all right?

Um. Hey, kid, why don't you just...

Oh!

- Ah.
- Wow.

What are you trying to do in here?
Teach them professional wrestling?

No, I've been trying to tell you,

these babies are from Planet Master,
the video game.

I played the final level and somehow
broke the laws of time and space

and brought them... here.

Reid, I don't have time for this.

I came here to work.

- Can you just focus on...
- Put down the couch!

Put down what?

Fine. You wanna play games?

You can keep babysitting
or whatever this is.

I'm gonna ask Mrs. Wilson
to assign me another partner.

- This isn't my fault. It's this game.
- You really need to grow up.

I'm not gonna let some slacker like you
crash my whole GPA.

Go back to your video games.

You seem to be more successful there
than you are in real life.

Ah!

Who threw the shoe?

Well, congratulations.

You ruined her night. You ruined my night.

You ruined half my house. Well done.

Oh yeah, give yourself a hand.

Ooh!

Uh-oh!

Video game babies.

Houston, we've lost
satellite 1187. Are you seeing…

Mission Control,
we are losing your signal, are you...

The second object just entered
the atmosphere. We're tracking it now.

Get me the Pentagon. I want the Air Force
ready to shake a big stick at this.

Someone hand me an important file.

- Put this on a clipboard.
- Yes, ma'am.

I want a clipboard handed to me
every 2 minutes.

Yes, ma'am.

I want this retyped
in bold Courier font, all caps.

Yes, ma'am.

When this chopper lands
and my black Cadillacs hit the ground,

I want a base camp waiting, gentlemen.

No bug-eyed moon man
is gonna probe the U.S. of A. On my watch.

Yes, ma'am.

Through a wormhole? From a video game?

I don't know how to explain it,
but we have to send these babies back

- into the game.
- We? There is no "we."

These kids would break
Mary Poppins in half.

Ah!

Hey.

You need to call animal control
or the police.

No cops. Last thing I need
is that phone call to my parents.

I'm outta here. You're on your own.
Are you crazy?

I can't handle this on my own!

Please help me. Just until I can send them
back where they came from.

Wrangling space babies was not part
of my schedule today, okay?

Hmm. You are pathetic.

I gotta call my parents.

Thank you.

Mom. Yeah, I know.

This big project just got...
a lot bigger than I thought.

Might go pretty late.

Okay. Bye!

What? Ew.

Uh. What's...

Oh, Titus.

Huh.

- Oh, smells so bad I can see it.
- That's pure human suffering.

I finally found
your secret lair, Arcannis.

Captain, careful.
Walking into that lair

is like walking into a seven layer
lasagne of death.

Then get me my bib.

I'm going in to get my babies back,
and it's about to get messy.

Nine against one?
That hardly seems fair.

Looks like you guys could use a recharge.

Game on.

Power up.

Hold it down.

Sorry. Did I cut you off?

Level up.

Thanks for the workout, guys.

Palladium? I've got no powers.

Surprise.

I'm not here right now.

And neither are your precious children.

Please, make yourself at home.

If your home is a maze
of merciless death traps!

I'm no good at mazes!

Ugh. Fleech.

So sorry, master.

Give me the scanner.

All right, then.

This blasted planet is thick
with interference.

Radio waves, satellite waves.

It's time for a little help
from my friends.

Hello, my darlings. Off you go.

Find my little runaways.

- Fleech, did you set this on stun?
- Ah.

Hm. Yes, you did.

The pod is close.

It appears we have landed on...

- Earth?
- Verr...

That's the name?

- Sounds like a stomach virus.
- Ew.

Or the name of a pet worm.

Or a type of mucous.

Uh. Yes. That's it.

When a Noglar squats in the woods...

it takes an "earth."

Ew. Bleurgh.

Uh.

Uhh.

Ugh.

Ah.

Oh. Wow.

Is this what I think it is?

- Oh.
- You evil scum.

I'm gonna blast you into the Jade Nebula
when I find you.

- Captain Lightspeed? Is that you?
- Who are you talking to?

It's the captain, you know?
Remember the... Oh.

This is Captain Darius Lightspeed,
Galactic Defense Commander.

Uh, this is Reid.
Senior, McKinley High School.

What have you done with my children,
Reid Senior McKinley High School?

I'll vaporize you where you stand!

Hold on. We're on the same side.
I've been on a hundred missions with you.

Shooting plasma falcons,
breaking out of gravity prison,

- remember the worm people?
- Is he wearing a Danskin?

It's called a uniform!

- Did I call at a bad time?
- Nothin' I can't handle.

Just another day on the job.

Don't change the subject.
Do you have my babies or not?

I do have them.
They've destroyed my home.

You need to pick them up ASAP.

Reid, no other mission
is more important than this.

I need you to keep my kids safe.

Use their palladium pacifiers
to neutralize their powers.

Right. Okay.

There's more. If you have the babies,
Arcannis is coming for you.

Arcannis, who?

Dr. Arcannis.

The most devious criminal mind
in the galaxy.

Yup, that's the guy.

Looks like the Grinch
got some bad plastic surgery.

If he gets a hold of my children,
he will take their powers as his own.

And the first planet he conquers
will be yours.

Okay. I'm out.

I'm afraid you've both been marked.

- I don't wanna be marked.
- Well, you are.

If I can track you, so can he.
He probably already knows where you are.

Give me a second to trace your signal,
and I'll be able to locate you.

I can't be marked. I've got my own plans.
I wanna go to college.

I wanna get married.

I still have a $200 Sephora gift card
I've never spent, and now I'm marked.

- Dada.
- No, no, no, don't!

- No!
- No!

He's gone.

How's he gonna find us now?

Reid. We've gotta get out of here.

Uh-huh.

And don't think this gets you out
of our science project.

I need an ETA on the surveillance truck
and an ETA on lunch.

No onions on the burger this time.

No... onions.

Ah, the smell of ripe diaper.

- They were here, all right.
- Yeah.

Looks just like my lab.

Huh.

Uh.

They are getting stronger.

We must find my little runaways quickly.

We are so close. I can smell them.

I will find you.

Do you mind?

We have to call our parents
and the police. This has gone far enough.

We can't call anyone. You heard
Lightspeed, Arcannis is tracking us.

He could be tracking our phones.
You don't wanna put your family

in danger too, do you?
No! No kicking, please, space babies.

Do not let them tear this car apart.

Let's find some music?

♪ All night All night ♪

Okay. They love Lionel Richie.

♪ All night ♪

- Seriously?
- Hey. He's a national treasure.

These guys get it.

♪ All night long... ♪

What is this?

♪ Oh, yeah All night ♪

Oh no.

Okay, everybody be cool.
You babies, be cool.

You be cool.

Maybe we just hand these kids over
to them.

Are you kidding? Have you heard
what the military does to aliens?

♪ Let the music take control ♪

- Can you cut the music?
- But he's a national treasure.

Where're you kids going today?

- Camping!
- Road trip. Uh...

- Camping road trip, to go camping.
- What he said.

Is the air safe out here?

Just a precaution.
We'll ask the questions.

We're checking cars
for anything peculiar.

Nothin' peculiar here.

Uh, very, very normal car.
We're all normal here. How are you?

- We're gonna need to look in the trunk.
- No problem.

Uh, nice mask.

Any relation to Darth?

You packed a toaster.

I've never been camping.
I had no idea what I'd need.

You've got roller skates here too.

I really didn't think it through
on a lot of this. I see that now.

Ba-ba. Ooh.

Is that a pool noodle?

Uhh... you never know.

Oh.

So, uh, you're not much of a talker,
are you?

Huh. Huh.

- Hey! Stop!
- Bye-bye.

Get back here with my jeep!
Get back here! Hey!

Oh, we are so going to jail.

Oh.

Huh.

No, no, no!
I don't wanna die this way!

No! Huh! I don't wanna die this way! No!

No!

No!

Oh.

What's going on here?

- How...
- What happened?

- We've gotta get back on the road.
- There was a bubble.

You saw a bubble?

I was in a bubble. A big purple,
a big purple balloon.

That doesn't make sense.
Does that make sense?

Nope, no sense.

I was in a big bubble. I'm serious.

It's those babies. One of 'em took my car.

He chased me.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, a baby stole your car?

Is your mask on too tight, Ronnie?

No. I mean... I don't... I don't think so.

Whoa, baby.

Titus...

put the car down.

Yes. Now.

No, don't throw it!

Well, he put it down.

No cookie for you, Titus! No cookie!

I'm so sorry. Have a nice day.

Okay, let's turn up that music.

- We gotta get off the road.
- I know the perfect place.

Mother of all things holy.

Our sweet green Earth
is living on borrowed time.

My guess puts these creatures
at six, seven feet tall.

Some kind of space predator.

Multiple arms, possibly tentacles.

Claws of a wolverine.

They probably shoot spider babies
right outta their face.

General.

- Neighbors saw a car leave two hours ago.
- Get me that plate.

Put that in a bag with a number on it.
Somebody hand me a clipboard.

General, we got a hit
at one of the checkpoints.

Something they're calling
super freaky-deaky.

Define freaky-deaky, Private.

- Babies. Babies. Babies.
- Babies? Babies? Babies?

What do you mean, babies?

Super-powered alien babies.
Cute but deadly.

They... probably shape-shifted
into the form of their human victims.

Put out an APB, all channels!

We're looking for infants...

of mass destruction.

You got anything in your date planner
about surviving in the woods?

You're talking to Camp Nogiwa's
"Camper of the Year," gamer boy.

Come on, Fearless. Let's set up camp.

Hey. How about a hand?
Aren't you supposed to be super strong?

Ooh. Uh. Da, da, da, da!

Oh, no, baby, don't...! Uh...

But please tell me
you brought some toilet paper.

Well, I've got some drive-through
receipts in the car.

I was supposed to go to Red Lobster
with my girlfriends tonight.

- Are you gonna be able to fix that thing?
- I'd better. Or I'm gonna miss Crabfest.

Besides, it's just a machine.
There has to be a way.

Uh, just seems like we're a little
out of our league here, y'know?

Well, all we can do is try, y'know?
Put in some effort?

We need to get this done,
so we can get back to our science project.

Think that brain of yours can solve
something other than a video game?

Ooh!

Hey, little guy.

Uh, I wonder what you're thinkin'.
I wonder...

Eurgh.

You said it, Titus.

Uh! Where have they gone?

Oh! You got me.

Hi.

Radio repair.

Rainbows and Bears.

Ooh-ooh-ooh.

Oh, come on.

Quack, quack! Ooh!

Ah!

Ah!

Whoa!

Oh!

Titus! Do not drop a tree on your sister.

- He did that on his own.
- He's really getting better.

These pieces are so tiny.
I can't see what I'm doing.

Let me try something.

Xander, can you make this?

Make big ones.

Huh.

Oh, man. He's doing it.

That does help.

Look. Spin this one, it fits here.

- Okay. I see it.
- There we go.

Pretty good, Xander.

You did it. Genius.

Did you have any doubt?

Thanks.

Eight, nine, ten. Yup, still got 'em all.

Captain's log.
I continue to wander this maze like a rat.

It's endless. Dead end.

Huh.

Ooh!

Or not.

Captain's log. I hate mazes.

Bling?

You gotta be kidding me.

You gotta be kidding!

This is our best vantage point
to scan the entire town.

Access the drones.

Phew!

Are you listening to me?

I listen to you all day,
Mother. Do you ever listen to me?

What?

That's a grande mocha
half-caf macchiato, no whip, no foam.

…3, and 4.
And 1, and 2, and 3...

Blah.

Yo yo. Takin' your calls.
It's your boy, UP NYC on The Noize 105 FM.

Hit me up. Tell me what you wanna hear.

Hey now, don't be shy. You on The Noize.

Who's this?

This is Dr. Arcannis,
overlord of cosmic domination.

Yo, whaddup, Einstein?
What song you wanna play on the hit list?

I don't have time for this.

"I Don't Have Time For This"
by Dreadlock Killah.

- That's not what I mean.
- "That's Not What I Mean"

by MC Saltshaka.

I am looking for babies.

"Looking For My Baby" by JJ Squash.

Stop this foolishness.

You will soon be my slaves,
and this planet will be a wasteland!

Congratulations, my man. You just
requested the new jam of the week.

- How is that even possible?
- "You Will Be My Slaves,

And This Planet
Will Be My Wasteland" by DJ Euripides.

At least we put this thing back
together, but it's still not working.

- Maybe it's a power thing?
- The signal is really weak.

We need to, like,
hijack a satellite for this.

Use some NASA-level gear.

Let me make a call to NASA.
I'll get right on it.

You're not half bad at this stuff
when you put your mind to it.

Uh, thank you?

Maybe it's all the fresh air and trees
and bugs and going potty in the woods.

Opens up my mind a bit.

Wow. Look at you.
Acknowledging there's a real world.

Maybe you're not
a complete lost cause after all.

Maybe not.

So... any plans after we graduate,

or are you just gonna float around
in virtual reality?

At least in the game world,
you don't get called names, flunk a class,

or get turned down for prom.
It's all about the fun.

Here in the real world,
I've got my fingers crossed for MIT.

Majoring in biochemical engineering.

Wow. You've got it all planned out.

Well, sure. Even those ducks
are charting a course, Reid.

They don't just drift
wherever the current goes.

Is that all you're gonna do? Just drift?

I'm sick of working on this.
Time to work on a sandwich.

Hope you like pastrami.

You guys like pastrami?

Little pastrami on rye. Got some kraut
and mustard. I'm making Reubens.

Hey, don't get cranky.

Look at these two guys.
They're not cranky. Look.

Hi, Mr. Spoon.
That's Dr. Spoon from space.

Get away from me.

I have a PhD!

How about, um...

I'm Colonel Mustard. What's the ruckus?

Please, no fighting.
I'm just a moist towelette.

Uh-huh.

Hm.

Don't play with Dr. Spoon
like that. You're gonna hurt him.

Hey, let's play peekaboo.

- This guy loves peekaboo.
- Yeah.

Peek. Peek.

Peek. Peekaboo, huh?

- Don't scare him.
- Here I go.

- You'll set his powers off.
- Hmm.

If you can't see my face, where am I?

- You got too big.
- Peekaboo!

- I told you not to scare him!
- Okay, everybody in the car!

Captain's log: More maze.

This part is different.
Maybe it's a way out.

Nope. Just the opposite.

That sounds...

alive.

Looks like Arcannis's monster
had some babies.

That's fitting. Killed by babies.

Very ironic.

At least he leaves a trail.

Xander! Xander!

Xander, don't move.

Ah!

It's okay, Xander.

Hey! What...

The driver's still in there!

- Hey! The door is stuck!
- Wait, hold on. One second, okay?

Hey!

Good boy, Titus. Okay, hold on.

Oh, why won't it...

budge!

I'm okay.
How much milk is that kid drinking?

Look at that.

These babies could be heroes.

Yay, Titus.

Ah.

- Or not.
- Uh-oh.

What was in there?

Just a lot of priceless artifacts
from a museum.

You know, 17th century Ming Dynasty,
things that can never be replaced.

- And my house keys were in there.
- It's not that long of a drop.

I'm sure everything's fine.

Okay, pacifiers for everyone.

We better get outta here.

Oh no.

Keep your human skin suits on
and your hands where we can see them.

Stand down, alien menace!

I'm not an alien menace.

That's just what an alien menace
would say.

You shoot any spider babies
outta your face, we will take you out.

Oh.

Aw.

Do not be swayed by their cute demeanor
and chubby cheeks!

Quarantine this area right now.

No!

Careful. Keep away
from their mouth and hands.

Ew. We've got saliva.

Get a stool sample!
Send those diapers to the CDC!

They're just babies! Don't hurt them!

They like Lionel Richie.
Mostly his greatest hits.

Well, you've tested human.

I just need to know
why you're working for them.

This is a big misunderstanding.

All I did was accidentally open up
a wormhole by playing a video game.

Planet Master? Do you know it?

And who are you calling on this?

The Russians? The French?
The French Canadians?

The Canadian Russians? Martian communists?

No! But there's someone else
you should be worried about.

I can't even believe she told you that.

She did. And then she says to me
that she wants to see other people.

Ouch, that's cold.

So she's single?

What? Did you seriously just say she...

Say what, Nate?

Nate.

HQ...

Hold that thought.

I'm confused here.

We tracked an alien pod to you two,

but all our background searches
come up with are Red Lobster, Sephora,

What?
No, that's, uh, I've never heard of...

In all my days as a Marine, a Navy Seal,

LAPD, FBI,
and a Girl Scout Leader of the Year,

I've never heard such a load of...

General, we have intruders.
They're moving to...

Moving where?

Come back, soldier!

Perimeter, report!

Until I know what's going on,
you will do nothing and go nowhere.

- Understood?
- Let us help.

Do nothing, go nowhere.

Who does she think she is?
They can't keep us in here.

- There's gotta be a way out of...
- Shhh.

- I don't hear anything.
- Exactly.

It's him, Dr. Arcannis.

We're going for a little ride.

Fleech, get them
in the sport utility vehicle.

Mark this day
in your planet's history, hoomans.

My little helpers are about to make me...

...the most powerful being
in the universe!

What is this?

They're gone.

- What? Sh... Should we go after them?
- And do what?

I saw the warning. But I didn't listen.

I just wanted to win.

This isn't a game. It's real.

The whole Earth is doomed,
and it's my fault.

- Come on. You are Fearless.
- No, don't call me that.

I'm not Fearless. I'm useless.

Just my luck. They're teethin'.

I'm not as tasty as I look.
Who am I kidding? I'm probably delicious.

No use fighting it.
There's no way out of this one.

I'm... I'm never gonna see my babies again.

I can plan a Red Cross food drive,
a homecoming dance,

I can raise $8,000 to save the elephants.

But this?
I'm... I'm all out of ideas, Reid.

This would be so much easier
if it was a video game.

Wait a minute.

What if this was a video game?

What would you do?

I don't know.
I'd look around for tools, for power-ups.

I wouldn't give up.

You know what? I've been living
my whole life through a screen.

What good is it being Fearless
in a fake world?

It's time to start being Fearless
out here, where it counts.

Wow. Somebody just got off the couch.

Let's find a way outta here, huh?

Wait a minute. I can't believe
I didn't think of it before.

That's a sat phone.

It's a super powerful walkie-talkie.

They link to satellites. NASA-level gear.

It could boost our signal.
You can fix the communicator.

Yes! Now let's go stop Grinchface.

Game on.

General. You're gonna have to trust me.
We're the good guys,

- and we're gonna stop the bad guys.
- If we can catch them in time.

Whoa! The Obsidian.

It's even cooler in person.

You can take a selfie later!

Watch the road!

Whoa! Shrimp!

Oh! Whoa!

Didn't you say
you've ridden a motorcycle before?

- Yes, in Planet Master.
- What?

Okay, it's now or never.

Sorry, this is a lot different
than a rocket bike.

Here goes.

I think we're on.

Hello? Come in, Captain.
Captain, can you hear us?

This is Lightspeed.

Good to hear your voice again.

- We got him!
- Yeah!

- Arcannis has your babies.
- What?

They're on The Obsidian,
but we won't let them get away.

I can finally pinpoint
your location.

Do not let Arcannis absorb
those babies' powers, or Earth is doomed.

Okay, we can do this.

I played every level.
I know every inch of that ship.

Arcannis is no match for my expert...

Oh! Swallowed a bug.

- Are we gonna catch them?
- Yes, we will.

If we land on top of it, we can get
inside through the engine intake ports.

Wait, what?

- Trust me, I've done this before.
- Not in real life.

Get ready to jump.

I will never be ready to jump!

Or we can also go in this way.

If Fearless isn't giving up,
then neither am I.

I just need a way out.

Baby Bottle Bonus.

Wherever heroes are needed.

Fastest nipple in the galaxy. Take that!

Time to pick up the kids.

Oh my God.

What? Huh? What?

Sweet George Washington.

Looks like those kids were right.

- I need birds in the air now!
- Yes, ma'am.

No lobster-headed space invader
gets a drop on me.

- Yes, ma'am.
- If he thinks a ray gun

and pointy collar makes him
king of the moon men, well, ha.

He's never tangled with the human spirit.

- Okay, I'm done.
- Yes, ma'am.

Wow.

- Da.
- Hold on.

Oooh.

Good.

Connect the chairs to the machine.

The absorption chamber is ready.

Their little powers
have blossomed so much.

This will be an excellent harvest.

The isolated gene combinations
from their DNA

will be fed directly into this implant.

Activate The Extrapolator.
I will be in my cocoon.

Uh...

No, go to the Settings menu,
then Preferences, then Power Level.

Not Tools! Power Level!

Da da da da da da da! Da!

Ooh.

Yes.

I can feel it.

So what's the plan?

You find the babies,
I'm gonna stop this ship.

And how do we do that?

Simple.

All right, so I've memorized
the scheme of this place.

You're gonna keep going
through this tunnel,

then you're gonna end up at a bunch
of scary mechanical objects.

Just gotta get through 'em.

- That sounds dangerous.
- It is. It is.

Do not touch anything, okay?

Go to Lab A, not Lab B,

because that's the one where he's growing
the monsters and mutating the animals.

I think there's a two-headed squid
in there with swords for hands.

- It's okay. You'll be fine.
- I think we should switch jobs.

We can't. I'm the only one
who knows how to get past security lasers

and the security drones

and the security bees,

which is not a technical term,
they're just bees.

Are you serious?

But that's a lot of bees.

I'll sabotage the flight controls,

then I'll cut through the torture chamber
and the racquetball court,

and I... I don't know what else, uh...

Yeah?

- I hate this plan.
- See you in five.

We're gonna laugh about this, I promise.

- The aircraft is in sight.
- All right Jersey, stay focused.

Let's keep it tight.
There are civilians on board.

Let's fire a warning shot.

Huh?

This is by order
of the U.S. government.

You will follow us to a landing sight
or be forced down.

- He's out of control!
- Break away! Break away!

This guy's not coming down
quietly. We gotta take this thing down.

General,
we are awaiting missile authorization.

No, no, no, no! No!
Oh, my gosh. I found you guys.

I fear for my life,
but this is way better than a game.

Whoa.

Ooh.

All right, hands up!

Huh. Ah.

All of them...

Where I can see them.

That is all of them, right?

Land this ship, now.

Whoa! Oh! Yeah. More of that.

Holy guacamole! This thing's a lot of fun.

Ha-ha! Whoa!

You found them!

So good news, bad news: The fastest way
to land this ship is to crash it.

We've gotta get some place safe.
Here, take them.

Hold fire!
Someone's taking it down from the inside.

Whoa. Oh.

Oh, no. No.

We've gotta escape.
Escape in a pod of some kind, maybe...

Oh.

Hang on to something!

Your pod has been deployed.

Um... thanks.

The power courses through my veins.

Better, stronger,

supercharged.

The poopy diaper just hit the fan.

And poop just got real.

Now that I've been freed from that
insipid game by that foolish boy,

I shall conquer your planet.

You'll have to go through me first.

I see you brought an army.

So did I.

Fire!

You are insects.

And you will be destroyed like insects.

Today I declare myself King of Earth.

Ugh.

First order of business,
we are changing that name.

Oh, this is bad.
There's gotta be a way to stop him.

- We've gotta get these babies to safety.
- What's wrong with them?

I don't know.

Ever since they were in that machine,
they've been totally out of it.

Keep them safe. I have an idea.

Wait. Reid, are you crazy?

Be careful!

I still don't wanna die like this!
No! No! No!

What is that horrible...

You mock me
with your vehicle of frozen confections?

Oh!

Ah!

No!

Ah, the boy who's been in my way.

You've got what you want now.
We're no threat to you.

Just leave. Go master another planet.

Ah. There they are.

I wondered where the little saplings
had gone to.

I'm sorry, but I think it's time I end
the Lightspeed lineage for good.

I won't let you touch them!

I will destroy anyone I please.

Especially those babies.

Now step aside!

- Not gonna happen, green beans.
- Huh?

I made this mess,
and it's up to me to clean it up.

And if that means standing in your way,
no matter what…

That's what I'm gonna do.

Wow, that was quite a speech.
What are you gonna do, gamer boy?

Shoot me down with a speech?

It was inspiring.

I begin my reign with a show of force.

Ah.

An example to those
who would dare cross me.

Any more pathetic attempts
at being a hero will be crushed.

Crushed to dust.

So you will learn the meaning

of being fearless.

Ah!

What?

Kira!

Ah! It's not possible!

She's breaking through the barrier!

Wow.

Ah!

Oh! Whoa!

Reid!

Whoa!

- Titus?
- Goo-goo-ga.

The voice of Vin Diesel.

- High five.
- High five.

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like ♪

♪ Yeah, have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

♪ Help me when I focus
Tonight I'm feeling fearless... ♪

They got 'em on the run people! Attack!

You glow, girl.

Wee!

Yeah, Kira!

♪ They hatin' on me
Can't stress you ♪

♪ We celebratin'
It's a magic moment ♪

♪ And the moment sit like magic on it ♪

♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like ♪

♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is... ♪

Wow. A natural-born gamer.

Hop in. Let's do some damage.

Yeah you better run. Little toad.

Oh, no! Make it stop!

Ah!

She can just do everything now, can't she?

There's something on Arcannis's neck.

If we take that out,
I think we take his power.

- She doesn't understand.
- Yes, she does.

You've got your daddy's eyes.
And they shoot lightning death blasts.

So just remember what he taught you.
You got this.

Oh!

Ah!

Ah!

Huh? Ah!

Ooh!

No!

Yes!

Bullseye.

I can feel the power leaving.

You can't steal superpowers.

No! No!

Noooo!

No!

Better late than never!

Boy, that's a horrible catchphrase.
Strike that.

Captain! You're here!

Hmm.

You know what, frog face?
You made me miss Crabfest.

I haven't missed Crabfest in seven years.

So I'm not in a good mood at all.

Hey, she's good. What game is she from?

No, she's all real.

I'm here to assist, general.

These must be your kids.

Seems like things are… well in hand.

Ooh!

Ooh! Ee!

Where's Kira?

She's the one without any...

powers.

Dada!

Hey. You got 'em.

Dada!

- They grow up so fast.
- Hmm.

Where's the pacifier?
It's time to calm them down.

Um... no pacifiers.
Does anyone have any Lionel Richie?

I got a Commodores album in my car.

Not the same thing, private.

You! Play some Lionel Richie
like your life depended on it.

Wouldn't be the first time.

♪ All night All night ♪

♪ All night long ♪

♪ All night All night ♪

♪ All night long ♪

♪ All night All night ♪

♪ All night long... ♪

- We don't need an ambulance.
- How about some blankets?

- What for?
- I don't know.

We just always give you blankets.

You know, this was a crazy weekend,

but it might've been
the best one of my life.

Really? It wasn't on your schedule.

I think you kinda owe me a crab dinner.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

All right. You got it.

But we still never got
to that science project.

Hey, you two.
I think you might have dropped this.

Or maybe we did.

Wow.

It is perfect. And nothing like I planned.

Thank you, Fearless.

You saved the day when I couldn't.
Not everyone would've done that.

A few days ago, I wouldn't have done that.
The real world is a whole new level.

I couldn't have gotten here
without help from Buckethead.

Wait a second. Buckethead?

Oh. You guys know each other?

- What's up, Reid?
- What? How?

You know I got your back.

Who do you think
got him his Baby Bottle Bonus?

I guess we've finished
the final level together, Elliot.

We sure did. We did it together.

Fearless and the Finisher.

Bye, Xander.

Think happy thoughts.

Titus. One for the road?

Oh.

And you.

Oh.

- Hmm.
- I'll miss you.

Ah.

Hang on to that, you two,
in case we need you again.

- Where you headed next?
- Wherever heroes are needed.

Can you believe we got an A+
on our science project?

That's a relief.

Otherwise my parents never would've
forgiven me for trashing the house.

And we finally got our date.

We really bent the laws of reality
this weekend.

What if we're just characters
in someone else's game?

I hardly know what's real anymore.

This? This is real enough for me.

Game on, Fearless!

Looks like we're taking it
to the next level.

♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like ♪

{\an8}♪ Yeah, have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

{\an8}♪ Help me when I fall
Yeah, tonight I'm feeling fearless ♪

{\an8}♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

{\an8}♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like, yeah ♪

♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

♪ Help me when I fall, yeah
Tonight I'm feelin' fearless ♪

{\an8}♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

{\an8}♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like, yeah ♪

{\an8}♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

{\an8}♪ Help me when I fall, yeah
Tonight I'm feelin' fearless ♪

♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like, yeah ♪

♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

♪ Help me when I fall, yeah
Tonight I'm feelin' fearless ♪

♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like, yeah ♪

{\an8}♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

♪ Help me when I fall, yeah
Tonight I'm feelin' fearless ♪

♪ Tonight could be the night of our lives
Yeah ♪

♪ Do-Don't be scared
I got just what you like, yeah ♪

♪ Have no fear
All you really gotta feel is ♪

♪ Help me when I fall, yeah
Tonight I'm feelin' fearless ♪

♪ Take a picture
It might last longer ♪

♪ When the DJ play the last song ♪

♪ Over ♪

♪ For the night ♪

♪ I hope your picture filled
With real homies ♪

♪ 'Cause real homies feel real homely ♪

♪ Till it's over ♪

♪ That's the life ♪

♪ Take a picture
It might last longer ♪

♪ When the DJ play the last song ♪

♪ Over ♪

♪ For the night ♪

♪ I hope your picture's filled
With real homies ♪

♪ 'Cause real homies feel real homely ♪

♪ Till it's over ♪

♪ That's the life ♪

Bye-bye.

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