Erotic Ghost Story III (1992) - full transcript

Please, sir
(Cheers!)

She is yours tonight

No, you first

Brother, here comes an easy prey!

He has a sword

Has he? I've got a saber too

What will you have, sir?

Just make a few dishes for me

Any inn in the vicinity, please?

Ma Ngai Slope is a secluded place

You can find a few haunted houses,
but not an inn.



Waiter, bring this customer a pitcher
of rice wine Okay

Please, sir

Now it depends on you. Take care

Master, you must be tired. This way, please.

What are you doing?

Master, a handsome guy like you must be romantic.

Come drink with me, come over

I can't drink, I can't

Bastard, how dare you hug my wife?

Your wife? I didn't

I see saw it. Don't deny!

Darling, he molested me

Darling, he touched me

What an impudent guy!



- Brothers, beat him!
- No problem!

What are you doing? Don't try anything foolish!

It's female

So you enjoy posing as a man,
Our leader will show you how to be a real man

What do you want? Let me go!

Brother, rape her!

Rape her!
Rape her!

Alright, I'll do it to fulfil you guys' demand.

Put her on the table

Rape her...

- Help! Help!
- Rape her...

- Let me go! Help...
- Rape her...

Put it on

I thought you'd hardhearted enough to ignore me.

I told you not to follow me

You won't be happy to be with me

Our marriage was one arranged before our birth

My dad made this promise.
You can marry him instead.

You're forsaking me! Let me die!

Are you crazy?

Only because you're forsaking me

Well, follow me, if you please

That's better

- Okay
- Let's go

Go in

Help, help!

Keep away, lousy dog, sick dog!

Keep away!

Please drive away that dog for me.
Thank you.

Go!

Thank you!

Who are you?

Shit! Put me near an oil lamp, quick!

Otherwise, I'm finished. Come on, quick!

Thank you!

Hurry up

Excuse me, please

Prajnaparamita, Prajnaparamita!

He's a monster!

Please don't misunderstand, benefactor

I'm not a monster, I'm a monk

You're a monk?

Buddha be praised! A devout heart
signifies the devout beliefs of a person.

Please don't stick to minor rites and costume.

In my opinion,
living is the most important issue of mankind

Have food, have fun and go freely

The rest are of no consequence

What's your priestly name, please?

How come you can transform
yourself into different size?

I am the Reverend Wick

I became a monk since childhood.
I am now responsible to guard the Wick Tower

Facing the lamp day and night is boring

and I have no one to chat with

I pour out my feelings to the lamps only

Real or imagined, the wick talked with me one day

He taught me the incantation that shrinks me

But I might get burnt to death

If the lamp burns out before I change back

Thank you

May I ask your names, please?

I'm Chu Chung, and she's Lau...

Ha-wai

Greeting, Mr Chu, Mr Lau

Please don't stand on ceremony.
Call us by name is fine.

You keep him company while I go in to change

Mr Lau has a sense of humor.
Let's go over there for a chat

- Please
- Please

Sit down, please

Abbot, what you told us just now...

Life likes a wick. It's gone, once burnt out

Compared with the centuries-old universe,
life's a speck only, rights?

Forget it now.
When you reach my age, you'll understand

Abbot, are you all right?

When were you born?

The 9th day, 5th moon, year of the Rat

Between 7 to 9 in the morning?

How do you know?

No wonder! Congratulations!

Your fate is full of masculinity and strength!
It is very rare on earth.

What did you say?

I mean...
You won't understand no matter how I put it

In a word, you're extraordinary

I feel like we are old friends

I've got good wine "Daughter Red".
Let me get it for all of us

Don't fool around. Wait for me here.

What an extraordinary man!

- You bloody monk! Why are you here?
- Sex is nothings and nothings is sex

Mr Lau, no...

Miss Lau, so you're a lady

You scoundrel, you peeped at me bathing!

No, I didn't see anything

How do you know I'm a lady then?

Miss Lau, don't blame me

First, I didn't know you were taking a bath

Second, I didn't know you were female

Creep, in what way you learnt your Buddhism?
Drop dead, you horny monk!

Enough, even a Buddha may flare up!

Nudity doesn't count for much

Every creature is naked at birth

Have you seen a chicken or duck dressed?

Buddha be praised!

The Bodhi is not like the tree,
The mirror bright is nowhere shining

As there is nothing from the first,
Where can the dust itself collect?

I'm in no mood for your Zen poems.
I've already suffered.

You're a creep, a real creep!

Miss Lau, if you deem that as a loss

Come and touch me, knead me any way you like.

Don't ever try to scare me!

Chu

Abbot

I told you not to move around

Abbot, that fairies in the portrait smiled at me

Chu, illusion will not exist without imagineation

Your distracting thoughts breed illusions.

What I saw didn't look like illusion

Men belong to earth; spirits belong to hell

It's a bad omen if men and spirits
meet at the same space

Chu, you'd better forget what you've seen

Abbot, you mean what I saw is real?

Abbot, how can I ever see her again?

Do me a favor, please

No, it's dangerous

I'm a wanderer with no worries.
I'm not afraid at all.

You may lose your life!

I'd die without regrets if I could see her once

Fate!

I'll help you so as not to go
against Heaven's will

But you must promise me one thing

You must come back within 24 hours

Well, I promise

Don't take this as a precedent

If you hasn't returned
when this incense burns out

you'll drift in the Void without
ever getting back

Turn this wheel of the dharma

Read this passage of sutras
and you can move freely

And when coming upon any danger

Throw out the wheel,

and you'll be safe. Remember!

Thank you

The world-honored master's adamantine body;
Turn the wheel of dharma with all my heart

To enter the unborn passage

Buddha be praised!

Hands off!

Don't do it, disgusting!

Let go!

Mr Chu

How do you know my name?

My name is Wan Yee-Mung

My late dad is a famous fortune teller

He can tell the past and predict the future

After reading my fortune, he told me

I'd come upon an inexorable doom at 17

Don't cry. Confide it to me

He said I was fated to stay in hell for a period

Before you'd appear to take me as your wife

Don't worry, I won't hurt you

Dad said my life is not yet over

After we have sex, your yang can help

bring me back to earth

Your ladyship

Where's Yee-mung?

She's in the room opposite

Why didn't you announce the presence of a guest?

I must host a feast for him tonight

Yes, your ladyship

Namas Amita Buddha...

Please don't knock anymore, I beg you!

A monk is delighted by others reading sutras

Why are you an exception?

You chanted and knocked all night,
How could I fall asleep?

I won't do it anymore if

you tell me where Chu Chung is

Well, come with me, come with me

Come, come

Where's he?

As I told you repeatedly
he's walked into the wall

You're lying again

See for yourself

How can such a strong wall be penetrated?

And I saw nothing inside from outside

You asked me but won't believe what I said

Have you heard of Hellgate?

What? Hellgate?

No, but not much different from it

This painting is a crossing
between earth and hell

Laymen like you won't understand

He entered it a long while ago.
He should return now

This question is difficult to answer

Don't you know the mess outside?

The Court changes its policy everyday.

Chu won't come out probably because
he prefers to stay inside

Don't be silly, I was only joking

He'll come back for sure
before the incense burns out

He won't forsake his life. Am I right?

Don't worry.

They come and go freely, let it be

You came a long way to here, Mr. Chu.

Let me toast you celebrates your vsiit.

Thank you

- Let's go over to tease him - Good idea

Brother-in-law, sister,
we want to propose a toast

Come on, drink with arms locked

Look at brother-in-law, sister.
A blush came into his cheeks.

We're now of one family, Mr. Chu.
Let me toast to you

We're now of one family, Mr. Chu.
Let me toast to you

Your ladyship. I'm afraid master can't drink

Let me drink it for him

No, it's from her ladyship to brother-in-law

Sister can't drink it for him

I should drink it to appreciate her kind thought

Brother-in-law, drink it, you can't get drink

Brother-in-law, great!

I'm a bit drunk. I must return to retire

Please

Enjoy yourself.

Brother-in-law, one more

Yes, one more

It's from me, drink it

Well, I drink

This is my toast

Take it easy

Not yet finished

Well, I drink

You're a good drinker

Take this too

- Well done - Master

Drink it now! One more

- C'mon, finish this
- You won't get drunk

Come on, you're a good drinker.
What are you afraid of?

How's it?

Are you all right?

Where's Yee-Mung?

Where is she? Tell me!

She was abducted by old Demon Kap Yuen,
we are uncertain of her current situation

We're at a loss what to do

Where's Kap Yuen? Take me there right away

Here it is

Which evildeor dares to destroy my gold-body?

You not only defiled their virtue

But also abducted Yee-Mung

Hand over Yee-Mung quickly!

What did you say? Which Yee-Mung?

No more nonsense with him.
He won't admit it for sure

Fight with him!

There's no grudge between us.
Why trying to kill me?

You...

Your day is near

You don't understand?

I know my sentimental brother-in-law
has a strong yang

And only his blood can spoil your immortal body

And put you to death

I acted to set him up

I've endured you for long.
Do you think a tutelary god,

can put on an act and restrict us
from doing this and that

From now on, I'll be in charge here

After eating your flesh

I can get out of the painting and rule the world

Wonderful

Now let me finish you off.

Don't!

- Bring them back - Yes

Get up!

Go!

Go!

Miss Lau, eat something first

No, thanks, I have no appetite

You must eat

Abbot, will he be in danger?

Not now

I can't tell in four hours

Why?

The wheel is the key to pass in
and out of the painting.

But there's a time limit

When the incense burns out, the hellgate closes

What if he can't come back?

He'll be loiter in between man's world and hell

He can't be a man or a ghost

Abbot, do something. Let me bring him out

Stop dreaming

You're so fragile, Miss Lau

After entering, you may not live to get out

and you don't look well

Get out of here quick to avert the doom

I won't, even at death.
I must wait for him to return

Yee-Mung, you're so beautiful.
Let's play together

Come on. Come on.

Stop it. Keep away!

See you later

Keep away!

Load the blood

Let's play together

Keep away!

Why don't they play with me?

Your ladyship,
this is the hand of Kap Yuen Deity.

After another 49 days,
I can get out of the painting

To rule the mundane world

Food is so coarse. Inedible!

You ladyship, I've prepared good wine for you

Bring it quickly

Yes

Bring it quickly

Sister

She's staring at us.
Let's pretend that we are having fun.

Or we'll get into trouble. Come on

Bring Chu Chung to my room right away

Yes

Her ladyship wants to see him.

Yes

What are you doing?
Take advantage of me to kill someone again?

Chu, I know it was my fault

But if I don't obey her

We may both get killed

Don't think you can convince me with that

I know I can't possibly convince you

Well, let me take you out of the painting

My wheel was taken away by her. How can I leave?

I'll get it back for you for sure

Why do you want to take him away?

Fox demon, her ladyship ordered
sister to take him away

Take him away

Yes

Come in

Go in

Your ladyship, Chu Chung's here

- Yes
- Put him to bed

Why are you two coming in?

To help you undress, your ladyship

Get out!

Are you deaf? I told you to get out!

Yes

Sister, take any reckless actoin.
Let's wait for the cat to jump!

Yee-Mung

Sister

Don't!

What happened?

We saw someone ran that way when we rushed in.

Move

Yee-Mung

Cut it out! Let me take you away

You stand no chance of escape once she returns.

Look around over there

Yes

Hurry up!

Go

Sister, let me lure her away.
You go with brother-in-law

Chun-meng

- Yes
- Get hold of them!

Help me turn the wheel of dharma

The world-honored master's adamantine body;
Turn the wheel of dharma with all my heart

To enter the unborn passage

Good!

It hurts. Oh, no, he's finished!

You couldn't be right. He'll be back for sure

Incredibly, here he is!

Chu, Chu, are you all right?

Abbot, his body is burning. What should we do?

He may have been hurt by Kap Yuen. It's finished

Anything serious, abbot? You must help him.

Kap Yuen's axe is a sacred item from Heaven

No layman can hold it
because of its heavy yang content

Unless......

Unless what?

Unless we can find a girl ready to

sacrifice her virginity to him.

To squeeze his yang out.
That's the only ray of hope

But it could be dangerous

I'll help him

You?

Right, I'll help him

No more delay if you're
in a position to save his life.

These braziers are arrayed
according to the Big Dipper

They absorb the essence of sun, moon
and the auras of heaven and earth

Why don't you start now?

Show me how to do it

Ask a monk to teach you this?

Okay. Wait a moment. Let me think.

Have you got any idea?

I got it. A monk's six roots of sensations
are pure and clean

A layman's six roots are not clean

See if Chu has got that "root"

Root?

Something like this

No, no, no. This one is too big!

More or less like this one, understand?

I've found it. What shall I do next?

What then? What then?

Alright

When I was a neophyte

one day, some prostitutes came and asked for
a religious service to mourn for their pander

The abbot gather all the monks of the temple

and he gave us a test

During the service, we all sat on the floor

With the "wooden fish" between our legs

It's just like that now

What's the idea?

Those prostitutes wore sexy dresses

The abbot said a monk will drum
on the "wooden fish"

if his thoughts cannot free from lust

What happened then?

What happened?

During the service, every monk
drummed on the "wooden fish"

Only an old monk did not drum

At first, we praised him for his endurance

But when he stood up, the wooden fish
didn't drop on the floor

What's that mean?

The wooden fish was stuck up by his root

Have you got anything with you
like the wooden fish?

You're evil.

Enough. I know what to do now.

You started with it. Why call me evil?

What happened to your wooden fish?

I'm ashamed to say it

You must tell me.

Are you sure?

Yes

Well, listen

My wooden fish burst into pieces

So terrific?

You don't believe it?

Don't ask me anymore.
Save his life first. Undress

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung

All right, be more intimate

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung

Chu has hope now

Miss Liu, put on your clothes now

Finished?

Yes

Why has he not come to?

Do you think you are a fairy or something?
Not so soon

How do you feel?

I'm all right, but a bit tired

Only a bit?

What do you say?

Miss Lau, you must take a rest yourself too

I'm going out and pluck him some herb medicine.

Don't worry. He'll be fine.
Take good care of him

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung... Don't desert me

Yee-Mung

Yee-Mung... Don't desert me

Your ladyship, she's passing out

Splash to sober her up

Yes

Anyone disobey my order will end up like her

Halt

Who are you? What's your relation to Chu Chung?

I'm Lau See-see, Chu Chung is my husband.

You evils, you wreak havoc everywhere. Let me go!

Or I'll kill you all!

This young lady talks big

Fox demon, teach her a lesson

Yes

Stop!

Dare you to talk big again?

Take her to my bedroom and let me fix her

Yes

How are we to dispose of this tramp Yee-Mung?

Confine her in prison right away

I'll eat her to go with my drink tomorrow

Yee-Mung

You laymen are a real nuisance

You turn down someone who loves you

And insist on getting the one
who doesn't love you

You're almost lost your life because of love

Yee-Mung

Now you're getting me involved

Be nice and drink it

Where's Yee-Mung?

Priest, where's Yee-Mung?

Damn you, you're heartless!

You're still thinking of her now

If Miss Lau hadn't saved you with her virginity

You'd have been in hell massaging the demons

See-see

How do you feel?

A little pain

Triangular love is bad enough,
but you're torn between earth and hell

See how you can cope with it

What has become of you?

I was used by an old lady to kill Kap Yuen Deity

Did you kill him?

Yes

That's serious, you've even killed Kap Yuen Deity

It's going to be upside-down in hell

What sort of a person is that old lady?

She's not human,
she's a wolf with 1,000 year's practice

Only Kap Yuen can overpower her

Miss Lau's doom is not yet over

Priest, where's See-see?

Why ask her since you don't love her?

Let her go where she likes

Where on earth is she?

It's sexual love again

I must thank mammy for having
made me a monk so early in my life

Don't talk nonsense now

I talk nonsense?

I climbed up mountains picking herbs for you

And you said I'm talking nonsense?

I know your noble personality
but I'm worry about See-see

Where's she?

Come with me

Only this left, have a look.

Priest

Don't count me in. I don't want to die yet.

They've both saved me once

If we don't go in, they'll die for sure

It's fate. You can't help it if they must die

Don't let me be buried with them

You're a Buddhist and you won't care to help

You can't go against
the decree of fate, understand?

- Give me the wheel. Give it to me
- Don't, don't be crafty!

The world-honored master's adamantine body;
Turn the wheel of dharma with all my heart

Don't, we may die!

What now?

I told you that I don't want to
get killed in here but you won't listen

That's true. I haven't eat enough,
I haven't play enough.

Dying this way is unfair to myself.
Do you understand?

Priest, don't you care about
Yee-Mung and See-see?

I won't live without them

Hold that wheel

Disobey and you suf..fer...

and you suffer right away! Wait

Buddha be praised!

Yu-meng, it's you!

Brother-in-law, let me go first

No, who knows if she's good or evil

Never mind. We have no time to waste.

I'll take you to rescue sister

Yee-Mung, you are so tender-skinned

What a pity if you were eaten by that old woman

Marry me, and I'll beg mercy from her

Open up. I got orders to take her away

Yes

Let me go! Let me go!

Sin, sin!

Priest, are you all right?

I'm fine.

Do you know a girl named Lau See-see?

Yes. She sacrificed her virginity to save Chu

You're...

The reverend Wick

Buddha be praised!

Miss Lau was captured by the old hang.
Go and help her quick!

But what?
- But...

That old hag has eaten Chia Yuan's flesh
and increased her power

We may not be able to overpower her

In any case, we'll fight

Follow me

Fight? It'd be death for sure. Wait for me.

Let me go! Let me go!

Let me go! Let me go!

Help!

You won't suffer much if you're nice

Don't, don't!

Take me to the bed

Take you to the bed?

Don't you know I have extraordinary power? Look

Hold it

Hold it

Wait

Chu, don't let it burn out.
My life now depends on you

How am I to contact you?

In a word, that lamp mustn't burn out

Be careful

Who is it?

Your ladyship, it's me

Come on, come and join in the fun

Big woman? What a sin!

What a smell!

When did she wash her feet last time?

It stinks! Who'd enter hell if I don't?

I'm damned to be a monk.
Now my life's practice is gone!

What is it?

It stinks, it's sort of wet

It stinks. I'll kick you dead

Damn, damn! I'll kill you!

Yee-Mung, are you all right?

Yes. Go and help Miss Lau first

Master

Let's go.

Who are you? Come out quickly!

Devil, lay down your sword and be saintly!

Otherwise, your thousand years'
practice will be gone!

Don't think I can't cope with
you when you're inside

Wait and see

Diarrhea, finished!

What a pity! Hurting yourself

Yee-Mung

Run, run quickly!

Run!

The world-honored master's adamantine body;
Turn the wheel of dharma with all my heart

To enter the unborn passage

Oh, no more oil!

Hold it!

Are you ok?

Master

Catch

Kill that devil or I'm finished. Come on!

I don't want to die here. That'll deny me
to go to the Western Paradise

Try to burn her with fire

Pour the oil quickly

Light the fire!

Prajnaparamita, Prajnaparamita!

See-see

How are you, See-see?

- See-see
- Miss Lau

Don't be sad.

Now I understand that an importunate demand
will never be achieved.

Cut it out!

I'd die in peace if you were all right

No, you won't die

Miss Lau

Yee-Mung, are you all right?

Yee-Mung

A ghost is a ghost. We must part anyway.

Never

Take care!

Never!

See-see

Miss Lau

See-see

Yee-Mung. Yee-Mung.

We won't part, we won't

Yee-Mung

So luck's with me

Priest

Chu, you're out?

Miss Lau really is...

We can't go against Heaven. Buddha be praised!

Priest, Yee-Mung may evaporate in no time.
Try to help her now!

Chu, don't worry

A mundane being sacrifices oneself for you

One in hell returns to earth and is reborn

It's a swap between hell and earth

Chu, fortune did smile on you

By dint of your strong yang and true love

You can shuttle between earth and hell

And bring Yee-Mung back to earth

Buddha be praised!

Thank you, priest

Don't mention it

It's better to be an earthly man