El 5 de talleres (2014) - full transcript

MATCH DAY 9

You suck!

That was a fair tackle!

A straight red card?

You suck, Ref!
What the hell are you doing?

You're screwing us over, Ref!

- You know the drill. Get out!
- Have you gone blind?

- C'mon, I told you to get out.
- You screwed us over!

- And you did nothing but fouling.
- Great job out there! Bravo!

Patón!

The armband! Gimme the armband!



Come on, hurry!

- Hi, guys.
- Hi.

- I'm here to apologize.
- No, boss, you can't go in.

- It'll be a second...
- Not now.

Relax. We said "No."

- He's with the doctor.
- What's the big deal?

I'll tell him you came.

- You were too rough on him.
- So? Football's like that.

OK, tough guy, now go.

What happens in the field,
stays in the field.

- I wanna apol...
- Go, it's OK.

C'mon, get outta here.

- Now it's not the time.
- I just wanted to say sorry.

Do it over the phone.



- What's up?
- Hi.

Do you want to have lunch
with your Mum and me tomorrow?

I'll let you know.

You rock, Patón!

Is that a "No"?

Get off my back, Dad.

It's Mono's birthday tonight.
It might go til late.

No need to be rude, see?

I just wanna be left alone.

Stop giving away points to our rivals!

What did you say?

Say it to my face, you fat jerk!

Less talking and more playing, Patón!

Bring your fat ass over here!

- Enough!
- He started it!

Never mind that fat loser.
Let's go.

In through the other side.

- Wanna ride shotgun?
- The other side!

That door doesn't work.

So, Berazategui's substitute keeper.

He's Macedo's son.
Remember Macedo?

He put tar paper on our roof.

Iono took over as 5?

Yeah.

Was he any good?

Sort of. But he couldn't stop
the blond guy, either.

I love his new haircut.

- He seems human now.
- He does.

I'm having mine cut, too.

What? You have no hair left to cut!

- I'll shave my head.
- Don't, baby, you look great.

Your head is too pointy,
it wouldn't suit you.

- S top the car!
- Why? What happened?

Sergio, wait!

- Sergio!
- Patón!

- Sergio!
- Come back here!

- I can't believe this guy!
- He's such a moron. Sergio!

RELEASE SLIP

- Later, man. Take care.
- Later.

- Sign here, please.
- Yes.

All right. Until next time.

- I was worried sick, I mean it.
- You sound like my girlfriend.

But they call me, not her.

Relax. It isn't such a bad thing
to have a convicted felon in the team.

You're a worse moron than he is.

Take it easy, man.

Think of what this does to your Dad.

You're a bunch of morons.

All set? Let's go, then.

Babe!

- OK.
- Incoming!

Be careful!

The mustard we had at your uncle's.

- What's it called?
- "Dijon."

- It's 65 pesos.
- Wow! Expensive stuff.

No, no way. There is a bunch
of other stuff we need to buy.

Let's get it instead of the soda.

We both drink soda, that's just for you.
Let's focus on stuff we both use.

Didn't you notice
I've stopped using Clinique soap?

Don't get all cop on me!

I don't. Watch that tone.

- Can't I give myself a treat?
- Whatever.

- The light switch is there!
- No! It's behind you.

- I was here before!
- It's back there, Patón!

Patón, the light switch is over there.

- What are you doing? It's over there!
- All right, all right.

- It's so damn hidden!
- The switch is always by the door.

No way we'll finish this in 30 minutes.

What a drag, man!

Why did we eat before coming?
We should've eaten afterwards.

Cut the crap.

Take your time, man.

Go, go, go!
We're about to rotate, go!

Go, Polaco. Keep it up!

Good job! Your turn, Patón.
You go now, go!

That's it! Good job!

OK, gotta hang up now.
Talk to you later.

Patón!

Patón!

Those bastards gave me an 8-match ban?

Damn Football Association!

You were sent off only a month ago.

And that incident
at the changing room didn't help.

- We may get the ban shortened...
- By 3 or 4 matches?

- More like three...
- Or two...

Back for the last match of the season?

- With an 8-match ban, for the last 3.
- Definitely for the 17th match.

Will you have paid us
what you owe us by then?

- We'll discuss that later.
- There's nothing to discuss...

- Can I have a minute?
- Sure...

Here, you have a minute.

- We'll pay you February in full today.
- And last month?

- Can I talk?
- Go ahead.

We'll have March settled in two weeks.

And a little extra this week.

Great. Now tell me,
if I want to make some stew...

do I chop off my penis
and add it to the vegetables?

You're overreacting, Patón...

You go tell this to
the rest of the guys.

I'll do it myself.

- You'll do it?
- Yes.

They gave me an 8-match ban...
Those bastards!

Don't forget to pay.
Do it for my wife.

It came back to me!

Who does Ivana,
Tincho's new girl, look like?

What?

Is the water on?

Yeah.

Doesn't Ivana look just like
that girl Capristo?

- From TV?
- Yeah.

From when she was in Big Brother.
She's identical to her!

Isn't she?

Isn't she, babe?

- I'm talking to you!
- And I'm playing here.

That game is making you stupid.

Screw you.

This is my last season.

Are you sure?

Yes.

Yes? Positive?

Turn off the game, babe,
this is serious stuff.

- I'll put the pasta in.
- OK.

I love you, handsome.

MATCH DAY 10

How about a pub?

You need a bunch of money
to set up a pub.

- And it's a lot of work.
- Yeah.

I know: a chicken grillhouse.

- Really?
- Of course not.

Silly.

Stand up.

Give me your hand.

There you go.

- What's up?
- Let's slow dance.

Hair to hair.

- Grab it hard.
- Don't make me bang you.

- You wish.
- You know you want it.

How about selling crafts?

I'll get them cheap from Edu.

They serve warm beer in this pub.

I think you need a distraction.

I have one.

Cable TV, video games and pot.

I mean, something like Karate.

- Karate sucks.
- At least try it.

- Not Karate.
- Well, then try something else.

- I don't want to.
- Remember that time with the injury.

Maybe. We'll see.

Gotta go to the bathroom.

Curly?

It's Dani.

What's up, you bandit!

That goalie was called...

- I can't remember.
- Chichilo!

He went into politics.
He made a fortune out of it.

No, that's not the one.
I mean that one from class 77...

The one with the big nose.

Didn't you play for Temperley a while?

I wish. No, I never did.

They kicked me out.

I almost played for Claypole
but it fell through.

Someone told me that.

They were wrong.
Do you remember...

those three matches we played
against Los Andes?

- Three matches on a row!
- The things you remember!

I played for class 76 the entire match
and the 2nd half for class 75.

I got it: Aniade!

Aniade! His chin used to go
all the way down to his chest.

Toti's cousin.

- Right, Toti's cousin.
- How's that scoundrel doing?

Didn't you hear?

He passed away two years ago.

A real bummer.

He left a wife and child behind.

Goddamn awful.

Couldn't sleep?

- I have a business in mind.
- What?

- A laundry.
- A laundry?

It could work, there aren't any around.

- I ran into this old friend today.
- From high school?

- We were in the same team as children.
- I see.

He reminded me how I once broke
a guy's nose during a match.

- How mean! You did it on purpose?
- No, clearing the ball.

It was 1986.

- How old were you in 1986?
- Very young.

Do the math.

They called me "Curly" in school.

I like "Patón" better.

That plant is being eaten by ants.

Gotta get ant killer.

- Are you scared?
- No... No more than usual.

Happy birthday to you...

- Change that music. It sucks!
- Sing along, Patón, don't be a prick!

- This is real music.
- Shut up!

- Put some rock, or cumbia.
- Wanna hear Los Piojos, grandpa!

- Some Leo Matteoli.
- That's from when I was at school.

- Change that stinky music, you brats!
- You sound like my grandpa!

You're an old man!

Watch out, punk!

Crazy bastard!

You're crazy!

Did it hurt? It did?
Come here, I'll make love to you.

You're such a faggot!

Hello!

Hi.

Hi, babe. Look what I got.

We'll get 3 washers and 2 dryers first.

This beer is warm, dammit!

We can pay in 20 installments.

But there is a down payment of $1500.

I'll get some ice.

Work out how much each installment is.

- Beer with ice is disgusting.
- You said it was warm.

- Did you pay the phone bill?
- Tomorrow.

But it's due today!

No ice!

Did you even go to school?

- It's all gone.
- What's this nonsense?

- I don't remember how to divide.
- I can tell.

Why don't you go back to school,
now that you have time?

I wanna learn to play guitar.

- I mean it.
- I'm too old to go back to school.

Too old? You're hot.
I wanna get in your pants.

Really? You're hot, too, babe.
Don't touch me with that!

- Don't play hard to get. Come here!
- I mean it. Cut it out!

- That felt so good!
- Get away from me, you perv!

MATCH DAY 11

You gave your best.

Patón!

Good job, Iono, no matter what.

Easy, man.

Two minutes, Patón.

Cheer up, guys.
There's always next Saturday.

Good job, Chucky, you did great.

We'll kick ass next Saturday.

What?

What?

I can't hear you, I'm coming.

I expect to go back on the field...

And as I wasn't on the field today...

I feel a moral obligation,
and an obligation...

as a friend of these guys,
to be around, to support them.

Babe, did you tell them
about your retirement?

- What?
- Do they know it's your last season?

- I already told them.
- You lying bastard!

I just saw you on TV saying
Patón will be around for a while.

Your voice sounds so stupid on TV.

"Patón is in great shape,
he'll be around for a while."

I'll do it next week.

"I'll do it next week." Liar!

Open it. It's a bit crappy,
but we ran out of good wine.

- Pour me a glass, let's taste it.
- It's not that crappy.

Pour me a glass.

Let me taste it.

Good enough.

Tell them, babe.

- Couldn't you find a cheaper one?
- You're being mean.

That's because he
had the good one first.

Here's some flan.

- Oh! Quique called.
- What's up with that hobo?

He can't come until next week.
That dum bass.

Sergio has something to tell you.

What is it?

- Tell them!
- I don't feel like it.

Is it what I think it is?

- No?
- No.

This is not the time.

Why not?

Not today.

Come on, the suspense is killing me.

Say it already!

All right...

I'm going back to school.

How wonderful!
Those are great news.

Congratulate him, dummy!
S how some support!

I think it's a great idea!
Congratulations!

- Good for you!
- There's more.

After school, I'll go to university.

Nutritionism.

I'll be a graduate student.

A graduate student!

This is the best present ever!

Still, let's take things step by step.

You're such a downer! Cheer up a bit!

- A nutritionist? Really?
- I was kidding. I'm quitting football.

I'm through with it.

But you're going back to school.

No, I'm too old for that.
I'd look like a fool.

What a shame!

- Yummy.
- See?

My own recipe.

- It's a pity. Are you sure?
- I am.

You have 2 or 3 more years in you.

- It may seem that way to you but...
- Sure, it's just my opinion...

Maybe even 3 or 4 more years.

I'm done.

I'd reconsider, you aren't the problem.

Those kids around you
don't make the cut.

I've made my decision, Dad.

Those kids are the problem,
and that coach of yours, Donato.

That fool should put seasoned players
around you, to help you out...

- He's made up his mind, Mariano.
- I know, but I disagree.

There're more things at play.
There's Iono.

He's your age, but he's finished.
He can't lift a leg...

He makes you run twice as much.
Back and forth the entire match.

You end up exhausted, but if there
was some other midfielder around...

It's not about Iono or Donato.

Iono is a great guy,
I've known him forever,

all I'm saying is that because of him,
you have to run twice as much.

Think it over.
You might change your mind.

I won't, my decision is final.

- In that case...
- Won't you listen to him?

I heard him. Good for him.
You're making a great decision.

But I would reconsider.

Enough! Stop repeating yourself.

- Screw you.
- Enough! Please!

If you have a brain, reconsider.
Here it comes again: reconsider.

- Good luck with everything.
- The same to you.

What a moron.

Want some?

- Enough.
- Foamy.

Thanks.

I'm fine, I'm over it now.

I think he's making a rash decision.

Maybe, but it's his decision to make.

- Yeah. A cigarette?
- No, I've been smoking all day.

I'm worried, you know?

- And if he gets depressed?
- Like when he got injured?

But he won't. No.

- Have you talked about it?
- That subject is off-limits for Patón.

Forget it.

- I wonder who he takes after...
- So do I.

- Bonasioli?
- It's Bonasiole.

Follow me.

Any of my former teachers left?

Let me see...

Chiapparelli, I guess. From 1993.

- And Professor Ocheodoro?
- He passed.

It's been 3 years already.
He was only 51.

- Bummer.
- Yes, a real shame.

A great person.

He'd take us to play ball
with the inmates at Caseros.

- Inmates?
- We played against the rapists once.

- We won 5-0.
- He was a great person.

As a teacher, who knows.

Here's yours.

Ten. Ten subjects!

- Ten?
- Yes. Ten of 5th grade.

This one is harder than the first,
but any of them will do.

- One question.
- What?

- What if I do all of them correctly?
- I'll put you more exercises.

No prize? Like an incentive?

Listen, little dumb angel of mine:

You have to sit for 10 exams!
Do the exercises.

Teacher?

- You called me "angel"?
- Yes.

From all your students...

am I your favourite one?

You are, but I gotta go to the gym.
So you'd better hurry up.

I can tell you work out.
You have a nice butt.

It's chiseled.

A sight to behold.

Young man, the exam is in two months.
Will you get down to work already?

How about a piece of that?

I'd become a rocket scientist for that.

- This is comfortable...
- Is it?

Is that the eraser in your pants?

Did you hear?

- Didn't you hear? Break time.
- Screw that.

No. Time for the break.

That's cruel.

Listen, I want you to finish that.
I'll check it when I get back.

Later.

All of them!

Remember that Seagal movie?
He fights some Russians in a submarine.

It was on cable.

So, Steven Seagal, a veteran CIA agent,

meets another agent,
a huge, black dude.

This guy says a line that fits
our current situation like a glove.

He says...

"Defeat at war isn't the larger evil.

Except if it is inflicted upon us
by an unworthy enemy."

- What's their position?
- Last.

- And ours?
- Sixth.

Eighth, Chucky.

15 points above them!
And in 90 minutes, they'll be 18!

And where are those 3 points?
In your heads!

I want them to go from your heads
to your hearts!

And, from there, to your guts,
and then on to your boots.

And from your boots to the green,
and finally into the net!

Play with your heart!
Let's relegate them!

Give everything you have!

Let's kick some ass, Talleres!

MATCH DAY 12

I'm not saying Iono is a bad player,
but he lacks character and it shows.

As a player and a leader, he's an A+.

He's recovering from an injury.
When he's fit again, you'll see.

With you, the young ones grow bolder,
there's a big difference.

We're running late.

Listen.

- Can you keep a secret?
- Yeah.

- Can you?
- Yes! Want me to swear on it?

- You won't tell?
- OK, I promise.

- This is my last season.
- Really?

- Is it a joke?
- No.

Why so much secrecy?

I may change my mind.

Look at this one!
It's so cute, I love it.

It's cool.

What about this one for Claudio?
He ordered one.

- He orders and then doesn't buy.
- But this is awesome.

And this one?
I love the whole ensemble. Look!

Do we get a discount if we buy in bulk?

- This one?
- No.

I think full price is too much.

- We can get discounts at Capricho.
- That's too far, we're here now.

- Excuse me, are you following us?
- No.

- Sorry. Why did you say that?
- S he was. I saw her.

- You're paranoid.
- I'm not.

- What's up, babe?
- Hi, sweetie.

- How's it going?
- Not bad.

- Hello!
- Hi, love.

- They moved the holiday to Monday.
- Cool!

- I had an awesome idea.
- Did you?

- Let's set up a clothes delivery.
- That could work.

It's brilliant. First we sell to
friends, family, acquaintances...

- And it isn't that big of an investment.
- Yeah. It's great.

The first one is OK, well done!

You handle the female customers
and I'll sell to men at the club.

It'll be great.

I got data about women's clothes,
but we can ask about men's.

Definitely.

The next two are wrong.

All of them are.

That's it? What's wrong, babe?

I'm too dumb for them.

- Is that all you did?
- I couldn't do the rest.

It isn't a matter of being dumb,
you just gotta practice more.

- Practice and you'll catch up.
- If I'm dumb, I'm dumb.

- Keep calm... and intensify your study.
- OK, so you won't understand.

- I don't understand?
- Never mind.

What's the matter with you?

Come back here! Patón!

Always the same with you!

I'm neither a teacher nor a mother!

I'm your goddamn wife!
Get it together, man!

- Hi.
- Hi, how's it going?

- May I help you?
- Sure. Do you sell in bulk?

- Pardon?
- In bulk, as in large numbers.

No. This is a mall.

- Right... I see. Thanks.
- Any time.

- Hi.
- Hi, how's it going?

Not bad.

- Acoustic guitars with amplification?
- You mean electro-acoustic?

Let me get one for you.
I'll be right back.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Ale?

Ale?

I just wanted to say... I'm a moron.

I'm a damn fool.

ASSHOLE!

MATCH DAY 13

Patón.

Hi, Hugo.

- How's it going?
- Hi, Patón.

Up since 5 am to have my blood sampled.
I have high blood pressure.

Due to this new tech,
fasting is not necessary.

- Right.
- They push your body to the limit.

It's like a strength test.

- What's up?
- Hi, bro.

Donato. Looking sharp.

Since you're both here...
A ciggie?

- No, thanks.
- Too early.

- No pre-match concentration this time.
- We'll concentrate at home?

Yes, probably.

I would offer my country house
but I'm on thin ice with the wife.

- Did you tell Donato?
- About what?

- There's this kid...
- Talk to the scout.

- You're such a moron.
- Why do you talk to me like that?

- You swore to secrecy. You're a jerk.
- Don't talk to me like that. Chill.

- You're a gossip!
- May be you changed your mind.

I haven't, I need more time.
You're worse than my granny.

- I could use a hand, you know?
- Let me help...

Too late.

- I'm making dinner. Potato pie.
- Great.

- I was at La Salada market.
- How cool!

What excitement!

I saw something we can do
but I doubt you'll like it.

- What?
- Selling female underwear.

- Sure, I'm in.
- Really?

I'll give pointers to customers.
"Your butt looks great in this."

"Look at your crotch in this one."

Idiot.

What did you say?
What was it?

- What did you say?
- What you heard.

- What did you say?
- Be careful, you're on thin ice.

Why stirring up the past?
What a crappy thing to do.

I'm going through a rough patch,
but you know how I feel about you.

- How do you feel about me?
- You know well.

Say it, then.

You know damn well.

I love you, we're cool.

Good job with those exercises.
But don't get too cocky.

- OK, thanks.
- Idiot.

Go, go, go! Dammit!

Clear the ball. Clear it!

Hey! Leave them off side!

- You suck!
- Goddamn!

Didn't you see that?
What the hell is this?

MATCH DAY 14

At first I was against this decision.

But the guys in the committee
made me change my mind.

You have our full support,
despite the team's campaign.

What he's trying to say,
what we all think...

We've had poor results recently,
but we think of this as a process.

And you play a key role in it.

I feel obliged to express my gratitude.

These are rough times for me personally.

I'm failing the club. In view of that,
the professional thing to do...

is to hand my resignation.

Hugo, we are all aware of
your personal problems.

- But don't forget...
- Look... May I?

- Sure, take over. No problem.
- All right, if you say so.

We've all been embarked
on this process for a year now.

Since we lifted the bankruptcy...

Excuse me, I don't mean to meddle...

There's something I wanna say.
I came here for another reason but...

we're in a losing run.
That's a fact.

I'm stating the obvious.

You're a special coach, Hugo:
Nobody bad-mouths you.

No one in the starting eleven,
none of the substitutes.

- Some do.
- Yes, but...

That's normal. But those of us
in the starting eleven...

We respect your tactical vision,
despite our disagreements.

Come game time, we zone everything out
and make our best effort as a team.

You told us once,
and I'll never forget...

You once said...

"I need you to trust me."

I never said that.

Not in so many words.

We go back a while, Patón...

Hugo! Think about it.

Think it over.

In all honesty...

I've been here many times before...

but I've never seen such support.

Start winning or we'll change our minds.

Training session tomorrow at 8, then.

- Finally!
- Thank you.

Congrats, Hugo.

Actually, I came here to tell you...

that this is my final season.

What?

I'm through with it.

We're playing in two days.
Keep thinking about the match.

At home, in your free time,
think about the match.

Losing isn't an option.
Way to go, Talleres!

Patón has an announcement to make.

- They aren't paying on Friday?
- They are. Still, keep praying.

Before you hear it
from some gossip old lady,

I wanted to tell you personally that...

this is my final season.

- Are you serious?
- Dead serious.

- You're joking.
- Why would I joke about it?

- You're joking around.
- I'm not, don't laugh.

- You mean it?
- Yep.

- Don't be scared, man.
- Shut up.

We'll miss you, man.

Stay with us.

Stay with us, stay with us,
Patón, stay with us.

MATCH DAY 15

- He said he'd be here by now.
- He'll be here.

He complained he had been trying
to rent it out for a year.

And now he doesn't show up.

Wrong.

- They're all wrong!
- All of them?

I'll be right back.

Hi, Pauli, what's up?

Fine. And you?

Awesome! Yeah, sure.

OK, bye.

Sure, great.

- Are you insane?
- Can I tell you something?

We always smoke pot, never tobacco.

But you're still a pro.
You gotta look after yourself.

I don't know if this is a good spot
for an underwear shop.

- Lingerie.
- Whatever.

A French word.

After I sit for Maths,
I'll prepare English.

I didn't follow.
I only got "Tandil."

- Hi, it's Héctor, from Escalada.
- Hi, Héctor, how's it going?

I wish you the best
in this new stage of your life.

- You gave a lot to the club.
- Thanks, Héctor.

I'd just like to say one more thing.

You liked roughing other players up
and we ended up with ten many times...

- You're very kind, Héctor.
- That's football. Thanks for calling.

Good night. Bye, Patón.

- OK. Moving on...
- That was a little harsh.

Your trademark.

We're big fans.
People gets... passionate.

Our sponsor, Maracaná Five-a-side,
invites you... You know where it is?

- Of course.
- In the heart of Escalada.

There's a voucher for you,
your birthday's coming soon, right?

- In nine months.
- Nine months! Well...

We have another call.
What a night!

- Hi?
- Hello. Who's that?

Santi, from Banfield.

- Hi, Santi. What's up, my man?
- Hi, Patón, great talking to you.

I'm here with Richard.
He says he knows you.

May be you know him,
everyone calls him "Dick".

- I know many Dicks.
- Indeed you do, faggot!

Go Temperley!

Hang up. What's just happened?
Did you get this boy's number?

Let's go to commercials.

We'll fix this, this is live TV.
Apologies to Remedios de Escalada.

We'll be right back.

Sorry about that, man.

Watch out who goes on the air!

- Do you have his number?
- Yeah.

- 15... 18... Did you write the 8?
- Yes, you said 18, so yes.

- 92.
- Say it all together.

15, 18, 92, 12, 79.

Thanks.

- Hello? Who's that?
- Listen, you chickenshit...

Why don't you come here
so we talk face to face?

- I'm on my way.
- I'll kick your ass, motherfucker.

- Grow a pair, asshole...
- Richard is coming too.

He hang up.

I'm so sorry. We go live,
we deal with this crap all the time.

It's all right, man.

In our next segment...

- Stay!
- We gotta go. Thanks anyway!

MATCH DAY 16

I came here to play volley ball
when I was 15.

- We played against a local team.
- 15 years old? Yummy.

- Fresh meat.
- Dirty old man.

We stayed over at this girl's house.
A total bitch. Her mother too.

I stole a Givenchy perfume from them.

- You stole it? Far out.
- It was just a cheap knockoff.

- I was here with Sofionce.
- With Sofi? Bo-ring!

- Why didn't we come before?
- You're jealous.

- How could I? S he's so lame.
- You're so jealous.

Stop it, moron!

You'll make me crash!
S top it, you idiot!

- What were you thinking?
- Then you take the wheel.

- That was so reckless!
- Drive the car yourself.

- Can't you see this is a national road?
- S top yelling at me!

- That was insane.
- "That was insane."

Idiot.

- Be careful!
- Sorry, babe. Are you OK?

- Are you OK?
- That hurt.

- We've never done it in the woods.
- Wanna do it there?

- Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf?
- Yeah, I want it badly.

- There's a bug on me.
- It's just a thistle.

Follow me, Little Red Riding Hood.

- A rat! I'm out of here.
- Stay, it's all right.

I don't see any rat.
What are you talking about?

Come back here!

- Thank you. Enjoy your stay.
- Thank you, madam.

Good night, madam.

So?

Excuse me. Just one more thing.

There're bicycles at your disposal,
if you feel like going for a ride.

I forgot to ask you about breakfast.
What would you like?

- Coffee for me.
- Coffee or chocolate milk.

- All right. It'll be here tomorrow.
- Great.

- Enjoy your stay. Good night.
- Good night, thanks.

- I like it.
- It's so small.

- It looked bigger on-line.
- Come on, it's nice.

- Some mate tea?
- No, I'm full.

- I've been thinking.
- What about?

There's no point in opening
a lingerie store.

There're hundreds of them.
Let's do something more original.

I think so. But what?
We're short of money.

Get your bike.

- Take me on yours.
- Don't be lazy.

Be a gentleman.

- C'mon, let's go.
- I can't ride.

- Come on.
- I don't know how to.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- You aren't smart enough for it?
- Idiot. I just don't know how to.

- Motor skills trouble?
- S top it.

You can't ride?

You're a jerk.

Enough, you idiot.

You've dated me forever
and you never told me.

There is plenty you ignore about me.
And we're married, not dating.

So I ignore a lot about you?
You're full of secrets now?

We both have our secrets.

I didn't know you had been with Vero
until you slipped at that party.

But I'm cool with it.

Who did you screw?

A lot of people.

Screw a friend of mine
and I'll kill you.

Shut up. You get all cocky
because I'm a woman?

Bullshit.

- Are you taking me?
- So long.

What? Come back here!

Patón! Come back, will you?

I won't go after you. Patón!

You're on your own.
I'm staying here, dammit!

- I'll let go of you. You can do it.
- Don't! Hold me.

There you go. You can do it!

You go, girl! Go, go, go!

Bring me the blanket, babe.

As a child, it would take me
forever to go to sleep.

My dad put on a puppet show
with socks until I was asleep.

- The poor guy was so patient.
- Your feet smell.

You're one to talk.

- That antifungal cream did wonders.
- Yeah, it really worked.

Donato told me about a place
where ex-footballers go.

A group for soon-to-be ex footballers.

Donato told you about it?
I think it's a great idea.

With psychologists.

Screw them.

- Warm and fuzzy.
- Yeah.

- Sleepy time?
- Yes.

That's better.

I'm not sleepy.

- What?
- I'm not sleepy...

- Watch out for that hole!
- Relax.

- Hi, how's it going?
- Hello.

Are we thinking the same thing?

- Will you be this indecisive tomorrow?
- Shut up and play.

- Truco!
- I take it.

- Retruco!
- I take it.

Take this, sucker!

How does it feel
to have your ass handed to you?

Sure. Later, bye.

You think you're so smart.
Does this place look like Jamaica?

Cool but pleasant night.

- Everything OK?
- Yeah.

- What's so funny?
- Nothing.

You're fixating on that. Don't.

You aren't a kid anymore.
Think harder.

Think about the moment you get
to an empty changing room.

The shirts lying around. The boots.
Nothing but silence.

Doesn't it stir anything inside?

I like the smell of changing rooms.

Like the smells from your childhood,
the way your grand ma's place smell.

Yeah.

- You say "yes" but you don't mean it.
- I'm trying to think of a smell.

- No, thanks.
- Come on, go for it.

- Nervous?
- A little.

The match itself isn't a big deal.

You think everything's at stake
on your last match, but it ain't.

You get emotional, your family's
there, you thank the crowd...

What matters comes afterward,
when you gotta start living life.

A month later, you're at home.
The clock turns four, five, six.

How will you handle that?
There is a memory to the body.

What?

For 15 years, at that time,
you have been at it, playing football.

- What will you do with that energy?
- Sex.

You think your wife'll go along with it?
"Let's screw on Saturday..."

That's the thing.

And it goes beyond football.

You realize you're not young any more.

More than half of it is gone.

Specially in your case,
being such an intense player.

It's not such a big deal, I guess...
There's a point when...

You get over it.

- It doesn't go on forever.
- You find other things to do.

I say all this and look at me now,
trapped in that box, yelling like crazy.

Patón and Negro, as usual.
Chucky, here, and Pablito, here.

You're faster and stronger
than those two garden gnomes.

Take it over, Patón.

Guys, they're tough, but we're tougher.

They may kick us in the stomach,
but we'll go for their heads.

Let's win today, man! Come on!

MATCH DAY 17

What's wrong?

Are you sure it didn't leak in?
Easy, breathe in.

Let's go outside. Come with me.

Nice and slow. Let's get some air.

- I think I rushed it.
- Calm down.

I think I rushed it.

There's a lot at stake today!
Big game today!

Especially for the young ones!

Picture this...

You're standing in the street
and you realize you're naked.

What do you do?

- Completely naked?
- What do you do? People are watching.

I cover my balls.

You cover your balls?

And you, Negro?

I guess I'd do the same.

No! No, no, no!
Wrong answer!

Everyone has balls!
What if they see yours?

This is funny?
Your poor piss performance is funny.

I don't care they see my balls.
Cover your face!

So they don't know it's me!

Acquired behaviour!
You run after the ball like puppies!

I got dizzy.

Good game so far.

MATCH DAY 18

The kitman brought a tape of our rival
to prepare the match.

That week we even did two shifts once.

We did set pieces and trained really
hard to make sure we won on Saturday.

"Let's play to win," I said,
and formed the team 4-3-1-2.

We were 3 down by half-time.

I tried to cheer up my players.
I had a substitution in mind...

Castrito for Saracco.

We were in the changing room
when suddenly there was silence...

The president of the club.

He closed the door. He was with
the treasurer and two other guys.

He called me, "Marcelo, come here."

As I walked up to him,
I was trying to reassure him.

"Relax, I'm positive
we'll come back from behind..."

He looked at me and said,

"Get your stuff and leave."

"Wait, you'll see we'll bounce back
and draw this match, I promise."

He said, "Just leave."
"Just leave, " he said.

So I took my things and left.

Go on and laugh, man.
It was years ago, I'm over it now.

I must be the first coach
fired during the interval.

Unheard of!

How does the rest feel
about his story?

Can you relate to it?
Ever been in that situation?

- I'm so sorry.
- Sergio...

Let's respect our time together.
Keep your cell-phone off, please.

I know it's your first time here but...

Answer.

- Excuse me.
- Next time, please...

Hi? Bonasiole? We're calling you
to inform you that... You suck!

I'll goddamn kill you!
You're dead, you hear?

Say that to my face, coward!
Go to hell!

Hello? Hello?

The cell-phone you're trying to reach
is either off or...

I put my foot like this and the ball
goes in the top corner. What a goal!

LAST MATCH DAY

- Let's go. Bessasso is taking the women.
- Yeah. Ale just texted me.

I got the optical light for the car.
200 pesos for that piece of crap!

They ripped you off.

- You know, right?
- What?

- You know. Don't play dumb.
- What's with the mystery?

- Give them hell.
- I always do.

It's a shame, you could go on two
or three years. With those genes.

- What genes?
- These.

- Are you kidding?
- Feel it. Come on.

- Don't make me kick your ass.
- You wouldn't last me a parrot fart.

- Want a piece of me?
- Cut it out.

- Cut the crap.
- Just one round. Two punches.

- Come on, be a man. Fight me.
- We're gonna be late.

- We're running late.
- Just two punches.

- Don't be ridiculous. We'll be late.
- Come on, I feel like punching you.

You chickened out, you sissy!

Jump every three steps.
Jump higher!

Come on! Focus!

Captains!

Help me out here, guys.
Do as I say, you know the drill.

Give me a hand.
Act responsibly.

- Head. Kickoff or side?
- This side.

A picture.

Change sides! Come on!

- Are you talking to me or to them?
- To all of you.

- Do you ask for the ball?
- Constantly!

Don't leave the attack
to get the ball. Ask for it.

Don't leave your position.
I'll do my best to get the ball there.

Also, cover the other's back.
Are you tired, Iono?

You're not covering for the full-back
when he goes into the attack.

- I'm not tired.
- We're a team. Do your job or you're out.

- Take me out, then.
- Really?

- What's with the attitude?
- You're the expert. Take me out.

- Maybe this isn't the time...
- This is between him and me.

You're the playmaker, Chucky.
Stop running around.

Stick to your position.

Cattenazzi! Warm up!

Good job, man!

LAST MATCH DAY

- You answered x=9?
- I did. Maybe I was wrong.

I answered x=11, and I was
sure I'd done that one right.

- Maybe you made a mistake...
- Bonasiole!

There's a little problem.

Two exercises are
correct, and three wrong.

You started the last one right
but you made a mistake at the end.

We know how hard you worked for this,
so we'll put you another exercise.

You have five minutes to do it.

Do it right and you pass.

- OK.
- Only five minutes, no more.

It's correct.

Good job.

Congratulations.

- Hi, how's it going?
- How's it going?

- How much is it?
- 92 pesos.

Heat this up for a bit.
They're great.

Your face looks familiar.
Are you from Lomas?

I'm from Escalada.

- Keep the change.
- Thanks.

- Later, dude.
- Later.

Found the street yet?

Was I right?

It's close to Alsina?

I've had enough of it for today.
We've been practicing all day.

I know that bald guy.

He played for Los Andes as a kid.
I kicked the hell out of him once.

I'd forgotten about him.
That's why he said I looked familiar.