Dressed in Blue (1983) - full transcript

Several transvestite prostitutes that work the Madrid streets discuss their personal experiences. The camera follows their daily lives. The lid is also lifted on their personal histories.

Look at them, they're already there.

The police, the police!

Leave me! Leave me!

ALL THE CHARACTERS

IN THIS MOVIE ARE REAL.

THE FACTS AND SITUATIONS DESCRIBED

ARE ALL TRUE.

DRESSED IN BLUE

Where is this whore going?

- She's going to eat.

- No, I'm going to drink.

Where have you been, Loren?

They say you've been travelling.

Yes, I've been abroad.

Well, I haven't travelling.

- Well, you know, "She's been abroad..."

- I'm just telling you what I know.

I'm telling you the truth.

He's been in "Carabanchel

Hotel" (Carabanchel is a prison).

Yes.

Tell us if it's true that you must

fuck everyone there in Carabanchel.

That's a lie.

You can fuck whoever you want.

My name is Lorenzo Arana Orellano.

I was born in 1938 in Trebujena, Cádiz.

We are eight siblings and we grew up

in a very humble family.

My mother was 48 when she became widowed.

She has suffered a lot

to be able to raise us all.

At that time, my eldest sister became a nun

at the age of 21.

She was very pretty,

but left our mum all alone.

My sister Antonia was working at that time

and his boss got her pregnant...

Villages are the worst places in the world.

There they treat and

abuse people very badly.

And my sister was very badly treated,

like in the soap opera "Ama Rosa".

People treated her very badly

and she had to leave the village.

I prefer living alone

and receive visits from time to time,

like this guy I met this last time

I've been in Carabanchel.

He has visited me but

he has nowhere to go, so I

told him to come to my

house whenever he wanted.

- Do you remember the day we met?

- How could I forget it?

Of course, you can't.

That day my mother-in-law was there.

Yes, of course.

She was there, too.

Yes, of course.

She told me about a fantastic guy

from the Canaries.

And, of course, I couldn't

know who you could be.

One day, when we were in the back yard,

he saw you walking in the street,

and told me: "It's him."

- I remember.

- Yes. And that's when I met you.

I couldn't believe

everything would be so fast.

Luckily...

Well, luckily... Everything turned

out well since you are a good man.

They usually say: "You can get out of prison,

but you can't get out of the cemetery."

Get it?

Yes, I do. But sometimes you

feel like you were in a cemetery.

When you are all alone and don't know if

there will be someone coming into your life...

We are eight siblings.

My eldest sister became a nun.

The next one is a dyke.

I can't deny it, I'm saying it openly.

Then comes my sister Carmen,

who is married and has five sons.

She wanted to have a girl,

but could only have sons.

Them came I. My mother

always say that I'm "a bad event".

I worked as a butler, serving

the plates, cleaning the dust.

After seven years serving that family,

I worked for the Counts of [CENSORED].

I was very well treated there,

although the Countess was very demanding

when people like the Duke of [CENSORED]...

Also, the [CENSORED].

I met the Marquis of [CENSORED].

By the way, they spoke very badly

of each other when having dinner.

I don't know why, because...

Of course, I didn't understand anything.

I just can remember once

during a dinner with the

Marquis of [CENSORED].

They were talking about

"El Lute" and I thought

they referred to the

famous one in prison.

And it turned out that it

was the [CENSORED].

They called him "El Lute".

They used to say, "The son of El Lute"...

...stutters.

They said, "The son of El Lute stutters".

I said to myself, "My God."

And then I told his mum, named Dora,

"Who is this Lute in this house, Dora?"

"I'm always listening

everywhere El Lute, El Lute".

- "Is he the one who is in prison?"

- "No, no, no."

"You are mistaken, Lorenzo".

"El Lute is the Duke of [CENSORED]".

"The husband of Carmencita [CENSORED]".

So, that's how I could know who

El Lute was. I also remember...

that the Countess...

said, "He's got a friend".

Because, you know, that kind of people

think that being a gay is a crime.

But she had an affair with

the Duke of [CENSORED].

And whenever she wanted,

she went to Puerta de Hierro.

She slept with him, and ate there so that

nobody could say his husband was a cuckold.

Understand? And if got to know

that you were a gay,

they fired you at once.

However, she was also a whore,

and a very corrupt person,

you know, but that wasn't a crime.

"Crimes are always committed by the poor".

If there isn't any job for humble people,

with all this unemployment,

could there be any job for us?

We are not to blame.

Those who look for us are to blame.

We need to eat, get it?

Because, as the song says, "Let he

who has not sinned throw the fist stone".

Nowadays, even the most decent women

tell their husbands

that they are working as maids.

But they don't work as maids.

They go to the Gran Vía or to the Montera

or to the Puerta del Sol

to do what they can, of course.

Or they simply go to

the bingo, spent their

money, and then they

have to justify themselves.

So, that's why they work as prostitutes.

When I'm alone at home,

sometimes I feel alone and I think,

"I'm very tired".

And I have to go to sleep very alone.

I've got nobody who loves me today.

I'm not afraid of solitude,

that's when I'm more comfortable.

I do the chores.

I've just come back from work.

I'm very happy because

I've earned a lot of money,

some 8-9 thousand pesetas.

I'm not a greedy person.

I was a bit more greedy in the past,

When I earn some 6-7 thousand pesetas,

I stop working,

because I'm very afraid of police,

as I said before.

What I fear most is when it's seven o'clock

and I have to make up and go to work.

This is my life.

I don't care about solitude.

I like being alone.

What do you want to be a woman for?

Is it for a sexual reason or what?

I think I'd feel a lot better

being a woman than being a man.

Tell us something about

your family situation.

My parents are divorced, and my

mother gets some money for this reason.

- Do they know anything about this?

- No, I haven't told them anything at all.

- They don't know.

- They don't know.

What kind of life would you like

to lead when you become a woman.

An ordinary life. I mean, I'd

like to work and lead a simple life.

What would you like to do for a living?

I'd like to work as a hairdresser.

It's what I like most.

Anyway, you'd like to

have hormone treatment.

Yes.

First, we have to carry out a diagnosis,

a study of hormones and some other studies,

and, apart from go on speaking,

we're going to do a diagnosis.

That's right.

My name is René Amor Fernández.

I was born in Bruselas.

My parents lived there at that time.

They are sepatared now and my

mother lives in Asturias with my brothers.

I'm 21 and I've always felt like a woman.

Since I was a kid of 8-9 years old,

I was a bit confused.

Maybe because of my manners.

My family doesn't know anthing

about my change.

I haven't seen them for nearly two years.

We just talk on the phone or write letters.

I must tell them.

I must tell my mom what's happened to me,

that I have changed

and that I'm not the same person.

That I'm a woman now.

But I don't know how to do it.

I'm a bit scared.

Maybe one day I'll make up my mind

and write a letter to them.

I don't know why but I'm very much scared.

- Hello?

- Hello. May I speak with Mayte?

- Yes, it's me.

- A friend gave me your number.

- Yes.

- Are you alone now?

- Yes, I'm alone, you can speak freely.

- Can I visit you now?

No, you could come a bit later.

I can't righ now.

Well, it'd be better for me to go now

because I have to go to work at five.

Ok, where are you right now?

- Pardon? Ok, I'm not very far from there.

- Where are you right now?

Ok, not very far.

Could you give me your address?

I'd prefer you to come here. That way,

we won't spend any time. Understand?

- How much is it?

- It's 12 thousand pesetas for one man.

- Yes. And what is it about?

- A full service.

- What is a full service?

- It's Greek style.

What's Greek style?

- What's Greek style?

- Yes.

It's anal sex with the lady.

All right. And what if there are two men?

Would it cost the same?

No, no. It would be two ladies

and 24 thousand pesetas.

- Could it be cheaper?

- No, this is not El Corte Inglés, honey.

This is a massage

house, not El Corte Inglés.

There aren't any discounts

like in El Corte Inglés.

I mean, if we are happy with the service,

we could go frequently.

- No, no.

- A little discount.

It works this way: the service will

be worse if they get paid less money.

- As you know, cheaper things...

- Yes?

Cheaper things are worse. It costs 12 thousand

pesetas but the service will be perfect.

New clients should

be treated very well.

No, new clients should

get used to paying better,

not to being treated badly.

- All right, I'll call you later.

- All right, bye.

You can be requested to go out

to dinner with a man,

You can be requested for a lot of things.

But, most of all, you are requested

to go out, have a drink, chat, dance

and give him a massage

according to what the client pays.

I mean, Thai massage would be

more expensive than a Greek style.

The prices of massages depend on

what the client requests.

An English massage

would be a special service,

a service for sadomasochists.

It is more refined to say,

"This girl has given me a Thai massage"

than saying: "I've been given

a massage inside a bathtube".

It is more refined.

It is for more educated men.

Maybe they called this way

to give it a more select touch.

People who use these terms and

understand them are more select,

and are precesily the kind of people

who can treat themselves

to phone a girl, give her some money

or a present

in exchange of every kind of massage.

So, the prices can vary a lot

from one type of massage to another.

- How's things about your job?

- As usual, nothing new.

Meanwhile, I'll serve you a drink.

My name is José Antonio Sánchez Sánchez.

I was born in Madrid on

the 11th of August, 1962.

I'm twenty years old, I've worked a lot

and I've suffered a lot, too.

And I've starved a lot

since I arrived in Barcelona.

But, at my age,

I've got a lot of things.

More than anyone.

Jewels, clothes, houses.

It's not that I have enjoyed life.

I've been working for even 24 hours

and I don't care.

I never cared about the price at all.

I mean, you earned a

lot but don't show off, I

have earned a lot and

I have a lot of things.

This mink coat isn't worth a penny.

But could I tell you something?

- Can I tell you why I'm wearing this coat?

- Why?

Because I want to be treated

like a lady, not like a queer.

- That way you'll be treated like a queer.

- No.

When I wake up and get up,

I'm surrounded by good watches, jewels.

I wake up and go to bed that way,

surrounded by jewels.

When I wash the dishes, I'm

wearing my jewels. I don't care at all.

Shall we get up?

Are you going to have a bath?

Love is beautiful for special moments.

But love for us is very difficult.

Thanks God, I can tell you that

I live with a person I love a lot,

who probably loves me a lot more

than I love him,

and he has helped me a lot.

I've been arrested a lot of times

when I was out,

because I've suffered a lot,

and he used to say:

"You're a fool. I knew this could happen.

You're always being arrested"

But, looking at the positive side,

you can enjoy a lot of things.

There are a lot of people who love me more

being a woman than being a man.

12 thousand pesetas for the full service.

You know, a full service.

All right, bye.

Do you want some coffee?

I would have liked to have children,

it would have been beautiful.

But having children with a person

you don't really love is a wrong decision.

I think that having children with a person

who's going to suffer

because you're homosexual

is not right.

I mean, having a child just for sex,

getting the girl pregnant

and leaving that child with a lot

of problems because the father is,

in a word, a transvestite,

just like me,

doesn't bother me.

I like children, but I can't have them.

Anyway, we could adopt one in the future.

There would be no

problem in adopting a child.

I've got some friends in Portugal

and France who have adopted a child.

I think that we'll be able to adopt a child

the day when we are respected as women.

I call Tońi to my sister.

I mean, sometimes, when her

friends are around, I call her Tońi

I really prefer to call her Nacha.

I mean, I treat him like a boy,

like my brother.

But, for me, she is a woman.

I'm very proud of you.

I like you, the way you are.

I really prefer you being a woman

than being...

a thief in prison or a retarded.

Of course, I would have preferred

to have you as an older brother

to be able to tell you my problems.

I didn't notice anything

until you began to put on makeup,

I felt very happy

because I've always wanted

my older sister to be a woman.

I'm Catholic.

I'm a very strange Catholic person.

I'm not committing any crime.

When I was younger,

I was leaded by my parents.

When I got older,

I did what I really wished.

Nowadays, a priest wears street clothes.

Yes, but clothes are incidental,

you can put them on and take them off.

Of course, but you put them on

and take them off because you feel it.

Some years ago, it was unthinkable

for a priest to wear trousers.

Catholic church has always told:

"You don't need to be chaste,

but be cautious."

Are you going to face society

being a Catholic, like you say?

- You can come to church...

- Yes, of course I can.

- Women in church don't sniff you.

- Yes, they do.

- Don't you suffer because of this?

- No, I don't.

Because I completely feel like a person

who can go to church.

I don't care about what people say.

I go to church because I like or just

because I want to tell you things about me.

And I couldn't tell about those things

to any average person.

The Gods in every religion

have always gone to the man himself. In

this case, to you, who has become a woman.

Yes, I'm a man for God,

because for the Earth

I'm not a man,

not even a woman: I'm a transvestite.

I mean, I'm an absurdity on the Earth.

Something you mustn't do, someone

you mustn't look at or speak to.

It's something I'm always thinking about:

"If there isn't any person on the Earth

who can understand me,

there is someone,

or a being, I don't know how to name it,

that at least knows who I am.

The same way we could

understand witches before

or can understand

parapsychological phenomena now,

things that we didn't

understand in the past,

and those who were possessed were burnt

I think that if you transvestites

begin a strong campaigning,

you could make the church think about it.

The church is not used to this

cultural transformation.

I don't live with the church,

I live with God.

Does that calm you down?

- Does that calm you down?

- Of course it does.

I know that I'm doing things right.

All in all,

I prefer becoming an older man

with some money,

and being respected by people,

even though I've had to move

from my neighbourhood or city,

I mean, being respected as a woman,

to being an old queer.

(SINGING IN SPANISH)

You were very pretty.

Ugly people can't go to the places you go!

- You can hide.

- I'm ugly and old.

- Don't say that!

- They could tell me: "Get out of here!"

You've got what we all wish!

What?

- I have to ask you a question in private.

- How's that?

Because I'm very intrigued.

- How's that?

- And I hope you won't be offended.

I'll ask you when we are all alone.

Not, now.

I know what you are going to ask her!

Where the hell has she got the dick?

I'm very sincere about these things.

Where the hell has she got the dick?

- I was staring at you for a long time.

- She's had her "door" operated.

What?

She's had her "door"

operated and "closed it"...

I pushed it inside...

She hasn't got a dick.

- Nothing?

- She hasn't got a dick.

- Nothing?

- Nothing.

She isn't really a transvestite.

- We trick people.

- She's a woman!

I saw you yesterday and I said to myself:

"She must be a woman".

And you really very hot!

My name is

Francisco Pérez de los Cobos Ávila.

At present, I call myself Eva.

I'm 23.

I was born on the 9th of December, 1959.

I come from Hellín,

in the province of Albacete.

I come from a family of eight siblings.

Five brothers, two sisters and...

Yours truly.

I usually work as a performer.

I do impersonations

and full-frontal nudity.

And sometimes... I work as a prostitute.

TEACHER AND PUPILS IN SCHOOL

(INAUDIBLE SPEAKING)

As a performer, I work with other two guys.

We work at weekends.

It's not very well paid.

It depends on the place you work in.

We get paid about 30-35 thousand pesetas.

One of them is married

and has got two children.

We travel in his car.

We aren't paid for travel expenses,

we just get paid for our job.

I don't know, that's all.

Good afternoon.

- Hi, good afternoon.

- Good afternoon.

We booked some rooms.

(INAUDIBLE)

I'd been some eight or ten months

without my ID because the police tore it.

I tried to get my ID several times

but they always made objections.

Then, a friend of mine who is a lawyer

decided to come with me.

Thanks to him, I could get my ID again.

So, I was very happy with my new ID.

- Is this ID yours?

- Yes, this is mine.

All right... All right.

- Eva!

- Yes?

Tomorrow afternoon we're going to Santońa.

Are you coming with us?

- What for?

- To deliver advertising.

No.

- Why?

- I want to go to the bingo.

If you don't waste your money,

you can live very well,

because we've got a lot of expenses.

The makeup, the clothes, gas, hotel...

We've got a lot of expenses.

Of course, I have to work as a prostitute

to be able to live well.

I'm so cold!

As a protistute, my fees are 2 thousand

pesetas in the car and 5 thousand at home.

There are people whose fees are lower,

but if you go home with a man

who doesn't mind paying more to be more

comfortable, you have to be better with him.

They criticised me a lot about my brests!

Everyone criticised me a lot!

But everyone wants the size

of Loren's breasts.

They'll remove my nut.

I'll have my breasts operated

to increase the volume.

And maybe some other tweaks.

I want to have my breasts

operated, my cheeks

and some tweaks,

but I won't have my penis operated.

I've never thought about it

but I don't think I'll do it.

That's what I want to feel fullfilled.

People who had an operation went crazy.

Think about it.

They cut your... Then what?

If they don't control it,

you've got to control it yourself.

I've got enough money but...

I've also got some friends who had

them operated and they don't...

"Tits draw more than

five yoke of oxen". And

I've been able to have

my breasts operated.

The body of a woman

who works as a prostitute

with the brain of a man

can be a money machine.

Mum, mum!

Paco is here!

Hi! How are you?

My God! We haven't

seen you for two years!

It will be two years more.

- Where is the rest of the family?

- Call your brothers!

What about Milagros?

She's coming now, too.

We haven't seen you for a long time!

Hi! How are you?

How are you?

- What about your wives?

- Hi, how are you?

What about the Christmas?

Your father had a very good

Christmas night.

He got drunk on whiskey.

I hadn't drunk for two years...

Vicente told me,

- "Have a glass of Johnny Walter".

- "Johnny Walter"???

- Johnny "what"?

- I said "Johnny Walter".

- It's "Walker"!

- So, I had two glasses and I got...

I don't remember many things

about my childhood.

I do remember I used to work

as a waitress with my sister,

I completely hid myself from her,

she didn't know anything about it.

I lived with her but I always hid myself

from her and my aunts.

At that time, I had a couple of

older brothers in Benidorm.

They used to go out and flirt

with foreign girls but I didn't want to.

I used to tell them I'd go home

but actually I used to go to gay clubs.

What are you looking at?

Nothing.

They told me you had your breasts operated.

- Do you like them, David?

- Very much. I like them very much.

Then don't look at me.

- Can I shoot, can't I?

- Yes.

- Have you ever had a girlfriend?

- No, never.

I once had one and now

she's my sister-in-law.

Really? Oh, my God!

You can touch if you want.

No, thank you.

They are true!

You're going to leave me out of breath.

I'm going to blush.

Your wife isn't out of breath

and she's got them smaller.

How can you know?

My mother-in-law have

them bigger than yours.

At least, the bra is bigger.

Tell me.

What do people say when I come back here?

I don't know. They don't tell me anything.

They speak to one another.

Don't you hear anything?

I don't hear anything.

They ask me and I answer them.

I saw three men in Angel's bar.

Yes.

They looked like mechanics.

- In overalls.

- They were hot.

- Do you know what I told teacher Javi?

- What?

- What did your brother come for?

- He came to see my school.

- Your sister too?

- Yes.

- What a bumpkin.

- Do you know him?

I've known him since I went to school.

- Did he wear a white coat?

- Yes. The thing is...

I have changed and they don't know.

Are you still working in the theatre?

No, I work in other kind of things.

- What does "other kind of things" mean?

- Things.

If I try to explain it to you,

you won't understand.

When I work, they don't choose me.

I choose them.

I have a very good time when I work.

And I get a lot of money. I can earn

40-50 thousand pesetas in one day.

I've got many types of clients.

Rich clients and not so rich clients.

Nice clients and not so nice clients.

There are always strange people among them.

- Hi, darling, are you feeling hot?

- Hi, I'm coming for you.

- Are we going to your house as usual?

- Of course. Get on, it's very cold.

- You know, as usual.

- Of course. Come one, get on.

- Come on, girl, it's time to fuck.

- Bye.

- Bye.

- Bye.

They must be very important people

because they all have got very nice houses.

You can see pictures of them

shaking hands with the King.

One of them has got a lot of pictures

of the King and him on the piano.

I mean, shaking hands.

Come on, you already know...

It's hotter in here today.

Last time I got such a cold...

Sit down, sit down.

Serve yourself a drink.

Would you mind paying me first?

Yes, of course.

But sit down, please.

- Is it all right?

- Yes, all right.

Are we going to do it

like we did last time?

- Do you want it as usual?

- Yes.

- Have a drink. I'll be ready soon.

- All right.

- Let me see.

- No, no, wait a moment.

Only this and it's over.

Open.

Open your eye!

Open it.

- I can see that you're...

- Open your eye!

I'll put it inside your eye!

I'll put something inside you...

It's all right.

Get up, I'll put on the wig.

Lee me see myself, please.

Give me the mirror.

Just a moment.

How wonderful!

- Don't you like it?

- I'm a very hot girl!

Come.

Wait a moment.

I have to brush it a little bit.

I think that the future

of a transvestite is

to earn money when young and to keep it,

and to be prudent, which I'm not.

I mean, to keep your money,

start a business and buy a house...

It's true that when you have something...

everybody loves you.

When you don't have anything...

Nobody loves you.

Imagine a 50-year-old transvestite.

I've kept some money,

and I plan to keep as much as I can

to buy a house. I mean, to be able

to say, "This house is mine".

I mean, I don't like paying for rent

a house which will never be yours.

Wait a moment. I prefer

not to have any money

to have a lot and be

always eating a sandwich.

- Wait a moment, please. Let me speak.

- When did you see me eating a sandwich?

I've seen you eating a sandwich

in the dressing room a lot of times.

Because I felt like eating a sandwich!

You just have that coat!

- You just have that coat!

- Your coat is borrowed!

She likes gossiping.

It's like a viper eating and consuming her.

Don't you think I've got money

to buy a coat?

I can buy one, two, three coats.

As many as my pussy likes buying.

- No, you haven't got a pussy.

- Well, as many as my dick wants.

Let them argue and don't interfere.

One day came a little gypsy

from Málaga

who was 18

with her character

and her hot-blooded gypsy blood

full of grace and full of beauty.

She remembers us of Isabel Pantoja.

She sang a song in her way,

with her green eyes.

Her name is Tamara!

My name is Juan Muńoz Santiago.

When I was kid, I felt myself like a woman.

I felt myself a woman with a dick.

I don't know...

And I realised that I couldn't be a man.

I always liked men,

and sleeping with them, of course.

I began dressing like a woman

at the age of 13.

Well, my mum knew it

and realised since I was a child,

because I was always with girls,

playing with them.

But my dad used to tell me,

"You have to get married."

I like speaking like women,

I never speak like men.

I mean, when I have to speak like men,

I just do it.

I'd like to have a "pińa colada".

What are you doing dressed like this?

- How do you want me to be dressed?

- Do you think this is logical?

- The way you are dressed?

- What way am I dressed?

In a very inappropiate way.

You're dressed in an inappropiate way.

- I'm scared.

- No, it's nothing about scaring.

Everone is looking at you.

- Everyone here can say the same.

- Pili wears this dress a lot of times.

But she wore it in a very different way.

Look at yourself!

- What's wrong?

- This is inappropiate!

This is inappropiate, Tamara.

You're going to ruin our image

and I don't want.

- You like arguing with me!

- No, I don't like arguing with you!

"Centauros" doesn't work this way.

I don't like be arguing with you

all the time. You are a rowdy.

I really think you like

getting into problems.

And you've got a

lot of class and culture.

No, it's not about culture, like you said.

- I'm used to this light.

- Now...

This little wig looks like my natural hair.

- When I wear it...

- It suits very well.

Look at it. It's very funny.

It's completely natural.

And I put it Pantene every night.

I wanted to be an artist.

I appeared on TV, cinema and everywhere.

I've got character,

because I'm a gypsy and I can dance.

And... I have sung and danced her songs.

Not just imitating her, but on my own way.

I like to be myself, understand?

There are places where I have to imitate

and I do it. On my own way.

I also imitate Lolita and Isabel Pantoja.

I imitate Isabel Pantoja on my own way

and dance quite a lot.

I've got a lot of character.

Do you feel yourself a

transvestite or a cross-dresser?

I'm a cross-dresser.

All right. And what is a transvestite?

A transvestite is someone like these girls

who works as a prostitute.

They aren't artists.

Are you an artist?

(INDISTINCT SPEAKING)

(INDISTINCT SPEAKING)

And she earns 20

thousands pesetas every day.

I earn 20 thousand

pesetas in just 4 hours.

Very good, darling, very good!

What do you mean?

Do you own a house? No.

You live just like me.

- I've got a flat.

- But it't not yours!

Working the streets

gives you a lot of money.

But you have to

take quite a lot of risks.

Well, you also take risks

when you go with a client.

No, no. Street is different.

We are artists.

And if a man goes with you, he knows that

he goes with an artist, not with a whore.

But sometimes they didn't pay you!

They had sex with you but didn't pay!

That's because you're worth a lot more.

They aren't.

My sister has got an amazing flat

and lives and dresses much better than us.

Look at her.

She's only 18 and has such class...

And she works in "La Ballesta".

I left home with just 100 pesetas

and the clothes I was wearing.

I've got a flat and a credit card.

You can't deny it.

I've got a great flat!

I've got a great flat!

Because she thinks about her future. But

there are others who only think about luxury.

- In dresses, in makeups...

- Could you give me fire, Toni?

What card, the ration card?

- Yes, yes.

- The pimp card!

This one here once

showed me his credit card

and told me, "For your

information, you queer!"

I had a look at it and it had 2 million.

And it turned out to be a fake!

Two millions! You?

When did you earn two millions?

That is, no wealth and no holiness.

I mean, I left her my credit card

for her to see it.

While I was sleeping, she had a look at it.

I had written a lot of zeros...

My question is:

why the fuck do they call us a "queer"?

- I love being called a queer.

- Don't you know why?

Why?

- It's a rude way.

- You, shut up.

- Listen to me!

- Let Christian speak, please.

I was in the dressing room the other day,

and a group of married couples asked:

"How much is the ticket?"

- "One thousand pesetas."

- For a queer spectacle???

And the woma in charge of the cloak room

answered: "Listen, they are artists."

"You're going to see art."

But to people we're just queers!

But the woman who didn't want to pay

is not a woman.

The woman who answered her is.

They all ultimately believe that!

They all think the same way!

- They all think the same way!

- I don't think so.

Queers were made to be laughed at.

How do you feel better,

being a man or a woman?

I've been a man and I was not comfortable.

I like men quite a lot.

And I had to have hormone treatment.

That's because

you really feel yourself like a woman.

Do you feel yourself

fulfilled or alienated?

How did you feel, fulfilled or alienated?

What?

How did you feel before,

fulfilled or alienated?

At that time, they treated me even better.

When I was a kid, they treated me better.

And how do you see yourself?

More depressed and alienated?

Yes, I feel that way.

As a woman, they alienate you.

As a man, they open up doors.

Even though you are a queer!

There are ministers

and popes who are queers!

We all know that!

I once slept with a diplomat!

A diplomat! Married with children!

And what do you mean?

He said: "I'm with you because

you're a woman". No, I'm a man, honey!

- Would you really like to be a woman?

- No.

If they invented a drug

for not being a homosexual

anymore, would you

put that drug on you?

If I could go unnoticed, I would.

No, sorry. I mean, a drug for not being a

homosexual anymore and being a regular man.

- Being a regular man?

- A heterosexual, like society says.

She laughs because they all are uncultured.

(INDISTINCT SPEAKING)

"She's always been a misunderstood woman!"

"She's always been a misunderstood woman!

And she'd never put that drug on her!"

No, I wouldn't.

Nacho wouldn't. And you wouldn't either.

I wouldn't either.

I'd feel myself a

homosexual deep inside me.

Of course, I couldn't feel

myself a woman either.

A homosexual is the

most perfect person.

It's "this", "that" and

nothing in particular.

Precisely.

And the one who denies

it thinks really the opposite.

He will say "yes" because of people.

- But inside him...

- 90% of men are homosexuals.

They are even married with children.

A lot of us here have

been with married men.

And we had to put up

with it for a long time.

And why did they put up with it?

Because of this.

And it turns out that you've got

a bigger dick than theirs.

What do you like, to fuck or to be fucked?

I like the same as you.

You have to do what the client asks you.

And what if it's a man you really like?

If I really like him, I prefer

to be treated like a girl.

But if it's a client who pays me,

I really don't mind.

No, that's not true. If you like

the man, you prefer to fuck him.

What if the guy waiting for me is also

listening our conversation? He could leave.

I don't like this.

You just want to ruin me.

Your private life is just yours.

I consider myself a woman.

And I've got a flaw, which I can't deny:

a dick, not too big, but a dick.

I can't deny it. But I can't sleep

with a woman. I really can't.

If I decide to have an operation,

I'll have my throat operated.

- Wouldn't you like to get operated?

- No, I wouldn't either.

I know a lot of friends who got operated

and now they are like a furniture.

They don't feel anything. I really

like to be fucked. I mean, anal sex.

My parents hit me very

hard when I was a kid.

He wanted me to get married

and have a lot of children.

And I said, "I can't, daddy."

And then he hit me again.

They hit me very hard.

They thought... I mean,

we gypsies think in a different way.

We can't understand

that thing of homosexuality.

There are not many homosexual gypsies.

My father preferred

two prostitutes to a queer.

He used to say, "I prefer raising

two prostitutes to raising a queer."

We gypsies are very macho.

And have a look at this macho...

Sometimes, when I was home,

our family came to visit us.

I was sleeping or eating

and my parents told me to leave.

I left home before they came in.

When they had gone away,

I went back home.

So, I spent quite a lot of time alone,

making a living by myself.

Once, he hit me because

I told him that I was going to leave home.

He thought that... He

never gave me any money...

I was already working, so I

never asked him for some money.

If I would have asked him for some money,

I would have bought skirts, tight jeans...

My father never gave

me any money because he

didn't want me to buy

that kind of clothes.

So, I began working as a prostitute.

They hit me very hard, very very hard.

Once he told me,

"You're not going out today."

Yes, I have to go out.

"No, you're not going out."

"How's that?

I'm going out because I want to be free."

I started crying and I told him

that I would leave home.

And he said, "You're not leaving home!"

So, I went to my bedroom.

We both pushed the door.

My mum was very afraid.

My sister was holding my father.

He pushed the door, threw me onto the bed

and began hitting me.

He hurt me very badly.

They are like animals when they hit

but I love them very much.

You only have one mother

and she has helped a lot.

After all, I love her so much.

- Hi!

- Hi, Elena, what's up? How are you?

- I've come to see you.

- I know.

You're so pretty.

I'd like a Jack and coke.

- You're so pretty, aren't you?

- As pretty as you.

- You're also very well.

- Really?

Life goes well for me.

- How is your child? - Fine.

- And Jesús? - Fine, too. - I'm glad.

- How are your parents?

- Fine.

We haven't seen each other for a long time.

- Are you going alright?

- Yes, working a lot as usual.

Yes, and life goes

well for you, doesn't it?

Yes. I work as a performer.

You're really very pretty.

You seem very healthy.

- And quite a woman.

- Yes, of course.

- You seem very feminine.

- Really?

- I was always very feminine.

- Yes.

- Don't you think?

- Well, to a certain point.

When we met, you didn't seem so feminine.

You're right.

But, you know, life changes a lot.

At that time I was just 20.

- Hi, Jose.

- Hi, Jesús! How are you?

- I've just asked her about you.

- Look who's here.

How handsome! What's your name?

Is it your son? How beautiful!

- What you couldn't do.

- That's it! What I couldn't do!

I lent you a hand, so don't complain.

It's wonderful!

My name is José Ruiz Orejón Casado.

I was born in La Solana,

in the province of Ciudad Real

on the 8th February 1952.

I had a very happy childhood.

I was always a very well-mannered person.

So, my father loved me very much.

I was very well-mannered because...

I already felt myself a woman.

I used to play with dolls.

When I was 18, I already liked art.

So, I wanted to be an artist.

I began working in a bar, "Argüelles".

People liked me a lot.

I made a lot of friends.

I met there one of the loves of my life,

who was, and is, my wife, of course.

I got married here five years ago.

- I mean...

- Five years ago?

Of course.

I bought my wife the wedding dress.

She was so pretty.

- Did you give her the wedding dress?

- Yes, because I wanted...

I wanted to get myself noticed

because she already knew that I was gay.

So, I wanted to get myself

very much noticed. And I did it.

It was too much, I swear it.

- It's very humble, isn't it?

- Yes, it is.

I was dressed like a man.

When we went out,

everybody was throwing rice at us.

I look at you

and I can't imagine you getting married.

Life changes a lot.

What would you wear

if you got married today?

If I got married today,

I'd dress like a woman.

With a white dressing

and a very long train.

- It was not right what you did.

- What did I do?

I don't know...

I was in love with you.

The proof is that I cared about you...

Well, I wasn't like I am now.

- I was a bit more...

- You were worse.

- Worse?

- Look, this is your father-in-law.

- Do you like him? Do you like him?

- Say, "It's things that happen in life".

I was born this way, but...

I had a... I'm not... I can't explain it.

- You were not like this before, José.

- The way I am now?

- People change.

- You knew I was already a gay.

I met you,

and you gave me a lot of love.

You gave me a lot of love. I was

having a very bad time with my family.

So, I met you when I was 22.

You gave me what I needed.

So, I liked you and I married you.

- But you never gave me what I needed.

- Yes, you're completely right.

- He couldn't. He really couldn't.

- Yes, she's right. You know why?

Because... I... always...

(STAMMERS)

I was in love with you

but I was also going out with a guy.

- I don't know if you knew it.

- Yes, yes.

You knew it.

I always managed very well.

You never knew...

And I made love to this guy...

- But I loved you.

- In my view, you cheated on me.

Cheated on you?

Apart from the fact

that you already were a transvestite...

- I wasn't a transvestite at that time.

- Yes. Yes.

Yes, and you know that I caught you

a lot of times.

Really?

You had had to tell me before

and we've been true friends.

- But...

- If you had told me,

"Elena, here's the thing."

If you accept it, right.

Otherwise, we'll have to break up.

But you know that you behaved very badly.

Then, when I began my relationship

with Jesús,

you acted in a very bad faith.

- No, I mean...

- Yes, José, and you know it.

No, I just wanted to be with you again,

but... I never disturbed him in any way...

I'd have left you long before.

But I felt tied to your family.

I was very scared of your family.

And that's what tied me.

- My family never hurt you or anything.

- But I was scared of them.

All right. Maybe you were

very young and didn't know...

I didn't know what was to love someone

to a certain point.

- Yes, you're right.

- I never really loved you.

Yes, you're right.

And I know it now

that I really love Jesús.

My marriage failed because...

It wasn't my fault.

And I think it wasn't her fault either.

What's your name?

What's your name?

I'd have changed a

lot if I had had a baby.

Now, I don't know

very well. It's difficult.

And, you know, I

really love children a lot.

I really love them.

I've seen my brothers growing up...

I feel a bit sad at this moment

because the person who doesn't love

a child is not human.

A child is everything for a family.

Understand?

When I go to my brother's,

and he is a bit angry

when coming back from work,

then his child gives him a kiss,

and so on...

So...

I'd have loved it but now I can't.

What are you talking about now?

We were talking about our opinion

about police.

What?

You were never arrested.

What do you think about police?

As I was never arrested,

I think they have to be respected.

I can't have a bad opinion.

If there were no police, we wouldn't exist.

I think that police is just like us.

- Your sister was in prison.

- No, she's never been in jail.

Well, at least you've been arrested.

Doesn't it hurt you?

A minister or any other person

can be arrested.

Doesn't it hurt you that she's been

arrested because she's a transvestite?

- You are just like her.

- Wait a moment.

She was in jail many times

because...

She is a transvestite...

And because she's a whore.

I don't know. I really don't know.

They looked at her ID

and saw that she was a transvestite.

- But you know that your sister is a whore.

- Yes, I do.

She works in a very famous place.

- No, she began working in...

- In Ballesta Street.

In Ballesta Street and

in El Valverde Street.

And she worked for just

one thousand pesetas.

She's much more sluttier than us.

We get paid 5-10 thousand pesetas.

We are high-class whores.

She's a cheap whore.

- But she's also a whore.

- That's it. A whore.

***

I love him very much.

He's just 18.

And if he follows my steps,

but not my steps for art.

I mean, my steps in life,

if he can follow my steps in life,

which he can do, because at his age,

he's surpassed me in everything.

Well, not in everything.

He can dress very appropriately.

And I admire him.

You've got to save the money you earn,

and buy a house in the future.

For example, I never worked the streets.

So, I neved had that problem.

Maybe that's why I'm happier.

I finish my performance and come back home.

- Yes, but you know...

- I also have a drink here at home and...

Yes, but you know, I've had

a very bad time with the police,

I'm fed up with this life.

I earn a lot of money...

You can change now.

I can give you some numbers

for your performance.

You can earn a lot of money, too.

You have your drinks here...

This is my life.

I'm earing a lot of money right now...

And I want to take advantage of it...

What do you want so many dresses for?

- What do you want so many dresses for?

- Because I like being well-dressed.

All right, but you can buy a dress

of 4 thousand pesetas instead of one of 10.

- You know that when I like a dress...

- Yes.

Yes, you buy it, put it on once

and then throw it.

- I can't understand...

- You live your life and I live mine.

I just want you to be safe and go well.

I don't mind if you have lovers

as long as you behave well.

I mean, you have to behave well

with people and so on.

Oh, how beautiful!

Can't you remember this game?

I used to play it when I was a kid.

Let me, please, let me.

I love it!

(INDISTINCT SPEAKING)

This is too much!

This is my parents' restaurant.

Let's come in.

Wait a moment.

I'll get myself gorgeous.

This is my father.

- How do you do?

- How do you do?

- How do you do?

- How do you do?

This is my mother.

- I'm glad to meet you.

- Glad to meet you.

Cristian is my guest this afternoon.

I've come with him so he can meet you.

I'm very happy to see your family together.

I haven't seen my family for 4-5 years.

- Do you usually get together?

- Yes.

Usually on Sundays, above all.

We also go hunting in the morning!

Then Master Solano here sings

twenty songs.

- Do you usually miss José?

- Yes, of course.

Don't think that we miss him so much...

I'm very happy that...

I'm very excited....

...to see the whole family together.

I can see that you all are very natural.

- Are you happy to see your son?

- Of course I am.

I'm very happy to see the family together.

How beautiful!

- My father loves me very much.

- Are you also happy to see your grandson?

- Of course I am.

- Very much, I see.

- How old are you? You seem very young.

- I'm 86 years old.

86 years old!

Three years older than me.

I mean, I'm very good for my age.

Grandmum, you were also 86 last year!

She's just like Sara Montiel.

I think she wants to be a movie star.

- Are you his cousin?

- I'm his only cousin.

What do you think about his life?

I'm very happy with him.

I like him to be an artist.

How nice of you.

I really like the way he

dresses and everything.

I'm not wearing a lot of clothes today.

When I come to see you, you know,

I don't want to seem a star.

I mean, I'm not really a star.

I'm a person just like you

who works every night.

And that's my life.

But you're really an artist.

When I come to act here in Alcobendas,

I want to take my father and my brother,

who is going to get himself noticed.

- You seem very stiff, aren't you?

- No, I'm not.

I'm not stiff at all.

- I'm always happy.

- That's good.

José talks a lot about you.

- Of course, I'm his mother.

- Come here, Miguel Ángel.

Make him some way.

- Who's this boy?

- He's my youngest brother.

- Tell Cristian how old you are.

- I'm 11.

- How old?

- 11.

He's my father's bodyguard.

- Really?

- Yes, he's the number one here.

- What's your name?

- Miguel Ángel.

Miguel Ángel.

What do you think about your brother?

- I like the way he is.

- You like the way he is.

- Have you ever seen him working?

- No.

What's that? Didn't

you see me in the bar?

Oh, yes.

- Do you like the way he works?

- Yes.

- Do your friends ask you about him?

- Yes, sometimes.

- What do you tell them?

- "He's an artist."

"He likes acting a lot.

He likes... a lot..."

Bingo!

- And he likes drinking!

- What? Drinking?

Drinking a lot.

I like drinking, and you know the place

I like to go to have a drink.

All right, apart from being your father's

bodyguard, you watch your sister.

- No, he watches just my father.

- I watch my father because he sometimes...

And now father is going to dedicate me a

song, a song for all the mothers in the world.

I've got a litte cold.

Never mind. We're in family,

no matter what people say.

We're in family.

Let's keep silent.

(SINGING IN SPANISH)

Hello. Good morning, Eva.

You've got an official subpoena

for the military service.

I mean, you have to go tomorrow

because it is a very serious thing.

- But...

- You have to turn up just like yourself.

You go to the town hall,

you go home first.

You go to the town hall and tell them...

I mean, they'll see it at once.

- They'll notice your breasts.

- I'm a bit scared.

Why scared? You didn't anything wrong.

You go home first, and tell your parents

to go with you.

Nothing will go wrong.

They'll examine you or...

There will no problem at all.

I did military service.

I did it before having my operation.

I had my operation after military service.

That's when my life was modern and happy.

Mr. Ángel Ruiz Orejón Casado?

- Are you Mr. Ángel Ruiz Orejón?

- Yes, sir.

Could I have your ID?

- Your first surname?

- Ruiz.

- Your second surname is Casado, right?

- Yes.

- Your name?

- Ángel.

- Birthplace?

- La Solana.

- Pardon?

- La Solana.

- Province?

- Ciudad Real.

- Birthdate?

- 12th of May, 1964.

- Your father's name.

- Pedro.

- Your mother's name?

- Angelines.

- Religion?

- Single.

- Religion. Catholic?

- No. - No religion.

- Marital status?

- Single.

- Can you read and write?

- Yes.

- What's your regular job?

- Artist.

Very well.

Here you are your ID.

Take off your shoes, please.

Here.

Keep your head steady.

Get near to the bar.

You can put on your shoes.

- Ángel Ruiz Orejón?

- Yes, sir.

- Are you sure?

- Yes, I am.

All right, take off your blouse.

- How long have you had your looks?

- For a year and a half.

Raise your arms.

Breathe.

As much as you can.

Exhale.

Good.

You can get dressed.

Sit down.

Did you get operated?

- Are you going to do it?

- No.

- Are you planning to do it?

- No.

I couldn't stand the military service but

it was compulsory at that time with Franco.

They sent me to Tarifa.

I will never forget

when I arrived in Tarifa.

In Las Palomas island.

It was such a foggy day

that you couldn't see anything.

And that impressive lighthouse...

My world fell apart.

I can't say which place was worse.

We had to go out on the second day.

I went with another fairy

called "La pandereta".

We both turned up... completely fairy.

We had plucked our eyebrows.

The whole village looked at us.

The village looked like the Corpus Christi.

The whole village was... The Lieutenant

saw us. I can't remember his name...

Lieutenant Villalón.

He saw us, we got arrested

and they shaved our head bald.

Just because they wanted us to be men.

They said that we were a disgrace

for the Army.

So, I answered him that we didn't want

to do military service.

There was a lot of respect there.

They called you at the time of falling in.

I remember this funny fairy.

"La pandereta". They would

call him, "José Campo Ayala".

And he answered with

that voice, "Present!".

Once we had to do guard duty

by the front door.

All hell broke loose. It was the inauguration

of the statute of Guzmán El Bueno.

It was such a windy day

that I don't know how the wind

didn't blow us queers away to Gibraltar.

I remember that we left the musket

on the ground.

So, as it was very cold,

we went to have a coffee to a café.

When we got back to the barracks,

back again to the cell!

So, we spent all the time in the cell.

Imagine that Lore, or Lorenzo,

goes to work in a factory tomorrow,

and you are dressed like a woman,

and your workmates tell you:

"Lorenzo, how can you be dressed

like this?" What would you do?

- What would you do?

- Listen to me.

Go back to the street dressed

like a woman where your partners

treat you like a woman,

just like you feel.

They say that I'm very old,

that I got my breast operated.

"Look at Loren's tits."

"I'm a gypsy, illiterate".

Why? I couldn't go to school.

Because I know to behave

wherever I go, so they like me.

Not like you. They're

scolding you all the day

because you don't even

know how to get dressed.

- Who likes you?

- Nobody.

Apart from your family,

nobody here likes you.

Why not?

Of course you don't!

We're all false people and scoundrels!

You're right, Tamara.

Why such a burden that God has given us?

The word itself describes it.

PIECE OF FAG!

PIECE OF FAG!

My dream is to get my breasts operated

and be successful in everything.

In cinema, television, in everything.

I'll stay at home,

or I'll go to my village,

because my mother has a house there, and

I've also got a flat in Jerez de la Frontera.

I dream about being famous in the future.

I'd like to meet a guy who loves me

and I would love him,

because I'm tired of having just affairs

and I don't want to be alone in the future.

I've had a real love,

he's very far away from Spain.

I mean, I still have.

He's still on my mind.

Because this man I'm talking about,

and I feel like crying,

he hurt me a lot,

althought he didn't know that he hurt me,

and I loved him.

The more he hurt me, the more I loved him.

I still love him, although we broke up

long time ago.

He left but I still love him.

He's on my mind.

It's like a curse

that I can't get out of my mind.

I love him forever.

He's the only one I love.

He's abroad.

He's in... abroad.

Dear Mum,

I hope you all are well

and I also hope you can forgive me

for not having let you

know about me before.

But I couldn't for several reasons.

One of the reasons,

and the most important one,

is what drives me to write this letter.

I hope you can undestand

what I'm going to explain to you.

And I hope you accept it.

Otherwise, please,

mum, at least try to undestand me.

I really don't know where to begin.

I'm 21 years old,

and if memory serves me well,

I realised that I wasn't like the rest

of people since I was 14.

Well, I knew that before.

You surely remember that when I was a kid

I preferred staying at home helping you

to going out with friends.

But it was at 14-15, when

I began working in the hairdresser,

that I realised that I liked

boys more than girls.

So, I began going out with them.

Of course, I never did anything wrong.

Then, I came to Madrid, rented a flat

with two friends and knew people like me.

With the same problems.

I found out that I was not alone.

So, since I was so confused,

I decided to go to a doctor.

He explained to me that my body

has more masculine hormones.

He also told me not to worry very much

because there were a lot of people like me.

From that moment on, I've lived more peaceful.

I'm all right, but I've changed a lot.

So has my looks and appearance.

I live and feel like a woman does.

And I'm beginning to be happy.

I regret to upset you,

since I know the way you think.

I've tried to hide it from you

because I didn't want you to worry.

I'd give anything not to give

such bad news

but I couldn't go on like this.

I hope you'll try to understand me.

I know this is very difficult

for you to accept,

but at least try to understand me.

I'm your son and I'll always be.

Of course it's not my fault

to be a man outside;

since I am and feel myself a woman inside.

Try to understand me, please, mum.

I love you. René.