Dead Frequency (2010) - full transcript

(Radio jingle).

106.8 FM Newcastle Talk Radio.

Well if you are out and about in Newcastle

tonight it's a balmy early morning twelve degrees

and later today the temperature is set to hit twenty-five degrees.

(Radio jingle).

This Sam Stuart your night-time host

on Newcastle Talk Radio.

Thanks to Jane for her story about the pigeons in the city.

Next we have Pam on the line

from London.

I can hear the damn pigeons.They are in the loft now.

I can Hear them, I can.

E been feeding them haven't you Pam?

You know you only have yourself to blame.

Everyone thinks this is funny.

But what should I do with them?

We have an email here from Mark in Birtley.

Apparently they go well on toast.

See what I mean Sam?

So what else is going on in

London tonight?

I'm surprised we are getting

all these pigeon calls.

Well people are for them or

against them.

There is passion here Sam. We

are Londoners.

Well we are certainly hearing a lot about them tonight.

How did you come across us?

How did you find us?

I thought you would never ask!

Now you don't want me saying what we have in common on air do you?

No one would believe me anyway.

I see. Well Pam that will be our little secret.

Thanks for calling.

We will have to leave it there as we are

now coming up to the two-am news.

After the news we have Geoff Stuart to see you through to five-am.

I'll be back tonight at eleven.

Take care, see you then.

- Hi.

- Hiya.

- How was the show?

- Good, good.

Any problems?

No no, none at all.

Loads of calls about pigeons though.

Alright okay. See you.

E you did something around here.

I'll have a cuppa please. Tea one sugar.

You cheeky git. I never stop!

What do you mean you never stop?

Of hours at the radio station.

You do sod-all round here.

Do you know how stressful my

job is?

Stress? You don't know the

meaning of the word.

You ought to try walking the streets round here through the day.

What are you a man or a mouse?

Squeak.

Y it's not that it's stressful.

It's just those staff

just give me such grief.

There is something not right with those kids.

Kids exactly!

You are getting stressed over a bunch of kids!

It's not that it's just...

They know who's boss.They know

I lead, it's just...

Something's not right.

I just can't put my finger on it.

You don't let me get away with

anything round here

so how the bloody hell can you let a bunch of kids get the best of you?

You don't understand. And that

Emily. What a bitch!

What do you mean a bitch?

How can you not control them?

The way you go on at me it's a miracle

you let them get away with anything.

Its not that. They know who the

boss is.

They know I'm a manager. They

know I lead.

It's just something is not

right with them.

I will get to the bottom of

it. I really will.

Ok at the way you are going on. I can't believe you.

Getting stressed over a couple of kids.

You don't understand. Honestly.

It's just weird.

Cheeky little bastards that

they are!

Afternoon boss.

Alright Billy.

Come in I have a few jobs I need you to sort out for me today.

So don't worry about that

footballer.

I'll call it with the boys and girls,

it will be sorted.

Ht okay.

When you have done that will you call at Mrs Anderson's as well?

If she doesn't pay today grab the telly,

the DVD, anything.

She needs to pay something

today.

Number twenty-three isn't it?

- Yeah.

- Alright done.

Okay. See you later pal.

I don't know you only spend a couple

of hours at that bloody radio station.

Why don't you spend a couple of hours cleaning this place up?

I mean look at the state of it!

Roger.

What now?

You couldn't get us a top-up

could you?

You are a cheeky git.

I can't believe the front you've got.

That little twerp Wayne had better of passed on the message on.

That fucking radio station.

Bastards.

Good morning.

This is Jess Edwards.

Your early morning agony aunt.

Feel free to call in about your personal and private problems.

Before I forget Diane wants all

here.

Six o'clock tomorrow morning.

She's a right cow.

I hate getting away this late.

It's the sun. Gives us headaches.

Same here. Don't worry. I won't

be arsed.

Oh you're so strong Sam!

She's a stuck up cow anyway.

Let her come in to meet shit.

I'm with you.

I'm owed time and if I'm not I

probably should be.

You're joking! Sam she'll do

her nut.

You already missed her first poxy meeting on Wednesday.

She did say there are going to

be some changes

so we are either for her or

against her.

Nothing important then.

Anyway I'm going to go or this will start to seem like work.

You twats!

I'm stuck covering the desk until Tom 'till six-am.

Emily's been off for a long

time.

Oh yeah!

Give me strength.

Just be your usual charming

self Wayne.

Come in with me Sam.

It's not a good idea.

I'll see you later.

You can't keep denying you love

me Sam.

I won't let you.

Look I don't want to hurt you

and I'm good at doing that to

people.

Look I know you're divorced.

But I know how you really feel.

Sam you don't fool me.

I'm not trying to fool you.

I would be no good for you.

Let me decide on that.

Come in with me Sam please.

Look don't do this Emily. I

can't.

Who do they think they are!

No one messes with me.

Sodding bloody Newcastle Talk

Radio Station.

Bloody bunch of arseholes.

Bloody sick of that bloody

place.

Bloody pig sick of the bunch of

cheeky bastards.

No one messes with me.

Stupid twatting birds!

Shit and bird seed all over the bloody place.

All these bloody weeds

everywhere.

I can't bloody get rid of them

all.

I'm sick and tired of this.

I don't believe it!

Just tell us if they give you

any more shit babe.

Nobody, but nobody messes with

my woman.

Leave them to me.

You're just a debt collector.

I'm a manager and I lead.

Now just you remember that.

Now take that twit Billy with you and go and collect some debts.

After all how else is a woman

supposed to live.

Are where exactly are those two?

Don't tell me they are not here?

I take it you told them like I

said?

Yeah they send their love.

Do you think you're funny.

Now let me explain.

That was a rhetorical question so don't try and answer me back.

Now you may be thick,

so let me explain this slowly

for you little boy.

I run this place!

Not you, not him and not his

floozy.

Emily and Sam you mean?

Who else?

Make it my business to find out what deviance is going on around here

and then I rout it out.

Okay, okay.

Oh sorry I didn't realise you

were mentally retarded.

Helps to work here.

Work!

You don't have a girl do you?

Well you won't be getting one

either,

because who would want some soon to be out of work looser like you?

I take that's formal notice of

end of our contract is it?

Just tell them I will be in later tonight because what I have to say

will make it so worth while.

Bye then.

Just whose diseased prick did

you dribble off the end of?

Do you know someone has left another paper cup over there?

I keep telling them about that.

No one gets away with showing

disrespect to me

No one!

Just who the fuck so you think

you are?

Mr Clarkson?

- Sir?

- What is your report?

It's in hand Sir.

In hand? What do you mean it's

in hand?

It's just that they don't scare

easily.

Look I can't make it much

clearer.

I didn't send you in there for

your pretty face.

I'm sick of this undercover

crap.

All we do is chase shadows.

I bet they are not anyway.

Use your personality disorder and that misfit boyfriend you picked up

and push them to expose their

secret.

What about my safety if they

are?

Well I take it you're prepared?

Oh Yes.

Then if our suspicions are confirmed you know what to do.

Sergeant Handyside?

Yeah look she is stressed and

under pressure.

Let's increase surveillance.

I want to really know what is going on in there.

This will swipe the smirk off

their face.

Roger. It's me.

Forget what I said earlier.

I've got a job for you.

Take down this address.

Another day shift again.

I much prefer nights.

I know we have adapted to the day but

I would rather work a night anytime.

Ah look Kevin stop whinging

will you?

Look we've all got to go to work you know.

Day or night shift.

We are going out tomorrow. I

can't wait.

Well you could look forward to

it. I mean

I've been planning for ages and

I've spent a lot of money.

Whatever.

I'm off to work.

I love you.

See you then.

Haway then.

What's the matter?

Looks as if you have been

crying.

I'm alright it's nothing.

Well clearly there is

something.

So what's the matter then?

Nothing I'm fine.

Bollocks.

Look it's just Kevin.

You are not happy are you?

No not really it's what I thought it was going to be to be honest.

Doing wrong? What's the matter?

- Oh what is he doing right?

I thought things were happy

anyway?

Well so did I.

But?

I don't know.

I've just got other things going on in my mind.

And he hasn't even done anything wrong it's me being just...

What?

Awful to him all the time.

And he's trying his best and everything

he does just irritates more and more.

You don't want to be with him

do you?

I'm not being funny but I've

noticed it myself.

Ou're not happy. If you are not

happy you are going to have to.

You are just going to have to

tell him.

Because it's not fair on you

and to be honest with you it's

not fair on him either.

He's trying his best as well but he must know there's something wrong.

Like when he left just then before you came he didn't even like call in

to the kitchen to say goodbye or give us a kiss or anything.

But then that's my fault

because

I'm not really encouraging him to come and kiss us and cuddle us.

He probably thinks I'll bite is head off or something but...

But why?

What are you being nasty to him for then is it just..

I don't know I feel like a bit

...

Can I be honest with you?

It might be kinda a bit of a

long shot.

But I think you still have

feelings for Sam.

It's just the way you are with him.

I personally I can see it.

E you are not happy with Kevin.

I know you are not happy with Kevin.

I'm not happy with Kevin but I

mean...

Do you still like Sam though?

Say anything.

Honestly it will not go no further or anything like that.

I know that might sound

terrible but

honestly just the way you are

around each other.

And you have got such a nasty aggression towards Emily.

Kevin was a perfect option for

us then

and he's exactly like that now.

So it seems strange that I want to

go back to something that I

wanted to leave.

Probably 'cause you just wanted a change

and now you have had that change.

I'll be honest with you it's

not for the better like.

It's just tink he is a bit of a

bore.

Tries to... he resites poems.

- Sorry I know that sound horrible but...

Which I know some people find

lovely.

But you know me,

I'm not that type of lovey-dovey person...

Don't you think he is boring?

Haway!

He's not boring, he's stable.

Describe him as a stable person.

- Stable? He's a lunatic.

But he would make someone a lovely husband.

But just not me.

Bastards!

You stupid person don't you

know which way

- you are going!

- I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

I'm sorry!

I'll get you!

I'll get you!

Bitch!

It's really nice. A nice view.

Ah it's beautiful. A beautiful

city.

The bridge looks good from here.

I've never been here before.

Well I said I was going to

give you an experience today.

It's a nice spoon.

Is that an ashtray?

No. They are baking tins.

Alright I thought it looked

like an ashtray.

Is that used?

No it's for you when your going

round.

Alright. Who uses video?

Oh loads of people.

That's another twenty pounds!

Hiya. Can I get some beef liver

please?

Yes certainly how much would

you like?

Just a pound.

One-seventeen please.

Well shall we go to the Baltic

next?

Yeah, if you want.

Do you want to go for some drinks or something?

I'm so glad.

Really I put a lot of expense and thought into it.

Yes it was really nice Kevin.

It's been a lovely day for it. Nice weather.

Are you okay? You seem not with

me.

Kevin I'm fine. I'm just tired

that's all.

I've been really busy at work

and

you just keep asking us questions and trying too hard.

We are all busy at work though.

I know I am busy.

Yeah well right. You know, lets

just enjoy today.

And just stop asking us so many questions.

Let's just leave it.

I just don't think that you are

totally with me today.

I just think your mind's in a

different place.

I think you are thinking about

something else.

Or maybe even somebody else.

Well what is that supposed to

mean?

Nothing forget I ever said it.

- No come on come on what's that supposed to mean?

Nothing, it doesn't matter.

Kevin you can't say something

like that

and not expect me to ask what

you're talking about.

Well no come on Kevin!

No I didn't mean it.

Kevin you can't say something

like that

and then expect me just to not ask what you are talking about.

You are thinking about him

aren't you?

About who?

You know who. I'm not even

going to say his name.

Right well Kevin we may as well just cancel the whole day now

because I'm not going to walk around all day with you

knowing that you think I'm apparently thinking about someone else.

It I've got other stuff planned.

- Right well put your card on the table.

At is the matter? What's wrong?

Who am I supposed to be thinking about.

I think you are thinking about

Sam.

What like my ex-husband Sam?

There's only one Sam isn't

there?

Are you, you are not serious?

Are you serious Kevin?

Very serious.

Are you actually serious?

Yeah. I'm serious. I've said it.

Do you really think I would have gone through all that crap with him

getting divorced to get with you and

be with you now here today married.

If I wanted to be with Sam?

Well I just think I'm always

trying my best.

Well that's it you are always trying and trying and trying.

Can you not just live for the

moment.

And enjoy each other rather than constantly be on me back all the time?

Ways feel like I am second best.

- You are not second best to anyone Kevin.

To him.

Kevin look right yes I've got

feelings for Sam.

Of course I've got feelings for

Sam

we used to be married for years

and you know

but it's not like I have got

for you.

Know it is really good as well.

I'm really glad that you are friends.

Well good because it is just

friendship.That's all.

I'm glad I'm glad you're

friends.

Well I hope you are.

I don't want to feel uncomfortable

around Sam every time we are

together.

Well I think of him as one of

my best friends anyway.

Well if you think like that

then I don't understand

why you would have these

thoughts?

He's like a brother to me.

Really.

I love him.

Really.

I love him.

Sorry.

You are. You are allowed to

smile.

Sam.

You know you changed me all

those years ago?

Well, why did you do it?

I was cruel then.

I'm so sorry.

Are you really sorry?

Because we wouldn't be here now.

Emily, Emily, I don't...

You just need to be able to show your feelings Sam.

I know how much it hurts for you to open up your heart.

Is where the little twat lives.

Let's just get this over with.

How can anyone live in a shit

hole like this?

He needs a slapping for that alone.

It's not bleeding natural.

Aw bugger off!

You just want me to put

frighteners on him boss?

Can't we give him a good kicking while you are at it?

Suits me. You see that is the

trouble with women.

A thousand words where one

would do.

They get into these boss jobs.

And then need us men to sort out the mess for them.

Don't you diss my women either.

Sorry boss. Only joking!

Yes, me too.

So we don't owe him then boss?

Oh he owes me alright.

Anyone who dissis my woman dissis me.

Yeah that is right out of order

boss!

Right this is his hole.

Watch what you are treading in.

Wayne eh?

It is Yeah.

Hello Sonny. Who's been a

cheeky boy then?

We knows what happens to cheeky

boys don't we?

To be honest I think you've got

the wrong place.

Wrong place you little shite!

It's the wrong fucking place

alright!

That's what I thought. Okay?

You diss my women and now

you're dissing me!

What he's your woman?

Diane was right.

You are a little twerp who needs a big lesson!

Are so you're Diane's new bloke.

He's doing it again boss.

Do you think there's something wrong with him?

There's something wrong with

him alright.

Okay.

Next time you pop round yeah?

I'll tell you what let us know and I'll put the kettle on for you alright?

Aw I told you to bugger off

and that wouldn't have happened.

Daft old git.

I bet it's going to busy again

tonight.

Fighting, drugs, O.D.'s.

It'll be the same usual Friday

night.

Yeah you said before. It's

always getting busier.

Something has been odd though.

Since that new manager Diane came in.

Yeah I want to find out about

her.

Do you think Sam can keep

control there?

Well he had better.

I don't want Diane finding out anything.

Look the pub's just up here

I'll just pull in.

I'll not be long.

Just pull in.

Hi.

You still making a bit of a

habit of this then?

Of course.

And anyone would think we were still married.

So how's Dr Dolittle?

Kevin? Well he is worried.

Look in a way we are still

married.

And any problem for you is problem for me and the rest.

Problem? There's no problem.

What?

So you think getting pissed before work is normal?

It helps when I think about

what I am.

What we all are. So why are you

here?

Look I know you love Emily.

Why don't you just admit it?

You were strong once.

Strong I can't handle it.

I don't want the feeling. Not

again.

It's like a sickness.

Your emotions will get us all

found out!

Look Emily's young and naive just keep her at a distance.

And keep off the bottle.

You always were melodramatic

Jenny.

What do you know about Diane?

Stuff her! She's no threat.

Watch my lips - Diane.

Why a new manager so soon?

What's her agenda. Are they

onto us?

I can handle it. We all just

ignore her.

Are you listening to me?

Do I have a choice?

So what if they find out?

What! It's unthinkable!

New jobs, new identities.

Owing favours to other cells

like us?

Shit happens!

Me and Kevin don't want to be

doing a runner.

And neither do you Wayne or

Emily.

Look just cut the denial and

cut the drink now!

Just cool it.

There's no problem I haven't dealt with before.

New managers have come and

gone.

She's different Sam. Under

stress people crack!

Why a change in management so

soon?

Look I'll keep an eye on things.

Well lets meet tomorrow.

Let's not.

Get a grip Sam. Look I'm off.

Take care.

Same again Bob.

And another for the plant.

Sorry mate I owe you one.

The boss wanted me to meet her new bloke and I was a little held up.

You three live in such a dodgy

place I'm surprised

you are here in one piece never mind late.

And Diane's got it in for you.

Isn't she cute?

For God's sake Emliy I'm going on the sodding air in a minute.

I'm trying to run a show love.

A fate worse than death Wayne

pet.

Thanks to Jonathan Miles for

the news at one-am.

So how's the news affect you?

Petrol prices increase but electric cars are as hard to get as ever.

Sorry about that folks.

Diane our new station manager was attacking me.

But I've put her back in her

cage.

So are you being ripped off or have you found a different way around?

Started cycling perhaps? Ring

in to have your say.

Give us a shag.

Stop it Emily this is getting

serious.

I am serious.

John has emailed us.

He says the future is in air

compression cars.

Well they should certainly go

with a bang.

Well thanks for calling Dave.

It's now coming up to two-am.

And we will be going across to the news with Johnathan Miles.

After that Jess Edwards will be here with you through to five-am.

From me goodnight.

Now give us a shag.

No and that's my last word.

You just have to unwrap me.

No we've got to be

professional.

The lives of our group are at

stake.

I've got no knickers on.

Go on Harder!

- Harder you bastard!

- Fuck!

Harder you bastard.

What the?

PIss off bitch he hasn't

finished yet!

Do you know what the hell

they're doing in there?

Er yeah. I kinda grasped the

concept at school.

Biology I think.

You're both finished!

In fact you can both get the hell out of here right now!

Don't you dare stop or I'll

claw you to pieces.

You filthy little cow! Get out

of here! Come on get out!

Get out!

Get out!

Oh I am sorry Sam.

You should be I will tell them to sack you on Monday.

You don't need to sorry.

That was one of the best shags I've had in a long time.

That does it! Absolutely does

it!

You pigs!

Deprives filthy pigs!

No wonder you all live in such a shithole!

And Roger told me about you trying it on with him and Billy!

What were you on?

Ll be back you know!

And I won't need to sack you because you are already dead!

Don't you pick on him cow!

Get out of here you little slut!

Go on. Get out!

Don't any of you think about

going after her.

She can go to hell! You all can!

On Monday you're all history!

Dead air! Dead air!

Rejoice! Thank you so much!

You've all been wonderful!

Sorry. I'm so sorry.

Sorry!

Sorry I'm so sorry!

Sorry I'm so sorry.

What's happened to you Emily?

I messed up.

Sorry.

Tell me. What's happened?

It's Diane.

I lost control.

I bit her.

It's alright. You're okay now.

Yeah but I've messed up haven't

I?

We are all going to have to go

and run away again.

And hide.

I'm so sorry.

Come on. Let's go inside and

get you sorted.

Look at the bloody time you've been

there for half the bloody day already.

Is that blood? What's happened?

Come on!

Oi!

Is that blood on you?

What the bloody hell has happened to you what have you been doing?

Who's done this to you?

Come on tell me! I want to know now!

E you going to tell me or what?

What's happening what's been going on?

Are you going to tell me who's done this to you or what?

I'll sort the bastards.

Just let me know who's done this to you.

What's going...

I don't believe it you filthy

skank!

The state of that!

The state of you! Come on!

What's been going on?

There's no need for that. Look

at the clip of you?

Blood everywhere!

Something's happened are you going

to tell me what's been going on or not?

Eh?

What the... What the f...

Yoink!

Stop! Give it back!

No man, come and get me!

Aargh!

Thanks.

There you go.

Thanks very much.

How did you manage to catch him

as quick?

Probably smokes.

Now are you alright for getting home?

I am but why don't you come and have

a cup of tea with me and a biscuit?

Alright then. Come on.

He got it off us because he somehow just appeared behind me.

Scary.

It's okay.

He's showed us up. All of us.

It's alright we will get him

back.

No it's not he showed us up.

- It's okay we'll get him back.

- No it's not he showed us up!

We are going to get him and

that old lady back.

I know where she lives.

We are going to get that lady

and get her boyfriend.

Let's go guys.

Would you like another biscuit?

No I've really got to be

going.

Go on have another biscuit.

Go on just have one more.

Alright then. Thank you.

Come on old lady! Come on old

lady! Come out!

What's that?

Oh it's not them hoodies again

is it?

Haway lads lets gan!

Coming to get you!

This was my husband's favourite

one.

Come out!

Oh she's got a golf club!

- It's me.

- It's about time. Where've you been?

Look you said you wanted to

speak to us.

What is it?

Well Wayne said that Diane

caught you and Emily.

How can you do that?

Do you know what that does to

me?

We're divorced remember?

I told you to show your feeling

Sam.

Not just fuck her at work!

We didn't plan it. It just

happened.

It's not Diane's feelings I'm

worried out it's us.

I'm not going back to a

bohemian existence for anyone!

I hope you don't mind me joining you two,

but I could hear you upstairs.

I was just telling Sam how

stupid he is!

Why do you never listen to

anything?

I need some fucking sleep!

For God's sake!

Us mortals got work in the morning.

For crying out loud I just wish you could just fucking piss off!

Who's that?

Does she know about us?

That's Ann. That's our lodger.

She's very discreet.

It's one of is ex-patients.

For fuck's sake Jenny!

You talk to me about taking risks!

We have all just got to keep our heads

clear and hopefully this will all blow over.

All it takes is one silver bullet.

One fire, one mob attack.

Yeah we do recover from

injuries but there is a limit.

That's what I have to tell you.

There's a reason why I came here alone.

And what's that?

Well I didn't want you going

for Emily.

Stop being cryptic Sam.

What are you trying to say?

Emily's bitten Diane.

E has recovered really quickly.

She is one of us now.

The stupid bitch!

The stupid little bitch.

We don't even know if she's one of the hunters.

She was with them. She came to

speak to me.

How can you be talking so calmy

about this?

Doesn't the prospect of no longer being the sodding undead

and being in the dead bother

you?

Hey! I know you don't I?

You're that little slut from the radio station.

Where's Wayne?

Come on!

You go around like a bunch of school kids.

Tell us where he is and we

might leave you alone.

You heard the boss, speak up or

get a slapping!

What's this? Been shopping have

we girlie?

Aargh! That's disgusting!

What kind of bird are you?

Well I've had a bad day

and I needed some comfort food.

You cheeky little bitch! That

does it!

Get her guys!

Viv get her!

Go on! Go on Girlie!

Go on!

Bitch.

You sort her! Go on!

Come on get her!

What are you waiting for man!

It's only a woman! Kill her!

Go on you whimp get in!

Hello Two this is Sunray.

We have a situation. Meet at

R.V.

seven-hundred-zulu over.

(Over radio).

Two received, out.

Sunray out.

How's your woman boss!

None of your sodding business!

Sorry Billy.

S in a strange mood.

She's been hanging round the bedroom being all feisty, being odd.

I don't know what's up with

her.

Now if you reflect back on what

you've done,

would you say you have learned

anything?

Sorry Sam.

Well at least you didn't have a

nibble this time!

Well Diane was fitter.

Yeah, I suppose so.

Where are you going?

- The station.

- You're early.

I know I've got to plan for

the show. See you later.

Want a beer?

No thanks boss that's enough

for me.

Get them sunglasses off and get us something to eat will you?

Aw that's foul!

I think she is on the stuff too

boss!

You can cut that crap out right

now.

Shit! Not again!

Not again!

Hey it's been a bad day boss.

What the frigging hell are they

all on!

Bloody hell I know red meat can be good for you but that's ridiculous.

I don't fancy any of that boss.

Me sodding car!

H it Sam! They're all the same.

- Can you hear that?

Country's going to pieces mate.

- Me belly!

Hanging around in gangs!

Drinking and smoking pot.

Loutish and indecent behaviour!

Simon, I must clarify that he was only arrested for being drunk.

And there no evidence that the rest of the Cabinet were involved.

But they are supposed to be

running the country!

No wonder unemployment and house repossessions are so high!

They blame the global

recession and the bankers.

You are probably spot on there.

- Filthy druggy wasters!

As drunk as skunks!

Shoot them all that's I say!

- Okay well thanks for your call. Do call again.

Not too soon.

What a tosser!

Does he not know

what's like to have a problem?

He's the one that should be

shot.

Fuck him!

What are we going to do with

that Sam?

Have you kept giving her coffee

like I said?

Well what's wrong with her?

She's the best station manager

we've ever had!

Pissed out of her box

twenty-four seven.

Suits me.

Emily you are going to have to look at the wider picture.

I mean think of the reaction

peoples going to have

when they, you know,

find out that we and she are all vampires.

I've been trying to find out more about the man who sent her here.

And?

No joy. She has been too

pissed since to make any sense.

Look what one of your nibbles

has done.

You need to keep your fangs to

yourself Emily.

I felt like I was being

followed earlier.

Someone would have to be brave

to follow you.

I will check out with Kevin and Jenny later this morning.

And see if they have noticed

anything.

When she is sober enough take her home to annoy Roger.

That was a busy night shift.

That hospital gets busier by

the day.

Stop it Kevin! What's the

matter with you?

Well you know.

It's that time of the month when we...

you know, get up to things.

In your dreams!

Anyway I've got a busy day planned.

How busy?

Busy enough.

I've got an appointment with Father Matthews at four.

And then Sam's coming round.

What! God!

Isn't it a bit weird for you to go to church when being a vampire?

You just keep your spiciest

comments to yourself.

I'm a sentient being and I'll choose which ever spiritual pathway I like.

Well you said you were going to keep it

to just the odd reading now and again.

Well I can't go anymore. She

said not to come along again.

Got some sort of bad influence.

Something to do with being a vampire.

Bloody hell. What about

privacy!

Have you two both just used

your powers?

What if someone saw for God's

sake?

Actually your front door was

open.

Nice to see you too Jenny.

Like your pyjamas Kevin.

Such a turn-on.

Emily have you bitten anyone

recently?

That's why we've come here.

We're hungry. Do mind if we

have some liver?

How's the doctoring coming

along Kevin?

Been drinking anymore litres

of donated blood?

Aw that's a one off.

Well doesn't seem to be doing him much good anyway!

I hope you are not making any private references Emily.

And please stop stroking Kevin.

It will only make him bother

me more.

Sam says that you should watch some naughty movies together.

That might do you some good!

Sam! How could you!

Emily's only joking, aren't

you? Say you're sorry.

Look I know we ought to try and keep as low profile as possible.

And you think that living in

that rat-infested slum

won't be attracting any

attention?

Snob!

Cut to the chase. How is Diane?

Wayne's baby sitting her.

We're keeping her at the station at night.

And what about Jess?

Isn't she getting she getting like suspicious?

T thinks that Diane has issues.

Probably wants to discuss them on the show.

She has! She's been getting

drunk a lot! It's great!

I refuse to be provoked by you

Emily.

I mean what about this

detective?

Has Advent management been in

touch recently?

I don't know. Diane's not

making any sense.

And we all feel like we are

being followed.

It must be true. Have they

followed us here?

I guess.

Lets make plan B.

Pack whatever we can manage

into your car.

I'm not leaving.

It's alright for you lot with

your bohemian existence.

With what Wayne and Sam have got

it will easily fit into one car and you are all in the same place.

Yeah, Jenny's right.

We will buy one so we don't have to leave any of our stuff behind.

Yeah, I'll sort it out.

Are you sure?

Yeah. I know about cars.

Well It would make things

easier.

Do you need any money?

Yeah, give me five-hundred.

Plus I've got me bottle.

Aye, aye I see that.

Have you had some of that already today?

No, none of that man.

Hello. I'm looking for father

Matthews?

My name's Jenny. I rang

earlier.

Bless you my child you've come for your first confession.

Thank you Father. Can we get

started?

Oh it's good to see you are so

keen. Come on.

No time like the present.

My child you are in the

presence of God.

All sins and secrets are known.

Please begin your confession.

Please forgive me.

Because I have sinned. Well a bit.

Well in thought quite a lot

actually.

Oh I keep wanting to strangle

Emily.

Child it would be wrong to harm another of God's children.

But it is good that you can confess your sins so that you may be forgiven.

Don't worry about her. She's

not a person.

She's a little vampire who

likes to wind me up.

God wouldn't mind.

We are all equal in the eyes of

the Lord.

Besides this Emily will have

feelings of her own.

Ou would have a job hurting her.

She is a tough little bitch.

You must drive out all these dark

thoughts and rekindle love in your heart.

I've slapped her Father.

Oh it felt good at the time.

But then I felt bad. And Sam,

well he's my ex-husband.

Well he sides with her.

You are a tormented soul my

child.

Have you tried anger management?

I would.

But the thought of them getting

it while I go without.

Well it really winds me up.

But you are married my child.

I see you have a ring.

Oh Kevin?

He's another vampire.

In fact they all are.

I'm surrounded by them.

You seem rather preoccupied with these notions of the occult my child.

Have you spoken your GP about

these things?

We would all be sectioned if we

did that!

Father. There is something

else.

Do you mind if I ask you

something personal?

I'm not rejecting you.

It would be wrong in the eyes

of the Lord.

Rejection? I've had loads!

Even the medium's refused to

see me again.

Are you meant to be on

medication?

Have you got a psychiatric nurse with whom you can speak?

Please let me help you.

Will you come back?

Same time next week then?

See you later Emily.

Come in and sleep with me Sam.

Stop messing around.

I've told you before. I don't

want to hurt you.

It hurts that you don't want to show your feelings Sam.

I thought we had all this

behind us.

It was a mistake. A one-off.

I'm sorry Emily.

No it's now you are making the

mistake.

I don't care what people think.

It's not about what people

think.

It's because I care for you.

You know what I'm like.

So are you going to go in there alone and smash another bottle then?

At least that will keep you

off the booze.

Emily? Wake up.

That was nice.

I can't handle the feelings.

Please you are going to have to

leave.

No. Sam this is what you really

want.

I'm trying to get some control

back in my life.

You are mine.

Please you've got to let me go

Emily.

The pain is going to hurt us

both.

Does this really hurt!

Give in and stop fighting.

What training so they have in

counter surveillance?

I have never come across this

before.

I've never seen this before

anyway.

I would love to find out how

the hell they do it.

Not a word to anyone Sergeant

Handyside.

Sergeant Handyside we need more information.

We need more intel.

They've some method of avoiding

surveillance.

Give me the order sir.

Well I'm not reporting back that we know nothing more.

We would be a laughing stock at

the station sir.

Solutely.

I've got a warrant to enter the station and arrest X-Ray Two tonight.

Er when she is in the west wing doing

the administration and photocopying.

Can get an interrogation going.

- Exactly.

We have got to be a bit more

proactive on this.

X-Ray Two will not know what is

going to hit her.

Don't underestimate them

Sergeant.

Diane has gone dark in the last

few hours.

X-Ray Two may be daft but she

keeps on losing us.

Exactly. Yeah.

Emily Jasper?

My name is Mr Clarkson and this is Sergeant Handyside.

We've come to arrest you.

And I would like you to come

quietly.

What the hell are they doing

here?

I am sick of you lot taking me

for a fool!

Is there a problem Jess?

Oh no! Only Diane who passes

for a manager

and people tied up in the

control room!

No no problem at all!

Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!

Silver bullets!

You lot disgust me. I'm

reporting the lot of you!

Good morning this is Jess Edwards your early morning agony aunt.

Feel free to call in with your personal and private problems.

But first, lets talk about bad

language on television.

I'm sure we have all heard it

and I think we have all had

enough of it.

Bollocks!

I'm awfully sorry. Really I am.

Just call in about anything you

like!

She's just swore, she's not

happy with us.

Stuff her it's none of her

business.

What shall we do with these

blokes Sam?

Help me get them down to the

van. And bring Diane.

Plan B Emily.

Are you still alright getting

the car?

Yes of course I'm not stupid. I

know about cars.

There's a good place near here.

Daft cow out doing God only

knows what!

Comes home pissed again!

What the? Diane! Diane!

Diane!

Okay calm down.

Who the bloody hell are these

guys in here?

Don't know. Never seen them

before.

What do you mean you've never

seen them before?

They're in our bloody house!

It's far too early for me to be

up.

I don't believe you. Sorry guys.

How much?

I beg your pardon?

How much?

For what?

How much you want for it?

For what?

The car of course.

Oh it's not for sale.

Why not?

How much do you want to buy it

for?

Five hundred.

Come on kids in the car

quickly. In the car!

Do you want to buy this one

lady?

In the car!

Greedy Sods.

Do you want to buy this one?

I've got to talk to you Jenny.

What's the matter with you Sam?

I haven't seen you this bad for

ages!

Come on Sam what's the matter?

It's just, I can't...

I have feeling for her.

For Emily? I know.

No you don't. I care for her.

But I can't take the fucking

guilt!

The pain!

I can't take this anymore.

Perhaps I should just blow my

brains out.

A silver bullet from Diane's gun that should do the trick.

You're scaring me Sam I don't

understand!

I love her but I love you more!

Don't you get it!

Why didn't you say anything Sam!

I've married Kevin now!

You've kept all your feelings bottled up and look we've ended up?

I love you. I fucking love you

Jenny!

Hiya I think Sam's in there

because his car is there.

Yeah he is. Come in.

I think they're in the kitchen.

Emily's arrived.

Emily's arrived.

Stupid little bitch!

Shut up you stupid little bitch!

Look you don't even care about

anyone except Sam!

Oh fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck you!

Re such an annoying little slut!

- Shut up man you stupid cow!

You can go and deal with them.

It's your problem.

You know them better than me

anyway.

If you're not too pissed.

I've got to go.

I've got to get out of this house!

Your fault I hope you know this!

- I fucking hope you know this!

- Little slut!

- Slut?

- Slut! Slut!

- You're the slut in the office!

Cking kitchen with my boyfriend!

- Yeah my husband!

- You've got a fucking husband!

- Yes I've got a fucking husband.

You fucking greedy bitch!

Two men want em you stupid cow!

- Aargh fuck off!

I've go to sort this.

Please let her go Jenny.

Let her go Jenny.

Don't hurt her anymore. Please.

Please, stop, Jenny please!

No! No!

Stop Jenny please.

Let go of Jenny.

- We've got to sort this.

- No!

Please.

It's okay.

Sergeant Handyside, two things.

One I've caught up with Diane.

She's sorted.

And two the plan to put them under pressure has worked.

They're falling apart.

Now we will take them out one

at a time.