Danger! Danger! (2021) - full transcript

(mysterious music)

(letters whooshing)

(waves crashing)

(letters whooshing)

(dramatic music)

(Jonathan gasps)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)



(Jonathan grunts)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

(branch cracks)

(Jonathan exhales)

(branch cracking)
(Jonathan panting)

(branch breaks)
(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

Stay awake.

Okay.

(Jonathan panting)

(clasp clicks)
(ropes whirring)

(Jonathan groaning)



(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan sighs)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan sighs)

(Jonathan grunts)

(lighter clicking)

Oh, come on!

(Jonathan sighs)

(lighter thuds)

(suspenseful music)

(pistol clicking)

(Jonathan sighs)

(matches rattling)

(match strikes)

(Jonathan inhales)

(Jonathan sighs)
(engine rumbling)

(dramatic music)

(gas mask hisses)

(gas mask clatters)
(gas mask hissing)

Afternoon.

(Ella speaks in
foreign language)

Hope you don't mind me
making myself comfortable.

Are you an American?

Yes, ma'am.

(Hans speaks in
foreign language)

(Ella speaks in
foreign language)

What are you doing here?

(dirt rustling)

You German?

What are you doing here?

Crashed.

(Hans speaks in
foreign language)

(Ella speaks in
foreign language)

What is your name?

Jonathan.

Jonathan what?

Danger. My name is
Jonathan Danger, ma'am.

What division of the Third
Reich you soldiers from?

The Third Reich.

It's 1985, the
glory days are gone.

Berlin belongs to the Soviets.

We sadly now work
for Mother Russia.

Danger is a most
unusual name, is it not?

Is it your real name?

Sure.

What are you doing
all the way out here,

20 miles off the
coast of Africa?

You know, I didn't know
anybody knew about this place.

I paid a guy to fly over
and I parachuted in.

And how were you planning to get

off the island, Mr. Danger?

Oh, please, call
me Jonathan, ma'am.

And you can call me Miss Fritz.

Ella Fritz, if we get along.

How were you planning
to get off the island?

I've got an exit strategy.

Do you now?

I do.

So we have the how,

but what we don't have
is the what or the why.

So you'll have to
excuse my bluntness,

what are you doing
here and why?!

(gas mask hissing)

(Jonathan chuckles)

You know, I do like a girl
who's straight to the point.

Are you a spy?

Spy, no, no, no.
I'm a entrepreneur.

I will not ask again,
what are you doing here?!

That is a tough
question to answer

and even harder question
to answer quickly.

Can you toss me those matches?

(match strikes)

You have 30 seconds.

Go.

30 Seconds?

28 now.

My family's in the business
of finding the exotic

and selling it to the wealthy.

The exotic?

Yeah, the exotic.

You know, the bizarre,
the strange, the exotic.

You know, wealthy love
that sort of thing.

You just have to be willing
to go places they're not.

Find it, bring it back.

Sounds like you want to be
Indiana Smith when you grow up.

Jones.

It's Indiana...

Never mind.

(Ella exhales)

(thrilling music)

Oh, Jonathan,
how naughty of you.

Chances are, I'll get
at least one of you.

But only one of us.

Tell Hans to put his down
and I'll put mine down.

His is bigger than
yours, is it not?

(dramatic music)

It's not about the size.

Trust me, it is.

(gun fires)

(Hans shouts in
foreign language)

You shot him!

Oh, please, that's
just a scratch.

He'll be fine as long as
he doesn't go for it again.

I take it the keys
are in the jeep?

What?

Ze keys to ze jeep.

You can't have our jeep!

I wasn't asking permission.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,
wouldn't do that.

(engine rumbling)

(suspenseful music)

[Ella] Shoot it,
shoot it, shoot it!

(guns firing)

(tires squealing)

(guns firing)

(bullet ricochets)

(gun clicking)

(tires squealing)

(Hans sighs)

(Hans speaks in
foreign language)

I'm not.

(gun fires)

(body thuds)

(thrilling music)

(static crackling)

(engine sputtering)

(Jonathan panting)

Come on.

Stay awake.

(Jonathan exhales)

(gentle music)

[Violet] Daddy, I love you.

(fire roaring)
Daddy!

(Jonathan hyperventilating)

Come on.

So close.
(engine whirring)

(engine rumbling)

(button clicks)

(upbeat music)

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Come on over, baby ♪

♪ You're looking so good ♪

♪ She's hot ♪

♪ Let me tell you
what she's got ♪

(engine rumbling)

♪ Ooh, so hot ♪

♪ I think I'm gonna
blow my tire ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ So hey, little sugar, don't
stop pouring fuel on my fire ♪

♪ I'm on fire ♪

♪ Come on, now ♪

♪ Ooh, light my fire, baby ♪

♪ I've got a strong desire ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Uh, she's hot ♪

♪ Gonna make my cradle rock ♪

(punch thuds)

(Jonathan groaning)

♪ Think I'm gonna blow my tire ♪

♪ Come on, now ♪

American!

And I hate commies!

(gun thuds)
(horn honks)

(suspenseful music)

What's the matter,
Ivan? Vodka withdrawals?

(Jonathan grunting)

What?!

I said...

Hey. Are you having
vodka withdrawals?

Yeah, I heard
you the first time!

Well, then why'd you
say "what," you idiot?

Yeah 'cause it
didn't make any sense.

Oh, so you don't like vodka?

You think I'm Russian?

You speak pretty good English

for a KGB spy, you know that?

I'm not a KGB spy.

Oh, so you think I'm the
idiot? You think I'm the idiot?!

I'm not.

See that, that, is why you guys
are not gonna win this war.

And we are gonna kick
your Russian asses!

- What?
- Yeah, that's right,

the US of A, and
don't you forget it!

(kick thuds)
(Jonathan groaning)

(Jonathan coughing)

Oh, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

You hurt your head there?

You hit me with
the butt of your gun.

But that doesn't hurt
as bad as my ribs.

(Jonathan groans)

You actually didn't
hit me that hard.

I knocked your
ass out, didn't I?

(Jonathan chuckles)

Yeah, I can't give you
all the credit for that.

That mostly has to do
with the tree branch.

Oh, the tree branch.

Yeah, yeah, when I landed.

When you landed?

What, so there are
more Russians, then?

Is that what you're saying?

Oh, for the love of
God, man, I'm American!

I bet you love baseball
and hot dogs, don't you?

Yeah, yeah, I do, actually.

Oh, that's good.

That's good. Did they teach
you that in spy school?

What spy school?

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Loose lips sink ships, pal.

What are you talking about?

You and I are gonna sit here-

[Jade] I don't
think he's a Russian.

What happened to you?

I'm getting closer.

- Closer to what?
- Ah, ah, ah.

You don't talk to
her. All right?

Put the knife down.

He's obviously an American.

Yeah, well, then why
is he in a Russian jeep?

I don't know. Did you ask him?

I didn't need to.

Are you a Russian spy?

I'm not supposed to talk to you.

Oh, if you are,

I am gonna gut you and
eat you for dinner.

Bet you taste like goulash.

Forgive him. This
is my brother James.

He's a little overprotective.

Friends call me Jungle Jim.

Nice to meet you, Jungle Jim.

You ain't a friend. All right?

Well, some people call me
Jonathan. Jonathan Danger.

I'm an American.

I crashed in a Russian
camp about an hour ago.

What are you doing
out here, Jonathan?

Well, I stole
one of their jeeps.

Problem is I didn't get too far.

I may have a punctured lung

or some internal bleeding.

[Jade] What happened?

A tree branch
went through my rib

during my
not-so-awesome landing.

- Let's see.
- No, no, no, he's bluffing.

He's bluffing.

No, no, I said
don't. He's bluffing.

He's...

(Jonathan groaning)

Don't, don't,
don't, don't, don't.

(Jonathan panting)

Ouch, ouch!

(Jonathan groaning)

Don't, don't, don't, don't.

The blood's dry and
it's scabbed over.

It's stuck to my shirt.

I can't help you if I
can't see what's going on.

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

[Jonathan] Don't, don't,
don't, don't, don't.

(Jonathan panting)

Did you go through his stuff?

Don't go through my stuff!

All he had was this pack.

[Jade] What's this?

That's Mr. Bear.

Mr. Bear?

Yeah, that's Mr. Bear.

Can you just put it
back in my bag, please?

Why?

Because if you don't,
I'll have to kill you.

You'd have to kill me?

It was my daughter's.

So yeah, if you don't put it
back, yeah, I'll kill you.

You said was. Where's
your daughter now?

She's dead.

Go search his jeep.

Go.

Well, he's a
breath of fresh air.

What's your name?

Jade. Jade Calloway.

I don't believe it.

You really know where
it is, don't you?

This is a map of the island.

You really know where it is.

This is incredible.

Oh, what the hell
are you doing, woman?

It's not what it looks like.

It looks like you're
taking his shirt off.

Okay, then it is
what it looks like.

(engine rumbling)

Is there anyone
else in your group?

Shh.
(Jonathan mumbling)

(man speaks in foreign language)

(gas mask hissing)

(man speaks in foreign language)

(Jonathan mumbling)

How many more
people in your group?

Just me.

(Jim grunts)

All right, last
chance and be honest.

Are you or are you
not a Russian spy?

I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not!
- All right, well,

it was nice knowing you, buddy.

We can't just leave him.

Yeah, yeah, you
can't just leave me.

Why not?

Because he knows
where the temple is.

You see these lines all over
his body? That's the map.

He literally has it
tattooed across his skin.

We can finally find it
and get off this island.

Oh, no.

Yes, yes, we need him.

- I don't think so.
- We need him.

No.

(Jade whispering)

(Jim whispering)

Let's go.

Can't just...

Fine, have it your way.

(thrilling music)

(rope rasping)
(Jonathan grunts)

(Jim grunting)
(bags clattering)

Come on, let's go!

Hold my knife!

(guns firing)
(bullets ricocheting)

Don't move.

(gun firing)

What are you doing?

There's a revolver stuck
in the back of my pants,

but I can't reach it without
giving away our position.

Can you reach it?

You want me to reach around you?

[Jonathan] Yeah. Grab my gun.

- No.
- What?

No.

You wanna get
killed by Russians?

(Jade sighs)

I told you to grab my gun, not
feel my up while you do it.

I'm not trying to feel you up.

Got it?

(gas mask hissing)

Pull the trigger!

(gun fires)
Again!

(gun fires)

(Jonathan panting)

Woo! Yeah!

Sis!

That was so rad!

You think there's any
more Russians on the island?

Yup.

(gun snaps)

(Jonathan sighs)

(gentle music)

(Jonathan groaning)

[Jonathan] I gotta
stop for a second.

(Jim sighs)

(canteen rattles)

(Jonathan sighs)

(canteen clatters)
- Hey!

That's littering.

Sorry about your daughter.

It's okay, I'll
be seeing her soon.

[Jade] So you believe
it's really here?

I do.

And that it's not
really a temple?

It's my only way back to 1982.

This was hers.

Mr. Bear.

After the fire, it's the only
thing I have left of her.

Oh, god.

(tongue clicks)

Mr. Bear. Not a
very creative name.

When I gave it to her, she
asked me what his name was.

That's what I said.

[Jade] What was her name?

Violet.

Violet Monroe Fogg.

(fire roars)

Why wasn't her last name Danger?

You're not sticking to
your story, comrade.

(punch thuds)
Ow!

I'm making sure that
he's not lying to us.

That's gonna bruise.

So, what's the plan?

The plan is to follow your map.

Why'd you do it?
Why the tattoos?

(Jonathan sighs)

I travel light.

Figured this way, it'd be harder
for anyone to get the map.

(Jim chuckles)

I don't know about that.

Someone wanted that
map off of you,

they could probably get it.

Yeah, well, they'd
have to skin me.

That's what I was getting at.

Yeah, well, then
they'd have to kill me.

That is also what
I was getting at.

Well, then I'd have no need
for the temple, now would I?

I'd be dead.

How are you planning on getting

through all those soldiers?

I didn't know they were here.

Didn't know anybody was.

Locals on the mainland said
this island was uninhabited.

So you think we should team up.

What?!

Yeah.

See, you're clearly
in no condition

to take out a bunch
of Russian soldiers,

me and Jade are,
'cause we're bad asses.

You got that map on you.
I think we should team up.

Really? You were
just about to kill him.

No, he's obviously not KGB.

Thank you!

Sorry about, Jade.

She can be a little
suspicious sometimes.

You're kidding.

All right.

(Jonathan groans)

I'm ready to go.

Let's keep moving.

All right.

What?

(Jim chuckles)

Nothing.

What?

Oh, nothing. Nothing.

(Jonathan groans)
(body thuds)

[Jade] Are you okay?

(Jonathan groans)

Are you okay?

Yup! Just a little hard
to breathe, but I'm fine.

I'm ready to go.

You're in no shape to walk.

Good night's rest
will do you some good.

But my little girl,
she's waiting for me.

If she's in 1982, she's fine.

She doesn't even know.

I guess you're right.

I mean, it is
getting late, anyway.

Should we start a fire?

Nah, the Russians will see it.

But but we can make s'mores.

Come on, let's find a
place and hunker down.

(Jonathan groans)

(gentle music)

(liquid squirting)

(body squishing)

(helicopter whirring)

Pardon me. Delano.

Delano, I don't
have time for this.

Do you know what this is?

I'm sure you're
going to tell me.

It's cancer.

Throat cancer to be exact,
caused by radiation,

which means we're getting close.

Wherever that temple is,
it's here, on this island,

and it's leaking energy.

Leaking a tremendous
amount of energy.

Most likely, it's
highly unstable.

Wasn't he fine just a week ago?

Yeah.

He's dead now.

This radiation
spreads more rapidly

than anything I've
ever encountered.

You need to find that temple
and you need to find it fast.

What do you think
I've been doing?

A third American has arrived.

Washington must know
it's here as well.

So all the more reason for
you to hurry up and find it.

Three Americans.
Isn't that strange?

Are you questioning my loyalty?

Because I wouldn't do
that, if I was you.

German.

You're quite the war hero.

The great Delano Davis,
working for the Russians.

That thing ain't gonna save you.

Most likely, we're
already infected.

Go find my Geiger counter.

Yes, sir!

Damn, Nazi.

(Jim grunts)
(Jonathan groans)

[Jonathan] Easy.

(Jonathan groans)

What about over there?

Yeah.
(Jonathan groans)

All right, I got it.

(Jonathan sighs)
(Jim sighs)

(all panting)

So I told you my story.

Why are the two of you
trying to reach the temple?

No reason.

No reason?

(Jonathan chuckles)

You're kidding me, right?

You had to travel around the
world to an uncharted island,

20 miles off the
coast of Africa,

to live in that ratty
tent I found you in.

Nobody does that for no reason.

(Jim sighs)

Don't.

Don't.

You see that new movie,
"Back to the Future,"

just came out?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, you know the DeLorean,

the new car where doors go
(mimics car doors hissing)?

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

I said I saw the movie.
- Thank you.

Well, instead of
going back in time

and trying to bang his mom,

Marty McFly should've
played the lotto.

I got every single
lotto written down here

from the last five years.

Me and Jade are
gonna go get rich.

(hand taps)

Can I see those?
(hand slaps)

Hell no, you can't see them!

(Jonathan sighs)

All right.

So tomorrow, bright and
early, we head for the temple?

Absolutely.

Well, I'm taking it down.

(Jim grunting)

(Jim groans)

There's a rock there.

It's really
comfortable, actually.

(Jim grunts)

Hold on.

Hold on.

Yeah, hold on a second.

(Jim groans)

There's a slant.

You good?

Yeah, I'm good, it's a little
noisy, with you jabbering.

(Jim groans)

Maybe we should give him

some space.
- Yeah.

Come on.
(Jonathan groans)

You two should get some sleep.

Gonna be a bit of
a hike tomorrow.

(majestic music)

(crickets chirping)

(Jonathan chuckles)

Your brother is
quite the character.

Yeah.

He's right, though.

It's gonna be a bit of a
hike if your map's right.

It is.

Tell you what, this should
help us get some good sleep.

(cork pops)

You've been holding out on me.

Yup.

(Jade sighs)

I'm impressed.

Yeah, growing up,
my parents were both

basically functioning
alcoholics.

Grew up with the stuff.

Rum with the Cheerios, huh?

Breakfast of champions.

Me too.

Your turn.

Mm. Okay.

That's not how we play.
You're not supposed to match me.

You're supposed to
drink more than me.

(Jonathan sighs)

(Jonathan sighs)

That's four. Now,
you got to do five.

There's not even
five gulps in here.

I could finish it.

Do it.

So, what are the two of
you really doing out here?

What do you mean?

Please, not that the lotto
idea is not a good one,

but that's not why
you're really here.

How do you know?

I can tell.

You don't come all the way out
here on a wing and a prayer,

searching for a temple

that locals myths says
can take you back in time,

not unless you've
lost everything.

And you've lost everything?

Yeah.

Oh, I am starting to
feel that alcohol.

Slow it down there, tiger.

(Jonathan sighs)

(Jonathan groans)

I'm sorry.

I think I've just
lost a lot of blood,

and I may or may not
have a punctured lung.

I haven't eaten in
the last two days,

and the alcohol has gotten
me just a little woozy.

Ouch.

What?

I just said slow it down.

Now, you're acting
like the reason

you just hit on me is because
you think you're dying.

I just meant maybe
after another bottle.

What, you have another bottle?

Maybe.

Maybe like yes or maybe like-

Maybe like yes.

But be warned, if you
try to hit on me again,

my brother might kill you.

We're out of rum, but have
a little bit of whiskey.

- Whiskey, oh, now we're-
- Shh, it's Jim's.

Don't wanna wake him up.

You know, I realized you just
totally avoided my question.

What was the question again?

What are the two of
you really doing here?

Ooh, back story.

Come on. I told
you about Mr. Bear.

Okay, fine.

I know what's in the
temple. I know what it is.

You do?

It's not from here.

You mean, like, from Earth?

No, not like that.

Here.

(thrilling music)

It's a file on the temple.

Where'd you get this?

[Jade] I stole it.

You stole it?

From where?

[Jade] My dad.

[Jonathan] Wait.

Your dad has a top secret
file on the government?

Shh.

I don't want Jungle
Jim over there to know.

[Jonathan] Why not?

'Cause our father
was court-martialed

after it went missing.

Locked him up,
threw away the key.

Wait, you got
your dad locked up,

and you had this
the entire time?

Well, it's not like he was
the nicest guy in the world

or won Dad of the Year
contests or anything like that.

Actually think it'll do him
some good to have some me time.

But if this thing is real
and we do go back in time,

he won't have ever
served any jail time,

so no harm, no foul, right?

I guess so.

Trust me, my logic is sound.

[Jonathan] Is it?

Mm-hm.

What's that?

(Jade speaks in
foreign language)

What's that mean?

It means "Here be lions."

Why do you have that
tattooed on your wrist?

It was on the map.

I got a bit drunk

and I had the guy copy
it all down, so he did.

Did you do all
of those yourself?

Yeah, I did.

They're not that bad, right?
(Jade chuckles)

Yeah.

(Jade chuckles)

Bottoms up.

(mysterious music)

(footsteps treading)

[Jim] Ahem.

(Jade sighs)

What?

You fornicate with
the Russian spy?

Stop.

Did you fornicate
with the Russian spy?

(Jade sighs)

No.

'Cause that's the
oldest trick in the book.

[Jade] What is?

It's called the
honey trap, all right?

They seduce you.

They get all your
secrets out of you

when you're at your
most vulnerable.

Don't be gross.

Not gonna have sex with
you sleeping right there.

I'm just saying, you
don't see me banging

any Russian spies, do you?
(engine rumbling)

Shit.

What is it?

[Jim] Come on, we gotta go!

(gun firing)

- What's he doing?!
- We gotta go.

(gun firing)

(man speaks in foreign language)

(gun firing)

(man speaks in foreign language)

(gun firing)

[Man] Go, go, go!

(man speaks in foreign language)

[Jade] What did he say?

I think he wants us
to put our hands up.

(man speaks in foreign language)

So you do speak Russian.
Oh, my god, Jim was right.

(man speaks in foreign language)

Honestly, I'm just guessing.

(gas masks hissing)

(dramatic music)

(helicopter whirring)

We meet again.

I'm not sure about you,

but I'm extremely pleased
by these circumstances.

Wait outside.

No one comes in,
no one comes out,

unless it's myself or Delano.

[Man] Affirmative.

Who is your lovely
new girlfriend?

I thought he had something
very special, you and me.

You swoop into a girl's life,

and just as quickly, swoop out.

You left me so distraught,
in such a mood,

that I killed my
young assistant Hans.

You see, I was so heartbroken.

And now you simply show up
again with another woman!

And you.

We've been keeping tabs on you

to make sure you didn't find
the temple before we did it.

But as you can see, we found
it quite fine on our own.

We didn't even need
Mr. Danger to help us.

It is Mr. Danger, is it not?

(Jonathan mumbling)

I'm sorry, darling,

I can't understand you with
that gag in your mouth.

(Jonathan spits)

I said, what are you doing here?

Me or the Soviets?

The Soviets. But
you're not KGB.

No, we are part of the
Soviet Space Program.

(Jonathan chuckles)

You want me to believe you're
all a bunch of cosmonauts?

I think Winston
Churchill best described us

as a riddle wrapped in a
mystery inside an enigma,

which to my ears, sounds
rather sexy, don't you agree?

So what are you looking for?

Don't take me for stupid!

We're looking for the same
thing that you are looking for.

The same thing I assume you're
looking for as well, my dear.

I honestly don't see
what you see in her.

But you, Mr. Danger, with
all of the tattoos...

(Jonathan grunts)

No need to flex
those muscles for me.

(Ella growls)

It looks like playtime is over.

Delano is our main doctor
here on the island.

I take it he's
gonna question us?

Yes, that's right.

Hello.

I assume you know
where the temple is.

You're American?

Yes, I am.

And why do you think I
know where the temple is?

'Cause of the
tattoo on your skin.

So if you're American,

then why are you
working for the Soviets?

After the end of
the Second World War,

the United States
started recruiting Nazis

for their science division.

The same Nazis
that I lost my leg,

and a bunch of my close
friends, fighting,

and not just fighting,

killing.

There's a big difference.

We were sent over there to kill.

When you're sent off to
kill, people get shot,

people get blown up,

people get changed.

(Delano chuckles)

(Delano groans)

It's made of titanium.

Same thing a space
shuttle's made of.

What happened?

World War II.

I was only 16.

I was too young.

But I told them I was 18,
ready and willing to fight.

And they loved
the sound of that,

so they signed me up
and shipped me out

just as quickly as they could.

You have any idea of
what a medical tent,

on the front lines, over
in Berlin, looks like?

I carried my commanding
officer on my shoulders

three and a half miles to
the nearest medical tent

with two bullets in me
from a goddamn Nazi.

You know what they told
me when I got there?

(Delano chuckles)

I put my commanding
officer down on a cot.

They took one look at my
leg, all shot to hell,

and they said, "We're
gonna have to amputate,"

and took out the bone saws.

No painkillers, no gauze,

just the bone saws
and a bloody mess.

That leg twitched for
nearly two minutes

when they took it off.

You're lying.

After the war, I went home.

Both of my brothers were dead,

my girl married my best friend,

and I was missing a leg.

(Delano chuckles)

Your government, you
know what they did?

They put those
goddamn Nazis to work.

Can you believe that shit?

So, you went to go
work for the Russians?

I'll admit I was a easy recruit.

I mean, they paid
for all my schooling,

they put me in the Experimental
Design Bureau, and...

Where are my manners?

I've been talking like
this is all about me.

It's actually all about you.

Let's get started.

Ella, would you be so kind
as to set us some mood music?

You know what I love
most about Americans?

American music, rock and roll.

Would you like to listen
to a record with us?

You know, they're not
called a records anymore?

They're called tapes now.

(button clicks)

(upbeat music)

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

♪ Come on over, baby ♪

♪ You're looking so good ♪

I like it.

♪ Let me tell you
what she's got ♪

Now, tell us what I
know about the temple.

Nein.

Who told you it was here?

Nein.

I tried. You may begin.

♪ Come on, now ♪

One of the things
I learned very early

in the USSR is to be efficient.

(hand thuds)

They pride themselves
on that shit.

Hey, careful there, Doc.

What is the American saying?

"This little piggy
went to the market."

Tell me what you know
about the temple.

I don't know anything.

(knife rasps)
(Jonathan groans)

(Jade groans)

(Jonathan hyperventilating)

(Jonathan groaning)

You're gonna need some
gauze for that, stat.

(Jonathan groaning)

(button clicks)

I won't ask again.

Who told you it was
here?! Who else knows?!

You know, I'm
gonna need a second.

I'm a little
lightheaded after that.

We have plenty of time.

Delano specializes in
vivisection. That's Latin.

Judging from some
of your tattoos,

you have an interest in Latin.

Vivi comes from the Latin
word vivus, which means alive.

And section comes from the
Latin word section or cutting.

(Jonathan chuckles)

That's fantastic.

You know, it is really good
for a guy to have a hobby.

(Jonathan hyperventilating)

"This little
piggy stayed home."

(knife rasps)
(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan hyperventilating)

(Jonathan laughs)

You know, that hurts. I'll
admit it, that hurts a lot.

Do we really need to discuss

the little piggy that
had a roast beef?

The CIA knows.

And what was your exit strategy?

Can't tell you, otherwise
I'd have to kill you.

You know, you're not going
to make it out of this alive.

You know that, don't you?

(Jade panting)

Yeah, I get that.

But I figure you won't kill
me because you need the code.

What code?

To turn it on.

You can't just walk in
there after all these years

and expect it to work.

You need to know
how to turn it on.

You give me what I
want, it's all yours.

So what do you want?

And please, choose your next
sentence very carefully.

I wanna go back to 1982.

You give me that,
it's all yours.

And why wouldn't
be just torture you

until you give us the code?

You just chopped
off two of my fingers,

and I'm still
willing to negotiate.

And what if your
code doesn't work?

Then you can let Delano play
doctor on us all he wants.

Mm-mm! Mm-mm.

Mm-mm, mm-mm.

I think we could
cut another finger.

You've never wanted
something as badly

as I want this, not even close.

(gentle music)

(fire roaring)

(suspenseful music)

You have yourself
a deal, Mr. Danger,

but you make one wrong move,
and I won't just kill you,

I'll also kill your girlfriend.

Make no mistake about
that. I will not hesitate.

Deal.

And I won't just kill you,

I'll Delano play
with you some more.

I figured. I mean, I figured.

(engine rumbling)

(gas masks hissing)

(dramatic music)

Well, we're here.

(door whirring)
(gears clacking)

(Jonathan grunts)

(Jonathan sighs)

(gas masks hissing)

It's real.

It's really here.

Feel like we're
stepping onto the set

of "Alien" right now.

What is this place?

It's a ship, an expedition
that went backwards in time,

not from our time, the future.

Very Marty McFly.

How'd it get in the
mountain like this?

The team didn't account for
the rotation of the Earth,

or their math is off.

Whatever it was, they wound
up inside of a mountain.

How long you think
it's been here?

Probably hundreds of years.

The locals that used to
live here, the natives,

they worshiped
this for centuries.

Their myths, their legends,

all arising out of
this holy mountain.

Imagine what it must've
been like for them.

One day, a flash appears,
cutting through the cliffs,

avalanches and earthquakes,

and then when you signed up

your bravest soldiers
to investigate,

they find something
so unimaginable

that only a
supernatural explanation

could possibly make
sense of it all.

And then there
was the screaming.

The screaming?

They say they used
to hear screaming

from inside the mountain.

And so what do
you think happened

to all the natives, then?

Radiation probably
wiped them all out.

This thing is leaking.

We've been here for months,
and in the past few days,

several of our men
have gotten very sick.

Rapid-onset cancer's
wiping everybody out.

So why are you here?

We all know the Soviet
Union is going to fail.

The economy can't keep up,
Regan is playing dirty.

Our mission is to go back in
time and stop it from failing.

That doesn't answer
why you are here, Ella.

You're not Russian.

You're too smart
for your own good.

I'm here to go back in time

and make sure the Soviets
lose World War II,

that they never take Berlin,
never split my city in half,

never drop the Iron Curtain.

Wait. That's not the mission.

Sounds good to me.

Would you try to stop me?

I just wanna get back to 1982.

I'll stop you.

Turn it on, now!

(Jonathan blows)

Hey, do you guys really
think this is from 1999?

Just do it! Enter the code.

All right.

(dial clicking)
(buttons clicking)

(buttons clicking)

(dial clicking)

(buttons clicking)

Are you playing?

No.

Just a little
lightheaded is all.

(buttons clicking)

(machine humming)

(air hisses)

(machine whirring)

(machine rattling)

(machine humming)

(alarm blaring)

(air hisses)

Sounds like we're
about to take off.

- Lead the way.
- Ella.

You can't be serious.

(man speaks in foreign language)

(doors creaking)

(flashlight clicks)

(suspenseful music)

(static buzzing)

(machine whirring)
(static crackling)

(static crackling)
(radio chattering)

What is it?

[Jonathan] Shh.

What is it?

Be quiet!

[Ella] What is it?

[Jonathan] Shh.

If you're stalling, I'm
going to kill the girl first.

(Jim shouts in foreign language)

Bitch!
(gun fires)

Danger Jim is here
to save the day!

(gun firing)
(men groaning)

Ah, shit.

Woo!
(gun fires)

Who's left?!

Woo! Danger Jim!

Yes!

You guys all right?
- Go, go!

[Jim] I'm going.

[Jonathan] Come on!

(Delano coughing)

This is what I get
for following a Nazi!

God!

I'll be okay. I'll be okay.

(sparks crackling)

(alarm blaring)

What are you doing here?

Saving your lives?

Did you call yourself
Danger Jim back there?

Oh, yeah. You like that?

It's my new name.

No, no, no, no, you can't
have it. Danger's my name.

Oh, okay, like that
was a real name. Okay?

Don't worry, you can
be Jungle Johnny.

[Jonathan] I don't
wanna be Jungle Johnny.

- I'm Danger now.
- No.

- Yes.
- I'm Danger.

- I'm Danger.
- I'm Danger.

There's nothing
dangerous about you.

We don't have time for this!

(gun fires)

I missed one.

(Jim groaning)

(punches thudding)
(Jim groaning)

(Jim grunts)

(man groans)

(punches thudding)
(man groaning)

(Jim groaning)

(man screaming)

Shoot!
- Stop moving!

(man screams)

Come on, hold still!

(man screaming)

Shoot!

(gun fires)

(Jim groans)

You missed two.

(gentle music)

(door whirring)
(gears clacking)

(air hisses)
(alarm blaring)

(flashlight clicks)

(suspenseful music)

(machine buzzing)

(lights buzzing)

(gears clanking)

That does not sound good.

(gears clanking)

Are you hearing that?

(gentle music)

[Violet] Daddy, I love you.

(fire roaring)

Daddy!

[Ella] Jonathan.

(dramatic music)

[Jonathan] Ella.

[Ella] We really must
stop meeting like this.

Is this our time capsule?

It is.

[Ella] And is this
our hide and shootout?

Looks like it.

(suspenseful music)

(gun fires)

(Ella groans)

I should've had Delano start
with the trigger fingers.

I guess so.

It's been a
pleasure, Mr. Danger.

The adventure is just beginning.

[Jade] 1982, right?

1982.

(door hisses)

(door creaks)

(lever clicking)

(button clicks)
(machine humming)

(dial clicking)

(door whirs)

What are you doing?

Coming with you.

Jade.

Mm.

(door whirs)

Sorry I'm late.

Yeah.

(Jonathan sighs)

What are you doing?

Mega Millions, here
we come. Holy shit!

What happened to your fingers?

Jim, where have you been?!

- Where have I been?
- Yeah.

Oh, I've just been killing
Russians, saving your life.

I don't know, getting my
ass kicked by that guy.

Did you see that?
(machine buzzing)

(energy whooshes)

(gentle music)

(gears clanking)

(air hisses)

(Ella panting)

(lever clicking)

(button clicks)
(machine humming)

(dial clicking)

(dial clicking)

(door whirs)

(gears clanking)
(machine buzzing)

(adventurous music)

(Jim groaning)

(door whirring)

(tape screeching)

(Jonathan gasps)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

(Jonathan groans)

(Jonathan panting)

(static crackles)

(upbeat music)

♪ Ooh, yeah ♪

♪ Come on over, baby ♪

♪ You're looking so good ♪

♪ She's hot ♪

♪ Let me tell you
what she's got ♪

♪ Ooh, so hot ♪

♪ I think I'm gonna
blow my tire ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ So hey, little sugar, don't
stop pouring fuel on my fire ♪

♪ I'm on fire ♪

♪ Come on, now ♪

♪ Ooh, light my fire, baby ♪

♪ I've got a strong desire ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Uh, she's hot ♪

♪ Gonna make my cradle rock ♪

♪ Ooh, so hot ♪

♪ Think I'm gonna blow my tire ♪

♪ Come on, now ♪

♪ Put your hands together ♪

♪ Ooh, baby, yeah ♪

♪ She's hot ♪

♪ Gonna make my cradle rock ♪

♪ Ooh, she's hot ♪

♪ So hot ♪

(thrilling music)

(mysterious music)

(adventurous music)

(thrilling music)

(dramatic music)

(thrilling music)