Cut and Chop (2020) - full transcript
A troubled method actor gets carried away with his work on a role, playing a butcher.
(BRIGHT HARPSICHORD MUSIC)
("WALTZ IN C SHARP MINOR")
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
What do you want tonight?
You know what I want, baby.
Pork chops again?
Mm.
Maybe.
Excuse me?
Could we get three
beef flaps, please?
Thanks.
Can I help you?
Shh.
Can I get a pound
of ground beef?
Sure.
Anything else?
Not today.
You enjoy this?
Excuse me, friend?
Your work here.
Yes, sir, yes.
I thought so.
("UNA FURTIVA LAGRIMA")
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
That was too much, Tom.
I thought you might
like it, you know?
What is wrong with you?
(SOBS)
(MOODY HARP MUSIC)
Well, just the two of us.
It's cold in here.
You know what it is?
I'm worried.
Well, just the two of us.
Cold in here.
Please, take your time...
Don't ask me to
run lines with you.
What is that smell?
What?
That smell, it's rotten.
Gross!
Go put it in the garbage
chute in the hall!
What are you doing?
Are you stealing all this?
Answer me!
Yeah.
I won't get caught.
What?
I don't understand, why
are you taking these items?
It's a surprise.
(MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Two of us.
(ESMERELDA SIGHS)
Well, just the two of us.
Cold in here.
Don't forget we have dinner
with Gladys and Burt tomorrow.
(TOM SOFTLY GRUNTS)
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(BELLS RING)
(BLUES MUSIC)
- Hot day today.
- Oh, yeah.
It's gonna get hotter.
That'll be two dollars.
(REGISTER BLEEPS)
(REGISTER DINGS)
Hey, can I see that there?
- You mean this one?
- Oh, yeah, that one.
CLERK: Certainly.
Oh-ho-ho.
How much?
Now, cowboy, most people, $70.
For you?
$60.
Thief.
(CLERK CHUCKLES)
Thief?
Come on.
Okay, look.
$60 to take it.
I want it but not today.
All right, all right,
all right, final offer.
$55.
Not today.
(CAN HISSES)
(GULPS)
(BELCHES)
And that's a no.
("AEOLIAN HARP")
Hey, pretty lady.
We're still on for dinner
with the boys tonight?
Of course.
I need to see Tom
be more social.
Did you just get in?
Yeah!
Me and Burt went to
Piano Bar last night.
Let's just say momma
had one too many.
I was thinking for tonight if
you two wanna come over early,
we could have a
little smoke session.
Need to cut back
on the cocktails
so these laugh lines
don't get any deeper.
Yeah, sounds great.
Tom doesn't really get high,
though, it makes him act weird,
but I'm sure he'll
bring his flask.
Well, I'm positive him and
Burt will get along, then.
(ESMERELDA SIGHS)
You look under the weather.
Gettin' enough rest?
Not last night.
Tom is driving me crazy.
GLADYS: Talk to me, honey.
He's at it again.
- Ass to mouth?
- No!
Must have him confused
with Gina's beau, Walter.
What, then?
He's biting me, like,
every other time he gets off.
Hm.
Well?
Do you enjoy it?
Kind of.
But not when he takes
chunks out of me.
That's the punishment we
deserve by dating younger men.
Little creeps. (LAUGHS)
I'm joking.
No, this is serious,
he shouldn't bite you.
You have to put an end
to that shit, honey.
But honestly, it
sounds kind of steamy.
I've never really been bit.
No, this is serious.
Okay, I wanna show
you, come here.
(GASPS) Oh, my god!
This is serious!
- I know.
- You have to end it.
No!
No, he just moved in.
I know, but it'll
get dirtier, trust me.
I was dating a guy a few
years ago named Tony,
who started choking me
every time he got off,
but after a month, the poor
little man couldn't cum,
unless I was on the verge of
passing out from suffocation!
I told him to back off, right?
I think he thought I was using
reverse psychology on him,
and that I was really wanting
a tighter grip on my neck.
So I blacked out, woke
up a few minutes later,
saw Tony at the foot of my bed,
eating rocky road ice cream.
(TONY LAUGHS)
Selfish prick.
I told him to get the fuck
out and never come back.
I'm telling you,
it could get nasty.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Strange.
This one's strange.
Yeah, I know.
I think he's a
kleptomaniac, too.
Please don't tell
anyone, not even Burt.
What?
That's...
Well, I guess I'll keep my
belongings close to me tonight.
No, no, he
doesn't steal things
from people that
he actually knows.
He just takes odd, invaluable
objects from random places
like gadgets from gas stations,
and cheap food from
grocery stores,
knives from pawn shops.
He is a strange little man.
What've you gotten yourself
into with this one?
I don't know.
But it's the complex
ones that hook us, right?
(GLADYS SIGHS)
(DOOR CREAKS)
Tom?
Tom Cain?
Come in.
Break a limb.
(DOOR CREAKS)
(HEELS CLACK)
Hello, Tom.
I'm Ron, the director.
To my left is the
casting director, Lisa,
and to my right is
the producer, Roberto.
So you will be reading
with Lisa today.
She'll have you slate
your name and height,
and you can begin
whenever you're ready.
There's also a
chair to your right,
if you'd like to use
that for your audition.
Okay.
Any questions before you begin?
Are you afraid?
You should be.
My name's Tom Cain and
I'm five-foot-nine.
("SCOOBIDOO LOVE")
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
(LISA CHOKES)
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(TRAFFIC HUMS)
(BIRDS TWEET)
(DOOR CREAKS)
Tom Cain?
Come in.
(DOOR CREAKS)
Well, it's good to
see you again, Tom.
We've been waiting for you.
Take a seat, if you like.
I'll stand.
Well, we decided to call you
in today, not for a callback,
but to offer you the role.
We're holding callbacks for
some other roles this afternoon,
but decided to go ahead and
offer you the role in person,
considering that you
don't have representation.
Your audition last
week blew us away.
We showed your audition
tape to the rest of the team
and without a
doubt, we all agree,
you are the one for the role.
Well, what do ya say, Tom?
Have we found our
antagonist in Cut and Chop?
(KNOCKS)
Hey!
- Good to see you again!
- You too.
BURT: You must be Tom.
We give hugs.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hey, pretty lady!
- Hi!
- Thanks for coming.
- Of course.
- Hi, Tom.
- Hello.
Nice to see you again.
Burt, I can't believe
you and Tom have never met.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, well, I know.
It seems like it probably
should've happened already.
You and Gladys have been
working together for what,
half a year now?
Almost eight months?
We've been trying to get the
four of us together ever since.
And that's the way
the cookie crumbles.
Yeah, well, crumbling
cookies and all,
it's time we all made
up for some lost time.
So, make yourselves
at home, have a seat.
Tom, can I get you a drink?
TOM: Sure.
Now, I had some beer, but
I drank it all last night.
But, I can offer you
some fine whiskey.
Oh, I brought some, too.
Oh, yeah?
My kinda man.
How about you take
a shot out of mine,
and then I take a shot out
of whatever you pour me?
You know what?
I like the way you think.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
I got myself this
vintage whiskey here
when I sold my first
screenplay recently.
- Oh, you're a writer?
- Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
I sold a script for
some laughable amount
to this little indie
production company,
but I was real happy
with the process,
so I treated myself
to that whiskey.
Congrats, are they gonna
keep you on for rewrites?
Oh, no, they got these
young Hollywood hustlers
saying they're gonna
come in, tear it apart,
put it back together again.
Basically, Tom, they
just bought my idea,
and they want me out
of it. (CHUCKLES)
But hell, I don't care.
I mean, I'm happy, it's the
first thing I ever sold.
Hey.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
(GLASSES CLINK)
(BURT COUGHS)
- Oh, my god. (COUGHS)
- Mm, mm-mm-mm.
- Damn!
- That's tasty.
Oh, my god.
What the hell was that?
Oh, that's an out-of-work
actor's pour. (CHUCKLES)
Well, it looks like Burt
and Tom are gettin' along.
Yeah, that's odd.
Tom does not warm up
to people quickly.
(CHUCKLES) Well, Burt
has a way about him.
And it looks like
they're both warming up
quickly with that whiskey.
As long as Tom doesn't
get carried away
and take a bite out
of my little Burt.
I'm just happy
to see him smiling.
Hey, ladies?
Care for a little drink?
I told you, baby, I'm gonna
lay off the sauce tonight.
You want one?
Yeah, maybe I'll have something
simple like a vodka tonic?
Make vodka tonic
for our guest, dear.
Comin' up!
All right.
Oh, you could make
another one of those,
I'll drink it
before we head out.
Sure thing, pal.
(ICE CUBES CLINK)
Splash of vodka.
Now for the best part.
No, no, no, I'm okay.
Oh, all right.
- Shall we?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Oh, that tastes good.
- Here you go.
- Thanks.
- Here you go, baby.
- Oh, okay, yeah.
Thank you, sweetie.
Well, yeah, we were
just gonna go out
and hit the grocery and get
a little six pack, but uh,
Tom, you wanna smoke?
Why not?
You're gonna smoke, baby?
Don't worry.
Hey, are you sure?
It didn't hit you in a
good place last time.
I wasn't happy
then, I'm happy now.
Happy for my new friend.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Nice, pal.
(TOM EXHALES)
Let's get nasty.
(RAIN SPLASHES)
So, you're an actor, huh?
You working on any
projects at the moment?
Perhaps I am right now.
TOM: Yeah, I booked a
role for an indie film today.
Really?
We'll have to go
celebrate, congratulations.
Yeah, what kind of role was it?
Oh, I'd rather not go into it.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Now, that's a first.
I think you're the only
actor I've ever met
that didn't wanna
talk about himself,
or the role he was playing.
(TOM CHUCKLES)
Well, I haven't
told Esmerelda yet.
Oh.
Okay.
Probably for a good reason.
I can respect that.
Yeah.
Well, shall we?
("THE BLUE DANUBE")
Repetition,
repetition, repetition.
Huh, I knew it.
Meisner.
What?
Yeah, you studied
the Meisner technique.
Serious method acting.
Meisner.
Yeah.
Hold on.
(CHUCKLES)
Yeah, yeah, hey, sweetie.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, we're at the grocery.
Mm-hm.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, let me ask.
Tom?
The girls are ordering
Pho, you want any...
Beef, tendon and tripe.
Yeah, beef, tendon and tripe.
Got it. (CHUCKLES)
Okay, see you soon, sweetie.
Okay, bye.
All right.
Hola, amigo.
No more chopping today.
You like to watch
more than buy, huh?
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
BUTCHER: You look
like you want my job.
(DISTORTED VOICE) -
You do want my job!
Hey, you've got the wrong guy.
Amigo, I see you every day.
(CHUCKLES)
(SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
("NOCTURNE IN B FLAT MINOR")
God bless this food,
God bless our bodies.
In Christ's name, we pray.
Amen.
Yeah.
(ESMERELDA CHUCKLES)
BURT: This all
looks so tantalizing.
(TOM SIGHS)
Do you have any hot sauce?
- Hot sauce?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- There you go.
- Oh, my favorite.
Yeah, you can't put enough
of that stuff on there.
I tell you what. (CHUCKLES)
Mm!
Oh, this is good.
Yeah.
Tom, get after those wings.
(FOOD CRUNCHES AND SQUELCHES)
So you guys are
leaving tomorrow, right?
Yeah.
We'll be on Balboa Island
for the rest of the weekend.
My aunt has a place there.
She coaxed us to stay while
she's gonna be in Berlin.
Oh, that sounds fun.
Right?
You should come out
there at some point.
My Uncle Bob could take
us out on the yacht.
ESMERELDA: Oh!
BURT: I'm fearful of Bob.
He has a yacht and a
better mustache than me.
(GROUP CHUCKLES)
Seriously, sweetie, didn't you
say he used to own one of the
largest real estate investment
companies in all Los Angeles?
Mm-hm, at one point.
I think he sold it to Warren
Buffet in the early '90s.
And now he spends his
entire retirement trying
to lure young bikini-clad
women onto his yacht.
I mean, it's a dirty job
but someone has to do it.
Oh, one day, sugar loaf.
One day that'll
be papa. (LAUGHS)
(TOM MOANS)
ESMERELDA: So Burt, Gladys
tells me that you're a writer.
Mm, yeah.
ESMERELDA: What kind
of stuff are you writin'?
Oh, screenplays mainly, yeah.
I was telling Tom
about one earlier.
A little horror film
I've been working on.
Has more of an
ominous feel to it.
And I've got another one
that I've been working on.
It's more loosely based
on my adolescence.
So that one's (CHUCKLES) more
of a pornographic nature.
(LAUGHS)
(TOM MOANS)
(LAUGHS)
(COUGHS)
Hey, you got some more
of that whiskey back there?
- Oh, boy.
- Tom.
Hey, Tom.
I think you've had
enough to drink tonight.
It's okay.
I've got the actor's pour.
Look, look here, buddy.
Why don't you just grab
the couch over there?
I know how this Pho can
get to a man. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah, come on.
I don't know.
Had a little too
much, that's all.
He's gonna be okay, right, yeah?
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry, guys.
Oh, no, it's okay.
That's what a couch is for,
get a little rest. (LAUGHS)
Hey, put a little more hot
sauce on that. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
GLADYS: Yeah, party down.
(WOMEN LAUGH)
Send that over here
to momma. (CHUCKLES)
- Daddy want?
- Daddy wants.
- Spice it up, daddy.
- Daddy always wants.
(GROUP CHUCKLES)
GLADYS: Yeah, it's so true.
(WOMEN CHUCKLE)
(JAUNTY ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(HEELS CLACK)
(HEELS CLACK)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Tom is missing.
GLADYS: Really?
Oh, well, he must've slid
past us without us realizing it.
Probably went home to crash.
Well, you only live a
few blocks away, right?
Right, right, I'll
give him a call.
(SIGHS)
(PHONE RINGS)
Oh, boy.
(PHONE RINGS)
Well, I guess I'll go home.
No worries.
I'm sure he's there,
tucked away in a coma.
Has he ever done this before?
Yeah.
Last time he got stoned,
it was so creepy.
We were visiting my sister
in Vermont and he got high
with my brother-in-law,
started talkin' to himself
and then wandered
into the woods alone.
Got back to the
house close to dawn
and crawled into bed with me.
(THUNDER CLAPS)
Crying softly.
He slept for 12 hours.
That's why I didn't want
him to smoke tonight.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Well, I can see why you
don't want the old boy
hittin' the pipe hard like
that, but hey, take comfort
in the fact that at some
point during the night,
he'll just come slitherin'
right back to ya.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
What a strange evening.
Mm.
(MOANS)
What, what's that?
What a strange evening.
Yeah.
Yeah, Tom is strange.
You know, aside from the
drool, I kinda like him.
Do you?
Yeah.
I do.
He's creative, you know?
I think he may be
an excellent actor.
Should I call and check on
Esmerelda, see if Tom's there?
Oh, well, yeah.
You can call on our
way out in the morning.
I'm sure they're fine.
She's fine.
(OMINOUS TONES)
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
(TOM MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
(EERIE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(TOM MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Please, come on,
come on, come on.
(MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
(CHUCKLES AND
MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Gotta get it, I
gotta make the call.
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(DARK STRING MUSIC)
(BAG RUSTLES)
(GRUNTS)
(BAG RUSTLES)
(DOOR CREAK)
(WATER SPLASHES)
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
(DOORS CREAK)
(BAG RUSTLES)
("AND THE GLORY OF THE LORD")
(DOORS CREAK)
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the glory of
the Lord shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
(BUTCHER SPEAKS
FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
- You like Mexico?
- Sure.
- Viva la Mexico!
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
Hey, amigo, I have
something for you.
Can you store this in
your big freezer for me?
No, amigo, my boss not let me.
Here you go.
I really need your help.
Okay.
I make room.
Two more things.
You gotta hide it so no
one knows it's there,
and nobody can look inside.
Nobody.
No problemo.
I move box fish and I
hide it in the back.
- Thanks.
- Okay.
I trust you, man, yeah.
Muchas gracias.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hello?
Hi, is this Tom Cain speaking?
- Yeah.
- Oh, hi, Tom.
Ron Womack here, director
for the film Cut and Chop.
Oh, hey there.
I know it's a bit unorthodox
for me to be callin' you,
but I just wanted to, one of
my producers got your voicemail
this morning regarding
conflict for shoot day,
so I just wanted to call and
clear things up directly.
What're we looking at here, Tom?
Well, I'm gonna have to
skedaddle on out of the country
here next week and I can't
have too many questions asked,
but someone has died.
Oh, I see, is everything okay?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, let me see here.
All right, you know, you're
not making things easy
on my end, Tom, but let
me see what I can do.
When exactly are you leaving?
Well, I'll be gone this time
next week, so next Saturday.
Okay, I'm gonna arrange
to shoot your stuff
early this week.
As you know, this is
a low-budget film,
so you're kinda putting
me in a bind here
with locations and whatnot,
but I'm friends with the owner,
so I should be able to get
you in the shoot this week.
TOM: Oh, great!
Yeah, now this isn't
how we normally do things
in the business,
but you're perfect.
I mean, spot-on for the role.
Thank you.
RON: I hope that
a few days gives you
enough time to prepare.
TOM: Oh, you don't
have to worry about that.
Splendid, so you're good with
everything else, otherwise?
TOM: Mm-hm, everything
is rare and fine.
All right.
(BUSY TONE DRONES)
Hm?
Hm.
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
Oh, yeah.
Oh!
I wish you'd do some more
of those downward dogs,
so daddy can watch.
I think I gave you enough
downward dog action last night.
Daddy want some more?
Daddy always wants more.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
- Daddy will get.
- Oh, yeah.
Woof!
(GLADYS SCOFFS)
I'm kinda worried.
Oh, yeah?
About what, pumpernickel?
Esmerelda hasn't
responded to any of my texts
since yesterday,
it's not like her.
Well, I'm sure old Tom
boy has her deep and planted
in downward dog about right now.
(CHUCKLES) That's all you
think about, downward dogs.
Oh, no.
That or the old piledriver.
(GLADYS CHUCKLES)
But that one can get old.
Sometimes you
really show your age.
Those whiskers don't fool me.
Oh, yeah?
(GLADYS LAUGHS)
Okay.
- That was funny, momma.
- Yes, it was funny.
- Yeah, papa's gonna show you.
- What's papa gonna show me?
It's right over here, and
you're gonna really enjoy.
Here, hop aboard, okay.
Oh, no, no, no, where
are we going? (LAUGHS)
No, no, no, I was just kidding.
("UNA FURTIVA LAGRIMA")
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(PHONE RINGS)
(PHONE RINGS)
Hey, Gladys.
GLADYS: Tom?
Is this Esmerelda's?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I want you
to know that me and Esmerelda
got into a quarrel yesterday
and she left this morning
to go to her mom's for a few
days to blow off some steam.
She left her phone with you?
TOM: Well, yeah, she wanted
to clear the head fully.
I don't understand,
it seems kind of abrupt,
and not to infringe
on your privacy, Tom,
but she would usually tell me.
Especially if she was
going out of town.
Well, it was her decision and
I think that maybe me and LA
were causing her some anxiety.
Kind of at a loss for words.
And I don't wanna put
you and Burt on the spot
but I was wondering if
you two would come over
for dinner tomorrow night.
It's just that I'm feeling
down since the argument and
well, you two are the closest
thing that I have to friends.
Yeah, let me talk to Burt.
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
I'm sure we can make
it over for dinner
tomorrow night after work, 7:30?
Voila.
So, I'm assuming Esmerelda
won't make it into
the showroom tomorrow?
TOM: Right.
So, shall I tell them
anything at work, then?
No, no, no, I'm sure she'll
handle it from her mom's.
Okay.
TOM: And don't worry,
Esmerelda's in great hands.
And by the way, don't bother
bringing anything over
for dinner tomorrow
night, I'll be cooking.
(KNIFE THUDS)
(BUSY TONE DRONES)
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
Everything all
right, sweetheart?
I don't know.
We're having dinner
with Tom tomorrow night.
Huh.
Only Tom, huh?
Only Tom.
(TOM GASPS)
Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey.
Companies comin',
a feast will makey.
(SMOOTH JAZZ MUSIC)
(BELLS RING)
(CLERK CHUCKLES)
You got the itch.
Oh, yeah, you know it.
You own this place, right?
Since 1987.
Well I've got
somethin' for you.
It's a trade of sorts, like
in the olden days of west.
Between a cowboy and a
cheeseparing proprietor.
- What's in the bag?
- Red meat.
It's the freshest
you'll ever get.
Really?
(CHUCKLES)
Wow!
It's good!
Toothsome.
- What is it, Filet Mignon?
- It is.
Oh, I get it.
So you want my whiskey
for your Filet Mignon?
That's right.
Well...
Top shelf?
Take all of it.
All? No, no, no.
I was thinking maybe six
steaks for that one there.
(CLERK LAUGHS)
- Six?
- No, no, no, I'm serious.
I can't give you
more than eight.
I've got people coming
over for dinner tonight,
and I have to save some
of the fine cuts there.
Well, then okay,
then we'll do that,
but then I'll give you some
whiskey from right over there.
- It'd be perfect.
- No, no, no!
God damn it, I'm taking
the bottom shelf.
If you want eight, I'm taking
the best bourbon you got.
Okay, fine!
Okay, okay, okay.
Let me taste it,
I wanna taste it.
Now, to be honest with you,
I wouldn't marinade
or over-spice that.
The natural flavor
is unparalleled.
(CHUCKLES) It almost
makes me miss her.
Well...
Until next time
you get the itch.
Yeah, next time.
(BELLS RING)
(JAUNTY HARMONICA MUSIC)
Why do you have that?
Oh, I was gonna
let Tom read it.
Shouldn't he just wait
and see the actual movie?
No, what I have here
is completely different
that what's gonna be made.
(CHUCKLES) I haven't
even been invited to set.
(FOOTSTEPS CLACK)
Hey, man.
How's it goin'?
Hi, can I help you?
Oh, yeah, just here
with my girlfriend.
She's pickin' out some wine.
Wow, you guys have some
great selections here.
Hey, your friend, the
one you come here with.
What's his name?
Oh, uh, Tom.
Tom?
BURT: Yeah.
Oh, right.
Hey, look. (CHUCKLES)
I'm sorry about the other
night, he had a little bit
too much of the
Cerveza. (CHUCKLES)
When you see him next?
Well, actually, we're going
over to his apartment tonight
to have a little dinner.
You tell him, come here quick.
I can't (SPEAKS FOREIGN
LANGUAGE), I lose my job!
- Because of Tom?
- Si, senor.
Well, why?
Stay away.
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(DOOR CREAKS)
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
(DOOR THUDS)
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
Hello!
Finishing touches.
Follow me.
("FANTAISIE-IMPROMPTU")
(DOOR SQUEAKS)
(DOOR SQUEAKS)
Huh.
Well, Tom.
You've really outdone yourself.
Don't mention it.
Sit, sit, please.
("NOCTURNE NO. 20")
All right.
Now, Burt, I've got somethin'
that I know you and me
will enjoy, but Gladys,
I highly suggest that
you partake as well.
I recommend we start with this,
and then move on to the red
wine which you all brought,
which will pair oh so
well with the delicacy
that I've prepared for us.
Well, Tom, I mean,
this is really amazing.
I mean, I have to ask you,
though, I mean, why so fancy?
We were thinking more along
the lines of chicken and beer.
(GLADYS AND BURT CHUCKLE)
Well, you two showed us such
a nice time the other evening
that I feel compelled.
Plus, I feel rotten about
haven gotten so leathered up
the other evening and
making a fool of myself
that I wanted to make it up to
you and Esemerelda, you know?
Well, this is all
very impressive.
BURT: Yeah, very impressive.
Just you wait.
Good.
Let's cheers.
To new friends.
Cheers.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Cheers.
Hm.
Tom, this is place
looks immaculate.
Do you guys hire a
cleaning service?
(LAUGHS) I clean.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, Esmerelda
doesn't strike me as the type
of gal that would keep a place
in perfect order like this.
I can really see what
she sees in you, Tom.
This is very sweet of
you and quite unexpected.
Speaking of Esmerelda,
have you spoken to her yet?
Quite a lot, actually,
but she won't talk back.
It's very odd.
Peter, the owner of our store,
got a text from her this
morning when he got into work
saying she couldn't come in
'cause of a death in the family?
He tried calling her back
but she wouldn't answer.
He was pretty upset how she
called out of work via text,
instead of calling him, and he
asked me if I knew anything.
You know, knowing
we were friends.
What did you say?
After talking to you
yesterday, what could I say?
I had to lie and say I
didn't know anything.
I mean, if she chooses to lie,
I'm sure it's for a good reason.
- Do you still have her phone?
- Yeah, of course, yeah.
It's so odd that
she didn't take
her phone with her to her mom's.
Oh, no, no, she must've texted
Peter from her mom's phone.
Thought about that?
I didn't think of that.
Is that who you've been calling,
her mom, to talk to her,
since she doesn't
have her phone?
Yeah.
Yeah, but (CHUCKLES) nevermind
that, let's drink up.
We have a fine bourbon
before us here.
Oh yeah, well (CHUCKLES) I'm
not opposed to that, brother.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Well, that about does her.
I hope you guys are hungry.
Oh, hey!
Absolutely, man.
Hey, what do you
have in there, huh?
It smells extraordinary.
(TOM LAUGHS)
And extraordinary it is.
Yeah, this is gonna take
a hot minute to cool,
so I prepared us an appetizer.
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
Hope you guys like tartare.
(BURT LAUGHS)
Wow!
Hot damn!
I love me some tartare.
(FOOD SQUELCHES)
Ah.
Now, that looks
good right there.
That is one
fine-lookin' tartare.
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
Now look at that right there.
Wow.
It's good.
There you go.
Some crackers.
Oh, yeah.
Mm!
Mm.
Mm.
Mm, mm, mm.
So what do you think?
Well, it's pretty good,
but it has kind of a, um,
kind of a strange taste to it.
Kind of a funk, you know?
But hell, I like
funk. (CHUCKLES)
TOM: Me, too.
Gladys?
You gonna try?
I'm not a big fan of tartare.
BURT: Sweetie, now come on.
It takes a lot of effort to
make tartare, just try some.
Mm-hm.
Oh, I almost forgot.
You two wanna get high?
No, not me, you two.
Oh, well yeah, sure.
Yes, I would love to smoke,
having just come off work.
- Do you have any bud?
- Oh, yeah, Esmerelda's.
She won't mind at all.
- Really, are you sure?
- Yeah.
Of course not.
(DOORS CREAK)
What the fuck?
Oh, I know, right?
I mean, who would've thought Tom
was the housewife
of the century?
That's not what
I'm talking about.
Something's off.
Oh, I don't know.
I mean, I just think
he's a kookie actor.
He seems too excited
for us to be here.
I expected to lick
wounds with him
over his fight with Esmerelda.
Yeah, well, I mean,
I think he's just a
little socially awkward.
He's just trying to put
on a good show for us.
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Well, look, either
way, he's an original,
and true eccentricity
is few and far between.
I just wanna know
Esmerelda's all right.
Found it.
("NOCTURNE NO. 20")
A final toast before we begin.
To Esmerelda.
- To Esmerelda.
- To Esmerelda.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Look great.
(OMINOUS TONES)
I'm glad you guys
aren't vegetarians.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, right.
I typically shy
away from red meat,
but since you've gone
through so much trouble,
and now that I'm baked,
I'd probably eat anything.
Yeah, Tom.
What kind of meat is this?
Veal.
- Veal, huh?
- Mm-hm.
Well...
I gotta say, it's
quite sumptuous.
Haven't had veal in a long time.
I've never had veal before.
It's pretty good.
Sweet.
Yeah.
Sweet.
It is very sweet.
Sweeter than I recall
veal tasting, Tom.
Where'd you get this veal?
Was it the meat market
around the corner?
Yeah.
Well, we stopped by there
earlier on the way over.
That, uh, butcher there, he...
He seemed rather unhinged.
What do you think?
I think he cuts
a hell of a steak.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Yeah.
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
Mm.
Tom?
I gotta say.
That was absolutely delicious.
Thank you.
Burt, uh, will you come
in the back room with me?
I wanna show you something.
It's somethin' I've
been working on and, uh,
I think you'll appreciate
it as an artist.
Oh, sure.
You know, I wanna show you
somethin' as well, Tom.
TOM: Really?
Yeah.
Gladys, uh, smoke as
much of that as you want.
Thanks.
I'm not trying to be
rude, but we're probably
gonna take off
pretty soon, though.
I've got an early
day of work tomorrow.
Okay.
Shall we?
Yeah, sure.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Wow.
Spacious, Tom.
("MOONLIGHT SONATA")
This painting here, Tom.
Was that yours or
Esmerelda's choice?
What do you think?
I don't know.
Feel free to smoke
a cigarette in here.
Well, you sure?
Yeah, you never know
when it might be your last.
(BURT CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Yeah, well, cool.
Don't mind if I do.
What you got there, Tom?
Well, this is part of
what I wanted to show you.
Come on down and take a look.
Well, okay, sure.
(CHOKES)
(CHOKES)
(TOM GRUNTS)
(DOORS CREAK)
- Where's Burt?
- Helping me with my work.
- Work?
- Creative.
Could you tell Burt we
need to be goin' soon?
TOM: Soon.
(GLADYS CHOKES)
(FLESH TEARS)
(BODY CLUNKS)
(BLOOD DRIPS)
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
(WOMAN WHINES)
Cut!
Okay, I really need to
talk to you about him.
I cannot work with
this guy anymore.
Everything's going
fine, it's perfect.
It's not okay, what
he's doing afterwards.
No, it's perfect, he's giving
you so much to work off of.
Look, I don't feel safe,
you have to understand that.
He's acting.
Everything is going fine,
nothing's going to happen to you.
He's doing the same thing,
even after you call cut.
I'm telling you, I
do not feel safe.
I really need you
to talk to him.
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
("AND THE GLORY OF THE LORD")
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the glory of
the Lord shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken ♪
♪ It ♪
♪ Hath spoken ♪
♪ It ♪
("WALTZ IN C SHARP MINOR")
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
What do you want tonight?
You know what I want, baby.
Pork chops again?
Mm.
Maybe.
Excuse me?
Could we get three
beef flaps, please?
Thanks.
Can I help you?
Shh.
Can I get a pound
of ground beef?
Sure.
Anything else?
Not today.
You enjoy this?
Excuse me, friend?
Your work here.
Yes, sir, yes.
I thought so.
("UNA FURTIVA LAGRIMA")
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
That was too much, Tom.
I thought you might
like it, you know?
What is wrong with you?
(SOBS)
(MOODY HARP MUSIC)
Well, just the two of us.
It's cold in here.
You know what it is?
I'm worried.
Well, just the two of us.
Cold in here.
Please, take your time...
Don't ask me to
run lines with you.
What is that smell?
What?
That smell, it's rotten.
Gross!
Go put it in the garbage
chute in the hall!
What are you doing?
Are you stealing all this?
Answer me!
Yeah.
I won't get caught.
What?
I don't understand, why
are you taking these items?
It's a surprise.
(MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Two of us.
(ESMERELDA SIGHS)
Well, just the two of us.
Cold in here.
Don't forget we have dinner
with Gladys and Burt tomorrow.
(TOM SOFTLY GRUNTS)
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(BELLS RING)
(BLUES MUSIC)
- Hot day today.
- Oh, yeah.
It's gonna get hotter.
That'll be two dollars.
(REGISTER BLEEPS)
(REGISTER DINGS)
Hey, can I see that there?
- You mean this one?
- Oh, yeah, that one.
CLERK: Certainly.
Oh-ho-ho.
How much?
Now, cowboy, most people, $70.
For you?
$60.
Thief.
(CLERK CHUCKLES)
Thief?
Come on.
Okay, look.
$60 to take it.
I want it but not today.
All right, all right,
all right, final offer.
$55.
Not today.
(CAN HISSES)
(GULPS)
(BELCHES)
And that's a no.
("AEOLIAN HARP")
Hey, pretty lady.
We're still on for dinner
with the boys tonight?
Of course.
I need to see Tom
be more social.
Did you just get in?
Yeah!
Me and Burt went to
Piano Bar last night.
Let's just say momma
had one too many.
I was thinking for tonight if
you two wanna come over early,
we could have a
little smoke session.
Need to cut back
on the cocktails
so these laugh lines
don't get any deeper.
Yeah, sounds great.
Tom doesn't really get high,
though, it makes him act weird,
but I'm sure he'll
bring his flask.
Well, I'm positive him and
Burt will get along, then.
(ESMERELDA SIGHS)
You look under the weather.
Gettin' enough rest?
Not last night.
Tom is driving me crazy.
GLADYS: Talk to me, honey.
He's at it again.
- Ass to mouth?
- No!
Must have him confused
with Gina's beau, Walter.
What, then?
He's biting me, like,
every other time he gets off.
Hm.
Well?
Do you enjoy it?
Kind of.
But not when he takes
chunks out of me.
That's the punishment we
deserve by dating younger men.
Little creeps. (LAUGHS)
I'm joking.
No, this is serious,
he shouldn't bite you.
You have to put an end
to that shit, honey.
But honestly, it
sounds kind of steamy.
I've never really been bit.
No, this is serious.
Okay, I wanna show
you, come here.
(GASPS) Oh, my god!
This is serious!
- I know.
- You have to end it.
No!
No, he just moved in.
I know, but it'll
get dirtier, trust me.
I was dating a guy a few
years ago named Tony,
who started choking me
every time he got off,
but after a month, the poor
little man couldn't cum,
unless I was on the verge of
passing out from suffocation!
I told him to back off, right?
I think he thought I was using
reverse psychology on him,
and that I was really wanting
a tighter grip on my neck.
So I blacked out, woke
up a few minutes later,
saw Tony at the foot of my bed,
eating rocky road ice cream.
(TONY LAUGHS)
Selfish prick.
I told him to get the fuck
out and never come back.
I'm telling you,
it could get nasty.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Strange.
This one's strange.
Yeah, I know.
I think he's a
kleptomaniac, too.
Please don't tell
anyone, not even Burt.
What?
That's...
Well, I guess I'll keep my
belongings close to me tonight.
No, no, he
doesn't steal things
from people that
he actually knows.
He just takes odd, invaluable
objects from random places
like gadgets from gas stations,
and cheap food from
grocery stores,
knives from pawn shops.
He is a strange little man.
What've you gotten yourself
into with this one?
I don't know.
But it's the complex
ones that hook us, right?
(GLADYS SIGHS)
(DOOR CREAKS)
Tom?
Tom Cain?
Come in.
Break a limb.
(DOOR CREAKS)
(HEELS CLACK)
Hello, Tom.
I'm Ron, the director.
To my left is the
casting director, Lisa,
and to my right is
the producer, Roberto.
So you will be reading
with Lisa today.
She'll have you slate
your name and height,
and you can begin
whenever you're ready.
There's also a
chair to your right,
if you'd like to use
that for your audition.
Okay.
Any questions before you begin?
Are you afraid?
You should be.
My name's Tom Cain and
I'm five-foot-nine.
("SCOOBIDOO LOVE")
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
(LISA CHOKES)
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to kiss ♪
♪ It is such a good
night to dance ♪
♪ It is such a good night
to scoobidoo-doobidoo ♪
♪ Scoobidoo-Doobidoo,
scoobidoo-doobidoo love ♪
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(BLOOD SQUELCHES)
(TRAFFIC HUMS)
(BIRDS TWEET)
(DOOR CREAKS)
Tom Cain?
Come in.
(DOOR CREAKS)
Well, it's good to
see you again, Tom.
We've been waiting for you.
Take a seat, if you like.
I'll stand.
Well, we decided to call you
in today, not for a callback,
but to offer you the role.
We're holding callbacks for
some other roles this afternoon,
but decided to go ahead and
offer you the role in person,
considering that you
don't have representation.
Your audition last
week blew us away.
We showed your audition
tape to the rest of the team
and without a
doubt, we all agree,
you are the one for the role.
Well, what do ya say, Tom?
Have we found our
antagonist in Cut and Chop?
(KNOCKS)
Hey!
- Good to see you again!
- You too.
BURT: You must be Tom.
We give hugs.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hey, pretty lady!
- Hi!
- Thanks for coming.
- Of course.
- Hi, Tom.
- Hello.
Nice to see you again.
Burt, I can't believe
you and Tom have never met.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, well, I know.
It seems like it probably
should've happened already.
You and Gladys have been
working together for what,
half a year now?
Almost eight months?
We've been trying to get the
four of us together ever since.
And that's the way
the cookie crumbles.
Yeah, well, crumbling
cookies and all,
it's time we all made
up for some lost time.
So, make yourselves
at home, have a seat.
Tom, can I get you a drink?
TOM: Sure.
Now, I had some beer, but
I drank it all last night.
But, I can offer you
some fine whiskey.
Oh, I brought some, too.
Oh, yeah?
My kinda man.
How about you take
a shot out of mine,
and then I take a shot out
of whatever you pour me?
You know what?
I like the way you think.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
I got myself this
vintage whiskey here
when I sold my first
screenplay recently.
- Oh, you're a writer?
- Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
I sold a script for
some laughable amount
to this little indie
production company,
but I was real happy
with the process,
so I treated myself
to that whiskey.
Congrats, are they gonna
keep you on for rewrites?
Oh, no, they got these
young Hollywood hustlers
saying they're gonna
come in, tear it apart,
put it back together again.
Basically, Tom, they
just bought my idea,
and they want me out
of it. (CHUCKLES)
But hell, I don't care.
I mean, I'm happy, it's the
first thing I ever sold.
Hey.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
(GLASSES CLINK)
(BURT COUGHS)
- Oh, my god. (COUGHS)
- Mm, mm-mm-mm.
- Damn!
- That's tasty.
Oh, my god.
What the hell was that?
Oh, that's an out-of-work
actor's pour. (CHUCKLES)
Well, it looks like Burt
and Tom are gettin' along.
Yeah, that's odd.
Tom does not warm up
to people quickly.
(CHUCKLES) Well, Burt
has a way about him.
And it looks like
they're both warming up
quickly with that whiskey.
As long as Tom doesn't
get carried away
and take a bite out
of my little Burt.
I'm just happy
to see him smiling.
Hey, ladies?
Care for a little drink?
I told you, baby, I'm gonna
lay off the sauce tonight.
You want one?
Yeah, maybe I'll have something
simple like a vodka tonic?
Make vodka tonic
for our guest, dear.
Comin' up!
All right.
Oh, you could make
another one of those,
I'll drink it
before we head out.
Sure thing, pal.
(ICE CUBES CLINK)
Splash of vodka.
Now for the best part.
No, no, no, I'm okay.
Oh, all right.
- Shall we?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Oh, that tastes good.
- Here you go.
- Thanks.
- Here you go, baby.
- Oh, okay, yeah.
Thank you, sweetie.
Well, yeah, we were
just gonna go out
and hit the grocery and get
a little six pack, but uh,
Tom, you wanna smoke?
Why not?
You're gonna smoke, baby?
Don't worry.
Hey, are you sure?
It didn't hit you in a
good place last time.
I wasn't happy
then, I'm happy now.
Happy for my new friend.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Nice, pal.
(TOM EXHALES)
Let's get nasty.
(RAIN SPLASHES)
So, you're an actor, huh?
You working on any
projects at the moment?
Perhaps I am right now.
TOM: Yeah, I booked a
role for an indie film today.
Really?
We'll have to go
celebrate, congratulations.
Yeah, what kind of role was it?
Oh, I'd rather not go into it.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Now, that's a first.
I think you're the only
actor I've ever met
that didn't wanna
talk about himself,
or the role he was playing.
(TOM CHUCKLES)
Well, I haven't
told Esmerelda yet.
Oh.
Okay.
Probably for a good reason.
I can respect that.
Yeah.
Well, shall we?
("THE BLUE DANUBE")
Repetition,
repetition, repetition.
Huh, I knew it.
Meisner.
What?
Yeah, you studied
the Meisner technique.
Serious method acting.
Meisner.
Yeah.
Hold on.
(CHUCKLES)
Yeah, yeah, hey, sweetie.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, we're at the grocery.
Mm-hm.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, let me ask.
Tom?
The girls are ordering
Pho, you want any...
Beef, tendon and tripe.
Yeah, beef, tendon and tripe.
Got it. (CHUCKLES)
Okay, see you soon, sweetie.
Okay, bye.
All right.
Hola, amigo.
No more chopping today.
You like to watch
more than buy, huh?
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
BUTCHER: You look
like you want my job.
(DISTORTED VOICE) -
You do want my job!
Hey, you've got the wrong guy.
Amigo, I see you every day.
(CHUCKLES)
(SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
("NOCTURNE IN B FLAT MINOR")
God bless this food,
God bless our bodies.
In Christ's name, we pray.
Amen.
Yeah.
(ESMERELDA CHUCKLES)
BURT: This all
looks so tantalizing.
(TOM SIGHS)
Do you have any hot sauce?
- Hot sauce?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- There you go.
- Oh, my favorite.
Yeah, you can't put enough
of that stuff on there.
I tell you what. (CHUCKLES)
Mm!
Oh, this is good.
Yeah.
Tom, get after those wings.
(FOOD CRUNCHES AND SQUELCHES)
So you guys are
leaving tomorrow, right?
Yeah.
We'll be on Balboa Island
for the rest of the weekend.
My aunt has a place there.
She coaxed us to stay while
she's gonna be in Berlin.
Oh, that sounds fun.
Right?
You should come out
there at some point.
My Uncle Bob could take
us out on the yacht.
ESMERELDA: Oh!
BURT: I'm fearful of Bob.
He has a yacht and a
better mustache than me.
(GROUP CHUCKLES)
Seriously, sweetie, didn't you
say he used to own one of the
largest real estate investment
companies in all Los Angeles?
Mm-hm, at one point.
I think he sold it to Warren
Buffet in the early '90s.
And now he spends his
entire retirement trying
to lure young bikini-clad
women onto his yacht.
I mean, it's a dirty job
but someone has to do it.
Oh, one day, sugar loaf.
One day that'll
be papa. (LAUGHS)
(TOM MOANS)
ESMERELDA: So Burt, Gladys
tells me that you're a writer.
Mm, yeah.
ESMERELDA: What kind
of stuff are you writin'?
Oh, screenplays mainly, yeah.
I was telling Tom
about one earlier.
A little horror film
I've been working on.
Has more of an
ominous feel to it.
And I've got another one
that I've been working on.
It's more loosely based
on my adolescence.
So that one's (CHUCKLES) more
of a pornographic nature.
(LAUGHS)
(TOM MOANS)
(LAUGHS)
(COUGHS)
Hey, you got some more
of that whiskey back there?
- Oh, boy.
- Tom.
Hey, Tom.
I think you've had
enough to drink tonight.
It's okay.
I've got the actor's pour.
Look, look here, buddy.
Why don't you just grab
the couch over there?
I know how this Pho can
get to a man. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah, come on.
I don't know.
Had a little too
much, that's all.
He's gonna be okay, right, yeah?
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry, guys.
Oh, no, it's okay.
That's what a couch is for,
get a little rest. (LAUGHS)
Hey, put a little more hot
sauce on that. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
GLADYS: Yeah, party down.
(WOMEN LAUGH)
Send that over here
to momma. (CHUCKLES)
- Daddy want?
- Daddy wants.
- Spice it up, daddy.
- Daddy always wants.
(GROUP CHUCKLES)
GLADYS: Yeah, it's so true.
(WOMEN CHUCKLE)
(JAUNTY ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(HEELS CLACK)
(HEELS CLACK)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Tom is missing.
GLADYS: Really?
Oh, well, he must've slid
past us without us realizing it.
Probably went home to crash.
Well, you only live a
few blocks away, right?
Right, right, I'll
give him a call.
(SIGHS)
(PHONE RINGS)
Oh, boy.
(PHONE RINGS)
Well, I guess I'll go home.
No worries.
I'm sure he's there,
tucked away in a coma.
Has he ever done this before?
Yeah.
Last time he got stoned,
it was so creepy.
We were visiting my sister
in Vermont and he got high
with my brother-in-law,
started talkin' to himself
and then wandered
into the woods alone.
Got back to the
house close to dawn
and crawled into bed with me.
(THUNDER CLAPS)
Crying softly.
He slept for 12 hours.
That's why I didn't want
him to smoke tonight.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Well, I can see why you
don't want the old boy
hittin' the pipe hard like
that, but hey, take comfort
in the fact that at some
point during the night,
he'll just come slitherin'
right back to ya.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
What a strange evening.
Mm.
(MOANS)
What, what's that?
What a strange evening.
Yeah.
Yeah, Tom is strange.
You know, aside from the
drool, I kinda like him.
Do you?
Yeah.
I do.
He's creative, you know?
I think he may be
an excellent actor.
Should I call and check on
Esmerelda, see if Tom's there?
Oh, well, yeah.
You can call on our
way out in the morning.
I'm sure they're fine.
She's fine.
(OMINOUS TONES)
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
(TOM MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
(EERIE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)
(TOM MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Please, come on,
come on, come on.
(MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
(CHUCKLES AND
MUMBLES TO HIMSELF)
Gotta get it, I
gotta make the call.
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(SINGS OPERATICALLY)
(KNIFE THUDS)
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(DARK STRING MUSIC)
(BAG RUSTLES)
(GRUNTS)
(BAG RUSTLES)
(DOOR CREAK)
(WATER SPLASHES)
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed ♪
(DOORS CREAK)
(BAG RUSTLES)
("AND THE GLORY OF THE LORD")
(DOORS CREAK)
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the glory of
the Lord shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
(BUTCHER SPEAKS
FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
- You like Mexico?
- Sure.
- Viva la Mexico!
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
Hey, amigo, I have
something for you.
Can you store this in
your big freezer for me?
No, amigo, my boss not let me.
Here you go.
I really need your help.
Okay.
I make room.
Two more things.
You gotta hide it so no
one knows it's there,
and nobody can look inside.
Nobody.
No problemo.
I move box fish and I
hide it in the back.
- Thanks.
- Okay.
I trust you, man, yeah.
Muchas gracias.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hello?
Hi, is this Tom Cain speaking?
- Yeah.
- Oh, hi, Tom.
Ron Womack here, director
for the film Cut and Chop.
Oh, hey there.
I know it's a bit unorthodox
for me to be callin' you,
but I just wanted to, one of
my producers got your voicemail
this morning regarding
conflict for shoot day,
so I just wanted to call and
clear things up directly.
What're we looking at here, Tom?
Well, I'm gonna have to
skedaddle on out of the country
here next week and I can't
have too many questions asked,
but someone has died.
Oh, I see, is everything okay?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, let me see here.
All right, you know, you're
not making things easy
on my end, Tom, but let
me see what I can do.
When exactly are you leaving?
Well, I'll be gone this time
next week, so next Saturday.
Okay, I'm gonna arrange
to shoot your stuff
early this week.
As you know, this is
a low-budget film,
so you're kinda putting
me in a bind here
with locations and whatnot,
but I'm friends with the owner,
so I should be able to get
you in the shoot this week.
TOM: Oh, great!
Yeah, now this isn't
how we normally do things
in the business,
but you're perfect.
I mean, spot-on for the role.
Thank you.
RON: I hope that
a few days gives you
enough time to prepare.
TOM: Oh, you don't
have to worry about that.
Splendid, so you're good with
everything else, otherwise?
TOM: Mm-hm, everything
is rare and fine.
All right.
(BUSY TONE DRONES)
Hm?
Hm.
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
Oh, yeah.
Oh!
I wish you'd do some more
of those downward dogs,
so daddy can watch.
I think I gave you enough
downward dog action last night.
Daddy want some more?
Daddy always wants more.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
- Daddy will get.
- Oh, yeah.
Woof!
(GLADYS SCOFFS)
I'm kinda worried.
Oh, yeah?
About what, pumpernickel?
Esmerelda hasn't
responded to any of my texts
since yesterday,
it's not like her.
Well, I'm sure old Tom
boy has her deep and planted
in downward dog about right now.
(CHUCKLES) That's all you
think about, downward dogs.
Oh, no.
That or the old piledriver.
(GLADYS CHUCKLES)
But that one can get old.
Sometimes you
really show your age.
Those whiskers don't fool me.
Oh, yeah?
(GLADYS LAUGHS)
Okay.
- That was funny, momma.
- Yes, it was funny.
- Yeah, papa's gonna show you.
- What's papa gonna show me?
It's right over here, and
you're gonna really enjoy.
Here, hop aboard, okay.
Oh, no, no, no, where
are we going? (LAUGHS)
No, no, no, I was just kidding.
("UNA FURTIVA LAGRIMA")
(FLESH SQUELCHES)
(PHONE RINGS)
(PHONE RINGS)
Hey, Gladys.
GLADYS: Tom?
Is this Esmerelda's?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I want you
to know that me and Esmerelda
got into a quarrel yesterday
and she left this morning
to go to her mom's for a few
days to blow off some steam.
She left her phone with you?
TOM: Well, yeah, she wanted
to clear the head fully.
I don't understand,
it seems kind of abrupt,
and not to infringe
on your privacy, Tom,
but she would usually tell me.
Especially if she was
going out of town.
Well, it was her decision and
I think that maybe me and LA
were causing her some anxiety.
Kind of at a loss for words.
And I don't wanna put
you and Burt on the spot
but I was wondering if
you two would come over
for dinner tomorrow night.
It's just that I'm feeling
down since the argument and
well, you two are the closest
thing that I have to friends.
Yeah, let me talk to Burt.
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
I'm sure we can make
it over for dinner
tomorrow night after work, 7:30?
Voila.
So, I'm assuming Esmerelda
won't make it into
the showroom tomorrow?
TOM: Right.
So, shall I tell them
anything at work, then?
No, no, no, I'm sure she'll
handle it from her mom's.
Okay.
TOM: And don't worry,
Esmerelda's in great hands.
And by the way, don't bother
bringing anything over
for dinner tomorrow
night, I'll be cooking.
(KNIFE THUDS)
(BUSY TONE DRONES)
(SEAGULLS SQUAWK)
Everything all
right, sweetheart?
I don't know.
We're having dinner
with Tom tomorrow night.
Huh.
Only Tom, huh?
Only Tom.
(TOM GASPS)
Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey.
Companies comin',
a feast will makey.
(SMOOTH JAZZ MUSIC)
(BELLS RING)
(CLERK CHUCKLES)
You got the itch.
Oh, yeah, you know it.
You own this place, right?
Since 1987.
Well I've got
somethin' for you.
It's a trade of sorts, like
in the olden days of west.
Between a cowboy and a
cheeseparing proprietor.
- What's in the bag?
- Red meat.
It's the freshest
you'll ever get.
Really?
(CHUCKLES)
Wow!
It's good!
Toothsome.
- What is it, Filet Mignon?
- It is.
Oh, I get it.
So you want my whiskey
for your Filet Mignon?
That's right.
Well...
Top shelf?
Take all of it.
All? No, no, no.
I was thinking maybe six
steaks for that one there.
(CLERK LAUGHS)
- Six?
- No, no, no, I'm serious.
I can't give you
more than eight.
I've got people coming
over for dinner tonight,
and I have to save some
of the fine cuts there.
Well, then okay,
then we'll do that,
but then I'll give you some
whiskey from right over there.
- It'd be perfect.
- No, no, no!
God damn it, I'm taking
the bottom shelf.
If you want eight, I'm taking
the best bourbon you got.
Okay, fine!
Okay, okay, okay.
Let me taste it,
I wanna taste it.
Now, to be honest with you,
I wouldn't marinade
or over-spice that.
The natural flavor
is unparalleled.
(CHUCKLES) It almost
makes me miss her.
Well...
Until next time
you get the itch.
Yeah, next time.
(BELLS RING)
(JAUNTY HARMONICA MUSIC)
Why do you have that?
Oh, I was gonna
let Tom read it.
Shouldn't he just wait
and see the actual movie?
No, what I have here
is completely different
that what's gonna be made.
(CHUCKLES) I haven't
even been invited to set.
(FOOTSTEPS CLACK)
Hey, man.
How's it goin'?
Hi, can I help you?
Oh, yeah, just here
with my girlfriend.
She's pickin' out some wine.
Wow, you guys have some
great selections here.
Hey, your friend, the
one you come here with.
What's his name?
Oh, uh, Tom.
Tom?
BURT: Yeah.
Oh, right.
Hey, look. (CHUCKLES)
I'm sorry about the other
night, he had a little bit
too much of the
Cerveza. (CHUCKLES)
When you see him next?
Well, actually, we're going
over to his apartment tonight
to have a little dinner.
You tell him, come here quick.
I can't (SPEAKS FOREIGN
LANGUAGE), I lose my job!
- Because of Tom?
- Si, senor.
Well, why?
Stay away.
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(DOOR CREAKS)
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
(DOOR THUDS)
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
Hello!
Finishing touches.
Follow me.
("FANTAISIE-IMPROMPTU")
(DOOR SQUEAKS)
(DOOR SQUEAKS)
Huh.
Well, Tom.
You've really outdone yourself.
Don't mention it.
Sit, sit, please.
("NOCTURNE NO. 20")
All right.
Now, Burt, I've got somethin'
that I know you and me
will enjoy, but Gladys,
I highly suggest that
you partake as well.
I recommend we start with this,
and then move on to the red
wine which you all brought,
which will pair oh so
well with the delicacy
that I've prepared for us.
Well, Tom, I mean,
this is really amazing.
I mean, I have to ask you,
though, I mean, why so fancy?
We were thinking more along
the lines of chicken and beer.
(GLADYS AND BURT CHUCKLE)
Well, you two showed us such
a nice time the other evening
that I feel compelled.
Plus, I feel rotten about
haven gotten so leathered up
the other evening and
making a fool of myself
that I wanted to make it up to
you and Esemerelda, you know?
Well, this is all
very impressive.
BURT: Yeah, very impressive.
Just you wait.
Good.
Let's cheers.
To new friends.
Cheers.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Cheers.
Hm.
Tom, this is place
looks immaculate.
Do you guys hire a
cleaning service?
(LAUGHS) I clean.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, Esmerelda
doesn't strike me as the type
of gal that would keep a place
in perfect order like this.
I can really see what
she sees in you, Tom.
This is very sweet of
you and quite unexpected.
Speaking of Esmerelda,
have you spoken to her yet?
Quite a lot, actually,
but she won't talk back.
It's very odd.
Peter, the owner of our store,
got a text from her this
morning when he got into work
saying she couldn't come in
'cause of a death in the family?
He tried calling her back
but she wouldn't answer.
He was pretty upset how she
called out of work via text,
instead of calling him, and he
asked me if I knew anything.
You know, knowing
we were friends.
What did you say?
After talking to you
yesterday, what could I say?
I had to lie and say I
didn't know anything.
I mean, if she chooses to lie,
I'm sure it's for a good reason.
- Do you still have her phone?
- Yeah, of course, yeah.
It's so odd that
she didn't take
her phone with her to her mom's.
Oh, no, no, she must've texted
Peter from her mom's phone.
Thought about that?
I didn't think of that.
Is that who you've been calling,
her mom, to talk to her,
since she doesn't
have her phone?
Yeah.
Yeah, but (CHUCKLES) nevermind
that, let's drink up.
We have a fine bourbon
before us here.
Oh yeah, well (CHUCKLES) I'm
not opposed to that, brother.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Well, that about does her.
I hope you guys are hungry.
Oh, hey!
Absolutely, man.
Hey, what do you
have in there, huh?
It smells extraordinary.
(TOM LAUGHS)
And extraordinary it is.
Yeah, this is gonna take
a hot minute to cool,
so I prepared us an appetizer.
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
Hope you guys like tartare.
(BURT LAUGHS)
Wow!
Hot damn!
I love me some tartare.
(FOOD SQUELCHES)
Ah.
Now, that looks
good right there.
That is one
fine-lookin' tartare.
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
Now look at that right there.
Wow.
It's good.
There you go.
Some crackers.
Oh, yeah.
Mm!
Mm.
Mm.
Mm, mm, mm.
So what do you think?
Well, it's pretty good,
but it has kind of a, um,
kind of a strange taste to it.
Kind of a funk, you know?
But hell, I like
funk. (CHUCKLES)
TOM: Me, too.
Gladys?
You gonna try?
I'm not a big fan of tartare.
BURT: Sweetie, now come on.
It takes a lot of effort to
make tartare, just try some.
Mm-hm.
Oh, I almost forgot.
You two wanna get high?
No, not me, you two.
Oh, well yeah, sure.
Yes, I would love to smoke,
having just come off work.
- Do you have any bud?
- Oh, yeah, Esmerelda's.
She won't mind at all.
- Really, are you sure?
- Yeah.
Of course not.
(DOORS CREAK)
What the fuck?
Oh, I know, right?
I mean, who would've thought Tom
was the housewife
of the century?
That's not what
I'm talking about.
Something's off.
Oh, I don't know.
I mean, I just think
he's a kookie actor.
He seems too excited
for us to be here.
I expected to lick
wounds with him
over his fight with Esmerelda.
Yeah, well, I mean,
I think he's just a
little socially awkward.
He's just trying to put
on a good show for us.
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Well, look, either
way, he's an original,
and true eccentricity
is few and far between.
I just wanna know
Esmerelda's all right.
Found it.
("NOCTURNE NO. 20")
A final toast before we begin.
To Esmerelda.
- To Esmerelda.
- To Esmerelda.
(GLASSES CLINK)
Look great.
(OMINOUS TONES)
I'm glad you guys
aren't vegetarians.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, right.
I typically shy
away from red meat,
but since you've gone
through so much trouble,
and now that I'm baked,
I'd probably eat anything.
Yeah, Tom.
What kind of meat is this?
Veal.
- Veal, huh?
- Mm-hm.
Well...
I gotta say, it's
quite sumptuous.
Haven't had veal in a long time.
I've never had veal before.
It's pretty good.
Sweet.
Yeah.
Sweet.
It is very sweet.
Sweeter than I recall
veal tasting, Tom.
Where'd you get this veal?
Was it the meat market
around the corner?
Yeah.
Well, we stopped by there
earlier on the way over.
That, uh, butcher there, he...
He seemed rather unhinged.
What do you think?
I think he cuts
a hell of a steak.
(BURT CHUCKLES)
Yeah.
("SYMPHONY NO. 9, MOVEMENT 2")
Mm.
Tom?
I gotta say.
That was absolutely delicious.
Thank you.
Burt, uh, will you come
in the back room with me?
I wanna show you something.
It's somethin' I've
been working on and, uh,
I think you'll appreciate
it as an artist.
Oh, sure.
You know, I wanna show you
somethin' as well, Tom.
TOM: Really?
Yeah.
Gladys, uh, smoke as
much of that as you want.
Thanks.
I'm not trying to be
rude, but we're probably
gonna take off
pretty soon, though.
I've got an early
day of work tomorrow.
Okay.
Shall we?
Yeah, sure.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Wow.
Spacious, Tom.
("MOONLIGHT SONATA")
This painting here, Tom.
Was that yours or
Esmerelda's choice?
What do you think?
I don't know.
Feel free to smoke
a cigarette in here.
Well, you sure?
Yeah, you never know
when it might be your last.
(BURT CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Yeah, well, cool.
Don't mind if I do.
What you got there, Tom?
Well, this is part of
what I wanted to show you.
Come on down and take a look.
Well, okay, sure.
(CHOKES)
(CHOKES)
(TOM GRUNTS)
(DOORS CREAK)
- Where's Burt?
- Helping me with my work.
- Work?
- Creative.
Could you tell Burt we
need to be goin' soon?
TOM: Soon.
(GLADYS CHOKES)
(FLESH TEARS)
(BODY CLUNKS)
(BLOOD DRIPS)
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
(WOMAN WHINES)
Cut!
Okay, I really need to
talk to you about him.
I cannot work with
this guy anymore.
Everything's going
fine, it's perfect.
It's not okay, what
he's doing afterwards.
No, it's perfect, he's giving
you so much to work off of.
Look, I don't feel safe,
you have to understand that.
He's acting.
Everything is going fine,
nothing's going to happen to you.
He's doing the same thing,
even after you call cut.
I'm telling you, I
do not feel safe.
I really need you
to talk to him.
(TENSE STRING MUSIC)
(KNIFE SCRAPES)
("AND THE GLORY OF THE LORD")
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And the glory, the glory of
the Lord shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ And the glory, the
glory of the Lord ♪
♪ Shall be revealed,
shall be revealed ♪
♪ And all flesh shall
see it together ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken it ♪
♪ For the mouth of the Lord ♪
♪ Hath spoken ♪
♪ It ♪
♪ Hath spoken ♪
♪ It ♪