Crazy Alien (2019) - full transcript
A monkey trainer whose act goes wrong after an alien crash lands on Earth and injures his monkey. Desperate to perform the act, he attempts to train the alien instead, though is punished after the alien regains his powers.
CHINA FILM ADMINISTRATION
HUANXI MEDIA GROUP LIMITED (BEIJING)
DIRTY MONKEY
ENLIGHT PICTURES
follow Instagram @ broth3rmax
BASED ON "VILLAGE TEACHER NOVEL" LIU CIXIN'S WORK
Hey idiot, I guess you're a silly selfie again.
Bro, this photo will freeze TikTok all day.
Never mind, yoga teacher.
Come on, you have to give the ball.
OK.
Hold your horse, cowboy.
Your genes on the way.
I already talked, guys.
The airlock room is open.
Focus on mission.
Gen balls have arrived in the preparation room.
Captain Andrews, get ready to accept.
Oh, my God.
Aren't you sexy
when I say the hatch door is open.
Transfer procedure starts.
I heard they chose girl's DNA
to put it in here.
Girl, oh ...
He must be a fox.
Maybe you can help me
get the telephone number.
Captain Andrews, please focus on the mission.
This is live feed for the Boss.
Start the exit procedure.
Personnel, please pay attention,
the exit procedure will start in 10 seconds.
I'm in position.
Gosh dragon ...
Well, that was close.
Which stupid jerk decides if we are
have to do this exchange in the middle of the satellite?
Captain Andrews, you really don't deserve to whine.
You only know how to get Rasdian
believe our story about satellite repair.
The next satellite will fly in 21 minutes 16 seconds.
Boss, I still think that giving
our genes on aliens are very dangerous.
Sir, it's even more dangerous if another country
seize this opportunity ahead of us.
Play an alien message again.
This is the message of the most advanced civilization in this galaxy.
We want to establish diplomatic relations.
with planet Earth.
Let's exchange DNA.
By inserting a DNA ball into your mouth.
Then return it to our messenger
to complete the exchange.
The genome that we gave it
comes from a Amanika bodybuilder
which has an IQ of 180.
Well you see, that's good.
That might be one of our genes.
Only we can represent the human race.
Your hand
We keep watching the vital signs of life.
Understood.
Did you bring my food to this thing?
Busy! Very beautiful.
I fall in love.
/ Captain Andrews, control your hormones,
please focus on the mission.
/ Fine.
Starting the transfer of ball genes.
Hi, I'm Captain Zack Andrews from
United States of America.
The most developed country on planet Earth.
On behalf of mankind,
I'm here to present our DNA to you.
I think he wants it back
the DNA ball.
Captain Andrews, keep following the protocol.
Before we begin this important ceremony,
please, tell me your name.
The task to communicate with you
that of that pervert planet
disgusts me.
I don't accept your protocol
for the exchange of identity.
Low form of life.
Well.
He has a sense of humor too.
He tried to joke.
What did he do?
This photo will disable TikTok for a week.
Ready? 1 ...
2 ... sexy!
No, no, no. Do not be afraid!
This is not a weapon.
No no no, don't close the door.
Honey, honey, don't be afraid.
This is not a weapon.
Pull back your sad technology.
Stop your actions,
or you will be eliminated.
Zack! You're on the satellite line!
Get away!
Watch out! Get away!
Get away!
translation of broth3 max
A
ALIEN
ALIEN GI
CRAZY ALIEN
A L I E N G I L A
Shake your hands every day.
The mind will remain clear.
This is called a different work line,
there are different unique aspects.
The Olympics has a winner.
The monkey show has "Monkey King"
Ladies and gentlemen,
guys and girls,
we have a lot of different guests here today.
I am flattered by your presence
on the stage of Mount Huaguo.
Without further length,
I present our star today.
Huan-Huan!
Let's get on stage!
He will show attraction to all of you.
Walk across the volcano.
Come on
Come on
Turn somersaults between clouds.
Come on
Monkey sweep kick stance.
Use iron engrang.
One iron stick shook the earth.
Two iron sticks pierced the sky.
Come on
Left, right, left, right, graceful movements.
Left, right, one more time!
Give applause.
Why is Miss Huan-Huan shy
hide in the bridal train?
When men and women are married.
But I want you to give a big round of applause
to welcome our bride Huan-Huan.
This is the most sacred moment
for the life of a girl.
Huan-Huan will pay homage to the audience.
I say respect, bow now.
Nice.
He also gave me this.
He wants to choose men from the audience,
and pair the ring.
Guess who is lucky?
This is fate.
It seems like he chose you!
Look, our bride can't wait anymore
waiting for the ceremony.
Let me ask,
Are you willing to marry this sweet girl?
Yea, whatever.
Hurry up.
/ Now I ask him.
Are you willing to marry this handsome man?
Yes, he is willing.
Extraordinary.
The bride has done symbolic ...
/ Shut up!
Hello? Yes, good,
2 girls, coming soon.
You don't want to finish the monkey show?
/ This circus artisan loser monkey is lousy.
Come on, hurry up, leave.
Bring my bag.
What a moving love story!
But the groom is still running away.
This seems to be my chance now.
Ladies and gentlemen,
second marriage is also worthy of your blessing.
The bride is mine now.
Come on, dear.
Let's sleep.
That's enough for today's show.
No need to interfere with my business.
Without my presence, your stage show
can be messy today.
Everything you eat.
What did that person call you?
Circus artisan loser monkey?
See right?
Your audience knows very well.
You're always circling.
You should step forward
this is your wallet.
How can you bring my wallet?
I intended to give you a chance
invest in my business.
But what have you done?
You changed the password based on a cunning bastard.
Who are you getting protection from?
Your father, me?
Where is the money in my wallet?
Money, everything is here, don't you see?
Turtles, snakes, wolves, this is your share in our business.
I help you.
Who invited you to join the drinks business.
But you never want to switch from your stupid monkey show.
Don't you see?
nobody wants to watch the show.
You see later.
In a few days
you just wait.
Are you alone?
Add problems only
but where is the payment?
No shame in my house you made a shop
selling liquor.
This is an investment name.
Listen, this is the future we are talking about.
I collaborated with your father
can make you rich.
/ Go there!
Don't be happy first, just pay attention.
This was inspired by a movie I watched
2 days ago.
The title ...
E ... T ... is that so?
Who is the director?
What's the burger burger like?
The creature was flying using a bicycle and naked.
After I repeat, I think
invited Huang-Huang to ride his bicycle
and we fly into the air.
Not only shows
monkey rides a bicycle at the start,
but we also have dragons who follow behind.
We only need to enlarge this miniature.
Do you know the CBD that you always told me about?
KPI.
/ Yes, it is true.
KPI.
This will make your KPI skyrocket.
This idea
when combined,
you only need $ 2000.
Geng Hao.
Come down there.
Come on
Do you see who is under your feet?
Money. / This pool produces
more money than you
and you want me to invest more?
/ Not me...
I told you
we will turn your stage into a Hot Pot restaurant.
There is only a Hot Pot restaurant in the area.
It produces more than it does
your monkey show.
Hot Pot?
The monkey show ...
But the monkey show is our core job.
Are Hot Pot not?
That's ... yeah too, but ...
/ Core work that produces profit.
Your silly monkey show
different things.
That...
I mean, Hot Pot and monkey shows ...
Don't talk to my core income,
you're just a circus artisan loser monkey.
Goddess of the Beast, my genius idea was rejected.
We make money with our own abilities,
but how can it be
just a mere cliche?
And also
as long as we are still breathing
we will not give up.
This Monkey show is inherited
hereditary.
How will I behave in the future
the ancestors if I stop?
But this is not important.
As long as I'm still here.
I will not let that happen.
My father used to be a monkey show.
And now,
I will not let them call me
circus artisan loser monkey.
That's right?
I'll get my pride.
Huan-Huan,
from now on we have to work hard.
"Southwestern Monkey King"
Huan-Huan?
Huan-Huan!
Don't move.
Are you ok?
Da Fei, wake up the blind massage massage.
I go there.
Busy! This is an alien.
You are more like an alien.
You stupid.
Then you know better,
then why come here?
What do you think this creature is?
Look carefully.
His eyes 2, his mouth 1.
Hands 2.
Legs 2.
From its characteristics,
You know this is a kind of primate.
This must be a rare type of monkey.
The primate is a monkey.
The monkey is of many kinds.
Look at this neck necklace.
Seems like this ... it's a person.
I didn't ask who took care of him,
what kind of monkey am I asking for?
What do you think this is ...
I think maybe this comes from Southern Amanika.
Possible from Congo.
The scientific name ...
The point
This must have seen Huan-Huan,
and want to marry her.
He fell from my roof.
Why don't you just say that?
This scientific name is
Congolese Estrus Monkey.
Da Fei,
I've treated your monkey.
He will wake up,
if the drug runs out.
Yes, for a moment.
What is this bandage for?
Broken bones.
How long can he recover?
100 days.
Geez.
How many days did you say?
/ 100 days.
Da Fei, close the door.
Before you leave.
Go to sleep, Doctor Liao.
He lives.
He is this
it seems like I'm in good health.
You are right.
Here I check.
Open your mouth.
Yes indeed, he is 3 years old.
Look, he's scared.
He looks weird.
He is indeed a Congolese Monkey.
Because of the hot weather in Congo,
so he doesn't have hair.
This is a rare type.
Not so bad.
He can stand up.
What?
What do you want?
Basic training.
Here, look.
Finger 4.
Not good if it's sold again.
Yea, and your cousin fingers 6.
Beware of being scratched.
He invites a fight.
Are you a fighter?
Stop it!
Stay there.
Watch out, he wants to act again.
Calm down, don't let him blister.
He wants to run away.
Stop him.
Do not run.
Stop!
Stop!
Want more?
Where are you goin?
Geng Hao, confront him!
Vodka is the hardest drink for me.
I once mixed it
in noodle soup for lunch.
This American Captain shirt gives me strength.
The power that drives me to stop drinking.
That's a bit inappropriate, John.
I'm sorry, please continue.
I really believe he got special powers
recover from being drunk from the shirt.
That's very inappropriate, Larry.
I can touch it,
but can't feel anything.
I feel like a super hero.
And as long as I use this Captain America shirt,
nothing can make me want
drink again.
I won't, even though there are people pointing at me
gun to my head.
That's an interesting request.
Does the shirt work?
You don't need to drink?
Basic Asian people.
You failed.
Captain America frustrates you, doesn't it?
But it's okay.
Okay, Larry, if this shirt doesn't work,
maybe someday
they will make Captain Asia shirts.
John, the boss specifically asked our best agent
to find the lost alien.
Is this how you prepare it?
Are you crazy?
/ Give your base.
Yeah, you look cool now.
Perfect right?
You look like a Lion King.
Do you also need a hairdresser?
thanks.
Here's my chance
write my name in history.
I can't tell you now, right?
Go there.
100 days of recovery.
My little girl.
He can't perform for 100 days.
This place will really change
become a Hot Pot restaurant.
Hot Pot is better.
I will be a supplier of alcohol for you.
We will be strong partners.
Get away with you!
Get out there.
You are so stupid.
All you think about is this monkey.
You're right too!
There are always other ways.
If you don't obey,
you will accept this.
But if you obey,
you will get this.
This is called Pavlov Reflex.
(dog obedience)
You hurt my monkey.
Now you are my slave.
Open your eyes!
Watch this carefully.
/ Father is watching.
Here.
Come on
Here.
Do you hear no?
Come on
Look at me.
Watch me.
Here. Sin your hand.
Hold this one.
Hold on.
Your legs!
Yes.
Your hand! Nice.
Now walk slowly.
Not bad.
Pavlov, huh?
More like breaking up tofu.
Let's lift it.
Watch me
Slowly, lifted up like this.
Why are you looking at me?
Let's try again.
Did you see that, Huan-Huan?
What a shame.
I...
Let's lift it!
Do you hear no?
Lift now!
You can't watch it?
He makes you jealous, huh?
Let's lift it!
Now!
Nice.
Let's lift it.
Push. Come on
Nice.
{\ an9} broth3r max
Very diligent, Geng Hao!
Why are you installing barbed wire?
Do you want to fortify yourself?
/ Now he can walk using Enggrang.
If I don't put this up,
he can run away later.
Listen, monkey show
can't make you rich.
Why is that serious?
Let me show you how.
I just met this drink sales manager.
We are now close friends.
We can join as a city sales agent.
If you fund the remaining money I need,
I'll give you a part.
/ Indifferent.
I have invested in your civet coffee shop.
There is no dime.
You're not a forgiving type huh?
No need to always bring it up and down.
This one is different.
I'm telling you,
this alcohol will produce
abundant wealth for me.
I want French people, Parisians
start drinking this brand of alcohol
and be happy forever.
A dirty beetle sits at the computer
that doesn't mean he knows how to use a computer.
Your French knee.
Paris your head.
France and Paris are the same people, stupid.
I...
I don't know why we can be friends.
You have no education at all.
And also, about that,
French people drink red wine
not rubbish like that.
The alien must have run out of choices,
so he came to us.
But one thing we caught from this picture ...
No problem, that's enough.
Did you see that?
This is proof that he is still alive.
This leaf is from a plane tree aged 15 to 25 years.
Only this we can.
We can't show
the right location.
Only this way we can communicate with that.
Extraordinary. Well, at least
we can override Antarctica.
Sir, can I borrow your computer?
Certain.
Do we agree if the next step
maybe search globally for this type of structure?
Start work, colleagues.
SEARCH....
NOT SUITABLE
SUITABLE
MOUNTAIN JESUS, BRAZIL
The creature is in Rio.
God bless Amanika.
According to our intel,
the alien was hiding in the smuggler's ship.
Target identified!
We enter.
Approaching very carefully.
They are armed and dangerous.
Understand.
Why do you use heavy weaponry
to smuggle this?
Is this kind of rare,
Un-seen items?
This is a cross between Kobe cows
and Nelore cattle.
Shut up!
Dream bigger!
Huan-Huan, don't be naughty.
KAZAKHSTAN
What the hell?
Why are you shooting?
This should be a negotiation!
I don't know anything about aliens.
Why do you call me lying?
Then why are there pictures of aliens in Rasgard?
You liar.
You still call me a liar?
Every minute on the stage
is 10 years of training.
I ask you.
Am I an animal ruler or not?
You are not an animal ruler.
You are the master of the pimp
in the animal world.
/ Use this.
Push.
Advanced.
Geng Hao, if we become beverage sales agents,
You don't need to pay me.
Just give this monkey.
The price is at least $ 10,000.
Do not care.
Don't be jealous of this monkey.
If you join our training,
just be honest.
I'll whip. Cetar!
On your ass.
Maybe you can show time exploration.
I thought you were a pimp.
Travel time is better.
I can date your mother again.
EGYPT
Are these aliens sightseeing again?
What is this?
The director wants to hold the Hot Pot festival.
He told me to open the door.
This is the problem.
You have closed it for half a month,
the director found a way to help you.
You crazy.
Uncle, your wife said
most of our guests are family.
The adult eats Hot Pot
and children playing.
Your wife also said ...
Don't call me uncle.
In public call me Tony.
Director.
/ Geng Hao.
Oh, sorry.
/ No problem.
Oh yeah.
After you leave,
I can't let this place remain empty.
I told these people to come here
prepare it,
but they changed this hot pot festival
become a children's festival.
What a fool.
Do you not like it?
I'll show you something you like.
The routine that we have done.
Anyway, when you see it,
You only think about questions
raise KPI, continue to rise, rise.
Now I want to introduce
Next superstar
our entire park.
New friend.
Where is my monkey?
Your monkey is gone?
Maybe he flew on a bicycle?
An ancient person, once said.
People die for wealth.
Birds die for food.
Open it, honey.
I have to give applause.
This little phenix,
have a degree in financial management.
You're amazing ...
That is polite.
Where is my monkey?
/ Here I introduce someone.
This is Mr. Liu.
Friend,
he will give you $ 15,000 to buy the monkey.
You're an expert monkey.
Is the price right?
Certain.
Give me $ 15,000 and you can take him.
I made you what you are now.
That's right?
But where is your respect?
Give me back the monkey.
Scan this.
Don't pay attention to him, so I can handle it.
See these 2 people.
Hey you guys, never mind pretending acting.
We are all healthy.
What about hers ...
let me see the monkey first.
If the monkey is different
as you tell me,
I'll give you an additional $ 3,000.
Bro, sayings are not the same as mine.
You're smart!
After you see that monkey,
I guarantee
you will be amazed.
Like lightning in broad daylight.
Your ***!
I said it wasn't for sale.
Do you think this price isn't enough?
If the monkey is indeed rare
money doesn't matter.
Let's talk about it.
Understand?
You have a lot of money right?
Then why play birds?
Your toy must be an airplane!
Put it down!
Don't touch my chest!
Exit!
Give me back my bag!
This is crazy!
/ Exit!
Burungku is innocent.
Take off my gun.
Let go!
What are you doing?
Just play the show.
The behavior is like a monkey.
You two play on stage.
Get out.
/ Hey!
Where is my monkey?
Where is he?
This!
And your Parlov, blah ... blah ...
And the Goddess of the Beast.
You don't want to sell this monkey.
You don't want to sell liquor!
/ This is my business!
People don't watch monkey shows
since the dynasty first.
You foolish bottom still thinks it's valuable.
So what?
/ You're the rest of the trash from the past.
I'm trying to help you move forward,
but your fear.
/ You are uncivilized!
I'm telling you.
This is core livelihood.
You use trivial tricks that other people can, too.
do you call core income?
You consider yourself good at just because
I say good?
I tell you,
you're just a circus monkey artisan.
Pathetic monkey circus handyman!
Foolish! Stupid!
Oh do you think anyone can do this?
Come on
If everyone can, then show it.
Come on
If you can train him in a day,
I'll give it to you.
Come on Do it.
Come out.
I said come out!
Exit!
Well.
/ No problem.
Attention!
Sincerely,
Don't show off such tricks.
I've taught him all that.
That doesn't prove anything.
Show me something I don't know.
Alright, friend.
Watch me.
Let's push-ups.
Pay attention.
Go down.
Down!
Down.
Lift!
Yes! Down!
Did you see that?
You can use the trick for free.
Okay, friend, then.
Come on
Turn right. Move forward!
See?
Your hard work
nothing now, understand?
Good at it.
/ Tricks are so ...
Get the rope!
You can't chase him on foot.
Hey messenger!
Stop!
♪ I'm spring red onion ♪
Fast!
♪ Originating from outer space ♪
♪ If you dip me in soy sauce ♪
♪ I'll destroy your house ♪
♪ I'm a gust of wind ♪
Fast! Speed ​​fast!
♪ I come and go high speed ♪
♪ If you think of me as a dish ♪
♪ We will drink ♪
Hey messenger!
Stop!
Hey messenger!
/ Fast pedaling! Fast!
Train monkeys all day
but don't train yourself.
♪ I'm spring red onion ♪
HUANXI MEDIA GROUP LIMITED (BEIJING)
DIRTY MONKEY
ENLIGHT PICTURES
follow Instagram @ broth3rmax
BASED ON "VILLAGE TEACHER NOVEL" LIU CIXIN'S WORK
Hey idiot, I guess you're a silly selfie again.
Bro, this photo will freeze TikTok all day.
Never mind, yoga teacher.
Come on, you have to give the ball.
OK.
Hold your horse, cowboy.
Your genes on the way.
I already talked, guys.
The airlock room is open.
Focus on mission.
Gen balls have arrived in the preparation room.
Captain Andrews, get ready to accept.
Oh, my God.
Aren't you sexy
when I say the hatch door is open.
Transfer procedure starts.
I heard they chose girl's DNA
to put it in here.
Girl, oh ...
He must be a fox.
Maybe you can help me
get the telephone number.
Captain Andrews, please focus on the mission.
This is live feed for the Boss.
Start the exit procedure.
Personnel, please pay attention,
the exit procedure will start in 10 seconds.
I'm in position.
Gosh dragon ...
Well, that was close.
Which stupid jerk decides if we are
have to do this exchange in the middle of the satellite?
Captain Andrews, you really don't deserve to whine.
You only know how to get Rasdian
believe our story about satellite repair.
The next satellite will fly in 21 minutes 16 seconds.
Boss, I still think that giving
our genes on aliens are very dangerous.
Sir, it's even more dangerous if another country
seize this opportunity ahead of us.
Play an alien message again.
This is the message of the most advanced civilization in this galaxy.
We want to establish diplomatic relations.
with planet Earth.
Let's exchange DNA.
By inserting a DNA ball into your mouth.
Then return it to our messenger
to complete the exchange.
The genome that we gave it
comes from a Amanika bodybuilder
which has an IQ of 180.
Well you see, that's good.
That might be one of our genes.
Only we can represent the human race.
Your hand
We keep watching the vital signs of life.
Understood.
Did you bring my food to this thing?
Busy! Very beautiful.
I fall in love.
/ Captain Andrews, control your hormones,
please focus on the mission.
/ Fine.
Starting the transfer of ball genes.
Hi, I'm Captain Zack Andrews from
United States of America.
The most developed country on planet Earth.
On behalf of mankind,
I'm here to present our DNA to you.
I think he wants it back
the DNA ball.
Captain Andrews, keep following the protocol.
Before we begin this important ceremony,
please, tell me your name.
The task to communicate with you
that of that pervert planet
disgusts me.
I don't accept your protocol
for the exchange of identity.
Low form of life.
Well.
He has a sense of humor too.
He tried to joke.
What did he do?
This photo will disable TikTok for a week.
Ready? 1 ...
2 ... sexy!
No, no, no. Do not be afraid!
This is not a weapon.
No no no, don't close the door.
Honey, honey, don't be afraid.
This is not a weapon.
Pull back your sad technology.
Stop your actions,
or you will be eliminated.
Zack! You're on the satellite line!
Get away!
Watch out! Get away!
Get away!
translation of broth3 max
A
ALIEN
ALIEN GI
CRAZY ALIEN
A L I E N G I L A
Shake your hands every day.
The mind will remain clear.
This is called a different work line,
there are different unique aspects.
The Olympics has a winner.
The monkey show has "Monkey King"
Ladies and gentlemen,
guys and girls,
we have a lot of different guests here today.
I am flattered by your presence
on the stage of Mount Huaguo.
Without further length,
I present our star today.
Huan-Huan!
Let's get on stage!
He will show attraction to all of you.
Walk across the volcano.
Come on
Come on
Turn somersaults between clouds.
Come on
Monkey sweep kick stance.
Use iron engrang.
One iron stick shook the earth.
Two iron sticks pierced the sky.
Come on
Left, right, left, right, graceful movements.
Left, right, one more time!
Give applause.
Why is Miss Huan-Huan shy
hide in the bridal train?
When men and women are married.
But I want you to give a big round of applause
to welcome our bride Huan-Huan.
This is the most sacred moment
for the life of a girl.
Huan-Huan will pay homage to the audience.
I say respect, bow now.
Nice.
He also gave me this.
He wants to choose men from the audience,
and pair the ring.
Guess who is lucky?
This is fate.
It seems like he chose you!
Look, our bride can't wait anymore
waiting for the ceremony.
Let me ask,
Are you willing to marry this sweet girl?
Yea, whatever.
Hurry up.
/ Now I ask him.
Are you willing to marry this handsome man?
Yes, he is willing.
Extraordinary.
The bride has done symbolic ...
/ Shut up!
Hello? Yes, good,
2 girls, coming soon.
You don't want to finish the monkey show?
/ This circus artisan loser monkey is lousy.
Come on, hurry up, leave.
Bring my bag.
What a moving love story!
But the groom is still running away.
This seems to be my chance now.
Ladies and gentlemen,
second marriage is also worthy of your blessing.
The bride is mine now.
Come on, dear.
Let's sleep.
That's enough for today's show.
No need to interfere with my business.
Without my presence, your stage show
can be messy today.
Everything you eat.
What did that person call you?
Circus artisan loser monkey?
See right?
Your audience knows very well.
You're always circling.
You should step forward
this is your wallet.
How can you bring my wallet?
I intended to give you a chance
invest in my business.
But what have you done?
You changed the password based on a cunning bastard.
Who are you getting protection from?
Your father, me?
Where is the money in my wallet?
Money, everything is here, don't you see?
Turtles, snakes, wolves, this is your share in our business.
I help you.
Who invited you to join the drinks business.
But you never want to switch from your stupid monkey show.
Don't you see?
nobody wants to watch the show.
You see later.
In a few days
you just wait.
Are you alone?
Add problems only
but where is the payment?
No shame in my house you made a shop
selling liquor.
This is an investment name.
Listen, this is the future we are talking about.
I collaborated with your father
can make you rich.
/ Go there!
Don't be happy first, just pay attention.
This was inspired by a movie I watched
2 days ago.
The title ...
E ... T ... is that so?
Who is the director?
What's the burger burger like?
The creature was flying using a bicycle and naked.
After I repeat, I think
invited Huang-Huang to ride his bicycle
and we fly into the air.
Not only shows
monkey rides a bicycle at the start,
but we also have dragons who follow behind.
We only need to enlarge this miniature.
Do you know the CBD that you always told me about?
KPI.
/ Yes, it is true.
KPI.
This will make your KPI skyrocket.
This idea
when combined,
you only need $ 2000.
Geng Hao.
Come down there.
Come on
Do you see who is under your feet?
Money. / This pool produces
more money than you
and you want me to invest more?
/ Not me...
I told you
we will turn your stage into a Hot Pot restaurant.
There is only a Hot Pot restaurant in the area.
It produces more than it does
your monkey show.
Hot Pot?
The monkey show ...
But the monkey show is our core job.
Are Hot Pot not?
That's ... yeah too, but ...
/ Core work that produces profit.
Your silly monkey show
different things.
That...
I mean, Hot Pot and monkey shows ...
Don't talk to my core income,
you're just a circus artisan loser monkey.
Goddess of the Beast, my genius idea was rejected.
We make money with our own abilities,
but how can it be
just a mere cliche?
And also
as long as we are still breathing
we will not give up.
This Monkey show is inherited
hereditary.
How will I behave in the future
the ancestors if I stop?
But this is not important.
As long as I'm still here.
I will not let that happen.
My father used to be a monkey show.
And now,
I will not let them call me
circus artisan loser monkey.
That's right?
I'll get my pride.
Huan-Huan,
from now on we have to work hard.
"Southwestern Monkey King"
Huan-Huan?
Huan-Huan!
Don't move.
Are you ok?
Da Fei, wake up the blind massage massage.
I go there.
Busy! This is an alien.
You are more like an alien.
You stupid.
Then you know better,
then why come here?
What do you think this creature is?
Look carefully.
His eyes 2, his mouth 1.
Hands 2.
Legs 2.
From its characteristics,
You know this is a kind of primate.
This must be a rare type of monkey.
The primate is a monkey.
The monkey is of many kinds.
Look at this neck necklace.
Seems like this ... it's a person.
I didn't ask who took care of him,
what kind of monkey am I asking for?
What do you think this is ...
I think maybe this comes from Southern Amanika.
Possible from Congo.
The scientific name ...
The point
This must have seen Huan-Huan,
and want to marry her.
He fell from my roof.
Why don't you just say that?
This scientific name is
Congolese Estrus Monkey.
Da Fei,
I've treated your monkey.
He will wake up,
if the drug runs out.
Yes, for a moment.
What is this bandage for?
Broken bones.
How long can he recover?
100 days.
Geez.
How many days did you say?
/ 100 days.
Da Fei, close the door.
Before you leave.
Go to sleep, Doctor Liao.
He lives.
He is this
it seems like I'm in good health.
You are right.
Here I check.
Open your mouth.
Yes indeed, he is 3 years old.
Look, he's scared.
He looks weird.
He is indeed a Congolese Monkey.
Because of the hot weather in Congo,
so he doesn't have hair.
This is a rare type.
Not so bad.
He can stand up.
What?
What do you want?
Basic training.
Here, look.
Finger 4.
Not good if it's sold again.
Yea, and your cousin fingers 6.
Beware of being scratched.
He invites a fight.
Are you a fighter?
Stop it!
Stay there.
Watch out, he wants to act again.
Calm down, don't let him blister.
He wants to run away.
Stop him.
Do not run.
Stop!
Stop!
Want more?
Where are you goin?
Geng Hao, confront him!
Vodka is the hardest drink for me.
I once mixed it
in noodle soup for lunch.
This American Captain shirt gives me strength.
The power that drives me to stop drinking.
That's a bit inappropriate, John.
I'm sorry, please continue.
I really believe he got special powers
recover from being drunk from the shirt.
That's very inappropriate, Larry.
I can touch it,
but can't feel anything.
I feel like a super hero.
And as long as I use this Captain America shirt,
nothing can make me want
drink again.
I won't, even though there are people pointing at me
gun to my head.
That's an interesting request.
Does the shirt work?
You don't need to drink?
Basic Asian people.
You failed.
Captain America frustrates you, doesn't it?
But it's okay.
Okay, Larry, if this shirt doesn't work,
maybe someday
they will make Captain Asia shirts.
John, the boss specifically asked our best agent
to find the lost alien.
Is this how you prepare it?
Are you crazy?
/ Give your base.
Yeah, you look cool now.
Perfect right?
You look like a Lion King.
Do you also need a hairdresser?
thanks.
Here's my chance
write my name in history.
I can't tell you now, right?
Go there.
100 days of recovery.
My little girl.
He can't perform for 100 days.
This place will really change
become a Hot Pot restaurant.
Hot Pot is better.
I will be a supplier of alcohol for you.
We will be strong partners.
Get away with you!
Get out there.
You are so stupid.
All you think about is this monkey.
You're right too!
There are always other ways.
If you don't obey,
you will accept this.
But if you obey,
you will get this.
This is called Pavlov Reflex.
(dog obedience)
You hurt my monkey.
Now you are my slave.
Open your eyes!
Watch this carefully.
/ Father is watching.
Here.
Come on
Here.
Do you hear no?
Come on
Look at me.
Watch me.
Here. Sin your hand.
Hold this one.
Hold on.
Your legs!
Yes.
Your hand! Nice.
Now walk slowly.
Not bad.
Pavlov, huh?
More like breaking up tofu.
Let's lift it.
Watch me
Slowly, lifted up like this.
Why are you looking at me?
Let's try again.
Did you see that, Huan-Huan?
What a shame.
I...
Let's lift it!
Do you hear no?
Lift now!
You can't watch it?
He makes you jealous, huh?
Let's lift it!
Now!
Nice.
Let's lift it.
Push. Come on
Nice.
{\ an9} broth3r max
Very diligent, Geng Hao!
Why are you installing barbed wire?
Do you want to fortify yourself?
/ Now he can walk using Enggrang.
If I don't put this up,
he can run away later.
Listen, monkey show
can't make you rich.
Why is that serious?
Let me show you how.
I just met this drink sales manager.
We are now close friends.
We can join as a city sales agent.
If you fund the remaining money I need,
I'll give you a part.
/ Indifferent.
I have invested in your civet coffee shop.
There is no dime.
You're not a forgiving type huh?
No need to always bring it up and down.
This one is different.
I'm telling you,
this alcohol will produce
abundant wealth for me.
I want French people, Parisians
start drinking this brand of alcohol
and be happy forever.
A dirty beetle sits at the computer
that doesn't mean he knows how to use a computer.
Your French knee.
Paris your head.
France and Paris are the same people, stupid.
I...
I don't know why we can be friends.
You have no education at all.
And also, about that,
French people drink red wine
not rubbish like that.
The alien must have run out of choices,
so he came to us.
But one thing we caught from this picture ...
No problem, that's enough.
Did you see that?
This is proof that he is still alive.
This leaf is from a plane tree aged 15 to 25 years.
Only this we can.
We can't show
the right location.
Only this way we can communicate with that.
Extraordinary. Well, at least
we can override Antarctica.
Sir, can I borrow your computer?
Certain.
Do we agree if the next step
maybe search globally for this type of structure?
Start work, colleagues.
SEARCH....
NOT SUITABLE
SUITABLE
MOUNTAIN JESUS, BRAZIL
The creature is in Rio.
God bless Amanika.
According to our intel,
the alien was hiding in the smuggler's ship.
Target identified!
We enter.
Approaching very carefully.
They are armed and dangerous.
Understand.
Why do you use heavy weaponry
to smuggle this?
Is this kind of rare,
Un-seen items?
This is a cross between Kobe cows
and Nelore cattle.
Shut up!
Dream bigger!
Huan-Huan, don't be naughty.
KAZAKHSTAN
What the hell?
Why are you shooting?
This should be a negotiation!
I don't know anything about aliens.
Why do you call me lying?
Then why are there pictures of aliens in Rasgard?
You liar.
You still call me a liar?
Every minute on the stage
is 10 years of training.
I ask you.
Am I an animal ruler or not?
You are not an animal ruler.
You are the master of the pimp
in the animal world.
/ Use this.
Push.
Advanced.
Geng Hao, if we become beverage sales agents,
You don't need to pay me.
Just give this monkey.
The price is at least $ 10,000.
Do not care.
Don't be jealous of this monkey.
If you join our training,
just be honest.
I'll whip. Cetar!
On your ass.
Maybe you can show time exploration.
I thought you were a pimp.
Travel time is better.
I can date your mother again.
EGYPT
Are these aliens sightseeing again?
What is this?
The director wants to hold the Hot Pot festival.
He told me to open the door.
This is the problem.
You have closed it for half a month,
the director found a way to help you.
You crazy.
Uncle, your wife said
most of our guests are family.
The adult eats Hot Pot
and children playing.
Your wife also said ...
Don't call me uncle.
In public call me Tony.
Director.
/ Geng Hao.
Oh, sorry.
/ No problem.
Oh yeah.
After you leave,
I can't let this place remain empty.
I told these people to come here
prepare it,
but they changed this hot pot festival
become a children's festival.
What a fool.
Do you not like it?
I'll show you something you like.
The routine that we have done.
Anyway, when you see it,
You only think about questions
raise KPI, continue to rise, rise.
Now I want to introduce
Next superstar
our entire park.
New friend.
Where is my monkey?
Your monkey is gone?
Maybe he flew on a bicycle?
An ancient person, once said.
People die for wealth.
Birds die for food.
Open it, honey.
I have to give applause.
This little phenix,
have a degree in financial management.
You're amazing ...
That is polite.
Where is my monkey?
/ Here I introduce someone.
This is Mr. Liu.
Friend,
he will give you $ 15,000 to buy the monkey.
You're an expert monkey.
Is the price right?
Certain.
Give me $ 15,000 and you can take him.
I made you what you are now.
That's right?
But where is your respect?
Give me back the monkey.
Scan this.
Don't pay attention to him, so I can handle it.
See these 2 people.
Hey you guys, never mind pretending acting.
We are all healthy.
What about hers ...
let me see the monkey first.
If the monkey is different
as you tell me,
I'll give you an additional $ 3,000.
Bro, sayings are not the same as mine.
You're smart!
After you see that monkey,
I guarantee
you will be amazed.
Like lightning in broad daylight.
Your ***!
I said it wasn't for sale.
Do you think this price isn't enough?
If the monkey is indeed rare
money doesn't matter.
Let's talk about it.
Understand?
You have a lot of money right?
Then why play birds?
Your toy must be an airplane!
Put it down!
Don't touch my chest!
Exit!
Give me back my bag!
This is crazy!
/ Exit!
Burungku is innocent.
Take off my gun.
Let go!
What are you doing?
Just play the show.
The behavior is like a monkey.
You two play on stage.
Get out.
/ Hey!
Where is my monkey?
Where is he?
This!
And your Parlov, blah ... blah ...
And the Goddess of the Beast.
You don't want to sell this monkey.
You don't want to sell liquor!
/ This is my business!
People don't watch monkey shows
since the dynasty first.
You foolish bottom still thinks it's valuable.
So what?
/ You're the rest of the trash from the past.
I'm trying to help you move forward,
but your fear.
/ You are uncivilized!
I'm telling you.
This is core livelihood.
You use trivial tricks that other people can, too.
do you call core income?
You consider yourself good at just because
I say good?
I tell you,
you're just a circus monkey artisan.
Pathetic monkey circus handyman!
Foolish! Stupid!
Oh do you think anyone can do this?
Come on
If everyone can, then show it.
Come on
If you can train him in a day,
I'll give it to you.
Come on Do it.
Come out.
I said come out!
Exit!
Well.
/ No problem.
Attention!
Sincerely,
Don't show off such tricks.
I've taught him all that.
That doesn't prove anything.
Show me something I don't know.
Alright, friend.
Watch me.
Let's push-ups.
Pay attention.
Go down.
Down!
Down.
Lift!
Yes! Down!
Did you see that?
You can use the trick for free.
Okay, friend, then.
Come on
Turn right. Move forward!
See?
Your hard work
nothing now, understand?
Good at it.
/ Tricks are so ...
Get the rope!
You can't chase him on foot.
Hey messenger!
Stop!
♪ I'm spring red onion ♪
Fast!
♪ Originating from outer space ♪
♪ If you dip me in soy sauce ♪
♪ I'll destroy your house ♪
♪ I'm a gust of wind ♪
Fast! Speed ​​fast!
♪ I come and go high speed ♪
♪ If you think of me as a dish ♪
♪ We will drink ♪
Hey messenger!
Stop!
Hey messenger!
/ Fast pedaling! Fast!
Train monkeys all day
but don't train yourself.
♪ I'm spring red onion ♪