County Hospital (1932) - full transcript
In the hospital with a broken leg Ollie is visited by Stan, who brings him hard-boiled eggs, nuts, and total mayhem.
(Engine chugging noisily)
(Bangs)
(Bangs)
This way? Thank you.
- What can l do for you?
- l'd like to see Mr Hardy.
Oliver Norville Hardy.
Room 1 4. Next to the solarium.
Thank you, Doctor.
Did you wish to see someone?
- l want to see Mr Hardy.
- Oh, he's in room 1 4 on the top floor.
Phew!
Could you tell me
where room 1 4 is, please?
Right down to the end of the hall.
ls that the room next to the aquarium?
Aquarium?
Oh, you mean the solarium!
(Stan whistles)
(Knocking)
Come in.
How do you feel?
Fine. l didn't expect to see you here today.
Well, l didn't have anything else to do,
so l thought l'd drop in and see you.
Thank you!
You're welcome.
What have you got there?
l brought you some hard-boiled eggs
and some nuts.
Now, you know l can't eat
hard-boiled eggs and nuts.
lf you wanted to bring something,
why not bring a box of candy?
They cost too much.
What has that got to do with it?
You didn't pay me
for the last box l brought you.
- Have one?
- No. l'd rather not.
Hard-boiled eggs and nuts!
Hmm!
(Clang)
Don't put your hand in there,
l have to drink that water!
(Clang)
Ah!
Good morning,
good morning, good morning!
And how is my little patient today?
Just fine, thank you, Doctor.
This is my friend Mr Laurel.
l hope l find you well.
Thank you, ma'am.
See...
Miss Smith,
give this to the patient in room 22.
Yes, ma'am.
How long do you think l'll be in here?
(Doctor) Oh, at least a couple of months.
(Ollie) Gee, that's great. This is
the first time l've had such a wonderful rest.
- (Crack)
- Ooh! Ow!
(Groaning)
Put that down!
(Yells)
Oh! Oh! Get me...
Get me down! Oh! Oh!
Help! Get me down! Oh!
Oh, my leg! Aah! Oh!
(Ollie) Oh-ho-ho-ho!
Oh, my leg! Oh!
Oh, my... Oh, my leg! Get me down!
Oh!
Hey! Hey, do something to help me!
- (Yells)
- Aah! Get me down!
Oh, my leg! Oh!
(Ollie, yelling) Don't let go! Look out, hold it!
Oh-ho! Oh!
Aaah!
Oh-ho! Get me...!
Oh!
Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!
Oh! Hey, do something to help!
Aaah!
Aah! Ow!
(Ollie) Don't let go! Don't let go!
Oh, no!
Oh!
Oh! Ooh!
Put that there.
Look what you've done!
Why, Doctor!
You may go. Get out of here!
Most embarrassing!
As for you, get your clothes on and get out
of here at once! Do you understand?
(Door slams)
You had nothing else to do,
so you thought
you'd come around and see me.
Here l was for the first time in my life,
having a nice, peaceful time,
and you had to come and spoil it.
Get my clothes.
Mm-hm!
Hard-boiled eggs and nuts!
Hmm!
(Crash)
- (Clang)
- Oh-ho!
You know you can't get them over that foot!
Get the scissors and cut the leg off.
The leg of the pants!
Oh!
Get me the scissors.
Hind to front.
(Laughing)
Congratulate me, Hardy, old thing.
The doctor says l may go home.
That's great. l'm going home too.
How perfectly ripping!
Oh-ho-ho! Give me those scissors!
Oh!
l'm all a-flutter.
- Hardy, old bean, what do you think?
- What?
l have on your trousers by mistake.
Oh, l say!
Excuse me.
Oh... (Laughs)
Miss Wallace, will you refill this, please?
The visitor in room 1 4 sat on it.
He'll sleep for a month.
Wait a minute. l'll drive.
Wait a minute. l'll stay right here.
Well, well? Come on, let's get going.
(Horns blaring)
Aaah!
Just there...!
Oh! Why don't you watch that...!
Mind that one.
Aah! Oh! Oh-oh!
Keep on that side. Look thataway!
Brake!
Turn around there.
- (Horn blaring)
- Look where you're going!
Aaah! No!
(Yelling)
Aaah!
(Bell ringing)
Oh!
Hey!
(Bell ringing)
(Crash)
Get that car out of here!
Get that thing out of here
and pull over there. l wanna talk to you!
Pull over there!
(Bangs)
(Bangs)
This way? Thank you.
- What can l do for you?
- l'd like to see Mr Hardy.
Oliver Norville Hardy.
Room 1 4. Next to the solarium.
Thank you, Doctor.
Did you wish to see someone?
- l want to see Mr Hardy.
- Oh, he's in room 1 4 on the top floor.
Phew!
Could you tell me
where room 1 4 is, please?
Right down to the end of the hall.
ls that the room next to the aquarium?
Aquarium?
Oh, you mean the solarium!
(Stan whistles)
(Knocking)
Come in.
How do you feel?
Fine. l didn't expect to see you here today.
Well, l didn't have anything else to do,
so l thought l'd drop in and see you.
Thank you!
You're welcome.
What have you got there?
l brought you some hard-boiled eggs
and some nuts.
Now, you know l can't eat
hard-boiled eggs and nuts.
lf you wanted to bring something,
why not bring a box of candy?
They cost too much.
What has that got to do with it?
You didn't pay me
for the last box l brought you.
- Have one?
- No. l'd rather not.
Hard-boiled eggs and nuts!
Hmm!
(Clang)
Don't put your hand in there,
l have to drink that water!
(Clang)
Ah!
Good morning,
good morning, good morning!
And how is my little patient today?
Just fine, thank you, Doctor.
This is my friend Mr Laurel.
l hope l find you well.
Thank you, ma'am.
See...
Miss Smith,
give this to the patient in room 22.
Yes, ma'am.
How long do you think l'll be in here?
(Doctor) Oh, at least a couple of months.
(Ollie) Gee, that's great. This is
the first time l've had such a wonderful rest.
- (Crack)
- Ooh! Ow!
(Groaning)
Put that down!
(Yells)
Oh! Oh! Get me...
Get me down! Oh! Oh!
Help! Get me down! Oh!
Oh, my leg! Aah! Oh!
(Ollie) Oh-ho-ho-ho!
Oh, my leg! Oh!
Oh, my... Oh, my leg! Get me down!
Oh!
Hey! Hey, do something to help me!
- (Yells)
- Aah! Get me down!
Oh, my leg! Oh!
(Ollie, yelling) Don't let go! Look out, hold it!
Oh-ho! Oh!
Aaah!
Oh-ho! Get me...!
Oh!
Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!
Oh! Hey, do something to help!
Aaah!
Aah! Ow!
(Ollie) Don't let go! Don't let go!
Oh, no!
Oh!
Oh! Ooh!
Put that there.
Look what you've done!
Why, Doctor!
You may go. Get out of here!
Most embarrassing!
As for you, get your clothes on and get out
of here at once! Do you understand?
(Door slams)
You had nothing else to do,
so you thought
you'd come around and see me.
Here l was for the first time in my life,
having a nice, peaceful time,
and you had to come and spoil it.
Get my clothes.
Mm-hm!
Hard-boiled eggs and nuts!
Hmm!
(Crash)
- (Clang)
- Oh-ho!
You know you can't get them over that foot!
Get the scissors and cut the leg off.
The leg of the pants!
Oh!
Get me the scissors.
Hind to front.
(Laughing)
Congratulate me, Hardy, old thing.
The doctor says l may go home.
That's great. l'm going home too.
How perfectly ripping!
Oh-ho-ho! Give me those scissors!
Oh!
l'm all a-flutter.
- Hardy, old bean, what do you think?
- What?
l have on your trousers by mistake.
Oh, l say!
Excuse me.
Oh... (Laughs)
Miss Wallace, will you refill this, please?
The visitor in room 1 4 sat on it.
He'll sleep for a month.
Wait a minute. l'll drive.
Wait a minute. l'll stay right here.
Well, well? Come on, let's get going.
(Horns blaring)
Aaah!
Just there...!
Oh! Why don't you watch that...!
Mind that one.
Aah! Oh! Oh-oh!
Keep on that side. Look thataway!
Brake!
Turn around there.
- (Horn blaring)
- Look where you're going!
Aaah! No!
(Yelling)
Aaah!
(Bell ringing)
Oh!
Hey!
(Bell ringing)
(Crash)
Get that car out of here!
Get that thing out of here
and pull over there. l wanna talk to you!
Pull over there!