Cannibal Girls (1973) - full transcript
A young couple spend the night in an old farmhouse owned by a reverend, only to find out that it is also lived in by beautiful women who hunger after human flesh.
(quiet suspenseful music)
(screaming)
(eerie music)
- Well you got her, eh Reverend?
She's a looker alright.
That boy.
Ah, her boyfriend.
Ah, well I have the doc here
to take care of it anyway.
Alright.
Well we have another one, doc.
(ominous music)
- Cliff, where exactly are we anyway?
- [Cliff] I don't know!
I think we're on a side road somewhere.
- Could you be a little bit more specific?
- [Cliff] Gloria, I've
been driving all day
without stopping.
Now I've stopped and I'm, uh, busy.
Why don't you study the map?
- Well I am.
It seems like we're in
the middle of nowhere.
Cliff, are you sure you
know where we're going?
- [Cliff] Gloria, we picked
out a nice small town
where it's quiet, we're
gonna have a peaceful,
pleasant vacation, leave it to me.
- Okay.
Wow, it sure is beautiful here.
Oh Cliff, can you smell those evergreens?
- [Cliff] Yeah, standing right beside one.
- Wow, it's so quiet.
Hello.
Oooh-oooh.
Oooh-oooh.
Cliff!
Cliff, I think it's about time we go now.
Cliff?
Come on, Cliff.
Cliff, I'm not coming in there after you.
Okay, stop playing games.
Cliff?
Cliff?
Oh come on, I'm cold and I wanna go.
Cliff?
Cliff?
Oh Cliff, where are you?
Cliff?
(yells)
(screams)
Oh my God!
- (mumbling)
- Cliff!
Oh you are so sick!
- Oh Gloria, I just jumped out
from behind the tree there.
- Oh Cliff, I don't find
your joke very amusing.
- It was funny, you didn't
think it was, you okay?
Gloria, your heart's
going a mile a minute.
- See?
- I'm sorry.
Gloria, you know I wouldn't
do anything to hurt you.
- I've been calling you for 15 minutes,
I don't think you're very funny.
Oh Cliff, where are we going anyway?
I can't understand this map, gosh.
- I don't know, Gloria.
Now, we're going to Farning,
no no no Farnhamville.
- That's right, Farnhamville
the friendly city.
So how much further do we have to go?
- 10, 15 miles.
(engine trying to start)
- What's the matter?
- Nothing.
- Maybe there's not
enough air in the tires.
(engine trying to start)
Cliff, you're gonna flood it.
- I'm not gonna flood it, Gloria.
You have to give the gas enough
time to come out through the
carburetor, that's all.
We're gonna have to wait a while.
- That's okay.
(psychedelic rock music)
(turns radio off)
(engine trying to start)
- Needs air.
When I tell you, start the car, okay?
- Okay.
(engine trying to start)
- Not now, when I give you the signal!
(mysterious music)
Okay, try it now.
(honks)
(slams)
Not the horn, the ignition, Gloria!
- Huh?
- The key, turn on the key.
Try it now.
(engine trying to start)
That's it.
That's it, you got it.
- Come on, baby.
- Come on, baby!
- Come on baby!
- [Cliff] That's it,
that's it, you got it.
- You can do it come on, come on.
- You got it!
(engine revving)
Farnhamville, here we come.
Damnit.
- Now that's nice.
You think that we're gonna go anywhere
when you talk like that?
Cliff, the car understands.
You have to be nice to it.
Now wait a minute.
Now I know it's been hard on you,
it's very cold outside, and
I know that you'd rather
just be sitting someplace,
but if you could help us out
just this once, we'd really appreciate it.
- Gloria, please.
- Go ahead, talk like that.
Don't be sarcastic!
- I wasn't sarcastic, wasn't sarcastic,
wasn't sarcastic, car, wasn't sarcastic.
- Go ahead.
- It's gonna start, eh?
- Go ahead.
We love you.
- Love you, love you.
(engine starts)
- [Gloria] God bless you, car.
- [Cliff] Gloria, you
shoulda been a mechanic.
- Just wanna see if there's
a place to stay around here.
- Okay, I'm gonna see if
there are any postcards.
Hi, postcards inside?
- Hey, you seen this girl around?
- No, who is she?
- My sister.
She's been missing for six months.
- Yeah?
- How 'bout you, you seen her?
- I wouldn't know, I'm
just passing through.
Pretty.
- Yeah.
Well, if you see her around,
I'll be in town, okay?
- Yeah, right.
- Okay, thanks a lot.
- Take it easy.
Yes sir.
- I wanted to know if you could tell me
if there's a place to stay
around here, motel or something.
Just drove up with a broad,
wanna spend the weekend.
- Um, yeah, there's a nice
place, Mrs. Wainwright's
about a thousand yards
down the road there.
It's pretty nice.
Quiet.
- Yeah, cheap?
- Yeah, reasonable, it's not too bad.
- Okay, great.
Thanks a lot.
- Okay, take it easy.
- You know you shouldn't
play with that thing,
you might hurt yourself.
- Hiya Chief.
- What did that first guy want?
- He's checking up on one
of the Reverend's girls.
- The Reverend wouldn't be too
happy about that, would he?
- No.
- Well, I guess we'd better
take care of him, eh?
Hey Mose.
- Why don't you follow me and
we'll register in the office?
It's so nice to have
you young people visit.
We hardly get anyone around here anymore.
- But I don't understand,
it's so beautiful here.
- Yes, but it hasn't always been this way.
I guess all the folks are scared
off because of the legend.
- Legend?
- What legend is that, Mrs. Wainwright?
- Oh, it's the legend
about the three girls.
I guess it all started when
these three beautiful girls
began luring men to their farmhouse.
(intense music)
- Good morning.
Come on.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Haven't seen you here before.
- I don't drink much in bars.
- Are you alone?
- Oh, um--
- Can I join you?
- Do you want, yeah, sure, wanna sit down?
- Thank you.
- Is that a little too
close, maybe I can--
- No, no.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- You must be new around here.
- Yeah I'm actually just
sorta passing through town.
- Oh, that's too bad.
- It is?
- Well it's just that I share
a farm with two girlfriends
just outside of town.
- Oh, really?
I'm very interested in farming.
Dairy farming mostly, as a matter of fact.
Sort of in the dairy biz.
- Well it's too bad that
you're just passing through
'cause I thought we could get together,
you could spend a few days up at the farm
and have a really good time.
- I'd like that.
Actually I'm really just
on my vacation and I could
spend some time.
Wouldn't your girlfriends mind?
- Oh no, they wouldn't mind at all.
In fact, they'd really love it.
- Fill it up, sir?
- No, it's okay, I don't need any gas.
Listen, I'm in a bit of a hurry.
Could you tell me how
far it is to Buttonville?
- Yeah, it's about 40 miles
straight down this road here.
- 40 miles, eh?
- Yeah, there is a shortcut though.
- Oh?
- Yeah about three miles down here--
- Yeah?
- There's a dirt road
on the right hand side.
It'll cut your time in half
but it's pretty hard on your car.
- Oh don't worry about that, it's rented.
Listen, thank you very
much, that's terrific.
(mysterious music)
(intense music)
(eerie music)
- Clarissa, can I have
some more meat, please?
Clarissa.
- In a minute.
- All we ever do around
here is cook and eat.
Clarissa, can I please
have some more meat.
- Just a minute.
If I don't cut it properly,
it won't cook well.
- I don't care how you cut
it, all I want is about
three more pieces.
- What's going on here?
- Clarissa won't give me any more meat.
- Clarissa?
- If the meat isn't cut well
against the grain it won't be--
- It's fine the way it is.
He's very nice.
He'll fit in just fine.
- [Felix] Hi Earl.
- Hi Felix.
It's your roll, your roll, ready to go.
- It was my roll before breakfast.
- Sure, it's always your roll.
I own everything, you roll, I'll look on.
- Okay.
- 11.
- 11.
- Boardwalk.
- I'm on Boardwalk.
- 2,000.
- I just got eight dollars left.
- I'll take it.
- Was that the end of the game?
- Yes, I win again.
- I lose the game?
- Yes, you lose, I win.
- Rick.
- Hi, Felix Cranston.
- Hi Felix.
- Nice to meet you.
This is Earl.
- Hi.
- Hi, roll the dice.
- You guys live here?
- No, no.
- Well what are you doing here?
- Just taking it easy.
Kinda waiting around, you know.
- I gotta be out of here at 4:30.
- Where you going?
- Buttonville, I got a parade.
- What are you gonna be?
- I run the parade.
- Oh you mean you're like the
grand marshal kind of thing?
- No, I run parades, that's my job.
- [Felix] Organize?
- Yeah, it's Rick Parades
Enterprises Incorporated,
that's me.
- Almost as good as what you do?
- What do you do?
- I'm in the ice cream business.
- He's president of truck 12.
- Okay Earl, that's
enough with the jokes, eh?
I got a route, you know, driving a truck.
- What about you?
- Me?
I'm rich.
- Broads.
You're here, two of us, three.
- Yeah yeah, that's right.
- Earl?
- Finally, one for you, one for you.
- Those broads?
(laughing)
- We've been waiting all
the time for a third guy.
- That's what we've been waiting for.
- That's right, you can't leave now.
- Oh, forget the parade.
- You'll blow it for all of us.
- I gotta be in Buttonville.
- We can score.
- I haven't missed a
parade in eight years.
- [Earl] Have you ever
had this good of a reason?
- In case you hadn't
noticed, I decided to stay.
- Yes, it's rather nice to
have a man around the house.
- I notice you keep wearing
the same kind of things,
you girls.
You sisters?
- No, we share a lot of similar tastes.
- Fiona.
- Yes, Felix?
- You know yesterday
when we went for a walk
and you kinda said
you'd show me the house.
- Oh I will, I will, just be patient.
- I've been here for three days.
- Felix, you know we
can't make love tonight.
- Yeah but I thought just
maybe a little heavy petting.
- Felix.
- So he landed on Boardwalk,
had to pay me $2200,
and I won my seventh game in a row.
Clarissa, it was a terrific super, I mean,
I really enjoyed every bite of it.
I ate everything, just marvelous.
- Food can be a marvelous appetizer.
- I'm looking forward to
the main course myself.
Now?
Before dessert?
(mysterious music)
- It's alright, come on.
In me and without me, I honor the blood
which gives me life.
(screams)
- You know Fiona, it was really worth
waiting the three days.
- Oh, Felix.
I think you better go to your room now.
- Do I have to?
- Everyone will be getting up.
- I know.
Okay.
One last kiss?
- Alright.
Go on.
- Okay.
Fiona.
Fiona, what are you doing, no, no, no.
Don't!
- Good morning, Rick.
- Hiya.
Have you seen Anthea around?
- No.
- Know where she might be?
- No.
- Guess I'll look for her myself, then.
Morning, Bunker.
(growls)
(humming)
(laughing)
- You really gotta see one of my parades,
they're fantastic.
We got clowns and
kangaroos and roly-polys.
You know what's really strange?
Earl and Felix left and they
didn't even say goodbye.
And Earl forgot his Monopoly set.
- Listen, do you wanna talk about them,
or do you wanna be with me?
- [Voiceover] Within me and without me,
I honor this blood which gives me life.
(rooster crowing)
(rattling)
(ominous music)
(screaming)
- So that's the story of the three girls.
They were cannibals, and they ate men.
And rumor has it that they were
never sick a day in their lives.
- Really?
- Is this place still around?
- The house is still standing,
and it's a restaurant now.
They say the food is very good.
And if you like I can
take you there for supper.
- [Cliff] We're not gonna
see any cannibals up there,
are we?
- Oh no, that happened a long time ago.
I'm sure you'll love the restaurant.
I'll meet you around 5,
after you've settled in.
- Cliffy.
- Mm-hmm?
- Have you been to a motel
room with lots of women before?
- No, you're the first one.
- Oh, am I, Cliff?
- Mm-hmm.
Gloria?
- Yeah?
- I think I'm gonna take my coat off.
- Oh no, you don't have to, Cliff.
- No, I want to.
- Alright.
Oh no, Cliff, there's not
a television in our room.
- What do you need a TV
for when you've got me?
You know what we're gonna do?
- What?
- This afternoon we're gonna
take the car in to get fixed,
we're gonna pick up some wine, and then.
- Oh, Cliff, do you know
what I want you to do
more than anything right now?
- What's that?
- Play your guitar.
- Play my guitar?
- Yeah, you're my favorite musician.
- Right now?
Okay.
Okay, I'm gonna play an English ballad.
- Yeah.
- And this is a song about you.
- Did you write it?
- No.
- Oh, is that what English ballad means?
Yeah.
Oh Cliff.
♫ Early one morning ♫
Cliff?
You like me?
- Of course.
♫ Early one morning
♫ One morning in spring
♫ To hear the birds whistle
♫ The nightingale sing
♫ I met a fair maiden
♫ Who sweetly did sing
♫ I'm going to be married
♫ On ♫
Gloria?
Gloria?
I'm gonna take the car
in to get fixed, okay?
I'll be back in a couple of minutes.
- Okay.
- Okay, rest easy.
Here.
(hitting and grunting)
- Big mother, eh?
- Yeah.
- What are we gonna do with him?
- I dunno.
Maybe we better check it
out with the Chief, huh?
Yeah.
Anyways, that'll teach this
guy from snooping around.
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, there's something wrong in there.
It was rattling or knocking.
- Sounds like the carburetor.
Well, leave it here.
- Okay, pick it up tomorrow.
- Okay.
(mysterious music)
- Sam.
Now try and remember.
Did anybody hear a scream
or see any kind of a scuffle
going on?
- No sir.
- No think carefully.
- Did anybody see this
man come into the alley?
- No.
- Well, he's as dead as they come.
- Sure is.
- Of course, we can check all
of this down at headquarters
and if there's any witnesses, well,
they'll be taken care of.
But I think everything'll be okay.
Sam, I want you to do me a favor, alright?
I want you to take this
body down to my wife.
She'll know what to do with it, okay?
- Okay.
- Well good afternoon, Mrs. Wilson.
Can I help you with something?
- I'm looking for a
really good cut of meat.
- Ah, someone special for dinner.
- Why yes.
- What do I just have,
yes, this just came in
this morning.
- Is it really fresh?
- Mrs. Wilson, if it was any fresher,
it would get up and tell you itself.
- You'll really enjoy the restaurant.
It has a flavor all its own.
- Is it very expensive?
- The restaurant is run by
a very engaging young man,
I'm sure you'll get along splendidly.
All the folks from around here eat there,
it's become a real tourist attraction.
But you shouldn't have any problem.
Now you see that path over there?
Just follow it and make
sure you don't miss the bend
just past the big tree, a
little bit to the right,
and then just keep on walking
until you see the house.
- Thanks.
- Bye bye.
- Thanks for everything, Mrs. Wainwright.
- Bye bye, have a good
time, I'll see you later.
Eat well.
- There's something
strange about this road.
- Yeah, smells of manure.
- Did you ever live on a farm?
- Gloria, you don't have to be a farmer
to know manure when you smell it.
- I thought it was your coat.
- It is my coat.
- Oh, cool it.
(knocking)
Oh Cliff, I'm cold, let's go in.
This must be the place.
- Yeah.
Wow.
- I don't see anybody else here.
This doesn't even look--
- Good evening.
I'm the Reverend Alex St. John.
You are?
- Oh, I'm sorry, we have the
wrong place, we're here for--
- For dinner, yes, of course my dear.
- Cliff Sturgess.
- How do you do?
- Hi, fine.
- My dear.
- Gloria Wellaby.
- Gloria.
Enchanted.
- Thank you.
- Won't you come in?
- Sure.
I thought we would need reservations.
- Reservations, no.
May I take your coat?
- Sure.
- Lovely furs.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
- We don't really seem to
be dressed for the occasion,
seems very formal.
- Any way you are dressed is
perfectly delightful, my dear.
Will you sit down?
- Right.
- [Reverend] You will excuse me?
- Yes.
- Cliff, what kind of a place is this?
- Freaky.
- You're not kidding.
- Very theatrical.
- Wow.
- You know something?
- Yeah.
- I've seen that man before.
- No, no, no, I'm sorry.
No smoking allowed, it's one
of the rules of the house.
- Just a few puffs?
- Ah ah ah ah.
Smoking's bad for the
circulation of the blood.
- I didn't know that.
- Well actually that's a
very good rule to observe.
The house seems very old.
- Old.
Yes indeed, my dear.
House is very old.
We have a few moments before dinner.
May I show you around?
- That'd be really fun, yeah.
- Come, in here, my father's library.
He died with a book in his hand.
And in here, the study.
Now this is the (mumbles).
Have you heard of him?
The young lad was later
suspected of having stuffed
his mother-in-law into
an old rolltop desk.
She was a dreadful woman,
she was the chief carrier
of a particular social
disease found in this part
of the country.
- [Gloria] Oh Cliff, look.
- [Reverend] This is
my grandfather's piano.
He was a man of rare taste and gusto,
a musical genius.
Sometimes still, you know,
in the dead of evening,
religious hymns seem to fill this room.
- [Cliff] That's amazing, Rev.
- [Reverend] Do you know just
the other day I thought I saw
my distant cousin Rex?
It's rumored that he liked men,
sometimes exceedingly well.
Ah well, he did produce
some very fine children,
but to be honest none of them
resemble him in the slightest.
Clifford, I think you'll be
interested in this sword.
Now it was owned by a French executioner,
and legend has it that
just as he was about to
decapitate an innocent man,
it slipped out of his hand
and cut off his own head.
- [Gloria] How horrible!
- [Reverend] Oh, this
things happen, my dear.
Now this fine set of
silver was supposedly owned
by the Duchess of Milan.
Do you know she one night
poisoned a whole dinner party
just because she forgot--
- [Gloria] Eew.
- [Reverend] I'm sorry my dear,
I forgot we were just about
to sit down to dinner.
And this ugly assortment
belonged to the three
previous occupants of this
house, they were three
perverted, awful young ladies.
I suppose I should take them down,
but there's a frightful
curse hanging over them,
and I confess I am a
little bit superstitious.
Mrs. Wainwright always
sends such charming guests.
- Thank you.
Cliff, Cliff?
Do you see anything on
here that you might like?
- There's only one item on the menu.
- Yes Clifford, I think
you'll enjoy what we
have prepared for you.
- Well we'll have two.
- Two.
May I join you?
(ominous music)
Thank you, my dear.
Mmm, 1913 was a beautiful year.
We grow the grapes
ourselves, our own vineyards.
They grow on my grandfather's grave.
I don't know, there's
something about human remains
that add a certain earthy quality to wine.
To Grandfather.
- Grandfather.
- I notice a certain intimacy between you.
You've not been together long?
- [Gloria] A month.
- Two weeks.
- Clifford, a month.
- I understand, I understand.
And tell me, Clifford, what do you do?
- I play music.
- [Reverend] Music, what kind of music
do you play, Clifford?
- Rock.
- Rock, have you seen my--
- Rock, I'm a rock musician.
- You know Reverend,
like the Rolling Stones?
- I'm an ax picker.
- An ax picker.
Clifford, you're a man after my own heart.
Are you enjoying dinner?
- It's delicious.
- It's wet.
- May I entertain you
with stories of the house?
- We'd just as soon eat, Reverend.
- I think it'd be lovely, Reverend.
- Very droll Clifford, very droll.
Are you familiar with
the legend of the house?
- About the three cannibals?
Mrs. Wainwright told us about it.
- Ah, then you'll be interested to know
that this is the very
table at which the victims
ate their last dinner on earth.
(scream)
(intense music)
- Clifford, let's go.
(crying out)
- Let's go.
Ah, change, change.
- What for?
- For a tip.
You know, those tapestries
hang really well from this
side of the room.
- Yes they do.
- They do.
- My dear.
Clifford is this yours?
- No, it's ours, actually,
we just put it down
to see if we had enough money.
- Please, please, please, please, please.
Dinner is my pleasure and my treat.
I owe you an explanation for the scream.
There's a maniac at large,
and one of the girls
thought she saw him peering
in the kitchen window.
- Oh no, she was mistaken.
- I don't think.
I'm ruining your dinner.
Let's have dessert.
(rings bell)
I think you'll enjoy this.
- This is a lovely dinner, dear.
The food is terrific.
You really outdid yourself.
- I did save the best parts for you.
(organ music)
(clinks glass)
- I'd like to propose a
toast to the Reverend.
Our guiding spirit.
- [All] To the Reverend.
(laughing)
- Music be the fruit of life, play on.
- Ah, Shakespeare.
Are you familiar with this one, Clifford?
It is the time of night
when graves have yawned
and yielded up their
dead, and yonder shines
aurora's harbinger, whose approach ghosts,
wandering here and there,
true comb the churchyards.
Damned spirits all that
in crossways and floods
have burial already to
their wormy beds are gone.
Fear less day should
look their shames upon
they willfully themselves
exile from light,
and must for I consort
with black browed night.
- Sounds very familiar.
♫ When the morning waken
♫ Then may we arise
♫ Pure and fresh and sinless
♫ In thy holy eyes
♫ Ooh ♫
(clapping)
- Very good, it's very good.
- To the ladies.
- To the ladies!
I am a lady.
- Well kid, wanna hit the road?
- Okay, let me finish this.
- Why don't you stay here the night?
- No we can't, Reverend,
we have to get back.
- Please I have an old bed upstairs,
it's ancient but it's comfortable.
- Well I think we've
overstayed our welcome.
- As you wish.
Coats.
Clifford.
If you must go home, will
you promise me one thing?
As you're walking through the woods,
if you hear any noise, will
you run as fast as you can?
Promise me that.
And Clifford.
Don't look back.
Well then.
Oh.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Goodnight Clifford,
thank you for coming.
Gloria.
Come, I'll show you to the door.
(eerie music)
(thunder rumbling)
- I think maybe we
should stay here tonight.
- Yeah.
Hi Reverend.
Reverend, we've changed our mind.
- Well that's fine, just fine.
I'm sure you'll enjoy the
room we have prepared.
Come in, this will be your room tonight.
It belonged to my Aunt
Priscilla, she died, poor thing,
burned at the stake.
Oh well, your bedclothes are
on the cupboard behind you,
have a very nice sleep.
- Thank you very much, Reverend.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight, Priscilla.
- What will you have
for dinner my lovelies,
what will you have?
Not the fingers my dear,
not the fingers, no.
How about muscles?
The arms?
Deep red meat of the arms?
What will you have, my dear?
The calves?
The rich, red, meaty calves?
And my queen, for you the
soft white meat of the thighs.
The rich, soft thighs.
My darlings, we shall
drink the blood of life,
the blood of life eternal,
and we shall live forever,
forever, you my queens, and I your king.
(dog barking)
- Oh Cliff.
I think we shouldn't.
Cliff.
- Mm-hmm?
- Could you take off your glasses?
- Oh, sure.
(tapping)
- Oh my God.
- I'm sorry, I've disturbed you.
Please don't worry about
any noises in the night.
Pleasant dreams.
- That did it.
Can't do it now.
- Oh, come on Gloria.
- I'm not in the mood.
I can't.
Cliff, I'm too scared.
- Gloria, come on.
- Can't Cliff.
- Why?
- That man's gonna come in again.
- He won't.
- No, I don't wanna, Cliff.
- Gloria.
- No, come on.
Go to sleep.
- You afraid of him?
- Yes.
- Bearded penguin.
(laughs)
- Oh, Cliff, please go to sleep.
Cliff, where are you going?
Cliff, come back here.
(growls)
- [Voiceover] Within me, and without me.
I honor this blood which gives me life.
(creepy organ music)
(door creaking)
(mysterious music)
(screaming)
- Come my dear, it's time
to drink the blood of life.
The rich, red, warm blood of life eternal.
Take the knife, my dear.
Take the knife and plunge it home.
Home.
To the warm, red sheath.
Higher.
Plunge it home.
- Gloria!
(crying)
(intense music)
(screaming)
(tires screeching)
- Oh please help me.
- Oh my God, I almost killed you.
Are you okay?
- My boyfriend's back there,
they're going to kill him.
- It's okay, I'm a doctor.
It'll be alright.
(dramatic music)
(crying)
Relax now.
- I wanna go, I don't wanna stay.
- Everything will be just fine.
- Please don't make me.
- I will help you.
This is a mild sedative,
I want you to take it now.
Here.
That will relax you, it
will make you sleepy.
Sleep, close your eyes, relax,
everything will be fine.
Sleep.
Relax.
Good girl.
- [Cliff] Leaky carburetor.
- Cliff?
- I must've flooded it
or something, I dunno.
'61 Cadillac, I mean, who expects trouble?
Guy said my fuel pump
quit or the points needed
sharpening or piston's full of shit.
- Cliff!
How did you get back here?
How did they let you go?
- I gave them a deposit.
We'll pick up the car tomorrow
and I'll give 'em a check.
- Oh Cliff, I was so worried about you,
thank God for that doctor.
- What doctor?
- Cliff, did you put me
back in these clothes?
How did we get back here?
Where's the doctor?
- Gloria, are you stoned?
- Oh wow, I don't understand.
You think I really had a bad dream?
- I think you had too
much pizza for breakfast.
- Come on Cliff, don't make
jokes when I'm really confused.
- Well, there's a solution for everything.
- Cliff, you always
have the same solution.
- I know, but they always work.
- [Voiceover] Don't worry
about her, my lovelies.
Our friends in town will
take care of things.
(sinister laughter)
- Take a deep breath, tell
me if you don't feel better.
- I still feel a little dizzy.
- Well you'll feel a
lot better once we get
something to eat.
I don't know, Gloria, I don't
know how to explain it to you.
I guess medically speaking
it's what they call
psychosomatic.
When the mind has some kind
of influence over the body.
I think you were probably just afraid.
I mean, being in a motel with
a guy for the first time.
- You mean like a deja vu?
- Exactly, deja vu.
Being in a place you think
you've been in before
when in fact you've
never really been there
in the first place.
- Cliff, you make it sound so easy.
- I think it's those stories
the old lady was telling you.
The one about the three
girls and the house.
- How do you know so
much about everything?
- I took Psych 101 before
I got kicked out of school.
Yeah.
You feel better?
- I guess so.
I guess I just overreact to everything.
Do you mind if I call Mom and
Dad, just to let them know
that we're okay?
- I'll do it for you.
- Oh no, better not.
Mom doesn't like you.
- [Voiceover] Operator.
- Yes operator, I'd like
to make a long-distance
phone call collect to Toronto, please.
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry, but we are unable
to complete any long
distance calls at this time.
- Oh well if there's any
problem I'll pay for it here.
- [Voiceover] No, that is not the problem.
Last week's snowstorm knocked all
the long distance lines out.
There are no calls going through.
- [Gloria] Well operator,
isn't there any other way
I can get through?
It's a very important phone call.
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry madam,
there's nothing I can do.
- [Gloria] Well could
I go to another phone?
- [Voiceover] Our servicemen
are working to repair
the lines, would you
care to try again later?
- Operator--
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry.
- I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.
- Just minding my own business here.
- Cliff, I hate this town.
Makes me feel so uncomfortable.
- There's nothing wrong
with this town, Gloria.
- Cliff, I've been thinking.
Why don't we go to a different place?
There's nothing to do around here anyway.
- Even if we wanted to go, we can't.
- Why?
- Because the car's in
the garage getting fixed.
- Oh come on, all we have
to do is go to the garage
and take it out and
bring it back to Toronto
to have it fixed.
- I know, but it's probably
in 100 pieces by now.
- Can you think of any more excuses?
You don't wanna go, do you?
- Gloria, you're being
totally unreasonable.
- Well I think you're
being totally unreasonable.
- You think I'm being
totally unreasonable?
Well look, why don't you
do whatever you like?
- I'm gonna take a bus back to Toronto.
- Okay, take a bus back to Toronto.
- You'd let me, wouldn't you?
- Have a nice trip.
Gloria, do whatever makes you happy,
and I'll do whatever makes me happy.
And you know what's gonna make
me really happy right now?
A big chocolate milkshake.
- [Voiceover] Operator.
- Yes operator, could
you please connect me
with the bus terminal?
- [Voiceover] There is no
bus terminal in Farnhamville.
- You mean you have no buses
going from here to Toronto?
- [Voiceover] I can't
give out that information,
you'll have to check the schedule.
- Well where do I get a schedule?
- [Voiceover] Edward's Drugstore has them.
Would you like me to connect you?
- Yes please.
- [Voiceover] Could you hold for a minute?
- Yes.
- [Voiceover] Good morning,
Edward's Drugstore.
- Yes sir, do you have a schedule of buses
going to Toronto?
- [Voiceover] Yes we do.
- Oh great, where are you located?
- [Voiceover] We're on the main street,
right next to the post office.
- Then I can come down right
now and pick up a ticket?
- [Voiceover] Well no
rush, plenty of seats,
you can get the ticket just
before you get on board.
- What time does the next bus leave?
- [Voiceover] Next Toronto
bus leaves at 10:30
tomorrow morning.
- Oh no.
- [Voiceover] Well if that's
too early you can have
a bus at 10:30--
(dramatic music)
- Thanks for stopping,
are you going to Toronto?
- Hey, it's the postcard girl.
You having a good time in town?
Can I take you somewhere?
- I thought you were
somebody else, I'm sorry.
- Hey wait a minute,
does this mean you don't
want to go anywhere with me?
- No thank you.
- Stupid.
- Well, you had enough?
- Cliff, tell me that you
love me and you want me
and you need me and
you'll never let me go!
- I love you, I want you, I need you,
and I'll never let you go, Gloria.
Now come on, let's take in the sights.
We can see the drugstore,
the grocery store,
there's a bowling alley.
I don't believe it.
The Monster That Devoured Cleveland,
and I Was A Teenage Centipede,
both on the double bill.
- I've already seen them.
- Want some meat pie?
- I'd rather have a kiss.
- Ow!
(giggles)
You almost took my finger off.
(ominous music)
(screams)
Gloria I haven't walked
this much since I was in
the cadets in grade 10.
- Oh Cliff, you were in the cadets?
Oh no, I think the cadets
are really great Cliff,
honestly.
- Getting hungry again too.
- What's the matter?
- Meat pie had a funny taste to it.
- Really?
It was on sale.
Well we could go back to the
motel and get something to eat,
that is if you'll carry me.
Hello officer.
- You kids got business in town?
- Actually we were just
sitting on the curb--
- Come on, get in the car.
We don't like vagrants around here.
- We're not vagrants.
We have a room down at
Mrs. Wainwright's motel.
- Better not be lying.
We got ways and means of
checking out, you know.
Besides, we don't fancy much
of strangers around here,
especially hippies and freaks.
- Sir, you must be mistaken, we're not--
- Shut up.
Get in the car.
Now, where did you say you were going?
- To the restaurant, that
is if it's not too much
out of your way.
- What do you think
this is, a goddamn taxi?
- Oh Cliff, I'm not
really hungry, are you?
- I could do with a bite to eat.
- This ain't no joyride, you know.
I'd as soon run you clowns in than to hear
any more of this guff.
(crying)
What's the matter with her?
- She's nervous, that's all.
She gets that way whenever
she gets picked up.
Thanks a lot.
- I suggest you don't
change you mind again.
'Cause I'll be waiting right here for you.
- Sorry Gloria.
Guess we'll just have
to go to the restaurant.
- Cliff, this is the same--
- Gloria.
- Oh Cliff, I'm scared.
- Gloria, you promised me.
Come on.
- Cliff, this doesn't look
like a restaurant to me.
- I really--
(yells)
- Cliff.
- Well I brought her.
- Thank you, Clifford.
Good evening, Gloria.
You'll stay to dinner.
- Ah Reverend, as a matter of
fact I'm not terribly hungry
so I might just grab a bite.
(yelling)
- I'm sorry Clifford, we
haven't finished with you yet.
- Gloria?
Gloria, this wasn't my idea, you know.
They made me do it.
Gloria, hey kid.
Come on, come on now, Gloria.
Gloria, I'm sorry.
(suspenseful music)
No, no, no, no, no.
♫ Now the day is over
♫ Night is drawing nigh
♫ Shadows of the evening
♫ Steal across the sky ♫
(grunting)
(haunting piano music)
- So that's the story of the four girls.
They were cannibals, and they ate men.
And rumor has it that they were never sick
a day in their lives.
- [Man] Hey that sounds great.
I think we'd love to see this place.
- [Mrs. Wainwright] Certainly,
I would be delighted
to take you, what time
would you like to go?
(mysterious music)
(screaming)
(eerie music)
- Well you got her, eh Reverend?
She's a looker alright.
That boy.
Ah, her boyfriend.
Ah, well I have the doc here
to take care of it anyway.
Alright.
Well we have another one, doc.
(ominous music)
- Cliff, where exactly are we anyway?
- [Cliff] I don't know!
I think we're on a side road somewhere.
- Could you be a little bit more specific?
- [Cliff] Gloria, I've
been driving all day
without stopping.
Now I've stopped and I'm, uh, busy.
Why don't you study the map?
- Well I am.
It seems like we're in
the middle of nowhere.
Cliff, are you sure you
know where we're going?
- [Cliff] Gloria, we picked
out a nice small town
where it's quiet, we're
gonna have a peaceful,
pleasant vacation, leave it to me.
- Okay.
Wow, it sure is beautiful here.
Oh Cliff, can you smell those evergreens?
- [Cliff] Yeah, standing right beside one.
- Wow, it's so quiet.
Hello.
Oooh-oooh.
Oooh-oooh.
Cliff!
Cliff, I think it's about time we go now.
Cliff?
Come on, Cliff.
Cliff, I'm not coming in there after you.
Okay, stop playing games.
Cliff?
Cliff?
Oh come on, I'm cold and I wanna go.
Cliff?
Cliff?
Oh Cliff, where are you?
Cliff?
(yells)
(screams)
Oh my God!
- (mumbling)
- Cliff!
Oh you are so sick!
- Oh Gloria, I just jumped out
from behind the tree there.
- Oh Cliff, I don't find
your joke very amusing.
- It was funny, you didn't
think it was, you okay?
Gloria, your heart's
going a mile a minute.
- See?
- I'm sorry.
Gloria, you know I wouldn't
do anything to hurt you.
- I've been calling you for 15 minutes,
I don't think you're very funny.
Oh Cliff, where are we going anyway?
I can't understand this map, gosh.
- I don't know, Gloria.
Now, we're going to Farning,
no no no Farnhamville.
- That's right, Farnhamville
the friendly city.
So how much further do we have to go?
- 10, 15 miles.
(engine trying to start)
- What's the matter?
- Nothing.
- Maybe there's not
enough air in the tires.
(engine trying to start)
Cliff, you're gonna flood it.
- I'm not gonna flood it, Gloria.
You have to give the gas enough
time to come out through the
carburetor, that's all.
We're gonna have to wait a while.
- That's okay.
(psychedelic rock music)
(turns radio off)
(engine trying to start)
- Needs air.
When I tell you, start the car, okay?
- Okay.
(engine trying to start)
- Not now, when I give you the signal!
(mysterious music)
Okay, try it now.
(honks)
(slams)
Not the horn, the ignition, Gloria!
- Huh?
- The key, turn on the key.
Try it now.
(engine trying to start)
That's it.
That's it, you got it.
- Come on, baby.
- Come on, baby!
- Come on baby!
- [Cliff] That's it,
that's it, you got it.
- You can do it come on, come on.
- You got it!
(engine revving)
Farnhamville, here we come.
Damnit.
- Now that's nice.
You think that we're gonna go anywhere
when you talk like that?
Cliff, the car understands.
You have to be nice to it.
Now wait a minute.
Now I know it's been hard on you,
it's very cold outside, and
I know that you'd rather
just be sitting someplace,
but if you could help us out
just this once, we'd really appreciate it.
- Gloria, please.
- Go ahead, talk like that.
Don't be sarcastic!
- I wasn't sarcastic, wasn't sarcastic,
wasn't sarcastic, car, wasn't sarcastic.
- Go ahead.
- It's gonna start, eh?
- Go ahead.
We love you.
- Love you, love you.
(engine starts)
- [Gloria] God bless you, car.
- [Cliff] Gloria, you
shoulda been a mechanic.
- Just wanna see if there's
a place to stay around here.
- Okay, I'm gonna see if
there are any postcards.
Hi, postcards inside?
- Hey, you seen this girl around?
- No, who is she?
- My sister.
She's been missing for six months.
- Yeah?
- How 'bout you, you seen her?
- I wouldn't know, I'm
just passing through.
Pretty.
- Yeah.
Well, if you see her around,
I'll be in town, okay?
- Yeah, right.
- Okay, thanks a lot.
- Take it easy.
Yes sir.
- I wanted to know if you could tell me
if there's a place to stay
around here, motel or something.
Just drove up with a broad,
wanna spend the weekend.
- Um, yeah, there's a nice
place, Mrs. Wainwright's
about a thousand yards
down the road there.
It's pretty nice.
Quiet.
- Yeah, cheap?
- Yeah, reasonable, it's not too bad.
- Okay, great.
Thanks a lot.
- Okay, take it easy.
- You know you shouldn't
play with that thing,
you might hurt yourself.
- Hiya Chief.
- What did that first guy want?
- He's checking up on one
of the Reverend's girls.
- The Reverend wouldn't be too
happy about that, would he?
- No.
- Well, I guess we'd better
take care of him, eh?
Hey Mose.
- Why don't you follow me and
we'll register in the office?
It's so nice to have
you young people visit.
We hardly get anyone around here anymore.
- But I don't understand,
it's so beautiful here.
- Yes, but it hasn't always been this way.
I guess all the folks are scared
off because of the legend.
- Legend?
- What legend is that, Mrs. Wainwright?
- Oh, it's the legend
about the three girls.
I guess it all started when
these three beautiful girls
began luring men to their farmhouse.
(intense music)
- Good morning.
Come on.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Haven't seen you here before.
- I don't drink much in bars.
- Are you alone?
- Oh, um--
- Can I join you?
- Do you want, yeah, sure, wanna sit down?
- Thank you.
- Is that a little too
close, maybe I can--
- No, no.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- You must be new around here.
- Yeah I'm actually just
sorta passing through town.
- Oh, that's too bad.
- It is?
- Well it's just that I share
a farm with two girlfriends
just outside of town.
- Oh, really?
I'm very interested in farming.
Dairy farming mostly, as a matter of fact.
Sort of in the dairy biz.
- Well it's too bad that
you're just passing through
'cause I thought we could get together,
you could spend a few days up at the farm
and have a really good time.
- I'd like that.
Actually I'm really just
on my vacation and I could
spend some time.
Wouldn't your girlfriends mind?
- Oh no, they wouldn't mind at all.
In fact, they'd really love it.
- Fill it up, sir?
- No, it's okay, I don't need any gas.
Listen, I'm in a bit of a hurry.
Could you tell me how
far it is to Buttonville?
- Yeah, it's about 40 miles
straight down this road here.
- 40 miles, eh?
- Yeah, there is a shortcut though.
- Oh?
- Yeah about three miles down here--
- Yeah?
- There's a dirt road
on the right hand side.
It'll cut your time in half
but it's pretty hard on your car.
- Oh don't worry about that, it's rented.
Listen, thank you very
much, that's terrific.
(mysterious music)
(intense music)
(eerie music)
- Clarissa, can I have
some more meat, please?
Clarissa.
- In a minute.
- All we ever do around
here is cook and eat.
Clarissa, can I please
have some more meat.
- Just a minute.
If I don't cut it properly,
it won't cook well.
- I don't care how you cut
it, all I want is about
three more pieces.
- What's going on here?
- Clarissa won't give me any more meat.
- Clarissa?
- If the meat isn't cut well
against the grain it won't be--
- It's fine the way it is.
He's very nice.
He'll fit in just fine.
- [Felix] Hi Earl.
- Hi Felix.
It's your roll, your roll, ready to go.
- It was my roll before breakfast.
- Sure, it's always your roll.
I own everything, you roll, I'll look on.
- Okay.
- 11.
- 11.
- Boardwalk.
- I'm on Boardwalk.
- 2,000.
- I just got eight dollars left.
- I'll take it.
- Was that the end of the game?
- Yes, I win again.
- I lose the game?
- Yes, you lose, I win.
- Rick.
- Hi, Felix Cranston.
- Hi Felix.
- Nice to meet you.
This is Earl.
- Hi.
- Hi, roll the dice.
- You guys live here?
- No, no.
- Well what are you doing here?
- Just taking it easy.
Kinda waiting around, you know.
- I gotta be out of here at 4:30.
- Where you going?
- Buttonville, I got a parade.
- What are you gonna be?
- I run the parade.
- Oh you mean you're like the
grand marshal kind of thing?
- No, I run parades, that's my job.
- [Felix] Organize?
- Yeah, it's Rick Parades
Enterprises Incorporated,
that's me.
- Almost as good as what you do?
- What do you do?
- I'm in the ice cream business.
- He's president of truck 12.
- Okay Earl, that's
enough with the jokes, eh?
I got a route, you know, driving a truck.
- What about you?
- Me?
I'm rich.
- Broads.
You're here, two of us, three.
- Yeah yeah, that's right.
- Earl?
- Finally, one for you, one for you.
- Those broads?
(laughing)
- We've been waiting all
the time for a third guy.
- That's what we've been waiting for.
- That's right, you can't leave now.
- Oh, forget the parade.
- You'll blow it for all of us.
- I gotta be in Buttonville.
- We can score.
- I haven't missed a
parade in eight years.
- [Earl] Have you ever
had this good of a reason?
- In case you hadn't
noticed, I decided to stay.
- Yes, it's rather nice to
have a man around the house.
- I notice you keep wearing
the same kind of things,
you girls.
You sisters?
- No, we share a lot of similar tastes.
- Fiona.
- Yes, Felix?
- You know yesterday
when we went for a walk
and you kinda said
you'd show me the house.
- Oh I will, I will, just be patient.
- I've been here for three days.
- Felix, you know we
can't make love tonight.
- Yeah but I thought just
maybe a little heavy petting.
- Felix.
- So he landed on Boardwalk,
had to pay me $2200,
and I won my seventh game in a row.
Clarissa, it was a terrific super, I mean,
I really enjoyed every bite of it.
I ate everything, just marvelous.
- Food can be a marvelous appetizer.
- I'm looking forward to
the main course myself.
Now?
Before dessert?
(mysterious music)
- It's alright, come on.
In me and without me, I honor the blood
which gives me life.
(screams)
- You know Fiona, it was really worth
waiting the three days.
- Oh, Felix.
I think you better go to your room now.
- Do I have to?
- Everyone will be getting up.
- I know.
Okay.
One last kiss?
- Alright.
Go on.
- Okay.
Fiona.
Fiona, what are you doing, no, no, no.
Don't!
- Good morning, Rick.
- Hiya.
Have you seen Anthea around?
- No.
- Know where she might be?
- No.
- Guess I'll look for her myself, then.
Morning, Bunker.
(growls)
(humming)
(laughing)
- You really gotta see one of my parades,
they're fantastic.
We got clowns and
kangaroos and roly-polys.
You know what's really strange?
Earl and Felix left and they
didn't even say goodbye.
And Earl forgot his Monopoly set.
- Listen, do you wanna talk about them,
or do you wanna be with me?
- [Voiceover] Within me and without me,
I honor this blood which gives me life.
(rooster crowing)
(rattling)
(ominous music)
(screaming)
- So that's the story of the three girls.
They were cannibals, and they ate men.
And rumor has it that they were
never sick a day in their lives.
- Really?
- Is this place still around?
- The house is still standing,
and it's a restaurant now.
They say the food is very good.
And if you like I can
take you there for supper.
- [Cliff] We're not gonna
see any cannibals up there,
are we?
- Oh no, that happened a long time ago.
I'm sure you'll love the restaurant.
I'll meet you around 5,
after you've settled in.
- Cliffy.
- Mm-hmm?
- Have you been to a motel
room with lots of women before?
- No, you're the first one.
- Oh, am I, Cliff?
- Mm-hmm.
Gloria?
- Yeah?
- I think I'm gonna take my coat off.
- Oh no, you don't have to, Cliff.
- No, I want to.
- Alright.
Oh no, Cliff, there's not
a television in our room.
- What do you need a TV
for when you've got me?
You know what we're gonna do?
- What?
- This afternoon we're gonna
take the car in to get fixed,
we're gonna pick up some wine, and then.
- Oh, Cliff, do you know
what I want you to do
more than anything right now?
- What's that?
- Play your guitar.
- Play my guitar?
- Yeah, you're my favorite musician.
- Right now?
Okay.
Okay, I'm gonna play an English ballad.
- Yeah.
- And this is a song about you.
- Did you write it?
- No.
- Oh, is that what English ballad means?
Yeah.
Oh Cliff.
♫ Early one morning ♫
Cliff?
You like me?
- Of course.
♫ Early one morning
♫ One morning in spring
♫ To hear the birds whistle
♫ The nightingale sing
♫ I met a fair maiden
♫ Who sweetly did sing
♫ I'm going to be married
♫ On ♫
Gloria?
Gloria?
I'm gonna take the car
in to get fixed, okay?
I'll be back in a couple of minutes.
- Okay.
- Okay, rest easy.
Here.
(hitting and grunting)
- Big mother, eh?
- Yeah.
- What are we gonna do with him?
- I dunno.
Maybe we better check it
out with the Chief, huh?
Yeah.
Anyways, that'll teach this
guy from snooping around.
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, there's something wrong in there.
It was rattling or knocking.
- Sounds like the carburetor.
Well, leave it here.
- Okay, pick it up tomorrow.
- Okay.
(mysterious music)
- Sam.
Now try and remember.
Did anybody hear a scream
or see any kind of a scuffle
going on?
- No sir.
- No think carefully.
- Did anybody see this
man come into the alley?
- No.
- Well, he's as dead as they come.
- Sure is.
- Of course, we can check all
of this down at headquarters
and if there's any witnesses, well,
they'll be taken care of.
But I think everything'll be okay.
Sam, I want you to do me a favor, alright?
I want you to take this
body down to my wife.
She'll know what to do with it, okay?
- Okay.
- Well good afternoon, Mrs. Wilson.
Can I help you with something?
- I'm looking for a
really good cut of meat.
- Ah, someone special for dinner.
- Why yes.
- What do I just have,
yes, this just came in
this morning.
- Is it really fresh?
- Mrs. Wilson, if it was any fresher,
it would get up and tell you itself.
- You'll really enjoy the restaurant.
It has a flavor all its own.
- Is it very expensive?
- The restaurant is run by
a very engaging young man,
I'm sure you'll get along splendidly.
All the folks from around here eat there,
it's become a real tourist attraction.
But you shouldn't have any problem.
Now you see that path over there?
Just follow it and make
sure you don't miss the bend
just past the big tree, a
little bit to the right,
and then just keep on walking
until you see the house.
- Thanks.
- Bye bye.
- Thanks for everything, Mrs. Wainwright.
- Bye bye, have a good
time, I'll see you later.
Eat well.
- There's something
strange about this road.
- Yeah, smells of manure.
- Did you ever live on a farm?
- Gloria, you don't have to be a farmer
to know manure when you smell it.
- I thought it was your coat.
- It is my coat.
- Oh, cool it.
(knocking)
Oh Cliff, I'm cold, let's go in.
This must be the place.
- Yeah.
Wow.
- I don't see anybody else here.
This doesn't even look--
- Good evening.
I'm the Reverend Alex St. John.
You are?
- Oh, I'm sorry, we have the
wrong place, we're here for--
- For dinner, yes, of course my dear.
- Cliff Sturgess.
- How do you do?
- Hi, fine.
- My dear.
- Gloria Wellaby.
- Gloria.
Enchanted.
- Thank you.
- Won't you come in?
- Sure.
I thought we would need reservations.
- Reservations, no.
May I take your coat?
- Sure.
- Lovely furs.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
- We don't really seem to
be dressed for the occasion,
seems very formal.
- Any way you are dressed is
perfectly delightful, my dear.
Will you sit down?
- Right.
- [Reverend] You will excuse me?
- Yes.
- Cliff, what kind of a place is this?
- Freaky.
- You're not kidding.
- Very theatrical.
- Wow.
- You know something?
- Yeah.
- I've seen that man before.
- No, no, no, I'm sorry.
No smoking allowed, it's one
of the rules of the house.
- Just a few puffs?
- Ah ah ah ah.
Smoking's bad for the
circulation of the blood.
- I didn't know that.
- Well actually that's a
very good rule to observe.
The house seems very old.
- Old.
Yes indeed, my dear.
House is very old.
We have a few moments before dinner.
May I show you around?
- That'd be really fun, yeah.
- Come, in here, my father's library.
He died with a book in his hand.
And in here, the study.
Now this is the (mumbles).
Have you heard of him?
The young lad was later
suspected of having stuffed
his mother-in-law into
an old rolltop desk.
She was a dreadful woman,
she was the chief carrier
of a particular social
disease found in this part
of the country.
- [Gloria] Oh Cliff, look.
- [Reverend] This is
my grandfather's piano.
He was a man of rare taste and gusto,
a musical genius.
Sometimes still, you know,
in the dead of evening,
religious hymns seem to fill this room.
- [Cliff] That's amazing, Rev.
- [Reverend] Do you know just
the other day I thought I saw
my distant cousin Rex?
It's rumored that he liked men,
sometimes exceedingly well.
Ah well, he did produce
some very fine children,
but to be honest none of them
resemble him in the slightest.
Clifford, I think you'll be
interested in this sword.
Now it was owned by a French executioner,
and legend has it that
just as he was about to
decapitate an innocent man,
it slipped out of his hand
and cut off his own head.
- [Gloria] How horrible!
- [Reverend] Oh, this
things happen, my dear.
Now this fine set of
silver was supposedly owned
by the Duchess of Milan.
Do you know she one night
poisoned a whole dinner party
just because she forgot--
- [Gloria] Eew.
- [Reverend] I'm sorry my dear,
I forgot we were just about
to sit down to dinner.
And this ugly assortment
belonged to the three
previous occupants of this
house, they were three
perverted, awful young ladies.
I suppose I should take them down,
but there's a frightful
curse hanging over them,
and I confess I am a
little bit superstitious.
Mrs. Wainwright always
sends such charming guests.
- Thank you.
Cliff, Cliff?
Do you see anything on
here that you might like?
- There's only one item on the menu.
- Yes Clifford, I think
you'll enjoy what we
have prepared for you.
- Well we'll have two.
- Two.
May I join you?
(ominous music)
Thank you, my dear.
Mmm, 1913 was a beautiful year.
We grow the grapes
ourselves, our own vineyards.
They grow on my grandfather's grave.
I don't know, there's
something about human remains
that add a certain earthy quality to wine.
To Grandfather.
- Grandfather.
- I notice a certain intimacy between you.
You've not been together long?
- [Gloria] A month.
- Two weeks.
- Clifford, a month.
- I understand, I understand.
And tell me, Clifford, what do you do?
- I play music.
- [Reverend] Music, what kind of music
do you play, Clifford?
- Rock.
- Rock, have you seen my--
- Rock, I'm a rock musician.
- You know Reverend,
like the Rolling Stones?
- I'm an ax picker.
- An ax picker.
Clifford, you're a man after my own heart.
Are you enjoying dinner?
- It's delicious.
- It's wet.
- May I entertain you
with stories of the house?
- We'd just as soon eat, Reverend.
- I think it'd be lovely, Reverend.
- Very droll Clifford, very droll.
Are you familiar with
the legend of the house?
- About the three cannibals?
Mrs. Wainwright told us about it.
- Ah, then you'll be interested to know
that this is the very
table at which the victims
ate their last dinner on earth.
(scream)
(intense music)
- Clifford, let's go.
(crying out)
- Let's go.
Ah, change, change.
- What for?
- For a tip.
You know, those tapestries
hang really well from this
side of the room.
- Yes they do.
- They do.
- My dear.
Clifford is this yours?
- No, it's ours, actually,
we just put it down
to see if we had enough money.
- Please, please, please, please, please.
Dinner is my pleasure and my treat.
I owe you an explanation for the scream.
There's a maniac at large,
and one of the girls
thought she saw him peering
in the kitchen window.
- Oh no, she was mistaken.
- I don't think.
I'm ruining your dinner.
Let's have dessert.
(rings bell)
I think you'll enjoy this.
- This is a lovely dinner, dear.
The food is terrific.
You really outdid yourself.
- I did save the best parts for you.
(organ music)
(clinks glass)
- I'd like to propose a
toast to the Reverend.
Our guiding spirit.
- [All] To the Reverend.
(laughing)
- Music be the fruit of life, play on.
- Ah, Shakespeare.
Are you familiar with this one, Clifford?
It is the time of night
when graves have yawned
and yielded up their
dead, and yonder shines
aurora's harbinger, whose approach ghosts,
wandering here and there,
true comb the churchyards.
Damned spirits all that
in crossways and floods
have burial already to
their wormy beds are gone.
Fear less day should
look their shames upon
they willfully themselves
exile from light,
and must for I consort
with black browed night.
- Sounds very familiar.
♫ When the morning waken
♫ Then may we arise
♫ Pure and fresh and sinless
♫ In thy holy eyes
♫ Ooh ♫
(clapping)
- Very good, it's very good.
- To the ladies.
- To the ladies!
I am a lady.
- Well kid, wanna hit the road?
- Okay, let me finish this.
- Why don't you stay here the night?
- No we can't, Reverend,
we have to get back.
- Please I have an old bed upstairs,
it's ancient but it's comfortable.
- Well I think we've
overstayed our welcome.
- As you wish.
Coats.
Clifford.
If you must go home, will
you promise me one thing?
As you're walking through the woods,
if you hear any noise, will
you run as fast as you can?
Promise me that.
And Clifford.
Don't look back.
Well then.
Oh.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Goodnight Clifford,
thank you for coming.
Gloria.
Come, I'll show you to the door.
(eerie music)
(thunder rumbling)
- I think maybe we
should stay here tonight.
- Yeah.
Hi Reverend.
Reverend, we've changed our mind.
- Well that's fine, just fine.
I'm sure you'll enjoy the
room we have prepared.
Come in, this will be your room tonight.
It belonged to my Aunt
Priscilla, she died, poor thing,
burned at the stake.
Oh well, your bedclothes are
on the cupboard behind you,
have a very nice sleep.
- Thank you very much, Reverend.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight, Priscilla.
- What will you have
for dinner my lovelies,
what will you have?
Not the fingers my dear,
not the fingers, no.
How about muscles?
The arms?
Deep red meat of the arms?
What will you have, my dear?
The calves?
The rich, red, meaty calves?
And my queen, for you the
soft white meat of the thighs.
The rich, soft thighs.
My darlings, we shall
drink the blood of life,
the blood of life eternal,
and we shall live forever,
forever, you my queens, and I your king.
(dog barking)
- Oh Cliff.
I think we shouldn't.
Cliff.
- Mm-hmm?
- Could you take off your glasses?
- Oh, sure.
(tapping)
- Oh my God.
- I'm sorry, I've disturbed you.
Please don't worry about
any noises in the night.
Pleasant dreams.
- That did it.
Can't do it now.
- Oh, come on Gloria.
- I'm not in the mood.
I can't.
Cliff, I'm too scared.
- Gloria, come on.
- Can't Cliff.
- Why?
- That man's gonna come in again.
- He won't.
- No, I don't wanna, Cliff.
- Gloria.
- No, come on.
Go to sleep.
- You afraid of him?
- Yes.
- Bearded penguin.
(laughs)
- Oh, Cliff, please go to sleep.
Cliff, where are you going?
Cliff, come back here.
(growls)
- [Voiceover] Within me, and without me.
I honor this blood which gives me life.
(creepy organ music)
(door creaking)
(mysterious music)
(screaming)
- Come my dear, it's time
to drink the blood of life.
The rich, red, warm blood of life eternal.
Take the knife, my dear.
Take the knife and plunge it home.
Home.
To the warm, red sheath.
Higher.
Plunge it home.
- Gloria!
(crying)
(intense music)
(screaming)
(tires screeching)
- Oh please help me.
- Oh my God, I almost killed you.
Are you okay?
- My boyfriend's back there,
they're going to kill him.
- It's okay, I'm a doctor.
It'll be alright.
(dramatic music)
(crying)
Relax now.
- I wanna go, I don't wanna stay.
- Everything will be just fine.
- Please don't make me.
- I will help you.
This is a mild sedative,
I want you to take it now.
Here.
That will relax you, it
will make you sleepy.
Sleep, close your eyes, relax,
everything will be fine.
Sleep.
Relax.
Good girl.
- [Cliff] Leaky carburetor.
- Cliff?
- I must've flooded it
or something, I dunno.
'61 Cadillac, I mean, who expects trouble?
Guy said my fuel pump
quit or the points needed
sharpening or piston's full of shit.
- Cliff!
How did you get back here?
How did they let you go?
- I gave them a deposit.
We'll pick up the car tomorrow
and I'll give 'em a check.
- Oh Cliff, I was so worried about you,
thank God for that doctor.
- What doctor?
- Cliff, did you put me
back in these clothes?
How did we get back here?
Where's the doctor?
- Gloria, are you stoned?
- Oh wow, I don't understand.
You think I really had a bad dream?
- I think you had too
much pizza for breakfast.
- Come on Cliff, don't make
jokes when I'm really confused.
- Well, there's a solution for everything.
- Cliff, you always
have the same solution.
- I know, but they always work.
- [Voiceover] Don't worry
about her, my lovelies.
Our friends in town will
take care of things.
(sinister laughter)
- Take a deep breath, tell
me if you don't feel better.
- I still feel a little dizzy.
- Well you'll feel a
lot better once we get
something to eat.
I don't know, Gloria, I don't
know how to explain it to you.
I guess medically speaking
it's what they call
psychosomatic.
When the mind has some kind
of influence over the body.
I think you were probably just afraid.
I mean, being in a motel with
a guy for the first time.
- You mean like a deja vu?
- Exactly, deja vu.
Being in a place you think
you've been in before
when in fact you've
never really been there
in the first place.
- Cliff, you make it sound so easy.
- I think it's those stories
the old lady was telling you.
The one about the three
girls and the house.
- How do you know so
much about everything?
- I took Psych 101 before
I got kicked out of school.
Yeah.
You feel better?
- I guess so.
I guess I just overreact to everything.
Do you mind if I call Mom and
Dad, just to let them know
that we're okay?
- I'll do it for you.
- Oh no, better not.
Mom doesn't like you.
- [Voiceover] Operator.
- Yes operator, I'd like
to make a long-distance
phone call collect to Toronto, please.
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry, but we are unable
to complete any long
distance calls at this time.
- Oh well if there's any
problem I'll pay for it here.
- [Voiceover] No, that is not the problem.
Last week's snowstorm knocked all
the long distance lines out.
There are no calls going through.
- [Gloria] Well operator,
isn't there any other way
I can get through?
It's a very important phone call.
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry madam,
there's nothing I can do.
- [Gloria] Well could
I go to another phone?
- [Voiceover] Our servicemen
are working to repair
the lines, would you
care to try again later?
- Operator--
- [Voiceover] I'm sorry.
- I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.
- Just minding my own business here.
- Cliff, I hate this town.
Makes me feel so uncomfortable.
- There's nothing wrong
with this town, Gloria.
- Cliff, I've been thinking.
Why don't we go to a different place?
There's nothing to do around here anyway.
- Even if we wanted to go, we can't.
- Why?
- Because the car's in
the garage getting fixed.
- Oh come on, all we have
to do is go to the garage
and take it out and
bring it back to Toronto
to have it fixed.
- I know, but it's probably
in 100 pieces by now.
- Can you think of any more excuses?
You don't wanna go, do you?
- Gloria, you're being
totally unreasonable.
- Well I think you're
being totally unreasonable.
- You think I'm being
totally unreasonable?
Well look, why don't you
do whatever you like?
- I'm gonna take a bus back to Toronto.
- Okay, take a bus back to Toronto.
- You'd let me, wouldn't you?
- Have a nice trip.
Gloria, do whatever makes you happy,
and I'll do whatever makes me happy.
And you know what's gonna make
me really happy right now?
A big chocolate milkshake.
- [Voiceover] Operator.
- Yes operator, could
you please connect me
with the bus terminal?
- [Voiceover] There is no
bus terminal in Farnhamville.
- You mean you have no buses
going from here to Toronto?
- [Voiceover] I can't
give out that information,
you'll have to check the schedule.
- Well where do I get a schedule?
- [Voiceover] Edward's Drugstore has them.
Would you like me to connect you?
- Yes please.
- [Voiceover] Could you hold for a minute?
- Yes.
- [Voiceover] Good morning,
Edward's Drugstore.
- Yes sir, do you have a schedule of buses
going to Toronto?
- [Voiceover] Yes we do.
- Oh great, where are you located?
- [Voiceover] We're on the main street,
right next to the post office.
- Then I can come down right
now and pick up a ticket?
- [Voiceover] Well no
rush, plenty of seats,
you can get the ticket just
before you get on board.
- What time does the next bus leave?
- [Voiceover] Next Toronto
bus leaves at 10:30
tomorrow morning.
- Oh no.
- [Voiceover] Well if that's
too early you can have
a bus at 10:30--
(dramatic music)
- Thanks for stopping,
are you going to Toronto?
- Hey, it's the postcard girl.
You having a good time in town?
Can I take you somewhere?
- I thought you were
somebody else, I'm sorry.
- Hey wait a minute,
does this mean you don't
want to go anywhere with me?
- No thank you.
- Stupid.
- Well, you had enough?
- Cliff, tell me that you
love me and you want me
and you need me and
you'll never let me go!
- I love you, I want you, I need you,
and I'll never let you go, Gloria.
Now come on, let's take in the sights.
We can see the drugstore,
the grocery store,
there's a bowling alley.
I don't believe it.
The Monster That Devoured Cleveland,
and I Was A Teenage Centipede,
both on the double bill.
- I've already seen them.
- Want some meat pie?
- I'd rather have a kiss.
- Ow!
(giggles)
You almost took my finger off.
(ominous music)
(screams)
Gloria I haven't walked
this much since I was in
the cadets in grade 10.
- Oh Cliff, you were in the cadets?
Oh no, I think the cadets
are really great Cliff,
honestly.
- Getting hungry again too.
- What's the matter?
- Meat pie had a funny taste to it.
- Really?
It was on sale.
Well we could go back to the
motel and get something to eat,
that is if you'll carry me.
Hello officer.
- You kids got business in town?
- Actually we were just
sitting on the curb--
- Come on, get in the car.
We don't like vagrants around here.
- We're not vagrants.
We have a room down at
Mrs. Wainwright's motel.
- Better not be lying.
We got ways and means of
checking out, you know.
Besides, we don't fancy much
of strangers around here,
especially hippies and freaks.
- Sir, you must be mistaken, we're not--
- Shut up.
Get in the car.
Now, where did you say you were going?
- To the restaurant, that
is if it's not too much
out of your way.
- What do you think
this is, a goddamn taxi?
- Oh Cliff, I'm not
really hungry, are you?
- I could do with a bite to eat.
- This ain't no joyride, you know.
I'd as soon run you clowns in than to hear
any more of this guff.
(crying)
What's the matter with her?
- She's nervous, that's all.
She gets that way whenever
she gets picked up.
Thanks a lot.
- I suggest you don't
change you mind again.
'Cause I'll be waiting right here for you.
- Sorry Gloria.
Guess we'll just have
to go to the restaurant.
- Cliff, this is the same--
- Gloria.
- Oh Cliff, I'm scared.
- Gloria, you promised me.
Come on.
- Cliff, this doesn't look
like a restaurant to me.
- I really--
(yells)
- Cliff.
- Well I brought her.
- Thank you, Clifford.
Good evening, Gloria.
You'll stay to dinner.
- Ah Reverend, as a matter of
fact I'm not terribly hungry
so I might just grab a bite.
(yelling)
- I'm sorry Clifford, we
haven't finished with you yet.
- Gloria?
Gloria, this wasn't my idea, you know.
They made me do it.
Gloria, hey kid.
Come on, come on now, Gloria.
Gloria, I'm sorry.
(suspenseful music)
No, no, no, no, no.
♫ Now the day is over
♫ Night is drawing nigh
♫ Shadows of the evening
♫ Steal across the sky ♫
(grunting)
(haunting piano music)
- So that's the story of the four girls.
They were cannibals, and they ate men.
And rumor has it that they were never sick
a day in their lives.
- [Man] Hey that sounds great.
I think we'd love to see this place.
- [Mrs. Wainwright] Certainly,
I would be delighted
to take you, what time
would you like to go?
(mysterious music)