Bunty Aur Babli (2005) - full transcript
Rakesh (Abhishek Bachchan) is a man of schemes, ideas, invention and restlessness. His small town begins to feel too small for his King size plans. In another part of India crinkle nosed small town girl, Vimmi (Rani Mukerji) doesn't want to become just another young marriageable girl. In her mind she is the "Miss India" that the world can't get enough of. So, they decide to fly the coup. Somewhere along their individual journeys, Rakesh and Vimmi meet. And in a moment of mistaken truth, the legend of Bunty and Babli are born. And the world gets turned on its head!. We follow the duo through caper after caper, in which they are spiritual gurus; bureaucrat and secretary, gangster and moll; business partners; hen pecked husband and pregnant wife, vagabonds and caught-in-a-downpour lovers.We watch them run rings around rajahs, power brokers, shaadi bandwallahs, millionaires, investors, leaders, ministers, elephants, explorers, hoteliers, chai boys and one very very upset policeman, DCP Dashrath Singh (Amitabh Bachchan).
the land that glistens, shines..
..the land bedecked with
the glitter of dreams..
..beckoning you..
if you nurse a hunger,
she says, here..
you'll find what
satisfies it. Come..
rub your shoulders.
till they're blue..
with fame, wealth, power, glory..
..and your life becomes..
..a sunlit dream you
never want to wake out of
Yes, this is India.. a dream..
..that Bunty and Babli
dreamt every night of their lives
And this is the India they live in..
..an India that says..
your dreams should end
where your arms do..
and you should feel only as
much hunger as you can satisfy..
step forward..
but only when. you're in
step with the others..
float to the top but not
at the cost of anyone else
love, compassion, honesty, respect..
..are what matter most..
this too is India..
the India Bunty and Babli grew up in
but didn't feel
like they belonged to
This world we live in
has two kinds of people
One, the kind that does just
one thing all their lives and..
the kind that does..
..just about everything in one life
I didn't say that, they did and they
didn't just say it, they lived it
And how! No one ever lived life..
..like they lived
theirs and perhaps..
..no one ever will
So much excitement.. so
much adventure, so many joys..
..all in one single lifetime..
no one could have imagined
it possible, not even them.
Or then again maybe they could have
Small town cocoons
These dull afternoons..
I want to pack them up
and go away.. away..
The rains come slow
The river lies low..
The sea will carry me away
Small town cocoons
These dull afternoons..
I want to pack them up
and go away.. away..
The rains come slow
The river lies low..
The sea will carry me away
Going away, I'm going
away Oh Ram Chand re..
Dhadak'dhadak
Dhadak'dhadak Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak
Dhadak'dhadak Hear the whistle blow
Dhadak'dhadak
Dhadak'dhadak Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Call me, oh, watch me go..
Stand aside, make way for me
Those clouds are mine to hold
Burnt in black on a white sheet sky
I'll write my name, big and bold
On the street that
curves around the moon..
At the bend is where I'll stay
On the street that curves around
the moon I'll stay far, far away
Going away, I'm going
away Oh Ram Chand re..
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Hear the whistle blow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Call me, oh, watch me go..
Small town cocoons
These dull afternoons
I want to pack them up
and go away.. away..
Small town cocoons
These dull afternoons..
I want to pack them up
and go away.. away..
The rains come slow
The river lies low..
The sea will carry me away
Going away, I'm going
away Oh Ram Chand re..
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Hear the whistle blow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Call me, oh, watch me go..
When I ride l carry in my hair..
The cool whispers of the wind
Ride across the earth, the sky
Leave the world behind, unhinged
My forehead adorned, my jewel,
the moon I can't walk
unnoticed amidst the stars
moon I can't live
unnoticed up here with stars
Going away, I'm going
away Oh Ram Chand re..
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Watch the smoke billow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Hear the whistle blow
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Call me, oh, watch me go..
Dhadak'dhadak Dhadak'dhadak
Call me, oh, watch me go..
It's not going to come.
- It will
It won't.
- It will
Boy, go down to the
tap and have your bath
Or you'll be standing at
the end of a very long line
No dearth of people
wanting to get into a line
What do you mean?
- What I mean Ma is..
this world has two kinds of people,
one, those who line up before taps..
and two, those who make themselves..
..taps so they won't
need to stand in any line
I happen to belong to the latter.
- You don't belong anywhere
You've already spent forty
rupees on this gibberish
How much more will you blow up?
- Ma, how many times do I tell you..
I'm not spending anything.
This is an investment
For fifty bucks, this shower is up
and running.. then l'll fix it..
..to the community tap and everyone's
willing to part with fifty paise..
..to bathe in a shower. If five
people use it everyday, that's 2.50
In twenty days, fifty bucks are back
That's 2.50 in profits
everyday from each shower
Stop. You're making my head spin
The problem with this Fursatganj,
talking sense sends heads spinning
Anyway, do you
remember my chit fund idea?
A finance company in Lucknow..
- I don't want to know anything!
If you don't stop now you'll
surely go to jail some day
There.. l told you it'll come
Of course it will. Why won't it?
How else will he drown his future?
Why.. oh today was your interview
for the railway job! You didn't go?
I went! Pandey'ji
called to say that..
before I recommend my
son for another interview..
..I should at least make sure
that he drags himself
there on his own two legs
I've lain my' five years
in the service on the line..
..and made him agree for
another chance tomorrow
Thank God he agreed
How does that matter?
I need to agree too
Rakesh, we're trying
to be serious here
I told him I don't want
to be a ticket collector
So what do you want to be? The
maker of failed schemes, for life?
All of Fursatganj thinks
you're a deluded Don Quixote
You want them to coin new
euphemisms for you? Everyone..
Fursatganj is packed with asses.
And all asses can do is..
..chew the cud and bear the burden.
I wasn't born to do either
Oh you'll become a
Birla-Tata-Ambani? - Why can't l be?
They didn't fall out of the sky. They
too were born here on this earth
At least they were born here.
You belong to a
different planet altogether!
Dad, don't get me started again.
I've made up my mind
I'm not going to waste my
entire life trapped in a job
Look here
I've spent thirty
five years in this job..
..You think my
life's been a total waste?
After a lifetime of service,
does the government even bother..
about your opinion?
After thirty five years of..
shuttling up and down that same train
route, does even one passenger..
from all those
thousand trips remember..
..what you look like
in your shabby coat?
When you die, will anybody
except Ma and I, shed a single tear?
Will the railways take a day off?
Dad your life means nothing.
There's no respect,
no fun, no meaning
When I walk wearing this shabby coat,
that seems to embarrass you so much..
..people stop in their
tracks to pay me their respects
Shopkeepers are up on their feet
to attend to Mr. Ticket Collector
Why? Because my poor
black cotton coat..
is untainted by ill-gotten gain
it is the mark of my esteem
Rakesh..
the interview is at 9
o'clock tomorrow morning
Get there in time. Or get lost
Find a meaning for your life wherever
you want, however you want to
Because we can't live up
to your high expectations..
we're sorry
There's something about you baby
You too
You're not half bad either
Go easy on the lipstick..
it shouldn't look too tacky.
And one thing you ought to know
A ragged skirt doesn't make you sexy
It's what's in your eyes..
like in mine.
Dear God..
my daughter has gone insane!
- If worshipping my beauty..
..is tantamount to being insane,
then I plead insanity
If craving for fame is
insane then I plead insanity
If the desire to renounce
this pigeon-hole Pankinagar..
..for the great wide
marvellous world outside is insane..
then I plead complete insanity
And you are driving me nuts.
Take off that shirt
I'm sorry, I don't believe
beauty needs cheap exposure
One tight slap and all
your beliefs will change
You've ruined all his best shirts
Ruined? These shirts will fetch
millions. There'll be grand auctions
Supermodel Vimmi's shirts! The ones
she wore when she dreamt of success
Ladies and gents, do I hear a
hundred thousand.. One.. Two.. Three!
Jassi, where's my shirt?
Right here..
What's she up to now?
- She's just fooling around..
Fooling around? Go on,
enjoy yourself..
till the time you can
What are you trying to do?
- Trying to be coy about my marriage
But doesn't seem to be
coming too naturally
Your father isn't joking. You
won't find a man like Surinder..
..even if you turn Kanpur and Lucknow
inside out. Count your blessings..
..a head clerk has
fallen into your lap that..
..too in a place like Pankinagar
Papa'ji, I think..
I'll run away from home
Listen to her!
I kept telling you we
shouldn't allow cable tv in her room
All day-and-nights she's whispering
to those naked witches on her walls
And now she even wants to run away.
- No harm in that, no?
You go ahead, run away
But see, it's 1 1 o'clock.
Eat lunch before running
What are you saying?
- I don't want a weight on my mind..
..my daughter running
away on an empty stomach?
I'm warning you,
I'll really run away..
..if you even think
of marrying me off..
to that.. that ten out of ten!
- Ten out of ten?
That ass always got ten out of..
..ten in every
godforsaken subject.. what a nerd
Who wouldn't want to marry such a
man? - Then why don't you? Spare me
Now get out of that outfit and
help your mother with the cooking
I've called them to lunch tomorrow
I want things to be finalised before
the evening tea hits the table
Enough. Don't make me hurt you
Why are you taking them off?
- You don't know why?
It's time you realised that you
can't live like you want to anymore..
..You'll have to adjust
to your new family's ways
You'll eat, drink, walk,
sleep the way they want you to
Look, l'm your mother. All
I want is to see you happy
Forget all of this
You're leaving this for a new world.
- It feels like I'm leaving the world
The more you think about it,
the more you'll hurt
Just do as I say.
You'll learn to be happy
Mummy, if I request Papa'ji
not to marry me offjust yet..
..will he listen?
The facial cream is on the
washbasin. Don't forget to apply it
Tea.. piping hot tea..
A little extra milk
never killed a cow. - Sir?
I said, two extra
teaspoonfuls of milk never killed..
..the calf's mother. Pour
There's more milk than water in it,
sir. - More milk, I said..
..Hey give back my glass
Catch it if you can
Your name sir? - I'm what
you'd call Raj Kapoor Tiwari
Where's your seat here, show me..
I'm not on your list..
the other one.
I talked to the
ticket checker, paid him
Oh, so you've paid him a bribe
No, no..
- Give me your address
Why do you need my address?
Do you see that berth number?
Take a look.
- Number seven
Coach FC 1, berth number 7
Always reserved for..
the Fursatganj staff
going to Lucknow. I've been..
..using this berth for 3 years
The entire railway
division knows that.
How could anyone
have given it to you?
Could you tug that
chain for me please?
You think you're the first
person to come up with this idea?
We spend eight hours a day in offices
like this, chewing tobacco, eh?
200 out of every 100 finance companies
dream of a scheme like this..
but trip over their own two feet..
..trying to find 500 investors
to chip in a thousand rupees each
The answer to my next
question is on your face but..
I'll ask you anyway.. Mister,
where are your 500 investors?
What if I tell you I have them?
Where?
Here
I've slogged it out
for a whole year, sir
I've gotten together 500 investors..
..from my town and
the neighbouring ones..
..willing to put up a thousand rupees
each in any good finance company
Where are you from?
Fursatganj
Fursatganj! Where l was once
Not one finance company..
..will waste five minutes
over a list like this one.
Talk of investments
Small town-guys have a habit of
dreaming big. No ban on dreaming..
..Indulge yourself
But next time, come up
with a scheme that..
..a thousand others haven't thought
up before you. Get it? Now excuse me
Where are you going, lady?
- To enter the contest
You can't go in.
- If l can't go inside..
..how do I take part
in the competition?
Let me in. l've come really far
I said, you can't go in.
- I say, I have to enter
Can l help you?
- Yes, myself Vimmi Saluja..
I've come to enter the contest.
- You're too late
What?
- The entries closed two days ago
You mean the contest's begun?
- No, not yet
Oh, that's a relief.
- I said, entries have closed
But the contest hasn't begun!
- I said "the-entries-have-closed"
So open up for two minutes,
I'll quickly squeeze in!
You're from some village?
Miss Quickly-squeeze-in!
This is no village fair to
squeeze-in-slip-out when-you-wish
This is the Miss lndia contest,
but what would you know?
Oh c'mon Pammi, forget it
One minute.. would I know what?
- The desire and the ability..
..to become Miss lndia are two
very different things. So go home..
..and start a beauty parlour.
- Why not beauty-parlour yourself?
Excuse me?
- Ever watched your figure?
At least ten kilos overweight..
Ever watched your figure? At
least ten kilos overweight..
..with miles-thick lipstick.
You know all about make-up.
Beauty parlour's for you
What a bitch
You bitch
-=Deathracer=-
Listen..
Yes?
- Please come with me to the toilet
It's right at the end of the
platform and it's really dark
Come
Weren't you on the
Jhansi Mail this morning?
Returning? Here on business?
Yes I came for the
Miss India contest
So how was it?
Good.. very good
I got through the first round
Good.. good.. Miss India!
And you? Here on business too?
- Oh no.. no..
Work is something I
don't really believe in
I came here for a meeting
There's a finance company here,
they want to buy my scheme
I had to come personally you see,
it's a matter of millions
So, you're becoming a model soon?
- I guess so
You'll become famous.
- Yes.. I guess so
People will buzz around
you like bees around honey
Yes.. I guess they will
Why are you crying?
I didn't mean to insult you
No, don't take me otherwise
I belong to a decent family,
I wouldn't dream of it
Calm down, everyone's watching
Poor thing.. she's in grieving
I was only sympathising..
Everything's fine
Mummy.
You'll be the first girl to cry after
making it to the Miss India contest
I didn't make it anywhere
Aren't you ashamed of lying?
Actually, I lied too..
..the manager of the finance
company didn't quite buy my scheme..
I think he doesn't have the drive
Bloody idiot
Foulmouthing.. me?
Escort her to the loo
and then get abused for it?
I escorted you! Who
do you think you are?
You mean if you go back now?
- Wedding bells..
That's too bad.
- Very
Then?
I'll run away.
You already have
So, what'll you do now?
- What'll you do?
Whatever I do, I'm not giving up.
And l'm not going back home
Then, where will you go?
Kanpur
Why Kanpur? - The
company has a head office there
I'll show my scheme to senior
officers, I'm sure they'll get it
Why don't you come along to Kanpur?
- Who me?
Miss India contests
are held all over.
Maybe they'll allow
you to enter there
You got to find a
way into the contest..
..else what use was running away?
Kanpur!
So long, l guess the next
time I see you it'll be on TV
I guess so. Thank you. And
good luck for your big meeting
Thanks but that was superfluous.
I only need to make a
presentation and voila!
I'll have 100 finance
companies running rings around me
See you
Unbelievable. Got to admit..
very few people have brains as sharp
I say, just once in a whole year,
let me meet just one such person
But two in a single day,
unbelievable!
Would you believe..
just half an hour ago, another man
came to me with an identical scheme
Who?
- Manager of our Lucknow branch..
Mr Qureishi! Imagine.. a rare
gem lay buried in my own backyard
He got a 10,000 bonus on the spot!
..He even had a
list of 500 investors.
Unbelievable! What a man!
- Where's he staying?
Landmark Hotel.
- In Landmark! And why not?
The 10,000 bonus!
Give me as much l'll go
to live in a five star too
Next?
- Vimmi Saluja
Address?
- 2/5 Ballygunj, Pankinagar
One minute..
Doesn't Pankinagar fall
within the Lucknow district?
It does?
- Yes, Lucknow district
You didn't fill up
the form in Lucknow?
What difference, here or there?
I was passing through Kanpur so
I thought I'll get it over with
Very good
Please step outside
Sir'ji, just a matter of an address..
- Go away! Rules are rules
Please..
- Get lost
Oversmartness
Look, l can't bend the rules
But if you wish..
I can forget rules for a while
Yes sir!
- But nothing comes for free
Sir, I'll do whatever you wish!
Very good! Once you're Miss India..
..you'll have all the wealth, all
the fame your heart ever desired
But I? I'm still stuck to
the same.. chair and table
Oh sure..
I have nothing right now..
but I promise, when l'm Miss India..
I'll pay you..
everything you'll ever want
You're mistaken. You have everything
I'll ever want.. right now
I won't force you.
Registration closes in five minutes.
Think it over
You'll find me at the same table
What's your name?
- Jajjan
You make tea?
- No, I serve tea
This world we live in boy,
has two kinds of people
One, those who serve tea.
And those to whom tea is served
The faster you
become one of the latter..
..the better the
life that you'll live
Has somebody hurt you?
Two teas and chips
Two?
Why? Problem?
- No. But who's the second cup for?
If l drink two cups,
will it start a war?
God, this world we live in!
Get a hold on this kid
It's no use.
- What?
No use being earnest,
unwitting fools getting
shoved in stinking little towns
Then?
Bombay..
..the only city in all of lndia where
a man is recognised for his worth..
the only place where you can start..
..from the pavement
and end up in palaces..
where ambition isn't pushed around,
but cheered, egging you on
How're you so sure?
- How..
if Dhirubhai Ambani, Ratan Tata,
Birla had been in Lucknow-Kanpur..
..they'd be swatting flies in Ambani
General Stores, Tata Flour Mills..
..And Birla Tobacco Stall.
Bombay.. gave them the
recognition they deserved
Look where it got them..
So you want to go Bombay?
You can come along too.
What'll you do here?
All the top models are in Bombay.
Damn this
narrow-minded small-town mob
It's the place for Miss lndia, no?
- Yes
A ticket to Bombay,
how much would it cost?
Not that I have that kind of cash
I got the cash, don't worry.
- What?
We've seen where
truth has landed us.
Now let's say what they want to hear
And what's that?
- Oi Jajjan, where's Landmark Hotel?
One whiskey..
- Which one sir?
Imported. How much for a
Black Label? - Four hundred, sir
For a bottle?
- No. 30 ml
Small peg
I'll try an Indian whiskey for a
change. And don't forget the peanuts
Some pretty suave people you
got walking into this Gazal Bar
One Black Label
- Sir
Sir! You here?
Fursatganj! All of Lucknow seems
to be pouring into Kanpur today
Slick! What are you doing here?
- You'll be seeing more of me here
What do you mean?
- My scheme got rocking
Which.. the same one?
- No.. it was unworkable
You tipped me off in time. I
could've wasted another good year
This is another scheme.
- Which is this?
I explained this scheme..
..they offered me a two
per cent stake in the channel
What channel?
- A news channel
News channel
Nowadays this news channel business
is taking off like a rocket
In 3 months, they're giving
investors a 300 per cent..
..return on investment
Cigarette?
- Really?
How much.. is the investment?
- At least 100,000
Won't they take a little less?
I mean, I could invest too?
Why don't you have a chat?
Give me an introduction
This is Mr. Qureishi
- Q.Q. Qureishi
Q.Q. Qureishi, a very dear friend.
Whatever I am
today is because of him
Hello.
- Hello
Mr. Qureishi would like
to invest in the channel
How many millions?
He's not like other investors..
this is just a friendly gesture..
about ten thousand?
- Ten
Ten?
Fifteen?
- Fifteen?
But you're aware, it
should be at least..
Ok, all right, now
how can l refuse you?
One request..
..this remains between us..
let this be our little secret
No, no!
- Promise
We must be in Delhi by morning
So you take the cash from him..
..and fetch us a
receipt from my room. - Okay.
In the meantime, if
he has no objections..
..Mr. Qureishi can give me company
- Yes?
Well?
- No.. l mean no problem
Ten?
Fursatganj, don't forget the receipt
Would you like to dance with me
Mr Q.Q. Qureishi?
Yes, .
You dance really well.
- Thank you
Where's the ladies'?
- Thank you
The washroom.. where is it?
- Bartender, where's the washroom?
Run
What d'you think of my acting?
Better than yours?
Who conned him to your table?
- Who made the sucker dance?
I'd love to see Q.Q.
Qureishi dancing
Hey, the cash
Some sample
Your share.
- You keep it
It's your share.
- Not a gift
Just bank it for me till Bombay.
I can't manage money
We had fun though, no?
Lots..
Move it. Sit in the bus
Passengers for Dehradun and Ambala,
your bus is leaving
Name?
- Bunty
And the Mrs?
Babli
Bunty.. Babli.. seats 21 and 22
Get inside
Bunty.. Babli.. what the hell?
- Nothing.. move on. 21 and 22
What do you mean nothing?
- Sit down, I'll explain
When I was a kid I always blamed
Bunty for all the mischief I did
And we've just stolen money. So..
- But.. what the hell is Babli?
Why, what's wrong? I don't
have a problem with Bunty
You look like your Bunty! But
Babli.. she sounds like a fat slob
Fat or thin, now it's sealed.
- You could've asked me
Ask my wife her name in
front of a bus conductor?
Who are you calling your wife?
- I didn't say that, he thought so
And you let it pass! Now everyone
in this bus thinks I'm Bunty's wife
What are you doing? Everyone
will think Bunty's wife is a shrew
Stop it!
- You stop it
I'm not talking.
- Suits me
Babli, big deal
At least we managed
enough to get us to Bombay
This stash won't
last us a week in Bombay
And?
And.. l think we'll need lots
more if we want to make it in Bombay
Where will we get so much money?
- The same place we got this from
You mean another?
Are you mad? What are you saying?
- I'm not saying a thing. Bunty is
And l'm doing what Bunty's saying?
- Who are you to do? Babli will
Babli?
But I am Babli!
- Sure
You are when you are
You aren't when you aren't
Say, what are you now?
Bunty. You?
Babli?
Babli Bose, Food Inspector.
I'll inspect your kitchen
We hear, the beer
is adulterated here.
Tony, a chilled beer for the sahib
One step, two step, he steps it up
swings it, pumps it, struts his stuff
Meet Bunty
Minute by minute, she turns it up
spins it so you can't get enough
Meet Babli
Spinning like tops,
orchestrating rip-offs..
they'll clean your pockets,
cock a snook and be off
There ain't a legit soul
from who they never stole
When they dig, they dig so deep
you can't get out of that hole
Swings it, pumps it,
struts his stuff Oye Bunty
Bunty Saluja, Tourism department.
Unclean rooms. Got to inspect
Unclean? How many days
of inspection? - Three
She turns it on, spins it so
you can't get enough. Oye Babli
Bunty And Babli
They maybe two..
but they're too much
Bunty Aur Babli.. Bunty and Babli
They maybe two but they're too
much Tough-2-catch, too fast-2-touch
Consider it your's. Take it away..
What model number is this?
- Model number can take a hike!
Why isn't your man back yet?
- What man?
Man.. means husband. - Husband!
What crap. You bloody fool
Love is wild like pigeon wings
Tantrums trip on diamond rings
Don't you blink
You might see their shadows pass
Tea cups clink. Tea cups crash.
Forgive, forget, they have a fight..
wipe their mouths
and take full flight..
come, come, come on, come on,
one step, two step, swing it Bunty
She turns it on, spins it so
you can't get enough. Oye Babli
Bunty Aur Babli.. Bunty and Babli
They maybe two but they're too
much Tough-2-catch, too fast-2-touch
Bunty Aur Babli.. Bunty and Babli
They maybe two but they're too
much Tough-2-catch, too fast-2-touch
Bulandshahr is abuzz with
the amusing misadventures..
of this daring duo who call
themselves Bunty and Babli
People seem to be in awe of
their ingenuity and audacity
Would you like a room or a suite?
No, I don't want just a room
I want the hotel.. we're
here to buy this place
I never thought I'd sell this
place. But your strong background..
and this mind blowing offer..
I'd have to be a lunatic to refuse
How long are you here?
A week maybe..
- Stay here then.. as our guests
This hotel's as good as yours.
We'll discuss
details over the weekend
No, doesn't look good. We can't stay
before we've signed the dotted line
I won't take no for an answer
Well if you insist.. champagne?
Searched every inch of
Mussoorie sir, l can't find them
What do you mean? And their stuff?
- They even stole ours
Damn them
Come away, come away
All our sparkles fly
right across the sky
Then we sight the
morning light Float up high
Witness the magic of Guru'ji
People running after you
like this.. it's a heady feeling
What? - Makes me feels
like I'm an achiever
They walk wrapped in perfume mists
Hold the world in love-locked fists
You won't see them flit about till
they want you to, and when you do..
he slides with a swagger.
- He's Bunty
She glides zig-zagger.
- She's Babli
Their tales are lore.. been
told a score times and more
And will be sung forever more
Their tales are lore.. been
told a score times and more
And will be sung forever more
I can't see any tunnel here..
- We've paid a hundred bucks apiece
Where's that Bunty guide?
Spinning like tops,
orchestrating rip-offs..
they'll clean your pockets,
cock a snook and be off..
there ain't a legit soul
from who they never stole..
and they dig so deep you
can't get out that hole
One step, two step
Swings it, pumps it,
struts his stuff Oye Bunty
She turns it on, spins it so
you can't get enough. Oye Babli
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
They maybe two but they're too
much Tough-2-catch, too fast-2-touch
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
They maybe two but they're too
much Tough-2-catch, too fast-2-touch
I'm so hungry I can't think straight
And you will shut up and eat
whatever's available. No tantrums
Makes you cry?
What's to cry about?
- None of your business
Look, what I meant was you
can't get pizzas out here
All right, I'll get
whatever you feel like
Tell me what you want
Who?
- I want my mummy
But..
Out here?
I miss her
You miss her a lot?
Go on, get it over with
Mummy.
Mummy
Over?
Not over! I'm missing her,
not laying an egg! Over!
What do you miss?
When I was little..
Papa'ji would talk about
taking us for a holiday..
..far away from Pankinagar
But in all my years of waiting, we
never saved up enough for a holiday
You want to send some money home?
Do you want to call them?
Come..
Hello!
No one's saying anything
Then why are you
wasting your breath?
- I don't know why..
I think it's Vimmi
Who's this?
Some nut
Papa'ji
It's me.. Papa'ji
Vimmi, my child..
where did you disappear?
I'm okay Papa, I'm fine
Vimmi my child, where are you?
I can't tell Mummy, but l'm fine
Look dear..
No Papa'ji, don't ask me to come
back now.. I don't want to come back
But I really love both of you
No, my child, listen to me..
- No Papa'ji. I'm hanging up now
I love you both very much
Bye..
You want to call home too?
No
Folks at home must be
worried about you too
No one worries about me
What are you doing here?
Wondering where he's now..
how he's doing
Do you think l was too harsh on him?
You were right in whatever you did
Have your tea, it's
time to go to work
Enough? Satisfied?
If you manage money like this in
Bombay in no time, you'll be back..
in your punk-whatever-town.
- Pankinagar, you bloody idiot
Wherever, but you're finished.
- What's left to count?
You've blown it all up.
I have, have I?
Expensive dresses, shoploads of
makeup just fell out of the sky?
They came from the same place as
your watch, designer shirt, jeans..
and.. this deodorant that
smells like turnip pickle gone bad
They fell off the sky, they did
Now what?
I've been thinking..
Let's.. do it one more time?
- No..
we've pooled enough
to get us to Bombay.
has two kinds of people.
One.. those who
collect enough and those..
who'll never have enough.
Myself and Tata-Birla-Ambanis
are the other kind
That's why they're where they are
today. And once we're in Bombay..
we won't get another chance.
So.. let's take one
last crack. Just once more
You think so?
I know so. So I say so
Who says so? You or Bunty?
- Bunty's always saying so
Today a little of me is with Bunty.
Oye Rakesh.. my sweet bloody idiot
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
They are coming to your town.
They hustle then, they hustle now.
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
Making money all around.
Never do they settle down.
This one.
- No problem
There's just one problem
Just tell me.
- I'm leaving for Mussoorie tonight
Oh, that is a beautiful place
- I know
Tomorrow I have an inauguration.
- Your inauguration?
Not mine.. my hotel's
Oh, I see
Look Mrs..
- Miss..
Miss.. earliest we can deliver
would be by tomorrow morning
It's closing time, you see? And
we can't stay open for one machine
No, no.. not one machine.
- Then?
All.
- All?
But if the mall isn't open..
No.. l'll open up myself.. l mean..
I'll open it up myself for you
Lovely
Sixty thousand
- Sixty thousand
You take cash don't you?
- I take anything you say
Let's shop
Easy brother, easy. The
stuff inside is real precious
Hi!
- Hi!
Sorry for troubling you so much.
You can trouble me
as much as you wish
Please visit our hotel sometime.
- Sure
Your machines are now yours
Here's the balance amount
Thank you very much
- Mention not
May God send customers
like you my way every day
I pray we come by
shops like yours everyday
Driver!
- I have the same..
We seem to share similar tastes.
- I wish we find more in common
Mehmood! Let her rip.
You sound like he's after us already
If he isn't, then he soon will
Oye Bunty, you gave him a licking?
300,000 worth of shades
400,000 in watches
Bunty and Babli.
700,000 in electronic items
Deal
Time for a Chinese lunch. Come
I can't count any more
The incredible
incident at the renowned..
..Center One Mall in Bareilly..
has confounded the police.
Sources say,
..the perpetrators
of this heist are..
Bunty and Babli whose capers have
already made headlines in many cities
Even as investigations proceed..
..by now Bunty and
Babli must be far far away
Tomorrow morning! Bombay.
- That soon?
Before you've brushed your teeth.
This train gets there like a bullet
Good. We can get to work
the minute we get there
You're hunting for the top models?
Like you're
catching your Tata-Birlas
Your share
Always splitting cash at the
drop of a hat? What's with you?
Let's just get it over with,
no? So tomorrow..
you get on with your life,
I'll get on with mine
What'll you do without me? I mean,
on your own.. in Bombay?
Hog the whole bathroom?
You'll have complete freedom too, no?
Nobody will be getting on your nerves
Well you didn't bug me that much.
- Really now?
The way you fought, I would have
to be the meanest man in the world
I can't believe, by
tomorrow morning I'll be in Bombay
All these dreams, all these years..
is everything finally coming true?
Flap your wings, come on let's fly
Flap your wings, let's taste the sky
Flap your wings, come on let's fly
Flap your wings, let's taste the sky
Balle-Balle on a Sundae-Sunday
Balle-Balle
Balle-Balle on a Sundae-Sunday
Balle-Balle
Flap your wings, come on let's fly.
Flap your wings, let's taste the sky
Flap your wings, come on let's fly.
Flap your wings, let's taste the sky
Let's set the
streets of Juliet on fire.
Dance with Romeo in
the streets of desire
We explode with the light
Burn the dance floor, girl
Nach Baliye Dance the Balle..
Want bangles on your wrist, love?
- Nach Baliye
Want jewels in your hair, love?
- Nach Baliye
Run anklets around your feet, love?
- Nach Baliye
Nach Baliye
Give me bangles on my wrist, love
Nach Baliye
Weave jewels into my hair, love
Nach Baliye
Run anklets around my feet, love
Nach Baliye
Get into the groove
on a Sundae-Sunday.
Get into the groove.
Love to watch you baby, turn around
Get into the groove
on a Sundae-Sunday.
Get into the groove.
Round. Round. Round. Round.
The red carpet of dreams
unfurls for us to walk on..
Fate's now a little toy,
to toss, to roll, to rock on
Take your bets now, gamble your life.
Fate's at my feet. Ready to ride?
Then come take my hand, love.
I'll give you the ride of your life.
Then take my hand, love,
give me the ride of my life.
Let's set the
streets of Juliet on fire..
Dance with Romeo in
the streets of desire.
We explode with the light
Burn the dance floor, girl
Dance, buddy.
Want bangles on your wrist, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want jewels in your hair, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want anklets around your feet,
love? - Dance, buddy.
Dance, buddy.
Give me bangles on my wrist, love.
- Dance, buddy.
Weave jewels into my hair, love.
- Dance, buddy.
I want anklets around my feet,
love. - Dance, buddy.
Clap your hands everybody,
everybody just clap your hands
Come on. Dance, buddy.
On a Sunday. Come on. Dance, buddy.
Dance, buddy. Come on. Groove.
Dance, buddy. Dance, buddy. Come on.
On a Sunday.
Day doesn't sink into night here
These roads stay awake, alight here
Tip-toeing upon my eyelids
are dreams that never sleep
Then take my hand, love..
I'll give you the ride of your life
Then take my hand, love.
I'll give you the ride of your life.
Let's set the
streets of Juliet on fire.
Dance with Romeo in
the streets of desire.
We explode with the light.
Burn the dance floor, lad.
Dance, buddy.
Want bangles on your wrist, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want jewels in your hair, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want anklets around your feet,
love? - Dance, buddy.
Dance, buddy.
Give me bangles on my wrist, love.
- Dance, buddy.
Weave jewels into my hair, love.
- Dance, buddy.
I want anklets around my feet,
love. - Dance, buddy.
Bali. Bali.
On a Sundae-Sunday.
Flap your wings, come on, let's fly.
Flap your wings,
let's taste the sky.
Let's set the
streets of Juliet on fire.
Dance with Romeo in
the streets of desire.
We explode with the light.
Burn the dance floor, lad.
- Burn the dance floor, lass.
Dance, buddy.
Want bangles on your wrist, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want jewels in your hair, love?
- Dance, buddy.
Want anklets around your feet,
love? - Dance, buddy.
Dance, buddy.
Give me bangles on my wrist, love.
- Dance, buddy.
Weave jewels into my hair, love.
- Dance, buddy.
I want anklets around my feet,
love. - Dance, buddy.
Train from Delhi to
Bombay is arriving on..
..platform 36 instead of platform 12
Bombay's really crowded, no?
Everyone's here to make
their dreams come true, no?
What's this stench?
Must be fish, no?
Where do you think
fashion shows happen here?
Let's get you into a taxi
And.. you?
I'm going back.
- What!
Look, l don't want to stay
in Bombay. - What do you mean?
I just.. wanted to be really famous.
a name to be reckoned with..
a name in the headlines
Vimmi, for the first
time in my life l think..
..I have a talent no one else has
I realise now, I never was Rakesh.
I've always been Bunty..
I've always enjoyed being him
To tell you the truth, I never
had the perseverance it takes..
to become a Tata or Ambani,
nor the calibre
Anyway, doesn't matter now. I
think I've discovered my destination
And l'm on my way towards it
Look..
this is what I want to do..
all my life, freely
But you please become
a model, a supermodel..
so take care
All this.. you did it all alone?
That's not what l meant.
- Then?
Without you..
- You can't walk one step, you know?
Wants himself in headlines!
Who wants to read about you?
No one's interested in reading
or publishing a Bunty-minus-Babli
Truth is.. without me, you could've
done nothing and you never will
Your taxi..
Tell me.. can you?
Yes
No
Can you live without me?
Yes
Then why are you screaming
taxi-taxi? - Because you need to go
Yes..
- So tell me.. where?
Where you want to go
Who says so?
- You or Babli?
What do you think?
- Must be you
So will you do something about it?
If that's the case then I
must do something about it, no?
What the hell! I didn't mean that
Wasn't me. lt was Bunty.
- Everyone's staring
We're in Bombay.
No one looks at anyone here
Think it over
I won't let you rule
over the bathroom. - Done
No more sleeping alone on
the floor. - Sounds good
What about all the modelling dreams?
That's Vimmi's problem
But you?
I've become Babli
Forever
You know what it's worth?
Not five paise. lt's a fake
Who?
- What?
What's your name?
Mehmood
You're a comedian?
Let's start by making you laugh?
Okay, two jokes for you
One
Mrs and Mr Flea come
out after a matinee show
Mrs Flea says, l'm tired today
Mr Flea says, honey don't worry,
I'll hail us a dog
You are that dog.. the
one they rode for the hike
Now spill it, did you go to
Center One that night or no?
No sir
This here, is my second joke
Where are those two now?
Long time.. gone
Names?
Bunty and Babli
How old are they?
Bunty's around 23-24
Babli is 20-21
She was really sweet, well
mannered and intelligent, sir
Even the boy was
all heart, great guy
That's quite something, sir
No, you asses are quite something
To think that petty criminals..
booked for cheating, misdemeanour,
malfeasance, fraud and perjury..
are quite something
And not just you, the
whole lot of you from..
..this generation is quite something
Right and wrong, good esteem
and bad, good deeds and bad..
you've forgotten
what sets them apart
But I can tell the difference.
And l'm going to teach you fools too
The newspapers say that for boys
and girls in schools and colleges..
these two crooks are role models.
- So they want to be role models?
Fine..
then that's what they'll become..
I'll make them a fine example
of a cure for this generation
What did you say their names were?
- Bunty and Babli
This Bunty-Babli
better watch out for me
We'll always place each
other before ourselves
Okay
We'll never ever
break each other's hearts
And if we do so accidentally..
..we won't burst into
tears without warning
Okay, we will never eat or
drink anything without each other
Except early morning tea
You wake up like a queen at
noon I can't wait that long
We'll give each other the
same amount of love forever
Why? We can give more! I'll
love you even more tomorrow..
more the day after and so much
more the day after the day after
We'll cut off all ties with
those who don't understand us
Except our parents.
- Your parents
We'll be Bunty-Babli
for the rest of our lives
And we'll live out all our dreams.
- Except..
Except?
- Leave that to me
Okay
Oye Rakesh just married!
Look..
right at the outset of this marriage
I want to tell you all about my past
I don't want any issues later
In school, when I was in Class Two,
Mukesh used to sit behind me
He used to tug at my plaits
And you know.. it used to
make me giggle like crazy
These boys are all scoundrels
They'll try their luck
with every cute girl
How true
How lucky I am, you
aren't like those boys
Rakesh.. you're such a good boy
Sweet boy
So.. what I was saying was..
..now that you are my wife..
my mate in joy and sorrow..
for all my days to come..
and nights.. understand?
Asleep? On your wedding night!
This world we live in
has two kinds of people..
those who aren't
married and those who are
So?
So you belong to the latter, no?
So?
So marry me now you fool
Look, above me..
..the sky's soared away.
Look, above me, the
sky's soared away.
I see my skies breaking free
of the earth at the horizon..
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
Look, see what I see,
the earth afloat..
..earth dissolving in water
gushing from who knows where.
Then my sky breaks free of
the earth at the horizon
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
No consciousness of what I am
I have no sense of what I'll be
This time now seems unreal
This can't be happening to me
You slowly dissolve in
me I slowly fade into you
Our feet stop and our paths shift.
The sky rolls over
on its bed of clouds.
The sky will melt and
pelt the earth with rain.
The earth dips its
toes in the water.
It just might stumble to its
feet and start strolling around.
Soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit.
Soft, slow, tip-toeing, love.
Soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit.
Soft, slow, tip-toeing, love.
Say the word, and I stop.
Say the word, and I move.
If this is
obsession that consumes me,
let it set the
yardstick for obsession.
Say the word, and I stop.
Say the word, and I move.
A stranger to my destinations,
I go where you want me to.
Look, above me, the
sky's soared away.
I see the sky breaking free
of the earth at the horizon.
Look, see what I see,
the earth afloat..
..earth dissolving in water
gushing from who knows where.
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
soft, slow, on tip-toe
bit by thieving bit..
soft, slow, tip-toeing my love
Babli is Bunty's and Bunty is Babli's
Each other's forever they'll be
Babli is Bunty's
and Bunty is Babli's.
Each other's forever..
- They'll be
They began their lives.. in small
sleepy towns, towns they detested
So they popped up in big cities
doing the kind of things I detested
Not for poverty, need or
misfortune. Only for fun
Turning to crime for fun? I'd
never ever heard that before
News of Bunty-Babli's capers
poured in from all quarters..
dripping into my ears
like red hot molten iron
Girls and boys in
schools and colleges..
..began to idolize
them as new age heroes
Constantly breathing
down their necks..
..I even started
to think like them..
what next, their next sharp turn?
My hunches were hitting bull's eye..
and I was inching closer to
them with every passing day
They took their infamy for success
and quickly jumped from cons to scams
Scams no one had ever
heard of or imagined before
Okay, how about Kerala?
- Too hot
Manali?
- No, it is too cold
Jaipur?
- It's too dusty
Ladakh?
- It's too lonely, Harry
How many times am I gonna tell you,
it's a damn historical monument..
not a hotel which I can rent
That's your problem Harry,
you said if we came to India..
I could get married wherever
I want. This is what I want
You are impossible
Am I.. I am?
- Yes
Really? Fine!
- Yes
Do you see what I see?
- I'm not blind
Do you hear what I hear?
- I'm not deaf
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
I'm no mind reader. Get to the point
Protesters.. thirty. Taxi drivers?
- Four
School children?
- Twenty. With one teacher
Newspaper?
- Agra Times
Minister's office.
- Very good!
And a wedding bash.
- Oye Rakesh! A first round knockout
I want to marry there Harry,
not put it in my living room
I told you it's not possible Kate
Selling Taj..
- Never, never
Government don't be..
- Clever clever
Selling Taj..
- Never, never
Government don't be..
- Clever clever
Selling Taj..
- Never, never
Government don't be..
- Clever clever
My car.. Mercedes.. Mercedes..
- Mercedes stuck in traffic jam
Students protesting Taj sale.
- What sale?
The Taj is on sale. Sir this
is my Mercedes. Please sit
Please sir.. the
government is selling the Taj.
We won't let them sell it
Extremely sorry sir, I apologise
Today's newspaper sir?
Thank you so much, sir
Is the Taj Mahal really
up for sale? - Yes sir
By who?
By him, sir
Excuse me
Hold on
No sir, it is not possible. We cannot
sell Taj Mahal to a foreigner
Even if the price is high?
No price is too high for Taj Mahal
How about 100 million dollars?
- No sir
150 million.
- No sir
175 million.
- Sir, I told you, it's not possible
200 million.
Well.. 250 million
Why don't you speak with her?
Who?
Phoolsakhi'ji
Who is Phoolsakhi'ji?
Phoolsakhi'ji
Minister in charge of purchase
and selling of the Taj Mahal
Where's the typist?
She's down with viral fever.
We're getting another typist
Get her quickly. - l'll be
in the office all day today
Let's pack in as much
corruption as we can today
Of course.
- The typist is here madam'ji
Sit
My niece's doctoral thesis. I
want it typed out by this evening
Of course, it's me. Go on What..
I'm coming right away
What's the matter ma'am?
- Riot outside my house! Hurry
You keep typing I'll
be back in an hour
How long have you been in
government? - Not very long
And the minister?
- Not very long either
Sir..
You brought the other money?
I can't believe! Someone is
actually selling the Taj Mahal
Nor can I believe!
Someone is actually buying
This ass is going to get kicked
Crowshit on your egghead
He'll be crying for help in two days
How do I look?
- Very fine
How are you madam?
Would you believe l've
been dying to see you?
Madam, this is Mr. Harry Epstein
He wants to buy the Taj Mahal
Exactly
I'm not selling
But madam, we had a deal..
- Why are you late?
But ma'am.. Shut up
So you can't sell
the Taj Mahal to me?
It's all a big mistake
And you have wasted my time
One minute
I said l can't sell the Taj Mahal but
it doesn't mean you can't have it
I don't understand
You can lease it on rent
For how long?
Five years
Ten Ten?
Lease document ready for five.
interested, not interested?
Interested, interested
Why are you protesting?
- Because we have grievances
What grievances?
- Meet our demands or else
What demands?
The revolution..
- Long live the revolution
Never mind that, but
what are your demands?
Down with tyranny
Whose?
- Every tyrant's
Five years
All Harry Epstein's
For a price of 250 million dollars.
- Good doing business with you
And here is your fee 5
million Rupees, cash
Tell me your demands.
- Quit lndia
Quit India, quit India
Quit India? - State your
demands or I'll arrest you
We demand that Ms Kalasakhi..
- But I'm Phoolsakhi!
Tell them!
- You've got the address wrong
She is Ms Phoolsakhi. Now get out.
Okay. Sorry. Fine. Relax. Don't mind
Okay then, goodbye.
- Thank you madam
See you.
- Namaste
Which country are you from?
- Oh, all of them
Your guests should be here soon
Goodbye
What happened to this elevator?
- Could be stuck somewhere
It's coming.
- Let's go
Finished?
- Nearly
It sure is nice of Mr. Bunty to throw
us this wonderful wedding party
And you! Thank you,
it's a dream come true
Not possible
What do you mean not-possible,
I own the Taj Mahal
Is he nuts? He says
he owns the Taj Mahal!
Poor thing, God can
really be cruel sometimes
Open the gate before I
fire you.. dismiss you
Dismiss? He says
he'll get us dismissed
Doctor? You need one?
We call doctor?
No doctor! You talk to Mr. Bunty
He wants some Bunty fellow
What Bunty? Hey wait a
minute are they Bunty and Babli?
So finally you arrive!
They sold the Taj and scooted while
you stood by and watched it happen?
Tomorrow when you sell it
again l'll still be left watching
What!
- Look madam..
a bull doesn't budge until
he sees red in his face..
..and it takes a scam to prod me
into action. l just got the news, no?
That's no way to talk.
- Really? And how did they talk?
Go on, file your report about
descriptions, characteristics
Stop staring at me and do it
No one could've pulled off this
caper without the help of insiders
Who could it be?
- Could've been you, madam
You left her alone in
the room at a perfect time
Corruption happens at the top floor.
But one has to climb
from the ground floor
There's a saying amongst us
policemen. Orderlies make more..
..under the table
See son..
you shouldn't have
gone to the wedding..
..that too in a new car. Getting it?
Hey trumpet.
- Yes sir?
What's the most
requested song nowadays?
Babu'ji, slow it down now
Stand up here
Play
I heard you took an
American to his wedding altar
No sir
I know their names. I
want to know where they are
Harry says, he was so smooth,
and convincing. Harry's no fool
And you believed?
- I did
It was in the Times of lndia.
- All newspapers say..
all Americans have sex
all the day, I believe?
Don't look at it, you
hear me? Don't look at it
Sir how about leaving? What
can we possibly get to know here?
Here you learn to what
lengths a man can go..
..for the smallest of things
Get the serial numbers
of the currency that..
..he withdrew from his bank
Tell me joke
Non-veg
Tired of turning wheels? Now
watch how the wheels of fortune turn
I didn't see a thing. What can
I say? I'm a simple honest man
God! This one turns out to be
honest! Wheel back that car..
go on.. back out..
go away, far away
There. Stop
The longer the distance, the
more it looks like an accident
Don't move or l'll shoot.
- Sir, what are you saying?
I told you! I saw nothing.
- No one's ever seen..
what's about to happen right now
Come on, slam the car.
- No.. please
Slam him. - Please! No.. I saw,
I saw! I saw everything
Turn off the engine
Stand straight
See no evil. Speak no evil. Hear no
evil but if you can profit, grab it
Gandhi'ji would've come
here personally to whack you..
..for being so honest
Who else was in it with them?
Go on, give him every detail
What's wrong? Why are you sulking?
You're upset with me?
Moron, the Taj got sold, not
your taxi. Like some nuts?
No?
- Suit yourself
There was no corner of the country
Bunty and Babli hadn't been to
And every newspaper was
cheering their ingenuity
But I was dying to
see them behind bars
No there's no
mistake about this order.
Your assignment is being changed
But I've completely
committed myself to the case
Bunty-Babli's case is being
assigned to the federal agencies
To whom?
- Federal investigation
God
Our politicians have become honest?
The feds have time
for Bunty and Babli?
They have your sympathies?
- Not those two
My sympathies are with the feds.
- You think the feds can't get them?
Why?
- Because they can't think like them
And you can?
I'm beginning to feel
we're related somehow
From tomorrow, you're taking
charge of the gold at the airport
Very well sir
You're the boss
I'll take charge of
hell if you want me to
Anyway what's the score?
- What?
I found myself a
night-watchman's job.
This is how I got to bide my time
Dashrath Singh..
If there's anybody who'll lay a
finger on Bunty and Babli, it's me
You find this funny? You can
do this yourself the next time
I won't be able to do
this even if I tried, love
But you can make a
mockery of those who do?
Ok, I'm sorry - What idiot
could've made you a father
You
One rum, large
You don't need to pay sir
Did I mention I'm a policeman?
- Hear me out, sir
The gentleman out there is
hosting food and drinks..
..for all guests tonight
Who?
- The man in black
They're buying this restaurant
No way. We're picking up
the tab for everyone tonight
Not tonight. Tomorrow
From tomorrow, this hotel is
yours to do as you please.
But tonight's on me
Friends, cocktails and
dinner for everyone on the house
Vodka
- Yes Sir.
Vodka.
Whiskey
Cocktail?
- Sir.
Gin
- Okay.
Gin.
Rum
Flying to the moon?
You're selling the tickets?
You've just bought
yourself a one-way ticket
I don't believe much in
buying tickets but yes..
..I do want to fly to the moon
You're a man in a hurry?
Somewhat
There's this one place in
which men-in-a-hurry usually end up
You see..
- What?
This world we live in
has two kinds of people
I see.
- One, the kind that listens
And the kind that talks.
I belong to the latter
So sure of yourself?
What do you do? - Cleaning
I'm in the cleaning business.
We clean out places
What kind of places?
- Any kind
So you like tidy places?
- No, I like tidy sums of money
Interesting man. Where
are you from? - Allahabad
Aha, you look that type
Sir, one more large?
Bring it on then
What's happening here?
You're smoking in front of your
baby? - How the hell can he see me?
Babies know everything.
- How can they know everything?
Stop it
I get the feeling l'm her baby
And he who is he?
I.. am..
- He is..
Whoever, doesn't matter. Come on
Women.. are like this only. -
How and how do you think women are?
Oye, don't stoke my anger.
- Hello, what's happening here?
A fight can't you see?
- That I can, but why?
Private matters of husband-wife!
How meddlesome
Please stub that out
You look like a long lost father!
Ought to be setting
an example for him
And you better come along. I'm
checking out the rooms in this hotel
Don't take too long
Don't come back in an hour or two.
Spoilt the mood for
no rhyme or reason
You seem to be much fallen-in-love
You've never fallen.. in love?
Once, a little
What?
A little
In a summer of Delhi I came upon her
Every single day on bus number 481 ..
I would fall all over myself
to vacate the ladies' seat..
and she would sit down
with the sweetest smile
For a whole year..
- You never spoke?
When our eyes were saying so much
how could words dare to interfere?
But..
I can shower her
with gifts, can't l?
So every week, I'd fall over
myself to give her my gift
And she..
- Would smile?
And take it
- Yes.
And l'm sure that one day, in return
for all my gifts she would give me..
that one big gift I've been waiting
for. - So did the gift arrive?
Winter arrived
On the 21st of December..
wrapped in a maroon
shawl and a warm smile..
she stepped into the bus. Radiance
on her face and in her hands..
a Golden Bakery box.
Inside that box..
were the world's most
beautiful heart shaped.. you know..
heart-shaped pastries
Wow!
- Yes.
And then for the
first time in a year..
she spoke her first words to me
Please..
would you distribute these
pastries to all the passengers
I just got engaged
Sorry.
Ei handsome
- Yes!
What happened?
She's calling you
Who is?
Tonight's your night
Those pangs you feel in
your heart have pained me too
Why not drown our pains tonight?
Nice
Rare are those moments
in life when desire calls
Come into my arms, or
come and slit my throat
Oh forget it..
this give and take of
hearts takes a lot of heart..
and doing it so boldly for the world
to see.. it's a woman's art you see
In this winning and losing
of hearts what are men worth?
His ruthless gaze..
tore up the street.. took me apart
It ran a razor's edge down
the willing side of my heart
Wow! Wow!
I fall to restless pieces..
don't look at me that way
I fall to restless pieces,
don't look at me that way
A townful of men in ruin
surrenders to what I say
I fall to restless pieces,
don't look at me that way
A townful of men in ruin
surrenders to what I say
I stretch with desire,
I take my bow
I stretch with desire..
come touch me now
Night eyes..
night eyes.. your night eyes..
The moon sleeps
inside those night eyes
Night eyes, your night eyes
Night falls inside those night eyes
These sighs you swore,
wrote them in kohl
Come to life inside these eyes
That kiss you left
on my handkerchief
I knot it until it dies
Oh your words are
wisps from incense bowls
You waft in lazy
like the warm wind rolls
Oh your words are
wisps from incense bowls
You waft in lazy
like the warm wind rolls
I bow, I stretch.. come touch me
I stretch with desire,
I take my bow
night eyes.. your night eyes..
Night eyes, my night eyes
You're a shadow inside my night eyes
night eyes.. your night eyes..
Ask private questions, brook no lies
Hide under those veil-like lids
The curtains behind which she shies
No curtains hide my pain,
no lies try to guard me
I bow, I stretch.. come touch me
I stretch with desire, I take my bow
night eyes.. your night eyes..
You are mine in the
memories of old stone cities
Our songs still echo
in those forlorn cities
From the south gate arch to
where the north gate lies..
you and I are lore
set in stone cities
I hear the call of
the saint on the wall
And swear by the
black beauty of your eyes
I'm the guardian from
evil your eyes never had
I'll suffuse them with
smiles so they never look sad
Oh your words are
wisps from incense bowls
You waft in lazy
like the warm wind rolls
Oh your words are
wisps from incense bowls
You waft in lazy
like the warm wind rolls
Come touch me, oh
touch me, oh touch me now
night eyes.. your night eyes..
I love the way you sway
Madam, I am your only Adam
Night eyes.. oh the dark
of her nights in my eyes
Why do you dole out free drinks?
Why give free drinks, you fool!
How will you run your hotel?
Anyway..
I enjoyed your company
I feel satisfied
and a little in love
And it helped me forget those two
Forget them.. you've nothing
to do with those scoundrels
Generally..
I don't take to strangers too well
But I don't know..
I don't know why
the two of you have..
..touched my heart
We've done what?
- Touched my heart..
you could've been my children
You haven't told us your name.
- You haven't told..
My name is Dashrath
Dashrath Singh, Deputy
Commissioner of Police
You're a police' wallah?
What did you think? Balloon' wallah?
Why what's come over you?
What's it?
- Rickshaw' wallah..
Sit in the rickshaw
Go on, take him home.
- Yes, take me home
It's very late.
- Very late at night
Take me to the airport..
no not there
I'm going to Police Lines.
- Go on, quick
Oh my God, the very same Dashrath
Singh the one who's been after us?
My baby almost had a heart attack!
That was close, let's get out of here
Get out? The fun's only just begun
- What are you talking about?
Look, he never knew what we look
like. He still doesn't. But now..
we know who he is
and we also know that..
he's in charge of the security
of the gold stashed at the airport
By God! You are..
- Vimmi, if we don't..
steal the meat right
from the lion's den..
what did we achieve?
- Your hunger's getting out of hand
Now we're a threesome. We'll
need more food.. what do you say?
You'll get us killed someday
India's Central Bank doesn't
keep its gold in any one place
To protect the gold from fires,
floods or earthquakes..
the cache is split
over four different cities
Depending on the requirements
of various banks..
this gold is shuttled by air between
these four cities once every week
How they cracked this confidential
information, they haven't divulged
But what they did that day no
one could have ever imagined
Not even me..
Delhi-Mumbai, 9.10 pm tonight.
Korpal, Puneet, Mr.
And Delhi-Calcutta, 9.40 pm.
Sharma, Vandana, Mrs.
What's this other ticket for?
- Backup
-=MTR=-
Why the Air Traffic Control number?
- Backup
A back up for everything? Oye
Rakesh, is there one for you too?
Yes
- Who?
You
Smart
Call back the Jet airways flight
to Mumbai. The bomb is ticking
What nonsense. A bomb on the plane?
Jet 9W312. Yes Delhi Control?
Turn back and proceed for
landing on emergency runway number 2
There is a bomb scare
Delhi Control is this a joke?
Bomb on board, he says
Jet 9W312. Turning back
The caller's number. Get it now
Go get the number from them. Now!
We can't have the number
It isn't under ourjurisdiction.
- As long as the gold is on board..
this plane, the bomb, this airport,
everything is under our jurisdiction
How many people knew about
the gold? - Four bank employees
Are you implying the news was
leaked? - Give me the key to the box
But we are not permitted to
open it. - Give me the key
Now it's your responsibility. - The
bomb might explode any time, sir
The bomb has exploded.
Send message to headquarters.
I am assuming command
DCP Dashrath Singh here..
Surround the airport area
Locate persons who do not have
any reason to be here at this hour
Take suspects into
custody and inform immediately
They received the bomb
scare from this number
Dial
Ringing
Orange Maruti Swift 5700
Vimmi we'll have to ditch
this car. They've spotted it.
Get out
Stop.. taxi
Stop.. please
Papa'ji, please help us!
I'll give you more money
than you ever imagined
Son, for this job, I won't take
money even if you give it to me..
come my child, get up,
you'll do fine
Have faith in god. Faith prevails
Sir, what are you saying?
Policemen in every
hospital and nursing home?
We won't have men
for policing the city.
She's in labour.
She's about to deliver
Every child born in Delhi
tonight will see a policeman's face..
before anything else
That Dashrath Singh figured me out.
How are you so sure?
I know.
I saw it in his eyes..
Then..
in no time every hospital in Delhi
will be crawling with policemen
Which hospital do
you want to go to son?
The biggest.. the
biggest hospital in Delhi
Not a hospital or nursing home,
they'll go to a nondescript clinic
If l know that Bunty..
..he'll definitely take
Babli to the biggest hospital
Vimmi, don't be afraid
This hospital is packed choc-a-bloc
with newborns and their mothers
It'll take them ages to check
each bed. But you please hurry it up
It isn't in my hands, bloody idiot!
I told you you'll
get us killed someday
Hush
But hey, what life did I
have before I met you?
Is everything all right?
- Yes
Papa'ji.. if you
weren't here today..
There would have been someone else
The Lord up there runs a
regular courier service
He always provides for ones in need
Those two have fled the hospital
but they haven't fled Delhi yet
Seal Delhi, sir
Papa'ji, all that
you've done for us..
One honest man would do for another
Papa'ji, you're kidding me
By now you must have figured that
we aren't half as honest as we seem
I don't know what you've done to
make these people hunt you down..
but I see a simple
honesty in your eyes..
..take care son
God bless you.
For the next week or so
they'll be baying for our blood
We'll return afterwards.. but
where have you hidden the gold?
What's your baby, a boy or a girl?
What will you name your baby?
Before you think of a name you
need to see the baby at least?
A day has gone by, have you
even taken one look at your baby?
Did you hold your child in
your arms, even once.. once even?
Vimmi, you know we didn't
have any time for these.
Had l stopped for all this..
all three of us would've
either been jailed or killed by now
Some reason for celebration!
The day he is born.. his parents die
Cursed fate to be born with!
- Not his fault, is it?
That's what I'm saying!
What wrong has he done..
to deserve parents who
can go to jail anytime..
leaving him to rot on the streets
What are you trying to say?
- Enough
I won't do this anymore.
Neither will you..
Then what else can we do?
Anything, whatever
everyone else does
If we had to end up doing
what everybody else does..
why did we ever run away from home?
Because we were wrong
Now we're not free
to live as we like.
Now we're
responsible for one more life
How's he going to grow up?
How? With us..
..that's how With us?
And which school will he go to
You know this world we live in
has two kinds of people. One..
who waste the best years of
their lives in schools and colleges.
And the kind who school themselves.
Like us. We taught us
to do what we're doing
Which is what he'll learn?
- Of course!
And then he'll go to jail someday?
Have we ever been to jail?
We very nearly got thrown into jail
I don't want my son
growing up behind bars..
or dying young on the run
Do you remember agreeing on
all our marriage vows except..
We'll be Bunty-Babli
for the rest of our lives
And we'll live out all our dreams.
- Except..
Except?
- Leave that to me
Okay
This is the exception Rakesh
You're getting over-emotional
about this motherhood business
But now l am whatever l am.
Now I want to hear your decision
Choose. lt's either this life..
or a life together
So what have you decided?
What'll I do without the two of you?
Those marriage vows
weren't mere words
Fursatganj or Pankinagar?
Is it you that's saying this or?
Bunty and Rakesh. Both
What?
- Tickets
Since when are we buying tickets?
- From today
Why become so damn honest?
Oye Rakesh, you're in love
Oh all right
Rakesh my boy, this world we
live in has two kinds of men. One..
the kind that thinks
twice before getting married
And the kind that thinks
afterwards like you, you idiot
Two tickets for Fursatganj
Name?
Rakesh Trivedi, Vimmi Trivedi
Bunty and Babli
You've had a long run.
You must be tired
Rakesh.
Can we have some water?
Die of thirst dog!
Not for me. For the two of them
You won't believe me..
..but we quit being
crooks half an hour ago
Absolutely right, I
won't believe you.
- But if l insist
I'm telling the truth?
I'll start doing right now what I
had planned to do to you in jail
Why are you looking at me like
that? - He's telling the truth
Guaranteed by you,
India's biggest bonafide liar?
I'm not lying
A dog's tail insists it became
ramrod straight half an hour ago?
You're as old as my father..
..no one's had the cheek
to talk to her like that
So you respect your elders now,
do you? - And why shouldn't we?
Now don't tell me you pray
first thing every morning too!
She does
So?
- So what!
Now you pray to your
heart's content in jail!
It's all your fault now suffer.
- My fault?
Who's idea was it to go straight?
- It was for a good cause..
do you want your son to go to jail?
- So where's he going now?
Now I see how the two of you
have been fooling people for years
Pappu is hungry
Pappu? When did we
start calling him Pappu?
Got to call him something no?
You're thinking of
the gold all the time
Let's step outside for a while
I'm not going anywhere.
- Up
Darned luck. No one ever caught
us when we were in the thick of it
But the moment we quit..
Why did you get into all this?
I wanted to become
someone important.
And.. you became?
You won't understand.
- Why..
why won't I understand?
Because he never did.
- Who?
My father
He's just like you
You're trying to con me again
May l?
- A smoke? Sure..
Where are you going?
If she sees me smoking she'll scream
The child will stay with the mother
What's the use of crying now?
Should've considered this
beforehand. - What else to do?
Become a ticket collector and
collect ten rupee bribes all my life?
You can come in
We'll have to make a phone
call to your home or mine
We certainly can't take him with us.
No, it won't come to that
I'll figure something.
And con ourselves
out of this one too?
What else to do?
Take with me to jail..
..the very son for whose
sake I gave up everything?
What justice!
Jails are for reforming.
And here, three
people are being jailed
Two of whom have reformed and a
third who's completely innocent
Don't worry Vimmi.
I'll crack a plan.
- What plan Rakesh?
We've run out of plans
Vimmi do you have any
idea what jails are like?
How will you spend so
many years inside one?
Let's do something, l'll
take the blame for everything
Then you're free to go home
to Fursatganj with the baby
All you wanted was to become a model
I dragged you into this whole thing
You can't even make a
cup of tea for yourself.
In jail.. how?
- I'll manage Vimmi..
..don't worry about me
Have you ever managed
to do anything alone?
In any case, Bunty is
nothing without Babli
Get up
Unlock yourselves..
I can't do it..
We're nearing the railway
signal on the outskirts of Delhi
The train halts
there for two minutes
The two of..
the three of you can get
off and go wherever you wish
No one recognises
Bunty and Babli except me
And no one ever will
Sir..
- Shut up. Not a word
Or l just might change my mind
Get going
That's enough
Whether it was my
life's biggest mistake..
..or their best con act,
I didn't know
But policemen are human too,
believe it or not..
we wear those
uniforms only on our body,
..at heart we're as
vulnerable as babies
I believed I had
destroyed Bunty-Babli,
so l let Rakesh and Vimmi go..
because l think the law
needs to destroy crime, not lives
The bank's gold was recovered
from the spot Babli had indicated
The recoveries continued
for months afterwards..
monies and valuables
stolen by Bunty and Babli
I think they had told me
the truth about going back..
to live respectable,
honest lives like their parents
Rakesh'ji could you
perhaps increase the pressure
What a joy
This world we live in has
two kinds of Pappus. One..
the kind who obey their
parents and get to eat chocolates
and the kind that doesn't and
gets locked up inside toilets
You are?
- The first
My darling baby
But he didn't even drink his milk.
He'll eat the chocolate
What good are chocolates?
You and your fads
No, I'm feeling cold..
- Forget the cold. Be fashionable
What are you teaching Pappu?
To speak the truth
and pray every morning
Where's my son? One of his
friends is waiting downstairs
Friends and folks in
Fursatganj find all the time for fun
You fix the name of this city.
I'll fix this friend
My son is genius from..
childhood
I am very lucky
I got a daughter-in-law
who is very very smart
It's such a joy to know
that our son and his wife..
..have done things..
so important that your
department still remembers them
Never told folks at home
what all you achieved?
Maybe you should tell us
Nervous already?
A scam is in the offing
Huge scam
Sir..
I swear by my son, l've given it up
I've no idea of what
scams are happening
For three years now, I'm
following a work-home-work routine
This scam has got to be stopped.
- Then go ahead and stop it
We cannot stop it
Who else can?
You
Please save us from this life of
honesty and respectfulness. Please.
Is it just you, or..
- Both of us.
I'd choose death over
making mango pickle.
I'd rather die, Rakesh.
Have faith in God. Faith prevails.
One step, two steps,
he steps it up, swings it
pumps it, struts his stuff.
Meet Bunty.
Minute by minute,
she turns it up, spins it
so you can't get enough. Meet Babli.
Swami.. Bunty Ramaswami.
Mandalam.. Babli Cholamandalam.
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
They maybe two,
but they're too much.
Once upon a time he told me that
he was in the business of cleaning
So l put them on the job
of cleaning up society
Bunty Aur Babli Bunty and Babli
They maybe two,
but they're too much.