Bride & Prejudice (2004) - full transcript

Oh.

This is the conveyor belt?

Wait, wait, wait.

Balraj, get the other one.

Lalita!
And check this one.

I'll just check that one.

This is mayhem.
This is, like, bedlam.

It's good, isn't it?

What do you mean, it's
a little bit like New York?

Better get used to it, Darcy.
We're here for two weeks.

Jesus, Balraj, where the hell
have you brought me?



Hurry up, you silly girls.

We must make sure Jaya meets
this Mr. Balraj from London,

before anyone else.

All mothers think that any
single guy with big bucks

must be shopping for a wife.

I'm embarrassed to say it,
but I hope he is.

What, shopping
or loaded?

Well... both.

Lakhi, you think your
mother has gone crazy

that I'm letting
you wear that?

I told you, Lakhi.
It's very vulgar.

But Mama,
it's killing, Mama.

Ooh, it's killing.

It's what everyone's
wearing in Mumbai.



But we want Balraj
to look into Jaya's eyes,

not your mammies!

She's our only hope.

If we do not get
the elders married first,

we'll never be able to marry
rest of you for the shame!

Come on, Lakhi.
It's only a party.

Save your fussing for
the big wedding tomorrow.

Papa, just chill.
I have to fix my dupatta.

Oh-ho.

Hi, Lakhi!

Hi.

- Lakhi.
- Hello.

Can we sit here?

Please do.

Mama, we go and
see the bride, OK?

Chandra, don't be too long.

Oh, this must be the
famous Balraj from UK.

He's from the Uppal
family of Delhi, you know.

Hey, Balraj.

You've waded a long
piece from London.

Is that his name?
I completely forgot

groom is bringing
guest from England.

Apparently,
he's a barrister.

Is that right?
A barrister?

And his family
live in Windsor,

near the queen's castle.

Really? Next to the queen?

Oh, his sister is looking
so lovely, so fair, no?

Who is that Englishman with him?

He's American.
His name is William Darcy.

He was Balraj's
fast friend at Oxford.

From one of the richest
families in America.

They own hotels
all over the world.

Shame he's not Indian, though.

You sure you're OK
about going away to London?

You only met him twice.

He's nice and so is his family.

You need to get out
of this town, Lalita.

You know there's
nothing for you here.

All the guys just want
girls from rich families.

Papa needs me.
I couldn't leave.

His friend Balraj is great.

He's looking for a
girl too, you know.

Good Lord, is it me, or is every
woman over 50 giving you the eye?

Don't be dense, Darcy.

Every mother in this room is
wetting her knickers for him

for their daughters.
Can we leave yet?

Kiran, I'm his best man.
I can't just bail out on him, can I?

It's 10 a.m. in New York. I wouldn't
mind getting back just a little early

so I can go through the
financials in a hotel and go...

Will you stop working
just this once?

And you stop being
such a coconut.

This is our dear, dear
Motherland. Enjoy it.

The only thing India's
good for is losing weight.

Are you sure this is safe to eat?

I don't wanna be getting
Delhi Belly on my first day.

What's happening now?

The Indian version
of American Idol.

- I hope you brought your earplugs.
- This is great.

This is where the girl sees the
boys and the boy sees the girls.

Brace yourself, Darcy.

He's about to transform
into the Indian MC Hammer.

What are they like?

What are they saying?

"Oh, these pretty girls
fluttering temptingly,

like kites without string."

"These girls are like naked live wires.

If you get too close, you'll
get an electric shock of love."

Ugh.

Oh, my gosh.

There's still time.
Ha-ha-ha.

That-That was fantastic.
Very good.

Come on. Come on.

Come on.
The two of you dance.

Thank you.

Darcy, what are you doing?

The drawstring
keeps coming undone.

I don't know why you
made me wear these pants.

Why don't we just
alert the media?

She's too outrageous.

I'm telling you, she'll
give us all a bad name.

You know she is spending
all night texting boys?

Lakhi, stop right now.
Lakhi.

Good evening, sir.
We're from the groom's side.

We'd like to introduce
ourselves, if we may.

- I'm Balraj, this is my sister Kiran...
- Hi.

- and my very good friend, William Darcy.
- Hello.

Very nice to meet you all.

- Sir.
- I am Shamin Bakshi.

May I introduce
my family to you?

This is my wife,
Mrs. Manorama Bakshi,

and these are my daughters,
Jaya, Lalita.

That's Lakhi
and that's Maya.

Good Lord,
four daughters in one family.

God has blessed you
four times over.

Such a pleasure to make
your fine acquaintance.

Ahem.

Would you do me the honor?

- Papa?
- Of course, of course. Please, please.

Darcy, why don't you ask one of
Jaya's lovely sisters to dance as well?

No. I'm sorry, I can't.

I must get back and work.
I have a conference call.

But it's easier than you think.
I can show you...

No, I... really can't.
Maybe another time.

Rich American.
What does he think?

We are not good
enough for him?

You should have seen
Mrs. Lamba's face.

Balraj didn't dance with
any other girl all night.

I knew he wouldn't
be able to resist

my pretty Jaya's charms.

Or yours, I'm sure.

Just imagine if Jaya
went to live in UK.

We could visit her anytime.

I would hate to have my
daughters be so far away.

But we have so many.

One or two can go abroad.
They'll earn more.

God knows, they'll need to,
'cause we can't afford

to give them all
decent dowries.

Perhaps we should have drowned
one or two at the time of their birth.

We wouldn't have had these problems if we
had gone to U.S. when we had the chance.

Did I tell you about this Indian fellow
who went to America and made it rich?

My brother did all the paperwork to sponsor
us, but no, you didn't want to leave.

This fellow went to America and
bought this huge American house

and built three swimming
pools in the garden.

Now he owns three Subway
franchises in New Jersey,

and what do we have?
Ha-ha.

An old house, an old farm

- and new bills.
- So when his father visited from India,

he showed him around his mansion
and three swimming pools.

His father asked, "But, son,
why do you need three pools?"

So he said proudly, "Well, one is filled
with cold water for when I feel hot.

The second is filled with
hot water when I feel cold."

The father nodded and said,
"Why is the third pool empty?"

He said, "Well, that's when I
don't feel like swimming at all."

Listen, Balraj, if you
really wanna get married,

why don't you just hook up with some
Indian girl from England, or even America?

At least you'd have
something in common.

I didn't have any problems
talking with Jaya, did I?

She's intelligent,
she's beautiful.

Come on, Bal,
look around you.

You said it yourself, man.
We're in Hicksville, India.

Then why did I see you
eyeing up Lalita?

She's beautiful,
yeah, but...

But... not your mom's idea of
the mother of her heirs, right?

Not exactly, no.

Bye.

Give me that bag.

- Why?
- Forget it. I wanna go over there.

- Come, I wanna go to that one.
- Just give me the bag.

♪ Is this going to be

♪ The last time we three

♪ Walk down
this street together?

♪ She's going to be wed

♪ It doesn't mean she's dead

♪ We'll be friends forever

♪ It's not long before the day

♪ I up, up, up and fly away

♪ So let's make this
a walk to remember

♪ There are stars in your way

♪ From Amritsar to UK

♪ There are stars in your way

♪ From Amritsar to UK

♪ You are the golden girl,
the center of the world

♪ Just ask,
and you shall have it

♪ This is your moment,
grab it

♪ Your wish is our command

♪ We'll supply what you demand

♪ You've turned
their lives around

♪ You got
a marriage into town

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound

♪ Life is great,
let's celebrate

♪ The sacred union
two souls have found

♪ Oh

♪ Oh

♪ You see, flowers
are most important

♪ Bright colors
can never be forgotten

♪ No one can
be at your wedding

♪ With a bad taste
in their mouth

♪ So we will supply
the rasamali

♪ The guests
won't leave without ♪

Look at that.
Come on.

Hurry up.Ah...

♪ Fancy pearls
and precious stones

♪ Imported from far and wide

♪ We'll melt and mold
and set for hours

♪ 24-carat bride

♪ The color, clarity

♪ The best you ever seen

♪ Only the Kohinoor
is better

♪ But you'll have to ask
the queen

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound

♪ Life is great,
let's celebrate

♪ The sacred union
two souls have found

♪ Life and all
its intricacies

♪ We'll paint
on your hands and feet

♪ The color of mud

♪ Shows the heat in the blood

♪ Oh

♪ And eyes the earth
and all her fertility

♪ We'll darken your lifeline

♪ To deepen with time

♪ Adding soul to the magic

♪ That is to be

♪ Your life
and all its intricacies

♪ Who can tell you more
about yin and yang?

♪ Sharing one spirit
between woman and man

♪ Marriage is the path
taken by he and she

♪ May your new life
be kissed by harmony

♪ It seems they had nothing
in their lives before today

♪ And why are they so happy
to give a daughter away?

♪ You got what
you always wanted

♪ And for that, I am glad

♪ But just take a look
around you

♪ The city has gone mad

♪ Can't wait for the day

♪ Can't keep
our shoulders down

♪ God bless you for getting

♪ This marriage into town

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound

♪ Life is great,
let's celebrate

♪ The sacred union
two souls have found

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound ♪

Hi, hi.
They look sizzling, no?

Jaya should grab him right away,
seduce him before he leaves.

Give him a little taste so he
comes begging back for more.

And what makes you
such an expert, huh?

Mmm, I know enough to know
that if that damn cute Darcy

was looking at me the way he's looking
at you now, I wouldn't ignore him.

You're nuts, Chandra.

God, is he coming up?

- Lalita...
- Huh?

Marry him,
divorce him right away,

then give me half.

Someone's having
some fun up here.

Hope it's not my tie, is it?

- No. We're just jok...
- Excuse me.

Someone's thinking of you.
I'm off to get a Coke. Bye.

- What'd she say?
- It's just an old saying.

We say whenever you sneeze,
it means someone's thinking of you.

It was probably my lawyer.

Can't get any work done
in the hotel I'm in.

- Which hotel's that?
- It's the Diyan International.

That's the best
hotel in town.

Oh. But their computer
system keeps crashing,

the electricity goes.

I don't know how
business functions here.

Are you a barrister
like Balraj?

No, no, no. My family's
in the hotel business.

I'm sure Amritsar's
hotels can't compare,

but I bet there's
a slight price difference.

How much does it cost
to stay in one of your hotels?

A good room, about
$400-$500 a night.

Ha! That's more than what
most people make here in a year.

Well, that's pretty bad
when you put it like that,

but people who can afford it,
they want the best.

There's nothing wrong with
having standards, is there?

No, as long as you don't
impose them on others.

This is your first
Indian wedding, right?

Mm, yeah.

It's been an experience.

- You're not enjoying it?
- No, no, I am.

I just find the whole arranged-marriage
thing a little strange.

I don't really know if
two people can get married

that don't really
know each other.

It's a little backward,
don't you think?

That's such a cliché.
It's different now.

It's more like a
global dating service.

The groom looks pretty happy.

Did his parents
force him into it?

No, he asked his parents
to find him a bride, actually.

He was busy
running his company.

He just wanted it
to be simple.

I see, and so he came here.
Is that what you think, too?

That India is the place to go
for simple women?

- That's not what I meant.
- It's funny.

Americans think they've got the answers
for everything, including marriage.

Pretty arrogant considering they've got
the highest divorce rate in the world.

What I was trying to say is that he
wanted a bride who was traditional and...

Darcy! Stop boring her to death
and come and get down with us.

Listen, uh, I'm a
hopeless dancer, but...

this looks like you screw in
a light bulb with one hand,

you pet the dog
with the other.

Will you teach me?

You know what?

I think you should find someone
simple and traditional

to teach you to dance
like the natives.

We're all flying
down to Goa tomorrow.

Darcy's looking into a
hotel he may acquire.

Mr. Bakshi, we'd love for Jaya
to join us as our guest.

How nice.
A hotel in Goa.

Mr. Balraj, I'm not sure
if it would be appropriate

to let Jaya go on her own.

- Oh, I understand.
- Don't be silly, dear.

It's so kind of you
to invite Jaya.

Perhaps her sister
can accompany her.

- I think I can go to Goa.
- Lakhi, you're too young.

I think Lalita should
accompany her sister.

- But, Papa...
- Don't be a silly girl.

Go and have fun
with your sister.

Sure, I'd love
to come with Jaya.

Wonderful. I'll send the
driver over in the morning.

- Good night to you all.
- Good night.

- And good night, yes.
- Bye-bye.

- Good night.
- Good night.

Have you gone crazy,
old man?

This is Jaya's chance to
win him once and for all.

And he'll get to see
her in a swimsuit.

Are you crazy?

Hello.

What's this? Oh.

Thank you.

Ma'am, your Sea Breeze.

- Oh, thanks.
- Ma'am.

Darcy, darling, will you tear yourself
away from the love of your life

and put some lotion on my back?
I don't wanna get too dark.

I'm writing to my
little sister Georgie.

Oh, my God. You lugged
that all this way?

That explains why you haven't
got much room for outfits.

Do you have something
against books,

or do you resent them because they leave
less room in your bag for your makeup?

No. No, I just never
have time for them.

Indians here have
a lot more free time.

Or maybe you're a much more
accomplished woman than I am.

Mm-hmm, maybe.

Darcy's a great reader.

In fact, I think
a love of books

is on his list for
his ideal woman.

I think you've had one
too many Sea Breezes.

I clearly remember a very drunken night
in Oxford when you recited the list.

Let me see, she has to be smart,
speak several languages...

- Kiran, drop it.
- No. I recall she had to be athletic...

voluptuous, of course,

graceful, witty, confident.

I'm not surprised Mr. Darcy hasn't found
his ideal woman with a list like that.

Does this mean
you're an ideal man?

Well, I guess you'd be
a better judge of that than me.

As far as I can tell,
most men have faults.

Arrogance,
pride, vanity.

She certainly read you
like a book, Darcy.

No.

I just think you
got me all wrong.

Well, you'd certainly have trouble
finding your ideal woman in India.

I didn't hear simple, traditional,
subservient on your list.

Come on, gimme a break.
Now you're twisting my words.

You said yourself that
you're used to the best.

I'm sure you think
India's beneath you.

If I really thought that,

then why would I be thinking
about buying this place?

Ha-ha. You think
this is India?

Don't you wanna see
more investment, more jobs?

Yes, but who does it
really benefit?

You want people to come to India
without having to deal with Indians.

Oh, that's good.

Remind me to add that
to the tourism brochure.

Isn't that what
all tourists want here,

five-star comfort with
a bit of culture thrown in?

Well, I don't want you turning
India into a theme park.

I thought we got rid of
Imperialists like you.

I'm not British.
I'm an American.

Exactly.

40 acres on this side, sir.

What the hell's
he doing here?

Oh, my God.

Hello.

♪ Enter in the dance,
plug it in, and we begin

♪ Crowd up in the center

♪ They watch, be dibidim

♪ Watch the way we drop it
in a mix timin'

♪ Rise and amplifyin',
then we come in with the swing

♪ Just followin' the back
and naturally harmonizin'

♪ Climb into position
with synchronized things

♪ Live from out the ghetto,
we maximizin'

♪ Sound of the Groove Armada,
we super stylin'

♪ We super stylin'

♪ We super stylin'...

Hello again.

Hey.

How are you?

Fine, thanks.

- Can I join you?
- Sure.

- Would you like a drink?
- No, thanks.

- I'm not much of a drinker.
- Well, then neither am I.

I've been drinking out here 'cause
it's cheaper than the water.

I'm Johnny, by the way.
I'm Johnny Wickham.

Pleased to meet you, Johnny.
I'm Lalita.

Lalita.

How do you know Will Darcy?
I saw you two blank each other.

I was gonna go over
and say hi to the guy,

but then I realized I'd
have to talk to the wanker.

We sort of grew up
together 'cause...

my mum used to work for
Darcy's family in England.

She was his nanny.

See, their family had a couple
of big, old country hotels...

Mm-hmm.

Dad was a really keen...
well, Darcy's dad was a really keen golfer,

and I used to caddy for him.

Really nice old fella.

Gave me a great job
when I left school, and...

I don't know,
Darcy was never too keen.

So when the old man
died a few years back,

you can guess who was
the first one to get fired.

Just like that?

With his dad gone, he didn't
have to explain, did he?

- But your mum helped raise him.
- Yes, she did.

You know, Darcy's mum
is even worse than he is.

She's been trying to get
him hitched to this...

I don't know, this rich
New York girl for years.

It's the ultimate
business merger.

So she's arranging
his marriage?

You could
call it that, yeah.

What a hypocrite.

See, that's the great thing
about living in India.

You don't have to have money
to enjoy this place,

and if you have money,

you never get to see
the real India, you know.

I just feel like people here have
got their priorities sorted.

I'd love for you
to come to Amritsar.

It's... It's beautiful.

It's just that not many
tourists go there.

Am-Amritsar. Is that where
the Golden Temple is?

Yeah. I'm sorry
we're leaving today,

but I'd love to show you
my hometown.

Yeah, I'd love
to show you London.

♪ My eyes are searching,
my hips are working

♪ My lips are waiting,
take me to love

♪ My skin's pulsating,
my body's shaking

♪ My lips are waking,
take me to love

♪ India's the place for me

♪ India sets you free

♪ My eyes are searching,
my hips are working

♪ My lips are waiting,
take me to love

♪ Oh

♪ Take me

♪ Take me to love

♪ To love

♪ Oh, no

Hurry up, Bejali.
And be careful. Oh...

Ah, you're back.

What's going on, Lakhi?

Everything OK?

Yes, Mama, it was lovely.

Good. Now one is all
but taken care of.

- We have to prepare for number two.
- What?

Maya, hurry up
with the bucket!

He'll be here soon!

- Who? Who, Mama?
- Don't ask.

Kholi sahib.

- He's on his way from the airport.
- Who?

Kholi. He's your father's
sister's husband's sister's son,

and he's a top accountant
in California.

But why is he
coming here?

To look at me for his bride.
What do you think?!

Hurry up, girls. Come on here.
I want to look at you.

Hurry up, hurry up.
Come on fast.

Now listen to me
carefully, girls, huh?

It's very important to make a
good first impression on Kholi sahib.

Stand straight, smile,

don't talk unnecessarily,

and don't say anything
too intelligent. You.

Shame she only selectively
practices what she preaches.

Why don't you go outside
and welcome the guest?

I'll do that.

Bejali, go outside
and get the luggage.

Mama G, what's up?

Hello. How are you?

Ho-ho-ho.

Bejali is here.

Go outside, you bloody fool.

Hey! Ew...

Bejali.

Oh!Hey!

Come in, Kholi sahib.
Welcome.

We weren't expecting
you so early.

You've really taken
us by surprise.

What a pleasure
to see you, Mama G,

after so long time.

Oh... oh, who?

Oh, of course.
You remember my daughters.

Jaya, Lalita...

Uh...Maya...

and Lakhi.

From small,
great caterpillars

to such
beautiful butterflies.

And so like you,
Madam Butterfly.

This is my dream home.

Colonial-style, five bedrooms,
three and a half bathrooms.

$850,000.

- That's 4 crores, 25 lakhs.
- Oh, my.

I bought it only six months ago.

It's already worth $900,000.

Bet it has three swimming pools.

Uh, actually, the
complex has two pools.

Plus, my crib...

has its own hot tub
bath with super jets.

It's the bomb.

Is it near
Beverly Hills, 90210?

No. No... No,
it's in the valley.

But 20 minutes down 101 Freeway,
and you're in North Hollywood.

Ha-ha-ha-ha. Did you
hear that, Lalita?

He lives in Hollywood.

You must join me in U.S.
You must, you must, you must.

I could help you
start a business there.

That's where the
money's to be made.

UK's finished.
India's too corrupt.

Kholi sahib, India's still a young
country since independence.

I hardly think
its potential is over.

And what do you think your U.S. was
like after 60 years of independence?

They were all killing
each other over slavery

and blindly
searching for gold.

Tell you what.

I've made a packet
as an accountant in LA.

The Indian community there
is very professional,

all doctors
and computers and...

Not like these uneducated,
minicab, 7-Eleven-store types.

It's ours for the taking.

Anyone can become an Amrikan.

Then why come back here?

- Ah... bada-bing, bada-boom.
- Bada-bing, bada-boom...

There's only one
problem with Amrika.

our girls that
are born there...

they've totally
lost their roots,

completely clueless.

Our girls are very rooted.

They're really
very, very traditional.

You know, in U.S.,

they're all too outspoken
and career-orientated,

and some...

have even turned into...

the lesbian.

Ahem.

So that leaves me no choice...

I may be healthy,
wealthy and wise,

but as they say,

"No life... without wife."

Kholi sahib.

You're a poet as well.

Did you hear that,
Mr. Bakshi, huh?

"No life without wife."

Yes. Very wisely spoken.

I think God is
smiling down on me.

I'm spoiled for
choice in this house.

I suppose, as the eldest...

Jaya must be the first choice.

A-Actually,
Kholi sahib,

Jaya's practically
engaged to someone else.

But Lalita is unspoken for.

Lalita.

Lalita.

♪ Lonely Mr. Kholi
from Los Angeles

♪ Came to Punjab
on one bent knee

♪ He had a green card,
new house, big cash

♪ So made a wish
with every fallen lash

♪ For you to do
the journey with him

♪ To smile when he got home,
ask how his day had been

♪ He wants you by his side
in joy and strife

♪ Poor Mr. Kholi,
he has no life without wife

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ I don't want a man
who ties me down

♪ Does what he wants
while I hang around

♪ I don't want a man
who's crude and loud

♪ Wants a pretty wife
to make him proud

♪ I don't want a man
who can't be funny

♪ Tells tall tales
about makin' money

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ I don't want a man
who'll grab the best seat

♪ Can't close his mouth
when he starts to eat

♪ I don't want a man
who likes to drink

♪ Or leaves his dirty dishes
in the sink

♪ I don't want a man
who wants his mummy

♪ A balding pest
with too much tummy

♪ I don't want a man
who's dead in the head

♪ Poor Mr. Kholi

♪ Ay, Mr. Kholi

♪ Maybe he's good in bed

Eww!

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ What you don't want
don't matter no more

♪ Soon you'll be married
and ready to go

♪ A match made in heaven,
just like milk and honey

♪ You'll make all the ghobi,
he'll make the money

♪ Every day will be the same
according to his plan

♪ Forget what you want,
Mr. Kholi's now your man

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ I just want a man
with real soul

♪ Who wants equality
and not control

♪ I just want a man,
good and smart

♪ A really sharp mind
and a very big heart

♪ I just want a man
not scared to weep

♪ To hold me close
when we're asleep

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ I just want a man
who loves romance

♪ Who'll clear the floor
and ask me to dance

♪ I just want a man
who gives some back

♪ Who talks to me
and not my rack

♪ I just want a man
whose spirit is free

♪ Who'll hold my hand,
walk the world with me

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ No life

♪ Without wife

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Sorry, Mr. Kholi,
it is not to be

♪ My heart is set
on another, you see

♪ The wandering soul
I was meant to meet

♪ Has finally come
and swept me off my feet

♪ Now I dream
of what it would be like

♪ To be an overseas bride
dressed in white

♪ To have a little home
in the country

♪ And live in the land
of Her Majesty

Come, come.

Thank you.

- Yes?
- Namasteto you.

I came to see Lalita.
I'm friends with her.

Friends?

Yes.

Lalita!

Yes, Mama.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- You made it.
- Yeah, I made it.

- Come in.
- Thank you.

- How was your journey?
- It was great. Thank you very much.

- Hello, Johnny.
- Hi, Jaya. How are you?

Papa, this is
our friend from Goa.

- Johnny Wickham. He's from London.
- Sha Bakshi.

Oh, pleased to meet you.
Johnny Wickham.

He wanted to see
the Golden Temple,

so do you think he could
stay with us, Papa, please?

Yes, of course.

We can do with some
fresh conversation here.

- I'll show you the guest room. Come on.
- Thank you, Mr. Bakshi.

Miss Bakshi.

Oh, God, he's too yum.

Shh, he can hear you.

He cannot stay here.

Hippies are dirty
and they steal.

Mama, he's not a hippie.

And what will
Kholi sahib say?

He is staying here in a house
full of young unmarried women?

Your Mr. Kholi's been in the house a day,
and he's already running things?

I think we can take him to the
Garba tonight, huh, Mama?

Lalita, please may I have
the first dance with him?

See what
you've started?

Don't be ridiculous,
Lakhi.

He cannot come
to the Garba.

But Mama, there's never enough
cute boys to dance with.

Have you all gone mad?
What will Balraj think of us

if we all end up
there with him?

Surely unfair.

- What's unfair?
- Papa...

she will not have our friend
come to the Garba.

Of course he should come
and see Garba with us.

I just invited him.

This is really a madhouse.

I'm so glad
he's come.

I really didn't think
he'd make it.

I can't wait to see Balraj.

I wish he didn't have to
bring that Darcy with him.

There's one thing I don't
quite understand, though.

If Darcy is Balraj's
best friend,

he can't be as awful
as Johnny thinks he is.

Jaya, you look
absolutely beautiful.

Ha-ha-ha-ha.
And, Lalita,

you look nice, too.

You really made
an effort tonight.

No doubt, you had
certain someone in mind.

Hey, mastered
the Garba already?

Uh, no. I could only
hope and pray, really.

Lakhi's a great
teacher, though.

Oh, his Garba style
is killing, man.

Come on, Jaya, they're here.
Move away, please.

- Oh.
- Sorry.

Lakhi. Lakhi.

I'm so sorry about my mother.
She can be a little abrupt.

It's all right. There's
no need to apologize.

I appreciate her
letting me stay.

I'm so glad you came.

You couldn't come to India
and not see Amritsar.

No, you were right.
It's very beautiful.

You sure you're
ready for this?

I'm willing
to take the risk.

- Hello. Oh, hi.
- Hi.

Hey there, buddy.

Buddy, how are you?

Madam, would you
do me the honor?

You know, actually,
I prefer American hip-hop,

but as Gloria Estefan says,

"The rhythm
is going to get you."

So bring it on.

Huh?

- Hi.
- Hi.

You look liked you were
working hard out there.

Hey there, partner.

This is Mr. Kholi, and this is
my best friend Chandra Lamba.

Oh, oh...

It is such a great pleasure

to meet yet another
beautiful young lady.

There must be something magical
in the water in Amritsar.

I'll happily get drunk on it.

Please, can I have the honor
of getting you ladies

a soft drink, huh?

Yes, please.
Thank you.

Oh, my God.

I thought he was gonna put
you in hospital out there.

Try eating with him.

It's like looking at a
Jackson Pollock painting.

So... Jaya told me
you met someone in Goa.

Maybe.

So Mr. Darcy didn't
manage to seduce

the jewel of Amritsar?

Please. He's such
a conceited, arrogant...

Hello, Lalita.

- Hello.
- Hi.

I've been studying
this Garba thing.

Looks a little
out of my league,

but what the hell?

Would you like to dance?

Sure.

Lalita...

She...

So I believe we're coming to your
house for dinner tomorrow night.

Balraj said your
father invited us all.

Can't wait.

Surprised to see
your old friend Johnny?

I wasn't so much surprised
as disappointed.

He's staying with us.
My family really like him.

Oh, yeah,
everyone loves Wickham.

Makes friends easily, and he
loses them just as quickly.

And what about you?
Are you a loyal friend?

What are you talking about?

I've heard so many things
about you, Darcy.

I really can't seem
to figure you out.

Well, maybe you shouldn't
listen to everything you hear.

You should talk. After all the rubbish
you said about arranged marriages,

I can't believe your mother's
arranging yours.

May I have this dance,
Madam Bakshi?

I thought you'd never ask.

Shall we, uh...

Lalita! Bejali!
Where is my china?!

I'm sorry about this stupid dinner tonight.
I wanted you to join us.

Don't worry about it.
I'm used to it.

Still, I wish you could come.

It would make this evening
a lot less boring.

Ah, there you are.

I've been looking for you
everywhere. Where have you been?

Lakhi's decided she wants to
show me the town tonight.

Uh-huh. I want to take him
for Amritsar fish, fruit cream

and hot gulab jamuns.

That's nice.

- Where are you looking? Look at me.
- Bejali, bring my china, please!

Cholo, Bejali.

I'm warning you.

The cobra dance.

Oh!

Thank you.

That was lovely,
Maya.

- Papa, shall I play the sitar now?
- That's all right, Maya.

You have entertained us
enough for the evening, OK?

Thank you. Very good.

I still can't believe
I'm sitting with a Darcy

in Amritsar, of all places.

- This world is too small, no, dude?
- Way too small.

Lalita, my firm
has been doing business

for many years with
Darcy's mother, Miss Catherine.

Beautiful lady.

- She has such a big hotel in Beverly Hills.
- Can I get anyone else a drink?

- Me, please.
- Yes, please.

Let me help you
with that.

Why don't you
all have something?

Balraj, have something.

I saw you dance with Wickham
the other night,

and I hear from Darcy
that he's staying with you.

- Yeah. So?
- Look, don't fall for his bullshit.

He's more trouble than he looks.
You know his mother was Darcy's nanny...

And you're Darcy's friend.

Of course you'd take
his side, wouldn't you?

There's no crime in being
the son of a servant.

I've heard so many stories

about your Mr. Darcy
sahib in Goa, Balraj.

Let's just say that Darcy and India
have had a little bit of a rough time.

Ah, these Indians, they don't
know how to treat tourists.

- There's no sophistication.
- What do you mean "these Indians"?

- Are you no longer an Indian?
- I'm a green card-holder now.

India's decades behind.

Well, I think there's a lot about
India that we don't have.

Really? Like what?

Uh, well...

Well, I think it's nice the way
the families come together.

I lost my father
a while back,

and my mom spends a lot
of her time in New York,

so my sister and I, we don't
really have a family home.

I can't remember the last time that all
my family kind of got together like this.

Kholi sahib is only trying
to win over my daughters.

Yes. He wants them to be in love
with America as much as he is.

And why is that?

Well, you can see
for yourself, Mr. Darcy.

They are all exceptional
marriageable prospects

for any single young man.

Well, I hope you brought
big appetites.

Mrs. Bakshi has planned
a special feast for all of us.

The truth is

that Kholi sahib was quite
taken by Jaya at first,

but after I explained to him

that she was being coveted by
another fine gentleman from abroad,

I then steered him
towards Lalita.

Balraj, you are
a very lucky man.

Jaya's had many
suitors before,

with her great beauty
and fine figure,

but none were good
enough for her.

You two will make
a fine couple,

and you'll have no regrets
on your wedding night.

Lalita...

Jaya...

I need some help
in the kitchen.

Tsst-tsst.

Come on.

Come, come.

Come on.

Come on, Bejali.

Whew.

Power walking.
It's so healthy.

Everyone in LA
is so healthy.

They all like to exercise,
but not read.

Oh, no, no, there are great
bookstores, too. Word up.

There's nothing
you can't find in LA.

Nothing?

You sure you don't miss
some things from here?

Well, to be honest...

...what I do miss most
is companionship.

You know,
it can get very lonely

in such a big place,
and...

Lalita, I like you.

You're very peppy
and bright,

and I want to marry you and
bring you back right away.

- I've spoken to your mother...
- You already spoke to my mama?

Yes. She's very enthusiastic
about the marriage.

I'm sorry. You should
have spoken to me first.

I'm not ready
to be married. I...

I really can't accept.

Well, Lalita, I'm offering
to take you to Amrika, huh?

You and your family
will have no more worries.

I could never be the kind of wife
that could make you happy,

and I don't think you could
make me happy, either.

You know, I work for some
of the richest people in Amrika.

I have savings
and bonds and stocks,

and you wouldn't even
have to work.

But I like working.

OK. OK. Oh.

You know, you may never get such
a good offer like this one again.

I'm sorry.

It's too...
too much tension for me now.

She is happy
to let us all be ruined.

You must speak to her,
old man.

She wants love to be there
from the beginning.

Where was the love, Sha,
when we first got married, huh?

Tell her. Tell her
that you marry first,

then love grows.

I'll never speak to her again
if she refuses him.

Lalita, do you understand
what your mother is saying?

She is saying that she will
never speak to you again

if you do not marry
Kholi sahib. No?

Yes.

And I will never speak to
you again if you... do.

What?!

Thank you.

Ahh!

Oh, Khol...
Kholi sahib.

Where are you going?
Listen to me, Kholi sahib.

Listen to me.
Please don't leave like this.

Kholi sahib?
Kholi sahib.

Kholi sahib... Kholi sahib,
please listen to me.

Oh, my God. Kholi sahib,
I'll talk to her.

Just listen to me. I'm sure
she will understand, Khol...

Oh! Jaya, Balraj is here!

Kholi sahib.

Kholi sah...

I thought you weren't
leaving until next week.

I know. I'm sorry.

I've just found out that I have to be
on the next flight back to London.

Some important business has
come up that just won't wait.

- Hang on one sec.
- Where are you going?

Kiran and Darcy want
to go home, too, so...

Yeah...

I understand.

But I'll e-mail you
as soon as I get back, OK?

Well, I...

suppose I better go.

Everything OK?

Bye.

Mama?!

Mama? Mama?!

You won't believe what has happened.
Jaya, Lalita, come fast!

- You won't believe this!
- What is wrong, Lakhi?

Papa, Kholi has proposed
to Chandra Lamba.

- What?!
- What?

- No, I bet she gave him two tight slaps.
- No.

She said yes,
and you know what?

They're having a small
temple ceremony here

and then a big
American wedding in LA.

No.

I can't believe my best
friend would do that.

One billion Indians, and she had to
go and marry one of the stupidest?

People do horrible
things for money.

- And a green card, too.
- No, no, no, no.

But on the inside, Chandra's
not like that, I'm telling you.

Not everyone can stand up to the
pressure the way that you can, Lalita.

Better single than unhappy...

I have to go.

My mates are waiting
for me in Varanasi...

and I don't want to go, but I don't
want to desert my mates, either.

Oh. Of course.

Of course you should go.

I knew you wouldn't
stay forever.

Johnny!

Wait. You can't leave
without me!

Oh. Ugh!

- Ohh.
- Ohh.

- Lakhi.
- You'll come back now?

Maybe, yeah.

And don't you dare
remove this, OK?

You know, it's bad
luck if you do,

and you promised
you wouldn't.

All right,
well, um...

well-well,
I better go, OK?

I don't want
to miss that train.

Come.

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

♪ Another world,
how I long to be

♪ Where fallen stars must lie

♪ Roses bloom, never die

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

♪ A cold sunset

♪ Gold drop left to melt

♪ Close my eyes and wish

♪ I could see

♪ If it is near

♪ Or far from me

♪ This place called love

♪ Is it for real

♪ Or is it just a dream?

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

♪ Another world

♪ How I long to be

♪ Under clouds that don't cry

♪ Wounded birds can soar high

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

Sit down.
She'll pick up.

Hello.
Bakshis' residence.

Yes.

Why, hello,
Kholi sahib.

Really?

That's very kind of you.

It's really too much.

Chandra wants us to be
at her wedding in LA.

They're sending us
four tickets. Come on.

Hi, Chandra.

Four tickets.

So good to hear you
sounding so happy.

Jaya, we can stop
over in London.

You can meet Balraj again.

Hello?

Is that Kiran?

Hi. It's Jaya Bakshi
from Amritsar.

Actually, we were
just passing through London.

Really? OK.

We'll come by today, then.

Great. Bye.

See?

How nice to see you all again
in our part of the world.

The Thames...

Windsor Castle...

Oh, flag's up.
Queen's at home.

The queen.

So many lovely paintings.

- Is that an Andy Warhol?
- Wrong decade.

We have several originals
Mummy found in Barcelona.

Oh, Italian.
How nice.

Do sit down.

Lakhi!

- Hey!
- Oh, my God, Johnny!

How are you?
Oh, my God.

What on earth
are you doing here?

Oh, I came here
to surprise you.

You have, and it's a lovely surprise.
Thank you.

We brought her over
from India.

Don't know how
we'd manage without her.

Won't Balraj be
joining us for tea?

Oh, no, didn't I tell you?
Balraj isn't here.

He's in New York
with my parents.

No... you didn't tell me.

Yeah.

They want him to meet
a couple of girls out there.

Cake?

Lemon one's low fat.

Flight 714 to Los Angeles

is now ready for boarding.

Would all
first-class passengers

please make their
way to Gate 37.

Lalita?

- Hey.
- Hello...

Hi.

I was just checking in, and I...
You're on your way to LA?

- Yes. We are going for Kholi's wedding.
- Oh, of course.

Yeah, we have him booked into
our hotel in Beverly Hills.

It's beautiful in the garden
for a wedding.

- Oh, should we be getting on, too?
- Not yet, Mama.

They let first class on
before everyone else.

I hope we are in
better seats this time.

Ooh, it was so crowded and
noisy coming from Delhi.

Yeah.

I've just had a meeting
in London. On my way home.

Well, it's nice
to see you all.

Maybe I'll see you
at the wedding.

Thank God we're in economy.

One thing I asked -

not to be near
the toilets.

How will we sleep with all the flush
noise and the doors banging?

Hello.

- Pretty cramped back here, huh?
- Yes.

- No leg room for my blood circulation.
- Well, Mrs. Bakshi,

I was wondering if you'd like to
exchange seats with me in first?

No, we're fine, thank you.

Really, young man?

Me in first class?
Are you sure?

Yes, please.
It's the least I could do

to repay you for
your hospitality.

Show me.
Come. Show me.

Well, who could have guessed
he'd be so thoughtful?

Another glass
of champagne, madam?

Yes. Thank you.

Well, your mom's
very happy.

Thank you, but...
you really didn't need to do that.

Oh, well, it's a very
small price to pay

if it means I get
to sit next to you

for the next ten hours
and 53 minutes.

Well, I...
do intend to sleep

for at least ten
of those hours.

Yeah.

So how's Wickham?

Don't know.
Haven't heard from him.

Well, that sounds
just like him.

Why do you hate him so much?

Listen, Lalita, some things
are best left unsaid.

You know I
wouldn't lie to you.

You just have to trust me
that he's a nasty piece of work.

I would hate it
if he ever hurt you.

I wanted to tell you
in India, but, uh...

Well, I'm glad that
I can warn you now.

Warn me?

Let's just say it's a good thing
that he hasn't been in touch.

And I guess, the way
you two were dancing...

I was a little jealous.

What's going on
with Balraj?

He never wrote or called
Jaya ever since India.

You know, he and Kiran,

they know a fair bit about
pressure from their parents, too.

I guess we all do.

From what Johnny said,

I hear your mother's
no different.

Yeah.

Well, I don't know what
"Johnny" told you, but...

my mom's probably not
the best judge on marriage.

You know, I think sometimes
the only reason my parents

stayed together
as long as they did

was 'cause they lived
in separate countries.

You know, I want to marry someone
that I can't wait to see every day.

We're not gonna get
any sleep in these chairs.

Get used to it.

Take your arm
off my armrest

and keep your leg
to your side.

Hmm.

♪ Hey, must be the money

♪ If you wanna go
and get high with me

♪ Smoke a L
in the back of the Benz-y

♪ Oh, why must I feel
this way? ♪ Hey...

- Welcome.
- Hello.

♪ Hey, must be the money

♪ Must be the money Hey.

It's all good.

And this is the
en suitebathroom.

This one has a hot tub
bath with super jets.

Oh! Oh, you must
see this closet.

Just look at the space.

Chandra has this entire side
for all her 51 wedding suits.

- 51?!
- And that's gonna be the gym.

And that's my crib.

It's a nice-looking house.

- Ah, thank you.
- Very nice house.

I know what you're thinking,

- but he's a good man.
- Hello?

I'm not romantic
like you, Lalita.

I didn't want to take the chance
in case my prince never came.

I know he's not for you,
but... but he's kind,

and... and adores me.

And I love it here.

Chandra, I'm truly
happy for you.

I... I think I was a bit
too quick to judge him.

I'm sorry.

It's fine.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Yes, Kholi sahib,
it's lovely.

The ceiling's so high.

To think my wedding's
gonna be here?

Just put those
figures on my desk.

Oh, here we go.

Hi.

Hey.

Mr. Darcy.

- Hello, everyone.
- Good afternoon, sir.

Isn't it great we're
all together again?

Only this time, we have
home-court advantage, no, sir?

OK, why don't I
show you around?

Mmm.

That's very good, Paul.

Excellent.
I'll put the order in today.

Mm. Mm!
Will!

Mother.

I'd like you to meet
the Bakshi family.

So these are Kholi's relatives.

Such a pleasure to meet you,
madam, and your lovely hotel.

It's... first class.

So tell me everything
about India.

I've always been
fascinated by it.

India's such
a huge country,

I wouldn't know
where to begin.

It's always been a dream of mine,
ever since I was a little girl, to go there.

I was devastated when Will
said that I shouldn't go.

Oh, that's not
what I said, Mother.

I said that it might be hard
for you to travel there.

But you're the one that didn't
want to buy the hotel there.

The board wanted to. Oh, everybody
has their hand on India these days,

but Will refused.

Well, that was for
lots of reasons.

In fact, it was Lalita who
helped me make that decision.

A decision that
lost us a fortune.

Well, there's so much
to see in India, Mrs. Darcy.

You must come sometime.

Well, if I had a hotel,
I might have,

but what with yoga and
spices and Deepak Chopra,

the wonderful
Eastern things here,

I suppose there's no point
in traveling there anymore.

Well, I don't know
about that.

People haven't stopped
going to Italy

because Pizza Hut's opened
around the corner.

Yeah, right. Yes.

Ah, Georgina.

Oh, hey, Georgie.

Hey.Hey, come here.

Everyone...

I'd like you to meet my
little sister Georgie.

- Hi.
- Hi.

So this is Lalita.

Yeah.

Oh, Will told me all about your
fab time together in India.

Food poisoning, being
ravaged by mosquitoes...

Not your brother's idea
of a perfect holiday.

There were lots of things
I liked about it.

Well, I hope I get to hear you
play guitar while you're in town.

What?

Yeah, Will said you
played beautifully.

No. He's just exaggerating.

No, my brother never lies.

Lunch.

He's one of the most eligible
bachelors in this town.

You should be stirring your
husband's dinner, not trouble.

Darcy was just
being friendly.

Very friendly.

After meeting his mother,

I even felt
a little sorry for him.

I think what changed your mind
was seeing the size of his hotel.

Oh, hello?

Ah, hello, Mr. Darcy.

What can I do for you?

Oh, Lalita?

Well, why, yes,
she's just here.

Uh-huh.

Here's to the only person

I've ever seen
stand up to my mother.

I hope I wasn't too rude.

Trust me, it's good for her.

Reminded me of when
I first arrived in India.

Here I am, I'm trying
to deal with everything,

and then boom. You jump
straight down my throat.

- I didn't know what had hit me.
- You deserved it.

Oh, come on.

Sí, señor!

I really like this place.

It's... It's not at all where
I expected you'd take me.

Aha. You see?
I told you you misjudged me.

The band is great.

Why don't you show 'em
how it's done?

- No. No, no, no, no way.
- No, I guess your guitar playing

can't really compare to
your sister's snake dance.

♪ Show me the way

♪ Take me to love

♪ Things only hurt

♪ Now I want to feel

♪ Nights are caressed
by silken breeze

♪ Whisper secrets
to listening trees

♪ Show me that world

♪ Take me to love

♪ Ohh-ohh-ohh

♪ Show me the way,
take me to love

♪ Come out, blue moon

♪ I need a friend soon

♪ To share what
I'm feelin' for him

♪ Shine down on me

♪ So I can see

♪ The silver street
that leads me to

♪ The place I want to be

♪ Show me the way,
take me to love

♪ Show them the way,
take them to love

♪ Things only hurt

♪ Now they want to be

♪ Two beings with
one beating heart

♪ For their whole lives
not to part

♪ Show them the world,
take them to love

♪ Ohh

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la

♪ Show them the way

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la-la

♪ Take them to love♪ La-la
la-la-la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la
la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la

♪ Ohh

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la...

♪ Yeah

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ La-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la

♪ Ohh

Hey, how you doing?

This is my wife.
My mother-in-law.

Jaya, smile, please.

Your face looks like
a baby's smacked bottom.

Kholi wants you to meet a plastic
surgeon from Orange County.

I can't just forget Balraj
like that, Mama.

Please don't make
it any worse.

I'm sorry.
Excuse me.

Can I talk to you
for a second?

You look more
comfortable this time.

It really suits you.

- There you are.
- Listen...

- Hi, Lalita.
- Hello, Mrs. Darcy.

Uh, I'd like you to meet
Will's girlfriend Anne.

Lolita.

That's such a cute name.
Like the movie, right?

It's, um, Lalita.

Nice to meet you...

Anne.

...Anne.

This is so much fun.
Look at all the colors.

Just imagine, she would
have missed all of this,

so I insisted that she come on the
plane from New York with me.

Lalita, doesn't Anne look
wonderful in Indian clothes?

Oh, stop that, Catherine.
She's too kind.

You look lovely.

Shall we go?
The ceremony is starting.

...comfort her and keep her
in sickness and in health,

as long as you
both shall live?

Yes, I do.

Chandra, do you take this
man as your lawful husband,

to love, honor and
comfort him and to keep him

in sickness and in health
as long as you both shall live?

Yes, I do.

By the power vested in me
by the state of California,

I hereby pronounce you,
man and wife.

You may kiss.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- You OK?
- Yeah.

- Thanks.
- Sure.

- The ceremony was so beautiful.
- Yeah.

- They both look really happy.
- Mm-hmm.

So I guess the next Indian wedding
I'll get to go to is Balraj's.

Well, that's if he and
my brother make up.

What do you mean?

Well, he and my brother

aren't really talking
much right now.

Yeah? Why?

Um, he didn't tell
me everything,

but I guess Balraj
met someone in India,

and Will didn't think
she was right

and ended up having to
talk him out of marrying her.

Your brother
talked him out of it?

Oh, no, he was just
looking out for him.

The girl's mom was
a total nightmare.

She was a gold digger out to nail
a rich hubby for her daughter.

Is that scary, or what?

Oh, there's Will.

I'm sorry.
I... I gotta go.

Lalita, wait.

Please give me
a minute to explain.

Look, I'm sorry
about Anne coming.

- I didn't know.
- I don't give a damn about her.

I hope you two
are very happy.

I don't love her.

Look, my mother never told me
that she was inviting her.

Look, it's not my business
what you and your mother do.

Yes, it is.

Look, Lalita...

I love you.

And I hated seeing you
with Wickham in India,

and I tried my hardest
to forget you, but I couldn't.

I know this sounds totally crazy.
My mom's gonna flip out.

but I don't want
you to leave.

Only you could say
that you love me

and insult me
at the same time.

What?

You tried to forget me.

Loving me is crazy. I'm not
good enough for your mother.

And you think I'd want
to leave my family for you

after you've ruined
my sister's life?

- OK, hold on, hold on.
- Georgie told me.

You talked Balraj
out of marrying Jaya.

Yeah, yeah, I did,

but I have my reasons.

And you ruined
Wickham's life, too.

Look, just let me explain.

We may not have
your family's money,

but that does not make
us inferior to you.

I'm being honest
with you here, all right?

My family are not gonna be
jumping for joy about it.

I'm telling you
that I don't care.

When I first met you,

I thought you were rude,
arrogant, intolerant

and insensitive.

But over the last few days, I thought
maybe, maybe I made a mistake.

But I was right.

You're the last person
I'd ever want to be with.

Hey, Mr. Darcy,
how you doing?

Hey, Kholi,
is Lalita here?

I'm sorry, sir.
You missed her.

- What?
- I already took them to the airport.

They're on their
way to London.

You want to come in
for a beer or something?

I'll get it!

It's so tragic.

Not a single proposal.

So sad. So sad.

My fate is to live
in that rotten house

full of spinsters

and no grandchildren.

- Don't worry...
- Everything will be all right.

Everything will be all right.

Mama, I was thinking...

can I go shopping?

- Go, Lakhi. Go.
- Thank you, Mama.

If we are not bringing
back any husbands

and she goes shopping,

at least we won't be
going back empty-handed.

Hey... what's wrong?

We almost did have
a proposal.

Proposal?

Who?

Will Darcy.

Darcy?

I know that sounds crazy.

What did he say?

That he loves me.

And what did you say?

Hello.

- Hi.
- How are you?

- I'm so happy to see you.
- Good to see you.

- How long you been waiting?
- Very long.

- Shall we go?
- Yeah.

It's from Lakhi.

Oh, God.

- Darcy...
- Lalita...

I feel like I owe
you an apology.

- This isn't a good time.
- Lalita, please, just...

I'm sorry about Jaya.

I wasn't sure whether
she really loved Balraj.

I thought your mom
was just pushing her.

I was an idiot.

I've apologized to Balraj,
because I know that he still loves her.

- He'd like to see her if...
- I don't have the time for this.

- Wickham has...
- Wickham is a liar.

He got my sister pregnant
when she was 16,

and he ran off, and he tried to
marry her for my father's money.

I stopped him, and I had
to pick up the pieces.

Oh, my God.

- What?
- Lakhi.

Lakhi has gone off
with Wickham.

What?

Lakhi went out shopping yesterday,
and she never came back.

Mama's sick in bed.

Papa is here from India
with the police.

They can't seem
to find her anywhere.

Wickham!

Lakhi!

Know where he is?

So beautiful.
I love it.

He left with some bird.

Said something
about the London Eye.

Smile.

I don't know.

- Oh, my God, Johnny.
- Hey.

I want to go on that.

- I want to go on that, too.
- Lalita.

Lakhi!

Lakhi!

Oh, my God. Bollywood.

Go away!

No!

Go away!

- Johnny, there's two seats.
- Mm-hmm.

- Darcy.
- Lakhi.

Lakhi, let's go.

Hey!

Lakhi, you don't...
Lakhi, come back!

Johnny, come on!
What are you doing?

- Lakhi.
- Johnny.

Just... stop it now.

Leave him. Let's go.

Lalita, not him, please.
Anyone -

Ohh.

Don't you dare.

Lalita, it was always you!

Ooh.

I'm so sorry.

Let's call Mama and Papa.

Papa.

- Oh, Lakhi!
- Ohh...

Oh, thank God you're safe.

- Mama, I'm so sorry.
- What sorry?

No boy is coming within ten miles
of you until you get married.

Mama, Papa,
it's Will who found her.

Oh. Thank you so much, sir,
for bringing her home.

- We're really indebted to you.
- No, really.

Lalita, help him
clean up his face.

- Balraj is here.
- Tell them.

Yes, yes. There's
an important news.

- Your sister is getting married.
- Yes!

- Oh, my God, Jaya!
- Lakhi!

Lakhi.

Congratulations.

I'm so happy for you.

- It's a long story. Hey, congratulations.
- Thank you.

- Jaya.
- Come on, come on, sit down now.

Come, come, Darcy.
Sit down, sit down, sit down.

She's fine. She's back now.
She's fine.

Jaya, relax.

Balraj, now that we are
one big family,

why don't you
find our Lalita

a nice Indian husband?

Don't you have
any cousins?

That's nice. Will you
have a look at these?

Balraj, a family is a family, yeah?

I'm so happy
for you, Jaya.

I told you, the moment he
saw you, he was yours.

I didn't think it would
ever happen for me.

But it did.

About 20.

Jaya!

Balraj is already here!

Beautiful.

Coming.

Where's Darcy?

He'll be there somewhere.

Lalita, he's over there.

♪ Marriage has come to town

♪ Laughter, color,
light and sound

♪ Life is great,
let's celebrate

♪ The sacred union
two souls have found

♪ Can't wait for the day

♪ Can't keep our shoulders down

♪ God bless you for getting

♪ This marriage into town

♪ My eyes are searching,
my hips are working

♪ My lips are waiting,
take me to love

♪ My skin's pulsating,
my body's shaking

♪ My lips are waking ♪ Take me to love

♪ Ohh

♪ India's the place for me

♪ India sets you free

♪ My eyes are searching,
my hips are working

♪ My lips are waiting,
take me to love

♪ Da-la-da-la-la,
da-da-da-da-da

♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da

♪ My heart's awaking,
his love forsaking

♪ I am awaiting

♪ Take me to love Take me to love.

♪ Ba-la-la-la

♪ La-la-la-la...

That's a wrap!

♪ Can you

♪ Can you

♪ Can you

♪ Can you

♪ Can you touch my body,
make me feel like I never felt?

♪ Deliver it, make me
shiver from head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side

♪ Come on, push up on me,
I'm feelin' hot tonight

♪ Can you touch my body,
make me feel like I never felt?

♪ Deliver it, make me
shiver from head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side

♪ Come on, push up on me,
I'm feelin' hot tonight

♪ What I gotta do
to get a little closer to you?

♪ To you?

♪ I been watching you,
I really wanna get to know you

♪ Know you, so

♪ I'm kinda feeling your vibe
as I look in your eyes

♪ And you're watchin'
my thighs movin' left to right

♪ So whatcha wanna do? ♪ Wanna do?

♪ You come to me,
and I'll come to you

♪ Touch my body, make me
feel like I never felt

♪ Deliver it, make me
shiver from head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side

♪ Come on, push up on me,
I'm feelin' hot tonight

♪ Can you touch my body,
make me feel like I never felt?

♪ Deliver it, make me shiver
from head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side

♪ Come on, push up on me,
I'm feelin' hot tonight

♪ If I could be alone with you,
this is what I would do

♪ I would do

♪ I would grab you by the hand
and begin to show you

♪ Show you

♪ How to make it real hot,
never want it to stop

♪ Take it up to the top,
make my body rock

♪ So whatcha gonna do? ♪ Gonna do?

♪ You come to me
and I'll come to you ♪ Can you...

♪ Touch my body, make me
feel like I never felt?

♪ Deliver it, make me
shiver from head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side ♪ Side to side

♪ Come on, push up on me,
I'm feelin' hot tonight

♪ Can you touch my body,
make me feel like I never felt?

♪ Deliver it, make me
shiver from head to toe ♪ Head to toe

♪ Move my waistline
side to side... ♪ Side to side

♪ I'm feelin' hot
tonight

♪ Now, can you
rocket up, rocket up?

♪ Don't stop, just move your
waistline from side to side

♪ Now as you push it up,
push it up

♪ And do the body right

♪ Do the body right,
do the body right

♪ Now, can you
rocket up, rocket up?

♪ Don't stop, just move
your waistline from side to side

♪ Now as you push it up,
push it up

♪ And do the body right

♪ Can you?