Boy Erased (2018) Movie Script

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Sync by GoldenBeard

Jared.

Why are you upset, honey?

I want my jersey.

- Well, it's because it's dirty.

- I want it.

You know, today is

your first day of school.

What?

You like to play

something in particular?

- Uh, soccer!

- You like to play soccer. And?

And basketball!

What's your favorite color?

Uh...

Uh, blue and yellow.

- Blue...

- And yellow.

- and... yellow.

- Yellow.

What would you like to be

when you grow up?

Motorcycle driver!

Bye! Hi!

Jared?

You should come down

for breakfast.

I wish none of this

had ever happened.

But sometimes

I thank God that it did.

Just repeat after me.

Let your light shine.

Now, let me see a show of hands

of those of you

in this room who are imperfect.

Everybody.

That's right.

And a show of hands

for everybody in this room

who is perfect.

- Nobody.

- Amen.

I am blessed

with a beautiful

and deeply soulful wife,

and with a fine...

upstanding...

...and honest son.

I'm a lucky man,

and I'm grateful

for those blessings.

Please don't do that.

You know that makes me nervous.

What if a truck comes along

- and hits your arm?

- It's never gonna happen.

It's happened before.

It has. It has.

Morning.

Welcome to Love in Action.

Hi.

- Name?

- Uh, Nancy Eamons.

Oh, um... the boy, I mean.

- Unless you're the one checking in.

- Oh.

- Jared Eamons.

Jared. Got you right here.

Great.

Do you want to say

your good-byes?

- Can I see the place?

- I'm afraid you won't be allowed

- beyond the reception area, Mrs. Eamons.

- Oh.

- But you can pick him up at 5:00 p.m.

- Okay.

- It's okay, Mom.

- Mm.

Well, call me anytime.

I'll be at the hotel

on my cell phone.

Uh, we will be holding

his cell phone.

If there are any emergencies,

we will contact you,

but otherwise, 5:00 p.m.

Mm.

You'll do great.

Love you.

Newbie. Eamons.

Empty your pockets.

Do you have

any numbers or photos

we should be concerned about?

We'll check it daily

and call any number at random,

so you best be straight

with us on that.

There's nothing. And, yeah,

call whatever numbers,

if you need to.

"Sobriety...

no smoking,

no alcohol or drugs."

"Off hours...

all clients to remain

within a safe zone area

as designated."

"Attire...

women's skirts must extend

below the knee, and bras are

to be worn at all times."

What's that?

Oh, it-it's, um, I...

I write, I write stories.

Uh, I'm studying it at college.

No journaling.

We're gonna have to read that.

"Confidentiality...

"all m-matters

discussed in therapy

are to remain private."

"Restrooms... members

must be supervised by staff

during restroom visits."

- Your handbook.

- Oh. Yeah.

- Good luck.

- Thank you.

"No viewing

of pornographic material,

"no masturbation,

no physical contact

"with any member at any time

apart from the briefest

of handshakes."

Michael for Aaron.

How many clients

are we expecting today?

Copy, Michael. Hold, please.

Uh, just one second, Jared.

We should have 11 today.

Well, we have

more in the lobby.

It's okay. We should

have another five minutes.

- All right.

- Copy.

Jared, if you just want to go

find yourself a seat and, uh,

make yourself comfortable.

We'll get started soon.

- Hi.

- Morning.

- Hi.

"...sinful, salacious,

"and extraneous materials.

"All reading material

and films and television

are off limits

while inside the program."

I am using sexual sin

and homosexuality

to fill a God-shaped void

in my life.

I am using sexual sin

and homosexuality to fill

a God-shaped void in my life.

But I am not broken,

and God loves me.

But I am not broken,

- and God loves me.

- Good. That is very true.

Now, somebody tell me

what this is.

Dollar.

A dollar.

Now, no matter how much

you crumple up a dollar bill...

you can never take away

its value.

Now, even if you were

to rip it...

which would represent

our being severed from Christ...

well, guess what?

You can always

tape it back together.

Jesus puts us back together.

And even though

there is a scar,

our value does not change.

- You are somebody.

- Sorry.

You are worth something.

That's okay, Jon. Sit down.

And that is a fact.

Don't spend it

all at once, Phillip.

Now, this may be the toughest

but most rewarding 12 days that

many of you will ever face.

But we have just one task:

to bring ourselves back to God.

To invite him back in.

To understand how

he truly meant to create us

before all those pieces

got torn away.

Now, look, I know

the road here wasn't easy

for many of you.

But I promise a smoother ride

now that you're here,

because we are about to go

on an amazing journey together.

So who's ready?

That was a question.

Who's ready? Say "amen."

- Amen.

If you know you're worth

a dollar, say "amen."

Amen.

Welcome to the Refuge program!

Come on!

That's right, great souls!

Great!

Now, I'm gonna tell you

something that's

gonna make you immediately

feel a little better.

People tell you you can be

born gay; that's not true.

You cannot be born

a homosexual; this is a lie.

Now, I'm a counselor

and a pastor,

but was I born that way?

No.

It's behavioral. It's a choice.

Cameron, you-you, uh,

play football?

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Were you born that way?

- No.

Now, you chose to be

a football player, right?

It's behavior.

Now, if you... if Cameron

stops playing football,

he no longer is

a football player.

We got to learn for ourselves

where behavior comes from,

so we can cut it out,

and then we can no longer

be labeled that way.

Now, who could tell us

what a genogram is?

Phillip.

Well, a genogram's

like a family tree,

only one that shows patterns

of family behavior as well.

Sort of like

an illustrated one.

Yes. Now, we are going to draw

our family tree,

and we're gonna list

next to these people

their behavioral sin.

So, they made us...

and they labeled us,

so we're gonna label them.

Michael, can you read

the behavioral sins?

We use the letters "SSA" or "H"

to label same sex attraction

or homosexuality.

"D" for drugs.

A dollar sign for gambling.

"A," alcoholism.

"P," promiscuity.

"M," mental illness.

Capital "A" lowercase "B"

for abortion.

Capital "P" lowercase "O"

for pornography.

And "C" or "G,"

criminal or gang affiliation.

Forgetting "DV,"

domestic violence.

Capital "D" lowercase

"V," domestic violence.

Okay, guys,

let's dive right in.

Let's grab some cards

and some markers.

I want you to write 'em down...

and put the letters

next to their name.

I know they're family,

but I can guarantee that one

or some of these people

are the reason that

you're at Love in Action.

So, Jared, you must be

the preacher's son.

You know or you don't know.

What's the question mark for?

Uncle Chris is an alcoholic.

Hmm.

Well, this must be pretty tough

on your family, hmm?

"Give ear,

O my people, to my law.

"Incline your ears

to the words of my mouth.

"I will open my mouth

in a parable.

I will utter dark sayings

which we have heard."

- No.

- Sounds good, Dad.

Are you ready?

We got to get going.

Why are we going

to Dallas tomorrow?

Architect's updated the, uh,

remodel plans for the ministry,

and we're gonna take a tour

of two similar churches

right there.

Do you think

I could stay at Chloe's

when you go, instead?

It's okay,

I can stay at Wayne's.

- Or-or I'll just...

- I am okay with that.

In fact, I think

it is a great idea.

You're both mature kids

who know how

to conduct themselves,

and who, by now,

know how the world works.

You know, son,

small steps toward manhood.

That's the way to learn.

That way you don't

get all panicky

when it suddenly arrives.

You do know

what I'm saying, Romeo?

- Yes, sir.

- Okay. Let's go. We're late.

Dear Heavenly Father,

we thank you

for this beautiful day.

And, Lord, we pray

that you look over our shoulder

as we march out onto the floor,

and that we show our customers

the love and kindness

that you show us.

In Jesus Christ's name,

and for his sake...

Morning! Let your light shine!

- Amen.

- All right!

- Have a great day.

"Rebels" on three!

On three! One, two, three!

Rebels!

You did so good.

Right, buddy? Assists,

one of the most underrated

components of the game.

- Congratulations.

- I saw you

setting up all the points.

- Oh! That's victory sweat.

- Dad, I... - Yeah.

I-I played, like, five minutes.

- I think you did more than that. How about you?

- Hey!

- Another underrated component of the game.

- Thank you.

- How are you?

- Congratulations, beautiful girl.

I was worried about you.

I thought they were

- gonna drop you. Oh.

- Oh, no, don't worry.

- Are you kids gonna go celebrate?

- Yeah, some of us,

- I think we're gonna go to the lake.

- Yeah.

All right. The lake.

All right.

Dealership's gonna put me

in an Expedition,

so it's yours.

Wow. Dad.

All right. All right.

It was gonna be

for your birthday, but, you

know, tonight's a good night,

- so congratulations.

- Thank you so much.

- Thank you.

- Go and have fun.

I want to see if your mama

wants to go to the lake.

They're still up.

What?

I-If it's not hard,

I can make it hard.

Don't you think

we should wait until,

- you know...

- Until...

- You know?

- Until what? We get married?

That's what my parents

think we should do.

To keep us together

through college.

Hey.

Is something wrong?

No.

Jared.

Ready to pack it up?

We're about done for the day.

Looks nice.

5:00, everyone.

It's home time.

- Bye.

- 5:00. Let's go.

All right, everybody,

pack it up.

Name tag.

- Thanks.

- 9:00 a.m. tomorrow.

Uh...

hey, y-you tore out the pages.

- Mm.

- They're just stories.

Mr. Sykes will decide that.

...to Michael.

- Go for Michael.

- Are you still in the office?

Are you, are you a soldier?

Were you in the military,

or some...?

- I saw you salute earlier. I thought...

- No.

I'm trying zero contact

whatsoever.

- Mm.

- 23 days now.

So... I salute instead.

This group seems good.

Have you been here before?

Yeah, it's my second time

in the Refuge program.

I started a couple days late

last time,

and actually I'm waiting

for a place to open

in one of the houses.

- What houses?

- The-the houses. The...

They have a few houses

behind the property

for the long stayers.

Meanwhile,

I'm stuck at the Baybrook

with my dad,

which is interesting.

Are you in one of

the local hotels, too?

Yeah.

So, like, how-how long

will you stay for?

It's not really up to me.

Mr. Sykes decides.

- No one explained that to you?

- No, no.

This is just

an assessment program,

until they know

what to do with you.

Hey. Listen.

Just lean into it, man.

Yeah.

Do the work,

and trust me, man...

you're gonna love it here.

Aren't you gonna tell me

about your day?

We're not meant to talk

about it outside of group.

I don't need gossip.

I just...

I just mean generally.

I'm gonna lean into it.

And there are some good people.

And, yeah, I like it.

I'm excited to be here.

That's good.

Do we have people in the family

who had issues

with any of this stuff?

Pornography?

Mom.

Drugs?

Gang affiliat...

Gang affiliations?

What is this?

I need to know for homework.

Why do they need to know

about the family?

Our family is so normal.

Big day tomorrow, hmm?

You get some good sleep, now.

Oh, um, I filled out

your homework for you.

I was only in a gang

for a year or so, until I...

went down for drugs,

got sent to prison.

Ha-ha.

I put your Uncle Vincent

down there.

You've never met him, 'cause

he, uh, moved to Louisiana

when you were little, so...

we just never see him.

We always figured that he...

He was very feminine-like,

you might say.

All right.

Oh. I'm tired.

- Night-night.

- Good night.

What is... a real man?

And what does

a real man look like?

Does anybody know?

Guys, uncross your legs.

Posture. Come on.

Now, perhaps being close

to the flames of hell

and finding your way back

shows a great strength.

And if that were so, then...

if this isn't a real man,

then I don't know what is.

This is Brandon Ellis, guys.

- I want you to say hello.

- Thanks, Sykes.

Make him welcome.

Over to you, Brandon.

Thank you.

God bless. God bless.

A real man, to me,

is a man of God,

first and foremost.

And I'm a man of God, no doubt.

I guess that counts me in.

But I wasn't once.

If I was ever listed

on my own son's genograms,

there'd be so many of these

letters next to my name,

it would look

like qualifications

for some fancy university.

Drugs, violence, gang crime,

prison time,

but I actually believe

I'm qualified to be here.

Not because I've ever had the

types of thoughts and feelings

that y'all are wrestling with

or that your other

guidance counselors

have overcome righteously.

But I've had all sorts

of my own trials

that took me so far away

from the Lord

that it is a true miracle

that I'm standing here

before you today.

But I am.

I am.

Standing, leaning, sitting.

All the same idea.

Triangles are

the strongest shape.

Hand or hands on hips. Go!

Save yourself.

Fingers forward, not back.

Just the way it is.

Think of the shapes

you're making and ask yourself:

Is this a manly shape

I'm making,

or is it a girly

or feminine shape?

Sarah, come on up here.

Come on,

you delicate flower, you.

Okay.

I want you to arrange

these guys into a line

in terms of masculinity,

if you will.

Go on, you can do it.

Follow your instincts.

Myself and other addicts

and alcoholics

put our faith in AA.

- Get familiar with this phrase:

- Knees up!

- Fake it till you make it.

- Knees up! Body up! Push!

And y'all folks and kids, being

what you're afflicted with,

better learn how to survive.

When you're in prison,

you'd surprise yourself

what you could do to fit in.

Come on, Phillip.

Eye on the ball.

Come on! Okay, next!

Fake it till you make it.

Become the man you are not.

So you think Cameron here

is the big winner, huh?

You think being big and tall

and overeating

immediately puts a guy

at the front of the line.

But it's more than triangles

or postures

and genetics.

Firm handshake!

Let's go! Do it!

You got to pick up the bat.

Hold the bat up!

- Ow!

- Ooh! -

Get back up on that horse!

All right,

just get him out of there.

- Lee, you're gonna be okay.

- Come on.

Jared, you're up next.

That's good.

Military man.

God bless, son.

Who you are on the inside

can be affected by the outside.

Outside in.

Fake it till you make it.

Adapt to survive.

Ah, see,

that's a batting stance.

That's what I'm talking about.

Boom!

Lesbian, gay, bisexual,

transsexual...

whatever that is...

multisexual,

intellectual sexual.

I mean, what else do you want?

Unicorns? Squirrels?

Cupcakes? I mean, rainbows?

There's so much choice

in this group,

but, hey, think about this.

What are the consequences

to those choices?

Have a look at this.

Rape, abuse, AIDS.

What sinful things

have y'all done?

Moral inventory.

Catalog your sins

and ask God's forgiveness.

Who is ready?

Sarah.

"I would look at other girls

"in the changing rooms

before gym

"and in the showers.

"My biggest sin is one

that I am also thankful for,

because it has led me

to Love in Action."

Doing well, Sarah. Carry on.

"I had run away

from my uncle's house

"and stayed

with some girls I knew

"whose parents were away.

"It was there

that I finally acted

on my homosexual thoughts."

Come on, Sarah.

"I let a girl touch my...

"kiss m-my...

...my vagina..."

Nobody's judging. Come on.

"...and put

her fingers inside me,

"and I did the same.

"I renounce these

sinful thoughts and actions,

and ask God to forgive me

all these things."

Very good.

We love you, Sarah.

All right, repeat after me.

We love you, Sarah.

Very good.

Do you want some water?

I'm fine, thanks.

- Can I get you anything else?

- I'm... I'm fine, thank you.

How dare you

humiliate a child like that?!

Is that what you guys...

you like that?

Do you like doing that?!

You like humiliating

and abusing children?!

- It's not easy...

- What do you mean it's not easy?!

- Lee's parents.

- His parents are here.

- Listen to yourself!

- With respect,

- we are not running a holiday camp here.

- We paid you $3,000.

I should report you. You could

have given him a concussion!

David, let's go.

That change doesn't come easy.

Unbelievable!

Y'all find the reason

y'all are here is funny?

Look at y'all!

People!

I'm trying to help you.

So do not waste my time.

Nobody is to discuss the

therapy outside these walls!

Do I make myself clear?!

Yo, I got your back. Whoa!

- Oh, sorry, sorry.

- I got that.

Thank you so much.

Which, uh, which room you in?

I'm in, uh, 317.

Oh, I'm in 237.

You run?

- Yeah.

- I figure.

People who run

know about ASICS, right?

Oh, yeah.

Here, this is me.

First one in gets to choose.

You got a girl?

If so, you might want to think

about applying for a room

without bunks.

Just broke up.

Oh. That's perfect timing.

Before college.

We're a good fit.

Hate running with slowpokes.

I'll tell you what,

I'll race you on the way back.

Last one back has to go

to the other one's church.

Why? What kind of church is it?

You game or not?

- All right.

- All right, one,

- two, three, go!

- Two, three, go!

- Ben. This is Jared.

- Hey, man, nice to meet you.

Did you say your roommate's

not back till tomorrow?

He's on some golf trip.

Do you want to crash?

Maybe.

Night.

Good night.

Can't sleep, huh?

Probably shouldn't run

so late at night.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Yeah, just...

It's okay.

Hey. It's okay. It's okay.

- Wait, wait.

- Shh, shh, shh.

Wait. Wait, wait, wait.

Shh.

- Shh.

- Stop, stop, stop.

Stop, stop, stop,

stop, stop, stop!

Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow!

Oh.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I'm so sorry.

I'm gonna be

in so much trouble.

I need to confess.

Will you hear me?

- Please.

- Uh-huh.

Do you remember

the kid from church?

The one in front of us.

Something happened

with me and him.

Something pretty bad.

You wouldn't dare tell anyone,

would you?

Please.

Keep it between us.

Start with chapter six, please.

What-what a surprise.

Oh!

- Hello.

- Is this Mrs. Nancy Eamons?

This is she.

I'm a counselor

at Danton College.

And I'm afraid I have

some disturbing news

about your son's behavior

at school.

What?

What about him?

- Did he give you a name?

- I need you to answer

- my question.

- If-if he gave you a name...

- Please, Jared, just answer me.

- I'm just saying...

Have you been doing

the things he says?

- Why wouldn't he give you a name?

- Come on, son, enough.

- Tell me the truth.

- I'm asking the questions, too.

He didn't, um,

give me a name. I don't...

The guy's full of shit.

He's telling a bunch of lies.

Now you will not talk

like that in this house

in front of your mother.

You just watch your mouth.

Nancy, if-if you could

just give us a moment,

- you know, just to...

- I'm-I'm leaving.

- I'm-I'm...

- Sit down. You will not leave the room.

You will sit down, boy.

- You will sit down.

- It's bullshit, Dad.

- It's bullshit.

- I just asked you to watch your mouth!

I think, um,

he said he was a counselor.

And then...

and I asked for his name,

- and then I asked for...

- Nancy.

- You see?

- ...his number and he didn't...

Nancy, please.

Dad, I-I...

He's made all of this up.

Let's just sit here.

We're just gonna talk calmly.

All right. All right.

No, Dad.

Jared.

I just need you to tell me

the truth, that's all.

What this man says of you...

Jared.

Are you a homosexual?

Jared. We are not finished!

- I am, because you won't listen!

- Honey. Honey.

What this man says,

is it true?

What this full-of-shit guy,

- who is not a counselor...

- Answer me!

...who raped a kid

at-at his own church,

and God knows who else!

- Dad, you're hurting me.

- Marshall.

His name is Henry Wallace.

He's-he's not a counselor.

- He's a student.

- All right.

And-and... he told me

he did some bad things.

I think he thinks

I'm gonna tell on him.

Honey.

Son.

Fight!

Go to war!

Your mother's making dinner.

I'm okay, I'm not hungry.

I want you to write down

this man's name,

his church,

phone number if you have it.

Any information at all.

I don't want you

to talk to him.

I ain't gonna talk to him.

If he's been doing

what you say,

then he needs to be reported.

Okay.

Now, you know what I did?

I invited Chloe and her parents

for lunch tomorrow.

And I was thinking it'd be fun

if you could join in.

Missing one more day of class

ain't gonna end the world.

You know, Jared...

...far as I can tell,

we've only got

one God-given right,

and that is when a man

and a woman come together,

they may create life.

You think how much God

must love mankind

to give us that

awesome responsibility.

Dad.

It's really not true.

You know what I think about

these type of games, too.

Be respectful to your mother

when she calls.

You come down and eat.

- Honey.

- All right.

You want me to stop

with the games?

I'll stop with them.

I broke up with Chloe.

Because...

We broke up because

I think it's true, about me.

God help me.

I think about men.

I don't know why.

I'm so sorry.

God bless you, Pastor.

Thank you, guys, for coming.

I've had better days,

I can tell you that.

Just a minute. Just a minute.

- Mom?

- Hold on.

All right.

Wh... Why are Pastor Wilkes

and Jim Picard here?

Pastor Wilkes has dealt with

this kind of thing before.

Jim has a son, Eddie, who, um...

y-you were a little boy, but...

Anyway.

What'd they do to him?

Oh, no. You silly thing.

They didn't do anything to him.

They did things for him,

all right?

Just like they're gonna

do things for you.

Your father's wondering...

he's wondering how to help.

Come here.

It's all gonna be all right.

We've got one question

for you, son.

And then we're gonna

let you sleep.

It's been a big day.

I have shared our conversations

with these two

fine upstanding men,

and I have asked them

for their guidance.

I can tell you right now,

we don't have all the answers.

But I do know that you gonna

hold the key to the next step.

Your mother and I,

we cannot see

a way that you can live

under this roof,

attend service

and work at the dealership

if you're gonna fundamentally

go against the grain

of our beliefs.

And against God himself.

I'm gonna ask you

that question now, son.

In your heart...

...do you want to change?

Yes.

Yes, I want to change.

Come a little closer, son.

Pastor Wilkes,

could you ask Jesus

to shine his light

on my boy at this time?

Heavenly Father, I ask

your blessing for this family.

Give them strength.

Unleash your power

for one of your flock, Jared,

who has lost his way.

We pray, Lord,

that you make him pure

and that you return him

safely back to us

and see that the errors

of his way

are nothing more than

a momentary straying.

We pray that he see

the path of faith

and that he strive to be honest

and that he then find the joy

of a new life.

In his name we pray.

Amen.

Jared.

How's college treating you?

Ah, it's going good. Yeah.

- It's good.

- Your father's asked me

to take some of your blood.

He wants me to... to check

for testosterone levels.

I'm in a bit of

a bind here, Jared,

and I-I said this

to your mother, too.

Now, I am a religious woman,

there's-there's no-no question,

but I have also been

to medical school,

and... well, you could say that

I hold science in one hand

and God in the other,

and that is not always

an easy balance.

And I know that everybody would

like for me to say otherwise

and send you down

to the pharmacy for a-a pill

that would magically fix you,

but that's not gonna happen.

But I'm gonna take your blood,

and I know,

I know what it's gonna show me.

That you are

a perfectly normal,

very healthy teenage boy.

Jared, it's-it's not my place

to tell you

that your parents are wrong,

but let's say

that they are wrong.

I understand

your father signed you up

for a program next month.

Whatever happens next,

it is still your choice.

It may not feel that way,

but it is.

You're 18.

Do you have anything

that you'd...

you'd like to say to me?

Any-any questions?

No.

Jared?

Morning.

So... I wanted to talk to you

about these.

Uh, your writing?

This, uh,

"Remy and Lucy met at midnight

under the stars

on Willow Street."

What-what...

tell me about these.

Well, it's-it's just,

it's-it's a story.

It's a love story about

a boy and a girl, correct?

- Yeah.

- But were you

thinking about two boys

when you wrote this?

No.

I mean, be honest.

No. It's just a story.

It's just an assignment

for college.

Jared, I've seen your

reading list for college.

I have it here, and listen,

The Picture of Dorian Gray,

Lolita,

I-I mean, some of

th-these books, Jared,

considering everything that's

going on for you right now,

I don't know that college

is really the best thing

for you to be pursuing at all.

A year with us may be

a much, much better use

of your time.

Given everything that I see.

And everything that's at stake.

And I'm willing to say that

to your parents.

Listen, I've had many

wonderful conversations

with your parents...

lovely people.

So, I know some of the story,

and I know that there is

quite a discrepancy

between what they were told

and what you said.

And you got to understand that

they don't know

what to believe,

and that's very troubling

for them.

But I think that you and I know

that there is a whole lot more

to the story,

and, you know, we're not here

on mere thoughts alone.

Jared, the-the people who get

the most out of this place

are the people that are just

really brave and-and honest

and-and lay everything on

the table, ugly as it seems,

and-and fess up

to what God already sees.

And then I can

really truly assess

what is the best future

for you.

Okay, son?

Yeah. Yeah.

Dear Heavenly Father,

today I ask your forgiveness

for my sins.

For a year, we lived together

under the cover

of being roommates.

But in reality, the whole time,

I was committing

the sin of sodomy.

And then my family

discovered the truth

and brought me back

to my senses.

They helped me realize

that I was fooling myself.

That I was being fooled.

That I was seduced

into a life of sin

by all sorts of sinful people.

And I knew in my heart

that I had forsaken Jesus

for Satan.

But now...

...I am awake to my sins.

I'm enlightened.

I'm here with all of you.

And I am disgusted at

the person that I once was.

I want to ask God

for his forgiveness,

and I want to thank

all of you guys,

especially you, Mr. Sykes,

for helping me get back

on the path to righteousness.

We love you, Gary.

Please don't do that, honey.

You know I don't...

Mom, who did that happen to

and when? Seriously.

Do you know?

Do you actually know

who that happened to?

It never happened.

Parents want to

protect their kids.

So they feed them lies.

I think that they're okay lies.

What? Like not telling me

how long I might be here for?

You know, the whole thing

you and Dad are paying for here

is all about how messed up

we are by our parents.

They want to know about you.

That's why you can't know

all about it,

'cause then they wouldn't

get their money out of you.

What have I ever

done to you? Hmm?

Talk about me all you want.

My conscience is clean.

Honey.

I'm gonna go for a run.

Is that okay, Mom?

Mm-hmm.

Fuck you!

Please, please

give me strength.

I need your help.

Amen.

I'm reading it. No debate.

I have a right to know

what they're teaching you.

I don't see why anyone

would read it

unless you absolutely had to.

I need to know what's inside.

There are tons of

spelling errors in it.

I almost want to mark up

a copy for them.

But that would take away

the only real enjoyment

you get from reading it,

'cause I guess it's... actually

not much fun to be there.

And I'm starting to wonder

whether it's really

gonna change me.

"We always come back

to Dog's true design."

Almighty Dog.

Welcome to God Versus Science.

Thank you.

Look up there...

Welcome to this exhibit.

Where are you from, Xavier?

I was born in Vienna.

I ended up in Canada,

and now I'm here.

Do you believe in God?

I do, yeah.

Wow.

I question it, but I still

believe in God, yeah.

Who created the Earth?

You like a little

small talk, huh?

Do you believe in the Devil?

Does he look like me?

I don't know.

Do you know Job from the Bible?

Not personally.

I hear he's not great company,

always complaining.

I-I imagine I'm him sometimes.

And that God and the Devil

are having a bet over me.

That one day

God will let-let me in

on the experiment

he was having to test me.

I think we're our own God.

I mean, I think he's in us.

In all of us, not... you know,

somewhere hiding and watching.

Stay with me.

Nothing needs to happen.

I swear.

I'll prove to you

that God won't strike you down.

You wronged me, Dad, and I...

- and I hate the way that...

- Louder, Cameron.

Can't hear you.

Come on. I'll bring him closer.

There he is.

You wronged me, Dad,

and I hate you for the way

that you, that you treated me

since you found out

about my problems.

No, about your sin. Say that.

"About my sins." Go!

"About my sins."

Come on, Cameron.

"My homosexual sins."

Come on, Cameron!

- Cameron!

- I can go.

- I don't, I don't mind...

- No, no, no, no.

Jared, everybody gets a turn.

This is Cameron's turn.

"About my sins!" Come on!

Found out about my sins.

I hate that you never listen

to me or acknowledge me.

And when you do acknowledge me,

it's to make fun of me

in front of my friends.

"It's to make fun of me."

To make fun of me

in front of my friends.

And that, and that time

that you told me

that you wished

I'd never been born?

That really hurt me.

Cameron...

now, you say that you're angry,

but, quite frankly,

I don't really see it.

Well, what's going on

in there, Cameron?

Huh?

Do you want to change?

Now, you're gonna wish

you hadn't have been born, son,

because God will not love you

the way that you are right now.

Unless you really

want to change.

Well? Come on.

Well, I guess not.

I guess not. Okay.

Let's take a break.

And you are gonna stay here

until you're ready to go!

Everybody but Cameron,

take a break.

I don't care

if you sit there all day, son.

Is this all a game to you?

What do you mean?

Listen, man.

You got to think about

why you went there.

You're trying to bail him out?

Seriously?

And touching him like that?

Do you think no one saw?

You saw him.

He was very upset.

- I didn't mean anything by it.

- I should report you.

True ownership, man. Okay?

This is what moral inventory

is all about.

And you got to quit

staring at me all the time.

These are the urges

that we got to stamp out.

Okay? You got to control this.

- Do you even want this to work?

- Of course I do.

We're all trying

to make this work.

I'm having a tough time, too,

just like you are.

Listen, I'm fine.

Doesn't seem like it.

Hey, what are you

doing in here alone?

You're meant to attend bathroom

breaks with a staff member.

What?

Now you don't have to pee?

Or are you gonna do

something solo?

That's why

they make them rules.

Not to be trusted.

Not at this stage of the game.

Hmm.

Sounds like Morse code.

Sending me a message...

faggot?

Starting to see it

for what it is?

Are you okay?

I'm fine. I'm fine.

I'm gonna give you some advice.

Play the part.

Show 'em it's working.

You're getting better.

Fake it until you make it,

right?

You don't want to end up

in one of those houses

for any length of time.

I've heard the stories,

and they're not good.

And that's where

you're likely gonna end up.

Sarah's already there.

So, play the part, man.

And then, once you're home,

you got to figure out

what to do next.

If it comes down to it,

you may have to walk away

from everything.

Everyone.

Thank you for today, Michael.

- See you tomorrow.

- Mm-hmm.

You're gonna be

on the podium any day now,

so you should have a plan.

Unless you really think

you can change.

Or even want to.

I don't want

to be here anymore.

It's a trial. It...

- I don't feel good here.

- Nobody feels good

- about you being there, Jared.

- I-I don't, I don't...

I'm not sure

if I feel any different.

Son, son, you're...

you're not even halfway through.

Why didn't you tell me

how long I might stay for?

None of us knows

the answer to that, Jared.

It's kind of up to you.

You know, you just got to

give it a chance.

This is like

the book of Matthew.

The Devil's not gonna

ask you once;

he's gonna ask you

over and over again, son.

And you have just got to find

the strength and commitment

inside you.

You can get through this, okay?

Okay?

- All right.

- It's late. Get some sleep.

- Good night.

Jared? You're gonna be late.

I had thoughts of men.

Boys at school.

At college, I...

My imagination.

Hey, what's going on?

I have no idea.

- Michael, what's going on?

- Just grab a tie.

Sadly, we are

gathered here today

to say farewell to our son,

- our friend and our brother...

- Okay.

...Cameron Van Heusen,

who, by his own making

last night,

fell prey to Satan's wishes.

Brother Van Heusen, is this

what you want for your son?

No.

Young man, is this you?

Brother Cameron,

is this what you want?

No.

Both of you, come on.

- Bring him down here.

- Let's go.

- Who's gonna strike this demon down?

- I will.

Out, you demon! Hit him!

Get out of him!

That's it.

- Out!

- Leave, demon! Leave!

Ow!

- Yeah. Wow.

- It wasn't so bad, actually.

Sarah, come on.

Stay with me.

I'll prove to you

that God won't strike you down.

All right, take your seat.

Welcome back, son.

Now, I don't know

about y'all, but today,

whew, I feel invigorated.

And I feel hopeful

and a true sense

that anything is possible today

in this room.

Cameron, how do you feel, son?

I feel great, sir.

Do you feel the true presence

of God in your heart?

Yes, sir.

And that feels great,

doesn't it?

Yes, sir, it-it does.

For sure.

Happy for you, son.

Moral inventory.

Jared, you're up, son.

Come on.

Come on, son.

All right. Michael.

And when you're ready.

I had thoughts of men.

Boys at school.

On TV, on the street,

in my imagination.

At college,

I held the hand of a boy,

and I stayed through the night

in his bed.

For these thoughts

and this action,

for which I felt regretful,

- I'd like to ask for God's...

- Wait. Wait. Hold on.

Jared.

Come on.

What else?

I never...

I-I stayed through the night

with the boy from college,

but we never did anything more.

Listen, don't even try

lying to God, Jared.

He already sees.

So, come on. What else?

Well...

I lied on my genogram.

My uncle Chris

wasn't an alcoholic.

Why don't you tell us

about this Henry boy?

That your daddy told me about.

That's not... that's not fair.

- Why not?

- That's-that's not my sin.

Do you want to waste

these people's time?

I'm not.

No, these people

who got up here honestly

and were brave and...

Well, I could

make something up.

I could make something up.

- Is that, is that what you...

- Yeah.

I-Is that what

you want me to do?

Isn't-isn't that a-a sin, too?

I mean,

if-if thoughts are a sin,

I ask God's forgiveness

for that,

but I'm not,

I'm not making anything up.

Okay, then. Okay.

Lie chair.

I just want to make use

of some of this anger.

Uh, wait.

Guys, just... just sit.

Just stay where you are, okay?

Here he is, Jared.

Your father is sitting here,

and I want to,

I want you to tell him

how affected you are by him

and how angry you are.

Tell him how you hate him

for the things that's he's,

the way he...

- Sit down. Sit down.

- But I'm not angry.

- And-and he's done things that upset me, but...

- Yeah, I know.

But you are. You just...

- You're angry, but you don't...

- He's let me down,

but why-why...

why do I have to be angry?

Just sit.

- Sit down.

- I'm not a dog!

- I know.

- And I don't think anyone is responsible for me,

so I don't see

how it's gonna help

picking someone

to blame or hate.

If you don't hate

anyone, Jared,

then where is all this anger

coming from?

Because you're

making me angry!

There you go!

I want you to use that!

I'm not gonna pretend

I hate my father.

- I don't hate my father.

- Jared, you do.

You don't know me!

You're all crazy!

- Hey! I didn't...

- All of you!

Just... Jared.

You're in my chair!

There you go!

- Jared!

- I hate you!

- But how does that help?!

- Jared.

Jared!

Who's in the front office?

Jared? Son, let's talk. Son?

Hey. Michael.

Hey, hey! Give it to me!

Michael.

- I want my things and I want to go.

- Hey, Jared. Michael!

Hey!

Hey! Michael!

Get out of the room!

Come here, son.

Jared? Hey, hey. Hey, listen.

What you're having is

a natural response, okay?

Just-just breathe.

Jared?

Hey, I just need a minute!

Be strong.

- Just go away.

- Take a minute, okay?

Please pick up, Mom.

- Jared?

- Mom.

- Jared?

- Mom, I need you to...

- I need you to come get me, please.

- What's the matter?

- What's the matter? What?

- Please, I'm in trouble.

What's happened?

Best thing that we can do is

probably get these guys

back to a session...

- Hey, son.

- I called my mom and she's coming to get me.

Listen, you got to understand

what you're going through

right now is just a moment.

- A moment? A moment?

- Okay? And I-I feel exactly

what you're going through.

I think that you and I

should just get everybody gone,

we just talk.

I don't want to talk.

I want to go.

Well, Jared,

I don't want you to.

I want you to stay.

Well, I-I read the rules,

and none of them say

you can stop me from leaving.

I wouldn't... Can you just check

where Brandon is, please?

And if you or anyone puts their

hands on me, I have witnesses.

Nobody's gonna put

their hands on you.

Why-why would anybody do that?

Come and sit.

We're gonna wait

for your mom, okay?

Jesus, our savior,

please focus on Jared.

Let him see the strength

and courage that he needs.

I want you to fill him

right now with

all the wisdom

of everybody in this room

to show him

how much they love him

and how much

they care about him...

- Be strong!

- ...and his journey into

the fire that

he's walking into

- and what he's willing to face.

- You are a man.

Let him open his eyes to see

the wisdom that you have...

- Jared!

- Mom!

Jared, honey,

what's happening?

- Mom! - What?

- Hey, hey! Sit back down!

Mom, they're not letting me go!

It's not that

we're not letting him go.

- Come on. Open this door.

- Just hold on, okay?

- Who are you?

- Mrs. Eamons, my name is Victor Sykes.

We spoke on the telephone.

I don't remember that.

Open the door.

- Well, I spoke with your husband a couple times.

- No.

Jared's just having

a moment here,

born out of

a role-playing exercise.

- Now be still. - It's fine.

- No, no!

That's not true.

Mom, tell him to open the door.

- You settle down.

- No. Enough. -

- Open the door now, Mr. Sykes.

- Shut up, okay?

- Listen, can we just all...

- I said open the door now!

I'm gonna call the police

if you don't open this door.

- There is no need for that. Listen, please.

- Jared!

Let him go!

- You all right, honey?

- Just let him go.

I just... I just think that...

Jared, come on.

I just... I think

it's more important for his...

development right now

that he...

- he would've stayed.

- Don't even listen to him.

Get in the car.

You're gonna ruin that child.

What are your actual

qualifications, Mr. Sykes?

I never asked. Hmm?

Are you a doctor? Are you?

Psychologist?

I mean, a proper one? Are you?

No. I didn't think so.

Oh.

Shame on you!

Shame on me, too.

Shame on you!

Can I help you?

Uh, I'm not sure

if I'm staying or going.

All right.

Well, let me know.

I talked to your father.

He wants you to go back.

I told him

we'll see him at home.

I told him you're not

going back.

You know that night...

when Pastor Wilkes and Jim

came to the house?

Those men decided what to do

with you, and I just...

I fell into line,

like I usually do.

They say sometimes

you got to hurt a child

in order to help them,

and that may be so

with some things, but...

a mother knows

when something isn't right.

And I knew in my bones...

this wasn't hurting to help.

I was just letting you down,

and I kept my mouth shut.

And I will always regret that.

But I can do

a different thing now,

now that I have a chance.

I'll handle your father.

He can fall into line with me

for a change.

Some folk,

they don't go to church

for the right reasons.

Now, you know the type

of person I'm talking about.

They just turn up.

They don't use every day

of their Christian life...

to praise the Lord

and to help bring others

to his word.

It might be your neighbor,

it might be your friend,

it might be just a face

you only ever see at church.

They just turn up.

I will tell you something

that I know.

Just turning up to church

does not make you a Christian!

- Yes, sir.

- Amen.

Study the Bible.

Study his word.

I guarantee you,

every question you have...

you gonna find an answer

in this book.

- Yes.

- Amen.

Honey,

um, do you know a boy,

um, Cameron Van Heusen?

Yeah. Is he here?

No. No, no.

That-That's the police.

Apparently,

this-this boy Cameron

killed himself last night.

They want to ask you

some questions.

Thank you.

- Hey!

- Hi!

- How are you?

- Hi. How you doing?

Yeah. Nice to see you!

I'm good.

Yeah, I think

they're in the dishwasher.

Come on, Chris.

Join us.

- Oh!

- Did you call it?

- I didn't hear you...

- Yes!

I didn't hear you call it.

- Mom...

- I gave it to him.

He has it and he'll read it.

He knows he has to.

M-Mom, it's important

he reads it.

Can you just put him on?

Well... I'm calling you

from Little Rock.

- I'm with Aunt Mary, so you...

- Wait. Why?

You should just

call him at home.

What happened?

Nothing. She just needed

some help with the shop,

so I came down here, and I'm

driving back tonight. I'm...

Nothing. Nothing is wrong.

Seriously, nothing is wrong.

Why didn't you tell me

you were coming?

Is he here?

He left. It is Sunday.

If it's urgent, you're

gonna have to go to church.

Why aren't you there?

Why aren't you at church?

I go, sometimes.

I-I support your dad,

and-and...

Mom, what's going on

with you two?

Jared, it's...

He knows.

I can't be around the...

I love God.

God loves me.

And I love my son.

That simple.

For your father,

it's a little more complicated.

I wish it wasn't, but it is.

Did you hear about

the article I've got

coming out in The Times?

Do you know what it's about?

I don't want to get

into a fight.

- Your mother told me, son.

- It's not a fight.

I'm just...

doing the right thing.

I'm letting you know.

I've written more,

and the publishers are

talking about me putting

together a whole book.

You don't need to read

any of it.

I just needed you to know

that-that it might

be out there.

Well... now I know.

But it might be good

for you to read.

Because you never really asked

what went on there.

You never really knew

the staff or...

- or...

- You're right. You're right.

When the situation came up,

I did what I've often done

in my life.

I sought the counsel

of wiser men,

and I followed their advice.

What would you do now?

Now that you're running things.

Enough.

Good night.

For me.

Is there something

you need help with?

'Cause, you know,

I got to make my flight.

Yeah, now, this was

gonna be for Christmas,

but, uh, well, you know,

your mother tells me

you like to drive upstate

sometimes to write.

Dad, I live in New York;

I don't need a car.

She also tells me...

you like to write by hand

before you use your computer.

Just like me.

This pen...

is made from a cedar tree

grown in Israel.

Guided me.

I've written every sermon

that I've ever delivered

in this new church

with this pen.

One writer to another.

I don't want

to pretend anymore.

We don't need

to spend time together.

We don't need to speak

unless we're gonna talk

to each other properly.

Like... you-you've done

some things

that have really hurt me.

Like-like you never,

you never asked

if there was more

to my story at college.

You never asked if I was okay.

You were too focused

on how it affected you.

There are so many things

that we've never spoken about.

And I don't know

if we ever will.

Yeah.

You know, all this

was gonna be yours.

I-I mean, it still will be,

but I meant to run and to...

make a living from.

I understand.

We all got our own paths.

The truth is

I want you to do well.

I want you to have

a great life.

I love you.

But I can't pretend, either.

There are things

I disagree with.

And I'll admit,

I'm gonna be honest,

I'm, you know...

I am being prideful

when I resent the fact that

I may never be a grandparent.

Now, that's just the truth.

It's hard for me to admit

that I have hurt you.

And that with my beliefs

and with all that's gone on,

I understand I-I may have

set myself up to lose you.

And I've had to ask myself,

and God,

if I'm ready for that.

I do not want to lose you.

Well, it doesn't feel like that.

I'm sick of avoiding you.

I'm sick of talking

about nothing.

I'm sick of it.

I'm gay, and I'm your son.

And neither of those things

are going to change.

Okay? So let's deal with that.

Or let's call it a day.

Both of us would be okay,

but that would be a shame.

I'm not changing.

There's no changing me.

God knows I tried.

So if you mean it...

if you really mean that...

...and you're not ready

to lose me...

then I'm sorry,

but you're gonna have to be

the one to change.

I understand.

I am gonna try.

I'll try.

I got to get going.

Dad...

I've invited Mom

to my place for Christmas.

Yeah.

You're welcome to come, too.

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Boy Erased (2018) - full transcript