Book of Love (2004) - full transcript

[Insects buzzing]

[insects buzzing]
[exotic flute music]

[insects buzzing]
[exotic flute music]

[hard rock music]

[hard rock music]

[hard rock music] >> Yeah!

>> Yeah!

>> Yeah!
Wahh!

Wahh!
Insanity,

Wahh!
Insanity, don't make a move, fool.

Insanity, don't make a move, fool.
>> Out of the way.



>> Welcome to varsity, Chet.

>> Welcome to varsity, Chet.
>> You're a big boy now.

>> Welcome to varsity, Chet.
>> You're a big boy now. >> You a big punk?

>> You're a big boy now.
>> You a big punk? Huh?

>> You a big punk?
Huh? [Laughter]

Huh?
[Laughter]

[laughter] splash!

Splash!
[Laughter]

splash!
[Laughter] >> [coughs]

[laughter] >> [coughs] >> If you're a student, they

>> [coughs] >> If you're a student,
they killed you.

>> If you're a student, they killed you.
A doctor, lawyer, musician,

killed you. A doctor, lawyer, musician,
artist--they killed you.

A doctor, lawyer, musician,
artist--they killed you. They killed you if you could



artist--they killed you.
They killed you if you could read, if you wore glasses.

They killed you if you could read,
if you wore glasses. >> Why didn't people just take

read, if you wore glasses.
>> Why didn't people just take off their glasses and hide them?

>> Why didn't people just take off their glasses and hide them?
That's what I would have done.

Off their glasses and hide them?
That's what I would have done. >> And you might have gotten

That's what I would have done.
>> And you might have gotten away with it.

>> And you might have gotten away with it.
But many people were betrayed by

away with it. But many people were betrayed by colleagues,
by neighbors,

But many people were betrayed by colleagues,
by neighbors, sometimes even family.

Colleagues, by neighbors,
sometimes even family. Students turned in their

sometimes even family.
Students turned in their teachers.

Students turned in their teachers.
>> Mr. Walker?

Teachers. >> Mr.
Walker? >> Uh, yes--

>> Mr. Walker?
>> Uh, yes-- Heather.

>> Uh, yes-- Heather.
>> The Khmer Rouge were

Heather.
>> The Khmer Rouge were Cambodians too?

>> The Khmer Rouge were Cambodians too?
>> That's correct.

Cambodians too?
>> That's correct. That's it.

>> That's correct.
That's it. Thank you.

That's it. Thank you.
Could you get the blinds,

Thank you.
Could you get the blinds, please?

Could you get the blinds, please?
The Khmer Rouge were a Communist

please?
The Khmer Rouge were a Communist faction that grew in size and

The Khmer Rouge were a Communist faction that
grew in size and power during the Vietnam War.

Faction that grew in size and power during the Vietnam War.
When they first marched through

power during the Vietnam War.
When they first marched through Phnom Penh, they were greeted

When they first marched through Phnom Penh,
they were greeted with cheers.

Phnom Penh, they were greeted with cheers.
People believed that they were

with cheers.
People believed that they were their liberators.

People believed that they were their liberators.
>> But if they were Cambodians

their liberators. >> But if they were Cambodians too,
why did they kill their own

>> But if they were Cambodians too,
why did they kill their own people?

Too, why did they kill their own people?
>> That's a good question,

people? >> That's a good question, Heather,
with a very complicated

>> That's a good question, Heather,
with a very complicated answer.

Heather, with a very complicated answer.
>> What's so complicated about

answer.
>> What's so complicated about right and wrong?

>> What's so complicated about right and wrong?
>> That is exactly the question

right and wrong?
>> That is exactly the question that we are gonna try and answer

>> That is exactly the question that we
are gonna try and answer this semester.

That we are gonna try and answer this semester.
Please do not forget your fall

this semester.
Please do not forget your fall reading list on your way out.

Please do not forget your fall reading list on your way out.
If you have any questions or

reading list on your way out.
If you have any questions or problems, my office hours are

If you have any questions or problems,
my office hours are posted on your curriculum

problems, my office hours are posted on your curriculum sheets.

Posted on your curriculum sheets.
Please feel free to stop by.

>> [Giggles slyly]

>> [giggles slyly]
>> Oh, come on.

>> [Giggles slyly] >> Oh, come on.
>> "Mr. Walker, what's so

>> Oh, come on. >> "Mr.
Walker, what's so complicated about right and

>> "Mr.
Walker, what's so complicated about right and wrong?"

Complicated about right and wrong?"
You're such a dork.

Wrong?" You're such a dork.
[Somber country music]

You're such a dork.
[Somber country music]

>> She fixed me a dinner

>> She fixed me a dinner
of sunflower seeds

>> She fixed me a dinner of sunflower seeds and ready-whipped topping

of sunflower seeds and ready-whipped topping inhalers.

And ready-whipped topping inhalers.
And take me down South

inhalers.
And take me down South with Hall and Oates

And take me down South with Hall and Oates in her mouth.

With Hall and Oates in her mouth.
My first love,

in her mouth. My first love,
my Joan Jett of Arc.

>> [Sighs]

>> [sighs]
[mouthing words silently]

>> [sighs] [mouthing words silently] No,
it's not negotiable.

[Mouthing words silently] No, it's not negotiable.
>> My black heart was heavy.

No, it's not negotiable. >> My black heart was heavy.
Her mom's Cougar was fast

>> My black heart was heavy.
Her mom's Cougar was fast as little pink houses

Her mom's Cougar was fast as little pink houses were whistled.

As little pink houses were whistled.
And it was all you can eat

were whistled.
And it was all you can eat at the Sizzler that night.

And it was all you can eat at the Sizzler that night.
My steak-burning

at the Sizzler that night.
My steak-burning Joan Jett of Arc.

My steak-burning
Joan Jett of Arc.

Joan Jett of Arc.
>> Okay, good.

>> Okay, good.
Mm-hmm.

>> And the shopping malls

>> And the shopping malls
and roller rinks

>> And the shopping malls and roller rinks all dim their lights.

And roller rinks all dim their lights.
Cicadas and crickets

all dim their lights.
Cicadas and crickets were silent.

Cicadas and crickets were silent.
And train tracks

were silent.
And train tracks like stitches

And train tracks like stitches skidding

like stitches skidding bicycle tires

skidding bicycle tires as I slipped

bicycle tires as I slipped in my Joan Jett of Arc.

As I slipped in my Joan Jett of Arc.
As I slipped

in my Joan Jett of Arc.
As I slipped in my Joan Jett of Arc.

As I slipped in my Joan Jett of Arc.
>> Eh.

In my Joan Jett of Arc.
>> Eh. >> [Chuckles]

>> Eh.
>> [Chuckles] >> [chuckles]

>> [snickers]

[snickers]

[bell jingles]

[bell jingles]
The more I sweat, the wetter I

[bell jingles] The more I sweat,
the wetter I get, the wetter I get, the

The more I sweat, the wetter I get,
the wetter I get, the better I sweat.

Get, the wetter I get, the better I sweat.
>> I've bet you've never met a

better I sweat. >> I've bet you've never met a better,
wetter sweater yet.

>> I've bet you've never met a better,
wetter sweater yet. Emily Dickinson?

Better, wetter sweater yet.
Emily Dickinson? >> Yeah.

Emily Dickinson? >> Yeah.
>> What'll it be, folks?

>> Yeah. >> What'll it be, folks?
>> Folks?

>> What'll it be, folks? >> Folks?
>> Uh, what flavors have you got

>> Folks? >> Uh,
what flavors have you got today?

>> Uh, what flavors have you got today?
>> Uh, French vanilla, mocha

today? >> Uh, French vanilla,
mocha chip, peanut butter dream,

>> Uh, French vanilla, mocha chip,
peanut butter dream, coconut--

chip, peanut butter dream,
coconut-- >> No fair looking.

Coconut-- >> No fair looking.
>> Coconut cream, mint chip,

>> No fair looking. >> Coconut cream,
mint chip, coffee fudge, hazelnut, green

>> Coconut cream, mint chip, coffee fudge, hazelnut,
green tea, ginger, rocky road, mango,

coffee fudge, hazelnut, green tea, ginger,
rocky road, mango, chocolate.

Tea, ginger,
rocky road, mango, chocolate. >> Mango.

Chocolate. >> Mango.
Is it real mango?

>> Mango. Is it real mango?
>> What do you mean by "real"?

Is it real mango? >> What do you mean by "real"?
>> I mean, do you make it here?

>> What do you mean by "real"? >> I mean,
do you make it here? >> I don't make anything.

>> I mean, do you make it here?
>> I don't make anything. I just scoop it.

>> I don't make anything. I just scoop it.
>> I'll take a single scoop of

I just scoop it.
>> I'll take a single scoop of mango, please.

>> There you go.

>> There you go.
>> Oh, thank you.

>> There you go. >> Oh,
thank you. >> Just a glass of water.

>> Oh, thank you.
>> Just a glass of water. Please.

>> Just a glass of water.
Please. >> Air conditioner died.

Please. >> Air conditioner died.
>> Why are you wearing a

>> Air conditioner died.
>> Why are you wearing a sweatshirt?

>> Why are you wearing a sweatshirt?
>> I don't know.

Sweatshirt? >> I don't know.
I should probably take it off.

>> I don't know. I should probably take it off.
>> You should take it off.

I should probably take it off.
>> You should take it off. >> Take it off.

Oh, come on.

Oh, come on.
Come on.

Oh, come on.
Come on. >> What?

Come on. >> What?
>> You always--she always

>> What?
>> You always--she always does this.

>> You always--she always does this.
>> I do.

Does this. >> I do.
>> Can I get another cone,

>> I do.
>> Can I get another cone, please?

>> Can I get another cone, please?
>> Yeah.

Please? >> Yeah.
>> Mango reminds me of Cambodia.

>> Yeah. >> Mango reminds me of Cambodia.
We went on our honeymoon.

>> Mango reminds me of Cambodia.
We went on our honeymoon. I went mad for mangoes.

We went on our honeymoon.
I went mad for mangoes. >> They're still talking about

I went mad for mangoes.
>> They're still talking about her in Phnom Penh.

>> They're still talking about her in Phnom Penh.
>> Phnom Penh is the--

her in Phnom Penh.
>> Phnom Penh is the-- >> Capital of Cambodia since the

>> Phnom Penh is the-- >> Capital of Cambodia since the 15th century?

>> Capital of Cambodia since the 15th century?
Oh, we studied Southeast Asia

15th century?
Oh, we studied Southeast Asia last year.

Oh, we studied Southeast Asia last year.
I like history.

Last year. I like history.
>> I teach history.

I like history.
>> I teach history. >> Cool.

>> I teach history. >> Cool.
>> At the Royce Academy.

>> Cool. >> At the Royce Academy.
It's a private girls' school.

>> At the Royce Academy. It's a private girls' school.
>> Dave's a very gifted teacher.

It's a private girls' school.
>> Dave's a very gifted teacher. Well, you are.

>> Dave's a very gifted teacher.
Well, you are. He is.

Well, you are. He is.
>> There you go.

He is. >> There you go.
>> Oh, you didn't have to

>> Oh, you didn't have to give me-- >> Aw,
it's on the house.

Give me-- >> Aw, it's on the house.
>> Oh, thank you, uh--

>> Aw, it's on the house.
>> Oh, thank you, uh-- Chet.

>> Oh, thank you, uh-- Chet.
>> You just made a friend for

Chet.
>> You just made a friend for life.

>> You just made a friend for life.
>> [Chuckles]

life.
>> [Chuckles] [girls chatting outside]

>> [chuckles] [girls chatting outside] >> Mr.
Walker?

[Girls chatting outside] >> Mr.
Walker? >> Yeah?

>> Mr. Walker? >> Yeah?
>> I saw on TV that we won't

>> Yeah?
>> I saw on TV that we won't support a ban on land mines, and

>> I saw on TV that we won't support a ban on land mines,
and that article you gave us says

support a ban on land mines,
and that article you gave us says that in Cambodia, every single

that article you gave us says that in Cambodia,
every single day, someone, like, steps on a

that in Cambodia, every single day, someone, like,
steps on a land mine, and it gets their

day, someone, like, steps on a land mine,
and it gets their legs blown off.

Land mine, and it gets their legs blown off.
You know, like farmers and

legs blown off. You know,
like farmers and children, and that makes

You know, like farmers and children,
and that makes America--

children, and that makes America-- a bad country,
doesn't it?

America-- a bad country, doesn't it?
>> Well, you can't categorize a

a bad country, doesn't it? >> Well,
you can't categorize a country or its people as simply

>> Well,
you can't categorize a country or its people as simply good or bad.

Country or its people as simply good or bad.
There are contexts and

good or bad.
There are contexts and circumstances.

There are contexts and circumstances.
You sympathize with the

circumstances.
You sympathize with the Cambodian people, right?

You sympathize with the Cambodian people, right?
>> Of course I do.

Cambodian people, right?
>> Of course I do. >> They're good people?

>> Of course I do. >> They're good people?
>> They're so poor, they hardly

>> They're good people? >> They're so poor,
they hardly have anything.

>> They're so poor, they hardly have anything.
>> Most of the Khmer Rouge

have anything.
>> Most of the Khmer Rouge soldiers were in fact Cambodian

>> Most of the Khmer Rouge soldiers were in
fact Cambodian peasants who joined up out of

soldiers were in fact Cambodian peasants
who joined up out of necessity, and they were

peasants who joined up out of necessity,
and they were uneducated, hungry, afraid.

Necessity, and they were uneducated, hungry, afraid.
And how can anyone know what

uneducated, hungry, afraid.
And how can anyone know what they'd do if someone held a gun

And how can anyone know what they'd
do if someone held a gun to their head?

They'd do if someone held a gun to their head?
>> Mr. Walker?

To their head? >> Mr.
Walker? >> Yeah.

>> Mr. Walker? >> Yeah.
>> Is your wife pretty?

[Jangly rock music]

[jangly rock music]
>> Love is only

[jangly rock music] >> Love is only for the lovely,

>> Love is only for the lovely,
and such

for the lovely,
and such a glamorous thing

and such a glamorous thing to waste.

A glamorous thing to waste.
Wait,

to waste.
Wait, I have to fix my makeup.

Wait, I have to fix my makeup.
Wait.

I have to fix my makeup.
Wait.

>> Elaine.

>> Elaine.
>> [Giggles]

>> Elaine.
>> [Giggles] >> Straighten that leg you're

>> [giggles] >> Straighten that leg you're standing on,
all right?

>> Straighten that leg you're standing on,
all right? Don't sink in at the hip.

Standing on, all right?
Don't sink in at the hip. Lift up.

Don't sink in at the hip.
Lift up. Up...

Lift up.
Up... Up...

Up... Up... Good.

Up... Good.
>> Come on, come on.

Good. >> Come on,
come on. One more rep.

>> Come on, come on.
One more rep. >> You got a cramp?

One more rep. >> You got a cramp?
You're breaking your own record

>> You got a cramp?
You're breaking your own record this morning back there.

You're breaking your own record this morning back there.
Keep it up, buddy.

This morning back there.
Keep it up, buddy. >> Full extension, full

Keep it up, buddy.
>> Full extension, full extension.

>> Full extension,
full extension. Come on, Rico.

Extension.
Come on, Rico. Come on.

Come on, Rico.
Come on. 1:35.

Come on.
1:35. >> Yo.

1:35. >> Yo. >> Yo, Chet,
wait up, man.

>> Yo. >> Yo, Chet,
wait up, man. >> I'm waiting.

>> Yo, Chet, wait up, man.
>> I'm waiting. I'm waiting.

>> I'm waiting. I'm waiting.
>> Where you at, bro?

I'm waiting. >> Where you at, bro?
>> Got to go to work.

[Bells jingle]

[bells jingle]
>> Ice cream, ice cream.

[Bells jingle] >> Ice cream, ice cream.
I'm gonna swoon from this heat

>> Ice cream, ice cream.
I'm gonna swoon from this heat if I don't have some ice cream

I'm gonna swoon from this heat if I
don't have some ice cream immediately.

If I don't have some ice cream immediately.
>> Hey, Dave.

Immediately.
>> Hey, Dave. Hey.

>> Hey, Dave.
Hey. >> Elaine.

Hey. >> Elaine. At least,
I was Elaine before

>> Elaine. At least,
I was Elaine before this heat sucked all the

At least,
I was Elaine before this heat sucked all the moisture from my body.

This heat sucked all the moisture from my body.
[Exhales]

moisture from my body.
[Exhales] You think I'm a mad old lady.

[Exhales] You think I'm a mad old lady.
>> No.

You think I'm a mad old lady.
>> No. Well, no.

>> No. Well, no.
>> Admit it.

Well, no. >> Admit it.
I look ancient to you.

>> Admit it. I look ancient to you.
>> No, I think you look--

I look ancient to you. >> No,
I think you look-- >> Guess.

>> No, I think you look-- >> Guess.
>> Guess what?

>> Guess. >> Guess what?
>> My age.

>> Guess what?
>> My age. >> Uh-oh.

>> My age. >> Uh-oh.
>> I don't know.

>> Uh-oh. >> I don't know.
I'm not really good at--

>> I don't know.
I'm not really good at-- >> No, come on--

I'm not really good at-- >> No,
come on-- Okay, if you're wrong, our cones

>> No, come on-- Okay, if you're wrong,
our cones are free, and I'm gonna give you

Okay, if you're wrong, our cones are free,
and I'm gonna give you a two-year handicap.

Are free, and I'm gonna give you a two-year handicap.
It'll be fun.

A two-year handicap.
It'll be fun. Take your time.

It'll be fun. Take your time.
>> I don't know, I mean--

Take your time.
>> I don't know, I mean-- 30?

>> I don't know,
I mean-- 30? >> [Mock sighs]

30?
>> [Mock sighs] Start scooping.

>> [Mock sighs] Start scooping.
>> I told you I wasn't good at

Start scooping.
>> I told you I wasn't good at ages.

>> I told you I wasn't good at ages.
>> I'm 27.

Ages. >> I'm 27.
>> [Chuckles]

>> I'm 27.
>> [Chuckles] [clears throat]

>> [chuckles] [clears throat] >> Yeah,
I suppose there's not

[clears throat] >> Yeah,
I suppose there's not much difference between 27 and

>> Yeah, I suppose there's not much difference
between 27 and 30 in the eyes of a kid, right?

Much difference between 27 and 30 in the eyes of a kid, right?
>> I'm not a kid.

30 in the eyes of a kid, right?
>> I'm not a kid. I'm 16.

>> I'm not a kid.
I'm 16. >> Oh.

I'm 16. >> Oh.
>> Almost 16.

>> Oh. >> Almost 16.
>> A double coconut-mango.

>> Almost 16. >> A double coconut-mango.
>> I'll have a peach, please.

>> A double coconut-mango.
>> I'll have a peach, please. >> I'm 28.

>> I'll have a peach, please.
>> I'm 28. Just.

>> I'm 28. Just.
>> We'll eat in here.

Just. >> We'll eat in here.
I don't want to drip all over

>> We'll eat in here.
I don't want to drip all over the car.

I don't want to drip all over the car.
>> Okay.

The car.
>> Okay. >> Mm.

>> Okay.
>> Mm. Good.

>> Mm. Good.
>> There you go.

Good. >> There you go.
>> Thank you.

>> There you go.
>> Thank you. >> That's okay.

>> Thank you.
>> That's okay. >> You sure?

>> That's okay.
>> You sure? >> Yeah.

>> You sure?
>> Yeah. >> Mm.

>> Yeah. >> Mm.
>> Thank you.

>> Mm. >> Thank you.
So you guys are going out

>> Thank you.
So you guys are going out tonight?

So you guys are going out tonight?
>> Yes, my beautiful, weird wife

tonight? >> Yes, my beautiful,
weird wife is taking me to the city this

>> Yes, my beautiful,
weird wife is taking me to the city this evening.

Is taking me to the city this evening.
>> Our friends are singing at a

evening.
>> Our friends are singing at a club.

>> Our friends are singing at a club.
>> Cool.

Club. >> Cool.
>> You like the city, Chet?

>> Cool. >> You like the city, Chet?
>> I don't know.

>> You like the city, Chet?
>> I don't know. I've never been.

>> I don't know.
I've never been. >> Really?

I've never been.
>> Really? >> In your life?

>> Elaine has a great singing

>> Elaine has a great singing
voice.

>> Elaine has a great singing voice.
She had one of the best voices

voice.
She had one of the best voices at NYU.

She had one of the best voices at NYU.
>> I did not.

At NYU. >> I did not.
>> Are you gonna sing tonight?

>> I did not.
>> Are you gonna sing tonight? >> No, no.

>> Are you gonna sing tonight?
>> No, no. I've given all that up.

>> No, no.
I've given all that up. >> Why?

I've given all that up. >> Why?
>> Well, because she's a very

>> Why? >> Well,
because she's a very successful businesswoman now.

>> Well, because she's a very successful businesswoman now.
She's an event planner.

Successful businesswoman now.
She's an event planner. >> Cool, what's that?

She's an event planner. >> Cool,
what's that? >> I, um, I--

>> Cool, what's that? >> I, um,
I-- >> She plans events, parties.

>> I, um, I-- >> She plans events, parties.
>> I plan things.

>> She plans events, parties.
>> I plan things. >> Erato and Oprah

>> I plan things.
>> Erato and Oprah and Uma and Dave

>> Erato and Oprah and Uma and Dave and Godzilla

and Uma and Dave and Godzilla all out dancing at a rave.

And Godzilla all out dancing at a rave.
Dave gave a vitamin

all out dancing at a rave.
Dave gave a vitamin to Oprah that day,

Dave gave a vitamin to Oprah that day,
then she fainted.

To Oprah that day, then she fainted.
And then all the lights

then she fainted.
And then all the lights in the auditorium came up,

And then all the lights in the auditorium came up,
and everyone

in the auditorium came up,
and everyone started singing.

And everyone started singing.
>> Oh, no!

Started singing. >> Oh, no!
>> Jesus, help me now.

>> Oh, no! >> Jesus,
help me now. Lord, I'm dying, dying

>> Jesus, help me now. Lord, I'm dying,
dying and Satan doth prowl.

Lord, I'm dying, dying and Satan doth prowl.
Oh, Jesus, help me now.

And Satan doth prowl. Oh, Jesus,
help me now. Lord, I'm dying.

Oh, Jesus, help me now.
Lord, I'm dying. Oh, no, dying.

Lord, I'm dying. Oh, no, dying.
>> [Whispering inaudibly]

Oh, no, dying.
>> [Whispering inaudibly] >> Gauguin and Escher

>> [whispering inaudibly] >> Gauguin
and Escher and Stein and Man Ray

>> Gauguin and Escher and Stein and Man Ray and Godzilla

and Stein and Man Ray and Godzilla all our for burgers

and Godzilla all our for burgers one day.

All our for burgers one day.
Somehow instead

one day.
Somehow instead they wound up in LA,

Somehow instead they wound up in LA,
and they hated it.

They wound up in LA,
and they hated it. [Laughter]

and they hated it.
[Laughter] >> Of course they would.

[Laughter] >> Of course they would.
>> You're right.

>> Of course they would.
>> You're right. >> Okay, sing.

>> You're right. >> Okay, sing.
>> Oh, Jesus, help me now.

>> Okay, sing. >> Oh, Jesus,
help me now. Lord, I'm dying.

>> Oh, Jesus, help me now.
Lord, I'm dying. I'm dying.

Lord, I'm dying. I'm dying.
Satan doth prowl.

I'm dying. Satan doth prowl.
Oh, Jesus, help me now.

Satan doth prowl. Oh, Jesus,
help me now. Lord, I'm dying.

Oh, Jesus, help me now.
Lord, I'm dying. Oh, no.

Lord, I'm dying.
Oh, no. Dying.

Oh, no. Dying.
[Cheers and applause]

Dying.
[Cheers and applause] [mouthing words inaudibly]

[cheers and applause] [mouthing words inaudibly] >> You have to.

>> Uh, this is--

>> Uh, this is--
This is for my husband, Dave.

>> Uh, this is-- This is for my husband, Dave.
[Gentle guitar playing]

This is for my husband, Dave.
[Gentle guitar playing]

[gentle guitar playing] The Book of Love

The Book of Love
is long and boring.

The Book of Love is long and boring.
No one can lift

is long and boring.
No one can lift the damn thing.

No one can lift the damn thing.
It's full of charts

the damn thing.
It's full of charts and facts and figures

It's full of charts and facts and figures and instructions

and facts and figures and instructions for dancing.

And instructions for dancing.
But I...

for dancing.
But I... I love it

But I...
I love it when you read to me,

I love it when you read to me,
And you...

when you read to me, And you...
You can read me anything.

And you... You can read me anything.
The Book of Love

You can read me anything.
The Book of Love is long and boring

The Book of Love is long and boring and written very long ago.

Is long and boring and written very long ago.
It's full of flowers

and written very long ago.
It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes

It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes and things we're all

and heart-shaped boxes and things we're all too young to know.

And things we're all too young to know.
But I...

too young to know.
But I... I love it

But I...
I love it when you give me things.

I love it when you give me things.
And you...

when you give me things.
And you... You are to give me

And you...
You are to give me wedding rings.

You are to give me wedding rings.
And you are to give me

wedding rings.
And you are to give me wedding rings.

And you are to give me wedding rings.
And you are to give me

wedding rings.
And you are to give me wedding rings.

And you are to give me wedding rings.
[Chuckles]

wedding rings.
[Chuckles] [cheers and applause]

>> Sleep tight.

>> Sleep tight.
>> Good night.

>> Sleep tight. >> Good night.
>> Thanks, guys.

[Jangly guitar music playing]

[jangly guitar music playing]
>> [singing unintelligibly]

[jangly guitar music playing]
>> [singing unintelligibly]

>> Chet told me the oddest

>> Chet told me the oddest
thing.

>> Chet told me the oddest thing.
Did you know that human beings

thing.
Did you know that human beings are the only mammals that can't

Did you know that human beings are the only
mammals that can't simultaneously drink and

are the only mammals that can't simultaneously
drink and breathe at the same time?

Simultaneously drink and breathe at the same time?
>> That's redundant.

Breathe at the same time? >> That's redundant.
>> Drinking and breathing?

>> That's redundant. >> Drinking and breathing?
>> "Simultaneously" and "at the

>> Drinking and breathing?
>> "Simultaneously" and "at the same time."

>> [Spits]

>> [spits]
[giggles]

>> [spits] [giggles] Whoops.

[Giggles] Whoops.
I invited him for dinner

Whoops.
I invited him for dinner tomorrow night.

We don't have any plans.

I feel sorry for him.

I feel sorry for him.
His mother just picked up

I feel sorry for him.
His mother just picked up and left when he was 12.

His mother just picked up and left when he was 12.
>> Jesus.

And left when he was 12. >> Jesus.
>> His father works nights.

>> Jesus. >> His father works nights.
He's hardly ever home.

>> His father works nights. He's hardly ever home.
>> No brothers and sisters?

He's hardly ever home. >> No brothers and sisters?
>> He's practically an orphan.

>> No brothers and sisters? >> He's practically an orphan.
>> You want us to adopt him?

>> He's practically an orphan. >> You want us to adopt him?
>> He's helping me design a menu

>> You want us to adopt him?
>> He's helping me design a menu for that space conference.

>> He's helping me design a menu for that space conference.
You know, the scientists

for that space conference. You know,
the scientists obsessed with the Mars colony.

You know,
the scientists obsessed with the Mars colony. >> Oh.

Obsessed with the Mars colony.
>> Oh. >> Chet knows all about space

>> Oh.
>> Chet knows all about space food.

>> Chet knows all about space food.
All his weird subjects.

Food. All his weird subjects.
>> Right.

All his weird subjects. >> Right.
>> You're gonna be our guinea

>> Right.
>> You're gonna be our guinea pig.

>> You're gonna be our guinea pig.
[Both chuckle]

pig.
[Both chuckle] >> Why don't we invite some

[both chuckle] >> Why don't we invite some friends and have a party?

>> Why don't we invite some friends and have a party?
>> You know no one will come out

friends and have a party?
>> You know no one will come out from the city--

>> You know no one will come out from the city-- >> [together]

from the city-- >> [together] On a Saturday night.

>> [Together] On a Saturday night.
If we only had a pool.

On a Saturday night.
If we only had a pool. >> Oh, God.

If we only had a pool. >> Oh, God.
Am I that predictable?

>> Oh, God. Am I that predictable?
>> We could have a child of our

Am I that predictable?
>> We could have a child of our own, you know.

>> We could have a child of our own,
you know. >> David.

Own, you know. >> David.
A few more years.

>> David.
A few more years. Ten.

A few more years.
Ten. [Chuckles]

[sighs]

[chimes tinkling]

[doorbell rings]

[doorbell rings]
>> I'm coming!

>> Oh...

>> Oh...
Thank you.

>> Oh... Thank you.
Oh, they're beautiful.

>> [Chuckles]

>> [chuckles]
>> [giggles softly]

>> [chuckles] >> [giggles softly] Oh,
could you go to the store

>> [giggles softly] Oh,
could you go to the store with David?

Oh, could you go to the store with David?
I forgot the red peppers.

With David? I forgot the red peppers.
>> Yeah, yeah, sure.

I forgot the red peppers. >> Yeah, yeah, sure.
>> Um, come in, come in.

>> Yeah, yeah, sure. >> Um,
come in, come in. David?

>> Um, come in, come in. David?
Can you find something more

David?
Can you find something more comfortable for Chet to put on?

Can you find something more comfortable for Chet to put on?
>> Stung Treng, Cambodia.

Comfortable for Chet to put on?
>> Stung Treng, Cambodia. >> What's that--a G?

>> Stung Treng, Cambodia.
>> What's that--a G? >> G.

>> What's that--a G?
>> G. >> Watch out.

>> G. >> Watch out.
>> G, G, G...

>> Watch out. >> G, G,
G... Gravata, Spain.

>> G, G, G... Gravata, Spain.
>> Look over your right

Gravata, Spain.
>> Look over your right shoulder when you reverse.

>> Look over your right shoulder when you reverse.
>> Appalachia National Park.

Shoulder when you reverse.
>> Appalachia National Park. K.

>> Appalachia National Park.
K. >> Kawasaki.

K. >> Kawasaki.
>> The motorcycle?

>> Kawasaki. >> The motorcycle?
>> Nah, it's a place too.

>> The motorcycle? >> Nah,
it's a place too. >> I was just testing you.

>> Nah, it's a place too.
>> I was just testing you. >> All right.

>> I was just testing you.
>> All right. >> Right shoulder.

>> All right.
>> Right shoulder. Ithaca.

>> Right shoulder. Ithaca.
Greece and upstate New York.

Ithaca. Greece and upstate New York.
That's double points.

Greece and upstate New York.
That's double points. >> You can't do that!

That's double points.
>> You can't do that! [Tires skid]

>> You can't do that!
[Tires skid] >> Game's over.

[Tires skid] >> Game's over.
[Blender running]

[country music playing faintly]

[country music playing faintly]

>> [laughs triumphantly]

>> [laughs triumphantly]
I won.

>> [Laughs triumphantly] I won.
>> Barely.

I won. >> Barely.
Best of three.

>> Barely. Best of three.
>> Nah, I don't think so.

Best of three. >> Nah, I don't think so.
>> Organic, healthy, and

>> Nah, I don't think so. >> Organic, healthy,
and could be hydroponically grown.

>> Organic, healthy, and could be hydroponically grown.
It's got everything on our menu.

Could be hydroponically grown.
It's got everything on our menu. Eat me.

It's got everything on our menu.
Eat me. Please eat me.

Eat me. Please eat me.
Mmm-mm.

Please eat me.
Mmm-mm. >> Thank you.

Mmm-mm.
>> Thank you. >> Mmm.

>> Thank you. >> Mmm.
>> Hey, uh, Chet says that on

>> Mmm. >> Hey, uh,
Chet says that on Mars they'll grow their produce

>> Hey, uh,
Chet says that on Mars they'll grow their produce in human waste.

Mars they'll grow their produce in human waste.
>> Purified.

In human waste. >> Purified.
I mean, everything has to be

>> Purified. I mean,
everything has to be purified.

I mean, everything has to be purified.
It'll take spaceships at least

purified.
It'll take spaceships at least six months to get there.

It'll take spaceships at least six months to get there.
>> Imagine the jet lag.

Six months to get there. >> Imagine the jet lag.
Our flight to Cambodia was bad

>> Imagine the jet lag.
Our flight to Cambodia was bad enough.

Our flight to Cambodia was bad enough.
But you have to go to Cambodia.

Enough. But you have to go to Cambodia.
>> Oh, it's great.

But you have to go to Cambodia.
>> Oh, it's great. >> I'd like to.

>> Oh, it's great. >> I'd like to.
>> Remember those luscious

>> I'd like to.
>> Remember those luscious strawberries that we bought in

>> Remember those luscious strawberries
that we bought in the market in Phnom Penh?

Strawberries that we bought in the market in Phnom Penh?
The hill tribe people grow them.

The market in Phnom Penh?
The hill tribe people grow them. Oh...

The hill tribe people grow them.
Oh... You should see these people.

Oh... You should see these people.
The wonderful way that they

You should see these people.
The wonderful way that they dress, and their clothes are

The wonderful way that they dress,
and their clothes are woven with beads and silver.

Dress, and their clothes are woven with beads and silver.
And the women have these long,

woven with beads and silver.
And the women have these long, long necks.

And the women have these long,
long necks. They could've come from Mars.

Long necks. They could've come from Mars.
Not at all like our idea of

They could've come from Mars.
Not at all like our idea of people.

Not at all like our idea of people.
>> What's your idea of people?

People. >> What's your idea of people?
>> That's a very good question.

>> What's your idea of people?
>> That's a very good question. Elaine?

>> That's a very good question.
Elaine? >> I don't know, like, you're my

Elaine? >> I don't know, like,
you're my idea of people.

>> I don't know, like,
you're my idea of people. >> [Chuckles]

idea of people.
>> [Chuckles] >> Our friends are my idea of

>> [chuckles] >> Our friends are my idea of people.

>> Our friends are my idea of people.
>> Two arms, two legs, walks

people. >> Two arms,
two legs, walks upright.

>> Two arms, two legs,
walks upright. >> [Laughs]

upright.
>> [Laughs] Makes love.

>> [Laughs] Makes love.
>> Makes a very nice dinner.

Makes love.
>> Makes a very nice dinner. Thank you.

>> Makes a very nice dinner.
Thank you. >> Eats in nice restaurants.

Thank you. >> Eats in nice restaurants.
>> Reads the Times.

>> Eats in nice restaurants. >> Reads the Times.
>> Can talk about books and

>> Reads the Times.
>> Can talk about books and movies and theater

>> Can talk about books and movies and theater intelligently.

Movies and theater intelligently.
>> Needs two strong cups of

intelligently.
>> Needs two strong cups of coffee every morning to get out

>> Needs two strong cups of coffee every morning to get out of bed.

Coffee every morning to get out of bed.
>> [Chuckles]

of bed. >> [Chuckles] >> Oh,
I love this song.

>> [Chuckles] >> Oh, I love this song.
Needs two glasses of wine to

>> Oh, I love this song.
Needs two glasses of wine to relax at night.

Needs two glasses of wine to relax at night.
My idea of people drinks wine.

Relax at night.
My idea of people drinks wine. >> Cheers.

My idea of people drinks wine.
>> Cheers. >> Cheers.

>> Cheers. >> Cheers.
>> [Humming along to music]

>> Cheers.
>> [Humming along to music] >> Let's pretend

>> [humming along to music] >> Let's pretend this song won't end

>> Let's pretend this song won't end and we never

this song won't end and we never have to go home.

And we never have to go home.
>> My idea of people dances with

have to go home.
>> My idea of people dances with her handsome husband.

>> My idea of people dances with her handsome husband.
Come on!

Her handsome husband.
Come on! >> And nothing matters

Come on!
>> And nothing matters when we're dancing.

>> And nothing matters when we're dancing.
In tat or tatters,

when we're dancing.
In tat or tatters, you're entrancing.

In tat or tatters,
you're entrancing. Be we in Paris

you're entrancing.
Be we in Paris or in Lansing,

Be we in Paris or in Lansing,
nothing matters

or in Lansing,
nothing matters when we're dancing.

Nothing matters when we're dancing.
>> [Humming to music]

when we're dancing.
>> [Humming to music]

>> You've never

>> You've never
been more beautiful,

>> You've never been more beautiful,
your eyes

been more beautiful,
your eyes like two full moons.

Your eyes like two full moons.
As here

like two full moons.
As here in this poor

As here in this poor old dance hall--

in this poor old dance hall-- >> Come on.

Old dance hall-- >> Come on.
Let's see what you got.

>> Come on. Let's see what you got.
>> [Chuckles]

Let's see what you got.
>> [Chuckles] Will you take me to Cambodia?

>> [Chuckles] Will you take me to Cambodia?
>> Oh, Chet, it's so far away.

Will you take me to Cambodia? >> Oh, Chet,
it's so far away. Why don't you pick someplace

>> Oh, Chet, it's so far away.
Why don't you pick someplace closer?

Why don't you pick someplace closer?
>> Where else do you want to go?

Closer? >> Where else do you want to go?
>> What, me?

>> Where else do you want to go?
>> What, me? >> Yeah.

>> What, me?
>> Yeah. You.

>> Yeah. You.
>> Disney World.

You. >> Disney World.
>> [Laughs]

>> Disney World.
>> [Laughs] >> What?

>> [Laughs] >> What?
>> You're joking.

>> What?
>> You're joking. >> No.

>> You're joking. >> No.
>> Don't you want to go

>> No.
>> Don't you want to go somewhere more

>> Don't you want to go somewhere
more eco-vegan-Greenpeace-esque?

Somewhere more eco-vegan-Greenpeace-esque?
>> Someplace a little more

eco-vegan-Greenpeace-esque?
>> Someplace a little more exotic?

>> Someplace a little more exotic?
>> Disney World is exotic to me.

Exotic? >> Disney World is exotic to me.
I've never been anywhere.

>> Disney World is exotic to me.
I've never been anywhere. I've never even been on an

I've never been anywhere.
I've never even been on an airplane.

I've never even been on an airplane.
>> Oh, that is so sad.

Airplane. >> Oh,
that is so sad. [Giggles]

>> Oh, that is so sad.
[Giggles] We should take him.

[Giggles] We should take him.
>> You should take me.

We should take him.
>> You should take me. >> [Laughs]

>> You should take me.
>> [Laughs] Disney World.

>> [Laughs] Disney World.
>> Yes.

Disney World. >> Yes.
[Exotic flute music]

>> Yes.
[Exotic flute music]

>> I bought it in the

>> I bought it in the
marketplace from this woman.

>> I bought it in the marketplace from this woman.
She wove the cloth herself.

Marketplace from this woman.
She wove the cloth herself. She was so lovely.

At first, I hated Cambodia.

At first, I hated Cambodia.
I didn't understand it.

At first, I hated Cambodia.
I didn't understand it. Made me cry.

I didn't understand it. Made me cry.
Everywhere we went, there were--

Made me cry. Everywhere we went,
there were-- people with limbs missing.

Everywhere we went, there were-- people with limbs missing.
>> Leftover land mines.

[Both laugh]

[both laugh]
>> David?

[Both laugh] >> David?
[Both laugh]

>> David?
[Both laugh] David?

You shouldn't be here with us

You shouldn't be here with us
on a Saturday night.

You shouldn't be here with us on a Saturday night.
You should be out with friends

on a Saturday night.
You should be out with friends your own age.

You should be out with friends your own age.
>> You're my friend.

Your own age. >> You're my friend.
Dave's my friend.

>> You're my friend. Dave's my friend.
Age isn't important, right?

Dave's my friend. Age isn't important, right?
We're all just people.

Age isn't important, right?
We're all just people. >> Right.

We're all just people.
>> Right. People people.

>> Right. People people.
>> People people.

People people.
>> People people. >> [Chuckles]

>> People people.
>> [Chuckles] So what's your idea of people?

>> [Chuckles] So what's your idea of people?
>> I don't know.

So what's your idea of people?
>> I don't know. Uh, they want to be useful.

>> I don't know. Uh, they want to be useful.
They want to do good things.

Uh, they want to be useful. They want to do good things.
They want to not hurt anybody.

They want to do good things.
They want to not hurt anybody. Or be hurt.

They want to not hurt anybody.
Or be hurt. They want to be able to sleep

Or be hurt. They want to be able to sleep well at night,
to swim in nice,

They want to be able to sleep well at night,
to swim in nice, clean pools, to win races.

Well at night, to swim in nice, clean pools,
to win races. Read interesting books.

Clean pools, to win races.
Read interesting books. Have a family.

Read interesting books.
Have a family. A father, mother.

Have a family. A father, mother.
I want to have experiences.

A father, mother. I want to have experiences.
Always be trying new things.

[Both sigh uncomfortably]

[both sigh uncomfortably]
>> That was new.

[Both sigh uncomfortably] >> That was new.
>> Yeah.

>> That was new.
>> Yeah. Are you mad?

>> Yeah.
Are you mad? >> No.

Are you mad? >> No.
I'm flattered, but you should

>> No. I'm flattered,
but you should probably go.

I'm flattered, but you should probably go.
>> Yeah, no, I--

probably go. >> Yeah, no,
I-- I just got to get my clothes.

>> Wow.

>> Wow.
>> David!

>> Wow. >> David!
>> No, no, no...

>> David! >> No, no,
no... >> I won't, I won't.

>> No, no, no... >> I won't,
I won't. David!

>> I won't, I won't.
David! >> Don't.

David! >> Don't.
>> David!

>> Don't.
>> David! David!

>> David!
David! Oh, God.

David! Oh, God.
Nothing wakes him when he's been

Oh, God.
Nothing wakes him when he's been drinking.

Nothing wakes him when he's been drinking.
Not a telephone--

drinking.
Not a telephone-- Car alarms, earthquakes,

Not a telephone-- Car alarms, earthquakes, thunder.

Car alarms, earthquakes, thunder.
Car engines at 3:00 in the

thunder.
Car engines at 3:00 in the morning.

Car engines at 3:00 in the morning.
Shit.

Morning. Shit.
>> When I was a little boy, I

Shit. >> When I was a little boy,
I could not fall asleep unless my

>> When I was a little boy,
I could not fall asleep unless my mom said good night to me an

could not fall asleep unless my mom said
good night to me an even number of times.

Mom said good night to me an even number of times.
Yeah, like, twice.

Even number of times. Yeah, like, twice.
"Good night, good night."

Yeah, like, twice. "Good night,
good night." Or four times.

"Good night, good night." Or four times.
"Good night, good night, good

Or four times. "Good night,
good night, good night, good night"

"Good night, good night, good night,
good night" Sometimes as a joke, my dad, he

night, good night" Sometimes as a joke,
my dad, he would throw in an extra one, and

Sometimes as a joke, my dad, he would throw in an extra one,
and then my mom would have to say

would throw in an extra one,
and then my mom would have to say good night to me again to even

then my mom would have to say good night to me again to even it out.

>> The, uh...

>> The, uh...
The ice cream...

>> The, uh... The ice cream...
>> What?

The ice cream... >> What?
>> When you recited the flavors.

>> What? >> When you recited the flavors.
Do you think that you could, um,

>> When you recited the flavors.
Do you think that you could, um, recite them again for me?

Do you think that you could, um,
recite them again for me? >> Now?

French vanilla, chocolate,

French vanilla, chocolate,
chocolate swirl...

French vanilla, chocolate,
chocolate swirl... Peanut butter dream.

Chocolate swirl...
Peanut butter dream. Coconut cream.

Peanut butter dream.
Coconut cream. Mint chip.

Coconut cream.
Mint chip. Caramel chunk.

Mint chip. Caramel chunk.
Coffee fudge.

Caramel chunk.
Coffee fudge. Coffee fudge.

Coffee fudge.
Coffee fudge. Pineapple.

Coffee fudge.
Pineapple. Mango.

Pineapple.
Mango. Mango.

Mango.
Mango. Vanilla.

Mango. Vanilla.
French vanilla.

Vanilla. French vanilla.
French vanilla.

French vanilla. French vanilla.
[Chimes ringing softly]

[thunder crashes rain falls]

[thunder crashes rain falls]
>> David--

[thunder crashes rain falls] >> David-- [gasps]

>> David-- [gasps] David.

David!

[Screams playfully]

[girls chatting outside]

[girls chatting outside]
>> Maybe he'll divorce his wife

[girls chatting outside] >> Maybe he'll divorce his wife for you.

>> Maybe he'll divorce his wife for you.
>> You know, he's, um, old

for you. >> You know, he's, um,
old enough to be your father.

>> You know, he's, um,
old enough to be your father. >> He is not.

Enough to be your father. >> He is not.
And besides, I don't love him.

>> He is not. And besides,
I don't love him. I just like him.

And besides, I don't love him.
I just like him. He's an inspiration.

I just like him. He's an inspiration.
>> Do you ever notice that lump

He's an inspiration.
>> Do you ever notice that lump in his pants when he wears his

>> Do you ever notice that lump in his pants when he wears his chinos?

In his pants when he wears his chinos?
I bet you he has such a big--

chinos?
I bet you he has such a big-- >> Hi, girls.

I bet you he has such a big-- >> Hi, girls.
>> [Together]

>> Hi, girls.
>> [Together] Good morning, Mr. Walker.

>> [Together] Good morning,
Mr. Walker. >> Thank you.

Good morning, Mr. Walker.
>> Thank you. >> Go ahead, ask him.

>> Thank you. >> Go ahead,
ask him. >> Ask me what?

>> Go ahead, ask him. >> Ask me what?
>> Heather wants to ask you if

>> Ask me what?
>> Heather wants to ask you if she can take your picture.

>> Heather wants to ask you if she can take your picture.
>> Uh, it's for the school

she can take your picture. >> Uh,
it's for the school newspaper, Mr. Walker.

>> Uh, it's for the school newspaper,
Mr. Walker. >> Sure, sure.

Newspaper, Mr. Walker.
>> Sure, sure. It'd be an honor.

>> Sure, sure. It'd be an honor.
Where do you want me?

It'd be an honor.
Where do you want me? >> Um, just--

Where do you want me?
>> Um, just-- >> Here?

>> Um,
just-- >> Here? Yeah.

>> Here? Yeah.
>> Can I ask you a question,

Yeah. >> Can I ask you a question,
Mr. Walker?

>> Can I ask you a question,
Mr. Walker? >> You just did.

Mr. Walker?
>> You just did. >> What?

>> You just did.
>> What? Oh, okay.

>> What? Oh, okay.
Um, it's a personal one.

Oh, okay. Um, it's a personal one.
>> Shoot.

Um, it's a personal one. >> Shoot.
>> Do you think Heather's cute?

>> Shoot.
>> Do you think Heather's cute? Flash!

>> Oh, shit.

[Phone rings]

[phone rings]
Um...

[phone continues ringing]

>> The Book of Love

>> The Book of Love
is long and boring.

>> The Book of Love is long and boring.
No one can lift

is long and boring.
No one can lift the damn thing.

No one can lift the damn thing.
It's full of charts

the damn thing.
It's full of charts and facts and figures

It's full of charts and facts and figures and instructions

and facts and figures and instructions for dancing.

And instructions for dancing.
But I...

for dancing.
But I... I love it

But I...
I love it when you read to me,

I love it when you read to me,
and you...

when you read to me, and you...
You can read me anything.

And you...
You can read me anything.

You can read me anything.
The Book of Love

The Book of Love
has music in it.

The Book of Love has music in it.
In fact, that's where

has music in it. In fact,
that's where music comes from.

In fact, that's where music comes from.
Some of it

music comes from.
Some of it is just transcendental.

Some of it is just transcendental.
Some of it

is just transcendental.
Some of it is just really dumb.

Some of it is just really dumb.
But I...

is just really dumb.
But I... I love it

But I...
I love it when you sing to me.

I love it when you sing to me.
And you...

when you sing to me. And you...
You can sing me anything.

And you... You can sing me anything.
The Book of Love

You can sing me anything.
The Book of Love is long and boring

The Book of Love is long and boring and written very long ago.

Is long and boring and written very long ago.
It's full of flowers

and written very long ago.
It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes

It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes and things we're all

and heart-shaped boxes and things we're all too young to know.

And things we're all too young to know.
But I...

too young to know.
But I... I love it

But I...
I love it when you give me things.

I love it when you give me things.
And you...

when you give me things.
And you... You are to give me

And you...
You are to give me wedding rings.

You are to give me wedding rings.
I...

wedding rings.
I... I love it

I... I love it when you give me things.

I love it when you give me things.
And you...

when you give me things.
And you... You are to give me

And you...
You are to give me wedding rings.

You are to give me wedding rings.
Splash!

Wedding rings.
Splash! [Raining]

beep!

[Breathing heavily]

[chimes tinkling]

>> [sighs]

>> Please tell me that you still

>> Please tell me that you still
love me, that you trust me, that

>> Please tell me that you still love me,
that you trust me, that I'm a good person.

[Both sigh and moan]

[girls whispering]

>> [together]

>> [together]
Good morning, Mr. Walker.

>> [Together] Good morning, Mr.
Walker. >> Good morning, girls.

Good morning, Mr. Walker. >> Good morning, girls.
>> You're late, Mr. Walker.

>> Good morning, girls. >> You're late,
Mr. Walker. >> Uh, yes, I know.

>> You're late, Mr. Walker.
>> Uh, yes, I know. I apologize.

>> Uh, yes, I know. I apologize.
>> Mr, Walker, you're never

I apologize. >> Mr, Walker,
you're never late.

>> Mr, Walker,
you're never late. >> Naomi.

Late. >> Naomi.
>> I was worried.

>> Naomi. >> I was worried.
>> I'm fine.

>> I was worried. >> I'm fine.
Thank you for your concern.

>> I'm fine. Thank you for your concern.
Now can we get started, please?

Thank you for your concern.
Now can we get started, please? I hope you've all completed

Now can we get started, please?
I hope you've all completed your, uh--

I hope you've all completed your,
uh-- Let's see...

your, uh-- Let's see... Shit.

Let's see... Shit. Oh.

[Sobbing]

[door opens]

[door opens]
[footsteps]

[door opens] [footsteps] [stall door closes]

[footsteps] [stall door closes] [urinating]

[toilet flushes]

[toilet flushes]
[footsteps]

[door closes]

[door closes]
[girls chatting]

[knocking]

>> Mr. Walker?

>> [Sniffling]

>> Here we go.

>> Here we go.
>> Thanks.

>> Here we go. >> Thanks.
>> Chet, um, just--

>> Thanks. >> Chet, um,
just-- >> What?

>> Chet, um, just-- >> What?
>> Wait a minute.

>> What?
>> Wait a minute. >> What?

>> Wait a minute. >> What?
You don't like that?

>> What?
You don't like that? Huh?

You don't like that? Huh?
You don't like having sex

Huh?
You don't like having sex with me?

You don't like having sex with me?
>> Chet, stop.

With me?
>> Chet, stop. [Laughs]

>> Chet, stop.
[Laughs] Stop it.

[Laughs] Stop it.
Stop it!

Stop it.
Stop it! [Sighs]

Stop it!
[Sighs] I'm an adult.

[Sighs] I'm an adult.
And I'm married.

I'm an adult. And I'm married.
See, Chet, life's really

And I'm married. See, Chet,
life's really complicated, and--

See, Chet, life's really complicated,
and-- >> Elaine, Elaine--

complicated, and-- >> Elaine,
Elaine-- >> I told Dave.

>> Elaine, Elaine-- >> I told Dave.
>> No, no.

>> I told Dave.
>> No, no. >> Wait--

>> No, no.
>> Wait-- >> No, no...

Does he hate me?

Does he hate me?
>> No, he doesn't hate you.

Does he hate me? >> No,
he doesn't hate you. >> I'm a bad person.

>> No, he doesn't hate you.
>> I'm a bad person. >> No, no, you're a really

>> I'm a bad person.
>> No, no, you're a really good--

>> No, no, you're a really good-- >> No,
I'm a bad person.

Good-- >> No, I'm a bad person.
I did something.

>> No, I'm a bad person.
I did something. >> You're good--

I did something. >> You're good-- >> No,
I did something bad.

>> You're good-- >> No,
I did something bad. >> I did too.

>> No, I did something bad.
>> I did too. >> Why?

>> I did too.
>> Why? >> What?

>> Why?
>> What? >> Why?

>> What?
>> Why? >> I--

>> Why?
>> I-- I don't know why.

>> I-- I don't know why.
I have to go.

I don't know why.
I have to go. Where's my bag?

I have to go. Where's my bag?
>> I got these.

Where's my bag? >> I got these.
I got these from the library.

>> I got these. I got these from the library.
We can go together.

I got these from the library.
We can go together. You, Dave, me.

We can go together. You, Dave,
me. When I graduate.

You, Dave, me. When I graduate.
I've been saving my money.

When I graduate. I've been saving my money.
You wouldn't even have to pay

I've been saving my money.
You wouldn't even have to pay for me.

You wouldn't even have to pay for me.
Okay, I love you.

For me. Okay, I love you.
I love you.

Okay, I love you.
I love you. I love you.

I love you. I love you.
I love Dave.

I love you. I love Dave.
Both of you.

I love Dave. Both of you.
I just want--

Both of you.
I just want-- >> I know you do.

I just want-- >> I know you do.
I know you do.

[Turns on television]

[turns on television]
>> 3-42 with 92 RBIs.

[Turns on television] >> 3-42 with 92 RBIs.
[Hard rock music]

>> 3-42 with 92 RBIs.
[Hard rock music] >> Come on, get up!

[Hard rock music]
>> Come on, get up!

>> Come on,
get up! Hey, hey!

Hey, hey!
Come on, get up!

>> A baby.

>> A baby.
>> Yeah.

>> A baby.
>> Yeah. >> Wow.

>> Yeah. >> Wow.
That's, um, that's--

>> Wow. That's, um,
that's-- >> I know.

That's, um,
that's-- >> I know. I know.

>> I know. I know.
I was dying to call you and tell

I know.
I was dying to call you and tell you as soon as we decided for

I was dying to call you and tell you as soon as we decided for sure,
but Melly wouldn't let me.

You as soon as we decided for sure,
but Melly wouldn't let me. >> Well, I just thought that we

sure, but Melly wouldn't let me. >> Well,
I just thought that we should tell you in person.

>> Well, I just thought that we should tell you in person.
Here, let me--

should tell you in person.
Here, let me-- >> No, no, let me take care

Here, let me-- >> No, no,
let me take care of it.

>> No, no,
let me take care of it. >> Yeah.

Of it. >> Yeah.
So, um--

>> Yeah.
So, um-- How?

So, um-- How?
>> Artificial insemination.

How? >> Artificial insemination.
>> And which one of you?

>> Artificial insemination.
>> And which one of you? >> I will.

>> And which one of you? >> I will.
>> It's just so hard for me to

>> I will.
>> It's just so hard for me to take that much time off from

>> It's just so hard for me to take that much time off from work, and--

take that much time off from work,
and-- >> And I'm younger.

Work, and-- >> And I'm younger.
>> Sure.

>> And I'm younger. >> Sure.
Well, uh, here's to babies.

>> Sure. Well, uh,
here's to babies. Congratulations.

Well, uh, here's to babies.
Congratulations. >> Congratulations.

Congratulations. >> Congratulations.
>> We've, um, actually been

>> Congratulations. >> We've, um,
actually been discussing it for quite some

>> We've, um,
actually been discussing it for quite some time, but Lilian--

discussing it for quite some time,
but Lilian-- >> But Lilian was too immature

time, but Lilian-- >> But Lilian was too immature for parenthood and,
at someone's

>> But Lilian was too immature for parenthood and,
at someone's insistence, had to endure six

for parenthood and, at someone's insistence,
had to endure six boring months of therapy first.

Insistence, had to endure six boring months of therapy first.
>> The best I could do.

Boring months of therapy first. >> The best I could do.
>> We want Dave to be the sperm

>> The best I could do.
>> We want Dave to be the sperm donor.

>> We want Dave to be the sperm donor.
>> Okay, do you have to blurt

donor. >> Okay,
do you have to blurt out everything before I'm ready?

>> Okay, do you have to blurt out everything before I'm ready?
>> Yeah, I do.

Out everything before I'm ready?
>> Yeah, I do. So, what do you think?

>> Yeah, I do. So, what do you think?
>> We love you both so much, and

So, what do you think? >> We love you both so much,
and there'd be no obligation, legal

>> We love you both so much, and there'd be no obligation,
legal or otherwise, on your part.

There'd be no obligation, legal or otherwise,
on your part. >> Although we want you both to

or otherwise, on your part.
>> Although we want you both to be present in our child's life.

>> Although we want you both to be present in our child's life.
>> No matter what you decide.

Be present in our child's life. >> No matter what you decide.
>> But it's not a requirement.

>> No matter what you decide.
>> But it's not a requirement. >> You don't have to make a

>> But it's not a requirement.
>> You don't have to make a decision right away.

>> You don't have to make a decision right away.
>> Well?

Decision right away.
>> Well? >> [Clears throat]

>> Well?
>> [Clears throat] >> Dave?

>> [Clears throat] >> Dave?
>> Uh...

>> Dave? >> Uh...
>> Elaine?

>> Uh... >> Elaine?
>> Dave?

[Girls laughing]

[girls laughing]
>> Duck...

[girls laughing] >> Duck... Duck...

>> Duck... Duck... Duck...

Duck... Duck... Duck...

Duck... Duck... Duck...

Duck... Duck... Duck...

[knocking]

[knocking]
>> Come in.

>> Am I disturbing you?

>> Am I disturbing you?
>> I'm correcting papers.

>> Am I disturbing you?
>> I'm correcting papers. >> About what?

>> I'm correcting papers.
>> About what? >> Khmer Rouge.

>> About what?
>> Khmer Rouge. >> Pol Pot?

>> Khmer Rouge.
>> Pol Pot? Quite a guy.

>> Pol Pot? Quite a guy.
>> Yeah, you could say that.

Quite a guy. >> Yeah, you could say that.
>> You know, he's still out

>> Yeah, you could say that. >> You know,
he's still out there in the jungles somewhere.

>> You know,
he's still out there in the jungles somewhere. >> Yeah.

There in the jungles somewhere.
>> Yeah. >> They should find him and

>> Yeah.
>> They should find him and arrest him.

>> They should find him and arrest him.
>> They will.

Arrest him. >> They will.
>> How do you grade?

>> They will. >> How do you grade?
>> Excuse me?

>> How do you grade? >> Excuse me?
>> Your students' papers.

>> Excuse me? >> Your students' papers.
>> What about them?

>> Your students' papers. >> What about them?
>> Well, do you grade them on

>> What about them? >> Well,
do you grade them on their spelling and on their

>> Well, do you grade them on their spelling
and on their grammar or on their ideas?

Their spelling and on their grammar or on their ideas?
>> I grade them on everything,

grammar or on their ideas?
>> I grade them on everything, of course.

>> I grade them on everything,
of course. >> But if somebody's got a

of course.
>> But if somebody's got a really good idea, they just

>> But if somebody's got a really good idea,
they just don't get it down in the

really good idea,
they just don't get it down in the regular, required way--

don't get it down in the regular,
required way-- If they mess up the rules a

regular, required way-- If they mess up the rules a little bit,
then what do you do?

If they mess up the rules a little bit,
then what do you do? >> What is your point, Chet?

Little bit, then what do you do?
>> What is your point, Chet? >> What's the most important

>> What is your point, Chet?
>> What's the most important part?

>> What's the most important part?
>> I've got a lot of work to do,

part?
>> I've got a lot of work to do, okay?

>> I've got a lot of work to do, okay?
>> Does the grammar really

okay?
>> Does the grammar really matter as long as you get the

>> Does the grammar really matter as long as you get the idea right?

Matter as long as you get the idea right?
>> You fucked my wife.

>> Please.

>> Please.
Dave, I'm sorry.

>> Please. Dave, I'm sorry.
>> Mr. Walker?

Dave, I'm sorry. >> Mr.
Walker? I'm sorry.

>> Mr. Walker? I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to--

I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to-- >> What is it?

I didn't mean to-- >> What is it?
>> Um, I didn't hand in my

>> What is it? >> Um,
I didn't hand in my paper yet.

>> Um, I didn't hand in my paper yet.
>> The deadline was this

paper yet.
>> The deadline was this morning.

>> The deadline was this morning.
>> If I hand it in tomorrow?

Morning. >> If I hand it in tomorrow?
>> Piercings are against school

>> If I hand it in tomorrow?
>> Piercings are against school rules, Naomi.

>> Piercings are against school rules, Naomi.
You know that.

Rules, Naomi.
You know that. >> Oh, this.

You know that.
>> Oh, this. No, it's fake.

>> Oh, this. No, it's fake.
>> Take it out.

No, it's fake. >> Take it out.
The end of the school day

>> Take it out.
The end of the school day tomorrow or no credit.

The end of the school day tomorrow or no credit.
>> Thank you, Mr. Walker.

Tomorrow or no credit. >> Thank you,
Mr. Walker. >> It's the last time.

>> Thank you, Mr. Walker.
>> It's the last time. >> You're the greatest.

>> [Sighs]

>> [sighs]
You know, I really do have a lot

>> [sighs] You know,
I really do have a lot of work to do.

You know, I really do have a lot of work to do.
>> I just wanted--

of work to do.
>> I just wanted-- Sorry.

>> I just wanted-- Sorry.
I'm sorry.

Sorry. I'm sorry.
>> Hey, hey, hey...

I'm sorry.
>> Hey, hey, hey... Um--

Disney World.

Disney World.
>> What?

>> Weekend after next.

>> Weekend after next.
Uh, I could take the Friday off,

>> Weekend after next. Uh, I could take the Friday off,
make it a long weekend, and we

Uh, I could take the Friday off, make it a long weekend,
and we could pack everything in.

Make it a long weekend,
and we could pack everything in. I could call and make

could pack everything in.
I could call and make reservations tonight.

I could call and make reservations tonight.
>> Uh, I don't think it's--

reservations tonight. >> Uh,
I don't think it's-- >> Oh, come on, you can take one

>> Uh, I don't think it's-- >> Oh, come on,
you can take one day off school to go to

>> Oh, come on,
you can take one day off school to go to Disney World, Chet.

Day off school to go to Disney World, Chet.
>> Yeah, but I don't know--

Disney World, Chet. >> Yeah,
but I don't know-- >> Frontierland?

>> Yeah, but I don't know-- >> Frontierland?
Tomorrowland?

>> Frontierland?
Tomorrowland? Yesterdayland?

Tomorrowland? Yesterdayland?
>> I don't think there's a

Yesterdayland?
>> I don't think there's a Yesterdayland.

>> I don't think there's a Yesterdayland.
>> Yeah, whatever.

I promised you.

I promised you.
Didn't I?

I promised you.
Didn't I? >> Yeah.

Didn't I? >> Yeah.
>> I just--

>> Yeah.
>> I just-- I don't like to break promises

>> I just-- I don't like to break promises to my friends, Chet.

>> Thank you, Dave.

>> Thank you, Dave.
>> All right.

>> Thank you, Dave.
>> All right. >> Thank you.

>> [Sighs]

[hard rock music playing]

[hard rock music playing]
[grunting]

[hard rock music playing]
[grunting]

[grunting] >> Be my valentine.

>> Be my valentine.
>> David!

>> Be my valentine. >> David!
>> I'll be your valentine.

>> David! >> I'll be your valentine.
Only if a month.

>> I'll be your valentine.
Only if a month. >> [Grunts]

Only if a month.
>> [Grunts] >> Kiss him once.

>> [Grunts] >> Kiss him once.
Kiss him twice.

>> Kiss him once.
Kiss him twice. >> David!

Kiss him twice.
>> David! [Music stops]

Enough for tonight.

Enough for tonight.
Your face is all red.

Enough for tonight.
Your face is all red. Come sit.

Your face is all red.
Come sit. I was thinking--

Come sit.
I was thinking-- Do you think we should buy

I was thinking-- Do you think we should buy bikes?

Do you think we should buy bikes?
We could both get bikes.

Bikes? We could both get bikes.
Because don't Lilian and Melissa

We could both get bikes.
Because don't Lilian and Melissa have bikes?

Because don't Lilian and Melissa have bikes?
>> I don't know.

Have bikes? >> I don't know.
>> We could bike with them.

>> I don't know. >> We could bike with them.
In the city, in the park.

>> We could bike with them.
In the city, in the park. David?

Have you spoken with them?

Have you spoken with them?
>> No.

Have you spoken with them?
>> No. >> Have you at least been

>> No.
>> Have you at least been thinking about it?

>> Have you at least been thinking about it?
Because I think that we owe it--

thinking about it?
Because I think that we owe it-- >> Yeah, I know.

Because I think that we owe it-- >> Yeah,
I know. [Sighs]

You know, Chet came to see me.

You know, Chet came to see me.
>> Chet?

You know, Chet came to see me.
>> Chet? >> Yeah.

>> Chet? >> Yeah.
>> When?

>> Yeah. >> When?
>> Last week.

>> When? >> Last week.
>> Where?

>> Last week.
>> Where? >> School.

>> Where? >> School.
Yeah, we, uh--

>> School. Yeah, we,
uh-- We talked.

Yeah, we, uh-- We talked.
>> About what?

>> About, uh--

>> About, uh--
Disney World.

>> About, uh-- Disney World.
>> Disney World.

Disney World. >> Disney World.
>> We're going.

>> Disney World. >> We're going.
>> Who is going?

>> We're going. >> Who is going?
>> You, me, Chet.

>> Who is going? >> You, me, Chet.
>> I don't think that is funny.

>> You, me, Chet. >> I don't think that is funny.
>> I've already booked the

>> I don't think that is funny.
>> I've already booked the tickets.

>> I've already booked the tickets.
They're nonrefundable.

Tickets. They're nonrefundable.
I found a hotel I thought you

They're nonrefundable.
I found a hotel I thought you might like.

I found a hotel I thought you might like.
It has two swimming pools, three

might like. It has two swimming pools,
three restaurants, each with a

It has two swimming pools, three restaurants,
each with a Caribbean flair, and it's just

restaurants, each with a Caribbean flair,
and it's just steps from the Epcot Center, and

Caribbean flair, and it's just steps from the Epcot Center,
and I got us three full Fantasy

steps from the Epcot Center,
and I got us three full Fantasy passes, good for all theme parks

I got us three full Fantasy passes,
good for all theme parks from the moment you check in

passes, good for all theme parks from the moment
you check in until the moment you check out.

From the moment you check in until the moment you check out.
And there's a spa facility with

until the moment you check out.
And there's a spa facility with all the latest treatments.

And there's a spa facility with all the latest treatments.
They even have couples massage.

All the latest treatments.
They even have couples massage. [Sighs]

They even have couples massage.
[Sighs] I just didn't want to

[sighs] I just didn't want to disappoint him.

I just didn't want to disappoint him.
Feel this.

Disappoint him.
Feel this. Here.

Feel this.
Here. Huh?

Here. Huh?
Like a rock, huh?

Huh?
Like a rock, huh? Shower.

[Shower running]

[shower running]
>> [sighs]

[shower running] >> [sighs] >> [whistling]

[Caribbean-style music playing]

[Caribbean-style music playing]

>> Oh, my God!

>> Oh, my God!
[Giggles]

Oh, my God, he's fine.

Oh, my God, he's fine.
>> I should go.

Oh, my God, he's fine. >> I should go.
>> I don't know why you need a

>> I should go.
>> I don't know why you need a facial.

>> I don't know why you need a facial.
I mean, you're already

facial. I mean,
you're already beautiful.

I mean, you're already beautiful.
Don't take too long.

Beautiful. Don't take too long.
We got a full day planned.

Don't take too long. We got a full day planned.
What's on the schedule today,

We got a full day planned.
What's on the schedule today, Chet?

What's on the schedule today, Chet?
>> Uh, Jungle Boat Trip.

Chet? >> Uh, Jungle Boat Trip.
After that, Thunder Mountain.

>> Uh, Jungle Boat Trip. After that,
Thunder Mountain. >> All right, that's if the

After that, Thunder Mountain. >> All right,
that's if the lines are not too long.

>> All right, that's if the lines are not too long.
>> Hey, come here.

Lines are not too long.
>> Hey, come here. Love you.

>> Hey, come here.
Love you. >> Don't.

Love you. >> Don't.
Your ears are getting burned.

>> Don't. Your ears are getting burned.
You should put some sunblock on.

Your ears are getting burned.
You should put some sunblock on. >> Elaine.

You should put some sunblock on.
>> Elaine. You're having a good time,

>> Elaine.
You're having a good time, right?

You're having a good time, right?
I don't bite.

Here you go.

Here you go.
>> Yeah, I should probably get

Here you go. >> Yeah,
I should probably get back to my room and get changed.

>> Yeah, I should probably get back to my room and get changed.
It's getting kind of cold.

Back to my room and get changed.
It's getting kind of cold. >> Oh, no, stay.

It's getting kind of cold.
>> Oh, no, stay. I'll turn the air off.

>> Oh, no, stay. I'll turn the air off.
Hey, here you go.

I'll turn the air off.
Hey, here you go. >> Thanks.

Hey, here you go.
>> Thanks. Hey, Dave.

>> Thanks. Hey, Dave.
>> Is Elaine okay?

Hey, Dave. >> Is Elaine okay?
>> Yeah, she's fine, Chet.

>> Is Elaine okay? >> Yeah,
she's fine, Chet. So, uh, tomorrow we go to

>> Yeah, she's fine, Chet. So, uh,
tomorrow we go to Blizzard Beach, right?

So, uh, tomorrow we go to Blizzard Beach, right?
And I was thinking maybe tonight

Blizzard Beach, right?
And I was thinking maybe tonight before dinner, you can take me

And I was thinking maybe tonight before dinner,
you can take me back down to the pool and show

before dinner, you can take me back down to the
pool and show me one of those fancy dives of

back down to the pool and show me one of those fancy dives of yours.

Me one of those fancy dives of yours.
>> Yeah, sure.

Yours. >> Yeah, sure.
I mean, if you want to, I could

>> Yeah, sure. I mean,
if you want to, I could do that.

I mean, if you want to,
I could do that. >> Great.

Do that. >> Great.
Great dives.

>> Great. Great dives.
Here, why don't you show me one

Great dives.
Here, why don't you show me one right now?

Here, why don't you show me one right now?
>> Here?

Right now? >> Here?
>> Yeah, man, just here.

>> Here? >> Yeah, man,
just here. Show me.

>> Yeah, man, just here.
Show me. >> It's kind of weird.

Show me. >> It's kind of weird.
There's no water.

>> It's kind of weird. There's no water.
>> Yeah, why don't we just

There's no water. >> Yeah,
why don't we just pretend?

>> Yeah, why don't we just pretend?
Here we go.

Pretend?
Here we go. The pro.

Here we go. The pro.
>> The pro.

The pro. >> The pro.
>> You spring--

>> The pro.
>> You spring-- >> [laughs]

>> You spring-- >> [laughs] Huh?

>> [Laughs] Huh?
Bet the girls really go for

Huh?
Bet the girls really go for those dives, huh?

Bet the girls really go for those dives, huh?
Come on, Chet.

Those dives, huh? Come on, Chet.
Oh, you're quick, huh?

Come on, Chet. Oh, you're quick, huh?
>> You're hurting me.

Oh, you're quick, huh? >> You're hurting me.
>> You think that Dave can dive

>> You're hurting me.
>> You think that Dave can dive too, huh?

>> You think that Dave can dive too, huh?
You're so special, yeah?

Too, huh? You're so special, yeah?
You swim.

You're so special, yeah?
You swim. You dive.

You swim. You dive.
You fuck my wife.

You dive.
You fuck my wife. Huh?

You fuck my wife.
Huh? >> Stop it.

Huh? >> Stop it.
Stop it, all right?

>> Stop it. Stop it,
all right? You're hurting me!

Stop it, all right?
You're hurting me! Stop--

You're hurting me!
Stop-- >> Oh, boy.

Stop-- >> Oh, boy. Ohhhh-oh.

>> Oh, boy.
Ohhhh-oh. >> David?

Ohhhh-oh.
>> David? >> Elaine.

>> David? >> Elaine.
>> I didn't mean it.

>> Elaine. >> I didn't mean it.
>> Oh, my God.

>> I didn't mean it. >> Oh,
my God. >> No, no, no, no.

>> Oh, my God.
>> No, no, no, no. No, it's--

>> No, no, no, no.
No, it's-- >> I guess I should pick on

No, it's-- >> I guess I should pick on someone my own size, huh?

>> I guess I should pick on someone my own size, huh?
>> Don't.

Someone my own size, huh?
>> Don't. >> It's all his fault.

>> Don't.
>> It's all his fault. Tell him.

>> It's all his fault.
Tell him. Tell her.

Tell him.
Tell her. Tell her.

Tell her.
Tell her. Tell her.

Tell her. Tell her.
>> Stay away from me.

Tell her.
>> Stay away from me. Stay--

>> Stay away from me.
Stay-- >> No, both of you--

Stay-- >> No,
both of you-- >> She doesn't want you, okay?

>> No, both of you-- >> She doesn't want you, okay?
[Caribbean music playing]

>> She doesn't want you, okay?
[Caribbean music playing]

[music stops]

[music stops]
>> [gasping]

>> Fuck off.

>> Fuck off.
Fuck off.

>> I'm fine.

[Cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]
>> Next up, division one

[cheers and applause] >> Next up,
division one 50-meter freestyle.

>> Next up, division one 50-meter freestyle.
Swimmers, take your marks.

50-meter freestyle.
Swimmers, take your marks. [Applause]

Get set.

Get set.
[Whistle blows]

>> [sobbing]

[women chanting]

[acoustic guitar music]

[acoustic guitar music]

>> May the sun

>> May the sun
always shine on you,

>> May the sun always shine on you,
and each day

always shine on you,
and each day feel so bright and new.

And each day feel so bright and new.
And may God

feel so bright and new.
And may God hold you in the palm

And may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Hold you in the palm
of His hand.

Of His hand.
May the moon

May the moon
always light your way,

May the moon always light your way,
and love

always light your way,
and love be forever here to stay.

And love be forever here to stay.
And may God

be forever here to stay.
And may God hold you in the palm

And may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Hold you in the palm of His hand.
And may God

of His hand.
And may God hold you in the palm

And may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Hold you in the palm of His hand.
And if the world

of His hand.
And if the world should turn its back to you,

And if the world should turn its back to you,
and it seems,

should turn its back to you,
and it seems, it seems

and it seems,
it seems there's nothing left to do,

it seems there's nothing left to do,
then may God

there's nothing left to do,
then may God hold you in the palm

then may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Hold you in the palm of His hand.
Then may God

of His hand.
Then may God hold you in the palm

Then may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Hold you in the palm
of His hand.

[Insects buzzing]

[insects buzzing]
[exotic flute music]

[insects buzzing]
[exotic flute music]

>> Thank you.

>> Thank you.
>> [Speaking native language]

>> [mouthing words silently]

>> [mouthing words silently]
>> I really should stay and help

>> [mouthing words silently] >> I really should stay and help clean up.

>> I really should stay and help clean up.
>> Oh, no, no, go.

Clean up. >> Oh, no, no, go.
We're gonna throw everything

>> Oh, no, no, go.
We're gonna throw everything into the dishwasher.

We're gonna throw everything into the dishwasher.
>> "We" being me.

Into the dishwasher.
>> "We" being me. Dip me.

>> "We" being me.
Dip me. >> Oh.

Dip me. >> Oh.
>> Okay.

>> Oh. >> Okay.
You two been practicing?

>> Okay. You two been practicing?
>> Oh, I hope you know how much

You two been practicing? >> Oh,
I hope you know how much we appreciate this.

>> Oh, I hope you know how much we appreciate this.
>> As do I.

We appreciate this. >> As do I.
>> And how much Esther and Lucas

>> As do I.
>> And how much Esther and Lucas love having their father around

>> And how much Esther and Lucas love
having their father around all the time.

Love having their father around all the time.
>> Okay.

All the time. >> Okay.
>> But Melly thinks you should

>> Okay.
>> But Melly thinks you should go back to teaching.

>> But Melly thinks you should go back to teaching.
>> Lilly?

Go back to teaching.
>> Lilly? Okay, so I do.

>> Lilly? Okay, so I do.
But mostly, I think you should

Okay, so I do. But mostly,
I think you should do whatever makes you happy.

But mostly,
I think you should do whatever makes you happy. [Sighs]

do whatever makes you happy.
[Sighs] >> Well, this makes me happy.

[Sighs] >> Well,
this makes me happy. For now.

>> Well, this makes me happy.
For now. Good night.

For now. Good night.
See you tomorrow.

[Whistling]

>> Lift up your arms.

>> Lift up your arms.
Now lift and expand your heart.

A beautiful

A beautiful
Hackensack night.

A beautiful Hackensack night.
Two teenagers kiss

Hackensack night.
Two teenagers kiss and hold--

Satellite swimming above

Satellite swimming above
is sending a message

Satellite swimming above is sending a message of love.

Is sending a message of love.
>> No one's more happy

of love.
>> No one's more happy than you.

>> No one's more happy than you.
Even the sky's feeling blue.

Than you. Even the sky's feeling blue.
And you don't believe,

Even the sky's feeling blue.
And you don't believe, but it's true.

And you don't believe,
but it's true. No one's more happy

but it's true.
No one's more happy than you.

No one's more happy than you.
>> An astronaut.

Than you. >> An astronaut.
Also a doctor.

>> An astronaut.
Also a doctor. >> Also?

Also a doctor. >> Also?
>> Also a architect, chef, web

>> Also? >> Also a architect, chef,
web designer, naturalist, biologist,

>> Also a architect, chef,
web designer, naturalist, biologist, oceanographer, Arctic explorer,

designer, naturalist, biologist, oceanographer,
Arctic explorer, environmental lawyer--

oceanographer, Arctic explorer,
environmental lawyer-- Oh, and President of the United

environmental lawyer-- Oh, and President of the United States.

Oh, and President of the United States.
[Both chuckle]

States. [Both chuckle] Yeah,
there are a lot of

[both chuckle] Yeah,
there are a lot of things I wanted to be when I

Yeah, there are a lot of things I wanted to be when I grew up.

Things I wanted to be when I grew up.
>> You still could be.

Grew up. >> You still could be.
20's still young.

>> You still could be.
20's still young. >> Yeah.

20's still young. >> Yeah.
You see that old man?

>> Yeah.
You see that old man? >> Yeah.

You see that old man? >> Yeah.
>> He used to be Khmer Rouge.

>> Yeah. >> He used to be Khmer Rouge.
>> How do you know?

>> He used to be Khmer Rouge.
>> How do you know? >> Everybody knows.

>> How do you know? >> Everybody knows.
>> Why don't they turn him in to

>> Everybody knows.
>> Why don't they turn him in to the police or something?

>> Why don't they turn him in to the police or something?
>> Well, because some of the

the police or something? >> Well,
because some of the police used to be Khmer Rouge

>> Well,
because some of the police used to be Khmer Rouge too.

Police used to be Khmer Rouge too.
>> A lot of people were.

Too. >> A lot of people were.
But that was a long time ago.

>> A lot of people were. But that was a long time ago.
Besides, he's a cool old guy.

But that was a long time ago.
Besides, he's a cool old guy. I like him.

Besides, he's a cool old guy.
I like him. Yeah, Heather.

I like him. Yeah, Heather.
It's a pretty name.

Yeah, Heather.
It's a pretty name. Boom!

It's a pretty name. Boom!
>> No one's more happy

boom!
>> No one's more happy than you.

>> No one's more happy than you.
No one's more happy

than you.
No one's more happy than you.

No one's more happy than you.
The Stop N Shop is open

than you.
The Stop N Shop is open all night

The Stop N Shop is open all night with a mothering

all night with a mothering fluorescent light.

With a mothering fluorescent light.
Milk carton pictures

fluorescent light.
Milk carton pictures a dove

Milk carton pictures a dove as the intercom crackles

a dove as the intercom crackles with love.

As the intercom crackles with love.
No one's more happy

with love.
No one's more happy than you.

No one's more happy than you.
The foot's

than you.
The foot's on the other shoe.

The foot's on the other shoe.
And nobody knows what to do.

Captioning by CaptionMax

No one's more happy

No one's more happy
than you.

No one's more happy than you.
No one's more happy

than you.
No one's more happy than you.

No one's more happy than you.
No one.

Than you.
No one.

No one.
[Exotic flute music]

[exotic flute music]

[saxophone music]

[saxophone music]