Bloody Nose, Empty Pockets (2020) - full transcript

Doors are open, you know the
deal.

Come on, I'll get you a little
pick-me-up.

This isn't good.

Well, this is.

Best part of waking up, bourbon
in your cup.

- There you go, brother.
- Thank you.

Get any sleep last night?

Tomorrow, tomorrow...

tomorrow,

creeps in this petty pace

from day to day.



On this spot in 2016,
Michael slept it off.

Last day with him.

What's he gonna do, where is he
gonna go?

- I mean, come on. -That's
actually a very good question.

I can't imagine that dude
functioning without this place,
but...

guess he'll have to figure it
out.

All right.

- I'm sorry.
- Aw.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Come here. I'm sorry.

- All right, buddy, no worries.
- Thank you.

Glad to see you among the living
again.

You look much better.

You feeling any better?



Sure, let's say yes.

That's good. I didn't touch any
of your stuff.

I... I know, I didn't... I know.

All right, buddy.

- See you tomorrow.
- I probably...

That's a lot more sun than I
usually see.

- What's the... um...
- Sorry.

Fucking last day in paradise,
huh?

Honestly, what does this bar
make?

So you're going down... so you're
going down to $85 a day, who
cares?

- Stay open. -Probably gonna turn
into a CVS anyway.

All right, anyway.

I'm going to go get the
decorations.

All right, please do.

- Oh, lookie-lou.
- Good morning.

I can't believe John's here, I
can't believe it.

What are the odds? Oh, and he
has doughnuts!

Look at that! Ask and ye shall
receive!

- Forget the sandwich.
- Fuck the sandwich!

- Give me the fucking doughnuts!
- Good man.

John, just in the nick of time,
coming through with doughnuts.

Oh, God, this thing weighs about
40 pounds.

I really do have to go get
the decorations.

Try not to hurt yourself.

- How are you doing today, man?
- Good.

Can you put that somewhere?

Yeah, yeah, will do.

- Do I want to know what's in
there? -Nope.

You know what they say at the
airport?

If you see something say
something?

The whole, like, unmarked bag
situation?

See nothing, saw nothing.

For more on what's gonna
happen, we go to Yasmeen
Hassan.

Now we are just a few hours
away from Carnado.

If you're heading south on
the 15, and you need to
head off in that general
direction,

I would hop off at Lake
Mead and then take MLK over

and then that'll connect you
over to 95.

So, all of this starts at 10
p.m. tonight

and it's going to stay in
place until February.

You really hit the ground
running today, Michael.

I... I know we're making fun,
but...

- Aren't we always?
- I pride myself...

I pride myself on not having
become an alcoholic

until after I was already a
failure,

because alcoholic failures are
boring.

That's actually...

And I ruined my life sober,

and then I came to you.

We got you at the prime... we got
you at the prime of your life, man.

So you're saying the alcohol
didn't ruin your life.

Keith Richards looks at you and
wonders how you're still alive.

That was the sound of your point
being rejected by the judges.

- That is... -We're going to have
to go to the judges.

- Hello!
- Brothers!

You're just in time for the
not-party.

We're not having fun in
celebration of not closing.

Hey, I'm leaving, I'll catch you
all later.

Like, what else is new? Welcome
to the rant.

- Michael's just getting started.
- Oh my God.

All right, this is... this
is... this is...

I'm really almost done.

- You look good.
- Not yet, but I wish I was.

Success is not something
that you're responsible for.

You know, success will happen
or it won't happen,

largely due to forces
outside your control.

- Really?
- Largely, not exclusively.

There are people who can bull
their way through to success.

- But by and large...
- Hard work and all that.

By and large, it's a matter of
luck and timing and...

All right, thank you,
at least there's one point.

So all you can do,

all you can be responsible for,

is not becoming a joke

before you go.

And...

Oh, shit.

Jesus, Lowell. Fuck you, man.

Fucking asshole.

A new car!

Thank you so much.

Mark-Paul Gosselaar...

Y'all remember Wolfman?

Hell yeah.

- Oh my gosh.
- Oh, look, we got the...

Can I get... can I get some more
coffee, please?

- Michael.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're a man of small... little
words.

Well then string up some goddamn
tape, you got the party shit
right there.

Here, blow some of these up.

Ain't gonna happen. I got no
lungs.

Well, I don't scare easy, but
God dammit, that Carnado is
scaring the piss out of me.

- I don't mind...
- I heard that.

You know, I woke up this
morning, it was like, it's a
nice sunny day.

- It's on its way. -It's like
we're all fucked, man, you know?

And the world's largest gift
shop just got sold.

This place is fucking shutting
down.

Well, they saw Carnado coming.

That's it, yeah, yeah, that's
it. You got it.

The Bonanza Gift and Souvenir
Shops sold.

You know, I don't even care
about this town anymore.

- They're losing their character.
- I hear you, I hear you, dude.

-The world, it's... -Fucking
Celine Dion can have it, I'm
moving.

Stay right there.

Stay right there.

I'm gonna... I want to see if
they'll come here.

I know, I'm working on it.

I'm sorry.

Listen to this, Michael. Write it down in your
precious little notebook that I won't touch.

♪ You got to know when to hold
'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know just when to run ♪

- Or shut the fuck up.
- ♪ You never count your money

when you're sitting at the table
♪

♪ There'll be time enough for
counting ♪

♪ When the dealing's done ♪

Yeah, yeah!

- All right. -I did, I listened
to every bit of it.

Thank you, 20's, it's been a good
God knows how many fucking years.

But I'm out.

I'm gonna take this here guitar,

go out to Reno and make dozens
of dollars.

- Well, that certainly helps.
- Did you bring your cello?

No, you know I don't bring that
shit near you animals.

American Pie!

So, Marc, when you become rich
and famous, you gonna share?

- Huh?
- Yeah.

- You gonna share?
- Share what?

- When you become rich and
famous? -Your money.

- Yeah, I'll bring you guys a
couple bucks. -Hundredaire?

Don't forget, that's all I'm
saying.

You're the man, you're the man.

It's another word for a
crucifix or cross.

- Good.
- What the fuck is that?

like "Cactus Makes Perfect."

- Yes. -Three of a Kind
for $800.

You got me there.

- Oh! -...appear in this book
of the Old Testament.

- Daniel, right. -Three
of a Kind for $1000.

Are we the smartest people
alive?

The pop music needs to come back
on.

- ...who determined human
destiny. -He picked eight.

- The muses?
- The fates.

What are we watching this for,
to feel stupider?

I already had to deal with these
clowns.

Alex Trebek, you smug son of a
bitch.

Sherwin-Williams Fireweed is
close.

- Yes. -Native
Americans for $200.

The name of this tribe, the
USA's largest,

comes from a word meaning
"planted fields,"

since they were farmers.

U.S.'s largest tribe, the
Navajo.

I know you gotta shave
in the sink in the morning,

but make sure you rinse down the
hair.

- It's okay!
- No, I'm sorry, man.

That's all right, man,
you look good, you look good.

I finished my sandwich, I'm
saving a little bit for later
on.

Okay. Jeez, you guys are really
knocking these signs out the
park.

We're gonna have a lesson in
handwriting as soon as we're
done.

I never thought I'd say it, but
Lowell's got the best
handwriting so far.

You know what, I'm gonna tell
y'all a little joke.

Alright, tell me your joke.

- Ready for it.
- Okay.

I'm gonna tell you something.

You can root high and die a poor
pig.

And a heap see, but a few know
what's going on.

Now listen to what I said.

A heap of people see,

but a few know what's going on.

- A "frew"?
- We know what's going on.

- A fruit?
- The Carnado's...

I ain't said no fruit.

You... you act like you got
carbonation milk behind your
ears.

I said a few.

- A few. -Okay, okay, is this
like a riddle?

Uh, no.

F-E-W.

A few know what's going on.

-A few know what's going on. -So
could you say the whole thing
again?

A heap see but a few
know... what's going on.

A heap of people see but a few
people know what's going on.

A heap of people see, but a few
know what's going on.

-That's sage wisdom. -Yeah, say
it inside out, then it will be
like Yoda.

- Right, you have to reverse
everything. -Yes.

I can say it backwards.

Everybody sees but...

...fall to pieces...

...again...

Buttons, the whole fucking thing
is about buttons now.

All right.

You ain't about to close, are
you, yet?

Uh, yeah, but just for you, man.

Everyone else can stay.

I love you, man.

I think I'm getting a call from
someone who needs a beer,

- but the unfortunate thing is...
- I won't do that anymore, maybe.

Senses.

That's something I appreciate.

- Yeah.
- You wake up in the morning

and you go outside,

and you smell the dew on the
grass and it has a real...

To me, a very nice smell.

It awakens your senses, and all
of a sudden,

maybe you feel like you're just
part of everything.

Right, right.

That... that is beauty, and
actually, I... you're making me
realize

I haven't smelled that smell in
a long time.

I... I don't know if that's 'cause
I'm not waking up at the right
time of day

or because my sense of smell is
shot, but I haven't smelled that
in a long time.

Me too. Every now and then, it
works.

But, um, when I first started
being an actor,

it's like I was always after
truth, I was after truth,

I wanted the truth of every
scene, I wanted the truth of
every line.

You sucked every time, that's
why no one hired you.

After I'd been doing it for a
while,

um, I kind of realized that
truth...

- Even if you did find it...
- Bruce, you all right over there
by your lonesome self?

And so I started going after
beauty instead.

I... I started going after... I
started going after what pleases
the eye...

Shoot yourself in the fucking
forehead!

Pleases the spine.

- Your spine? Get a pistol and...
- When something goes up the back
of your spine.

Get a pistol and shoot yourself!

- What is that?
- You're an idiot!

Uh oh, somebody was not nice.

- Ira.
- Sorry.

Yeah, yeah. And there is some
truth to that...

Dumbass.

Huh?

- What's it called?
- Long Day's Journey into Night.

That wasn't me!

Is this a real thing, is this
really happening?

20's?

Yes, it is.

Thank you for asking how I'm
doing.

Thank you. What's going on?

What do you... Ira, there's a call
for you, homeboy.

What... what's going on, what do
you need?

Yeah, hold on. Ira, you gotta go
to work, dude.

Where?

Let me deal with him. I'll get
him out the door, I promise.

All right, thanks, bye.

Ira, I got terrible news for
you, man, which I also can't
believe,

but you're apparently supposed
to be at work someplace right
now.

Where am I working at?

All right.

See, he believed me.

It's probably the first person
who did.

Ira.

What?

You gotta go to work.

Can I finish my drink first?

You can take this one with you.

Take this one with you.
Which one do you want?

Here, look, I'll pour it in a
cup for you.

Look, I don't like being the
bearer of bad news.

I don't like answering this
phone for any reason, actually.

Where do I gotta work at?

- Huh?
- Where do I gotta work at?

Can we get subtitles on him?

Where has he gotta work at?

And maybe find a travel
agent, 'cause they have
all the inside information.

There are so many choices to
consider, from the style
of the cruise to the
destination.

Uh, I have a strategy to
cruising, Sean.

Okay, I get onboard, I go to
my room, I drop my
luggage.

-Then, I'm out of the room,
I'm out. -No, we gotta do a
run...

Hey, Felix, what kind of deals
you got for me today, man?

This deals, that deals, drug
deals.

Well, there's a bit of a rush
right now, so I'll try to hold
your chair for you.

Can I give you a hand?

Which way is the bathroom?

It's on the left.

- To the left.
- Hell yeah.

Second door on the left.

See, when you in a platoon,

I don't care what color, race
you is, it don't have nothing to
do with that.

- No. -Like, you in my platoon
with me,

and something happen to you,

and you get killed,

it's like something died in me,

'cause you were my friend.

You had my back and I had yours.

So...

You supposed to feel glad about
it?

No, I didn't feel glad about it.

A lot of 'em didn't come back.

A whole bunch of 'em.

I lost count.

But I made it back.

My man.

Marc?

I might be calling you.

Yeah, all right. Well, let me
know, I'm ready.

Is it someone in the building?

God dammit, Lowell.

Hey, we'll put... we'll put the
cab ride on the bar, how's that
sound?

It's been nice, man.

I'm fucked up.

I know.

They... they got you covered.

You know what I remember
about this place?

You're good, you're good.

Ira, Ira, you can't sit back
down.

- I'm good.
- You can't sit back down.

It's time to go.

- Your beer is finished.
- It's all gone, yeah.

You finished everything.

- Ira, it's over.
- Okay.

That's it for the day.

That's it for the day. Come on.

Come on.

Straight out.

Yeah, you're getting there, bud.

Let's do it.

Little bit further.

- Good man.
- I know.

Little bit further.

Hey, can we get that car for
Ira?

Alright...

Will I see you tomorrow?

See you tomorrow?

Who the fuck knows, bro?

Well, I'll be here if you'll be
here.

Good luck, man.

- No.
- It's the last fucking day.

I can fuck with him.

-I'm pleased we all know the
rules to this game. -I'm a
paying customer here, aren't I?

If it's the last day, then you
get berated all day.

If you sing this good, I won't
ever insult you again.

I'm not gonna sing this well,
are you kidding me?

Well, don't make him sing.

- He's starting.
- No pressure.

Come on!

Let him sing if he wants to.

- Go ahead on.
- Shh!

- You can sing.
- You don't want that.

♪ I was all right for a while ♪

♪ I could smile for a while ♪

♪ Then I saw you last night ♪

♪ Held my hand so tight ♪

♪ As you stopped to say "Hello"
♪

♪ Though you wished me well ♪

♪ You couldn't tell ♪

♪ I'd been crying over you ♪

♪ Crying over you ♪

He's almost as good as the
jukebox.

He's pretty all right.

He's not bad at all.

I've missed you guys, I've
missed it.

I wanted to see you guys before
this whole thing was over.

You're gonna enjoy this shit,
dude.

♪ Crying ♪

♪ Crying, it's hard to
understand ♪

♪ That the touch of your hand ♪

♪ Can start me crying ♪

Feel free to sing along.

♪ I thought that I was over you
♪

♪ But it's true, so true ♪

Cheryl! ♪ I love you even more ♪

♪ Than I did before ♪

♪ But, Cheryl, what can I do? ♪

♪ You don't love me ♪

♪ And I'll always be ♪

Can't sing that high right now.

♪ Over you ♪

- ♪ Crying over you ♪
- It's too high for me.

And here's the other thing I
want you to see that is very,
very, very important.

We are saying the same things.

We are saying the same things,
and if we calm down a little,

we will recognize
we're saying the same things.

Yeah, there you go.

Yeah, okay.

Yeah, I should have given it
another foot.

Yeah.

All right, let's do the same
thing over here.

Hey, Pam.

Hey!

- Where you at, darling?
- Where's my honey bunny?

Long time no see.

- Looking for...
- Welcome to the party.

- Thank you. -Did you see
Michael's decorations?

Look how good a job he's doing.

- Wow.
- Right?

A special occasion, you know?

Can I get a Bud Light please?

Of course you can.

Hi, yeah!

I've been looking all over for
you.

Well, baby, you found me.

You look so pretty.

Can I sit in this chair?

A government that is tone
deaf to citizens.

And they've got real hope on
this guy.

And I'm listening to people
from my own community who
are scared to death

because they don't... they
don't trust him.

Why should all of our hope be
in one person and not in
each other?

Oh, wait, that was yours.

Sorry, man, I'm sorry.

See how far it'll go.

I can't wait to see who this is.

- Rikki!
- Oh my God.

Rikki!

Stop, you stop, you stop.

- Oh my God, how are you?
- Hi!

Where else would you be?

- We can drink now, Rikki's here.
- What have you been up to?

Well, um...

oh my God, um...

I... I'm working a lot.

Um, I'm acting a little.

- Yes. -And, uh, today I'm
drinking a lot.

High five!

Fixing to go get me a nice,
nice, little, juicy cocktail.

Juicy cocktail!

You look really spectacular.

-You look really spectacular.

- Those were the, uh, carnado...
- I work a lot.

Yeah, you do.

I work more than most, I'm
happy.

- I got till, like, five.
- Oh, okay, all right, all right.

It is awesome, awesome,
awesome, awesome to see you.

Yeah, no, I... when he told me you
were in...

When he told me you were coming
down, I was so fucking thrilled.

- Yeah.
- I was so fucking thrilled,

'cause I... 'cause I've missed
you.

And your sweetheart, you've been
like five years, right?

- No, eight years.
- Eight years, eight years?

Damn, I didn't...

- I know, time flies, doesn't it?
- Oh, damn.

And I've never... I don't think
I've ever even met him.

What's his name?

- Brian.
- Ryan or Brian?

- Brian.
- Brian, okay.

Well, sooner or later, sooner or
later...

- I'm glad you came back.
- I am the worst fucking...

It's been waiting on you.

- Just picked it up.
- What did I say?

- A lot has happened.
- Yeah, yeah.

Well, you and I
haven't been in touch.

Right.

Are you still... are you still
cooking?

- Absolutely.
- All right, I'll find you there.

- You can come by.
- I might, I might.

- Definitely.
- At least for a stop by.

- Yes! -Okay, you know, I need
your phone number,

'cause I have... I lost that two
cell phones ago.

Well, you got me on Facebook.

Yeah, that's true.

All right, John's taking his
pants off.

Does anyone have a problem with
that?

John wants to take his pants
off.

John wants to take his pants
off?

All right.

Okay, I feel like taking my
pants off.

Well, OK. I feel much better.
Thank you, John. Feel much
better.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, I know.

What kind of a...
What kind of a party is it

if an Australian guy
doesn't take his pants off?

I've been saying that for years.

Rikki, come on back after your
show.

All right. I'll sing a duet with
you if you come back after your
show.

Okay, now if you're gonna
threaten me, I'm not coming.

It's the plumber.

I've come to fix the sink.

Shay, woo!

Shay!

- Hey.
- There's my girl.

How you doing?

Did Rikki go out the back?

- Hi sweetie.
- Hey, how are you?

How's my baby boy?

- I love you.
- He's good.

Um, actually I'm pissed off at
him.

I tell you what, this is getting
complicated.

- Shay looks more motivated.
- There we go.

Here we go.

And Marc's bartending career
ends on a whimper rather than a
bang.

Yup, it was fun while it lasted,
you bastards.

There we go.

I still want my fucking dance.

Uh, I want a pony but I'm not
gonna get one anytime soon.

If you shovel enough shit, you
will.

♪ Waltzing Matilda ♪

♪ Waltzing Matilda, something
you'll come Waltzing Matilda
with me ♪

♪ And they sang and they danced
as they something about a
billa-bong ♪

♪ You'll come Waltzing Matilda
with me ♪

Don't forget your brown bag full
of explosives.

That was so cute.

You gotta wait. We gotta do that
shit all at the same time.

- I can't wait.
- We ready?

I know how it works.

You gotta, you know.

That is what I thought it was.

Cheers.

Wait, wait.

You ready?

- Cheryl.
- Cheers, love you, babe.

Love you too, sweetie.

Yes, all right.

Right.

- Have a safe trip.
- Fuck it.

Safety first.

- Safety first!
- Yeah, darling.

I'm out.

Thank you. I'll take a hug.

- Safety first.
- Thank you, man.

I'll be seeing all you weirdos
again.

Give me a hug, Pam.

You've always been the sweetest
bartender ever.

It's all the booze I give you,
that's why you like me.

Marc, you're an asshole, but
you're my asshole.

Oh, I've always wanted to be
your asshole.

Can you get on all fours and let
me ride you back?

I want to... I want to spank you,
ride the wild horse,

'cause you're the wild horse of
the whole fucking gang.

We gonna spank you and ride the
horse.

Ooh yeah, ooh yeah!

Stay close.

Stay close and check in in two
hours.

You gonna be in the alley?

- Hanging out?
- Yeah.

Do you understand what I said?

Check in with me in two hours
or I'll send 'em after you.

And, Tra, if you see Pam out in
the alley, head the other
direction.

Walk the other way.

She's on a roll tonight.

...pull the wool over my eyes.

I might decide to check in in
two hours.

If you don't, Tra, you know
what's up.

- Do what I said.
- Cockblocked.

That's what I heard.

- That's your boy?
- That's my boy.

Oh yeah, he came in at 3 AM this
morning.

He came in at 3 AM this morning
for the first time in his life,

and looked at me like, "What?"

but there's a no parking sign
and a traffic cone in my
backyard...

...with their names in Sharpie
on it.

But I know that they better not
be out again, and I got the gate
keys and they're not allowed to
get it.

And I'm putting those Coke
bottles that are broke on top of
it or something like them other
people do.

Oh!

Like, I don't know what to do
with him right now.

All I can do is love him and
worry.

I worry for him out in the city,
you know?

Yeah.

Hey bud, just giving you a
call here, man.

I just wanted to hear about
your afternoon deal, man,

what... what the deal was,

see if you was able to get
those good groceries.

Hey Pete, you got the keys?

- No.
- That's it.

Einstein trying to figure out
how to shut off the lights.

So anyway, brother, give me a
holler.

Big believer in Murphy.

Got it, let's go.

That's it, dude. One at Sunny's,
then I gotta hit up Lyla at the
Can-Can.

Okay.

You must have some song you love
more than any other.

Everybody does.

You like, uh...

- Oh! -Oh, yeah, that "Jack
Daniels, If You Please"?

Wish y'all would pick something
worth a damn.

I miss bartending.

I know you do, girl.

- Sometimes.
- I will miss it.

You will, trust me.

All right, now we're gonna have
to wait for a minute 'cause
this...

Whatever this is is gonna have
to finish playing.

Okay, but I don't have to wear a
hat.

No, you don't have to wear a
hat.

That wasn't part of the deal.

You're all right, baby.

You're all right, baby.

You gonna be all right tonight?

- I'm gonna be fine.
- Oh, don't... oh, man.

Tired of being here.

Nothing to hold me back anymore.

He's gone, Tra's good, I'm
ready.

Been here too long.

Man, and you got to do it too.

- Gots to.
- Got to.

- I'm excited.
- I was... I was able to do that

and I just enjoyed the hell out
of it.

Where'd you go?

Well, when I was...

twenty-three maybe, two or three
or four, two, three, four,

and they put me... my first seven
years, I had 27 different
addresses,

and they were all over the
Southeast.

And then I went to Los Angeles
and Denver.

It was hard on marriages, don't
get me wrong,

but it was fun like a sumbitch.

How many times you been married?

I...

uh, legally twice.

How many was pretend?

It was like... it was like a
couple, it was three or four or
five?

I would think, that would be my
first guess.

Jesus.

You know, little mistakes like
that are okay.

It's okay to fuck up.

It's okay to be wrong.

It's okay, you just wipe the
slate clean and...

What did you write down?

Pam, Pam?

Pam, what did you write down on
the board?

The board that they erased, what
did you write down that got
erased?

- Nothing! -Nothing, you had
nothing you regretted?

- No.
- They wasted that board?

When I was a kid, I wrote on the
chalkboard,

"What do you wanna do when you
grow up?"

I said, "Be immature."

So I already wrote mine down
when I was five.

- What did you do?
- Did they erase that?

No, I was already immature.

That was my dream in life.

The American dream.

Immature.

That's me.

Dumb blonde, stupid Pam.

You know what?

It's all good.

I have more fun than all of
y'all ever have in your life.

I doubt that.

Come on!

Kamari!

Oh, that's my little brother!

Hi darling, I'll be right with
you.

And that's my bigger brother.

I ain't really that much bigger.

- Uh huh.
- I'm a little bit bigger.

A little bit.

How you doing, baby?

You look so handsome.

Thank you, I feel beautiful
today.

Good.

God damn, you look awesome.

- Hey darling.
- Hi.

- Thank you.
- Those are for you?

Last time I got the couch,

but I don't know if she got the
bed,

'cause you didn't invite me to
the bed.

- The couch here?
- Gave me the couch.

His couch or this couch?

Because this couch is my couch.

No, he told me his couch.

So what city is Melbourne,

like, if you could compare it
to, like, an American city?

- New York.
- New York, okay.

All right.

Doesn't sound bad though.

I want to ask you something.

- Okay.
- Come here.

I mean, just imagine New York
in proximity to kangaroos.

What's up with the brown bag?

Don't ask about the brown bag.

I'll get it from you at some
point,

and that will be that.

I am part of the most fucking
entitled, selfish, privileged
generation ever to ruin the
planet.

And... yeah, I personally am a big
loser on that one.

I'm sorry, I... I overslept one
morning and...

I overslept one morning and the
bottom fell out of
manufacturing.

I'm really sorry.

Is it your fault that my
Cadillac is so shitty?

Uh, no, that wasn't me.

That was my neighbor.

Your neighbor?

I... I listen to people bitch
about how entitled and whiny and
privileged twenty-somethings
are,

and fuck that, fuck that.

The only way this planet is
gonna survive maybe is if
everybody my age and older dies

before everything is destroyed.

Not the planet, but the species.

- You're right about...
- Whichever, the planet...

The planet will go on happily
without us,

but, uh, you're right, for
humans to do well, y'all need to
go.

If would mercy kill me tonight,
that would be good.

You know what, I'm gonna... I got
a few things I'm gonna say about
it.

Say I'm a trillionaire,
billionaire, whatever.

And I pay for all my
campaigns...

Don't need the money.

Don't know a damn thing about
politics.

Do you think he will make a good
president?

I'm gonna tell you right... Trump.

- Trump?
- Yeah.

You know what's gonna happen?

Two things gonna happen.

They will either impeach his ass

or somebody gonna assassinate
him just like they did Kennedy.

- The thing... -I'm... you... you're
interrupting me.

- I'm sorry. -I'm telling you
what's gonna happen.

Okay, I'm glad you know.

A heap see, but a few know.

And I'm just telling you what I
know.

You got the United States
sending them our firepower.

- Good cooking?
- Yeah.

- Good company?
- Yeah.

- Some wine.
- Plenty of beer.

It's Thanksgiving every day.

- Every day.
- Every day.

Every day.

Fuck the turkey, let's eat some
steak.

Fuck the steak, let's drink some
beer and smoke some weed

and drink some beer.

Tomorrow's another day.

- Tomorrow's another day.
- Tomorrow's another day.

And let all these kids figure it
out themselves,

- But they're smoking weed and
drinking beer too. -I know.

But they're not listening to us.

They never had it hard like we
did.

They never had to go out and
milk the goats and go out and
bail hay.

-I never had it hard. -And they
never had to fucking load hay
bails.

They never had to work like we
did, none of them, not one of
'em.

We worked hard.

They don't even know what work
is.

God, how did that... how did that
beer get so empty so fast?

-'Cause when you get in the
military, you can get a... -Same
here, that's why I went.

You can get a better
education...

Well, I mean, that's what they...
that's what the government like
to sell us,

like, "Come fight for us, we'll
'take care of you.'"

- Not to fight, hey, just hang
out. -Yeah.

What it... what it was for me in
2000,

"Hey, just hang out here, we're
gonna teach you some cool
skills,

you'll get to serve your
country, no wars."

Last thing that happened was the
Cole.

You're fine, everything's fine.

And then next thing you know,
you're in war for 15 years.

Yeah.

Horseshit.

Stupid wars, mostly.

We liked it, though.

It's good for a lot of people.

It's good for people.
I'm glad I did it.

I learned a lot.

You like it, I love it.

I'm glad I did it.

All right, boys, I'll be back.

Twenty dollars, who's got
Adderall?

No one? No one's got Adderall?

And why is it you need money
again?

Um, we need extra chips.

Mm-hm.

- Oh really?
- I bet.

I love you. I seen that cigar
wrapper outside.

You didn't see nothing.

Thank you for checking in.

I told you I'd check in.

Clean out your fingernails.

I know they're dirty.

They're gross.

I'm just glad I got to know you

because you been right here
on my heart ever since.

And when you lost your wife...

Listen.

I don't want to go there
and I don't want to hurt you.

I lost my son, you lost her.

We have stuff in common.

The biggest thing that meant
anything to us.

And you've always been there.

And I love her.

I'm gonna tell you this.

You know what, I gotta tell you.

I'm not over her yet.

- I'm not. -I lost my son and you
picked me up.

Then you lost her.

And you never quit caring about
me

and I wasn't there for you.

I wish I could have been.

I wish I could have been there
like you were for me.

You were there for me and I
wasn't there for you.

I wish I would have been there
for you

like you were there for me.

- It's all right.
- You're so special.

"Hey Paul, can you get me some
toilet paper?

I got a bad situation here!"

Sure.

Holy shit.

Where is that... where's that
balloon that says "the end"?

Let me get you right in front of
this, where it says "the end."

Hang on, hang on.

Uh, uh, uh, what are... uh!

You are...

Profile, profile.

This is as profile as my neck
gets.

Turn your fucking chair.

- Come on.
- Pam, Pam!

- Turn your chair.
- Pam!

- I'll just take a picture.
- Enough.

Believe me.

The end.

I don't need your face in there.

I don't need my face in there
either, baby.

-Yo, but, dude, look, you gotta
understand... -Just imagine
that.

It only takes five ounces of
plutonium to change the balance
of the earth.

And some of these
countries... yeah, but some of
these, including us,

us alone, we own over, like,
fucking... it's a lot of fucking
plutonium.

The white trash fucking garbage
person that I am, that's what I
fucking want.

- You want us to have Fireball.
- Fuck yeah I do.

You think I'm better than
Fireball? I'm not.

You don't look 60.

- Yeah, I'm 60.
- You don't look it.

Look at my titties.

Oh, wow!

Sixty-year-old titties.

Those don't... don't seem like
60...

Sixty.

I'm 60 years old.

Those are not... I'll say they're
like a solid, like, 30.

Sixty.

Sixty-year-old titties.

They look really... those are good
titties.

- Really?
- Those are good titties.

- So I'm not fallen yet?
- No, those are good titties.

- You should be proud of those.
- I've see nutsacks farther than
that.

Nutsacks are... an
eight-year-old's nutsacks look
worse than your titties.

I divorced a man one time
because his nutsack hung down
past his dick.

-That's crazy. -Oh, it was the
saggiest fucking nuts I ever
saw.

He didn't exercise enough.

- I didn't...
- You know what you gotta do?

- Look.
- That's some bad nuts.

When I grew up, they said,

"We must, we must, we must
improve our bust.

The bigger the better,
the tighter the sweater.

And you do it every day, you get
titties like this when you're
60.

-I mean, the titties, those are
nice titties. -You're into
titties now?

But you're fine?

But you're gonna be fine, I
mean? Like...

No, no, I'll be fine.

How much drinking are we gonna
do?

I'm gonna do a fuckton of
drinking

and I plan on doing some cocaine
too.

Let's wait for the... hey, hey,
Felix.

I get it. Hey dude.

Fuck.

Listen, when you're crossing the
street, whether you're right or
wrong,

stay in motion.

That's how that's done.

Yeah.

Yeah!

♪ You surely took some blows ♪

♪ And you did it your way ♪

♪ Now tell me why you're the man
♪

♪ Oh, easy now ♪

♪ If he don't help himself ♪

♪ Then let me leave you with it
♪

♪ He has not ♪

♪ Any time he cannot say the
things ♪

♪ That he truly feels ♪

♪ I'm not the one ♪

♪ Lord go back down ♪

♪ To the record store ♪

♪ Let it show you took some love
♪

♪ And did it your way ♪

This is my boyfriend, this is
Brian.

Brian, this is Al, she used to
bartend here.

Girl, I haven't been in here
since you were working here.

But you know what?

You know what?

White, black, Mexican.

When you get out,
that's what bothers me,

we're all paranoid.

- Yes.
- When you get out.

There's nobody there to back...

We don't have a home,
all our friends have moved away

and you spent all that time.

There's nobody there, nobody.

And you try to find a job,
there's no jobs.

And you just sit there and drink
that.

It doesn't get you
where you want to be.

And you know what hurts me
more than anything,

is nobody appreciate
the service that I did,

- what we did.
- What we did.

And there's nowhere to go,
there's no houses, no homes,

and everybody... when I went and
applied for jobs,

they told me I was
overqualified.

Yeah, overqualified.

Overqualified.
I couldn't get a job.

How the hell can you be
overqualified?

That doesn't... this is just... but
this is just a guy who brought
the Olive...

Wait, Olive Garden lady home.

How do we even know she works
there?

-She's completely nude. -Let's
see if she has a hat or
something.

The guy thought he was doing a
great thing by killing Lincoln.

Amazing, huh?
But people don't know that.

You have to look into the
history in detail.

I'm all right right now.

No you're not.

You're here.

But I don't know.

The thing that...

The thing that hurt me so bad,
you know,

we served this country,

we fought for these people.

And they treat us like we're...

They treat us like shit.

And... and I... I think about it
every day of my life.

Like, when you get lonely,
you have no friends,

you can always come to this bar.

- And feel like family.
- And feel like family.

You know what... you know what I'm
talking about?

I know exactly.

And... I fit in here.

And you, yeah.

- I know.
- And I'm here with you.

Tra!

Come here.

What are you doin'?

Chillin' out in the alley
eating beef jerky.

Let me smell your breath.

Told you I'm drinking b...
I'm eating beef jerky.

Don't let me catch you drinking
again.

I'm not drinking.

I don't trust you.

I'm eating beef jerky, Mom.

- Are you all right?
- Mm-hm.

Ain't nothing.

We won't be here for a little
while longer.

People think we're already
closed.

Stay out of trouble, okay?

♪ Drank down my last swallow ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away,
know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money
when you're sitting at the table
♪

♪ There'll be time enough for
countin' when the dealin's done
♪

♪ You've got to know
when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

I gotta get one spin in.

There we go.

I mean, is there any other place
you go?

I mean, to get out?

You know I don't.

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

This is home and you're my
family.

Believe me, I've got a shitty
family.

Yeah, you must.

Never mind, I don't feel like
bitching every time I open my
mouth.

That is a overused word.

I am somebody you hang out with
in the bar.

I am not your family.

You know what I mean.

No, actually I don't.

You guys are... you guys are all I
got.

Well, you do actually have a
home where you sleep.

I've got a bed.

Do you have two?

No, I've got a bed.

- You have a couch?
- I got a couch.

Do you use it very much?

You want a couch?

I like couches.

Oh... oh, oh, baby, oh, baby, oh,
baby.

You all right, sweetheart?

You hold onto my shoulders.

Up, up, up, up, up.

Okay, all right, now, you all
right?

We're gonna take your glasses
with us.

I've been better than ever.

All right, we are gonna...
We are gonna take a walk.

You can't kill bad grass.

I want you to ask your... I want
you to ask yourself the
question,

"Have I met my love?"

Have I met my love?

Have I met my love? Just that.

- All right?
- Ca-ca-ca-ca-caw.

Fuck y'all.

Have a nice day.

- Love you, Pam.
- You too, Pam.

Tell 'em how you really feel,
Pam.

Oh!

I feel... I feel...

Hey, y'all have a nice evening.

This is the last night and y'all
enjoy yourselves.

I'll call you.

'Cause I'm gonna fuck myself
all night long.

I'm gonna miss all y'all.

- Yeah, and I'm, I'm fuckin...
- All right, that's good.

- All right, three cuts or two
cuts... -I'll call you.

...to your left, one, two,
and then re-stack it back up.

Ca-ca-ca-ca-caw.

All right, and the wait, no.

Okay, have you met...
Have you met your love?

One or one yes or no question.

You okay?

No.

I'm sorry, no.

However many people
you are in love with right now,

none of them is your love.

You have a little time to wait.

Shit, I oughta take you home
with me.

Listen, I would tear your ass
up.

Okay, you just gotta tear my ass
up.

I'll be right there with it.

And then we'll make up...
We'll make up the next morning.

I bet I would, I would... I'd
destroy your ass, you know I
would.

Do it.

- Look, you're happy.
- I want you to do it.

Lord, look, you're sweet on me
now, but just you wait.

I'm... I'm a... I'm a destroyer of
men.

He's in love with a lot of
people.

Yeah, me too.

The more people you're in love
with the easier it is.

You don't think it's more
complicated, that
responsibility, man?

You're only responsible to your
own heart,

so it's like one thing.

You don't feel...
You don't feel...

I'm not... I'm not in a
relationship with everyone I'm
in love with.

'Cause if you had met your love
already, then you would have
said it.

Yeah, I got a lot of life left
to be very upset.

But, uh, in my head,
I don't really believe that,

You got traditional values in
the back of your head somewhere.

- Yeah, yeah, I gotta... I gotta...
- You just have to let that go.

Well, I'm able to operate as a
person.

The best thing is to just get
your heart totally smashed and
broken a couple times

and then you're good,
then you don't care anymore.

Hey, this is Pam, you Hot Pants.

I want to dance.

Leave me a message.

Hey, baby, I made it back to the
bar, everything's all good,

and I'm fixing to stay here
till we all done dancing

on down the road, bye.

You didn't come here to take a
nap.

And we are not making out right
now.

Ever?

But you will clean this bar up.

- With you.
- You will clean this entire bar.

You throw one more piece of
shit...

- You're cleaning this bar.
- Fine.

Have you ever been to England,
London?

That's one of my me... next
things.

I have to do that and I
also... Ireland.

I'm gonna do that
within the next five years.

I know how to use a vacuum.

I bet you know how to use other
things.

If you didn't know, you were
gonna learn tonight.

I know how to wash dishes.

I'm a pretty good stepdad
usually.

Oh, you trying to be stepdaddy
to Tra?

I mean, I'm stepdad to, like,
a bunch of other people's kids.

- Huh?
- How is Tra?

Okay, stepdaddy, I could use
some child support any day now.

Listen, are you trying to rap to
this girl?

I am, most definitely.

Well, come straight up.

I mean, it's so boring for me to
listen to this.

Give me your best, man.

Just tell the girl what you want
and she'll tell you yes or no.

I'm also saying, like, you need
to get your ass out there,

you got a lot of people that
really like you and that...

And then I don't have to listen
to this shit, you know,

otherwise I've gotta move
to the other end of the bar.

-Move over boy. -Just watch out
for her pretty little feet
there.

(whistling Star Spangled Banner)

O-kay, get it together, son.

Get your shit together.

Get your shit together.

The hazards of the night.

Give me a second, I'm going on
it.

The hazards of the night are
hostile to us, all of us.

Even you.

Whose name I know.

And you, Bruce,
whose name I know too.

- And to you. -How do you... how do
you put me in that shit?

I'm telling you, I already got
it in here.

How you bring me in that shit?

Indeed, many of us know many
names.

So it's not surprising that some
would have us stay at home a
little longer to rest, to wait.

In this city of sin, here,
this state of Nevada,

this grand faded oubliette
of these United States

was not built by them
who wanted and rested...

You can't even read.

I can too read, Bruce.

I ain't say you can't read,
I said you can't read that.

This country was conquered by
those who moved forward, and so
will we.

- Say that.
- I did say it.

Do it. Give me your card.

I wrote this earlier.

I know you wrote it.

But why, some say, the bar?

Why this bar?

- Why do we identify this as our
joint? -I don't know why.

- Comfort.
- I don't know.

- Comfort, maybe.
- Comfort.

- What else?
- Comfort.

- Oh, my God.
- Accessibility.

- And...
- Comfort and accessibility.

It's alcohol,
it's the alcohol mostly.

It's all right, it's the alcohol
and it's...

I'm gonna tell you what else it
is.

It's a place where you can go
when nobody else don't want your
ass.

Motherfucker, it's in there,
I got it worked in there.

That's where it's at.

When nobody else
don't want your ass,

you can come in here
and have a good time.

Nobody want my ass, so that's
why I'm in here.

We must find somewhere
else to get drunk.

Thanks to technology,
the drinks are inside of us.

Thanks to Shay.

Yay!

I've done my job.

We ask God's blessing on this,

our last and hopefully our best
evening.

- Is the last page?
- I think so.

- Except, for me...
- Oh, shit.

After this, I'm leaving the
city, fuck y'all.

- This city sucks.
- Fuck you too.

Y'all can get fucked.

- Thank you.
- Ow!

Ladies and gentlemen...

- To the bar!
- To the bar!

To the bar!

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

Dammit, I gotta light it on fire
again.

Burn everything!

Woo!

Yeah!

Every time I came back to base
I started to design this house.

But somehow I could never get it
to look like my idea of it.

Now it almost does.

You just walk in,
a stranger out of nowhere,

and for the first time it all
lights up.

And I'm sure you know why.

Because you have the gift for
life, Roslyn.

The rest of us, we're just
lookin' for a place to hide and
watch it all go by.

Amen.

Here's to your life, Roslyn.

I hope it goes on forever.

And yours, Isabelle.

Go, go, go, go.

Just one more thing
and we can go back inside.

Well, there was gonna be cake,
but now there's not cake no
more.

That's it, that's it for the
drugs.

That's called arrogance.

Just dance, dude, chill out.

- Shut the fuck up.
- You shut the fuck up.

You've been out there with my
kid.

Is he okay?

Yeah, he's fine.

- No, he's not drunk.
- "No, man, I hate those things.

- Why'd my mom show you?"
- No, he's cool.

-Usually he's like, "Why did my
mom show you that?" -He's really
cool.

- I know.
- I know.

- I raised him.
- He's fucking cool as fuck.

I know.

You look good, mama.

- No, he's a really fucking
awesome kid. -I know.

Tra, slow down, slow down, dude.

Slow down.

I think I should go dance with
John.

I probably should dance with
John.

Where is he?

Come here.

I think I gave him too much
acid.

- Come dance with me.
- Come on.

Yeah!

You have to.

Yes.

Terrible awfulness.

Yes, that's what I'm talking
about.

Thank God for your fucking James
Murphy.

Okay.

Thank you. Who gave him a beer?

- Will you do me a favor?
- Yes.

Will you go outside and tell
him,

in the presence of whoever's
there,

that if I catch anybody giving
him alcohol...

- I already did that.
- That's their ass.

- I already did that.
- All right.

Make it good. Make it good.

- Thanks, baby.
- I love you, Michael.

- Thank you for the dance.
- Always good to see you.

I'll put you... I'll put you two
in touch.

All right, please do.

All right.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

- Yeah.
- My driver is here.

Your driver.
I mean, I figured, but...

My designated driver
is with me, so I'm all good.

All right.

See you later.

I don't wanna dance.

Fuck.

I spoke...

I don't... I don't know,

ya tell me something.

- One thing.
- Anything.

Because your... your mind is an
interesting mind.

Why are you so mad at me?

Everything you say to me is an
insult.

- You are older.
- Yeah.

That's the number one issue.

The number one reason I'm
older... I'm mad at you is because
you're old... old guy.

- Right.
- And I think your generation

destroyed my country.

How young is your grandkids?

I don't have grandkids.

I don't have kids, I don't have
grandkids.

I look after old ladies
and I clean houses

and I contribute to my world
and fuck you.

Now you can blame me
generationally as much as you
want,

and it's appropriate to do so,

because my generation fucked up.

But if you continue...
If you continue to condense...

-I'm ready... I'm ready to fight
right away, right away. -Oh,
fuck you.

- If you continue...
- I will fight you in a second.

- It's for TV, I don't care.
- Shut up, shut up, you little
punk.

Shut up, you little
self-involved punk.

You got... you got nothing, man,
you got nothing.

I got more than you do.

Everybody's getting along
tonight, right?

Yep, not bad.

I represent all evil.

- As long as it's not in my bar.
- That's awfully judicious.

That seems awfully judicious.

You don't represent evil.

You represent, uh,
didn't do shit.

No, I'm worse than evil, I don't
give a fuck about your evil.

I've heard what you've got.

- You know, suck a dick, man.
- Yeah, I've heard.

Yeah, I offered that too.

You should have done better.

♪ Our noses right off our faces
♪

♪ Won't be nothing but big old
hearts dancing in our eyes ♪

I'm serious, suck a dick
actually.

David, you want your dick
sucked, say the word.

I mean, like, you was bad at
being alive

and your generation is bad at
that too.

You upset as well?

Whatever, I don't give a god
damn.

I'll catch you, bro.

Trust fall.

Trust fall, don't worry.
I'm not gonna put my knee out.

Come on, bro, I got you.

- Aw, dude.
- I didn't catch you, bro.

I'm fucked up.

'Cause when I wake up, you're
not there.

What?

That's just how my life is now.

And you drink Cape Cods, dude.

What?

Pete.

Pete!

Don't yell at me, man.

Pete.

You all right, darlin'?

We ain't gotta worry about it
after tonight.

That feels real.

Too real.

What do you want to drink,
darlin'?

Iceberg!

- It won't do any good...
- You all right, baby?

You want a shot of Peppermint
Schnapps?

You know how much I love you?

I like for you to tell me over
and over.

Girl...

I think you're the best.

The best?

The best.

You know... you know what it is,
do you?

'Cause you serve me
when I'm drunk.

- Goodnight, Bruce.
- Goodnight, all y'all.

Peace be unto you.

Peace be unto you, too.

Love all y'all.

You have to get up.

You have to actually get up.

Shh, I'm getting up.

I'm getting up.

I know, you're helping me...
Oh, that's better.

You're helping me get up.

Jesus.

I didn't think I was ever gonna
fall asleep.

You just fell asleep,
now you have to get up.

Shh.

Stop saying that, I'm awake.

You're awake but you have to get
up.

And you've gotta get out of
here.

- You've gotta get up. -You... no,
no, no, shut up a second.

All right, what?

You gotta get out of here.

Out of where?

- This bar?
- Yes.

How old am I?

I don't know.

I know, I don't want to play
that game.

- 45.
- Right, shut up.

I'm 58.

- That's tough, man, shit.
- Shut up.

I'm 58, I look like I'm 70.

Uh-huh.

Right?

Right? Right?

Kind of.

Come on.

So, I mean, that's not a bad
thing.

You gotta get out of here.

People want a lot
out of their last nights.

...from their last
presentations.

Hey, darlin', are you okay?

Do you remember me?

Shay?

Look at me.

Hello.

It's not how I wanted this to
end, but, hey, whatever.

It's not endin', it just began.

I used to... I used... I used to...

I used to be an actor.

- Uh-huh.
- Uh-huh.

And I used to be pretty good at
it.

Now what, now what?

Now I'm asleep here.

- All right?
- Okay.

And I'm not an actor anymore.

You just quit or you quit a
while ago?

I quit a while ago.

And now I just come to the bar,
yes, exactly.

You're figuring it out.

You're a bright boy,
you're figuring it out.

You need to get out of here
while you're still a musician.

Just out of this bar?

Stop.

Yeah, all right, yeah, that's a
good start, that's a good start.

Get out of this bar
and don't go into another one.

And don't go into another one
after that.

All right?

'Cause you, come on,

'cause you're still young

and you can still do...

You can still do something
other than what I've done.

All right?

All right?

And there is nothing,
I promise you,

I promise you,
'cause I have looked,

there is nothing more boring,

there is nothing more "Oh, my
fuck, is he ever gonna go away"

than a guy who used to do stuff

who doesn't do stuff no more

because he's in a bar.

All right?

Yeah, yeah.

You promise?

No, I don't promise anything.

Come on, come on, please.

If you promise me, I'll get up.

Honest to God, man,
this is gonna fuck you up.

Anybody want a drink, a shot,
tell a story?

I don't want to be your
girlfriend, Pete.

Do you not want to make out?

- That's cool.
- I have drugs all the time.

I don't care.

Hey.

I want to dance.

Leave me a message.

We could just kill you.

That would be awesome.

Don't kill my roommate.

Y'all seem like a bunch of
dingdongs, I'm not gonna lie.

No, let's get wild, I don't
care.

I'm wild.

You got something strong in you?

You got some extra power?

You seem like an old Einstein
type of cat,

don't got no sense at all.

No, don't fucking play into that
fucking shit too.

You got some flavor? If you got
flavor, baby, I'm ready for some
flavor.

You seem weak as fuck.

Whatever, like, you ain't got
nothing I guess?

You seem like two weak
motherfuckers, actually.

That's my reckoning of this
shit.

Like, I ain't got to worry about
you at all.

- That's my thought.
- No, you don't have to worry.

That's my thought.

That's my thing.

Stay on your side.
Stay on your side.

I'm coming, let's go,
let's fight, let's get wild.

Are you fighting my fucking,
a fucking old man?

-This motherfucker is like 40
years older than you. -Come on,
let's go outside.

I don't give a damn how old
people are.

- I don't care about it.
- You want to fight an old man?

- Let's go outside. -What is
wrong with you mentally?

What is wrong with you mentally?

Do you want it?
Do you want it yourself?

I don't want it,
you want to punch me?

Hey!

Why do you want to fight an old
man?

I've done told you twice.

He's an old man.

- You are a fucking old man.
- Sit down.

Are you all weak bitches?

- Are y'all both weak bitches?
- We're not weak.

- Don't touch my shit.
- Yo!

- I'll kill you.
- No one wants to fight.

Yo!

No violence, dude.

- I'll gonna fuck you up bad,
son. -You want to fight?

- You want to just...
- We'll go outside.

- Yo.
- Yeah?

You need to leave.

I probably do.

I agree. Come here.

Sit right here until I call you
a cab.

Well, you're not starting shit
anymore tonight.

So you can either sit down
and wait for your cab

They've been starting shit
for my taste.

I'm happy to.
Let me get my drink.

I agree, right there.

You don't have to hand it me,
son, Australia,

go on, stay in your own joint.

It doesn't require commentary.

I'll give you some commentary.

Wow, are you trying to kill me?

I'll do it.

-That was... that was too much
acid. -What's going on out my
door?

-The number of acids need to be
less. -I don't know what's going
on.

What is his problemo?

Yo, I'm confused, I don't know.

Do I have to go like get... get
in a street fight at the end?

- That'd be awesome. -You wanna
have a smoke with me, darlin'?

- Huh? -You wanna smoke with me
real quick?

I gotta take care of my
customers.

I'm gonna call you a cab though.

No, no, I'm fine.

I think...

I... I have no problem fighting at
all.

Let him out here, I'll be sweet.

Let's... it'll be...

No, not right now.

I won't beat him up.

Are you sure? 'Cause I...

Get your ass over there, stop.

I stopped needing people to
fight my battles for me when I
was 12.

I'm not fighting your battle.

- I just... -I will send you out
the back door.

- Let me go. -I know, I'm just
trying to hang out with you.

The only reason I fucking hang
out here.

Go sit down.

God dammit.

The hell?

All right.

Can I just play a different song
on the jukebox than this fucking
shit?

- What?
- I don't express my opinion.

- Dude, I'm...
- Him and Harry are... he...

They're like fucking around all
night long.

I was almost asleep too.

Can you give me a pen
so I can write all this?

You okay, baby?

Yes, he's fine.

What's up?

I played this song for you!

It's the only god damn song
I can fuckin' play in the world.

Thank you.

I'm not joking about anything at
all.

Sure you are, Pete.

No, I'm not.

Yeah.

My mom has been dead for 20
years.

It's cool.

What?

Yeah, we're good.

I hang out... I hang out in
cemeteries for 20 years.

Thank you for all your
hospitality.

Anytime.

- It was good while it lasted.
- It was good while it lasted.

While it lasted.

Godspeed to you all.

Godspeed, Bo.

Woo!

It's the most Christian rock
band that ever existed.

So, sorry that...

I don't know, dude,
I went to church last Sunday.

- I don't know what the fuck is
wrong with me. -You did?

- I don't think any of that was
my fault. -Where's your car?

It's right there.

You gonna drive?

I'm thinking about it.

Are you sure?

None of that shit was my fault.

That was fuckin' Pete.

Let me see how the keyhole
feels.

I could drive if you want me to.

Uh...

Man, you're not particularly
adept when you're sober.

I mean, you just tried to fight
a man with eyes tattooed on his
eyelids.

That doesn't mean I'm drunk,
that means I'm right.

I don't wanna drive.

I've spent way more time in
church than all of you
motherfuckers this week.

You out?

- Even me?
- John?

Happy trails.

We have a huge slowdown on
the 15

specifically the slowdown
right now in the
southbound direction.

The lane restriction's in
place in both
directions,

so right now the backup is...

Are you hungry at all or no?

No, but I wouldn't mind a piece
of cake.

I got french fries, I'm just
eating this and french fries.

So what's that, a milkshake?

- I know, but... -They're very
hot, so be careful.

- I know...
- Thank you so much.

Okay, how are you doing?

And that piece of chocolate cake
over there, when you get a
chance.

What kind of milkshake:
strawberry, chocolate, or
vanilla?

- Vanilla, vanilla.
- You want vanilla? Okay.

You want... and you want whipped
cream then, right?

- The sweeter the better.
- Yeah, okay.

Just keep adding to it,
don't worry.

Y'all, I've been sitting here
this whole time thinking that
palm tree is real.

And I think it's a fucking
light.

It is, it's a fucking fake
light.

Yo.

Yo.

Hello, darlin', this is Louis,
darlin'...

I'm freaking fried.

Me too.

Yes, Dana and Beth, I
feel like you're gonna agree
with me,

"I remember when Planet
Hollywood used to be the
Aladdin,"

and anyone who lives in Las
Vegas for a while has
those kinds of memories,

so construction,
nothing unusual for us,

but Clark County says
that the amount of
construction...

Hey, darlin'.

Hey.

Michael.

Michael. You gotta get up.

Time to go.

Come on.

Oh, I'm sorry.

-Come on, let me get you
something to drink. -I gotta
clean up, I gotta clean up.

Let me go... I... I... I'm sorry, I
just...

It's okay, don't worry about it.

You want all this just thrown
out?

Don't worry about it. Here, I'm
gonna get you a drink, okay?

I got it, I'm gonna be here a
while anyway.

Whoa.

Jesus.

Is John gone?

Everybody's gone, boo.

Thought about going to the
Carolinas.

Have you ever been to Myrtle
Beach?

Yeah, I've got family that's
staying out there right now.

I'm about to move to Oregon.

I don't know, Virginia Beach is
really nice.

I don't like the pebbles in the
sand.

Really? See, I really liked it,
I enjoyed it.

People are very nice there.

You gonna be okay drivin'?

You don't know nothin' about me,
do you?

Huh?

I don't know, maybe I'll go to
Spain and watch those bulls.

That sounds cool.

- Can I come?
- Absolutely.

You know you would never leave
all this.

I will miss the holidays here.

It's just special, everybody
always comes out and...

You had a nice place here.