Blondinka za uglom (1984) - full transcript

Hello

Take a seat

Everyone is seated?

May I start? Thank you

Imagine life one day
will become simple for all

Each of us will be
happy, singing, carefree

This time is very near - we
will all become ideal people

In each role we will be faultless

Just as we are in love

This will happen, without doubt

While for now there is
both laughter and sorrow



So let us return to our time

And exaggerate a few things

We will ascertain with a
touch of sadness and shame

That we are capable of becoming heroes

Unfortunately, not all the time

LENFILM

First Creative Union

A fantastic story with
a prologue, an epilogue

and a musical commentary
by Andrei Mironov

Tatyana Dogileva
Andrei Mironov

In the film

A blonde girl around the corner

Script by ALEKSANDR CHERVINSKY

Director VLADIMIR BORTKO



Operators IVAN BAGAEV
VALENTIN KOMAROV

Artist VLADIMIR SVETOZAROV

Composer ISAAC SHWARZ
Sound Operator NATALIYA AVANESOVA

Stage Directors: A. ABAKAROV
A. BURMISTROVA
Editor: V. SHWARZ

Montage: M. AMOSOVA Costumes: Yu. KOLOTKO

Conductor E. HACHATURIAN

Song lyrics:
V. SUMARKOVA
B. RAZERA
V. KONSTANTINOVA

Assistant producers: V.
MIHAILOV N. VASIL'EVA

Operators M. KULIKOV
Montage E. MARTINOVA

Assistant director: T. PUTENKOVA
Photographer: M. LELYA

Decorator: I. MISHINA Sound
recording V. MIHNEVICH

Administrators:
V. GRISHIN R. TUR A. KABAKOV S. SOKOLOV

Film Director: VLADIMIR SEMENEZ

Starring

Gavrila Maksimovich: MARK PRUDKIN Tatiana
Vasil'eva: EVGENIYA HANAEVA Regina:

ELENA SOLOVEI Crocodile: ANATOLY SLIVNIKOV
Rashid Rashidovich BAADUR TSULADZE

Supermarket worker: ANATOLY
RAVIKOVICH, ALEKSEI ZHARKOV

Nervous customer SERGEY BEHTEREV
Ogurzov: PAVEL KADOCHNIKOV

Could you tell me please,
there will be onions for sale?

Excuse me, will there be onions?

He knows

Tell me please, will
there be onions or not?

I am asking you, will there be onions?

I am talking to you - will
there be onions for sale?

The Torpeda team is losing

Goal! Another one!

Yes, that was the last chance
for Torpeda during the match

What a possibility - such
opportunities must be made the most of

Zero - one, torpeda loses

Please could you let me
know, if there will be onions

You will lose your amber ring
in the bet, before you know it

I am here about the onions

Could you tell me...?

You don't know?

Please could you let me
know, if you will have onions?

Take the ring, if they don't want to play

You know me, I would
not feel sad to give away a

diamond ring if only the
bourgeious team was punished

Stop it, I won't take it

Take it, I say! My word is the law

I will earn myself another one,
no problem! I don't undestand...

I honestly don't understand
why our team keeps losing

All the conditions are created for them

They train all year - cars
are there for their taking

Free flats, trips abroad

They have 60 million fans!

And they still lose, the devils!

Excuse me please, I am asking you again

Will onions be for sale?

There is no order in the team

As they write in newspapers - people
act like they have no responsibility

No-one cares about anything

No respect for their role

Because people have become greedy

Forgot how life used to
be - only pasta to eat, but

we were still happy. We
would get together, sing songs

And won, by the way

Now everyone has
everything but it is not enough

If he is sacked from one
place, he will go somewhere else

Comrades, will anyone answer me?

They think too much of themselves

I tell my children - the most
important thing is community

Here is one branch, it is easily snapped

Lots of branches make a
broom - that can't be broken

Football is a group sport -
everyone has become too clever

A person needs to have fear

So, no-one knows anything?

Young man, why are you shouting?

I am asking, will there be onions or not?

He does not want my soul, he wants onions

Do not be rude to me!

The queue sent me

Young man, the queue
could not have sent

you as we do not have
any such organisation

Go to the hall, take the book
of complaints and write in it

I will write!

Write

A real beast, huh? How he looked at me

You are a human though -
you could have talked to him

Next time he would have been wiser

Maybe no-one told him
how he should behave

Maybe he grew up without a mother

He grew up without
Mummy, without Daddy -

can't explain anything
to someone like that

A beast will never become a human

A fool will never become clever

Anyone can be made a human
being if he is approached humanely

Nadya, you exaggerate. Only in
films can you make a person right

In life, a person who all is lost for
can't even be helped by his own mother

I would have helped my son

Yes

Why are there no onions?

Because the alcoholic
heaver is asleep in it

Go and make a human being out of him

Alcoholism is an illness, which should
be treated. Which one is the heaver?

The new one, first day here today

Only the grave will cure him

Each one has his own fate, Nadya

What fate? We do
not believe in that stuff

Reform him. For a bet!

You don't care that
a person is being lost

Do you care?

Yes

If we do not help him,
Rashidik, then who will?

Who will save a person?

Yes... a pessimistic vision

Pessimistic?

Why did you drink in the heat?

You could die like that

I do not think death is
the most frightening thing

A person cannot know if he has
died - he simply no longer exists

If you do not exist, why do you drink?

Why?

Did you get sacked from
your previous job for drinking?

No, I wasn't sacked

An even worse thing
happened - I committed suiside

I've been dead 5 years and I can
tell you - I used to be in love with you

I do not even know your name

Nadezhda

What a miracle

Come on!

Pleasure to meet you

Even though I have been
seeing you every morning

Where?

You were leaving a magically green car

Genas Chrysler

You did not notice me

I really liked you then

And now?

Even more

Now I am a corpse

I am in the afterlife

Stop that! You are in
our life, not the afterlife

We will fight for you

You are lovely

Our professor in the narcotics
clinic is a specialist in alcoholics

If need be - I will
arrange a specialist rehab

centre, if you run
away - we will catch you

No problem. You will stop drinking

Drinking is fairly disgusting

I have nowhere to
run - I really like it here

Well done - realisation
is half of your success

What is your name?

Nikolai Gavrilovich

Like Chernishevsky

Funny, isn't it?

Why funny? A great
russian name and patronymic

A great one

For a great person

You needed to study

I did study

Not the right subjects,
or with the right teachers

Oh not the right
subjects or teachers at all

You see the point

Your head hurts?

It always hurts from something

You persuaded me. But
this is the first and last time

No more alcohol in future. Here you go

I brought you some cold beer

What is this?

Imported beer

Drink it, don't be scared

What a great thing -
I've never seen one like it

You haven't seen many
good things in life in general

That is why you have
such pessimistic thoughts

Pessimistic

Come on. All right, let's get out

I will get you cleaned up

Just listen to me
and all will be in order

Help me a second

No, he is with me

I will arrange it so I can always see you

Whether you want it or not we
will make a human being out of you

Do you want to be human?

Very much

No problem. All the roads are
open for everyone, and for you too

Simply you didn't have
a goal in life up to now

I had the wrong goal, and now none at
all. I do not know what a goal should be

Like everyone else.
Everyone must be happy

It is as though you fell from the moon

That is a very creative
way of putting it.

Yes, I used to be the
man from the moon

Maybe you are not a drinker?

I used to not drink

I thought you were loading furniture into
houses before starting to work for us

No, Naden'ka, I used to work at the
institute of space research, did research

Up to day before yesterday

That is who you look like!

Like who?

Like the TV show presenter
in "World of Animals"

As he starts saying
"Scorpios are uniquely

intelligent" I get
goosepimples all down my back

My kind of man

A scientist

Watch out!

I used to be a scientist

I used to be on TV too

When?

About 15 years ago

Oh... I only watched kids TV back then

Then everyone talked
of space exploration, it

seemed we would contact
the aliens any minute

I calculated the wavelength
of the signal we would receive

I waited 15 years for the signal
from our "intelligent brothers"

From Mars?

No, Nadya, not from Mars.
After all, it does not matter at all

For 15 years I went all
across town to the institute

In the meantime - I was a
journal editor, helped the police

And waited

Watch out!

Did you wait long enough?

No, Naden'ka, I never heard a signal

I lost 15 years in vain

You and I are the only
intelligence in the universe

I understood a lifter is
much for useful for society

He earns more too

So you are not an alcoholic?

Alas

But you are still mad

I have that from childhood

Watch out!

You seem to laugh a lot

I laugh, therefore I exist

No, you laugh because you are
nervous and thinking all the time

You could get into a mad house at
this rate - you must seek distraction

Do you have hobbies?

No

How come? You do not love books?

Where can one get books?

No problem - if there is a will, a spark

A person can do anything.
Do you want to be a booklover?

I do

That is it - you are a booklover

I know a main officer in the
bookshop - we will go to him tomorrow

Do you want to see "Time-machine"?

Very much. What is it?

It is a rarity

I do not understand

Just do not stress, you will
understand everything gradually

What do they call you usually,
just the name or patronymic?

As you wish

I will just use the name

The name is good, you
are almost still young

What do your parents call you?

Nikolen'ka

Nikolai, let us go somewhere tonight.
You need cultural rest, don't you?

I'd love to but my Mum
and Dad are waiting for me

We could come in and warn them

That is difficult

Everything is difficult
with you because you are...

A pemissist... no a psesimist

What difference does it make?

None really

I do not have the money for a social life

Money does not bring happiness

An interesting thought

My own. Hold your head
higher, you are young

Everything is ahead for you

A job does not define a man.
And you need to eat more

You need to eat more so
you have the strength to fight

Rashid you are like
and artist in his workshop

Why not, Naden'ka? The
great Michaelangelo said:

How do I sculpt? I take marble
and remove everything extra

I work like that too - I take meat
and remove all the necessary

Come on, work

Marble

That is for you

Rashidik, make another
2 kilos of good meat

For who?

For the new one

No, there is no need

He is already eating with you

Lokk what progress

Rashidik, if creatures
from other stars came to

us, would you know
what to talk to them about?

Why not?

About what then? You
never finished high school

About work. I'd tell
them about my children

Let them come, we would have a good chat

The one who has no work
or children has nothing to say

I have everything

It is a shame they will never fly to us

Why not?

Because no-one exists except us

That is what a certain Comrade told me -
the most important one in flying saucers

A very interesting man

Oh, it is ok, Nikolai!

It will be heavy for you,
you are not used to it

Besides it is not a
man's job to carry bags

Nonsense. I always carry them

What is your wife for?

I do not have a wife.
My parents are elderly

We will make them happy

That bag is for your relatives

What is there?

All the rare foods. We need to
celebrate your first day at the new job

No, this is completely impossible

My dad will be furious, he
has contempt for all indulgence

He won't understand where it came from

I did not tell him I left science

I simply can't utter these words

If only you knew, how
much faith they put in me

Nikolai, I had a thought just now

I read somewhere you can
get a room if you have a library

So it is a really good hobby

And if you have a dog
they give you a room too

No, for a dog only a few square metres

Also, you should do sport

Karate. A Sensei shops with us

So no problem

You promise?

I am your slave

Never ever argue with me.
Because I know better, how it is best

The bags

Aha! The crocodile has made it

Why a crocodile?

Because of crocodile Gena in
the cartoon. You like cartoons?

Not very

I love them

My brother

He is quiet, but terribly
kind. He would kill for me

Nikolai Gavrilovich, our kind of man

Crocodile, take the
bags and open the door

Nikolai Gavrilovich, sit in the
front you will be more comfortable

What a beautiful car you have

You probably worked abroad?

Crocodile is a mechanic
in the autoservice

He has golden hands

If you want he will make
a car like that for you too

I never thought about it

You must think

We have a tragedy as usual

Regina dropped soap into the
soup, so there is nothing to eat!

Quietly, Mummy

Come in then! No need to wipe your feet!

Don't be afraid she shouts
because her throat is not well

Greetings

I have worked in a school for 40 years

I am a teacher, my name
is Tatyana Vasil'evna

Nadezhda

That is my brother, Gennady

Nice to meet you

You are renovating the flat?

No, we just moved recently

Haven't settled in yet

We are here for the
third year, we used to live

in the centre but the house
is being knocked down

No more questions

How do you treat your throat?

It is a professional
illness - untreatable!

Our department head treated hers
- it was a professional illness too

They wrote complaints about here
every day - and I treated her in a week

No problem. You will
sing, Tatyana Vasil'evna

You are just lovely, Darling!

Aha, our beauty has appeared

That is Regina, Nikolen'ka's friend

I am mad - first the soap
and now I keep thinking

Do I put the gas on first and then
light the match or the other way around?

Always like that

First I put the gas on

First the match

You need a branded Bosch stove
- you turn a switch and it lights itself

No problem

Simple, like all genious things

Regina, this is Nadezhda and Gennady

That is how I life - in constant
confict of body and soul

Although, I am not alone. Life in
general is a battle between soul and body

Do you agree?

I undestood you

For now, let us go to the kitchen

Let us put the kettle on together

Please

You must be hungry?

Let us make a pizza

I know an amazing recipe

You cut everything you have
in the house into little pieces

Put it in the oven

Only I do not think we have anything

Did you buy anything, Nikolen'ka?

Empty

Oh, great! We will eat bread and butter
like the English in Dickensian novels

Nikolen'ka, did you buy butter?

No

How do you mean - I
asked you to buy butter!

I didn't see any

I have some - no problem

Darling, you are our saviour!

Then let us sit at the table

This is terrible - you
will all hate me now

There is no bread, I ate it

Something came over me, I was daydreaming

And when I came to, it turned
out I had eaten the whole loaf

Oh you, artistic people!

You are all egoists

But we love you anyway

Inspriration needs nutrition

The poet Krilov used to eat whole geese!

Nikolen'ka- run off to the
neihbours, ask them for bread

You will scare everyone
off, shouting like that

I have some - Crocodile get it out

Forgive me for the pause

So that you can undestand
the complexity of the situation

The subtlety and issue here is...

That while living in this world we
something take evil for goodness

We sometimes accept evil as goodness

He is active, creating.
Everything in life pleases him

For him there are no questions
or problems whether in day or night

The difficulty always
has been distiguishing

good from evil
regardless of the wrapper

And telling the difference
between angel and devil

Telling the difference between
good and evil, angels and demons

Darling, where is all this from?

From a shop

You see, Nadyusha, I am
torn between teaching and my

husband, and Nikolen'ka is
absolutely no good at shopping

He grew up somewhat inactive

I do not undestand how such a pessimist
could have grown up in our family

My words precisely

This is my Dad

Yes, I am his Father

What did I always tell him? I always
told him not to delay happiness for later

What else did I always tell him?

I told him our future is
beautiful and full of light

Work for it, love it and
bring the present into it

Whatever you can bring

And there will be no problems!

Lavrik, be quiet and let people eat

I am Gavrila Maskimovich

Nice to meet you. Nadezhda

This is my brother Gennady

Nice to meet you

Nadyusha, dear, tell me -
do you work with Nikolen'ka?

In the neigbouring department

- Which one precisely?
- Gastronomical

In the astronomical?

Dad doesn't hear well

Let us not talk of it

Tanysha, we have some
drink left over from New Years

Let us go to the room

No, Regisha drank it all to cure her cold

Oh, what a shame

I have some

And no problem

A young woman who is an astronomer...

Nadyusha, are there many women?

In your department?

Oh, it is just girls

I am proud of my job

Wonderful

Then let us drink for our lovely Ladies

For your beauty and patience

For your wisdom

The thing is that everything in our fate
is connected to you one way or another

I once fell in love with a female Doctor

The thing is, I...

Oh.. what I have remembered!

What?

I think I left an iron on at home

Are you sure?

No, I turned it off, definitely

Forgive me for God's sake, Gavrila
Maksimovich, I always interfere

It's all right

Kolya, do not look at me
as though I am an enemy

Do such things not happen to you?

No

Let us move on. Listen to your father.

Once in 6 months I am
hospitalised for procedures

Connected to my body wound

Now I think I did not turn it off

What to do?

The main thing is that
the procedure is done my

the same wonderful
doctor that I am in love with

Excuse me, but if I left
it, will there be a fire?

Of course

Quiet

I am lying in the ward -
and then there is a rumour

that a delegation of Western
doctors is coming to us

They came to us too from different places

Of course - let them see

But, it is not only the doctors
who come but the journalists

Oh, that lot will write all sorts

Exactly

Should I go home?

What if I go home and all is well
there - I will never forgive myself

Of course you should
go - so you can calm down

Gena will drive you

I am just finishing

I am very embarassed,
but I will go after all

You will not be offended?

No, we will not

I will not trouble you too much?

Good-bye

Good-bye, Regina Darling

So where was I, the foreigners..

She askes everyone, who
would like to be operated

on? Everyone refuses.
Then she approaches me

The eyes, eybrows, her
gaze, her eyelashes...

The question in her
eyes - well, I am in love

Women, the devils, the feel
your passion towards them

Always!

What should I do?

It is a question of my Lady's honour

I offer myself as a candidate

Great!

Don Quixote. You are a fool, not a hero

Maybe I am a fool

The guests come

I am put on the table

The my darling stars climbing
around in my spinal chord

Spare us the details

I listen to it for the hundredth
time and it gives me goosepimples

The details God keeps, are they say

My head is full of
mist, my eyes of sparks

I may not know english but I
can see they are all impressed

I pass out, but in the
morning I wake up famous

Gavlrila Maksimovich,
let us drink to you! I

have simply fallen in
love with you, honest!

And I with you!

You, Nikolai are simply an egoist!

You have wonderful parents
and you should have done

everything to create a
great lifestyle for them

Never mind, I will make
a human being out of you

I am already almost a human being

I already want to...

Have a green car

A flat in the centre

I want to do karate -
it was my childhood

dream to break a brick
with the side of my hand

But I always thought it is not for me

But then who is it for,
I do not understand?

For who is it, if not for you?

What did you parents want
- for you to have all the best!

You are to live in the 21st century!

You are a human being of the future

No, Nadya, you know

It is you who is a person of the future

No, we are all people of
the future - let us drink to us!

For us!

I have had enough

We haven't had a nice
sit-down like that for ages!

Plus, its the "week-end"!

Let us go on a trip somewhere!

No, Garik must not

We can go to the restaraunt
"Seventh Sky". Or to Church

It is Easter tomorrow!

I've never seen the
Church Easter procession

No problem!

But the faithfull are there -
and we will just stand like tourists

But it is all right with me!

Our Head of department
shops there - a great man!

I can guess who this is

Hello?

It's me!

The iron was on!

But turns out it burnt out
ages ago - so there was no fire!

Genochka was so kind
as to repair it at once

Then he went to the
bathroom to wash his hands,

saw that there was no
light and mended the wiring

So now we will wash in the light

When it became light
he saw the tiles are

falling off, and now
he is gluing them back

They are calling us
to watch the Church

procession - but you
must be terribly tired?

I quite understand you -
we will be right there later on

Seems Crocodile and
Reginka are getting delayed

Imagine, only yesterday I
was afraid to approach you

And I was afraid to approach you

You did not pay me any attention

I did pay you attention -
but it meant nothing to you

It is interesting, why did you notice me?

I just noticed you and that's it

Maybe I remember you from childhood

From childhood? I don't quite understand

On TV

You are joking?

Girls always fall in love
with who they see on TV

Our Mother left us, Dad drank

Grandad and the crocodile brought me up

I loved them of course, but... I
wanted to love someone else too

So maybe I chose you

Later I forgot you

Now seems I have remembered you again

Maybe you and I have
already met in the past

When?

In previous lives

They wrote in the
"Technology for Youth" journal

That maybe we have
already lived other lives

And we were different people in them

Or maybe not even people, but animals

Or insects

But already met

Nadya, don't

Don't talk about it, Naden'ka

Why?

There are things we cannot judge

We do not have the right to judge them

I do have the right

I am a blood donor of the second category

You are a Darling, not a donor

Have you ever given blood?

What does blood have to do with it?

No, I never gave blood

I have allergies - my blood
is not needed by anyone

And mine is needed

In the hospital, everywhere, for everyone

I will say what I think and
you are not to shut me up

It was a stupid joke

Take that

What is this for?

Tickets for you Easter

Naden'ka, have I hurt you somehow?

What do you know about anything, what?

That's it. I am going to
Pushkino, and you can

go anywhere you want
with your ugly girlfriend

Good-bye

What Pushkino, Nadya?

I live in Pushkino, I do not
have the Moscow registration

So what? You will despise
me even more now?

You think I haven't noticed the
glances you've been giving me

I was glancing at you?

Look at you, think you are Saint Nicholas

Who are you to decide which
rights I have and do not have

Who do you take me for?

He did not like my shopping bag with food

It is not that I didn't like it...

You think I steal

I did

But you ate!

I did eat

And your elite ate too

What do I need you for, think about that!

That is what I cannot understand

I will survive without you, where
as you will be lost without me

Tanya, forgive me if I hurt you somehow

Forgive me, please

Fools steal, clever
people live on their salary

They help each other out of respect

Who have you helped in your life?

No-one

That's it. Go to her, to her!

Nadya! Forgive me!

I am a scoundrel, I had
no right to think badly of you

That's it I said - go to her!

I hate you

Where should I go?

Go to her, she is a
sophisticated young woman

I do not want to go to her

I don't want to

You wanted to for so many years
and suddenly you don't want to anymore

Scoundrel!

Nothing happened

We were simply friends

Talked

For ten years you talked

Nadya, I swear nothing happened!

We just drank tea and talked

She is a lonely person,
doesn't know how

to do anything and
is afraid of everything

I pitied her

You never pitied me once

What is there to pity you for?

She is not afraid of anything

I am the one afraid

I am afraid of you

Of me?

Who else?

I dreamt of you my whole life
and you think it's ok to mock me

I do not need anything for myself

I do not care about anything

Maybe I waited for you my whole life so
I could live and work for you, and you...

You are ashamed of me and you laugh at me

You always laughing at me

Not at all, I admire you, Nadya

Mocking me again?

I am only capable of mocking myself

Liar!

You are always lying!

When you say you are secretly
in love with me, you are also lying!

What kind of humour is that

Please don't cry

Don't touch me

I am not worthy of your tears

I promise I am not lying to you

Every morning I saw
you I thought with sadness

how there were not
such girls in my time

There could not have been, after the war

You are a child of a different era

You are too... brave, too strong

Too confident for me

And I am afraid of you

Can't you see?

I never though I would be
taken over by something like that

We are completely different
people, you understand that

But it is a fact

This morning I was parting with life

I am in love with you

No

That is impossible

It is possible

Maybe I love you too

I have nothing to gain from
you, must mean I love you

Laugh at me if you want,
call me a devil if you want

Or call me an angel

Only I am yours forever now

I am yours forever

Let us do the repairs
in the summer, not now

During the holidays

What?

We will send off the
parents for a holiday

and create a proper
interiour for them

Or better change flats now

Will we live just like
that or get registered?

You know best, how it's best

Better to get registered

Then I will have a Moscow
registration and by myself a Vyatka

What?

I can buy myself a Vyatka -
an automatic washing machine

They are only sold to Moscow citizens

Do you need time to think?

To think about what?

My dear one

Time to think before
registering the marriage

As you like

I have had time to think already

Me too

I heard they don't
register you immediately

They will - no problem

Even tomorrow

You want to do it tomorrow?

Tomorrow!

I agree

Will we have a wedding?

As you like

We ought to

For our closest relatives

We can get together at our place

Better in "Akselsiour"

Where?

It is a restaraunt, just opened

I have never been there

Crocodile will take
us, we will hire a hall

For two hundred people
or so, no more. Yes?

It will probably be very expensive...

Not for you to worry about,
I will borrow some money

I only plan to marry once in my life

Don't forget to get a
photo taken tomorrow

Why?

For tourism - we will got
on a honeymoon, won't we?

Genious!

We will put a tent up, wear trainers

Why?

Why? I will get some tickets
for a boat cruise around Africa

Spring in Africa is heaven

Do you want to go to Africa?

With you? Even to the end of the world!

Aha, Crocodile and Regina are here

Let us put our shoes on

Drops have fallen on you, Darling

It's ok, I have another
dress and suit in the car

Come on!

Who could have thought - me in Africa

A drink? Vodka, whisky, sherry?

Whisky for me, only a tiny bit

Otherwise I will start to
behave inappropriately

Nikolai, I think you wanted
to tell them something

Regina, a miracle has happened

While Nadya and I were
waiting for you, we decided to...

We already decided to go
and I started to get dressed

But the zip on my back broke

It goes from top to bottom, I am always
afraid I will be left naked in that dress

Hold you glass and let Nikolai speak

You have already noticed I
get in the way of everyones lives

Regina, Nadya and I decided...

You understand, the zip
got stuck right in the middle

Can't go up or down - a
completely inappropriate story

I sit and think,
which way to pull it - if

down then I may not
get dressed today ever

And if I pull up, it might break the zip

Genochka was waiting in the corridor

So then I decided to sew it up
and dropped a needle down my neck

Regina, let us be friends - I will
give you a new dress, a french one

Oh, could these be salty nuts?

I like you - you are not standard

Me too

You see, I would still
be sitting there and

thinking now, but Genochka
came in and saved me

You can't imagine how hard it
was for him to get that needle

Then he was so kind
as to sew me up himself

It tickled incredibly and I
laughed completely inappropriately

Genochka never even
smiled, like a true Gentleman

Reginka, can you be quiet for a moment?

You understand, when he sewed me
up I asked him, who will undo me again?

Before I go to sleep?

Then he offered me to become his wife

What do you mean he offered?

Silently

What a night

And everyone is in love

Like in Shakespear's comedy

I never thought I would
see so many religious people

They are just as religious as you and me

Then why did they come here?

What do you mean, why? It is
Easter - an ancient celebration

The meeting of spring
- we respect traditions

Hi, Nadezhda!

These are not just traditions

It is a Church

What do you think the Church is?

Explain

You do not know yourself?

I am simply interested in what you think

I think it is an open-air museum

Ancient art, architecture
and music are here

It is an ancient tradition

So people are interested

Some people go straight from the
registry office to a Church wedding

Are you ideologically not against that?

Ideologically, I am against that

Shame

Shame, we would have
looked great by the Altar

Let us get out of here

Let's go

Oh, that is who will get
us a stainless steel sink!

No, he waited for no miracles

But he was granted the
joy of suddenly falling in love

Now he will have everything

All that he dreamt and did not dream of

There will be a happy marriage

Right after which, our heroes
will enjoy material posessions

Almost all of them

What next?

What next? One can guess

They will take from life all that
it is capable of granting them

Plus (how can I best sing this bit?)

Plus a stainless steel
sink. Is there any need to list

These dreams are standard
- they will have everything

But again the question
appears - what next?

The question seems to be simple

He is someone of international
importance - how do you know him?

I met him at exhibitions, conferences

You are allowed into conferences?

There are all our people there
- writers, artists, famous actors

How do you get in there?

With Crocodile - without
him they are without wheels

It was always my dream
to be friends with artists

It never worked out

Now it will be your usual crowd

I do not think it will be interesting for
them with me, who needs a physisist loser

What do they need me for?

You think they bear my company
because I provide them with rare food

Yes

Maybe that is why you love me too?

No

Then for what?

I do not know

They do not know either - artists
are obliged to love their people

And I am the people -
as are you, Nikolen'ka

It is just that you
are not in your best

state now, but that's
ok. I will sort you out

The ununitable is
uniting - serious things

- and suddenly a
stainless steel sink

Because we have goals and dreams

Growth of material well-being

And exchange - the
house in Pushkino, plus

your flat, puls Crocodile
moves to Reginkas

Wait, wait, wait...

One, two, three, four, five

Wait!

Six people - we have the
right for a large living area

Please stop

Why?

I beg you to be quiet

You love poetry?

Yes

Read me a poem, for
example... you love poetry?

I don't know for example - " I desire
to reach the deep meaning of all"

"In work, in search for my
path in life, in affairs of the heart"

"I constantly must grab
the thread of fates, events"

"To think, to feel, to love"

To make discoveries, let us try!

Lift you head up and look up

When you see this whole
miracle - what do you think of?

I think whether we should ask to
be put in a new house or an old one

What do you think?

A new one is better

No, an old one is better - less standard

In Arbatskaya street

Is that possible?

Well, someone must
live there, why not us?

The house is emptied from inside
and a new interiour is inserted

What, a whole house?

A bungalow. Now
there is a communal flat

there, elderly people
finishing their days

We will put the elderly in
Pushkino, lots of fresh air

While we protect in historical
building, thus helping the government

We will live in a palace

I found one - a tiny
one, but with columns!

We will take you to a spiritual
healer, check your biofield

You will live forever!

Do you want to live forever, little one?

Do not call me "little one"!

I won't, I won't

But I still feel I am older than you

If there is a fire, I will carry
you out, and not you me

Naden'ka, I feel dizzy

It is ok, we will go to the sauna
now and you will come to life

To the sauna?

To the sauna!

Reginka, what is up with you?

Probably I am a masochist

I was so happy when
Gena was hitting me with

birch branches - I
felt complete liberation

Such things only happened
to me in the conservatoire

So, Nikolai

A person is happy only if he is famous

That is why you have to be famous

We will show you on TV

Yes, our supermarket is shown there often

But even better on the TV show
"The Obvious and Incredible"

You can speak in more detail
there - your Father would be happy

What do you think about that?

I think that I prefer port to vodka

I always dream of drinking port

I always dreamt of a friend like you

I suggest a toast to your silence

You know how to be silent
- it is a great and rare gift

Gena!

Repeat performance?
Or are you terribly tired?

You are my "Obvious and Incredible"

I will indroduce you to their presenter

Does he shop at yours too?

Little one, do I really
irritate you with my chatter?

No, no. I am terribly
interested in all you say

So, it is decided

We arrange your TV perfomance

About what?

About what you like?
About space creatures?

Nadya, do not talk about that

They about your current job - even better

More unusual

You will speak of your invention

But I did not invent anything

You will

You will improve tools of your trade

What is the tool of your trade?

I drag a trolley along by a wire

So... suggest replacing the wire
with a string, and four wheels with three

Overall in the country there
will be a huge economy of metal

And the radius of the turn
will be lower for the trolley

It already has three wheels

Then suggest two

It will fall

Devil take it, let it fall

Nikolai, understand.
The show is not about how

to make trolleys but
about creative response

To raise interest in art
among the wide masses

Well... agreed?

How simple it all is

After the show you
will be noticed at once

Immediately - and they will
transfer you to an intellectual job

Maybe to the institute of
even the ministry of trade

No, there will be another journal
to edit there and you will run away

To you!

Well, then, the TV plan is off

It is off. Trust me, I no
longer dream of fame

Thanks to you I feel something
unknown to me previously

One of peace in my soul

And love for life

I accept the world as it is

I have faith in the future

Today I started to also
have faith in the present

I am no longer a "psesimmist"

I am in love... oh, and drunk

Zhenechka!

Untill tomorrow

Wake up!

I am not sleepy at all

Where is everyone?

Crocodile went to take
Reginka back and return for me

I will wait for him by the house
and we will go to Pushkino

What Pushkino, you will sleep here

Quiet, everyone is asleep

I will wait for Crocodile and
leave anyway, I will not stay

Nadya!

I love you

Nikolen'ka!

I cannot

I can't stay

I am old enough to be your Grandad, Nadya

If we were just messing
around, I would have

stayed, but this way
- it would not be good

It is not good - I am surprised
you do not understand

Nikolen'ka, I cannot stay

I am not asleep, come in

Queitly, Mummy is asleep

So, how was it?

Father, I have come with Nadezhda

We have decided to get married

What about Regina?

Regina is with Gena, the Crocodile

Do you remember what I always said

Remember, what he said to you

The relations between men and
women are defined by just one measure

The measure of love

I am very glad

I had a feeling this would happen

Daddy, she wants to go to Pushkino

Yes

She will not go anywhere. She
will stay here, I can sleep on the floor

I will sleep on the floor

I am not asleep. I will be
the one sleeping on the floor!

Mother...

Well... I am getting married

Great!

Tat'yana Vasil'evna,
is your throat better?

I will just shout or whisper!

Naden'ka, I will sleep on
the floor, I want it that way

Why are we all whispering
if no-one is asleep?

And why sleep on the
floor if there is a folding bed?

Yes, there is a folding bed!

It all doesn't matter,
we are moving soon!

Did you ever think you
would live in a palace?

Never doubted it!

I am convinsed we
must all live in palaces

So no need to unpack then

Naden'ka, you will sleep in Nikolen'ka's
room and Nikolen'ka in the kitchen

Yes

Thank you very much but it is
really better that I go to Pushkino

You will not go anywhere

I am a terrible person, but
I could not stop Genochka

He saw the wallpaper
coming off and decided to tear

it down at once, so as to
put new ones up tomorrow

I am afraid it will
take him untill morning

I cannot imagine how
Nadezhda will make it home

She is staying with you?

Wonderful

What happened?

Nadya

What is wrong?

Nothing

Nothing

I simply thought...

About what?

Well... you won't understand

Maybe I will

You know, I thought...

I will marry you, we
will live together happily

We will have a boy

He will be the most beautiful,
the healthiest and the happiest

He will have everything

He will have everything -
languages, music, figure skating

Clothes too. Because
that is also very important

We will arrange a school

A special school for geniouses

He will study best of all

And then...

Then we will put him in a university

I haven't chosen which one yet

But the very very best one

Our Grandaddy will be terribly proud

I will go mad from joy

Then his whole degree course
will be sent to "practical labour"

And suddenly.. they will send a
message saying there was a fire nearby

He ran to put it out and
the roof of the house fell

There our son died heroically

You are my only one

My unique one

Such things would never
have entered my head

I imagined it all so so clearly suddenly

But I will give birth to him anyway

Honest. I will give birth
to him, won't I, little one?

Of course you will

We will dress you, do your
hair. We have a wedding tonight

Do my hair?

By tonight you will be a prince

A prince?

We will have sturgeon fish
as tall as you at the party

Which sturgeons?

Like in Ivan the Terrible's reign

Which ones?

Two metre long ones! I have a
friend who organises banquets

Our witnesses will be
Reginka and Crocodile

Dear All!

During this happy day,
at this celebratory feast

The closest and most
faithful friends are assembled

It is spring outside,
the wine is at the table

But today we are a little "Bitter"!

"Bitter"! Let them kiss!

Naden'ka, who are all these people?

Later, later

One, two, three

I have decided

Decided what?

Decided to take this step.
Genochka, I agree to be your wife

When we were in the
registry office, I was not ready

And now I am sad that we have
not registered our relationship

No problem. Crocodile, quickly go to the
registry office. One foot here, one there

What is up with you?

Smile

Smile to the guests

Who are these people?

These are my very very
closest friends, and now yours too

Come on, I will introduce you to everyone

Meet Valentina Petrovna

Railway tickets

My pleasure

Please. Vladimir Arkad'evich

Flat renovations

Nikolai!

Pleased to meet you

Come here!

Dzhul'etta Sumakovna

Black sea coastline

This way

Stella

Complete works of famous authors

Nikolai Gavrilovich

The main one on flying saucers

Meet Palich

Always a pleasure

Theatre tickets

The main one on flying saucers

Nikolen'ka!

Please meet

Sex therapist

Who?

A sex therapist!

Let us get out of here

Well.. what's wrong?

Nikolen'ka, what happened?

Tell me

What is it, don't be like that?

Look how much fun everyone is having

Look how well everything is, Nikolai?

Have so food, be happy

What is it?

Aha, here is our head of deliveries at
the supermarket, Comrade Ogurtsov

Why is he dressed like that, is he mad?

Come on, let's meet him!

He is with us, excuse me!

Just a minute. Nikolai, I
think you can be congratulated

Thank you very much, we
are very glad you have come

But why are you without a tie?

That is why you were not allowed in

Just a minute

An hour ago I was called
at my country-house

Nikolai, can you imagine
what has happened?

Yes. I got married

So, you do not know anything?

For the first time, a
stable rhythmic signal has

been observed at your
predicted wavelength range

It's for luck!

Most likely... excuse me.. most
likely, it is a coincidence, but...

There is a possibility

It is a signal from
extra-terrestial creatures!

On the day of our wedding, my little one!

I think it is all very undefined so far

But some hope has appeared

Our brothers in intelligence. My
little one, I was not mistaken in you

You are a genious!

It is more likely a "no" than a "yes"

But possibly...

"Yes", rather than "no"

Yes, yes! I am sure it is a "yes"!

This smells of a Nobel prize

Wait

Is there a recording?>

Unfortunately there is no clear recording

You, my dear, deserted us to
be a lifter in a supermarket, and

the girl who replaced you could
not cope with the equipment

So the moment is
lost, we will have to wait

To wait how long?

Shut up

Nikolen'ka, I am your wife and
there are things I know better than you

Now there is a hint that a signal
has been received since you left work

And you are standing and
flapping your ears, why?

Comrade Ogurtsov, were are old friends

I do not understand what you mean, Dear

We've known each other a
hundred years, or have you forgotten?

Oh yes

You help me get hold
of some caviar one time

So we will got to Switzerland to
receive the prize all together, won't we?

Go to the guests, I beg you

Of course, Dear. But we have a
long way to go untill the Nobel prize

There is some work which has to be done

How much?

Maybe a whole life will be needed for it

Maybe ten lives

Can't it be speeded up somehow?
Maybe I need to get hold of something?

Naden'ka, you get hold of salami sausage!

A radiotelescope

I will think

Pay no attention

You wife is lovely

But the nearest free radiotelescope
is beyond the Arctic Circle

The conditions are very tough and
you will not want to go there from Moscow

I am ready to travel anywhere

Right this second

My friends!

A moment of your attention!

Just now, a grandiose
event has taken place!

My husband, Nikolai Gavrilovich Porivaev

The head of Space

Heard the voice of our
intelligent brothers in outer space!

We are not alone in the
universe - there are many like us!

Hurray!

Swing him! Follow me!

Don't touch me! You have no right!

Leave me alone!

Put me back!

What are you doing?

Let me go!

Let him go!

Don't touch me!

Nikolen'ka!

Nikolen'ka, a terrible
thing has happened!

Everyone dance!

No, this is terrible

Yesterday, I broke the phone. This
time I smashed it into little pieces

Genochka brought a new one,
with buttons instead of a disk

Now the police have come, saying
he stole this phone from his workplace

The wheels for the roof
he took from some garage

Other things are
stolen from an exhibition

Now he will be taken to court

It's ok. A person made a mistake

We will call the head judge, he
will get two years on probation

Regina, Nikolai, that
is not the main thing.

The main thing is
that we are not alone!

Somewhere out there, on other
stars, other people like us live!

People of the future!

What nonsense are you talking!

You said so yourself!

I was joking

It is true, Nikolen'ka, that is how it is

We have a future, you,
me, Regina. You have

everything now, and we
will buy what you don't have

What are you saying! What future?

Come here!

Just look at him!

He is the future, yes?

This one is also the future?

No, just you look at them!

Kolya!

Nikolai, where are you going?

What happened, Kolya?

Tell me!

Look at me!

Don't be like that, Kolechka

I don't understand!

I did not understand
what happened, Kolya!

Kolya, where are you going, stop!

My good one, where are you going?

Kolya, Kolechka, where are you running?

What did I do?

What did I do wrong, Kolya?

I wanted as it is better, Darling

I tried so hard for you

Look at me - do you want
me to fulfill all your wishes?

Like the golden fish in the fairy tale?

Kolechka, do not run away from me?

I can't be without you, Darling, really!

Really, I cannot be without you

Kolechka, stop, please

Oh, do not spend your life in vain

On worthless details

People love, and suffer,
and look into the sky at night

Do not allow yourself to
burn up in unworthy issues

For your soul to stay young,
look at the stars more often

For your soul to stay young,
look at stars more often

So as not to waste strength

And not to betray yourself

You must undestand
what it is you live for

Do not allow yourself to
burn up for unreal dreams

For your soul to stay young,
look at the stars more often

However... what am I doing?

The story is not yet over

Explain yourself slower, let
me catch up and restrain you

You will not be able to hide from
love or run away from yourself

The road into the distance
is as far as life itself

Wherever you escape
to - love is calling you

And there is the possibility of happiness

Here is love, it calls,
and happiness is possible

Don't dissappear without trace suddenly

Don't melt away into the distance

Do not run away to
the edge of the universe

Do not circle the planet

The path into the distance is as long as
life itself no matter how faraway you run

But here is love, it calls
and happiness is possible

The End. Film studio "Lenfil'm" 1984