Batman Ninja (2018) - full transcript

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(BATS SCREECHING)

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(THUNDERCLAP)

CATWOMAN: You think you've
heard every Batman story.

I promise, you haven't.

I wouldn't have
believed it myself

if I hadn't seen it
with my own eyes.

And this time, curiosity
almost killed this cat.

BATMAN: Shut it down, Grodd.
It's over. You're finished!

GORILLA GRODD:
No, I'm too close.



You will not interfere with my
experiment this time, Batman.

(GROWLS)

Catwoman, don't!

(PANTING)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

BATMAN: What?

Where am I?
What happened?

(EXCLAIMS)

Hmm?

It's Japanese.
And that's me.

(APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS)

SAMURAI: There he is,
get him!



Samurai?

Stop! Listen to me, I don't
want to hurt any of you.

Fine, have it
your way.

Explain yourself.

We were sent to find the man
dressed as a bat.

Our master has ordered us
to kill him on sight.

He cannot be allowed to live.

Who's your master?

(HORSES NEIGHING)

(OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

None of this makes any sense.

Everything's offline.

But from the look of it,
this is ancient Japan.

Which doesn't explain
what's going on up there.

BATMAN: What?

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

- The Joker?
- So soon?

That's right, Bats.

(WHISPERS) It is I.

Damn you!

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Hi.

And Harley Quinn.

Oh, but you
have to admit,

we really had you
going there, didn't we?

That's enough. What are you
playing at this time, Joker?

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Haven't you heard?
Everyone's been calling me

Diruku Tin Mao,
The Demon King.

The most powerful
man in Japan.

But you can call me...

Lord Joker.

Oh, I never really
wanted to be a Lord.

It wasn't what you would
call an aspiration.

But when life throws
you time travels,

sometimes you gotta make travelade.
(LAUGHS)

Guess I have that monkey
to thank for this.

If it wasn't for
his stupid machine

- this tiny island would have never been on my itinerary.
- (GRUMBLES)

I have to say I've really
enjoyed the sushi here.

Mwah. It's even better
with some sauce.

(JOKER LAUGHS EXULTANTLY)

(JOKER GROANS)

(GROANS)

Is it me, or is it
getting hot in here?

Oh, don't run away.
I'm your biggest fan.

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Oh, now, now, Batman, don't
you want to play anymore?

Oh, now look what you've done.

Poison Ivy would be
very disappointed.

Mmm.

Don't you know how bad razor-edged
fighting fans are for the environment?

You're the one who
keeps throwing them.

Because you won't
let them hit you.

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Looks like you're
fresh out of those fans.

So what are you
going to do now, Joker?

- Oh, I've got options, Bats.
- (LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

I've still
got Harley,

- and an army of Samurai who have you surrounded.
- (SNAPS FINGER)

BATMAN: Seven to one,
I'll take those odds.

(MUFFLED CUNNING LAUGHTER)

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

Should we go
after him, Lord J?

I've got people.

Let's just enjoy
the moonlight.

(EXCLAIMS SATISFACTORILY)

We have all the time
in the world.

SHOGUN: Move, move.
He can't be far.

- (MEOWING)
- Huh?

(MEOWING)

Don't be afraid.

It's just a little catcall.

Catwoman?

CATWOMAN: When I saw the
Joker's samurai on the move,

I figured
something was up.

I'm glad
it was you.

How did you
get here?

Same as you.
Gorilla Grodd's time machine.

That was
two years ago.

How is that
even possible?

I downloaded these before the time jump.
Maybe they can help.

JOKER: Say what's
your business, monkey.

PENGUIN: Why have you
brought us here?

GORILLA GRODD: Criminals of Gotham
City, I've gathered you here

to unveil
my greatest invention.

NIGHTWING: Red Hood,
this is Nightwing.

The lead paid off. It's like
a criminal convention here.

RED HOOD: Yeah, I can see them
from here too.

ALFRED: Well, the Mayor's
party's tonight.

I wasn't alone.

They were all there too.

Nightwing, Red Hood,

Red Robin, and Robin.

So where are they?

I don't know.

I haven't seen
any of them.

But since arriving, Gotham's criminals
have run wild all over Japan.

GORILLA GRODD:
Behold, The Quake Engine.

Now, witness as I become
master of time and space,

and bend them to my will.

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

CATWOMAN: There are
no more images.

The rest are
just audio files.

BATMAN: Grodd's machine must
have affected the data transfer.

JOKER: Now it's all
upside down.

I think that monkey has been
mucking with our heads.

GORILLA GRODD: You will not interfere
with my experiment this time, Bat...

So the Joker is just the unwitting
beneficiary of Grodd's experiment.

Well, no one ever said
he didn't thrive in chaos.

BATMAN: But we were there
at the same time,

why the two year difference?

CATWOMAN: Who knows how
time travel works?

Grodd delayed me, and it
must have affected the jump.

A matter of seconds then,
turned to be two years now.

Selena, may I ask what were
you doing there that night?

I can tell you I never thought
I'd end up here.

I followed Gorilla Grodd to Arkham
to see what he was up to that night.

If it was any good, I was
planning on stealing it.

And the criminals?

Like the Joker,
they've taken over.

They've deceived
all the Sengoku Daimyos

and become
lords of their states.

Sengoku Daimyo?

That's right.

This period in Japan was a
feudal era of warring states.

CATWOMAN: Yes. Each of Gotham's criminals
is trying to conquer and unify Japan.

The Penguin has seized control
of the state of Kai.

He skirmishes repeatedly with the
neighboring state of Echigo,

where Poison Ivy rules.

(PENGUIN LAUGHING CUNNINGLY)

PENGUIN: Fly,
my fine-feathered friends.

POISON IVY: I'll bury you in
the dirt, you old buzzard.

CATWOMAN: In the state of Nutsu,
Deathstroke reigns supreme.

DEATHSTROKE:
Once my fortress is complete,

it'll be my turn
to strike. Yeah.

CATWOMAN: Two-Face has taken
control in the state of Omie.

Near the capital.

He has become
a vassal of the Joker.

TWO-FACE: Let's see, what will
my next move be?

CATWOMAN: But right now, the feudal
lord who is closest to unifying Japan

is the Joker.

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(HARLEY QUINN
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

BATMAN: So they're all trying to takeover
this country and rewrite history.

We have to find Gorilla Grodd.
Have you seen him?

Not recently.

Why don't you and I
join forces, Bruce?

Join forces?

I want to go home. Two years
is a long time to be away.

Okay. But
no tricks, Selena.

Swear.

We just have to
get into that tower.

Joker keeps Grodd's
time machine in there.

This missionary look
is not bad.

There were quite a lot of Christian missionaries
that came to Japan during this era.

This way you won't look
too suspicious as a westerner.

The bat tonsure
is a nice touch.

BATMAN: Thanks.

So, why did you
bring me here?

CATWOMAN: I wanted
you to see this.

The Joker is up to
something strange.

BATMAN: Is that coal?

So the Joker is
already changing the timeline.

The industrial revolution
wasn't until much later.

I really doubt the Joker
cares much about history.

My guess is whatever
he's doing,

he'll use it
to become Shogun.

But it's not
just the Joker.

We'll have to defeat all of
Gotham's criminals to save history.

We'll need weapons
for that.

If only there were
someone who could help us.

Care for
some tea, sir?

Ah, much appreciated.

Oh, is this is black tea?

Hard to come by in these
neck of the woods.

Hope you find it
to your liking.

Alfred.

It was Ms. Selena's idea.
I do apologize.

ALFRED: It's a bit more rustic
than you're accustomed to.

But I think it makes for
a suitable bat cave.

What?

I can't believe
you didn't tell me, Selena.

I know, but I wanted to see the
look of surprise on your face.

There's no need
to worry.

The vehicle's been well
maintained, Master Bruce.

But I don't understand.

Alfred was in
the Batmobile that night.

We were lucky enough
to find each other here.

And we both figured it was only a
matter of time before you arrived.

And here I am.

Well, I think the Joker would be
quite shocked to see you in it.

Yeah, let's hope.

Well, I must confess

that I'm quite relieved Ms. Selena
found you in the forest, Master Bruce.

I, for one, have always wanted
to visit this beautiful country,

but I'd much prefer to
do so in my own time.

Although, I must admit, I've picked
up quite a few new culinary ideas.

And there's a fish I rather
fancy, made with miso.

(BOTH GIGGLE)

I see you haven't changed
at all, old friend.

I can't wait to taste this fish
dish you've been talking about.

Didn't mean to brag, sir,
but it is quite good.

I'm sure it is.

Get down!

Fire!

A direct hit!
We got him.

- Huh? What is that?
- Bail out.

I'm going
after the Joker.

Selena, take care
of Alfred for me.

You got it.

(PANTING)

Batman's comin'!

- What's that?
- Batman's here

in his Batmobile!

Take aim! Fire!

HARLEY QUINN: He's beaten
the gunmen and our cannons.

And he's
rapidly approaching

as this fun
puppet show demonstrates.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

He's nothing without
his stupid Batmobile.

Which gives me
an interesting idea.

Nice try.

Oh, Batman. The old
magnetized bumper trick.

Always so clever
with your technology.

Harley, activate
Arkham Castle!

But, puddin', the castle
isn't even finished yet.

But this is
the Batman!

He's the reason we made
it in the first place.

Right.

(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

Get ready, Joker.

(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING
IN ASTONISHMENT)

What the hell
is that?

This is madness.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

JOKER: How about a pitcher?
Not a belly itcher.

Now we need a batter,
not a broken ladder.

Swing batter.

Incoming.

Now, it's my turn.

BATMAN: I'm coming for you.

Ooh, storming the gate.

JOKER: Let me give you
a helping hand.

Now I'll crush your favorite
toy with you inside it.

Not today.

(JOKER EXCLAIMING)

Very persistent,
my old friend.

BATMAN: Locked on target.

JOKER: You know what
I like best about you?

You're so predictable.

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Bat on a stick, one of
my favorite delicacies.

Not so fast.

It's over, Joker.
You're through.

No, I don't think you have
that completely right.

Hmm?

(JOKER LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

How terrible!

You can come after me, or save
that mother and child down below.

Your move, Bats!

No!

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(BANE GRUNTING)

Bane? How did you...

(BANE GRUNTING)

(BANE GRUNTS)

BATMAN: This isn't
your fight!

Go! Hurry!

Need more power.

- (BEEPING)
- Wait! No!

Get moving,
I'll hold them off.

Hold this!

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Poor Bats. He always
falls for the same tricks.

Oh, it makes me sad
he's so dumb.

He's always risking his life
to save ordinary people.

If you had just let them die
and gone after me instead,

maybe you wouldn't find yourself
in such terrible shape.

I have no regrets.

Well, what shall
we do now?

Are you just
going to lie there,

or are you going to
entertain me some more?

I'm not here for
your entertainment.

Ah, wrong again.

Now that all your toys
are busted

you better start thinking what
you're going to do for a second act.

Oh, if only your friends were
around to come by and say hi.

Uh, puddin', look!

Huh?

(BOTH SCREAM)

I didn't mean it!
I was being sarcastic!

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

HARLEY QUINN:
What? Ninja Batmen?

We got you. (WHISTLES)

Huh?

(EXCLAIMS QUIZZICALLY)

BATMAN: Nightwing, Red Robin,

who else made the time jump?

Red Hood
and Robin, too.

But Red Hood is away
on a recon mission

to find out what's happening
in the other feudal states.

Alfred and Catwoman?

Don't worry.

Robin has already
gone after them.

They should be
here shortly.

And him?

Batman, this
is Aeon.

He was a great help to us
after we arrived here.

He's the leader of
the ninja clan.

BATMAN: Ninja clan?

We are the Bat clan
of Hida.

Our lives are guided by
an ancient prophecy.

Legend foretells that
when the country is in chaos

a foreign ninja wearing
the mask of a bat will come

and restore order to our land.

Bat clan, we have waited
all our lives for this moment.

Serve this shinobi
with your life.

This is the hour
of our destiny.

Now, we finally look upon you,

great shinobi from
across the sea of time.

Lord Batman.

Hmm.

(NINJAS GRUNTING)

Looks like
a nice place.

Yes, but for
how long.

The Batmobile,
the Batwing, the Batcycle

they've all been destroyed
at the hands of the Joker.

How do we regain the advantage
when we have nothing?

Batman.

Monkichi has
a message for you.

Monkichi?

It's weird, but Robin's
made friends with this monkey.

He's really
pretty smart.

And he understands
everything I say.

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)

BATMAN: What is it?

He says he got it from
someone in the mountain.

CATWOMAN: It's in English.

It's Grodd.

(FLUTE PLAYING)

(SIGHS SATISFACTORILY)

Oh, that feels good.

What is it about
apes and humans

that we always sigh when we
relax in a hot bath, Batman?

You might as well
enjoy the waters, too.

No, I'm good right here.

I never would have taken
you for the shy type,

but then again you are always
hiding behind the mask.

Are you sure you don't
want to reconsider?

(SLURPING)

BATMAN: I'm guessing
you didn't invite me here

just to join you
for a hot soak.

GORILLA GRODD: Such impatience.

BATMAN: Well, what did
you expect?

We're only in this mess
because of you, Grodd.

Why did you invent that time
machine in the first place?

That's like asking why this
ancient Gorilla crossed the road.

Because I could.

The criminals of Gotham
were my guinea pigs.

I was going to send them some place far
away, so I could take over Gotham myself.

And I would've succeeded.

The Quake Engine was
my greatest invention.

But your interference brought
us to this time and place.

BATMAN: How's that?

GORILLA GRODD: We are both responsible
for what transpired that night.

And we will need to
cooperate to get home.

What do
you say, Batman?

I'll be the bait.

It's the best way
to draw out the Joker.

GORILLA GRODD:
Hmm. Intriguing.

(FLUTE PLAYING)

Well, it's been a while,
my dear Gorilla Grodd.

Looks like this place
agrees with you.

Hmm. Well well, I know
this isn't just a social visit.

Where's Batman?

Clearly you've no time for pleasantries
now that you've set on conquest.

Ooh, is it that obvious?
It's the outfit, isn't it?

Kinda gives it away.

Imagine this entire country
in total chaos.

A land full of
needless suffering and pain.

It's very interesting
that of all humans,

you're the one who wound up
with the Quake Engine.

JOKER: Oh, I'm tired of
all this chit-chat, Grodd.

I told you I'd spare your life
in exchange for the Batman.

So where is he?

Huh?

Right here.

(JOKER AND HARLEY QUINN
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

We have you
surrounded, Joker.

(LAUGHING)

You sure do.

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Catch!

No!

Well, duh!
What do you take us for?

We knew you'd have men
hiding in the water.

It's a shame
they all had to die.

So why don't
you join them?

Maybe another time.

You're still doomed.
(LAUGHS)

You underestimate
your opponent, Joker.

Just like you
always do.

But how?
We killed you.

Ever heard of a decoy?

(HARLEY QUINN
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Oh.

Sheesh. I never figured you'd
side with Batman, Gorilla Grodd.

Anything to gain
the advantage.

(JOKER EXCLAIMING)

(GROWLING)

(GROANING)

I never thought
you'd need help

from a talking monkey
to catch me.

I'm so embarrassed
for you, Batman.

Don't be. I'm happy
to disappoint.

Oh, I'd be careful. If he turned
on me, he'll turn on you.

(MUFFLED SPEAKING)

I'm so grateful we were
able to trust each other.

Many thanks.

But in this world,
trust means nothing.

Now you will
submit to my control.

Bat clan,
destroy them all.

We cannot be shaken
by your evil thoughts.

We have mastery over our
bodies and our minds.

So you do.

Then prepare
to be annihilated.

(EXCLAIMING QUIZZICALLY)

Over there!

RED ROBIN: Two-face.

You and Two-Face have
teamed up, Gorilla Grodd?

That's right,
Red Robin.

Don't you know Gorilla Grodd
is always two steps ahead?

No!

And to what do I owe this
unexpected visit, Catwoman?

Oh, I thought you might
want this thingy.

Now where did
you get that?

I lifted it from Harley
Quinn during our fight.

It's part of your
fancy quake machine, isn't it?

And what do you
want in return?

Take me back
to the future.

(SNICKERS) It's a deal.

I thought we could
do business.

BATMAN: We have to
abandon ship.

Now!

Joker?

Looking for me, Bats?

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Don't do it, Joker.

We need to go! She can't
stay afloat much longer.

Take the others, go!

What about you?

I'm staying. He's
not getting away.

Oh, I'm really
flattered, Batman.

We really don't spend
enough time together.

We're just so busy.

To be honest, if Two-Face had killed
you, I'd never forgive myself.

I deserve to
kill the Batman.

I'm the Joker.

You're insane.
You'll kill yourself.

Ugh! That's what
I've been trying

to tell you,
you stupid bat.

I'm having a party,
in hell!

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

BATMAN: Joker, no!

No!

Hmm. And so it ends.

(BATS FLUTTERING)

(MUFFLED LAUGHTER)

Hmm.

(SMIRKS)

Hmm.

Mmm.

The renovations are
almost complete.

Contact the other daimyos.

The battle will be at
Jigokukohara, the field of hell.

We'll see
who'll be shogun.

CATWOMAN: And when will
we be going home?

Now, soon enough.

We still need to obtain three
remaining power converters

from Penguin, Poison Ivy,
and Deathstroke.

Then the Quake Engine will be complete
and we can move through time and space.

Excuse me, do you mind
stepping aside?

Isn't eating a banana
a little cliche?

Says the cat burglar
in the cat costume.

We're relieved you're
with us, Master Bruce.

How long have
I been out?

Two whole days, sir.

I see.

Well, what is this?

Aeon brought it by, sir.

He said the legendary mask
of the Bat clan

should be worn by
its rightful owner.

(RAIN PATTERING)

I had nothing.

No vehicles
or weapons.

I didn't know
who I was anymore.

Who was Batman, stripped
of all his technology?

In my desperation, I
joined forces with Grodd.

So many lost and injured
because I was blind

to Grodd's betrayal,
but ultimately to myself.

And yet they still insist
on calling me Master.

So what are
you gonna do?

Just hang it up?

What I always do,
I'm going to fight.

I was wrong.

I thought
I had nothing.

But I have more
than I thought.

I have my mind,
my body, my spirit...

and all of you.

That's more
than enough.

This time and place
has its own rules.

And if we're going to win,
it's time we played by them.

I swear

their faith in me
will not be squandered.

We will master
the ways of the ninja.

Our weapons will be
everything that exists.

And I will turn
their legend

into reality.

NIGHTWING: The techniques of the
ninja are extremely effective.

If we can combine
their martial arts skills

with modern innovations
and combat,

Grodd won't know what hit him.

If they attack us with their mobile
fortress, we will out-maneuver them

and strike back with
everything we've got.

BATMAN: Will it work?

RED ROBIN: The craftsmanship of the
ninja blacksmiths is incredible.

The precision of their weapons can't be
matched even by our 21st century standards.

(DOGS BARKING)

ALFRED: The wild game and
produce here are exceptional.

I'm planning
a high protein diet.

Perhaps some boar steak
for dinner tonight, sir?

BATMAN: Sounds good, Alfred.

ALFRED: When the wheat is ready for harvest,
we can make some freshly baked bread.

- (BATMAN CHUCKLES)
- Well, you know what they say,

wars are won on full stomachs.

- BATMAN: Good thinking.
- ROBIN: Hey!

Batman, Monkichi
has another message.

BATMAN: Has Red Hood
found them?

- ROBIN: Yes.
- BATMAN: I'm on my way.

(PANTING)

RED HOOD: Excuse me.

May I have
a cup of water, please?

MAN: Ah, yes, of course.

WOMAN: Oh,
you must be exhausted.

It's a rather hot day for a
Buddhist monk to be traveling.

(WOMAN SCREAMING)

I'll break it.

(RED HOOD GRUNTS)

Stop! Please stop!

RED HOOD: If you don't show
your face, I'll break her arm.

Okay, okay, okay.

RED HOOD: I knew
you were alive, Joker.

They said you were dead,
but I didn't believe it.

So I've been
looking for you.

Joker?

Why do you keep insisting
on calling me that?

Admit it! (GRUNTS)

MAN: No! No! My darling!

No, no, are you insane?

You think
I'm that stupid?

Do you expect me
to believe

the Joker has
taken up farming?

WOMAN: Honey?

You too!
Harley Quinn!

MAN: Oh, my love.
Oh, my love.

I owe you this.

MAN: Please forgive us.
Please. Please.

(GRUNTING)

(RED HOOD EXCLAIMS)

- (RED HOOD EXCLAIMS)
- (MAN WHIMPERING)

MAN: I don't understand.

I'm not
who you think I am.

If you're still
going to deny it...

(PANTING)

BATMAN: Red Hood, stop it!

RED HOOD: Batman, what
are you doing here?

BATMAN: Same as you.

I heard that you had found
the Joker and Harley.

Reports of foreign farmers in the
area match their description.

BATMAN: So, you don't
remember anything?

MAN: No.

We can't remember
anything about our past.

We came here to live a peaceful
life, deep in the mountains.

My wife and I, we plough
the fields together.

BATMAN: I see.

RED HOOD: Don't let
'em fool you, Batman.

They're up to their
same old tricks.

I'm not so sure,
Red Hood.

BATMAN: I'm sorry
for my friend's behavior.

MAN: When I work the land,
I feel like I'm being cleansed.

It's as if everything bad
inside me is being sucked out

and absorbed back
into the earth.

I know it sounds silly, but my
wife and I are always saying

it's like
we've been reborn.

WOMAN: Honey, quick!
Come, look!

There's a sprout.
You have to see this.

New life...

MAN: A sprout,
are you kidding?

BATMAN: Enough!

This is different. I've been
tricked by them before.

There isn't the same
madness in his eyes.

If you knew him like I did, you'd know he
could never hide that part of himself.

It's what makes him what he is.

(HARLEY QUINN AND JOKER
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(BOTH EXCLAIMING EXCITEDLY)

Oh, honey.

(BOTH EXCLAIMING IN HAPPINESS)

WOMAN: We did it.
They're finally growing.

Bruce...

He's not the Joker.
At least, not anymore.

They both lost their
memories in the explosion.

There's no need
to bother them.

You can't
be serious.

We'll take them
back with us

once the Quake Engine
is operational again.

But, for now we'll just
keep an eye on them.

They're not
going to hurt anyone.

(GRUMBLES)

Come on,
Red Hood, let's go.

I hope
you're right.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Construction's complete.

The time has arrived to destroy these
upstarts and rebuild the Quake Engine.

Arkham Castle, rise!

(MEN SCREAM)

(ALL GASP)

(BARKING)

(WHIMPERS)

PENGUIN: That malicious monkey
is finally on the move.

Let's take what's ours and
feather this nest we've built.

Fly! Trojan Birdman Castle.

Spread your wings!

POISON IVY: I will not let
this paradise be destroyed

by the machinations of men.

Juroku Plant Poison Castle.

Grow. And let them reap
what we have sown.

DEATHSTROKE: Interesting.

Now we'll finally see who's the
most powerful warlord in Japan.

Gakuju Sharaso Castle will blow
you all to kingdom come.

Fire!

TWO-FACE: From order to chaos.
All in the flip of a coin.

The enemy converges
at the field of hell.

Fudo Omote Two-Face castle will meet
them, and decide the fate of Japan.

(TEACUP SHAKING)

A fine tea, Alfred.

My pleasure.

All of the daimyo castles
are on the move.

This is our chance.

I can't wait to
slaughter them all.

Then it will truly earn the
name "The field of hell."

But what matters is

the converters and the Quake
Engine will all be in one place.

BATMAN: This is it.

This is our
one opportunity

to defeat them
and return to Gotham.

Remember, the machines,
no matter how large,

are still controlled
by humans.

If we can defeat the person
inside the machine,

then we have
a fighting chance.

Aeon was right.

I now understand the role
I must play.

I am not longer the Batman.

I will be what the Bat clan
calls me.

I will be their prophecy.

I will be the legendary ninja who
will bring peace to their land.

I will be...

SHOGUN: Fire!

(PENGUIN LAUGHING)

This Penguin moves as swiftly
on land as it does at sea!

And it's got
one hell of a bite.

Watch it, you bloated bird,
'cause this plant bites back.

And I'm going to catch you
in this flytrap.

(PENGUIN LAUGHS)

PENGUIN: Trojan Birdman Castle,

wind forest fire
mountain transformation.

Two can play
at this game.

Juroku Plant Poison Castle,

multitudes of
flowers transformation.

Bullseye.

Gakuju Sharaso Castle,

rapid fire
hundred cannons transformation.

Fire!

(DEATHSTROKE LAUGHS)

Not too bad.

Hmph.

Hmm?

Gorilla Grodd,
leave him to me.

Fudo Omote Two-Face Castle,

two-faced transformation!

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)

Look! Over there.

Giant robots?

Batman, what now?

AEON: Master, leave them to us.

BATMAN: Give 'em hell!

RED HOOD: Behind us.

We're stuck between a rock
and a hard place.

Come on.

(HORSE WHINNIES)

Yeah.

I appreciate your
loyalty, Two-Face.

Sure. Until the coin
tells me otherwise.

Tails, I stay.
Heads, I go.

Your luck's run out.

I'm gonna rip you
limb from limb, Grodd.

It's easy to understand
the laws of probability.

(SNICKERS)

It was only
a matter of time.

Let's go!

Head straight for
Arkham Castle!

(GROWLING)

Look out!

(METAL CLANGS)

Well, that was cool.

(GRODD EXCLAIMS)

(BOTH SCREAMING)

GORILLA GRODD: That's
enough games for now.

It's time to
get down to business.

(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

(EXCLAIMS CUNNINGLY)

(GRUNTS MALICIOUSLY)

What are you doing now?

All of Gotham's criminals
are now under my mind control.

What they do not know

is that I actually manipulated them
into building their fortresses, too.

Where do you think
they got the technology?

They are just pieces
in a larger puzzle.

Like the feudal states
of Japan herself.

Whatever it takes
to get home.

Sorry to break it
to you...

but you're not going anywhere.

I'm going to rule
this country

and turn it into
a kingdom of monkeys,

and rewrite the history
of the world!

(JOKER'S RECORDED LAUGHTER)

(COUGHS)

What is...

(GRUNTS)

(HARLEY QUINN AND JOKER
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

We're back!

I love giving presents.

Out with the old
and in with the new.

HARLEY QUINN:
No exchanges or returns.

(HARLEY LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Joker?

It can't be.

Hi, Bats.

You should know by now that you
can't keep a crazy man down.

You never want to be
too early to a party.

Right?

(LAUGHS)

Hi, pretty kitty.

You really took us by surprise
back at the lake, Grodd.

But now it's time
for a little payback.

The paralysis isn't permanent, but we're
thinking about increasing the dosage.

Ivy's got the best plants,
don't you think?

Bastard.

Now, now, now,

don't go
and strain yourself.

Not that you
can move anyway.

HARLEY QUINN:
You too, kitty cat.

Now, in a dramatic turn of events,
the Joker takes over Grodd's plan.

Sayonara!

Batman!

(BOTH SCREAMING)

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

It's so tough being a hero.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(COUGHS)

Are both of you all right?

Don't think I didn't notice you
saving Grodd before me.

But, thank you, Batman.

I see that gas didn't
knock out your attitude.

I'm glad you're
still with us, Catwoman.

So what now, puddin'? It looks like this
thing is still plugged into their brains.

Well, that means it's time
to play a few mind games.

Criminals of Gotham,

become one!

(UPTEMPO JAPANESE SONG PLAYING)

ALL: Five unite and serve
as six heavenly beings.

Lord Joker!

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Whoa! That thing's enormous.

This contraption is better than
I ever imagined, Gorilla Grodd.

This country really
will belong the Joker.

Now let's see.

What sort of chaos the
super robot can unleash.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

ROBIN: Hurry, get out of here.

(ALL GRUNTING)

(SCREAMS)

Robin, get...

Robin!

(GROANING)

ROBIN: Gorilla Grodd?

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

JOKER: Ooh, that was easy.
Now what?

(YAWNING)

Guess I could use a nap.

So what now?

He's hurt
pretty bad.

(GROANING)

Here.

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS)

You can use this.

It controls my
army of monkeys.

Use them to
defeat the Joker.

I owe you
for saving my life.

I promise,
no tricks this time.

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS
IN EXCITEMENT)

Batman, lend us
the flute, please?

Monkichi and I know exactly
what to do.

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS)

(SNORING)

(YAWNING)

(JOKER EXCLAIMS IN ASTONISHMENT)

What?

Monkeys?

(ROBIN AND MONKICHI
PLAYING FLUTE)

There's millions.

(JOKER EXCLAIMING)

I can feel them. They're
crawling all over me.

Get off! Get off!

They can't hang on.

(MONKEY EXCLAIMING)

ROBIN: Monmi.

- Who's she?
- (MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)

You got it.

So annoying!

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(PLAYING INTENSIFIES)

ROBIN: (EXCLAIMS) If the bad guys are
going to unite, then so will we.

Enough monking around!

I'll blow you to pieces.

ROBIN: All for one
and one for all.

Their combined spirit
has formed this giant samurai.

Now, witness the awesome
power of the monkeys.

Together, they will deliver
a devastating blow!

(JOKER GROANING)

Unexpected.

Let's move!

Storm the robot
while it's down.

- ALL: Right!
- ROBIN: Monkichi,

I'm leaving
the flute with you.

(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS
IN ACCEPTANCE)

Bruce, I'm going
with you.

Harley Quinn could use
a good ass kicking.

Come on.

Got to love a man who can forgive
a girl for double-crossing him.

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Monkey see monkey do.

JOKER: It's not how you fall, but how
you pick yourself up that counts.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

All right.

Looks like more
monkey business.

Harley, we have guests!

(HARLEY EXCLAIMS GLEEFULLY)

Why don't you greet them
with a warm kiss?

Sure!

Get down!

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

- Robin.
- No!

Master, at your service.

What, again? I hate bats!

Go, go, go! Shoo, shoo! Get
out of here, you stupid bats!

Go!

Huh?

(STUTTERING) Batman?

(EVERYONE GASPING)

Behold, the mighty Batgod
before us.

Batman! Harley?

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Burn on the field of hell!

(EVERYONE GASPS)

We're coming for you.

(BOTH ROARING)

(GRUNTS LOUDLY)

(JOKER GROANING)

Time to settle this...

once and for all.

(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)

NIGHTWING:
Party's over, Penguin.

RED HOOD:
Tell you what, Deathstroke,

I'll give you
the first shot.

RED ROBIN: I'm gonna wipe
that half-smile...

right off your face.

Poison Ivy, you know
you're not a real plant, right?

(HISSES)

I see you're back to
your old self again.

I was convinced you'd
lost your memory, Joker.

Yeah, about that.

I had lost my memory.
I was a decent man.

(MUFFLED LAUGHTER)

What a joke.

But I had to do it!

It was the only way
I could get the upper hand.

I hypnotized myself to believe I was
someone else, so you would believe it.

And this little flower was the
trigger to snap me back to insanity.

HARLEY QUINN: We did it!

They're finally growing.

(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(SNIFFING)

(SIGHS IN SATISFACTION)

Harley, get ready.

Can't wait, Mr. J.

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(LAUGHTER CONTINUES)

See what happens
when you plant a seed

and let it grow into
something beautiful?

(LAUGHS)

It's good to return to the
land, get your hands dirty.

The French call it
"Nostalgie de la boue."

Romance of the mud.

You have to admit,
it was a great joke.

(GASPS)

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

The only way to deceive you
was to deceive myself.

And you fell for it
hook, line and flower.

(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Ha!

The time has finally
come for you to die.

(HARLEY QUINN EXCLAIMS
IN DISAPPOINTMENT)

Puddin', no!

(LAUGHS)

Time for some
girl-on-girl action.

(GRUNTS LOUDLY)

Careful, don't cut yourself.

It's over, Ivy.
You lost.

(HARLEY QUINN
LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Take your medicine,
kitty-kitty,

and say goodnight.

Keep your tongue
to yourself.

(HARLEY QUINN GROANING)

Bruce.

What am I going to do
with you, Batman?

You've destroyed a perfectly
good giant robot castle.

You're going to have to
answer for that.

Let's end this, Joker.
Just you and me.

With pleasure.

Oh, I'd hate to come all
the way to ancient Japan

and miss out on
a samurai sword fight.

Right, Bats?

Then you
won't be disappointed.

Not too bad. Making all
of my dreams come true.

- Happy to help.
- Oh, don't tease.

You're getting me excited.

(EXCLAIMS) That was a good one.

Oh, you can do
better than that.

Maybe you need to hit the dojo
and get some more practice,

work on your feint and parry.

Ooh!

I'm going to cut you to ribbons, tie
you in a bow, and give you to myself!

You're going to love it!

Ooh!

I really doubt that, Joker.

Sheesh.

Must be tough being a hero!

You don't dare kill me!
Isn't that right, Bats?

BATMAN: Don't test me!

See, you can't kill me.

(JOKER GROANS)

Oh, the hero
can't finish the job!

But I can.

Just look at how much
fun we're having,

Batman.

(GROANING)

Psych!

(PANTS)

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

You liked that,
didn't you?

(EXCLAIMS)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

It's not over!

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(JOKER GROANING)

(LAUGHS MALICIOUSLY)

(GASPING)

And so it's
finally over, Batman.

(JOKER GASPS)

You can't trust
everything you see, Joker.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

Do it. Just let go.

You can't do it,
can you?

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

The great Batman.
Not such a hero after all!

(SCREAMS)

(PANTS)

(JOKER EXCLAIMING IN ANNOYANCE)

BATMAN: Thank you
for all your help.

Of course. Our country can now
return to the way it was.

We will never forget
what you have done for us.

Thank you, Monkichi.
You were a great help.

(SOBBING)

It's time for me to go.
I'll never forget you.

(EXCLAIMING)

(SIGHS)

BATMAN: Activate
the Quake Engine.

(SERENE MUSIC PLAYING)

(CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

ALFRED: Master Bruce,

you'll be needing
this for tonight.

Huh? Ah, right,
of course.

Best not to keep
the Mayor waiting.

Is the car ready?

Yes. But it's
rather vintage.

(LAUGHS)

SHOPKEEPER: Tell me, where did you
come across such a rare find.

I just ran across it
on a trip.

I always keep my eye out
for interesting souvenirs.

You didn't expect me
to leave empty-handed, did you?

(HORSES APPROACHING)

(CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Subtitles by explosiveskull
Resync by GoldenBeard

(UPTEMPO JAPANESE SONG PLAYING)