Bardo Blues (2017) - full transcript

Bardo Blues is the story of a man coming to grips with tragedy by escaping to paradise. Set in Thailand, Bardo Blues follows Jack as he struggles to learn the truth about the mother that abandoned him and his own reason for existing. Weaving spiritual awakenings and soulful struggle, Bardo Blues will leave you questioning everything you think you know about who you are, where you came from and where you're going.

- How much?

- 3000 Baht, or 85
American dollars..

That's a great deal.

A massage like that
back in the states

would cost a lot more.

20 bucks.

- English?

- Hello.

- Hello.

Can I check in?

Can I check in now?

This is a hotel, right?

So, do you have
a room available?

Is there a secret hand shake?

Okay, you gonna stop
messing with me?

I'm exhausted, man.

If you have a room, I would
like to pay for a room.

That's how hotels work.

- One moment.

- I am so sorry.

Our overnight desk clerk
doesn't speak English

But let's start over.

My name is Gabriella and I am
the owner of the Hotel Kok.

- Nice to meet you.

- The name under
your reservation?

- Jack Shore, I'm the guy
that needs a hotel room.

- We just need your passport,

and then could you
fill out this form?

I didn't think any planes
got in this late, long night?

- First night in Thailand,
go big or go home, right?

- Room is 207, don't hesitate
to ask if you need any help.

If it's your first time in
Thailand it's easy to get lost,

so I'm happy to point you
in the right direction.

- Thank you, I'll
keep that in mind.

- Your room is just
up the stairwell,

down the hall and on the left.

- You've been working
so much lately,

let's get the hell out of here.

- You still want
to go to Thailand?

- Why not, it's supposed
to be beautiful.

- Who's gonna pay for it?

- From Gabriella.

- Thank you.

- Hi.

- What would you like?

- English, nice.

How about a coffee?

Oh hey, I don't suppose
that you've seen this woman?

- Photo isn't very good.

But no, I don't
think I've seen her.

Who you looking for?

- Just someone, thank you.

See ya.

- Oh, you know what,
there's coffee and breakfast

at the hotel, if I failed
to mention that last night,

I'm so sorry.

- Nah, no worries,
it was, you know,

three a.m. when
I checked in, so.

- Did you sleep?

- No, I didn't sleep.

- Jet lag?

- Yeah, jet lag.

Shouldn't you be at the
hotel just in case any more

you know, non-Thai speaking
idiots like me need a room?

- No, I write best at sunrise.

And the planes don't come
in for a couple hours, so,

I am safe from English
speaking tourists.

- What are you writing?

- Well, it's a novel of sorts.

- Really, what's it about?

- You really want to know?

It's about man's desperate
attempt to find one's self.

- Is that all?

- That's not enough?

- Have a nice day.

- When you're not in a hurry,
I'd love to tell you more.

- You know I'd like that,
I'm a writer as well, so.

- Really, well you
have a beautiful day.

- Shouldn't be too hard,
huh, supposed to be paradise?

- Most of the time.

- Where is
Jess going again?

- Uh, trade convention, Chicago.

- I thought she was tying
to cut down on work trips.

- She is, they're just
understaffed right now.

- Maybe they could hire Jack.

- Very funny.

- I wasn't laughing.

- I love that she's so
passionate about what she does,

but we just wish
she was around more.

I mean, we don't need the money.

- It's not about the
money if she loves

what she's doing.

- What about you, you got
anything on the horizon?

- No, can't get
any of these agents

to bite on the specs
I've been sending out.

- I don't know why anybody
ever paid you, to be honest.

Do you know back in
school I used to write

his English papers for him?

Never knowing he'd
actually become a writer.

- Brett, how are
rehearsals for the school play?

- Oh, um, great, just hope mom
doesn't miss our big night.

- She'll be back.

- Go ahead, tell him.

- Elizabeth, come on, don't
do this in front of Brett.

- Sorry Brett.

Tell Trevor where
you want to go.

- Elizabeth isn't
sold on the idea yet,

but I want to go to Thailand.

- What?

- Is this city hall?
- Yup.

- Um, I'm looking for
an American woman.

- American, there's a
lot of American women

live in Chaing Rai.

- Right, this one
never came home.

Can you check if there
are any businesses

registered in her name?

- There.

- Uh, I don't speak Thai.

- She English?
- American.

- Look at this, American name.

- Okay, so can you just tell me

where there's another
place I where I can find

any information on an American?

- Maybe ask another American?

- Nice.

Great city hall, bro.

- Hey, everything okay
with you and Elizabeth?

- Yeah, we're good.

- All right, we are talking
about Thailand later, okay?

- Goodnight Uncle Jack.
- Goodnight Brett.

- I'll see you
this weekend, bro.

- See you, Trev.
- Bye.

- See you, Brett.

- You know, customs
isn't gonna let you

bring drugs into Thailand.

- I had no idea,
thank you for that.

- Can you even go two weeks?

- Elizabeth, I'm
tired of apologizing.

- Yeah, well, I'm not tired
of hearing it quite yet.

- What can I get you?

- Entrepreneur, huh?

I like it, uh, beer, please.

- Thai Beer?

- Is there any other kind?

- You human.

- You too, buddy.

- You human.

- What are you talking about?

- Only humans come here.

- I can see that.

He's human, he's human,
he's human, he's human.

We're all human.

- Nick.
- Jack.

- Jack, awesome.

- Why is that awesome?

- I dunno, I was.

Okay, are you backpacking
through Thailand, or?

- No, I'm here for the study
abroad program for assholes.

- That was really funny.

Let me guess, uh,

you're looking for some weed.

- What makes you think that?

- Well, I don't know, you're
a GQ looking mother fucker

flashing beaucoup bucks
in a Thai shithole.

I mean, doesn't
take a scientist.

You're not here
because you human.

- Have you seen this woman?

- This is the most
beat up photograph

I've ever seen in my life.

- A simple no also works.

- You guys seen this woman?

- Back to the weed, then.

- So, you
going to Thailand?

- That's the plan, man.

- I heard it's beautiful.

- Yeah, I heard that too.

- Hey, Joe.
- Hi Elizabeth.

- Hi.

♪ Sweet baby blue, they
all want to taste you ♪

- Hey babe.
♪ Sweet baby blue ♪

♪ I want to, too ♪

♪ I don't want you comin' ♪

♪ Round here no more ♪
- How was work?

♪ Why don't you come
'round here no more ♪

- Don't look happy

Jesus Christ, this shit again?

♪ Pick my bleeding
heart off the floor ♪

- I got a confirmation email
from the airline today.

How dare you!

Thailand was still an open
discussion, and you know it.

- When was it gonna be
a closed discussion?

Come on.
- So tired of it.

♪ Sweet baby blue I
drink from your cup ♪

♪ Sweet baby blue ♪

- Come on.
- This isn't working

- Elizabeth,
where are you going?

- If you want, we
can go younger next time.

♪ Is burning you up ♪

- But that's more money.

- Don't be ridiculous.

- I'm tired of being used.

- Used?
- Yes, used.

- Are you serious?
- You haven't sold anything

in four fucking years.

- Yeah, and four years ago

dating a Hollywood screenwriter
was hot shit for you.

- I even have a virgin,

but I don't think
you can afford that.

- When I get back,
I want you gone.

- Oh, is this about money?

My 15 minutes of fame are up,

and I'm back to being
a struggling nobody?

- Fuck you!

- What do you want me
to do, quit writing?

Get a job I fucking
hate, like you?

You're being ridiculous.

- I can't do this anymore,
I don't want this.

♪ Sweet baby blue a
pleasure awaits you ♪

- Come on, Elizabeth.
- This isn't working.

- You're all that I have.

Elizabeth, I'm begging you,
you're all that I have.

- Get out.

- Where are you going?

Fine, I'll cancel the ticket.
- No, no, don't cancel

the tickets, okay,
go, go find her.

- Elizabeth, come on.
- Get out of my way.

- Come on, come on.
- Don't touch me,

get out my way!

Listen to me, when I get
back I want you gone.

♪ Heart off the floor ♪

♪ Off the floor ♪

♪ Off the floor ♪

- What?

- What would you
like for breakfast?

- Eggs, bacon, and coffee.

- Morning, you look rested.

- If only.

- Do you need a guide today?

- A guide?

Can I bring my camera
and my fanny pack?

Will there be a gift shop, too?

- All right, you
have a wonderful day.

And just know that I am
here if you need anything.

- Hey you, no smoking.

How you doin', bro?
- Good, I'm good.

Good to see you.

- Yeah, you too.

Put that out.

- The most important thing we do

is that we make our
guests feel at home.

We want to create an experience

that will last
with them forever.

We may not know what
brought them here

and we may never see them again,

but what we do know
is that we can create

a journey that is
a beautiful one.

All right, get back to work.

And be the peace that you
want to see in the world.

- Girls, girls!

Who will it be tonight?

- No girls, just the drugs.

- It's a package
deal, not a la carte.

- I just want to get
high, not fuck a teenager.

- Then no drugs.

- What is your fucking problem?

Can you see that the only
thing I want to fuck right now

is my own mind?

- I make the rules around here.

- Jack, pick me tonight.

- And tonight the rules
are drugs and girls,

or you can book a spa day at
your little hotel instead.

- Jack, I will make you feel
good tonight, like last night.

- No.

- Package deal.

- Fine...



Just dance.

- What is that?

You're not bringing those.

- Gotta look sharp
when you sleep.

- Trevor, you've been
married too long.

- We're both taken men, right?

- Actually, I wanted to
talk to you about Elizabeth.

We're not dating anymore.

- Seriously?

I guess this weekend just took
a turn for the better, huh?

- I'm not up for any of that.

- One sec.

What about this?

- What is that?

- We're going to Vegas.

- Thought we were
going mountain biking.

- No, how about we
just go to Vegas?

Dude, I could be your wingman.

- Vegas is the last
place I want to go.

- Good morning.

- Morning.

- How are you doing today?

- I'm swell.

- You know, people come
here for so many reasons.

What's yours?

- Why are any of us here, lady?

- I meet countless
tourists coming through.

You look like
you're here to stay.

Is that you?

- I haven't decided yet.

- Why not?

- What happened to your
pep talk on the roof

about how the customer
is always right,

or is that just for the help?

- I've just never seen
someone look so sad

in such a beautiful place.

I just thought maybe you
needed someone to talk to.

- Thank you, but no thank you.

- Okay.

- Espresso.

- Are you okay?

- I'm fine.

- No hello?

Is something wrong?

- I would appreciate it if
you'd stop following me,

and please stop prying
into my personal business.

- Okay, did I say
something wrong yesterday?

- How about five minutes
ago while we were

having breakfast at the hotel.

- I don't know what
you're talking about.

I've been here all morning.

- Five minutes ago while
we were having breakfast

you told me what a sad a
human being I was being.

- No, five minutes
ago you weren't here.

- At the hotel.

We were both at the hotel!

- Okay, you don't look well,

do you want to
come and sit down,

we'll talk about this?

- I think maybe later, thanks.

- You need to pay.

- I will.

Give me my space.

- Hey man, you come pay?

- Come on man, what do
you hope to accomplish

going to Thailand?
- Subject closed, Trevor,

back it off.

Can you unlock the door?

- Seriously, my grandma
thinks your hot.

My grandma thinks you're
like smoking hot, right.

Hey Jack, what's up
buddy, you want a beer?

- Yeah, definitely.

- What's up loner dude?
- Hey dude.

- Of course some Thai beer.

Is there any other kind?

That guy, he's a character.

Let me grab a chair real quick.

Hey, can I borrow this chair?

I've been meaning to ask
you, like why are you here?

- I'm just taking a
break from life, man.

- Life, dude?

I know why you're
really here though.

Don't you even sit
here and tell me

you're not here because you
want some more of that green.

- No, massage parlor across
the street has me set.

- She takes all my business.

- Where are you
off to next, man?

- Do I need a fucking
itinerary to drink here?

- Whoa, I was just
trying to figure out

if you're the exploring type.

- Obviously.
- Obviously, right.

All right, well then
you're gonna love this.

We're gonna go check out this
cave on the outside of town.

Inside the cave there's
this Ascended Master guy.

This crazy folklore, people
have been seeing this guy

walk around for like
over 2000 years.

- He's totally at peace, man.

Couldn't you do with
some of that shit?

- Are you guys serious?

- Yeah dude, we're serious.

It's like this legend, or I
guess it's more like a folktale,

or whatever but--
- Like a ghost.

- Did anybody say
ghost, did I say ghost?

It's not a ghost, it's
an ascended master.

He's ascended.

- What does that mean?

- It means you no longer
carry your past inside you.

- Yeah, okay, in layman's
terms, you become pure light.

Like, you know what I mean?

There are no obstacles
for the Ascended Master.

- Huh?
- He's like Buddha.

Who gives a shit, man?

We're going to a cave and
we're getting drunk, you in?

- Yeah dude, you should
have just said that.

- Yeah!
- Drunk in a cave.

- Drunk in a cave.

- So where you been
sleeping, exactly?

You'll stay with Jess and I

until you get
things figured out.

- So, forever?

I don't need your charity, bro.

- It's not charity,
you're my brother.

But it better not be forever.

- Lemme guess, you haven't moved

since I saw you here yesterday

and your last
chapter is finished?

- Not quite, let me guess,

you haven't slept
because your mind

has been running on
drugs, beer, and women.

- That's not fair.

I made an educated guess,
you have the luxury

of smelling the beer
sweating from my pores.

You want a cup of coffee?
- Sure.

- Can I smoke?

- I can handle it.

You're not having breakfast
at the hotel again?

- Not after yesterday.

- Yesterday?

- Thank you.

Let's not ruin this.

- Okay.

- You love it here?

- I do, I like the
serenity, the beauty,

the peace, everywhere.

- Not everywhere.

- Well, there are two
sides to this place

but I like to acknowledge
the bright side.

We all have a choice in
that, don't you think?

- You're really a
writer, you're not just

another lonely lady
with a note book?

- Yeah, I'm really am a writer.

- Sorry.

- Is that why you are here?

- It's not why I came, but
it could be why I stay.

At least for a while.

- You know, many people come
here and they don't know why.

Is that you?

- No, I know why I am here.

See, I'm close, I can feel it.

I'm looking for my mother.

- Any idea where she might be?

- No, apparently, if you leave
your kids and your husband

when you're 29, and you head
to Thailand you can disappear.

- What kind of mother does that?

- Mine.

Elizabeth, Elizabeth, come on,

listen, please.
- No, I don't care.

You understand me, I don't
care if you pay me back.

- Just Elizabeth,
just come with me

to Thailand, please.

- You're
a fucking addict.

It's over, all right,
stop calling me.

How many times do
have to tell you?

I should have left you
- Elizabeth, Elizabeth.

- years ago, like your mother.

- You okay?

Jack, come on, let's go.


- Are you okay?

- I'm fine.

I'm just realizing as
I am trying to escape

the ruins of my life
that there's one problem.

You can't escape your own mind,

that shit follows
you everywhere.

- Yeah, the mind never quits.

I mean, it's like it's own form,

until we realize that
we can control it.

- Yeah but, how do
you control this?

This thing has a
mind of its own.

- I know.
- You know, this thing

is filling my skull
with so much noise.

- Well, there's this man,

and he's called the
ascended master.

- No, no, no, not you too.

- Really Jack, he lives in a
cave right outside of town.

And if he reveals himself, the
mind instantly stops, okay.

No more chatter, and
you're forever changed.

- How does everybody
know about this

Ascended Master but me?

- Well maybe you
should find out.

- Jesus Christ.

- He was one too.

- I have an idea.

How about I go to
this cave and I ask

this 2000 year old man
why my mother abandoned me

and what I'm even doing
here looking for her?

- I, I think you should.

Why not, you may see a sign.

Often people have the signs
right in front of them

and they don't even see them.

Maybe that's you?

- It's always a
pleasure talking to you.

- Why beat around the bullshit?

- I'm just looking to
escape the bullshit.

- You're
not gonna find her.

- Key doesn't work, man.

- Key work yesterday?

- Yeah.

- Then key work today.

Lock no change.

- No, I'm telling you
that the key doesn't work.

Now I need to get
into my hotel room.

- Don't speak English.

- What?

- No speak English.

- You just spoke English.

Now, let me into my hotel room.

- Go see Clare, she help you.

- Can you help me?

- I'm not sure
anybody can help you.

- What is that supposed to mean?

- You still have
a bill here kid.

- I know and I'm
gonna pay it in full.

- Really?

- Room seven has door problem.

- Did you fix it?

- His problem to fix.

- We talked about
this, remember?

You fix the small
problems so the guests

can focus on more
important things.

- I try again.

- My key isn't working and
the guy at the front desk

won't seem to help me,
but he seems to think

that you can help.

- They only help those
that help themselves.

- What are you talking about?

- I'll send
someone with a key.

Wait next door.

- Your guest is making
his problems my problems.

- You created the
problem to begin with.

- I'm so tired of your customers

bringing their bullshit
issues into my house.

- Just go back to your
people, we're fixing it.

- My people are your
people, you know that.

- My people choose a way out.

- Fuck you, I'm telling him.

- No, you can't.

- Oh, can't I?

- You'll take us all
down, and you know that.

- I am already living in hell,
what does it matter to me?

- Where is he?

- Did you send Jack to Clare?

- He need help.

- She's not going to
help him, you know that.

- But he looking.

- He needs to find what
he's looking for by himself.

- Wait up, you guys.

You see anything yet?

- Nothing but
this 20 foot Buddha.

- You know, from
what I understand

you have to ask him to change
something about your life.

He'll appear or something.

- All right, let's see if he
can change my entire life then.

That sounds simple enough.

- Just one thing,
change one thing.

- My life is one thing.

It's a singular noun.

- I see him!

I see him guys, I see him.

- No way.

- You really see him?

- There is no way.

- I see him, there!

- There's no way you
see a 2000 year old man

living in a cave.

- You don't believe,
man, that's your problem.

- Yeah dude, just try believing.

Just try it for five seconds.

Like, everything you see
is just a belief, you know.

- Reveal yourself.

- Try again with a
little more passion.

- Reveal yourself!

Reveal yourself,
you ascended master.

I've one problem that I
definitely need fixed.

Please remove the
asshole from my body

that makes me an asshole.

I believe, I believe,

that I could use
another beer right now.

- All right well, we tried.

He doesn't speak for all of us.

Did you really see him?

- I swear, man.

- What did he look like?

- Dusty.
- Dusty?

- Did you sleep?

- All right, let's
talk about you today.

What's a dame like you
doing in a dump like this?

- Why not?

- You gonna me tell you've
got life all figured out?

- Certainly.

- Okay, I know what
you're writing about.

You're writing about
how your wealthy husband

left you for a transgender
priest living in Oslo.

- Close.

- Well, now you know what
kind of book I'd read.

- Really?

- I know what you
should write about.

You should write about how
pharmaceutical companies

are bribing the doctors
to overprescribe

and ADD medication.

- I feel like you may know
a little bit more about that

than you'd like to.

- You know, they've just been
such a big part of my life

for a such a long time.

It's hard to get
off the treadmill.

- Yeah, I guess the
only thing we can do

is end our own vicious cycle.

I mean, if each person did that.

- Were you a kindergarten
teacher in your past life?

- I know it
sounds overly simplified,

but karma or whatever
you want to call it,

It catches up with you.

Even if someone doesn't see it,

you are, quite simply,
the sum of your choices.

- Will you just sit
up front with me?

This is crazy.

- Just ask already.

- I shouldn't have to
ask, you know that, right?

You should just tell me.

Okay, is it an insurance thing,

like you can't get 'em,
or is it a fuck you meds?

Or is this one of your

I don't need them--
- I don't like them.

I don't like the way
they make me feel.

- There's
gotta be some kind of solution

that keeps you--
- Sedated?

♪ It's a choice ♪

♪ To stay ♪

♪ It's a dream ♪

♪ And I want to wake ♪

♪ You are blood on your hands ♪

- When we get back, I'm gonna
make sure that you're covered.

Dad and I'll find you
a plan of some kind.

Something that lets you keep
your edge, so you can write,

but, but also keeps you
from being a dickhead.

- Cool, you go find that
magical little substance.

- Fuck you, you need the meds.

- You need me on the meds.

You and dad and
Jessica need to keep me

as a little zombie.

- That's bullshit
and you know it.

- Let me out of this car.

- We're almost there.

- If you don't let
me out of this car

I'm jumping out.

- You're not gonna jump out.

Jack, Jack, dammit.


(pop music in the background.

- Buddy, bad news,
I'm all out of weed.

But we can probably
go score some

across the street, I think.

- I was kind of hoping to
could avoid that place tonight.

- Sorry dude,
but if you want weed.

- Hey, have
you seen this woman?

- Maybe you should
ask her in Thai.

She might have
thought you were just

trying to give her a photograph.

- Opium and the same gal, eh?

- No, just some weed.

- Aww, my girl not fuck
you right last night?

- It was fine, can I just
have a hit and a massage?

Just a massage.

- I'll discount her tonight.

- No, thank you.

- $5 for a blow job.

- Who do you think
you are, lady?

You can't force me
to fuck a prostitute.

- My name is Clare.

- Okay, Clare, can I just
get a hit and a massage,

without anyone trying to
touch my dick, please?

- Yes, tonight that will
be acceptable, room 10.

- Thank you.

No, no, I said no.

- But I want to.

- I said stop, okay, get off me.

Get off me.

Get off me.

Hey, man, I'm
waiting on some money

to come through from back home.

Is there anyway I could have--

- No problem, you good man.

- Let's not get
crazy, but thank you.

Okay, nothing spiritual today,

let's just talk
about the weather.

- And that's not spiritual?

- I miss the weather back home.

- Where's home?

- Los Angeles.
- Really?

- But I'm originally
from Vermont.

- What did you do last night?

- How I spend my
days are different

than how I spend my nights.

- Jack.


- Give me the keys.

I'm driving, give me the keys.

- If I give you the keys
you'll get back in the car?

- Yes.

- Hey, hey, listen to
me, we're almost there.

It's right up this hill.

I've been here before,
you're gonna love it.

- We're going home.

- What, I'm driving.

- If you want to drive,

I'm walking home.
- I'm driving.

Okay, okay, fine,
you're driving.

- What
chapter are you on?

- You said you can't talk
about anything spiritual.

- Okay, I got it,
I got it, I got it.

- Is there anything
else off limits?

'Cause I'd hate to ask
the wrong question.

- Okay, let me see the
book, let me see it.

Life and death are the same

after you rid yourself
of your karmic energy.

- Consider Pandora's Box opened.

- One minute.

- My boss say you
have to pay now.

- I will, just let
me just send this,

and I'll get you your money.

- No, leave now, no
money, no computer.

Get out!
- Do you recognize this--

- No, no, no, leave
now, leave now.

Get out of here.

- Just face it
Trevor, I'm a fuck up.

No job, no life,
no girl, no home.

- Take it easy, slow it down.

- Don't tell me what to do.

- No, I, I'm
not, just slow it down.

- I am not a kid anymore.

- Nobody said you were.

Come on man, I have a
family at home, slow down!

- A short and a tall.

- Jackie!
- What, no Thai beer?

- Hey man, what's up buddy?

- I never thanked you for
that trip you sent me on.

- Dude, I'm glad you liked it.

- Oh, I loved it man,
the scenery, fresh air.

- Well, we're gonna re-up again
in like an hour in my room.

- That means I got
like an hour to get

a bunch of women and booze
up to your hotel room.

- I think
you can handle it.

- Dude, I can handle it.

- Perfect, well I'm
gonna get things started.

- Trevor!

- Get out of my bag, dude.

- Are you serious?

- Yeah man, we did
it all, it's gone.

What time is it?

- It's like six.

- I think it's a little early

to start another
bender, don't you.

Dude I like you, you gotta
get your shit together.

- This from a drug dealer.

- Why are you here, man?

- I'm trying to do more drugs,

but my drug dealer
is being an asshole.

- No, I mean, you
don't belong here.

Like why did you come here?

- You know why I'm here man,
I'm looking for my mother.

- Drugs help you
find your mother?

- No.

- So, why are you here?

- I killed my brother.

It was an accident.

- Jesus.

- You gonna help me or not?

- I can't dude.

I only assist in
drugs that help.

- Fuck you, they are helping.

I'll get them somewhere else.

- I bet you will.

♪ They're saying a lot
of bad, bad things ♪

♪ About you girl ♪

♪ They're saying a lot
of bad, bad things ♪

♪ About you ♪

♪ Honey what I want to know is ♪

♪ Are the bad things true ♪

♪ They're saying a lot
of bad, bad things ♪

♪ About you girl ♪

- Is this Jack Shore?

This is Charles from
the funeral home.

We've had Trevor Shore here

for the last two days without
instructions, or payment.

What would you like to do?

I can take a credit
card over the phone

and we can at least
start preparing him

for the funeral.

- You came back, surprise.

- I don't want any more women.

Just give me the stuff.

- Stuff, now, now,
Jack, say please.

- You aren't my mother,
lady, sell me the drugs.

- No, it's a package
deal, you know that Jack.

- You're a drug dealer and
I need drugs, do your job.

- You don't tell me what
my job is, young man.

For starters, you've
have an open tab here

that I have so
generously extended.

And second, if you want your
stuff, you take it my way.

- What is going on here?

- I know what you
need, Jacky boy.

- Fuck you.

- You need a woman, Jack!

- Fuck you, lady.

- Put him on the phone,

put him on the phone now, Jack.

- I'm so sorry, dad.

- Put him on the
phone now, now, no.

- Hey.

You're probably the only
person I haven't asked.

Have you seen this woman?

- Don't know white people
in Chiang Rai, only you.

- You know Gabriella.

- And Clare.

- Oh, thanks for
meeting me here.

- No worries, I
needed some fresh air.

- How are you feeling?

- I've been okay,
I've been good.

I've been sober for three days.

- Well that's great, okay, I
want to show you something.

We' re all on a path
that is ever evolving

and one has to accept that.

Life is just about
repeating old patterns

until they're broken.

- You know,
I live in this state

of perpetual movement.

See I am on a bike!

Am I learning?

- Yes!

- I guess the
question really is,

at any given moment what
direction are we going?

- Yeah but, we have to be
going somewhere, right?

This can't be all there is.

- You know,
Jack, you can trust me.

- I know, oddly
enough, I know that.

- Talking about your
brother can really

make you feel better.

- How did you know
about my brother?

- Well, men say strange things
in the throes of withdrawals.

- I don't know what to say.

I killed my brother and
I hate myself for it.

It's been 12 days,

and I'm finally
feeling something.

Not better, but something.

- Let's go in the temple.

- Tried finding any
business owned by an American

and the owner of the hotel
was trying to help me,

but you know, no such luck.

- Have you
tried the whore house?

That's run by an American.

- I don't think my
mother is running

a whore house in Thailand.

- I knew I could find you here.

You know, you have a
bill you need to pay up.

- I will, the money
is on its way.

- Fine, take him.

I'm done waiting for
you to choose, Jack,

you choose now.

- The money is coming, okay.

My father is sending me money.

- I don't care about
the money, son.

This is all I care about.

Throw him over there.

- You'll be taking this to
the airport for us tonight.

- Are you out of
your fucking mind?

Why are you people
doing this to me?

- You either take
that to the airport,

or the next delivery you make

will be from inside that cooler.

- No, no, no, you
people are crazy.

- Jackie, don't be so dramatic.

He is waking up,
get him, get him.

We are not getting caught.

- It's you, the whole
fucking time it's been you.

- I've been here for you the
whole time son, come home.

Get him, get him now!

Bring my baby home!

- I need help.

- Finally, you see
I can help you.

- No, this isn't a joke, is
there a place that I can hide?

- You cannot hide forever, Jack.

- Help me, please help me!
- It's time to wake up.

- Where is the back door?

- Hello Jack.

- What are you doing here?

It doesn't matter, okay,
I have to get out of here.

- Where?
- Anywhere!

Is there a place
that I can hide?

- So you're choosing my help?
- Yes.

- You're choosing help?
- Jesus Christ, yes!

I'm choosing you and your help.

- Come with me.

Jack, you have to forgive
yourself for killing your brother.

- Forgive myself, here, now?

- It's the only way
to break the cycle.

You haven't paid your
debt spiritually.

It's not money
that you owe, okay.

You can't bargain
yourself out of this.

- Just please stop.

- You can't escape anymore.

You need to decide if you want
to live in heaven or hell.

- What does that mean, what
kind of choice is that?

- It's the choice you
made when you went back

into the massage parlor over
and over, why did you do that?

- How do you know that?

- Jack.
- No, answer me.

- She is not gonna help you.

She's only gonna take
you further into hell.

- Who, the prostitute?

- Your mother.

- How do you know
she's my mother?

- How did you not know?

What does that say about her,

what she is and what
she's done to you?

Where you actually are.

Do you know where you are Jack?

Where are you going?

Jack, come back.

- Hey dad.

I don't need your charity, bro.

- Jack, where
are you going, Jack?

- You have
to accept what you did.

Just open the package.

- I don't want to.

- Because
you know what's in it.

Just open it, please.

Open the package.

- Oh my God, I did that.

- You did.

- So I'm dead, I've been
dead this whole time?

- Yes, you'll never
quiet the mind.

Until the mind quiets.

- It's not that easy.

- It can be.

Just forgive yourself
and you can be free.

Then you get out of Bardo.

- I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

- I know, it's all right bro.

You just have to
make one more step

before you're truly free.

- What are
you doing here?

- I have always been
here, Jack, always.

I am you.

I was you in your last life.

There we realized everything
we see and perceive

is a reflection of our karma.

But when we are reborn,
you forgot it all again.

Jack, you cannot escape it now.

You can't escape me.

This is Bardo.

You will keep on living
these aspects of your life

over and over again
until you reconcile

or eradicate your darkness.

Wake up, Jack, this
is your choice.

- My choice.

It's my choice to live
in heaven or hell?

Why didn't I choose to live?

Because I couldn't live
with myself anymore.

So now I have to forgive
myself for killing my brother.

Forgive myself for
taking my own life.

I just thought I escaped
life, but life never stops.

It just changes dimensions.

I didn't know I was dead
when I entered the hotel.

I didn't know every time I
had a thought in the past

it was me reviewing my life.

I didn't know my mother
died in Thailand.

I just wanted to find her.

So even in my death I
was still searching.

Heaven and hell is a state
of mind that never ends.

It's consciousness.

It's just consciousness,
either in life or in death.

Well I guess now that
I've awakened to that,

let's get the hell out of
here and get to heaven.

♪ Wake me, wake me up ♪

♪ Wake me up when we get there ♪

♪ Wake me up, wake me up ♪

♪ Anything goes in
the neon south ♪

♪ Four nights and three days ♪

♪ It's an odyssey
though just the same ♪

♪ But in a colored
room to turn you over ♪

♪ Purple face but
my smile remains ♪

♪ Wake me up, wake me up ♪

♪ Wake me up when we get there ♪

♪ Wake me up, wake me up ♪

♪ Anything goes in
the neon south ♪

- You're up early.

- I didn't sleep.

- Jet lag?

- Jet lag?

You have no idea what
I've been through.

- You'd be surprised.

I've been there about
a thousand times.

♪ Oh lord, lord, lord ♪

♪ Lord, lord, lord ♪

♪ Lord, lord, lord ♪

♪ Lord, lord, lord ♪

♪ Life ain't not go alibi ♪

♪ Death is ready to be tried ♪

♪ Love was caught
right in the eye ♪

♪ Just when it
pulled the trigger ♪

♪ Drop that weapon,
put it down ♪

♪ Put your hands
up, turn around ♪

♪ Read your rights,
face to the ground ♪

♪ It's time for your surrender ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Got a lot of life put down ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Got a lot of life put down ♪

♪ Got a warrant,
search that house ♪

♪ Turn this castle inside out ♪

♪ Found a bunch
of broken hearts ♪

♪ In luck for an indictment ♪

♪ Final verdict, jury's out ♪

♪ Beyond reasonable doubt ♪

♪ Guilty, guilty,
they all shout ♪

♪ But innocence she's walking ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Got a lot of life to live ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Got a lot of life to live ♪

♪ Start that fire,
bring the rain ♪

♪ Let it wash away the stains ♪

♪ On your hands
down to the drain ♪

♪ Burn that passion,
fan the flames ♪

♪ Suck that poison
out your veins ♪

♪ Kill the feature
out the pain ♪

♪ Love has always
been to blame ♪

♪ But she don't never complain ♪

♪ Got a lot of life to go ♪

♪ Life ain't got no alibi ♪

♪ Death is ready to be tried ♪

♪ Love was caught
right in the eye ♪

♪ Just when it
pulled the trigger ♪

♪ Oh lord ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪