Bala (2019) - full transcript

I am sitting on top of everyone's head.

Big or small, I'm the centre
of attraction in every mirror

I am a treat for the eyes.

And add likes to your selfies.

I am the hero's style
and the heroine's oomph factor.

The secret of your beauty...

...and the permanent crown on your head.

I am treated no less than God.

Because we both get oil in offerings

I am 'Hair'!

The most important factor...



The skin on your head...
The protector of your brain...

If you have me,
I am a treasure to cherish...

...without I am just a lifelong regret.

I'm an important contribution
to everyone's life.

This is the story of one such character.

"Bala."

"Bala."

"Bala."

Good morning, sir.

Good morning. Sit.

Mannerless

Hey Baldy

Meet Balmukund Shukla.

Kanpur's Shahrukh Khan (Star)!



Bala was simply in
love with his thick hair.

Ajju...just blow dry it.

Bala, DDLJ style is old news.

K3G style is the new trend now.

In big cities small things
keep happening senorita

'The little missy's in school
were crazy about this Shahrukh ripoff.'

'Except for his friend Latika.'

Due to my ugly looks, I was named Kubja.

The world mocked me.

No one ever came close to me.

But it isn't my fault...

that the Lord made me ugly.

Let me alleviate your pain forever...

Come Kubja, let me make
you beautiful in every aspect.

Hey...

Latika. Give me your science book.

I won't.

Don't be such a spoilsport.
Please give no.

As I said, no means no.

Return my notes.

Hi!

I said return my notes...

Hey...

...save these hollow threats
for someone else.

Otherwise, when I am done with you...

...you'll regret being born. Hey...

Move.

Wait.

Listen, please...

- What's this?
- Bala...

What is it now?

Latika.

Next time you want to impress
someone with the notes...

...then focus more on making
your own notes rather than mimicry.

Understand.

Shruti, please.

Shruti. Shruti.

What do you think of yourself?

I mean...what's the attitude all about?

Whether I talk to another
girl or lend her my notes.

Why does it bother you?

Are you out of your mind?

I am not interested in idiots like you.

And you have no right to be.

With this black face.

All the beautiful girls in school
are crazy about me.

And people like you should
be banned from even thinking about me.

Dark Kubja.

Not another word from you...

...or else I'll slap you so hard...

you'll bounce all the
way to the company garden.

I'll say it a hundred times.
You can do whatever you like.

Dark Kubja. Dark Kubja.

Notice the lad's attitude.

It's all because of me

But even the ten headed
Ravan's pride was shattered.

And this is just one
headed Bala we're speaking of.

"Baldy."

"Baldy."

So, at the tender age of 25...

...Bala had lost 45% of his hair.

I am a rascal...

Doesn't take me long
to turn a star into extra.

"Your brother's abuses..."

"...and your standing ovations..."

"And every time I went
flat broke in your love.."

"I will never forget..."

"As long as I'm alive...

"As long as I'm alive..."

"As long as I'm alive..."

"Dumping me like yesterday's newspaper."

"And ignoring me whenever I am around."

"I will never forget..."

"I will never forget..."

Very good. Very good.

When I make an exit from your life,
I don't exit alone.

I take your happiness, your smile,

and even your 13-year-old
steady girlfriend.

- You are so sweet.
- Dumps you without a notice.

I had already warned you...

...that she is not trustworthy.

Let's drop this topic.

I've said so many times,
I've diabetes, go easy on the butter.

It won't hurt, son. Eat it.

Aim at your mother.

Vihaan, do you want a beating.

- You two have breakfast as well.
- Fine... Harder.

I guess they'll have
breakfast at lunch break.

Yes brother, you eat because of for your
heartbreak, and we'll have at lunch break.

Everyone in this house is a comedian.

See, grandpa...

...he's growing brazen by the day.

Don't get mad at him.

I wish you had focused on
off break instead of heartbreak...

...then you would
be playing for Ranji like me...

Go on... Go on...

Compare his heartbreak with cricket.

Some mango seeds.

God bless you.

What? Is there an LCD screen
on my head that you are staring at it?

It's nothing...

I was just wondering.

Wondering what?

Why did Shruti break up with you?

You want a beating.

Perfect catch.

Why are you digging his wounds?

Bala, you should forget Shruti.

Soon you will find an angel.

Stop carrying this makeup everywhere.

There's no future in
selling beauty products, son.

You are an artist,
so follow your passion. Understand.

You followed your passion, didn't you?

But where did that get you?

How many people in Kanpur
have played for Ranji.

I followed my passion
and that got me somewhere.

Don't I want my son
to be successful as well.

I am still trying.

When I make a name for myself in comedy,
I'll quit this job.

"Baldy."

"Baldy."

"Baldy."

"Baldy."

"Set out like an emperor..."

"Watch him go..."

"He thinks no one's better than him..."

"He's non stop."

- "He's on the top."
- Hold this bag.

"He lives in a classical world
where he's hip-hop."

- "With his head held high..."
- Where to?

- "He walks with pride."
- This is important, I'll be back soon.

"Because he believes
he's the star of Kanpur."

Bala, how are you?

"Rupan, the more cola you drink...

...sooner you'll explode.

Don't forget."

Don't cross your limits.

Just one more time Rajesh Khanna, please.

Nothing in this world comes
for free, aunty.

How many women are you sending from your
neighborhood for attending the seminar?

I love it.

You know what...

First, help me out with Insta...

...and then I'll do your job.

You never skip an
opportunity to blackmail me.

Here you go.

Show me.

Little more... Just a little more...

- She will be hardly recognizable.
- Come on...

I have a question...

What is this seminar
you conduct for all the girls?

I have the perfect solution
for girls who can't get married.

What has Latika done to you?

Why don't you invite her?

I've never said no.

- Then?
- Bring her over.

But don't tell her that I invited her.

Yes, aunty.

What was so urgent?

Actually,
I am coming down to your court...

...and we've to attend
a seminar together.

What seminar?

Bala's invited us.

And especially you.

Look here, aunty,
I am not coming to any stupid seminar.

I know you're a lawyer,
but I am the judge in this family.

I am coming down there.
And now I am hanging up.

Hello...

...aunty?

You must be wondering why I called you
all down here in the middle of the day.

So let me start with my presentation.

These are some matrimonial
ads from the leading newspapers.

Meaning Marriage column.

That one factor everyone's
stressed on...is fairness.

Education,
caste, creed, etcetera all come later.

Just one demand.

Fair girl wanted.

Fair girl wanted.

Probably you missed these
matrimonial due to some reason.

But you must have heard these songs.

Bhajan Samrat Anup Jalota said...

"Says to Mother Yashoda, Nandlala..."

"...why is Radha so fair,
and me so dark?"

Kumar Sanu said...

"O fair one...don't steal my heart."

"O fair one..."

Udit Narayan...

"Black glasses on the fair face."

In short...

Who is fair is beautiful.

I am not saying this

It's the ideology of society.

A tradition that's being
followed since the onset of time.

And no matter what you do
we cannot change this ideology.

Don't be disheartened, my friends...

You can't change this ideology, but
you can change the colour of your skin.

Presenting Pretty You...

5 weeks...

Yes, in only 5 weeks
it will make you fair...

Pretty You...

Filled with herbal chemicals...

...for that fairness inside you.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I had a question.

- Can I come over there?
- No, you can ask from right there.

- I'll come there.
- You can ask from your seat...

- Move.
- Save your questions for the...

Why do you have that cap on your head?

We are in a closed room.

Is it too sunny for you?

My cap, my choice.

Take it off.

No one else seems to be bothered,
except for you.

- Take it off.
- I won't.

Don't be shy.

Take it off.

What's wrong Balmukund?

Didn't your company make
a product for this baldness...

Filled with herbal chemicals...

Please, continue.

Leave.

I said leave.

So where was I?

Let me introduce you to my products.

Here's...

This is our beauty bar.

No, this is virgin coconut oil

Apply it on your hair before you sleep.

This is our beauty bar.

You can buy it at a discount of 15%

Let's make it 20.

In fact, buy one get one free.

Total waste.

Mr. Shukla.

Why are you hiding back there?

Show your face.

You're looking pretty dapper today.

Why did you spoil the seminar yesterday?

Things went a little awry.

But I'll cover it up
in the next seminar.

You claimed to have
a fire when you joined us.

What happened to it now?

Sorry, sir. It won't happen again.

Until you don't...

...sit with Mr. Bharadwaj
and take care of the inventory.

- Mr. Bharadwaj...
- Yes, sir...

I am sending a partner for you.
Now you won't feel lonely anymore.

Thank you, sir.

But sir, I'm in marketing.

I need presentable boys for marketing.

Young and energetic.

But I am young... what else am I?

Varun, come.

Now that's young.

We're the same age.

Handover your rocket to him.

Now he's going to fly it.

- Varun.
- Yes, sir.

Understand all the areas properly...

- ...and go in all guns blazing.
- Yes, sir.

What is this?

What is this?

- What is this?
- Listen to me, sweetheart.

There's nothing to hear.

I'll slap you so hard
you won't know what hit you.

- Where's the blade?
- Not the blade... Not the blade...

- You'll hurt someone.
- Bala, what's going on?

Jaggi...

Before I cut you down to size, get out.

Customer is God, Bala. Jaggi...

Enough of your crap.

You were being such a smartass and said that
putting oil for 15 days will stop my hair fall.

I did... I did...but listen to me...

I'm losing more hair now.

Everyone in office calls me old man.

Fooling your own friend.
Aren't you ashamed?

You're an embarrassment
to our friendship...

You're turning bald!

What do you expect me to do?

I am a barber.

I cut hair, not grow them.

But hair is your expertise, isn't it?
That is why I am asking you...

Don't be sad.

There is one way.

See.

This is a Thekla.

Toupe in English.

Just stick it wherever
you don't have hair.

- I don't need this Thekla.
- Why?

Masturbation and sex
are two different things.

This is masturbation.
I want the real deal.

I want to grow...real hair.

How is that possible, brother?

This land is completely barren.

Are you stupid?

I know the problem, give me a solution.

Your solution is right before you...

...and you're looking elsewhere.

Brother Bachchan...

Who's this scrawny guy?

He's my sidekick.

But I want to be yours.

Give me a sure-shot solution.

Well...

let's look at the problem area first.

Someone might see me...

Unbelievable ...

Wait.

The things I've to do.

What the bloody...

You were called Bala because
of your silky hair, weren't you?

Yes, brother.

But now look at it.

Don't be disappointed.

Look, son, you're not the
first guy in the world who is bald.

The world's full of it.

In fact, even Rajnikant sir is bald.

Even though he's like...

I was a star in school... A star...

I've lived like a star.

I am not used to be an extra.
I can't live like this.

Now you tell me...

How can a star live like an extra?

You can't imagine my pain.

I can't focus on my job...

Selfies make me self-pity

My childhood girlfriend dumped me...

for an idiot.

The guy looks like me,
except for one difference...

Silky wavy hair...

...which I don't have.

I am not just losing hair,
but also my identity.

I must admit...

I must admit, son...

You've taken the pain
of baldness to the next level.

I am losing hair...

Please save me, brother.

It's a difficult task.

But I'll do it.

And thus began the struggle to make
this impossible mission possible.

Why are you standing on your head, son?

This ensures better blood
supply to the hair roots.

The infallible solution to falling hair.

Keep trying.

"It shall rain again..."

"...and you shall be blessed
With lushness."

Stop staring at the puppy dog.

Here's an idea...

Mix castor oil, olive oil,
coconut oil, jute seed oil...

Who wants these?

I don't know.

Mother asked me to bring these.

Your mother's losing hair too.

It must be hereditary.

Put it all in a bag.

Aunty, there must be
several songs on the moon.

"My heart's like the moon."

"The moon's out tonight..."

"Shining like the full moon..."

And "shine brightly
over the horizon, O moon."

Balmukund...

You're forgetting your stuff...

I don't want it.

But what about the patch on your head.

First, you should go take
a look at yourself in the mirror.

The day you do that...

...you will stop looking in the mirror.

That reminds me...

I met Shruti, from school.

Your ex-girlfriend.

She was telling me that
she dumped you.

Why did she dump you?

Vihaan...

- Apply this on your brother's head.
- Oh, mom...

Vihaan.

Slow down, will you...
I already have a bald patch.

Don't worry.

"These silky tresses."

"These mesmerizing eyes..."

"Gives me a reason to live."

"These silky tresses."

Here you go.

I will not commit this blasphemy
for the sake of your hair.

Never in this lifetime.
Eggs in my house, never.

This is my house, not yours.

Don't forget you're
a live-in son-in-law.

You moved in claiming you'll
stay only for three months,...

...but you've been here for 30-years now.

Stop it, papa.

Vihaan...give your brother a hand.

Careful while applying it.

Don't let a single
drop fall on the ground.

"It shall rain on you again."

"And you'll be blessed with lushness."

"It shall rain on you again."

"Bala..."

I'm about to tell you the biggest
sorrow of a young man.

Baldness.

I was bald.

Girls would ignore me.

"Then I found this
amazing thermal cap."

"This gives warmth to my hair roots."

Bala, your tea's right here...

Nerds.

"It shall rain on you again."

Wow...

I owned this race and I always win 'Cause
I am the oldest player of this race.

Wow...

She always said the
revolution will come...

Will they bring revolution?

Alone in the race...

I called my school teacher baldy...

Teased him.

I drew his picture on the board.

And now I'm being punished
for mocking a teacher.

Whenever I look at myself in the mirror
I can hear "Baldy" ringing my ears.

You think too much.

Stop thinking about your hair.

This is exactly why
you're losing hair.

This...

- "After Holi..."
- Don't think, don't think about it at all

"...will come Diwali."

"It shall rain on you again."

"Bala."

I see you when I close my eyes.

I want to see you when I open my eyes.

My eyes...

...look for my love

Call it love, madness, or

Son Bala...

I heard Rubbing onion on the
head helps grow new hair.

Vihaan...give your brother a hand.

Oh, God.

Did you wash your hands?

Look...we found someone
for you on the matrimony site.

She's as fair as an angel, see

I don't want to get married.

Listen...

I am talking
from personal experience.

You should walk down
the aisle while you still can.

Otherwise,
you don't have a chance later.

- There's a bigger patch on this side.
- Get lost.

How are you going to fill this football
field with a couple of hair strands?

I need a temporary fix...

...so I can meet with the girl.

I'll give your hair a makeover...

...that no one's going
to notice this patch.

Just watch...

I don't want a makeover,
I want an entire lush up here.

You underestimate me.

What is this?

Close your eyes...

and witness the magic.

"It will rain on you again."

"Bala."

Bala...why don't you
have a word with her?

I've heard you're
into mimicry as well.

Let's hear something then.

Well, who would you prefer?

Dev sir...or...

...Shahrukh Khan.

Actually, I like Ranbir Kapoor more.

I never tried before,
but can give it a shot.

Hello, this is Ranbir Kapoor.

You're the best.

Will you marry me?

Mummy...

What else do you expect
when you try Ajju's amateur ideas?

Listen...

I have the perfect solution for you.

Make a mixture of buffalo dung
and bull's semen and put it on your head.

You'll have long wavy hair.

Here you go, mister.

And this will be 1500 extra.

Vihaan...give your brother a hand.

All I ever do is give him a hand.

I've other things to do.
I can't do this anymore.

Why not?

Stop exploiting me, brother.
I beg you.

Even inmates at jail
don't get tortured so much...

...as much as you guys torture me.

Every morning after I get up...

...I'm stressed wondering what dirty
thing will I have to touch today.

Now I'll give you a beating too.

I don't care.

I am not scared of anyone.

I didn't pluck out your hair.

You turned bald on your own.

Your head, your problem...

...then deal with it yourself.

I don't want any part of it.

I am leaving.
Do what you want to yourself

I am not going to help. Get lost.

"It will rain on you again."

"And you'll be blessed
with lushness again."

"It will rain on you again."

Hair transplant.

In a Hair transplant, we take
hair from other parts of your body...

...and plant it one by one on the
part where you don't have any hair.

You want this, don't you?

- Yes.
- You want new hair, don't you?

Yes...

The area from where we collect
the hair is called the donor area.

What is it called?

- Donor area.
- Right. Correct...

Mostly we collect hair from the back
of your head, your beard, chest, arm...

But you don't have enough
hair in these regions.

And whatever hair you have,
are pretty weak.

So?

There are two more donor areas.

One is armpit

He means under the arms, brother.

He's right.

And the other one...

Down there...

- What?
- Yes...

It will be very painful.

I know it will be painful...

...but the pubic hair is
always a couple of years younger.

Have you lost your mind?

I won't put pubic hair on my head.

Sit down.

Try to understand.

So what if its pubic hair,
it's still your hair.

Even shit we poop is also ours,
but we don't eat it.

Correct.

It will be a little curly,
but they will look nice.

Yaa curly hair is the latest trend.

This man's telling me
to put pubic hair on my head.

I am never going to do it.

But...

Under the belt in the first meeting?

Bala...

you must go to Lucknow for 2 months,
as a replacement.

Mr. Saxena from marketing is retiring.

Send someone more presentable.

Young and energetic.

Taunting your boss

Why won't you go?

Mom has a transplant...

...it's her knee.

And anyway, I still have a lot
of inventory work pending.

You're a pain in the neck.

I am...

A big pain in the neck.

"I am young even at 60..."

"...finally got engaged."

"No one to worry about in my family..."

"...Mom, uncle, or aunty."

"Youth jumped out the window..."

"...as old age knocked on the doors."

"I want to set those doors
and windows on fire..."

I am ready.

What for?

That thing you said.

What?

Using pubic hair on my head.

But won't it be painful for you?

He'll endure the pain.

The hair can be curly...

I'll straighten them.

Doctor, I am ready
to do anything it takes...

...just give me new hair.
I don't want to wear a wig.

Don't make me emotional.
I'll think of something.

Here... fill this form.

What was your name?

Bal Mukund Shukla.

Bal...seriously?

Write it down.

Where's the doctor?
Where's the doctor?

- What's the matter?
- Call the doctor out here.

- What's the matter?
- I've been robbed.

- I'll kill you. Let me go.
- Calm down. Calm down.

What's all the commotion?
What happened?

- What happened?
- Look at this...

Its bleeding, the wound's infected.

- Do you understand?
- See what he's done to me.

Don't believe him, he's a fraud.

Don't worry...there is one in
a million chance of this happening.

Allergies like this...

Diabetes patients are at higher risk.

You don't have diabetes, do you?
Fill up the form.

And you come with me.

What is this?

What is it? What... What...?

You should play that on the front foot.
It's coming full toss.

Come on...

Come on...

- I am not out yet...
- Give me the bat.

- I am not out yet, papa...
- Throw the ball.

- Fine, fine...
- Throw the ball.

Come on.

Throw one ball.

Throw him a good one.

- Out!
- Out!

- Out.
- You're out.

- The ball didn't connect with the bat.
- I took a catch.

You're out.

But the bat...

I'll hit you with this bat.

I'll swing this bat at you...

Take the bat.

I'll break your balls.

I'll show you.

What are you doing?
Are you crazy?

You think you'll hit me.

Why are you interfering?
This is not the IPL.

We're playing cricket and you're
turning this into a wrestling match.

Come here...

Better explain your friend...

I'll kill him.

Tell him...

Come inside.

Have you lost your mind?
Have you gone berserk?

Yes, I've gone berserk.

I've lost my mind.

Get lost, this is personal.

Don't get angry at him.
This is not his fault.

It's your fault.

This is all your doing.

If you don't defend
the ball you will get out.

Not the ball,
I am talking about my hair.

What about your hair
What is this?

This...

This bald patch...

This is your doing.

You've bad genes.

My genes are bad.

Look at mom...

she's got amazing hair.

Look at grandpa,
he's still got hair at this age.

He had hair until 5 years ago.

And look at me...

You gave this bald hair,
plus diabetes.

My hands shiver while
uploading pics on social media.

I get demoted at the job...
Flop in mimicry...

My childhood girlfriend dumps me.

Talking to a beautiful
girl scares the shit out of me.

Imagining that she will laugh at me.

I get proposals from weird girls.

And when I do get a decent proposal...

...she runs away screaming like
she's seen a ghost.

Even dog's make me envy.

I wear a cap before
wearing my underwear...

..because without it,
I feel naked.

At least you have a beard,
whereas I don't even get that.

My life's ruined because of you.

You won't talk to me like that.

I am your father. Understand.

Even Hrithik has a father,
and he's bald.

But he took care of his son's hair.

He's got such amazing hair...

...even his six fingers fall short
to brush through them.

Did you take care of your son?

Forget about me...

What did you achieve
in your life, papa?

Don't talk to me like that,
I am a Ranji player, son.

Go on... Go on... I am listening...

You played only one match
and got retired hurt for three runs!

Ranji...

You must be really happy today?

"As the saying goes,
keep trying till you succeed."

"Says who."

"Even after trying 210 methods..."

"...in the last two years..."

"Bala has finally given up."

Uppeji, get a glass of water.

Why are you shedding tears?

What else do you expect
when I've piled on so much weight?

- What...
- It's all my fault.

I've turned into a big fat cow.

I've put on 30 kilos, sister.

Every woman gains weight post-delivery.

That's natural.

That doesn't give your husband licence
to flirt around with other women.

Take my advice and divorce him.

No, sister...

why will I divorce him?

He's my true love.

Your true love's out
directing another love story...

...and you are justifying his perverse
with your overweight.

This is wrong.

Isn't self respect important as well.

And what is this?

I am fat, I've piled on weight...

Look at her...

Look at aunty.

She turned 54...

...but her confidence never wavered.

We've to be like her, Kusum.

Strong and confident.

Now leave...

Darling...

Give that to me...

Look...no need to divorce him.

He dumped you for your weight...

...and I got dumped for my moustache.

Take my advice and try dieting.

I read in a magazine recently,
about the new keto...

- ...and its really effective.
- Kusum, now go.

- Diet?...
- No. Please...

And call me later.

Come here.

Why are you giving such
stupid advice to my client?

Looks bad.

Okay, fine. Let's drop this topic.
Now fix your mood.

We're going to meet a guy...

Aunty, stop giving
so much importance to guys.

Why?
He's a working guy...

Has a job in Australia.

Because of your marriage at
least I'll get to see kangaroos once.

And you want me to marry
another kangaroo for that.

"Body like silver,
and hair like gold."

"You're the fortunate one..."

It's really hot this time.

You must be used to colder weather...
among the kangaroos.

"You're the fortunate one, among all."

"The rest are paupers."

"Body like silver,
and hair like gold."

- She is dark - What are you saying?
- "You're the only fortunate one..."

It's so hot...

...that everyone's getting a tan.

Look at him...
Even he's got tanned.

Stop it!

"Body like silver..."

It was really nice meeting you.

I'm waiting for you downstairs.

Bala.

There are free samples in
the inventory. Give that to Varun.

Okay, sir.

We're sending Varun to Lucknow.

Because you have a transplant
coming up, don't you?

Actually, it's my mom
who's getting a transplant.

You find enough time for mimicry...

...and save all the excuses for the job.

Huh...

Give the free samples to Varun.

Yes, sir.

Give the payment to Pari's mother
as soon as the shoot's over.

Otherwise, she won't stop calling.

Pari who?

It's our model of course.
Pari Mishra.

Is it Pari's ad shoot?

Yes, Pari's ad-shoot.

She has become a sensation on tiktok

The company wants to make
a new fairness cream ad.

And they want only her.
Tik-Tok girl.

"Oh my sweetheart."

"Take me to a place..."

"Oh my sweetheart."

What are you drinking?

Cold drink.

Give me some...

You're not supposed to...

You must have mixed it with
sugar deflecting solution.

Give it here

Good one.

Good one.

What is this?

Especially for you
all the way from Delhi.

For me?

It's a gift.

Why get a gift for me?

Must be an occasion.

First, open your gift.

What the...

It's your happy hair day.

Your father's gifting you hair, son.

I know...

you want real hair.

But in real life
reality is just fiction.

I admit...

maybe not like Hritik...

...but this is hair after all.

Go out for a few days.

People will believe...

They will think that
you got yourself treated.

Papa...

Sorry!

It's all right.

"...I made a comeback in Bala's life."

As an opportunity.

To make him a star again.

To get his imagination out of Tik-Tok...

...and to make it real.

Why do you look sad?

Did you have an argument
with the boss over allowance?

Allowance hardly matters.

I don't want to go to Lucknow.

I just managed to score with a girl.

If I lose out on her now,
I'll have to start all over again.

True...

Dude, scoring with a girl
in Kanpur is mission impossible.

Tell me about it.

Look at me...

My childhood girlfriend dumped me.

And I've been trying since then.

But still...think about it.

I've already made up my mind,
but who's going to bell the cat.

Me...

Your girlfriend's my girlfriend.

I'll go to Lucknow.

And you stay back in Kanpur.

But the other day you were saying
something about your mom's transplant...

I'll manage.

You'll go to Lucknow for me.

I will.

Don't lie to me.

Yes...

"Be blessed with lush hair"

"Be blessed with new hair."

"Blessed with wind in your hair..."

"Be hairy like never before"

"Hair is style, Hair is swag..."

"Hair gives you attitude..."

"From a boring guy..."

"Hair will make you a cool dude..."

"Hair is your mother, and your father..."

"Hair is your friend and companion"

"Soon you'll have adventures..."

"...which you never thought would happen"

"Hair is peace, hair is serenity."

"Hair is the end to your troubles."

"The magical powers to win over
a girl will come from hair"

"Be blessed with wavy hair..."

"Blessed with lush black hair"

"Blessed with long hair."

"Blessed with cool,
long, thick, black hair...."

'The fake hair had brought
real joy in Bala's life.'

'And dreams had come alive.'

Sister, don't get enough
likes on your pics...

...and parents can't sleep in peace.

Guys don't give second look...

...and you're always under pressure.

What to do, sis...

now you give me some tips?

A solution to get
rid of this darkness.

Remember the story of the king...

Everything he touched, turned to gold.

And I have a magic trick...

...which can make anyone fair.

Pretty You...

Made from herbal chemicals...

The real fairness trick.

Come...let me make you beautiful.

Cut it! Superb.

One more...

Make her look fairer.

"I've so many complains."

"Why come after so many days."

"What did you do all this while?

"What did you do?"

"Chanted your name."

"Thought about you."

"Chanted your name."

"Thought about you."

"Thought about you."
"Chanted your name."

Bala...

...you must have heard my name.

No, I haven't...

Then live one more life today...

See one more dream...

Get to know one more name...

Who knows...

there might
not be a tomorrow.

Pari...

You don't need an introduction.

Yeah...have we met before.

We've met on Tiktok so many times.

I've performed the audacity
of sharing your screen.

Oh yeah...

The video you did...

received many likes, you know...

We share an old bond.

What do you mean?

Whether awake or asleep,
you're all I talk about.

I carry you around all day,
keep you embraced in my arms.

Eww...

The only positive side being
on Pretty You's marketing team.

I see...so you're on Pretty
You's marketing team.

I would've quit long ago,
but you're the reason I am still here.

Show me your Tiktok.

Of course...

This is what we made, didn't we?

Meet my mom...

Mommy, this is Bala from Marketing.

Aunty, hello.

You must show me the pictures
before using it anywhere.

We won't compromise on the look.

Yes, of course...

I'll come down to your
house to take your approval.

Yes...

This one's my favorite.
You see when I smile...

What are you looking at?

Aunty is right.

Never compromise on looks.

You're pretty fast.

We met yesterday, and today
you're having tea with us at home.

And tomorrow I'll
take you to the park...

Why are you stuck in marketing?

You should have been an artist.

Really?

I would've become an artist long ago...

...but I couldn't find inspiration.

But I guess I am finding
my inspiration now.

Look.

As you said, aunty,
you wanted to see the pictures.

Here they are.

Perfect.

- They are nice, aren't they?
- Nice, nice.

- Did you bring the cheque?
- Here you go...

Your cheque

Now send your daughter with me.

What?

To the office...

- So we can complete the formalities.
- I see.

So this is your office.

The rumors were right then...

Kanpur boys cannot be trusted.

Kanpur boys are an
experience to be lived.

Where do you find the guts
to flirt so openly?

There's a little shop in Unnau...
Gattu Gut's shop.

I get mine from them.

Can't you ever be serious?

I am serious...

...baby.

Eww...baby?

I don't like it.

Sounds childish.

Then...

what should I call you?

Babu...

Eww... I don't like it.

That's my laundryman's name.

Then what?

Babyu will be, right?

Babyu?

Baby+Babu=Babyu

Babyu...

Babyu...

Babyu...

And it'll sound extra
cute in your sweet voice.

Babyu.

"Melodious voice..."

"Sweet melody."

"Innocent face."

"Sweet..."

"bewitching eyes."

"Fiery lips."

"You make my heart skip a beat."

"You must have read a lot of books."

"But have you ever read a face"

"I have sweetheart, I have."

"So what's written on my face."

"My body's beautiful."

"Love's on a fervor."

"I want to enchant you..."

"...with my beauty."

"Come take me in your arms."

"No, no, no..."

"Don't steal my heart..."

"Don't steal my heart..."

"Don't steal my heart..."

"I am crazy about you."

"I love you."

"I am crazy about you."

"I love you."

"I fear of separating from you."

"I love you."

"I am crazy about you."

"I love you."

You? What are you doing here?

Courier for you, ma'am.

Stop joking, come up.
You'll fall.

Careful...

Why didn't you come
through the front door?

Why the window?

Doors are masculine,
windows are feminine.

And since I am a romantic man,
I like only windows.

True.

But isn't this old school?

No, this is a tradition.

From Romeo to Murad,
everyone's done it.

So why won't I?

Murad?

"Gully Boy... My time will arrive."

Oh, yeah...I've seen it.

Do you know how
I feel when I am with you?

How?

Like you're a movie...

Every time we meet,
you make me laugh...

and make me feel nice.

But I am also scared...

that someday it might come to an end.

I am not some film, Babyu.

I am like a never-ending series.

You'll grow tired,
but I'll keep going on-and-on-and-on...

Well...

...you can come
inside if you like?

Seriously?

The room's masculine,
but the bedsheets feminine.

I never realized how
two months just swooped by.

Isn't it?

I must return to Kanpur tomorrow.

But I'll come every week to see you.

Promise?

Promise...

- Dinner's served, dear.
- Leave.

Go on, go have dinner.

Fine...

Now leave.

'With his new hair
and newfound confidence...'

'...Bala came like a brand new
Rolls Royce on the streets of Kanpur.'

He was no longer joke of the town...

...but the talk of the town.

Mummy Papa. Don't I look like a star?

- Bala?
- Bala, my son...you're back.

Bless you.

- Mom, look...
- Hello, aunty.

Hello, dear. God bless you.

Papa...

Hello, papa
- Hello.

Can you feel it?

Yes, yes, I can feel it.

He's a changed man now.

Even I am thinking of moving
to Lucknow after retirement.

That won't do you any good.

I am putting you back on Marketing.

Start with the presentations
and let your rocket soar.

Tell me the secret as well, brother.

For growing new hair,
my wedding is next month.

I don't tell this secret to anyone,
but for you, I'll make an exception.

Hold this.

The naïve population of our country...

...when they believe our politicians.

- Why wouldn't they believe Bala's miracle story.
- Give me.

Me too.

Have you lost your mind?

Everyone will get one.

Look...

Wow...so beautiful.

Help me out with this first.
With this Insta pic.

Wow...

That's her.

what's going on?

Look... take a look.

- What is it?
- His angel.

The nylon hair suits you.

Listen...

What do you think of Bala?

As***le

Me too.

But imagine...

an as***le like him scores
with such a gorgeous girl.

And that too the Pretty you model.

And look at you...

You don't like anyone.

Don't take advantage of this tender
moment to emotionally blackmail me.

I've seen this world
more than you, dear.

And all I know is that
the body has its own needs...

...which needs to be satisfied.

Yeah...

My-my, aunty...body's needs, huh!

Shameless...

Honestly speaking I believe...

I'll never see you getting married.

I'll be dead long before
you decide to marry.

Aunty...

you're like Thanos.

People will come and go,
but you'll be still here.

Who on earth is Thanos?

America's Superman.

Drop that topic...enough about America.

The kangaroo from Australia's been
texting you why don't you reply.

Stop snooping around my phone.

I will...

Body's needs

Why are you going back?

No, I...

What are you doing?

Pari..

You don't even kiss properly.

I needed some fresh air.

I drove all the way from Lucknow.

You spoiled the mood.

Now you only say something.

Actually, Pari,

I've been trying to tell you something
important for a long time now.

Yeah...tell me.

What if someday you
find out that I have a flaw?

That Cheapo Vani's
beau is the one with flaws.

Look here.

She sent me this selfie.

How is he?

"Baldy."

He looks fine.

You call this fine.

Yeah...

Our wedding selfie should be best.

Our wedding...

Yeah.

What?

Won't you marry me?

I will...of course I will.

Tell me...

I mean if you're just looking for fun...

Don't be ridiculous. I love you.

Then?

Why did your face
turn pale when I said our wedding?

You're so beautiful...

...I thought it'll take me a
couple of years before you say yes.

I thought that too.

So...

You see...

I am old enough to get married.

How much longer am I going to wait?

Mom-dad will grow desperate...

...and then force me
to marry some random guy.

So why don't we get
married before that?

Let's do it.

- Yeah?
- Yea...

- Yeah?
- Yea...

Babyu...
I love you, Babyu.

We'll get the best hair stylists
in Lucknow to help us prep.

And our hairstyle
will be the best, Babyu.

You see, at wedding functions
hair styling is everything.

"The wedding procession will arrive..."

"...bringing your destruction."

I want us to look like Virushka...

Ranveer-Deepika.

Our wedding pics
should go viral, Babyu.

We can compromise on the attire.

But what's the centre of attraction?

Hairstyling.

And remember what mom always says...

- Looks..
- Never, Compromise on looks.

I'll get the Ballerina hairstyle...

...and you'll get the long pompadour...

Long what?

Long pompadour style...

Look... It's like this...

Like Captain America.

It'll look amazing on you.

You'll look handsome in it.

"Bride's on her way..."

"...your secret shall be revealed."

"Careful, Bala."

"Bala learned the hard way
that liars never prosper...

"...he didn't know what to say."

"He was flabbergasted."

"Here it comes."

"Here it comes."

Why do you look nervous?

I've been trying to tell
you something for a long time now.

I know...

Know what?

That thing you want to tell me.

I can see it.

What can you see?

Your hesitation.

Chill dude, chill...

I know...

...my family's in a
slightly better position than you.

So what...

We aren't exactly millionaires.

I'll adjust.

You don't worry.

Yes, fine, but...

Is it my mom and dad...?

Mom and dad have
already said yes, Babyu.

And if they change their mind,
we'll run away and get married.

Our daughter is the
supermodel of Lucknow.

We've received many
esteemed proposals.

But she likes Bala...

Anyway...

The girls at Kanpur
must be heartbroken as well.

That's Bala you know, he's the best.

Most edible bachelor.

You must have an
air-conditioner at home.

Our daughter can't sleep without it.

If both the teams have come
to an understanding...

...do we understand
we've all come to terms.

Have you told her?

What's the meaning of this?

I almost told her.

What's the meaning of almost?

Huh...

Bala...think about it.

Are you sure you want to marry her?

Whether he marries her or anyone else...

...but he should tell her.

Have you lost your mind, brother?

Why tell her?

This is my wedding we're
talking about and not a joke.

I must tell her...

Of course, you must tell her.

But after the wedding.

But that's cheating.

Don't try to be oversmart.

Our society is a
male-dominant society...

...and this tradition's
been followed for many years.

Meaning?

Meaning...in our society, a guy's
flaws are not considered as flaws.

I used to get fits.

But did I tell your sister-in-law?

Look, there are dozens
of things about men...

...which the women find
out after the marriage.

Yeah...

And she doesn't exactly
have an option after the marriage.

How can I lie...

Even Yudhisthir lied once.

You're just an ordinary guy.

I don't think this is right...

Look...for no rhyme or reason...

...whatever I say is the law.

It's the least you got
to do if you want to marry her.

One day before the wedding,
I'll give you a diamond facial.

You're going to shine.

What are you typing?

Confession.

I don't have the guts to
say the truth, so I'm texting her.

To whom?

I am confessing my mistake
to your sister-in-law.

Look, brother Bala,
only three days left for the wedding.

Think before confessing.

Bala...

what are you writing?

Tell me.

I wrote...

"Babyu, I wanted to tell you this but
couldn't muster the courage to do so".

"I've no hair on my head.

I am bald."

"This hair is fake..."

"I am sorry for confessing so late,
but I didn't want to lose you."

"If you've forgiven me, then call
back otherwise I'll take a hint."

Are you high?

- Delete it.
- I am sending it.

Bala...for the sake of whatever
hair's left, don't send it.

- I'm going to send it right now.
- You can't send it.

Brother said...

Don't you want to get married...

It's sent.

You ruined everything.

I dyed my hair hot-pink
for the wedding. See...

Finally, you found a hottie like her...
I mean sister-in-law.

You can kiss the wedding goodbye now.

Confession. Are you a Christian?

Thank God you didn't get a tattoo...

Otherwise getting it
off would've been extra.

Pacing around won't help.

Even God couldn't have found
a beautiful girl like her for you.

Hello.

Bala...

Sorry, I couldn't reply.
I am busy with the rituals.

You mean you don't have a problem.

I knew you will call me back.

I knew my love was true.

I knew you will accept
me the way I am.

Yeah...I like the way you are.

Can you do one thing...

Can you install an AC in the bedroom?

I'll put a dozen ACs in the room.

I love you, Babyu.

I love you, Babyu.

I love you.

What did she say?

Did she say yes?

With this bald head...

Yes, she did... She said
yes accepting all kinds of bald...

Brother Bala...

On the occasion of Bala's wedding...

...here's a special number
from Soni Band.

"Tequilla."

"Tequilla."

"It's a day of joy..."

"...feeling on the top."

"We're gonna mix soda, water,
lime and drink what."

"Tequilla."

"Son has taken the plunge,
Tomorrow he'll become a father"

"With your fathers money
What will you drink now."

"Tequilla."

Hello.

Hello.

Can we meet now?

"Get in the groove."

"Take a shot."

"Or I'll give you a tight slap."

"Tequilla."

Brother Bala...

"Tequilla."

Brother Bala...

What did you send me?

Take a look.

Let's talk later.

Take a look. Please...

I don't get it...

You won't listen, will you...

"Say something...
Who did you chose?"

"Where do you think you're going
leaving your friends alone."

- Brother Bala, shall I delete it?
- "This happiness..."

"...doesn't last for too long."

"You're smiling today,
but soon you'll be in tears."

"Time will tell..."

"...what will be the result."

"Whether your marriage is hit or flop."

"Tequilla."

"Tequilla."

"Tequilla."

- Thank you
- You're welcome

By the way, you're looking beautiful.

Thank you.

Actually Thanks for coming.

I thought you wouldn't come.

Sorry for all those messages.

But first of all, I want to
apologize for what happened the other day.

Mom was wrong.

She shouldn't have said that.

But it's a misunderstanding.

Rohan, my ears are
extra-sensitive to the word dark.

I can hear it from a distance of 50 ft..

But mom's not like that at all.

She was under a different
impression about you.

First she...

She saw the wedding pics,
then the Insta pics...

I don't know what
you're trying to say.

I am not on Instagram...

Your profile...

If I was in your place even
I would've reacted in the same way.

The other day I thought these
things don't matter to you.

But after seeing your insta pics...

...we were a little confused.

Babyu...

Let's make a Tiktok
of our wedding night.

Coming.

What are you doing?

Come on, Babyu.
What's taking you so long?

Coming...

I am sleeping.

What are you doing?

Babyu...

Come na

My heart...beats for you.

Babyu...

I was about to tell you.

You really thought I wouldn't
know if you don't tell me.

I already knew.

You look hotter this way.

Come here, Babyu.

Latika....come in.

You left without having
dinner last night.

Where is Bala?

- Do you need anything?
- Please call him, aunty.

It was his wedding night yesterday.

Who wakes up early
the following morning?

Bala!

- Bala! Bala!
- Why are you screaming?

You?

Come down.

Come down.

Why are you fuming?
Latika...

- Don't go up there.
- What's happening?

- What's going on?
- Who do you think you are?

Who do you think you are?

- Will you tell me what happened?
- What is this?

- What is this?
- What is it?

- Stop making a scene, let's go downstairs.
- I am making a scene.

What is she talking about?

Stop misbehaving with me.

Why did you do it?

You're looking nice.
What's wrong in it?

Who are you to decide whether
I am looking nice or not?

Who are you?

I am no one...

But your aunt forced me to do this.
Why would I do it?

Ohh...

Because Bala's a little kid,
he'll do as aunty tells him to do.

No...

But whatever I did was
for your own good, Latika.

Let me decide what's
good and what's not for me.

You have a problem with your baldness...

...then you can hide your
bald patch with this fake hair.

I don't have a problem
with my complexion, Bala.

I don't need this fake whiteness...

If you try to interfere
in my life again...

...then I'll beat the
remaining hair out too.

- Latika...
- Stupid moron...

How dare she talk to Bala like this?

Talk to her Indira
What is the meaning of this...

What did you do?

What did you do?

What did she say?

What was she saying?

Nothing...

She...

She's my childhood friend.
We often squabble like this.

What was she saying?

Show me.

Listen to me...

Let me explain, Babyu...

Show me!

Listen to me.

You are bald.

My husband is bald.

My husband is bald.

My husband is bald!

My husband...

My husband is bald!

My husband is bald!

My husband is bald!

My husband is bald!

My husband is bald!

Why are you over acting?

It's worse than Vani's husband.

Calm down and listen...

Let's talk...

I don't want to talk.

- Babyu...
- My husband is bald!

Babyu, why did you close the door?

Babyu, why did you close the door?

Open the door.

I love you.

You asked for an AC,
and I got it for you.

Babyu, open the door.

I texted you and said that I am bald.

But it got sent to someone else.

How is it my fault? Tell me...
I had lost my mind.

Babyu, don't do something
stupid behind closed doors.

Babyu, please...don't commit suicide.

Please...I apologize.
I am sorry.

Babyu, I am sorry.
Please open the door.

Babyu...

Where are you taking the bag?

Keep it...
Leave...

No no

Let go.

This is a new bag.
You'll ruin it.

Let it be.

Don't do it.

Don't go, please don't go.

Pari.

How can you leave
for such a small thing?

Pari!

Let go. I said let go.

Pari...

Go on.

Babyu...

Babyu...

Pari.

Pari.

'When your bride leaves,
you lose your reputation.'

Son... Bless you.

What's wrong?

- You guys fought on the first day?
- Where is Pari?

She's upstairs in her room.
She didn't tell us a thing.

- Okay...
- She isn't talking to us.

Why don't you tell
us if something's wrong?

We'll explain to her.

Why don't you explain to him?
I am sure he's responsible.

There's nothing to explain Pari.

Explain what?

Ask him.

Are you having an affair on the side?

Stop testing me...
I am already quite stressed.

Let me go.

But son...

Take the helmet off first.

How can you leave
home like this, Babyu?

Sorry...

I tried to tell you about it...

It was on the tip of my tongue,
but I couldn't tell you.

Have you ever imagined why...

I didn't want to lose you.

I was very insecure about you.

I even sent you a text
but it got sent to someone else.

It's not my fault.

Whatever. Leave it.

How can I just leave it?

Be a good Babyu and let's go home.

- I don't want to be with you.
- Why not?

What have I done?

Loot or plundered?
Am I a terrorist?

I just have less hair...

Less...

Less...

You have no hair...

Its all about style...

Even Rajnikant is bald.

Don't force the issue.

I'll wear a wig.
I look so much better...

- No one will know...
- But I know, what about that?

You're making a fuss
over a little thing.

Maybe for you, but not for me

Looks matter for me.
Why don't you get it?

I never scored more
than 45% in my studies.

But all the guys
used to hover around me.

Why?

Because I was good looking.

I got attention all my life. Why?

Because I am good looking.

I got some modelling assignments,
fame, my hoardings were all over...

Why?

Because I am good looking.

I get 500 comments for every post...

...and 499 out of them
say looking good.

That's all that matters in my life.

Looking good.

So when the only thing I ever
wanted was a good looking hubby...

...then was I wrong?

It might be a stupid criteria for
you, but that's all there is for me.

Looking good.

So what should I do?

Go away.

I'll wait for you.

If you get bitten by a dog,
you got to take 14 injections.

But if your own dog bites you...

...then you need 28.

Bala was bitten by his own mentality.

'I feel you're like a film...'

'Whenever we meet,
you make me laugh...'

'...and feel very good.'

'But I am scared that someday
this film will come to an end.'

I feel really lucky, Manju.

Even I was bald.

But you never walked out on me.

She is my daughter.

And she's not a deserter.

Now, do you know why
I stayed back for 30 years?

Goodnight.

Bala, you didn't invite
us to the wedding...

...but at least invite
us over for home cooked dinner by bhabhi

She's gone home to Lucknow.

Some rituals are still
pending on their side.

I'll invite you over once she's back.

"Love is what it was."

"And still is."

"And shall always remain."

"You were mine..."

"And still are."

"And shall always be mine."

"Whether you know or you don't..."

"Whether you don't believe me."

"Whether you know or you don't..."

"Whether you don't believe me."

"But someday you'll say this too."

Let it rip, dude.
- Coming...

Here it comes. Here it comes...
- "Your love will stay..."

- More feelings...
- "...in my heart as pain"

Emotion... Emotion...

"My pain shall stay with you
forever as love"

Once Jaya ma'am gets upset
with Bachchan sir and leaves.

Bachchan sir says in his own style...

Let's go, Let's go...
Let's go to Manali...Kulu..

That's the place to be,
instead of home.

And it was exactly
the opposite with Shahrukh...

He got upset with sister-in-law
Gauri and walked out, saying...

No, no, no, I don't feel pain.

I'll never come back here again.

But I will whenever I miss Pari...

I'll never come back.

But I will whenever I miss Pari...

Whenever I will find myself alone...

Thank you.

"The hurt I got... still hurts."

"It will always hurt."

"You're mine..."

"And still are."

Bala...

Are you thinking of jumping?

I was waiting for you to come by...

You've brought me this far,
now you just need to push.

Stop bickering like a teenager?

What are you doing here?

I am feeling guilty for the other day...

...and I came to say sorry.

You came to say sorry...

Really?

Please apologize, ma'am.

Please...say it.

Sorry.

Apology not accepted! Get lost!

A daughter in law is like an open weapon.

She shouldn't stay out of
the house for so long.

It's been really long since she left.

When is she coming back?

What are you doing, son?

What is that form?

It's for hair transplant.

I've decided to go
for a hair transplant.

But you have diabetes.

I know...I know all the risks.

But I have decided
to go under the knife.

If you've decided to put your head under
the knife, then where will you grow hair.

- On your hand.
- I don't need your advice.

All I am trying to say is you don't
have to get into these stupid hassles.

That toupe on your head
is a much better solution.

You're being a wise guy because
you still have hair on your head.

I know all this seems
like a joke to you...

...but remember, I was your
age when I started to lose hair.

I knew it. I knew it, brother.

- Knew what?
- That you're jealous of me.

I...am jealous of you?

You're jealous of me, my hair.

Jealousy is not good
for health, brother. Don't forget.

And stop staring at my
hair with your greedy eyes.

It's because of you I lost
four strands of hair yesterday.

I've kept them safe.
Take a look for yourself.

And if I lose one more strand of hair,
then you've had it.

I'll show you...
What's wrong with you?

I swear if you...

Come here, son.

There is no escape from me.

I can't even eat my food peacefully.
- I'll tell you.

Break each other's head.

Let him go. He's your brother.

Finish this once for all.

Idiots

Stop!

Take a look at this.

What is it?

What is it?

What...

What is it?
Is someone going to tell me?

She's charged you with fraud.

She claims that you cheated
her into this marriage...

...so this marriage should
be deemed null and void.

Null and void.

Plus she's also claimed
a million in damages.

You wanted to apologize,
didn't you?

Now defend my case.

You think you're some big-shot lawyer,
don't you?

I don't think I am...
I know I am.

Then defend my case...

Do it.

I don't want to defend your case

You're a big pain in the neck.

I don't have an option.

Because I cannot trust another lawyer.

Why?

Because my baldness ...

Because she left me for my baldness.

If I tell some other lawyer,

and the news will get
leaked all over the city.

I'll be humiliated.

I can endure everything, but I
can't tolerate anyone laughing on me.

Please take my case... Please...

Look Balmukund, you have cheated her.

Why didn't you tell
her that you're bald?

I did...
In fact, I even texted her.

But it got sent to someone else.
Went to Babu Presswala

Sheer case of misunderstanding.

You sent the text to Babu...

Life's already screwed me,
and you think its funny.

Look, on a very serious note...

...you could've told her about
your situation at any point in time...

I would...

I would've have told her this fact in my
way if you hadn't messed up everything.

And I would've kept her happy forever.

Please take my case.

Often I wonder how joyful life would be..

... if could spend it relaxing
my head on your lap

She sent me a notice.

Smile my friend. Smile...

When you laugh your sorrows away,

then joys will be worth the wait.

Destiny will be your slave,

and you'll be the
king of your destiny.

No...

No isn't just a word,
but a complete sentence.

And starting today,
you won't meet Pari,

or think about her.

Yeah...

Yeah...

Yeah...

Yeah...

"What a pretty way
to reward my love..."

Your love...

"My own love robbed
me of my happiness."

Sonu Nigam. Sonu Nigam.

- Good singer.
- "My love's..."

Brother Bala.

What?

Your picture's on the paper.

My picture?

Yes...

There's one here too.

This one...and this one...

Wife dumps husband
for his bald patch...

Files a cheating case...

"News has come."

"You won't be able
to save your honour."

Now Bala had two hands...

And the population
of Kanpur was 4 million.

Poor guy couldn't stop his life
from going spiral...

...and his news going viral.

He got dumped by his
wife and you think its funny.

You think it's funny, huh...
I won't cut your hair.

All the scams in the world
and they think this is funny.

You used to hang out with him,
didn't you?

Read it.

She has also filed a case in order to
get the marriage declared null and void.

Now how did this news get
to the newspapers...

...is what I don't know either.

What is the poor guy going to do now?

Bala.

Bala, come out.
Come out. Come out.

What is it?

Where is our beloved leader?

He's not at home.
He's gone out.

He must be visiting the guy...

...who grew hair on
his head with bull's semen.

Come down if you have the guts.

"Dumped by his wife."

"He turned out to be bald."

"He turned out to be a liar."

"All his claims were false..."

"...he had no hair on his head."

"Show your face, Bala..."

"...so we can turn your face black."

- Let me do it, brother Bala.
- I can do it. I can do it.

- Let me do it...
- I said I'll do it.

Get lost.

Eat.

Aunty taught me a
lesson when I was a kid...

Listen carefully...

Why did you do it in the first place?
Why pine?

When you plant a tree of cactus,

how can you expect mangoes?

The saying goes
rubbing salt on wounds...

...but you rub every condiment you can.

I am going.

The hearing is coming closer, Bala.

To hell with the case.

I don't want to embarrass
myself in the court again.

Why?

Because I have rotten luck.

So you don't want to defend this case?

No...

Fine.

I don't care.

If you don't defend yourself, then it
will be proof that you cheated Pari.

But who's going to
marry you after that?

Have you ever thought of that?

But anyway...

The entire state depends on God...

...I am sure you can too.

I am already so depressed
and you're having fun as well.

Why do you always get so melodramatic?

What's the big deal
if people found out?

You...

You will never understand

I won't understand...

You've been going through this
phase for only a couple of years...

...but I've faced this my entire life.

The complex about my looks...

Comments on my skin tone...

Embarrassment...suffocation...
I've been through it all.

And you were among them too.

When a 10-year-old
girl is called dark...

...you won't understand the
mental trauma she goes through.

And you say I won't understand...

Stupid.

Sorry.

I will defend this case.

These stupid things are
not allowed in my office.

Sorry, ...forgive me, O warrior queen.
But this is my job.

I know...

You have a respectable job of
demoralizing girls with dark skin tone.

Where do you bring
this over-activism from?

Enough...

I am going to write
your statement today...

...so I'm entitled to ask
you a few personal questions.

And answer me correctly
without feeling embarrassed.

I never lie.

I know how truth-loving
you really are.

Question no. 1

What happened between the two of you?

Well...love...proposal...
then marriage.

Anything else...

Anything else?

Anything else...

What?

I am asking did you
ever have sex with her?

We didn't have sex...

I mean we had a little... Well...

How do I explain in detail?

But why are you interested
in my love life?

Why would I be interested
in your love life...

Don't try to be over-smart.

I am asking because
her family can make a claim...

...that you married her only
for a physical relationship.

Pari can never do such a thing.

Why?

She loves me,
and she will come back to me.

How?

Let me show you.
She liked my video. See...

"Your name's etched on my heart."

"Your name's etched on my heart."

"Filled with your love and care."

"Your name's etched on my heart."

What on earth is this?

What on earth is this?

My true feeling.

"Your name's etched on my heart."

The papers are here, sign them.

Look dear,
think before signing these papers.

Is this necessary?

Leaving your husband
over such a trivial thing.

Trivial...

He has cheated us.

I am talking to her.

Pari...
Look at me.

- Put that down.
- Return my phone.

This thing's ruined your life.

I've already said that
I don't want to live with him.

And I don't want any money either.

Now return my phone.

So...did you spend on anything
else at the wedding?

Isn't this enough?

Why would it matter to me?

He's your son.
You can spend as much as you like...

No, we didn't spend on anything else.

Except for little things like booze...

Where is Bala?

Why?

What do you want from him now?

I am his Lawyer.
I've got to do my job.

She isn't complaining either.

He's upstairs. Go on.

Your room's nicely decorated.

You've still kept all the photos.

Aunty says there's one moment
in our life that's very close to us...

...and we want to live it
over and over again.

This is...that part of your life,
isn't it?

Yes.

Are you coming to the school reunion?

No...

Why?

I feel bored.

Bored...

Bored or embarrassed.

Why would I be embarrassed?

You were the star of our school.

And now your image's shattered.

Enough of this nonsense...

Let's discuss the case.

If you don't come,
then I won't defend your case.

Why?

Come on, you'll have fun.

And don't worry...

No one cares about
your personal problems.

Tell me one thing...

who looks the same
throughout his life...

Why don't you accept yourself?

You look good the way you are.

I am going to take a case of this KESA

It's been more than four hours
and still no sign of electricity.

I am going to file a PIL against them.

Wait and watch.

And unfortunately,

I got the name Kubja.

Everyone shunned me.

Come Kubja, let me make you beautiful.

Why did Krishna have
to make Kubja beautiful?

Someone could have liked
her the way she was.

Nonsense...

When God has set the wrong precedent,
why blame humans.

I knew it...

...someday you will wage war on God.

You will not understand.

Come on.

"As my heart..."

"...struck a bell."

"All those memories came back to me."

"All those tales..."

"...which I want to keep..."

"...etched in my memory forever."

"As you walk me..."

"...down that same lane."

"I want to stay for a while."

"I am waiting, o Life."

"Hold my hand and guide me."

- Hi, Rishab.
- Great...

Sir, recognize me.

Bala.

Bala.

How are you, son?

Doing great, sir.

Actually,
I wanted to apologize to you.

Remember, someone drew a sketch of you
on this blackboard and called you baldy...

...and humiliated you.

That was me, sir.

I knew it was you.

See...

I made this myself for you guys.

Sir.

Come on, let's take a picture.
Everyone sit in your place.

"I was a little disillusioned."

"And also a little cheeky."

"Every mischief followed by another."

"All those whom I troubled."

"Were right before me."

"Those friends were my real treasures."

"I want to face them..."

"...and take a good eyeful."

"The moments that I lived back then."

"Even if you trouble me..."

"I forgive you, O life."

"Here I go again, O life..."

"... To be happy again."

According to the Hindu Marriage Act,
1955 Marriage is a sacrament.

Marriage is a holy bond.
It's a belief.

How can a marriage based
on the foundation of a lie...

...be considered as
a marriage in any aspect.

It's just fraud.

Is it fair to annul a marriage
on the grounds of baldness?

Let Pari Mishra decide
whether it's fair or not.

She feels cheated.

Okay then...

I want to ask
Pari Mishra some questions.

Go ahead.

Did you marry Balmukund only
for his hair?

No.

Then why did you marry him?

He is charming...

Was...

He was a good comic.

He had a good sense of humor.

You wanted to pursue
a career in modelling.

Right?

Yes.

What was Balmukund's stand?

He said he'll support me in my career.

Did he ever abuse, misbehave,
or resort to any sort of violence,

physical or verbal, with you?

Never.

You see, ma'am.

Pari married Balmukund
for his good heart and decent behavior

and not his hair.

Fine... agreed.
Agreed... Agreed...

Let's agree that he
was a very nice person.

But if he was such a nice person...

...then he could've told her
about this mop on the head.

Why didn't he?

Balmukund, please take off
the patch you're wearing on your head.

Take it off.

I said take it off.

Please take it off so we can bring
the real matter of this case in light.

We never agreed on this.

Just do as I say...take it off.

Remove it, trust me.. remove it.

Stop.

Stop.

It's okay.

Did you notice his hesitation?

The embarrassment, the humiliation...

...which every stout, scrawny,
tall, short, bald,

and dark-skinned person
goes through every day.

Because they are made
to realize this every day.

Balmukund hid this fact
from Pari for this embarrassment.

And not his intentions to cheat Pari.

I think you've taken
this matter rather personally.

What do you mean?

What do you mean by
I've taken this personally?

What is he trying to imply, ma'am?

Is he trying to say that
I took this case personally

because I am dark-skinned?

Is this what this man is saying?

Please, I never said such a thing.

That's exactly what you
said and it is not acceptable.

This is a sexist and a racist
remark in the court of law.

Calm down.

This is an insult of a female
lawyer and this will not be tolerated.

Please tell this man to apologize.

Mr. Raina, what is this...

Okay, sorry...sorry, I apologize.

It's not about you or me.

Nor is this case about
body shaming or embarrassment.

This case is about a woman's rights.

A woman will be seeing this
face for the rest of her life...

...so doesn't she have the
right to decide how he should look.

If Balmukund hid the fact of
his baldness and married Pari Mishra...

...then our Constitution...

...gives Pari Mishra the right
to refuse to accept this marriage.

Look at him.

Balmukund Shukla.

He has many qualities.

Like Pari just told us.

He is sensitive, he's emotional, he's
caring, he's decent, he's a nice man.

But if you can't see
his goodness and qualities...

...and just a patch of hair, then you
need a doctor and not a lawyer.

Wow...what a statement.

Order. Order.

Madam...

I won't tolerate gimmicky here.

Your honour, I want to
ask Pari Mishra's last remark.

I saw a mirror in Bala's
bathroom which was half-covered.

So when he can't stand
watching his own bald head...

...then how does he expect me to
do the same for the rest of my life.

Is it fair?

- Ma'am...
- It is not fair.

Bala...

It's not fair, Latika.
Not fair at all.

I should have told her.

And not before the wedding...

...in fact, I should have told her
when we fell in love.

But I couldn't say it.

I could never muster the courage.

I did make a mistake.

Forgive me.

Pari, if you don't
accept this marriage, then...

...I request you to annul it.

Bala, why...

I can't force her to love me.

The court has heard the arguments
from both the parties...

...and respects Pari Mishra's personal
opinion and annuls this marriage.

This marriage shall
be considered null and void.

We've won the case.
Time to celebrate.

- Congratulations, sir.
- Pari...

I want to apologize.

All the best for your future.

And this time,
find someone with that long pompa...

Long Pompadour

Yes...

...find someone with
that kind of hairstyle.

And this time make
sure by pulling his hair.

Okay...

Bye.

What are we selling?

Tell me...

Rahul.

Bala, you tell us.

Fairness cream.

No.

We're selling water
cooler in the desert.

Heater on the Himalaya.

Booze in Bihar.

Fresh air in Delhi.

We're selling beauty
to this ugly country.

For only 15 rupees.

15 rupees?

Even lemonade is more expensive.

And we're selling beauty at this rate.

What else does one want?

So my brave soldiers of beauty...

Go now and make all the dark

and wheatish tone females
in this state realize their ugliness.

Go... Get under their skin.

"Give me more sale..."

"Stick it. Stick it. "

"Give me more sale..."

"Stick it. Stick it. "

"Give me more sale..."

"Stick it. Stick it. "

Go and stick it then.

Fair. Fair. Fair.

Meaning... who is fair is beautiful.

Caste, education, doesn't matter.

Except for one thing.
Fair girls only.

This is an ideology of society.

You cannot change this ideology,

but you can change
the colour of your skin.

Buy Pretty You!

Bala...

Get fairer skin in 5 weeks.

Go on...

You cannot change this ideology,

but you can change
the colour of your skin.

But why change it?

Why change it?

Why change ourselves?

Why not?

Exactly, why change ourselves?

Why change?

Why change ourselves?

We won't change.

Sir why do we need to change?

What did you do?

You said stick it, stick it.
So I stuck it, sir.

Proud of you, brother Bala.

Hold this. See you later.

So finally Bala renounced me...

...like Gautam Buddha renounced the world.

Bala...

Let it be.

Vihaan's been selected
for Ranji Trophy.

Ranji huh, bro...

You'll play for the country someday.

Let it roll.

It's an auspicious date, you know...

This is really good.

We'll get these two
married on that date.

Who are you?

Bala.

What have you done?

We're getting Latika
and Rohan engaged.

Good, you're here.

This is Bala.
He lives in the same neighborhood.

Sit, son.

Come come sit.

You never told me that Rohan
and you were having an affair.

Your marriage was on
the verge of breaking...

...so I didn't think
it was right to tell you.

It seemed awkward.

But what are you doing here?

You know what I am doing here.

I've come to propose.

Yes...

I couldn't muster the courage
because of my fake hair and the job

But now I've quit.

And finally got the
confidence to propose to you.

Please reconsider.

Seriously, Bala.

Get up.

What is this? A film?

Did you really think you would come down
here and propose to me on my engagement...

...and I'll go with you.

He loves me.

Even I have started loving you.

Bala, I am your rebound
and not your love.

Please understand.

You never had feelings for me.

Maybe I did...

but now I have those feelings for Rohan.

So there's no chance
for a dramatic climax.

Not even this much?

Not even this much...

S*** man.

"Trouble me all you want."

"But I forgive you."

"Here I go again..."

"To be happy again."

This look suits you.

Looking nice.

Thank you.

I mean it.

For showing me the mirror.

Because the mirror
in my room is half covered.

I could never see myself.

But now I have.

That's a good thing.

Are you going to make
us laugh today or not, Bala?

Friends, I didn't come here to mimic
Shahrukh Khan, Aamir Khan, or Bachchan sir.

I am someone else today.

The one on this mic is Bala...

Because you've seen Bala in this hair.

So you'll ask if this is Bala,
then who am I?

So I am Bal (Hair).

Doesn't it look like the Clean
India Campaign started from here?

Rupan...what's so funny?

Look at him.

If anything is under more
pressure than Virat Kohli,

then that's his shirt's button.

I bumped into him in
the market the other day.

He was wearing his wife's slippers.

I said, how did this happen?

He said I can't see what I am
wearing on the other side of my stomach...

And that's Nandkishore aka Nandu.

Kanpur's black panther.

If you throw an ice cube at him,
it will turn into cola.

Many years ago Nandu went to Mumbai...

...and the place where he
lived is known as Andheri now.

And that's Jaggi...

Raise your hands,
we can hardly see you.

He's so short,
that he's never seen an adult film.

The guys at the movies drive him
away saying this film isn't for kids.

Just like he's fat,
he's dark, he's short...

Similarly, Bala is bald.

Bala lost his hair before
he could lose his virginity.

Bala is so bald that people sometimes
mistake his bald patch for the full moon.

Then I realized that
your lost love can come back,

even the government can come back...

...but hair once gone
can never come back.

Go ahead, laugh...

It's necessary to laugh at this fat,
scrawny, short people...

...because our tradition says so.

So go ahead and laugh.

Because I won't feel offended anymore.

Because I am going to laugh with you.

I won't try to change myself.

Why change?
Why change ourselves?

Whether you accept me or not,
but I've accepted the way I am.

Back in school, I did a play where

Lord Krishna turns ugly
Kubja into someone beautiful

But today I finally understood that story.

Krishna didn't make Kubja beautiful...

In fact, he only made
her realize her beauty.

And the day you realize
that you'll be the

most beautiful person in the world.

Whether you're fat, scrawny, short,
bald, or whatever you look like.

If you love yourself,
the world will love you.

Bravo. Bravo. Bravo.

Come fall in love...

with yourself.

"Trouble me all you want."

"I forgive all your mistakes, O Life."

"Take me in your arms, o Life."

"Take me in your arms, o Life."

"You just wanna."

"Listen..."

"I am a little crazy, do what I think."

"Play a song that's funky."

"Not the heart, nor the wealth."

"This is about your body."

"I go crazy when you're in front of me."

"You're not tall, dark, or handsome,
still you're in my heart."

"Your heart's driving me out of control."

"I like the way you are."

"I just wanna..."

"Feel your body."

"Touch my body."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Touch my body."

"I wanna feel your body."

"Touch my body."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Touch my body."

"Fly my honey..."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Fly my honey..."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Listen..."

"I am a little crazy, do what I think."

"Play a song that's funky."

"Not the heart, nor the wealth."

"This is about your body."

"You speak from your eyes."

"You try to be naughty with me."

"I get restless when I don't see you."

"I never get tired of looking at you."

"The night's getting naughty..."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"I wanna feel your body."

"Touch my body."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Touch my body."

"I wanna feel your body."

"Touch my body."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Touch my body."

"Fly my honey..."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"Fly my honey..."

"Don't be shy my honey."

"As my heart..."

"...struck a bell."

"All those memories came back to me."

"All those tales..."

"...which I want to keep..."

"...etched in my memory forever."

"As you walk me..."

"...down that same lane."

"I want to stay for a while."

"I am waiting, o Life."

"Hold my hand and guide me."

"I was a little disillusioned."

"And also a little cheeky."

"Every mischief followed by another."

"All those whom I troubled."

"Were right before me."

"Those friends were my real treasures."

"I want to face them..."

"...and take a good eyeful."

"The moments that I lived back then."