Bad Boys II (2003) - full transcript

Narcotics cops Mike Lowrey (Will Smith) and Marcus Burnett (Martin Lawrence) head up a task force investigating the flow of ecstasy into Miami. Their search leads to a dangerous kingpin Johnny Tapia (Jordi Mollà), whose plan to control the city's drug traffic has touched off an underground war. Meanwhile, things get sexy between Mike and Syd (Gabrielle Union), Marcus's sister.


Ja, all this is under control.

$150 million,

and my dope is on the way.

Today is gonna be a good day.

We are 25 degrees north,

84 degrees west.

The cargo's being dropped.






Do you want to see his gun?


Bang. Bang.


Sorry, Johnny.

Fucking bitches.

Infrared's picking up a live one

on the water.

This is Air Force

Stallion C-14 to Coast Guard.

We're picking up

a fast-moving contact

heading 3-5-0

toward South Florida.

Captain, Air Force Stallion

has a contact at 1-8-0

closing fast.

This is Coast Guard

cutter Valiant.

Request to know your intentions

at this time.

Vessel off our port bow,

this is U.S. Coast Guard.

Intercept is 1-8-0,

speed 17 knots.

Make it so, chief.

Scramble the helo.

Vessel off our port bow,

vessel off our port bow.

This is U.S. Coast Guard,

U.S. Coast Guard.

Request to know your intentions

at this time.


Valiant, Valiant, Valiant,

This is Coast Guard 6-0-0-3.

Negative contact with target.


Captain, we've lost target.

Here's your delivery

and payment.

Is it done?

Cargo is on Dixie 7.


All right, TNT,

for the millionth time,

listen up.

Since 9-11, we've gone hi-tech

over the water,

so the dope runners

have gone low.

Our source says

the biggest X shipment on record

is coming in tonight,

and we want to know

who's behind it.

Hopefully in a few hours,

we'll have our answer.

We're going to hit them

from three directions:

We're going with a water team,

vehicle assault,

and we got guys on foot.

We cannot make a move

until our UCs

have ID'd the drugs

and called us in.

No call, we back away.

And these guys

we're going after,

they got a lot of firepower,

and they hate the law,

so eyes open out there.

Bravo's on the move.

Heads up. Here comes the drop.

Fuck. My lens is flaring.

I can't see shit.

Brothers! Gather 'round!


Why didn't you tell me

there was a rally tonight?

Who's looking?

Take that shit.

I'm out of here.


White power!

White power!

White power!

White power!

Blue power, motherfuckers.

Miami PD.

Aw, damn. It's the Negroes.

Casper, drop the bag.

Alpha leader,

bring them in.

♪ Bad boys, bad boys

What you gonna do? ♪

♪ What you gonna do

When we come for you? ♪

♪ ...nax mez nose na-hey ♪

Dude, you gotta learn the words.

We usually only do the chorus.

Alpha leader, hit it. Br...

Repeat your transmission.

Alpha leader to Bravo Four,

please continue relay.

Where's backup?

Alpha leader,

bring them in.

Hit it.

Mike, I'm only getting static.

All I'm getting is static.

These radios are fucked.

Something funny? Something


Mike, where are they?

Got you, nigger.



Looks like we got us

a situation here.

You ain't gonna

shoot, nigger.

Just 'cause you got that gun

to my partner's head,

you're thinking I ain't gonna

splatter your shit all over?

That's what I'm thinking.

See, what you don't understand

is my partner came here tonight

prepared to die.

Hell...Hell, no!

Incinerating trash like you.

Ready to die,

ain't you, Marcus?

The fuck I want to do that for?

Scared, ain't you, boy?

A, You can

put that gun down,

tell me who's bringing

this shit in,

and maybe I'll just

pop one in your shoulder,

or B, you can keep acting

all Brody,

and I'm going to plant one

in your chest...

Or C, you know, take the time

to talk a minute...

you know,

de-escalate the situation.

You see, that's some

new spiritual bullshit

my partner's on.


I actually prefer

shooting motherfuckers.

A lot of movement going on.

Can't see the UCs.

I think something's

going down.

Don't move yet.

Mike, the man

has a gun to my head.

I bet he'll put it down

if I put a hollow point

in his eye.

Your partner's

a cocky nigger.

Damn. Now, was that necessary,



How come he can't just be a cop?

He got to be a nigga too?

I'm gonna go ahead

and hot this fool.

Mike, look, calm down.

Calm down? I'm calm.

I'm calm! Hey! Whoa! Whoa!

I am way too unstable

for that bullshit.

Stop all the goddamn


Everybody stop moving!

We can't let you all go,

but look, this shit'll

get worked out in court.

We got our rights.

Why don't you

exercise your right

to shut the fuck up?

I'm all right.

I'm just going

to give you a warning, okay?

That's the best I can fucking do

for all of youse!

Okay? He's crazy.

You got three seconds

to put your gun down, sir.

He has emotional

anger issue problems!


He goes to bed early

for this shit!

Just to wake up to pop one

in a motherfucker!


Mike, no!


Rock 'n' roll! Let's go!

Kill them cops!


Go! Go! Go! Go! Come on, go!

Get down!

Drop the...!

I didn't do shit!

Get your hands up.

The radios were fucked up.

Get some medics over here.

You guys okay?

Yeah, we're fine.

What you mean, "we"?

Motherfucker shot me

in the ass, man.

Who shot you in the ass?

Who? That "who" would be you.

Me? I shot you?


I mean, I was shooting.

Yeah, I did a lot of shooting,

but I ain't saying

I shot you in the ass.

I mean, I ain't saying

I didn't shoot you...

but, damn! Somebody

shot you in the ass.

Tell me about it.

Yo, man,

how's it feel?

It's hot, man.

I can smell my ass burning.

Yo, Mike, why don't you just

give it a little kiss, man,

you know,

so it'll feel better?

Hey, just pretend like

we're not even here, man.

Hey, isn't Ricky Martin

having a concert?

Get the fuck on.

You always gotta

go racial, man.

It's sad, man.

I think it's cool, man.

It hit the meat.

It ain't nowhere

near the hole.

Two lousy bags?

What ever happened to

the biggest shipment of ecstasy

to ever come out of Amsterdam?

Let me worry about

my snitch, all right?

It's a lot of cop work

for nothing!

Take your ass

home somewhere.

Tonight la policia

jacked my mules.

Who in this room

full of my manos

can tell me how those jackals

knew where to bite Johnny Tapia?

Speak up, cousins.

You're lucky they did not

find my drugs on Dixie 7.

Change the boat schedule.

We can't change it

now, Johnny.

We got a shipment Thursday.

Change it after.

Just keep them guessing.

You know, unlike you,

my daddy didn't leave

me no trust fund.

I got real-world shit

to deal with, Mike.

I'm not in it

for the thrills.

Same old shit, different day.

All right, yes, damn.

I shot you, all right?

But you wouldn't be seeing

nothing at all

if I hadn't made my move,

so I don't know why

you acting so angry about it.

Oh, you're misinformed.

I'm not angry.

Oh, you're very angry.

No, I'm not angry.

You are angry. It's okay.

I'm not angry.

Except when you keep repeating

"You're angry."

That shit's fucking annoying.

Like a fucking gnat

at a barbecue.

Just...just bugging the fuck

out of me.

Good. I want you to say:

"I'm angry. It's okay.

I'll process my anger.

I love myself. Whoosah."

I don't know what the fuck

you're talking about.

Yes, you do know

what the fuck I'm talking about.

You're the one that

needs therapy.

I did my therapy.


Capt. Howard

made me do it

after I shot all them people

at the airport.


Whoosah! Officer Mike.


Papi. That's "daddy," right?



Mike, you go

to therapy

to get your issues

worked out...

not bang your therapist.

See, now you just talking nasty.

I gotta survive.

I gotta start loving me for me.

Yeah, that sound like

that group thing talking.

Okay, maybe I did

the group thing once or twice.

♪ Whoosah ♪



A bunch of men

hugging and kissing.

That's some cult shit.



Ignore him, doc.

He's blowing this whole thing

out of proportion.

My ass is what's out

of proportion, Mike, okay?

I got a big chunk missing.

It's actually

a small chunk.

You know, man,

this undue tension

you bringing

into this relationship

ain't gonna be healthy

for us in the long run.

Maybe there ain't gonna be

no long run.


He's seeing a shrink.

I mean...


Icepick. Lowrey.

Hey, brother.

Two bags? You embarrassed me

in front of my people.

Wait, brother.

No, no, no, brother.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Whatever. You better pray

to whoever it is you pray to,

'cause you got 24 hours

to find that X

before I find you.

The cops hit my mule.

Well, Mr. Tapia, I don't know

where the heat is coming from.

It's a delicate situation

for both of us, isn't it?

I'm telling you,

I've checked them.

Alex, look, look, look.

A guy's OD'ing.

I'm sorry, Mr. Tapia.

I gotta hang up.

Some punk

thinks he can die in my club.

Ecstasy fucks them up.

Get him

out of here, Josef.

Sure, we'll dump him

around the block.

Dump him.

Auntie Syd,

it must be so cool...

Young, single,

living in New York.

Probably hook up with

a lot of cute guys...

just like Sex and the City.

Theresa, cancel

the damn cable.

So, Auntie Syd,

you're a cop too, huh?

Sort of. I mean,

I work for the DEA,

but I just push a lot of papers.

Nothing exciting.

Yeah, well,

you keep pushing papers.

Don't have to worry about

my little sister fighting crime.


Possibly getting hurt.

James. Get my screwdriver.

Damn bolts.

Ignore him. He's being mean

because he got injured.

Are you okay?

His wound is fine. It's, um...

other things that were affected.

Oh. Oh!




It's just nerve damage,

that's all.

Y'all not gonna spoil it.

I'll talk to you about it.


It's a donut.

It's a medical thing.

I got it from a maternity store.

You know, pregnant women use it.

They can put one cheek here,

and, like, it take the pressure

off the other cheek.

For you, dawg.


Look, man...

uh, you know, last night...

there was something

different in your eyes.

You know, Mike, I had

an epiphany. You know?

I realized you're an enigma.

Yeah, I could see that.

God sent you here to test me.

But guess what?

You not gonna break me,

Mike. No. Whoosah.

Is that Syd?

That's Syd.

Now's not a good time.

Mike, listen,

now's not a good time.

Hit me, hit me,

hit me.


No throwing balls

in the house!


What's up, Theresa?


Aw, they ain't tell me

it was a luau.

Hey, hey, whoa!

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, Syd,

hold up. Hold up. Hold on.

Behave yourself, girl.

Hey, hold up. Hold up. Hold up.

Oh, look at you. Look at you.

Oh, okay. Okay.

I see now.

You didn't tell Marcus

about New York.

Uh, he knows

about New York.

About us?

You told him about us?

No, he knows about New York.

You know, it's a nice city,

and that I dropped

a witness off last month.


Mike is so sweet.

So sweet he make

your teeth rot.

So have you

told him yet?

Baby, soon, okay? Real soon.

Well, he needs to know

you're transferring out

and you're not going to be

his partner anymore.

Theresa, timing is everything.

Marcus is not very happy

with me right now.


No, no, Syd,

I'm telling you,

that is Scarface

limping around in there.

Really. We need to give

that boy a few minutes

to let his butt

heal up good.

We like each other.

What's the big deal?

I'm just gonna go

tell him right now,

because this is dumb.


Hold up. Hold up. Let me...

I'm gonna tell him.

You know, it ain't like

I ain't gonna tell him.

How am I not tell him?


Okay, I need a minute.

All right?

Straight up. Me and...

We're not vibing right now.

I just need a minute.

Mike, he's my

brother, okay?

Don't be scared.

Toughen up, chief.

Whoa. Hey. Hey,

I ain't saying I was scared.

Just...There's something wrong

with your brother.

So, Mike, I understand

you were in New York last month.

Yeah, I did...

Remember? Remember,

I did the thing?

You remember?

Oh, um...

The two of you

should've gotten together.

That would've been

really nice.


Syd, I never told you

Mike was in New York.

Well, you know what,


Syd, she's gonna be in town,

what, another week?

Why don't you show her

around Miami?

That'd be nice.

That would be so great.

Yeah. Yeah, I could...

Well, me and...Marcus.

You want to...

You want to show her some stuff?

Yeah, because I'm in

town on vacation.

I'm staying

at the most amazing hotel.

The view, the pool...

Oh, my God.

We got a pool right here.

That ain't exactly a pool, man.

That's like a big-ass puddle

wrapped in blue plastic.

Daddy, didn't they have

any good pools

when you bought

this one?

Megan, that pool cost $3,900.

Okay, so how much

do the good pools cost?

It's all right, baby.

It is kind of whack,


I gotta go meet somebody.

It was nice seeing you again,


Nice...Good to see you.

Where you going?

Bye, sweetie.

I thought you were

on vacation.

So glad you could join us, Mike.

I'm telling you,

spending time like this

make a partnership strong.

Mike, can I see you

by my stupid pool?

What's the deal, baby?

Why you gotta always

come over here

and try to take over,

Mike? Huh?

What are you

talking about?

This is my family,

man. Okay?

What are you

talking about?

My place of peace.

Are you taking


You taking medicine

for the thing, right?

What'd I do?

Forget it.

Just forget it.

What'd I do?

Mason. Go fetch.

Now, that shit is funny.

That's some funny shit.


Oh, man, hold on.

Yo, it's Lowrey, you hot.



You better pray to God

you right this time.

Yo, dry off, sweetheart.

That's Icepick.

He said the Haitian Zoepounds

about to do a rip.

Let's move.

All right, guys, smarten up.

Talk to me.

Eyes on, agents. Good luck.

This is 105.

They're backing in.

I got a good look.

We got a good eyeball.

All right, we're in.

What's up?

You come highly recommended

out of New York.

You did some good jobs

for our Russian crew up there.

How old are you?

Old enough.

Come on. If you're going

to move this stuff,

you gotta do it quick.

Wow, nice getup.

You can start

to run these through.

I'd like to see

how your machine works.

Ooh, that sounded dirty.

"I would like to see how

your machine works, baby."

I wouldn't be so crude.

I mean, I'm more of a refined

kind of a human being.

You follow ballet?

Three of my cousins

are dancing

with the famous

Bolshoi Theatre

in Moscow.

I like hippie-hop too.

I gave you 5,000.


You gave me 4,900.

I gave you 5,000.



Count it.

If you want

to fuck with me again,

you can find yourself

another chump.


How much?


Look at this. Money everywhere.

Clean it up.

Okay, we want to change

a little over $3 million,

all right?

How many jobs did you do

with my friends

up there in New York?

Quite a few.

How you behave with me

has consequences

for a lot of people.

You found me,

not the other way around.

You need me to change

small bills to large ones

and make a delivery

to a third party,

and I'd imagine

he'd like his money

in a timely fashion.

Delivery's late, it's your ass,

not mine.


Here's 50,000 in 100s

for your 50,000 in 10s.

Third party

takes his million

in these five

briefcases here.

I hope I'm not

losing you, chief.

I hate math.

So for your $3 million

that we shrunk for you,

you get 2 million

in clean money back,

less our percentage,


I'll be delivering these

to your dealer.



We're giving too

fucking much away.


Yeah, we'll call the

general, renegotiate.

He's a businessman,

we're businessmen.

Yeah, call him.

You call.

Agents, we're on the move

to the money drop.


Hey, man, the truck's leaving.

We're going to follow it.

Don't lose that truck.

Follow that truck.

Follow that truck.



Yep, they saddling up.

Look like Icepick came through.

Wonder whose shit

they about to rip now.


Falcon One, do you see her

coming around the corner?

Stand by.

I don't want to get spotted,

take a burn.

Zoepound a bunch of pirates,

man. Steal anything.

Black Suburban at 10 o'clock.

Oh, come on, baby.

Park it at the top.

Roberto, she's coming to you.

I got her.

This is Falcon One, guys.

I got her coming up.

Heads up, guys.

I got an orange muscle car.

Looks to be three

black male occupants.

It's out of our field of vision.

Bring it up.

All right, be aware,

we got three bogeys


Guys, we got three bogeys.

They're splitting up.

They're moving.

Be aware. They're approaching...

Shit. Shit.


Fuck, it's a hit!


Agent down. Agent down.


fucking follow them!

I'm on it! I'm on it!


Stay here!

Son of a bitch!

It's Syd!

Move! Move!

Man, what is your sister into?

Sidewalk! Sidewalk!

Move! Move! Move!



I need backup on Canal,


You just get ready to shoot.


Stop the car!

Man, your badge?

He has a gun! Shoot him!

Mike, she's in

trouble, man.

Move! Get out of the way!

I think I done just got mad.

Gun! Gun! Gun!

Hold on.

Now show them your badge!

This shit is crazy.

I know, right?

Move! Move!

Get the world down here!


Go! Go!

Get out!

You, drive!


Go, go, go, Mike!

Punch that shit! Punch it!


Move! Move!

Don't lose her, Mike!

This is what I do!

Aw, shit! Shit.

And definitely shoot

that motherfucker that just...

Oh, man, my headlight.

Shoot back! Shoot back!

Shoot! Shoot!

Oh, man, what the...?!

What are you doing, man?

That's my bad.

Shoot outside!

Pay attention to

what you're doing.

Oh, these dudes

is off the chain!

Jesus! Fuck!

This is some sick shit!

Yep, it's about to

get sicker.

Watch out! Watch out!

Oh, sh...!

Oh, they are not

about to do that.

Hell, yes, they are!

You see that?

They throwing cars!

How am I not see that?

Mike, I'm just trying to help,


You know what'd be real

fucking helpful, Marcus?

Just shut the fuck up

and let me drive!

Let's try that!

Hey, come on, man,

with the screaming shit!

I'm trying to concentrate

on dodging these motherfuckers.

Just relax.

That motherfucker flipped!

That one

puckered up my butthole.

Almost fucking crushed my head.

The boat!


I lost them.

Yeah, I've got your cargo

to the backup drop point.


Attention all units,

suspects still at large.

There she is.

What the fuck

is going on, Syd?

Some desk

you're driving.

Get over here. I'm undercover.

And please call off your dogs.

I got DEA watching my back,

so don't blow my case.

We saved your life.

Yeah, and I appreciate that,

but what I don't appreciate is

you two following me over here,

nearly burning a case

that took five months to set up.

So now we lie

to each other?

Is that what we do?

What do you want me

to do, Marcus?

All right, y'all.

Fuck that, Mike, she's wrong.

Calm down. Relax.

Syd, are there drugs

in that truck?

There's cash.

Where's it going?

I can't tell you that.

Why not?

Because I have a career,

and if I want to keep it,

I have rules to follow.

What's that

supposed to mean?

It means that my orders are

under no circumstances

share information with Miami PD,

because they got

too many leaks.

Oh. I'm Miami PD now?

You done forgot I'm

your big brother, huh?

You know what, Syd?

That shit you did

was reckless,

it was stupid, and it

was dangerous. Okay?

I'm telling Mommy. Okay?

I'm definitely

leaking that shit.

Hey, Marcus...

Syd, come on,

he got a point.

Your brother loves you.

And not to mention

a little thing


professional courtesy.

You bouncing around

in somebody's backyard,

you should maybe let them

know about it.

First time

using your gun?

Hey, you handled

yourself very well.

Too bad your partner

didn't notice.


What, you think

you get off that easy?

You been working on this

for five months?

You ain't tell me

while I was in New York?

And what would you

have said?

What? I would've...

You know, I'd have

let you know

this job is rugged,

you know?

And it's dangerous,

and if something happen

to you, I might...

Exactly why I didn't

say anything.


stealing your money.

The drop's done. I gotta go.


We gotta close this case

before it get her killed.

Yeah, no doubt.

Hey, you ready to go

back to the station,

get our asses whupped?

I think we gonna

be all right.


What's your job description?

No, you two.

What is your job description?

I'll tell you. TNT.

Tactical Narcotics Team.

Keyword: "tactical."

"Displaying finesse and subtlety

in achieving a goal."

Tell me, gentlemen...

what was subtle

about your work today?

22 cars...and a boat?


How did you sink a boat?

We didn't sink it.

Hoo. Ha.

Whoosah. Whoosah.

All right, the positive.

Thank God no cops died.

The negative:

I got a police commissioner

so far up my ass,

if he spits,

it's coming out of my mouth,

but I know that there's

always two sides to a story,

so, what's yours?

Well, I was at

a family barbecue.

We got a tip that

the Zoepounders

were gonna do a hit

on cash or drugs

from this big-time X-Man.

That's what they call

a ecstasy dealer

on the streets.

Marcus, I...I know

what they call them.

That's why I'm captain.

It's cool.

So you got the drugs.

No drugs. Oh, okay. All right.

How about the money?

No money.

Well, then, who is this X-Man?


I was at a family barbecue,

so I...

We don't know,

but we are going to find out.

Well, then all that...

was for nothing?

Oh, we didn't do all of that.

If you look close...

Watch. Hold up. Let me s...

There's DEA all over.

Wait, the...Wait, hold up.

The DEA? Without consulting me?

That's a DEA car right there.

Christ! Fuck!

Cap. No. Remember

your pressure points.

Do my...My exercises.


Holler at your boy.

Whoosah. Whoosah.




Oh, kiss my black ass.

It was the dashboard.


You know what?


Yeah, you'll get your money.

Yeah, somebody's on they way

with your money.


is it possible

we could discuss

potential reimbursement...

Property's not covered,

personal property.

That's why we drive police cars.

So, where do we go from here?

The Zoepounders knew exactly

when to hit the drop,

where to hit the drop,

so we figure they know

where the cash has gone.

We find the cash,

we find the X-Man.

Hey, I'm through playing games,

all right?

I have three cops critical.

I got kids dying

on my streets

from souped-up X.

I do not want these animals

taking over my city.

Do you understand?

So I want you guys

to do whatever you do,

whatever it takes,

but do it now.


It's not good, boss.

Oh, my God.

Fucking ratones eating

my fucking money.

Carlos, this is a stupid

fucking problem to have,

but it is a problem nonetheless.

Rat fuckers.

Rat fuckers.

Boss, it ended up crazy.

This black chica

working for the Russians

was a goddamn maniac lunatic.

She saved your money.

She wasted some Haitians

and got the load

to the backup drop.

Also, Roberto saw these two

crazy gangbanger homeys.

Oh, shit.

Chasing and shooting.

Old days, did I have

this problem? No.

Just fly the drugs in

and ship the money out.

Now American security's

so goddamned tight

over the water

and in the goddamn sky,

that the rats eat my money

before I can get it to Cuba.

You see?


Fiery crash...

I can't even

get my money across town

without making the news.

Hey, man. Man.


should I be worried?

No, boss.

Shut the fuck up.

People is trying

to jack my loads

here in Miami.

I own this fucking town.

You see?

This is my town.

Papi, papi!

Oh, my God. Pink.

Pink, niña, pink. Pink.

No powder blue.

Pink is prettier.

But the lady at the store

said I look like a model.


You're lucky your mother

was my mother's cousins.

Don't pay attention

to Roberto...


Besides, models

are filthy creatures.

You look

more like an angel.

What do you think,


Yes, of course.


what do you think?

It's fucking beautiful.

Hey, talk polite

in front of

my little bonbon...

or I'm gonna

chop your balls off.

Hey, dude, for real,

I'm straight with

all your spiritual

enlightenment and shit,

but I need to know

if a crackhead roll up

behind me with a .9,

you're gonna cook that fool.

No question about it.

Shoot him in the leg.

Come on with that leg shit.

Everybody deserves

a little dignity.

What about my dignity?

Your crackhead gonna

be missing a kneecap.

I'm gonna be in a body bag.

So sad.

What's so sad?

Your untreated control issues.

It's not your fault.

What in the hell

is that supposed to mean?

Your mama probably refused you

her tit when you were a baby.

You grew up a malnourished

high-school softie.

Got your gun,

little tight T-shirt,

and became

a overcompensating tough guy.

That is the last time

you will ever

refer to my mother's titties.

I don't even want them

up in your head.

You know, I said all that, Mike,

and all you heard was "titties."

Man, you can't keep suppressing

my spiritual growth, Mike.

You need to suppress

my mother's titties

out of

your psychoanalysis.

You just remember

one thing, my friend.

I may not always

be here.

What's up, Icepick?

Jesus is the way,

my brothers.

Step inside.

You just went number one

on Uncle Mike's shit list.

We got

two lousy bags, man.

My brothers.

Haitian blond with dreads.

Where is he?

Blondie Dread? Uh-uh.

He's very expensive.

You and you have to

do something for me.

Oh, you trying to get gangsta

on me like that?

Yeah, he went gangsta.

So we should probably...

So we want to do the...

Yeah, sure.

Me and my partner, we're on

the Miami PD tandem dance team.

We got a routine.

We won all the local

talent shows.

We thinking about

going national.

You want to show him

some of the routine?

Ooh, warm it up.

Don't hurt nothing.

Yo, yo, watch this. Watch this.

This the shit right here.

This is the shit.

♪ It's your birthday

It's your birthday ♪

♪ It's your birthday ♪

What you doing

to my shop, man?

Watch this spin.


What are you doing?

Oh, give me some.

You're ruining my shop. Stop!

Do the dance thing.

I'm gonna bring the house down.

No! No!


He lives in a pink house

eight blocks from here

on Carl Street.

Police! Get down.


Who that? Who in my house?

I'm the devil. Who's asking?

The devil is not welcome here!

You got to call yourself

the devil in his house? Shit!

You're in my house!

This is all your fault!

You're in my country, though.

Fuck you, how's that?

I'm gonna kill you,


Your country, my ass!

Fuck you.

Fuck me? Fuck you!

You no problem!

Mike, do you have to be

so combative?


You calling me a bitch? Hey?


Do or die, man!

A bullet in the head'll

really mess up your extensions.

Take your bullet

and eat that shit, man.

How about that?


What the fuck?

Sir, we just want to talk.

You want to talk?

Well, go ahead. Go ahead.

We're not Immigration.

They can't hear you because

they're still shooting at you.

Fucking Haitians

in a fucking little-ass room

with fucking guns. Shit!

Got to make it home

to my babies.

Damn, now.


You killed my brother!

That's a bitch!

Shoot them. Fucking shoot them.

They shot me.

They got me, man. Yo!

Got you.

Oh, shit! Motherfucker!

They killed the boy!

They kill me!

They're killing everybody!


I'm gonna kill you,


Come. Come kill me,


Come on.

You don't take me alive.

You have three seconds

to drop your weapon!

I got a present for you!

A nice present for you!



I'm gonna kill you.

Don't shoot.

Don't shoot.

Don't shoot, man.

Don't kill me.

You know, the...

Bullets, man, all...

Excuse me.

You all right, man?

Apologize to that man.

Apologize to that man.

Apologize! Apologize.

Hey, listen, I owe you...

It's just that, you know,

you was disrespect...

But that don't mean

it give me the right,

though. It don't.

Excuse me. Whoosah. Whoosah.

Whoosah, motherfucker!


See, the interesting

thing is

he's the one of us

that's not pissed off.

I don't know nothing.

Whoa, I didn't ask you

no question yet!

I don't know


Lying to me already?

How'd you know about the drop?

I don't know


Stop lying!

Stop lying!

Do you know anything?

I'm gonna be nice about it.

Do you know anything?

Let's ask

some other suspects.

Hey, look, man, fuck it.

No, let's try this.

Let's talk to his homeys.

Hey, look here, man.

Can you tell me who was driving

the black Suburban? Huh?

Oh, he don't know nothing.

His brains

is under the end table.

Oh. Sh...

He can't tell us shit, Mike.

He's all fucked up.

What's your point?

Dead suspects can't say shit.

Well, it seems like

live suspects

don't say shit either,

so I'm gonna go ahead

and hot this dude here.

Save us the paperwork.

I don't know nothing!

I don't do motherfucking

surveillance, man.

He do surveillance,


He don't let nobody

touch his camera.

What's on that camera?

Trigger Mike strikes again.

Hi, welcome to Phat's.

How can I help you?

Miami PD.

Whoa. Cops.

I love that show.

We need to see what's

on this videotape.


You got a little

bullet hole in there.

You guys tell me about it?

Guess not. Okay. All right.

Okay, we'll put this

in our central floor model.

It's got kick-ass bass.

You guys like hip-hop music?

I love hip-hop.

Sometimes we freestyle

in the break room.

If you guys ever want

to kick it, we'll flow.

All right, we're gonna

set you up on the wide-screen.

Correct ratio...

Spanish Palms Mortuary.

Why would they

be doing surveillance

at a funeral home?

Is that a Cuban flag?

Uh, uh...right there.

See the gun?

Never knew

the guards at funeral homes

needed to carry

them kind of weapons.

It just seems like

we should turn it off,

you know,

because my dad owns the store.

She got a tongue ring.

This is like a porno.

We're not...

Dude. Dude.

All right?


Okay. Okay.

It's just, you know,

my dad's gonna be...

I just need to...I think I...


This is official

police business.

What the fuck's

going on here?

Out of my way.

My dad is coming.

My dad is coming.

What the hell is going on

in my store?

Son, how did this porno crap

get on my videos in my store?

What the hell is

going on in here?

You all right?

No, I'm not

all right, Mike.

Three days

of this shit.

Got my nerves

all rattled.

My ass still hurts...

from what you did to it

the other night.

Oh, my Lord.

Yeah, it got rough.

You know?

I mean, we got caught up

in the moment, shit got crazy.

You know how I get.

When you popped me from behind,

I think

you damaged some nerves.


Now I can't...

Now I can't...

Can't what?

I can't even get an erection.

What's an erection?

I tried taking Viagra, you know,

pop one, pop two.

Been eating them like Skittles.

That poor man is

pouring out his heart.

And I'm still flaccid.

Um, okay.

I'm comfortable

talking to you...

It's got 5.1 Dolby.

MIKE: ...about what I did

to your ass...

but you not getting

an erection...

that's a real problem

for me.

I just figured

I could talk to you.

Yeah, yeah, no, no.

We're partners,

but we are partners

with boundaries.

We got a new rule.

From now on, you can't say

the word "flaccid" to me.

He's a mean fuck.

Look here.

This is our little boundary box.

So we gonna take

the word "flaccid,"

and we're gonna put it in there

with my mom's titties...

with your erection problems,

and we're gonna

close this box...

and we're gonna throw this bitch

in the ocean,

and the only way that you can

get to this box

is you got to be motherfucking

Jacques Cousteau.

We cool?


Oh, shit.

We gotta go.

In front of my babies

you got porno

and homo shows up in here?

What kind of freak-ass store

is this?

And you two motherfuckers

need Jesus.

Cover your ears, baby.

Palm Mortuary, owned by

an offshore holding company,

which, after 17 layers

of bullshit,

turns out to be registered

to Donna Maria Tapia,


of Hector Juan Carlos Tapia,

who calls himself


Johnny Tapia. Shit.

Looks like every time

the PD goes after him,

he sues for wrongful arrest.

And, oh, does he win.

Look. Last year

he was awarded $9 million,

and got a dozen

dumb-ass officers like you


Well, he hasn't

run across us yet.

You know, we'd sure like to hear

what's going on in that house.

Yeah, use your computer brain

and tap the phone.

Well, um, well...

that happens

to be highly illegal

without a judge.

Um, we were thinking

of something

more along the lines

of a training operation.

No, no, no, I can't do that.

Get you tickets

to the Heat game.

I need floor seats.

With them thick-ass glasses,

you don't need floor seats.

The man can see the game

from the parking lot.

See, I can't work

under these conditions.

Floor seats to the Heat.

You got it.


Yes, Lakers.

Okay. Watch me work.


Hello? Is this

the pest control?

Yeah. We got a fucking problem.

You know where we live.

Yeah, South Miami.

We got it.

Got our way in.


You got to put a word to it.

It's like, secret.

So, y'all want to kill roaches?


Look, we go

in, plant a couple gypsy wires,

find out what Tapia's up to.

These are your basic

household bugs.

Dawg, this is what we do.

What's the sprayers for?

The roaches.

Roaches? We got rats.

Say what?

Uh, that's not going

to be an issue.

We can handle that.

We're just going to

have to adjust

our approach

a little bit.

Nope. Nope.

I don't mess with no rats.

Hey. Stop it.

We're in. Get your head right.

Mike, I'm a grown-ass man.

Well, get your grown-ass

self together,

and let's do this.

This is a beautiful

house you got here, sir.

Well, start looking.

They're all over.


Oh, uh, those ain't

normal rats.

What he means is that...

that they're obviously

a special breed.

Well, what kind of breed

are they?

Big motherfuckers.

Taking care

of these rats

is not going

to be a problem,

but are going

to need to make sure

they're not breeding

in other sections of the house.

Yeah, at Zook...

we like to, uh, work

from the outside in,

you know?

So we're going

to leave these...

Excuse me.

Um, we're going to

leave these here

and send in a special unit.

It probably would

be better

if we began in

the rest of the house.

You're not getting

near the rest of the house.

Sir, we're not going to be able

to guarantee our work.


the only thing

that we can guarantee

is that these rats are

going to keep fucking,

you know, giving

off offspring,

until we find

the colony.

Rats don't got

no stinking colony.

Well, actually,

these are colonial rats.

What they do is

they send out worker rats

that are called...



These drones,

they're explorers

of the rat world,

you know?

They just looking

for rat pussy.


Are you fucking with me?

Hold on. You called us.

We can leave,

but what you should understand

is that these rats

are going to hump twice a day.

All right. Down there.

Just kill them

and bring me the bill.

That's that bullshit.

That's that bullshit

right there.

You see these rats?

Plant your wires.

You're not

leaving me here...

Plant your wires.

Gentlemen. Alexei, Josef.

Oh, I really like

that word, Johnny.


I'm just trying

being civil.

This is business,

we can all relax.

Alexei, would you like

a good Cohiba?

Why not?

Of course,

and you, Josef?

I'm told you are quite

a wine connoisseur.

I am.

Carlos, have Josef

pick a good wine

from the cellar,

and Alexei and I

will have a cigar.

Come on.


Where the fuck

you going?

Uh, pretty bad problem

you got up here.

I'm going to head

down to the truck,

get some poison

pellets and stuff.

Come straight back.

No screwing around.


They're all over.

Nice place

you got here.

It's Mama's,

and it's a shithole.

Built a fucking

million years ago.

Expensive shithole, eh?

Oh, no.

My new place,

the one I'm building in Cuba.


Almost finished.

Everything fucking shiny new.

Come on upstairs.


Oh, shit.

Oh, shit!

Look at the balls

on that motherfucker.


the camera's out

in the general's office.

Everything in this house

is broken.

My wire's planted.

How about yours?

Almost got three wires planted.


There's a papa rat

humping the shit

out of this mama rat.

No, he's straight

pile-driving her.

Now, how is that information

going to help me do my job?

They fuck just like us.

Where's the pest guy?

There's something going on

down here.

Goddamn rats.

Yeah, they everywhere,

just like cockroaches.

No disrespect,

but I do not wish

to talk business

until my partner return.

It's baffling.

You decide you want

to pay me less money,

and you talk about respect?

Let's wait for Josef.

You know, me and digits...


could you please bring Josef in?



your partner is here.

Would you like to talk now?

Carlos, another box.

So you sign over

ownership papers

for all the Florida

clubs you own,

and I will control everything

from point of origin

to sale, okay?

No middleman.

Especially Russian middleman.

With all due respect,

Mr. Tapia,

in my country,

I see such things all the time.

I'm sorry for your country.

That's got to be

some Cuban stupid tradition

to put them

in a tortilla bin.

Now, listen to me,

you Russian punk.

I, me, Johnny Tapia,

will sever your head off!

You kill me,

and you will have a shit-storm.

Should I screw

your young wife...

or visit your son,

the soccer player?

My daughter knows your son.

You're going to regret this.

I hope that we can

remain friends,

because at the end,

what else do we have

but friendship, trust,


Without this,

we are no more than beasts.

The kitchen monitor's out.

What the hell's going on

out there?


I found something.

It's a guy's finger.

What? What, did the rats

eat the rest of him?

What the fuck

are you doing?

Oh, hey,

I was just looking for you.

I think I figured out

what your problem is.

Y'all a bunch of filthy



Blow out!

Blow out!

What's going on? Shit.

Get out of the house!

Blow out, blow out!

This shit's got to stop.


We should go.

Hold it!

Go! Go!

Just another day

with Mike Lowrey.

Damn! Go!

Come on!

Roberto thinks they

were the gangbangers

that tried to hijack

the drop, boss.

How did this thing happen?

I don't know.

We called

the rat people,

and these guys

showed up.

Maybe you're

the rat, huh?

They tried

to steal from me,

and you let them

into my mother's house.

Johnny. Hey, no.

I would never...

Nobody puts in danger

my daughter, my mother...

or my money.

Send him to

the mortuary.

Johnny! Johnny,

what happened to Roberto?

He killed himself, Mama.


Very sad.

Make sure and write

a nice letter to his mother.

I'll do it.

Okay. Bye.

Yo, run the print.

Hey, Mike, stop playing, man.

Run the print.

Don't touch me with no fucking

dead finger. I'm serious.

Excuse me, run this print.

I need to find the owner.

Thank you.

Fletcher, think you can

find out

what's on these shreds?

Of course.


Listen, we're thinking

about ordering

a little bit

of lunch.

Should we put you down

for a bucket

of extra-crispy

and a couple of

cream sodas?

"Couple of cream sodas."

That's very funny.

That's hilarious.

Isn't it low tide?

You know, I think it is.

Don't you have some

relatives to pick up?


Yo, now you crossed

the line, man.

Okay, no,

that's not funny.

We're fucking with you.

Look, we planted some wires,

we need some help. No bullshit.

I want you...

to find out...

who those two black

puta de mierda are,

and I want them

lying right here...

in Mama's garden

in these coffins.

And our mystery

finger belongs to...

Josef Kuninskavich.

Oh, man, this dude

was a lieutenant

in a Russian mob.

Owned a couple dozen

Florida nightclubs.

Tapia's starting to knock

off Russian mob bosses.

Got something.

What you got,


The computer

matches half tones,

gray tones,


Sort of like a visual


Little something I put together.

The shredded papers

you found was a photograph.

Some kind of boat.

Dixie 7.

Dixie 7.

It's registered to a one

Floyd Poteet.

The Poteet brothers.

One of the KKK guys

we busted.

You blew his ear off,


Mike, can you teach me

how to shoot people?

Listen to what we got

at Tapia's.


Si, boss.

Now, this is

the second-in-command talking.

He's telling him,

"Yes, boss.

"We found a bunch

of fat doe fuckers,

and we're getting

them emptied."

Fat does emptied?

The hell does

that mean?

He has a meeting this afternoon.



You know who I am?

SYD: Name sounds


TAPIA: Sense of humor.

I like that.

Meet me on the sand,

2:00, Shore Club.

She has no idea.

Let's roll.

Y'all come with us.

I ordered us a couple

of Bacardi Mojitos.



Okay, zoom in on nine.

A little more audio, please.

So why don't we

take a swim? Cool off.

Or we could just stay here

and get drunk. How about that?

Or we could drink this later.

Unless you have a reason

why you don't want to get that

beautiful body of yours wet.

Why don't you just ask me

if I'm wearing a wire?

I'd rather go swimming.

What the hell's he doing?

Son of a bitch.

Shit, he's taking her

into the water.

This guy's smart.

I want you to

work for me, okay?

Why waste time on this

unnecessary conversation?

It's very unnecessary.

What do you need

with another banker?

For the same reason

as your previous employer.

But now I own all

the Russian clubs.

No middleman.

You know, I'm about to be

the biggest importer

and distributor of ecstasy

in North America.

You're going to be

a very rich young woman.

That's why

I thought...

I know what you thought,

Mr. Tapia.

As long as you don't think it

more than once,

I'm happy to be

in business with you.

All right.

Let's do business.

What are you, a cop or a model?

What you talking

about, man?

I threw something on.

I like looking good. What?

For who?

Hey, don't hate the player.

Hate the game.

I hate the tailor.

Good job.

We'll get him.

Your brother would

love to talk to you

down the street.

Whoa, what's

going on?

You guys trying

to blow my case

or just insane?

You're the one

taking a little dip

with the Cubano maniac.

How'd you know that?

We had a wire

in the house.

You two have a warrant

for that wire?

Look, fuck that, okay?

You don't know

the kind of danger

that you're in, Syd.

I am fully aware,

and I am fully capable

of what I am doing.

Marcus, I am not

your baby sister anymore.

For the DEA,

you ain't nothing

but a honeypot.

What'd you just say?

Look, that's why

you got the job,

because you look good

in a bathing suit.

All right, let's

sit down somewhere.

All right, look, Syd,

there's some shit

you need to know.

Johnny Tapia is cutting up

Russian mob bosses

in his mom's kitchen.

In the kitchen, Syd.

He found a severed finger

by the crock pot.

You're about to be in the middle

of a drug war.

No disrespect, but Miami PD

has arrested this guy 12 times

with no convictions.

Why don't you guys

just hang back

and let us

bring him down?

Guys, look, I need this, okay,

and I am this close.

What's "this close"?

I'm in charge

of money laundering

for his entire operation.

In a month or two we'll have

enough for a conviction,

and this whole thing

will be over with.

What about a day or two?

Sound better?

Marcus and I

think we found the key

to Tapia's

whole operation.

You have nothing to say

now, huh? Just stuck, right?


time out, y'all. Damn!

We got this peckerwood

that's going to put us down

with the transport end

of Tapia's operation.

Do you want in?

Mike, why would you...



Page me.

Should I bring my thong?

Get your bitch hands off!

I'll knock you the fuck out!

Mike, we're trying to keep

her out of trouble, man,

not invite her in.

Man, I just

figured, you know,

if she with us,

that's just less trouble

she could get into.

I'm going to keep it

real with you too, man.

I think she can

handle herself.

I'm going to keep it

real with you.

Don't nobody

know my sister

the way I do, okay?

She doesn't

make good choices, Mike.

She's not


Doesn't make good...

Like, what kind

of choices?

Men, for one.

She's attracted

to these dumb,

flashy, just musclebound

dickheads, Mike, you know?

Cock diesel motherfuckers

that can't even fucking turn

to wipe

their ass, Mike.

You feel me?


You know?

Just dumb as a bucket of shrimp.

Yeah. Yeah, that shit's crazy.

I mean, you don't think

maybe you...

maybe you

didn't, like,

get a chance to know

any of them?

I'm going to give

the next one a chance.

A chance

to whup his ass.

Whup the shit

out of him.

Oh, you going to fight him?

What I'm going to do

ain't even going

to be legal.

I might be up in here

with these motherfuckers.

Do you know what I mean?

The fuck you looking at?

Thank you kindly.

Who sprung me?

Hey, Cousin Floyd.

Oh, you.

Remember me?


Y'all look great together.

What the fuck

you doing?

Oh, no, just

a little insurance.

You going to help us find

Dixie 7,

and let us know what that boat

has to do with Johnny Tapia.

I ain't no snitch.

Oh, you ain't no snitch?

Oh, damn. That's a shame.

Know what I'm going to do?

I'm going to send

a special 8 x 10

to his KKK buddies back in jail.

You know what?

It's a digital photo too.

So we can pretty much

do whatever we want

to do with it.

Hey, look, by the time

we get done with you,

you going be in the next

Busta Rhymes video on BET.

Tuck ass.

I got my rights.

I'm worried.

There's too much heat

around in Miami.

I can feel it.

I can feel it.

We need to put my money

in coffins to Cuba faster.

You should tell the mortuary

to speed things up. All right?

That's the channel marker

way out there.

They make the drop

mostly at dawn,

but there'll be one today,


Syd, you talk to Mama?

She's got hives.

Oh, and I told Mama

about your Cubano boyfriend.

He ain't invited

to Christmas dinner.

Change the station.

More music, less Marcus.

If you open the door,

he'll be a black Dr. Phil

for the next 40 minutes.

Syd, you might not want

to get too flirty with Mike.

Your boyfriend might cut off

his trigger finger.

Maybe Mike's been

flirting with me.

Did you ever think

about that?


Trigger Mike?

Not like this.

Don't play with the boy.


Don't play with the boy.

Just tell him about New York.

Do it.

Tell me what?

Oh, shit. Is he

walking down the steps?

Oh, shit.

He coming down.

It's okay.

Yeah, you done

fucked up.

You done fucked up.

Um, you remember...

Remember I went to New York?

You remember?

And...I said, "Syd."

I ran in...

Syd ran into me

in New York

on the street in that place.

And I said, "What's up?"

And we was hungry,

so then...

she had fish.

It was grouper,

and then I had

some chicken.

Remember I was supposed

to come home,

but I didn't?

We went out on a date.

Five, actually.

Now we're seeing

each other.

Hold up.

You know, really out of

respect for you, Marcus,

you know,

nothing happened.

Hey, Mike,

why you tripping, man?

I mean, we wanted to make sure

that you was cool with it.

Doesn't matter

what I think, you know?

Hey, I had to find out

like this, right?

Don't matter.

Let me ask you,

y'all going

to have babies?

Little bunch of mini Mikes?

Bunch of little lying,

violent motherfuckers?

Marcus, nothing happened.

I just want to say,

Mama's going to be thrilled.

All right,

you know what?

You need to go ahead and

"whoosah" or something

for a second.

Hey, hey,

here comes the Dixie 7.


Mike, just leave it alone.

Why you acting

like that?

Hey, Mike, go on about

your business, man.

No, we're going

to talk about this.

No, get out of my face.

I'm trying to talk to you.

Get the fuck off me, Mike.

What the hell is

your problem, man?

Why you acting so stupid?

This is a dysfunctional


That's why the fuck

I'm acting like that.

There ain't no trust,


I didn't lie to you!

I was waiting for the

right time to tell you,

but that ain't

what your issue is.

Why don't you

bring it to me real?

What is your problem

with this?

You know what?

You a dog, man.

That's it. There it is.

I said it.

Oh, okay.

You like a pit bull

with that little pink thing

hanging out, Mike.

Oh, it's like that.

Oh, okay.

I'm not good enough

for your sister.

Guys, enough. The boat's coming.

Okay. We going to

handle that shit.

Go ahead, man.

In about an hour,

the drop boat's going to come.

We got them.

Wonder what mortuary

that coffin's going to.

Keep going straight by.

You seeing what I'm seeing?

Get the load to the mortuary,

and don't screw up.

I got it.

Load up.

They're getting away!

Stop! Stop!

We need your car.

All right?

Get out of the car.

Can you not get a better car

than that?

Let that man go!

Don't be coming at me

with that tone, Mike.


Small cars don't fuck up

the ozone layer.

That's what

I'm talking about.

Stop the car.


Pop the trunk.

Get out. Get in.

Get out. Get out.

Get your ass in.


I am in the middle of a sale.

Do I have to pull my gun?

Oh, shit. Dan Marino.

What's up?

Back up, Dan.

Hey, you're the truth.

Whatever you need,


That's Dan Marino.

Hey. Back up.

Let me know how it rides.

Oh, he's gonna

test-drive the shit out this.

Go. I don't want

to blow my cover.

Got them. Got them right there.

Mike, why do you got

to get so close?

I'm not going to let

that coffin get away.

But they're all around us,


Shit, those are the gangbangers.

Relax, they don't

know us.

Boss, we got a problem here.

We're being followed.

This is a big problem, Carlos.

Sorry, boss.

I'll take care of it, okay?

You kill those black bitches.

All right?

Shit. I think they made us.

Get some undercovers

to roll with us.

Okay, we're splitting up.

Everybody go

to Third and Boxter, now!

Here we go.

I didn't sign up

for no goddamned car chase!

Have you lost your mind?

Mike, I see you got your mind

set on doing dumb shit,

so please let me out!

I seen this in a movie once.

They didn't make it!


Oh, shit!

Dump truck!

I got it.


I'm fine. I'm fine.

Whoa! Whoa! Mike! Whoa!

Right there!

Oh, shit, Mike!

Did you see that shit?

No shit.

Dan Marino should

definitely buy this car.

But not this one.

I'm fucking this one up,

but he should definitely

get one like this.

All right,

that was almost fucked up.

I almost fucked up.

This is not necessary.

Oh, shit!

Dead man on

the hood! Dead man!

I'm trying

to get it off.

I'm trying to

get it off.

That shit's nasty.

That's nasty.

That shit is nasty.

Undercover police!

Everybody move!

Undercover police! Move!

Move! Move! Move!


Coming around the corner now!

Get ready, they're coming

around the block. Move!

Shit! Boy, if this was my car,

I'd be pissed!

Get down! Get down!

Trying to break

the world record

for gun fights in a week?

This is not the time

to criticize!

I can't work with you

blaming shit on me

all the time!

This is not your fault?

This is not. No. No!

Bullshit, Mike!

Everything's your fault!

Okay, let's go! Let's go!

Clear around! Cool!

I'm going around!

Mike, got him!

They got the coffin.


Move! Move! Get down!

Police! Get down!

Move! Move!

Police! Move! Move!

Get out of my way!

Move! Move!

Open the door! Police!

Whoa! Shit!

Mike! Mike!

That boy bit me!


Move! Move!

Police! Move!

Police! Move!

He under there?

We lost the coffin,

and you barbecued

our only lead, Mike.

This has got to be the worst,

most emotional cop week

of my life.

Yeah, it's been a little rough.

Where were

these bodies going?

I don't know.

It's really strange.

All the John Does

we found out here are empty.

Empty Does. Fat Does.

Cut them open,

took the organs out,

sewed them back up.

Nice work.

The more you guys fuck up,

the more we look

like rock stars, baby.

The van you was chasing

is a transport for

the city morgue.

These John Does here

were being delivered

to the university

for medical research.

Nice going.

I can't believe you guys.

Do you both wake up

in the morning,

call each other up?

"Good morning, Marcus."

"Good morning, Mike."

"How you doing?" "A'ight."

"So, how are we going to fuck up

the captain's life today?"

"Gee, I don't know."

"I don't know."

"Ooh. Look, over there.

Let's kill three fat people

and leave them on the street."

Hey, they were dead

before we ran over them.

It doesn't matter whether they

were dead or not, goddamn it!

Every time you leave a corpse

on the street,

I have to get

these forensic coroner guys

to come

and to see what happened.

Then I've got to get detectives.

See? They're detecting shit.

Then I've got to get

these forensic guys

to stick them back

in the fucking bag!

Jesus Christ!

You guys, you're like...

You're like a bunch

of bloodsucking ticks

draining the life's blood

out of this department.


Damn the whoosah,


Did you just

call me a tick?

I was referring to him.

Captain, these are not

normal corpses.

If I threw you

out of a speeding ice truck

and then ran over your head,

you wouldn't be normal either.

Think about this

for one second.

All of these bodies

have been emptied out

from a drug smuggler

that just happens

to own a mortuary,

and I got a bunch

of bodies hanging around

with plenty of room

in them...

I could smuggle some shit.

Johnny Tapia

has the perfect cover.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Johnny Tapia?

Yes. I want a warrant to go

into his mortuaries immediately.

No warrant. What?

For what? For what?

For a bunch of dead guys

on their way

to med research?

No. Every time we go after him,

he sues us and wins.

This shit stops now

or they'll fire us, disband TNT,

and stick me

in a fucking coffin.

This is over now!

What happened to

"whatever it takes"?

That was pre-vehicular


Not to mention

Johnny Tapia...


What the fuck is that?

Oh, shit.

Shut up. Shut up.

Shut up. Shut up.

This man has violated

my rights!

Who the fuck is that?

Running people over

is not enough for you?

Now you're into kidnapping?

Captain, that man

is a criminal. Okay?

We busted him at the...

Excuse me. I have so

much brass up my ass

I could be playing

"The Star-Spangled Banner."

I ain't cut out

for this, man.

Come on, man. I can't do this

with you right now.

I'm re-evaluating

what's important.

About what? Being a cop?

No, about you

being my partner.

Is this about Syd?

God! Hey, Marcus, man...

That was messed up,

but that ain't what

this is about, Mike.

Once we nail Tapia,

you and me, we're over.

I already signed

my transfer papers.

Megan, what's the

name of this boy

taking you to the movies?


Daddy, please don't embarrass me

and ask him a lot of questions.

Everybody knows

you're a cop,

and it makes

people nervous.

Well, why nervous? He on crack?


It's cool?

Yeah. Come in.

What'd you...?

I got a sneak and peek.

Judge Sinclair said

we can go into

the mortuary tonight.

We can't touch nothing,

but if we find something,

he said he'll give us

a righteous warrant.

You love pissing

Captain Howard off,

don't you?

Hey. It's what I do.

So, when you start

playing golf?

Hey, so you real serious

about this

transfer thing, huh?

I mean, you been quitting

for 10 years.

I just always thought it was,

you know,

how you dealt

with all this shit.

It's what's best

for me and my family.

Look, I'm gonna get

my stuff, man.


"We ride together,

we die together.

Bad boys for life."


We getting old,


One of them young punks


to take my baby out

on her first date.

Who the fuck are you?

Hi, Mr. Burnett. I'm Reggie.

What you doing here?

I came to take out Megan.


I came to take out Megan.

How old are you?

I'm 15, Mr. Burnett.


you look 30.

Show me some ID.

I don't have none on me.

You don't have no ID.

Get your ass up

against that wall.

What the fuck

is your problem?

You think you know it all.

Little young Thundercats.

You got joints on you?

You smoke

that shit?

No, sir.

You trying to get

my daughter high?

Do you smoke that shit?

Marcus! Nigga, who that

at the door?

It's Reggie.

Who the fuck is Reggie?

Came to take Megan out.

What you want, nigga?

I'm here to take

his daughter out.

What's your name?


I heard the motherfucker

say your name Reggie.

You taking Megan out?

How old is you?


Shit, nigga,

you at least 30.

This is Mike.

Can you fight?


You can fight?


You can't fight.

Look at you.

Mike, Mike...

I want to know if...

When somebody

taking my niece out,

I want to know

if he can fight.

Somebody might

come say something,

the nigga can't fight,

she can't go.

This is Megan's

godfather, okay?

He just got out the joint.

Why you putting all my

business in the street?

They call him...

I just got out of jail,

and I ain't going back!

I ain't going back!

What's wrong with you?

You acting all scared.

Nigga, you ain't never

seen a gun before?

Mike, stop pointing

the gun at the boy, man.

Nigga, look, don't

you disrespect me

in front of company.

All right,

let the gun go off.

Nigga, you a big, old,

tall Ludacris-looking

motherfucker, ain't you?

You rap?


♪ Move, nigga, get out the way ♪

♪ If I see you on the highway

Get the fuck outta my way ♪

Hey, Mike!

Now, listen.

Have my daughter

home at 10:01.

If she ain't home

at 10:01,

I'm in the car, okay?

Lock, loaded, and hunting

your motherfucking ass down.

Do you hear me?

Speak up,


I'll go with him.

And if I'm there, know

what it's going to be?

Chitty Chitty

Bang Bang, nigga.

That's what it's going to be.

THERESA: Marcus!

Oh, Reggie, baby,

I am so sorry.

Please forgive Megan's dad

and his silly friend.

You a virgin?


Keep it that way. Ain't gonna be

no fucking tonight.

Baby, the red shirt's nice.

I like that.

You guys have a good time.

You ever made love

to a man?


You want to?

No, sir.

Hey, have

a good time, baby.

MEGAN: Go. Go.

All right.

MEGAN: We need to go.

That was cool.

So, you ready to

bust this case open?

Oh, yeah. Let's finish

strong, all right?


All right, ladies.

We cannot take a burn tonight,

or Tapia walks.

I need a good, clean break-in.

Zank, eyeball.

Eyeball set.

Dex, high ground.

Rooftop set.

Fanuti, light your crack pipe.


Lockman, you buzzing?

We're up, baby.


Hello, anybody home?

We got a stiff to deliver!

What's going on here, man?

We got a stiff

to deliver.

Nobody told me about any stiff.

No, the guy's in the van

right now. He's fresh.

There's no deliveries


They told us to come

right over to the place.

This is the place.

My friend, we've got to

bring him in here.

No one in.

You guys get that body

to the morgue yet?


You said to get it to

the Spanish Palms Mortuary.

No, you dumb Latin fuck.

What are you smoking

in that crack pipe?

Hey, who you calling

a Latin fuck, man?


There's burnt people down here,


Oh, fuck.

Damn, somebody's teeth.

Now that we're here,

we're going to need you

to sign some paperwork,

because the man

is very contagious,

and his contagiousness

could touch you.

You guys have a nice evening.

Good night.

Might you see us inside

for some hot cocoa?

Cam one, I got a good signal.

Cam two,

I got a good signal.

Oh. Oh...

Hey, hey, hey.


Stop it. Do not

do that tonight.

You don't smell that?

Oh, yeah, I smell it.

It stinks.


I'm gonna have

some Pepto.

This dude hasn't

been embalmed yet.

What the hell

you talking about?

What they do, they stick

a tube down your throat

and they just suck out

all the gunk and bile,

because what happens is

your body'll get gaseous

and you'll decompose,

and they don't want

that shit to happen

before your family

see you.

Mike, I really don't need

to know that now.

They sew your mouth closed.

They got to get all

of that out,

because a lot of times,

dead people'll fart.

That shit'll clear

a funeral home out.

How do you know

all that?

Oh, Learning Channel.

That shit got me.

Oh, shit.

You're not even gonna

warm up to it?

Hey! Do some cop work.

He's a human being.

Check the casket.

Why don't you check his spine

while you're in there?

I'm retching...



Have some dignity.

I ain't doing nothing.

Cover her titties up.

Like, what am I gonna do

with these big-ass dead titties?

But you're looking, though.

There's...Something's wrong

with your brain.

Just cover the titties.



Damn. This nicer

than some cribs.

She's going to Cuba.

Who's top cop now? Huh?

That's what I'm talking about.

See? There you go.

That's it right there.

Take a picture of the money,

then check this body.

Nah, I'm gonna count these.

You know?

Check the body.

I'm gonna check the body, Mike.

I'm not rushing into it,

that's all.

This one's going to

a mortuary in L.A.

I'm gonna check this one.

That's that bullshit

that I be

talking about.

Mike, the motherfucking head

fell off.

Come here.


I'm back in Hoo!

Think I got something.

Feels like a bag.

Shit, no, it's his kidney.

I smell dead people.

Drugs and money.

We got him, baby.

This dude is loaded.

Bet he thinks

he's a damn genius,

transporting them

in dead bodies, huh?

Let's get this body.

Mike, you've

got company, man.

Somebody's coming. Hide.

Give me the X.

Give me the X.

You gotta stall them.


Hide! Hide! Hide!


Punk kids do this?

Go check it out.


Marcus! Why would you...?

That's just not smart, man.

You tell Theresa,

I'll kill you.

Bimbo's next.

Oh, God. Not that.

Not the bimbo.

Let's hurry this shit up.


We got a big problem.

We got a big, big problem.

Drive that ambulance

into the building right now.

Crash that ambulance

into the building!

No, no. Not me, baby.

I got too many crashes

on my file. You do it.

No, no, man.

You're kidding.

I got red-flagged by

administration last month

for the thing, you know?

You know how much the city

had to pay for that.

I can't have another

ding on my file.

Mike, my man, we want to

help you out here, you know,

but we got a couple

of administration problems

over here, you know

what I'm talking about,

so how about we give you

sirens and

some flashing lights?

Make a racket. How's that?

Negative! Negative!

Crash that ambulance

into the building right now!

We want to help the team out

and everything, but...

but I'm not getting

suspended for this.

Okay, I plan on

whupping y'all asses

the second I get out of here.

Crash that ambulance into

the building right now!

Screw it. Just the price

of cop business, my man.

Now, get her on the table.

Oh, my God.

What the hell? I'm so... I'm so...

That's tragic, man.

Go, go, go. Back door's clear.

Go! Go!

Get up, Marcus!

The gas got stuck.

I didn't mean to.

Oh, man.

Supple leather, you know?

You ever rub your leather?

You know, like, just rub it,

see how good it feels?

What does love

mean to you, Mike?

Don't worry about me

and my love.

Look, I got plenty of love

in my life.

Like a woman's butt.

Don't do that.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Mike.

Let's just concentrate

and get this warrant.

I need to express

right now...

I want you to know,

if this is our last job,

I really appreciate you.


No, this is not gay shit.

This is man shit.

You know what I mean?

And you a beautiful man.

You know?

And when you let

the beautiful side...


Look at your pupils.

How am I look at

my pupil? What, I'm...

Yo, what are you taking?

Did you take some of that X?

Hey, look, give me a hug.

Hey, get off. Listen,

listen. Listen!

We need this warrant.

Do not fuck this up.

Pull yourself together.

Arr! Arr!

Evening, captain.


So, how do you two plan

to fuck up my evening tonight?

Well, captain, believe me,

we would not be here...

if it weren't seriously,

utterly important.

Get in here.

Get off me!

Ho, ho, ho, Cap,

this is beautiful.

Have such a warm feel,

you know?

Sort of like a ving shwa.

What's it, Mike?

Mike, it was a V,

like a von schwo.

Why don't you have a seat?

Or ven wangs, or...

Feng shui.

Von sway.

You have a von sway home.

Make yourself at home.

All right, captain,

I know you said that

Johnny Tapia was hands-off...

but, captain,

we got him. It's a wrap.

Look, we messed up today,

but we got him.

Please just look.

How do I move it?

Here, you can go flip

through the pictures.

You can flip...You can

flip through picture...

This is horrible.


Take the picture.

You can look

really close, Cap.

Listen, we got everything

that we need

to take this dude.

Oh, God. Oh.

They're taking

the organs out.

Right there you can...

You can...

If you look there...

Oh, gosh. Oh.

Oh, this is good.

That's horrible.



Look at this.

Everybody just needs

to relax.

Whoosah. Whoosah. Whoosah.

What are you doing?

Marcus, it's 2 a.m.

Get your hands off me.


Oh, remember we said

we were gonna...

call Vargas and Reyes?

No, I don't...

Call Vargas!

Tell him the thing

we said to tell him.

What thing?

Tell him we said...

About yesterday.

And tell him

about the thing.

So, captain, listen,

we've also got videotape.

Yesterday, we fucked up bad.

But we got him now.

Oh, shit.


No, a lot of times

with these...

Oh, shit!

What? Did I erase it?

No. We got video.

We got fucking...

Oh. Let me see.

Oh, shit.

Captain, he's shipping

the drugs around the country

in dead bodies.

We found coffins full

of cash tagged for Cuba.

And you think Tapia's

about to move out

with all this money?

I love it when you

call me Bunny Nose.


Yeah, I do, girl.

You should see this sexy shit

I got on.

Who the hell are you

talking to?

I talked to Vargas and...


They said that

they're down for whatever.

This is a nice fish, you know?

Big fucking eyes,

but a nice fucking fish.

We need this

warrant, captain.

Let's take this scumbag down.

What the fuck

is going on?

He, uh, ingested X.

You okay, pal?

Take it easy.

Okay, thank you.

Poison lady says we

gotta keep him cool.

Otherwise, he's burning up,

he can get brain damage.

Nobody'll even notice that.

Mike, I got an erection.

Ho...Take me home.


Call the wife,

tell her I'm on the way.


Hope you guys hear me.

We got her. Loud and clear.

She's in.


Palm Mortuary, Alpha team.

Tapia's mansion, Delta.

Dixie Boy boat dock, Bravo.

Coast Guard gunships,

anything that hits the water.

We hit all three places


Tac up at 0845.

We go hot at 0900 sharp.

Bring the noise.

You're such a beautiful girl.

Thank you.



Is she a Negro?

Please, Mama!

Shut up!

Get out of here!


You make your bed,

you sleep in it!

You take risks. I like that.


maybe I'm the one taking

a risk on you. Huh?


Excuse me, boss.

We need to talk now.

Whoa, something's

going on outside.


What the fuck

do you mean, cops?

Goddamn it.

Whoa. DEA. You guys aren't

planning on going in there,

are you?

Slow down, there, cowboy.

We have a warrant.

I've got a UC inside.

She's gotta come out first.

You got two minutes, my man.

Call her on her cell.

Yes, sir.

Cut the power to the house.

You got her?

No, sir.

Well, let's go.

We got a bogey

in front of the house.


This is for you, Josef,

and me and Mother Russia.

They're not gangbanger

homeys, boss.

They're cops.


They weren't trying

to hit the load.

I think they were

looking after her.

Now, you tell me...

where is the wire?

They made her.

We gotta get her out.

Go! Go! Come on!

Hey, Tapia, you fucking mother.


The Russian Grim Reaper is here.

Everything's in here.

Oh, shit. Goddamn.

Eyeball, has anything

left this mortuary

in the past two hours?

A four-hearse

funeral just left.

We trailed them

to Miami Harbor.

Miami Air, Tapia's running

his money to Cuba.

Get us a chopper!

Hey, Tapia!

You scared of me,

you little scumbag?

We got some heat.

Pull the car back.

I'll fucking kill you!

Hey, who the hell are you?

Drop the weapon!

Drop the weapon now!

I'm with you guys!

Put it down, now!

I'm over here!

Shut up!

I'm with you!

I'll kill that son of a bitch!

This is Alpha.

Heads up to the Coast Guard

Sharks and Bravo Team.

Lock down the harbor.

Freeze any boat on the move.

This is Bravo.

We got a go-fast

slinging a high rate of speed

down Miami harbor.

Stop that boat.

This guy's moving us.

Think we're going

for the bridge.

Coast Guard, we're going in.

Miami Police.

Shut it down.

This is the police.

Shut it down.


Watch out, he's got a weapon


Bail out!

Coast Guard, take him down.

Burn him.

Vessel is dead in the water.

Vessel is dead in the water.

This is what we do.

Oh, man, it's full up.

It's full up.

It's a righteous bust.

How the hell they slip away?

Give me the watch commander

on the horn.

Do you know her brother

on Miami PD?

Find him.

Do you know anyone

who might want

to save your life?




Marcus, they...!

You have

$100 million of mine...

and I want it back

in 48 hours.

Shit just got real.

Jack Snell, DEA.

Agent Eames, FBI,

who has just

informed me

that satellite

has pinpointed Tapia's jet

in Cuban airspace

about 20 minutes ago.


The United States

does not negotiate

with any hostage-takers,


Cuban hostage-takers.

It's a delicate situation.

This is not just a situation.

This is my sister.

Off the record,

all our agencies

in the State Department

are using all their

back-channel contacts

for a diplomatic solution.

You know, by the time

y'all finish being diplomatic...

my sister could be

in a fucking box.

This is bullshit.

He ain't getting away

from us that easy.

We ride together...

we die together.

Bad boys for life.

We just gotta do it ourselves,


I don't know you.

You look like you're about

to do something stupid.

I'm in.

Dodd here tell you

how fucking crazy

us ex-Delta guys are?

Marcus, my brother,

Tito, lives in Cuba.

He's a little crazy,

but he's hooked up

with the underground.

Weapons, men, a safe house.

Whatever we need.

You can forget about passports,

baby, and all that stuff,

because if the Cubans catch us,

we're all dead.

My brother Tito's

in Alpha 66,

the Anti-Castro Underground.

What does that have to do

with Tapia?

Everything. Johnny Tapia's

the biggest supplier

of drug cash to Castro,

so Alpha 66 will be

all over him.

No, listen, brother,

that is perfect.

Hey, guys. He says he can get

men on the tunnel right away.

MIKE: Let me

holler at him.

Tito, we need layout, security,

the whole deal.

We got info that Tapia's

got a casket coming in

tomorrow at 4:00 p.m.

Yeah, that might be our way in.


CAPTAIN: Brought you

a little care package

from my friends over at the CIA.

They want to help...

and don't ask me.

They're spies.

Former Delta Intel and Demo,

requesting permission

to tag along.

Ronnie, I hear

there's a boat on fire

off the coast of Cuba.

Don't you think

we ought to break

international waters

to help them out?

That's my dawg.

Point of no return.

I want to thank y'all

from the bottom of my heart.

Mike, look, I just...

Tell me when we get back.

I got the target in sight.

I see the boat.

Roger. Target 12 o'clock.

300 yards.

Roper in the door. Stand by.

Go! Go! Go!


Welcome to Cuba. Vamos.

Damn. What's up

with the safe house

right across the street

from Tapia's crib?

This is the last place

anyone would look.

We have been

watching the place.

Guards play soccer

every day around 3:30.

The bad news?

Everyone around here knows

he uses the army

like his own bodyguards.

This is Tapia's


Wow. CIA hooked us up, huh?

Yeah. This LIDAR

laser technology

even shows his escape tunnel.

The alarm security

is wired to the army,

so we're severely screwed

if we don't blow up

this security room

before we make a move.

The tunnel we're digging

branches off...

one under his backyard,

and the other into

his escape tunnel.

We gotta hurry up.

See? I told you my brother

was a maniac.

How we looking?

Let me check it out.

Papi, you look like Jesus.

Why they call this

The Last Supper?

It was the last time

they were all together

before Jesus was crucified.


Hold your ears.

Hey, you.

Listen to me.

This is fucking depressing!

You understand?

I mean, who had

this fucking idea?

I just want little angels

looking down on me.

Okay, here's the ocean,

300 yards from Tapia's house.

We're here. Safe house.

First tunnel

comes through to here.

First team's going to pop out

and take out

the security station.

Second tunnel comes through

into the center of the house.

Tito, your contacts inside

said Syd's in

the last bedroom

on the second floor,


Lupe is one of us.

If she says

your sister's there...

she is there.

Three o'clock sharp,

the bag of cats and iguanas

go over the fence,

so hopefully,

they'll make the motion

detectors go so crazy

that security'll

just shut them off.

TITO: My guys will watch

the outside

for any military.

If they come, that's bad.

Let's make this count, guys.

We're in.


Goddamn it, it's

the fifth time today.

Carlos, turn off

the motion sensors

till we get it fixed.

Papi, look what I found.

Can I keep them?


All right, guys...

sensors are down.

Time to move.

We are 100% go.

Let's go.

Left. Left. Yeah. There we go.

There. This is not as easy

as it looks.

Okay, we're at the T.

Split right.

Good luck, guys.

Find the soccer game.

Sniff it out, baby.

Sniff it out.

To the left. To the left.

Oh, shit.

Oh, you did not see me.

You did not see me.

Ready to bust into

the escape tunnel.

There we go. Soccer.



Go, go, go, go, go!


Get me the American bitch.

Call General Santos.

Tell him I need him now!

Sorry, darling.

Take her outside to safety.

Come on.

Carlos, this is not good!

I know!

Where is General Santos?

He's coming.

He's coming, boss.

You fucking maricons!

I'm gonna blow your head off!

What's happened to this gun?

My son is going to slice you

into chorizo.

Mama, I'm very sorry.

You little puta!

Vargas, you in?

We got Mama and the girl.

We're entering the house. Go!

Move! Move! Move!

Everything's clear outside.

You got 30 seconds max.

Haul ass.

Be advised you got two rovers

on the balcony.

I can't get a shot off.


See the rover? I missed him!

I missed him!

Get down!

Get down now!

Get down! Down!

Move! Move! Move!


Come on!

Move! We got the package.

Okay, guys, you've

got to move now.

It's turning into

a real bad day.

Vargas, we're coming back.

Cover us!

We got you covered

right here, baby.

Somebody talk to me.

What's going on, guys?

The military is everywhere.

This is bad. I have to go.

Guys, listen, you have

a lot of company.

Get out of there now!

I'm hit! I'm hit!

Head for the tunnel.

I'll blow this thing!

Go, go! Get out!

Mike, Mike, please, man,

you gotta get out.

Vargas! Get out! Get out!


We're not going to make it

to the tunnel! Go to plan B.

We're going to plan B!

What plan B?!

You don't pay attention to shit!

What's the plan B?

That's your goddamn problem!

Are you fucking shitting me?

Let's go!

You follow me! Follow me!

Plan B? What the hell

is plan B?

Tito, what you doing here?

You need a Cuban

guide, fool.

This way!

They're not going to

make it to the tunnel.

Let's blow out of here!

Let's blow out of here!

Keys, keys, keys!

Oh, my God! No! God!

Oh, my God!

Plan B did not have

that big-ass gun in it!

You call this plan B?!

What the plan B

stand for? Bullshit!

Do you want to drive?

Yeah, pull over

by the motherfuckers

with the machine guns!



I am not to be fucked with!

I guess I missed

the part of the meeting

when you drive through

the dining room?

And right out

the front door.

Get in the truck!

Cuban army was everywhere.

Gotta get us to

Guantanamo Bay, Tito!

No, no, no. You can't just drive

onto a U.S. Naval base.

Hey, we're Americans, okay?

Hey, Marcus, you know how

when we usually

get in these


I'm always trying to

make you feel better,

like we'll be all right,

like we're going to make it?

Yeah, yeah.

I could say it,

but that'd be a bunch

of bullshit today.

Military, military.

Which way?

No, right! Right!

Go right!

These are drug dealer shacks.

They make cocaine here.

A lot of shit in there

that likes to blow.

Faster! I'm gonna kill you,


I'm gonna go for it.

This is a big-ass hill.

Oh, shit! Is this still

called plan B?

No, this is definitely plan C.

God! God!

All right, everybody start

shooting at somebody!

Shoot! Shoot!

Shit! I'm out!

I got two rounds left.

One in the chamber.

I'm out.

All these guns and none

of you got no bullets?

I got one in my hip!

Oh, God, he's hit!

There! Gitmo!

U.S. soil, baby. U.S. soil.

Come on! Go! Go!


Americans on the way!

Americans on the way!

Run it! Run it!


Go! Go! Go!




We're Americans!

I pay my motherfucking taxes!

Shoot them!

Hey, fucking gringo.

Drop the gun!

Put it down! Put it down!

They can't help you.

You're staying in Cuba.


You are standing

on a live minefield!

Do not move!

Look, why don't we all go home...

Well, we'll go home,

you go to a hotel.

Let's work this shit out

another day,

because none of us is having

a good day right now.

Give me the gun!

Okay. I'll toss it

right at your feet...

right next to the mine.

Now, that's how

you supposed to shoot!

From now on,

that's how you shoot!

Oh, I want my next partner

to shoot just like that.

It take

a dysfunctional motherfucker

to bust somebody in the head

like that.

That's some dysfunctional shit.

My next partner

gonna invite me to his barbecues

and shit, though.

Come here, girl. Come here.

I came all the way to Cuba

for this.

Come on.

Y'all gotta do that

around land mines?

Would you tell them that

that shit is dangerous

around these land mines?


You know, Mike,

this ain't easy for me,

but I was wrong.

I'll be very proud for you

to date my sister.

Thanks, man.

All right.

You know, me and Syd

thought about it,

and your behavior was so crazy

that whatever magic

we could've captured,

probably best if we didn't know.

Are you're just gonna

take advantage

of my little sister?

Already you breaking her heart?

What you talking about?

What, she not good

enough for you, Mike?

Syd, Mike says

you ain't shit!

Now, why would you scream out

some crazy nonsense like that?

You know, I don't appreciate

you coming over here,

disrespecting me in my new pool.

I bought your new pool.

Why don't you hook this pool up

to your Ferrari

and drag this motherfucker

out of here?

First of all, I was joking

with you.

And second of all,

all this right here,

smell yourself right now,

because this moment is

what the fuck is wrong with you.

I got the transfer papers

in the trash can.

I'll get them and glue them

the fuck up.

Glue them up, Marcus.

You want some glue?

Then we won't be partners

no more.

I got glue in the car.

I'm trying to talk to you.

It's hot, I feel like

I'm cooking in this fucker...

and I gotta hear

some shit out of you?

And on top of that shit,

you gonna dawg my baby sister?

Oh, this that bullshit!

Dad! Dad!

I kept the warranty.

I kept the warranty!

♪ Bad boys, bad boys

What you gonna do? ♪

♪ What you gonna do

When we come for you? ♪

♪ Mucka tyze stickm no

Hey ♪

♪ Bad boys, bad... ♪

♪ ...hey ♪

Come on, man, you gotta

learn the words.

Mike, you don't know

the damn words either.

♪ Bad boys, bad boys

What you gonna do? ♪

♪ What you gonna do

When they come for you? ♪

♪ Bad boys, bad boys

What you gonna do? ♪

♪ What you gonna do

When they come for you? ♪♪


♪ Uh! ♪

♪ Nigga, what? Nigga, huh? ♪

♪ Shoot 'em up, bang, bang

Yeah, it's a cold thang ♪

♪ Diddy want Doggy to get

In my baby body man ♪

♪ Diddy got it, man

Tryin' a feel up his body man ♪

♪ With a lot of thing

Fuck the nigga home ♪

♪ A matter fact

He gettin' potty trained ♪

♪ Livin' with his mama, man ♪

♪ Stressed and pain, no gain ♪

♪ No fame, for a nigga

Like the D-O ♪

♪ Put a couple holes

In your loud mouth zero ♪

♪ If you step to us

You'll get fucked up quick ♪

♪ We can protect what us

That what we bustin' bitch ♪

♪ Niggaz be talkin' shit

But they be walkin' away ♪

♪ When I pull out my nine

And pop some times ♪

♪ When you see my clique in this

Bitch we kickin' it ♪

♪ Dogg's be rippin' this

Slip a clip in it ♪

♪ Flip the script

And then ♪

♪ I'm the rap nigga

Bangin' that here ♪

♪ And you don't quit ♪

♪ Ride to the rhythm

With some gangster shit ♪

♪ And you don't stop ♪

♪ Nigga, what? Nigga, huh? ♪

♪ And you don't quit ♪

♪ Ride to the rhythm

With some gangsta shit ♪

♪ And you don't stop ♪

♪ Nigga, what? Nigga, huh? ♪

♪ Nigga, what? Nigga, huh? ♪

♪ Nigga, what? Nigga, huh? ♪

♪ Nigga, what?

Doggystyle, Bad Boy ♪

♪ And you don't quit ♪

♪ Ride to the rhythm

With some gangsta shit ♪

♪ And you don't stop ♪♪

♪ Baby don't, don't go ♪

♪ You know I need you so ♪

♪ Sometimes my pride

Gets in the way ♪

♪ I say things

That I don't mean ♪

♪ When I think

You're hurting me ♪

♪ I love you more and more

Each day, each day ♪

♪ I didn't, I didn't mean

To make you cry ♪

♪ I don't want, I don't want you

To say goodbye ♪

♪ I didn't, I didn't mean

To make you sad ♪

♪ You're the best love

I've ever had ♪

♪ And nothin', nothin's gonna

Tear us apart ♪

♪ And for this

For this love we work so hard ♪

♪ And can we, can we try

To work it out ♪

♪ I'm yours all yours

Without a doubt ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Oh ♪♪