Arena (1989) - full transcript

Steve Armstrong is a human short-order cook in a fast food restaurant on a "starstation" where the most popular arena fighting tournament in the whole galaxy is held. Members of various alien species fight one on one, often dirty, to become the ruling champions of the galaxy. The restaurant's sole waiter and Steve's boss is Shorty, a short four-armed scheming humanoid alien. When Steve saves Shorty from a particularly unpleasant and violent alien guest, they're both fired by the restaurant's automated A.I. for brawling. Shorty shows gratitude and they become friends. However, without jobs, they'll both be kicked off the space station. Thankfully, Quinn, a human female no-nonsense fighting promoter, who's in quick need of new fighters, hears about Steve's fight with the alien guest and offers him sponsorship. Human fighters have traditionally been defeated easily by naturally tougher alien fighters in previous tournaments and Steve would be a real underdog. Shorty manages to convince Steve to take the offer and after some initial difficulties, Steve proves to be a really tough fighter with an actual tiny chance of success. In the eyes of humans all across the galaxy, who feel inferior to the various alien races, Steve becomes their idol and champion of humanity. Steve doesn't really want all this attention, but he understands the hope people put in him. Rogor is the tournament's crooked organizer, who's complete control over the competition and the players is shaken by Steve's surprising success. He offers one of his deals to Steve as well, but he refuses. Rogor then comes up with a plan to get rid of Steve for good, if he gets to the finals. Rogor's rat-faced yesman Weezil is eager to help. Meanwhile, beautiful Jade attracts Steve's attention.

Announcer: ...comes back with a biting right hook.

Spinner's hurt. He staggers back. Horn's on him again.

( speaking alien language )

Announcer: He got him! Horn Horn Horn!

( speaking alien language )

Announcer: ...better opponent than this.

Horn, the six-time undefeated champion

is giving Spinner the beating of his life.

It's hard to believe the once unbeatable Spinner

could look so terrible.

( crowd cheering )

UPPER CUT, SPINNER. COME ON.

MOVE MOVE. KEEP MOVING.

( grunting )

Announcer: Spinner, the once impressive contender,

is simply no match for the six-time champion Horn.

Spinner is just a pathetic shadow of his former self.

And the crowd doesn't like it.

Horn is relentless. He won't let up.

He's already broken a record...

- THREE, FIVE AND A SEVEN.
- LET'S HAVE A THREE, FIVE AND A SEVEN.

HUSTLE, ROOKIE!

COMING UP, COMING UP. HOLD YOUR THRUSTERS.

( crowd booing )

Man: YOU BETTER GET BACK TO THE SCRAP HEAP, PAL!

- LET'S HAVE A THREE, FIVE AND A SEVEN.
- NO PROBLEM!

BE RIGHT WITH YOU. YES, WHERE'S THAT FIVE?

HIT HIM IN THE RIBCAGE. COME ON, RIBCAGE, SPINNER.

( buzzer sounds )

- Woman: Score point to Horn.
- Horn: HORN!

Scoring now stands: Horn two,

Spinner zero.

HORN!

Announcer: Should he be allowed to go another round?

And what about Horn?

A champion, yes. A crowd pleaser, absolutely.

But is he a sportsman? To that I say no.

Woman: In order to balance strength between species,

the Arena uses the Seiko 3000 handicapping system.

The handicappers decrease a fighter's strength

keeping the match competitive

with the fighters evenly classed.

Horn is fighting at a disadvantage rating of .25 krell

( beeps )

- HOW'S IT GOING, SPINNER?
- NEXT ROUND IS MINE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? CAN YOU GO ANOTHER POINT?

HE'S LOST A LOT OF HYDROLENE FLUID.

- I MEAN, I CAN REPLACE--
- IF IT'S THE ONLY WAY, JUST DO IT.

OKAY, BOSS.

( beeps ) WEEZIL?

( wheezing alien language )

( cackling )

WEEZIL, WHERE ARE YOU?

- Weezil?
- RIGHT HERE, MR. ROGOR.

Listen to me. Do it.

RIGHT AWAY, SIR.

HERE YOU ARE. RIGHT, MAY I HELP YOU?

HEY, WHERE'S MY SEVEN?

I'M GOING AS FAST AS I CAN.

HEY, ROOKIE, WHERE'S THAT SEVEN?

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
- OH, SLUDGE!

( whispering )

RIGHT ARM. DON'T LET THEM SEE.

Woman: Five seconds...

I'LL KILL THAT SON OF A JUNKYARD BITCH.

COMING UP, COMING UP, COMING UP.

- HERE, HERE YOU GO.
- HEY, SPEED IT UP, SLAG.

I'VE ONLY GOT FOUR HANDS!

( screams )

( buzzer sounds )

Woman: Point and match to Horn.

- ( audience screaming )
- OUT OF MY WAY!

I'LL KILL YOU!

GET HIM OFF HIM!

WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

Woman: Please remain seated.

There is no cause for alarm.

Crowd control unit 105,

please report to grandstand section 42 immediately.

QUINN, CALL SECURITY. QUICK!

- I DON'T BELIEVE THIS. WHERE'S THE COMMISSIONER?
- QUINN, I'M TRYING--

Commissioner Dent to the red com line please.

( screaming ) QUINN!

NOW LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING:

WE DID NOT LOSE. WE WERE VICTIMIZED.

Horn is an animal who should not be allowed in the ring.

Reporter: Do you plan to file a formal complaint for the commission?

Quinn: Commission? What commission?

Where is Commissioner Dent anyway?

When is he gonna start outlawing this kind of brutality?

Alien: COME ON, COME ON.

LISTEN, NEBULITE, WE'RE NOT WAITING FOREVER.

HEY, YOU WANNA EAT THIS FOOD OR WEAR IT?

YOU CAN'T TALK TO US THAT WAY. DAD!

WE MISSED THAT K.O. BECAUSE OF THIS FREAK.

FREAK? LISTEN TO ME, YOU LITTLE TADPOLE.

YOU ARE A VERY RUDE YOUNG MAN. HEY!

HEY, NO NO NO!

- HEY, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!
- LEAVE HIM ALONE!

YOU KNOW, WHERE I COME FROM, WE TEACH OUR KIDS MANNERS.

LAST TIME I SAW A FACE LIKE THAT, IT HAD A HOOK IN IT.

- ( laughs )
- EARTHLING, HUH?

( woman screams )

Woman: IS HE OKAY?

YEAH, WHAT A FIGHT.

Woman on P.A.: Attention snack bar 21 personnel.

You are in violation of your service contracts.

Employment is terminated.

HEY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

- I FOUND OUT ONE THING, SHORTY.
- WHAT'S THAT?

I'M NOT CUT OUT TO BE A SHORT-ORDER COOK.

WHO WAS?

YOU ALL RIGHT? CAN YOU HEAR US?

DID YOU SEE THE WAY HE HIT VANG?

( dings )

SORRY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BACK THERE.

YOU DIDN'T PUNCH ANYBODY. FORGET IT.

YEAH, BUT IF I HADN'T SHOT MY BIG MOUTH OFF--

TALKING IS NO CRIME. FORGET ABOUT IT.

- I CAN'T FORGET ABOUT IT. I'M A NEBULITE.
- SO?

WHAT, WERE YOU CLONED YESTERDAY? A NEBULITE NEVER FORGETS.

HONOR DEMANDS I REPAY THE FAVOR.

NO, JUST FORGET ABOUT IT, WILL YOU?

WAIT A MINUTE. YOU DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND.

YOU MAY NEED MY HELP.

WITHOUT A JOB ON THE STAR STATION,

YOU COULD BE DEPORTED FOR VAGRANCY.

- HEY, SHUT UP!
- ( grunts )

SHORTY, THAT WOULD SUIT ME JUST FINE.

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THIS STAR STATION.

I JUST WANNA GO BACK TO EARTH.

THEN I'LL PAY YOU BACK BY HELPING YOU GET THERE.

Woman: Invalid entry. Please check with a crib-tender.

- WHAT NOW?
- WHAT'S WRONG?

- I said invalid entry.
- I DON'T KNOW.

EXCUSE ME. MY KEY-- IT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE WORKING.

YOUR CRIB HAS BEEN FOLDED.

FOR WHAT? FOLDED FOR WHAT?

YOU LOST YOUR JOB

AND WE NEVER GOT THE REST OF YOUR DEPOSIT.

- NO, WAIT A MINUTE.
- SORRY.

( laughs )

WHERE IN THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP NOW?

I GOT A PLACE.

COME ON.

TRY BYPASSING THE E.D. SYSTEM COMPLETELY.

ALL RIGHT, HAND ME THE SPOT WELD.

TRY IT NOW.

NO, IT AIN'T GONNA WORK.

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?

CAN'T YOU FIX ME?

Wayne: THE L-3 ARM IS TOTALLY SHOT.

THE INTEROCITOR UNIT AND THE MAGNA THRUSTER'S

COMPLETELY BURNED OUT.

SORRY, KID, BUT I'M AFRAID YOUR FIGHTING DAYS ARE OVER.

- NO!
- HEY, COME ON.

ALL HE NEEDS IS A MICRO-RELAY.

YEAH, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH THAT COSTS?

DON'T RETIRE ME.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, SPINNER.

WE'RE NOT GONNA GIVE UP ON YOU YET, OKAY?

RIGHT?

OKAY.

MAYBE WHEN VANG TAKES THE QUARTER-FINALS,

WE'LL HAVE THE MONEY.

QUINN.

VANG, WHAT HAPPENED?

AN EARTHLING, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED.

( sighs )

LOOK, WHY SHOULD YOU SLEEP ON THE FLOOR

WHEN I'VE GOT A PERFECTLY GOOD PLACE?

DON'T BE CRAZY.

Woman: ...will be departing from outer platform space lock B

due to repairs on space lock A.

All freighters will depart from outer platform space lock M

until further notice.

OKAY, HERE WE ARE.

- IN THERE?
- UH-HUH.

I WOULDN'T WANNA PUT YOU OUT, SHORTY.

HEY, AFTER WHAT YOU DID FOR ME...

APRES VOUS.

OKAY.

YEAH, HERE.

- NICE BASEMENT.
- GO ON IN.

YEAH, IT'S DARK IN HERE, SHORTY.

BLACK AS PITCH FROM POLE TO POLE.

OH, SORRY ABOUT THAT.

MISSING RUNGS.

YOU MEAN, THERE ARE MORE?

YEAH, WELL, THE MAINTENANCE CREWS DON'T GET IN HERE MUCH.

YOU FIRST. COME ON.

I'M COMING IN.

( speaking alien language )

( grunting )

SHORTY, DO ME A FAVOR, WOULD YOU?

ANYTHING, KID. I OWE YOU, REMEMBER?

LET'S CONSIDER THIS YOUR WAY OF REPAYING ME IN FULL.

NO NO, I'M NOT GONNA LET YOU GET AWAY WITH LETTING ME OFF THAT EASY.

( sighs ) THAT'S WHAT I WAS AFRAID OF.

LET'S GO, ROOKIE.

( grunts )

WELCOME TO MY WORLD.

- WHAT IS THIS PLACE?
- THE TUBES.

I HEARD ABOUT THIS PLACE, BUT I DIDN'T THINK THAT IT--

THAT IT EXISTED? I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING, YOUNG MAN:

MANY PEOPLE DON'T HAVE ANYPLACE ELSE TO GO.

HEY, MARCUS.

YOU'RE WEARING WENDELL'S ROBE, MY FRIEND.

WENDELL WENT UNDER THIS MORNING.

- AH.
- HIS LUNGS.

IT'S ALWAYS THE GOOD ONES, EH?

HE WAS THE GREATEST, DAMN IT.

HE WAS THAT. COURAGE, MY FRIEND.

HEY, SHORTY, WAS THAT MARCUS DIABLO?

THE SAME.

HE WAS THE LAST HUMAN CHAMPION.

THAT WAS, WHAT, 50 YEARS AGO?

ALL THOSE GUYS WERE CONTENDERS.

THAT WAS WHEN THE GAME MEANT SOMETHING. NOW IT MEANS NOTHING.

- OH.
- I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN A PART OF IT.

- WHAT MAKES YOU SUCH AN EXPERT, ROOK?
- ARE YOU KIDDING?

I'VE SEEN EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MARCUS'S FIGHTS ON RETRANSMISSION.

IT WAS STILL A SPORT WHEN HE FOUGHT.

THERE'S A LOT OF DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOOKING AND FIGHTING, ROOKIE.

NO, WAIT A SECOND. THERE'S SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME.

- I AM A FIGHTER.
- UH-HUH.

I FOUGHT ON THE HUMAN CIRCUIT. I WAS RANKED.

- I WON A LOT OF FIGHTS.
- HMM.

I HAD THIS DREAM THAT ONE DAY,

I COULD COME UP HERE AND FIGHT IN THE ARENA.

THERE'S JUST NO ROOM FOR REAL FIGHTERS UP HERE ANYMORE.

AT LEAST, NOT FOR HUMANS, THAT'S FOR SURE.

THIS WAY.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT, SHORTY.

YOU'VE GOT A JOB. WHY DO YOU LIVE DOWN HERE?

( chuckles ) I HAD A JOB,

AND I SEND ALL MY MONEY HOME

TO MY FAMILY ON NEBULAR.

SO YOU'RE A FAMILY MAN FROM NEBULAR.

- EXACTLY.
- HOW MANY KIDS YOU GOT?

- 27.
- 27?

( laughs )

HOLD IT. I LOCKED THIS.

WAIT, I'LL GO.

LET GO! COME ON!

SHORTY, IT'S ME. IT'S ME AND THE SKULL.

HEY, STEVE, IT'S ALL RIGHT.

LET HIM UP. IT'S OKAY.

WHO'S THE MUSCLE?

HE COULD HAVE HURT THE SKULL, THEN WHAT?

HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?

THE SKULL KNOWS ALL. GOT A NEW SCAM NOW, SHORTY.

- THE BIGGEST. YOU IN? HE CAN BE IN TOO.
- ( laughing )

SOMETHING FUNNY, LAUGHING BOY?

GET THIS, THE FIX IS ON ALREADY.

NUMBER 12 FREEZER CABLE-- I PULLED IT.

SKULL AND I GOT BIG PLANS, SHORTY. BIG PLANS.

- FOR WHAT?
- WHAT?

WHAT, HE SAYS. THE FIGHTS, MAN.

FIX THE FIGHTS. THE FORTUNE'S OURS, SHORTY.

GO HOME, SKULL. GO HOME.

BIG MISTAKE, SHORTY.

BIG MISTAKE.

WHEN I'M RICH, YOU'LL BE CRYING.

SURE, SKULL.

THAT'S THE TROUBLE WITH LIVING IN THE TUBES.

THERE'S TOO MANY WEIRDOS.

IT'S REALLY NOT THAT BAD THOUGH.

COME ON, YOU BUNK HERE.

AND WHAT ABOUT YOU?

LOOK, YOU'RE THE GUEST. I'LL BE ALL RIGHT.

OKAY.

BUT THIS DEFINITELY PUTS US EVEN ON THE FAVORS.

NOT ON YOUR LIFE. YOU'RE NOT EVEN CLOSE.

NIGHT.

- ( sizzling )
- ♪TWELVE MOONS SHINING BRIGHT ♪

♪TWELVE MOONS, IMAGINE OUR SURPRISE... ♪

( singing in alien language )

YOU KNOW, SHORTY,

IT'S NOT BAD DOWN HERE.

IT'S THE BEST I'VE SLEPT IN A WEEK.

HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?

SHORTY, EGGS ARE EXPENSIVE. WE'RE OUT OF WORK.

DON'T WORRY. I GOT FRIENDS TOPSIDE.

- WE'LL GET JOBS.
- ( knocks )

- THAT MUST BE THE SKULL.
- I'LL GET IT.

HEY, TAKE IT EASY ON THE KID.

HE'S A NICE KID.

YOU'RE STEVE ARMSTRONG?

YEAH.

HEY, TAKE IT EASY!

HEY, STOP! WAIT A MINUTE, OKAY? HOLD IT!

COME ON, HOTSHOT.

Shorty: HEY HEY!

COME ON!

HEY, YOU GUYS, TAKE IT OUTSIDE, WILL YOU?

DON'T WRECK THE PLACE.

IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO PUT THIS TOGETHER. AW, COME ON!

OH, HEY!

COME ON, YOU GUYS. PLEASE.

NO, NO, NO, MY TURN.

JUST WAIT.

TAKE IT.

Man: HEY, WATCH OUT. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

THAT WAS FOR VANG.

WHO THE HELL IS VANG?

GET HIM! GET HIM!

( clamoring )

WATCH YOUR BACK, KID! LOOK OUT!

SO...

YOU'RE THE GUY WHO FED VANG A WINDOW.

WHO IN THE HELL IS VANG?

HE MUST BE THE TUNA-HEAD FROM THE STAND.

YEAH, WELL, I WAS KIND OF COUNTING ON HIM.

- FOR WHAT? BEING STUPID?
- ( chuckles )

Quinn: HE'S ONE OF MY FIGHTERS.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE WAS ONE OF MY BEST FIGHTERS.

YOU KNOW, I HEARD ABOUT YOU.

BUT I FIND IT VERY DIFFICULT TO BELIEVE--

I MEAN, AN EARTHLING WHO CAN FIGHT.

YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT THE ARENAS, STEVE?

AW, COME ON, BOSS.

IT AIN'T GONNA WORK. THIS GUY'S A HUMAN.

- HE KICKED YOUR BUTT.
- ( Shorty laughs )

AND IN CASE YOU FORGOT, VANG HAPPENED TO BE A HELL OF A FIGHTER, TOO.

YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ARENA FIGHTING. IT'S NOT FOR ME.

I WANTED IT ONCE. I TRAINED FOR IT MY WHOLE LIFE,

BUT AFTER I GOT HERE A YEAR AGO

I COULDN'T EVEN GET IN THE DOOR.

AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING--

NOW THAT I'VE SEEN IT, IT STINKS.

SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE YOUR TWO BONEHEADS HERE

AND SLIDE BACK UPSTAIRS WHERE YOU CAME FROM?

WAIT WAIT. HOLD ON. WAIT WAIT WAIT.

WAIT WAIT, CALM DOWN. JUST CALM DOWN. CALM DOWN.

MISS QUINN, AM I GIVEN TO BELIEVE

THAT YOU ARE OFFERING THIS PROSPECT A CONTRACT?

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, I MIGHT BE.

HMM.

A HUMANOID FIGHTER.

WHO COULD BELIEVE IT?

SHORTY, COME ON. THE EGGS--

- THEY'RE GETTING COLD.
- HOLD ON.

Wayne: HEY KID, YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

THOSE EGGS AREN'T THE ONLY THING THAT'S YELLOW.

Quinn: A TEMPORARY.

10 DAYS WITH AN OPTION FOR A YEAR. HOW ABOUT IT?

DEAL!

NOW WAIT A MINUTE, SHORTY.

I MIGHT WANT A TICKET OFF THIS BARGE,

BUT I DON'T HAVE TO EARN IT IN THEIR CROOKED GAME.

THAT'S NOT THE WAY I RUN MY FIGHTS, MR. ARMSTRONG.

LOOK, FINE, RUN IT ANY WAY YOU WANT,

BUT WITHOUT ME.

( door slams )

COME ON, WAYNE.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL ME WHERE YOU'RE TAKING ME?

LOOK, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. GOT ANY MONEY?

YEAH, NOT VERY MUCH, WHY?

YOU'RE RIGHT,

BUT IT'LL HAVE TO DO.

HOLD ON, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?

LOOK, YOU LOST YOUR JOB AND YOU BLEW A SHOT WITH QUINN.

AND THIS WON'T EVEN GET YOU OUT OF THE QUASAR NEBULA,

LET ALONE BACK TO EARTH.

SO YOU'VE RUN OUT OF OPTIONS, KID.

TRUST ME.

COME ON.

- PASSWORD?
- SWORDFISH.

- ( dance music playing )
- ( speaking alien language )

HEY, ALL RIGHT!

Shorty: OH, ISN'T IT GREAT?

I FEEL LUCKY TONIGHT.

SHORTY, THIS IS ALL THE MONEY I'VE GOT LEFT.

YEAH, AND IT'S PEANUTS TOO.

IN A FEW MINUTES, IT'S GONNA BE IMPORTANT DOUGH. NOW WAIT HERE.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

- MAY I TAKE A TURN PLEASE?
- HELP YOURSELF.

- ( dings )
- WINNER.

- ROLL AGAIN?
- MM-HMM.

WHERE I COME FROM, IT'S BAD LUCK

TO PLAY THE SAME GAME OF CHANCE TWICE.

WILL YOU ROLL FOR ME?

SURE.

- ( dings )
- WINNER!

WELL, YOU'RE MY LUCKY CHARM.

COME ON, LET'S GO TO THE BILOX TABLE.

WAIT.

NOT NOW, SHORTY. I'M RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING.

UH-HUH. LISTEN, FIRST WE TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS.

THEN WE SEE THE SIGHTS, OKAY?

EXCUSE ME. ARE YOU GONNA BE HERE FOR A WHILE?

AS LONG AS I'M ON A WINNING STREAK.

I GOTTA GO. I'LL BE BACK.

- HEY.
- DID YOU SEE HER?

LOOK, YOU WANNA MEET A GIRL OR WIN A TICKET HOME?

YOU SHOULD HAVE ASKED ME FIVE MINUTES AGO. NOW I'M NOT SO SURE.

OKAY, WATCH THIS. THIS IS MY GAME.

BETS IN.

RIGHT YOU ARE.

SHORTY, COME ON. AT LEAST ONLY BET HALF OF IT.

ALL RIGHT, BUT IT'LL TAKE TWICE AS LONG.

TURN YOUR CARDS.

READ 'EM AND WEEP.

SORRY, HOUSE WINS.

- ANOTHER HAND?
- YEAH, YEAH.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD ASK FOR A COUPLE NEW CARDS.

I'LL PLAY THESE.

HOUSE RAISES YOU 10 KRUGER CHIPS.

- GO OUT.
- NO WAY, I GOT HIM.

- CALL.
- TURN YOUR CARDS.

( chuckles )

SORRY, HOUSE WINS AGAIN.

( knocks )

Man: SWORDFISH.

RAID!

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

YOU'RE ALL UNDER ARREST!

- WHO THE HELL IS THAT?
- IT'S COMMISSIONER DENT.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

Officer: IF YOU RESIST ARREST

THERE WILL BE TROUBLE.

YOU ARE UNDER ARREST. STAY WHERE YOU ARE.

( screams )

Officer: YOU ARE UNDER ARREST.

WHOA!

COME ON, KID!

FORGET THE GIRL. LET'S GO!

- WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT, HUH?
- WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?

HEY, I'LL MEET YOU AT THE GUZZLE BAR IN AN HOUR.

JUST GO STRAIGHT DOWN THAT VENT. SEE YA.

WHY DID I HAVE TO GET MIXED UP WITH A NEBULITE?

( lounge music playing )

HEY, KID. HOW ARE YOU DOING?

ON MY FOURTH TANKARD, SHORTY.

LOOK, BE CAREFUL. GO SLOW ON THAT.

IT'S MELOVIAN BREW. IT'S VERY POWERFUL.

I KNOW.

SURPRISE.

( chuckles )

ONE-WAY TO EARTH?

SHORTY--

A SIMPLE "THANK YOU" WILL DO.

THANK YOU.

- WE'RE EVEN.
- ALL RIGHT, FINALLY.

( speaks alien language )

( coughs )

NOW I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS QUINN PROPOSITION.

LOOK, I DON'T WANNA HEAR ANYTHING ELSE ABOUT QUINN.

LOOK, YOU TRY IT FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, YOU CAN QUIT.

YOU'VE GOT YOUR TICKET HOME.

NO, NO WAY.

KID, YOU'RE A NATURAL.

I'VE NEVER SEEN A FASTER HUMAN IN A LONG TIME.

YOU'VE GOT SPEED, YOU'VE GOT MUSCLE--

SHORTY, NO.

ALL RIGHT.

LOOK, WE'LL HAVE A COUPLE OF DRINKS, LISTEN TO SOME MUSIC

IN HONOR OF YOUR LAST NIGHT ON THE STAR STATION.

HEY, THANKS FOR THIS THOUGH.

SAY NO MORE.

( dance music playing )

♪EVERYTHING IS CLEAR ♪

♪I NEVER REALLY KNEW MY FEARS ♪

♪I CAN'T SEE TRUE COSMIC ♪

♪MELLOW COLORS OF MY TEARS ♪

♪IT WAS SUCH A THRILL ♪

♪I LOOK UP, THE MOON IS DOWN ♪

♪HIT THE STREETS OF THE GALAXY ♪

♪LEADS ME TO THE STARS... ♪

THAT GIRL-- SHORTY, WHO IS THIS GIRL?

I DON'T KNOW. THEY PIPE THIS STUFF IN FROM HUB NINE.

♪DO DO DO DO DO DO DO... ♪

JUST KEEP WATCHING AND DON'T MOVE.

YOU'D BETTER BE PREPARED TO USE THAT THING.

- WAIT A MINUTE.
- TRY ME.

NOW YOU'RE GONNA GET UP AND MOVE SLOWLY, OKAY?

- OKAY.
- NOW, UP.

COME ON, UP.

COME ON, MOVE IT.

♪I NEVER REALLY KNEW MY FEARS. ♪

ALL RIGHT, HOLD IT RIGHT HERE. HOLD IT RIGHT HERE.

GET 'EM UP.

ALL OF THEM, NEBULITE.

ALL RIGHT, YOU PACKING ANYTHING, BIG GUY?

ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

PUT THEM DOWN. PUT THEM DOWN.

SMILE, HAVE A GOOD TIME, YEAH.

YEAH, MOVE IT, HUH? THIS WAY.

- HELLO, HOW ARE YOU?
- HI.

OKAY, MOVE. MOVE.

THESE ARE THE GUYS, MR. ROGOR.

DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?

NO, WHY, DON'T YOU? ( laughs )

HE'S ONLY KIDDING, MR. ROGOR.

HE'S DRUNK!

IT STILL PUTS ME IN BETTER SHAPE THAN ANYONE HERE.

- ( groans )
- THAT'S ENOUGH OUT OF YOU.

WHICH ONE OF THEM PINCHED MY STACK?

- YOU?
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE MEANS, MR. ROGOR.

- OH, OOH!
- WEEZIL HAS NO PATIENCE FOR LIARS.

WHO ARE YOU CALLING A LIAR? ( groans )

COME ON, COME ON.

I'LL BLOW YOU AWAY IF I HAVE TO.

Rogor: WEEZIL.

A LITTLE RESTRAINT, PLEASE.

GENTLEMEN, LET ME MAKE MY POSITION PERFECTLY CLEAR.

I WANT MY MONEY BACK.

18,000 KRUGER.

- HERE.
- SLOW.

REAL SLOW.

TAKE IT.

WE'LL CALL IT EVEN, OKAY?

THIS IS NON-REFUNDABLE

AND IT'S ONLY WORTH 13,000.

I HAD TO SEND A LITTLE DOUGH BACK TO NEBULAR.

LOOK, I'LL GET THE MONEY.

JUST GIVE ME A DAY.

I LIKE YOU.

12 HOURS.

IF YOU'RE NOT BACK BY THEN... ( pops )

- ( laughs )
- YOU UNDERSTAND?

I'LL GET THE MONEY.

DON'T WORRY. I'LL BE BACK.

I'M NOT WORRIED... YET.

WEEZIL.

COME ON.

AFTER 12 HOURS,

START CUTTING OFF HIS FINGERS--

ONE EVERY HOUR.

DON'T WORRY, MR. ROGOR.

I KNOW JUST WHAT YOU WANT.

( chuckles )

( door chiming )

Computer: Male Earth visitor.

WHO IS IT?

IT'S STEVE ARMSTRONG.

IT'S 3:00 IN THE MORNING. WHAT DO YOU WANT?

YOU STILL LOOKING FOR A FIGHTER?

- YEAH.
- I SEE YOUR FIVE, AND CALL YOU.

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO PAY TO SEE 'EM.

RAISE YOU 50.

( chuckles )

READ 'EM AND WEEP.

FOUR NOVA.

( groans ) GRAND SCUFFLE.

( chuckles ) A COUPLE MORE HANDS LIKE THIS,

WE WON'T HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE KID TO COME BACK.

JUST KIDDING. JUST KIDDING.

( door chimes )

- ( beeps )
- MR. ROGOR.

- Woman: He's busy.
- TELL HIM THE KID'S BACK.

( beeps )

WELL?

Steve: IT'S ALL THERE.

WELL, ME AND MY FRIEND HAVE SOME URGENT BUSINESS,

SO IF YOU DON'T MIND, WE'LL JUST, YOU KNOW, GO.

18,000 KRUGER IN LESS THAN AN HOUR.

YOU SHOULD BE WORKING FOR ME.

THANKS, BUT I'VE ALREADY GOT A JOB.

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen,

never have I felt the excitement as explosive

as at the Arena tonight.

For the first time in 50 years,

not since Marcus was the king,

will a human do battle in the arena.

( growling )

MR. ROGOR, LOOK.

IT'S THE EARTH GUY.

Woman: Arena fans,

coming up next on the card will be a two-point match.

THAT'S HOW HE GOT ALL THAT KRUGER.

THE LAD'S A FIGHTER.

( laughs )

The combatants will be Steve Armstrong an Earthling,

against the Sloth from Scremad.

- YOU ALL SET?
- YEAH.

NOW LOOK, DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIS SIZE.

THE HANDICAPPER'S GONNA PUT HIM AT A .6, OKAY?

LOOK, DON'T WORRY. YOU'LL GET YOUR MONEY'S WORTH, ALL RIGHT?

Five seconds to round start.

Fighters to center ring.

LET'S SEE WHAT YOU'VE LEARNED. COME ON.

Steve Armstrong will fight at full strength.

Sloth will have a .6 krell handicap.

- ( snarling )
- ( buzzer sounds )

KILL THAT SON OF A TOAD!

( buzzer sounds )

Score point to Sloth.

Quinn: GET UP THERE!

It is obvious that no human being can compete.

That's what's being proven here tonight.

I HAD NO IDEA THE KID WAS A FIGHTER.

( laughs )

YOU'RE RIGHT, BOSS.

HE AIN'T. ( laughing )

OKAY, CLEAR YOUR HEAD, KID.

LOOK, YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE?

- WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME A HINT?
- NOT FUNNY, OKAY?

IF YOU LOSE THIS ONE, THERE WON'T BE ANOTHER HUMAN CHAMPION FOR 50 YEARS.

WELL, THAT'S REAL ENCOURAGING, QUINN.

LOOK, JUST GO OUT THERE AND TAKE CONTROL, OKAY?

WHATEVER YOU DID TO VANG, GO DO IT TO SLOTH, OKAY?

RIGHT, WHEN YOU GOT INSIDE ON HIM, HE GOT REAL DEFENSIVE.

IF YOU CAN GET TO HIS SENSOR NERVE, YOU CAN WIN THIS FIGHT.

- Five seconds to round start.
- THAT'S RIGHT.

I'LL TRY TO REMEMBER THAT THE NEXT TIME HE CLOBBERS ME.

- LOOK, YOU WANNA WIN OR WHAT?
- LISTEN, I'M DOING--

- ( buzzer sounds )
- GET OUT THERE AND FIGHT!

( cackles )

YOU WANT YOUR HEAD SMASHED?

( growling )

HIT THE LITTLE GRASSHOPPER, GO AHEAD!

YOU GOT HIM! YOU GOT HIM! YOU GOT HIM!

GET AWAY FROM HIM, KID. GET AWAY!

Quinn: DON'T LET HIM CLOBBER YOU. COME ON, GET OUT OF THERE.

Sloth: I'M BEATING YOUR HEAD.

- RIGHT RIGHT. BREAK HIS KNEE!
- COME ON!

Wayne: COME ON, STEVE!

( buzzer sounds )

Score point to Armstrong.

Match even at one to one.

GOOD POINT, STEVE.

NOW YOU'RE DOING IT.

THE KID'S JUST NOT THAT GOOD.

BEGINNER'S LUCK.

This is incredible, sports fans.

It's absolutely unbelievable.

No one figured that Steve Armstrong would last this long

and be this close.

OKAY, NOW KEEP MOVING IN ON HIM, OKAY?

HE'S NOT USED TO FIGHTING SOMEBODY AS FAST AS YOU ARE,

- SO JUST GET ON HIM.
- Fighters to center ring.

THAT'S ALL YOU GOT?

COME ON, YOU CAN PUNCH BETTER THAN THAT.

COME ON, BEST SHOT.

- COME ON!
- THE OLD SENSOR NERVE, YES!

TAKE THAT AND THAT!

ANNIHILATE HIM.

HEY, WE GOTTA STOP IT. HE'S BREAKING HIS NECK.

ARE YOU CRAZY? THIS IS AN ARENA MATCH. HE'S STILL GOT A CHANCE.

- I'M GONNA CALL THE FIGHT.
- YEAH.

YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT.

( groaning )

YEAH YEAH! GET HIM, KID! GET HIM, KID!

- FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!
- HIT HIM!

WHERE DID HE GO?

- ( buzzer sounds )
- Shorty: YEAH, BOY!

Ladies and gentlemen, never in my long

and brilliant career have I seen such an astonishing debut,

such a display of guts, poise and talent,

not only a rookie, but an Earthman.

Now could this be the contender

that the Humanoid races have awaited all these years?

- HOW DO I LOOK?
- YOU OUGHT TO SEE THE OTHER GUY.

YOU LOOKED GOOD OUT THERE TONIGHT, KID.

I FELT FANTASTIC, SHORTY.

IT WAS A LITTLE BIT AWKWARD AT FIRST,

BUT AFTER THE FIRST COUPLE OF BLOWS

THE ADRENALINE TAKES OVER. IT'S THE EXCITEMENT OF THE ARENA.

IT'S LIKE NOTHING I EVER FELT BEFORE.

WELL, NOW YOU WANNA GIVE IT ALL UP AND GO BACK TO EARTH, RIGHT?

SHORTY, I DID THAT TO GET YOU OUT OF THE JAM WITH THE TICKET MONEY.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT YOU HAD HIM--

- YOU, OUT.
- HE STAYS.

SO, ARMSTRONG...

YOU'RE FULL OF SURPRISES, AREN'T YOU?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, ROGOR?

YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE A FIGHTER.

I DIDN'T KNOW I HAD TO TELL YOU I WAS A FIGHTER.

IT'S A GOOD IDEA.

RIGHT, MR. ROGOR?

LEFT SHOULDER, SHORTY. IT'S A LITTLE STIFF.

YOU WERE VERY IMPRESSIVE OUT THERE TONIGHT.

YOU COULD GO RIGHT TO THE TOP

WITH THE RIGHT MANAGEMENT.

- I SIGNED WITH QUINN.
- ( chuckles )

I SAID WITH THE RIGHT MANAGEMENT.

ASK AROUND.

NOBODY GETS TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP CIRCUIT

WITHOUT ROGOR.

THEN I GUESS I WON'T BE CHAMPION.

( sighs )

ARMSTRONG...

WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT,

YOU'RE GOING TO WORK FOR ME.

NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT TO DO.

HOLD IT, WAIT A MINUTE.

WAIT A MINUTE. MAYBE YOU GUYS BETTER LEAVE

- BEFORE THE SHADOW POLICE COME, OKAY?
- ASK AROUND.

COME ON, ROOK. SIT DOWN, I'LL GIVE YOU A RUB.

COME ON, SIT DOWN.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT THOSE CHEAP HUSTLERS.

SO HOW COME YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM YOU WERE GOING BACK TO EARTH?

- MAYBE I'M NOT.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

I DON'T KNOW.

I FELT SOMETHING IN THERE TONIGHT, SHORTY.

- YEAH.
- I MEAN, I CAN ACTUALLY FIGHT IN THE ARENA.

- I CAN WIN.
- RIGHT.

JIM ROGOR MIGHT FIX THINGS AROUND HERE,

- BUT HE DOES NOT CONTROL ME.
- RIGHT.

THEY'VE BEEN SAYING FOR YEARS THAT NO HUMAN HAS GOT THE GUTS

TO FIGHT IN THE ARENA. I'M TELLING YOU, SHORTY, I CAN DO IT.

- RIGHT.
- I CAN GO ALL THE WAY.

RIGHT.

YOU WITH ME?

YEAH.

MMM.

SO THE THRAKIAN SAYS TO THE ALGAE HARVESTER,

"IF THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER,

WHERE'S THE COROLLIAN NASTULATOR?"

( crowd laughing )

THANK YOU.

AND THAT HORN, THAT HORN IS SO DUMB,

HE USED A NORVAX FOR A TUTOR!

( crowd laughing )

I LOVE THIS GUY. HE KILLS ME.

- I DIDN'T GET IT.
- YOU DON'T WANT TO.

I COULD STAY ALL NIGHT, FOLKS, BUT I GOTTA GO.

A HAND FOR THE BOYS IN THE BAND.

AND REMEMBER, I HATE YOUR GUTS!

( playing techno music )

I'M GONNA GO TALK TO THAT SPORTSWRITER OVER THERE.

A LITTLE PUBLICITY NEVER HURTS.

WATCH THE CHAMP FOR ME.

YOU GOT A LONG WAY TO GO BEFORE THAT.

HOW DO YOU MEAN THAT?

I JUST MEAN THAT I WANT YOU TO GO ALONG SLOWLY.

I MEAN, YOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR SHOT,

BUT I WANT YOU TO DO IT MY WAY. UNDERSTAND?

QUINN, HOW CAN SOMEONE WHO LOOKS

AS GOOD AS YOU DO BE SO TOUGH?

HOW DID YOU GET STARTED IN THE FIGHT GAME ANYWAY?

MY DAD USED TO RUN A STABLEFUL OF FIGHTERS.

OH, REALLY? WHEN?

A LONG TIME AGO.

HE HANDLED QUITE A FEW HUMAN CONTENDERS.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, MARCUS WAS HIS LAST CHAMP.

HE LOVED THE ARENA.

AND THEN ROGOR CAME ALONG AND TURNED THE SPORT INTO A BUSINESS.

( sighs ) A DIRTY ONE AT THAT.

IT BROKE MY DAD'S HEART.

MY DAD DIED AND LEFT ME SPINNER

AND A COUPLE OF SPARE PARTS, AND THAT'S ABOUT IT.

I'M JUST TRYING TO KEEP MY DAD'S DREAM ALIVE.

STEVE ARMSTRONG!

YOU'RE THE NEW HUMAN FIGHTER.

WE SAW YOU BEAT SLOTH IN THE ARENA.

YOU WERE GREAT. WASN'T HE, GAR?

WELL, WASN'T HE?

- COME ON, PEOPLE, COME ON.
- ( laughing )

CELEBRITY HOUNDS.

- ALL RIGHT!
- LOOK WHO'S HERE.

( laughs )

Horn: HEY, HOW ARE YOU?

YEAH YEAH, I'M THE CHAMP.

RIGHT, HEY, HOW ARE YOU DOING?

YOU SEE MY FIGHT?

NOT A BAD FIGHT.

THIS LAD SHOWS PROMISE.

PROMISE? HE KNOCKED HIM OUT OF THE RING.

Quinn: YOU KNOW, ROGOR,

IF I WERE YOU, I'D BE CAREFUL.

YOU MIGHT JUST BE LOOKING AT THE NEW CHAMP.

( laughs ) EXCUSE ME.

I WANT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO JADE.

JADE, THIS IS STEVE ARMSTRONG.

I BELIEVE I'VE MENTIONED HIS NAME.

WE'VE MET.

YEAH, MY LUCKY CHARM.

IT'S A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU ALL,

BUT IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I'M ABOUT TO GO ON.

LUCKY CHARM?

SO YOU'RE QUINN'S NEW BOY, THE HUMAN CONTENDER.

WELL, SLOTH WAS ALL WASHED UP.

DON'T THINK FOR A MINUTE YOU CAN GET INTO THE ARENA WITH ME.

I AM HORN. I AM CHAMPION!

SOON TO BE EX-CHAMPION.

IF YOU WANNA GO WITH SOMEBODY,

- YOU CAN GO WITH ME RIGHT NOW.
- HORN!

SAVE IT FOR THE FANS.

NO POINT IN GIVING AWAY WHAT THE PUBLIC WILL PAY FOR.

( soft music playing )

♪I LOVE ♪

♪THE BARBARIAN ♪

♪STARS' LIGHT BRIEFLY GLOW ♪

♪A MAN THAT SHE KNEW CAN'T ♪

♪FORGET YOU ♪

♪SHE FELT HE MUST GO ♪

♪MANY TIMES ♪

♪NIGHTS OF LOVE MAKE ♪

♪FORCES TO RISE ♪

♪MISTAKING THE DISGUISE ♪

♪SHE WAS CUTE ♪

♪HE HAD EYES ♪

♪BUT YOU'LL FIND... ♪

( sighs )

ROOK, WE GOTTA GO.

SHORTY, I WANNA SEE THIS.

I KNOW, BUT I TOLD HIM WE'D BE THERE

AND WE'D BE ON TIME. NOW LET'S GO.

EXCUSE US, MISS QUINN.

WE HAVE SOME BUSINESS TO ATTEND TO.

WE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. COME ON.

GOOD NIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU IN THE GYM TOMORROW MORNING.

- OKAY.
- EARLY.

HERE YOU ARE, EVERYBODY.

IT'S ALL FOR FREE!

- Armstrong: TAKE TWO.
- HERE YOU GO.

( chuckles ) HERE YOU ARE.

THERE IT IS. COME AND GET IT.

YOU WANT ME TO SIGN IT? OKAY.

YEAH YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT.

THERE YOU GO.

- YES.
- HEY, SHORTY?

- HEY, CHAMP?
- HOW AM I GONNA PAY FOR ALL THIS STUFF?

I GUESS YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO KEEP ON FIGHTING.

( laughs ) WHOO-HOO!

Marcus: ATTENTION, EVERYBODY!

ATTENTION.

ON BEHALF OF EVERYBODY HERE,

I'D LIKE TO GIVE YOU MY CHAMPION MEDAL

AS A TOKEN OF OUR APPRECIATION.

Shorty: GEE, THAT'S GREAT, MARCUS. WHAT AN HONOR.

( beeps )

FIRST OF ALL, THANK YOU.

BUT I CAN'T ACCEPT THIS.

I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE IT.

ONE FIGHT?

YOU FOUGHT 50 FIGHTS FOR THIS.

YOU WERE THE GREATEST.

YOU GAVE US HOPE AGAIN, BOY.

AND YOU GOT A LOT OF FIGHTS COMING UP,

SO KNOCK 'EM DEAD.

- ARMSTRONG!
- Crowd: ARMSTRONG!

( chanting ) ARMSTRONG, ARMSTRONG...

LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE HAVING FUN FOR NOW.

I APPRECIATE THE JOB WORKING FOR MR. ROGOR.

YOU'RE GOING TO BE MY INSURANCE POLICY.

Announcer: The crowd's so excited they're chanting.

They're angry. They want something--

a kick to the mouth, a right hook.

He's toe to toe with Valcan.

Oh, he's got him in a flying astrospin.

( alien announcer speaking )

( buzzer sounds )

Armstrong's done it again.

Hey, this kid's definitely for real.

( alien announcer speaking )

Announcer: Five fights, five victories.

A right cross. A bollo shot. What a combination.

He's down. He's flatter than a galactic pancake.

What a giant knockout for the kid.

After this win, Horn has got to give the human contender

a title match. What a contest that will be.

- YES, COMMISSIONER.
- I trust you agree?

They've got a lot of pressure on me.

- YES, I UNDERSTAND.
- That there's a lot of kruger at stake.

- ( laughs )
- Give the people what they want.

- You do understand?
- YES, COMMISSIONER.

So you'll set the date then?

IF YOU THINK HE'S READY, SIR.

Frankly, we don't have a choice.

And it'll be a good match.

YES, IT'S GOING TO BE A GREAT FIGHT.

All right then.

THE COMMISSIONER IS FORCING ME

TO GIVE ARMSTRONG A TITLE SHOT.

WELL, WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING, RIGHT?

I MEAN,

IF ARMSTRONG BEATS HORN,

YOU'LL LOSE CONTROL OF THE CHAMPIONSHIP FIGHTS.

HE WON'T BEAT HORN.

BUT WHAT IF HE DOES?

LOOK, MR. ROGOR,

I'VE GOT THIS PLAN I'VE BEEN WORKING ON WITH SKULL HERE.

AND YOU'RE GONNA LOVE IT.

YOU'RE REALLY GONNA LOVE IT.

YOU MIGHT EVEN GIVE ME CONTROL

OF THE EAST HUB BETTING SLATS WHEN YOU HEAR THIS.

WHAT PLAN?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

- SKULL.
- I FIGURED OUT A PHASE THREE ENTRY

INTO THE SEIKO 3000 WITH A 50,000 RAM OVERLOAD

VIA POINT ENTRY THE NUMBER 12 FREEZER CABLE--

THAT'S ENOUGH, SKULL. THAT'S ENOUGH.

LOOK, MR. ROGOR, WHAT SKULL IS SAYING IS--

IS THAT WE CAN FOOL WITH THE HANDICAPPER.

AND NO ONE'S EVER FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO THAT BEFORE.

( laughs )

( laughs )

YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE IT CAN'T BE DONE.

NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN ABLE

TO GET INTO THAT INFERNAL COMPUTER.

MR. ROGOR,

IF YOU LOSE CONTROL OF THE CHAMPIONSHIP FIGHTS,

YOU'LL LOSE CONTROL OF EVERYTHING.

I HAVE A PLAN OF MY OWN.

NOW YOU AND YOUR SKELETAL SIDEKICK LEAVE ME ALONE.

- MR. ROGOR.
- GET OUT!

YEAH, YEAH YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

( chattering )

GET IN THERE! WORK HIM INSIDE. COME ON, STEVE.

Wayne: WATCH THAT LEFT. WATCH HIS LEFT.

KEEP 'EM UP. KEEP 'EM UP, STITCHES.

OH, GET BACK. THERE YOU GO, KID.

COME ON, STITCHES, GIVE HIM SOMETHING.

OKAY.

( buzzer sounds )

Quinn: OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH. YOU GOT ENOUGH.

- GOOD JOB, STITCHES.
- Stitches: OH, THANKS.

ANOTHER ROUND? JUST ONE MORE.

WE DON'T WANNA DISAPPOINT THE CROWD, HUH?

OKAY, STITCHES, ONE MORE ROUND!

DO I HAVE TO KEEP IMITATING HORN?

- THE GUY'S AN ANIMAL. I TELL YOU, HE'S AN ANIMAL.
- HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.

ONE MORE WORD OUT OF YOU... SMACK HIM.

GET MOVING. COME ON, LIZARD LIPS.

- GO ON, BIG FELLA. YOU'RE DOING FINE.
- OKAY.

LOOK, I DON'T WANT YOU BURNING YOURSELF OUT IN THE GYM, OKAY?

NO WAY, THIS IS FOR THE TITLE, COME ON.

HMM?

- YEAH.
- Stitches: COME ON, STEVE.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO.

Quinn: ALL RIGHT, STEVE!

KEEP STICKING WITH THAT JAB.

Wayne: KEEP CIRCLING. KEEP CIRCLING.

Quinn: KEEP ON HIS BODY, STEVE.

Wayne: AND COMBINATIONS. COMBOS.

NOW MOVE. MOVE MOVE.

ROLL WITH IT. ROLL, ROLL, ROLL.

FOOTWORK, FOOTWORK. DON'T BREAK YOUR CONCENTRATION.

Quinn: IN AND OUT!

- FOOTWORK, FOOTWORK!
- WE DANCING OR FIGHTING?

THE FOOT, THE FOOT!

Wayne: COME ON, USE YOUR STRENGTH!

FOOTWORK! COME ON NOW!

( buzzer sounds )

HEY, THE WINNER. LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

GOOD MATCH, GOOD MATCH. YOU ALL RIGHT?

YOU ALL RIGHT? THANKS FOR THE WORKOUT.

- OKAY, KID.
- Shorty: YEAH! GOOD KICK, KID.

LOOKING GOOD OUT THERE, STEVE. YOU'RE READY.

I WANT YOU TO KEEP AN EYE ON THAT RIGHT, OKAY?

YOU'RE SLOWING DOWN THERE A LITTLE BIT.

I'M STARVED. LET'S GO EAT.

- THAT KID'S GOOD.
- GOOD FIGHT.

HELP ME GET OUT OF THIS GEAR, SHORTY.

LOOK, I WANT YOU TO WORK ON YOUR COMBINATIONS

AND KEEP THAT LATERAL MOVEMENT TIGHT, ALL RIGHT?

- ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?
- Steve: YES YES.

- OKAY, SURE.
- YOU HEAR ME?

NO PROBLEM. I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.

GO TAKE AN ION BATH, SO YOUR MUSCLES WON'T TIGHTEN UP.

I SAID I'D TAKE CARE OF IT.

Wayne: OKAY, GET BACK TO WORK NOW. COME ON, LET'S TRAIN.

WHAT'S HE IN SUCH A HURRY FOR?

LOOKS LIKE LOVE TO ME.

JADE.

HEY.

WHY DON'T WE GET TOGETHER LATER?

AND TAKE MY MIND OFF THINGS?

WE CAN, YOU KNOW, RELAX.

IF I'M NOT RELAXED, I CAN'T THROW MY BEST PUNCHES.

AH, AND I'M SUPPOSED TO HELP YOU RELAX?

WHY NOT?

MEET ME AT MY PLACE TONIGHT.

( birds chirping )

HELLO. COME IN.

YOUR PLACE IS INCREDIBLE.

THANK YOU. I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT.

I'M SORRY,

BUT I HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO FINISH GETTING READY.

I THINK YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

THAT'S VERY SWEET.

WOULD YOU LIKE A DRINK WHILE YOU WAIT?

SURE.

THE BAR IS OVER THERE. HELP YOURSELF.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THE FIGHT, STEVE?

IT'S LIKE YOU SAID:

BY THIS TIME TOMORROW NIGHT,

I SHOULD BE CHAMPION.

CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THIS?

SURE.

HERE, LET ME STAND UP.

IT'S EASIER THIS WAY.

IF YOU SAY SO.

WHAT ABOUT THE FIGHT?

LET ME WORRY ABOUT THE FIGHT.

WHAT IS THIS?

A TOAST TO THE NEXT CHAMPION.

YOU KNOW I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO DRINK.

STEVE, IT'S FOR LUCK.

WHAT HAPPENED?

( chuckles )

HORN WON'T HAVE TO WORK UP MUCH OF A SWEAT TONIGHT.

( moans )

YOU'RE NOT FALLING FOR HIM, ARE YOU?

ARMSTRONG?

NO.

JADE?

JADE!

( crowd cheering )

HORN HORN!

HORN! HORN! HORN! HORN!

HORN! HORN! HORN!

YEAH, COME ON!

I AM THE CHAMPION!

GET OUT OF HERE.

It's just incredible.

And Horn has broken with the tradition

that the champion enters the ring last.

HORN HORN!

HORN! HORN!

HORN! HORN!

( booing )

Horn: OH, SHUT UP!

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.

IF HE DOESN'T SHOW UP SOON,

THEY'RE GONNA CALL THE FIGHT.

- ROGOR'S GOT SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS.
- NO, HE DOESN'T.

- GET HIM ON THE TABLE.
- OKAY, ALL RIGHT.

WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?

IT DOESN'T MATTER. JUST HELP ME GET READY.

GIVE ME THE LIGHT. HIS PULSE IS SLOW.

THIS BOY IS NOT FEELING ANY PAIN.

I'M ALL RIGHT. I'M ALL RIGHT.

BE STILL. HE'S BEEN DRUGGED.

- I'LL GET A DOCTOR.
- OH, KID.

( sighs ) HE CAN'T FIGHT LIKE THIS.

- CAN I FIGHT LIKE THIS?
- AH, COME ON, KID.

THIS IS THE CHAMPIONSHIP, STEVE.

IT'S EVERYTHING THAT WE'VE WORKED FOR.

SO HELP ME GET READY.

NO, I'LL BE FINE.

EVERYBODY STAND AWAY, PLEASE.

LOOKS AS THOUGH ARMSTRONG IS GOING TO DISAPPOINT THE CROWD TONIGHT.

( chanting ) ARMSTRONG, ARMSTRONG...

WE WANT ARMSTRONG! WE WANT ARMSTRONG!

This crowd is growing restless.

Now where is the challenger?

HOW IS HE DOING?

WE'LL KNOW BETTER WHEN THE TEST RESULTS COME IN.

- WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
- BLOOD INFECTION, COMMISSIONER.

HORN'S BEEN OUT THERE FOR 10 MINUTES.

THAT CROWD IS READY TO TEAR THE ARENA APART.

( chanting ) WE WANT ARMSTRONG! WE WANT ARMSTRONG!

The first human fighter in half a century,

Steve Armstrong represents the hopes, the dreams,

the desires of every Earthling.

( chanting ) STEVE, STEVE, STEVE...

TRIMETAZINE 25. HE'S LOADED WITH IT.

50cc OF CRYSTALPLEX IMMEDIATELY.

Computer: Vital signs critical.

Approaching terminal.

HOW SERIOUS IS IT?

ANOTHER TWO HOURS, HE WOULD'VE BEEN DEAD.

SOMEONE TRIED TO POISON HIM.

- WILL HE BE ALL RIGHT?
- WE'VE GIVEN HIM A POWERFUL ANTI-INFECTOR.

HE SHOULD BE COMING OUT OF IT IN, OVER, 15 MINUTES.

Commissioner: WILL HE BE ABLE TO FIGHT?

HE WON'T BE 100%,

BUT YES, HE CAN FIGHT.

BUT I WON'T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.

WELL, IT'S UP TO YOU, QUINN.

DO YOU WANT TO WITHDRAW?

SO WHAT'S THE MATTER? ARE WE GONNA FIGHT OR WHAT?

( growls ) MOVE IT OUT.

I WONDER HOW LONG THEY'RE GOING TO WAIT.

( crowd chanting ) STEVE, STEVE, STEVE...

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

IS ARMSTRONG TOO YELLOW TO COME DOWN AND FIGHT TONIGHT?

HORN IS CHAMPION!

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

PLEASE!

PLEASE PLEASE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

ALL RIGHT, KID. EASY EASY.

LET'S GO, LET'S GO.

- ARE YOU OKAY?
- YEAH, I'M OKAY.

YOU GUYS MIND GIVING ME A MINUTE ALONE WITH STEVE?

Steve: WHAT FOR?

YOU TOO, SHORTY.

- THANK YOU.
- WHY?

- ALL RIGHT.
- WHAT'S GOING ON?

- JUST TELL ME ONE THING.
- WHAT?

WHO WERE YOU WITH LAST NIGHT?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

IT WAS THE GIRL WHO VISITED YOU AT THE GYM, WASN'T IT?

THAT'S MY BUSINESS.

YOU'RE MY FIGHTER. YOU'RE UNDER CONTRACT.

I SAID MY PRIVATE LIFE IS MY BUSINESS.

SHE'S ROGOR'S GIRL, STEVE.

WHERE IS HE?

- LOOK, STEVE--
- NEVER MIND, I'LL FIND HIM MYSELF.

- WHAT ABOUT THE FIGHT?
- THE FIGHT IS BETWEEN ME AND ROGOR.

HE'S NOT GONNA GET AWAY WITH THIS.

LOOK, IF YOU WANNA GET TO ROGOR,

THEN GO OUT THERE AND FIGHT HORN AND WIN.

( crowd cheering )

LISTEN TO THEM, STEVE.

THEY'RE CALLING FOR YOU.

THEY BELIEVE IN YOU.

I BELIEVE IN YOU.

JUST FORGET ABOUT ROGOR.

JUST DO IT FOR YOURSELF.

( chanting ) ARMSTRONG, ARMSTRONG...

GENTLEMEN, LADIES!

DUE TO CIRCUMSTANCES...

WELL, THAT'S IT. THEY'RE CANCELING THE FIGHT.

WHERE IS HE?

( chanting ) ARMSTRONG, ARMSTRONG...

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? YOU'RE LATE.

I AM TERRIBLY SORRY FOR THE DELAY.

TONIGHT'S CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH IS ABOUT TO BEGIN.

- I GAVE HIM THE POISON.
- OBVIOUSLY NOT ENOUGH.

Well, you heard the box fans.

And the human is moving down toward the ring even as we speak.

After a slight delay,

the challenger is finally stepping into the ring.

WEEZIL.

WEEZIL, GET UP HERE NOW.

YOU'RE SET.

HEY, ARE YOU OKAY?

IF YOU STAY IN MY CORNER TONIGHT.

YOU KNOW I WILL.

( buzzer sounds )

( buzzer sounds )

ALL RIGHT.

HUMAN TRASH.

ARMSTRONG,

YOU DIE NOW.

WHAT IS IT, MR. ROGOR?

THAT PLAN OF SKULL'S, WILL IT WORK?

YOU MEAN ABOUT THE HANDICAPPER?

NO PROBLEM, MR. ROGOR. NO PROBLEM.

- DO IT.
- RIGHT.

WEEZIL,

DO IT ALL THE WAY.

THEN WE WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT QUINN'S

PROTEGE ANYMORE.

Weezil: BRILLIANT, MR. ROGOR.

BRILLIANT.

STEVE, STEVE. HA HA!

HE'S STAYING WITH HIM, HUH?

SKULL, WE'RE HOOKED IN.

SKULL.

- AAH!
- Skull, where are you?

I'M HERE, WEEZIL.

JUST KEEP YOUR EYE ON THE RELAY BOX.

DON'T CHANGE ANYTHING FOR THE FIRST ROUND.

WE WANNA MAKE THIS LOOK LEGIT.

YEAH, ROOKIE!

( buzzer sounds )

- Score point to Armstrong.
- I BET THAT HURT.

OH! ALL RIGHT.

WHOO!

GET THIS FIGHT MOVING.

ARMSTRONG'S NOT SO BAD FOR AN EARTHLING, HUH, DAD?

LOOKING GOOD, KID.

YEAH, HE NEVER EVEN LAID A HORN ON YOU.

YOU REALLY DO FEEL SOMETHING FOR HIM, DON'T YOU?

NOTHING.

( sighs )

SECOND ROUND.

NOW WE HUMILIATE HIM.

- Five seconds.
- Quinn: YEAH, WELL, DON'T LET HIM FOOL YOU.

NOW THAT HE'S USED TO HIS HANDICAP RATING, HE'S GONNA COME ON

REAL STRONG, SO STAY ON HIM, OKAY?

- OKAY.
- JUST KEEP THAT KILLER INSTINCT.

- ( buzzer sounds )
- Fighters to center ring.

( growling )

COME ON. COME ON.

- GO AHEAD.
- WHAT'S GOING ON?

NOW WE'RE GOING TO HAVE SOME FUN.

BLAST OFF!

( whirring )

COME ON, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

COME ON, COME ON!

GIVE ME YOUR BEST SHOT.

COME ON, FIGHT! COME ON, FIGHT!

STAY AWAY FROM HIM! DOESN'T LOOK GOOD.

COME ON, STEVE! TAKE HIM APART!

COME ON, I DARE YOU.

COME ON!

- HEY, STOP IT!
- COME ON.

HORN HORN!

HEY, GET UP, KID, GET UP. COME ON, ROOKIE, GET UP.

Horn: YEAH, COME ON.

COME ON!

HORN!

Quinn: HE'S PLAYING WITH HIM.

I SMELL A RAT,

OR A WEEZIL.

COME ON.

( buzzer sounds )

HORN IS CHAMPION!

Score point to Horn.

Match even at one fall.

YEAH!

HORN!

I'M CHAMPION.

TAKE A SEAT, KID.

THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG. I DON'T HAVE ANY STRENGTH OUT THERE.

HE'S WORKING YOU HARD.

EVEN WITH THE HANDICAPPER, YOU KNEW THIS WAS GONNA BE A TOUGH FIGHT.

NO, IT'S MORE THAN THAT. I DON'T HAVE ANY STRENGTH OUT THERE.

THAT'S IT. YOU'RE STILL SICK. I'M CALLING THIS MATCH.

NO, LOOK, I'M GONNA FINISH THIS FIGHT.

IT'S OKAY, BOSS. HE CAN DO IT.

OKAY.

GIVE ME SOME WATER.

OW!

I'LL GIVE 'EM A NIGHT THEY WON'T FORGET.

Five seconds to round start.

ROUND THREE, SKULL. NOW WE KILL HIM.

- ( buzzer sounds )
- Fighters to center ring.

- IT'S YOUR ROUND, CHAMP.
- ALL RIGHT, GO!

( booing )

( crowd chanting ) STEVE, STEVE, STEVE...

SMASH HIM TO BITS!

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SPACE RAT?

YOU NUBIAN--

THAT A BOY, HORN! GO GET HIM!

HE'S GONNA KILL HIM.

YOU'VE GOTTA STOP IT.

COME ON, GET UP.

AFTER COMING THIS FAR?

GET UP! COME ON, STEVE! GET UP!

Knockdown count start.

One...

two...

- three...
- ( screaming )

four...

five...

FULL AT THE SKULL. FULL AT THE SKULL.

( screaming )

six...

seven...

- LOOK AT THE HANDICAPPER.
- eight...

NUBIAN!

nine...

HE'S GETTING UP.

Countdown discontinued.

Match resumes.

NEBULITE!

( screaming )

( screaming )

( buzzer sounds )

( chanting ) ARMSTRONG, ARMSTRONG...

Knockout count start.

One... two...

three... four...

five...

THE HANDICAPPER IS OUT! CAN'T THEY SEE THAT?

seven... eight...

nine...

10.

Knockout. Match to Armstrong.

The new undefeated Champion of the Universe--

Steve Armstrong.

JADE.

GOOD FIGHT.

HEY, THEY TRIED TO FIX THE HANDICAPPER.

Rogor: JADE! JADE!

DON'T GO.

YOU KNOW, ROGOR, THERE'S AN OLD SAYING:

"WHEN IT'S OVER, IT'S OVER."

AND GUESS WHAT? IT'S OVER.

STEVE!

STEVE.

Announcer: And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen,

the first human title holder in over 50 years.

Now what is in store for this young man?

No one can say. But one thing is certain:

As long as there are Steve Armstrongs

out there in the universe,

there will always be contenders.