American Backwoods: Slew Hampshire (2013) - full transcript

♪

(MAN) MAJOR GENERAL JOHN STARK.

REVOLUTIONARY WAR HERO,
NEW HAMPSHIRE NATIVE,

AND THE MAN WHO
COINED THE STATE MOTTO

"LIVE FREE OR DIE.

DEATH IS NOT
THE WORST OF EVILS."

WHERE IS MY RAINBOW TROUT?!

WISE MEN TALK BECAUSE
THEY HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.

FOOLS, BECAUSE THEY HAVE
TO SAY SOMETHING NOW--

PLATO, RIGHT?

HOW'S YOUR HONCHO?



♪

(SPEAKING PORTUGUESE)
I DON'T SPEAK MEXICAN.

IT'S PORTUGUESE, YOU IDIOT.

IN REGIONAL NEWS TONIGHT,
AUTHORITIES IN MAINE ARE

RELEASING MORE GORY
AND EXPLICIT DETAILS

SURROUNDING THIS WEEK'S
GRISLY DISCOVERY

AT A REMOTE LOCATION
NEAR ALLAGASH LAKE.

ON TUESDAY, LAW ENFORCEMENT

IN NEARBY MILLINOCKET

WAS CALLED TO THE SCENE
AFTER A PARK RANGER

STUMBLED UPON HUMAN REMAINS.

ACCORDING TO
THE MAINE STATE POLICE,

THE RESIDENTS OF
THIS TINY COMMUNITY

WERE MEMBERS OF AN
ENVIRONMENTAL RESEARCH GROUP



AND HAD BEEN LIVING THERE
FOR NEARLY TWO MONTHS.

(GROWLING)

(SCREAMING)

WHILE PARTIAL REMAINS
OF TWO MALE VICTIMS

HAVE NOW BEEN IDENTIFIED,

25-YEAR-OLD HOLLY ANN MICHAUD,

A GRADUATE ASSISTANT
STUDYING ENDANGERED PLANT LIFE

IS STILL CONSIDERED
TO BE MISSING.

(SCREAMING)

HER DISAPPEARANCE
FOLLOWS A STRING OF

MISSING PERSON REPORTS ALONG
THE MAINE-CANADIAN BORDER

DATING BACK TO MARCH

WHEN FIVE MEMBERS
OF AN ICELANDIC

WILDERNESS SURVIVAL GROUP

VANISHED IN THE MOUNTAINS
OF NEW BRUNSWICK.

EERILY, THIS WEEK'S TRAGEDY

ALSO BEARS STRIKING SIMILARITIES

TO A HORRIFIC DISCOVERY
MADE JUST SIX WEEKS AGO

AND ONLY 100 MILES NORTHEAST

OF ALLAGASH LAKE.

IN THE WAKE OF
THESE RECENT FINDINGS,

INVESTIGATORS ARE NOW FACED WITH

THE FRIGHTENING POSSIBILITY THAT

THESE ATTACKS MAY BE CONNECTED.

AND EVEN WORSE?

THAT THERE MAY BE
A PATTERN DEVELOPING.

♪ I'M COMING,
I'M COMING TO GET YOU ♪

♪

♪ I'M COMING FOR YOU ♪

♪ I'M ON THE PROWL

♪ HOT ON YOUR TRAIL,
YOU'LL HEAR ♪

♪ MY ANIMALISTIC GROWL

♪ 'CAUSE NO ONE'S EVER FOUND ♪

♪ MY SAFE HAVEN YET

♪ I'LL SOONER FORCE UPON YOU ♪

♪ PAIN AND REGRET

♪ SO BEST TO STOP
BEFORE YOU THINK ♪

♪ YOU'LL RUN AWAY AGAIN

♪ THIS TIME, I'M COMING AT YOU ♪

♪ WITH A DRIVE THAT
WILL NEVER END ♪

♪ SO PACK UP
ALL YOUR THINGS AND TRY

♪ TO MOVE AWAY AGAIN

♪ I KNOW WHERE
YOU'RE GOING-- HUH! ♪

♪ I KNOW WHERE YOU'VE BEEN ♪

♪ I'M COMING,
I'M COMING TO GET YOU ♪

♪ I'M COMING,
I'M COMING FOR YOU ♪

♪ START RUNNING
'CAUSE I'M COMING ♪

♪ I'M COMING,
IT'S ALL OVER FOR YOU ♪

♪ (METAL SONG)

OH, SHIT!
OH, YOU FUCKING SEE THAT?

BUDDY, A FUCKING REAL DEAD BITCH

RIGHT IN HER FUCKIN' GARDEN.
OH SHIT, YO.

BACK TO THE ORCHARD,
MOTHERFUCKERS?

NO, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

WHAT?

WHO THE FUCK DIED
AND MADE YOU KING SHIT, HUH?

OH.

GUESS I RUINED THE LAST WEEKEND
TOGETHER, ALREADY, FUCK.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? THIS AIN'T
GONNA BE OUR LAST WEEKEND TOGETHER.

OH, BULLSHIT,
IT'S THE FIRST TIME

I SEEN YOUR ASS SINCE
YOU WENT AWAY TO COLLEGE.

ABOUT TO FILE A
MISSING PERSONS REPORT.

I STARTED SCHOOL A MONTH AGO.

YOU'RE GUILT-TRIPPING ME
OVER ONE MONTH?

AND I'M GONNA BE GOING TO
COLLEGE NEXT SEMESTER MYSELF.

HE'S GOING OVER TO THE VO-TECH

TWO BLOCKS FROM
HIS MOTHER'S HOUSE.

I DON'T SEE YOU GOING AWAY.

I'M STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL,
YOU FUCKING PRICK.

YOU'VE HAD A FUCKING
HARD-ON FOR ME EVER SINCE

I GOT A PROMOTION AT
THE MUFFLER SHOP.

YOU DON'T EVEN WORK THERE.

AND I GOT BETTER USES
FOR MY HARD-ONS.

YOU GOT NO CLUE

WHAT TO DO WITH A HARD-ON.

FUCK YOU.

OH, DID I TOUCH YOU
IN A BAD PLACE, HUH?

IS THAT WHAT I DID, HUH?
HOW ABOUT RIGHT HERE?

HOW 'BOUT FUCKING RIGHT HERE,
HUH, HOW ABOUT HERE?

COME ON! ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH!

HOW ABOUT RIGHT
FUCKING HERE, HUH?

KNOCK IT OFF-- DON'T DO IT,

(ALL SHOUTING)

ALL RIGHT, BOTH OF YOU--

(ALL SHOUTING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

UH, KID?

MAYBE APPARENTLY YOU NEVER
READ THE OWNER'S MANUAL.

BUT THE ALBINO RHINO
NEVER BREAKS.

GET THE FUCK OUT, WALK HOME.

(LAUGHING)

ALL RIGHT,
KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF.

KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF!

ALL RIGHT, DOG, JUST FUCKING HIT
ME, I DESERVE IT.

NO, NO ONE'S HITTING YOU.

♪ SHE CAME CREEPING OUT

♪ FROM HER TOMB...

OH, YOU LITTLE FUCKER!

(LAUGHING)

ARE WE DONE YET?

HEY! OH.

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING IN HERE?

WAIT, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

YOU USED TO PLAY
ON A BASEBALL TEAM

WITH MY BROTHER,
CHARLIE GOSSARD?

CHARLIE GOSSARD? YEAH.

HEY, THERE'S A WICKED HUGE PARTY

AT THE PIT TONIGHT.

YOU GUYS SHOULD COME.

WOULD YOU QUIT BEING
SUCH A HO-BAG?

NO, BABY, DON'T QUIT.

WHOA, WHAT THE F--

WOW, HE'S A VIRGIN,
YOU'RE A FAGGOT.

I PLAYED BALL WITH
CHARLIE GOSSARD

THREE YEARS AGO.

HIS SISTER WAS OUR BAT GIRL.

SHE WAS, LIKE, NINE.

YOU'RE NOT MAJORING IN MATH
AT THE VO-TECH, ARE YOU?

NO, GUN REPAIR.

IT'S A CERTIFICATE COURSE.

WELL, SINCE YOU THINK
YOU'RE THE ONLY MAN

THAT KNOWS HOW TO
PROPERLY USE HIS GUN,

YOU'LL GET YOUR CHANCE
TO PROVE IT TOMORROW NIGHT.

THOUGHT WE'D GIVE YOU
A PROPER INITIATION.

INI... INITIATION?

YOU SURE? I MEAN--
WHAT INITIATION?

I AIN'T GONNA SIT AROUND
AND CRY ALL WEEKEND.

YOU CAN IF YOU WANT,
OR YOU CAN COME WITH ME.

NO, NO, HOLD--
NO, CAN I COME TOO?

YEAH, I GUESS SO.
UNLESS YOU WANNA GO

AND JOUST WITH THAT
JUNIOR HIGH HYMEN.

NO, NO, FUCK THAT, DOG,
I'M GOING WITH YOU.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE,
BUT YOU CAN'T FUCKING STOP ME.

YOU GOTTA ADMIRE HIS CONVICTION.

YEAH, WHICH ONE? (CHUCKLING)

ALL RIGHT-- FUCKING DRIVING ME.

YOU'RE FUCKING DRIVING!

♪

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(DUCK QUACKING)

(SQUEAKING)

(TRAIN WHISTLING BLOWING)

(CHURCH BELLS TOLLING)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

OPEN UP!

CAMPUS POLICE!

(BANGING ON DOOR)

LONG TIME NO SEE.

OH, YES, BRO! OH, SHIT!

AAH!

AH, YO, SO THIS IS
IVY LEAGUE, HUH?

GOT BOOKS AND SHIT,

LOOK AT THIS.

WHAT BRINGS YOU GENTLEMEN
TO DARTMOUTH?

WE'RE HERE TO RESCUE YOU
FROM THIS WAYWARD LIFE

YOU'VE CHOSEN FOR YOURSELF, DOG.

UH, THANKS,
BUT THIS WAYWARD LIFE

COST ME A LOT OF MONEY
SO I THINK I'LL KEEP IT.

BULLSHIT, YOU GOT ALL THEM
NEGRO FUND SCHOLARSHIPS

AND SHIT, RIGHT?

WELL, I GUESS THEY
GOTTA MEET THEIR QUOTA.

OH, YEAH, LIKE McDONALD'S
WITH THOSE RETARDS.

OR THE MUFFLER SHOPS.

YOU SEE THIS, BUDDY,
THIS FUCKIN' HARD-ON.

OH, DAMN, DID YOU SEE THAT?

HEY! WHERE YOU GOING, BABY?

YOU GOTTA RUB IT IN?

(VOICES)HELP! OH, MY GOD.

WHAT DO WE DO?
CAN WE GET SOME HELP?

I'M SORRY, BRO.

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP US!

WELL, NOW YOU JUST
LOOK LIKE THE COVER OF

A PUBLIC ENEMY ALBUM,
BUT IF THAT'S WHAT

YOU'RE GOING FOR...

SO WHERE IS IT
THAT YOU'RE GOING?

SALEM STATE. YEAH?

YOU'RE GONNA PLAY
BALL THERE, RIGHT?

THAT'S GREAT, MAN.

YEAH, NOT REALLY,
IT'S DIVISION THREE.

YOU KNOW, YOUR KNEES ARE
THE ONLY REASON--

THAT I DIDN'T GET DRAFTED,
THAT'S WHAT EVERYBODY SAYS.

THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR
BEING AN ADRENALINE JUNKIE.

NO, MAN.

WHAT I GOT WAS LUCKY.

(WOMAN SHRIEKING)
GET FUCKED, YOU CUNT.

♪ I'M GONNA GET YOU
IN THE SACK ♪

♪ SO I CAN BUST
THIS NUT ON YOU ♪

♪ 'CAUSE, GIRL,
I WANNA STROKE YOU ♪

♪ OH MAN, I WOULD LIKE
TO GROPE YOU ♪

♪ JUST COME INTO
MY ROOM RIGHT NOW ♪

♪ I'LL SHOW YOU HOW TO TEASE,
BITE, AND POKE YOU ♪

♪ WELL I DON'T MEAN
TO OFFEND YOU ♪

♪ 'CAUSE YOU KNOW
I WANT TO BE IN YOU ♪

♪ BUT TIME IS A-RUNNING
SHORT RIGHT NOW ♪

♪ SO BABY,
LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS ♪

♪

(HORN TOOTING)

DUDE, YOU THINK
HE'S GOT OREGON TRAIL

ON THIS MOTHERFUCKER?

FREAK.

(HORN TOOTING)

(CLOWN) HELLO, HELLO.

I'M JIMMY-GO-ROUND,
THE RAPPIN' BIRTHDAY CLOWN.

YOUR PARENTS SENT ME TO TOWN

TO TURN THAT FROWN UPSIDE-DOWN.

A'IGHT, LET'S START OVER.

I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU GUYS
IN, WHAT, IN MONTHS?

SINCE GRADUATION?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

WE'RE HEADING OVER
TO BURLINGTON.

THERE'S A BIG PARTY
OVER AT WATKINS' PLACE.

YEAH, AND THEN OVER THE BORDER
TO CELEBRATE HIS 18th--

WE FIGURED, UH,
SINCE WE DIDN'T GET A CHANCE

TO CELEBRATE YOUR 18th,
MAYBE YOU'D COME WITH?

YEAH, FUCKING-A RIGHT,
YOU SHOULD COME WITH, DOG.

WHAT, AM I FUCKING-A WRONG HERE?

I'M JUST GETTING
SETTLED IN HERE, Y'ALL.

YOU KNOW THAT I CAN'T--
NO, NO, FUCKING BULLSHIT.

HIS FUCKING DAD JUST DIED,
FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.

IT'S THE LEAST YOU COULD DO.

WELL, WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT.

THAT'S WHAT I'M FUCKING
TALKING ABOUT.

YEAH, DOG, YOU DOWN WITH THAT?

YOU DOWN WITH IVY LEAGUE,
DOG, HUH?

LET'S GO, LET'S DO THIS.

LET'S GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

HEY, YO, HOLD UP,
HOLD UP, HOLD UP.

THERE'S ONE THING I HAVE
TO DO BEFORE WE LEAVE.

♪ I'M GONNA TELL YOU
HOW THIS IS GONNA ♪

♪ ALL GO DOWN,
TAKING THE TRAIN TO HELL ♪

♪

♪ AIN'T GONNA RIDE IT SLOW ♪

HEY, GIMME ONE OF THEM
FUCKIN' BEERS, KID.

I'M GONNA GET
BOMB-COCKED TONIGHT.

YEAH.

♪ DON'T LET IT GET IN THE WAY ♪

♪ YOU'LL SEE JUST HOW LOW
I CAN GO ♪

♪ YOU'LL FIND A WAY
TO LET IT GO, YOU KNOW ♪

♪ LIKE, THE HATERS DISAPPEAR ♪

♪ (MUSIC FADES)

YEAH, I TOLD YOU
WE'D FUCKING FIND HIM.

I TOLD YOU I HAD A MEETING.

WHERE'S BUDDY?

WENT TO A PAY PHONE
TO LET WATKINS KNOW

WE'RE ON OUR WAY.
YOU WANT A SIP?

PUT THE BEER AWAY.
WHAT THE FUCK, MAN,

YOU USED TO BE
DOWN FOR ANYTHING.

WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT GUY, HUH?

SHIT, I'M SORRY, DOG, I MEANT--

NO, I MEANT LIKE
ALL THEM OTHER TIMES

YOU WERE DOWN FOR ANYTHING,
YOU KNOW, LIKE, UH, LIKE

ALL THE OTHER TIMES
BEFORE THAT TIME.

WHAT?

BIG DRUG RAID AT UVM LAST NIGHT,
WATKINS GOT PINCHED.

YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
PARTY'S CANCELLED.

(WITH FRENCH ACCENT) BONJOUR
MES AMIS, BONJOUR.

YEAH, WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT IS.

IS THIS A FRIEND OF YOURS, BRO?

UH, YEAH, THIS IS,
UH... PROFESSOR SCROD,

WE, UH-HE WAS RECRUITING
SOME OF THESE, UM...

OUI, OUI.

RECRUITING SOME OF
THE ETHNIC STUDENTS.

OUI, OUI, ON THE FIELD
TRIPTO THE WHITE MOUNTAINS.

YOU SEE, I'VE FOUND
THAT THE NEW STUDENTS

HAVE ONLY SEEN THE UGLINESS
OF HUMAN NATURE.

THEY COME TO FIND
THE HOPE AND HUMANITY

JUST BY BEING CLOSE
TO MOTHER NATURE.

IT'S TRE BEAU, NO?

HE SAID IT'S BEAUTIFUL,
HE SAID IT'S VERY BEAUTIFUL.

MAGNIFIQUE, PARLEZ
VOUS FRANCAIS?

FOUR YEARS OF
HIGH SCHOOL FRENCH.

OH, THIS ONE'S TROUBLE,
LOOK OUT FOR THIS ONE.

HE'S TROUBLE.

THIS IS A FUCKING JOKE, RIGHT?

MAYBE YOU COME ON
THE FIELD TRIP?

WILL YOU COME ON THE FIELD--

NO, IF YOU LIKE.

NO, WE'RE GOOD,
WE GOT OTHER PLANS.

OKAY... PARDON, PARDON.

EXCUSEZ-MOI.

WAIT, HOLD ON, SCROTUM.
YOU MADE A MISTAKE, DOG.

BLACK PEOPLE DON'T LIKE NATURE.

HUH.

HEY, LOOK, SCROTUM,
I'M JUST TRYING TO

FUCKING HELP YOU OUT,
DOG, YOU KNOW,

YOU'RE WASTING
YOUR TIME, THAT'S ALL.

(CHUCKLING)

WELL, IT SEEMS YOU KNOW
A LOT ABOUT NATURE, NO?

MAYBE I SHOULD TAKE YOU
WITH ME TO THE WOODS?

WHAT THE FUCK-- HELL, NO, DOG.

NO? NO, FUCK THAT, I'M GOING UP

TO CANADA TO HUNT ME SOME
OF THAT BEARDED ACTION,

IF YOU FUCKIN'
KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN',

DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT
I'M FUCKING SAY, HUH?

ZUT ALORS,

ZUT ALORS, YES.

I'VE GOT A PETIT
SECRET TOO, HUH?

I'M GOING TO BE DOING
THE SAME THING

ON MY CAMPING TRIP.

YOU SEE, I FIND THAT
ALL IT TAKES IS A TENT,

NO PARENTS, AND AN ACCENT.

(LAUGHING)

MMM.

(SIGHING)

I DON'T KNOW,
IF IT'S CANADA YOU CRAVE,

MAYBE I CAN TELL YOU
A THING OR TWO ABOUT

MONTREAL, NO?

♪ FIRST, YOU TAKE A STEP LEFT,
AND YOU TAKE A STEP RIGHT ♪

♪ THEN REACH OUT AND GRAB
ALL GENITALIA IN SIGHT ♪

OR, UH, MAYBE SOMETHING BETTER,

SOMETHING CLOSER?
MAYBE SHERBROOKE?

♪ YOU GOTTA LOOK TO THE SIDE
AND GRIND THOSE HIPS ♪

♪ YOU GOTTA REACH OUT
IN FRONT OF YOU ♪

♪ AND GRAB THOSE TITS

BUT, UH, MAYBE THERE'S,

UH... NO,

IT'S THE OBVIOUS CHOICE.

MAYBE, NO,

YOU'VE PROBABLY
BEEN SO MANY TIMES.

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,
WAIT A MINUTE.

WHAT OBVIOUS CHOICE?

WELL, THE NIGHT SHADE,
OF COURSE.

♪ EVERYBODY DO
THE SEX OFFENDER ♪

♪ DO THE SEX OFFENDER WITH ME ♪

♪ DON'T STOP DOING
THE SEX OFFENDER ♪

♪ UNTIL YOU SEE YOUR OWN FACE ♪

♪ ON THE REGISTRY

NO, YOU'VE NEVER BEEN?

NO, INCROYABLE.

HAVE I GOT THE SURPRISE
FOR YOU, BOYS, OH, MY...

♪

YOU 21?

OH, YEAH, DEFINITELY.

YEAH, HE IS.

I SHOULD KNOW.

AND WHY SHOULD YOU KNOW?

UM... UH, I DON'T KNOW,

I JUST, I JUST SHOULD.

AND HE DOES.

(DOG BARKING)

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

(RUNNING FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

FOUND A FROG!

GO, FROG, HOP.

THERE YOU GO.

YEAH, THERE YOU GO, HOP.

(EXHALING)

GOT A TOILET?

IT'S CLOGGED.

SORRY, BOYS.

AIN'T NO LAW AROUND HERE.

NO GOOD PLUMBING EITHER.

SO NIGHT CRAWLERS OR RUBBERS?

WELL, YOU LOOKING TO FISH,
OR YOU LOOKING TO FUCK?

AS A MATTER OF FACT,
WE-- WE WERE TOLD BY,

UM... PROFESSOR SCROD.

YEAH, SCORUM, THAT FUCKING DINK.

HE TOLD US THAT
THERE WAS A PRIVATE

STRIP CLUB AROUND HERE,
LIKE, JUST OVER THE BORDER?

(MAN LAUGHING) THE LADY SLIPPER.

I HAD ME A WILD NIGHT UP THERE,

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.

(LAUGHING)

NOW LISTEN.

YOU MIGHT WANNA WRITE THIS DOWN.

FOLLOW EVERY SIGN YOU SEE
FROM MOUNT DURBAN.

THAT'LL DUMP YOU OUT
RIGHT AT THE BORDER.

YOU CAN'T MISS IT FROM THERE.

DUH... DURBAN.

DUH... DURBAN.

MOUNT DURBAN.

URBAN? DURBAN.

FOLLOW THEM SIGNS.

YOU'LL BE UP TO
YOUR HAIRY EASTER EGGS

IN CHEAP SUDS AND TWAT
IN NO TIME AT ALL.

CHEAP SUDS AND TWAT.

DID YOU SAY LADY SLIPPER?

I'M UP THERE ALL THE TIME. YEAH?

WE HEARD IT WAS
CALLED SOMETHING ELSE.

NIGHT SHADE.

YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, NIGHT SHADE.

WELL, UH...

UH...

MAYBE THAT'S CANADIAN
FOR LADY SLIPPER.

LOOK, WHATEVER
THEY'RE CALLING IT NOW.

FOLLOW THEM SIGNS,
PUT YOU RIGHT IN

THE BELLY OF THE BEAST.

YEAH, UH...

I DON'T THINK I LIKE
THE SOUND OF THAT.

DON'T WORRY, I AIN'T TALKING
ABOUT NO "ETO LEECHEE."

ETO LEECHEE? ETO LEECHEE.

(MAN) E... TO... LEECHEE.

ETO LEECHEE.

E...

TO...

LEECHEE...

OLD LEGEND AROUND HERE.

MEANS "TREE KILLER"
IN INDIAN LANGUAGE.

(BOY) YEAH, CREEK
INDIAN, I BELIEVE.

YOU BOYS GONNA MESS
WITH THAT THING,

YOU'RE GONNA BE UP SHIT CREEK.

BEEN A LOT OF MUTILATED
WILDLIFE AROUND HERE

THIS SUMMER.

FROM HERE

ALL THE WAY TO MAINE.

SHIT, DOG, I DON'T KNOW,
MAYBE AFTER WE'RE DONE HUNTING

FOR BEAVER, WE COULD HUNT

THAT FUCKING THING
DOWN OURSELVES,

WHAT DO YOU SAY, BOYS?

(MAN CHUCKLING)

YOU CAN'T HUNT SOMETHING
THAT DON'T EXIST.

(LAUGHING)

MATCHES.

(SLURPING)

(LOUD KISSING)

(LAUGHING)

(SHOP BELL JINGLING)

ON THE HOUSE.

HEY, SORRY ABOUT THE, UH--

THE TOILET?

IT'S COOL.

MOUNT DURBAN.

FOLLOW THEM SIGNS.

(SHOP BELL JINGLING)

COME ON, LET'S JUST
GET OUT OF HERE.

♪ WHERE IS THE JAGER ♪

♪ WHERE ARE MY LADIES

♪ WHERE ARE THE INGREDIENTS ♪

♪ TO MAKE THIS PLACE
GO FUCKING CRAZY ♪

♪ MOLOTOV COCKTAILS

♪ THROW THEM UP INTO THE SKY ♪

♪ LET THE FIRE RAIN DOWN

♪ AND HOP ON FOR THE RIDE ♪

♪ 'CAUSE THERE'S A PARTY
IN HELL TONIGHT ♪

♪ A PARTY IN HELL

♪ THERE'S A PARTY IN HELL ♪

♪ AND YOU'RE ALL INVITED ♪

♪ THERE'S A PARTY IN HELL ♪

♪ AND YOU'RE INVITED

♪ THE BUFFET'SNEVER COLD ♪

♪ AND...

(LAUGHING)

♪ NO NEED TO RSVP

♪ YOU JUST B-Y-O-B

♪ PARTY DOWN... ♪

I DON'T KNOW HOW ANYONE
COULD EVER LIVE OUT HERE.

THERE'S THESE TRIBES WHO
LIVE IN THE RAINFOREST.

THEY DON'T EVOLVE
LIKE THE REST OF THE WORLD.

'CAUSE THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW THAT
THE REST OF THE WORLD EXISTS.

IT'S KIND OF LIKE
SOMEBODY ELSE WE ALL KNOW

WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS
BUT WHO IS SITTING

DIRECTLY BEHIND ME.

YEAH, SAME COULD BE SAID
ABOUT MANY AFRICAN TRIBES.

TALKING ABOUT AFRICA DON'T
MAKE YOU MORE BLACK.

(CRUSHING CAN)

I WAS JUST DRAWING A PARALLEL.

OH, NOW YOU'RE DRAWING TOO?

YOU'RE AN ARTIST?
IS THAT YOUR MAJOR?

(OPENING CAN)

NO, IT'S LINGUISTICS.

WHAT'S YOURS?

IT'S GUN REPAIR.

IT'S A CERTIFICATE COURSE.

(LAUGHING) HEY!

SOME PEOPLE LIKE
TO SHOOT HEROIN.

PERSONALLY, I PREFER COCAINE.

BUT I DO LIKE TO SHOOT GUNS.

AND SOMEBODY YOU'LL HAVE
YOUR VERY OWN CERTIFICATE

THAT SAYS YOU'RE QUALIFIED
TO REPAIR THEM, TOO.

COME ON, GUYS, KNOCK IT OFF.

HEY, HEY. (TIRES SCREECHING)

WHAT THE FUCK, MAN?
HIT THE BRAKES!

HIT THE BRAKES!

AHH-- FUCK.

ARE WE THERE YET?

YOU ALL RIGHT?

YO, YO, YO, YOU SEE THAT?

WHAT'S THAT?

OH... SHIT.

SHIT. ACT COOL, ACT COOL.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

LICENSE AND REGISTRATION.

TAKE THIS.

HEY, GOOD PECS.

YOU TAKE CREATINE?

YEAH, MY PARTNER TAKES CREATINE.

WELL, LOOKS LIKE
MANHOOD HAS JUST

WELCOMED A NEW MEMBER.

CONGRATULATIONS.

THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE YOU
COULD BE HEADING ON THIS ROAD.

FIRST TIME?

YES, SIR.

YOU BOYS HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT
YOU'RE ABOUT TO EXPERIENCE?

YES, SIR.

NO...

I DON'T THINK YOU DO.

WELL, I'M JEALOUS.

WISH I WAS INTRODUCED
TO IT AT YOUR AGE.

(RUSTLING)

(GROWLING)

IT IS MY DUTY TO ENSURE
BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT

THAT THIS VEHICLE IS
EQUIPPED FOR SAFE TRAVEL

ON THE ROADS AND HIGHWAYS OF
THE STATE OF NEW HAMPSHIRE

PURSUANT TO TRAFFIC CODE
SIERRA OSCAR XRAY 1-9-1-8

CURTULA VERSUS
THE TOWN OF LITCHFIELD.

ANY VEHICLE THAT HAS BEEN
ENGAGED IN AN ACCIDENT

WHICH HAS THEREBY
COMPROMISED THE STRUCTURAL

OR MECHANICAL INTEGRITY
OF SAID VEHICLE

MUST PASS A BASIC
ROADSIDE INSPECTION

BEFORE I CAN LAWFULLY
PERMIT ITS ADVANCEMENT.

HEY, YOU WANT ME
TO CHECK IT OUT?

I WORK IN A MUFFLER SHOP.
I RECENTLY GOT PROMOTED.

NOW THERE'S SOMETHING
YOU CERTAINLY DON'T READ

IN THE OBITS EVERY DAY.

GONNA NEED YOU TO POP THE HOOD.

(HOOD RATTLING OPEN)

(GROWLING)

FUCK.

THE ALBINO RHINO
NEVER BREAKS, DOG.

AIN'T NO LAW HERE, MY ASS.

WHICH ONE IS IT?

YOU TAKE IT IN THE ASS...

OR THE MOUTH? WHAT?

OH, COME ON, THAT FRAME
DIDN'T JUST BUILD ITSELF.

I MEAN, YOU'RE JUICING, RIGHT?

SO IS IT THE INJECTABLE
OR THE ORAL?

MY PARTNER PREFERS THE ORAL.

IT'S NEITHER, SIR.

WHAT THE FUCK?

IT'S A VOLVO, RIGHT?

YES, SIR.

GOOD, STRONG VEHICLE.

YES, SIR.

YEAH.

BUT NOT TONIGHT.

IT'S PISSING FLUIDS LIKE
MY PARTNER PISSES BLOOD.

WE'LL CALL YOU A TOW.

FUCK!

THE ALBINO RHINO BREAKS!

YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU SHUT
THE FUCK UP, ALL RIGHT?

WHATEVER, DOG.
DON'T GET PISSED AT ME

JUST 'CAUSE YOU TAKE IT
IN THE ASS.

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!

OW, MOTHERFUCKER.

MOTHERFUCKER, YOU HIT
MY FUCKING FACE.

WHO THE HELL IS THIS?

ALL THAT REHAB ON MY KNEE,

AND I BREAK MY PITCHING HAND
ON HIS FUCKING FACE.

GUESS I HAD IT COMING.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

YOU AND YOU. (WHISTLING)

ARE YOU THE TOW?

I'M ONE OF THEM.

I'M THE LITTLE PIGGY
WHO CRIED WEE, WEE, WEE

ALL THE WAY HOME.

GET IT?

TOW, TOE, LITTLE PIGGY?

WHERE'S THE TOW TRUCK?

OH, IT'S, UH...
IT'S BACK IN TOWN.

I WAS ON THE ROAD,
PICKED UP THE CALL ON THE CB.

FIGURED I'D SNATCH YOU UP NOW.

TAKE A SECOND TRIP BACK
FOR THE CAR.

NO ADDITIONAL CHARGE.

LET'S GO, BOYS.

COMING?

WHAT THE FUCK ARE
WE DOING OUT HERE?

WE WERE GONNA GO
SEE SOME TITTIES,

TILL YOU HAD TO PUNCH ME
IN THE FACE.

OH, SORRY.

BABY SEAT'S IN THE BACK
SO YOU BOYS ARE GONNA

HAVE TO SCOOCH UP FRONT WITH ME.

ALL RIGHT, LOVE BIRDS.

AT LEAST WE GOT A POLICE ESCORT.

CHARIOT AWAITS.

HEY, YOU WANNA HOP IN FRONT?

THIS IS YOUR CAR, SIR?

YEAH, YOU WANNA HOP IN?

WHAT THE FUCK KIND
OF CRUISER IS THIS?

♪ (HEAVY METAL ON RADIO)

YOU BOYS LIKE SNUFF?

(BANGING ON TIN)

SNUFF, DIPPIN' TOBACCO.

NO.

SUIT YOURSELVES.

WHAT IS THIS?

IT'S A POLICE VEHICLE,
WE'RE GONNA TAKE YOU BACK--

IT'S NOT A POLICE VEHICLE.
NO, NO,

THIS IS AN UNDERCOVER
POLICE VEHICLE.

WHERE ARE MY FRIENDS?
YOUR FRIENDS JUST LEFT.

YO, BUDDY, LET ME
THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

I'M GONNA TAKE YOU BACK
AND GET A TOW.

SO YOU CAN MEET UP WITH
YOUR FRIENDS, ALL RIGHT?

THIS ISN'T A POLICE VEHICLE,
IT'S A GOD DAMN STATION WAGON.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
YOU WANNA STAY OUT HERE?

♪ (RADIO)

OH.

YOU BOYS LIKE SEXY MUSIC?

THAT'S NONE OF YOUR
BUSINESS, OKAY?

THIS AIN'T A REAL FUCKING CRUISER, BUDDY!
DUDE-GUY, YOU GOOD?

HEY, I NEED YOU TO CALM
DOWN, ALL RIGHT?

I NEED YOU TO LET GO
OF ME RIGHT NOW.

DUDE-GUY, YOU ALL RIGHT?
HEY, CALM DOWN.

YO, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU--

BACK OFF, ALL RIGHT?
NO, YOU BACK OFF.

AAH!
YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS CALLED?

GET THE FUCK OFF-- HEY, BUDDY!

♪ YOU GIRLS JUST DON'T

♪ KNOW HOW EASY YOU HAVE IT ♪

♪ JUST PUT YOUR PUSSIES
IN THE AIR ♪

♪ AND THERE'S ALWAYS
SOMEONE THERE

♪ TO STAB IT WITH THEIR COCK ♪

YUP.

YOU GONNA MESS WITH ME?
DUDE-GUY!

LET ME THE FUCK
OUT OF HERE, DOG!

AHH! JUST CALM DOWN.

AHH! HEY, DOG, HEY!

THIS IS WHAT IT'S GONNA
BE FROM NOW ON.

♪ AND IF I COULD
KEEP AN OPEN MIND ♪

♪ AND TAKE A COCK

♪ IN MY BEHIND, WELL...

HEY, YO, BUDDY.

(SCREAMING)

BUDDY, BUDDY! WHAT THE FUCK?!

♪ TALKED TO A FRIEND
WHO WAS FLAMING GAY ♪

♪ AND HE GETS LAID

♪ ALMOST EVERY DAY

BUDDY, OH!

YO, GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!

OH, NO!

GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

WHAT THE FUCK?!

♪ IF YOU WERE MINE

♪ IF I COULDN'T GET A GIRL ♪

♪ THEN I COULD
PROBABLY GET A GUY ♪

(PANTING)

(SCREAMING)

GET ME THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!

(SCREAMING)

♪ WHY ♪

ME AND MY BROTHER'S BAND.

WE CALL OURSELVES "COVER BOY."

GET IT?

WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE?

WELL...

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU.

BUT I'M GONNA HUFF SOME GAS

AND EAT A SHITLOAD
OF CHEESE DOODLES.

NO, SERIOUSLY.

I AM GONNA EAT
THESE CHEESE DOODLES.

RAPE AND PILLAGE
THROUGH THE VILLAGE.

RAID AND PLUNDER THROUGH
THE RAIN AND THUNDER.

(LAUGHING)

(LAUGHING CONTINUES)

HE'S DRUNK.

AND I'M G.G.

I'M WHAT YOU MIGHT CALL
THE FOUNDER OF THE FEAST.

GOT THAT FROM
THE MOVIE "TOMBSTONE."

I LIKE THAT POWERS BOOTHE.

YOU LIKE POWERS BOOTHE?

HUH?

I'M NOT REALLY THE FOUNDER,

BUT THE HONCHO'S
LETTING ME, UH...

OFFICIATE THE GAME THIS YEAR.

(LAUGHING)

(MAN GRUNTING)

(LAUGHING CONTINUES)

DON'T WORRY, DON'T WORRY.

HE'LL BE PENALIZED FOR THAT.

PENALIZED.

ONE GUNSHOT FROM A SHOTGUN.

SENSELESS.

SO HOW DO YOU MAKE
THIS MAKE SENSE, HUH?

TAKE YOUR TIME.

TIME YOUR TAKE.

SOME CALL IT MEAN.

I CALL IT MEANINGFUL.

YOU TAKE MY MEANING?

A NON-LETHAL WOUND?

THAT MEANS YOU GET TO GET YOURS.

SET 'EM LOOSE.
MAYBE GET IT AGAIN.

I'M SURE YOU CAN IMAGINE.

THAT SHIT RIGHT THERE
GETS OUR DICKS HARD.

AIN'T THAT RIGHT, HOOGELOON?

OUR DICK, CHECK.

BUT SEE...

IF YOU SLAY YOUR PREY...

YOU SLAY MY PLAY.

(LAUGHING) THEN YOU GOTTA PAY.

SO YOU DO THE DEARLY DEPARTED.

AND THEN YOUR HUNTING PARTNER,

HE DOES YOU. (LAUGHING)

I LOVE IT WHEN YOU JERK ME OFF
WITH YOUR ASSHOLE, BOSS.

WRAP IT UP WITH
A LITTLE TARGET PRACTICE.

MAKE WAGERS.

(CAR APPROACHING)

I MADE MYSELF
TWO GRAND LAST YEAR.

THAT'S HOW I GOT
THE NEW NICKNAME.

(CAR DOOR CLOSING)

THEY USED TO CALL ME

BERSERKER.

(LAUGHING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

MAIM FOR PLEASURE,
KILL FOR GOOD MEASURE.

THERE'S NO ESCAPING
YOUR MURDER AND RAPING.

(LAUGHING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

HI.

A TENT, NO PARENTS,
AND AN ACCENT?

HUH?

(NORMAL ACCENT) WELL...

MAYBE NOT A TENT BUT, UH,

A CAMPER WILL DO JUST FINE.

THE KEY'S IN THE IGNITION.

A LITTLE SURPRISE IN THE TRUNK.

AN ART FESTIVAL'S ALWAYS
GOOD FOR A PLUCK AND FUCK.

OH, DON'T I KNOW.

JUST RELAX, RELAX,
RELAX, BIG DOG.

YOU SEE THE GOOD OFFICER
ON YOUR WAY IN?

NO, BUT I TOOK THE BACK ROADS
LAST COUPLE OF MILES, SIR!

THEY'RE ALL FUCKING BACK ROADS.

GET THE FUCK OFF ME.

SAVE HIM.

WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU GET OFF?

ANYWHERE I WANT
IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL.

JUST REMEMBER, FOLLOW THE RULES,

AND YOU'LL RIDE THE MULES.

(CHUCKLING)

(MUFFLED GROANING)

(CHUCKLING)

HEY, THERE, CUPCAKE.

YOU WANT IN?

WHEN THE HUNT BEGINS,
THEN I'M IN.

HOW CIVILIZED.

AHH, YEAH, I KNOW.

SO THE, UH...

NIGGER?

CHERRY ON TOP.

CHERRY ON TOP.

WHO DO WE HAVE HERE?

HOW YOU DOING, OLD TIMER?

NARWHAL, SHOW 'EM
TO THE GUEST BEDROOM,

WILL YOU?

SONS OF BITCHES AMBUSHED ME.

SAID THEY'RE LOOKING
FOR YOUR FRIENDS.

SAID THEY WERE FAMILY.

WAIT.

DO YOU KNOW THIS GUY?

THEN HE'S NOT TO BE TRUSTED.

I DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE,
MAN, I'M JUST A POET.

I'M JUST A POET, THAT'S ALL.

JUST A POET.

APPARENTLY,
HE'S JUST A FUCKING POET.

AND YOU ARE?

MY FRIENDS CALL ME BAGS.

WELL, HELLO, BAGS.

THAT'S A GOOD ONE.

I WAS AT A BAR IN BERLIN.

THESE GUYS GRABBED ME UP.

I THOUGHT MAYBE MY COUSIN
PUT 'EM UP TO IT.

HE'S ALWAYS PULLING
SHIT LIKE THIS.

YOU THINK YOUR COUSIN'S
INVOLVED IN THIS?

THIS IS JUST A-- A PRANK?

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I WOULDN'T COUNT ON IT.

NEITHER WOULD I.

(SHOUTING)

HEY, POET, WHO'S THAT FAMOUS ONE
OF YOU FROM NEW HAMPSHIRE?

YOU'RE THINKING OF FROST.

YOU KNOW ANYTHING BY THAT GUY?

HUH?

HOW ABOUT YOU?

HUH?

A VOICE SAID...

YOU GONNA LET HIM
SHOW YOU UP LIKE THAT?

(VOICE) "LOVE AT
THE LIPS WAS TOUCH

"AS SWEET AS I COULD BEAR.

"AND ONCE THAT SEEMED TOO MUCH;

"I LIVED ON AIR

"THAT CROSSED ME
FROM SWEET THINGS.

"THE FLOW OF-- WAS IT MUSK

"FROM HIDDEN GRAPEVINE SPRINGS

"DOWNHILL AT DUSK?

"I HAD THE SWIRL AND ACHE FROM

"SPRAYS OF HONEYSUCKLE

"THAT WHEN THEY'RE GATHERED

"SHAKE DEW ON THE KNUCKLE.

"I CRAVED STRONG SWEETS,

"BUT THOSE SEEMED STRONG
WHEN I WAS YOUNG.

"THE PETAL OF THE ROSE

"IT WAS THAT STUNG.

"NOW NO JOY BUT LACKS SALT,

"THAT IS NOT DASHED

"WITH PAIN AND WEARINESS
AND FAULT.

"I CRAVE THE STAIN OF TEARS,

"THE AFTERMARK OF ALMOST
TOO MUCH LOVE,

"THE SWEET OF BITTER BARK

"AND BURNING CLOVE.

"WHEN STIFF AND SORE AND SCARRED

"I TAKE AWAY MY HAND

"FROM LEANING ON IT HARD

IN GRASS AND SAND."

(LOUD GROANING)

"THE HURT IS NOT ENOUGH.

"I LONG FOR WEIGHT AND STRENGTH

"TO FEEL THE EARTH AS ROUGH

TO ALL MY LENGTH."

(TEETH CRUNCH) AHH!

AAH!

WHAT THE FUCK.

AHH, AHH!

GET DOWN ON YOUR FUCKING KNEES!

GET DOWN ON YOUR
FUCKING KNEES RIGHT NOW!

YOU STAY ON YOUR FUCKING KNEES.

DON'T YOU FUCKING MOVE!

THE LAST ONE DIDN'T LOCK IT.

(SCROD) YOU BIT OFF MY DICK!

WHERE'S MY DICK?

GIVE ME MY DICK BACK.

ESCAPE!

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

LET THE GAMES BEGIN.

AGE BEFORE BEAUTY.

SHEEP BEFORE WOLVES.

(FOOTSTEPS, GROWLING)

(PANICKED PANTING)

(GROWLING)

FUCK.

NO, NO, NO.

IT'S NOT MY DEAL, MAN,
THIS IS NOT MY DEAL.

I'M JUST A PUPPET.

I'M JUST A PUPPET,
THEY MADE ME DO IT.

THEY MADE ME DO IT.

NO, NO, OH!

(SCREAMING)

(SCREECHING)

(HYPERVENTILATING)

(MUFFLED CRY)

(MUFFLED SCREAM)

GAME'S STARTING A LITTLE
EARLY, AIN'T IT?

WHOA-WHOA-WHOA, HOLD ON THERE.

WE WANT SOME POETRY.

"WE DANCE ROUND
THE RING AND SUPPOSE.

"THE SECRET...

SITS IN THE MIDDLE AND KNOWS."

AHH!

THANK YOU, THANK YOU,

I'LL BE HERE ALL WEEKEND.

(CHUCKLING)

(MANGLED NORDIC LANGUAGE)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE THROUGHOUT)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?

(SHRIEKING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE THROUGHOUT)

G.G., YOU FUCKING COCKBAG.

YOU STARTED THE GAME WITHOUT US.

ARE WE IN THE GAME?

(GROWLING)

(ROARING)

(ROARING)

(SCREAMING)

(FIRE CRACKLING)

(CHOPPING)

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?

BIG FUCKER IN
A HALLOWEEN COSTUME.

HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW?

PART OF THE GAME, RIGHT?

WELL, THEN WHAT ARE
YOU WAITING FOR?

MAN, THAT GULF WAR
SYNDROME REALLY DID

ROT YOUR FUCKING BRAIN.

THAT WAS A LETHAL STRIKE.

YOU MERCY KILLED HIM.
NOW YOU CAN MERCY FUCK HIM.

(FIRE CRACKLING)

FOUR MONTHS.

FOUR MONTHS.

FIVE NIGHTS.

FIVE NIGHTS.

HEY, WHAT DO YOU SEE?

DARWINISM.

EXCUSE ME?

DESPERATE TIMES CALL
FOR DESPERATE MEASURES.

(FIRE CRACKLING)

LOOK AT THAT. (CHUCKLING)

I'LL BET HE'S DEAD, TOO.

WHAT A SHAME.

HE WAS AN AWESOME DAD,
HELL OF A MUSICIAN, TOO.

HUNT'S OVER, GAME'S OVER.

HOO-FUCKING-RAH!

YOU'RE A DISGRACE
TO THE UNIFORM!

ONLY THING YOU EVER
SERVED IS TIME.

SHIT YOU DID TO
THOSE SAND NIGGERS

WAS A THOUSAND TIME WORSE
THAN WHAT I WAS IN FOR--

THAT WAS WAR.
THAT WAS A FREE PASS.

THIS IS WAR.

YOUR MEN NEED YOU.

GAME'S NOT OVER, GAME'S CHANGED.

THEN I'M GOING TO GET MY GUN.

(DOOR OPENING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

(ENGINE STARTING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(ALL CHEERING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

WHAT ARE THEY DOING?

THEY'RE MEASURING THEIR MANHOOD.

I ALWAYS JUST USED A RULER.

(OWL HOOTING)

I WISH THAT OWL WOULD
SHUT THE FUCK UP.

(HOOTING CONTINUES)

YOU KNOW WHAT THOREAU
SAID ABOUT THE OWLS?

THAT HE WISHED THEY WOULD
SHUT THE FUCK UP?

"I REJOICE THAT THERE ARE OWLS.

"LET THEM DO THE IDIOTIC

AND MANIACAL HOOTING FOR MEN."

(MEN SHOUTING)

YEAH, WELL, I'M REAL GLAD

YOU'RE HAVING A HOOT
OF YOUR OWN OVER THERE

WITH YOUR AUTHORS
AND ANIMALS AND SHIT,

BUT WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, BRO,

I DON'T CARE HOW SMART YOU ARE

OR HOW MUCH YOU KNOW,
UNLESS WHAT YOU KNOW

IS HOW TO GET ME THE FUCK OFF

THIS GODDAMN MAPLE TREE

WITHOUT GETTING SHANKED
BY THOSE SICK FUCKS.

NO OFFENSE.

NONE TAKEN.

(OWL HOOTING)

BUT THAT'S NOT MAPLE.

I'M PRETTY SURE IT'S PINE.

(FIRE CRACKLING)

(MANGLED SHOUTING)

(ENGINE STALLING)

(FRUSTRATED SOBBING)

DON'T WORRY, THEY DON'T
UNDERSTAND ENGLISH.

JUST STAY AWAY FROM-- OLD NORSE.

EDUCATED GUESS.

I'M MAJORING IN LINGUISTICS,
IT'S NOTHING SPECIAL.

WELL, THEY SEEM TO THINK
YOU'RE PRETTY SPECIAL.

WELL, SHE SEEMS TO THINK
I'M SUPPOSED TO...

LEAD THEM INTO BATTLE.

LINGUISTICS?

FOUR YEARS OF
HIGH SCHOOL FRENCH.

SHE'S BEEN WITH THEM
A LOT LONGER THAN ME.

SHE'S BECOME ONE OF THEM
NOW, WHO ARE...

WHATEVER THEY ARE.

(GROWLING)

(SOBBING)

(GROWLING)

IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE
NEW ENGLAND, I THINK.

WE'VE BEEN MOVING FOR MONTHS.

WHERE ARE WE?

NEW HAMPSHIRE.

I THOUGHT SO.

THE RESOURCES ARE
PLENTIFUL HERE.

THAT'S WHY THEY STOPPED.

(GROWLING)

OH, FUCK!

(GROWLING)

I'M SORRY, KID, SORRY!

(GROWLING)

(WOMAN SPEAKING FRENCH)

(MEN SHOUTING)

(WOMAN SPEAKING FRENCH)

HEY, WHAT THE FUCK'S GOING ON?

ARE YOU AS GOOD WITH NUMBERS
AS YOU ARE WITH LANGUAGES?

HEY, UNTIE US.

MY NUMBER IS
5-3-5-9-8-9-4-5-4-6.

WHEN YOU GET HOME, CALL ME.

WHAT? EITHER I'LL BE
THERE WHEN YOU CALL,

OR YOU CAN EXPLAIN
TO MY FAMILY WHY I'M NOT.

PLEASE, I'M TIRED
OF FUCKING ROPES!

(MEN SHOUTING)

OH, OH.

LISTEN, THERE'S A LOT OF
EDIBLE VEGETATION OUT HERE.

YOU STAY AWAY FROM THE
BLACKBERRIES OFF THE RIVER.

THEY'RE POISONOUS--
BLACKBERRIES ARE POISONOUS?

NO, THEY'RE JUST BLACK IN COLOR.

THEY'RE CALLED NIGHT SHADE.

THEY'RE VERY SWEET,
BUT A HANDFUL COULD KILL YOU.

HERE.

YOU'LL NEED IT MORE THAN I WILL.

(SHOUTING)

(SCREAMING)

(PANICKED SOBBING)

(COUGHING/SOBBING)

(PANICKED CRYING)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING, SOBBING)

(ROARING)

(SCREAMING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(SWORDS CLANKING)

(SCREAMING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(SCREAMING)

(CRYING)

HAS IT OCCURRED TO YOU
THAT I MIGHT LIKE TO KNOW

WHAT THE FUCK'S GOING ON
BEHIND MY BACK?

I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS RELEVANT.

WHAT ELSE ARE
YOU KEEPING FROM ME?

YOU FIRST.

GET SOME SLEEP.

IF YOU'RE LUCKY,
YOU WON'T DIE IN IT.

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY?

YOU KNOW, I JUST THOUGHT
OF A WAY FOR YOU TO GET

OFF THAT MAPLE.

I'LL START SCREAMING
AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS

AND GESTURING TOWARDS YOU

LIKE YOU'RE THE ONE RESPONSIBLE.

SHIT, I MIGHT GET KILLED, BUT
YOU'LL BE DEFINITELY BE DEAD.

AT WHICH POINT, I'LL ASSUME
THAT THEY'LL CUT YOU DOWN.

THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT, RIGHT?
SHUT THE FUCK UP.

HEY, YOU SPEAK THE FUCK UP.

I'M THE ONLY REASON
THAT YOU'RE STILL ALIVE.

AND THEY'RE LOOKING FOR ANY
REASON TO CHANGE THEIR MIND

SO YOU NEED TO START TALKING,
AND YOU BETTER START TALKING--

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.

REMEMBER WHEN YOU ASKED
IF MY COUSIN WAS INVOLVED?

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

(WOMAN) DAVID?

YEAH, WHAT IS IT?

ARE YOU DOING WHAT I THINK
YOU'RE DOING IN THERE?

I'M SORRY, YOU KNOW THAT
I LOVE YOU WITH THE BEARD.

I GUESS... I'LL JUST NEVER

UNDERSTAND THAT WHOLE...
CHARLES MANSON THING

YOU INSIST ON DOING.

HONEY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

I'M FINE.

IT'S JUST NOT LIKE YOU
TO UP AND LEAVE THE ANNUAL

FISHING TRIP WITH YOUR COUSIN.

I'M NOT COMPLAINING.

I JUST NEVER THOUGHT
I'D SEE THE DAY.

I DID.

WELL, FINISH...

WHATEVER IT IS
THAT YOU'RE DOING.

AND COME TO BED, OKAY?

PUT US IN THERE WITH YOU.

IT'S PART OF THEIR GAME.

THEY SAID IF YOU BROKE LOOSE,
IT WAS UP TO US.

I NEVER-- I NEVER
COULD HAVE DONE IT.

I'VE NEVER DONE
ANYTHING LIKE THIS.

YOU GOT A GIRLFRIEND?

I HAD A WIFE.

IT WAS...

IT WAS A YEAR AGO THIS WEEK.

IT'S BEEN A LONG WEEK.

A LONG YEAR.

BUT THAT'S NO EXCUSE.

I'M SORRY.

TWO WINTERS AGO.

I, UH... (CLEARING THROAT)

GOT BUCKED OFF A SNOWMOBILE.

LANDED ON A DOWNED POWER LINE.

USED TO DO CRAZY SHIT
TO IMPRESS MY FRIENDS,

YOU KNOW?

ONE OF 'EM, HE...

NEVER STOPPED BLAMING HIMSELF.

BUT I WAS THE ONE
WHO THOUGHT HE WAS

INVINCIBLE, IMMORTAL.

I ACCEPTED HIS APOLOGY.

EVEN BEFORE HE MADE IT.

BECAUSE THE ROLES COULD
HAVE JUST AS EASILY

BEEN REVERSED.

IT'S JUST A HAND, RIGHT?

YEAH.

GOT NO TOES EITHER.

7200 VOLTS WILL DO THAT TO YOU.

JESUS.

YOU DIDN'T LOSE YOUR, UH...

OH, HELL, NO. PHEW.

(CHUCKLING)

DID YOU HAVE TO RELEARN

HOW TO...

YOU KNOW, WITH YOUR OTHER HAND?

YOU KNOW?

HUH?

I HAD TO RELEARN
EVERYTHING SO...

(CHUCKLING)

LISTEN.

THERE'S A...

LITTLE CABIN,

QUARTER MILE NORTH
OF THE HUNTING CAMP

JUST OVER THE RIDGE.

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW...

THEIR RULES, SO...

I BROUGHT A GUN.

THEY MADE ME
STASH IT OVER THERE.

IF I COULD JUST GET OFF THIS...

PINE TREE.

I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T.

DESPERATE TIMES.

DESPERATE MEASURES.

5-3-5.

9-8-9-4-5-4-6.

5-3-5.

9-8-9-4-5-4-6.

♪ (ROCK 'N ROLL)

HEY, HEY.

YOU CAN'T PASS OUT HERE, KID.

IF I SEE YOU SLEEPING,
I'M GONNA THROW YOU OUT.

WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?

NOTHING, I--

JUST... I THOUGHT
YOU WERE SOMEONE ELSE.

LET ME GUESS, THE LEAD SINGER

FOR COVER BOY, RIGHT?

YEAH, I GET THAT A LOT.

♪ THAT LOOK IN YOUR EYES,
IT MAKES ME WONDER ♪

♪ WHO YOU'RE DREAMING OF... ♪

THERE'S A GOOD REASON FOR IT.

I'M HIS BROTHER.

♪ BLACK MOON, BLACK MOON ♪

♪ IS GOING ON...

♪ TO YOU

♪

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU
DOING OUT HERE, KID?

I-- I-- I DON'T KNOW, I--

WE WERE WITH THESE HUNTERS
AT THIS STRIP JOINT.

BAGGING THAT WHITE TAIL.

WHAT? MY KIND OF BEDFELLOW.

NO.

NO, NO, NO.

NO-NO, NO, NO, NO.

NO, NO, NO, NO...

NO!

(BIRD CAWING)

(RUSTLING)

NOT THIS SHIT AGAIN.

FUCK.

FUCK.

FUCK.

♪ (SOFT ROCK)

♪ TECTONIC SHIFTS
ON THE LANDSCAPE OF ME ♪

♪ I USED TO BE GREEN

♪ AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE ♪

♪ NOW I'M EXPOSED

♪ RAW AND OPEN WIDE... ♪

OH, OH...

(GRUNTING)

HEY.

HEY, HEY!

COME HERE.

COME HERE.

(GRUNTING)

LOOK.

(GROANING)

DO IT, DO IT!

WHAT THE FUCK, COME ON!

(GROANING)

WHAT THE FUCK
ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!

FUCK!

(SHOUTING)

WATCH THE BIRDY, MOTHERFUCKER.

(GRUNTING)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

HEY, BRO?

YOU DIDN'T MAKE IT EASY
FOR ME BACK THERE, DID YOU?

COME ON, IT'S COOL.

'CAUSE NOW
WE'RE GONNA SWITCH ROLES.

SHIT.

CAME BACK TO FIND MY GUN, HUH?

THAT'S GOOD,
THAT'S PART OF THE PLAN.

THAT'S WHAT I WANTED, RIGHT?

YEAH, BUT THERE IS NO GUN.

I KNOW, I KNOW WHAT I SAID.

I KNOW WHAT I SAID.

YEAH, I SAID A LOT OF THINGS.

OR MAYBE I DIDN'T SAY ENOUGH.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, BRO?

BRO?

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?

WHERE THE FUCK IS EVERYBODY?

(BOTTLE CLINKING)

(PANTING)

PLEASE, JUST GO.

PLEASE, JUST GO!

(ROARING)

GO.

(BUDDY) I SAW THIS SHACK.

I JUST CAME IN HERE
TO REST AND...

MY KNEE, MAN.

YOU CALLED ME BRO. WHERE'S BRO?

ARE YOU ONE OF HIS FRIENDS?
YEAH.

LOOK, I WAS JUST WITH BRO, OKAY?

THOSE CRAZY FUCKS HAD US
STRAPPED TO TREES ALL NIGHT.

IS HE OKAY? WE GOT SEPARATED.

WE GOTTA FIND HIM,
WE GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE.

WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

GODDAMN IT!

(BAGS) YOU HUNGRY?

I'M STARVING.

I HAVEN'T EATEN
ALL NIGHT EITHER.

I STOPPED AND PICKED
SOME BERRIES.

YOU GOT BERRIES?

LOOK, YOU TAKE THESE, OKAY?

YOU TAKE THESE BERRIES.

ARE THESE BLUEBERRIES?

GO AHEAD, EAT 'EM.
EAT THOSE BLUEBERRIES.

(CHAINS CLANKING)

(FOOTSTEPS THUDDING)

(BAGS) ARE YOU DONE YET?

YEAH, MAN.

SHEEP BEFORE WOLVES.

WHAT? DOESN'T MATTER TO ME.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

I ACTUALLY PREFER IT
POST MORTEM.

WHAT-- WHAT IS THIS?

I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET BRO HERE.

AND I WAS GONNA HAVE HIM SHOW ME

JUST HOW MUCH HE'D RELEARNED.

BUT HE CAN JUST WATCH.

A MILLION LIVES AT STAKE.

A MILLION LIVES IT'S GONNA TAKE.

A MILLION CORPSES IN ITS WAKE.

ALBINO RHINO.

(SHOUTING)

WHAT THE FUCK, MAN!

WHAT THE FUCK?

(BUDDY) WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?

GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

ALL RIGHT, MAN.
JUST RELAX, JUST RELAX.

WAIT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT.
IT'S NOT BIG ENOUGH FOR YOU?

JUST GET-- GET US SOME HELP.
WANNA TOUCH?

GET US SOME FUCKING HELP.
JUST WATCH, THAT'S COOL.

DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME, BACK UP.

YOU'RE WITH THAT
FUCKING COP, AREN'T YOU?

SHUT THE FUCK UP
AND ENJOY THE SHOW.

SHIT, IT WAS LIKE THE
FUCKING ETO LEECHEE, MAN.

IT FUCKING KILLED
MY FRIEND, MAN!

IT WAS GONNA FUCKING
KILL US TOO, RIGHT?

OH, SHIT.

LOOK AT YOUR HAND,
MAN, YOU'RE BLEEDING.

GOD, YOU'RE GONNA FUCKING DIE,
TOO, AREN'T YOU?

(BAGS) EAT YOUR BERRIES.

(BUDDY) I'M EATING MY BERRIES.

EAT YOUR FUCKING BERRIES.

WANT SOME CREAM
FOR THOSE BERRIES?

I DON'T WANT ANY FUCKING CREAM.

WHY DON'T YOU WANT A LITTLE
CREAM FOR YOUR BERRIES?

I'LL GIVE YOU
SOME CREAM, WATCH IT.

WATCH IT. THIS IS FUCKED UP.

HUH? I'LL BEAT THE LIVING SHIT--

I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE,
TOUGH GUY.

YEAH, MY KNEE'S FUCKED UP.
PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON.

WHAT'S THAT, YOUR KNEE?

AHH! WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER ONE?

(DUDE-GUY) I'VE BEEN OUT
HERE ALL FUCKING NIGHT, MAN.

I'M FUCKING DYING OF
STARVATION AND SHIT.

I FOUND THESE BERRIES
BY THE RIVER.

AND I TASTED ONE AND THAT
SHIT'S JUST TOO SWEET, MAN.

AND... THIS SWEET SHIT'S
BAD FOR YOU, DOG.

YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW
A LOT ABOUT NATURE.

YEAH, IT'S LIKE
MY MOTHER TOLD ME.

IT'S LIKE THE ANTIFREEZE
IN THE GARAGE, MAN.

THE SHIT TASTES
LIKE HAWAIIAN PUNCH

BUT IT'LL FUCKING KILL YOU.

I SWEAR TO CHRIST,
IT'LL FUCKING--

(ARROW MAKING CONTACT, GASPING)

FUCKING SICK MOTHERFUCKER.
SAY YOU LOVE IT JUICY.

YOU LOVE IT JUICY.
SAY, "I LOVE IT JUICY."

YOU LOVE IT JUICY, MOTHERFUCKER.

SAY IT.
FUCK YOU, MAN, BACK THE FUCK UP!

SAY "I LOVE IT JUICY."
BACK AWAY!

"I LOVE IT JUICY,
I LOVE IT JUICY,

I LOVE IT JUICY--"
YOU LOVE IT FUCKING JUICY!

TELL ME YOU FUCKING
LOVE IT JUICY, YEAH.

YOU! COME ON, TELL ME.

TELL ME YOU LOVE IT
FUCKING JUICY.

YOU SICK FUCK!

(DUDE-GUY GASPING, SOBBING)

(BODY THUDDING)

OH, WELL.

GAME'S CHANGED ANYWAY, HUH?

KNOW IT'S, UH,
BEEN A WHILE SINCE...

YOU KNOW?

WHAT DO YOU SAY?

WEE, WEE, WEE.

(CRASHING TO GROUND)

WHAT, YOU'RE NOT HUNGRY ANYMORE?

THAT'S ALL RIGHT,
IT DOESN'T MATTER.

YOU ATE PLENTY ALREADY.

(SPITTING)

(COUGHING)

THAT'S RIGHT.

(COUGHING)

RIGOR MORTIS.

I MEAN, RIGOR PENIS.

(CHUCKLING)

(CAR DOOR OPENING, CLOSING)

(CHUCKLING) HONCHO.

(GUNSHOT)

(LAUGHING)

(ARROW MAKING CONTACT)

(GROWLING)

(GRUNTING)

(VEHICLE APPROACHING)

(HACKING)

BON APPETIT.

(CHUCKLING)

(WOMAN PANTING)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(STRAINING, SCREAMING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(SCREAMING)

(SPEAKING LANGUAGE)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING THROUGHOUT)

THAT IS THE CHERRY ON TOP.

(SCREAMING)

GAME'S OVER.

(SCREAMING)

(BABY CRYING)

"A VOICE SAID,

"LOOK ME IN THE STARS.

"AND TELL ME TRULY,
MEN OF EARTH,

"IF ALL THE SOUL AND BODY SCARS

WERE NOT TOO MUCH
TO PAY FOR BIRTH."

(BABY CRYING)

(GROWLING)

(SNARLING)

(THUDDING FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

♪

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT WHO I AM ♪

♪ AND I MOVE
TOO FAST IN MY HEAD ♪

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT
FIGURE OUT ♪

♪ AND I MOVE TOO FAST
MOVE TOO FAST ♪

♪ I CANNOT SUSTAIN
THESE FEELINGS YET ♪

♪ THERE'S TOO MUCH RUNNING
THROUGH MY HEAD ♪

♪ I'M BATTLING
AGAINST WHAT I FEEL ♪

♪ NEVER SURE I'M NEVER REAL ♪

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT PLEASE WAIT STOP WAIT ♪

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT WHO I AM ♪

♪ AND I MOVE
TOO FAST IN MY HEAD ♪

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT
FIGURE OUT ♪

♪ AND I MOVE TOO FAST
MOVE TOO FAST ♪

(UNINTELLIGIBLE SINGING)

♪ I CANNOT DESTROY
THESE THOUGHTS I GET ♪

♪ THERE'S TOO MUCH RUNNING
THROUGH MY HEAD ♪

♪ I'M BATTLING
AGAINST WHAT I FEEL ♪

♪ NEVER SURE I'M EVER REAL ♪

♪ I CANNOT HEAR MYSELF THINK ♪

♪ I JUST WANT TO ENJOY
ONE PEACEFUL DAY ♪

♪ I CANNOT HEAR MYSELF THINK ♪

♪ I JUST WANT TO ENJOY
ONE PEACEFUL DAY ♪

♪ SO...

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT WHO I AM ♪

♪ AND I MOVE
TOO FAST IN MY HEAD ♪

♪ HARD TO FIGURE OUT
FIGURE OUT ♪

♪ AND I MOVE TOO FAST
MOVE TOO FAST ♪

♪ I CANNOT SUSTAIN
THESE FEELINGS YET ♪

♪ THERE'S TOO MUCH RUNNING
THROUGH MY HEAD ♪

♪ I'M BATTLING
AGAINST WHAT I FEEL ♪

♪ NEVER SURE I'M EVER REAL ♪

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT PLEASE WAIT STOP WAIT ♪

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT

♪ WAIT ♪