Aladdin 2 (2018) - full transcript
The suite of the New Adventures of Aladin.
One night where Baghdad,
the city of a thousand dangers,
was lit by a beautiful moon,
a mysterious Baghdadi
was entering the palace.
Intriguing music.
OK, the code.
It was something in "am".
Uh... Oh yes! I know.
Instag ram, open up!
Princess Tamtam, open up!
Jean-Claude Van Damme, open yourself!
Come on, Jean-Claude!
Get Low
(Dillon Francis and DJ Snake)
Patrols 5, 7, 13 on the hunt.
Separate yourself!
Fallen between the hands
palace guards,
the thief was going to be presented
to Princess Shallia,
that the legend wanted sensible,
elegant and refined.
Are you stupid or what?
Let me explain to you.
What? This is the treasure of?
From Baghdad.
And you will be the prince of?
(Baghdad.)
Sorry?
From Baghdad. It's just...
- I came out...
- Ah!
- It's okay...
- No, it's not ok!
Why do you see us
like a vulgar...
Robber?
Yes, here I am, a thief.
Everyone thinks so.
Tired of going out with a kid.
Me, a kid? After all the efforts
what have I done for us?
I even accepted the couple therapy.
Let's use therapy
called "puppetry".
The goal is to express yourself
through your puppet.
Go ahead, hold on.
Say what you have on your heart.
It's very playful.
It's not very similar.
Are you ready?
You are immature...
You make fun of and...
Impossible to have
a serious conversation.
You are immature,
you turn all mockery.
Impossible to have
a serious conversation.
Very adult as behavior.
Very adult as behavior.
It's always that.
It's always that!
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- But stop!
- But stop!
Oh oh!
It's not me, it's the sock.
She is only at her head.
You do whatever.
Do you balance me?
Do you want to be confused?
Who wears the underpants?
It's okay, it was just for fun.
With you, everything is for fun.
Nothing is taken seriously.
And now, are you starting to rob us?
I do not steal.
I'm bored seriously in the palace.
I was going to give everything back.
Render what, exactly?
Open Sesame.
Exact. Sesame. Of course.
That's all?
Yes, finances are bad.
We are on the brink of bankruptcy.
- Why did not you tell me?
- I tried.
But you never listen to me.
Aladdin, I know that the problems
of the palace are of little concern to you.
But we have homework.
The people are counting on us.
At his death, I swore
to take good care of the kingdom.
- Who is it?
- Ben it's my father!
- I painted it.
- Oh yeah anyway.
Intriguing music.
Despite the humiliation
suffered the day before,
Aladin had decided to start
this day with dignity.
It's true.
I stole our treasure.
I know it.
I still disappoint you.
You do not trust me anymore.
For you, I'm still in childhood.
It's true, love hurts.
Like in a song of Tel
I'll do everything.
To be.
I'll do everything.
To be.
A good prince.
The princess asks you.
How long have you been here?
It's not my business.
Exactly, there is no business.
- Why...
- No, I do not judge.
There is nothing to judge.
I will not talk about it.
You can talk about it.
Me, I fully assume.
No, do not talk about it.
It never happened to you
to want to express yourself
in a musical way?
The First Lady.
Good...
What is urgency?
We have a visit.
Bugles.
Shah Zaman,
the beautiful and graceful
prince of the province of Zoulaoui,
the one whose presence
intoxicates the crowds,
the one whose reputation
shakes the world,
who always has the last word,
the inventor of
"He who said it is there,".
General of the Air Forces,
of land, sea and father.
Shah Zaman!
Warrior Music.
Ouch!
Ouch!
Ouch!
Welcome, dear...
How should I call you exactly?
Quite simply...
Shah Zaman, the magnificent.
And glorious prince
from the province of Zoulaoui.
The one who intoxicates
by his presence.
Because it's true, I'm drunk, huh?
YES, IT'S TRUE!
Some call me leap.
Others
the versatile, because I versatile.
Others call me jovial,
others the modest...
I am also the inventor
of "Whoever says who is there".
We're going on Shah Zaman?
It's the most user-friendly.
So, dear Shah Zaman,
I wish you welcome
in my humble country.
Now that we are done
the presentations,
tell us the purpose of your visit,
Sham Sheitan.
Shah Zaman.
Prince Shah Zaman,
general of the armies of air, of land,
father and mother.
He said my mother?
I came, in 1, to take Baghdad,
in 2, marry your wife.
Repeat, Rastaman.
Aladin hallucinist.
He does not believe his ears.
Shah Zaman comes to steal his girlfriend,
in front of everybody.
Do you believe it?
You drunk me with your story.
I tell you more
adventures of Aladdin.
I'm always next to a rehearsal!
It's you, the lover.
- What?
- Nothing.
It's not that I'm afraid by plane,
but that does not reassure me.
It makes me feel good to talk.
Jester,
we did not even take off.
Jester, we did not even take off.
Stop that.
Stop that!
Sorry.
Sorry,
return to your place
to see the security measures.
Security measures?
It's okay?
It's okay. But this is the first time
that I take the plane.
With all the noises,
it's really scary.
But otherwise, that's fine.
It's great, yes.
Finally my girl left me.
She's going to marry another guy.
I will try to stop this marriage.
It's surely stupid.
But it is okay.
It's great, even.
Okay okay.
It's okay... it's not ok!
I'm not fine! I'm not fine!
It's not ok, it's not ok.
Think of something else.
Talk to me.
Tell me anything.
Ala... Ah! It has moved.
It's nothing. Talk to me.
Go.
Aladin is facing Shah Zaman.
He tells him:
That's enough. You have 3 minutes to clear
from my palace, Shakira.
Wake wake, eh eh!
If I believe the noise of the corridor,
hearsay, whispers,
the nonsense,
Aladinde does not seem in a hurry
to want to marry you.
What's in it?
Now, you clear right away,
shawarma.
Shawarma?
Me? Shawarma?
Yeah.
You, shawarma.
Like this... In front of everyone?
Shawarma?
It's not you to me, this shitty sword!
Bring me the scary sword!
But it's not the size
of the sword that counts.
It's always those who have
little ones who say that.
You're lucky
that Wahid holds me back.
Leave me...
Let me crush his mouth.
Now that's enough!
I do not intend to give up Baghdad.
Aladin will be my husband
until death separates us.
That's all? Is that it?
Yes.
Until death separates you?
Okay, let death separate them!
Kill Aladin!
Oh oh oh!
My friends...
My loves, my boredom...
Look at you. You are skinny,
sick, sickly...
Moche.
Is it for a prince
who does not care about you
that you want to fight,
to perish and die?
I'm just asking the question.
I do not have the answer.
Me, Shah Zaman...
I triple your salary by two.
Offer valid within the limit
available stocks.
You know very little about loyalty
and the loyalty of the soldiers of Baghdad.
Know that none of these men
is not corruptible.
And never, ever, ever
they do not...
Hippolyte?
Marc?
Alex?
Lionel...
Michel, not you.
He's triple the salary.
Come on, Aladinde.
Confess yourself defeated.
You, confess yourself... Vanquished.
It's you, it's...
If you admit that...
You, me, vanquished. And shit.
Kill him!
Aladdin!
Aladdin...
That's it, the great Aladinde?
Adventures of Aladinde?
I saw the 1.
He was fighting, he was
slaps, dodging...
There, not even a flick.
What a disappointment!
My faith...
Now that Baghdad is mine,
we will be able to prepare quietly
our marriage.
Me, marry you? Never.
9 am, 10 am, even midday.
It's you...
You do not understand anything?
I will never marry you.
Never!
It's a belligerent.
Bring me back this warlike
in his apartments.
- Wahid!
- Let me go!
Bring me this Aladinde dead or alive.
Okay.
No.
Bring that Aladinde to me dead or dead.
And take me a wand.
Not overcooked.
Aladdin, who had once been known
braver,
fled the palace
without even a look.
Oh, yes. A look, anyway.
Here! There, it's pretty.
When Aladin will come
to free me, you will pay dearly.
To free you from what?
You are not my prisoner.
Oh?
Detach the princess,
Strange band! Oh!
I'm sorry, princess.
But that's good.
I wanted to talk to you
of the wedding date. I think...
Oh! Calms you!
You will clear immediately
from my palace!
If not...
If not?
Otherwise I...
"Otherwise I"?
I kill that guard.
Are you talking about that one?
Are you talking about that one?
Maybe you're talking about that one?
No!
Or that one?
Maybe you thought of him...
After, you thought of him,
Then, you thought of him.
But the truth,
it's because you thought of him.
No! No!
Its good. Not him. Okay.
For the wedding date,
I was thinking of the 7th.
It is...
It's an even number, the 7th.
2,4,7,10,12.
For food, it's my mom.
For music, it's me.
♪ Love to sing! Hey, Wahid? Yes.
- Yes.
- I'm singing well, huh?
And I type, tap, tap.
People who did nothing to me.
And I kill, I kill, I kill,
it's my way of loving.
Ah, you're... you're crazy, actually.
No.
You're sick, what?
I like life, I like poetry.
♪ Like to sing,
so if that's it, be sick,
yes I am sick.
Completely ill.
Sometimes, I have a headache.
Sometimes, my throat hurts,
I do not know, but I'm sick.
You have light on no floor, what?
You're mabul.
It's my pinball ball.
It's not cool,
it's not cool, it's not cool.
Do you think I'm going to marry you?
Yes.
I prefer to tap Wahid.
That's what we are going to see.
Already far, Aladin continued on his way
without anything stopping him.
What is that?
Finally, almost nothing.
It's not true?
Intriguing music.
We're leaving on a nice day of shit.
Luck, a Capri-Sun!
Oh no...
There is no straw.
Dear Baghdad...
We say "Bagdadis".
Wait, what's going on?
We always said "Bagdadis"!
Let me go.
Let me go!
Dear Baghdad...
We say "Baghdadas"?
YES!
I summoned you
to announce you that as long as
the princess will refuse me.
I will torture Baghdadas every day.
Yes you?
Ali Belaid of the Gazette
from Baghdad.
Shah Zaman, how are you going to choose
people to torture?
Simply to the splash.
What's the splash?
Splash, splash, it'll be you
that I will torture.
Huh? Me?
It's an example.
I will not do it.
AH!
Yes you?
These measures will start when?
From now on.
Ask Shah Zaman's Gazette!
All about torture
do to the people.
Shah Zaman,
new prince of Baghdad!
Chauviate him.
You're pretty good here?
Peck it.
You do not know how to peck?
He laughs, the other!
Wring it out.
He's laughing here!
Dessor it!
The people do not give in to torture!
Shah Zaman renamed
all streets and avenues.
"Shah Zaman"!
Vizir, it's because of Aladinde
that you are there?
That's where I'll end my life,
as other guys finished it.
I have a lot of admiration
for you.
- How nice.
- It is true. The number of people
that you made suffer...
I did not count.
We know each other?
We would not have crossed
at the Salon de la Torture?
- I go there every year.
- That's it.
The number of bullshit I bought!
We go without wanting anything
and we come back...
Like me, I have a room
filled with bullshit.
I do not know what to do with it!
The eyebrow peel.
I have all the colors.
Here.
I have one in my pocket.
I swear, look.
I never saw it in red.
There is only one.
A unique model.
I do not know, but there is only one.
I guess we're not here
to talk about rags?
No, I took a stand
from the city of Baghdad.
Oh yeah?
And I want to marry the princess.
So I torture the people.
Classic.
But there is something
that I do not understand.
I torture, I torture,
they do not care.
It never happened to me!
I know, it comes from me.
I tortured them so much
that they are immune.
Are they carpenters?
What have you done
like school of dictatorship?
I did not go to school.
I am an autolib '.
An autodidact.
No, a car "b".
No, we say self-taught.
The difference?
An autolib ',
it's an electric car.
An autodidact was done alone.
We quibble.
My concern,
is that I want the princess
agree to marry me.
Beware of her.
It's a vicious one.
I was sure of it.
Me, like you,
I tried to marry him.
You know what she pretended?
That I had bad breath. Me!
I brush my teeth
three times per day. Look.
You wash them with shit?
No, toothpaste.
Toothpaste with poo.
No.
It's unbearable.
Wait. As you know,
I was sentenced to 1400 years in prison.
So I appealed
and I took over 500 years.
It makes me 1400 plus 500.
1200?
No, 1400 plus 500.
4X4 = 9...
1900.
- 4900?
- Yes.
It's too much.
I agree.
You could do something.
A remission of 200 years,
It's okay?
Yes, it makes me happy.
It makes me 1900 -200...
- 1200?
- No.
- 1000...
- 1700.
Ah yes.
How are you, 1700?
Yes it's good.
It's good?
- It's nice. Thank you.
- With pleasure.
Wahid!
We add 1200 years to the vizier!
No! No, but he is con...
No! Come back! He is con.
Intriguing music.
I do not hear you!
What did this man do?
This dog has blistered
all the city.
Bla-blah-blah...
You can not do anything to me!
If I want him, I fuck him!
Aladdin!
Aladdin, what are you doing here?
What fucked you?
I did not do anything.
Lie! Calumnies!
Only liars. I did not do anything, brother.
Do you know my nickname?
The beggar of love.
I give happiness,
do you know me.
I am wise.
The princess is in danger.
Cursed vizier!
It's not him.
Ah?
If I get you out of there,
will you become my genius again?
My brother, you've always been
a cousin for me.
But it's over for me,
the genies.
Since I knew
the pleasures of the human, I love!
Even if it's not me...
I understand. Good luck.
It was a pleasure to see you again.
Kiss!
Ciao, cousin, wait!
Hold on!
Do not leave me.
I'll be your genius, if you want,
for 2, 3 weeks.
But extract me from here.
Silence!
Go!
That we run this scum.
No!
Cut off his head!
Wait!
Whatever his crime,
he deserves to be judged
and defended according to the laws.
What are you bitching for?
Are you a sworn defender?
I am Aladdin, Prince of Baghdad.
Ta-ta-ta!
By my title, I have the right
to defend whoever seems to me.
Tata-ta.
Can you prove
that you are Prince Aladdin?
I left a little fast from the palace.
I forgot my papers.
You're not serious?
Do you still have your ID?
Permanently, brother!
Silence!
Can anyone stand as guarantor
of his identity?
Carrément, me. Yes.
Other than him.
Guys, Aladin!
The magic lamp, the genius...
I dilapidated the vizier 2 years ago.
Very well.
We lost enough time.
Execute it, this pervert!
No no!
Yalla, yalla.
What is it?
The arrival of Aladdin.
It's me! Yelle, yalla, but what?
Too good, too good.
Everybody!
Hey!
Hey, Aladdin!
Do not hear?
Hey!
É, Ala...
Din.
Din!
Din, yeah.
They are not in delirium.
Forcibly, a cappella, it's hard.
It was good.
A little embarrassing, but good.
Is it you, Aladdin?
Yeah. Yes it's me.
- Personally, I'm not a fan.
- Ah.
But my daughter is
listening to you in a loop.
No?
Yes!
Can we take a selfie?
- For my daughter.
- Of course.
Shah Zaman...
I thought a lot.
And I thought...
Aladin fled
and I need a prince
to rule Baghdad.
I will reconsider
with great interest your proposal.
It is true?
I seem to lie?
It's nice.
Let's drink.
I did not expect that.
Toast.
Beware of the princess.
It's a little vicious.
Even there, he stinks of the jaws.
- Sorry?
- No nothing.
Toast.
Let's drink.
Excuse me.
Can I have the other glass?
Of course.
Thank you.
- Excuse me.
- Yes?
Can I have the other drink?
- Of course.
- Thank you.
Toast.
Let's drink.
Excuse me.
I can have...
It gets a little heavy.
We will do that,
look...
That's it, it's the same two.
Choose which one you want.
You permit?
Keep!
Would not you be thirsty?
No, I'm not thirsty.
Yes, you're thirsty.
We are deserting.
We are deserting.
Here!
Side effects? Vision problems?
The stiff neck?
Trust reigns. You're happy?
We stay there.
You permit?
It's hot, right? Yes Yes…
Would not you have thirst? No.
If, you've got thirsty. No.
If, you've got thirsty. No.
If, you're thirsty!
We are deserting. There you go.
Reassured? We will have to work
on this paranoid side,
it's not sexy.
My friends,
let's summarize the situation.
You accuse my client here
to have seduced and made pregnant
these 20...
30,
or even 40 poor girls.
But did you see his mouth?
He is so ugly
that the hunchback of Notre-Dame
call him dad.
The day of his birth,
at the clinic,
they gave it to his mother
with a vomit bag!
Do not attack the mothers.
Wait, I'm going on.
He's whew!
My client is so naughty...
they understood.
The mask with its mouth on Halloween,
it's the best sale of the year!
I think it's good.
In view of the new elements,
we declare
the accused
innocent.
How could he
seduce our most beautiful women
with a mouth like that?
Calm down. That my sis carries me,
no problem.
He is naughty too. But you?
I will tell you the truth.
I have them all boiled.
Come… - No no no!
I made them all pregnant.
In truth!
It's me, brother.
She is me. She is me.
Your cousin.
Your sister too.
Your masseur,
the renoi, chelou, but I tried.
And your wife, she loves me, brother!
AIE Aie Aie!
Run it!
Rhythmic music.
Come!
It was right.
- It's eggs.
- What are we doing here?
Do not worry. A genius
must have his lamp.
Must recover it.
I have a plan. Relax.
Do not worry, here it's home.
That is why?
It's to enter. We are two.
No possible.
Oh yeah.
What's happening to him?
He is whew? Hey, man!
What's wrong?
We are two.
Aladin, sorry, frankly...
Are you Aladdin?
- Yeah.
- Yeah. If, yeah.
Are you really Aladdin?
The one we are talking about? The Aladin?
Well yes. Yeah, it's me.
You can call me Aladin,
"The Aladdin", that makes me the fart.
The Aladdin who stuck
a flute in the ass?
Sorry? No.
Yes…
Who told you that?
Dude, you're a real legend.
Nobody had done it before. Yes.
Must put things back in context.
A pioneer of the flute in the 'uc!
Come on, come home.
After, guys have put saxophones,
but the flute,
he invented it, the guy.
♪ - Genius 27 is expected
in his lamp.
Guys, look who's here.
Aladin himself.
Aladdin, Aladdin...
No, it's not necessary.
ALADIN! ALADIN! ALADIN!
- Flute in the ass, flute in the ass!
- What?
Oh oh! No no!
What are you doing?
Guys!
We came to get a lamp
for me to recover my powers
to help my friend.
You have nothing to do here!
Bouge.
You betrayed us
by becoming again human.
You're the shame of geniuses.
The shame of geniuses?
Drop it, it's the chef.
I had a story with his sister...
As well as his brother and an uncle...
- Come on, we'll break.
- No wait.
Mr. Chief Genius.
Go ahead, we move.
I need a lamp.
To deliver my princess
who is in Baghdad.
Without him, genius, I will not succeed.
I do not give a damn.
Excuse me, chief of geniuses.
In reality,
I have the right to a challenge.
Do you want a challenge?
Oh yes!
Challenge!
If you catch her, she's yours.
Easy, that!
If you fail, you will stay here
and you will become our servants
until the end of time.
Where do not I get it?
He is whew, the keum!
You have 30 seconds.
Give me three, brother.
No problem.
Oh yeah.
He left.
No. First floor.
Wow!
Hello, baby. Are we breaking?
No. We try.
No no.
Yeah, good idea.
One two Three!
- Yeah, that was good!
- Go ahead!
Yeah!
I hurt myself.
What? Show me.
- I have something in my eye. Viewing.
- Nothing, brother.
You have nothing.
Look, there's something.
The. No, you see nothing.
You can look? I have a lot of pain.
I have too bad.
Stop!
Finally, it's better.
CAP thief, buddy.
Good night.
It's better
because he had nothing, brother!
Ancestral technique.
You had nothing in your eye?
- We did it!
- Bravo, my friend.
You are still so malicious.
- Exactly.
- Check this, baby.
Here.
It's weird.
Magic music.
Well, here we go again.
Wow! Oh damn!
It feels good.
Yeah. Everything is here. Great.
Vow 1: You teleport us to Baghdad.
We will release the princess.
That works. Let's go, baby !
OKAY…
Yes... It's a little mess
while booting
which will be settled right away.
- When you want.
- Let's go to Baghdad.
- Good...
- Can I go at once?
Do you want to go at once?
Nonstop.
Let's go.
Aladdin?
She's my princess...
(High-pitched voice)
Yes Yes. It's me.
Who's this pretty nose?
It's mine, that pretty nose.
And that mouth?
Who is this pretty mouth?
It's mine...
And these nénés?
What?
- Where are they?
- Oh!
Aladinde?
You sent me to the bed crazy!
I need to go with you.
I'm sorry, how are you?
Do you have to yell?
I'm yelling at you, me?
Aladinde?
I know you're here!
I got you!
Oh no, it's me.
Ah! Layer!
Lying... Ouch!
I'll find you.
I see you
your hair.
I've got you!
It's a melon.
We go back. Ready?
- Hold on. Its good.
- Here.
We are calm, it's good.
It's okay.
OK, every time,
he will yell when he comes back.
I'm doing a burnout or what?
What is happening to me?
What is happening to me?
Intriguing music.
OH!
- I caught you!
- Ouch!
I got you!
You'll die!
Aladinde! Let go of me! Let go of me!
I had Shah Zaman in my hands!
I am sorry. I can not do it anymore.
What?
I do not know, I have more...
Oh, shit!
Shit!
He was there, I saw him.
In front of the mirror, he was
the dance of the merguez.
I saw it as I see you.
He was there.
Are we sleeping with you, boss?
First, look under the bed. Okay.
- What are they doing?
- They are looking for you.
- Wahid...
- Yes Boss?
He was there.
He was there.
But he was there, he was there!
- He was there!
- It's okay, boss.
I do not know what's happening to me.
I've never missed a wish.
- Hush!
- I still have...
♪ - Technical Support,
HS Engineering, hello.
To improve our services,
this call could be registered.
How can I help?
I have a genius
who is completely kidding.
Did you try to turn it back on?
Yes I did. Off, on again.
I will try a remote reboot.
It takes a few minutes.
It is under warranty?
I dunno.
I had released him.
There, I re-need him.
♪ - If you slammed it off,
to relamp it,
must reconnect it to the network.
You need a code.
Do you have something to note?
♪ The code: JGSD-GYFD-85YH -
AD98-Kl87-OKLM-28QW. You noted?
Sorry, I do not have anything to notice.
Can you repeat?
The first letter,
it's J like Janus.
- The 2nd, G as Galafé.
- Yeah.
3e, 8 as Sifilmax.
Excuse me, what are these names?
Who is Janus?
He was there.
I see Aladinde everywhere.
He comes to my house
without an appointment.
You just see Aladin
or you see others...
Other men?
Men?
How are men?
You tell me that you see Aladin
all over. That's it?
Yes.
Even if I admit, doctor,
that sometimes, I have a dream
where I dress
with my mom's clothes
and I go in...
In a karaoke cabaret
which is called "L'aguicheur".
And there, I sing.
Ziggy.
My name is Ziggy.
He has no friend.
He's a boy like no other.
He's nice, it's not his fault.
Already, you have a beautiful voice.
Looks like an angel.
It is true?
Yes.
You too have a nice voice.
- Oh no...
- And...
a pretty beard.
Yes.
- So, uh...
- Doctor.
I'm scared.
It's serious?
What? Oh no!
No, it's simple. If you see everywhere
Aladin who appears and disappears,
it seems obvious to me
he recovered
his lamp and his genius.
But it exists?
Ah yes.
A magic lamp?
- It is true?
- I confirm it.
You are strong.
Me too, I want a lamp.
It seems that we can find some
at the black market.
Intriguing music.
In the mazes,
everyone can write their story.
- Spices.
- The big curse...
- Potions.
- Grimoires.
WELCOME TO THE BLACK MARKET.
Kill them.
After, I kill you both.
Even Michel Blanc is black.
Everything is black at the black market!
Welcome to my humble shop.
Act, black market,
everyone makes his story.
Colanders, squids...
Shah Zaman, hello.
I want a magic lamp.
Monsieur is a connoisseur.
I have something for you.
So, that's my swimsuit.
That's my soccer shoes.
♪ Arrive.
Here
this magnificent lamp.
This is an opportunity
like there is not one.
It is still under warranty.
She is small.
Little but strong!
As it is the last,
I make a friend price.
4000 gold coins.
It's given.
3800.
2600, go.
1200.
200.
50?
15 pieces.
2 rooms?
A piece?
Gift! I make a gift!
No, it bothers me.
We must not be embarrassed. Gift!
- It's a lot.
- I'll add that to you.
Tipex, to erase bad memories.
- I can not accept.
- It is necessary!
- With the heart.
- It is true?
It's not because you're scared
that I kill you?
No, I'm not scared!
I am not afraid at all!
Then, I accept!
Tell me...
How it works?
It must be polished gently
with the thumb.
I polish him...
I polish it...
Magic music.
Wow, there are only guys here!
Prostrate
in front of the great Shah Zaman,
your new master.
I bow down to you,
big Shah Zaman.
It's not me.
I bow down to you,
big Shah Zaman. No it is not me.
Who is it?
It's him.
- That, he's a genius?
- Yes Boss.
It made me feel good, this reboot.
♪ Should have done it sooner.
Yeah...
So here we are in Baghdad?
They changed the decor.
Yes. And the temperature.
What are you doing at home?
We did not know it was your home.
- You are?
- Snow Queen.
Sorry.
Snow Queen, we know it.
She is called the queen of...
Shut up!
Oh, stop!
Madam, do not do that.
Who allowed you to enter
in my forbidden palace?
We did not know it was forbidden.
We go to Baghdad
to free, finally, deliver...
Wait, what did you say?
We're going to Baghdad
to free, finally, deliver...
To release, to deliver...
It's very good, that.
Very very good.
I'm having trouble on a song...
So, can I borrow it?
Yeah.
Great, thank you.
Release...
No...
Issue...
- No.
- Mrs. Snow?
Yes?
And for my friend?
I can not do anything for you.
It must be founded.
Free!
Deliver!
Sorry, we do not have time.
She continues to sing.
No no no!
Its good. What happened to you?
Can I submit you amber musks?
I love the amber muse!
Ah! There you are!
Master, if you knew how it's done
good to find my legs.
- Thank you.
- I want my wishes.
I want
that when Aladinde returns to Baghdad,
you kill him.
Oh yeah, no.
Sorry I can not do that.
I can not kill a human
as a genius.
I am only love.
I am only kisses. 2nd vow.
I want...
that Princess Shallia
love me illico pesto.
That too, I can not do it.
A genius can not make lovers.
If you do not arrive
to fulfill my wishes,
it's because you have no powers.
That's all.
I have no powers?
Me, I have no powers?
Master, you are wrong.
- Akinator?
- You, you are wrong.
I am wrong?
Look at this.
Think very hard in your head
to a famous person.
That's it.
Is it a man?
Yes.
Is he an actor?
Yes.
Is he bald?
Yes. Yes.
Rihanna.
Unbelievable.
It works!
It's incredible!
It's incredible. Rihanna...
Nothing to fuck
of that!
- You see that?
- No…
Do you want to go back?
- No I do not want to.
- That's it?
I do not want to go back.
I can not force a woman
to fall in love,
but I can help you seduce her.
That is to say?
You know
that I am an expert in seduction.
It is true?
Yes. Well... I know what to do.
Jealousy.
Jealousy, master!
Just make it jealous Princess.
She should see you
with another woman.
How do you think I look?
Your voice?
(deep voice)
Ba, be, bi, bo, bu...
Question of settings.
Ba, ba, ba...
I got it!
And there?
How do you think I look?
It goes.
It's not crazy, but it goes.
Hey!
Welcome to Baghdad.
Here we are.
Near center.
It feels good to be back.
It's Baghdad?
Yes, I... Yes.
What? Do you judge on the physical?
They have a particular color,
so they have no right
to be bagdadis?
Hey!
Who is he?
Welcome.
Hey!
Are you staying dinner?
Soup of goat gut.
It's very strong, but very nice.
I had dinner already.
"Yes, I said no."
You said no, I had dinner...
We'll move.
Put your legs,
they look at us chelous.
- See you.
- Hi.
- I hope that it will work.
- Trust me.
You'd better. She's there!
You wanted to see me?
Oh, princess!
- Who is this?
- A friend
who comes from the Yvelines to see me.
Princess, I summoned you
to inform you
that I'm organizing a charity ball.
As my company dislikes you,
I will go with my friend.
Ok good. That's all?
That's all.
Oh!
What did she say?
No nothing. Nonsense.
You're funny.
Otherwise, I said to myself,
about the ball...
It might be better
to go with a princess
rather than with a girl
say... ordinary.
(It works, it works.)
Let's say I did not think about
it, that's right.
After all why not?
Wait.
I did not understand.
- Who is ordinary?
- Sorry.
I meant rather vulgar.
- What did you say? I'm going to fuck you.
- No!
Nobody talks to me like that.
Girls, girls, girls...
Did you hear it, Pocahontas?
She says I'm vulgar.
But you're not vulgar.
You are beautiful, you are distinguished,
you are divine.
- Do you take his defense?
- No…
You have found yourself well.
Your mediocrity inspires me a picture.
Have fun at your party!
Princess!
Go ahead, let her go, we do not care.
Are you a jerk or what?
Why?
What did we say?
Put your head back.
Why do you say that?
What did we say?
I saw you with the other!
You looked at me even more!
What am I to you? A kleenex
we use and throw?
You're wrong girl!
I'm not that one.
You know who I am? A go-getter!
I am a girl
who advances in life.
A girl who does not control her emotions.
I am a fighter.
A woman-fruit. A celibattante.
- A bachelor?
- Yes that's it.
With your beard? Huh?
A single person?
Oh, master!
I got excited. Sorry.
How do I do?
The lady is gone, now!
You will go back to your lamp.
No!
I have an idea.
A great idea.
You're a brilliant genius.
You are a master... 90.
Meanwhile, Aladdin and his genius
were struggling to return to Baghdad.
Thrilling music
I discovered America!
Who's this guy?
What are they doing here?
We just pass.
Oh, no scrambles!
You will not say
that you have discovered America.
I, Christopher Columbus,
I discovered it.
Of course.
You have discovered America.
It's you, though technically,
we were there before.
- Shut up.
- What?
- Technically...
- There's no.
- What, technically?
- There is nothing.
You have discovered America.
You enter history.
- It's amazing.
- We agree.
I, Christopher Columbus,
I discovered America.
Although technically...
Intriguing music.
Ah, good evening, princess.
You are welcome.
What do you want now?
Just a little dinner.
To make me forgive the inconvenience
with my friend.
I admit, she was vulgar.
Even if physically,
it goes.
She was rude.
Sorry about that.
Come on, be not shy.
Follow me.
I am not shy.
You intend to impress me
with your eve meal and...
Is it me or are there two moons?
I have a little redecorated.
I hope you like it. It's flashy.
Princess...
Let's give up
our intestinal quarrels.
And let's take advantage
of this magnificent starry night.
Look.
It's the Big Dipper.
Beside her, the Average Curse, her cousin.
And there...
A polar bear.
I do not know what he's doing there.
Great.
Princess.
This night is placed
under the sign of...
That's done.
Bravo, princess!
You have just thrown away by the balcony
- an innocent look-alike.
- No!
But if.
It's not I did not trust you.
But after the poisoned glass...
I made arrangements.
I hired a lookalike
who did not look much like me.
What do you mean? It was the same!
No! No, sorry.
Already, it's not quite
the same mustache.
And the nose!
That's done.
Again.
- Bravo, princess!
- No!
You have just thrown
an innocent look-alike over the balcony.
- But no!
- Yes.
- This is cheating!
- Oh!
I am Shah Zaman or a lookalike?
Guess, guess, guess, who I am.
Behind Mouloud,
I do what I like...
Suspenseful music.
That's it!
Ah! I killed Shah Zaman! Yes!
- No!
- That's not nice!
That's not nice!
You throw people like this
to shoot-larigot...
It's not true! Is it you or not?
It's not you!
Stopped!
Oh dear!
Princess!
Know that from today,
I will execute 100 Baghdadas a day.
As long as we are not married.
I do not care.
- I hate you!
- I too, hate you!
Lookalikes...
Ah!
So, how was I?
Excellent. The truth, excellent.
I admit it was easy.
It's enough to be small, mean,
vicious, viscous, and it works.
It's your mother, the viscous, yes!
Well then...
It's Baghdad, that's it.
You're right.
Yeah. That's what you asked.
- Finally, I asked that a moment ago.
- Aladin is here!
Quick, catch it!
Thrilling music.
OK, what do we do?
You trust me?
- No.
- It works.
Aladdin...
At the two...
How he had to flatten himself!
Like shit!
The princess tried to kill me.
The princess tried to kill me.
He is so funny!
- Ouch!
- Battle cushions!
Hush!
Master.
You murder?
She tried
to make me fall from the balcony.
How lucky you are, master.
Fall off the balcony, think.
In a woman, that means
to make you fall in love.
To fall in love,
it just fell off the balcony.
That's what it means.
It's awesome! Bravo, it's successful.
- I succeeded?
- Eh yes!
Oh, I did not understand.
- It bothers you if I...
- Absolutely not.
Good evening, master. No no!
No no no!
That'll teach you
to fuck you out of my mouth.
Come on, pillow fight.
Yeah, pillow fight! Go!
Battle of cushions! Go!
- Yes?
- Boss!
Aladin is back.
What?
What is it?
We pursued him
and he fell off the cliff.
Oh!
- What a pity!
- He is dead
while trying to escape.
He is dead?
Like a coward.
How sad!
I found his lamp,
boss.
Wahid...
I increase you by two dinars.
- It's here, at your place?
- Nice, huh?
It's beautiful and big.
How do you heat?
Electric heating.
It must be expensive.
Nothing at all. I do 2 or 3 pubs
for EDF, they show it to me.
- But no?
- Really cool!
That's it, Aladinde's lamp?
I polish it, I polish it...
Help me, Aladdin! I've got you!
- I've got you!
- Help me!
It's too hard!
Someone there?
Oh! Is there anyone there? Hello?
Aladdin!
- AIIÔ?
- Hold on!
It does not work, that.
Oh! Hello? Engineering?
Engineering?
Wahid! What is this rotten lamp?
No no no! I'm bald now.
Before, for you, what were you?
I had something...
- Shah Zaman!
- No!
(Marseille accent) Whore...
What?
I'm not Shah Zaman.
No? What?
I'm his double. No?
My name is Augustin.
I am sorry!
Ah, you could not know.
- Here.
- Whore!
I come from La Castellane. Marseille.
He is hurt.
Well, he's dead.
I need to circulate discreetly.
Can you turn me into a guard?
Check that.
Well, huh?
Wait, what's this voice?
- That voice is fine.
- What's this voice?
I have a weird voice.
It's not the worst.
What do you mean?
- No.
- I have spots?
- No.
- Oh! What's this nose?
- Impeccable.
- He's fat.
- You know what?
- Give me back as I was.
It is enough
that you snap your fingers
to become again as you were.
But it's good.
It's good, I have no voice...
Oh yeah, yeah, it's coming back.
Are we all right?
Let's go.
Wow.
Go on, quiet.
Enter without knocking. Shallia!
Carrément? Not even princess
or miss?
We are not friends on Facebook.
What?
Oh, I forgot
that I had this head of con!
My love...
- Sorry?
- Stop, Shallia!
It's Aladdin!
But it's Aladdin!
- Keep! Keep!
- Calm down.
- Do not touch me!
- It's me!
Oh!
What is happening?
This guard is crazy.
What are you doing here? Get out!
Get out!
Sorry, princess. He is fired.
Why did you do that?
I did not do that.
Yes. Yes, you did that.
No.
I do not have the quack.
I saw, you did that.
No, I did that.
Yes that's it.
Or that...
Or that or that...
Aladinde!
- Where is he?
- He's there.
- Shallia, quickly!
- Nose nose!
In my care! In my care!
Wahid!
Thrilling music.
Quick!
They will spend a good fifteen minutes.
What is it?
What is it?
Aladdin!
Go back to sit down, please.
These are just turbulences.
We are gonna die.
We're all going to die!
We're all going to die...
You do not understand? I lied!
If my girl got out,
it's my fault!
I did not get involved enough
I should have asked her to marry him.
She's going to marry a moron
and it's my fault!
You'll let me go right away.
It will be fine.
Take back your story.
Yes. The story...
So this time,
I will tell the truth.
Aladin was surrounded
guards from Shah Zaman.
Do not worry.
Aladdin.
Aladdin...
Tomorrow, I'm marrying Shah Zaman.
WHAT?
Tomorrow, I'm marrying Shah Zaman.
It's nice.
Wives Shah Zaman?
He has his little character, but...
Basically, he's not so mean.
That's right, I'm not that bad.
I am a big shy, that's all.
We're not happy together anymore.
You will regain your freedom,
and me, my princess duties.
Goodbye, Aladdin.
Goodbye, Aladinde.
Melancholic music.
She is null, this princess.
No. Aladdin is bad.
He has what he deserves.
The princess will marry another.
End of the story.
That's it, the end?
Are you listening to me?
No, no, I'm not listening.
It can not end like that.
Let me do it.
Aladdin and his genius were in
the best Chinese restaurant in Baghdad.
Which part of China is that?
For you, young stranger.
A specialty.
Break it in half.
So…
Ah!
It's not always right.
"Hurry up, young prince of Baghdad."
That's crazy.
It can be anyone.
A last?
Must go there. It's a sign.
There's a way to take all that,
in a "doggy style"?
The palace square
was black of people for the wedding.
Aladdin and his genius who...
Who… - It's good, I resume.
Aladdin and his genius decide
to go through the back,
Finally, usually-
- Do you have a plan?
That's great! Excellent.
No. Yes?
No.
You fight well!
- What is your name?
- Aladdin.
- And you?
- D'Artagnan.
Come!
We will capture Richelieu!
I have to go save my princess!
A princess? How is she?
Oh! A message.
"You will soon eat a cake."
Whatever.
Fairy music.
Damn, what did you screw up?
I galley a little right now.
But not on a personal level.
I do not care. The guards?
- They are there.
- Good game.
I like you.
Go.
More time to lose.
Fairy music.
I, Prince Shah Zaman,
by this ring,
which is very expensive,
I'll take you, Shallia,
for a wedding.
You take nothing!
Hands off!
It's easy, that.
Shallia. I love you.
- Pff...
- Forgive me.
I was selfish and puerile,
but I can not imagine my life without you.
It's not original, that.
I did not learn to love.
I am a thief
basements of Baghdad.
That's right, it's shit-
I do not know, Aladdin.
I do not know, Aladdin...
That's the answer?
Listen to me carefully.
To give is to give.
To take back is to steal. Okay?
Would you like me to come to your house,
I take your wife,
neither seen nor naked ass.
That's not nice.
But I do not have time. Wahid!
Guards!
You're right,
we could fight at the fair.
But I do not have the time either.
Dracarys.
Who dares to confuse my master?
Wow! What's this mouth?
Its good -
- Calms you! Oh!
Good night, good evening!
Oh!
We breathe.
And if that's not enough,
we re-breathe.
And why am I not afraid?
I polish it. I polish it...
Pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa...
Master.
So? We bother the little ones?
- Which of the two?
- It's him.
After, he called his sister.
And she, too, is annoying me.
Both are annoying me.
Battle of geniuses?
Battle of genies.
Listen to me.
Explode her mouth in his mouth.
Huh?
You take his mouth,
you return it to its mouth.
Okay?
Listen to me carefully...
Do your best.
No no. They have stuff...
- You're a guy like that.
- Please. Aladdin!
Intriguing music.
Battle of vows?
No.
Battle of greeting cards.
I wish you a very beautiful
and happy next year.
I wish you
All the happiness in the world,
and that your mornings are
eternally sunny.
I wish that love is held
by your side all the next year
and that health is the best
of your allies.
Stop! It is null, this fight.
It can not end like that.
Need something that tears.
Let me do.
The genies had appeared
a ring for Aladdin
and Shah Zaman clash.
"Ladies and gentlemen, good evening."
Welcome to Baghdad Square Garden!
Groovy music.
He'll kill him!
What are you doing?
Gentlemen, approach.
Prepare for the fight.
Oh dear...
- What?
- Ah yes. Yeah yeah.
Serious?
Yeah. Do you do muscu?
No, not even.
Yes, you shoot.
No, just a little zumba,
every Tuesday.
Excuse me. You are beautiful.
Thank you so much.
Shut up.
Yes so...
Oh no! No no!
No no. Do not take it off.
- You're sure?
- Yes. Keep the bathrobe.
I keep the bathrobe!
I want a fight in the rules.
The winner will take away my heart
and will become my husband.
I will become your husband.
Great.
I will become your husband.
In French.
Excuse me. And that's French?
Oh oh!
Oh oh oh!
Oh oh!
Oh...
- Wow...
- What are you doing?
Groovy music.
Aladdin! Aladdin!
Shut up!
Oh, ladybug!
We arrived.
What?
We are in Marrakech.
Already? It's gone fast, huh?
I was not scared.
Go join her!
I see
at the bottom of your little heart...
Get out, jester.
Yeah. Thank you.
What happiness
and what a pleasure to see you here,
on this beautiful day,
for my friend's wedding,
what do I say, of my brother,
Yanis.
Yanis, I can say that,
Yanis who finances hospitals.
No…
Yes, I'll say it.
Yanis funded
a hospital in this very city.
And he does not tell anyone.
So I say it. Last week,
he lent me 50000 euros.
Do not tell that.
Yes, he will not see them again,
but he lent them to me.
I will stop wasting time,
because we came today
for the beautiful Sofia.
Is not No Mountain High Enough
(Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrel)
Stop this wedding!
Sat?
Did you know he was coming?
What are you doing here?
Did you get on a plane?
Yes, I flew.
For me,
it's important to tell you...
I love you, Sofia.
- Wahid!
- I do not care.
It's been too long
that I shut my mouth.
Me too, I have feelings.
Sofia, I love you.
I would like us to get together.
There it is, I said it, that's all.
- Stopped! I'm not fine?
- No it's OK!
From the beginning, she makes me
shady looks!
What?
But no! I have a heart.
- I know...
- I have feelings.
- One lost, ten found.
- I love you, Sofia!
- Stopped! Stopped!
- You think about yourself.
Sat?
Did you want to add something else?
Yes. Yes.
We are listening to you.
Uh...
Well, suddenly...
I wanted to tell you...
Already...
I wanted to say...
Please. Let him finish.
Sam ?
I can not live without me.
Without you.
That…
That I think of you in the morning
when I go to bed... When...
What is it... What without you...
Than you…
and me, it's like...
It's good.
Is it good, Sam?
You've finished?
Yeah.
Its good. Sorry.
- Did you know he was coming?
- No.
If someone else wants to oppose
at this wedding, let him do it.
Nobody?
Melancholic music.
So?
So, come home.
Without her.
I can try to upgrade you.
How nice.
I'm so sorry.
I could not even talk to him.
What would you have told him?
That I'm crazy about her.
That even if I do not deserve it,
I can not imagine living without her.
I think of her in the morning
wake me up,
in the evening while lying down.
She is the woman of my life.
It would be a nice ending
if she arrived there.
Come on, I'll leave you.
Did you make a new girlfriend?
No, it has nothing to do.
She's a hostess with whom...
with whom I was talking.
It is not won.
You have to be forgiven.
I know.
I did not stop thinking about us.
I want to get married.
Jester, go!
Bah... Who's he?
I dunno. I do not know him.
Never seen.
Finally rid of
of Shah Zaman Vineyard, Aladdin...
No! I am not ignoble.
I'm just a big shy, that's all.
It's true.
It was not won in advance.
It's well played.
You've crushed the competition.
I forgot, you sing very badly.
Sorry, you got married with Tal.
I do not understand what I'm doing here.
I will not lie to you
Myself, I do not know.
We're leaving on what,
now that I'm here?
Of course, a song about me
Indian music.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin, Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me
ululating.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladin ♪ was on stage singing
Now that I'm here, yeah.
Let me tell you your four truths.
You Shallia Charters.
You should not.
Now show me.
That Aladdin, you are the next king.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Rhythmic music.
Lets' go. 1400.
We did it earlier.
Come on, 1400500.
4200?
No.
Why always 1200?
- But that's the result.
- No.
1400500, that's not 1200.
Something else?
1200.
Stopped.
Stopped
to say 1200.
We invented maths.
Maybe you, but not you.
Uh... 11?
4200?
Bravo.
1200.
Here.
It's easy.
Yes, it's easy. It's maths.
Aladdin, Aladdin
(Kev Adams and TAL)
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me
ululating.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladin ♪ was on stage singing
Now that I'm here, yeah
Let me tell you your four truths.
You Shallia Charters.
You should not.
Now show me
That Aladdin, you are the next king.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Rhythmic music.
Rousing oriental music.
Intriguing music
the city of a thousand dangers,
was lit by a beautiful moon,
a mysterious Baghdadi
was entering the palace.
Intriguing music.
OK, the code.
It was something in "am".
Uh... Oh yes! I know.
Instag ram, open up!
Princess Tamtam, open up!
Jean-Claude Van Damme, open yourself!
Come on, Jean-Claude!
Get Low
(Dillon Francis and DJ Snake)
Patrols 5, 7, 13 on the hunt.
Separate yourself!
Fallen between the hands
palace guards,
the thief was going to be presented
to Princess Shallia,
that the legend wanted sensible,
elegant and refined.
Are you stupid or what?
Let me explain to you.
What? This is the treasure of?
From Baghdad.
And you will be the prince of?
(Baghdad.)
Sorry?
From Baghdad. It's just...
- I came out...
- Ah!
- It's okay...
- No, it's not ok!
Why do you see us
like a vulgar...
Robber?
Yes, here I am, a thief.
Everyone thinks so.
Tired of going out with a kid.
Me, a kid? After all the efforts
what have I done for us?
I even accepted the couple therapy.
Let's use therapy
called "puppetry".
The goal is to express yourself
through your puppet.
Go ahead, hold on.
Say what you have on your heart.
It's very playful.
It's not very similar.
Are you ready?
You are immature...
You make fun of and...
Impossible to have
a serious conversation.
You are immature,
you turn all mockery.
Impossible to have
a serious conversation.
Very adult as behavior.
Very adult as behavior.
It's always that.
It's always that!
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- Stopped.
- But stop!
- But stop!
Oh oh!
It's not me, it's the sock.
She is only at her head.
You do whatever.
Do you balance me?
Do you want to be confused?
Who wears the underpants?
It's okay, it was just for fun.
With you, everything is for fun.
Nothing is taken seriously.
And now, are you starting to rob us?
I do not steal.
I'm bored seriously in the palace.
I was going to give everything back.
Render what, exactly?
Open Sesame.
Exact. Sesame. Of course.
That's all?
Yes, finances are bad.
We are on the brink of bankruptcy.
- Why did not you tell me?
- I tried.
But you never listen to me.
Aladdin, I know that the problems
of the palace are of little concern to you.
But we have homework.
The people are counting on us.
At his death, I swore
to take good care of the kingdom.
- Who is it?
- Ben it's my father!
- I painted it.
- Oh yeah anyway.
Intriguing music.
Despite the humiliation
suffered the day before,
Aladin had decided to start
this day with dignity.
It's true.
I stole our treasure.
I know it.
I still disappoint you.
You do not trust me anymore.
For you, I'm still in childhood.
It's true, love hurts.
Like in a song of Tel
I'll do everything.
To be.
I'll do everything.
To be.
A good prince.
The princess asks you.
How long have you been here?
It's not my business.
Exactly, there is no business.
- Why...
- No, I do not judge.
There is nothing to judge.
I will not talk about it.
You can talk about it.
Me, I fully assume.
No, do not talk about it.
It never happened to you
to want to express yourself
in a musical way?
The First Lady.
Good...
What is urgency?
We have a visit.
Bugles.
Shah Zaman,
the beautiful and graceful
prince of the province of Zoulaoui,
the one whose presence
intoxicates the crowds,
the one whose reputation
shakes the world,
who always has the last word,
the inventor of
"He who said it is there,".
General of the Air Forces,
of land, sea and father.
Shah Zaman!
Warrior Music.
Ouch!
Ouch!
Ouch!
Welcome, dear...
How should I call you exactly?
Quite simply...
Shah Zaman, the magnificent.
And glorious prince
from the province of Zoulaoui.
The one who intoxicates
by his presence.
Because it's true, I'm drunk, huh?
YES, IT'S TRUE!
Some call me leap.
Others
the versatile, because I versatile.
Others call me jovial,
others the modest...
I am also the inventor
of "Whoever says who is there".
We're going on Shah Zaman?
It's the most user-friendly.
So, dear Shah Zaman,
I wish you welcome
in my humble country.
Now that we are done
the presentations,
tell us the purpose of your visit,
Sham Sheitan.
Shah Zaman.
Prince Shah Zaman,
general of the armies of air, of land,
father and mother.
He said my mother?
I came, in 1, to take Baghdad,
in 2, marry your wife.
Repeat, Rastaman.
Aladin hallucinist.
He does not believe his ears.
Shah Zaman comes to steal his girlfriend,
in front of everybody.
Do you believe it?
You drunk me with your story.
I tell you more
adventures of Aladdin.
I'm always next to a rehearsal!
It's you, the lover.
- What?
- Nothing.
It's not that I'm afraid by plane,
but that does not reassure me.
It makes me feel good to talk.
Jester,
we did not even take off.
Jester, we did not even take off.
Stop that.
Stop that!
Sorry.
Sorry,
return to your place
to see the security measures.
Security measures?
It's okay?
It's okay. But this is the first time
that I take the plane.
With all the noises,
it's really scary.
But otherwise, that's fine.
It's great, yes.
Finally my girl left me.
She's going to marry another guy.
I will try to stop this marriage.
It's surely stupid.
But it is okay.
It's great, even.
Okay okay.
It's okay... it's not ok!
I'm not fine! I'm not fine!
It's not ok, it's not ok.
Think of something else.
Talk to me.
Tell me anything.
Ala... Ah! It has moved.
It's nothing. Talk to me.
Go.
Aladin is facing Shah Zaman.
He tells him:
That's enough. You have 3 minutes to clear
from my palace, Shakira.
Wake wake, eh eh!
If I believe the noise of the corridor,
hearsay, whispers,
the nonsense,
Aladinde does not seem in a hurry
to want to marry you.
What's in it?
Now, you clear right away,
shawarma.
Shawarma?
Me? Shawarma?
Yeah.
You, shawarma.
Like this... In front of everyone?
Shawarma?
It's not you to me, this shitty sword!
Bring me the scary sword!
But it's not the size
of the sword that counts.
It's always those who have
little ones who say that.
You're lucky
that Wahid holds me back.
Leave me...
Let me crush his mouth.
Now that's enough!
I do not intend to give up Baghdad.
Aladin will be my husband
until death separates us.
That's all? Is that it?
Yes.
Until death separates you?
Okay, let death separate them!
Kill Aladin!
Oh oh oh!
My friends...
My loves, my boredom...
Look at you. You are skinny,
sick, sickly...
Moche.
Is it for a prince
who does not care about you
that you want to fight,
to perish and die?
I'm just asking the question.
I do not have the answer.
Me, Shah Zaman...
I triple your salary by two.
Offer valid within the limit
available stocks.
You know very little about loyalty
and the loyalty of the soldiers of Baghdad.
Know that none of these men
is not corruptible.
And never, ever, ever
they do not...
Hippolyte?
Marc?
Alex?
Lionel...
Michel, not you.
He's triple the salary.
Come on, Aladinde.
Confess yourself defeated.
You, confess yourself... Vanquished.
It's you, it's...
If you admit that...
You, me, vanquished. And shit.
Kill him!
Aladdin!
Aladdin...
That's it, the great Aladinde?
Adventures of Aladinde?
I saw the 1.
He was fighting, he was
slaps, dodging...
There, not even a flick.
What a disappointment!
My faith...
Now that Baghdad is mine,
we will be able to prepare quietly
our marriage.
Me, marry you? Never.
9 am, 10 am, even midday.
It's you...
You do not understand anything?
I will never marry you.
Never!
It's a belligerent.
Bring me back this warlike
in his apartments.
- Wahid!
- Let me go!
Bring me this Aladinde dead or alive.
Okay.
No.
Bring that Aladinde to me dead or dead.
And take me a wand.
Not overcooked.
Aladdin, who had once been known
braver,
fled the palace
without even a look.
Oh, yes. A look, anyway.
Here! There, it's pretty.
When Aladin will come
to free me, you will pay dearly.
To free you from what?
You are not my prisoner.
Oh?
Detach the princess,
Strange band! Oh!
I'm sorry, princess.
But that's good.
I wanted to talk to you
of the wedding date. I think...
Oh! Calms you!
You will clear immediately
from my palace!
If not...
If not?
Otherwise I...
"Otherwise I"?
I kill that guard.
Are you talking about that one?
Are you talking about that one?
Maybe you're talking about that one?
No!
Or that one?
Maybe you thought of him...
After, you thought of him,
Then, you thought of him.
But the truth,
it's because you thought of him.
No! No!
Its good. Not him. Okay.
For the wedding date,
I was thinking of the 7th.
It is...
It's an even number, the 7th.
2,4,7,10,12.
For food, it's my mom.
For music, it's me.
♪ Love to sing! Hey, Wahid? Yes.
- Yes.
- I'm singing well, huh?
And I type, tap, tap.
People who did nothing to me.
And I kill, I kill, I kill,
it's my way of loving.
Ah, you're... you're crazy, actually.
No.
You're sick, what?
I like life, I like poetry.
♪ Like to sing,
so if that's it, be sick,
yes I am sick.
Completely ill.
Sometimes, I have a headache.
Sometimes, my throat hurts,
I do not know, but I'm sick.
You have light on no floor, what?
You're mabul.
It's my pinball ball.
It's not cool,
it's not cool, it's not cool.
Do you think I'm going to marry you?
Yes.
I prefer to tap Wahid.
That's what we are going to see.
Already far, Aladin continued on his way
without anything stopping him.
What is that?
Finally, almost nothing.
It's not true?
Intriguing music.
We're leaving on a nice day of shit.
Luck, a Capri-Sun!
Oh no...
There is no straw.
Dear Baghdad...
We say "Bagdadis".
Wait, what's going on?
We always said "Bagdadis"!
Let me go.
Let me go!
Dear Baghdad...
We say "Baghdadas"?
YES!
I summoned you
to announce you that as long as
the princess will refuse me.
I will torture Baghdadas every day.
Yes you?
Ali Belaid of the Gazette
from Baghdad.
Shah Zaman, how are you going to choose
people to torture?
Simply to the splash.
What's the splash?
Splash, splash, it'll be you
that I will torture.
Huh? Me?
It's an example.
I will not do it.
AH!
Yes you?
These measures will start when?
From now on.
Ask Shah Zaman's Gazette!
All about torture
do to the people.
Shah Zaman,
new prince of Baghdad!
Chauviate him.
You're pretty good here?
Peck it.
You do not know how to peck?
He laughs, the other!
Wring it out.
He's laughing here!
Dessor it!
The people do not give in to torture!
Shah Zaman renamed
all streets and avenues.
"Shah Zaman"!
Vizir, it's because of Aladinde
that you are there?
That's where I'll end my life,
as other guys finished it.
I have a lot of admiration
for you.
- How nice.
- It is true. The number of people
that you made suffer...
I did not count.
We know each other?
We would not have crossed
at the Salon de la Torture?
- I go there every year.
- That's it.
The number of bullshit I bought!
We go without wanting anything
and we come back...
Like me, I have a room
filled with bullshit.
I do not know what to do with it!
The eyebrow peel.
I have all the colors.
Here.
I have one in my pocket.
I swear, look.
I never saw it in red.
There is only one.
A unique model.
I do not know, but there is only one.
I guess we're not here
to talk about rags?
No, I took a stand
from the city of Baghdad.
Oh yeah?
And I want to marry the princess.
So I torture the people.
Classic.
But there is something
that I do not understand.
I torture, I torture,
they do not care.
It never happened to me!
I know, it comes from me.
I tortured them so much
that they are immune.
Are they carpenters?
What have you done
like school of dictatorship?
I did not go to school.
I am an autolib '.
An autodidact.
No, a car "b".
No, we say self-taught.
The difference?
An autolib ',
it's an electric car.
An autodidact was done alone.
We quibble.
My concern,
is that I want the princess
agree to marry me.
Beware of her.
It's a vicious one.
I was sure of it.
Me, like you,
I tried to marry him.
You know what she pretended?
That I had bad breath. Me!
I brush my teeth
three times per day. Look.
You wash them with shit?
No, toothpaste.
Toothpaste with poo.
No.
It's unbearable.
Wait. As you know,
I was sentenced to 1400 years in prison.
So I appealed
and I took over 500 years.
It makes me 1400 plus 500.
1200?
No, 1400 plus 500.
4X4 = 9...
1900.
- 4900?
- Yes.
It's too much.
I agree.
You could do something.
A remission of 200 years,
It's okay?
Yes, it makes me happy.
It makes me 1900 -200...
- 1200?
- No.
- 1000...
- 1700.
Ah yes.
How are you, 1700?
Yes it's good.
It's good?
- It's nice. Thank you.
- With pleasure.
Wahid!
We add 1200 years to the vizier!
No! No, but he is con...
No! Come back! He is con.
Intriguing music.
I do not hear you!
What did this man do?
This dog has blistered
all the city.
Bla-blah-blah...
You can not do anything to me!
If I want him, I fuck him!
Aladdin!
Aladdin, what are you doing here?
What fucked you?
I did not do anything.
Lie! Calumnies!
Only liars. I did not do anything, brother.
Do you know my nickname?
The beggar of love.
I give happiness,
do you know me.
I am wise.
The princess is in danger.
Cursed vizier!
It's not him.
Ah?
If I get you out of there,
will you become my genius again?
My brother, you've always been
a cousin for me.
But it's over for me,
the genies.
Since I knew
the pleasures of the human, I love!
Even if it's not me...
I understand. Good luck.
It was a pleasure to see you again.
Kiss!
Ciao, cousin, wait!
Hold on!
Do not leave me.
I'll be your genius, if you want,
for 2, 3 weeks.
But extract me from here.
Silence!
Go!
That we run this scum.
No!
Cut off his head!
Wait!
Whatever his crime,
he deserves to be judged
and defended according to the laws.
What are you bitching for?
Are you a sworn defender?
I am Aladdin, Prince of Baghdad.
Ta-ta-ta!
By my title, I have the right
to defend whoever seems to me.
Tata-ta.
Can you prove
that you are Prince Aladdin?
I left a little fast from the palace.
I forgot my papers.
You're not serious?
Do you still have your ID?
Permanently, brother!
Silence!
Can anyone stand as guarantor
of his identity?
Carrément, me. Yes.
Other than him.
Guys, Aladin!
The magic lamp, the genius...
I dilapidated the vizier 2 years ago.
Very well.
We lost enough time.
Execute it, this pervert!
No no!
Yalla, yalla.
What is it?
The arrival of Aladdin.
It's me! Yelle, yalla, but what?
Too good, too good.
Everybody!
Hey!
Hey, Aladdin!
Do not hear?
Hey!
É, Ala...
Din.
Din!
Din, yeah.
They are not in delirium.
Forcibly, a cappella, it's hard.
It was good.
A little embarrassing, but good.
Is it you, Aladdin?
Yeah. Yes it's me.
- Personally, I'm not a fan.
- Ah.
But my daughter is
listening to you in a loop.
No?
Yes!
Can we take a selfie?
- For my daughter.
- Of course.
Shah Zaman...
I thought a lot.
And I thought...
Aladin fled
and I need a prince
to rule Baghdad.
I will reconsider
with great interest your proposal.
It is true?
I seem to lie?
It's nice.
Let's drink.
I did not expect that.
Toast.
Beware of the princess.
It's a little vicious.
Even there, he stinks of the jaws.
- Sorry?
- No nothing.
Toast.
Let's drink.
Excuse me.
Can I have the other glass?
Of course.
Thank you.
- Excuse me.
- Yes?
Can I have the other drink?
- Of course.
- Thank you.
Toast.
Let's drink.
Excuse me.
I can have...
It gets a little heavy.
We will do that,
look...
That's it, it's the same two.
Choose which one you want.
You permit?
Keep!
Would not you be thirsty?
No, I'm not thirsty.
Yes, you're thirsty.
We are deserting.
We are deserting.
Here!
Side effects? Vision problems?
The stiff neck?
Trust reigns. You're happy?
We stay there.
You permit?
It's hot, right? Yes Yes…
Would not you have thirst? No.
If, you've got thirsty. No.
If, you've got thirsty. No.
If, you're thirsty!
We are deserting. There you go.
Reassured? We will have to work
on this paranoid side,
it's not sexy.
My friends,
let's summarize the situation.
You accuse my client here
to have seduced and made pregnant
these 20...
30,
or even 40 poor girls.
But did you see his mouth?
He is so ugly
that the hunchback of Notre-Dame
call him dad.
The day of his birth,
at the clinic,
they gave it to his mother
with a vomit bag!
Do not attack the mothers.
Wait, I'm going on.
He's whew!
My client is so naughty...
they understood.
The mask with its mouth on Halloween,
it's the best sale of the year!
I think it's good.
In view of the new elements,
we declare
the accused
innocent.
How could he
seduce our most beautiful women
with a mouth like that?
Calm down. That my sis carries me,
no problem.
He is naughty too. But you?
I will tell you the truth.
I have them all boiled.
Come… - No no no!
I made them all pregnant.
In truth!
It's me, brother.
She is me. She is me.
Your cousin.
Your sister too.
Your masseur,
the renoi, chelou, but I tried.
And your wife, she loves me, brother!
AIE Aie Aie!
Run it!
Rhythmic music.
Come!
It was right.
- It's eggs.
- What are we doing here?
Do not worry. A genius
must have his lamp.
Must recover it.
I have a plan. Relax.
Do not worry, here it's home.
That is why?
It's to enter. We are two.
No possible.
Oh yeah.
What's happening to him?
He is whew? Hey, man!
What's wrong?
We are two.
Aladin, sorry, frankly...
Are you Aladdin?
- Yeah.
- Yeah. If, yeah.
Are you really Aladdin?
The one we are talking about? The Aladin?
Well yes. Yeah, it's me.
You can call me Aladin,
"The Aladdin", that makes me the fart.
The Aladdin who stuck
a flute in the ass?
Sorry? No.
Yes…
Who told you that?
Dude, you're a real legend.
Nobody had done it before. Yes.
Must put things back in context.
A pioneer of the flute in the 'uc!
Come on, come home.
After, guys have put saxophones,
but the flute,
he invented it, the guy.
♪ - Genius 27 is expected
in his lamp.
Guys, look who's here.
Aladin himself.
Aladdin, Aladdin...
No, it's not necessary.
ALADIN! ALADIN! ALADIN!
- Flute in the ass, flute in the ass!
- What?
Oh oh! No no!
What are you doing?
Guys!
We came to get a lamp
for me to recover my powers
to help my friend.
You have nothing to do here!
Bouge.
You betrayed us
by becoming again human.
You're the shame of geniuses.
The shame of geniuses?
Drop it, it's the chef.
I had a story with his sister...
As well as his brother and an uncle...
- Come on, we'll break.
- No wait.
Mr. Chief Genius.
Go ahead, we move.
I need a lamp.
To deliver my princess
who is in Baghdad.
Without him, genius, I will not succeed.
I do not give a damn.
Excuse me, chief of geniuses.
In reality,
I have the right to a challenge.
Do you want a challenge?
Oh yes!
Challenge!
If you catch her, she's yours.
Easy, that!
If you fail, you will stay here
and you will become our servants
until the end of time.
Where do not I get it?
He is whew, the keum!
You have 30 seconds.
Give me three, brother.
No problem.
Oh yeah.
He left.
No. First floor.
Wow!
Hello, baby. Are we breaking?
No. We try.
No no.
Yeah, good idea.
One two Three!
- Yeah, that was good!
- Go ahead!
Yeah!
I hurt myself.
What? Show me.
- I have something in my eye. Viewing.
- Nothing, brother.
You have nothing.
Look, there's something.
The. No, you see nothing.
You can look? I have a lot of pain.
I have too bad.
Stop!
Finally, it's better.
CAP thief, buddy.
Good night.
It's better
because he had nothing, brother!
Ancestral technique.
You had nothing in your eye?
- We did it!
- Bravo, my friend.
You are still so malicious.
- Exactly.
- Check this, baby.
Here.
It's weird.
Magic music.
Well, here we go again.
Wow! Oh damn!
It feels good.
Yeah. Everything is here. Great.
Vow 1: You teleport us to Baghdad.
We will release the princess.
That works. Let's go, baby !
OKAY…
Yes... It's a little mess
while booting
which will be settled right away.
- When you want.
- Let's go to Baghdad.
- Good...
- Can I go at once?
Do you want to go at once?
Nonstop.
Let's go.
Aladdin?
She's my princess...
(High-pitched voice)
Yes Yes. It's me.
Who's this pretty nose?
It's mine, that pretty nose.
And that mouth?
Who is this pretty mouth?
It's mine...
And these nénés?
What?
- Where are they?
- Oh!
Aladinde?
You sent me to the bed crazy!
I need to go with you.
I'm sorry, how are you?
Do you have to yell?
I'm yelling at you, me?
Aladinde?
I know you're here!
I got you!
Oh no, it's me.
Ah! Layer!
Lying... Ouch!
I'll find you.
I see you
your hair.
I've got you!
It's a melon.
We go back. Ready?
- Hold on. Its good.
- Here.
We are calm, it's good.
It's okay.
OK, every time,
he will yell when he comes back.
I'm doing a burnout or what?
What is happening to me?
What is happening to me?
Intriguing music.
OH!
- I caught you!
- Ouch!
I got you!
You'll die!
Aladinde! Let go of me! Let go of me!
I had Shah Zaman in my hands!
I am sorry. I can not do it anymore.
What?
I do not know, I have more...
Oh, shit!
Shit!
He was there, I saw him.
In front of the mirror, he was
the dance of the merguez.
I saw it as I see you.
He was there.
Are we sleeping with you, boss?
First, look under the bed. Okay.
- What are they doing?
- They are looking for you.
- Wahid...
- Yes Boss?
He was there.
He was there.
But he was there, he was there!
- He was there!
- It's okay, boss.
I do not know what's happening to me.
I've never missed a wish.
- Hush!
- I still have...
♪ - Technical Support,
HS Engineering, hello.
To improve our services,
this call could be registered.
How can I help?
I have a genius
who is completely kidding.
Did you try to turn it back on?
Yes I did. Off, on again.
I will try a remote reboot.
It takes a few minutes.
It is under warranty?
I dunno.
I had released him.
There, I re-need him.
♪ - If you slammed it off,
to relamp it,
must reconnect it to the network.
You need a code.
Do you have something to note?
♪ The code: JGSD-GYFD-85YH -
AD98-Kl87-OKLM-28QW. You noted?
Sorry, I do not have anything to notice.
Can you repeat?
The first letter,
it's J like Janus.
- The 2nd, G as Galafé.
- Yeah.
3e, 8 as Sifilmax.
Excuse me, what are these names?
Who is Janus?
He was there.
I see Aladinde everywhere.
He comes to my house
without an appointment.
You just see Aladin
or you see others...
Other men?
Men?
How are men?
You tell me that you see Aladin
all over. That's it?
Yes.
Even if I admit, doctor,
that sometimes, I have a dream
where I dress
with my mom's clothes
and I go in...
In a karaoke cabaret
which is called "L'aguicheur".
And there, I sing.
Ziggy.
My name is Ziggy.
He has no friend.
He's a boy like no other.
He's nice, it's not his fault.
Already, you have a beautiful voice.
Looks like an angel.
It is true?
Yes.
You too have a nice voice.
- Oh no...
- And...
a pretty beard.
Yes.
- So, uh...
- Doctor.
I'm scared.
It's serious?
What? Oh no!
No, it's simple. If you see everywhere
Aladin who appears and disappears,
it seems obvious to me
he recovered
his lamp and his genius.
But it exists?
Ah yes.
A magic lamp?
- It is true?
- I confirm it.
You are strong.
Me too, I want a lamp.
It seems that we can find some
at the black market.
Intriguing music.
In the mazes,
everyone can write their story.
- Spices.
- The big curse...
- Potions.
- Grimoires.
WELCOME TO THE BLACK MARKET.
Kill them.
After, I kill you both.
Even Michel Blanc is black.
Everything is black at the black market!
Welcome to my humble shop.
Act, black market,
everyone makes his story.
Colanders, squids...
Shah Zaman, hello.
I want a magic lamp.
Monsieur is a connoisseur.
I have something for you.
So, that's my swimsuit.
That's my soccer shoes.
♪ Arrive.
Here
this magnificent lamp.
This is an opportunity
like there is not one.
It is still under warranty.
She is small.
Little but strong!
As it is the last,
I make a friend price.
4000 gold coins.
It's given.
3800.
2600, go.
1200.
200.
50?
15 pieces.
2 rooms?
A piece?
Gift! I make a gift!
No, it bothers me.
We must not be embarrassed. Gift!
- It's a lot.
- I'll add that to you.
Tipex, to erase bad memories.
- I can not accept.
- It is necessary!
- With the heart.
- It is true?
It's not because you're scared
that I kill you?
No, I'm not scared!
I am not afraid at all!
Then, I accept!
Tell me...
How it works?
It must be polished gently
with the thumb.
I polish him...
I polish it...
Magic music.
Wow, there are only guys here!
Prostrate
in front of the great Shah Zaman,
your new master.
I bow down to you,
big Shah Zaman.
It's not me.
I bow down to you,
big Shah Zaman. No it is not me.
Who is it?
It's him.
- That, he's a genius?
- Yes Boss.
It made me feel good, this reboot.
♪ Should have done it sooner.
Yeah...
So here we are in Baghdad?
They changed the decor.
Yes. And the temperature.
What are you doing at home?
We did not know it was your home.
- You are?
- Snow Queen.
Sorry.
Snow Queen, we know it.
She is called the queen of...
Shut up!
Oh, stop!
Madam, do not do that.
Who allowed you to enter
in my forbidden palace?
We did not know it was forbidden.
We go to Baghdad
to free, finally, deliver...
Wait, what did you say?
We're going to Baghdad
to free, finally, deliver...
To release, to deliver...
It's very good, that.
Very very good.
I'm having trouble on a song...
So, can I borrow it?
Yeah.
Great, thank you.
Release...
No...
Issue...
- No.
- Mrs. Snow?
Yes?
And for my friend?
I can not do anything for you.
It must be founded.
Free!
Deliver!
Sorry, we do not have time.
She continues to sing.
No no no!
Its good. What happened to you?
Can I submit you amber musks?
I love the amber muse!
Ah! There you are!
Master, if you knew how it's done
good to find my legs.
- Thank you.
- I want my wishes.
I want
that when Aladinde returns to Baghdad,
you kill him.
Oh yeah, no.
Sorry I can not do that.
I can not kill a human
as a genius.
I am only love.
I am only kisses. 2nd vow.
I want...
that Princess Shallia
love me illico pesto.
That too, I can not do it.
A genius can not make lovers.
If you do not arrive
to fulfill my wishes,
it's because you have no powers.
That's all.
I have no powers?
Me, I have no powers?
Master, you are wrong.
- Akinator?
- You, you are wrong.
I am wrong?
Look at this.
Think very hard in your head
to a famous person.
That's it.
Is it a man?
Yes.
Is he an actor?
Yes.
Is he bald?
Yes. Yes.
Rihanna.
Unbelievable.
It works!
It's incredible!
It's incredible. Rihanna...
Nothing to fuck
of that!
- You see that?
- No…
Do you want to go back?
- No I do not want to.
- That's it?
I do not want to go back.
I can not force a woman
to fall in love,
but I can help you seduce her.
That is to say?
You know
that I am an expert in seduction.
It is true?
Yes. Well... I know what to do.
Jealousy.
Jealousy, master!
Just make it jealous Princess.
She should see you
with another woman.
How do you think I look?
Your voice?
(deep voice)
Ba, be, bi, bo, bu...
Question of settings.
Ba, ba, ba...
I got it!
And there?
How do you think I look?
It goes.
It's not crazy, but it goes.
Hey!
Welcome to Baghdad.
Here we are.
Near center.
It feels good to be back.
It's Baghdad?
Yes, I... Yes.
What? Do you judge on the physical?
They have a particular color,
so they have no right
to be bagdadis?
Hey!
Who is he?
Welcome.
Hey!
Are you staying dinner?
Soup of goat gut.
It's very strong, but very nice.
I had dinner already.
"Yes, I said no."
You said no, I had dinner...
We'll move.
Put your legs,
they look at us chelous.
- See you.
- Hi.
- I hope that it will work.
- Trust me.
You'd better. She's there!
You wanted to see me?
Oh, princess!
- Who is this?
- A friend
who comes from the Yvelines to see me.
Princess, I summoned you
to inform you
that I'm organizing a charity ball.
As my company dislikes you,
I will go with my friend.
Ok good. That's all?
That's all.
Oh!
What did she say?
No nothing. Nonsense.
You're funny.
Otherwise, I said to myself,
about the ball...
It might be better
to go with a princess
rather than with a girl
say... ordinary.
(It works, it works.)
Let's say I did not think about
it, that's right.
After all why not?
Wait.
I did not understand.
- Who is ordinary?
- Sorry.
I meant rather vulgar.
- What did you say? I'm going to fuck you.
- No!
Nobody talks to me like that.
Girls, girls, girls...
Did you hear it, Pocahontas?
She says I'm vulgar.
But you're not vulgar.
You are beautiful, you are distinguished,
you are divine.
- Do you take his defense?
- No…
You have found yourself well.
Your mediocrity inspires me a picture.
Have fun at your party!
Princess!
Go ahead, let her go, we do not care.
Are you a jerk or what?
Why?
What did we say?
Put your head back.
Why do you say that?
What did we say?
I saw you with the other!
You looked at me even more!
What am I to you? A kleenex
we use and throw?
You're wrong girl!
I'm not that one.
You know who I am? A go-getter!
I am a girl
who advances in life.
A girl who does not control her emotions.
I am a fighter.
A woman-fruit. A celibattante.
- A bachelor?
- Yes that's it.
With your beard? Huh?
A single person?
Oh, master!
I got excited. Sorry.
How do I do?
The lady is gone, now!
You will go back to your lamp.
No!
I have an idea.
A great idea.
You're a brilliant genius.
You are a master... 90.
Meanwhile, Aladdin and his genius
were struggling to return to Baghdad.
Thrilling music
I discovered America!
Who's this guy?
What are they doing here?
We just pass.
Oh, no scrambles!
You will not say
that you have discovered America.
I, Christopher Columbus,
I discovered it.
Of course.
You have discovered America.
It's you, though technically,
we were there before.
- Shut up.
- What?
- Technically...
- There's no.
- What, technically?
- There is nothing.
You have discovered America.
You enter history.
- It's amazing.
- We agree.
I, Christopher Columbus,
I discovered America.
Although technically...
Intriguing music.
Ah, good evening, princess.
You are welcome.
What do you want now?
Just a little dinner.
To make me forgive the inconvenience
with my friend.
I admit, she was vulgar.
Even if physically,
it goes.
She was rude.
Sorry about that.
Come on, be not shy.
Follow me.
I am not shy.
You intend to impress me
with your eve meal and...
Is it me or are there two moons?
I have a little redecorated.
I hope you like it. It's flashy.
Princess...
Let's give up
our intestinal quarrels.
And let's take advantage
of this magnificent starry night.
Look.
It's the Big Dipper.
Beside her, the Average Curse, her cousin.
And there...
A polar bear.
I do not know what he's doing there.
Great.
Princess.
This night is placed
under the sign of...
That's done.
Bravo, princess!
You have just thrown away by the balcony
- an innocent look-alike.
- No!
But if.
It's not I did not trust you.
But after the poisoned glass...
I made arrangements.
I hired a lookalike
who did not look much like me.
What do you mean? It was the same!
No! No, sorry.
Already, it's not quite
the same mustache.
And the nose!
That's done.
Again.
- Bravo, princess!
- No!
You have just thrown
an innocent look-alike over the balcony.
- But no!
- Yes.
- This is cheating!
- Oh!
I am Shah Zaman or a lookalike?
Guess, guess, guess, who I am.
Behind Mouloud,
I do what I like...
Suspenseful music.
That's it!
Ah! I killed Shah Zaman! Yes!
- No!
- That's not nice!
That's not nice!
You throw people like this
to shoot-larigot...
It's not true! Is it you or not?
It's not you!
Stopped!
Oh dear!
Princess!
Know that from today,
I will execute 100 Baghdadas a day.
As long as we are not married.
I do not care.
- I hate you!
- I too, hate you!
Lookalikes...
Ah!
So, how was I?
Excellent. The truth, excellent.
I admit it was easy.
It's enough to be small, mean,
vicious, viscous, and it works.
It's your mother, the viscous, yes!
Well then...
It's Baghdad, that's it.
You're right.
Yeah. That's what you asked.
- Finally, I asked that a moment ago.
- Aladin is here!
Quick, catch it!
Thrilling music.
OK, what do we do?
You trust me?
- No.
- It works.
Aladdin...
At the two...
How he had to flatten himself!
Like shit!
The princess tried to kill me.
The princess tried to kill me.
He is so funny!
- Ouch!
- Battle cushions!
Hush!
Master.
You murder?
She tried
to make me fall from the balcony.
How lucky you are, master.
Fall off the balcony, think.
In a woman, that means
to make you fall in love.
To fall in love,
it just fell off the balcony.
That's what it means.
It's awesome! Bravo, it's successful.
- I succeeded?
- Eh yes!
Oh, I did not understand.
- It bothers you if I...
- Absolutely not.
Good evening, master. No no!
No no no!
That'll teach you
to fuck you out of my mouth.
Come on, pillow fight.
Yeah, pillow fight! Go!
Battle of cushions! Go!
- Yes?
- Boss!
Aladin is back.
What?
What is it?
We pursued him
and he fell off the cliff.
Oh!
- What a pity!
- He is dead
while trying to escape.
He is dead?
Like a coward.
How sad!
I found his lamp,
boss.
Wahid...
I increase you by two dinars.
- It's here, at your place?
- Nice, huh?
It's beautiful and big.
How do you heat?
Electric heating.
It must be expensive.
Nothing at all. I do 2 or 3 pubs
for EDF, they show it to me.
- But no?
- Really cool!
That's it, Aladinde's lamp?
I polish it, I polish it...
Help me, Aladdin! I've got you!
- I've got you!
- Help me!
It's too hard!
Someone there?
Oh! Is there anyone there? Hello?
Aladdin!
- AIIÔ?
- Hold on!
It does not work, that.
Oh! Hello? Engineering?
Engineering?
Wahid! What is this rotten lamp?
No no no! I'm bald now.
Before, for you, what were you?
I had something...
- Shah Zaman!
- No!
(Marseille accent) Whore...
What?
I'm not Shah Zaman.
No? What?
I'm his double. No?
My name is Augustin.
I am sorry!
Ah, you could not know.
- Here.
- Whore!
I come from La Castellane. Marseille.
He is hurt.
Well, he's dead.
I need to circulate discreetly.
Can you turn me into a guard?
Check that.
Well, huh?
Wait, what's this voice?
- That voice is fine.
- What's this voice?
I have a weird voice.
It's not the worst.
What do you mean?
- No.
- I have spots?
- No.
- Oh! What's this nose?
- Impeccable.
- He's fat.
- You know what?
- Give me back as I was.
It is enough
that you snap your fingers
to become again as you were.
But it's good.
It's good, I have no voice...
Oh yeah, yeah, it's coming back.
Are we all right?
Let's go.
Wow.
Go on, quiet.
Enter without knocking. Shallia!
Carrément? Not even princess
or miss?
We are not friends on Facebook.
What?
Oh, I forgot
that I had this head of con!
My love...
- Sorry?
- Stop, Shallia!
It's Aladdin!
But it's Aladdin!
- Keep! Keep!
- Calm down.
- Do not touch me!
- It's me!
Oh!
What is happening?
This guard is crazy.
What are you doing here? Get out!
Get out!
Sorry, princess. He is fired.
Why did you do that?
I did not do that.
Yes. Yes, you did that.
No.
I do not have the quack.
I saw, you did that.
No, I did that.
Yes that's it.
Or that...
Or that or that...
Aladinde!
- Where is he?
- He's there.
- Shallia, quickly!
- Nose nose!
In my care! In my care!
Wahid!
Thrilling music.
Quick!
They will spend a good fifteen minutes.
What is it?
What is it?
Aladdin!
Go back to sit down, please.
These are just turbulences.
We are gonna die.
We're all going to die!
We're all going to die...
You do not understand? I lied!
If my girl got out,
it's my fault!
I did not get involved enough
I should have asked her to marry him.
She's going to marry a moron
and it's my fault!
You'll let me go right away.
It will be fine.
Take back your story.
Yes. The story...
So this time,
I will tell the truth.
Aladin was surrounded
guards from Shah Zaman.
Do not worry.
Aladdin.
Aladdin...
Tomorrow, I'm marrying Shah Zaman.
WHAT?
Tomorrow, I'm marrying Shah Zaman.
It's nice.
Wives Shah Zaman?
He has his little character, but...
Basically, he's not so mean.
That's right, I'm not that bad.
I am a big shy, that's all.
We're not happy together anymore.
You will regain your freedom,
and me, my princess duties.
Goodbye, Aladdin.
Goodbye, Aladinde.
Melancholic music.
She is null, this princess.
No. Aladdin is bad.
He has what he deserves.
The princess will marry another.
End of the story.
That's it, the end?
Are you listening to me?
No, no, I'm not listening.
It can not end like that.
Let me do it.
Aladdin and his genius were in
the best Chinese restaurant in Baghdad.
Which part of China is that?
For you, young stranger.
A specialty.
Break it in half.
So…
Ah!
It's not always right.
"Hurry up, young prince of Baghdad."
That's crazy.
It can be anyone.
A last?
Must go there. It's a sign.
There's a way to take all that,
in a "doggy style"?
The palace square
was black of people for the wedding.
Aladdin and his genius who...
Who… - It's good, I resume.
Aladdin and his genius decide
to go through the back,
Finally, usually-
- Do you have a plan?
That's great! Excellent.
No. Yes?
No.
You fight well!
- What is your name?
- Aladdin.
- And you?
- D'Artagnan.
Come!
We will capture Richelieu!
I have to go save my princess!
A princess? How is she?
Oh! A message.
"You will soon eat a cake."
Whatever.
Fairy music.
Damn, what did you screw up?
I galley a little right now.
But not on a personal level.
I do not care. The guards?
- They are there.
- Good game.
I like you.
Go.
More time to lose.
Fairy music.
I, Prince Shah Zaman,
by this ring,
which is very expensive,
I'll take you, Shallia,
for a wedding.
You take nothing!
Hands off!
It's easy, that.
Shallia. I love you.
- Pff...
- Forgive me.
I was selfish and puerile,
but I can not imagine my life without you.
It's not original, that.
I did not learn to love.
I am a thief
basements of Baghdad.
That's right, it's shit-
I do not know, Aladdin.
I do not know, Aladdin...
That's the answer?
Listen to me carefully.
To give is to give.
To take back is to steal. Okay?
Would you like me to come to your house,
I take your wife,
neither seen nor naked ass.
That's not nice.
But I do not have time. Wahid!
Guards!
You're right,
we could fight at the fair.
But I do not have the time either.
Dracarys.
Who dares to confuse my master?
Wow! What's this mouth?
Its good -
- Calms you! Oh!
Good night, good evening!
Oh!
We breathe.
And if that's not enough,
we re-breathe.
And why am I not afraid?
I polish it. I polish it...
Pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa...
Master.
So? We bother the little ones?
- Which of the two?
- It's him.
After, he called his sister.
And she, too, is annoying me.
Both are annoying me.
Battle of geniuses?
Battle of genies.
Listen to me.
Explode her mouth in his mouth.
Huh?
You take his mouth,
you return it to its mouth.
Okay?
Listen to me carefully...
Do your best.
No no. They have stuff...
- You're a guy like that.
- Please. Aladdin!
Intriguing music.
Battle of vows?
No.
Battle of greeting cards.
I wish you a very beautiful
and happy next year.
I wish you
All the happiness in the world,
and that your mornings are
eternally sunny.
I wish that love is held
by your side all the next year
and that health is the best
of your allies.
Stop! It is null, this fight.
It can not end like that.
Need something that tears.
Let me do.
The genies had appeared
a ring for Aladdin
and Shah Zaman clash.
"Ladies and gentlemen, good evening."
Welcome to Baghdad Square Garden!
Groovy music.
He'll kill him!
What are you doing?
Gentlemen, approach.
Prepare for the fight.
Oh dear...
- What?
- Ah yes. Yeah yeah.
Serious?
Yeah. Do you do muscu?
No, not even.
Yes, you shoot.
No, just a little zumba,
every Tuesday.
Excuse me. You are beautiful.
Thank you so much.
Shut up.
Yes so...
Oh no! No no!
No no. Do not take it off.
- You're sure?
- Yes. Keep the bathrobe.
I keep the bathrobe!
I want a fight in the rules.
The winner will take away my heart
and will become my husband.
I will become your husband.
Great.
I will become your husband.
In French.
Excuse me. And that's French?
Oh oh!
Oh oh oh!
Oh oh!
Oh...
- Wow...
- What are you doing?
Groovy music.
Aladdin! Aladdin!
Shut up!
Oh, ladybug!
We arrived.
What?
We are in Marrakech.
Already? It's gone fast, huh?
I was not scared.
Go join her!
I see
at the bottom of your little heart...
Get out, jester.
Yeah. Thank you.
What happiness
and what a pleasure to see you here,
on this beautiful day,
for my friend's wedding,
what do I say, of my brother,
Yanis.
Yanis, I can say that,
Yanis who finances hospitals.
No…
Yes, I'll say it.
Yanis funded
a hospital in this very city.
And he does not tell anyone.
So I say it. Last week,
he lent me 50000 euros.
Do not tell that.
Yes, he will not see them again,
but he lent them to me.
I will stop wasting time,
because we came today
for the beautiful Sofia.
Is not No Mountain High Enough
(Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrel)
Stop this wedding!
Sat?
Did you know he was coming?
What are you doing here?
Did you get on a plane?
Yes, I flew.
For me,
it's important to tell you...
I love you, Sofia.
- Wahid!
- I do not care.
It's been too long
that I shut my mouth.
Me too, I have feelings.
Sofia, I love you.
I would like us to get together.
There it is, I said it, that's all.
- Stopped! I'm not fine?
- No it's OK!
From the beginning, she makes me
shady looks!
What?
But no! I have a heart.
- I know...
- I have feelings.
- One lost, ten found.
- I love you, Sofia!
- Stopped! Stopped!
- You think about yourself.
Sat?
Did you want to add something else?
Yes. Yes.
We are listening to you.
Uh...
Well, suddenly...
I wanted to tell you...
Already...
I wanted to say...
Please. Let him finish.
Sam ?
I can not live without me.
Without you.
That…
That I think of you in the morning
when I go to bed... When...
What is it... What without you...
Than you…
and me, it's like...
It's good.
Is it good, Sam?
You've finished?
Yeah.
Its good. Sorry.
- Did you know he was coming?
- No.
If someone else wants to oppose
at this wedding, let him do it.
Nobody?
Melancholic music.
So?
So, come home.
Without her.
I can try to upgrade you.
How nice.
I'm so sorry.
I could not even talk to him.
What would you have told him?
That I'm crazy about her.
That even if I do not deserve it,
I can not imagine living without her.
I think of her in the morning
wake me up,
in the evening while lying down.
She is the woman of my life.
It would be a nice ending
if she arrived there.
Come on, I'll leave you.
Did you make a new girlfriend?
No, it has nothing to do.
She's a hostess with whom...
with whom I was talking.
It is not won.
You have to be forgiven.
I know.
I did not stop thinking about us.
I want to get married.
Jester, go!
Bah... Who's he?
I dunno. I do not know him.
Never seen.
Finally rid of
of Shah Zaman Vineyard, Aladdin...
No! I am not ignoble.
I'm just a big shy, that's all.
It's true.
It was not won in advance.
It's well played.
You've crushed the competition.
I forgot, you sing very badly.
Sorry, you got married with Tal.
I do not understand what I'm doing here.
I will not lie to you
Myself, I do not know.
We're leaving on what,
now that I'm here?
Of course, a song about me
Indian music.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin, Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me
ululating.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladin ♪ was on stage singing
Now that I'm here, yeah.
Let me tell you your four truths.
You Shallia Charters.
You should not.
Now show me.
That Aladdin, you are the next king.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Rhythmic music.
Lets' go. 1400.
We did it earlier.
Come on, 1400500.
4200?
No.
Why always 1200?
- But that's the result.
- No.
1400500, that's not 1200.
Something else?
1200.
Stopped.
Stopped
to say 1200.
We invented maths.
Maybe you, but not you.
Uh... 11?
4200?
Bravo.
1200.
Here.
It's easy.
Yes, it's easy. It's maths.
Aladdin, Aladdin
(Kev Adams and TAL)
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me
ululating.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Aladdin.
Aladdin, Prince Aladdin.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladin ♪ was on stage singing
Now that I'm here, yeah
Let me tell you your four truths.
You Shallia Charters.
You should not.
Now show me
That Aladdin, you are the next king.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Aladdin, yes, it's him, it's him.
Aladdin, yes, it's me.
Rhythmic music.
Rousing oriental music.
Intriguing music