500 Days of Summer (2009) - full transcript

After it looks as if she's left his life for good this time, Tom Hansen reflects back on the just over one year that he knew Summer Finn. For Tom, it was love at first sight when she walked into the greeting card company where he worked, she the new administrative assistant. Soon, Tom knew that Summer was the woman with whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life. Although Summer did not believe in relationships or boyfriends - in her assertion, real life will always ultimately get in the way - Tom and Summer became more than just friends. Through the trials and tribulations of Tom and Summer's so-called relationship, Tom could always count on the advice of his two best friends, McKenzie and Paul. However, it is Tom's adolescent sister, Rachel, who is his voice of reason. After all is said and done, Tom is the one who ultimately has to make the choice to listen or not.

## [Whistling]

[Pencil Scribbling Rapidly]

## [Whistling Continues]

[Man Narrating]
This is a story of boy meets girl.

The boy, Tom Hansen
of Margate, New Jersey,

grew up believing that
he'd never truly be happy...

until the day he met "the one."

This belief stemmed from early exposure
to sad British pop music...

and a total misreading
of the movie The Graduate.

[Dustin Hoffman On TV]
Elaine! Elaine!

[Narrator] The girl, Summer Finn
of Shinnecock 'Michigan'

did not share this belief.

Since the disintegration
of her parents 'marriage'

she'd only loved two things.

The first was her long dark hair.

The second was how easily
she could cut it off...

and feel nothing.

Tom meets Summer on January 8.

He knows almost immediately
she's who he's been searching for.

This is a story of boy meets girl.

But you should know up front,

this is not a love story.

# They made a statue of us #

# And put it on a mountaintop #

# Now tourists come and stare at us #

# Blow bubbles with their gum #

# Take photographs of fun #

# Have fun #

# They'll name a city after us #

# And later say it's all our fault #

# Then they'll give us a talking to #

# 'Cause they've got years of experience #

## [Vocalizing]

# Living in a den of thieves #

# Rummaging for answers in the pages #

## [Vocalizing]

# Living in a den of thieves #

# And it's contagious #

# And it's contagious ##

## [Vocalizing]


We didn't know
who else to call.

It's Amanda Heller
all over again.

You did the right thing.

Now, where is he?

[Plate Shatters]


What are you doing here?

- I'm here to help you.
- Help me how?

First, put down the plate.

Drink this.

- What is that?
- Vodka.

Um, does Mom know
that you're here?

- 'Cause it's probably past 10:00.
- [Sighs] Don't worry about it.

Just start from the beginning
and tell us what happened.

[Tom Narrating]
Things were going so well.

Then what?

I think we should
stop seeing each other.

- Just like that?
- Just like that.

- Did she say why?
- I mean, this thing... What are we doing?

I mean, is this normal?

Norm- I-I don't know. I don't care.
I'm happy. Aren't you happy?

- You're happy?
- You're not?

- All we do is argue.
- That is bullshit.

Maybe she was just in a bad mood.

Yeah, maybe like a- a hormonal thing.

- P.M.S.?
- What do you know about P.M.S.?

- More than you, Tom.
- Then what happened?

This can't come as
a total surprise to you.

I mean, we've been like Sid and Nancy
for months now.

Summer, Sid stabbed Nancy...
seven times with a kitchen knife.

I-I mean, we have some disagreements,
but I hardly think I'm Sid Vicious.

No. I'm Sid.

Oh, so I'm Nancy?

Let's just eat,
and we'll talk about it later.

Mmm. That is good.

I'm really glad we did this.

I love these pancakes.


Tom, don't go.
You're still my best friend!

- Jesus.
- You've broken up with girls before.


And girls have broken up
with you before.

- This is different.
- Why?

'Cause it's Summer.

So you'll-
you'll meet somebody new.

Point is, you're the best guy I know.
You'll get over her.

I think it's kind of like how they say.
There's, uh-

There's plenty of other fish in the sea.

- No.
- They- They say that.

Well, they're lying.

I don't want to get over her.

I want to get her back.

[Man] Maybe playing it safe
is the wrong approach.

The nuclear family is dead,

and we need a new holiday
that recognizes that.

May 21st.

Other Mother's Day.

Thank you.

I'd say we've got some potential here.
What do you think, Hansen?

Could you write up
some prototypes for these?

Uh, Mr. Vance, there's a telephone call
for you on line three.

Oh. Thank you.

Uh, everyone, this is Summer,
my new assistant.

Summer just moved here from-

- Michigan.
- Right. Michigan. Right.

Uh, Summer, everyone.

Everyone, Summer.
Excuse me. I have to take this.

It's nice to meet you all.

[Narrator] There's only two kinds
of people in the world.

There's women, and there's men.

Summer Finn was a woman.

Height, average. Weight, average.

Shoe size, slightly above average.

For all intents and purposes,

Summer Finn, just another girl.

Except she wasn't.

To wit, in 1998,

Summer quoted a song by the Scottish band
Belle and Sebastian...

in her high school yearbook.

"Color my life
with the chaos of trouble."

This spike in Michigan
sales of their album...

The Boy with the Arab Strap...

continues to puzzle industry analysts.

Summer's employment at the Daily Freeze
during her sophomore year...

coincided with an inexplicable
212% increase in revenue.


Every apartment Summer rented...

was offered at an average rate
of 9.2% below market value.

And her round-trip commute to work...

averaged 18.4 double takes per day.

It was a rare quality,
this "Summer effect."

Rare, and yet something every
post adolescent male has encountered...

at least once in their lives.

For Tom Hansen to find it now
in a city of 400,000 offices,

91,000 commercial buildings
and 3.8 million people-

well, that could only
be explained by one thing:


Dude, I hear she's a bitch.


Yeah. Patel tried to talk
to her in the copy room.

She's totally not having it.

Maybe she was just in a hurry.

And maybe she's an uppity,
"better than everyone" superskank.


I know. She's pretty hot.

That sucks.
Why is it pretty girls...

think they can treat people like crap
and get away with it?

Centuries of reinforcement.

[Scoffs] You know what? Screw her.
I don't care.

If she wants to be that way, fine.

[Elevator Bell Dings]

## [Headphones Rock]

## [Continues]

[Faint] # Driving in your car #
[Elevator Whirring]

# Oh, please don't drop me home #



- I love the Smiths.
- Sorry?

I said I love the Smiths.


You have-
You have good taste in music.

- You like the Smiths?
- Yeah.

[Singing Along] # To die by your side
is such a heavenly way to die #

I love 'em.
[Elevator Bell Dings]

Holy shit.

There you go.
Have another piece.

- Ah.
- Drinks?

- Arthur, did you get a piece?
- Thanks.

- Want one?
- Yeah.

- Want one?
- Mmm.

- Summer, right?
- Oh. Yeah.

- Smiths fan.
- Yeah. Tom.

Want some, uh, uh-

It's not champagne.
I don't know what it is.


So, how's it goin'?

- Pretty good.
- You just moved here, right?

- Mm-hmm.
- When?

- Saturday.
- Oh, wow.

And, uh, what brought you?

Boredom mostly.

Wanted to try something
new and exciting.


Well, clearly you've come
to the right place.

- [Chuckles]
- [Chuckles]

So, have you worked here long?

About three or four years.

Wow. You've...

always wanted to write
greeting cards? [Chuckles]

No, I don't even
want to do it now.

Well, you should
do something else then.

Yeah. I studied to be
an architect, actually.

You did? That's cool.
What happened there?

It didn't work out.

I needed a job, and here we are.

You any good?

Well, um, I wrote this one.

"Today you're a man.

Mazel tov on your bar mitzvah."

- It's a big seller.
- I meant as an architect.


- I doubt it.
- Well,

you're a perfectly adequate
greeting card writer.

Thank you. That was actually
my nickname in college.

They called me
"Perfectly Adequate" Hansen.

They used to call me Anal Girl.

I was very neat and organized.

- Well, I should get back, so-
- Uh-

All right. See you later.

## [Whistling]

[Paper Crumples, Thuds In Trash Can]

I don't know, man.
I think it's official.

I'm in love with Summer.
I love her smile.

I love her hair. I love her knees.

I love this heart-shaped birthmark
she has on her neck.

I love the way she sometimes
licks her lips before she talks.

I love the sound of her laugh.

I love the way she looks
when she's sleeping.

## [Pop]

# She's like the wind #

I love how I hear this song every-
every time I think of her.

I love how she makes me feel.


Like anything's possible,
or like- I don't know. Like-

Like life is worth it.

This is not good.

She likes Magritte and Hopper.

And we talked about Banana fish
for like 20 minutes.

We're so compatible, it's insane.

She's- well, she's not
like I thought at all.

She's amazing.

- [Rachel] Oh, boy.
- What?

Just 'cause some cute girl likes
the same bizarro crap you do,

that doesn't make her
your soul mate, Tom.

- [Male Voice] Red team wins!
- What do you mean?

- It's off.
- What?

- Me and Summer.
- Was it ever on?

No, but it could have been,
in a world where good things happen to me.

Yeah, well, that's not
really where we live.


[Video Game Sounds]

So, what happened?

- All right. You ready?
- Yeah.

So there we are.

Nine more floors to ride,
just me and her.

Hey, Summer.


How was your weekend?

It was good.

Can you believe that shit?

I'm sorry. What shit?

I think I missed something.

She said, "It was good."
Emphasis on the "good."

She basically said she spent the weekend
having sex with some guy she met at the gym.

Skank. Whatever.
I'm over it.

What the hell is wrong with you?

She's not interested in me.

There's really nothing
I can do about that.

Just because she said it was good?

And some other things.

Like, did she say, uh,
"hey" instead of "hi"?

I mean, 'cause you know that that-
that means that she's a lesbian, right?

I gave her plenty of chances.

I'm going to the supply room.
Do you guys need anything?

I think you know what I need.

Uh, toner.

Okay. Sure. No problem.



## [Rock]
# Good times for a change #

# See, the luck I've had #
[Volume lncreases]

# Can make a good man turn bad #

# So, please, please, please #

# Let me, let me, let me #

# Let me get what I want ##
[Clicks off]

Whatever, man. It's fine.

I don't need this crap really.
I just, you know-

I'm comfortable.
I'm unhassled.

People don't realize this,
but loneliness-

- It's underrated.
- You could just ask her out.

Don't be stupid.

[Mouthing Words]

This Friday, all you can
karaoke at the Mill.


Come on.

They're not gonna let you
back in there after last time.

Ah, I wasn't that bad.

Dude, you threw up on the stage,
you tried to fight the bartender...

and you threatened to
burn the place down.

But I didn't burn the place down.

We're not going back there, man.

Look. It's not like that, okay?

It's a work thing.
The whole office is going.

- I can't go, even if I wanted-
- You're not listening to me.

- What?
- The whole office is going.


# Just like every cowboy #

# Sings a sad, sad song #

# Every rose has its thorn ##

- Hi.
- Hi.

- They said you weren't coming.
- You asked if I was-

Goddamn. That song is brilliant!

What's up, Hansen?

[Man] Summer. Summer-

- That's me.
- Come on up.


Okay. I'm new,
so no making fun of me.

[Man] Whoo!

Thanks, chief.
## [Pop]

- Ah, thanks.
- Yeah, man.


## [Continues]

# I got some troubles
but they won't last #

# I'm gonna lay right down
here in the grass #

# And pretty soon
all my troubles will pass #

# 'Cause I'm in Su-Su-Su #

# Su-Su-Su #

# Su-Su-Su-Su-Su-Su #

# Sugar Town ##


## [Continues]

## [Fades]

- Like, that's what I was-
- I guess.

- Hello. [Chuckles]
- Hi.

I didn't, uh- I didn't know
you were gonna join us.

I would have gotten you,
you know, a drink, or-

- I'm good.
- You're good?

You- You were great-
great up, uh, singing.

Thank you.

I wanted to sing "Born To Run,"
but they didn't have it.

- I love "Born To Run."
- Me too.

- Tom's from New Jersey.
- Really?

Yeah. I grew up there.
Uh, I lived there till I was 12.

I named my cat after Springsteen.

No kidding.
What-what was his name?


- Oh.
- That makes sense.


So, do you have a boyfriend?

- No.
- Why not?

- 'Cause I don't want one.
- Come on. I don't believe that.

You don't believe that a woman
could enjoy being free and independent?

[Robotic Voice]
Are you a lesbian?

No, I'm not a lesbian.

I just don't feel comfortable
being anyone's girlfriend.

I don't actually feel comfortable
being anyone's anything, you know.

I don't know what
you're talking about.



Let me break it down for you.

- Break it down.
- Okay. I like being on my own.

Relationships are messy,
and people's feelings get hurt.

Who needs it? We're young.

We live in one of the most beautiful
cities in the world.

Might as well have fun
while we can and...

save the serious stuff for later.

Holy shit. You're a dude.
She's a dude.

Okay. But wait, wait.
What happens if you fall in love?

- [Chuckles]
- What?

Well, you don't believe that, do you?

It's love.
It's not Santa Claus.

Well, what does
that word even mean?

I've been in relationships,
and I don't think I've ever seen it.

Well, maybe that's-

And most marriages end
in divorce these days.

- Like my parents.
- Okay. Mine too, but-

Me thinks the lady
doth protest too much.

The lady dothn't.

There's no such thing as love.
It's a fantasy.

Well, I think you're wrong.

Okay. Well,

what is it that
I'm missing then?

I think you know it
when you feel it.

I guess we can just
agree to disagree.


- [Slams Table]
- Okay. Who's singing next?

I nominate Young Werther here.

- I'm not nearly drunk enough to-
- Bartender.

[Summer] Whoo! Whoo!
# Outside there's a boxcar waiting #

# Outside the family stew #

# Out by the fire breathing #
[Both] Whoo! Whoo!

# Outside we wait
till our face turns blue #

# I know the nervous walking #

# I know the dirty beard ha-ha-hangs #

# Out by the boxcar waiting #

# Take me away to nowhere plains #

# There is a wait so long #

[Woman] # So long, so long #

# There is a wait so long #

# Here comes your man #

Whoo! You're good!
# Here comes your man #

# Here comes your man ##

[Summer] Is it-?
## [Vocalizes]

- It's not?
- No, that's not it. [Chuckles]

- What is that then?
- I don't know. That-

That- That's something,
but that's not it.

I know.

Ah, I used to watch it every week.

Oh. Yeah!

- It was the best show on TV.
- I know.

Knight Rider? Come on.
And the theme song is really good.

So good.

This is gonna bother me for a week.

Me too.

# And I'm proud to be an American #

# Where at least I know I'm free #

# And I'd like to entertain- ##

[Microphone Feedback]

- You were amazing.
- [Tom] I know, buddy.

You're amazing.

- This was so much fun.
- Yeah.

You guys are so much-
Wait! Wait! Hey.

- What's up?
- Not you.


- He likes you.
- Okay.

- He likes you, likes you!
- Good night, McKenzie.

Why don't you just tell her, Tom?


- You guys are the best!
- Sorry you had to see that. He's-

Happens every time we come here.
He, uh- I don't know.

Something about
that guy and singing. [Chuckles]

- Is that true?
- Yeah, yeah.

He drinks, and he sings
and just loses his shit.

No, uh, not McKenzie.

Um, the other thing.

What thing?

Do you... Iike me?


Yeah, of course I like you.

As friends?

Right. As friends.

Just as friends?

Yeah. I mean, I-I don't know.
I hadn't really thought about, um-

Yes. Why?

No reason. I just-

I think you're interesting,
and I'd like for us to be friends.

Is that all right?

Yeah. It's, um-

Yeah. You and me,
we should be friends.


Okay. Good.

Well, I'm that way, so-

- Okay. Well, good night.
- Good night.

- Hey.
- Hi.

[Machines Beeping]


So, that was fun the other night.

[Copier Whirs, Stops]


[Knocking Continues]

- You son of a bitch.
- Shh!

The same girl you've been
obsessing over for weeks now?

I've not been obsessing.

The girl you said was out of your league,
that you'd never have a chance with...

- ...in a million years. That girl.
- Paul, seriously.

- Did you bang her?
- No.

- What, hum job? Hand job?
- No.

Man, no.

No jobs. I'm still unemployed.
We- We kissed.

Level with me, man. Come on.
This is your best friend, huh?

Your best friend who tolerated you
whining about this girl for weeks on end.

- Paul-
- You were essentially stalking her!

- Paul! Shh!
- [Door Opening]

## [Stereo: Man Singing Pop]

- Hi.
- Hey.

- I'm Summer.
- Summer.

- I'm Paul.
- Hi, Paul. Nice to meet you.

Well, I gotta go.
I gotta do some, you know.

Yeah, man.

Um, pretend I was never here.

Oh, wait! Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom.
Um, if any jobs come up-

Thanks, Paul! See ya!

[Door Opens, Closes]

He's, uh, you know,
an old friend.

If you heard any of, um-

- Heard what?
- Nothing. You wanna go?

Yeah. I'm stalking.
I mean, I'm starving.

Ah, hon?

Our sink is broken.

Man, all of our sinks are broken.

What are we looking for again?

- Uh, trivets.
- How 'bout a fly gel?

No, I don't think so.

No? You don't want a fly gel?

Home sweet home.

Our place really
is lovely, isn't it?


Ooh! Idol's on.

The TV's not working.


Well, I'm famished.

Let's eat.

## [Rock]

Mmm. Smells delicious.

Oh, honey, that's because
it is delicious.

I made it myself.

Bald eagle.
Your favorite.


The sink's broken.

Well, that's okay, because...

that's why we bought a home
with two kitchens.

You're so smart.

I'll race you to the bedroom.

# Left behind #

# There goes the fear again #

# Let it go #

# There goes the fear##

## [Fades]

Darling, I don't know
how to tell you this,

but... there's a Chinese family
in our bathroom.



This is fun.

## [Whistling]
You're fun.


Hey, um,

I just wanna tell you that, um,

I'm not really looking...

for anything... serious.

Is that okay?


'Cause some people kind of freak out
when they hear that.

No, not me.

You sure?

Yeah. Like, casual, right?
Take it slow.


No pressure.


[Whispers] Can you, uh-
Can you wait one second?

[Door Opens, Closes]

Okay. Settle.
She's just a girl.

Just a girl.

She wants to keep it casual,

which is why she's
in my bed right now.

But that's casual.
That's what casual people do.

That's fine. That's great.

- Hi.
- Hi.

## [Pop]

# What I want you've got
and it might be hard to handle #

# Like the flame that burns the candle #

# The candle feeds the flame #

# Yeah, yeah
What I've got full stock #

# Of thoughts and dreams that scatter #
[Fireworks Whistle, Explode]

# You're pullin' them all together #

# And I can't explain oh, yeah #

# Well, well, you #

# Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh #

# You make my dreams come true #

# Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh #

# Ooh-ooh #
# Well, well, well, you #

# Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh #
# oh, yeah #

# You make my dreams come true #

# Ooh-ooh, you, ooh-ooh #
# Yeah, oh, yeah #

# You #

# On a night when bad dreams
become a screamer #

# When they're messin' with the dreamer #
[Crowd Cheering]

# I can laugh it in the face #

# Twist and shout my way out #

# And wrap yourself around me #

# 'Cause I ain't the way you found me #

# And I'll never be the same oh, yeah #

# Well, well, you #

# You make my dreams come true #

# Ooh-ooh, you, ooh-ooh #
# Whoa, yeah #

# Ooh-ooh #
# well, well, well, you #

# Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh #
# Whoo-whoo #

# You make my dreams come true #

# Ooh-ooh, you, ooh-ooh #

# Oh-oh-oh, yeah #
# Ooh-ooh #

# Now listen to this #

# I'm down on my daydream #

# Oh, that sleepwalk should be over by now #
[Bell Dings]

# Oh, no #

# Yeah, you #

# Yeah ##

[Bell Dings]


You know, I'm gonna- I'm gonna-
I'm gonna get Alfredo's number.

- Okay.
- And I'll- And I'll bring it to you.

- Okay.
- Okay?

Is this Solitaire?

So, did you get her back yet or what?

Working on it.

Hey, maybe you should write a book.


Well, you know, Henry Miller said
the best way to get over a woman...

is to turn her into literature.

Well, that guy had
a lot more sex than me.

[Computer Chimes]

Oh, this is it! This is it!

[Summer's Voice]
So great to hear from you.

I can't this week, but maybe next?

I hope this means
you're ready to be friends.

## [Summer Vocalizing
Theme From Knight Rider]

## [Continues]

Yeah, that's it. That is it.

Your girl is losing it.

[Tom] Can you just be serious,
for just a second?

- I am being totally serious.
- No, you're joking around.

- No, I am not joking around.
- "Octopus's Garden"?

Yes, "Octopus's Garden"
is the best Beatles song ever recorded.

Why don't you just say "Piggies"?

Come on. I love Ringo Starr!

- Nobody loves Ringo Starr.
- That's what I love about him.

No, no.

Ooh, this looks good.

Gets really good reviews.

[Shower Running]
[Woman Moaning]

You know what?
That looks pretty doable.

- Why are you asking me now?
- Because this was your idea.

[Summer Laughing]

- Put your hand there.
- Wait one second.


- Three, two, one!
- One.

[Summer Laughing]

Yeah, the street level
isn't so exciting, but-

Like, if you look up-
[Man] # Sweet #

# Disposition #

The Fine Arts Building.

The guys who designed this,
Walker and Eisen, are...

two of my favorites.

# Never #
Isn't that cool?

# Too soon ##

- This is my favorite spot.
- This is?

This is your favorite spot?

Right here.

How come?

Uh, I don't know.
It's kind of hard to explain, I guess.

Well, try.

Um- Well, okay.

Like, that building- that's, uh-

That's been there since 1911.

And that- that's the Continental.
That's L.A.'s first skyscraper.

It was built in 1904.

What is that?


- That's a parking lot.
- Oh!

Yeah. That's-
That's also a parking lot.

That's, um- Yeah.

There's a lot of beautiful
stuff here too though.

I don't know.

I just... wish people
would notice it more.

If it were me, then, uh-

If it were you what?

I don't know. I think
I'd... make 'em notice.

How would you make them notice?

I don't know.

There's a lot of different
stuff you could do.

Show me.

Please. I don't know anything
about architecture. [Laughing]

You want me to
draw you something?


- I don't have any paper.
- Well, use my arm.

Please, I need a tattoo.

- Well, let's see your arm.
- That's the spirit.

Well, the buildings need
to be integrated better, so-

You could maximize
light capacity here.

It's kind of messy.

That's okay.

[Sets Keys Down]

[Narrator] For Tom Hansen, this was the
night where everything changed.

That wall Summer
so often hid behind-

the wall of distance,
of space, of casual-

that wall was slowly coming down.

For here was Tom, in her world,

a place few had been invited
to see with their own eyes.

And here was Summer,
wanting him there.

Him, no one else.

Have you ever been in a tornado?


[Chuckling] It's that
and my teeth falling out.

- I have that too!
- You do?

Yeah! It's so weird.
It's like being an old man.

What else do you have?

Um, earthquakes?

- Really?
- No.


[Summer] You know, I dream
sometimes about flying.

It starts out like I'm running
really, really fast.

I'm, like, superhuman.

And the terrain starts to get
really rocky and steep.

And then I'm running so fast that my feet
aren't even touching the ground.

And I'm floating,
and it's like this amazing, amazing realness.

I'm free. I'm safe.

Then I realize,

I'm completely alone.

And then I wake up.

As he listened, Tom began to realize...

that these weren't stories
routinely told.

These were stories one had to earn.
[Continues, Faint]

He could feel the wall coming down.

He wondered if anyone else
had made it this far.

which is why the next six words
changed everything.

I've never told anybody that before.

I guess I'm not just anybody.

- [Video Game Beeping]
- So what are you exactly?

- I don't know.
- Are you her boyfriend?

- It's not that simple.
- Sure, it is.

- What, like, are we going steady?
- Come on, guys.

You know, we're- we're adults.
We know how we feel.

We don't need
to put labels on it.

I mean, "boyfriend," "girlfriend."

All that stuff is-
it's really juvenile.

- You sound gay.
- You really do.

Okay, first of all,

your last girlfriend was Amy Sussman
in the seventh grade,

and you dated for, like, three hours.

And you, you've been with Robyn
since what, like 1998?

- '97.
- '97. See.

[Video Game Beeps, Ending Theme Plays]

I don't think the two of you are exactly
authorities on modern relationships.

- So, what should I do?
- You should ask her.

- [Sighs]
- What?

Well, why rock the boat,
is what I'm thinking.

I mean, things are going well.

You start putting labels on it,
that's like the kiss of death.

- It's like saying, "l love you."
- Yeah, I know what you mean.

That's what happened
between me and Sean.

- Who the hell's Sean?
- My boyfriend before Mark.

Who the-? Never mind.

So, what you're saying-

I'm saying you do want to ask her.

It's obvious.

You're just afraid you'll get
an answer you don't want,

which will shatter all the illusions of
how great these past few months have been.

Now look, if it were me,

I'd find out now before you
show up at her place...

and, well, she's in bed
with Lars from Norway.

Who's Lars from Norway?

Just some guy
she met at the gym...

with Brad Pitt's face and Jesus' abs.

[Whistle Blows]
Wait! No, Coach. We're not done here.

- Rachel!
- Look, it's easy, Tom.

Just don't be a pussy.

## [Acoustic Guitar]

## [Woman Singing In French]

You okay?

- Yeah.
- You sure?

Summer, I gotta ask you something.

- What?
- What are we, um-

- What are we doing?
- I thought we were going to the movies.

Yeah. Nah. I mean, like,
what are we, like-

What's going on here, with us?

I don't know.

Who cares?

I'm happy.

- Aren't you happy?
- Yeah.


## [Continues]

## [Vocalizing Along To Song]

## [Continues]

## [Ends]

London, 1964.

Those girls knew how to dress.

Nowadays, it's all
these giant sunglasses...

and tattoos.

It's handbags with
little dogs in them.

- Who okayed this?
- Some people like it.

I like how you dress.

I was thinking about getting a
butterfly tattoo about yea big on my ankle.




How's it going?

Uh, okay.

You live around here?

Um, yeah, not too far.

I've never seen you here before.

You're not too observant.

That's funny. You're funny.

- So let me buy you a drink.
- No, thank you.

- You with this guy?
- Hey, I'm Tom.


So, come on. One drink.
What are you drinking?

I said no, thanks.

You're serious? This guy?

- Hey, buddy...
- You know what? Don't be rude.

I'm flattered,
but I'm not interested.

So why don't you go over there
and leave us alone? Thanks.

It's a free country.

I can't believe
this is your boyfriend.

What are you doing?

[Glass Clattering]

It was really just a crazy thing.

It happened like-
It felt like it happened fast, but really,

it-it also felt like it
was happening really slowly,

like everything all was just-

I don't know. It doesn't feel like
you think it would- [Slams Drawer]

Hey, what's the matter?

I just- I can't believe you.

You can't believe me?

You were so completely,
completely uncool in there.

Wait. Are you mad at me?
I just got my ass kicked for you.

Oh, really? Was that for me?
Was that for my benefit?

Yes, it was.

Okay, well, next time don't,
'cause I don't need your help.

You know what?
I'm really tired.

Can we talk about this tomorrow?

[Siren Wailing In Distance]


No. You know what?

I'm not going anywhere
till you tell me what's going on.

Nothing's going on.

We're just-

What? We're just what?

- We're just friends.
- No! Don't pull that with me!

Don't even try to-

This is not how you treat your friend.

Kissing in the copy room?
Holding hands in IKEA?

Shower sex? Come on!
Friends, my balls!

I like you, Tom.
I just don't want a relationship-

Well, you're not the only one
that gets a say in this!

I do too! And I say we're
a couple, goddamn it!

[Opens Door, Slams]

After you, please.


[Thunder Rumbling]

[Doorbell Buzzes]


I shouldn't have done that.

- Done what?
- Gotten mad at you.

I'm sorry.

[Exhales] Look, we don't have to
put a label on it.

That's fine. I get it.

But, you know, I just-
I need some consistency.

I know.

I need to know that you're not
gonna wake up in the morning...

and... feel differently.

And I can't give you that.

Nobody can.

## [Whistling]

[Sighs, Hisses]

That hurt? I'm sorry.

No, it doesn't hurt.

I like you.

All right.

# You loved her, you were kissing #

Shh. Well, what about you?

Did you ever even have a boyfriend?

- Well, of course.
- Yeah?

- Yeah.
- Well, tell me about them.

- No.
- Oh? Why not?

Because it's not important.

I'm interested.


All right. Fine.
You want to go there?

- Yeah. I can take it.
- Fine.


Well, in high school
there was Markus.

- Quarterback-slash-homecoming king?
- [Whistle Blows]

No. He was a rower.

He was very hot.


For a brief time in college
there was, um- there was Charlie.

She was nice, but-

And then there was
my semester in Sienna.

Fernando Belardelli.

Also known as "The Puma."

- The Puma?
- Yeah, The Puma, 'cause, you know.


- Oh, that's it?
- The ones that lasted, yeah.

What happened? Why-
Why didn't they work out?

What always happens. Life.


That's the dumbest thing
I've ever heard.

No, it's not.
It's awesome. Trust me.

I'm serious.

I'll go first.



- Penis!
- Penis!

- Penis!
- There's kids around.

There are no kids around.

- Penis!
- Penis!

- You having fun?
- Yeah.

This is the kind of thing
you did with The Puma, isn't it?

Oh, we rarely left the room.


Sorry. Tourette's.

- You know how it is.
- Penis!

- She has it too. Penis!
- Penis!

- Shh. Everyone's looking over here.
- I'm done. I'm done.

- Are you done?
- I'm done.

- You're done?
- Yeah.

This is too much.
Unleash me. I'm done.

- Promise?
- I promise.

I promise.



- It's very complex.
- Mmm.

In a way, it sort of, like,

says... so much...


saying so little.

- Do you want to go to the movies?
- Yep.

[No Audible Dialogue]

[Film: Man Speaking French]

[French Continues]

[Man Speaking Swedish]

[Man Speaking Swedish]
So much suffering.

- Suffering.
- Suffering.

[Man Speaking Swedish Continues]

[Speaks French]


## [Orchestra: Dramatic]


Mr. Vance would like to
see you in his office.


Have a seat.


Has something happened
to you recently?

What do you mean?

A death in the family,
someone taken ill, anything like that.


Look, I don't mean to pry, but...

does this have something to do
with Summer leaving?

- Who?
- My assistant.

- Your. um-
- Tom, everyone knows.

Never mind.

The reason I'm asking is,
lately your work performance...

has been... a little off.

- I'm not following.
- Okay.

Um, here's something
that you wrote last week.

Uh, "Roses are red,
violets are blue.

Fuck you, whore."

Now, most shoppers
at Valentine's Day-

- Mr. Vance, are you firing me?
- No. No.

Relax, Hansen.
You're one of the good ones.

Okay. Uh, yeah, I'm sorry.

Things have been a little difficult.

That's okay.
I completely understand that.

I'm just saying that perhaps you could
channel those energies,

um, into something like this.

Funerals and sympathy.

Misery, sadness, loss of faith,

no reason to live.

This is perfect for you.

- Uh...
- Good. Okay.

Now back to work you go.

Thank you.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Don't you have, like,
20 cards to write by Friday?

Nope. All done.

Really? Can you help me?

'Cause I've run out of
ways to say "congrats."

Okay. I got "Good job,"
"Well done" and "Way to go."

That's it.

How 'bout,
"Every day you make me proud,

but today you get a card."

- Shit, that's good!
- I know.

Have you tried "Merry"?

Wow! That's perfect! Merry!

We've been stuck on this for an hour.

Hmm. How about...

"I love us"?


I hate Summer.

I hate her crooked teeth.

I hate her 1960s haircut.

I hate her knobby knees.

And I hate her cockroach-shaped
splotch on her neck.

I hate the way she smacks her lips
before she talks.

And I hate the way she sounds
when she laughs.

# She's like the wind #

I hate this song!

Son, you're gonna have
to exit the vehicle.

I normally don't do blind dates,

but Paul and Robyn spoke
very highly of you.


They said you write greeting cards.

That's so interesting.
I wanted to write.

I actually majored
in English in college,

but what are you gonna do
with that degree?

I went to Brown.
Where did you go?



Listen, it's great to meet you,

and... you're a very attractive girl.

I just wanted to say up front
that this isn't-

- It's not gonna go anywhere.
- Oh.

I liked this girl.
I mean, I loved her.

What does she do?

She took a giant shit on my face.

- Literally.
- Literally?

Not literally.
That's disgusting. Jesus.

What's the matter with you?

The point is,

I'm messed up. I am.

You know, on the one hand,
I want to forget her.

On the other hand,

I know that she's the only person in the
entire universe that will make me happy.

- Mm-hmm.
- You ever do this?

You think back on the times
you had with someone,

replay it in your head
over and over again,

and you look for those
first signs of trouble.

There's two options really.

Either... she's an evil,

emotionless, miserable human being,

or... she's a robot.

Small Wonder.
You know, Vicki.

- That would explain a lot actually.
- Can I ask you a question?


- She never cheated on you?
- No. Never.

She ever take advantage
of you in any way?


And she told you up front
that she didn't want a boyfriend.


I got a great idea.

# Well, some things
you can explain away #

# But my heartache's
in me every day #

# Did you stand by me
No, not at all #

# Di- ##

Oh, fine! Go!
That's fine. See ya.

Waste of time.
You don't look anything like Summer.

[Man On P.A.] Now departing on Track 2,
Pacific Surfliner.

Full service to Santa Barbara.

All aboard, please.

- Hey, baby.
- Hey, you here?

- Hell no.
- What do you mean, "Hell no"?

- I'm not going to that.
- Yes, you are.

No, man. It's gonna be all old people.

Yeah, but you said you were going.
That's why I'm going.

And that's why I called her last night,
told her I was sick.

Like a ninja.

Dude! I'm gonna- I'm not gonna know
anybody at this thing.

Maybe you'll mee some hot granddaughters
or something.

I'm hanging up now.
Bye, baby.

[Man On P.A.]
May I have your attention, please?

Passengers boarding the train
in Los Angeles, please...

have your tickets out
and ready for collection.

[Continues, lndistinct]

Hi, Tom!

Hey, Summer.

- I must have walked right by you.
- Yeah.

Well, um, what are you doing?
Are you going to Millie's?

- Me too.
- Cool.

I forgot you knew her.

Yeah, we worked together
all that time, so...

- of course.
- I love Millie. She's the sweetest.

She is.

- How are you?
- I'm good.

Good. I-I wrote to you.
I never heard back, but-

Yeah. Yeah. Sorry about that.
I-I just, you know-

It got kind of crazy,
and the holidays came up, so work was-

You still working for Vance?


Well, I was gonna go get a coffee
if you wanna-

"The Architecture of Happiness."

- Yeah.
- That looks like a good book.

Yeah. it's-
[Clears Throat]

- Well, I don't want to bother you.
- No, no. I, um-

Yeah, let's get coffee.

After you.

[Man] # Sweet #
[No Audible Dialogue]

# Disposition #

# Never #

# Too soon #

# A moment, a love
A dream aloud #

# A kiss, a cry
Our rights, our wrongs #

- You look nice.
- Thanks.

So do you.
# Sweet #

# Disposition ##



I now pronounce you
husband and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

# Helping the kids out of their coats #

# Wait, the babies haven't been born #

# Oh, oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh #

# Unpacking the bags and setting up #

# And planting lilacs and buttercups #

[Summer] Okay. What else you got?
## [Continues, Faint]

- Well, you snore.
- No, I don't.

- You do.
- No, I don't.

- Yeah.
- Well, you do too.

- Oh, I definitely do.
- And your feet reek.

- That one time!
- No, every time.

- That one time!
- [Chuckling] No.

That one time especially,
but every time.

And when you wake up,
your hair, it sticks up like that.

- It's ridiculous.
- You're ridiculous.

Your favorite Beatle is Ringo.

Damn right!

- Ringo's the best.
- Ringo is-

- Goose!
- Oh! oh! oh!

Man! He's fast.
Damn! All right.

You got me. Duck.


# At last #

# My love has come along #

# My lonely days are over #

One, two, three.

# And life is like a song #

- Wanna dance?
- Yeah.


# Oh, at last #

# The skies above are blue #
Hey, I was wondering, um-

I was gonna maybe have
a party on Friday, um,

on our rooftop that has,
like, a really nice garden,

if you want to come.

# For you are mine #

If you're not busy.

# At last #
I don't think I will be.


- They're good, huh?
- They are good.

## [Ends]

I guess I just got lucky.

Um, we met in elementary school.

In seventh grade
we had the same class schedule,

and, uh,

we just clicked, you know?


Shit, I don't know.

As long as she's cute
and she's willing, right?

I'm flexible on the cute, so-

Twenty-one years.

She's the light that guides me home.

Yes, that is from one of our cards.

No. Someone else wrote it.

Doesn't make it less true.

I think technically
the "girl of my dreams"...

would probably have, like,
a really bodacious rack, you know.

Maybe different hair.

Probably- You know, she'd probably be
a little more into sports.

But, um, truthfully,

Robyn's- Robyn's better
than the girl of my dreams.

She's real.

# He never, ever saw it coming at all #

# Never, ever saw it coming at all #

Tom walked to her apartment,

intoxicated by
the promise of the evening.

# It's all right It's all right #
He believed that this time...

his expectations
would align with reality.

# It's all right #

# Hey, open wide
Here comes original sin #

- Hi.
- Hey.

# Hey, open wide, here comes original sin #
You look nice.

Yeah. Thanks.

- I like your tie. Wow!
- Hi.

- How you doing?
- Good. How are you?

# It's all right It's all right #

# It's all right
It's all right, it's all right #

# It's all right #

# No one's got it all #
I, um, brought you something.

# No one's got it all #
That's so nice.

# No one's got it all #
Thank you.

You shouldn't have.

That's so nice. It's the-

- Thank you so much.
- No problem.

- I'm excited to read it.
- Yeah.

Come on.

# And we're going to these meetings #

- So, Tom, what is it that you do?
- Uh, I write greeting cards.

Tom could be a really great architect
if he wanted to be.

That's unusual.

I mean, what made you go
from one to the other?

I guess I just figured,

why make something disposable,
like a building,

when you can make something
that lasts forever, like a greeting card?


# It's all right
It's all right #

# It's all right, it's all right #

# It's all right #

# No one's got it all #
Do you guys know each other?

# No one's got it all #

# Power to the people
We don't want it #

# we want pleasure
And the TVs try to rape us #

# And I guess that they're succeeding #

# And we're going to these meetings #

# But we're not doing any meeting #

# And we're trying to be faithful #

# But we're cheating
cheating, cheating #

# I'm the hero of the story
Don't need to be saved #

# It's all right #

# It's all right
It's all right, it's all right #

# It's all right
It's all right #

# It's all right
It's all right, it's all right #

# It's all right
It's all right #

# No one's got it all #

# All, all #

# All, all ##

[Alarm Buzzing]

## [Rock]

# Hung up and bent on a stranger #

# Just trying to swing a full-time ride #

# I never knew the cold hand of danger #

# Till I met this one and took it inside #

# Now I can't get near it #

Get a room! Really.
# Don't want to hear it #

# My cover's blown #

# I walked in the rain like a drone #

# All the way to Marquette #

[Alarm Buzzing]

# The infinite pet #

# Oh, no #

# No, no, no, no, no #

# Cheaper than all your threats #

# No, no ##

I've been calling you every five minutes.
Are you okay?

- I'm great.
- What happened to you?

- I don't wanna talk about it.
- You always wanna talk about it.

- Not this.
- Okay. Well, come on. Let's go.

- Where are we going?
- It's Thursday!

This one says, "Go for it!"

And this one says,
"You can do it!"

We have a whole line
of inspirational photographic cards...

featuring Pickles, my cat.

I think people will really enjoy them.

- Thank you.
- [Vance] Good job, Rhoda.

That's inspirational stuff.

Okay. Who's next?

We haven't heard from
Sympathy in a while.

- Hansen?
- Yeah?

The Winter Collection?
Do you have anything to contribute?

Uh, no.

I really don't.

[Clears Throat]

We'll come back to you.
Uh, McKenzie?

- Actually, you know what?
- Yes, Tom?

- Can I say something about the cat?
- Well, okay.

Yeah, uh, this is-

And, Rhoda, no disrespect here,

but, um, this is total shit.

- Tom!
- "Go for it" and "You can do it"?

That's not inspirational.
That's suicidal.

If Pickles goes for it right there,
that's a dead cat.

These are lies. We're liars.

Think about it.
Why do people buy these things?

It's not 'cause they want
to say how they feel.

People buy cards 'cause they can't say
how they feel, or they're afraid to.

We provide the service
that lets them off the hook.

You know what?

I say, to hell with it!
Let's level with America.

At least let them speak
for themselves! Right?

I mean, look! What- what is this?
What does it say?

"Congratulations on your new baby."

How 'bout,
"Congratulations on your new baby.

Guess that's it for hanging out.
Nice knowing you."

Sit down, Hansen.

How 'bout this one, with all
the pretty hearts on the front?

I know where this is going. Yep!

"Happy Valentine's Day,
sweetheart. I love you."

That sweet? Ain't love grand?

This is exactly
what I'm talking about.

What does that even mean, "love"?

Do you know? Do you? Anybody?


If somebody gave me this card,
Mr. Vance, I would eat it.

It's- It's these cards
and the movies, and the pop songs-

They're to blame for all the lies...

and the heartache, everything.

And we're responsible.
I'm responsible.

I think we do a bad thing here.

People should be able to say
how they feel, how they really feel,

not, you know, some words that
some strangers put in their mouths.

Words like "love"...

that don't mean anything.

Sorry. I'm sorry. I, uh-

I quit. I'm-

There's enough bullshit
in the world without my help.

[Elevator Bell Dings]

All right. Next we do running drills.

Hey, you're sketching again.

Yeah, well, just doodling.

Okay, Tom. we got 20 seconds.
Talk to me. You okay?

Yeah, I'm good. I'm great.

You know, my friends
are all in love with you.

You know, it's like we said.

- Plenty of other fish in the sea.
- Thanks.

But, uh, those are guppies.


- Hey, Tom?
- Mmm.

Look, I know you think
that she was the one,

but I don't.

Now, I think you're just
remembering the good stuff.

Next time you look back, I, uh-

I really think
you should look again.

## [Acoustic Guitar: "Bookends"]

- It's playing at 5:00.
- Do you wanna see it?

Um, I don't know.
We could just go back to your place or-

No, I really want to see it.
Let's go.

## ["Bookends" Continues]

# Time it was and what a time it was #

# It was #

# A time of innocence #

# A time of confidences #

- You okay?
- Yeah.

What- what is it?
The movie?

It's nothing. I'm just-
I'm just being stupid.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

# Preserve your memories
They're all that's left you ##

It pains me we live in a world...

where nobody's heard of Spearmint.

- I've never heard of them.
- I put 'em on that mix I made you.

They're track one.

Oh, yeah.

[Bells Jingling]

So, what do you wanna do?

I think I'm just gonna
call it a day.

You don't wanna get some dinner?
Are you hungry?

You all right?

- I'm just tired.
- Okay.

I got it. Pancakes!

## [Ends]

## [Rhythmic Banging]

## [Banging Continues]

## [Rock]

[Man] # Oh, girl, I don't know
all the reasons why #

# I found the answer
looking in your eye #

# I go out walking all day long #

# Take away this lonely man
Soon he will be gone #

# 'Cause I'll tell you everything #

# About living free #

# Yes, I can see you, girl #

# Can you see me #

# You don't need to know
what I do all day #

# It's as much as I know
watch it waste away #

# 'Cause I'll tell you everything #

# About living free #

# Yes, I can see you, girl #

# Can you see me #

# 'Cause I'll tell you everything #

# About being free ##

Hey, Tom.

I thought I might see you here.

I always loved this place,
ever since you brought me.

So I, uh-

I guess I should say

Only if you mean it.

Ah. Well, in that case-

So, are you okay?

I will be, eventually.

- You wanna-
- Hmm.

[Sirens In Distance]

- I like your suit.
- Ah, thanks.

- You look sharp.
- [Laughs]

- So do you.
- [Chuckles] Thanks.

- I quit the office.
- You did?

I didn't know. That's great!

And you, um-

you're married.

Yeah. It's crazy, huh?

You should have told me
when we were at the-

I know.

You know, at the wedding
when we were dancing.

- Well, he hadn't asked me yet.
- But he was in your life.

- Yeah.
- So why'd you dance with me?

'Cause I wanted to.

You just do what you want,
don't you?

You never wanted to be
anybody's girlfriend,

and now you're somebody's wife.

Surprised me too.

I don't think I'll ever
understand that.

I mean,
it doesn't make sense.

It just happened.

Right, but that's what
I don't understand.

What just happened?

I just- I just woke up one day,
and I knew.

Knew what?

What I was never sure of with you.

You know what sucks?

Realizing that everything you believe in
is complete and utter bullshit.

- It sucks.
- What do you mean?

Uh, you know, destiny,
and soul mates, and true love,

and all that childhood
fairy tale nonsense.

You were right.
I-I should have listened to you.


Yeah. What?
What are you smiling at?

- Tom.
- What?

What are you looking at me
like that for?

Well, you know,

I guess it's 'cause...

I was sitting in a deli
and reading Dorian Gray

and... a guy comes up to me...

and asked me about it,

and... now he's my husband.

Yeah. And... so?

So, what if I'd gone to the movies?

What if I had gone
somewhere else for lunch?

What if I'd gotten there
10 minutes later?

It was-

It was meant to be.

And I just kept thinking,

- Tom was right.
- No.

Yeah, I did.

I did.

It just wasn't me
that you were right about.

I should go.

But I'm really happy to see
that you're doing well.

## [Whistling]


I really do hope
that you're happy.

[Narrator] Most days of the year
are unremarkable.

They begin and they end...

with no lasting memories
made in between.

Most days have no impact...

on the course of a life.

May 23 was a Wednesday.

- Are you interviewing?
- Sorry?

Are you interviewing
for the position?

- Oh, yeah. Why? Are you?
- Yeah.


My competition.

It would appear.

Yeah. So, a little awkward.


Well, I hope you, um,
don't get the job.

Well, I hope you
don't get the job.

- [Laughs]
- [Laughs]

Have I seen you before?

Me? I don't think so.

Do you ever go
to Angelus Plaza?

Yes. That's, like,
my favorite spot in the city.

Yeah. Okay. Except for
the parking lots, but-

- Yeah. I-I agree.
- Yeah, yeah.

- I think I've seen you there.
- Really?

- Yeah.
- I haven't seen you.

You must not have been looking.

If Tom had learned anything,

it was that you can't ascribe
great cosmic significance...

to a simple earthly event.

That's all anything ever is.

Nothing more than coincidence.

- [Man] Tom Hansen.
- Yeah.

- Come on back.
- Thank you.

Tom had finally learned
there are no miracles.

There's no such thing as fate.

Nothing is meant to be.

He knew. He was sure of it now.

- Tom was-
- Sorry. Um-

I just left, uh-
Can I- one second.

He was pretty sure.

- Hey.
- You again.

Yeah. I, uh, was just wondering...

if maybe after this, if, um, you-

you want to get some coffee
or something.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sort of supposed to
meet someone after this.



- What's that?
- [Laughs] Why not?

Okay. Well, then I'll just, uh-
I'll wait for you-

We- We'll figure it out.
We'll figure it out.

- My name's Tom.
- Nice to meet you. I'm Autumn.

[Man] # She's got you high
and you don't even know yet #

# She's got you high
and you don't even know yet #

# The sun's in the sky
It's warming up your bare legs #

# And you can't deny
you're looking for the sunset #

# She's got you high
and you don't even know yet #

# It's the search for the time
before it leaves without you #

# Have you lost your mind
or has she taken all of yours too #

# What's this about
I figured love would shine through #

# We've lost romance. This world,
its turns will see you through #

# Open your mind
Believe it's gonna come true #

# Keep romance alive
and hope she's gonna tell you #

# What's this about
I figured love would shine through #

# We've lost romance. This world,
its turns will see you through #

# Open your mind
Believe it's gonna come true #

# Keep romance alive
and hope she's gonna tell you #

# She's got you high
and you don't even know yet #

# The sun's in the sky
It makes for happy endings #

# You can't deny
you want a happy ending #

# What's this about
I figured love would shine through #

# We've lost romance. This world,
its turns will see you through #

# Open your mind
Believe it's gonna come true #

# Keep romance alive
and hope she's gonna tell you #

# She's got you high #

# What's this about
I figured love would shine through #

# We've lost romance. This world,
its turns will see you through #

# Open your mind
Believe it's gonna come true #

# Keep romance alive
and hope she's gonna tell you #

# What's this about
I figured love would shine through #

# We've lost romance. This world,
its turns will see you through #

# Open your mind
Believe it's gonna come true #

# Keep romance alive
and hope she's gonna tell you #

# She's got you high ##