1313: UFO Invasion (2012) - full transcript

Hey guys!

Guys!

Guys!

Guys!

Guys!

Hello!

Any body home!

Guys!

Hey guys!

Guys seriously this
isn't funny!

Guys!



Hello!

Are we playing hide and seek?

Where are you guys at
seriously!

Marco!

Guys!

Where m I?

What are you going to do to
me?

Yeah, Just got here. Na the
place looks totally amazing.

Yep, Clean, air conditioned
and relaxing...Ya I told you

it would be great...

Ok Look, I'm going to meet the
real estate lady and give her

the check, So let me call
you back. All right by?

Ya. A guy could definitely get
some work done in a

place like this.



It gets better and better.

It just gets better and
better.

Like what you see?

Sorry... I didn't expect
you...

Um... Are you...

Evelyn.

Yes. We exchanged E-Mails.

We did.

Sorry for staring. I dont see
many people around here.

Its alright. We all space
out sometimes. Right?

We do.

So, Im guessing you don't
get a lot of

people renting this place,

No.

I don't know why! New Mexico
is just so beautiful though.

Its in the middle of nowhere.
The desert.

Not a lot of pedestrian
traffic.

Yaa, This house is great.

It is. Maybe I could show you
around? See if you any...

questions.

Let's start with the upstairs.

I hope your friends like the
bedrooms.

Are you kidding? We're all
grad students...

We're used to sleeping on
floors and couches.

Where is it you go to
university?

Colorado. Well Denver.

Wow,You're a long way from
home.

Ya its more of a working,
studying kind of vacation.

What are you studying?

Ohh.. Im sorry em i asking too
many questions.

It just gets a little...
lonely out here some times.

Oh, no, I'm sorry. I'm
studying. Biocultural

Anthropology... Theoretical
Biocultural Anthropology.

That sounds mysterious.

No not really. It's just the
research of two cultures and

how they affect each other.
Especially when a more

technologically advanced
culture begins to research and

collect data. On a more
primitive one..

Kinda like how the Pilgrims
did with the Indians.

What's theoretical about that?

Umm, I'm also interested in
how a

culture might research us.

Us?

Human beings. It's also known
as Xenoanthropology..

The study of alien cultures.

Aliens? How fascinating.

Really?See i usually have to
dance around the whole little

green men/ Ufo idea. Its not
some thing that they like

giving out PhD's for.

Because it's so far fetched?

Something like that. And I may
sound like a

crazy person . I Guess..

I don't think it sound crazy
at all.

See i love hearing that.
That's why I chose this place.

I'm taking a side trip to
Roswell tomorrow.

Really?

Im hoping something is there I
can use for my dissertation..

and just something that will
make me sound less like a

crazy person.

There's a place near by you
should check

out called Corona?

Corona?

It's where the actual
'Roswell' UFO

crash took place.

Ok... I didn't know that.

Thanks..

It's not my favorite place.
There's not much there.

Should we check out the pool.

Not a fan of the sun, huh?

No.

Yeah, me either. I burn like
crazy.

The spa and pool should be in
great working order.

I did have a man come out to
service them.

Great I probably won't be
using them much, but

I'm sure my friends will.

So, that's the place.
I hope you like it.

Ya t's perfect.

There's something I didn't
mention in our correspondence,

however.

What's that?

I use the last spare room
upstairs as something of

office. I didn't mention it
in the listing.

Im sure you can understand
why.

The owners don't mind?

Oh the owners are never
here...

Or are almost never here.

What, They trave or?

I hope you don't mind if I do
a little work here during

the week. I promise, you will
never know I'm here.

It's not a problem at all.
Im sure my friends won't mind.

Well then t hat concludes our
business.

The check...?

Oh, Sorry..

And if i where you I would
recommend the spoils of war.

The what?

Claim the master bedroom.

Thank you.

Willie, George... How was the
trip?

Man It sucked. Had to listen
to this guy's tunes the whole

time. He's a stiff.

I had to listen to Willie
bitch about my tunes the

entire trip.

You know what what ever I'm
just glad you're here.

How did i do?

You said this place has
internet access, right?

Uhh, Ya As far as I know.

Geez man listen to Grandpa
over here,

already thinking about work.
Yo man two things

how's the pool ? And where's
the beer at?

Pools good!

ya awesome..
I need a dip so lets go...

Ohhh come on you two?

They'll be plenty of time to
study and write your papers

and pretend any of it matters.
I need a dip now... let's go!

Wow, You finally did something
right for once..

been in yet?

Naa.

I'll go change.

Oh, hell no don't be a wimp
man ill get in right

now lets go!

Yoo, Man how'd you find this
place?

You know it was the Weirdest
thing, I put my email up on

a few vacation rental boards
and Wam... Evelyn found me.

Who's Evelyn?

Yeah... about that...

Oh, Great here's comes the
catch.

I told you for this price
there'd be a catch.

Nah its just she uses the
last room upstairs as an

office. And she's a little
odd...

Is she's here?

As far as i know.

Is she hot?

Kinda... In a MILF-y kind of
way.

Nice thats the kind of
catch that Daddy like.

I'm heading to my room.
I got work to do.

Yaa.. Of course you do.

Find my own room?

Ya you have plenty of choices.

Yaa I gotta change too.

I'm headed to Roswell.
Research.

Ya all work and no play, Adam.

We'll have plenty of time for
that later.. Do me a favor

and tell the others about
Evelyn when they get here?

Yeah sure..

Yo hey which room is she
staying in?

Last room, second floor..

Cool i'll be taking the room
next door.

Feeling kinda lucky..

What are you doing?

Shh, I'm trying to working my
mojo.

What ever i'm heading off to
Roswell. I'll be back

this afternoon. Dana should be
here soon,

Max and Jack in a few hours.

Hey,Hey, Thanks for putting
this together.

Ya, Ya no worries i'm just
glad it worked out.

Evelyn?

New Mexico is a state strongly
imbued with a history

of culture clashes. Multiple
Native American tribes shared

and warred over the lands for
thousands of years

The arrival of Coronado
brought Spanish occupation.

Mexico ceded from Spain,
claiming the land as its own.

Over the ensuing years,
both France and the

Republic of Texas would claim
portions of it. And finally,

the United States would
exercise its control of the

area by buying the land,
fighting its own wars and

ultimately eradicating and
relocating many of

the original Native
populations.

With all of this history,
would it then be so out of

line to assume that the most
alien of cultures might also

come here to explore,
research and stake its own

claim for dominance?

Hello? Anyone body home?

Then I claim this land for me.

Hello...?

Hey, Willie-boy.

Yo, Dana man, do yourself a
favor, take a load off

and jump into the....
..or don't listen to me.

So what's the haps?

Adam's out on some research
field trip,George is up in his

term paper so you know we
won't even see him for the

rest of the week. And oh
yeah, there's some mysterious

MILF who may or may not
be here doing... Something.

Is there beer?

That's all I needed to know.
Be a good boy and grab me one.

Evelyn? Want a beer?

Roswell, New Mexico. In 1947
an alien spacecraft was

reported to have crash landed
in the region and the alien

occupants taken away by the
military in an incident they

later reported was the crash
of a weather balloon.

The conspiracy theories
continue to this day, leading

the town's very name
to conjure images of alien

contact more than any city in
America. And over the years,

the town has been happy to
cash in on the notoriety.

Guess who is here you all...

Adam i usually get a
reaction out of that..

Here buddy!

Hiding from me huh!

I know you didn't get that
drunk last night!

Where the girls at?

You hidding!

Adam, Adam, Adam, Adam...

got to tell you though this
place is pretty nice

But has the most random
stuff here though..

Where is this fool!

Adam is right here..
Nope..

Hhmmm..

Nobody,, Huhhh

Huhhh

Get my work out on..

You know Its time for some
ladys.. Sexy ladys..

{Singing}

Alright..

He's probably watching me
right now..

Ohhh Yaa..

Ohhh Yaa..

Burning the muscle..

Oh Yaaa..

That doesn't feel like that
much to me right now.

Hahha Gotch ya...

Not sure if you think this is
funny man...

But I ain't laughing..

Yo Adam..Where you at fool!

Playing hide and seek is kinda
ridiculous..

Nope ..

Alright dude.

Thats i nice view out there.

Lets see if this fools out
here!

Adam come on man!
Where you at!

Ok guys..

This is not funny!

Come on guys!

You know i don't like being
strapped.

Guys..

Ouchh...

Come on guys!

Adam!

Adam!

Come on!

This is not cool!

Adam!

Hello!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

Adam!

What is this?

Adam!

Adam!

What are you trying to
do to me?

Is this some kind of joke?

What is this?

Adam !

Adam !

Terrestrial explorers and
anthropologists throughout the

ages have several things in
common, at least the ones we

we can qualify as successful.
Unlike the ones found in

movies, they don't come in,
guns blazing, anarchy and

pillaging their only goal.
They instead arrive

peacefully, doing their best
to learn about this new

society; to fit in as
best they can. They engage

learning and assessing and
doing their best to understand

a given culture and its
people. I believe the same

could be said for extra-
terrestrial explorers.

Hello?

I just spoke to Willie on the
phone. He and Dana and George

are here somewhere.

No, we're not?

Willie-boy, how's it going?

Whats man... Look at this
place,How do you

think its going ?

Ya no kidding. Adam did
something right.

Finally!!

So what's the catch?

Hey don't be such a hater.
Besides, I asked

about that already. The only
thing we got to worry about

is some mystery MILF around
here. I haven't been able to

find her yet but.
Otherwise, Man go nuts.

I'm gonna take a nap.

Where's Dana?

OHH, He's In the gym man...
Yeah, There's a gym.

Nice.

Ohh hey also I recommend
getting in the pool

now. If you don't, you're
a douche.

Well, we don't want that.

See ya in a little bit?

Fair enough.

Hey,, Max has arrived.

Evelyn... You in there. You
know most of the guys are here

and I'd hate for you
to accidentally see any of us

naked... Or anything.

There's no towels here.

So. That's what the sun's for.
Take a load off.

I should get some work done.
I have two research papers

to write. That's why we're
here isn't it?

Yeah, Yeah. There's plenty
of time to be productive.

Creativity takes patience,
it takes time for the cake to

rise.

What the hell are you talking
about? You're a finance major.

Yeah, and I like cake,
now just drip-dry and

stop interrupting my chi..

Im sorry didn't mean to
startle you.

No... it's fine.

I'm Evelyn. your friends might
have told you I might be

working around here for a bit.

Yeah. No problem. Nice place.

Yes, It is. I'm glad your
friend found me.

It's meant to be.

It's safe to assume an alien
culture visiting Earth has

technology far outpacing ours.
And if they can make it to our

planet, wouldn't they also
explore the myriad other

planets capable of
sustaining life?

So, my hypothesis is this:
Alien explorers would best be

served by covert intelligence
gathering. Living among us,

studying us, gathering
samples; basic anthropological

study.

They would no doubt build data
for a report that would be

used to help ascertain what
their leaders should do next.

And what are the possibilities
for Earth's survival? Given

the human species own track
record for treating indigenous

peoples, I don't think it will
be pretty.

Yo man what happened?

It's Max. I just took a nap
and when I came back I found

him like this.

Max,come on man! Max!

His breathing and pulse seem
to be fine.

Did he fall down and hit his
head, maybe?

Max! It looks like a
puncture wound!

How the hell do you
know that?

I watch a lot of Law & Order.

Look,This is out of my league.
I need you to go in and call

an ambulance.Max! Shit!

It's inside me...

Max! Yo Man, what's inside
you? Talk to me Max. Max!

Don't go in there...

What.. Jack!

Jack! Dana! George!

Where are you! All!

Jack!!

What the hell Jack!

Jack, Hey stay with me man..
Hey, Who did this to you?--

--I did it to Willie. And now
I'm going to do it to you.

Oh it's your friend -- Adam.
I look forward to hearing what

he found in Roswell.

Why are you doing this?
What happened to my friends?

Where did they go?

So full of questions. It's
something I admire about you,

Even in the face of your
own extinction.

What are you talking about?

I've already said too much.
But i want you to know you

where sacrifice and the
sacrifice of your friends has

done so much to aid our cause;
scientifically, potential

technological advances,
natural resources. You have

so much to offer us.

You're crazy you know that.

I'm a scientist. And frankly,
i cant wait to get out of this

ridiculous 'costume' and off
this terrible outpost,Ohh im

so sorry. That really was
unbecoming of my station.

Why's he like that? What did
you do to him? Jack! Jack!

Wake up man!

Stop shouting. Your friend is
done. I've already extracted

what I needed from him and
already administered the

sleeping agent.

What are you talking about?
What does that mean? What's

going on?
Where are my friends?

I really don't like to discuss
it with subjects, as it tends

to make them a tencey bit
over-anxious. But since you're

such an inquisitive one,
I'll tell you.

My form allows me remarkable
trust. I simply ask for the

help of a strong young
man for help.

They can never says 'no.'

Sometimes it's easier to just
incapacitate a subject,

particularly if the
examination is more

physical in nature.

I mostly require various
samples of brain tissue,

sentient- electrical data and
the like. It's a primarily

painless process.

Your friends are all dead or
dying of course. A by-product

of the research, but not
unappreciated. Now do you

have any other questions?

So lets begin shall we?

Guys this isn't funny?

Hello!

...Please let this be a
joke..

A really bad joke...

Adam. Hello!!

Where are my friends?

How was Roswell? Find
everything you needed?

Are they pulling some kind of
prank or some thing.

Oh there around. I think they
said something about

beer. That's must be it. Come
inside, Tell me about it.

Im very interested about it..
But its very bright out today.

Come tell me..

Could you help me? There's a
box of files I'd like to put

in my closet up in room.
But It's too heavy for me.

Ya sure.. Ok...

You know.. Where are
my friends?

Oh, Adam. You are usually much
less difficult than this.

Ouchhh... What are you doing?

I'm trying to reveres your
treatment. And it would have

worked allot better if you
wouldn't have pulled away..

Before I could fully inject
you...

Adam. Please.

What did you do to me?

You have work to do 'Adam.'
We have work to do.

What are you...

This should be our final round
of gathering data. Then we can

go home. We don't belong here,
'Adam.' You know this. We

have work to do.

No... I'm human... I'm...
No...

You just need to rest.
Then you'll remember..

Are you still 'Adam?' I gave
you enough TrixelMethulose

to be able to reverse the
persona by now. Your other

persona's were much
less difficult..

Who am I?

You are exactly the thing you
are so fascinated by. You've

bin manta personas. You've
been a pilot, a mailman, a

government agent, a
veterinarian... and now

a student. All have bin very
very helpful in obtaining

samples. and verbose other
useful data...

Where are my... Those...
Other men?

They've sacrificed themselves
for the greater good. But

don't worry I've harvested
great portions of their brain

matter, And managed to save
most of there intellectual

pursuits for study at
later time.

They're dead?

You know as well as I do, even
our technology can only keep a

partially functioning human
alive for so long. And Their

bodies are terably frail. We
have work to do...

Yes. A job...

Infiltrate...
Gather... Report...

Yes, Yes...You the real you,
is coming back?

The real me...

Yes, Perhaps a booster, Just
to be sure..

I know who I am...

Good. Then this should
sort you out.

Why?...

...I know who I am...