Uri and Ella (2016–…): Season 1, Episode 9 - Smoking Oreos and Frying Themselves in Butter - full transcript

♪ Honey, you're awesome
Honey, you're beautiful ♪

- ♪ Honey, you're...♪
- Hello?

-Vered! Hey, it's Ella.
-Ella! Are you back in Israel?

It's Uri's Ella. How are you?

Oh, honey! I couldn't hear you.

So what's up? Say, do you think
you could come over later?

-What do you mean?
-Come spend some time with us.

I can come, but... Is everything okay?
Did something happen?

No, it's just that I won't
be home all week.

-How come?
-I'm going to this workshop at Rimon.

-The music school.

So are you in school now?
That's great!

I'm not actually in school,
it's more like a workshop,

of tests.

That's great. Good luck.

Did you know that Ziv
completed his internship?

That's great.

We finally have a doctor in the family.

Good for him. That's awesome, really.

And Anat, that girl is just gorgeous,
it's unbelievable.

Busy with her wedding all the time,
even though we're planning a very...

-So will you come? Yes?
-For a week?

I... Yes.
Is he okay? Is he sick?

No, he's fine, you'll see
when you get there, okay?

Don't say another word, I get it.

Great. So go ahead and call him,
and say hi to everyone.

I'll tell them when I see them.

They're all so busy,
each with their own stuff.

-You know... Bye.


Hello? Ella?


What's up?

Wild Horses by The Stones.
Mazi Star's version.


-It went terrible.


- Hi.
- Ella? Hi.

Yes, hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

There's no need to ask you
why you're here.

What do you have for us today?

I'll be singing Part Girl, Part Woman
by Dafna Armoni.


May I have some water, please?

Okay, yes.

Thanks. Sorry.

- That's too bad.

Well, it has been done before.


Shmick, your voice is smaller,
it's more...

You don't have Dafna Armoni's range.

Fine, Dad, but they asked us
to show a wide range.

-Why didn't you ask for my advice?
-Because I'm not talking to you!

But I could have helped you.

You can't just show up
with a blast from the '80s.

That's not helping, Dad.

Helping would be to call
Shem Tov or Yehuda

or whoever it is you know over there
and tell them to accept me.

-You mean pulling strings?

You know what? Yes, pulling strings.

Because that was the opposite
of pulling strings.

Once they heard I was your daughter,
I couldn't to their expectations.

Stop that, Lul. It's pathetic.

-Hi, Avri.

-Should I tell them to turn the heat on?
-Yes, thank you.

- Are you sure it's okay?
- It's fine.

Sorry, I didn't realize you'd be staying
so I didn't set anything up.

-Am I bothering you?
-No, it's fine.

-So good. Good.
-I just didn't...

-Wait, don't leave it open.
-No, here. I've got it.

Everything's fine, Uri. It's okay.

-Wait a minute.
-I'm fine!

-Hold on, I'll give you a hand.
-No, I've got it.

I just... I'm really happy...

you're here.

I'll go load the dishwasher.

That's not necessary.
Magdalena will be here tomorrow.

And until then?
Living like this is unpleasant.

That's what she says, too.

At least I think so.
I can't really understand what she says.

That's really not necessary.

Oh, wow.

-Do you any need help with anything?
-No, thanks.

-Is everything alright with you?
-And how are you doing, Uri?

I'm great.

That's nice.


Have you heard
of the 100 Things Challenge?

Is that a reality show?

-Not even close.
-I don't watch those.

But it's not that.
It has nothing to do with it.

It's a new movement of flowing with...

Living a simple life.

A simple life, trust me,
we've made it all so complicated...

It has nothing to do with that.

You pick out 100 items
you love the most,

-and you cleanse your life of the rest.
-That sounds like a great idea.

a hundred items that you just live,
"be more with less."

That's very powerful.
That's a lot, I don't see a problem.

That's the thing, it's not that much.

Udi and I are going through the house,

and we're already
at around 200-250 items.

And he's a hoarder and I tell him,

"Let's just pay property tax
for a storage unit,

who needs VHS tapes nowadays?"

-Who even owns a VHS player?
-We do, four of them.

Would you like us to do it?
It has very strict rules, you see?


They're important to know.
Underwear for instance.

You don't count them individually,
they count as one item.

-The same goes for dishes, spoons.

-Dishes are all one item.
-One item.

-That's even easier.
-It's not that easy.

-Let's start going through them.
-Most of the stuff here is yours anyway.

Uri, let's try, we'll go through them,

-and see where it takes us.

- Hello?
- Hello, is this Ella?


I'm Miriam, I'm the
administration manager at Rimon.

Oh. Hi.

I'm calling to let you know that we've
reconsidered your application,

and decided to accept it after all.

-What do you mean?
-The orientation meeting is tomorrow.

-What do you mean by "orientation"?
-An orientation meeting, tomorrow.

-No, I mean, is tomorrow...?

Everyone's first day?

Yes, what don't you understand?

Are you sure?
-Yes, Ella.

Please be here tomorrow at 10:00 a.m.
at the Fitzgerald Hall.

-And prepare a song.

Okay. That's great.

So wait, I'll take care of the whole
tuition thing tomorrow, too?

Yes. You have until
the end of the month to do that.


Okay, so... thanks.
I mean, I'm really happy that...

Alright, see you. Goodbye.

It'll also take me to new places
with my music.

There's so much you could write
about the sea, water reserves,

-toilet tanks.
-Uri, these are the stickers.

The blue is for items you're keeping

and the red is for those
you're throwing out, okay?


Could we start at the studio
and then come back here?

Why not?

- Blue for what we're throwing out.
- Keeping.

Oh, okay. Let's see.

- It's hard, isn't it?
- It's not hard.

-It's hard.
-Let's do it chronologically.

Remember this one?

I had it in my room for months
until you started playing it.

What a lousy guitar.
No matter what I played on it,

it always felt like it had to end
with Olé! Even Hendrix.

The funniest thing is that they
bought your first guitar for me.

Have you ever thought about that?


I mean, every now and then.

I remember Dad saying it was
the third best guitar in the store.


I think we later found out that this is
a carpet manufacturing company.

You've never mentioned that.

My show features an entire bit
about carpets.

No, that the guitar was mine.

You seem to remember.

I mean in articles, interviews,
a little bit in your shows. Nothing.

What do you want, Vered?
You never even practiced on it.

How could I? You took it, Uri.

So let's fix this. We'll put
a red sticker on it and get rid of it.

You can't get rid of it, it's mine.

So I don't get it. Do you want it?

I told you I'm already
at 250 items, didn't I?

Alright, okay.
We don't have to decide right now.

Let's go to Ella's room
and come back?

-She's moved out anyway.
-Alright, why not?

It suddenly hit me, Tammy stored

salt and pepper together somewhere,
it might narrow down our list.

You like that narrowing down thing, huh?

Yes, I do.

-Guys, you're...
-For you, guys.

-No, I want to put it over there.

I'll bring it right back later. Okay?

-There's tons more.

Everything is gluten free, guys.
Go crazy.

We were on...

I don't get it, is that a C part?

I hope you're not lactose intolerant.

I just want to...

That's it.


Is there a bookcase in here?

I have no idea,
I'm just taking showers all day long.

Egyptian cotton, that's the way to go.

I think it's great
that you moved out.

Of course.

Would you like me to hear it?

Uri, why did you put a red sticker
on this? This is brand new.

-Do you want it?
-No, I don't need it.

It's brand new.

-I don't know, it's not...
-It's a bread maker.

You put the ingredients in here,
you get up in the morning

and the entire house is filled
with the smell of fresh bread.

-That's nice.
-It's a terrible smell. Horrible.

-But if you like it, it's great.
-Take it.

-I don't know, maybe Anat would want it.
-Great, give it to her.

Everything is so expensive nowadays.

-She started cooking. She's great at it.

That's nice.

It's all because of her boyfriend.
Her fiancé. Look at that.

I haven't gotten used to it yet.
She's getting married this July.

-Her daughter is getting married.
-What a guy.

-Thank you.

-Weddings are exciting.
-He's a great guy.

-I couldn't pray for anyone better.
-That's great.

Really. He's in the business.

In the business?
Is he a clothes salesman?

-What business?
-He's a musician.

-A musician? A songwriter?

So he definitely needs a bread maker.

Uri, he's doing very well right now,
just so you'd know.

That's a very tough business.
I didn't know.

It's tough, and he's making it
big time, okay?

He has a car single
and a yogurt single coming out,

-and a single for this... gym.

Jingle, fine.
He's being played constantly.

-That's great.
-He has his own studio.

-For your information.
-He's got it all.

-You've met him, haven't you?
-Of course, I've met everyone.

-What's his name?

-Tomer. Tomer might have been my dad.

In a previous life, or your grandmother.
Why are you laughing?

-That's the Reparation logic.
-Uri, what are you trying to say?

The logic of Reparation,
if you want to go for it.

-I don't want to go for it.
-Alright, okay.

-You're not stressed out by my rambling.
-What ramblings?

Ella, for instance,
If I start rambling about the past,

it stresses her out, you just can't...
Okay, we're getting back to it.

-But you're just going with it,

and that helps me release my filters,
that's lovely.

No, there's no need to release anything.

♪ Mother ♪

♪ The lullaby you've sung
a long time ago still hunts me ♪

♪ Wherever can I go? ♪

♪ If I could, I would have forgotten
how I've come here ♪

-You know the...?
- ♪ Mother...♪

-Sorry, keep going.
-What is it?

-Keep going. It's amazing.
-Just say it. What do you want?

-Nothing, it has nothing to do with it.
-What did you want?

Nothing, I just wanted to ask
if you've heard the joke

-about Ricky Gal in the nineties.
-Oh, come on. No, I don't.

Alright, keep going.

What's the joke?

Just that Ricky Gal goes
into a studio in the '90s,

-and meets the... recording guy.
-The technician.

The technician, and she asks him,
"Where's the guitar player?"

He says, "We don't need a guitar player,
it's all sampling these days."

So she goes,
"So where's the bass player?"

So he goes, "We don't need one,
it's all done with loopers."

She asks where's the drummer
and he goes,

"We don't need one,
it's all done with drum machines."

So she goes,
"Okay, so who am I supposed to fuck?"


It's really bad,
it's a lousy, boring song.

-No, it's not. No, it's not.
-It totally is.

-Yes, it is.
-No, it's not.

It's much better than the previous one.

They're both good, but...

that one also relates
to your personal story and...

I don't know, maybe even...

You could get emotional,
maybe cry at the end.

You sing it really well.

I have to focus.

I really have to stay focused.

And thank you very much for your help
with your Ricky Gal joke,

that really gave me focus.

Did you ask me here for help?

No, I asked you here
to finish my smoked salmon!

I thought we're back together.

Baby, that was amazing.
It was absolutely amazing.

Would you like me to leave?

You choose 100 items, that's it.
You let go of everything else.

- Bye.
- Bye.

- It feels amazing, you have no idea.
- Did you do it?

Of course.

Suddenly there's room.
It looks empty at first...

You should come and see it at our place.

I will, sure.
I might do it at our place, too.

I missed it at first,
but I can't feel it anymore.

I just get rid of things.

I mean, more is less.

Let's do it.
Vered, you're interrupting.

-Three, four...

♪ On the days I was so scared
I couldn't breathe ♪

♪ In an innocent worn by the day
every morning ♪

♪ A sweet girl has stepped out
of my dream ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Disappeared on the boulevard ♪

♪ On the days I was so scared ♪

♪ An hour will be gone just like that
when the background is gray ♪

♪ Drunk
I hold on to a road sign ♪

♪ In a dark corner when I return
from the closed pub ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ I disappeared for a moment ♪

♪ I'll disappear in an hour
just like that ♪

♪ In a buttoned up dress ♪

♪ One day with him ♪

♪ On another day
I didn't ask her name ♪

♪ She disappeared on the boulevard ♪

♪ On the days I was so scared ♪

♪ And now on the second shift
you try not to remember ♪

♪ It's not good to keep trying to love ♪

♪ She will never be mine
She will never be mine ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ She disappeared on the boulevard ♪

♪ On the days I was so scared ♪

♪ Oh-ho ♪

♪ The two of us with our backs
to the sunset ♪

♪ Oh-ho ♪

♪ On another day ♪

♪ I didn't ask her name ♪

♪ She disappeared on the boulevard ♪

♪ On the days I was so scared ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ The two of us with our backs
to the sunset ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ The two of us alone in a bed ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Swallowed by the herd ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ The two of us with our backs
to the sunset ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Lying on the side of the road ♪

♪ Uh... ♪

♪ The two of us alone in a bed ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Lying on the side of the road
Lying on the side of the road ♪

♪ Lying on the side of the road! ♪

♪ On the days I was so scared ♪


That was very graceful, Uri.

Would you like
to spend the night, Jean?

-No, I'll just go.
-Thanks. You're welcome.

What can I do? I like driving at night.

Look at that, you guys
don't have any energy, huh?

-Come on.
-You're 30 years younger than me.

Look at them.

-I could go all night.
-You've worked us hard tonight.

-It was fun.
-It was great.


But there was suddenly this...
No, it's all good. Alright.

-We're a little tired, we're going home.

-Good night.
-Good night.

But I thought... Alright, fine.

We'll start at midnight next time.
You'll see, these are the best hours.

-Go to sleep, Dad.
-Don't worry, I'm just a little...

-You know, I'm a little high.
-It was very nice.

-You need some rest.
-No, of course.

-Alright, bye.
-Good night, honey. Bye.



It was really nice.
A really nice evening.

I'm going to bed. Good night.

Listen, Uri, you took it so...
The whole sticker thing.

You don't need to fuss over
the stuff in the kitchen,

they're being used
and they belong to everyone,

you don't have to lose them,
and you don't need to tag food.

-Of course.

-It was great. Good night, Uri.
-Good night.


Hi, Zohar. It's Uri.

Hey. Uri. What's up?


-Did I wake you up?
-No, I'm just...

Relaxing on the couch.
What's going on?

I'm okay.

I can't sleep, I...

I can't sleep, I'm feeling hyper.


It happens sometimes.

-How are you?

Not too bad, I think.

The last time we...

We had fun, didn't we?
I mean, it was shit, but...

It was cool until it all went south.


No, it's just...

The whole thing sort of
exploded afterwards, but...

I never got the chance to tell you
that I'm sorry for all the...

You don't need to apologize.

We... We're cool.

I have the whole house to myself,
Ella is gone.

No, I was kidding. My sister is here.

I was serious about that.

My stuff is still there, aren't they?

My first band was called Deep Fry.


-It was a wordplay on Deep Purple.
-It's bad.

Hi, it's nice to meet you. I'm Vered.

-My sister.

-Do you remember Deep Fry?
-Of course.

We played at your 20th birthday party.

Deep Fry.

Would you like some?

Not at all. What are you doing?

Fried Oreos. It's Zohar's recipe.

-What's that?
-In a pot with a blue sticker on it.

We're being very responsible,
frying heartburn pills for the morning.

I had such a nightmare, Uri.

- What is it?
- Get this.

I had this talk show,

and guess who my guest was?
Grandma Rachel.

Wow, that's a great guest.

She's sitting on this sofa,

you know, with the plastic on it,
and just destroys my talk show.

- Were Mom and Dad with us?
- No.

I still don't understand
how they let us be alone with her.

They thought she's dropped dead already,

and she's got one foot
in the grave, and...

They told us to go
and say goodbye to her.

-Suddenly she...
-Don't do that! That still scares me.

Two kids, off to say goodbye...

She was lying there.

It was nice of her to save
her last reflex just for us.

You were shaking so bad, Uri!

Me? You almost ripped my arm off.

You would have jumped
into the chandelier otherwise.

-Uri, Uri, Uri.

Don't do that.
No, no. Don't do that.

You're a sweetheart, Uri.

Can I ask you an honest question
and get an honest answer?

Totally. Go for it, Uri.

I'm thinking to myself,
"She came here...

-"Probably has a problem or something,

but I don't want to ask,
so I won't embarrass her."


"We'll put stickers on stuff, count cups
and eventually, she'll tell me..."

-But it doesn't seem like it's helping.

-Why should it help me?
-No, I... No.

I'm here because Ella asked me
to come here and help out.

Help me out? What do I need help with?

Do you think I have a problem, Uri?

Hold on, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, Vered,
I didn't mean it like that.


-I can't believe you, Uri.

-You know what? No...
-What did she say?

See, Zohar? Even when our parents
were dying in my house for 18 months...

-I knew this would come up.
-It was still my fault

for not heartlessly sending them
to the old folks' home, right?

-You're taking it to a place...
-What place?

-What place?
-A place of holding back.

- What is it?
- I'm sorry I'm holding you back, Uri.

-I'm sorry.

-Vered, maybe you should go to bed.
-I am going to bed.

- We're just taking this to...
- Good night, Zohar.

Focus, focus, focus...

-Lul, what's up?
-Bye. This isn't a good time.

What are you doing here?

Don't ask questions
and I won't, either. Okay?

I was just making coffee, want some?

First of all, I'm not talking to you.
And I'm starting school today.

- Ironing school?
- You're a hoot today.

-At Rimon.
-At Rimon? That's great.

-So my string pulling worked?

I'm not in the mood
for your castrating comments.

- No, I'm happy.
- Good.

Did you send Vered over here?

- Ella?

I don't want to interrupt.
You're at Rimon?

-Yes, it's amazing here.

Your dad told me he had a wonderful
conversation with the decision makers.


So as the starting player, I'm just
letting you know that I'm leaving.

Dad is fine, everything is fine.

I'll see you Friday,
I'm having everyone over for dinner.

Fifteen grand a year? Seriously?

It's outrageous.
Where's the fucking social justice?

Do they want us to start another...
we'll set the tents back up.

One hit on the IDF radio
and the investment is covered.


-What's up, guys?
-What's up?

Great, great. I'm glad I caught you,

we're opening a Facebook page
for our class.

- Whoo!
- Whoo...

You can't avoid it.
So I need your names for it.

Noa Biran. B-I-R-A-N.

Ella, double L...

-I know.

You're his daughter, aren't you?

What's up? Nice to meet you.

Your audition song was
by the String Pullers, right?

Can you be cornier?

I was just kidding.

Right, just because my dad is famous,
that means I can't be talented.

Maybe it's the other way around?
Did you think of that, genius?

Relax, honey.

No, maybe people who have talented
parents have a bigger chance

of being talented themselves
and not having to pull any strings.

As opposed to all the lame, ugly losers
who write loser online comments.

"Oh, I'm so miserable,
I work for a mobile company,

but I'd be a musician
if I had any connections..."

But you did pull strings to be here.

"But you did pull strings to be here..."
Oh, come on!

"Look at me, I'm so miserable,
I play saxophone and my thumbs hurt..."

But it's true. You weren't
at the final auditions yesterday,

and your name was added
to all the lists by hand.

"Look at me! I'm a detective!

Maybe I'll investigate
and find my willy, too...

Everyone are so miserable,
because they don't have connections,

and that's the only reason
their lives are empty...

No, there's no way I'm not a genius.

Why won't anyone recognize my talent?
Why aren't I famous?

It's just because I don't have
any friends in the industry..."

"I'm from rural Israel,
I'm miserable..."

Even though it looks that way,

"singer-songwriter" aren't the names
of two Jewish composers,

who wrote musicals in the '50s.

It's a master title in composition
and writing of songs,

just like there's a PhD in medicine.

But let's start the exercise.

Raziel Kusphan
wrote these beautiful lyrics.

The tree in my window
wears a costume of spring.

Its branches are the arms
of his excited mother.

I want you all to go outside now,
pick up an instrument,

piano, guitar, whatever,
spread around the campus,

and return with a new original melody
for these lyrics.

Go! Yes?

-Can we work in pairs?

- How's everything so far?
- So good, Vered.

So eat up, because there's lots.

I made lots, I just put it over there
so it won't get cold.

It's delicious, Vered.

- How did the potatoes turn out?
- Great. Everything's great.

- Good. So eat up.
- This reminds me of...

- That's how our mother used to cook.
- Cheers.

-I swear.

Ella. Ella. Ella.

What about your string pulling?

I've decided not to...

Not to put all my eggs in that basket.

That stinking basket.


- It's a small wedding.
- We worked together once.

- Excuse me?
- We worked together once.

Yeah? I don't remember. Where?

About two years ago.

We didn't really meet, actually,
but I'm Soundcheck.

Mm. Okay.

You gave us the green light for
the House On The Mountain melody.

-Oh, great.
-Oh, that commercial!

- How did it go?
- What did you do with it?

-Olive, Olive...
- ♪ A great olive♪

I sang that.

♪ A dick on the mountain ♪

We didn't write the lyrics,
the advertisers send those in.

♪ Give me that dick on the mountain ♪

That's not fair. What are you doing?

- Mom! Stop.
- Don't "Mom" me, I was here.

I saw them smoking those Oreos
and frying themselves in butter,

and they have no idea,
how people are spitting blood out there.

-Vered, That's unnecessary.

-Shut up. Let me speak.

Uri, did you know that Ziv
just finished seven years of school?

He doesn't play or sing,
no one's pulling any strings for him.

- A pediatrician.
- Good for him.

But if he does well on an operation,
the Artist Guild won't send him

a royalty cheque and inflate
his bank account, right?

And why is that? Because he's a doctor.

Just a nice, sweet doctor,
at a local clinic.

Good for him, I didn't...

And what did we ask for?
To enjoy Anat's wedding?

And every wedding these days,
even the small ones,

costs 300,000 Shekels.

So we're cutting down
and less is more and more is less.

- Sorry.
- And...

God forbid, we didn't mean...

And we end up having it on a Friday
at 2:00 p.m. in July,

hoping people won't
drop dead on top of one another,

and you sit here, all pleased
with yourselves, laughing at them.

"A dick on the mountain..." Why?

What for? Huh, you grand genius?
What have you ever done, Uri?

- Oh, my God!
- Get up. Tomer...

- Come on, Vered.
- We were just joking.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Like you people are such
great minds, geniuses.

- It was a misunderstanding, Vered.
- Udi.

- Where did that come from?
- Vered. There's no need for this.

Let's finish what I've made and go.

- Come on, Vered.
- Did I offend you in any way?

No, it's all good.

I don't know how it got to this.

Well, if anyone was hurt, I...

It's okay, Dad. Just drop it.

Where are you based?


I'm sorry.

It was a misunderstanding.
Really, it was.

Come on, Ella.

-Why don't you stay?

Um... No, I don't think so.

- Shmick.
- What?

If you could do with a cheaper rebellion
than a boutique Hotel,

that might be nice.


-What's up?
-How are you?

-There you go.
-Thank you.

I turned the heat on for you.