The Bionic Woman (1976–1978): Season 3, Episode 20 - Long Live the King - full transcript

Middle Eastern king Kusari is visiting New York and Jaime Sommers poses as his new social secretary to foil an assassination plot. Unfortunately the foreign agents recognize Jaime and try ...

Your mission will be to keep the King
from getting assassinated.

JAIME: That's poisonous gas!

It has to be me.
Who'd wanna kill you?

That social secretary, Ms. SOMMERS, has not left
the King's side all evening.

So much the worse for her.


I'm taking you off the case.
It's too dangerous!


So, that's the assignment.

Now you know why I had to fly you into New York
on such short notice.

King Kusari from Dalpor.
That's quite an honor.

I've known him for a long time.
He's an old friend of mine.

This is the most glamorous assignment
you've ever given me

and I want to thank you.


And dangerous.

You're going alone on this one.

Your mission will be to keep the King
from getting assassinated.

Who would want to kill him?

He's one of the fairest
and most democratic kings

this world has seen in a long time.

Jaime, there are some undemocratic people
in his country

that have other ideas.


Does the King know that I'm from the O.S.I.?

No. And we'd rather he wouldn't.

He's been offered protection,
but he's turned it down.

But he has accepted an offer from
the State Department

for a social secretary.

Mmm. Miss Social Secretary. Hmm.

You'll be working with Mr. Sam Sloan,

who's chief of protocol
in the city of New York.

Does this Mr. Sloan know that I'm
from the O.S.I.?

Well, won't he guess?

If I know Sam, he'll be busy
admiring your legs.

Well, is he hung up on bionics?

No, no. I'm the one that's hung up
on bionics, remember?

Okay, babe, that's it.
Oh, one more thing.

Keep the royal gatherings
small so we can keep

a close watch on everyone that has
access to the King.

All right.

That's it.






Sally, what's...

Oh, I bet you I know what...

Sure is.

See, I thought it would be better
if I just put him

on the plane with me
and then we'd get up here

and you could help me
find a place to...


I'll arrange a place for Max to be comfortably
housed at the New York lab, Jaime.

Thank you.

Or maybe we could just
find him a job here, huh?



I can't wait for this weekend.

This weekend?

We're going sailing, remember?

Beth, I'm sorry, I can't...

Sam, you promised. I changed all my plans
to be with you this weekend.

Now, darling,

I just found out this morning...

that I have to take care
of a king this weekend.

Well, can't you get somebody else
to take care of him?


Oh, very well.

Beth, this is the CIA.

I... About the security plans for
protecting the King.

I have to talk to them alone, darling.
You understand.

But I promise, I am absolutely
free next weekend.

I hate you.

No, you don't.

It's a date.

Hello, Marilyn.

Excuse me. Hi.
I'm Jaime SOMMERS.

Mr. Sloan is expecting me.

Oh, yes, Ms. SOMMERS.

Mr. Sloan, Ms. SOMMERS
is here.


Please go right in, Ms. SOMMERS.
Through those doors.

Okay, thank you.

Yes, I wanna be there, too.



Yes, it was good talking to you, too.



God, you are not at all what I expected,

I'm very happy to meet you.

Well, thank you. Very pleased to meet
you, Mr. Sloan.

What were you expecting?

Oh, I guess a Washington worry-wart.

A tight-lipped,
humorless, plain-Jane

who dreams of paper shredders instead
of bright red sport cars.


However, you're the freshest

breath of loveliness that's
come into my life

in many years,

Thank you, Mr. Sloan.

Well, please sit down.

And my name is Sam.

All right.

Is something the matter?

Oh, forgive me.

I know we have very important business
to discuss,

but I can't help it,

It's Jaime.


You see...

Five years ago,

Beth and I were engaged
to be married.

A few days before the wedding, she was killed
in an automobile accident.

I'm sorry.

Until now, until you walked
through that door, I...

I've never met anyone who immediately
reminded me of her.

Her warmth,

her naturalness,

and her beauty.

I don't quite know what to say.

Oh, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have
mentioned it.

No. It's okay. You know, I just got
a little embarrassed.

But flattered.
Thank you.

Jaime, let's have dinner tonight.

I'd like for us to get to know
each other better.


Okay. All right. Fine.

Very good.

Now I guess we had better get
back to business.

How dumb can I get?

I left my purse in Mr. Sloan's office.

No, no.
I'll get it.

List of the social events we want
King Kusari to attend.

I forgot my purse.

(STAMMERING) And as you
can see, the electronic surveillance is all...


You must be Beth.

You look fantastic.

Why, thank you.

For a corpse.







Yes, His Highness will see him.

The State Department
has sent a James SOMMERS

to serve as your social secretary.
He's on his way up.

That is considerate of them.

Before Your Highness
goes on to Washington,

arrangements have been made for
a new wardrobe.

Mr. Byron, your New York tailor,

has already been notified.

Good, good, good, good.

Ah! You remember, I also want to do
some shopping

for gifts while I am in New York.

Yes, I remember, Your Highness.
I have prepared a list.

Consult the social secretary about that.

He'll have more current information
on the New York shops.

And I suppose there will be the usual

obligatory social functions.

Yes, I'm afraid so,
Your Highness.

Your Highness,
the social secretary.

How do you do?


Is not James a man's name
in your country?

Yes, it is. My name is Jaime SOMMERS,
Your Highness.

Jaime. Ah!

You must not think my reaction
was disappointment.

It was only surprise.

Okay, thank you.

These are the shops the King wishes
to visit in New York.

The list, I'm afraid,
is a few years old.

Perhaps you can bring it up to date.

Thank you.

No, this list seems to be fine.

What I would like to do is contact the stores
and have them send

a representative with
their wares to you.

So it'll save you a lot of time
and trouble, all right?

That's an excellent idea.

The mayor of the city
is on the telephone.

Would you like to talk to him?

Of course!




Hello, is this the mayor?

There doesn't seem to be anyone
on the line.

Uh... Would you like to see if you have
a preference here of stores?


That is an excellent idea of yours to have the
merchants bring their wares to me.

I don't think that James SOMMERS would
have done as well.

Thank you.

You're quite welcome.

I thought I made it clear you were
never to come here.

Well, I got a little
news for you.

Starting next week, your payments
are doubled.

Doubled? Why?

Well, we got a little trouble with what
you calla cash flow,

and we need more of it coming in faster.

From you.

We made an agreement, Wally.

A guy who gambles and loses more
money than he's got,

he can't afford to argue.

You know what I mean?

Well, I can't handle double my payments
right now, Wally.

You know what I mean?

You getting smart?

No, I'm just telling you
the truth.

You'll find a way.

I doubt it.

If you need some encouragement, uh...

We can take care of that, too.

SHAROKAH: The viewing
glass is closed.

Under cover of the focusing cloth,

I snap it open.

I place my gun

inside the camera.

No good.

Sharokah, I do not want another failure.

The device that was placed inside the telephone
did not explode.

Now, everything that comes into the King's suite
will be inspected.

That gun will be found.

I can take Sharokah's
gun into the suite.

Members of the entourage
will not be searched.

That's better.
Give Kia your gun.


Once you have set up the camera,

Kia will express an interest in it.

You will invite him to take a look inside.

Once under the cloth, Kia can place the gun
into the camera for you.

Much better.

And when they think that I am focusing
on the King,

I aim through the lens
and the King is dead.

And in a few minutes, the news will have
reached our country

and my troops will take the palace.

One other thing, Sharokah.

There may be a woman present from the American
State Department.

If she gets in your way, please do not hesitate
to kill her, too.

Has this equipment been inspected?

Yes, Colonel. It is camera equipment
and nothing else.

His Highness is with
his tailor now.

He'll be up shortly.


All right, hide the gun in the camera now
while no one is looking.

SHAROKAH: I have it right here.


Is everything ready? I would not like to keep
His Highness waiting.

Don't worry, Colonel Mostafa.

Everything will be done
to your satisfaction.

I will get His Highness now.

Hi! Is that one of those cameras that
when you look through it

the people that you're taking the picture of
look upside down?

Well, uh... Yes.

It's a view camera.
Is it?

May I look through it?

I'm sorry, miss, but we...

We can't have the King waiting!

Oh, come on, he's nowhere around,
now, please.




What's going on here?

He was going to kill
His Majesty, Colonel.

Kia, take this man and turn him over
to the New York police.

I think the police would like to have
that weapon.

Good work, Ms. SOMMERS.

Thank you, Colonel.

His Majesty must not find out about this incident
until he is safely back in Dalpor.

It might be too upsetting to him and spoil the
rest of his American visit.

Fine, I understand, yes.

Where's the photographer now?

JAIME: Who knows? - Kia was supposed to turn
him over to the police.

Then he came back with some story about
the photographer

knocking the gun out of his hand and
escaping. I don’t know.

Any possibility that that's true?

No, I'm sure Kia's part of the plot.

Does he have any suspicion of who
you are, Jaime?

I don’t think so.

Well, you better be careful, babe.

I'm gonna.
Good luck.


SAM: And I want the official reception
the city of New York

is going to give for the King to be
absolutely outstanding.

JAIME: Keep it small, huh?

Look, don't worry.

I'll make it as intimate as a candlelit
dinner for two.

And while I'm on that subject...


Oh, come on, Jaime.

How many ways do I have to
say I'm sorry?

I give up.
How many?

Forgive me, huh?

Okay, I forgive you.
It's over, all right?

Now, can we get back
to the party, please?

No, no, no, no. You haven't forgiven me.
I can see it in your eyes.

Look, it was a neat trick, okay?

It was a clever idea, and...

It was dumb.

It was a reflex. I've done it so many times,
it's become automatic.

If that girl had not come back
for her purse,

I would have believed you. We would
have gone to dinner.

And after dinner I would've told
you the truth,

I swear.

I swear.

You're a fascinating
man, Sam, uh...

You're charming and handsome.

And you've got everything
going for you.

I do?
Yes, you do.

But you've got the subtlety of a lumberjack
and you play games.

I don't have to.

I'm not so sure about that.

I could do anything, Jaime, with the
right motivation.

I'm not asking you to change.

I understand that.

I just think it's too bad that you don't
recognize your own worth.


Maybe it's because I had such
a rotten childhood.

Come on, you're doing
it again, all right?

Yes, I am.

Actually, I had a terrific childhood.


You're impossible.

Serves me right.

I finally meet a woman I can be serious
with and I blow it.

Well, you're still young.

I'm not gonna give up on you.


Hey, it's not all my fault, you know.

I can't help it if women see me
as just a sex object.

Oh, please, will you
give me a break?

Come on, now, look it, why don't you and I
get together here

and plan a small, but sensational party
for the King, okay?

All right, we'll have it here
and I will plan

a sensational guest list.

Then I will trim it down
to a proper size.



No, Mr. Byron, I don't think so. I prefer
the first fabric.

I agree, Your Highness.
It suits you better.

Thank you.

Have you picked the fabric for your
ties yet, Your Highness?

Oh, show him,
Mr. Byron.

Oh, yes, they are very handsome,
Your Highness.

Yes, Jaime, I had the list checked.

Any bad apples here?

Well, as far as I know,
everybody's clear.


Okay, well, that's great. Listen, thank you for
rushing this through.

I really didn't want Sam to know that I was having
his list checked out, you know.


Yes, Sam Sloan.

Yes, I know who you mean.

How are you and Sam getting along?

Well, fine, as a matter of fact, we're
having a good time.

Well, you know... I mean, he's very...
He's very nice to work with.

Uh... Oscar?

I 'm here, Jaime.

Yeah, is there anything
else, Mr. Goldman?


No, that's about all.

Take care of yourself,
will you? And...

Say hello to Sam, will you?

All right, I will.
Thank you.

Oh, Jaime, where've you been?
I was worried.

I got caught in your famous
New York traffic.


Well, the staff is gone for the day,

and the invitations for the King's reception
have to be addressed

and delivered by messenger tonight.

So, I guess we're stuck with the job.

Okay. Are you sure this isn't one of your little
ploys to get me alone?

I told you I wasn't giving up.

That's true, you did.

All right. Look,
we'll just split up

the guest list and the invitations
and get to work.


I think that's a marvelous idea

because after we finish with those invitations,
it's gonna be too late

to go out to dinner. So, we're gonna have
to go up to my place

and I'll whip you up
one of my famous

bachelor omelets.

I'll bet you're a terrible cook.

You're right.

Furthermore, I hate eggs.

Well, how does that feel?

How does what feel?

Telling the truth to a lady.

Now, why do I always get the feeling I'm playing
catch-up with you?

Hang in there.
I am.

I will.

Here's your half of the list.
I've got mine.


Right, Hey...

I really like you. A lot.


Don't tell me you gave up already?

No, I didn't give up.
I finished up.

That's impossible.

Check them.

You've either got a flock of elves working
out there with you,

or you’re a witch.

Have a nice evening. I'll see you at
the caterer's tomorrow.

Jaime, what about dinner?


Real soon.

I wondered whether her interference

was as innocent as she tried
to make it seem,

so I had John check into her background.
Tell them what you found.

Well, there's a lot of secrecy
surrounding her,

but I found out that Jaime SOMMERS

is a very important agent of the O.S.I.

We will not be able to carry out our plans
with her around.

I agree. She must be eliminated.

An O.S.I. agent? Hey, that's

MOSTAFA: You'll be well paid.

I heard her say that she will be at the caterer
tomorrow morning at 11:00.

Under the circumstances...

You will be paid the same fee for
getting rid of her

as you are getting for the assassination
of the King.

SAM: The food customs of Dalpor have
to be considered

and the King's personal preferences and prejudices
in the food department.

How do you stay on top of all this?

I don't know, sheer talent.

No, seriously,

it's just all part of the job
along with knowing

who sits next to whom and the order in which
people enter and leave a room.

You have quite a job and you do it very well.
I'm impressed, Sam.

Oh, come on. It's a job like
any other job.

No, no.

There's a certain amount of satisfaction
in doing it well,

or at least trying to.

Well, it's nice that you feel that way
about your job.

A lot of people don't, you know.

Mmm. You must be quite
a social secretary

for the State Department
to assign you to a King.

Well, I ain't too bad, you know.

No, you're not too bad.

Why isn't this elevator moving?

It's not working.

Be out of order for about a half an hour.

What floor do you want?
The third.

Well, if you want to walk, the stairs are over
there. First door on the right.

Otherwise, you're gonna have to wait
about 30 minutes.

Uh, stairs.
The stairs.

We'll take the stairs.
Thanks a lot.

SAM: The King is very
fond of fresh fruit,

so the caterer will tell us what's in season and
we can make our selection, hmm?


Where are the stairs?

I guess this door over here.

It's locked.

This one's locked too.

That's poisonous gas. Come on.


Try it again, Sam, please.


Come on.
You all right?

Yeah, how about you?

Okay, I'm fine.
Let's get out of here.

All right.

Well, Jaime, I feel terrible
about what happened.

It wasn't exactly your fault. You didn't
drop the gas pellet.

Oh, of course not.

But I think I know why it was dropped.

What do you mean?

They weren't out to get us.
They're out to get me.

Because you happened to be with me, you were
almost killed, too.

Why would someone want to kill you?

I, uh... I used to have
a gambling problem.

I got rid of the gambling, but obviously I still
have the problem.

I owe a lot of money.

And you think the people you owe
the money to did that?

What other explanation could there be?
It has to be me.

Who'd wanna kill you?

Listen very carefully, Wally.

I don't know what you and your baboon friends
are trying to pull but...

Hey, Sam, you making some
kind of a joke?

That caper this morning

with the gas, and the elevator
not working,

that was no joke, Wally.

Gas? Elevators?

You losing your marbles, or what?

You didn't try to have me
knocked off?

You think I'm crazy?

If you get knocked off, how are we going
to get our money?

Hey, Sam, if this is some kind of an angle to get
out of paying what you...

No, no, Wally. I...

I'll make the payments.

Yeah, well, you better, Sammy.

OSCAR: I'm getting another agent
to take over for you

and that's all there is to it.

Well, what is that supposed to mean?

Don't you understand?

Your cover is blown. I'm taking you
off the case.

Oscar, Sam doesn't know who I am.

He thinks this whole episode is because
of his silly gambling.

This has nothing to do with Sam.

Well, then what?

I have hard evidence here that the local
group of conspirators

are tied in with a military
group in Dalpor

and plan to take over the country when
the King is dead.

It's too dangerous.

I can't quit now.

Tonight is the reception of the King and I've
got to be with him.

That's all there is to it.

You're stubborn.

And for once, you're right.

MOSTAFA: You've been paid a great
deal of money

and so far you have produced
absolutely no results.

I don't know how they got through
that door.

I checked it out myself beforehand.


That's all I'm interested in.

That social secretary, Ms. SOMMERS, has not left
the King's side all evening.

So much the worse for her.

Meeting people I'll never see again
or ever come to know...

This is the boring part of
the royal profession.

Don't you ever feel like you just
would like to run off

in a corner and hide sometimes?

I'd give half my kingdom
for one minute.


That's a figure of speech.

Your Majesty, good evening.

How do you do?

What a joy it would be, never to have to
force a smile.

You're not forcing one now.

Thank you.

Excuse me, are you George?

No, ma'am.

George is...

George is sick. He asked me to
fill in for him.

How nice.

Your Highness, may you only smile
when you're happy,

and may you smile often.

I like that.

Oh! Oh, how clumsy of me. I'm sorry.

I don't think you are clumsy.

I think you didn't trust that waiter.

I'll get you some more
champagne, okay?

No, no. Thank you.

Is there some place where we could talk?


Come with me.

LYNETTE: Mr. Sloan?

Yes? Mr. Sloan, the mayor
wants to see you.


Yes, of course.

I think you had better tell me
who you are.

I'm Jaime SOMMERS.

I don't mean your name.

I mean, who are you?


I am an OS! agent assigned
to protect you.

From what?

There is a conspiracy to assassinate you while
you're here in New York.

You know that for certain?


And your government sends a woman
to protect me?

I am a highly trained O.S.I. agent,

and I have very special

If you are an example

of the liberated woman,

I regret the traditions
in my country

that makes such progress impossible.

Well, I'm sure that Your Highness can find
a way to make progress.

And still keep the best of your
country's traditions.

I hope so, Ms. SOMMERS.

Hello, this is Jaime SOMMERS.


His Highness is away from the hotel
on urgent business,

but he would like you
to meet him for lunch.

Well, I've already got a date for lunch,

but that's okay, I'll break it.

His Highness would appreciate it. It's a matter
of great importance to him.

Where would he like me to meet him?

There is a charming inn,

a favorite of His Highness
from previous visits here.

He chose it specifically,
so he and you

could talk in privacy there.

Okay, how do I find it?

Don't trouble yourself,

His Highness has already sent
a limousine for you.

Goodbye. Thank you.

Please tell Mr. Sloan that I'm having lunch
with His Majesty.

Of course,

Good morning,

Good morning.

That's impossible. I just spoke
with the King

and he plans on spending the
entire afternoon

at the hotel. He has
appointments set up

with his tailor and a jeweler.

Well, that's the message she gave me about
ten seconds ago.

She said she was sorry she had to break her lunch
date with you, but...

That's strange.

The King thought it was very important.
Very strange.

Jaime, the King isn't having lunch
with you today.

There's something suspicious about
this whole...

And I think my suspicions have
just been confirmed.

All right, come on.
Get over there.

Up against the car.

Hey, look, if you don't
have a license

to practice medicine, you can get yourself
in a lot of trouble.

You know, this is against the law.

Don't give it to me on the left hand, okay?

What difference does it make?

Well, the difference is that I just
had a flu shot

and a tetanus shot and a penicillin shot
all in that arm.

Come on, give me a break, okay?
Thank you. Oh!

Oh, my... Oh.

Okay, come on.


Sam, Sam.







Sam, Sam. Wake up.
Come on.

Come on. Here you go.

Yeah, okay. Yeah.

Take it easy.
Yeah... Yeah.

You okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.

Can you stand up?
All right?

Look, we've got to get back to
the hotel right away.

The hotel. Why?

We've got to hurry, okay? 'Cause it's
gonna be too late.

Wake up. Come on. What are you
talking about?

Please, come on.
You'll be all right.

Are you okay now?
Can you drive?

Yeah, I'm fine. A little in the dark,
but otherwise I'm fine.

It's okay. You drive,
I'll explain it as we go.

I've never seen a bomb this small
with so much power.

Is that a timing device?

Yes. It's a quartz timer.

There's no ticking.
Just as light hum.


JAIME: They're going to try and assassinate
the King this afternoon.

Jaime, are you sure you're all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.
Trust me.

This phony luncheon thing was set up to try
and get me out of the way.

Why was it so important to get you
out of the way?

Because I am not a social secretary.

Sam, I'm an OS! agent.

You're a what?

My assignment was to protect the King

and this secretary bit
was just a cover up.

An O.S.I. agent. Well, who's going to
take care of the kids

while you're out chasing villains?

What kids?

Our kids.
After we’re married.

Look, baby, I like you.
I worry about you.

Couldn't you get into a safer job,
like wing walking?


Sam Sloan, I do believe you've just
blown your cover.

Underneath all those stupid jokes
and games,

there's Avery tender
and sensitive man.

And I think I like him.

It's about time.

The King was supposed to see his tailor
and the jeweler.

Think either one of them
is in on this plot?

I don't know. They both
checked out okay.

When we get back to the hotel,
I'll notify hotel security

and Oscar Goldman, all right?

We'll have the sleeves shortened,
your Majesty.

Fine, fine.

I do hope Mr. Byron's
illness is a mild one.

Oh, Mr. Byron's flu is not serious but
it's very contagious.

So Mr. Byron sent his assistant
in his place.

Excellently made,

but I think I'd like to try the yachting
jacket on first.

I have your yachting jacket right
here, Your Majesty.

Jaime, be careful.



That looks really splendid,
your Highness.






Well, seems like we arrived
in the nick of time.

Hello, Sam.
Hello, Oscar.

Somebody deal with this for me,
will you?

I'm glad to see that everybody's
alive and well.

I wish to apologize for this unpleasantness.

I assure you, you'll have
no more trouble

during your stay in this country.

I'm very grateful for the protection
of the O.S.I.

Especially for the, uh...

Extraordinary services
of my, uh...

Social secretary.

Your Majesty, I would appreciate
you not mention

what you've seen here outside
of this room.

You have my word on it.

No one would believe me
if! did mention it.

Sam, I've got to call the pilot

and let him know I'm ready.
Jaime, it's not fair.

We're just getting to know each other

and now you're gonna
disappear from my life.

I feel the same way.
Then stay.

I can't.
I've got a job.

There are more important things
in life, you know.

What about our kids?

We can't let them wait for their
mother forever.


Come here.

Why don't you just drop your job
and everything

and come to California with me?

I never thought of it
like that before.

Well, I guess it's just as fair
for you to ask me

to give up everything
and go with you

as it is for me to ask you to give up
everything and stay here.

I'd say.

Unusual, but fair.

What am I going to do
without you?

Oh, you'll manage.

You're an incredible lady, lady.

You're not so bad yourself.