The Andy Griffith Show (1960–1968): Season 1, Episode 22 - The Andy Griffith Show - full transcript

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* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* IT WAS FROM AUNT DINAH'S
QUILTING PARTY *

* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* IN THE SKY,
THE BRIGHT STARS GLITTERED *

* ON THE BANKS,
THE PALE MOON SHONE *

* IT WAS FROM AUNT DINAH'S
QUILTING PARTY *

* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

* IT WAS FROM AUNT DINAH'S
QUILTING PARTY *



* I WAS SEEING NELLIE HOME

OH, THAT WAS EXTRA GOOD.

WE OUGHT TO SING
TOGETHER MORE OFTEN.

WOULD YOU MIND SETTIN'
THAT OVER THERE, ELLIE?

I LOVE TO SING
ALONGSIDE BARNEY.

YOU'RE JUST SAYIN' THAT.

YOU GOT A REAL
FAN, BARNEY.

Barney:
THINK SO?

YEAH, BOY.

MORE CAKE, ANDY?

NO, THANK YOU.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH.

HOW ABOUT YOU TWO?

WELL, I BELIEVE I COULD...

OH, I THINK THEY'VE
HAD ENOUGH, TOO.



RIGHT. UH, RIGHT, GANG?

OH, RIGHT.

[ TALKING QUIETLY ]

[ GIGGLING ]

WHAT'S THAT?

POWER FAILURE.

BEEN HAPPENING
A LOT LATELY.

IT ONLY LASTS
ABOUT A MINUTE.

IT'S ALL RIGHT BY ME.

I THINK IT'S
MORE ROMANTIC,
DON'T YOU, ELLIE?

[ giggling: ]
ANDY.

NICE GOIN', CASANOVA.

SO, THEY PUT THIS
POWDER ON, SEE

AND THAT RAISES
THE FINGERPRINT.

WELL, ONCE YOU
GOT A FINGERPRINT

WHY, YOU JUST SEND
HER ALONG TO THE
GOOD OLD F.B.I.

AND THAT CRIMINAL'S
AS GOOD AS A GONER.

WELL, UH, HERE WE ARE.

IT'S BEEN A VERY...

EDUCATIONAL WALK HOME.

OH, I'M GLAD
YOU ENJOYED IT.

WELL...

WELL, WHAT?

WELL, UH...

GOOD NIGHT, THELMA LOU.

GOOD NIGHT.

THELMA LOU?

YES, BARNEY?

NEXT TIME, I'LL TELL YOU
ALL ABOUT THE ASSEMBLY

AND THE OILING OF A
.38-CALIBER REVOLVER, OKAY?

OKAY.

I-I'LL SEE YA.

YOUR MOVE, PAW.

I KNOW IT IS.

I'M JUST FORMULATING
MY PLAN OF ATTACK.

AND I BELIEVE I'VE GOT HER!

YOU SURE YOU WANT
TO MOVE THERE, PAW?

I CAN JUMP YOU.

GO RIGHT AHEAD.
YOU'LL FALL IN WITH MY PLANS.

OKAY.
I JUMP HERE!

NOW WATCH THIS.

I AIN'T FINISHED,
PAW.

I ALSO JUMP HERE, HERE, HERE,
HERE, AND HERE.

GOT ANY PLANS NOW,
PAW?

YEAH, I GOT PLANS TO QUIT
PLAYING WITH YOU.

YOU'RE A RIVERBOAT SHARK
IS WHAT YOU ARE.

Andy:
WELL, GOOD MORNIN'
TO YA, DEPUTY FIFE.

YOU LOOK MIGHTY BRIGHT
AND BUSHY-TAILED.

UH, DID YOU, UH,
DO ALL RIGHT LAST NIGHT?

WHAT ARE YOU
TALKIN' ABOUT

DID I DO ALL RIGHT?

WELL, YOU KNOW,
WHEN YOU WALKED, UH

THELMA LOU HOME, UH...
WHAT HAPPENED?

WELL, WHAT DO YOU
MEAN, "WHAT HAPPENED?"

WE GOT THERE.

YEAH, BUT AFTER YOU GOT THERE

AND YOU SAID GOOD NIGHT
AT THE DOOR... DID YOU, UH...?

[ KISSING ]

ANDY, THE BOY.

HUH?

OH. OH, YEAH.

UM, OPIE, WHY DON'T YOU
RUN ON OUT AND PLAY?

YOU TRYING TO GET RID OF ME,
PAW?

WELL...YEAH.

I GUESS THAT'S
ABOUT THE SIZE OF IT.

OKAY. I'LL GO.

GEE WHIZ, YOU'D THINK

I NEVER HEARD
ABOUT KISSIN' BEFORE.

[ DOOR CLOSES ]

NOW-NOW TELL,
NOW TELL ME.

DID-DID YOU GET
A LITTLE KISSY?

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

NO, I DIDN'T.

YOU DIDN'T?

NO, I DIDN'T.

DIDN'T? WELL, WHY NOT?

WELL, I DON'T KNOW, ANDY.

WELL, I CAN'T HELP IT.

WHEN I'M ALONE WITH HER,
I-I JUST FREEZE UP.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT
TO SAY OR WHAT TO DO.

WELL, HAVEN'T YOU SEEN
ENOUGH ROCK HUDSON MOVIES

TO KNOW HOW
TO SWEET-TALK A GIRL?

TELL THAT GIRL
HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER

OR YOU'RE GONNA
LOSE HER.

GIRLS LIKE TO HEAR
THINGS LIKE THAT.

WELL, I KNOW.

WELL, THERE'S PLENTY
OF THINGS I CAN THINK OF

TO SAY WHEN I'M ALONE--
THINGS SHE'D LIKE TO HEAR.

SURE.
OH, YOU CAN?

LIKE WHAT?

WELL, ANDY,
SEE...

THAT'S WHERE
IT GETS TOUGH.

NOW, I USUALLY THINK
OF THESE THINGS

WHEN I'M SHAVIN' OR
SOAKIN' MY FEET AT NIGHT.

YEAH. WELL-WELL, PLAY LIKE
YOU'RE SOAKIN' YOUR FEET NOW

AND TELL ME SOME
OF THE THINGS YOU SAY.

COME ON.

WELL, UH... I SAY, UH

I SAY, THELMA LOU...

UH, I LIKE YA,
THELMA LOU.

I LIKE YA A LOT.

YOU'RE THE CAT'S.

I-I NEVER SAID
THEM THREE WORDS

TO A GIRL BEFORE,
THELMA LOU, BUT...

BUT I MEAN IT.

YOU'RE THE CAT'S.

I-I THINK ABOUT
YA ALL THE TIME.

SOMETIMES AT BREAKFAST,
I STARE DOWN AT MY EGGS

AND I SEE YOUR FACE
RIGHT IN THERE.

WELL, THERE'S... THERE'S
NOTHIN' I'D LIKE BETTER

THAN TO HAVE YOU AS MY
STEADY GIRL, THELMA LOU

BECAUSE... WELL...
LIKE I SAID...

YOU'RE THE CAT'S.

WELL, THAT'S BEAUTIFUL, BARNEY.

I MEAN IT.

THERE'S NOT A GIRL
IN THE WORLD

THAT WOULDN'T
LIKE TO HEAR

THINGS LIKE THAT
SAID TO HER

AND DO YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE YOU'RE SINCERE.

WELL...

NOW, I MEAN IT.

NOW, WHY CAN'T YOU SAY
THEM THINGS TO THELMA LOU?

OH, I JUST CAN'T.

WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANT,
SOMEBODY TO SAY 'EM FOR YA?

THAT WOULDN'T
BE A BAD IDEA.

BARNEY, I DECLARE,
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU.

YOU SAID 'EM ALL FINE
RIGHT THERE.

HOW COME YOU CAN'T SAY
THE SAME THING TO THELMA LOU?

WELL, I GUESS THE TROUBLE IS
THAT I CAN...

I CAN ONLY SAY 'EM
TO A FACE LIKE YOURS.

CHARACTER.

BARNEY SAID THAT?

ABOUT ME?

HE SURE DID.

HE SAID YOU'RE THE CAT'S.

NOW,
THAT'S A DIRECT QUOTE.

WELL, WHY CAN'T
HE TELL ME HIMSELF?

OH, WELL, BARNEY JUST CAN'T
BRING HIMSELF TO.

GOLLY, SOME FELLAS CAN SPEAK
RIGHT UP TO THEIR GIRLS,

AND SOME CAN'T.

SO HE SENT YOU OVER
HERE TO TALK FOR HIM.

SO YOU'D PLAY JOHN ALDEN.

OH, NOOO.

IF HE HAD ANY IDEA
I WAS OVER HERE

HE'D BE MADDER
THAN A HORNET.

I JUST THOUGHT

THAT YOU OUGHT TO KNOW
HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOU.

WELL, THAT'S NICE
OF YOU, ANDY

BUT I'D STILL LIKE
TO HEAR IT FROM
THE HORSE'S MOUTH.

WELL, YOU AIN'T EXACTLY
GOT A TALKING HORSE HERE.

YOU DO LIKE BARNEY,
DON'T YOU?

OH, OF COURSE, I DO.

THERE'S NO ONE ELSE.

WELL, HE SURE DOES LIKE YOU.

OH, I WISH I COULD HEAR IT
FROM HIS OWN THIN LIPS.

WELL...

I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU'LL EVER
GET IT OUT OF THAT BOY.

WELL, I DON'T, EITHER, ANDY

BUT THERE OUGHT
TO BE SOME WAY

TO PROVOKE HIM
INTO SPEAKING UP.

YOU JUST REMEMBER
ONE THING.

HE THINKS YOU'RE THE
CAT'S. I'LL SEE YOU.

SARAH?

4-3-1, PLEASE.

BARNEY? THIS IS THELMA LOU.

BARNEY, GUESS WHO JUST CAME
CALLING ON ME.

ALL RIGHT. PUT 'EM UP.

WHAT?

YOU HEARD ME.
PUT 'EM UP.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

DO YOU DENY CALLING
ON MY GIRL?

OH. WELL, UM,
BARNEY, UM...

COME ON.
OUT WITH IT!

DO YOU DENY IT?

WELL, UH, YEAH, I
CALLED ON THELMA LOU.

OH!

HOW COULD YOU DO IT?!

HOW COULD YOU TRY
TO STEAL MY GIRL?

HOW?

THIS MAY BE HARD
FOR YOU TO BELIEVE.

NOW, I CALLED
ON THELMA LOU

BUT I CALLED ON HER
IN YOUR BEHALF.

OH, SURE.

I THOUGHT SHE OUGHT TO
HEAR SOME OF THE THINGS

YOU CAN'T BRING
YOURSELF TO SAY.

I WAS TRYING TO HELP.

YOU GOT TO BELIEVE ME.

I DIDN'T TRY TO
STEAL YOUR GIRL.

THEN HOW COME WHEN I ASKED HER
FOR SATURDAY, SHE TURNED ME DOWN

AND SHE SAID
THE SAME THING

FOR THE NEXT
SATURDAY NIGHT

AND THE SATURDAY
AFTER THAT?

SHE SAID SHE WAS HOLDING THEM
FOR YOU.

SHE DID?

YES, SHE DID.

WELL, UH...

OH...

[ LAUGHS ]

DON'T YOU GET IT?

OH, NO, ANDY.

DON'T TRY TO LAUGH
YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS.

THAT'S WHERE
YOU CHEAPEN YOURSELF.

WELL, BARNEY...

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT
IF I STOLE ELLIE?

WELL...

YOU DON'T THINK
I CAN, DO YOU?

WELL, THAT'S NOT

THE POINT.

POINT!

WELL, I CAN
AND THE FUNNY PART IS

YOU'RE THE ONE
THAT SHOWED ME HOW.

ALL I GOT TO DO
IS SWEET-TALK HER

AND I'VE SEEN
ENOUGH ROCK HUDSON PICTURES

TO KNOW HOW TO DO THAT.

BARNEY...

OH, THIS IS THE OLDEST GAME
IN THE WORLD--

STEALING YOUR
BEST FRIEND'S GIRL.

WELL, FOUR CAN PLAY
AT THIS GAME, BUDDY.

YOU JUST WATCH ME.

HELLO, SARAH?

GET ME FLOYD'S BARBER SHOP.

YOU WON'T LISTEN, WILL YOU?

I'M JUST TRYING...

[ HUMMING "BEAUTIFUL DREAMER" ]

[ HUMMING CONTINUES ]

HELLO, FLOYD?

THIS IS BARNEY FIFE.

WHO'S IN THE CHAIR?

WELL, GET RID OF HIM.

I'M COMING OVER
AND I'M READY FOR ACTION.

THAT'S RIGHT.
I WANT THE WORKS--

SHAVE, HAIR CUT, WITCH HAZEL,
EAU DE COLOGNE, TOILET WATER...

IF IT SMELLS, I WANT IT.

[ DOORBELL JINGLES ]

I'LL BE RIGHT OUT.

I'M IN THE BACK.

[ BURLESQUE MUSIC PLAYS ]

HELLO, THERE.

OH, HI, BARNEY.

[ LAUGHING ]

WHAT DID YOU DO
TO YOUR HAIR?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WELL, I'VE NEVER SEEN IT
QUITE THAT WAY BEFORE.

LIKE IT?

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT ON YOU?

KINDA... GETS
TO YOU, DON'T IT?

OKAY, BARNEY,
WHAT'LL IT BE?

DOES IT HAVE TO...

BE ANYTHING?

WELL, NO. NO.

YOU CAN SIT DOWN
IF YOU LIKE.

I JUST HAVE THIS
PRESCRIPTION TO FINISH.

YOU KNOW THE LIGHT IN HERE

DOES CRAZY THINGS
TO YOUR HAIR.

WHAT?

OH, WHY PRETEND?

I LIKE YOU, ELLIE.

YOU'RE MY KIND
OF WOMAN.

WHAT?

LET'S NOT TRY TO
FIGHT IT... BABY.

BARNEY FIFE,
HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING?

OH, BABY...

OH, NOW, STOP.

I HAVEN'T TIME
FOR THIS NONSENSE.

NOW, STOP ACTING
LIKE A JUVENILE.

I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU, BABY.

YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE
TO FLY WITH ME

BUT YOU WASN'T
WOMAN ENOUGH.

NOW THE BALLOON'S
GONE UP WITHOUT YOU.

I KNEW I SHOULD
HAVE CALLED YOU

BUT I JUST DIDN'T THINK
HE'D GO THROUGH WITH IT.

WELL, IT LOOKS
LIKE WE GOT US

THE ETERNAL QUADRANGLE,
DON'T IT?

YOU CERTAINLY
HELPED MATTERS

WITH THAT CALL
ON THELMA LOU.

WELL, DAD-BURN IT

I STILL THINK I WAS
DOING THE RIGHT THING.

SHE'S JUST USING THAT
TO MAKE BARNEY JEALOUS.

UH-OH.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

HERE COMES THELMA LOU.

YOU BETTER HAVE
A TALK WITH HER.

I FIGURE TO.

HI, ANDY.

HELLO, ELLIE.

Andy:
THELMA LOU.

THELMA LOU, I WANT
TO ASK YOU SOMETHING.

HOW COME YOU TOLD BARNEY
I CALLED ON YOU?

WELL, YOU
DIDN'T WANT

TO KEEP IT A
SECRET, DID YOU?

HOW WOULD THAT LOOK?

WELL, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE
BARNEY'S MISUNDERSTOOD

THE NATURE
OF THAT VISIT

AND IT ALSO SEEMS LIKE
YOU MIGHT BE THE ONE

ENCOURAGING
THAT MISUNDERSTANDING.

NOW, AM I RIGHT?

WHY, ANDY,
ALL I DID WAS...

[ DOOR OPENING ]

UH, WELL...

I'D BETTER
BE GOING.

BYE, ALL.

BYE, ANDY.

DID YOU HEAR THAT?
"BYE, ANDY."

THAT WAS
FOR YOUR BENEFIT.

CAN'T YOU SEE
WHAT SHE'S DOING?

OH, NO, DON'T.

THERE'S NO POINT

IN PLAYING OUT
THIS FARCE ANY LONGER.

WHAT?

YOU BETTER
GET YOURSELF
ANOTHER DEPUTY.

I'LL JUST STEP OUT
OF THE PICTURE.

THAT POOR, SORROWFUL FELLA.

HE ACTUALLY BELIEVES
YOU'VE STOLEN HER AWAY FROM HIM.

LORD, I WISHED I HADN'T
HAVE NEVER GOT INTO THIS.

OH, I WAS JUST AMAZED

WHEN HE WALKED IN
PLAYING CASANOVA.

OH, BARNEY'S DIFFERENT.

YOU JUST CALL HIS BLUFF

MAYBE WINK AT HIM
A COUPLE OF TIMES

AND I GUARANTEE YOU

HE'D RUN LIKE
A SCARED RABBIT.

SAY, THAT'S NOT
A BAD IDEA.

WHAT?

SUPPOSING I DO
MAKE THE RABBIT RUN.

MAYBE YOU COULD WORK
THE SAME TRICK

ON YOUR LITTLE BUNNY.

THELMA LOU?

OH, YOU MEAN MAYBE

IF WE GET BOTH
OUR RABBITS TO RUN

WHY, MAYBE THEY'D RUN
RIGHT INTO ONE ANOTHER.

MIGHT JUST.

WELL, ELLIE MAY,
I SAY, BEHIND
THAT PRETTY FACE

YOU GOT AN AWFUL
HANDSOME BRAIN.

WHY, ANDY.

HELLO, THELMA LOU.

COULD I, UH, TALK
WITH YOU FOR A SPELL?

OF COURSE YOU CAN.

COME ON IN.

WOULDN'T THE PORCH SWING

BE A LITTLE MORE,
UH... COZY?

YES, I GUESS IT WOULD.

SAY, LOVELY DAY,
ISN'T IT?

MM-HMM.

UM, WHAT WAS IT YOU
WANTED TO SAY, ANDY?

CAN'T YOU... GUESS?

NO.

IT'S ABOUT YESTERDAY.

I'VE BEEN DOING
A LOT OF THINKING

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

WE CAN NO MORE
STOP THE FATES

THAN WE CAN
THE OCEAN'S TIDE

OR THE SUN
AND THE MOON.

WHAT?

OH, I KNOW

WHEN I CAME
TO CALL YESTERDAY

I CAME TO SPEAK
FOR SOMEONE ELSE.

YES?

AND THEN

FICKLE FATE
TOOK OVER.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

OH, I'VE TRIED.

I'VE TRIED...
BUT I CAN'T FIGHT IT.

THELMA LOU...

YOU AND ME
ARE STAR-CROSSED.

ANDY!

OH, I KNOW I SAID A LOT
ABOUT SPEAKING FOR BARNEY

BUT THAT WAS A PRETENSE.

I WANTED TO SPEAK FOR ME,
BUT I DIDN'T DARE.

WELL, NOW, I DO DARE.

I AM SPEAKING FOR ME.

THELMA LOU,
I WANT YOU FOR MY OWN.

YOU CALLED FOR ME,
ELLIE?

OH, THAT'S
RIGHT, BARNEY.

THIS IS PROBABLY
MY LAST OFFICIAL ACT

AS PEACE OFFICER
IN MAYBERRY.

WHAT'S THE TROUBLE--
VANDALISM?

BEING MY LAST,
I HOPE IT'S A GOODY.

COME ON IN THE BACK.

IT'S NOT
AN OFFICIAL CALL, BARNEY.

HUH?

YOU CAN PUT THAT AWAY.

I JUST WANTED TO SEE YOU
ABOUT, UH, YESTERDAY

THE THINGS YOU SAID.

OH... THEM.

WELL, I'M SORRY.

OH, DON'T BE. SAY THEM AGAIN.

HUH?

PLEASE?

UH, WELL, YEAH...

BUT WHEN I SAID
'EM YESTERDAY

YOU SAID I WAS
BEING JUVENILE.

OH, I WAS WRONG.

IT WAS I
WHO WAS A JUVENILE

A FRIGHTENED
LITTLE GIRL.

FRIGHTENED?

AFRAID TO ACCEPT THE DREAM
THAT WAS OFFERED TO ME.

BUT NOW IT'S
DIFFERENT?

AS DIFFERENT
AS NIGHT AND DAY.

YESTERDAY,
YOU WERE BARNEY FIFE

JUST A GOOD FRIEND.

BUT TODAY I REALIZE
YOU'RE NOT JUST A FRIEND.

NOT A FRIEND?

NO.

YOU'RE THE MAN I WANT

AND WITH YOUR HAIR THE WAY
IT WAS YESTERDAY.

N-N-NOW, NOW, NOW,
NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW...

ANDY, WHY DON'T YOU
THINK THIS OVER?

TAKE A LITTLE TIME.

LOVE DON'T HOLD
A STOPWATCH.

SOMEWHERE, SOMEHOW

SOMEONE WANTED US
TO BE TOGETHER.

WHAT FOR?

YOU DID?

YES, AND I'LL
DO IT AGAIN.

ANDY TAYLOR!

ELLIE WALKER!

OH!

REALLY, ELLIE,
HE DID? HUH?

OH, I WISH YOU
COULD HAVE SEEN HER

GET UP OFF OF THAT SWING
AND RUN IN THAT HOUSE

AND SLAM THAT DOOR!

UH, YEAH. I'LL, UH...

[ softly ]:
I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.

HERE COMES BARNEY.

OH, HOWDY.
HOWDY, THERE, BARNEY.

GOLLY. YOU LOOK
ALL SHOOK UP.

WHERE YOU BEEN?

ANDY?

HUH?

UH, I DON'T KNOW HOW
TO TELL YOU THIS, BUT...

WELL, YOU'RE MY FRIEND

AND... YOU'VE GOT
A RIGHT TO KNOW.

KNOW ABOUT WHAT?

IT'S ABOUT ELLIE.

ELLIE?

YOU BETTER
SIT BACK, PAL.

THIS COULD BE A JOLT.

[ CLEARS THROAT ]:
WELL, NOW, UH...

I GUESS THAT YOU...
YOU FIGURE THAT

ELLIE'S KIND OF...
KIND OF SWEET ON YOU.

BUT, UH... WELL, UH...

I GOT TO TELL YOU

THAT IT-IT-IT
JUST AIN'T SO.

NO?

I'VE JUST COME

FROM HER ARMS.

YOU?

I'M SORRY, ANDY

BUT YOU JUST
GOT TO FACE THE FACT THAT...

WELL, I'M THE ONE
SHE'S SWEET ON.

OH, I-I KNOW
I OUGHT TO BE HAPPY.

I GOT BACK AT YOU

AND STOLE YOUR GIRL
AWAY FROM YOU

BUT, WELL, SOMEHOW
IT JUST DON'T MAKE ME HAPPY.

IT'S A HOLLOW VICTORY.

I'M SORRY, BUDDY.

I'M SORRY
FOR THIS WHOLE UGLY MESS.

BARNEY...

HE'S IN THERE.

I DON'T WANT TO SEE HIM.

IT'S YOU I WANT.

Y-YOU WANT ME?

[ CHUCKLING ]

WELL, YOU'RE-YOU'RE
THE SECOND ONE TODAY.

BARNEY, SOMETHING
HAPPENED A WHILE AGO

THAT-THAT BROUGHT ME
TO MY SENSES.

YEAH?

BARNEY, NOW...
NOW DON'T BE ANGRY

BUT I MADE UP THAT
WHOLE THING WITH ANDY

JUST TO GET YOU JEALOUS.

YOU-YOU DID?

WHETHER YOU SWEET-TALK
ME OR NOT, BARNEY

IT'S YOU I WANT.

[ CHUCKLING ]

[ CLEARS THROAT ]:
WELL, YOU KNOW...

IT'S, UH, IT'S FUNNY
THAT YOU SHOULD SAY THAT.

IT IS?

YEAH. BECAUSE, WELL...

SOMETHING HAPPENED TO ME, TOO,
A LITTLE WHILE AGO...

SOMETHING THAT I...
I THOUGHT I WANTED TO HAPPEN

BUT, WELL, WHEN IT HAPPENED...

[ chuckling ]:
WHY... NOTHING HAPPENED.

NOTHING?

NO. IT-IT COME TO ME
THEN THAT...

WELL, YOU'RE... YOU'RE
THE ONLY GIRL FOR ME.

OH, BARNEY...

POOR OLD ANDY.

WELL... SOME OF US GOT IT,
SOME OF US AIN'T.

ELLIE?

LOOKS LIKE WE DID IT.

YEAH. ROMEO AND JULIET
JUST WALKED OFF ARM IN ARM.

* OH, LIL' LIZA

* LIL' LIZA JANE

* OH, LIL' LIZA

* LIL' LIZA JANE

* OH, LIL' LIZA

* LIL' LIZA JANE

* OH, LIL' LIZA

* LIL' LIZA JANE

EXTRA GOOD!

I LOVE THEM FAST ONES LIKE THAT.

I THINK I'M GOING TO GET US
A SNACK.

OH, GOOD IDEA!

GOOD IDEA, ELLIE.

YEAH, A LITTLE SNACK
WILL GO GOOD RIGHT NOW.

A LITTLE SNACK
NEVER HURT NOBODY.

[ CHUCKLES ]
YEE! YEAH, BOY!

MM!

UH, DON'T YOU THINK YOU BETTER
HELP ELLIE IN THE KITCHEN?

NO, SHE DOES VERY WELL
BY HERSELF.

[ CHUCKLING ]

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

[ SIGHS ] BOY.

HMM?

OH, UH, LET ME, UH, LET ME GIVE
YOU A HAND, ELINOR.

[ CLEARS THROAT ]
WELL, THELMA LOU,

LOOKS LIKE YOU AND ME
ARE ALONE TOGETHER AT LAST.

MM-HMM.

HEY, BARNEY,
YOU WANT SOME PIE?

YEAH, PIE IS FINE.
FINE.

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

WELL, WHERE WERE WE?
OH, YEAH.

YOU WANT SOME CHEESE
ON YOUR PIE?

YEAH.
CHEESE IS FINE.

YOU WANT CREAM AND SUGAR
IN YOUR COFFEE?

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, CREAM AND
SUGAR AND PIE AND CHEESE,

AND I'LL GET IT MYSELF.

[ WHISTLING SPRIGHTLY TUNE ]