Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (1993–1999): Season 5, Episode 25 - In the Cards - full transcript

Jake and Nog go through hell and high water, from participating in an auction to dealing with the Dominion, to receiving a Willie Mays baseball card, all in order to cheer up the war-fatigued Captain Sisko.

Did you hear
about the Tian An Men?

She was reported
missing last night

near the Cardassian border.

That's three
in the last three weeks.

At this rate, we're going
to run out of ships.

Well, that's not funny.

It wasn't meant to be.

Unless Starfleet Command
actually starts doing something

about the Dominion threat,
the situation's

only going to get worse.

Well, what do you want, Julian,
a war?

What I want
is to talk about something else.


what about Kirayoshi?

Is he walking yet?


Not yet, no.

Odo, I understand

you're going to Bajor next week.

Do you plan to see Dr. Mora?

Uh... actually,
I've canceled my trip.

There's been a 75 percent jump
in the theft of medical supplies

and food rations on DS9.

I haven't seen
such an increase since...


Since just before
the Cardassians were forced

to abandon the station.

On that note,
I think I'll turn in.

Oh, me, too.

Thank you for dinner, Captain.

It was wonderful.

It was my pleasure.


Good night, everyone.

Mr. Worf.

You've been paroled.

The party's over.

Thank you, sir.

Good night.

Don't bother.

I'll clean the rest up later.

I want to be alone for a while.

Go on.


Good night, sir.

Ops to Captain Sisko.

Go ahead.

We just received a message
from Bajor, sir.

Kai Winn will be coming
to the station tomorrow morning

and she'd like to meet with you.


Thanks for
the invitation, Jake.

That was a lot of fun.

Did you see
how down my dad was?

He tried to hide it

but I could tell
he was depressed.

He's not the only one.

Look around.

There's something in the air.

People are scared.

Yeah, but he's usually the one

who tries to lift
everyone's spirits.

I mean, people go to him
for encouragement.

Where does he go
when he needs it?

I hope I'll be seeing
the two of you tomorrow

at 1200 hours.


Haven't you heard?

There's going to be an auction

of some of the galaxy's rarest
and most valuable antiquities.

Find something you like

and make a bid
with all that latinum

you've got stashed
under your bed.


Oh, Nog, you don't really
keep it under your bed?

No, of course not.

Where'd you get
all this stuff, Quark?

I'm just conducting the auction
for a modest commission.

The items up for sale

were all aboard
an old derelict freighter

that the Bajorans found adrift
about a light-year from here.

The cargo hold was crammed
with valuable items

of every description:

Antiques, paintings, vehicles.

It's all a bunch of junk.

Listen to some of this stuff.

A mid-24th century,
ceramic Romulan water basin...

slightly cracked.

A pair of Tellarite shoes...
date unknown.

A mid-20th century
hu-man baseball card.

A Tholian pedestal...

A baseball card!

A mint condition, 1951

Willie Mays rookie card!

Nog, this is it!

What do you mean?

It's perfect.

This is how I can
cheer up my dad.

You know how much
he loves baseball.

He'll go nuts when he sees this.

Tell him to be here
at 1200 hours

and he can bid
along with everyone else.

I'm going to bid on this.

He's always doing things for me.

I want to do something for him
for a change.

And this is it.

All I have to do
is get him this card.

How hard can that be?

Come on, Nog.


Why not?

It's my money, Jake.

If you want to bid
at the auction,

use your own money.

I'm human...
I don't have any money.

It's not my fault
your species decided

to abandon
currency-based economics

in favor of some philosophy
of self-enhancement.

Hey, watch it.

There's nothing wrong
with our philosophy.

We work to better ourselves

and the rest of humanity.

What does that mean exactly?

It means...

it means we don't need money.

Well, if you don't need money

then you certainly
don't need mine.

How much latinum do you have?

How much?

Five bars.

Five bars!

Look, it's taken me a lifetime
to save up that much money

and I'm not just going to throw
it away for some baseball card.

Not even for my father...

the man who made it possible

for you to enter
Starfleet Academy?

Oh, no.
That's not fair.

The man who believed in you
when no one else would.

Oh, this is so low.

I can't believe you'd rather
keep your filthy money

locked up in a box
under a bed

than use it to give him
endless moments of happiness.

All right!
All right!

I'll do it.

That's very generous of you,

I'm proud of you.

Now, let's get that money.


Come in.

Welcome back to Deep Space 9,
Your Eminence.

Thank you, Emissary.

You may go now, child.

Thank you.

Why don't we take a walk?

A walk?

Would you mind?

Something wrong, Eminence?

No, nothing wrong

but there was a shop
down there, as I recall...

a woman who sold
Bajoran tapestries and antiques.

Ah. Kandra Vilk.


I believe she moved
to a neutral world

near the Cordon system
about two months ago.

So many people have
left Deep Space 9

in the last few months.

I'm sure there are times
when you must feel

as if you're
being abandoned here.

Forgive me, Eminence

but I have a very
busy day ahead of me.

I'm here to meet a
representative of the Dominion.

To what end?

I... I don't know.

This meeting is being
held at their request.

You disapprove?

I'm concerned.

The Dominion is notorious
for its political intrigue.

Well, I have some experience
in that area, as well.

This is a delicate moment
for Bajor.

This conflict between the
Federation and the Dominion

could escalate into
open warfare at any moment.

A misstep now could result
in the destruction of our world.

For once, I am
in complete agreement with you.

You have my word

I will do whatever it takes
to safeguard Bajor.

Walk with the Prophets.

The bid is to you, sir...

one bar, three strips.

Don't let the lady
steal this fine example

of post-Eventualistic,

bronze and triptin sculpture
for such a pittance.

One bar, three strips.

One bar, four strips,
and it's all yours...

an honorable addition
to any Klingon household.


all the proceeds
from this auction

go to the Bajoran
War Orphans Fund...

minus a modest commission.

Think of those poor,
Ionely children

and how much your latinum
will mean to them.

Looks like the kids
will have to make do

with one bar, three strips.

Sold to the blue man
in the good shoes.

Lot 48.

An Andorian chest

containing a pre-Surak
Vulcan bracelet

a sixth century Bajoran mandala

a 23rd century ion-transtator

a Willie Mays baseball card
from Earth, dated 1951.

Who will start
the bidding with one bar

of gold-pressed latinum?

- One bar.
- One bar.

Do I hear one bar, five strips?

One bar, five strips.

Do I hear one bar, ten?

Don't worry.

He'll drop out at two bars.

How do you know that?

I'm still a Ferengi.

- One bar, ten.
- One bar, ten.

One, 15?

One, 15.
One, 20?

One, 20.

One, 25?

Two bars.

The bid is two bars.

Do I hear two bars, five?

Vedek, are you in?

I told you.

Two bars, five.

Three bars.

Four bars.


Ten bars.

The bid is ten bars

of gold-pressed latinum.

Is there another bid?

What do we do now?

We're out of money.

Jake, do you want
to make another bid?

Sold to the gentleman
sitting in the aisle.

Lot 49.

A rare example of a 20th-century
human art form...

acrylic on black velvet.

This image was the inspiration

for the flag of the Martian
Colony in the 22nd...

Look, l-l-I know
you wanted that card

but we lost it, okay?

So let's come up
with something else

to cheer up your dad, huh?

Uh... like a new pair
of shoes.


What's wrong with shoes?

Nothing, except it's stupid.

I want to give
my dad something

that'll bring a little
joy into his life.

Something special.

I'm telling you, that
baseball card is the answer.

It's kismet.

"Kiss you"?

Kismet... fate.


I was meant to give
that card to my father.

Jake, I think you're taking
this whole baseball card thing

way too seriously.

It's not the card.

It's my dad.

This is very important to me.

My father's never let me down.

He's always been there for me
when I needed him

and right now, he needs me.

I don't want to let him down.

Nog, please.

Let's get that card.

All right.

What do you want to do?


Excuse me.

Sir? Could we talk
to you for a minute?

Who sent you?

No one.

We wish to discuss
a business transaction.

Not interested.

You don't even know
what it is yet.

We just want to buy
the baseball card.

Listen to me.

I haven't done anything wrong

and I won't be hounded by you

and your soulless minions
of orthodoxy.

I haven't broken any laws

except, perhaps,
the laws of nature...

so stay away from me.

Habitat Ring.

Captain Sisko!

I can't tell you how happy
I am to see you again.

I wish I could say the same.

How delightful!

You feel comfortable enough
around me to make jokes.

I'm so pleased to see
our relationship evolving

the stale adversarial stage.

No, it's not, but before you
twist that into a compliment

let me be blunt:
I don't like the Dominion.

I don't like what it stands for
and I don't like you.

So let's dispense
with the hollow pleasantries

and stick to business.

I can't tell you how it pains me

to hear you say that, Captain.

You see, I really like
Deep Space 9 and I like you

and after this meeting
with Kai Winn

I think you and I will be seeing
a lot more of each other.

Jake... Jake!

He wants to see us!

- Who?
- Dr. Giger...

the man who bought
the baseball card.

He wants us
to come to his quarters.

He says he's willing
to make a deal.

You're kidding.

He left a message for us

about an hour ago.

It said to meet him
at 1800 hours.

That's in ten minutes.
Let's go.

Remember... let me
do the talking.


You had your chance
on the Promenade.

Now, stand aside

and let a professional
handle this.

Step out of the doorway, please

and don't touch anything.

This is very
sensitive equipment.

I did some checking on you two.

It turns out that you are
the Station Commander's son

and you are
the nephew of the man

who owns the bar.

That's right.

Since you are not, in fact

working for the soulless minions
of orthodoxy

that have hounded my work
and plagued my existence

I have decided to open
negotiations regarding the sale

of a mint condition
1951 Willie Mays

rookie card...
without the original

packaging or chewing gum.

We would like to open

the negotiations
with a bid...

The card is not for sale.


But you just said...

I am willing to trade the card

in exchange
for the following items.

Two liters of anaerobic
metabolites suspended

in a hydrosaline solution?

A neodymium power cell?

Where are we supposed
to get all this stuff?

the Station Commander's son

and a promising young cadet
have access to a wide variety

of equipment and supplies

that would not be available
to someone like myself.

It's a very long list.

It'll take some doing.

Wait a minute.

What are you planning
to do with these things?


Look, we can't start
delivering equipment

and medical supplies to you

without knowing what you're
going to do with them.

Very well, young man.

Let me ask you both
a simple question.

Do you want to die?


Not really.

Of course you don't.
So why should you?

Why should any of us end up
as putrefying corpses

in wooden boxes
stuck in the ground?

Or vaporized
into subatomic particles

and vented into the cosmos
like a bad case of gas?

No reason that I can think of.

I have devoted my life...
to the study of death

and do you know what I found?

Death is nothing more
than the result

of cellular boredom.


Think about it.

The cells in your body

have been doing the same job...

the same dull,
monotonous routine

every day
since you were conceived:

Metabolize, divide,
metabolize, divide.

Wouldn't you get bored?

Of course you would.

So, at some point, the cells
just say, "That's it."

And you, the unwary victim
of cellular ennui

are quite literally...
bored to death.

I never thought about it
that way.

Dr. Bathkin of Andros III
was the first to come up

with the answer
to solving the puzzle of death:

Keep the cells energized.

Keep them in the game

by teaching them
new mitochondrial tricks.

before he could finish his work

Dr. Bathkin died
in a shuttle accident.

Or so they say.

And while the soulless
minions of orthodoxy

refuse to follow up
on his important research

I could hear the clarion call
of destiny ringing in my ears.

And now, after 15 years
of tireless effort

after being laughed at

and hounded out of the halls of
the scientific establishment...

after begging and scrounging
for materials

across half the galaxy...

I have nearly completed work...

on this:

The cellular regeneration...
and entertainment chamber.

What does it do?

I'm glad you asked.

It is specially designed
to transmit biogenic energy

on a chromoelectric wavelength

and send uplifting...
and entertaining messages

to the nuclei
of every cell in your body.

Spend eight hours
a day in this machine

and your cells
will never get bored.

You will never grow old...

and most important...

you will never die.

That is the goal of my work...

nothing less
than immortality itself.

Excuse us for a moment.

Of course.

What do you think?

I don't know.

I'm no expert
in cellular chemistry

but his theory sounds
a little odd to me.

He had me going there
for a minute

but... a cellular
entertainment machine?

He's crazy, isn't he?


But he does have
the baseball card.


So, that means

we've got to help him.

I'm not so sure
this is such a good idea.

Nog, I can't let my father down.

Let him down?

Your father doesn't even know
this card exists.

I don't know which of you
is crazier.

I'm not crazy.

I'm... just a little obsessed.

"A little"?

Okay, Doctor.

We're in.

Do you how many germs
are transmitted

by a handshake?

You want to kill me?

Just nod if we have a deal.

Him, too.

Hey, Chief, we need
a neodymium power cell

from a Cardassian
phase-coil inverter.

You think you could help us out?

That's an unusual
piece of equipment.

What do you need that for?

We have to trade it for a...

It's kind of a secret.

Well, I'm sure
there's an old cell

lying around here somewhere

but I don't have time

to scrounge around for it
at the moment.

What's the matter with you?

Just tell him you're trying
to give your father a gift.

No! I want it to be a surprise.

You know you can't keep
a secret on this station.

If I tell the Chief, he tells
Keiko, Keiko tells Dax...

But you're not giving him
any reason to help us.

Okay, let me show you
a little something

about incentive-based
economics, huh?

Chief, may I ask you a question?

Wouldn't you rather

be doing something
else right now?

Almost anything.

But isn't there
something specific

you'd rather be doing?

Uh... like, uh...

going to the holosuites, maybe?


I bet you'd rather
be kayaking right now

wouldn't you?

You probably haven't shot
those rapids in weeks.

No interruptions...

no maintenance schedules...

just you and the river.

Hmm... well, that's what
I'd be doing right now

if Decker hadn't gotten sick.

But I have to recalibrate
all these EPS regulators

so they don't interfere

with the station's
artificial gravity grid.

What if someone else

recalibrated the regulators
for you, huh?

Someone... like us?

You'd do that for me?


Don't give it a second thought.

Just go shoot those rapids.

Thanks, thanks a lot.

I owe you one.

Our pleasure, and Chief...

about that power cell...?

Oh, yeah...

I think I know
where there's one.

I'll have it sent up
to your quarters.

Thanks, Chief.

Come on.

You calibrate, I'll scan.

Five liters
of anaerobic metabolites

in hydrosaline solution.

What could you possibly
want with that?

We can't tell you.

It's a surprise for someone.

They're not going
to drink it, are they?

Oh, no...

At least, I don't know...
is he?

Look, I don't have time
for this.


Can I ask you one question?

Wouldn't you rather be doing
something else right now?



No. This is the first chance
I've had

to get any research done on my
prion project in five months.

You couldn't drag me
away from here.


What Jake is trying to say
is that you seem... unhappy.

I... suppose I have been
feeling a little down

now you come to mention it.

Just out of curiosity

if you had to name one thing

that would make you happy
right now, what would it be?

I don't know.

Humor me.
One thing...

anything at all.


Excuse me?

That's what I want.

Leeta borrowed him...
said he was "cute"...

but she never brought him back.



You bring him to me

and you'll have earned

five liters of anaerobic
metabolites suspended

in hydrosaline solution.


Uh, just one thing, Doctor.

What's a Kukalaka?

Weyoun has made
a startling proposal.

The Dominion wishes to sign

a nonaggression
treaty with Bajor.

They're trying to split Bajor
from the Federation.

Forgive me, Emissary

but you've already done that.

It was your advice
six months ago

that kept Bajor
out of the Federation.

How did you put it?

"Bajor must stand alone."

Well, we are
very much alone now.

Even though you're not a member
of the Federation

Starfleet is committed
to the protection of your world.

We're not going to stand
idly by

and watch the Dominion
conquer Bajor.

Can you promise me

that you will not let
one Jem'Hadar soldier

set foot on Bajor?

Can you promise me
that you will use

your entire fleet
to protect our planet

even if it means
sacrificing other worlds

like Vulcan

or Andor

or Berengaria...

or perhaps even Earth itself?

I can't make
that kind of promise.

I wouldn't believe you
if you did.

So you see my predicament?

If we ally ourselves
with the Federation

against the Dominion

we risk becoming the first
casualty of the next war.

And if you ally yourselves
with the Dominion

you risk becoming
the next conquered world.

A most unhappy choice.

I have asked
the Prophets to guide me

but they have not
answered my prayers.

I even consulted the Orb
of Wisdom before coming here

and it has told me nothing.

So I come to you, Emissary.

You have heard
the voice of the Prophets.

You were sent here

to guide us
through troubled times.

Tell me what to do,
and I will do it.

How can I save Bajor?

You want my advice?

Then, this is it...


Tell Weyoun you have to consult
with the Council of Ministers

or you have to meditate
on your response...

anything you want...
but you have to stall for time.

Time? For what?

I don't know.

But I do know the moment
of crisis isn't here yet

and until that moment arrives

we have to keep
Bajor's options open.

I'm aware that this
is difficult for you

given our past.

But this time,
you have to trust me.

Very well, Emissary.

We put ourselves in your hands.

May we all walk
with the Prophets.



mildly entertained.

I still get a little bored
after the first five hours.

I've got half the things
you wanted.

Good, good.

the hydrosaline solution?

We should have it soon.

Nog just got the bear.

Don't ask.


Do you know what that is?

It's the sound of immortality.

What's going on down there?


Turn that down!


I'm working out here!

So am I!

I have to listen to all
of Worf's opera recordings

and filter out
the sub-harmonic distortions!

Can you turn that down?!

I'm trying to add a little humor

to Kira's speech
to the Agricultural Delegation!

No! I have to listen
at precisely 82 decibels

because that's the volume
Worf listens at.

Of course, if I could
have simply told him

why I needed two meters

of electro-plasma conduit
from the Defiant

he probably would have
just given it to me

and things would be a lot
quieter around here!

We can't tell anybody, Nog!

Now, listen to this
for a second.

"Thank you
for that kind introduction

"and thank you for inviting me
to address you here tonight.

"I've always thought it odd

"that the topic
of water reclamation

was usually treated
as such a dry subject."

Is that funny?


I didn't think so, either.

Would you watch it
with that thing?!

Trying staying out of the way!

He's probably sleeping

in his cellular
entertainment thing again.

It's not locked.

No, there is no record
of a Dr. Giger

being assigned
to those quarters.

He was there, Odo.

Maybe the soulless minions
of orthodoxy

finally caught up with him.

The who?

We don't know who they are

but they were after

Dr. Giger's
cellular regeneration

and entertainment chamber.

His what?

It's a device used to keep

the cells in your body
from getting bored.

You see, he was going
to transmit messages

to people's cells

to keep them entertained

so they wouldn't die off

and as a result,
these people would...

live forever.


Do you really think

he's going to charge us
with filing false reports

obstructing justice,
being public nuisances?

I can't have that
on my Academy record.

I think he was just
trying to scare us.

Nog, look.

It's Kai Winn.

Do you see
who she's talking to?

That's the Vedek
who was bidding against us

at the auction.

Jake, I don't know
what you're thinking

but I'm sure
I'm not going to like it.

Don't you see?

The Vedek was
bidding on that lot

because there was an old
Bajoran mandala in there.

He must have been
working for the Kai.

When they lost, the Kai
must have gotten angry

and we all know
how dangerous she is

when she's angry.

What are you saying?

That in order to get the
mandala, she kidnapped Giger?

It all makes sense now.

Jake, I'm really starting
to worry about you.

Come on.

Where are we going?

Let me introduce you to
a new human expression.

We're going to beard
the lion in its den.

Lions, Gigers, bears...

Oh, my.

I hope you've found our talks

as rewarding as I have,
Your Eminence.

May I inquire
if you plan on giving

the First Minister
a positive recommendation

the nonaggression pact?

I'm afraid I cannot reveal
my recommendations

to the First Minister.

You understand.

Of course, of course.

Forgive me for even asking.

It is enough to know

that you and I have found
so many common interests.

I feel...

that we are very much alike.

No, we are nothing alike.

Nothing at all.

What is it, my children?

We need to talk.

You accused the Kai
of burglary and kidnapping?!

We didn't really
accuse her of anything.

Oh, I see... you just implied it.


Are you trying to be funny,

Because I'm not laughing.

No, sir.

I want an explanation
and I want it now.

Well, sir, it all began

in my Uncle Quark's bar
when we saw this list...

We were in the bar

and l-I guess
we got a little drunk.


It won't do any good
to lie about it, Nog.


Captain, I would like
to separate myself...

As you were, Cadet.


I see that my faith in the two
of you has sadly been misplaced.

You both are confined
to quarters

until further notice.


What did you say that for?

I didn't want him
to know about the baseball card.

Of course not.

If you tell him about the card
he might forgive us.

He might even be grateful
for all the effort

we've gone through
just to make him happy.

We certainly don't want that.

Habitat Ring.

Once we get the card,
everything will be fine.

Jake, as your friend,
I think I should tell you

you're starting
to go over the edge.

You need to get
some perspective on all this.

You need to get away,
clear your head.

This isn't what I had in mind.

Do you think I'm a fool?

Let's start at the beginning.

What is the nature
of your relationship

with Dr. Elias Giger?

We barely know him.

He had a baseball card

that I wanted to give to
my father to cheer him up.

My father's the Station
Commander, by the way.

I know who your father is.

Go on.

That's it.

We wanted the card,
and so we agreed to help him get

a few things for his research.

We got all the equipment

but he disappeared
about three hours ago

and we haven't seen him since.

Do you really expect me
to believe that everything

you've been doing
for the last 22 hours

has been perfectly innocent?

That it was merely a coincidence

that Dr. Giger
has been running experiments

with highly charged
polaric particles

directly below my quarters?

I suppose there's also
an innocent explanation

to the secret meetings
you've been having

with virtually
the entire senior staff

of Deep Space 9

or that Kai Winn met with you
immediately after leaving me?

I suggest that you stop

playing games with me
and tell me the truth...


This is all
just a misunderstanding.

Nothing's going on

and we're certainly not involved
in some secret plot against...

You betrayed me.

You turned me over to these
soulless minions of orthodoxy.

Well, they won't discover

the secret of my work
without a...



there are secrets after all.

There shouldn't be any secrets
between friends, Jake

and I do want
to be your friend.

Do something.

All right.

We'll tell you the truth.

I'm listening.

We weren't supposed
to divulge this

but since
you left us no choice...

we're working
for Starfleet Intelligence.

Oh, no.

Forget about it, Nog.

We have to tell him.

We're investigating the man

whose picture
is in your hand right now.

Until yesterday, that man...
one Willie Mays...

did not exist
in any historical documents.

Then, in the blink of an eye,
that card appeared

on the station.

And at that same moment,
a bust of Willie Mays appeared

at the Hall of Fame
in Cooperstown, New York.

There's only one explanation.

We suspect that this man...

is from the future.

A time-traveler?

That's right.

And so far, that card
is the only link we have to him.

We must find out

what he's planning
to do in the past

or what he may
have done already.

We need that card.

The entire future of the galaxy
may depend

on us tracking down Willie Mays
and stopping him.

I believe you.

You do?


That is,
I believe your first story...

that you're two innocent boys

trying to give a gift
to Captain Sisko.

You are very wise.

Which still leaves
the question...

what you were doing
beneath my quarters.

He's harmless.

He's just working on a way
to become immortal.


I have a background in...
shall we say, creative genetics.

I'd be most interested
in hearing your theories.

Well, it may take
some time to explain.

Let me ask you
a simple question.

Do you want to die?

Uh, excuse me.

Can we go?

Of course.

Thank you.

Aren't you
forgetting something?

Captain's Log, Stardate 50929.4.

Two days ago,
this station felt like a tomb.

I'd never seen
so many of my crew

depressed at the same time.

But for some reason, it now
seems as though a new spirit

has swept through the station

as if someone had opened a door

and let a gust of fresh air
blow through a musty old house.

Why this is happening,
frankly, is a mystery to me.

After all,
nothing has really changed.

The Dominion is still a threat

the Cardassians
are still threatening

to retake the station,
and I can still see

the clouds of war
gathering on the horizon.

So why do I sense a new-found
sense of optimism in the air?

So why do I sense a new-found
sense of optimism in the air?

But maybe I'm
overthinking this.

Maybe the real explanation
is as simple

as something my father
taught me a long time ago.

Even in the darkest moments,
you can always find something

that'll make you smile.