Picket Fences (1992–1996): Season 3, Episode 16 - Heroes and Villains - full transcript

[Jimmy] Previously on
Picket Fences.

Good morning,
ladies and gentlemen,

allow me to introduce myself.

My name is Laurie Bey,
better known
as the Dancing Bandit.

Please try to remain
as calm as possible.

‐[all screaming]
‐[gunshots]

‐Dancing what?
‐Bandit.

Modern‐day Robin Hood.

Steals from the rich,
gives to the poor.

[interpreter]
What a gorgeous little boy.

‐[Laurie sighs]
‐You know sign language?



This woman
is not getting away.
I finally got her.

Freeze! Damn it!

‐Laurie!
‐Freeze!

‐[gunshot]
‐[gasps, grunts]

She was trying to escape, Zack.

I am the sheriff.

She does good things
for people who need help.

‐But she breaks the law.
‐So you shot her.

[interpreter]
I made a lot of mistakes.

I'm sure your dad has, too.

Shooting me
wasn't one of them.

‐[machine beeping]
‐[gasping]

Her heart rate's up to 230.
She's got to go to Chicago.

‐Chicago? Why?
‐We don't have the equipment.



Chicago General
is sending a chopper.

[sighs] Your wife is okay?

We needed the Air Evac.

The chopper you called for?
It's over there.

The one that just left
is ours.

What the hell is going on?
Why is there another chopper?

I have no idea.
There must be some mix‐up.

[birds chirping]

[air brakes hissing]

‐Is that your garbage?
‐Yes.

That's a lot of garbage
for one small boy.

But my hair is red.

It's nice the way
the light hits red hair,
don't you think?

Reminds me of a sunset.
A red sunset.

Would you like to see the
inside of a garbage truck?

‐Is it nicely appointed?
‐That's a subjective question.

I didn't think you'd come.

What?

And miss your birthday?

I told you I'd come.

‐[chuckles]
‐I did the code right.

I remembered
all the code words.

He sure did.

‐Hey!
‐For me?

Happy birthday.

This is the best birthday
I ever had.

‐[Laurie chuckles]
‐[sirens blaring]

What happened?
What's happening?

Um... it's okay.

Careful with the boy.

Get out of the truck
with your hands up.

Send the boy out first.

The boy has to go.

All right, go get him.

Driver, Ms. Bey, you're next.

‐[man] Let's go.
‐Hands above your head.

[officer] Step out now.

Finally.

You have the right
to remain silent.

Anything you say can
or will be used against you
in a court of law.

You have the right
to talk to a lawyer

and have him present for
or during your testimony.

[theme music playing]

[theme music ends]

No one in or out
without clearance.

Andrew, Cobb, I don't
want them left alone
for a minute.

‐What the hell's going on here?
‐We got her!

‐The Dancing Bandit is ours.
‐What are you doing
with Zachary?

Your son's been
communicating with Ms. Bey
through cyberspace.

They've been talking
with each other by computer.

She came to visit him
for his birthday

and we were there
to pounce.

‐Lock 'em up!
‐[stutters] Wait a minute‐‐

‐What the hell?
‐I want a lawyer.

‐You're not in trouble, son.
‐Yes, he is.

‐In my office. Now!
‐[grunts]

I want guards posted
outside the jail quarter,

outside the jail window‐‐

‐Around the whole building.
‐[officer] Yes, sir.

‐You seem excited.
‐We got her. [sighs]

We finally, finally got her.

‐[sighs]
‐[door slams]

I am shocked.

She's a fugitive.
Wanted by the law,
wanted by me!

You've been communicating
with her for a year...

she comes to visit you‐‐

How dare you not tell me?

I was afraid you'd shoot her.

[sighs] You're lucky
you're not charged
with a crime.

Aiding and abetting a fugitive
is a crime, young man.

This is unconstitutional.

[scoffs] Go home.

‐You're grounded.
‐[door opens]

[sighs] I'm very disappointed.

You forgot to say
happy birthday.

[sighs]

[bailiff] Case number 22166,
People vs. Laurie Bey.

On the charges of robbery
and kidnapping.

Douglas Wambaugh
for the Dancing Bandit.

She hasn't hired me yet,
Judge, but she will.

Oh, my little friend.
How are you?

Your Honor,
this is just an arraignment.

I fully expect this case
to be transferred
to federal court

where Ms. Bey will stand trial
for numerous federal offenses

committed over
the last four years.

Excuse me, Your Honor,
that won't be happening.

‐Who are you?
‐My name is Janice Neiman.

I'm with the United States
Attorney's Office.

We will be seeking
to try Ms. Bey
right here in Rome.

What?

I don't have jurisdiction
over the federal crimes.

We're just charging her
with the bank robbery
that occurred in this county.

Why is that?

It's the only offense we're
interested in prosecuting.

Counsel in chambers now.

What the hell are you up to?

She's covered her tracks
very well.

We feel we'd have a hard time
securing convictions

in almost all the other cases
except for this one.

For the bank robbery,
we've got witnesses.

We can put her away
for this offense.

So this is the one
we'd like to prosecute.

‐I object, Your Honor.
‐[Henry] Why?

I don't know,
she seems tricky.

The bank robbery is also
a federal crime, Ms. Neiman.

You could go
to federal court on that.

We'd prefer to try it here.

‐Why?
‐I'm not sure.

[chuckles]
They're up to something.

‐Are they charging me?
‐Not yet.

For this trial,
they just want Laurie.

They must think that
they have a better chance
of convicting you in Rome

than with
a federal court jury.

[Rebecca] Why would they
think that?

Because she's a folk hero.
A modern‐day Robin Hood.

She never hurt anyone.

She feeds the homeless,
defends the handicapped.

There isn't a jury
anywhere that's gonna
want to convict her.

[Littleton] Yes,
including here maybe.

So what makes you think
a Rome jury is gonna be
any different?

Because the jurors here
know and love Jimmy Brock.

This is a small county that's
very prosecution‐friendly.

If they see you
sitting with us...

we undercut
the Dancing Bandit's sympathy.

We lose more trials
than we win.

[Janice] Here's the deal,
we need a fast trial.

With every article
that gets published
about this woman,

her popularity goes up.

We want the fastest criminal
conviction possible.

To nip her hero status
in the bud.

We can go after her
on the federal crimes later.

What if the defense doesn't
agree to an immediate trial?

Oh, they will.
Wambaugh has a short
attention span.

I don't know.

I'm still not sure this town
would convict her.

They have to.

We have a star witness.

Who?

‐Me?
‐You were in the bank.

There were a lot of people
in the bank. Plus‐‐

‐Most of whom we plan to call.
‐[Jimmy sighs]

You looked
right into her eyes...

you also treated her
after she was wounded.

Which is the problem
right there

because a doctor
can't be forced to testify
against her patient.

Yes, she can.

Your testimony, Dr. Brock,
would be the most credible.

As I've already explained,
you're a trusted member
of the community‐‐

A former acting mayor.

[sighs] Thank you.

[Janice]
You are of crucial influence.

[sighing heavily]

I'm sorry. But...

Well, I have misgivings about
testifying against Laurie Bey.

I happen to like her.

And she's been
so good to our son.

She's in jail right now for
wishing him happy birthday.

She's in jail
for robbing banks.

Well, I'm sorry. No.

Jill, we will subpoena you.

[Jill] Fine, go ahead.

I can't be sure
what I'm gonna say.

Well, actually,
we have a little...

insurance policy on that front.

Oh?

[Janice] We happen to be
aware of the fact

that you knew Laurie Bey
was getting in a bogus
FBI helicopter...

but you stayed silent
as that helicopter
flew off into the sunset

carrying a fugitive.

Jill?

[sighs]

I... I didn't know
that it was an escape

until she was already
on the chopper.

But you could have
told the FBI right then

and they could have
pursued her.

Instead you stayed silent.

Helping a fugitive escape
is a crime that comes
with a prison term, Dr. Brock.

What‐‐ [scoffs]
You're gonna arrest me?

And think nothing of it.

You don't take stand

and offer up
convincing testimony
against Laurie Bey...

I will absolutely
prosecute you.

I don't like your tactics,
Ms. Neiman.

And I especially don't like
that you used my son
to catch your suspect.

It's not your fault.

But if I didn't ask you
to come for my birthday...

they wouldn't have caught you.

[Laurie sighs]

‐Secret?
‐[Douglas] Uh, does this
involve the truth?

Because I can leave.

No, you can stay.

I knew the government
was breaking into my computer.

I knew because
I was tapping into theirs.

And I knew that they knew
that I was coming
for your birthday,

and that they were
planning to capture me.

You did?

There was supposed to be
a roadblock on Eight Rod Road

after I said goodbye to you.

I didn't think they'd hit while
you were still in the truck.

But I guess
they got nervous.

I'm sorry you had to
experience that.

Wait, I, uh...
I don't understand.

You wanted to get caught?

[Rebecca]
I'm tired of running.
I wanna live a life.

Then why didn't you just
turn yourself in?

[Rebecca]
I'm proud of everything
I've done, Zack.

I know it's been
outside the law
but I have no regrets.

If I surrendered...
I'd be saying I was wrong.

I didn't want people
getting that idea.

I prefer to be captured.

And do you wanna be convicted?
I need to know these things.

I wanna walk tall
but I wanna walk free.

‐Get me an acquittal.
‐Please.

Well, they have you
on videotape

going into the bank
with a big gun.

Think of something.
You're Douglas Wambaugh.

The prosecution
wants to move fast.

Are you ready to go
right away?

Are you?

All right.

All right,
Ms. Dancing Bandit...

Let's go to trial.

[sighs]
Can we talk about this?

‐Jimmy?
‐I am the sheriff
of this town.

And my wife, my own wife...

[Jimmy sighs]

helps an FBI most wanted
criminal escape‐‐

‐My own wife!
‐[slaps palm on thigh]

‐I apologize.
‐You apologize?

That's all you can say?
You "apologize"!

Well, that, and... [sighs]

I'm sorry.
[chuckles nervously]

Dad, come on,
the candles are melting.

‐I don't care!
‐He's in the kitchen,
he can hear you!

He committed a crime, too.
My own wife, my own son.

Jimmy, it's his birthday.

Can we try
not to completely ruin it?

Zack, get out here
and blow out these candles
on this cake!

‐This instant!
‐Oh, that's nice.

Hey!

♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

♪ Happy birthday dear, Zack ♪

[Kimberly] Oh! There's one
still left burning.

‐[spits]
‐[Jill] Oh, gee, Zack!

That's not the way
we blow out candles.

You can't tell me who
I could have as friends

just because
you're the sheriff.

My wish was that
you don't testify.

[Jimmy sighs]

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

I really am sorry, Jimmy.

I just didn't want her
going to jail.

Did Zachary know
that you stayed silent?

Did he know that you helped
the Dancing Bandit get away?

Yes.

‐[door slams]
‐[Jimmy sighs]

He was so upset thinking
that she was sick‐‐ You know,
with her bad heart?

He was afraid
she was gonna die.

I... I had to tell him
that it was an escape plan

and that she was
gonna be okay.

[Jimmy sighs]

How could he know that it was
okay to go behind my back?

Because he saw
his own mother do it.

What was the message
you were sending, Jill,

that adorable criminals
are above the law?

I just‐‐ I didn't want
Laurie Bey to go to jail.

I didn't really think about
the big picture. Okay?

You have to testify.

I don't think I can do that.

You heard that
federal prosecutor.

She said she'd come after you
if you didn't cooperate.

Do you really think
that a jury
is gonna punish me

for sympathizing
with the Dancing Bandit?

No, everybody loves
the Dancing Bandit.

That's why
you have to testify.

I don't think I can do that.

‐[sighs]
‐[dish clatters]

[Janice]
Ladies and gentleman
of the jury...

my name is Janice Neiman.

I'll be the prosecuting
attorney on this case.

Along with John Littleton
who I believe
you already know.

The case today involves‐‐

Your Honor,
the defense stipulates

that my client, Laurie Bey,
robbed a bank.

We admit to everything
in the indictment.

No, no, no, you don't.

‐Mr. Littleton.
‐Well, he does this,
Your Honor.

You know he does this.
See, he does this.

He stipulates to our entire case
so we have no record‐‐

I'm just trying to help.

Oh, yeah, that was
your nickname
in grammar school, right?

You were the little helper?
We don't want your help, okay?

‐What's happening?
‐[Henry] Quiet.

Counsel in chambers. Now.

I'm just trying
to speed things along.

[Littleton] Oh, yeah,
you're very thoughtful.

"Mr. Helper."
That was your nickname, right?

[Douglas]
A nickname of affection.

I don't hear
any affection here‐‐
And that troubles me.

No. No, no. No, no. No.

‐How do you really feel?
‐Be quiet.

Why take up court time
with something

you don't have to prove?

We admit‐‐ She robbed a bank.

[scoffs] I'm sorry,
I'm a little confused here.

That's exactly
how I want you.

‐Look at his shoes.
‐Oh, shut up, Doug!

‐[Janice] Just one second.
‐[sighs]

You are the defense attorney.

How can you just admit
to the charges?

Defense attorneys
don't do that.

‐Oh, no, no, no, he does.
‐Why?

She's asking you why.

Look, by offering up
a straight admission,

he preempts us from
putting up witnesses
to tell our story.

Then he puts up
his witnesses.

So when the jury
goes back to deliberate

they have all the defense
witnesses fresh in their mind,

and all they get
representing the prosecution
is dry stipulation.

‐I'm shocked.
‐But that isn't smart,
that's dumb.

‐Thank you.
‐If you admit to the charges,
the case is over.

Then it doesn't matter
how many witnesses
he sticks up there.

‐The case is over.
‐No.

Why are we arguing?
Let's just let me be stupid.

[Littleton] But you're not
stupid, Doug.

Now, he's probably gonna try
and argue something like

jury nullification
or self‐defense.

[scoffs]
Oh, that's ridiculous.

She walked into a bank
with a gun and held it up

It's on video‐‐ [scoffs]
Self‐defense? That's absurd.

Well, defense strategy
is defense strategy.

But I see no point
wasting time

trying to prove facts
he stipulates to.

‐So‐‐
‐[Littleton] One witness,
Your Honor. Please!

Allow us one witness
to put a face
on the prosecution.

I'll stipulate
you have a face.

‐[Henry] Shut up!
‐Be quiet.

[Janice sighs]

I'll give you one witness.
Then the prosecution rests.

‐[Henry sighs]
‐I can't believe you, Doug.

Eh, you never believe it
but it's always true.

Douglas Wambaugh,
I'll never stop!

[door closes]

Ms. Neiman?

Get out.

They're selling them outside.

Ten bucks.

[chuckles] Is that me?

You're prettier in person.

You're sweet.

[Jimmy] Zack, go home.

If you wanna talk to her,
she needs an interpreter.

I know sign language.

Fine. Interpret this.

Stay away from my son.

I don't like your influence.

Maybe you're
the bad influence.

Let's go.

[Laurie sighs]

‐We need you.
‐We've been allowed
one witness.

It has to be you.

I‐‐ I've told you,
I'm just not comfortable
doing that.

Jill, we're talking about
a woman who's been
on a four‐year crime spree.

[Jill] Well, I'm not gonna
testify for her.

I just don't wanna
get on the stand against her.

Please, don't make me
play my hand
against you, Dr. Brock.

I don't wanna go after you,
I really don't.

She's not afraid of you.

It's okay to break
the law sometimes.
Tell her, Mom.

Honey, I never said
it was okay
to break the law.

You told the federal
government to stick it

when they
ordered busing.

You've gone to jail
lots of time for contempt

when you've disobeyed
Judge Bone.

Zachary, those were very
complicated situations.

And what about the law
that said child molesters
should get to live here?

Lots of laws suck.

‐Zachary Brock‐‐
‐It's true.

That's why
the Dancing Bandit is good.

And that's why my mom
helped her get away.

My mother won't help you.

Government sucks.

You hold it right there,
young man!

Now you get down here
and you apologize
to all the people in this room.

‐No.
‐What did you say?

‐I said no.
‐You get down here right now.

You get down here or
I'm gonna come up‐‐

You shot her in the back!

‐You're a bad influence.
‐You get down here!

[gasps]

[door slams]

Um... [smacks lips]
Uh... I'll testify.

I was standing there, uh...

ready to make a deposit
with my son.

And suddenly she just
charged into the bank‐‐

‐She being?
‐Laurie Bey. Right there.

And what happened next,
Dr. Brock?

Well, she announced herself.
She shot out the video.

She told us all
to get on the floor

and her gang proceeded
to rob the bank.

She held you all
at gunpoint?

[Jill] Yes.

‐Were you afraid?
‐Well, of course.
We were very afraid.

She opened fire.

Security guards
could have shot back.

Police surrounded the place,
ready to shoot‐‐

My son was there...

[sighs deeply]

It was an armed
bank robbery.

[Douglas] Sounds terrifying.

But you later
came to believe...

this person was not a threat
to society, didn't you?

[Jill]
Well, yes, that's true.

In fact, you had your son
visit her in the hospital?

You even helped her to escape,
didn't you?

No, I didn't help to escape.
I just‐‐

You knew that
she was flying away in
a phony FBI helicopter

yet you stood back
and you said nothing.

Dr. Brock?

I was wrong to do that.

[Douglas] I'm not interested
in your hindsight.

True or false,
as Laurie Bey sailed away
in the helicopter...

you were glad
she was getting away.

You were glad, weren't you?

‐Yes, but I‐‐
‐[interrupting]
Well, thank you.

Nothing further.

Dr. Brock... [clears throat]
are you glad now?

No. I realize
that as romantic

as the escapades
of the Dancing Bandit
may be...

[inhales deeply]

she is a criminal
and she should be
going to jail.

[Janice] Thank you.

Did the prosecutors
ever threaten to charge you

for aiding and abetting?

‐[both] Objection!
‐Ooh, it seems
I touched a nerve!

Any potential charges to be
brought against this witness‐‐

I'm only looking for bias.

For example,
maybe the District Attorney

promised not to prosecute
Dr. Brock

if she gave
a good testimony here.

‐Objection!
‐[Janice] Move to strike!

Ooh, two questions,
two nerves.

[clicks tongue]
Did that happen, Dr. Brock?

‐That's not why I'm up here.
‐Did that happen?

Well... sort of.

Hmm! I think I'm having
a Wambaugh moment, Judge.

I could feel the tingle.

What tingle?

You don't wanna know.

I feel paralyzed.

[grunts softly]

I don't know what I even begin
to say to him when he
makes a gesture like that.

What do I say?

He's hurting, Jimmy.

He adores this woman.
We're trying
to put her in prison.

He's hurting.

That's an excuse
for him doing that?

‐He gave me the finger!
‐[chuckles]

Well, I think
you need to resist your
natural impulse to...

...ground him till he's 30.

Yeah.

He worships you, Jimmy,
you know that.

Don't take it personally.

Easier said than done.

...the bank
was federally insured,

so the theft was from
the federal government,
not people.

But even so, to steal
from the federal government‐‐

But I gave it back
to the federal government.

I put the money
into flood relief.

I stole money
from a federal program

that was investigating
the benefits
of cow flatulence.

To me, starving people
trying to survive a flood

were more important
than cows breaking wind.

Well, we love our cows
in Rome.

Some of them
give birth to humans!

‐[crowd murmurs]
‐I'm sorry, what?

He said that
cows here on occasion
bear human children.

I'll strike it
as being irrelevant.

Thank you.

[Douglas] Well, let me see
if I get this straight.

By robbing the bank...

you were simply trying
to fight the atrocity
of government waste

and reappropriate
pork barrel federal funding

to help the struggling people
in need,

and to make this world
a better place
for all mankind?

Objection!
He's not paraphrasing testimony,

he's making a speech.

‐And I loved it!
‐[applauds]

‐[crowd applauds]
‐[Henry] Quiet!

‐Quiet down!
‐What is happening?
They're applauding.

‐[banging gavel]
‐[Henry] I said quiet!

[applause continues]

Had you been at the flood,
you would be applauding, too.

How much money do you make?

‐What?
‐Objection!

Wambaugh.

I have never, never seen
a courtroom like this.

[Douglas] Well,
you're a big city attorney,

you have no sympathy
for the small towns.

‐Objection!
‐Move to strike!

[Douglas]
And what kind of a woman
would run around

‐prosecuting the deaf?
‐[Littleton] Doug,
what are you‐‐

Wambaugh! Get up here, now.

All of you.

I will hold you in contempt.

[whispers] I don't mean it.

[normal] I was just trying to
characterize you

as a horrible
person for the jury.

Shut up! What she did
with the money is irrelevant.

And you will ask
no more questions about it
or I will throw you in jail.

Get back!

I'm sorry, Ms. Bey.

The court is not interested
how you helped the needy.

And the judge doesn't care
what you did with the money.

But I promise,

to Mrs. Englander,
who is sitting over there,

whose baby got food,
she cares.

‐Stand up, Mrs. Englander.
‐Wambaugh!

Sit down, Mrs. Englander.

My hands are tied.

Nothing further. Tragic.

So, Ms. Bey... [sighs]
how are you?

[interpreter] Fine.

Thank you for asking.
How are you?

[chuckles] I'm okay.

Um, after you finished
robbing the bank,
you did a little dance?

Yes.

[Janice] As is your custom,
right?

That's why they call you
"the Dancing Bandit."

You end every caper
with a little performance.

True.

[Janice] And according
to your little pronouncement
in the bank‐‐

One of the reasons you do this
is to establish, uh...

a folklore to humanize you?

Which would really
come in handy with the jury,

should you ever
be brought to trial.

You said this, didn't you?

[interpreter] Well, sometimes
when I'm robbing a bank...

I shoot my mouth off
a little.

The truth is‐‐
I just love to dance.

[crowd murmurs]

You truly are
an infectious personality.

Objection to the term
infectious, Judge.

It makes her sound diseased,
ill or handicapped.

She says that because
my client is deaf...
and Jewish!

‐You should be ashamed!
‐[stammers] What?

‐[gasps]
‐Wambaugh! [grunts]

The jury will disregard
defense counsel's last remark.
Continue, Ms. Neiman.

[sighs]

Zachary?

Zack... would you
come up here for a second?

‐Objection!
‐Oh, I'm not calling him
as a witness.

I just want to stand
beside me for a second...

After everything
he's been doing,

you gotta give me
some latitude.

Zachary, please step up here.

Hi.

What you got there?

Oh, my gosh, this is a...

That's a Dancing Bandit doll,
isn't it? Where'd you get this?

They're selling them outside.

This is the little boy
you came to say
happy birthday to, isn't it?

Yes.

[Janice] Oh, he is so cute.

You know, you've gotta be
the most sympathetic
defendant in the world.

You steal from the rich,
you give to the poor,

risk your freedom to wish
a little boy happy birthday.

The Dancing Bandit!

I suppose you know there's
a whole flock of people
from Los Angeles in town

just dying to buy
the movie rights
to your story?

Ms. Neiman, there's latitude
and there's latitude.

You know what
I object to most?

Not that you steal.

Privately, I... I kinda
cheer for your cause‐‐

As I'm sure everybody does
in this whole room.

Like he does.

I object to the dancing.

That's why I'm coming
after you so hard.
Because you dance.

Make it so fun.

What did you give him
for his birthday?

‐Is this relevant?
‐I haven't a clue.

What'd you give him?

[interpreter] A book...

called High Stick
by Teddy Green.

Well, that's not all
that you gave him.

Last night,
I saw this little boy

and heard him
tell his parents

that it's okay
to break the law.

I heard him say that
the federal government sucks.

Then this cute little boy...

I saw him extend
his middle finger

and make an obscene
gesture to the sheriff...

the sheriff...
who also happens
to be his father.

[interpreter] Did you
do that, Zack?

‐Yes.
‐[interpreter] Why?

'Cause he's the police.

That's what you gave
this child for his birthday.

The fact
you never shot anybody

doesn't mean
you're not dangerous.

As far as as I can tell...
you do more than rob banks.

You stole something
from this family.

What's the little dance
that goes with that?

You've questioned enough,
Counsel.

[smacks lips] Okay. I'm done.

[sighs heavily]

Me?

Defendants can do
their own closings.

I already cleared it
with Judge Bone.

‐No!
‐I'm too scared.

Laurie, that was
a good trick she did,

pulling Zack up there
for the jury to see.

You'll have to close.

‐[interpreter]
But what will I say?
‐[scoffs] Who knows?

On the facts you go to jail,
on the law you go to jail.

There's a theory called
jury nullification.

Which, technically,
we're not allowed to argue.

But maybe...
we should try it anyway.

Oh, I could always say
that I told you not to use it

but you couldn't hear me

because the batteries
in your little hearing aid
went dead.

But the main thing
to remember is this...

the jury is made of people...

which makes our system human
and very imperfect.

That's our best hope.

[overlapping chatter]

[sighs] He wanted to hear
closing arguments

so I thought
we could sit together.

[interpreter] Ms. Neiman

talked about what I gave
Zachary Brock for his birthday.

Maybe I gave him the idea
that law and order
is not important...

that being a criminal's okay.

If I sent that message...

that was wrong
and I apologize.

But maybe I gave him
the idea that laws
need to be questioned.

That sometimes government needs
to be looked at with scrutiny.

Sometimes it's hard
to really tell the good guys
from the bad guys.

If I gave him that
for his birthday, good!

But, Zack...

I told you this last year
and I tell you again...

I'm not a hero.

I don't believe in heroes.

I believe in people trying hard
to leave a situation

better off than
how they found it.

Your father does that,
he does it everyday.

I try to do that, too.

Here's what it comes down to.

If you think that society
would be better off
with me in jail...

put me away.
If you don't, don't.

In either case...

the Dancing Bandit is no more.

I will never rob another bank
or commit another crime.

I promise.

And I never break my promises.

Do I?

It's one thing to target
the bad people
in government...

If you condemn the person
just because
he's in government,

just because
they're the police...

if children are picking up
that signal from me...

then Ms. Neiman
was absolutely right.

This bandit
has no right to dance.

My intentions
have always been good.

I know that's not enough...

[sighs]

I believe
she's just escaped.

[crowd gasps, murmurs]

Duh! I'm just kidding!

[all chuckle]

Your turn.

Well, delightful,
right to the end.
[chuckles]

You know, it's so easy
to almost forget

that she walked
into a bank with a gun,
started shooting,

causing the police
to surround the place,

taking aim on it with a full
arsenal of weapons...

innocent people inside.

She created
a crisis situation.

Lives could so easily
have been lost.

That is not delightful.

Laurie Bey
is a dangerous criminal.

She wants to tap into
your frustration
with the government,

evoke compassion
for who she is.

Fine! Be frustrated.

Like her.

Even admire her a little,
I certainly do.

But don't let it blind you
to the fact

that she is a bank robber.

This woman
is the defendant's friend.

Part of her I bet is even
hoping for an acquittal today.

And yet she took the stand
and she testified against her.

Why?

Because sometimes justice
has got to win out

over what's popular.

Sometimes you have to
go against your
sympathetic instincts

and do the tough jobs.

Tough jobs.

Because truth demands it.

And now...

now, it becomes your work.

You want to set her free?
Ah! Of course, you do.

[sighs] The thought of her
being in jail...
it seems atrocious.

Truth is tough, ugly work.

Maybe there aren't
heroes anymore...

but I have to believe
there are heroic acts.

And for the sake of truth.

And, yes, justice...

you must find
Laurie Bey guilty.

Thank you.

[indistinct conversations]

She's going to jail,
isn't she?

Well, both sides gave
good closing arguments.

But, you know, she might
get a light sentence

because
she's a philanthropist.

‐A what?
‐[Jill chuckles]

A person who means well.

I'm sorry
I gave you the finger.

‐You are?
‐Yeah.

‐Hey, jury's back.
‐Already?

‐[sighs]
‐She's fried.

Let's go.

Mr. Foreman, has the jury
reached a verdict?

We have, Your Honor.

What say you?

On the matter
of People vs. Laurie Bey...

on the charges of felony
robbery, kidnapping
and false imprisonment...

we find the defendant
not guilty.

[crowd murmuring]

‐[banging gavel]
‐[Henry] Quiet down!

I said quiet!

Members of the jury,

this is the time
I thank you for your service

and adjourn the case...

but your service
was terrible.

There was no factual dispute
before you...

you had no basis whatsoever
for an acquittal.

You didn't have the guts
to put her away,
that's what happened.

You all decide to become
Dancing Bandit yourselves

and forsake the law!

But guess what?

The defendant
is not free to go.

I will see her and counsel
in chambers now.

Our system of justice
maybe imperfect...

but it shouldn't be
this imperfect
while I'm on the bench.

You are a putrid jury.

Adjourned. Chambers.

Get out!

[Douglas] What a victory!

I wish all my clients
were deaf.

‐Shut up!
‐[door closes]

Just a little Wambaugh
acquittal humor.

Here's the deal, Counsel.
Plea bargain.

The jury verdict aside,
I find your client
in civil contempt...

and I sentence her
to 3,000 hours
of community service.

‐What?
‐[Henry] She can work
right here in Rome.

I can see she's got talent.
We'll find a way
to put it to use.

‐Well, you can't do that.
‐I just did.

Are you prosecuting her
on any of the federal charges?

I don't know.

Well, you can't do this.
Not even you.

She got an acquittal,
it's over.

‐You can't sentence her with‐‐
‐I did it!

‐Well, then I will appeal.
‐No. I'll take it.

You don't have to,
you're completely free.

[interpreter]
I'll take it, it's fair.

It isn't fair.

You going to prison
would be fair.

You're getting another chance,
young lady.

Most criminals don't.

And you are a criminal,
make no mistake.

I've just bought your soul.
Don't you dare let me down.

I won't.

[camera shutters clicking]

[overlapping chatter]

The halls are crying
with press.

‐Excellent!
‐[Janice] Oh, God!

A victory is nothing
without the opportunity
to rehash it.

‐Come, my little friend.
‐Hold on.

[sighing] Oh, boy,
did I pick the wrong place
to try this case.

[chuckles] You think it'd be
different any place else?

[scoffs] I don't know.

[Zack] What I said about
there being no heroes...

She was right.

I think you might be one.

[sighs]
For testifying against you?
It was his idea.

[Zack] Good influence.

He's okay.

‐[door opens]
‐I know.

[indistinct chatter]

‐[chuckles]
‐Come, my little friend.

I need to revel.

What happened?

The judge says
I have to stay here‐‐

Oh, good!

And do 3,000 hours
of community service...

[journalists clamoring]

[theme music playing]

[theme music ends]