Picket Fences (1992–1996): Season 1, Episode 9 - Thanksgiving - full transcript

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GINNY: Fourth year in a row.
JIMMY: Yeah.

A new Rome record.

Okay, folks, folks, I need
you to crowd in a little
closer for me now, okay?

Come on.
It's gonna be great.

JIMMY: I sure thought
that Jill was gonna beat you

with her pumpkin pie
this year.

GINNY: No way. Sherril Saulter
sends me apples from Maine.

Sheriff Brock.

Could I have
a moment in private?

In my office.

KENNY: Come on, Ginny,
can I have a slice?
MAXINE: Can I have a piece?



GINNY: No,
it's for Thanksgiving.

MAN: Okay, just a couple more
candid shots looking festive,
all right?

Come on. Good.

JIMMY: What's up?

I came home early
from work last night.

Upset stomach.

Probably from tasting
my wife's cranberry sauce.

She likes to make
her own sauce,
you know.

I personally like
the jelly kind that comes
straight out of the can.

Uh-huh.

As I said,
I came home early,

and I found my wife
with Harold Lunster.

The two of them.
In my bed, naked.

Miriam and Harold?



Please, please,
don't picture it.
It's ugly.

I want to press charges.

What do you mean
you want to press charges?

Adultery is illegal,

chapter 944, section 16,
subsection number 1.

It is a crime
for a married person
to have intercourse

with a person
who is not her spouse.

It's an archaic law, Doug.

It is on the books.

I'll make a citizen's arrest
if you don't.

You want
the whole town to know?

Harold's telling
everybody anyway.

He ought to tell it
to the judge.

Doug,
tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

How can I...
I don't give a damn.

Do you expect me
to sit down at that table
and smile,

while she gums
her mashed potatoes,

pretending like
nothing's happened?

Adultery is a crime.

You arrest him.

Okay, big smiles.
Apple pie.

ALL: Apple pie.

Thanksgiving Day
and you're not having
dinner anywhere?

Can't.
I lost the office lottery.
I'm on duty.

You can't go to Lindsay's
just for dinner?

I'm the only one
manning the office.
I got to be here.

Kenny, Maxine.
Go pick up Miriam Wambaugh,
will you?

You're not actually
going to arrest her,
are you?

Yeah, well,
adultery is a crime,

and Wambaugh insists
on charges being brought.

You got to be kidding.
No, I'm not kidding.

Just pick up Miriam.

That'll give Wambaugh
the satisfaction of vengeance.

Then bring them both back,
and I'll make it go away.

Can I have a piece of that?

Illegal pie, Ginny.
Using apples from Maine.
That's cheating.

That's why Sherril sends them.
She lives to cheat.

So, you okay?

So, my father called.

He's not coming.
Oh, no, he's coming.

He'll be here around 4:00.

Jimmy, he's bringing
a lady friend.

Really?

Evidently he met her
six months ago at a
retired teachers' convention.

He says he wants
to introduce her
to the family.

Well, that's...
That's great.

Well, yeah, but my mother.
My God, she just died, what...

Eight years ago.

Now, Jill,
you have encouraged
your father to meet people.

I know. I know I have.
And I'm glad.

I'm thrilled.

But I just feel Thanksgiving
is a time for...

What?

Tell me I'm being silly.
You're being silly.

You're right.
It's wonderful he met someone.

And it's nice
she'll be spending
the holidays with us.

This is a good thing.

That's why I came over.
To share the good news.

You're having me arrested?

You committed a crime.

Take her.

You know something?

I have no remorse
for going to bed
with that man.

You being naked
is enough cause for remorse.

At least for anyone
who has to see it.

All right, Doug...

If you showed
the slightest interest...

You run for clients,
you run for mayor,
you run for headlines.

Just once you could
come running to me.

But I'm here
at the end of every day.

Taking me for granted.

Taking you for my wife.

Till death do us part.
My wife.

You go through
with this arrest,

you'll bring disgrace
upon yourself.

The whole town will talk.

This town can't
do anything to me

that you haven't
already done.

What do they do
with the turkey's head
after they chop it off?

It keeps pecking
for eight minutes.

Does not.

On 60 Minutes
they showed this turkey farmer

who fell into a tub
full of pecking heads.

Matthew.
Did not.

MATTHEW: It was 60 Minutes.
Anybody home?

ZACK: Grandpa!
Hey, look at them.

Don't attack me like that.
You're men now.

HAYDEN: Boy, look
how you've grown.

Did you bring presents?

No, I didn't
bring you presents.

You're not gonna
bilk me every holiday.

Hi, Grandpa.
Hello, sweetheart.

Hi, Daddy.
Hi, honey.

Where's your hot date?

Matthew.

Where is she?

Well, she's out in the car
bringing in some pies
and cakes and stuff.

I don't know what it is
about women and holidays.

This compulsion
to proffer food.

I heard that.

Suzanne, I'd like you to meet
my daughter, Jill.

It's great to meet you.

I'm very pleased to meet you.

That's his date?

And these are
my grandchildren. Kimberly.

Hi.
Hello.

And Zachary and Matthew.

Hi.
Hello.

Hi.

I just found out
that you just found out
I was coming.

I hope I didn't
throw your plans.

No, no.

No, we're thrilled.
This is wonderful.

Welcome to our home.
Welcome.

You can sleep
in our room, Dad.

Suzanne, I'm gonna put you
in the guest room.

It's at the end of the hall.

Well, where are you and Jimmy
gonna sleep?

Well, we can stay
with Matthew

and Matthew can
bunk with Zack.

Oh, no. I'm not...

No, it's fine. Really.

Kimberly,
will you show Suzanne
her room?

Everything's fine.
We have plenty of room.

Okay?
Okay.

Okay.

Okay. I'll get you
some towels. Okay?

What's wrong?

I didn't say anything
was wrong.

It's been a long time
since I've seen you
gulp so much saliva.

I presume it's to help you
swallow your thoughts.

Daddy, you've been dating
this girl for six months?

Why didn't you tell me?

I don't know.
It never came up.

Well, it could have
come up on the phone
this morning that she is...

What is she, 25?

Twenty-six.

Twenty-six.
Yeah.

You don't think
you could have warned me?

Warned you?
Well, informed me.
I mean...

The kids are gonna think
this is pretty strange.

I could have
explained this to them.

Explained what?

Oh, no, Daddy.
This is your game.

You want this
confrontation now.

This confrontation
that you're all ready for,
while I'm still in shock.

Shock over what?

Nope. I'm not gonna bite.
I'm gonna think about this.

I'm going to plan my thoughts

and then we're gonna
have this discussion.

There's nothing
left to discuss.

You've said everything
there is to say.

I haven't said anything.

You didn't have to.

Your expression
said it all for you.

The reason I didn't tell you
on the phone

is because I wanted
to see your face.

Now I've seen it.

Seen what?

Would you excuse me now
because I have to unpack.

We did not have intercourse.

You were thrashing
around naked,

what the hell
do you call it?

If it was with you,
I'd call it a miracle.

Put her in jail!
Doug, please sit down.

Please.

Now, Miriam,
I'm very disappointed.

Why Harold?

You're asking me why?

I'll tell you why.
He had a pulse.

JIMMY: Now, that's not nice.

All right, look,
since there's no
apparent consummation,

I'm not filing charges.

And this really is
something that should be
settled in the home.

Well, I'm not going home.
What?

I'm spending Thanksgiving
with my sister.

You can cook your own bird.

Am I free to go?

Yes.
Then I'm going.

DOUGLAS:
Tomorrow's Thanksgiving.

Doug, I told you
not to arrest her.

I'm going to be
alone on Thanksgiving.

I've never been
alone on Thanksgiving.

So you invited him
to eat with us?

Honey, you should have seen
how sad he looked.

Honey. Jimmy.

First my father
brings home this child.

Then you invite
Douglas Wambaugh.

This is gonna be
an awful Thanksgiving.

Actually, I thought
she was kind of nice.
Oh, yeah, she's nice.

She's a perfectly
nice 26-year-old.
He's 74, she's 26.

A perfectly nice 26.
Can you check her out?

What do you mean?
Run her through
your office computers.

(WOMAN MOANS)
I don't trust...
What was that?

What?
I heard something.

It sounded like a scream.

I didn't hear anything.

I don't hear anything.

Maybe Daddy's sick
or something.

I know I heard
some kind of yell.

I don't hear anything.

Oops.

Everything okay?
Fine.

Is everything okay here?
We're fine. Fine.

Good.
Good.

Good night.
Good night.

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Happy Thanksgiving.

Who the hell are you?
Douglas Wambaugh,
invited guest.

You must be the father.

It's 10:00 in the morning.

The day begins at dawn.

Thanksgiving should be enjoyed
from start to finish.

Jill. Jill.

I get to be
on your team, Dad.
Me, too.

You're gonna play football?

Yeah. If you can,
Pops, so can I.

Suzanne, I was wondering
if you'd mind skipping
the game

and helping me with dinner.

No. No, I'd love to.

We should all skip the game.

A holiday should
be spent right here
in the home.

Why aren't you in yours?

You're quite a character.
We're gonna hit it off.

Okay, let's go.

Wait a minute.
On second thought,
I think I will join you.

May I call you Hayden?
HAYDEN: No.

Okay. Where should we start?

Look, I appreciate that
both you and my father are
consenting adults,

but we have small children
in this house,

and I put you
in separate bedrooms
for a reason.

I'm sorry.

It was after 11
when I went in there.

Well, you were loud.

You might have woken them.

I'm sorry about that, too.

Should I peel
the potatoes now?

You know,
he had a coronary
three years ago.

Sex could kill him.

You really want to have
this discussion now?

No, I don't.
But given the decibel level
of your...

You were sweating
quite profusely.
I'm concerned for his health.

I'm speaking as a doctor now.

Well, Doctor,

your father's physician
advised him

that he should stay
on his back during
intercourse,

avoid the missionary position,

avoid ever getting up
on his hands...

I don't want to have
this discussion now.
Our conversation's over.

Have you shared
any of these feelings
with your father?

What I share with my father
is my business.

Well, evidently
it's your business alone

because he hasn't heard
anything from you.

Look, you can take salad duty
or JELL-O mold.

Take your pick.

I think I'll play football.

We have a feast
of football for you
this afternoon

with a classic NFC
Central Division match-up,

the Chicago Bears
against the Detroit Lions.

The Bears lead the Lions
by just one game
in the division...

Oh, hard at work, I see.

What are you doing here?

I felt bad for you,
so I brought you some food.

You can zap it
in the microwave later,
when you want to eat.

Wow. Thanks.

Yeah, well, you shouldn't
be eating bologna
on Thanksgiving, anyway.

What's this?

Football picks.

I got hammered
in the college games.

I need the Cowboys
to pull me even.

You bet with a bookie?

No, with Ginny.

Of course with a bookie.

This is illegal, Kenny.

You are a cop,
for God's sakes.

This is an illegal activity.

Do you have any idea
how prevalent organized
crime is?

Do you know
that people like you
perpetuate the mob

every time you make a bet?

It's football.
It's gambling.

It's Thanksgiving.

Can't you give up
being Supercop for one day?

I'm not Supercop.

Yeah, you are.

You got these
double-barrel sights
so bent on being sheriff,

you can't even be human.

I can be human.
I can be very human.

I was willing to let
the killer nun go, even.
I can be plenty human.

Max, remember
when you shot the Chopper,
and you were all upset

and you asked me
not to tell Jimmy
that I saw you crying?

Did you tell?
No, I didn't.

But so what if I did?

There's nothing wrong
with being a little weak
sometimes.

Do you have any idea
how hard it is to climb
the police ranks as a woman?

Oh, boy.
It's true.

If you're a male cop
and you cry that makes
you compassionate,

and you get a promotion.

If you're a woman cop
and you have a breakdown,

suddenly you're a basket case,

and you wind up
with desk duty.

All I'm saying is,
that you don't have to act
tough all the time.

You wonder
why you don't have
any boyfriends.

Don't change the subject.
I'm not changing the subject.

I'm talking about you
being Iron Lady.

That's why guys
never dare come
near you unless...

I get men.
Dates maybe.

But no relationships.

Unless you count
the three-day fling
with the midget.

Look who's talking.

The last person you gave
your heart to was
a nightclub-singing hooker.

The point is I gave my heart.

When was the last time
you ever let anybody even
see your insides?

Listen to Mr. Sensitivity.

I'm about to take
vulnerability lessons
from you.

Don't turn on me now.

You sleep with your gun
under a pillow.
Listen to yourself.

It's tough deputy Supercop.

I'm taking my turkey back.
I hope you have a great day.

Max.

Two. 22, 26.

Twenty-nine. 14. Three.

Come on, just say
"hike" for God's sake.

I'm reading the defense.

Hike!

(DOG BARKING)

I'm open. I'm open. Here.

Give it to me!

Son-of-a-bitch.
That's the third time
you hit me.

Crouch down.
You're too tall.

Can't you quarterback?
And who do I throw to?

You guys can't run.
Come here. Huddle up.
Huddle up.

I got a razzle dazzle
flea flicker that'll bust
this game open.

Who is this man?

DOUGLAS: Huddle up, huddle up.
Huddle up, Hayden.

So what do you think of her?

She seems great.
I like her.

You don't think
it's a little strange?

Well, if they want
to be together.
I don't know.

I'll tell you this much,

I can't remember the last time
I heard so much noise coming
out of your room.

Never mind.
What noise?

Never mind.
I didn't hear any noise.

DOUGLAS: All right!

Twenty-six, 26.
Pretty good age, Hayden?

Come on, hurry up. Hike!

Go! Go! Go!

Here. Here.

Son-of-a-bitch. Look...
Listen.

We need a new quarterback.

Kimberly. Hey, wait a minute.
Come here, Zack.

Yeah.
It just came off the computer.

Suzanne Russell.
Engaged 18 months ago
to Owen Seidel.

Eighty years old.
What happened to him?

Dead.

Heart attack
during intercourse.

She got everything
in the will.

HAYDEN: Come on. Listen.
We'll work out some plans.

That's what was
going on last night.
She was trying to kill him.

Look at this bed.

Jill, she wasn't
trying to kill him.

What, she was with
another 70-year-old
before the last one?

What happened to him?
I don't know.

God, this is all
starting to make sense,
honey.

She's no school teacher.

What's she doing
at a retired teachers'
convention?

She latches on to old men
with heart conditions

then intercourses
them to death.
Jill, will you calm...

Will you calm down?
Don't tell me to
calm down, Jimmy.

Did you see
how much she was
sweating last night?

They're having rigorous
sex in my bed.

Listen, Jill. Listen.
Daddy's got a weak heart.

Listen to me.

Now, I never will claim

to understand
your relationship
with your father.

I don't think you even
understand it.

But if you go downstairs

and drop
an accusation like this,
you'll have no hope for...

What am I supposed to do,
say nothing?
Yes.

Oh, honey, this woman...
Yeah. We have no
proof of anything.

Oh, well,
what do you want to do,

wait for a dead body, Sheriff,
so we have proof?

(GROANS)

For God's sake.
This is Thanksgiving Day!

All right, listen.

We have three kids down there

who just wanna
have a nice holiday dinner.

Let's just survive this, okay?
Have a nice family day.

(HAROLD SCREAMS)

DOUGLAS:
Why, you dirty home breaker.
I'll fix you. This is nothing.

The way you're going,
that's what you're gonna get.
The nerve.

Who is this?

JILL: Harold, are you okay?
Are you all right?

Matthew, what happened
down here?

Wambaugh flattened Harold.

I just meant to nick him.

I came to apologize,
he hits me with potatoes.

Your wife cheated
on you with him?

Harold, you...
You better go.

I'll go.

But can I say one thing?
No.

DOUGLAS: You've said enough.
Pass me the string beans.

I didn't mean
for it to happen.

I went there
to get her signature
on a petition.

There was music,

and she asked me
if I'd dance with her.

I thought it was
kind of funny,

but she said
she just needed to be held.

And she looked so sad, I...
I felt bad for her.

Is this supposed
to be poignant?

The man has potatoes
on his head.

I'm sorry, Doug.

I didn't mean
for it to happen.

But I think Miriam
is a very lonely lady.

You got to admit, Grandpa,
things happen around here.

They certainly do.

And in the wake
of this madness,

I guess now is
as appropriate a time
as ever.

Really?
Yeah.

Appropriate for what?

There's a reason
I wanted Suzanne
to meet this family.

I wanted her
to meet her family.

What are you talking about?

Suzanne and I are
going to be married.

To each other?

That's right, Zachary.

You've got yourself
a new grandma.

Kenny, you and I
should not be fighting.

So you brought me
the whole bird?

Well, they had more turkeys

than they knew what to do
with at Lindsay's house,

so I thought
I'd bring one over
and have dinner with you.

'Cause, you know,
I'm more comfortable
being in the office.

It makes me feel
closer to my work.

Which you know I love,
as Supercop.

So you want company or not?

What an occasion.

Let me say, Hayden,
how privileged I am
to share it with you.

I feel we've forged
a friendship.

I'd like to do the toast,
if it's okay.

I don't really know
this family yet,

but I'm looking forward
to getting to know you more.

Going shopping with Kimberly

and playing more football
with Matthew and Zack.

And, Jill, well, who knows?

Maybe your father and I
will give you the sister
you never had.

That does it.
All right, Daddy, upstairs.

What?
We have to talk.

Boys, go to your rooms.
What did we do?

Just do as I tell you.
Daddy, upstairs now.

How dare you
blow into this house
with a woman a third your age,

make love to her in my bed,

and then before
we've even had a chance
to consider...

Don't speak to me like that.

You are 74 years old.
You're a grandfather.

You have responsibilities
to those grandchildren,

which does not involve
shocking them with behavior...

They didn't seem shocked.
You look shocked.

Look, Daddy,
I know our relationship
has problems...

What relationship?

We see each other
six times a year.

I blow out birthday candles,
I read the kids
bedtime stories,

and I hang around
long enough to fill out
their well-balanced lives.

Well, forgive me for living.

Forgive me for aspiring
to be something more
than texture

for your holiday household.

I never said
you couldn't have a life.

No, so long as it doesn't
screw up yours.

Now, you listen to me.
No, you listen to me!

How dare you judge me.
How dare you judge her.

JILL: Daddy, this isn't
about judging you...

I never heard Grandpa
yell at Mom before.

You know
why you didn't hear
about Suzanne?

Because we don't talk, Jill.
We don't talk.

Well, I call you every Sunday,
for God's sakes.

Oh, yes, yes.
And you say nothing,
and you ask nothing.

My God.
When you were in college
we used to talk every day.

You could spend 45 minutes

telling me about
a book you'd read

or about a conversation
you had.

Now you can nutshell
your whole week

into a four-minute
Sunday phone call,

"Hi, Dad. How you doing, Dad?
Let me put the kids on, Dad.

"Love you, Dad."
You call that a relationship?

Damn it,
that's not fair, Daddy.
I have been there for you.

When you had
your heart attack,
when Mama died.

You've been dutiful,
perfunctory.
You went fetal for a month.

You don't enjoy
my company, Jill.
You haven't for 15 years.

That's not true.
That's not true!
It is true!

You know it's true.
Don't lie to me.

I know your face. Remember?

I know your face.

You know what you said
about me not wanting people
to see my insides?

Mr. Dreeb said the same thing.

You know why
I broke it off with him
so fast?

He was a midget.
This is good.

Yeah, that was part of it.

But I felt myself
starting to care.

It scared me.

You let yourself care,
you get hurt.

That kind of defense,
you get lonely, Max.

I'm not lonely.
I don't get lonely.

I mean, sure,
I could be happier.

But I'm pretty happy now.
Why give up the control?

HAYDEN: You know,
when you were growing up,

I'd come home
from work and I'd...

I'd see your eyes.

They'd well up with joy
at the sight of me

like there was
some special magic
in my company.

I cherish that look
in your eyes, Jill.

It was the most precious thing
I could call my own.

But it's not there anymore.

Oh, I'm sure it is for Jimmy
and the kids, but...

And I know you love me.

But you don't really
care to be with me.

One of the reasons
I married Miriam was
that she was ugly.

Not that I was such a bargain
back in those days.

But I figured
my best shot at fidelity is
to marry an ugly girl.

And boy did
Miriam fit the bill.

In fact, she had a bill.

To think that two people can
live together for so long

and in an instant
become strangers.

I have tried to
keep you in my life, Daddy.
I've been desperate to.

You've tried to keep me
as foundation, Jill.

As paternal bedrock
to build your life on.

Well,
let me tell you something.
My life goes on, too.

I may be in my seventies,
but my life goes forward, too.

Oh, really?
With a 26-year-old?

Do you really think
that's moving forward?

I'm sorry you can't
accept that.

But I'm more alive being
Suzanne's future than I am
being your past.

Well, there's something
you should know
about Suzanne, Daddy.

That's what this is about?
That my last husband died?

Look, it does
raise a question.

Before that guy, you were with
still another senior citizen.

What did you do,
contact the FBI?

Look,
that's her father up there.
It's my father-in-law.

You're a young lady.

Look, I understand
your not trusting me.
You don't know me.

But what about him?

You don't trust him
to choose the company
he keeps?

What kind of family are you?

A concerned family.

You think
I'm trying to wrangle
my way into his will

so I can give him
a post-coital coronary.

Look, tell me this.
Does he know about
your past record?

Does he know
about your previous husband?

What happened to him?

Of course I knew about it.
Hell, that's one thing
we had in common.

We'd both lost a spouse.
And you didn't
have any doubts?

The girl attends
retired peoples' conventions.

Whatever doubts I had,
I resolved by addressing
them with her.

Something you and I
used to be able to do.

All I'm saying is
this woman is obviously not...

This woman is going
to be my wife.

This woman and I
share a trust.

Something you and I
obviously do not.

Damn you. Damn you.

DOUGLAS: The thing
about parents and kids,

one day you wake up,
the parent is no longer
a parent,

the child is no longer
a child.

They don't know what to say
and how to behave.

And they just pretend
that nothing's changed.

Then 20 years later,
they don't know how to talk.

What's going on?

Go and pack,
we're leaving.

I don't think
that's gonna solve
a hell of a lot.

Go and pack.

All right, out.
It's my turn to talk.

No, Suzanne,
I don't want to...

Look, if you want
my things packed,
you go pack them.

Jimmy, I'm sorry.

I know this is your house
and your room,
but you get out, too.

Okay,
I'm sure that little session
was wonderfully cathartic.

This is all about me,
basically.

Here I am.
At least have the guts
to come at me face to face.

Well, right now I have
more guts than manners, lady,
so you be careful.

I'm right in front
of you, Jill.

That doesn't mean I know
who or what the hell you are.

You run around
with budding octogenarians...

I don't like younger men.
Younger men have ambition.

They're consumed with careers.

They're so busy doing
rather than just being.

They don't have wills.

You're either
a little too blinded
by concern for your father,

or you're a narrow-minded,
selfish...

What the hell
do you have in common
with a 74-year-old man?

A belief, maybe,
that life isn't meant
to be planned

so much as experienced
and shared.

Oh, my.
Aren't you just profound
beyond your years.

Live for today.
That's a sure-fire line
in the geriatric set.

You probably...
Jill!

I have cystic fibrosis.

So look on the bright side.

You may hate this marriage,
but at least it won't
last too long.

Does my father know?

Well, he knows
I have a pulmonary disease,
but...

No, he doesn't know.

For God's sakes.

How can you let
a man marry you when...

My symptoms aren't acute.

If it worsens,
of course I'll tell him.

Right now, I'm not
even that symptomatic.

There's a chance
I'll outlive him any...

There's no cure yet
for cystic fibrosis.

The average survival
age is 29.

Look at me. I'm strong.

There is a cure
just around the corner.

People are living
longer and longer.

There's a real chance
that you'll die soon.

If you want to deny that,
that's fine.

I would even say
that's healthy.

How can you
deny that to the man
who's planning to marry you?

KENNY: I got nothing against
you being independent, Max.

I think it's good.

But if you're alone
on a holiday
and you don't feel empty,

at least a little,
I think something's wrong.

I'm not saying
I never get lonely.

I'm just saying you shouldn't
get into a relationship

just because you hate
drinking eggnog by yourself.

What about sex?

You don't miss sex?

I have a sex life, thank you.

Sort of.

Well, I don't figure you
for someone who has sex
outside of a relationship,

and since you're not involved
with anybody,

any sex you're having
is probably ambidextrous.

Well, it's safe.

What about you?

I don't want to talk
about this.

Come on, Kenny, this is good.

This is human talk.
This is vulnerable stuff.

I'm not being Supercop.

Can I ask you something?

I don't know.

Well, I know
there's nothing between us,
and there can't be

because we work together.

And because we're not
each other's type.

I mean,
stop me if I'm wrong.

Keep going.

Yeah.

Well, sometimes I wonder...

I mean,
you and I aren't
bad-looking people.

When you're having sex
and there's nobody else there,

do you ever think of me?

Do you ever think about me?

I asked you first.

Then you answer first.
Do you ever think about me?

Maybe. A couple of times.

When you were thinner.

What about you?

With me.
Once.

Just once?
I don't commit.

How was I?

So she's telling him now?

They're in Zack's room.
I told her that she tells him
or I do.

I'm not about to have
him marry somebody
who's terminal,

just to have him
destroyed by...

Oh, I can't believe all this.

How terminal is she?
Well, she's 26.

That's...
That's old for somebody
with cystic fibrosis.

What exactly is it,
cystic fibrosis?

It's a genetic disorder
that affects the lungs
and the glands.

That's why she was
sweating so much
last night when she...

I don't know
whether to feel worse
for him or for her.

I just can't think anymore.

(SOBBING)

As far as I can tell,
Mom and Dad are in their room,

Grandpa and Suzanne
are in yours,

and Kimberly's still
with Wambaugh.

Do you think
it's safe to go out?

I don't know.
It's real quiet.

I don't hear anybody laughing.

I'm starving.

We're gonna eat.
Don't worry.

Everything's gonna be okay.

When do you think we'll eat?

I don't know.

If they keep
fighting like this...
Nobody's fighting.

I can hear it.

Will you shut up, Zack?

I keep telling you
it doesn't mean anything.

Grown-ups can yell
at each other. So what.

It doesn't mean anything.

Douglas?

Is anybody home?

What do you want?
You're not welcome here.

MIRIAM: Come down here.

Don't you tell me
what to do.

Excuse me, Suzanne?

You were right.
It did make a difference.

I'm leaving.

I'm sorry.

Sorry that I caught you.

Sorry that I did it.
Glad that I got caught.

Glad that I caught
some attention.

We're senior citizens,
Miriam.

All we're supposed
to do is eat, sleep
and watch TV together.

We're not expected
to notice one another.

Stop with the Wambaugh humor,
will you, please?

I need attention.

And I need loyalty.
Loyalty, Miriam.

I demand nothing more
and nothing less.

Who's in the kitchen,
now, Jimmy?

I hear somebody.
I'll see.

Miriam Wambaugh
has dropped by.
Oh, God.

Excuse me.

Daddy.

Mom, can Zack and I
send out for pizza?

BOTH: No.

"Till death do us part,"
Miriam.

Till death do us part.

Love and honor.
Those are the words
in that vow.

There's nothing in that oath
about Harold Lunster.

Cherish was in that vow,
too, Douglas.

What's so wrong
about me being cherished?

In 42 years
there's never been a minute
that I haven't cherished you.

Maybe once in a while

we could be romantic?

Well, if you give me notice.
At least two days.

(DOG BARKING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

Dad.

I'm so sorry.

What did you say to her?

That I still wanted
to marry her.

That it didn't matter.

Well, why...
Why is she leaving?

Because she knows my face.

How's that for irony?

She said she could tell
from my face
that it does matter.

Is she right?

When your mother died,
so did I for the longest time.

It was years before
I was even functional.

I don't think
I could survive that kind
of destruction again.

I can't go through
with marrying her.

See, the thing about
Suzanne is that

something tells me

that the love I have for her
now is only a fraction
of what it will become.

I'm just scared that if I...

If I let myself love her
any more than...

I just don't think
I could face life
without her.

Well, then face it with her.

I know... I know I'm not much
for continuity today, Daddy.

But you've accused me
of being

perfunctory,
condescending, what?

Obligatory...
I never said condescending.

Look, let's just try
some honesty, all right?

Then maybe we can
save what's left
of our relationship.

I think you're
a narrow-minded, pig-headed,
old fart sometimes,

who can't see the forest
for the trees.

But you've never been stupid.

And if you let that woman
walk out of here just because
you love her too much,

then you're the dumbest man
I ever met.

How long has she got to live?
Three years at the most?

She has a day,
and she has another day
after that.

Another day after that,
another day after that.

She has a lifetime.

She wants to spend it
with you.

You love her.

She loves you.
That's... That's everything.

(DOOR CLOSES)

Dinner will be on the table
in half an hour.

I hope that you
both will join us.

It's not that simple.

No, it's never simple.

God, I'm stuffed.

I ate too much.

That's the point, isn't it?

Yeah, but, I'd like to be
a little thinner.

Make it easier for you later.

You jerk.

That was
a private conversation.

I ain't gonna tell anybody.

No, you better not.

Hey, Max.

Have you heard
of the New Year's Eve rule?

What's that?

New Year's Eve.
You're allowed
to kiss anybody.

No strings,
no suggestions or nothing.

Just a kiss
to satisfy the curiosity,
nothing more.

Oh.

Nope. Never heard of that.

Nothing's ever gonna happen
between us, let's face it.

But it's Thanksgiving night

and actually,
we're getting close to
Jewish New Year, aren't we?

I don't know.

Aren't you at least curious?

Actually, no.

You see, I know
exactly what it would be like.

Both of us would
be scared to death

of appearing
to be more into it
than the other,

so the kiss itself would be
incredibly tentative.

Just very, very soft.

Our lips would barely touch.

They'd just sort of rest
up against each other.

And then one of us,

probably you,

would use your bottom lip
to lift up the other
person's upper lip,

probably mine, and then

maybe our tongues
would touch a little,

but it would be
so slight that...

That what?

See? I told you.

Kenny?

Happy New Year.

You, too.

Somebody say grace.
I'm starved.

You hold your horses,
young man.

We really should start,
Jimmy.

The marshmallow on the yams
is starting to crust over.

All right, all right.
I'm gonna say grace now.

Everybody bow their head.

Hey, hey.
Hold it, for God's sake.

Don't you wait
till everybody's at the table?

Who's that?

It's my buddy, Hayden.

I think he's going
to ask me to be
in his wedding.

I'd sooner chew off
my own fingers.

He's a character.
Of course.

Come on, sit down.

How the hell do you
eat Thanksgiving dinner
in the kitchen?

You just squeeze in,
that's all.

Everybody's got to make
a little room for everyone.

Come on, now. Come on.
Our food's gonna get cold.

Go ahead, go ahead,
go ahead.

Come on, hurry up.
People are hungry.

For what we receive,
for what we have,

thanks.

Thanks.

Amen.

Amen.