Nathan for You (2013–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - Nathan for You - full transcript

Nathan tries to help a struggling haunted house. He also attempts to overcome his fear of the opposite sex by dating ten women at once.

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- MY NAME IS NATHAN FIELDER,
AND I GRADUATED FROM

ONE OF CANADA'S
TOP BUSINESS SCHOOLS

WITH REALLY GOOD GRADES.

NOW I'M USING MY KNOWLEDGE
TO HELP STRUGGLING

SMALL BUSINESS OWNERS MAKE IT
IN THIS COMPETITIVE WORLD.

THIS IS NATHAN FOR YOU.

THERE'S NOTHING PEOPLE LIKE MORE
THAN BEING SCARED.

- WELL, YEAH, I LIKE MY--
- WOAH!

- OH, MY GOD.

- THAT'S WHY,
WHEN OCTOBER SWINGS AROUND,

HAUNTED HOUSES
ARE BIG BUSINESS.



BRUCE STANTON IS THE OWNER
OF REIGN OF TERROR,

AN ANNUAL HAUNTED HOUSE
IN THOUSAND OAKS, CALIFORNIA.

- WE HAVE A PERFECT ENVIRONMENT
TO SET YOU UP TO BE SCARED.

- BUT AFTER TAKING
A WALK-THROUGH

OF THE SUPPOSEDLY
SCARY MANSION,

I CAME OUT
LESS THAN IMPRESSED.

HI.

SO I TALKED TO BRUCE
ONE ON ONE ABOUT AN IDEA I HAD

TO HELP HIS BUSINESS.

WHAT IS THE BEST PRESS
A HAUNTED HOUSE CAN GET?

- THAT IT'S SO SCARY,
SOMEONE PEED THEIR PANTS.

- NO.

PEE IS ONE THING.

I WANT YOUR HAUNTED HOUSE
TO BE SO SCARY



THAT SOMEONE SUES YOU
FOR BEING TOO SCARY.

- I DON'T KNOW THAT
WE WANT PEOPLE TO SUE US.

- IF THE REIGN OF TERROR
WAS SUED FOR BEING TOO SCARY,

THAT NEWS WOULD
ATTRACT THRILL-SEEKERS

FROM AROUND THE WORLD.

THE PLAN, GET CUSTOMERS TO SUE
BY MAKING THEM THINK

THAT THEY'RE
REALLY GOING TO DIE.

- NO, BECAUSE I THINK
THAT WILL BE GOING TOO FAR.

- WELL, YOUR CURRENT APPROACH
COULD GET PRESS TOO.

- YES.

- BY BEING THE WORLD'S
LEAST SCARY HAUNTED HOUSE.

- UH, I DON'T THINK THAT'S
THE APPROACH WE WANT, BUT--

- WELL, THAT'S THE APPROACH
IT SEEMS LIKE

YOU'RE CURRENTLY TAKING.

- NO, WE ARE A SCARY--

- "REIGN OF TERROR.
WHERE PUSSIES GO TO RELAX."

- OH, OKAY.

- OR, "REIGN OF TERROR,
YOU'RE PROBABLY GOING TO DIE."

- YOU MEAN IN THE HAUNTED HOUSE,
WE PAINT A PICTURE

THAT THEIR DEATH IS...
IMMINENT.

- YES.
- OKAY.

- TO SCARE PEOPLE ENOUGH
THAT THEY WOULD SUE,

I EXPLAINED TO BRUCE THAT
WE NEEDED TO CONVINCE CUSTOMERS

THEY SOMEHOW CONTRACTED
A DISEASE THEY'RE LIKELY

TO DIE FROM.

BRUCE RELUCTANTLY AGREED
TO LET ME TRY IT OUT FOR A DAY.

AND AFTER A WEEK OF PREPARATION,
MY ACTORS WERE READY.

IT WAS TIME FOR PEOPLE TO ENTER
THE WORLD'S SCARIEST

HAUNTED HOUSE.

WELL, THANKS FOR COMING
TO THE REIGN OF TERROR.

- OH, WE'RE EXCITED, MAN.
- YOU'RE EXCITED?

- YEAH, MAN.

- I HAVE TO WARN YOU
BEFORE YOU GO IN.

- OH, DANG.

- THIS HAUNTED HOUSE
IS EXTREMELY SCARY.

- I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.
- ARE YOU SURE?

- YEAH.

- ALL RIGHT, WELCOME
TO THE REIGN OF TERROR.

- YOU FIRST.

- OOH...

- MOMMY.
- HELLS....

- YOU'RE MY MOMMY.

- SORRY, ONE SEC.
WHAT? WHO?

WHO? HER?
- YEAH.

- SORRY, CAN YOU
COME WITH ME FOR A SEC?

SORRY, GUYS.

WERE YOU GUYS SCARED IN THERE?
- YEAH.

- SO SORRY, DID SHE
TOUCH YOU BY ANY CHANCE?

OR WAS THERE A--

- UM, I THINK SHE PROBABLY
TOUCHED MY NECK.

- MOMMY!

- LIKE, I USUALLY
WEAR MY GLASSES

AND THIS TIME I DIDN'T,
AND I OVERSHOT THE GRAB

AND I WAS SUPPOSED
TO NOT TOUCH YOU.

- WAIT, SORRY, JUST--
- SORRY.

- CAN YOU GUYS
WAIT IN HERE ONE SEC?

- YEAH.
- SORRY, ONE SECOND.

- WHAT IS IT CALLED?
- IT'S CALLED KLEIN'S DISEASE.

AND IT'S AN IMMUNITY--
- KLEIN DISEASE?

- KLEIN'S DISEASE.
- SO WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

- SHE HAS AN AUTO-IMMUNE THING.

SHE WORRIED WHEN
SHE TOUCHED YOU,

SHE TRANSMITTED
SOMETHING TO YOU.

- MM-HM.

- SO DON'T GET FREAKED OUT
OR ANYTHING,

BUT I CALLED AN AMBULANCE.

PARAMEDICS ARE JUST
COMING TO MAKE SURE.

THEY'LL LOOK AT YOU,
IT'S JUST PRECAUTIONARY.

SO JUST HOLD TIGHT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

- NO PROBLEM.

- I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME
IN THE HAUNTED HOUSE.

SORRY ABOUT THIS.
- IT'S ALL GOOD.

- HEY, GUYS.
- HEY.

- UH, JUST IN HERE.

- DO YOU HAVE ANY CUTS
OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT?

- I DON'T THINK SO.
I DON'T LOOK BACK THERE A LOT.

- OKAY, DO YOU MIND
IF I JUST--

WE SHOULD DEFINITELY
GET HER CHECKED OUT, IF THAT'S--

- YEAH.
- "CHECKED OUT" IN WHAT WAY?

- LIKE, AT A HOSPITAL
WITH A DOCTOR FOR SURE,

FOR KLEIN'S.

- TO MY KNOWLEDGE, IT'S
A DISEASE THAT'S PRETTY SERIOUS.

BASICALLY, IF YOU'VE GOT A CUT,
AND YOU'RE TOUCHED,

AND YOU HAVE ANY SORT
OF OPEN WOUND OR ANYTHING THAT,

YOU KNOW, TOUCHED AN ORIFICE--
YOUR EYE, YOUR MOUTH,

OR ANYTHING THAT'S OPEN
OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.

- JEEZ.
- YEAH.

IT CAN BE CONTRACTED, SO--

- IS THIS, LIKE, AIDS?
IS IT, LIKE--WORSE?

- WELL, IT IS AN IMMUNE
DEFICIENCY DISEASE.

- YEAH?

OKAY.
- WHAT'S THAT MEAN?

- HOW ARE WE DOING?

- AT THIS TIME
IT'S A PRECAUTIONARY MEASURE.

THAT'S ALL IT IS.

IT'S A FIRST STAGE,
WE'RE GONNA HAVE YOU

CHECKED OUT
RIGHT HERE, OKAY?

- ARE YOU A DOCTOR?
- YEAH.

- ARE YOU A DOCTOR?
- I AM A DOCTOR, YES.

I NEED HER TO COME OUTSIDE
WITH ME, AND WE'RE GONNA MOVE ON

TO ANOTHER STAGE
WHERE THERE'S MORE DOCTORS.

- WHY ARE YOU WEARING THIS SUIT?
IS IT SERIOUS?

- IT'S FOR MY--YES, SIR,
IT IS SERIOUS, PLEASE.

- NO! WHAT IS GOING ON?
WE ALL HAVE THIS!

IF HE'S WEARING THIS,
WE ALL HAVE IT.

- I UNDERSTAND THAT.
- WHAT IS THIS THING?

- SIR--
- IT'S FOR MY SAFETY.

- WHY DON'T WE
HAVE WHAT HE HAS?

NO! WHY DOES HE
HAVE A BIOHAZARD SUIT?

- NO, WAIT.
HOLD ON, HOLD ON.

- NO, NO, NO.
- HOLD ON, HOLD ON.

SHE'S NOT GOING NOWHERE
'TILL YOU EXPLAIN, MAN,

WHAT'S GOING ON, MAN.

- YEAH!
- WHAT'S GOING ON?

SHE'S NOT GOING NOWHERE.
LOOK, SHE'S TOUCHING ME.

- WE'RE GONNA
WALK RIGHT OUTSIDE.

LET'S WALK RIGHT OUTSIDE.
- OKAY.

- I JUST WANT AN EXPLANATION,
THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING FOR.

- ALL RIGHT.
- NICE.

- HOPE YOU GUYS
ENJOYED THE HAUNTED HOUSE.

- YOU GUYS ENJOY IT IN THERE?

- THAT WAS DIFFERENT.
- WOW.

- THAT WAS DIFFERENT?
- I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT.

- THIS RIGHT HERE IS A LAWYER.
- HELLO.

- PETER--
- PETER.

- PETER MARX.
- MO.

- MO. AND YOU ARE?
- I'M MIRA.

- MIRA.

- SO IF YOU FOUND
THE HAUNTED HOUSE TOO SCARY,

AND YOU WANT TO PRESS
ANY LEGAL ACTION

AGAINST THE HAUNTED HOUSE,
HE CAN TALK TO YOU--

- WE CAN TALK AND SEE--
UNDER THE LAW,

YOU HAVE CLAIMS FOR WHAT WE CALL
"INTENTIONAL INFLICTION

OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS."

OR EVEN "NEGLIGENT INFLICTION
OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS."

I DON'T WANT TO CREATE PROBLEMS
THAT DON'T EXIST,

BUT IF YOU HAVE THOSE CONCERNS,
FEEL FREE TO CALL ME.

BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO,

IT'S ONLY IF YOU'RE
COMFORTABLE ABOUT IT.

- AFTER RUNNING
SEVERAL MORE CUSTOMERS

THROUGH MY VERSION
OF THE HAUNTED HOUSE--

- HEY, MOM, IT'S JORDAN.

UM, ACTUALLY I HAVE
TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL.

THERE WAS SOMEBODY
WITH A DISEASE.

- NOW, I'M NOT TRYING
TO CREATE A LAWSUIT HERE,

I JUST--YOU HAVE CERTAIN RIGHTS
UNDER CALIFORNIA LAW.

- I PAID BRUCE A VISIT
TO FOLLOW UP.

WHAT DID YOU THINK?

- WELL, I THINK IT'S COMPLETELY
IMPRACTICAL FOR A HAUNTED HOUSE.

- BUT PEOPLE WERE SCARED.

- YEAH, I DON'T KNOW,
I COULDN'T TELL.

- WE HAD A LAWYER
THERE AT THE EXIT THAT THINKS,

YOU KNOW, SOME PEOPLE
MIGHT HAVE A CASE.

PETER?
DO YOU WANNA COME IN?

- HELLO.
- HI, THIS IS BRUCE.

- PETER.
- HE RUNS THE HAUNTED HOUSE.

- NICE TO MEET YOU.

SO SOME OF THESE PEOPLE
HAVE A CASE, RIGHT?

- WELL, SOME OF THEM
WERE A LITTLE APPREHENSIVE

AND I'M NOT TRYING TO GET YOU
IN A LOT OF TROUBLE--

- BUT YOU WANT TO SUE.

- I WANT TO SUE FOR
LEGITIMATE CLAIMS, ABSOLUTELY.

- AND THIS IS
A LEGITIMATE CLAIM?

- WELL, IT COULD BE.
AND, UH, WE'LL SEE.

- ALL RIGHT.
- ALL RIGHT, THANKS SO MUCH.

- ALL RIGHT.

- WELL, I'M GLAD I--
YOU KNOW, COULD HAVE HELPED

AND DONE THIS FOR YOU.

- TOOK A GOOD
HAUNTED HOUSE AND...

NOT MADE IT ANY BETTER.
OKAY.

- WELL, I'M TRYING
TO GET YOU PRESS.

- OKAY.

- IN THE END, THE SCARIEST THING
ABOUT THE HAUNTED HOUSE

WAS BRUCE'S TERRIBLE MANNERS.

BUT WHEN SOMEONE'S RUDE TO YOU,
YOU CAN'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY.

YOU JUST HAVE
TO KEEP GOING.

- WHEN YOU LOOK AT ME,
YOU PROBABLY SEE A GUY

WHO HAS IT ALL.

BUT REALLY, THERE'S A LARGE
PART OF ME THAT'S IMMATURE

AND UNDER-DEVELOPED.

ESPECIALLY WHEN
IT COMES TO WOMEN.

EVERY GIRL I LIKED GROWING UP
REJECTED ME.

AND BECAUSE OF THAT,
I'VE GROWN INTO A MAN

WHO'S CHRONICALLY
NERVOUS AROUND WOMEN.

I'M AN EMOTIONAL MIDGET.

NOW, IF SOMEONE CAME TO ME
WITH THIS PROBLEM,

I'D SUGGEST IMMERSION THERAPY,
WHERE YOU OVERWHELM YOURSELF

WITH YOUR FEAR IN ORDER
TO OVERCOME IT.

SO TONIGHT,
TO INSPIRE YOU,

I'M GOING TO ATTEMPT TO OVERCOME
MY FEAR OF THE OPPOSITE SEX

BY DATING NOT ONE,
BUT TEN WOMEN AT THE SAME TIME.

WISH ME LUCK.

I NEEDED TO GET TEN WOMEN
TO AGREE TO DATE ME,

SO I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE EASY
TO START WITH SOMEONE

I WORK WITH.

SO...

YOU KNOW HOW I'M DOING
THE THING ON THE SHOW

WHERE I'M DATING, LIKE,
TEN WOMEN AT THE SAME TIME?

- YEAH.

- ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP
RIGHT NOW?

- YES.
- OKAY.

- UM...

- SO--SORRY, NEVER MIND.
I WAS STUPID TO ASK.

IT DIDN'T WORK,
AND I KNEW FROM EXPERIENCE

THAT WOMEN JUST WOULDN'T
STOP AND TALK TO ME

WITHOUT AN EXCUSE.

SO I FOUND ONE.

EXCUSE ME, WOULD YOU
LIKE TO TRY OUR NEW

BLUEBERRY-RASPBERRY SMOOTHIE?

COME ON, JUST ONE?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY
ONE OF OUR NEW

RASPBERRY-BLUEBERRY SMOOTHIES?

UH, I'M JUST
KIDDING, ACTUALLY.

I DON'T WORK HERE.
MY NAME'S NATHAN.

I'M JUST DOING THIS
AS A WAY TO BREAK THE ICE

AND SHOW MY PERSONALITY.

- OH.

- I'M JUST TRYING
TO MEET PEOPLE AND--

NO.

I'M JUST DRINKING
MY OWN SMOOTHIE

THAT I BOUGHT FROM HERE.

BUT I LIKE DRINKING MY SMOOTHIE
OUT OF LITTLE CUPS ON A TRAY.

THAT'S HOW I LIKE
TO DRINK MY SMOOTHIE.

OKAY, WELL I THINK I'M ALLOWED
TO DRINK MY SMOOTHIE

WHEREVER I WANT.

- YOU NEED TO MOVE THIS.

- HEY!
- YOU NEED TO MOVE THIS.

- YOU CANNOT TOUCH MY TRAY,
THAT IS CRAZY.

THE SMOOTHIE THING
WAS TOO GIMMICKY ANYWAYS,

AND IT FELT THE SAME WAY
WHEN I USED A CUTE DOG.

DO YOU LIKE MY DOG?
- YEAH.

- SAY HI.
- HI.

- BUT JUST WHEN
I WAS READY TO QUIT,

IT HIT ME.

I HAD A MAJOR GIRL MAGNET
AT MY DISPOSAL

THAT I WAS TOTALLY IGNORING.

A TELEVISION CREW.

IT WAS A CRAZY IDEA,
BUT MAYBE WOMEN WOULD DATE ME

JUST FOR THE OPPORTUNITY
TO BE ON TV.

I HAD MY SOLUTION.

I WAS GOING TO CREATE
A FAKE REALITY SHOW

IN WHICH TEN WOMEN WOULD VIE
FOR THE HEART OF ONE MAN.

ME.

IT WOULD BE CALLED
THE HUNK.

IT TOOK WEEKS TO PREPARE
AS WE SORTED THROUGH

THE COUNTLESS SUBMISSIONS
FROM WOMEN TO MY ONLINE AD.

OH, I LIKE HER.

BUT PRETTY SOON WE SELECTED
THE TEN WOMEN I WOULD NEED,

HIRED A HOST,
AND RENTED A MANSION.

NO ONE KNEW MY SHOW
WAS FAKE, NOT EVEN THE HOST.

AND IT WAS
ABOUT TO BEGIN.

- I'M ANTHONY NAPOLI.

TONIGHT, TEN WOMEN
WILL GATHER IN THIS HOUSE

TO VIE FOR THE HEART
OF ONE MAN.

WILL THEY FIND LOVE?
WILL THEY FIND THEIR SOUL MATE?

I'M ANTHONY NAPOLI.
THIS IS THE HUNK.

- HI.
- YOU READY, NATHAN?

- UH, YEAH.
YEAH, I THINK SO.

- A LITTLE BIT NERVOUS?
- UM, KINDA, YEAH.

- WELL, IT'S TIME
TO MEET THE WOMEN.

- WHERE--WHAT
ARE YOU GONNA DO?

- I'M GONNA STAND HERE,
AND I'M GONNA INTRODUCE YOU

TO ALL THE WOMEN.

- COULD YOU MAYBE,
UM, BE INSIDE FOR THAT?

- I'LL HAVE--

- JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE
VERY HANDSOME COMPARED TO ME.

- I UNDERSTAND THAT, NATHAN--
- COULD YOU BE INSIDE?

- I'LL HAVE TO BE HERE.

- IF YOU'RE NEXT TO ME,

THEY'RE GONNA
LOVE YOU MORE THAN--

- NATHAN, YOU'RE THE HUNK,
I'M THE HOST.

- WOMEN MUST LOVE YOU, RIGHT?
- EH...

- YES?
- I GUESS THEY DO.

- HOW MANY WOMEN
HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH?

- EH...

NOT THAT MANY.

- HAVE YOU EVER HAD A THREESOME?
- I HAVE, YES.

- OKAY, SO--YEAH,
GO INSIDE, PLEASE.

- WOULD YOU--YOU WOULD
LIKE ME TO STEP INSIDE?

- YEAH. YOU CAN'T
BE OUT HERE AT ALL.

- NO, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
- OKAY, CAN YOU GO INSIDE?

- SURE.
- OKAY. THANK YOU.

I REALIZED TOO LATE
THAT HIRING A HANDSOME HOST

WAS A BAD IDEA.

BUT EVEN WITH TONY IN THE HOUSE,
WHEN THE WOMEN ARRIVED,

I GOT SUPER-NERVOUS.

- HI, I'M EMILY.
NICE TO MEET YOU.

- OH, NATHAN.
NICE TO MEET YOU.

- NICE TO MEET YOU.
- YEAH.

- SO EXCITING.
- YEAH. IT IS, HUH?

- YEAH.
- YEAH.

- THIS IS FUN.

- YEAH.

- YEAH.
- TOTALLY, UM...

- UM...

- IT WAS SO NICE TO MEET YOU.
- YEAH, OKAY.

- THANKS.

- UM, DO YOU WANT TO GO--
WE COULD TALK MORE AFTER.

- YEAH, SURE.
- YEAH, JUST--

- ALL RIGHT, COOL.

- FOR THE FIRST BIT,
JUST SAYING HI.

- YEAH.

- EVEN THOUGH
I WAS NERVOUS AT FIRST--

- I LOVE A MAN
IN A GOOD SUIT.

- OH, OKAY.
- MM-HM.

- THAT'S NICE.

AS I MET MORE AND MORE
OF THE WOMEN,

I FOUND MY CONFIDENCE GROWING.

WE HAVE SNACKS INSIDE
AND STUFF, TOO.

WE EAT PRETTY GOOD.
- AWESOME.

- THIS WAS ALL SO COOL, 'CAUSE
IT WAS JUST LIKE THE BACHELOR.

- I REALLY LIKE GUYS WHO HAVE
BLACK HAIR AND WHITE SKIN.

IT'S, LIKE, MY--
- YOU DON'T LIKE, UH--

- BLONDS?
- LIKE BLACK GUYS, OR--

- UM, I JUST--

- WELL, WE'LL TALK MORE INSIDE.
- OKAY.

- I HAD NEVER HAD THIS MUCH
ATTENTION IN MY LIFE,

AND THE ONLY THING
I HAD TO DO TO ATTRACT THEM

WAS TO CREATE A FAKE SHOW.

THE LOGIC DIDN'T
REALLY MAKE SENSE TO ME,

BUT IT WAS WORKING,

AND I WAS GONNA
TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS

TO TRY TO GET OVER
MY NERVOUSNESS AROUND WOMEN.

- LADIES...

I'M YOUR HOST,
ANTHONY NAPOLI.

NOW IS YOUR CHANCE
TO MINGLE AND GET TO KNOW

YOUR HUNK, NATHAN.

- ARE YOU GONNA GO UP THERE?

WHERE YOU GONNA BE?

- YOU WANT ME TO LEAVE AGAIN?
- YEAH.

MAYBE GO INTO THE ROOM?
- YOU'RE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?

- NO.

- YOU WANT ME
TO LEAVE THE ROOM AGAIN?

- YEAH.
- UP HERE?

- SURE.
- ALL RIGHT.

- ALL RIGHT.

LET'S GET THIS
PARTY STARTED, HUH?

- YES! OH!
- OHH.

all: OHH...

- WHAT DID YOU GUYS
THINK OF THE HOST?

HE WAS SAYING HE HAD
A THREESOME--HE WAS SAYING.

- WHAT?
- YEAH.

- REALLY?
- YEAH, WITH TWO GUYS.

- WITH TWO GUYS?
- YEAH.

I'M, LIKE, "OKAY,
THANKS FOR TELLING ME THAT.

I DON'T REALLY
WANT TO KNOW."

- YEAH.

- I MEAN--
- SO WEIRD.

- I WAS HAVING FUN
DATING ALL THE WOMEN.

BUT I BEGAN TO FIND IT HARD
TO TELL IF THEY REALLY LIKED ME

OR HAD OTHER MOTIVATIONS
FOR BEING HERE.

- WELL, I'M WORKING
ON MY ALBUM RIGHT NOW.

MY CHRISTIAN MUSIC ALBUM.
- OKAY.

- YEAH.
- CAN I HEAR A SONG OR...

- ♪ PEOPLE MAKE IT SEEM

♪ THAT EVERYONE IS COOL

♪ WITH BEING ALONE

MY ALBUM IS COMING OUT
THIS YEAR, SO...

MY NAME IS L.A.

MY ALBUM IS GONNA
BE CALLED L.A.X.

AND IT'S GONNA
BE COMING OUT THIS YEAR.

MY TWITTER IS @LA--

- AND I WAS SOON REMINDED
THAT MOST OF THESE GIRLS

WERE JUST HERE
TO BE ON TV.

SO I TRIED MY BEST
TO FIND OUT HOW THESE WOMEN

TRULY FELT ABOUT ME.

DO YOU LIKE ME?

- YEAH.
- UM, DO YOU LOVE ME?

OH, GOD!
I CAN'T--THAT'S SUCH--

HOW CAN I TELL THE FIRST--

UH, LOVE, I NEED TO LEARN
THE PERSON FIRST OF COURSE.

YEAH.

- I MEAN, I'D HATE
TO ELIMINATE YOU SO SOON.

SO MAYBE I SHOULD ASK AGAIN.
- OH, DO I LOVE YOU?

- YEAH.
- I LOVE YOU.

- BUT YOU DO?
- I DO.

I LIKE HIM.
HE'S A REALLY NICE PERSON.

BUT, YEAH,
I LOVE HIM, SO...

- BUT AS THE NIGHT WENT ON,
I REALIZED IT DIDN'T MATTER

WHY THEY WERE HERE.

WE WERE BOTH
GETTING WHAT WE WANTED.

I GOT TO WORK THROUGH
MY NERVOUSNESS AROUND WOMEN--

SORRY, I'M KIND OF SHAKING.
- DON'T BE NERVOUS.

DON'T BE NERVOUS,
THAT'S SO CUTE.

- AND THEY
GOT TO BE ON TV.

- I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE EVERYONE
INTRODUCED TO KANGEN WATER.

THIS WATER IS ONE OF
THE BEST WATERS OUT THERE.

IT HAS A PH OF 9.5.

- I'D NEVER BEEN
THAT GOOD OF A FLIRT,

BUT I HAD THE OPPORTUNITY
TO PRACTICE WITH SO MANY

BEAUTIFUL GIRLS.

YOU HAVE BEAUTIFUL EYES
AND BEAUTIFUL LIPS,

AND LOVELY HAIR,
AND YOUR STYLE IS...

WONDERFUL.

- OH...THANKS, NATE.

- SO TELL ME YOUR
DEEPEST, DARKEST SECRET.

- MY DEEPEST,
DARKEST SECRET IS...

I DON'T LIKE WEARING SOCKS.

- THAT'S GREAT.

BUT AS THE NIGHT PROGRESSED...

- OH, COOL.

- MAGIC.

MY FLIRTING SKILLS
DRASTICALLY IMPROVED.

- DO YOU RIDE MOTORCYCLES?
I MEAN--

- I DON'T RIDE A MOTORCYCLE,
BUT I AM A BIT OF A BAD BOY.

BUT WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
I WOULD HAVE NEVER EXPECTED.

- I LIKE MOTORCYCLES, ACTUALLY.
DO YOU RIDE MOTORCYCLES?

- I DON'T RIDE A MOTORCYCLE,
BUT I AM A BIT OF A BAD BOY.

OH, OKAY.

THAT MIGHT BE JUST--
I MEAN, WE'VE ONLY BEEN TALKING

FOR A FEW MINUTES.

WE MIGHT BE MOVING JUST
A LITTLE BIT FAST FOR ME.

I JUST PREFER TO TAKE
THINGS A LITTLE SLOWER.

MM, NO.

IT'S STILL TOO SOON.

WE NEED TO TAKE THINGS SLOW.
WE JUST MET.

- IT'S OKAY.

- IN THAT MOMENT,
EVERYTHING CHANGED.

I WASN'T READY TO MOVE
AS QUICK AS SHE WAS,

BUT I FINALLY KNEW WHAT IT WAS
LIKE TO HAVE A WOMAN COME TO ME.

I REALIZED I DIDN'T
HAVE TO DO CRAZY STUNTS

TO GET WOMEN TO LIKE ME,
I JUST HAD TO BE MYSELF...

INSIDE A $5,000-PER-NIGHT
MANSION

WITH A TV CREW FILMING ME.

BUT FOR A GUY LIKE ME,
WHO'S GONE THROUGH

AN ENTIRE LIFETIME
OF REJECTION,

KNOWING THAT I WAS DESIRABLE
WAS ALL I NEEDED TO NO LONGER

BE NERVOUS AROUND WOMEN.

I HAD ACCOMPLISHED MY GOAL.

SO I GATHERED ALL THE WOMEN
TO TELL THEM

THAT THE SHOW WAS OVER.

I HAVE ACCOMPLISHED MY GOAL,
AND THAT MEANS UNFORTUNATELY

THERE'S NO LONGER A REASON
FOR THIS SHOW, THE HUNK,

TO CONTINUE.

- ARE YOU SERIOUS?

- QUESTION.

SO YOU REALLY--
YOU REALLY--

UM, DID YOU GET YOUR--

YOU GOT--
YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED

FROM DATING ALL THE GIRLS?

YOU GOT YOUR FEAR MET?

- UM, I THINK--

I THINK IT HELPED ME
OVERCOME IT, YES.

WHY?

- I'M JUST WONDERING.

- BUT OTHERS
WERE HAPPY FOR ME.

THANK YOU.
- YEAH.

- I HAD ACCOMPLISHED
WHAT I SET OUT TO DO,

BUT THERE WAS STILL
ONE THING I HAD TO MAKE RIGHT.

EARLIER, TONY SHARED
A PERSONAL STORY WITH ME.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A THREESOME?
- I HAVE, YES.

- AND I ACCIDENTALLY
TOLD IT TO SOME OF THE WOMEN.

HE WAS SAYING HE HAD
A THREESOME WITH TWO GUYS.

- WITH TWO GUYS?
- YEAH.

AND NOW I WANTED
TO APOLOGIZE.

I'M REALIZING NOW,
PERHAPS IT WAS WRONG

TO BRING UP TONY'S
PERSONAL EXPERIENCE HE HAD

IN THE COMFORT OF HIS OWN HOME
WITH TWO MEN.

- I ALREADY HEARD THE STORY.
- YEAH. YEAH, THE THREESOME.

- HIM WITH TWO GUYS?
- YEAH.

- OH, BUT NOT
WITH TWO GUYS.

- WELL, WAS IT
ONE GUY, ONE GIRL?

OR WAS IT TWO GIRLS?
- NAH.

- WHY IS THAT IMPORTANT?
- EXACTLY. THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT.

- AND EVEN IF HE DID,
IT'S HIS OWN BUSINESS.

- YEAH, WE DON'T CARE.
- YEAH, WE DON'T CARE.

- YEAH.
- IT'S ALL GOOD.

- SO I APOLOGIZE FOR THAT,

AND I DON'T WANT TO HAVE
ANY HARD FEELINGS--

- NO HARD FEELINGS.
- BETWEEN US.

- YEAH, ALL RIGHT.
- ALL RIGHT.

- YOUR FEARS ARE ALL GONE?

- HE'S A GREAT GUY.
HE REALLY IS.

- FROM WHAT
YOU KNOW OF.

- OH, YOU'RE NOT?
- NO, I'M A GREAT GUY.

- WHY'D YOU SAY,
"FROM WHAT YOU KNOW OF"?

- WELL, FROM
WHAT YOU KNOW OF ME.

- YEAH, BUT I JUST
CALLED YOU A GREAT GUY.

WHY ARE YOU
ARGUING AGAINST THAT?

- ARE YOU A GOOD GUY?

- AS THE WOMEN WERE LEAVING,
I FELT CONFIDENT IN MYSELF,

KNOWING THAT IF I EVER
WANTED TO FIND LOVE--

THANK YOU.

I COULD JUST CREATE A FAKE
REALITY SHOW ALL OVER AGAIN.