Family Ties (1982–1989): Season 1, Episode 3 - I Know Jennifer's Boyfriend - full transcript

Jennifer finds herself at the mercy of peer pressure when she is teased for being friends with a boy.

♪ I bet we've been together
for a million years ♪

♪ and I'll bet we'll be together
for a million more ♪

♪ oh, it's like
I started breathing ♪

♪ on the night we kissed

♪ and I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪

♪ what would we do, baby

♪ without us?

♪ what would we do, baby

♪ without us?

♪ and there ain't no nothin' ♪

♪ we can't love
each other through ♪

♪ ooh-hoo

♪ what would we do, baby

♪ without us?

♪ sha-la-la-la

hey. Hey, what are you doing
with my paper?

I need it, Alex.
We're going to recycle it.

Wait till
it's been cycled first, okay?

It's this kind
of militant behavior

that gives you environmentalists
a bad name.

don't have a bad name!

They do with Alex.

The whole idea
of recycling is ridiculous.

It's a waste of time.

Listen, Alex,
this planet's in real danger.

There's a limitation
to the earth's resources.

Unless we all do our share,

the entire
life-support structure

is in danger of collapsing

and destroying life on earth
as we know it.

Grow up, will you, Jennifer?

Bad news, kids...
No sweets, no treats, no meats.

Lots of yogurt...
Some stuff from Bulgaria.

It's not from Bulgaria, Mallory.
It is bulgur.

It's a fine grain, and it's rich
in vitamins, minerals, and iron.

Looks like cattle food.

Hi, Justin. Hi.

Can you stay for dinner?

Gee... I wish I could.

Maybe some other time.


Mrs. Perkins?

your mother's not here...

Why don't you guys just stop
calling, okay?

Ha ha ha.
My side hurts from laughing.

I am not!

Am not!

So are you!

Wrong number.

I thought so.

it's these kids from school.

They're making fun of us

because Jennifer and I
like to play together.

They call me Mrs. Perkins,

and they sing,
* I know Jennifer's boyfriend


I know that kind of teasing can
really hurt.

How are you holding up, Justin?

Frankly, I'm above it.

I know that the other kids
find it strange

that me and Jennifer
are such good friends,

but we'd be friends
no matter what.

The fact that Jennifer's a girl

just makes it more exciting
to me.

You're gonna do real well
in high school, you know?

Well, this will
cheer you up, anyways.

I've got a terrific idea
for your birthday party.

If it's your idea,
it's going to involve boys.

of course it involves boys.

I mean, a bunch of girls
sitting around is not a party.

It's a wake.

Now, where did you get
an attitude like that?

I have a great time when
I'm just with my women friends.

Well, that's different, mom.

You're married.
It's over for you.

Do me a favor
and don't tell your father.

Anyway, my idea
is to have a '50s party.

Funny music and funny skirts...

You put grease in your hair,
and you look really silly.

It's neato.

I don't know.
I never heard of the '50s.


Hi, Justin. Hi, sweetie.

Oh, great. You got bulgur.

Ugh. You guys really
stick together, don't you?


Mrs. Perkins?

Is your mother here, Justin?

Just for your information,

we happen to be above this,
you baby!

Says you!

Am not!

I have a feeling
I missed something.

Well, the other kids
have been teasing Jennifer

because she plays with Justin.

Yeah, they've been
calling here all afternoon.

Oh, but they're
just jealous, that's all.

Well, you have to admit, though,
it I a little bit unusual.

I mean, you know, an intersexual
relationship at that age.

Sounds unusual at any age.

Let me get it.

Now, listen.
This is going to have to stop.

This is our home,

and your calling here
is childish, it's annoying,

and we really don't appreciate
the intrusion in our lives.

It's your mother.

Well, Jennifer's feeling
a little better.

Oh, that's good.

At least the phone
stopped ringing, anyway.


I think
it's gonna be quite a while

before my mother calls again.

Apparently, something good
has come out of this.

It's a little sad, though,
isn't it?

After all that's happened
in the past 15 years or so...

Eliminating sexual stereotypes,

improved communication
between men and women...

And, still,
4th-grade boys and girls

don't get along very well.

I don't know. Did you play
with girls when you were 10?

Of course not.
What do I look like, a sissy?

That was different.

That was before "sesame street,"

before consciousness-raising,
before Ms. magazine...

What we men like to refer to
as "the good old days."

Is that so?

Actually, no.

These are the good old days.



Would you guys cut it out?

There are young children
in the house.

I've seen worse.

Why does this bother you
so much?

Well, 'cause you guys are old.

I mean, it's just not something
that parents should be doing.

At least
those are normal kisses.

Unlike when your friends
are here.


You should see it.

They try to bite
each other's tongues off.


It's called Dutch kissing.

I thought I'd barf.

I'm going out
to get a hamburger.

I'll come with you.

Where you going?
You just had dinner.

No, I just had bulgur, lentils,
mixed Greens.

That's only dinner
if you're a heifer or a gerbil.

You coming, Jen?

No, I got to get
these papers wrapped.

We're going to recycle them

What are you gonna do
with the money you raise?

We're gonna donate them to
the wildlife preservation fund.

This is your influence.
You realize that, I hope.

I gather
you're against recycling?

It's just interfering

with the natural order
of things, that's all.

Look, look, a man goes out
and he buys something.

He keeps it for a while,
he uses it, he enjoys it,

then he gets tired of it,
he throws it away,

and he buys a new one.

I mean, that's nature.

Thank you, ranger Rick.

See ya.

So, you excited
about your birthday?

I guess.

Oh, come on.

I've seen you more excited
on the way to the dentist.


When you were in 4th grade,
were there boys?

Yeah. Boys were invented
when I was in kindergarten.

They sure
make things complicated.

Do you think
we really need them?

Come on. Boys are okay.

What about your daddy?
He was a boy once.

I find that hard to believe.

What about Justin?

He's a boy,
and he's awfully nice.

That's two
in the whole history of boys.

What about Alex?

Give me a break!

Chrissy says if I'm gonna play
with Justin all the time,

she doesn't want
to be my friend.

That's what Dana and Maria
say, too.

Wait... you can't
let other people decide

who your friends are gonna be.

I know it, but...

I don't want to lose them.

And I still want to be
Justin's friend, too.

Well, hang in there.

A good friend's hard to find.

A good man's even harder.

Yeah, yeah. Those all sound like
good choices.

Elvis? Right. Right.

Chuck Berry? Good.

Snooky Lanson? I don't think so.

I-it's nothing against Snooky,

it's just that I don't think
we need any more records.

He'll perform live?

Uh, no, let's just
go with what we've got.

A-all right. Thanks.

We're all set.

The jukebox will have 50 of
the biggest hits of the '50s...

"Earth angel" by The Penguins,

"heartbreak hotel,"
Elvis Presley,

"twilight time," The Platters,
"maybellene" by Chuck Berry,

and if you call now,

we'll include "Eddie my love"
by the fabulous Teen Queens.

You're two minutes
too late, kid.

Mom and dad were really
being silly. You missed it.

I'm sure
I'll get another chance.

How'd it go
at the recycling center?

We unloaded a whole trunk full
of newspapers,

and that's what they gave us.

77 cents?

A lot of good 77 cents is going
to do the bald eagle.

It won't even buy him
a cheap cap.

You know, I desperately need
some loose change.

If you would let me
take those coins

and take this dollar bill

you'd be doing me
a very big favor.


You know,
I don't have any ones at all.

And... and if you would give me
that $1 for this $5,

I'd really appreciate it.


I think I can get you
your 77 cents back.


Just kidding.

I'll talk to you about it later,
all right?

Hey, wasn't Justin
coming home with you?

No, they dropped me off.

Didn't you say
he was gonna be here for dinner?



I mean, I said it but I didn't.

I don't understand.

Okay, here's the story.

Justin's history...
Yesterday's news.

Adiós, amigo.

"Good night, Irene."

What are you talking about?

Justin was your best friend
this morning.

That was a long time ago,
before I knew he was a boy!

Oh, I get it.

Jennifer, this doesn't
seem like... look,

I think I know
who my friends are,

and he's a boy!

He just won't be around
anymore, okay?

Leave me alone!

Score one for peer pressure.

I can't believe this newspaper.


This headline is incredibly
slanted and misleading.

They never give the other side.

"Widowed mother of 12
denied food stamps."

There's another side
to this story?

It's just the way
they cover it, that's all.

They make it
so cold and impersonal.

"When questioned,
the commissioner replied,

'hey, these things happen.
That's the breaks. Next case.'"

you're right.
They missed the warmth entirely.

Uh, Justin called for you
four times.


Aren't you gonna call him back?

I'll see him at school.

And if I miss him there,
I'll drop him a card.


Everything's set
for the party tomorrow...

Records, posters, pez.

I can't think
of anything else we need.

I can think
of something we don't need.

What? Boys!

Now, does this
have anything to do

with the teasing
and the phone calls?


I just think we'd have more fun
if there were only girls.

When's that line of thinking
gonna change?

Even if you wanted to,
it's too late.

All the invitations are out,

and some of the boys
have accepted.

We could move.


Hello, Jennifer.

Hi, Justin. Bye, Justin.

Wait a minute!
I'd like to talk to you.

I-I can't.

I can't talk.

I'll see you later. Bye.

That didn't go
as smoothly as I'd hoped.

I'm sorry, Justin.

She doesn't want to see me.

I think it's just a phase.

You know? I'm sure it'll change.

She doesn't want to see me
because I'm a boy.

That's not gonna change.

Sure it will.

Well, not the part
about you being a boy,

but her attitude will change.

What bothers me the most
is that...

I really miss her.

She's a very special person,

and I really feel
the absence of her in my life.

This guy can't be only 9.

Justin, I am sorry.

I-I-i apologize
for Jennifer's behavior.

Mr. Keaton,
would you mind walking me home?

I-I don't really feel like
being alone right now.

I can come along, too,
if you'd like.

If you don't mind,

I was hoping Mr. Keaton and I

could have a little guy talk.

What do you say?

Sure. That's fine with me.

Let's go.

You want to stop somewhere
and have a beer?


Okay, maybe just one.

But if I start acting silly,
take me home.

Can we talk?

Sure, but not about how dirty
my room is, okay?

Can we talk about
when you're gonna clean it up?

There are so many
more interesting things

to talk about, don't you think?

Shouldn't some of this
be put away?

Simba and I are of the belief

that all animals...
Even stuffed ones...

Should be allowed to roam free.

Well, I'm gonna talk to her
when I finish talking to you.

I don't think you were very nice
to Justin this afternoon.

I think you owe him an apology.

Okay, I'll apologize
because I wasn't very nice.

But that doesn't mean
I have to be his friend.

I have a right to pick
my own friends, don't I?

But you did pick Justin
as a friend,

and for really good reasons...

He's... he's thoughtful,
he's sweet, he's...

Don't get carried away,
okay, mom?

He's not Alan Alda.

I don't like
being teased, mom...

People laughing,
pointing fingers,

putting signs on my back...

"if found,
return to Justin Perkins."

I know that's hard,

but y-you got to learn
to stand up to stuff like that.

It's particularly important

for women to be strong
in areas like that.

You're not
gonna put the pressure

of the whole women's movement
on me, are you?

No, dear,
but I do think it's important

for boys and girls
to be friends.

That way,
maybe when they grow up,

they'll know how to be friends
as men and women.

That doesn't happen now?

Not a lot. Not enough.

How come?

There's a lot
of role-playing going on...

Women playing at being
all cute and helpless,

men playing at being tough
and... and always in control.

That's crazy.

But, see,
that's what we were taught.

I remember when I was 15

my mother telling me
the definition of a young lady.

A young lady always says
"please" and "thank you,"

she always laughs
at a young man's jokes,

and a young lady
never beats a boy in sports.

Good thing
we don't have any young ladies

on our soccer team.

This boy/girl stuff is pretty
complicated business, huh?

You ain't seen nothin' yet.

Wait till you get to be
a teenager.

Am I gonna be like Mallory

and get crazy
for clothes and movie stars?

I think
you're gonna be like Jennifer.

What's that?

Warm, sweet, funny.

Doesn't sound like
any teenager I know.

See, you and Justin are friends.

You like each other.
Y-you have fun together.

That should be what matters.

I want to do it, mom.

I do.

But I don't know if I can.


Sleep on it.

Vroom! Vroom! Vroom!

Hey, Fonzie.

Can you give me a hand here?

Uh, I don't know
how to break this to you, dad,

but the last wave left
about an hour ago.

Just give me a hand, will ya?

I can't believe people actually
dressed like this.

In those days,

a jacket like that
was a symbol of rebellion,

an emblem
of an entire generation.

It meant you were tough

and that you could hold your own
in a rumble.

You have one like this?

No, my mother wouldn't let me.

Am I dreaming,
or did Sandra Dee just walk in?

Moondoggie, is that you?!

Hurry, Gidge! Surf's up!


I hope you two
get this out of your system

before the guests arrive.

Hey, where is the birthday girl?

She's upstairs.

Mallory's putting
the final touches on her.

She better hurry.
Kids will be here any minute.

Everything's all set.

Ain't this a beauty?

This is
exactly like the one they had

at the Paradise Hotel
in Atlantic City

when I worked there in 1959.


That was a great summer!


Hey, wait a minute.
I didn't know you in 1959.

I-I-it would have been a better
summer if I had known you.

Better than great?


You can't go out
with only one lip done!

I don't like it.

It feels like
I have jelly on me.

Well, you're
supposed to look '50s, not punk.


All right, all right.
Come on. They're here.

Can I see
your invitations, please?


I don't know these guys.
They could be crashers.

Come on in, guys.
Welcome to the 1950s.

Hope you have as much fun
as I did.

All right. Guys, you look great.

All right, Sam.

Hey, fantastic.
Look at that outfit.

Hey, ladies. How are you?


I think I detect a trend here.

Here. Hey, Jennifer.

Fellas, I got an idea...
Why don't we, uh, saunter over

to the other side
of the room here?

Come on, come on, come on.
You all know each other.

You're in the same class, right?

This is fantastic.

Quite a... uh...

It's gonna be a long night.

Well, 8 out of the 10 boys
I interviewed

will dance with a girl if asked.

9 out of 10 think we should give
reaganomics a chance. Alex!

You know, I was
just thinking, it's interesting

the way they're more aware
politically than socially.

Can you get them
to dance or can't you?


But no of them is gonna be
the first one out there.

Of the girls I polled,

they're willing to dance
with boys, if asked,

and if the boy is taller.

The S.A.L. talks couldn't
have been this complicated.

I bet they were a lot more fun.

I mean, let's face it...
This party is dying.

Well, mommy...

I hope you're satisfied.

Don't get sarcastic
with me, Jennifer.

I don't like that.


I don't talk that way to you.

If something's bothering you,

you just come right out
and tell me what it is.


You ruined my party
by inviting the boys here!


Jennifer, that's not fair.

You always take
her side, don't you, daddy?

It's "gang up on the kid" time
again, huh?

Now, Jennifer, I know
you're upset with me right now,

and, to tell you the truth, I'm
not all that thrilled with you.

But if there's gonna be
a way out of this tonight,

it's gonna come from you.


I think you ought to
ask Justin to dance.

Be serious!

I am. And I think
there are a lot of kids here

who will be very happy

if someone else
makes the first move.

I'm afraid to, mom.

What are you afraid of?

People will laugh.

I won't. I won't.

I won't.

I might.

Just being honest.

Well, let's say that that's
the worst thing that happens.

People will laugh.

The best thing
that's gonna happen

is that you'll dance
with Justin,

the other kids will dance,

and you'll wind up
having a terrific party.

I want to, mom.

I really do.

But I don't know
if I have the guts.

All right, everybody,

this next one is going to be,
um, ladies' choice.

♪ can't you see
my head is reeling ♪

♪ there's so many things
I'm feeling ♪

♪ don't know
what I'm thinking of ♪

♪ I'm so in love ♪

♪ pardon me ♪

Will you dance with me, Justin?

I thought you'd never ask.

♪ just blame it
on the stars above ♪

♪ I'm lucky in love ♪

♪ don't think we'll ever see
our dreams come true ♪

Want to dance?

It's ladies' choice.

I'm cool.

Care to dance, sailor?

♪ so easy

♪ this helpless mooning ♪

♪ bound to be ♪

Oh, what the hell.

♪ ...Sentimental fool... ♪

Happy birthday.

♪ like me ♪