Big Time Rush (2009–2013): Season 4, Episode 8 - Big Time Rush - full transcript
While James buys a motorcycle in another attempt to win Lucy's heart, Kendall teaches Jo how to drive cars with manual transmissions.
Are you wondering how healthy the food you are eating is? Check it - foodval.com
---
- I'm going to go make
- a corn dog.
- Don't move.
- Hey,
- can you sign my shirt for me
- That I'm definitely not selling
- on the web.
Both: Shh.
- Is he ready?
- Whoo!
Both: He's ready.
- Today I take my first medical
college admissions test
- and the first step to being
- a doctor.
- You're supposed to take
- that test
After four years of college,
not before you enter college.
- Yes, but..
You're never too young
to prepare for your future.
- Exactly,
and once I ace this test,
- they'll probably ask me to skip
- college and go right to surgery.
Now... things.
- Healthy snacks to keep
your brain at it's peak.
- Four juice boxes
with convenient caddy
to keep your brain hydrated.
- Kendall.
- And all our positive energy.
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
Positive energy...
- Okay,
- I need more positive energy.
Where's James?
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
Posi...
- Lucy left
- for a European tour.
She really won't be mine.
- No. No "uh-ohs."
- Positive energy.
- Positive energy.
- Positive...
- ♪ Make it count,
play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
- what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Fine, I'll take the test
- without his energy.
- You're gonna fail.
- Rude, and I won't,
- because I have Carlos.
- Wait.
Why do I have to take the test?
- Don't question the smart one,
- okay?
- And my car needs a smog test,
- but first, drop me off
- at rocque records.
- You got it.
- Good luck with that.
- Thanks.
- Okay,
- we'll get started once everyone
Has their test
and answer sheets.
- Thank you.
- Why am I even here?
I don't like tests.
We don't get along.
See.
- Stop that.
Stop it.
Stop.
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
- I'm leaving
- unless you tell me why
You need me next to you.
- I... i think you're
my good luck chum.
- Go on.
- It's true; Look, when you're
- next to me, good things happen.
When Debbie Crawford said yes
to the sixth grade dance,
you were next to me.
- When I scored my first
- pee-wee hockey goal,
You were next to me.
And yesterday by the pool...
Hey.
- Hey?
How about a chum hug?
- Whoa.
Oh!
- Oh,
- so you want another chum hug?
- No, no.
- I want you to sit there,
- be lucky, and take this test.
- No, I don't want to take
- this test.
- I want to go home
- and eat corn dogs.
- Okay, I am the smart one,
- so you should listen to me now
And take it.
- Remember, some questions
have multiple answers.
- And the medical exams begin...
- Now.
- So you want talk about...
- Lucy told pop tiger she's
- looking for a sensitive guy.
Um, hello?
- You are, but Lucy's on a tour
far, far away,
and you have to move on.
- Which is why I'm taking the
"is he a bad boyfriend?" Test.
- I'm not sure I'm following...
- Why can't I have a meaningful
- relationship like you and Jo?
Am I doing something wrong?
And perhaps the answers
are right here.
- Okay,
or we could go skateboarding.
- "You've had a tough day,
- and you're upset.
"Your boyfriend, 'a, '
- "takes you out for cocoa
- and tells you to let it out.
"Or, 'b, '
- talks about himself and checks
- his hair in his phone."
Well...
- "'A, '
- takes you out for cocoa."
- Mm-hmm.
- I think in order to take
- that test,
You have to be... honest.
- That wasn't honest?
- No, it's just that I had
- a really tough day, and...
- Is this story gonna take long?
- Oh.
- Oh, okay.
- Well, then, why don't you be a
- girl and take the test for me?
- I'm not taking
a boyfriend test.
- I don't know what's wrong
- with me,
- And I want a serious girlfriend,
- and your honesty will help.
Please.
- I can't believe
I'm doing this.
- Okay,
number two.
"On average, does your man think
of 'a, ' himself,
or 'b, ' you?"
- Himself.
- I'm telling you,
- I don't know who emailed you
- From the studio to come here,
- but it wasn't us.
- Well, then, who was it?
- It was me.
And welcome, volunteers,
to our new product testing lab.
What?
- Secretly, I've installed
- throughout rocque records
The latest products
from rcm/cbt/globannet/sanyoid
- ready for you testing
- and approval.
- But we didn't volunteer
- for this.
- Then volunteer.
Because I want people
that won't sue us
as we test the latest products
for today's finicky tweens,
- the modern working woman,
- and anyone who wants to lose
20% of their body size.
- Wait, who are you looking at?
- I'm asking who wants to be
the first one to test
sanyoid's multipurpose
massage chair.
- 7 hidden
- surround sound speakers,
27 massage settings to roll
the day's tension away,
- and neural enhancers
- that stimulate the mind's monads
To keep you at peak performance.
- Forget it,
- 'cause no one wants to test
Your stupid massage chair.
- But Katie's already sitting
- in it.
- Okay.
I could get used to this.
- Okay, out.
I want to test it.
- ♪ Picture this, first kiss
beneath the moonlight ♪
- Ahh!
- Make a note that the
neural enhancers shock people.
- Well, for those of you who
- waited for your test results,
Many of you did great,
some of you not so great,
and one of you
got every answer correct.
- And that would be...
- What?
- A 38.
- Yeah, you're not ready
for medical school yet.
And you...
- Okay,
I'm took the pencils.
I'm so sorry.
They're just so yellow.
- You scored 100%.
- What?
- What?
- Yeah, it's amazing.
- Tell me, does your friend wear
- that helmet
To protect his massive brain?
- Come on.
- It's the last one.
- No.
- I don't want to answer it.
- Hey, you're Mr. Honest.
Now, "it's your biggest
gymnastics meet of the year,
"and your boyfriend is 'a, '
"in the front row
with your parents, or 'b, '
- "shows up late,
- because he stopped at the mall
To buy a new shirt."
- New shirt.
- What?
- James, a pop tiger test
- is not going to answer
- Whether you're a good boyfriend
- or not.
You're a great guy.
- Really,
- 'cause according to this,
We shouldn't even be going out.
- Um, we're not going out.
- Oh, oh, just because I'm so
- terrible to be around, huh?
Yeah, thanks.
- Okay,
- maybe this was a mistake.
- Really, this whole thing
- since kindergarten
Was a mistake.
- Uh...
- No, no, no, no.
- Have it your way,
- 'cause I'm out of here.
- What was that all about?
- I think James and I just broke
- up.
- Oh,
- that is disgusting.
- No, that's rcm food's new
power juice in that juice box
made with vitamins, minerals,
and tiny chunks of fish.
We should improve the flavor.
- Globalnet's new auto bright
- light switches
Save time and energy.
- Ahh!
My... my eyes!
- Hmm, too bright.
- Sanyoid's new 4-d tvs
are so real,
you will jump out of your seat.
- Ah! Bats!
- Bats!
- Get them away from me!
They're everywhere!
Ahh!
- Bring down the realness
down 30%.
- Ahh!
Griffin.
- We are done testing
your products.
- Your products are bad.
Test over, and you can't keep us
here against our will.
- No, but the rcm remote
family security
home control system can.
It keeps unwanted intruders out
and unruly teenagers in.
And you're not going anywhere
until we finish our tests.
Ahh.
- Oh.
Oh, honey,
did you do badly on the test?
- I did terrible.
- Okay, okay, well,
it was your first try,
- and it's the hardest test
- in the world.
- Oh.
- Oh, really?
- Okay, well, then,
- how come Carlos aced it?
- Come again.
- 'Sup, mama knight?
I'm gonna be a doctor.
- I'm the smart one.
Okay, so you hit a bump
in the road,
- but sitting on the couch
- depressed
Is never the answer.
- Depression, huh.
Hmm, take two corn dogs,
and call me in the morning.
- Corn dogs are not the answer
- to everything.
- Oh, trust me, it is.
And who's the smart one?
Me.
Nurse,
send in my next patient.
- I'm not a nurse,
- and you don't have a patient.
- Then I'll go find
my next patient.
- Don't actually touch anyone.
- Got it.
- What am I gonna do,
- Mrs. Knight?
My future doctor dream is dashed
oh, and...
Carlos is smarter than me.
- Here's what you're gonna do.
- You're gonna pick yourself up.
And you're pick another
exciting future for yourself,
like an airline pilot
or a politician or a lawyer...
- A stunt man.
- No, that wasn't on my list.
- But it would be exciting.
- All you've got to do is break
- a few plates over your head
And fall from the sky
and stuff.
- No, there will be no
- breaking plates or falling
In this apartment.
- Okay, well, then I will
practice my career elsewhere.
- So... bombed your test
- and looking for
An exciting fall-back career?
- I'm rethinking stuntman.
- Oh, I always wanted to be
a stunt man.
- You stay a janitor.
- You... the palm woods is offering
- a manager trainee program.
It's the ultimate job
when your dreams fail.
- Never.
- I'm smarter than Logan.
And here are two frozen corn
dogs to stop the swelling.
- Corn dogs are not the answer.
- Okay, everybody,
stop falling on my desk.
- Oh, there you are.
I've got some of your things.
Here's your hockey magazine
that I borrowed,
- your dress shoes,
- which I polished,
- Oh, and your snap-tight
- rescue ranger fire truck.
- The wheel was missing
- when I borrowed it.
- Okay,
it was a boyfriend test,
which we are not.
We are best friends.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Then you won't mind taking
last month's
"are you really besties?" Test?
- I'm leaving.
- Best friends don't leave
- best friends.
Hit me.
- "Do you know your besties
- favorite color?"
- Purple.
- Correct.
- "Have you been on campouts
- or vacations together?"
- We live in the same apartment.
- I'll count that as a yes.
- "What is
- your b-f-f's birthday?"
- September 3rd?
- Eh!
4th.
"Where did you meet your b-f-f?"
- Kindergarten?
- Danny craven's
- fifth birthday party.
- Bald eagle?
- Eh!
- Cream rinse and conditioner?
Apples...
No, grapes.
- More purple-y stuff.
Chewbacca.
Three... nine.
- No.
- Wrong.
- Eh!
- No.
Wrong again.
- So how'd I do...
Best friend?
- You scored an "a,"
as in a person
who is no longer my bestie.
- It's no use.
- We're trapped.
Trapped in our own studio.
- And we're surrounded
- by Griffin's crazy tests.
- And they could be anywhere.
- Actually,
there's only two tests left.
One, rcm's innovative wall
conferencing system,
which works great.
And two, this thing.
Now, who wants to try it?
- Sweetie,
- you don't have to decide
On your future career today.
Please.
- So far today I've failed
- at stuntman,
Books on tape narrator,
pet psychic, and now chef,
which I thought would be like
a doctor in the kitchen.
I'm calling it.
Time of death:
Now.
- You and me are a lot alike,
- Logan.
- Please don't say that.
- We both failed
at our dream jobs.
- You'll never be a stuntman.
- Don't you crush my dreams.
- Look, life doesn't always turn
- out the way you'd like it to.
Like, how you failed
the biggest test of your life,
and...
I'm coming down with a cold.
- Huh.
Hmm, yep, you do sound warm.
You know what you need?
A corn dog.
- Oh, come on.
- Corn dogs are not the answer.
- I do feel better.
- Oh, he's feels better.
You failed.
I passed.
Smart one.
- You know,
maybe you'd feel better
if you had a solid future
like Carlos.
- Don't be too nice
- to the residents.
They will walk all over you.
- Hey, can I get a new key card?
- Ahh!
- You're a natural.
- Take two of these,
and you'll feel better.
- Okay, so I failed
the best friend test.
But you would have too.
What's my favorite color?
- Blue.
- Your favorite food
- is veggie pizza.
- If you could own any animal
- in the world,
It would be the occelot.
- The nectarine
- is your favorite fruit.
- Your first crush was Elin fekete
- because of her cute laugh,
- And, oh,
- do I know your biggest secret,
And I'd tell you,
- but I swore that I'd speak
- those words out loud.
- Okay, that's good.
But this is not about me.
- It's about you and how a girl
- that you had
A big crush on left.
- And you want to take a test
- to deal with it,
We'll take a test.
- What magazine?
- Best friends illustrated.
True or false:
James diamond is amazing
- and never feels sorry
- for himself.
- True.
True or false:
Lucy stone was also amazing
- but is not the only amazing girl
- in the world.
True.
- When James diamond
- is in the crib,
And there is a pool full
of amazing girls
just downstairs, he "a,"
fights with his best friend
over pop tiger tests, or "b,"
runs down there
and gets his pool on.
- "B," pool on!
Look, out ladies.
James diamond is back.
Ha-ha-ha!
- So are you and James
- are back together?
- Yep.
- Okay, we are not testing
- that thing
Till you tell us what it does.
- The weight-i-ator is
- an internal cell accelerator
That vibrates excess weight
at such hyper speeds,
it reduces your body size
up to 20% instantly.
Now, who's first?
- Come on.
- It's revolutionary.
- And nobody leaves
until we test it?
- That's right.
- Then let's test it.
Great.
Full power.
Three, two...
Now!
Yes, the weight-i-ator
is a huge success.
- So we can go now.
- Sure.
- You might want to get
working on a "reverse" setting.
- Duly noted.
Both: Move out.
- Okay, what is going on?
- Well, I'm over Lucy leaving.
- And James and I
are besties forever.
- But Logan bombed
- his medical test,
And Carlos is a doctor.
- Oh.
- Hello, I hope you're having
- a palm woods day.
How can I help you?
- Look, I'm prescribing you
- to take off that jacket
And try and be a doctor again.
- No, you're the smart one.
You're the doctor now.
- Dr. Carlos,
- I still a bit achy.
- Did he just prescribe a...
Yep.
- Carlos,
- for the last time,
- Corn dogs are not the answer
- to everything.
- Yes, it is.
- What?
You guessed on the entire test?
- Are you serious.
- Well, I mean,
he always did say
that I was the lucky one.
And you still get to be
the smart one.
- And you'll just study harder
and take the test again.
- Yeah, well, maybe I'm not
cut out to be a doctor?
- Well, I know I'm not.
- Yeah, I mean, bitters is red
- in the face
- And holding his throat, and he
- has no idea what that means.
Oh! He's choking.
- He's choking.
- He's actually choking.
- Is there a doctor
- in the house?
- Okay, everyone, stand back.
- Oh.
- Oh!
- Are you okay?
- You saved my life.
Thank you.
- And I am taking you out of that
- training program,
- So you can continue studying
- for that test.
- I guess I did kind of
spring into action
- it was spring-tastic.
- I guess saving people
is in my blood.
- And I'll be there
right by your side.
- Great.
- Great?
Doncha mean chum hug!
All:
Don't be a stuntman.
- Fine.
- ♪ Step it up,
- get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
---
- I'm going to go make
- a corn dog.
- Don't move.
- Hey,
- can you sign my shirt for me
- That I'm definitely not selling
- on the web.
Both: Shh.
- Is he ready?
- Whoo!
Both: He's ready.
- Today I take my first medical
college admissions test
- and the first step to being
- a doctor.
- You're supposed to take
- that test
After four years of college,
not before you enter college.
- Yes, but..
You're never too young
to prepare for your future.
- Exactly,
and once I ace this test,
- they'll probably ask me to skip
- college and go right to surgery.
Now... things.
- Healthy snacks to keep
your brain at it's peak.
- Four juice boxes
with convenient caddy
to keep your brain hydrated.
- Kendall.
- And all our positive energy.
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
Positive energy...
- Okay,
- I need more positive energy.
Where's James?
- Positive energy,
- positive energy,
Posi...
- Lucy left
- for a European tour.
She really won't be mine.
- No. No "uh-ohs."
- Positive energy.
- Positive energy.
- Positive...
- ♪ Make it count,
play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
- what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Fine, I'll take the test
- without his energy.
- You're gonna fail.
- Rude, and I won't,
- because I have Carlos.
- Wait.
Why do I have to take the test?
- Don't question the smart one,
- okay?
- And my car needs a smog test,
- but first, drop me off
- at rocque records.
- You got it.
- Good luck with that.
- Thanks.
- Okay,
- we'll get started once everyone
Has their test
and answer sheets.
- Thank you.
- Why am I even here?
I don't like tests.
We don't get along.
See.
- Stop that.
Stop it.
Stop.
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
- I'm leaving
- unless you tell me why
You need me next to you.
- I... i think you're
my good luck chum.
- Go on.
- It's true; Look, when you're
- next to me, good things happen.
When Debbie Crawford said yes
to the sixth grade dance,
you were next to me.
- When I scored my first
- pee-wee hockey goal,
You were next to me.
And yesterday by the pool...
Hey.
- Hey?
How about a chum hug?
- Whoa.
Oh!
- Oh,
- so you want another chum hug?
- No, no.
- I want you to sit there,
- be lucky, and take this test.
- No, I don't want to take
- this test.
- I want to go home
- and eat corn dogs.
- Okay, I am the smart one,
- so you should listen to me now
And take it.
- Remember, some questions
have multiple answers.
- And the medical exams begin...
- Now.
- So you want talk about...
- Lucy told pop tiger she's
- looking for a sensitive guy.
Um, hello?
- You are, but Lucy's on a tour
far, far away,
and you have to move on.
- Which is why I'm taking the
"is he a bad boyfriend?" Test.
- I'm not sure I'm following...
- Why can't I have a meaningful
- relationship like you and Jo?
Am I doing something wrong?
And perhaps the answers
are right here.
- Okay,
or we could go skateboarding.
- "You've had a tough day,
- and you're upset.
"Your boyfriend, 'a, '
- "takes you out for cocoa
- and tells you to let it out.
"Or, 'b, '
- talks about himself and checks
- his hair in his phone."
Well...
- "'A, '
- takes you out for cocoa."
- Mm-hmm.
- I think in order to take
- that test,
You have to be... honest.
- That wasn't honest?
- No, it's just that I had
- a really tough day, and...
- Is this story gonna take long?
- Oh.
- Oh, okay.
- Well, then, why don't you be a
- girl and take the test for me?
- I'm not taking
a boyfriend test.
- I don't know what's wrong
- with me,
- And I want a serious girlfriend,
- and your honesty will help.
Please.
- I can't believe
I'm doing this.
- Okay,
number two.
"On average, does your man think
of 'a, ' himself,
or 'b, ' you?"
- Himself.
- I'm telling you,
- I don't know who emailed you
- From the studio to come here,
- but it wasn't us.
- Well, then, who was it?
- It was me.
And welcome, volunteers,
to our new product testing lab.
What?
- Secretly, I've installed
- throughout rocque records
The latest products
from rcm/cbt/globannet/sanyoid
- ready for you testing
- and approval.
- But we didn't volunteer
- for this.
- Then volunteer.
Because I want people
that won't sue us
as we test the latest products
for today's finicky tweens,
- the modern working woman,
- and anyone who wants to lose
20% of their body size.
- Wait, who are you looking at?
- I'm asking who wants to be
the first one to test
sanyoid's multipurpose
massage chair.
- 7 hidden
- surround sound speakers,
27 massage settings to roll
the day's tension away,
- and neural enhancers
- that stimulate the mind's monads
To keep you at peak performance.
- Forget it,
- 'cause no one wants to test
Your stupid massage chair.
- But Katie's already sitting
- in it.
- Okay.
I could get used to this.
- Okay, out.
I want to test it.
- ♪ Picture this, first kiss
beneath the moonlight ♪
- Ahh!
- Make a note that the
neural enhancers shock people.
- Well, for those of you who
- waited for your test results,
Many of you did great,
some of you not so great,
and one of you
got every answer correct.
- And that would be...
- What?
- A 38.
- Yeah, you're not ready
for medical school yet.
And you...
- Okay,
I'm took the pencils.
I'm so sorry.
They're just so yellow.
- You scored 100%.
- What?
- What?
- Yeah, it's amazing.
- Tell me, does your friend wear
- that helmet
To protect his massive brain?
- Come on.
- It's the last one.
- No.
- I don't want to answer it.
- Hey, you're Mr. Honest.
Now, "it's your biggest
gymnastics meet of the year,
"and your boyfriend is 'a, '
"in the front row
with your parents, or 'b, '
- "shows up late,
- because he stopped at the mall
To buy a new shirt."
- New shirt.
- What?
- James, a pop tiger test
- is not going to answer
- Whether you're a good boyfriend
- or not.
You're a great guy.
- Really,
- 'cause according to this,
We shouldn't even be going out.
- Um, we're not going out.
- Oh, oh, just because I'm so
- terrible to be around, huh?
Yeah, thanks.
- Okay,
- maybe this was a mistake.
- Really, this whole thing
- since kindergarten
Was a mistake.
- Uh...
- No, no, no, no.
- Have it your way,
- 'cause I'm out of here.
- What was that all about?
- I think James and I just broke
- up.
- Oh,
- that is disgusting.
- No, that's rcm food's new
power juice in that juice box
made with vitamins, minerals,
and tiny chunks of fish.
We should improve the flavor.
- Globalnet's new auto bright
- light switches
Save time and energy.
- Ahh!
My... my eyes!
- Hmm, too bright.
- Sanyoid's new 4-d tvs
are so real,
you will jump out of your seat.
- Ah! Bats!
- Bats!
- Get them away from me!
They're everywhere!
Ahh!
- Bring down the realness
down 30%.
- Ahh!
Griffin.
- We are done testing
your products.
- Your products are bad.
Test over, and you can't keep us
here against our will.
- No, but the rcm remote
family security
home control system can.
It keeps unwanted intruders out
and unruly teenagers in.
And you're not going anywhere
until we finish our tests.
Ahh.
- Oh.
Oh, honey,
did you do badly on the test?
- I did terrible.
- Okay, okay, well,
it was your first try,
- and it's the hardest test
- in the world.
- Oh.
- Oh, really?
- Okay, well, then,
- how come Carlos aced it?
- Come again.
- 'Sup, mama knight?
I'm gonna be a doctor.
- I'm the smart one.
Okay, so you hit a bump
in the road,
- but sitting on the couch
- depressed
Is never the answer.
- Depression, huh.
Hmm, take two corn dogs,
and call me in the morning.
- Corn dogs are not the answer
- to everything.
- Oh, trust me, it is.
And who's the smart one?
Me.
Nurse,
send in my next patient.
- I'm not a nurse,
- and you don't have a patient.
- Then I'll go find
my next patient.
- Don't actually touch anyone.
- Got it.
- What am I gonna do,
- Mrs. Knight?
My future doctor dream is dashed
oh, and...
Carlos is smarter than me.
- Here's what you're gonna do.
- You're gonna pick yourself up.
And you're pick another
exciting future for yourself,
like an airline pilot
or a politician or a lawyer...
- A stunt man.
- No, that wasn't on my list.
- But it would be exciting.
- All you've got to do is break
- a few plates over your head
And fall from the sky
and stuff.
- No, there will be no
- breaking plates or falling
In this apartment.
- Okay, well, then I will
practice my career elsewhere.
- So... bombed your test
- and looking for
An exciting fall-back career?
- I'm rethinking stuntman.
- Oh, I always wanted to be
a stunt man.
- You stay a janitor.
- You... the palm woods is offering
- a manager trainee program.
It's the ultimate job
when your dreams fail.
- Never.
- I'm smarter than Logan.
And here are two frozen corn
dogs to stop the swelling.
- Corn dogs are not the answer.
- Okay, everybody,
stop falling on my desk.
- Oh, there you are.
I've got some of your things.
Here's your hockey magazine
that I borrowed,
- your dress shoes,
- which I polished,
- Oh, and your snap-tight
- rescue ranger fire truck.
- The wheel was missing
- when I borrowed it.
- Okay,
it was a boyfriend test,
which we are not.
We are best friends.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Then you won't mind taking
last month's
"are you really besties?" Test?
- I'm leaving.
- Best friends don't leave
- best friends.
Hit me.
- "Do you know your besties
- favorite color?"
- Purple.
- Correct.
- "Have you been on campouts
- or vacations together?"
- We live in the same apartment.
- I'll count that as a yes.
- "What is
- your b-f-f's birthday?"
- September 3rd?
- Eh!
4th.
"Where did you meet your b-f-f?"
- Kindergarten?
- Danny craven's
- fifth birthday party.
- Bald eagle?
- Eh!
- Cream rinse and conditioner?
Apples...
No, grapes.
- More purple-y stuff.
Chewbacca.
Three... nine.
- No.
- Wrong.
- Eh!
- No.
Wrong again.
- So how'd I do...
Best friend?
- You scored an "a,"
as in a person
who is no longer my bestie.
- It's no use.
- We're trapped.
Trapped in our own studio.
- And we're surrounded
- by Griffin's crazy tests.
- And they could be anywhere.
- Actually,
there's only two tests left.
One, rcm's innovative wall
conferencing system,
which works great.
And two, this thing.
Now, who wants to try it?
- Sweetie,
- you don't have to decide
On your future career today.
Please.
- So far today I've failed
- at stuntman,
Books on tape narrator,
pet psychic, and now chef,
which I thought would be like
a doctor in the kitchen.
I'm calling it.
Time of death:
Now.
- You and me are a lot alike,
- Logan.
- Please don't say that.
- We both failed
at our dream jobs.
- You'll never be a stuntman.
- Don't you crush my dreams.
- Look, life doesn't always turn
- out the way you'd like it to.
Like, how you failed
the biggest test of your life,
and...
I'm coming down with a cold.
- Huh.
Hmm, yep, you do sound warm.
You know what you need?
A corn dog.
- Oh, come on.
- Corn dogs are not the answer.
- I do feel better.
- Oh, he's feels better.
You failed.
I passed.
Smart one.
- You know,
maybe you'd feel better
if you had a solid future
like Carlos.
- Don't be too nice
- to the residents.
They will walk all over you.
- Hey, can I get a new key card?
- Ahh!
- You're a natural.
- Take two of these,
and you'll feel better.
- Okay, so I failed
the best friend test.
But you would have too.
What's my favorite color?
- Blue.
- Your favorite food
- is veggie pizza.
- If you could own any animal
- in the world,
It would be the occelot.
- The nectarine
- is your favorite fruit.
- Your first crush was Elin fekete
- because of her cute laugh,
- And, oh,
- do I know your biggest secret,
And I'd tell you,
- but I swore that I'd speak
- those words out loud.
- Okay, that's good.
But this is not about me.
- It's about you and how a girl
- that you had
A big crush on left.
- And you want to take a test
- to deal with it,
We'll take a test.
- What magazine?
- Best friends illustrated.
True or false:
James diamond is amazing
- and never feels sorry
- for himself.
- True.
True or false:
Lucy stone was also amazing
- but is not the only amazing girl
- in the world.
True.
- When James diamond
- is in the crib,
And there is a pool full
of amazing girls
just downstairs, he "a,"
fights with his best friend
over pop tiger tests, or "b,"
runs down there
and gets his pool on.
- "B," pool on!
Look, out ladies.
James diamond is back.
Ha-ha-ha!
- So are you and James
- are back together?
- Yep.
- Okay, we are not testing
- that thing
Till you tell us what it does.
- The weight-i-ator is
- an internal cell accelerator
That vibrates excess weight
at such hyper speeds,
it reduces your body size
up to 20% instantly.
Now, who's first?
- Come on.
- It's revolutionary.
- And nobody leaves
until we test it?
- That's right.
- Then let's test it.
Great.
Full power.
Three, two...
Now!
Yes, the weight-i-ator
is a huge success.
- So we can go now.
- Sure.
- You might want to get
working on a "reverse" setting.
- Duly noted.
Both: Move out.
- Okay, what is going on?
- Well, I'm over Lucy leaving.
- And James and I
are besties forever.
- But Logan bombed
- his medical test,
And Carlos is a doctor.
- Oh.
- Hello, I hope you're having
- a palm woods day.
How can I help you?
- Look, I'm prescribing you
- to take off that jacket
And try and be a doctor again.
- No, you're the smart one.
You're the doctor now.
- Dr. Carlos,
- I still a bit achy.
- Did he just prescribe a...
Yep.
- Carlos,
- for the last time,
- Corn dogs are not the answer
- to everything.
- Yes, it is.
- What?
You guessed on the entire test?
- Are you serious.
- Well, I mean,
he always did say
that I was the lucky one.
And you still get to be
the smart one.
- And you'll just study harder
and take the test again.
- Yeah, well, maybe I'm not
cut out to be a doctor?
- Well, I know I'm not.
- Yeah, I mean, bitters is red
- in the face
- And holding his throat, and he
- has no idea what that means.
Oh! He's choking.
- He's choking.
- He's actually choking.
- Is there a doctor
- in the house?
- Okay, everyone, stand back.
- Oh.
- Oh!
- Are you okay?
- You saved my life.
Thank you.
- And I am taking you out of that
- training program,
- So you can continue studying
- for that test.
- I guess I did kind of
spring into action
- it was spring-tastic.
- I guess saving people
is in my blood.
- And I'll be there
right by your side.
- Great.
- Great?
Doncha mean chum hug!
All:
Don't be a stuntman.
- Fine.
- ♪ Step it up,
- get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪