Ana (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Marihuana - full transcript
Ana postea un comentario en las redes sociales de LatinTuber. Papasito ayuda a Ana con la construcción de un personaje para un casting. La relación de Ana y Papasito pasa a otro nivel.
Hands up!
Open your legs!
Wait.
Too late.
Now you look more Mexican.
MARIHUANA
ANA
Hi, family. How are you?
Hey, I'm really excited
because this video
has gotten a lot of requests.
So let me tell you
a little bit
about what I do,
how I get these abs,
how I avoid having
chunky arms,
which is what we're
all afraid of, right?
Girls and Dogs?
So, the first thing I do
is walk.
Boring.
What now? Another casting?
Yes.
My dad told me
you didn't get Morticia.
I know.
Are you a carnival dancer now?
No, I'm a Latina from the coast,
just a normal girl like me.
Oh, honey! I'm a normal girl.
You could never be.
-I'll bring your order.
-Thanks.
Cute dog,
I could eat her up...
CUTE DOG, I COULD EAT HER UP!!!
-Enjoy.
-Thanks.
Your daily Uber is here.
Come on. Oh!
Put that on my tab.
What happened to you?
Did your brain explode?
Be quiet!
Let me guess. The character is...
A poor Latina from the coast
who comes to the States,
fleeing from the mafia.
She's tough, but sexy.
Want some?
A poor Latina?
Poor and sexy.
Who's escaping the ghetto?
That's what they want.
Ghetto, but sexy.
Hey! Hold on.
Park here!
Girls and dogs! Stop the car!
Okay, okay.
Want some?
Are you going to tell me
who we're stalking?
Girl or dog?
That's her!
No, that's not her.
-They're all the same.
-I wish.
There she is, that's her.
You seem a lot
more interesting to me.
You want to be like them?
With their 25 year old skin
and 18 year old glutes? Yes.
See?
They treat you
according to how you look.
She's lovely,
and gets lovely treatment.
They look cloned.
That's why I respect fashion,
because you can be
someone different every day.
Right.
Like you. Who did you
get dressed for today?
I told you. For the audition.
I mean, it's not the way
I see the character, but...
But you got dressed for them.
-Aren't you from the coast?
-You tell them.
What if you had
dressed for yourself?
How would you look?
SECOND-HAND STORE
No, she wouldn't wear that color.
Why not?
Because...
she's running away, you know?
She's running away
from these dudes,
from the coast,
and she wouldn't wear
bright yellow, she'd wear...
-Something rural.
-Yeah.
Like a boy.
She could look
just like a boy,
she wants to be low-key,
she has no time to flirt,
she has no time for
anything, she wants to be...
Invisible.
Exactly.
Benny gave this to her.
-Benny?
-Her dad.
He gave it to her on the
last day they saw each other.
-It's been a year since then.
-He stayed at the coast.
-She's been running for a year.
-From the IRS.
What?
Sorry. I got carried away.
He gave it to her
to remember him by.
Because that's all he had.
He didn't have anything else.
And every time
she wears this shirt...
She remembers him...
And everything she left behind.
Yes, Richard,
I'm not the woman you think I am.
I have run, and run
and run for too long.
So if you don't want
a strong Latina,
if you want a maid
or a toy or a princess,
get out of this house
and go back to your mommy.
Thank you, we'll let you know.
I can do it again.
You know, we need
spice and sassiness.
No, I can be spicy.
"And go back to your mommy."
She doesn't work.
You come here dressed
like you look like...
somebody's mom in Alabama.
No, no, no.
Actually, I changed my mind
before coming here.
I have other clothes.
It'll take me five minutes.
Right, look,
we need real Latinas.
Look. I am a real Latina.
See?
I can do it.
You have to believe me.
These are real Latinas.
I'm from Veracruz.
Next!
How did it go?
Let's go.
What happened?
Take me home.
Hey, Ana!
Hey!
You'll get something better.
When?
I've been in Los Angeles
for ten years, ten!
Why are you still here?
Because, in Mexico,
I can only be a soap star.
And here, you can be the
fake version of a Latina.
Well, you have to start
somewhere, right?
Plus, if you make it here,
everyone looks at you.
Let's go for a stroll,
I want to take you somewhere.
Okay?
Fine.
VOGUING HOUSE
We're lucky,
today's event is private.
Welcome!
Mother, Ana. Ana, Mother.
Say hi, girls.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Welcome home.
Thanks. Where are we?
I'm in Titicaca, dear.
Kidding. I just have the runs.
It's a voguing house.
Rejects come and live here,
people who are kicked out
of their homes.
-And Mother...
-At your service.
welcomes them
to this community.
We can be ourselves
24 hours a day
without anyone bothering us.
This is one of the first
houses we founded.
And the voguing contest
is very popular.
I help them with
the chanting on some nights.
Okay, and what's chanting?
A good chanter always brings
out your wild side.
Ready, girls?
Come on.
The show's about to start.
Come on.
Everyone get ready.
Get that bitch out!
Pose, girl, show it off!
Smash it, smash it.
Smash it...
Give me that!
Get your bitch out.
That's right, bitch.
Right on, babe,
yes, babe, work it!
Spin that body, spin and drop!
Yas queen!
Hands up!
We've got sausage tonight
and the Master Chanter
is on the menu!
So take the opportunity, babes.
Chanter, chanter, chanter,
chanter, chanter, chanter!
Chanter, chanter, chanter,
Chanter, chanter, chanter!
This isn't real
But it's something you can feel
The girls touch me
But I'm just ordinary
Do you like it horizontal
Or lateral?
Less cerebral
I feel it, I feel special
Almost tropical, mortal is my
Tone when I warm up your...
Yeah!
You're the Holy Grail
Sing it, boy!
You're the Holy Grail
Whatever that is
Whatever it is
Cease
This is the world of police
You see me coming and you flee
Like geese, peace
-Looking pretty, Marisela.
-Yeah.
What about that body?
-Silicone or collagen?
-No, man, it's the real thing!
The real thing.
You're ready, then.
Hey, let's meet our guest!
Come up here!
What do we say to guests?
Runway! Runway!
Runway! Runway!
Runway! Runway!
Ready?
Wait. What are the rules?
The rule is that
there are no rules.
Marisela! Marisela! Marisela!
Marisela! Marisela! Marisela!
You want Marisela?
Here you go, bitches!
Follow me.
Remember what I taught you.
You flirt.
Runway, Marisela
Confident on the runway
Show me femininity
Show me confidence
Kill the mannequin
Let your wild side loose
Smash the dance floor
Show me a blister
Kick off those shoes
Unleash chaos
Let the flow drag you...
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
I'm the killah
I'm jam and you're butter
You want strength, I got tons
You want in, get in line
I got the stuff, daddy
What you wanna' know about me?
I want the biggest
Meal on my table
With beans, eggs and mayo
Listen up
I want a full heart
Because I've suffered!
I've got a wounded heart
I've felt cold and alone
Let me explain, sir
You've gotta be kind
I want a handsome man
To kiss my skin
I got honey, don't want no hubby
Or a luxury car
I want happiness, daddy!
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
Bitch
I'm putting some
disco balls up there.
In that garden, you could
plant one, two, three
or four Mary plants.
Pure sun, water and love.
Let's start with just one,
because my plants die fast.
Okay, I can plant one while
you're gone in Veracruz.
Okay, I'll give you my keys.
In exchange,
I'll tell you a secret.
I love secrets.
You like keeping secrets,
because you never
talk about yourself.
You're just more interesting.
How can I be more interesting?
You took me to East L.A.,
you taught me voguing,
you took me to
a Free Willy store...
Good will.
Right. You're much
more interesting.
-Hey...
-Yeah?
When you kiss heartthrobs
on television...
Yeah?
Do your boyfriends get jealous,
or are they used to it?
I don't know.
I don't like jealous men.
Me neither, I prefer
open relationships.
Sexually open?
Or emotionally, above all.
Okay but what if
you fall in love
with someone else?
Or worse, your partner
falls in love with someone else?
-Let them.
-No, I would die.
-If you let someone go...
-Yeah.
-and they don't come back...
-"They were never yours."
Give me a break. That's so Zen.
-Hey, give me some.
-Get your own, babe.
Hey, what the hell?
Hey, hey.
What? You can't share a pizza
but you can share a woman'.
I can share a woman or a man,
but never a pizza.
I get jealous of that.
-What?
-There can be only one pizza.
No, no, no, no.
You mean you can share a man?
Listen.
I dated a guy. No big deal.
Really?
There were three of us.
Him, me and a girl.
They used me as a sex toy.
I liked both of them.
He was blond.
I liked his beard.
He found my G-spot.
Yeah right.
The G-spot doesn't exist.
The patriarchy made
it up to control us.
I don't know.
I just let myself go.
You should do the same.
Well...
I...
am dating a girl.
And it's my first time.
I kissed her down there.
Was that the secret?
Yeah!
I mean...
It's not easy for me to
let go and be carefree.
We all experiment.
You're not listening.
I didn't get the part.
But you tried.
But trying doesn't pay
the rent or the power bill.
-Listen.
-Ana.
Today was fun.
We had a great time,
we smoked and danced
like crazy, but that's
not the real world.
-No?
-No!
In the real world,
you dress up like a piñata
to land a role as a Latina.
I need to renew my green card,
I don't have a job,
and my savings are running out.
I need to be disciplined,
educated, pretty, dramatic,
and laugh with a
full set of teeth.
And I'm almost 40!
What the hell am I going to do?
I'm sorry.
It's true,
I always ask questions.
You know why?
Because I don't have the answers.
One thing I do know
is that life is five minutes
of watching the sea.
Five minutes of dancing like crazy.
Nothing more. Nothing else matters.
Everything else ends,
but this is forever.
You're a lot of fun.
In a heart-breaking way.
Let's make a deal.
Let's be lovers.
Without benefits.
What?
-No fuck buddies?
-Exactly.
-I like it.
-Yeah?
Now show me your face.
Show me your soul.
Show me your legs.
Show me your feet.
-Show me your butt.
-Hey!
-Show me your pizza.
-No, never. I already told you.
TO MY REAL FAMILY
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO REALITY,
PLEASE DON'T TELL MY MOM.
Open your legs!
Wait.
Too late.
Now you look more Mexican.
MARIHUANA
ANA
Hi, family. How are you?
Hey, I'm really excited
because this video
has gotten a lot of requests.
So let me tell you
a little bit
about what I do,
how I get these abs,
how I avoid having
chunky arms,
which is what we're
all afraid of, right?
Girls and Dogs?
So, the first thing I do
is walk.
Boring.
What now? Another casting?
Yes.
My dad told me
you didn't get Morticia.
I know.
Are you a carnival dancer now?
No, I'm a Latina from the coast,
just a normal girl like me.
Oh, honey! I'm a normal girl.
You could never be.
-I'll bring your order.
-Thanks.
Cute dog,
I could eat her up...
CUTE DOG, I COULD EAT HER UP!!!
-Enjoy.
-Thanks.
Your daily Uber is here.
Come on. Oh!
Put that on my tab.
What happened to you?
Did your brain explode?
Be quiet!
Let me guess. The character is...
A poor Latina from the coast
who comes to the States,
fleeing from the mafia.
She's tough, but sexy.
Want some?
A poor Latina?
Poor and sexy.
Who's escaping the ghetto?
That's what they want.
Ghetto, but sexy.
Hey! Hold on.
Park here!
Girls and dogs! Stop the car!
Okay, okay.
Want some?
Are you going to tell me
who we're stalking?
Girl or dog?
That's her!
No, that's not her.
-They're all the same.
-I wish.
There she is, that's her.
You seem a lot
more interesting to me.
You want to be like them?
With their 25 year old skin
and 18 year old glutes? Yes.
See?
They treat you
according to how you look.
She's lovely,
and gets lovely treatment.
They look cloned.
That's why I respect fashion,
because you can be
someone different every day.
Right.
Like you. Who did you
get dressed for today?
I told you. For the audition.
I mean, it's not the way
I see the character, but...
But you got dressed for them.
-Aren't you from the coast?
-You tell them.
What if you had
dressed for yourself?
How would you look?
SECOND-HAND STORE
No, she wouldn't wear that color.
Why not?
Because...
she's running away, you know?
She's running away
from these dudes,
from the coast,
and she wouldn't wear
bright yellow, she'd wear...
-Something rural.
-Yeah.
Like a boy.
She could look
just like a boy,
she wants to be low-key,
she has no time to flirt,
she has no time for
anything, she wants to be...
Invisible.
Exactly.
Benny gave this to her.
-Benny?
-Her dad.
He gave it to her on the
last day they saw each other.
-It's been a year since then.
-He stayed at the coast.
-She's been running for a year.
-From the IRS.
What?
Sorry. I got carried away.
He gave it to her
to remember him by.
Because that's all he had.
He didn't have anything else.
And every time
she wears this shirt...
She remembers him...
And everything she left behind.
Yes, Richard,
I'm not the woman you think I am.
I have run, and run
and run for too long.
So if you don't want
a strong Latina,
if you want a maid
or a toy or a princess,
get out of this house
and go back to your mommy.
Thank you, we'll let you know.
I can do it again.
You know, we need
spice and sassiness.
No, I can be spicy.
"And go back to your mommy."
She doesn't work.
You come here dressed
like you look like...
somebody's mom in Alabama.
No, no, no.
Actually, I changed my mind
before coming here.
I have other clothes.
It'll take me five minutes.
Right, look,
we need real Latinas.
Look. I am a real Latina.
See?
I can do it.
You have to believe me.
These are real Latinas.
I'm from Veracruz.
Next!
How did it go?
Let's go.
What happened?
Take me home.
Hey, Ana!
Hey!
You'll get something better.
When?
I've been in Los Angeles
for ten years, ten!
Why are you still here?
Because, in Mexico,
I can only be a soap star.
And here, you can be the
fake version of a Latina.
Well, you have to start
somewhere, right?
Plus, if you make it here,
everyone looks at you.
Let's go for a stroll,
I want to take you somewhere.
Okay?
Fine.
VOGUING HOUSE
We're lucky,
today's event is private.
Welcome!
Mother, Ana. Ana, Mother.
Say hi, girls.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Welcome home.
Thanks. Where are we?
I'm in Titicaca, dear.
Kidding. I just have the runs.
It's a voguing house.
Rejects come and live here,
people who are kicked out
of their homes.
-And Mother...
-At your service.
welcomes them
to this community.
We can be ourselves
24 hours a day
without anyone bothering us.
This is one of the first
houses we founded.
And the voguing contest
is very popular.
I help them with
the chanting on some nights.
Okay, and what's chanting?
A good chanter always brings
out your wild side.
Ready, girls?
Come on.
The show's about to start.
Come on.
Everyone get ready.
Get that bitch out!
Pose, girl, show it off!
Smash it, smash it.
Smash it...
Give me that!
Get your bitch out.
That's right, bitch.
Right on, babe,
yes, babe, work it!
Spin that body, spin and drop!
Yas queen!
Hands up!
We've got sausage tonight
and the Master Chanter
is on the menu!
So take the opportunity, babes.
Chanter, chanter, chanter,
chanter, chanter, chanter!
Chanter, chanter, chanter,
Chanter, chanter, chanter!
This isn't real
But it's something you can feel
The girls touch me
But I'm just ordinary
Do you like it horizontal
Or lateral?
Less cerebral
I feel it, I feel special
Almost tropical, mortal is my
Tone when I warm up your...
Yeah!
You're the Holy Grail
Sing it, boy!
You're the Holy Grail
Whatever that is
Whatever it is
Cease
This is the world of police
You see me coming and you flee
Like geese, peace
-Looking pretty, Marisela.
-Yeah.
What about that body?
-Silicone or collagen?
-No, man, it's the real thing!
The real thing.
You're ready, then.
Hey, let's meet our guest!
Come up here!
What do we say to guests?
Runway! Runway!
Runway! Runway!
Runway! Runway!
Ready?
Wait. What are the rules?
The rule is that
there are no rules.
Marisela! Marisela! Marisela!
Marisela! Marisela! Marisela!
You want Marisela?
Here you go, bitches!
Follow me.
Remember what I taught you.
You flirt.
Runway, Marisela
Confident on the runway
Show me femininity
Show me confidence
Kill the mannequin
Let your wild side loose
Smash the dance floor
Show me a blister
Kick off those shoes
Unleash chaos
Let the flow drag you...
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
I'm the killah
I'm jam and you're butter
You want strength, I got tons
You want in, get in line
I got the stuff, daddy
What you wanna' know about me?
I want the biggest
Meal on my table
With beans, eggs and mayo
Listen up
I want a full heart
Because I've suffered!
I've got a wounded heart
I've felt cold and alone
Let me explain, sir
You've gotta be kind
I want a handsome man
To kiss my skin
I got honey, don't want no hubby
Or a luxury car
I want happiness, daddy!
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
What you wanna' know about me?
Bitch
I'm putting some
disco balls up there.
In that garden, you could
plant one, two, three
or four Mary plants.
Pure sun, water and love.
Let's start with just one,
because my plants die fast.
Okay, I can plant one while
you're gone in Veracruz.
Okay, I'll give you my keys.
In exchange,
I'll tell you a secret.
I love secrets.
You like keeping secrets,
because you never
talk about yourself.
You're just more interesting.
How can I be more interesting?
You took me to East L.A.,
you taught me voguing,
you took me to
a Free Willy store...
Good will.
Right. You're much
more interesting.
-Hey...
-Yeah?
When you kiss heartthrobs
on television...
Yeah?
Do your boyfriends get jealous,
or are they used to it?
I don't know.
I don't like jealous men.
Me neither, I prefer
open relationships.
Sexually open?
Or emotionally, above all.
Okay but what if
you fall in love
with someone else?
Or worse, your partner
falls in love with someone else?
-Let them.
-No, I would die.
-If you let someone go...
-Yeah.
-and they don't come back...
-"They were never yours."
Give me a break. That's so Zen.
-Hey, give me some.
-Get your own, babe.
Hey, what the hell?
Hey, hey.
What? You can't share a pizza
but you can share a woman'.
I can share a woman or a man,
but never a pizza.
I get jealous of that.
-What?
-There can be only one pizza.
No, no, no, no.
You mean you can share a man?
Listen.
I dated a guy. No big deal.
Really?
There were three of us.
Him, me and a girl.
They used me as a sex toy.
I liked both of them.
He was blond.
I liked his beard.
He found my G-spot.
Yeah right.
The G-spot doesn't exist.
The patriarchy made
it up to control us.
I don't know.
I just let myself go.
You should do the same.
Well...
I...
am dating a girl.
And it's my first time.
I kissed her down there.
Was that the secret?
Yeah!
I mean...
It's not easy for me to
let go and be carefree.
We all experiment.
You're not listening.
I didn't get the part.
But you tried.
But trying doesn't pay
the rent or the power bill.
-Listen.
-Ana.
Today was fun.
We had a great time,
we smoked and danced
like crazy, but that's
not the real world.
-No?
-No!
In the real world,
you dress up like a piñata
to land a role as a Latina.
I need to renew my green card,
I don't have a job,
and my savings are running out.
I need to be disciplined,
educated, pretty, dramatic,
and laugh with a
full set of teeth.
And I'm almost 40!
What the hell am I going to do?
I'm sorry.
It's true,
I always ask questions.
You know why?
Because I don't have the answers.
One thing I do know
is that life is five minutes
of watching the sea.
Five minutes of dancing like crazy.
Nothing more. Nothing else matters.
Everything else ends,
but this is forever.
You're a lot of fun.
In a heart-breaking way.
Let's make a deal.
Let's be lovers.
Without benefits.
What?
-No fuck buddies?
-Exactly.
-I like it.
-Yeah?
Now show me your face.
Show me your soul.
Show me your legs.
Show me your feet.
-Show me your butt.
-Hey!
-Show me your pizza.
-No, never. I already told you.
TO MY REAL FAMILY
ANY RESEMBLANCE TO REALITY,
PLEASE DON'T TELL MY MOM.